#like its canon but it still hurts

[quietwingsinthesky]

thinking about how dean’s character gets simplified in fandom, or more specifically, the very black and white lens that gets applied to him. because integral to dean, from my point of view, is that he is both a victim of abuse and a perpetrator of it. that these two things do not cancel each other out or outweigh each other to the point that only one matters. he’s both, you cannot separate him from the fact that he’s both.

but very often, people do. dean is either a victim. or he’s an abuser. it’s like it’s hard for people to hold both those facts in their heads at once. dean went through incredible amount of trauma as a child and an adult, is routinely faced with violence, has resorted to alcohol abuse to cope with it. he’s also a violent person, someone who retreats into tactics of emotional abuse and control when he feels threatened, who hurts the people around him constantly and the people who are closest to him (ie Sam, Cas, later Jack) get the brunt of that abuse. these are just facts. they’re things that happened on the screen and cannot be denied.

and it’s. idk it’s weird to me (not unexpected, because he’s hardly the only character to ever get this treatment) that dean of all people is the one portrayed in such an either/or way when one of the defining moments of the show for him is that during his stint in Hell, he was tortured and then became a torturer to escape that, to feel like he had some control again, and he relished in it. it’s baked into who he is.

#dean as a victim of abuse who goes on to continue those behaviors is still important to me surprise surprise #i didnt want to put this in the main post but also. from observation. when people start projecting onto him This Gets Worse #because. you know. as noted before: big fandom - lots of queer & neurodivergent people here. #tend to be targetted by abuse. statistically. #and mix that with a character you can project heavily upon. one you can project queer/neurodivergent hcs on even. #then like! understandably stressful to reckon with him being canonically kind of shitty sometimes! no one wants to consider their own #potential for shittiness - not even through a character they just heavily relate to! #(note: opposite happens as well. people project onto sam -> see dean hurt sam -> block out the idea that dean could be just as much victim #as he is abuser. its just. easier like that.) #anyway. none of this is like. a crime. just an observation. really we get all our biases from the society we live in — a society obsessed #with perfect victims and evil unredeemable abusers. #all that stuff leaks into fandom takes whether we want it to or not #dean winchester #spn

[mishapen-dear]

thinking about 4halo again and dying

they just. they used to be so sweet together. and then the election arc managed to genuinely turn them against each other (and bad is still affected by being caged in the museum) and i would NOT have been surprised if a rebellion had started within the next few weeks after their last fight and. they used to be friends and then they almost destroyed each other

and then the eggs went missing

and there are so many parallels between them, but one of the biggest parallels is how they're both protectors. they both protected the eggs (and, when he became president, forever extended that protection to the other islanders) but the eggs went missing and they had to put all of that aside. Forever was quicker to put it down than Bad was (it felt like only a very temporary truce, from Bad's end), but they put their problems on hold, because their eggs. were gone.

and another parallel. the destruction. both of them with their plans to cause ruin because then, maybe, theyll get their kids back. bad caused most of the grieving arc damage directly, and got aypierre and antoine to help him. he dug holes in the ground. he placed mines everywhere and leapt into them. he started the lavacasting process of the fed building (and was interrupted by admins, so he stopped, but philza and fit were still right to laugh at him lmaoo). he drilled a hole through the side of the federation office from a huge distance away. he has chosen to hurt his friends and himself to get the eggs back. whatever the cost.

forever destroyed the island. or he planned to destroy the island. or he was interrupted just before he destroyed the island or or or. I don't know. but it was big, and it was bad. bad enough that the feds had to step in and forcefully drug him, and kickstart the happy pills arc.

and the happy pills arc..... oughghghgh as fucking awful as it was for their characters to experience i genuinely truly think that it saved them from each other. when he was first told about forever being fucked up bad was still in the "i need to kick his butt" mindset, and was all ready for an excuse to kill forever. and then he saw forever. and the first proposal happened. and bad was angry and he was sad and upset and he was careful. forever tried to kill him. bad decided to save him. forever kept trying to marry him. forever kept taking the pills. forever was so scared of his own anger and all of the damage he could and would have caused to his family that he kept taking drugs that kept him so out of his mind he hallucinated his son was just sleeping safely at his house.

and they both tried to kill each other. and they both failed.

and bad showed phil and cellbit (and tubbo) the item scanner that dapper discovered, which could destroy him, because nothing else was working. because they needed to save forever. because bad was reminded by then that forever was a victim of the federation instead of just a mouthpiece for it. and then when forever woke up he saw bad, suffering, and so excited to see him awake.

and now they're here on opposite sides again with forever projecting his protection urges onto the fed worker in bad's basement and bad frustrated that he isn't being believed and his evil plans of giving ron lemons apology brownies is being interrupted and. look at them. soft "i hate you" and the appreciation room and bad's quiet heartbreak when he learned about forever being missing and the "i miss you" book bad got mad at because it asked him not to torture fed workers. does anyone hear me im so ill about them. do you understand they care about each other so much and the happy pills arc reminded them of that. forever realized bad is colourblind and bad assumed forever was poisoning him and then forever helped bad cheat on another colourblindness test and forever was giving bad flowers and bad was accepting them and accepted that he was colourblind despite his previously constant denial and! i don't know if im being comprehensible and i dont really care i will be honest i just need you to know i am frothing at the mouth like a rabid little beast. they are a TRAGEDY of miscommunication and external pressure but they love so so much. platonic or romantic or qpp they CARE and it tears me to shreds

#qsmp #4halo #i feel like ive talked about this exact thing like three separate times but #its one of those things that really Kills Me #and its CRUCIAL to understanding them and their relationship #they were fighting and now have found peace in hell #and forever using his care for bad as a distraction to not focus on his Own woes #and the way he's so sure bad needs help the way he was helped that at heart bad is a good person who doesnt want to be hurting people #and in a Way he's right. bad doesn't want to hurt his loved ones. everyone else? yeah. in a heartbeat. but his family... #but he's still makign the choice to do it. it's not lashign out in desperation the way forever destroying the island was #bad is hurting people with Purpose. he's putting thought into it. he's testing people and their knowledge and their motivations and he will #use them all as tools that can be bent and broken if it means they get the eggs back. he'll do it to himself too #especially to himself #ghhhgrhrgh the way theyre both self sacrificial and self destructive the Parallels the fucking parallels #i can best examine their relationship from a bbh pov and it agonizes me because i can't get all the nuance of forever's pov #because i dont speak portuguese yet :c #so best i can do is talk crazy about them like a Lure for other analyst shippers #pspspssps dont you see my ship. dont you see how canon 4halo is !!! in 8 acts #dont you want to examine them and their parallels and the way they are both so strange about relationships but they're finding a way to car #in a way that works for them #pspspsps #like me talking about qbbh vacation arc got the fandom acknowledging his sillies and directly got me a friend to talk about him to (hi kia! #maybe it will work here also #come to the dark side we have complex relationship dynamics that are frequently misunderstood and mislabelled #YOU can help change the world

[druidonity2]

2021 Shadowlands fanart.

#world of warcraft #anduin wrynn #Garrosh follows this with something like 'yeah your not but maybe i am' so i sorta take the quote out of context but #I remember Anduin being very upset about the mere idea hes compaired to Arthas #Its always seemed to me that his similarities with arthas are something that lowkey bothers him because so many only see that in him #Of course people hurt by Arthas will be a bit weary of a human boy with blonde hair who claims to champion the light and justice #Especially one who is a prince of an important human kingdom #So its something hes self-conscious of and is keen to prove people he's not destine to fail #Which is why #even if he didn't become another Arthas entirely #what happens in SLs is so much more traumatic to him #He hurt people he cared about #he hurt innocent souls #((and his situation of mind control is more akin to sylvanas' then arthas but does he see that that way? Or do his fears blind his view?)) #And blizz didnt go into detail what this meant but Arthas was used against him literally #My headcanon is that Anduin knew and could feel it and hear arthas in the sword #but in the cinematic anduin is surprised by arthas' soul appearing so canon says anduin didnt know #He dissappers because he is unsure if the bad feelings he felt orignated from him or zovaal or arthas so #prehaps he is afraid that everyone was right to be weary of him #Maybe he didnt end up as arthas at the end of shadowlands but that doesnt mean he can't still go down a dark path #he is afraid he is more capable of becoming an unjust and cruel leader then he thought he could #His people have every right to be upset that he abandoned them #but they dont know that he left because he was afraid he could hurt them and feel joy from it

[good-beanswrites]

I’m thinking about the angst of the restraints headcanon again. There’s the two with the least physically violent crimes, and they rank relatively low in strength. There’s the child who was violent but had to be really crafty about it; she’s the weakest of all of them. And the most dangerous of the guilty prisoners cannot be restrained.

This makes me so emotional!!! All three are the smallest of their circles. Two of them are extremely ordinary people who have never experienced/expressed physical violence before. One hadn't even fathomed the idea of someone dying until they actually did. And yet, they're subjected to the type of restraints you'd expect to see on someone who is uncontrollably violent. The fact that prisoners who committed very gruesome murders can walk free (including Mikoto) just adds insult to injury. I still couldn't everything into words, but here's a Mahiru-centric drabble featuring the same thoughts. It takes place after T1 closes but before the attacks.

“Where are our rights?”

Fuuta’s shout caused Mahiru to wince. She perched on her bedding, watching the two prisoners she’d invited to her cell. It hadn’t been the fun kind of invitation, though. Back in school, she always wanted to have parties and dates back at her place. Moving to the city, she imagined what it would be like to make university friends and take them back home with her to talk, eat, and have fun. 

Sitting in her dim gray cell with Fuuta and Amane, all of them held fast by complex sets of restraints, was not what she’d had in mind.

Amane knelt in the corner. Her arms were crossed, as if pouting, though the opposite was true. A moment ago her eyes had lowered in prayer, but it was difficult to find any peace of mind now. Fuuta snapped and shouted as he paced the length of the cell bars. They were unlocked, but like the others, he didn’t feel like being out in front of everyone. He’d give his uniform a violent jerk every now and then, but it didn’t do any good. Between his strides and growls, he made Mahiru think of those poor wild animals they keep at the circus.

“Take it easy, Fuuta.” She mustered up a smile. “Come rest with us.”

“I can’t believe you two. You’re just gonna sit here and take it? I didn’t do a fucking thing! They’re acting like I’m some big danger to society,” he yanked his arms again, to no avail. “All I did was type some things onto a screen. I’m not gonna go around stabbing anyone or anything. And you, you didn’t hurt anyone either!”

He nodded his head to Mahiru. If her arms weren’t already folded over her chest, she would have hugged herself anyway. 

“Well… I did hurt him in the end… I broke his heart badly enough that… I mean, he…”

Fuuta made a disgusted sound. “That’s all stupid romance stuff. I’m saying, you never stabbed him. Never strangled him. Never poisoned his food, or –”

“Oh god, no! How horrible…”

“Exactly! From what we’ve heard, it sounds like Haruka killed someone with his bare hands. I think Muu had a knife or something. Shidou had a whole arsenal of grisly doctor tools. Kotoko has openly talked about how she beat that guy to death. Why are they allowed to walk free while we’re tied down like wild animals?”

Mahiru was glad she hadn’t mentioned the circus.

“And Amane! It’s not like she did anything violent, and here she is!”

“That is not true.”

Both paused as Amane spoke up for the first time. 

“Eh?”

“While I disagree with my verdict, the restraints make sense.” The others still stared blankly. As matter-of-fact as always, she continued. “I killed with my own hands. I used the amount of force I was instructed to. Just as the sinner fears the wrath of heaven, I can understand how the godless warden would fear my justice.”

Fuuta’s passion wavered, but Mahiru could feel her heart ache for the girl. “Oh Amane… I had no idea. To be pushed to the point of violence at your age…”

“I am not to be pitied. As I said, I am dangerous, and proud to be. I am doing god’s work. All heroes must be dangerous.”

Fuuta grunted, but said nothing. Mahiru gave her a gentle smile. “It’s not pity. Even if you were dangerous, it’s horrible to restrain someone like you. You’ve already had to brave so much, as the smallest of the bunch.”

She looked between the two. A sad laugh escaped her. “Now that I think of it, I guess we’re all the smallest here, hm? Aside from maybe Muu, we don’t have much height or strength on the others…”

“That’s what I’ve been saying!” Fuuta cried. “The fuck do they think we’re going to do?” Mahiru was just glad he’d focused on that rather than the fact she’d just called him weak. 

Voices raised in conversation down the hallway. Mikoto’s laugh echoed faintly into the cell.  

It warmed Mahiru to hear. Things had been so hard on him here. Though it had been frightening to hear him shouting at the restraints til his voice was raw – well, it wasn’t him shouting – it had been a relief when he appeared free and relaxed the following day. He seemed sheepish that he wasn’t able to help the others, having no memory of his escape. Mahiru just kept telling him how happy she was for him.

Fuuta didn’t share in the sentiment. “Meanwhile, Mikoto gets to stroll around free, and he beat the shit out of Es! He could snap and kill any one of us here, and they don’t even give a damn. But ooohhh, god forbid the guy who’s never been violent a day in his life is allowed to use his own two hands!”

The harshness of his voice wasn’t doing his argument many favors. Still, his words were beginning to get through to Mahiru. 

She’d worked so hard to be a model citizen. She was supposed to have a perfect life. She could cook, clean, sew, and take care of children. She did herself up every day; she was never a slob or a slut. She was generous to everyone she met. She showered the world around her in love. Wasn’t it unfair that her hands were tied like some common criminal? What was all that effort for – being patient when people upset her, being kind even when she disagreed with someone, all of that – if she was going to end up in the same place as someone who had stabbed another out of sheer malice?

Amane didn’t seem to be whirling with the same doubts. She closed her eyes once more. “It is simply a trial from heaven. We may be small, but all of us have an internal strength that will carry us through the ordeal.”

“I don’t think it’s any sort of religious thing, but you’re right,” Fuuta puffed his chest out. “Trials like this only make people stronger!” 

“Do you think so?” Mahiru wasn’t sure if she was asking either of them or just musing to herself. It was a nice thought. This was all part of destiny, something meant to be that would make her stronger in the end. 

But she wasn’t so sure she believed in destiny anymore. It hadn’t quite worked out the first time. 

“Hell yeah!” Fuuta must have assumed she was in fact asking him. He gave a wide, toothy grin. “It’s not like we can get any weaker, right? The warden better watch out next trial – they’ve got a big storm coming!”

#milgram #mahiru shiina #fuuta kajiyama #amane momose #and then we had a big storm coming 😔 #thank you for the ask pal!!! im not sure if the drabble is what you had in mind but it was really fun to write lol #mahiru canonically being really tiny and trying to be the model nonconfrontational woman... #fuuta being so small and specifically saying hes never been violent toward anyone and never wanted anyone to get physically hurt... #(and something about fuuta being the closest to the average milgram fan) #amane being very small and weak and only killed a specific person for a very predictable reason... #and theyre all treated like wild animals that could snap at any time :(( #meanwhile the actually unpredictable one who Did lash out and hurt someone just strolls around free #not that its anyones fault hes free -- it wasnt on purpose -- but still it makes the situation that much more painful #it makes me crazy!! i thought putting it into action would help communicate my ideas but idk #drabbles

[stizzysupremacy]

…

#like okay I refuse to shit on anyone’s queer rep parade #and apparently so does everyone else who agrees with me #because I see so many posts about the alleged healthiness of Stede and Ed’s relarionship #and I know I am not crazy. nor am I alone in thinking ‘what healthy relationship???’ #in the finale they are At Best taking their first solid steps towards a healthy relationship #but they haven’t achieved that shit yet. they are actually still the men who didn’t talk to each other. who ran away from each other. #you want to hope for the best. but it throws me off when ppl act like what we got was the best #posts like ‘oh even when he is furious enough to smash a chair into a wall he still wouldn’t hurt stede’ #the scene that reveals that Atede didn’t explain anything and Ed didn’t allow himself the closure of hearing explanations really should be #NOT considered evidence of healthy relationship #okay I’m done I just get sick of seeing that gifset with its reblogs saying that and #’oh they did so well balancing the inherent violence of pirates against healthy relationships’ #girl WHAT healthy relationship?? there’s not a single damn person at that dinner table that knows what a healthy relationship is! #(wait. forgot about Buttons) #(I want to ship these two losers but I want to ship it for the cringefail ongoing train wreck it is #not the perfect queer happily-ever-after-SOMEHOW fairy tale that I don’t think canon supports)

[lifeof-pink]

realizing while reading the epilogue that kim dokja’s constant habit of throwing himself to his death is not necessarily him having a complete plan to come back, but that regardless of if he comes back or not he simply cannot imagine himself having his own happy ending in the end is destroying me… like when did he ever survive specifically for himself?? did he ever want to live not because it would allow his companions to survive but because he himself deserved a place in the world??? idk idk im sad im so sad im wallowing in my own tears rn…. excuse my probable mischaracterization im having a moment

#omniscient reader's viewpoint #orv #orv spoilers #orv epilogue spoilers #my heart burns for him #it hurts im so desperately sad for him #especially with the outright stated suicide attempt…. #like i thought that was just something a fsnfic author wrote but no its fucking canon #i need someone to convince him that he deserves good in the world #and also therapy #despite his whole life he still ended with so much love in his heart #and they loved him so much he was able to come back #my chest hurts #i need someone to hold him and also me

[bugflies00]

i genuinely think i haven’t recovered from that moment november 13 2022 after tommy’s stream went dark and i just had to sit there like. wow. that’s it. that’s actually how they ended it. like it’s not a shitty fan theory this genuinely just happened.

#it was #uh #not my highest point in life #man i was so fucking upset #and yeah we own the characters we can rewrite our canon its ours now etc but like. it still hurt #alex.rambles.txt #c!tommy #mcyt

[morporkian-cryptid]

I'm getting overwhelmed again with wanting to rewrite the entirety of Lupin III - Goodbye Partner as a fic my own way, because I am still salty about how Jigen's betrayal was handled and I am pretty sure I could do a better job than TMS did (hell, they handled that same premise better in Seven Days Rhapsody, and it was a B plot!!)

Except I can't do that because 1) I have to finish writing Hanafuda and 2) I have like. zero plot for it right now (but I know if I put my mind to it I could)

In the meantime please have this song that makes me think about what that movie could have been, while I daydream about magic tricks and lighters and proceed to chew at my walls 👍

#i was already going insane about the use of the lighter in Goodbye Partner #but in retrospect with the added symbolism from ZERO i am losing my entire SHIT #and i'm sure there's something that could be done with the magic trick other than a cute throaway reference to cagliostro #because. cagliostro. the opening credits. the road trip. fire treasure. #cagliostro being canon as backstory for goodbye partner deepens the hurt of the betrayal SO MUCH because HOLY SHIT- #(yes I am still going insane about fire treasure/the opening credits of cagliostro. it's been three years. leave me alone.) #i did like the fact that the kid's relationship to jigen was never explicited though. i'd keep that i think. #mostly i just want to rewrite the way lupin and goemon took jigen's betrayal because it was just NOT handled realistically in that movie #give me some ANGST! give me some TURMOIL! #anyway. that's probably gonna be my next big project after hanafuda IF i can actually figure out a plot #but for now i'm gonna concentrate on my silly little au and its silly little romance 🥰 #lupin iii #daisuke jigen #lupin iii : goodbye partner #the hobbit writes

[collieii]

i'm gonna be honest if i see one more person saying "he just wanted to live peacefully with his brother 🥺" about stampede knives i will not be responsible for what i do next

#if you can't accept his canon genocide gtfo!! #obviously idc if ppl like him but the way some ppl just gloss over like...everything abt his character #taking knives away from you until you learn how to play w him correctly #millions knives #trigun stampede #trigun #ok tbf stampede does make knives. more sympathetic(ish) (despite how many more graphic murders he commits on screen than other knives) #if i remember right in trimax they didnt rly push 'knives is obsessed w vash' very much #stampede did most of that so ik theres a reason ppl say it and its not necessarily wrong but like. still #guys. he cut off his arm. he threatens and hurts all the ppl vash cares about. and vash himself. #he doesn't respect vash or his choices at all. like. #beginning to think he doesnt actually care abt his brother in a meaningful way... #.lieii

[aria0fgold]

Of gems and pages au in the brain again. I was thinking like: It's an au, I don't have to think much bout the friendquests and act 5 happenings when my au is set in a new loop+ scenario and then I remembered... That new loop+ relies on the act 5's loop a bit so now I got to thinkin more about the thing.

Like, with the friendquests, it'll turn out a liiil differently in that it'd be Odile's suggestion for Siffrin to check up on the others considering that the Siff in this au has no recollection of practically anything with the many loops that had occurred. Odile figures out that the others needed help with something and considering how the timeloop appears to be connected with Siff, thinks that it's important for them to be helping the others instead of her. So the friendquests goes like this now:

Odile suggests Siff check up on the others then asks Siff about it afterwards to figure out the next step. She finds out about Mira's bonding proposals and the fact that Siff needed to know Bonbon's favourite foods (for that one, instead of the focus being on Siff choosing, it'd be Odile). After finding that out during loops, Odile drops it as a hint like "I think I saw Mira looking over some bonding proposals, although, don't tell her I said that." and "I should stock up for Boniface's favourite foods. I have a list here, but I don't really need it anymore. You can have it." Meanwhile for her friendquest, she'll be the one to outright ask Siff for help instead of the other way around.

Also, the Euphrasie sequence still has Siff be the one to talk to her, that's also the biggest hint that Odile got about the timeloops being connected to Siffrin (Odile might also try to be the one to talk to Euphrasie too thinking it'd help, but... it didn't). So yea, those are the possible changes to the friendquests. Now for Act 5... Since Odile doesn't really benefit much to the spells the others unlock during the friendquests, I think there's no reason for her to seek them out and try to speedrun it the way that Siff did in canon. So the Act 5 sequence in this au is just directed at Siff. Odile reaching her breaking point and just confronts Siff about it, but horribly...

During that moment, Siff Will loop several times but he won't even remember much of it and it just upsets Odile more and more cuz it's clear as day! It's so crystal clear that the timeloop is connected to Siffrin and their emotions and their wish! SO WHAT IS HIS WISH?! But the more Odile pushes them for the answer in such an aggressive manner, the more Siffrin doesn't wanna speak with how horrified he is. And then Odile notices that, notices just how horrible she went about it and finally just lets go, and takes a step back away from Siff to cool off (and take the orbs in the clocktower while everyone isn't around).

She waits until everyone goes in the clocktower to go to the House. Maybe she can get an answer out of the King instead, maybe if she kills him herself, Something would happen cuz clearly she's-- whatever being is responsible for this's-- "Chosen One" of handling the timeloops being controled by her family member. The way the House warps in Act 5 warps in a manner that "keeps her away," it wants to stall her basically. Courtesy of the theory by someone else about the House during Act 5 warps according to Siffrin's desire of getting to the King faster. So here, it warps to the desire of keeping Odile out cuz as hurt as Siffrin was during that whole argument, when she didn't arrive in the clocktower, he fears that she might be doing something dangerous. And he's right.

Also, during the battle with the King, Odile wasn't being frozen in time the way that Siffrin was in canon. In this au, Odile fights that back and for a split second her lvl reached 100 during then. That has repercussions... which will be: Her body cracking aka getting turned into stone for not only using up all of her craft power but Nearly breaking the limit of which the body can handle. I say Nearly, cuz before Odile can blast the King away with a force of a thousand suns, the family members got to her in time, which broke her focus on the attack and she collapsed from it but it still doesn't change the fact that she Did nearly went past the limit there. And now she's Dying-- But wait! We have new loop+ for that :D

#aria rants #isat au #isat spoilers #of gems and pages au #ogap au #so now the ''everyone remembers act 5 loop'' is a Lot different. the only thatd be hurt by it is siffrin #also smth that im planning to do in the new loop+ is a swap in situation between odile and siffrin in that siff now Remembers the loops #thatd take place during new loop+ (not the overwritten timeline. the only one he'd remember there is the act 5 loop) #so its like being canon siffrin again. but with an odile whose life is in grave danger the more loops happen #also! odile Does still remember all the loops before and during new loop+. but only for a certain time #the more loops happen in new loop+ and the less her level becomes. the more she Forgets about the loops and herself #so then siff and loop will take on the role of reminding her about the memories that matter. theyd remember for her basically #soft moment between an odile in death row. a star. and a rogue. soon the others will join in too. just soft moment #despite all the pain and suffering im putting her through. i love you odile!

[dungeons-and-dragon-age]

oughh......

#laya plays dragon age #da2 #oc: liam hawke #this happened a bit ago already & i wanted to draw sth for it but idk if i will finish that #but i gotta yell abt them anyway because OGH. #i have a lot of emotions about this quest ok #bartrand was the perfect scapegoat he was perfect to direct all the rage and pain at all these years #years of imagining gleeful revenge while bartrand is gloating and laughing like an evil soulless bastard #and then you meet him and he is just. a pathetic husk of a man with barely any own will left #and whats worse. varric is so so torn up about it #varric. the guy who never makes anything about him and who will always handwave and joke when something hits too close to home #drops all efforts to be smart and is just. desperate. begs hawke to not kill his brother #and liam wants to want bartrand dead so bad. he wishes he could look him in the eye and enjoy taking his life #and he knows varric will listen to him if he insisted. he knows when it comes down it it varric will yield to his decision #but he sees this broken guy who is barely the villain he kept projecting onto him and he sees varric and he sees two doomed siblings #and knows what its like to lose your sibling to your own blade #and he cant do it #and he hates it so much. but he wont do it. #and its the reason why i cant decide who dealt the killing blow for bethany bc it makes this scene juicy in different ways #if varric kills bethy its equally wanting to spare each other their siblings blood on their hands #as it is taking some form of revenge (on liams part). we both killed each others siblings. now we are even #the revenge part would still be there if liam did the blow on bethany himself. you made me do that and now i will take bartrand for it #but its also much more i know what its like. i wont make go through that too #if varric killed bethy and then also bartrand it would be more #''its my fault she is dead. i will take the revenge she/you deserves if you tell me to even though it will hurt me #dunno. all good variations i will. have to rotate them in my head more #or maybe just never decide idk they can be in canon limbo forever #anyways thats it for shouting into the void about them for now it Will happen again

[quietwingsinthesky]

im just saying that a guy whose worldview is inflexibly based on the idea that the only two groups of people in the universe are the controlled and the ones who have the power to control them, and that there is no other way to exist, and who has done everything in his power to make sure he’s always in the latter group. i’m just saying that it’s possible this is not unrelated to. that time when he was used as a child by rassilon himself. its possible.

#and i want to be even more clear that this is not me trying to woobify him. you would know if it was because i would be much more annoying #about it. im not trying to lay this out as ‘the drums mean that the master’s actions are excusable actually. all those times he killed So #Many People was fine because he was hurt as a kid.’ #im trying to point out like. now that this is canon. now that this is a part of him. that it is foundational to why he would build up that #worldview at all. yeah? #i keep coming back to the powerlessness of that moment. of the drums. he can’t *do* anything about it. #but he *can* be the master and never be one of the weak people in the universe who ‘allow’ themselves to be controlled #he knows he’s being used in EoT and still expects the time lords to take him with them. because he’s on their side isn’t he? he gets to #ascend too doesn’t he? he gets to be as powerful as they do right? #but. that’s not what’s happening here. it’s what he’s built up in his head but the minute rassilon hits him with the truth. that they have #abused and used him and will now destroy him. just. augh. #a whole world under his heel and its not enough. it will never be enough. he has separated the universe into two parts and neglected to #realize that just because he can put himself in control of some of it doesn’t mean there aren’t other people who have a hand around his #throat still. and it drives me insane #the master #doctor who

[science-lings]

I love that Phoenix's type is just 'guy/girl that starts out/appears perfectly nice but turns out to be/ ends up as the worst most nasty evil person who hates him specifically' no wonder this guy has given up on romantic relationships he has the worst luck.

#i mean in canon he has had One relationship when he was 21 and that fucked him up for life #but i like to think that it just keeps happening over and over again #at least edgeworth gets fixed and iris wasn't that bad but still the whole situation was so fucked up #why is he a magnet for toxic people he's just some spikey haired guy who wants to be nice to people most of the time #either Dahlia messed him up forever or he just keeps falling into toxic relationships and both of those options are so sad #anyway building on my aroace!phoenix bc of trauma headcanon #dahlia really said 'no one could ever love you' and phoenix was like 'okay what if I just never love again' and he did #putting the ace in ace attorney #local lawyer is deeply afraid of love but keeps falling into it bc its in his nature and it only ever hurts him lol #phoenix wright #ace attorney #asexual phoenix wright

[boxwinebaddie]

Uncle Nina, do they do HYH in the RM universe?

OOOOOH!!!!! it’s interesting that ur asking me this, anon.

— because i wanted to say No ( bc you know, they got their own distinct style scent thing going, the smile pendejo thing, like its all the same but its different )

However...

so me and the ~wife~ ( cue me saying HI! ;) louder than anyone else ) were talking abt the ravesey divorce para i was writing where kyle was getting all his messy jersey bad boy attack dog battle wounds patched up by pacifistic gentle punk rock angel medic!ravenstan...

and that...while he was bandaging kyle's knuckles up ( you know, before laying all those tiny hello kitty and care bear bandaids ) raven definitely tenderly kissed Each One of jersey's knuckles...AND THAT GAVE ME MENTAL PROBLEMS BC YOU KNOW HE DID!!! you know he was so gentle, attentive and Loving!!!! which given The Context!!!

AAAAAA!!!!!! -bangs my head in the car door screaming-

anYwAys!

but i just Know that jerseykyle, who is never surprised, never caught off guard, never vulnerable, does not fluster and NEVER blushes, was completely captivated. all wide-eyed and stuttering like

"wh-what? whaddaya—stan, what are you doin—“

then stan gets to the last knuckle, kisses it, puts his hand down & kyle, putting all the pieces together like the logician he is, is like...

"oh my god...ya still do that?

— from when we were little kids?"

and kyle squints, then shakes his head in disbelief like...

"'..cause ya mom, said that if you get hurt,

and you don't kiss it betta...It Won’t Heal Right."

and ravenstan just leans up and kisses jersey on the cheek — right where he has a cut — puts a hello kitty bandaid over it, and then...

in the softest, saddest, sentimental voice, smiles & says,

"Hope You Heal." :')

WHICHKHDSK RAAAAH!!! WHY WOULD I DO THIS!!!

i hate the ravesey divorce. i hope i fucking heal..

…bUT MAYBE NAUGHT WTF????!!!

-uncle nina, ~wheN WoRLDs cOLLidE~

#anyways #hell is a place #this directly mirrors a fb i was going to write but never did #where stan throws a ball on the playground in kgarten #it hits kyle in the face and stan is all freaked out like #did i hit you??? oh my god??? and kyle is like YEAH STUPID AND NOW IM GONNA HIT YOU winding up to Punch Him #but stan is still like hyperfixated like okay where did i hit you kyle? Exactly Where? #and hes like what the fuck do u think u fucken idiot right where the lump is forming in the middle of my gahdamn che-- #and stan jumps up on the bench where kyle is reading this gigantic greek mythology book yes its hades and persephone dont talk to me #and kisses kyle on the cheek and is like PhEw! i hope its in the right spot AND KYLE IS SHOOK LIKE dID YOU JUST KISS ME #and stan is like!!! ofc i did!!! my mom says that if you get hurt and dont kiss it better it wont heal right...so #*stan sigh and smile* I Hope You Heal :) <3 #and kyles hand is on his cheek all dizzy like...Me Too #ANYWAYS!!!! it was for pep but tbh now its applicable to rm #especially bc kgarten kyle had the jersey accent its canon #BUT YEAH WERE IN HELL I HATE THE RAVESEY DIVORCE BUT IF U WANT THE SAD HCS OF WHAT THEY WERE LIKE #BROKEN UP I HAVE THOSE #BUT UH I HOPE YOU HEAL WHAT THE FUCK THIS IS MY ACROSS THE NCUNIVERSE MOMENT #i'm gonna start screaming this is misery dude

[arundolyn]

i love thinking about how celica is just like. kinda The funniest fighting game character ever, without being a joke character like neco arc. she's hilarious unintentionally. she's extremely good at magic. she refuses to use it to hurt anyone ever even in self defense. she's a pacifist by choice but also because she's just really bad at hurting people even conceptually. i cannot imagine celica actually hitting anyone for any reason herself. that's what nine/ragna/minerva are for. her magical aptitude is extremely high and she's basically the only bitch that's ever been this good at healing magic on earth. she knows lightning magic but it's loud and scares her so we never see her use it. she's literally kind to everyone's detriment in that if she fights the literal god killing antagonist of the series she heals him anyway. she's constantly telling her big scary robot gf who's made to protect her to be nicer to people. her vibes are so good that she makes two of the main antagonists physically ill and nullifies bad vibes just by existing. and she's gay

#crow.txt #blazblueposting #and nine being her sister is always the funniest thing ever #like. by design. but its still so funny #extremely adept at magic in opposite directions. WORLD EXPLODE NOW vs ill heal ALL you fuckers. #shes so fucking funny. the fighting game character of all time. and she could not stand to hurt anyone ever even by accident #yeah yeah i know she has canonically kinda sorta maybe done things that count as fighting but like. very rarely #i dont think that one time she broke ragna and jin up when they were fighting in the middle of the hallway really counts #even if it was pre minerva #girl has never had to fight her own battles in her whole life #a squirrel could kick her ass and i dont even mean makoto. just a regular ass squirrel could kick her ass #and she would apologize

[perenlop]

am i being an ass by not liking the “blue’s raticate was killed by red” theory (at least when its done as if it objectively happened in canon)

#ik its for kicks but it kinda ruins their arc to me. blue is a smug little kid whos letting his famous granddad get to his head #and while oak still sucks at the end for rubbing salt into the wound its still part of blues arc of getting humbled #but when you toss in pokemon murder into that it changes the dynamic entirely. now it isnt a petty kid fight that gets kinda out of hand #its blues pokemon getting murdered and now ohhhh the player is HORRIBLE for hurting him and now its a revenge story #that ends with the murderer winning and the victim getting berated. and then in later games theyre buddy buddy #like. i think in fanworks im open to it being done with nuance (i actually like it in nuzlockes cause it fits the tone. im talking abt canon #but in the game its clear that he just tossed it in the pc and his interaction at lavender town is him being an insensitive kid #echoed voice