#lumberaxe

[blondephenobarbitol]

Ruth Fleming and Boy Jerry both die the same death at the hands of a monster they helped create but ya'll aren't ready for that conversation.

#the Abstinence Camp/NPMD parallels are something I could take about all day #ruth fleming #lauren lopez #boy jerry #jon matteson #npmd #nerdy prudes must die #abstinence camp #nmt #nmt2 #nightmare time 2 #hatchetfield #starkid #max jägerman #lumberaxe

[man-down-in-hatchet-town]

Brad Callahan, Quarterback

So Brad, instead of Max, being the Nighthawks QB is one of the more interesting minor details in Yellow Jacket. Of course a lot of time has passed since the timelines diverged, so it's perfectly possible that Max's family moved, or that the try-outs played out differently. But also could there be the Implication(TM) that Max is, you know... dead?

I highly doubt that a version of Nerdy Prudes played out in this timeline, since it's hard to see Steph and Pete going along with anything Grace says now that they're free of the Witch Wood and her reign of summer camp terror. But we still have Grace herself, who in this timeline possesses both untainted prudishness and an alliance with Little Jerry, and is already a bit mad with power by the time their senior year starts. And it's hard to imagine a version of Max who doesn't hit on Grace any chance he gets. So what if, to punish him for his carnal desires, the Grace of Nightmare Time 2 lured Max out into the woods (just as, a couple of branches over, she had him lured to the Waylon House) and let the Axe Man do his work on her behalf? Leaving Brad Callahan to step forward and torment Hannah with his enlarged ego and Justin Bieber haircut.

I know there's a lot of what-ifs in this, but we can't deny that the Max of the Nightmare Time 2 timeline is conspicuous in his absence. It just makes sense to me, that the Grace of Abstinence Camp would also rain demonic justice down on Max and call it divine. And I love the idea that Max and Grace are another pattern that echoes out across the web of timelines, like some twisted inversion of Paulkins or Lautski. Paul and Emma will always find each other, as will Steph and Pete. Lex and Ethan will always love each other and it will always be doomed. And Grace Chasity will oh-so-righteously send Max Jagerman to his demise. Even if we don't see it happen.

It's just so fucked up and therefore so very Them.

#like I get that they didn't have Max in Yellow Jacket because they weren't ready to cast him yet #but they knew who he was and that he was the QB #so very pointedly making Brad the QB instead of something different feels like a very pointed choice #also I just love the idea of being able to spot traces of other timelines and extrapolate moments of cause-and-effect between the lines #like you wouldn't be able to even theorize that Grace killed Max without seeing NPMD but then you put the two together and a story forms #exclusively within the implications #but still #we all know what the Langs have to say about implications #max jagerman #grace chasity #steph lauter #pete spankoffski #yellow jacket #brad callahan #nightmare time #abstinence camp #lumberaxe #Little Jerry #nerdy prudes must die #npmd #npmd spoilers #nerdy prudes must die spoilers #starkid #hatchetfield theory #hatchetfield

[infectedpaul]

homecoming

#dex says things #hatchetfield #abstinence camp #grace chasity #the hatchetfield axe man #lumberaxe #doodles

[thebugthatruinsyourpicnic]

PUPPETS IN THE NEW MUSICAL

#AFTER LUMBERAXE AND OTHO THIS CAN ONLY BE AWESOME LETS GOOOOOOO #starkid

[static-kills]

These posters in the nurse’s office remind me of the Chasitys and the Jerries

#starkid #hatchetfield #nightmare time #nightmare time 2 #abstinence camp #nerdy prudes must die #npmd #mark chasity #grace chasity #karen chasity #girl jeri #little jerry #boy jerry #Lumberaxe the mad woodsman

[richie-shitlips]

cosplaying boy jerry today hehe

#got my friends to be girl jeri and lumberaxe too #im at a convention but im not gonna say what con cause i dont want people to stalk me #boy jerry #hatchetfield #starkid #abstinence camp #nightmare time

[riverfelloff]

ive seen so many people wondering how starkid makes such good straight couples (lautski, paulkins, etc), but i think we really need to talk about this.

in a lot of todays modern media, shows centered around straight couples are heavily focused on the sexuality of it. while they may take a few episodes to flesh out a small pining story, starkid takes that to a whole new level.

let's look at lautski for example; our first introduction (I KNOW HE WAS IN TGWDLM AND BF I DONT CARE HE WASN'T TRULY INTRODUCED UNTIL NMT) to pete and steph was nmt2's episode, 'abstinence camp'. sure, we know that sexuality played a big part in this episode, but if you pay close attention, you know that nothing ever actually happens between steph and pete, they get caught by lumberaxe and then boy jerry before they can do anything.

before then, though, we get a back story of them meeting, it's shown how steph likes him for his little quirks and oddities, and how pete is happy that someone took the time to get to know that about him. before they join showers, they talk for what feels like forever, going back and forth.

however, in nerdy prudes must die AND the guy who didn't like musicals BOTH, neither of the couples even kiss, they get close but they don't. even npmd which centers around two high school seniors over the course of a few months, not even a peck on the cheek. HOWEVER, in scenes like the summoning, we can see steph and pete both trying to hide the other behind themselves.

in tgwdlm, paul sends himself into the theater to go take down the meteor so emma has some hopes of a life.

while it's implied that they love the other in a romantic sense, it's never outright said, because you don't make romantic bonds in the situations they were in!! they made the romantic connections before the actual plot of the musical gets started!! they're so close and care so much because of the shit they went through together!!

the reason why we're so captivated by straight couples from starkid is that they don't have to be couples to show how close they are and how much they care, because at the end of the day the lang brothers know that a bond is deepest when it's pure. if you care for someone enough, you'd do anything to keep them happy, even if it isn't with you.

#nerdy prudes must die #starkid #team starkid #npmd #peter spankoffski #joey richter #npmd spoilers #stephanie lauter #mariah rose faith #lauren lopez #jon matteson #emma perkins #paul matthews #the guy who didn't like musicals #tgwdlm #lautski #paulkins

[itsdefinitely]

Ello, I’m back! My lord demands another sacrifice. He has tainted many a soul, but the ones he hasn’t touched since forever because of their wood-dwelling, animalistic ways… the Metzgers.

(I imagine they have little monster features because the kids grew up in the woods, like Lumberaxe)

May I ask for a picture of them? It will give my king more vigilance to swallow them into the black and white.

twirls my hair.... hi bob metzger

#bob metzger #lars metzger #louie metzger #carl metzger #hatchetfield #id in alt text #definitely art #i know the brothers are adults in perky's buds but i needed to draw carl as a little emo boy. you understand

[peterfankoffski]

Steph in NPMD: I never wanted you anyway !!!! This is your fault Spankoffski!!!! You made me like you!!!!!!!!!!! >:(

Steph in Abstinence Camp: hey haha what if we fucked in the showers just to see if Lumberaxe is real,,jk jk,,,unless?

#team starkid #starkid #hatchetfield #hatchetverse #steph lauter #stephanie lauter #Lautski #NPMD #abstinence camp

[some-fantastic-kay]

if Ruth went to abstinence camp lumberaxe would hate her because she'd be super horny but he couldn't do anything about it because she wouldn't be able to get anyone to actually have sex with her

#starkid #ruth fleming #abstinence camp #nmt2 #npmd

[blondephenobarbitol]

I've been trying to figure out Jon Matteson Character Family Tree theory

after all of my limited research, here's what I've come up with:

Wallace is using his military powers to keep Lumberaxe hidden.

Richie is unhelpful to this cause and once told Pete "did you know my second cousin is the hatchetfield axe man."

'Uncle Paul' drives Gary's kids to school. One day they got in the car and there was a whole seven year old child back there also calling him 'Uncle Paul.'

Also Paul's been offering the kids money in exchange for dirt on Ted.

Gary knows one of his kids likes anime and the other likes superheroes but he can't really tell the difference. Paul has seen one episode of sailor moon and thinks he knows everything ("who do you kin? Who do you ship? You know who I kin? ... you.")

Gary also went out of his way to join the Wiggly cult because he knew it would piss off Jerry.

Daniel is surprisingly close with his cousin Wallace. It turns out having psychic abilities can be really useful to the Secretary of Defence.

Also Daniels been buying a lot of stuff recently with money that came from...the 'stock market.' He got himself some new roller blades and got Richie some anime pillows. Gary pretends not to notice but already is writing up a case for Daniel incase he gets in trouble.

Aunt Emma has secretly been buying Richie blue hair dye for like a year. Gary has no idea where it's all coming from, but he keeps finding the empty boxes and Richie's been wearing a lot of hats recently.

(Which really confuses him because he never told Richie he couldn't dye his hair.)

#jon matteson #starkid #hatchetverse #hatchetfield #paul matthews #gary goldstein #boy jerry #richie lipschitz #stopwatch #nightmare time #black friday musical #npmd #tgwdlm

[wardback]

Can we talk about Ted Spankoffski and how he is such an incredibly well written character??

Ted Spankoffski who chose to be a sleezeball after the love of his life chose someone else because thats the kind of guy he thought she wanted

Ted Spankoffski who accidentally killed that love of his life but doesn't know yet

Ted Spankoffski who walks past his future self whos insane and homeless and he doesn't know

Ted Spankoffski who years later is still scared of LumberAxe

Ted Spankoffski who loves his brother so much that he lashes out at his co worker for trying to save his daughter when he knows his own brother is dead

Ted Spankoffski who is in love with charlotte but she wont leave her dick of a husband

Ted Spankoffski who became a furry at the chance to get fucked

Ted Spankoffski who always dies

Ted Spankoffski who is doomed by the narrative

Ted Spankoffski who will never escape the bastards box

#i may have gotten a bit carried away #i love him so much #ted spankoffski #starkid #hatchetfield #time bastard #tnoy karaxis

[justarandombrit]

Imagining Boy Jerry sitting down after mutilating the body of one of the kids Lumberaxe killed, and, still covered head to toe in blood, taking out a notebook and pencil and writing down ideas for his ridiculous threats

#this has also lay dormant in my notes for months #go! be free post! #boy jerry #starkid #hatchetfield #team starkid #nightmare time #abstinence camp

[its-short-for-jackalope]

I love how Grace has a pattern of winning over/connecting with literal monsters—first Lumberaxe, then Max Jägerman—not because she's all good and pure of heart, but because there's something monstrous in her too.

#d'you think if she met Ezekiel and the nighthawks she would have won them over too #or would she have been too anti-weed and try to get them all sober lmao #OR... would they convince her to join the magic/psychic weed club? i mean we've already seen that she is somewhat flexible w/ her morals.. #jack jabbers #grace chasity #npmd #npmd spoilers #nerdy prudes must die #nerdy prudes must die spoilers #max jägerman #lumberaxe #abstinence camp #nmt2 #nightmare time 2 #nmt2 abstinence camp

[nono-bunny]

While listening to The Summoning first thing as I wake up, you know, as one does, I noticed something: the LiB mention being forever in their debt when talking about the price of the bargain.

Is it like... Maybe possible that THAT'S why Grace loses it at the end? She made a bargain and now has to serve the black book and its lords forever?

You can maybe even go farther and posit that also works for the alternative timelines, in some form: maybe Grace's understanding with Lumberaxe had more to do with the LiB than we could see!

Idk that I necessarily like? Believe this, but it definitely got me thinking! It's for sure more fun to just view Grace as being extremely vulnerable to getting swept away when given power, but like. Idk, what if? We know NPMD was written first, who's to say it's not also the first timeline to get reset? Tinky can probably see all of them at once so idk that his comments referring to Ted would necessarily place it later, because it does seem like Ted always goes back and get trapped in the past- the homeless man is for sure an entity in all the timeliness we know of!

In conclusion I got swept away in theories based on one fucking line of The Summoning again.... That song just seems to do that to people lol

#starkid #hatchetverse #nerdy prudes must die #npmd

[nobodysdaydreams]

Hatchetverse theory: As many have speculated, Mark Chasity from NPMD is also Mark from “Workin’ Boys” (but it’s more complicated than you might think…)

More thoughts under the keep reading, part of my #hatchetverse theory posts.

Despite the popularity of the “Mark Chasity is Mark from Workin’ Boys” headcanon, some Starkid fans will say that there is no way Mark Chasity can be Mark from the “Workin’ Boys” (even though Curt Mega plays them both), because even if the “playing football, majoring in business, and getting struck by lightning” thing happened in a different timeline than NPMD, it still doesn’t explain how he can have Grace as a daughter in Workin’ Boys if he died years before she was born.

I, however, would like to humbly offer the following alternatives:

A) In the Workin’ Boys timeline, Mark dies after Grace is born. Depending on how old Grace’s parents were when they had Grace and got married and how old Mark was when he died (possibly just out of college), this could imply that like little Jerry in “Lumberaxe”, Grace was also born out of wedlock and Mark and Karen had her in college before they got married (though this doesn’t necessarily have to be the case as they could have just gotten married really young, and honestly, I could see that with these two. Plus I want to see the drama that would unfold within the Workin’ Boys over who gets to be Mark’s best man).

B) I suppose it could also technically be possible Grace was never Mark’s daughter to begin with (she’s actually adopted or Karen had an affair), but nothing in NPMD implies either of these are true, and that wouldn’t explain why Grace would still have Mark’s last name in a Workin’ Boys timeline where he died before she was born (unless the family uses Karen’s last name or a new one they made up).

C) Like her daughter, Karen Chasity fell for a ghost. Or maybe they were already dating before Mark was struck by lightning. But in the NPMD timeline, after Mark dies, he (for some reason) keeps most of his normal personality and is just a normal friendly ghost. Like Max Jagerman’s ghost, people can see him, and he can interact with people. Maybe he has a personal vendetta or grudge against Henry which is why he haunts him in “Workin’ Boys”, but besides that, nothing changes. Mark is just a ghost now. Hence why Grace has a strong connection to the afterlife and is always warning people about hell (the black), and why the LIB are so focused on targeting her in NPMD: she’s technically “half-ghost”. Anyway, this could also possibly be part of why Mark wants to sell the Waylon Place (could be some afterlife business he needs to take care of).

D) In the NPMD timeline, Henry is struck by lightning and dies instead of Mark. I don’t think we see Henry or hear any mention of him in NPMD, so this is possible. In the “Workin’ Boys” timeline, Mark dies but still has Grace as his daughter due to any of the three reasons listed above.

#Hatchetverse theory #hatchetfield #hatchetverse #working boys #workin’ boys #mark chasity #grace chasity #karen chasity #henry hidgens #professor hidgens #starkid productions #starkid #nerdy prudes must die spoilers #team starkid #npmd #starkid npmd #npmd spoilers #the hatchetfield series #hatchetfield universe #nerdy prudes spoilers #nerdy prudes must die #hatchetfield musicals #nerdy prudes #grace chastity