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angelictaehyun · 4 years

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PAIRING: guardian angel!taehyun x fem!reader

GENRE: guardian angel au, soulmate au, fluff, angst

WC. 3,000+

WARNINGS: minor alcohol usage, mild language, feeling of loneliness

SYNOPSIS: Kang Taehyun, a sassy, young guardian angel, didn’t think anyone could be more of an absolute mess… boy, was he mistaken.

PART ONE || PART TWO || INTERLUDE || PART THREE

As you sobbed into your pillow while simultaneously inhaling ice cream, Taehyun was a world away, absentmindedly picking a piece of lint from his left wing. Not long after, he was standing in front of Soobin, an elder, receiving yet another assignment to none other than you, Little Miss Crying Mess, who’d already gone through an entire box of Kleenex in an hour.

His job was easy (and he’d be lying if he didn’t think himself a pro): silently look after you, keep you from harm, and do his absolute best to make you happy. But you would make that extremely difficult for him. When he glanced through your extensive profile, he didn’t think anyone could be more of an… in nicer terms...

Absolute fucking mess.

Like good God, yes, your boyfriend (ex-boyfriend, now) cheated on you, but that was a month and a half ago, and you weren’t even with him that long. So why could you not shut up and stop crying?

Taehyun wasn’t supposed to think this, guardian angel and all, but what was he supposed to do? You had raccoon eyes from your dried mascara and a pending noise complaint from your neighbor across the hall.

Funnily, the first time he ever saw you, he felt his jaw drop. Although you were possibly the ugliest crier he’d ever seen (and he’d been alive for a millennium and a half), he saw past that. He awed over your piercing eyes which held so much life in them; your adorably round face that was puffy from all your crying; your silky hair which he wanted to run a hand through.

He felt his heart yearn for you, like you were a magnet pulling him in.

In his first week on the job, he felt nothing but pity and sadness for you. The way you seemed so lifeless and drained had him motivated to mend your aching heart. Of course, you didn’t see or feel his presence; he worked tirelessly and quietly, doing small stuff to make you smile. For example, he’d slip a $20 in your pocket every once in a while for you to find when doing laundry (you never found them, and he was out $80 by the end of the week). He also gradually refilled your bare fridge with your favorite food, hoping you’d eat them and feel a semblance of joy, but you never touched it. Instead, each meal was a piece of toast (and occasionally a handful of Goldfish) and an entire bottle of wine.

He prayed for your liver.

His second week, he felt even more determined to see your beautiful smile. However, without his help, you had finally decided to take a shower and mosey your way back into society, a decision he was grateful for since you were beginning to resemble a dying gerbil. He accompanied you to your local coffee shop, following closely behind as you weaved between people on the sidewalk, oblivious to you, of course. The day was going well for you; the barista accidentally sized up your order, the jazz band in the park played your favorite song, and you felt the warm sun on your face for the first time in a long while. That is, until you ran into an old friend and found out she recently became engaged.

He practically saw your flip switch as you plastered on a fake smile and acted as if you were fine. When you finally left, you couldn’t even make it halfway to your apartment before you were breaking down once more.

His third week was when he decided to take on a more drastic measure. When he re-read your profile to find a list of your core memories, he realized you had a lot of love for snow and snowfall. So he made it snow.

In the middle of June.

Nonetheless, he completely ignored the fact that it was a logistical nightmare, thinking it was a perfect idea, sure to bring a smile to your gorgeous face. When you woke up the next morning, feeling extra chilly, Taehyun felt giddy, especially as you moped over to your window and watched the crystalline snow fall from Heaven. He felt proud, especially when he noticed a single tear cascade down your cheek; he believed he overwhelmed you with such happiness, you cried. But when he heard you mumble something like a ‘Yeonjun loved snow,’ and crawl back into bed, he widened his eyes, plopped himself on your desk, and gave up. Not only did he have to deal with a crying you (again), he also had the entire city population wondering why the hell it was snowing in the middle of summer.

Most of his fourth week was spent on your floor, playing with your dog, devising a new plan to cheer you up, and waiting for you to wake, as you spent most of your day sleeping… though he preferred you asleep since it meant you weren’t crying. Rather than feeling that pity and empathy from his first day on the job, each time you shed a tear, he found himself growing more and more irritated, so when you cried again for the eighth time that week, he had enough. He undid his glamour which kept him hidden and made himself visible to you. He fixed himself a sandwich, sat on your desk, and waited patiently for you to notice his presence.

Much like any sane person, when you saw a random, unknown boy aggressively eating a sandwich and watching you from less than six feet away, you screamed bloody murder (which was the reason behind the second noise complaint from your neighbor). You scrambled to the opposite side of your bed and balled your hand into a fist while the other reached for a firm, weighty object, as if that was going to protect you from what you believed was about to be certain death.

“STAY BACK!”

“Y/N, Y/N, it’s okay, it’s okay. Let me explain myself,” he tried reasoning as he slowly approached you as one would approach a flighty deer. You reached for every pillow you could and hurled them his way. As he busied himself dodging them, you sprinted from your bedroom to the front door, but just as you reached for the doorknob, he appeared from literal thin air in front of you, making you scream even louder.

He grabbed your shoulder in an attempt to calm you but that just heightened your fear. You thrashed around in an attempt to escape, ignoring how his grip on you was outrageously strong.

Almost inhuman.

When you finally took in his massive, iridescent wings, a small part of your brain put it all together. The other part of your brain, however, was on fire and assumed he was a nutjob hellbent on killing you.

“Shh, it’s okay,” he whispered, letting go of your shoulder.

You made another failed attempt at reaching for your doorknob. This time, he grabbed your hand.

“I’m not here to kill you.”

Your eyes narrowed and your body relaxed (barely).

“My name is Taehyun and I’m an angel. Your angel, actually.” He spun around, showcasing his golden wings.

You let out an inappropriate snort, which was quickly replaced by a choke as he began moving closer toward you. Your body stilled and you screwed your eyes shut.

You felt nothing but the cool tip of his wing brush against your arm as he moved by you. After a long minute of silence, you took a deep breath to calm yourself and hesitantly opened one eye, just to be met with the sight of him comfortably spread across your couch. He mindlessly picked at the fabric of your favorite throw pillow and threw a leg across your coffee table. He seemed all too familiar with your apartment, which was a frightening realization. You watched him with bated breath as he merely glanced over your trembling figure, tilting an eyebrow. He seemed disinterested… almost bored.

You shuffled behind your kitchen counter, making sure to put plenty of distance between you both, and once you were sure there was enough space, you took him in. He was breathtaking, to say the least. His perfectly pink lips, razor-sharp jaw, defined nose, bright eyes, and high cheekbones, it was like he was sculpted by God himself. You must’ve stared too long because you saw his lips lift into a smirk. You shifted your eyes away and folded your arms across your chest defensively, “Fine, I’ll play along. Why should I believe you’re an angel?”

He tipped his head to the side and narrowed his eyes, “Are you blind? I literally have wings.”

“Which could be fake for all I know.”

He scoffed in disbelief, “I’ll have you know, these are most certainly real. Excuse me.”

You silently leaned back against the counter with a look of disinterest and pursed lips. He sighed before turning around, allowing you to see his wings begin to glow and suddenly disappear in a flash of bright light. You were left gaping as your mind ran wild, though only a single thought consumed you, “Why do I need a guardian angel? What could I possibly need one for?”

“Well, your life… um, it’s kind of ass,” he replied as if it were obvious.

Now it was your turn to be offended, “Excuse me? Who the hell are you to tell me that?”

“Your guardian angel?! A-are you deaf? Why else would I be here? You think I’ve enjoyed watching you mope around your apartment for the past month? You shower, like, once a week, and honestly, you look like a soggy rat. All you do is cry and never shut up, I can’t believe you’re even still capable of forming a tear! Actually, aside from when you’re asleep, this is the longest I’ve seen you go without breaking down sobbing!” he scolded as you stood in your kitchen, insulted by his harsh rant.

“They why stay? Go find someone else to bother, it’s not like I want you here anyway!”

You picked at a hangnail and anxiously nibbled on your bottom lip. You didn’t even know why you were so offended; he was a complete stranger. As if he knew, he shuffled over to you, close enough to reach for your hand, and surprising you both, you didn’t pull away.

“Look, I’m sorry, but like I said, your life has been hard. When your mother passed away, you had to live on your own as soon as you graduated high school, and now you can barely afford college because all of your money goes to rent. Then your boyfriend does what he did? Not to bring up old scars, but you need all the support you can get. That’s what I’m here for.”

You yanked your hand away and scoffed. ‘Not to bring up old scars,’ he says, bringing up every single scar.

“I’ve been doing perfectly fine on my own. I don’t need your help and I especially don’t need you lurking around. Please leave.” You pointed at your door before sulking back into your room.

“You’re getting my help whether you like it or not!”

That was the last thing you heard before you slammed your door.

· ──────────────────── ·

The following week was unpleasant, to say the least. Each and every morning, you woke to his annoyingly handsome yet smug face as he sat with his feet kicked up on your desk… and this morning was no different.

“Good morning, Sunshine! You know, you’re quite the deep sleeper, your heinously loud snoring couldn’t even wake you… but it definitely woke the dead,” he cheerfully remarked, plastering on a self-satisfied smirk. You ignored him and pushed your way by his tall frame on your way to your bathroom sink. Much like the week before, he appeared from thin air and perched himself on your counter. Despite your lack of response, he continued, “We should do something fun today, maybe go get some sun? You’re looking a little… lifeless.”

He examined your body from head to toe. If you didn’t know any better, you would’ve thought he seemed concerned, but he masked it well with his smugness.

“I don’t want to go anywhere with you,” you mumbled hoarsely.

“Then don’t go with me! Call a friend or go out by yourself, I really don’t care. Just please get out,” he whiny begged. He hated seeing you cooped up in your small, dinky apartment. He wished for you to experience life again, and he especially wished to see the light return to your eyes and the bright smile he knew you kept hidden.

“No.”

Once you finished brushing your teeth, you climbed back into your warm bed and scrolled on your old phone. He clenched his jaw at your stubbornness, trying his best to stay calm. It was only 9:32 AM and you had already managed to piss him off. He knew you were headstrong, he didn’t need to read a profile on you to know that; just one day around you and he already picked up on your obstinance. He jumped off the countertop and climbed onto your bed to hover over your body. His breath fanned your nose as he trapped your body between him, wings draping over you both like a blanket. You were shocked and once again, left breathless just by being in his proximity, and you could feel your pulse rapidly increasing as he glanced down to your lips.

He leaned closer and closer, and you nearly closed your eyes, until he snatched your phone from your hand.

“You’re not getting this back until you go outside and do something. Anything. For the love of God,” he pleaded, pulling back quickly. The sudden lack of warmth snapped you out of your haze.

“Oh my God! Gimme!” you helplessly whined.

“Are you five? You know what you have to do to get your phone back.” He slapped your hand away as you tried to steal it back.

You refrained from punching him, instead narrowing your eyes as he did the same. You both had an unspoken contest until you broke first. His harsh gaze pierced you; he was too intimidating.

“Fine,” you snapped, making your way from bed to get ready for the day.

· ──────────────────── ·

There was a small, quiet beach near your childhood home you loved visiting every once in a while. The tranquility of the ocean lapping at the shore always provided you with a feeling of peace.

Until now.

You had chosen to go out by yourself, much like Taehyun had suggested, but your plan quickly faltered when he reminded you that he would be with you regardless, either glamoured or visible. Seeing as you didn’t necessarily like the idea of him invisibly lurking around, you opted to have him visibly by your side. You’d rather see his judgment rather than feel it from afar.

So there you were, watching him smother an obnoxious amount of your expensive sunscreen onto his face as if he were a human and not a supernatural being that’s completely unaffected by UV. It’d been a week since he came into your life, or at least made his presence known, and he was already a pain in your ass.

“I have to maintain my cover somehow.”

“What?” You didn’t know what cover he was trying to maintain, his pesky wings were hidden, and overlooking his outright godly features, he looked perfectly human.

He did a poor job of rubbing the sunscreen into his skin and for the first time since meeting him, you felt a smile creep on your face. He looked like an idiot. You almost let him be since you were so amused, but you helped him out anyway. Standing on the balls of your feet and cupping his face, you began smoothing the sunscreen on. He held your waist, holding you steady, and you felt nervous from the proximity but you did your best to conceal it. He silently studied you, thinking you looked incredibly adorable as you focused on your small task, your eyes narrowing in concentration and your teeth biting into your soft lips.

He couldn’t help the way his mouth tugged into a small smile.

“All done! Now you don’t look like a ghost,” you mused.

“Thank you,” he snorted, releasing his firm grip. Instinctually, he kept himself hovered around you, though, never really creating a noticeable distance.

You were thankful he pushed you to leave your apartment, but you knew you could never tell him that. You just knew he was the type to constantly bombard you with ‘I told you so’, and you’d never hear the end of it.

The rest of the day, he watched as you laid on your blanket and basked in the sunlight, eventually getting up to walk the shoreline. You kept yourself occupied as you searched the sand for pretty shells and dainty rocks, and Taehyun forced himself to keep his distance, not wanting to disturb your peace. This was the calmest he had seen you since he was first assigned and he felt so grateful; he didn’t show it but he couldn’t bear seeing you in pain. Yes, your crying was growing extremely irritating, and yes, the pile of used Kleenex beside your bed was beginning to disgust him, nonetheless, he wanted to see you happy.

When you stopped to blankly stare at the vast ocean, he could’ve sworn he could feel your pain, the way your heart ached, the way your mind was heavy with despair. The pain he felt wasn’t one of heartbreak though, rather… loneliness.

In fact, all of your pain stemmed from feeling completely alone.

He quickly made his way over to your side and grabbed your much smaller hand in his—he wanted you to know you weren’t alone anymore. You didn’t turn to him, rather you kept your eyes trained on the sun beginning to set on the horizon. You leaned your head on his shoulder and closed your eyes, relishing in his warmth and the crisp tide washing over your feet.

For reasons he still had yet to decipher, he yearned to always be by you, protecting you, making no harm ever came your way again. He tried shaking off the feeling as doing his job properly, but something in the back of his mind told him this was different.

Something about you was different.

And he could quite literally feel it in his heart.

Chapter Two >>

#taehyun x reader #taehyun imagines #txt writing #txt imagines #txt x reader #choi soobin #choi yeonjun #choi beomgyu #kang taehyun #huening kai #hueningkai #txt #tomorrow x together #txt fluff #kpop imagines #my angel

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losmonteslejanos · 3 years

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The guilt of relief.

The last part of the main trilogy of guilt is a bit different. I don’t carry the same guilt for Madrina as I do for Duli and my grandma. While my grief for Madrina cuts deeper, it does not weigh heavily on on my conscience. I am grateful for that.

My guilt with Madrina stems from two very specific things I did: not going to her when my gut told me I should and for wishing her dead. Let me explain.

I NEVER wanted her to die. I wanted her to be free from herself, from who she had become, even if that meant I had to lose her. She was a prisoner and she desperately needed to break free. That was very evident. But I need to make it very clear that I never actually wanted her to die. I wanted her to be free. She deserved that.

Prison began around nine to ten years ago. There wasn’t a set date that her sentence began and we didn’t exactly know what was happening as it happened, but it’s easy to recognize now. She’s about 86 years old at this point and has only been retired for a couple years (she was actually insane, I know). Retiring took a toll on her. After she left her workplace (where she had worked for the same family for about 45 years) she slowly began to change. The change in her routine must’ve been too much for her. It had kept her sharp but now she was getting duller by the day.

It was absolutely terrible at first. She was hyper aware that she couldn’t function like she used to and she couldn’t stand it. Her entire life she had been super independent and the slightest feeling of incompetence frustrated her to no end. I had always heard that Madrina was cold; that she was mean - but I had never experienced that. Alzheimer’s made sure I met that side of her.

She became a different person. Looking back, I know she was just hurting. She couldn’t understand why her body and mind were failing her - they had carried her for such a long time. She hated herself; that part was clear. But she took it out on me. I was an easy target for her and she said some pretty nasty things to me during that time. That was the first time I wished her dead.

This version of her was ugly. I hated her. I hated that I lived with her. I pleaded with my mother on several occasions to move out. I hated how she made me feel. I resented her but I knew this wasn’t who she really was - I knew her, and this wasn’t it. But I wanted my suffering to stop. Removing her from the equation would do that.

This phase of her illness lasted about a year. She put me through a lot that year, but looking back I can’t recall a single hurtful thing she said. It didn’t matter in the long run. It was never about hurting me, anyway. It was her cry for help when she needed us most.

Things got better after that. Her personality changed again but this was bearable for me...though not so much for my mother. She had been okay during the mean and hurtful phase of Madrina because she hadn’t been the target, but BOY, did she get her day in court. At this point Madrina had a problem with authority. Her independent self could not handle being told what to do and taking orders was not in her vocabulary. My mother only wanted what was best for her so this caused CONFLICT. I often tried to mediate, for I probably understood Madrina better than anyone else, but had the same goals my mother did. This didn’t always end well for me. But I did it anyway because I loved her so much. I spent many meals in tears at the table alone with Madrina feeding her like she was a toddler who refused to eat...and I’d do it all again.

Then came the best and the worst part. The part where I couldn’t have been more conflicted. The part where she surrendered. She eventually gave in. She allowed us to take care of her. She was super sweet...like, more than ever before. It was a new version of her and we loved it. She was funny, she was playful, she was loving, she was kind. She was still difficult at times (some things never change) but she was gracious about it. Most of the time she was just lovely to be around. Some things she just wouldn’t waiver on, but that was to be expected with her. Those times were frustrating but completely bearable. I could live with this version of her forever.

But then came the ugly part, because you can’t have rainbows without a little rain. Her memory was shot. She remembered her childhood but not what happened five minutes ago. None of it made sense. Every time she was reminded that a loved one had died was like a fresh wound for her and, as someone who has known grief, that KILLED me. I couldn’t bear to see her live through that pain over and over and over and over. So we lived in an alternate reality for a long time. One where people were out at the store instead of six feet underground. We kept her happy this way. I wished her dead so she could be free of the confusion. I can’t even imagine what went on in her brain. What she remembered was like a box of chocolates - you never knew what you were going to get. But at least she remembered us.

In my mind I had grieved her already. She was such a shell of herself that I had mourned that part of her that I had already lost and her physical body didn’t seem as important. I was so wrong about that. She was such a security blanket for me that losing her physically destroyed me. I feel so guilty for asking God to take her, to release her. I had to have known what I was asking for, but I didn’t understand the repercussions of getting it.

It was never with malicious intent that I prayed for this, and boy did I pray for this. It was never to make my life easier or free myself from her. It’s because she was miserable. Even when she didn’t say it, I could tell. She never wanted to live this long or age this much. This was never her intention. She never wanted to be a burden on anyone - and even if she didn’t believe it, she never was. I know she loved us and wanted to be with us, but she had been ready for a long time.

April 26, 2019 she gave some signs. She was in Spain at the time and I had called my aunt to see how she was doing. My aunt made it clear that she felt Madrina’s days were numbered. That didn’t completely faze me because we’d had that thought several times over the past few years. But then, something felt different. Something told me to go to her. I contemplated quitting my job and spending the rest of her days with her. I thought about buying a plane ticket to go see her for a long weekend. But then I thought logically. The old her would’ve been pissed if I quit my job. I didn’t have the money on hand to just buy a plane ticket that day. I decided to wait it out. I went to PetSmart, impulsively bought two gerbils to boost my serotonin, and went home. It weighed heavy on my mind but I tried to continue living my life and made plans to try and visit her over the summer. I’ve lived to regret that decision. She died two weeks later. I feel that guilt for not going to her, when my gut told me I should. I know she died knowing she was loved and cherished and that gives me a sense of peace. I feel the guilt of not seeing her one last time but I know we did right by her.

We laughed, we cried, we fought; but most importantly we loved and the memories we have with her we will carry with us forever. After all these years of good times and bad times, she can rest now - we can all rest now. (3/3)

“Guilt is toxic. Reliving the same mistake over and over again is torture. Constantly criticizing and blaming yourself is bullying. Break free of this cycle. Reflect. Learn. Grow. Love yourself. Forgive yourself.”

#loss grief grieving heal healing personalgrowth growing personalblog

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gukyi · 7 years

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push your buttons | ksj

⇒ summary: you like dogs, and lucky for you, a cute boy in the park happens to have one that’s taken quite the liking to you.

⇒ high school!au

⇒ pairing: seokjin x female reader

⇒ word count: 2k

⇒ genre: fluff

⇒ warnings: dogs!!!!!

⇒ a/n: this is unedited, because i don’t have time to edit these days (and i’m also too lazy). also, i’m a cat person. requested by anon!

You’ve never exactly been the luckiest person, so to speak. Take, for example, when you were five, and the speaker who came to visit your school was giving out magnets and stickers to every kid they saw, and when you all returned to your classrooms from the auditorium, you were the only one without any sort of goodie in your hands. Or, when you were in middle school, in the cafeteria, rushing to finish some math homework you totally forgot about the night before, and the exact second the sheet fell on the floor, the janitor spilt his bucket full of mop water all over the cafeteria, absolutely drenching everything in its wake and rendering you homework-less. Case and point, you’re not particularly lucky, and your love for animals that your parents happen to be incredibly allergic to is no exception.

So you can’t have a dog. Or a cat. Or even, like, a gerbil. Every single one of them makes your parents sneeze like crazy, noses puffy and voices groggy, and you’re not sure if it’s the shedding, or the scent, or maybe just genetics, but there is no mercy for a pet in your household.

Which is exactly where the local adoption center comes into play. If you can’t get the pets to come to you, you’ll just have to go to the pets yourself. Good thing the shelter was looking for volunteers when you Googled their website. Sure, they’re not your pets, but you love and cherish them all the same, and—shh! Don’t say anything—you maybe sometimes hope that they won’t get adopted, just so you can keep seeing them. But you didn’t hear that from me.

It’s especially handy volunteering there, because smack dab in between your residence and the shelter is the local dog park, and if you said you didn’t get distracted every time you strolled past, you’d be a motherfucking liar.

Today is no different, especially because it’s off-leash day (!!!) and there is nothing more beautifully heartwarming than having a casual walk through a park and then suddenly being surprised by a dog, excited to see a new face in its life. You don’t even own a dog, but you’d rather backflip into a volcano than miss off-leash day.

You’ve given yourself an hour maximum to spend in the dog park before you have to go to your volunteering, an hour of puppy licks and frisbee tosses galore. Time well spent, if you’re being honest.

Setting foot in the dog park on off-leash day is like setting foot in the most wonderful alternate universe ever. It’s your dream world, seeing happy dogs bounding around hills with tennis balls in their mouths. Some of the owners even know you as a regular visitor, and their dogs do too, sniffing you like you’re a familiar being in their worlds, a friend.

You’ve taken to lying down in the dog park—mind you, where there is a clear patch and not a doggie bag in sight—and letting the dogs come to you, getting wonderfully surprised by the ones that you recognize, like Pickle, the German Shepherd who acts more like a Corgi, or Lansdale, who only likes being scratched on his lower back, or even Marshmallow, this tiny little brown Dachshund whose name strangely fits its personality, even if it doesn’t fit its physical appearance. Today, it’s none of them, and your eyes are closed as you feel little paws stepping on your chest, settling down on the the squish of your tummy. When you peek your eyes open, it’s a little white dog, dirty brown on the edges like it’s been perpetually rolling in mud.

“Hello,” you say excitedly, reaching out to let it sniff you. The dog presses its wet nose on your pointer finger, though, judging by its position on your stomach, it’s already made its decision.

“Oh God, oh my God,” you hear, and strangely enough, the voice doesn’t belong to a middle-aged mother, or a jogging man in his twenties, or a friendly senior citizen, like most of the regulars here. “I am so sorry.”

When you look up, it’s a boy, and he’s got this awfully apologetic look on his face as his eyes move from your face, to his dog, to where its sitting. He begins to come in focus more, the blood rushing to your brain as you sit up and regretfully force the dog off your chest, and you recognize him.

He goes to your school, and from the look on his face, he recognizes you as well.

“I’m so sorry, Jjanggu really doesn’t know how to control himself,” the boy says, and you know him, you know him, of course you know him, but what’s his name? “I hope he didn’t bother you.”

Might as well not dwell on it now. “No! No, I love dogs, I come here all the time just for them, it’s fine, I promise,” you assure the boy, reaching down and petting his pup right behind the ear, the sweet spot for any and every canine (except Lansdale). “It’s not a problem.”

“Really, though, I’m still sorry he totally just walked all over you like that,” the boy insists.

“He’s cute, I don’t mind,” you promise. “What did you say his name was, again?”

“Jjanggu,” the boy says, beaming as he looks down at his dog, clearly proud of him.

“And what did you say yours was?”

It’s not flirting. You swear, it’s not flirting. For the most part. Alright, so it’s a little bit of flirting, but it’s not like you’re throwing yourself at him. The best way to a man’s heart is through his pet, anyway.

The boy opens his mouth to respond, but it looks like the words get lodged in his throat, not ready to come out. “Uh, I—um,” he stutters. “I didn’t.”

“So, why don’t you tell me?”

“Me?” He asks, seemingly surprised that you’re still talking to him. “I’m Seokjin.”

“I’m Y/N,” you say, holding a hand out for him to shake. He does, firmly, like he’s promising you something, an offer you can’t refuse. When you lean down and hold out your hand in front of Jjanggu, he gives you a paw to shake as well. “You come here often, Seokjin?”

“I didn’t used to, but I think I might visit a bit more than normal now,” Seokjin says. Oh, so he will flirt with you back? “If Jjanggu gets to see cute girls, of course.”

You snort a little, amused by his banter. “Oh, yes. Jjanggu deserves that.”

“You go to school around here?” asks Seokjin, even though it’s evident that the both of you have definitely seen each other around the hallways.

“As a matter of fact, I do,” you say, checking the time. “I gotta blast, but I’ll see you around?” You ask, smiling.

Seokjin leans down to pick Jjanggu up before shooting you a charming grin. “Make time for me, won’t you?”

---

And make time for him you do. Maybe it’s the mutual appreciation you have for dogs that does it, or the convenient location that the park lies in, or it might even be that sneaking little feeling that sits at the bottom of your heart, the one that gets all disgustingly warm and fuzzy whenever you’re around him, but you can’t seem to get enough.

It’s nice, hanging out with him, walking Jjanggu around the park together when it’s not an off-leash day, keeping a relatively close eye on him as he bounds around the hills when it is. Before this, you didn’t know Seokjin well, only knew him as another boy in some of your classes, rolling with a different crowd. But when you and Seokjin meet in the park to walk his dog around, you don’t talk about that one test you failed or the awful woodworking teacher who doesn’t even know how to remove a splinter. School isn’t a factor in this equation, even if it’s where you see each other most often. Plus, Jjanggu loves you, and if that’s not reason enough for you to spend time with Seokjin, then you don’t know what is.

---

Seokjin’s all cheesy pick-up lines and dramatic gestures when you sit with him on the grass, watching Jjanggu play happily with the other dogs on the last day of school, which just so conveniently happens to be an off-leash day. Seokjin’s a year older than you, which means he’s graduating and you won’t get to have these dog-park-not-a-date-dates much more, so you might as well spend the rest of the day together.

“What’s gonna happen with Jjanggu when you go off to university?” You wonder aloud, fingers plucking the grass from their roots.

“I don’t know. I’ll probably have my parents walk him, or something,” Seokjin replies, shrugging as Jjanggu finds a new friend to tussle with, sniffing the other dog’s ass before determining he is an acceptable pal.

“I can’t believe I won’t get to see him anymore,” you whine, already nostalgic for the first day you saw him, a little white ball with brown edges, an apologetic boy running not far behind. You rest your head in the crook of Seokjin’s neck, and you sit there, swaying back and forth ever so slightly.

“When I come back, we can meet up at the dog park again,” Seokjin promises. “Oh! I forgot, I have something for you.”

You lift your head up, skeptical as Seokjin begins to fish in the pockets of the navy blue blazer he wears, all broad shoulders and crisp lines. “Why? You’re the one graduating, not me.”

“Here, alright,” he says, situating himself so he’s sitting across from you, rather than next to you. “Look at me.”

“I’m looking.”

It’s quite the view.

“What do you notice that’s odd?”

“What is this, Spot The Difference?” You inquire, bewildered at what Seokjin is asking of you. Nonetheless, you begin searching, eyes scanning through his tussles of caramel brown hair, to the little silver hoops in his ears, along the seams of his well-fitting blazer, down to the uneven laces of his shoes. That blazer is really doing a lot of things for Seokjin, and all of them are good. You can’t take your eyes off of it, that itching feeling under your skin that’s telling you that you’re missing something here. “Oh, come on, give me a hint.”

“It’s on my body,” Seokjin supplies, like that’s any help.

“I meant a hint that I can use, Seokjin!” You exclaim, pushing him back slightly, open blazer blowing in the breeze. “Oh no! One of your buttons popped off!”

Seokjin looks down at where you’re pointing, his second button leaving nothing but a loose piece of thread in its wake.

“Maybe if we search the grass, we could find it.”

“Y/N,” Seokjin says, hands coming to rest on your wrists as they begin to feel through the grass. “It’s alright.”

“It looks awful, Seokjin,” you tell him.

“I’m insulted,” Seokjin says, a hand over his chest as he looks at you, pretending to be offended at your brutally honest comment. The expression is just enough to distract you as his hand darts back to his pocket, fist curled around something. “Hold your hand out.”

“Why?” You ask, following his order without even trying to get a response beforehand.

He gently takes your rest in his one hand, placing his fist in your palm as you feel a small object drop into it, hiding in the crevices of your fingers. When he removes his hand, what’s left is a small navy blue button, akin to the ones stitched onto his blazer.

“Your button?” You ask, puzzled at the endearing but somewhat pointless present in your palm.

“It’s closest to my heart,” Seokjin muses, and if that isn’t the cheesiest, cutest thing you’ve ever heard come out of his mouth.

“That’s so… sappy,” you declare, rolling the button between your fingers.

“How about this,” Seokjin says, a proposal on his lips. “How about next time we walk Jjanggu in the park, it can be an official date, instead of just an outing.”

“I like that idea,” you say, smiling as you feel yourself leaning into him, eyes focused on his lips. You tilt your head in a little more, lips hardly a centimeter away from each other’s when a bark sounds out and you’re suddenly tackled, falling on your back. Jjanggu’s on top of you, oblivious to the fact that he just totally interrupted a moment between you and Seokjin, giving you this sloppy kiss all over your cheeks.

“I think Jjanggu likes that idea, too,” Seokjin says, chuckling as he stretches a hand over to rub Jjanggu’s stomach.

And lying here, Seokjin’s heart practically resting in between your fingers, you decide that maybe you’re unlucky with most things, but, you suppose, you have a little bit of luck on your side when it comes to cute boys with dogs that walk around missing the second button on their blazer.

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