#pls tho i need more units so i dont have to listen to those fucking kids. where's the awoo guy. i think id prefer him over this

[orcelito]

Me starting fe engage rolling my eyes at animated sequences, hating the voice acting + the overdramatic sprite animations, being taken out of the battle I was enjoying to watch more animated sequences & being like "just Let Me Fight! The Fuck?????"

In other words my engage game is going swimmingly, it seems

#speculation nation #i have it set to hard mode bc ive learned i enjoy fire emblem games more on hard #since i like fire emblem for the tactics to start with. not much worth to having battles be way too easy #anyways im like barely started. dont rly like the summoning system. feels cheap + marth deserves to not have to deal with this crap #i chose the female protag bc ???? idk smth about the male protag pissed me off more #SORRY FOR BEING A HATER BTW hfkhsjf i feel so mean rn to ppl to like this game #listen i love fire emblem. and i think i will have plenty of fun with this game once i get used to it. #but i swear hearing those two kids yelling when she woke up (literally why do they have KIDS appointed to watch her???) #made me just Grimace. i really do not like their voices. #the protag's voice is... okay... i like it more when she sounds confident. the sniveling 'uhmm... and you are...?' just annoys me #the knight dude's voice is actually the most tolerable. im not a big fan of his design but it could be worse. #at least i dont end up wanting to rip out my ears when he talks. #pls tho i need more units so i dont have to listen to those fucking kids. where's the awoo guy. i think id prefer him over this

[toadprose]

An Exchange of Endearments;

The one where a stolen phone united two people who were destined to meet. A story told through text messages.

☎ w.c: 3,1k

☎ pairing: ghost x soap // simon riley x john mactavish

☎ rating: pg

☎ archive of our own: link here

☎ genre: silliness, humor, fluff

☎ warnings: mention of an inappropriate app but only by name

☎ author's note: hello :) i wanted to experiment with writing a story in a different format. it's mainly just silly. there's only 3 chapters rn. i'm testing out different ways to end this fic but there will definitely be more chapters to come. thank you for reading! ALSO!! the plan was to have tho WHOLE fic like those imessage screenshots but they take too long to make and i am lazy so pls just use ur imagination

Soap: dumbass. how many times u gonna drop ur phone at exfil? this is the last time i’m saving ur new number, gaz. venmo me $6 for the tea or i’ll give it to that hot dog cart guy.

???: ?

???: Wrong number.

Soap: fuck. sorry, lad.

Soap: wait. this is gaz’s number. what the hell?

Soap: how did u get this phone

???: I stole it from a drunk guy in a bathroom.

Soap: …

Soap: what the fuck, man?

???: I think he left his phone there.

???: And I need one.

???: This works out fine.

Soap: where tf r u, i wanna yell at u

Soap: and ask if u want any help getting back home. were u drinkin too?

???: Why would I tell a complete stranger where I am?

Soap: fair enough.

???: Why do you care about the well-being of me, a phone thief?

Soap: im a big brother. always looking out for the little guys. even when theyre stealing phones.

???: I am not little. 

Soap: ok then, big guy.

Soap: i know we just met and all, but maybe take ur new phone and get somewhere safe tonight. dont sleep on a park bench. or a strangers bed.

???: Who do you think I am, a hobo? I have a very nice home.

Soap: then why tf did u steal a phone in the first place?

???: Because I wanted one.

???: I did not have any money on me.

Soap: well now u do, so buy a fucking phone, mate.

???: But this one works fine.

Soap: and im not sure that the owner agrees with u

???: He will live.

Soap: not the point.

???: If he can afford this type of phone, he can afford another one.

Soap: not my argument

???: Are you saying I should buy my own phone?

Soap: yeah. thats literally what im saying.

???: But why, when this one is free.

Soap: jesus christ

???: And you can Venmo me the money instead.

Soap: ill venmo u my foot up ur arse.

???: I will pay you back.

???: You do not have to be mean.

Soap: how did u make me a dick in this conversation. i was trying to help.

???: Well, I still have the phone.

Soap: yea. but at what cost.

Soap: u got a name, phone thief?

???: Ghost.

Soap: is that ur name or are u hiding.

Ghost: Yes.

Soap: ok im calling the cops

Ghost: Please do not.

Ghost: I can explain.

Ghost: I can be normal.

Soap: not what i asked.

Soap: im joking. im not a cop.

Soap: but seriously, ghost. what the hell are u doing?

Ghost: Living.

Soap: not a lot of living happening in the bathroom of a bar, lad.

Ghost: I needed a new phone.

Ghost: And the bathroom was very clean.

Soap: thats it. im gonna go find u.

Soap: if u wont listen to reason then at least give me ur location.

Ghost: I would prefer if you didn't.

Ghost: I don't really enjoy meeting new people.

Soap: ur stuck with me now. i wanna meet the man who stole my mate's phone in a public restroom.

Ghost: Please, don't.

Soap: too late, i got u in find friends.

Ghost: WHAT

Ghost: WHY

Ghost: HOW

Ghost: WHEN

Ghost: DO NOT

Soap: relax, im joking. 

Ghost: This is not funny.

Soap: a lil bit funny.

Ghost: Fuck you.

Ghost: Do not text this number again.

Soap: too bad.

Soap: this is my new favorite thing.

Ghost: This is not an entertainment device.

Soap: u made it into one when u took the phone.

Ghost: I should have stolen your phone.

Soap: yea. u prolly should have.

Soap: maybe u still can.

Ghost: No, thank you.

Soap: im so glad to hear ur manners kicked in at the end there.

Soap: i feel better knowing ur not a total dick.

Ghost: That's not what my mom tells me.

Soap: oh god.

Ghost: Sorry.

Ghost: I didn't mean to send that.

Ghost: It was a joke.

Ghost: A bad one.

Ghost: I will never send another inappropriate message.

Ghost: Please stop laughing.

Soap: i cant

Soap: my face hurts

Soap: ur so awkward

Soap: im dying

Ghost: Thank you for your feedback.

Ghost: Now please stop messaging me.

Soap: hey. gaz is rlly sad about his stolen phone. give it back. 

Ghost: What is a gaz?

Soap: the drunk guy u stole the phone from a few days ago.

Ghost: That seems like his problem.

Soap: yeah. but if u give him the phone back, he might let me play with his new sniper rifle. 

Ghost: Interesting.

Soap: he also has a big bag of jelly beans.

Ghost: I have his phone.

Soap: u wanna come over and trade it for the jelly beans?

Ghost: No.

Soap: :(

Ghost: Maybe.

Soap: yes!!

Ghost: You can have the phone.

Ghost: But only if you take a picture of him holding the jelly beans and send it to me.

Soap: that sounds easy enough.

Soap: do u like black liquorice?

Ghost: No.

Soap: good.

Ghost: ?

Soap: hey

Ghost: This is not Gaz's number.

Soap: i know. it’s urs and we’re friends now

Ghost: No, we aren't.

Soap: yes, we are.

Soap: if ur not gonna give the phone back, at least tell me a name i can put in the contact for this number

Ghost: No. 

Soap: just gimme a name. or i'll make one up for u

Ghost: Do not.

Soap: u know what, i think u look like a jack

Ghost: You don't even know what I look like.

Soap: no, but that doesn't matter

Soap: i think i have an idea

Soap: and a friend named jack. it would be hilarious

Ghost: Please, no.

Soap: too late. jack it is

Jack: I don't want to be called that.

Soap: it's a nice name

Jack: You don't even know if I'm a guy.

Soap: are u

Jack: That's not the point.

Jack: It doesn't matter.

Soap: then what's ur name

Jack: If I give you a name, will you leave me alone?

Soap: yeah

Jack: Okay.

Jack: Call me Toad.

Soap: toad???

Soap: ok

Toad: Okay?

Soap: i'm not gonna call u that

Toad: Then why did you say you would?

Soap: why did u say u would give the phone back and then not give it back?

Toad: Fine.

Soap: fine

Toad: Good.

Soap: good!

Soap: hey toad

Toad: Oh my god.

Soap: how are u

Toad: I hate everything.

Soap: what a coincidence. so do i

Toad: How wonderful for us.

Soap: yeah it is.

Soap: u want to hear about the mission i just got back from?

Toad: It’s Ghost, not Toad. And I literally couldn't care less.

Soap: well that's rude. it was very exciting

Ghost: Are you military?

Soap: u know i could have asked for the phone back a long time ago. but i'm not. i'm just a good samaritan who wanted to make sure u got home safe

Ghost: That was a lot of words.

Soap: i had a lot to say

Ghost: Are you always like this?

Soap: yes. anyway, i am military. sort of. i like making stuff explode.

Ghost: What's your rank?

Soap: sergeant. i'm pretty cool.

Ghost: Cooler than most sergeants?

Soap: probably

Soap: but i still wouldn't tell gaz i said that

Ghost: Who is Gaz again?

Soap: i already told u

Ghost: It's been a while. I forgot.

Soap: that's the same as saying u care. i know u care.

Ghost: I don't.

Soap: ok, u dont care.

Ghost: I don't.

Soap: so if i texted u at 3 am to say my roommate accidentally lit my bed on fire, u wouldn't care?

Ghost: That's different.

Ghost: If you're really in the military, you should be able to deal with it.

Soap: wow.

Soap: ur kind of a dick

Ghost: You don't even know me.

Ghost: Besides, I'm not a dick. I'm a ghost.

Soap: lol

Soap: did u just make a joke?

Ghost: I suppose I did.

Soap: nice. maybe i'll forgive u

Ghost: For what?

Soap: stealing a phone

Ghost: Stealing a phone that I found on a public bathroom sink.

Ghost: The same phone that is currently being used to annoy the hell out of me.

Soap: karma is a bitch

Ghost: Is it?

Ghost: Or are you a bitch?

Ghost: maybe both.

Ghost: Sounds like it.

Soap: i'm gonna text u every day.

Ghost: I don't even know your name.

Soap: john mactavish. they call me soap tho.

Ghost: Soap.

Soap: yea

Ghost: Your name is John, and people call you Soap. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

Soap: i've heard worse

Ghost: I believe it.

Ghost: How the hell do you get Soap from John, though?

Soap: u could just call me john

Ghost: I will never call you John.

Soap: k

Ghost: Ever.

Soap: nice talk.

Ghost: Don't text me anymore.

Soap: they call me soap bc i clean up real nice

Ghost: I thought we agreed you wouldn't text me.

Soap: oh did we? i don't remember that

Ghost: I hate you.

Soap: <3

Ghost: Was that an emoji? Never do that again.

Soap: but rlly. the reason i'm called soap is bc i set some kind of record time clearing a warehouse in basic and it just kind of stuck

Ghost: Why are you telling me this?

Soap: to help u sleep at night

Ghost: It will not.

Soap: what kind of name is ghost anyway?

Ghost: Not important.

Soap: i've seen some of the guys around here. they aren't ghosts

Ghost: That's the point.

Soap: i bet you have a boring ass name like timothy

Ghost: Don't be ridiculous.

Soap: markus

Ghost: No.

Soap: paul

Ghost: I'm going to block this number.

Soap: okay okay, sorry

Soap: can i call u smthn normal like dave

Ghost: You're not even close.

Soap: damn

Soap: what do i get if i guess it right

Ghost: Absolutely nothing.

Soap: i'm not gonna stop guessing til u give me smthn

Ghost: How about you stop texting me and I won't kill you.

Soap: no ur a nice guy. u wouldn't do that

Ghost: Try me.

Soap: fine, i'll leave u alone for a day

Ghost: A week.

Soap: two days.

Ghost: Four days.

Soap: three

Ghost: Three days and a photo.

Soap: what?

Ghost: A photo of you. 

Soap: why?

Ghost: I want to see what you look like.

Soap: why didn't u ask before

Ghost: Because I didn't care before.

Soap: send me a picture of u first

Ghost: No.

Soap: i'll think about it if u do

Ghost: I won't.

Soap: i'll take a bad picture.

Ghost: Why do you have a bad picture of yourself?

Soap: for situations just like this

Ghost: Okay.

Soap: u send one first.

Ghost: No.

Soap: i have pics of u already.

Ghost: What?!

Soap: lol

Soap: not really

Ghost: Don't fucking do that.

Soap: don't threaten to kill me

Ghost: Don't scare me.

Soap: ur not very good at this, are u?

Ghost: At what?

Soap: talking to people

Ghost: It doesn't seem to matter. You're still talking to me.

Soap: i guess it's a gift.

Soap: what would u do if i sent u a pic of myself

Ghost: Nothing.

Soap: that's a lie. u would look at it. perhaps save it to ur camera roll

Ghost: What do you want from me?

Soap: i wanna be friends

Ghost: Why?

Soap: u seem lonely

Ghost: I'm not.

Soap: u can keep telling me u hate me but i know that u don't

Ghost: I don't hate you.

Soap: so u like me?

Ghost: No.

Soap: we r gonna be the best of friends

Ghost: No, we aren't.

Ghost: Send me the picture.

Soap:

Soap: there. i cropped it so u couldn’t dox me

Ghost: Nice try. But I'm not a civilian. And I'm not an idiot.

Soap: ur not a civilian?

Ghost: Fuck.

Ghost: Pretend you didn't read that.

Soap: only if u send me a selfie 

Ghost: This is extortion.

Soap: yup

Ghost: I don't have a photo.

Soap: then take a new one

Ghost: Fine. 

Soap: is that a skull mask? and skeleton gloves? are u sure ur not an edgy teenager under there?

Ghost: Just shut up.

Soap: this is great. can i post this on instagram

Ghost: No.

Soap: can i show my roommates

Ghost: No.

Soap: ok, can i save it for blackmail purposes

Ghost: I would prefer it if you didn't.

Soap: too late

Soap: i didn’t think u had brown eyes

Ghost: You have an unfortunate beard.

Soap: what does that even mean?

Ghost: Exactly what it sounds like.

Soap: fuck off. ur a beanie baby.

Ghost: ?

Soap: a beanie baby. theyre like those little stuffed animals and u collect them. except, yk, a beanie baby

Ghost: I know what a beanie baby is. Why did you call me one?

Soap: ur just a little soft, squishy man

Ghost: Fuck you.

Soap: :)

Soap: did u know there are beanie babies of real people?

Ghost: What the fuck are you talking about?

Soap: i'm at walmart and i saw this miley cyrus beanie baby

Ghost: Miley Cyrus is not real.

Soap: they're called limited editions. u gotta collect them all

Soap: wait what do u mean miley cyrus isn’t real

Ghost: I mean that Miley Cyrus is an illusion. A fabricated idea created by a corrupt government and sold to the public. An industry plant to poison the minds of the youth. 

Ghost: But now you've ruined the surprise, and her secret is out. 

Soap: omg

Soap: i thought her secret was hannah montana

Ghost: You know nothing, Soap.

Soap: i can't believe you broke into gaz's phone, stole it, and now u won't tell me ur name

Soap: and yet u just tried to gaslight me into thinking miley cyrus isn't real

Ghost: I would have gotten away with it, too, if not for you meddling kids.

Soap: are u even a real person

Ghost: I have a question for you, Soap.

Soap: yeah

Ghost: Why haven't you reported this stolen phone to your authorities?

Soap: it's not that big of a deal. gaz has another phone. i think he just liked this one better

Ghost: And what about me?

Soap: what about u?

Ghost: How do you know I'm not a terrorist who is using the phone to spy on the military or steal secrets?

Soap: u don't seem like a terrorist

Ghost: Thanks.

Soap: and besides, u couldn't have stolen that many secrets if u didn't know miley cyrus is real

Ghost: I could.

Soap: how do u even use a phone with skeleton gloves on?

Ghost: With difficulty.

Soap: that helmet makes u look stupid

Ghost: Says the guy with the worst beard I've ever seen.

Soap: i'll have u know i've been told it makes me look handsome

Ghost: By who? Yourself?

Soap: well now i am not telling

Soap:

Ghost: I bet it was a mirror.

Soap: i would say i'd block u, but we both know i won't

Ghost: That's fine. We both know I won't give you the phone back.

Soap: that's true.

Soap: did u know gaz has a lot of games on his phone

Ghost: Like what?

Soap: the entire clash of clans series. a few versions of candy crush. and something called lovehoney. not sure what that one is.

Ghost: Are you sure about that, Soap?

Soap: ?

Ghost: Have you actually played LoveHoney?

Soap: no, it says its rated m

Ghost: I thought you said you were a grown ass man?

Soap: i can't play a rated m game without supervision

Ghost: Oh, really?

Ghost: Do you want supervision?

Soap: from who? u?

Ghost: Maybe.

Soap: u should come visit us sometime. we can play clash of clans together

Ghost: I'd rather stab myself.

Soap: :(

Ghost: Why do you keep using emojis?

Soap: to convey emotion

Ghost: But there are words for emotions.

Soap: u should try it

Ghost: Why would I do that when I have a mask and a helmet to hide my face?

Soap: why do u hide ur face anyway? are u ugly?

Ghost: Quite the opposite.

Soap: oh so ur pretty

Ghost: I don't see how that matters.

Soap: ur face matters a lot if it's the only thing u can see when u look at someone

Ghost: Then look elsewhere.

Soap: can't. the rest of u is covered up

Ghost: If you're lucky, you'll never have to see the rest of me.

Soap: if u were here i could prove to u that ur a real person

Ghost: Is that so?

Soap: yes. i would hold ur hand

Ghost: Gross.

Soap: maybe even hug u

Ghost: Definitely gross.

Soap: i'm a very affectionate person

Ghost: That's unfortunate.

Soap: i can be anything u want me to be

Ghost: Not interested.

Soap: ok fine, i can be anything u aren't

Ghost: Good luck with that.

Soap: do u always text like ur writing a report

Ghost: Yes.

Soap: it's boring

Ghost: You are boring.

Soap: and yet u keep replying

Ghost: I don't know why.

Soap: maybe bc we r friends

Ghost: That's not why.

Soap: yes it is.

Ghost:

Soap: is that a dog

Ghost: It's a German Shepard.

Soap: i hate dogs.

Ghost: I thought you might.

Soap: why

Ghost: They remind me of you.

Soap: hahaha

Ghost: They are loyal and dumb and kind of cute.

Soap: omg

Ghost: But also aggressive and loud and have terrible breath.

Soap: did u just call me cute

Ghost: I did.

Soap: are u drunk?

Ghost: No.

Ghost: Maybe.

Soap: do u always get drunk and text random guys on stolen phones?

Ghost: It's the only way I can talk to anyone.

Soap: why

Ghost: Because no one wants to get close to a ghost.

Soap: that was so dramatic

Ghost: So is your fucking beard.

Soap: it's a fashion statement

Ghost: It's ugly.

Soap: and what, ur face is too pretty for the world?

Ghost: Exactly.

Soap: if u weren't a stranger, i'd probably be a little offended

Ghost: We're not strangers.

Soap: not really, i guess. but u don't know anything about me

Ghost: I know your name.

Ghost: I know your rank.

Ghost: I know you work for an unspecified organization.

Ghost: I know you're a complete idiot.

Soap: hey!

Ghost: I know you like jelly beans.

Ghost: I know you're not as much of an asshole as I thought you were.

Ghost: And I know I like talking to you.

Soap: i like talking to u too. even if u insult me every chance u get

Ghost: It's because you're an easy target.

Soap: u are literally the least charming person i have ever met

Ghost: Thank you. to be continued - subscribe on ao3 for next chapters :3

#ghoap #john soap mactavish #cod mw2 #ghostsoap #mw3 #cod #cod mw3 #fanfic #ghost x soap #soapghost #simon ghost riley #fluff #pining #archive of our own #dumb #sfw #mwiii #ghost #soap #cod art #john mactavish #simon riley #ao3 #ao3 fanfic #silly #crack fic #idiots in love

[faorism]

needing the au to drop wherein i can commit to writing a historical au,, because since i first watched the db cooper job my mind went straight to OT3! OT3! OT3! (unlike with the van gogh job, since i aint playing with that fucking lieutenant)

one day maybe one dayyyyy i will sit down and i will write the ot3 into that episode's story. so, it'll be the backgrounds for the characters in the flashback (so, stephanie ritter, steve reynolds, and reggie wilkins), but with the necessary personality adjustments (parker, eliot, and hardison respectively). basically, vintage ot3 with some hot as hell aesthetics and secrets and avoiding as much as possible producing copraganda.

so. my thoughts. what i see happening. and this got super long so im throwing this under a cut. and for ease i will call them by their modern day canon names except when making a point.

first, general thoughts about the characters.

and so: steve to eliot. nothing much here on the surface. eliot still volunteers, too much an indoctrinated white man to have been forcibly drafted. so its still one man gone to war. one man come back. eliot would had been noticed early in training for his ability to pick shit up, and they teased at maybe sending him to a special unit. maybe they do, or maybe they don't because they just need to funnel fuckers to the jungle. the vietnam invasion was a terrorist imperialist venture and there's no romanticizing from me about anything done being at all valorous or special or brother-in-arms'y. and eliot commits war crimes under the american stars and stripes instead of just to keep moreau's champaign running. but also maybe moreau is eliot's superior. he certainly would have been rewarded for this ruthlessness. (eliot of course strove to impress moreau because there aint an eliot spencer who wasn't that man's dog at some point, i!!!! dont make the rules). eliot's friend died and eliot's gone off to carry out his wishes and moreau lets him because he Knows eliot is gonna come back. whether its to come back to the same squad, or follow him into deeper spy shit for the military, or to fuck off and go private. then eliot meets parker.

now. stephanie to parker. beth plays normal so well im mad at her, but there's something edgy and strategic about stephanie that i think parker can grab onto. i feel that maybe she was kind of a thief still, but there's more realism to this world so archie wasnt a super secret spy with lasers to practice with, but just a guy with sticky fingers whos a little bored and wants a protege. parker is good really good at what she does, and not having to deal with lasers makes me easy. but she's into scams that are less grifts and more Catch Me If You Can slight of hands. she's always looking for easy money (she was into lifting cars at one point! literally she follows where the crime is). she's doing something in an airport and someone tries to recruit her as a flight attendant because she's got the Look. and yall, flight attendants? that shit was like being a model and an astronaut and a time traveler back then. and according to a teacher i had, who once worked as in the f.a. union, those ladies back in the day were rad and queer and free spirited and runnnnning shit. i think, yes, it's a Job which i think we might resist placing parker into. but! of the jobs, at the time, i really see her rocking it during the time period. (also come on, the opportunities to swindle distracted people of their shit would be endless. they would just think they dropped their stuff in the airport! not that it was stolen.)

finally, reggie to alec. i think hardison will be the hardest to translate. even tho i admittedly listen to a lot of true crime podcasts, i dont know much about fbi life and also definitely don't know about it historically. part of me desperately wants to put him somewhere else even if it does have to stay within the fbi. i might cheat and make him like a Q(uartermaster) to 007/00s like in james bond, and he's like UGH this is horrible god i hate working for the fbi but they will give me funding so...... anyway, here's this totally cool [radio term]. that said, if hardison is stuck in the fbi, why he ends up there is that he is a fucking savant when it comes to research and the man can put together a presentation like no one else. that white man gets all the credit for profiling but it was hardison who goddamn was the google of the microfilm days. reggie felt super square but that might be because he had to deal with mcsweeties db cooper shit day in and day out for years. hardison is more himself. and definitely still a nerd. alec would be into dime fantasy novels and comics and ham radios and oh god he also would be into star trek like the original star trek as it came out and he would be into the zines yes! yessss. omg. also he plays a mean arcade cabinet. but he's mostly well adjusted but lonely. his colleagues dont appreciate him because fbi esp during that time were fucking wilding out and racist as hell aaaaaand im sorry im srry im trying so hard to have fbi hardison make sense but also! acab. ANYWAY.

second, the relationship

i think it would be fun to play with what it means to have parker/eliot start off first and bring in hardison afterwards. (if white collar is your thing, it would be like this canon divergent ot3 fic wherein peter burke is the last to join in.) i feel they would be Super Intense esp since they are carrying this big ass secret. kind of broken and dysfunctional and there's the passion and the commitment, but i think there's also a tenderness that's super hard for them to achieve? and i think there's a way that hardison plays such an important part in who they are and how they are. like, sure i think parker/eliot would have joy but they won't have levity. they would have compassion but they won't have gentleness.

eliot meets hardison after being recruited by nate. i think they get close because while nate and eliot have an interesting and compelling mentorship/friendship, nate is still eliots superior; sometimes its nice to complain about your boss, as hardison will say to eliot to try to make friends. i think hardison and eliot would become legit friends and not just work buddies because they are just not cut out of the same cloth as the rest of their colleagues. they grab beers after work. after hard days, hardison cajoles eliot into going to the arcade. they are friends. real real truly deep best friends, in a way hardison didn't think he could have with a fed and eliot didnt think he would have after his friend died. but also? they are like "buds" who are buds who are desperately tryna to cross any lines because there's a.... tension? an UST between them they dont know what to do with.

parker meets eliot by way of a "lets have my friend for dinner, he's a blast." and immediately immediately hardison is like... wow this woman is beautiful but like, really attracted to her personality. and parker things hardison is kinda dorky but cute dorkie? anyway, they have a puppy love situation growing. and it keeps growing until bam. eliot and parker are like. are we into alec???? fuck we are aren't we.

i think stephanie and steve would never tell reggie (even if somehow they were to be a thing). but parker and eliot? hell yeah they tell hardison. eventually. after a while. sooner than maybe they should. the tension if they should say something is one of the things that build up as UST between them for so long; parker and eliot know they are carrying this huge thing. two huge things. eliot being db cooper and also their massive crush on him.

if i could control myself to stick to a pwp, it would be another christmas. maybe the christmas nine (more?) years down the road. the damn snow grounded hardison's flight back to his nana's, and parker and eliot hear this and invite him over. the egg nog gets flowing and parker eventually is like,, fuck this. and comes onto hardison. and hardison would be like wow wow what but... idk, free love and swinging were In The Thoughts And Minds Of The People. he still checks in with eliot who is like. her body, man; i aint gonna tell her what to do. and for a sec hardison is like, man is this a cuck situation? i guess i can be for it but also...... aint mad if i aint alone. and eliot is so grateful and idk. i just want them all to be happy and having fun and no one to be left out. and yeah i am kinda brushing over a lot of the racial politics which, in a more developed fic rather than a pwp, would definitely need to be brought in; but idk that needs to just be in the bedrock of whatever plot is going into this.

it takes a lot of maneuvering of their lives but they make it work and eventually hardison is a keeper of eliot's secret too.

(apart from the historical aspect, another reason i probably won't actually write this is because i know myself. i would want to do worldbuilding. i would follow eliot and alec to their jobs, but i wouldnt want to write outright copaganda. the grit/realism i would be comfortable with would take a level of research i dont think i can commit to. but if someone wants to take this up or if you figure out a way around this issue, pls do i wont be mad)

#eliot spencer #parker leverage #alec hardison #leverage #thiefsome #okay i srsly am not this active but this week got me wanting to talk and talk about these three beauties #the db cooper job

[asexual--junpei]

ᕦ(✧ᗜ✧)ᕥ You take the moon and you take the sun. ᕦ(✧ᗜ✧)ᕥ

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) You take everything that sounds like fun. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

☞♥Ꮂ♥☞ You stir it all together and then you're done. ☞♥Ꮂ♥☞

ᕙ(◍.◎)ᕗ Rada rada rada rada rada rada. ᕙ(◍.◎)ᕗ

ᕦ(✧ᗜ✧)ᕥ ☞♥Ꮂ♥☞ ᕙ(◍.◎)ᕗ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) So come on in, feel free to do some looking.

Stay a while 'cause somethings always cooking.

Come on in, feel free to do some looking.

Stay a while 'cause somethings always cooking.

Yeah!!! ᕦ(✧ᗜ✧)ᕥ ☞♥Ꮂ♥☞ ᕙ(◍.◎)ᕗ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

You are about to get spammed with 600 dank memes. Prepare all nukes and weapons for the Great Spam War. If you can contain the amount of spam I have, you will be granted with special powers that allow you to smoke weed 200 times harder. Not only that, but you will have a laggy as fuck laptop. You know how lucky you are?????? My laptop runs at 669FPS and it never lags or is slow. YOU LUCKY SON OF A GUN. You will pay the price by me giving you a link (Which shall contain a download) which will wipe all your memory off the face of this universe and overwrite it with my own software, Memesoftlocker2.0000.0. You are so damn lucky you know that? NOT EVEN I HAVE IT SLUT. But if you were able to read up to this point congratulations, you suck. But click this link www.mymom.;;;;;;/eeeeeeee.crash; and you will be taken to a memory erase phrase. You lucky slut, but you will get the best computer software ever that makes your computer lag so bad that you can't even use it. LIKE HOW AMAZING??? Yes, I promise you this is 420% legit. But if you spread this abusive software you have EARNED I will suck you off this living universe so be careful buddy. Now, Please stop reading this message as it ends now...

Excuse me? I find vaping to be one of the best things in my life. It has carried me through the toughest of times and brought light and vapor upon my spirit. You're just another one of those people who doesn't believe in chem trails and fluoride turning us gay. Your ignorance to the government is what makes you a sheep in today's society. Have fun being a slave to todays's system.

🆗 son, 🌞 there ain't��❌a ☝single☝fucking☝person☝ with any intellect👓👓📖who gives a 🎮remote🎮fuck🎮about your extensive vaping💯😎💨 talent. 😂I happen to be quite🎩the🎩intellectual🎩myself, so I can confirm✔✔this fact💯as truth™.👌if👌you👌think👌 that your vape💯😎💨 is going↗to get you hoes👯👯, you are utterly🐄 mistaken❌, fam👪. my pa👨 once taught📖 me the 😏secret😏 of life👍💛, and it was not❌❌ your vape💯😎💨 🆗🆒now listen 👂👂here my chum✌✌, my pa👨 was a man who kept it 💯💯💯💯💯💯. ✋that✋is✋six✋fucking✋hundreds✋ and he never❌🙅🙅 once vaped💯😎💨. The man 🚬smoked🚬some🚬mad🚬cigars🚬 because he wasnt❌the pussy🐱🐱you are🆗⁉❗⁉ he lived to be 💯 because he kept it 💯💯💯💯💯💯 and killed🔫🔪 👌every👌vaping👌fucker👌he👌saw👌🆗🆒😂😂👀👀 so in the spirit👻of me good ol pa👨, I think💭you should kys🔫 they have 🆓 vapes💯😎💨 in hell🔥and🔥it's🔥lit🔥for😂 unintelligent vaping💯😎💨 hooligans like yourself👌😂😂

I sexually Identify as a Gabe Newell. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of filling my wallet by dropping Steam Sales onto 12 000 games at once. People say to me that a person being a Newell is impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I have 10 computers worth over 10k each in order to drop new Steam Sales every few days. From now on I want you guys to call me "Gabe" and respect my right to get rich fast and discount needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a profitophobe and need to check your wallet. Thank you for being so understanding.

We regret to inform you that the card titled "Mommy's Debit" has been declinded your latest purchases due to suspicous activities. To unlock your card for further use, please confirm your recent purchases with your local bank. The listing follows

- 1x Monster Horse Dildo 12' Lubricated Thrusters

- 3x Backdoor Sluts 9

- 1x "Undetectable Aimbot" from AimJunkies

- 6x Magnum condoms

- 5x Bananas

- 1x Small Condom

- 2x Subscription to JakeChillz Minecraft stream

- 1x Deag's Rust Career

- 1x Gay Poster

Please respond back to us using your old email:

[email protected]

Thanks for your patience,

Wells All Mighty Lord Gabe.

Here in my garage, just bought this new lamborghini here. It’s fun to drive up here in the Steam Hills. But you know what I like more than single discounts? Steam Sales In fact, I’m a lot more proud of two new Steam Sales that I had to get installed to hold twelve thousand new discounts on Steam. It’s like what i say, “the more you discount, the more you earn.”

My Grandfather smoked his whole life. I was about 10 years old when my mother said to him, 'If you ever want to see your grandchildren graduate, you have to stop immediately.'. Tears welled up in his eyes when he realized what exactly was at stake. He gave it up immediately. Three years later he died of lung cancer. It was really sad and destroyed me. My mother said to me- 'Don't ever smoke. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a cigarette. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because your post gave me cancer anyway.

ＨＥＹ ＲＴＺ， Ｉ’Ｍ ＴＲＹＩＮＧ ＴＯ ＬＥＡＲＮ ＴＯ ＰＬＡＹ ＲＩＫＩ． Ｉ ＪＵＳＴ ＨＡＶＥ Ａ ＱＵＥＳＴＩＯＮ ＡＢＯＵＴ ＴＨＥ ＳＫＩＬＬ ＢＵＩＬＤ： ＳＨＯＵＬＤ Ｉ ＭＡＸ ＢＡＣＫＳＴＡＢ ＬＩＫＥ ＹＯＵ ＢＡＣＫＳＴＡＢＢＥＤ ＥＧ， ＳＭＯＫＥＳＣＲＥＥＮ ＳＯ ＴＨＥＹ ＭＩＳＳ ＭＥ ＬＩＫＥ ＥＧ ＭＩＳＳ ＹＯＵ ７０％ ＯＦ ＴＨＥ ＴＩＭＥ， ＯＲ ＰＥＲＭＡＮＥＴ ＩＮＶＩＳＩＢＩＬＩＴＹ ＳＯ Ｉ ＣＯＵＬＤ ＤＩＳＡＰＰＥＡＲ ＬＩＫＥ ＹＯＵ ＤＩＳＡＰＰＥＡＲＥＤ ＦＲＯＭ ＥＧ

I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.

Gr8 b8, m8. I rel8, str8 appreci8, and congratul8. I r8 this b8 an 8/8. Plz no h8, I'm str8 ir8. Cr8 more, can't w8. We should convers8, I won't ber8, my number is 8888888, ask for N8. No calls l8 or out of st8. If on a d8, ask K8 to loc8. Even with a full pl8, I always have time to communic8 so don't hesit8. dont forget to medit8 and particip8 and masturb8 to allevi8 your ability to tabul8 the f8. We should meet up m8 and convers8 on how we can cre8 more gr8 b8, I'm sure everyone would appreci8, no h8. I don't mean to defl8 your hopes, but its hard to dict8 where the b8 will rel8 and we may end up with out being appreci8d, I'm sure you can rel8. We can cre8 b8 like alexander the gr8, stretch posts longer than the Nile's str8s. We'll be the captains of b8, 4chan our first m8s the growth r8 will spread to reddit and like real est8 and be a flow r8 of gr8 b8, like a blind d8 we'll coll8, meet me upst8 where we can convers8, or ice sk8 or lose w8 infl8 our hot air baloons and fly, tail g8. We could land in Kuw8, eat a soup pl8 followed by a dessert pl8 the payment r8 won't be too ir8 and hopefully our currency won't defl8. We'll head to the Israeli-St8, taker over like Herod the gr8 and b8 the jewish masses, 8 million, m8. We could interrel8 communism, thought it's past it's maturity d8, a department of st8, volunteer st8. reduce the infant mortality r8, all in the name of making gr8 b8 m8.

What the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) did you just ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) say about me, you little ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)? I'll have you know I graduated top of my ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) in the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), and I've been involved in numerous secret ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) on ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), and I have over 300 confirmed ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). I am trained in ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) warfare and I'm the top ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) in the entire US armed ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). You are nothing to me but just another ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). I will wipe you the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) out with precision the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) of which has never been seen before on this ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), mark my ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) words. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) think ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) can get away with saying that ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) to me over the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)? Think again, ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). As we speak I am contacting my secret network of ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) across the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) and your ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) is being ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) right now so you better ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) for the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). The ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). You're ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) dead, ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). I can be ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), anytime, and I can ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) you in over seven hundred ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), and that's just with my bare ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). Not only am I extensively trained in ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) combat, but I have access to the entire ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) of the United States ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) off the face of the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), you little ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) comment was about to bring down upon ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), maybe you would have held your ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). I will ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) fury all over ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) and ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) will ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) in it. You're ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) dead, ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°).

My name is Artour Babaevsky. I grow up in smal farm to have make potatos. Father say "Artour, potato harvest is bad. Need you to have play professional Doto in Amerikanski for make money for head-scarf for babushka."I bring honor to komrade and babushka. Sorry for is not have English. Please no cyka pasta coperino pasterino liquidino throwerino.

hi every1 im new!!!!!!! holds up spork my name is katy but u can call me t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m!!!!!!!! lol…as u can see im very random!!!! thats why i came here, 2 meet random ppl like me _… im 13 years old (im mature 4 my age tho!!) i like 2 watch invader zim w/ my girlfreind (im bi if u dont like it deal w/it) its our favorite tv show!!! bcuz its SOOOO random!!!! shes random 2 of course but i want 2 meet more random ppl =) like they say the more the merrier!!!! lol…neways i hope 2 make alot of freinds here so give me lots of commentses!!!!

DOOOOOMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <--- me bein random again _^ hehe…toodles!!!!!

Hi, 4k player here who reported slahser. Slahser was our position 1 faceless void. He built a mek and had around 29 healing salves in his inventory. He would chrono both teams in the middle of a fight, salve his allies, pop mek, and proceeded to yell "SLAHSER'S WAY". We gave him position 1 farm so he could be a position 5.

Granted, his unorthodox build worked and carried us to victory but I still felt it deserved a report.

I owe my life to Arteezy. I got in a horrible car crash and i was in 6 month coma. The nurse switched to the Twitch channel to Arteezy's stream. I awoke from my coma and muted it.

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ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ RAISE YOUR DONGERS ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ

(ง ͠ ͠° ل͜ °)ง ᴛʜᴇ ᴜɴsᴇᴇɴ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴇᴀᴅʟɪᴇsᴛ (ง ͠° ل͜ °)ง

▬▬ι═══════ﺤ As I ʜᴏʟᴅ ᴛʜᴇ sᴀᴍᴜʀᴀɪ sᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴍʏ sᴛᴏᴍᴀᴄʜ ᴀs I ᴡᴀs ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴄᴏᴍᴍɪᴛ sᴜᴅᴏᴋᴜ, I ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜ Kʀɪᴘᴘ ᴘʟᴀʏ Cᴀsᴜᴀʟsᴛᴏɴᴇ... I ʀᴇᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ ᴀ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ Kʀɪᴘ ᴡᴀs Nᴏʟɪғᴇ... ɴᴏᴡ I ᴀᴍ Nᴏʟɪғᴇ...ɢᴏᴏᴅ ʙʏᴇ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ ▬▬ι═══════ﺤ

(ง ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)ง ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴏᴜʀ ᴄʜᴀᴛ ᴍᴏᴅs (ง ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)ง (ง •̀_•́)ง ʏᴇᴀʜ sᴘᴀᴍ ɪᴛ! (ง •̀_•́)ง

(╭ರ_•́)\ Mr. Fors we politely ask for the program 'Plug-Dj" to be used in this live broadcast for alas we will stir up a ruckus (╭ರ_•́)

(̿▀̿ ̿Ĺ̯̿̿▀̿ ̿)̄ ɴᴀᴍᴇ's ᴅᴏɴɢ. ᴊᴀᴍᴇs ᴅᴏɴɢ (̿▀̿ ̿Ĺ̯̿̿▀̿ ̿)̄

(ง ͠° ͟ل͜ ͡°)ง I have been training since before I was born, and today is the day. Today is the day I spam. (ง ͠° ͟ل͜ ͡°)ง

༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽YOU CAME TO THE WRONG DONGERHOOD༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽

༼ ºل͟º ༼ ºل͟º ༼ ºل͟º ༽ ºل͟º ༽ ºل͟º ༽ YOU PASTARINO'D THE WRONG DONGERINO ༼ ºل͟º ༼ ºل͟º ༼ ºل͟º ༽ ºل͟º ༽ ºل͟º ༽

༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༽ºل͟º ༽ YOU COPERINO FRAPPUCCIONO PASTARINO'D THE WRONG DONGERINO ༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༽ºل͟º ༽

༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽You either die a DONG, or live long enough to become the DONGER༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽

༼ ಠل͟ರೃ༼ ಠل͟ರೃ༼ ಠل͟ರೃ༼ ಠل͟ರೃ ༽ಠل͟ರೃ ༽ಠل͟ರೃ ༽ YOU ARRIVED IN THE INCORRECT DONGERHOOD, SIR༼ ಠل͟ರೃ༼ ಠل͟ರೃ༼ ಠل͟ರೃ༼ ಠل͟ರೃ ༽ಠل͟ರೃ ༽ಠل͟ರೃ ༽

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )つ──☆*:・ﾟ clickty clack clickty clack with this chant I summon spam to the chat ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )つ──☆*:・ﾟ

ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ. ʜᴀʀᴅᴇʀ, ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ, ғᴀsᴛᴇʀ, ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀ .ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ

ヽ(◉◡◔)ﾉ I'M LOL FAN AND I HAVE DOWN SYNDROME ヽ(◉◡◔)ﾉ

(ง ͠° ͟ل͜ ͡°)ง ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀ, ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇɴᴇᴍʏ (ง ͠° ͟ل͜ ͡°)ง

(ง ͠° ل͜ °)ง LET ME DEMONSTRATE DONGER DIPLOMACY (ง ͠° ل͜ °)ง

(\ ( ͠° ͟ل͜ ͡°) /) OUR DONGERS ARE RAZOR SHARP (\ ( ͠° ͟ل͜ ͡°) /)

ヽ༼◥▶ل͜◀◤༽ﾉ RO RO RAISE YOUR DONGERS ヽ༼◥▶ل͜◀◤༽ﾉ ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿'̿'̵͇̿̿з=༼ ▀̿̿Ĺ̯̿̿▀̿ ̿ ༽=ε/̵͇̿̿/’̿’̿ ̿ ̿̿[} ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿^ Stop right there criminal scum! no one RIOTs on my watch. I'm confiscating your goods. now pay your fine, or it's off to jail. ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿'̿'̵͇̿̿з=༼ ▀̿̿Ĺ̯̿̿▀̿ ̿ ༽ YOU'RE UNDER ARREST FOR BEING CASUAL. COME OUT WITH YOUR DONGERS RAISED ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿'̿'̵͇̿̿з=༼ ▀̿̿Ĺ̯̿̿▀̿ ̿ ༽

(ง'̀-'́)ง ＤＯＮＧ ＯＲ ＤＩＥ (ง'̀-'́)ง

ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ raise your dongers ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ

ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ VOICE OF AN ANGEL ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ

ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ LETS GET DONGERATED ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ

ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ RAISE YOUR BARNO ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ

ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ "I have a dong" ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ - Martin Luther King Jr.

ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ OJ poured and candle lit, with this chant i summon Kripp ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ

☑ OJ poured ☑ Candle lit ☑ Summoning the Kripp ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ

ヽ༼ຈل͜O༽ﾉ ʀᴀɪs ᴜʀ ᴅᴀɢ���ʀᴏ ヽ༼ຈل͜___ຈ༽ﾉ

(ง ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)งSuccubus release Kripp or taste our rage(ง ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)ง

ノ(ಠ_ಠノ ) ʟᴏᴡᴇʀ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀs ノ(ಠ_ಠノ)

ヽ༼Ὸل͜ຈ༽ﾉ HOIST THY DONGERS ヽ༼Ὸل͜ຈ༽ﾉ

ヽ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ﾉ Kripp you are kinda like my dad, except you're always there for me. ヽ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ﾉ

█▄༼ຈل͜ຈ༽▄█ yeah i work out

༼ ºل͟º ༽ I AM A DONG ༼ ºل͟º ༽

༼ ºل͟º༽ I DIDN'T CHOOSE THE DONGLIFE, THE DONGLIFE CHOSE ME ༼ ºل͟º༽

༼ ºل͟º༽ NO ONE CARED WHO I WAS UNTIL I PUT ON THE DONG ༼ ºل͟º༽

༼ ºººººل͟ººººº ༽ I AM SUPER DONG ༼ ºººººل͟ººººº ༽

┌∩┐༼ ºل͟º ༽┌∩┐ SUCK MY DONGER ┌∩┐༼ ºل͟º ༽┌∩┐

ζ༼Ɵ͆ل͜Ɵ͆༽ᶘ FINALLY A REAL DONG ζ༼Ɵ͆ل͜Ɵ͆༽ᶘ

<ᴍᴇssᴀɢᴇ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀᴇᴅ>

ヽ༼ʘ̚ل͜ʘ̚༽ﾉIS THAT A DONGER IN YOUR POCKET?ヽ༼ʘ̚ل͜ʘ̚༽ﾉ

༼ ͡■ل͜ ͡■༽ OPPA DONGER STYLE ༼ ͡■ل͜ ͡■༽

( ° ͜ ʖ °) REGI OP ( ° ͜ ʖ °)

(̿▀̿ ̿Ĺ̯̿̿▀̿ ̿)̄ IM DONG,JAMES DONG (̿▀̿ ̿Ĺ̯̿̿▀̿ ̿)̄

(ง⌐□ل͜□)ง WOULD YOU HIT A DONGER WITH GLASSES (ง⌐□ل͜□)ง

ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ CUDDLE UR DONGERS ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

ლ(́◉◞౪◟◉‵ლ) let me hold your donger for a while ლ(́◉◞౪◟◉‵ლ)

ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ง MY RIGHT DONG IS ALOT STRONGER THAN MY LEFT ONE ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ง

(✌ﾟ∀ﾟ)☞ May the DONG be with you! ☚(ﾟヮﾟ☚)

(⌐■_■)=/̵͇̿̿/'̿'̿̿̿ ̿ ̿̿ ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ Keep Your Dongers Where i Can See Them ̿'̿'\̵͇̿̿\з=( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)=ε/̵͇̿̿/'̿̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ DUDE̿̿ ̿̿ ̿'̿'\̵͇̿̿\з=( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)=ε/̵͇̿̿/'̿̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ PLEASE NO COPY PASTERONI MACORONI DONGERIN

( ͝° ͜ʖ͡°) Mom always said my donger was big for my age ( ͝° ͜ʖ͡°)

Thats so cool! You should write a book or do a screen play

- mod santa