Tumgik
#practice saying 'i'm ace and i love that about myself!' out loud today
illyaana · 3 years
Text
4 to 10 - Sugawara Koushi
Tumblr media
credits to @kvsagi for the Suga art!
Tags: Timeskip! Sick Suga x Doctor! Reader, No Specific Gender for Reader, Angst
Synopsis: Suga has been diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis ever since he was 18, a few days after he graduated from high school. He works as an author in the hospital room he currently lives in. When he was 26, you entered the hospital as an official resident doctor and you were assigned to him.
In the beginning, it was just wheezing. After serving a ball to the ace, Suga just needed a few minutes to breathe air back into his system - nothing else.
It slowly became long nights of consistent coughing. It was just a dust allergy - nothing more. Almost all his family members had it - his allergic reactions were just stronger.
It became shorter hours of practice and any forms of exercise. His lungs were just weaker than the rest of the team's. It didn't mean that he was not as skilled as them - he just had to work more efficiently - more success, less time.
Then came the first lung infection.
Then the next.
Then the next.
Then the next.
It was no longer something he could just write off anymore.
Then came the tests; one sweat test and one genetic test.
The next time people saw him, he carried a bag connected to a tube that was in his nose.
He could still live his life normally - he just needed regular checkups. The only thing he needed to do was keep his distance, keep clean and not mess up.
That's all he needed to do, right?
The attacks got worse and worse.
His lungs became so fragile the slightest amount of dust or germ could kill him.
If he wanted to live, he needed to live in the hospital.
Until his clock stopped working, he needed to stay in the white walls of the Hospital of Tokyo forever - and that is what he did.
For the next 8 years of his life, he stayed in the hospital as a 'permanent resident' and lived peacefully.
His life consisted of college online, eating, studying, cleaning his lungs, talking with the other 'permanent residents' or just 'guests', playing with kids in the pediatric ward and sleep.
That was his life - and he didn't hate it.
He soon graduated from college and university and became an author - a well-known one, may I add.
He still talked to his friends from high school - Daichi and Asahi being common visitors with the occasional visit from Kageyama and Hinata.
This was his life until his life ended.
But all that changed when you came into the hospital for the first time.
Sugawara was never one to eye at the doctors or the nurses in the hospital - he believed that it was irrational and very wrong. Yet, you somehow changed his mind almost instantly.
He couldn't muster the bravery to even welcome you on your first day by himself, despite everyone who knew him literally pushing him to do so.
He begged all of the nurses to introduce him to you, but they all wanted him to do it by himself.
"Staring at our newest doctor, huh?" said Sugawara's doctor, Hizashi Yamada from behind him.
"You want me to introduce you to them?" He asked, smiling deviously.
Soon, Suga's doctor brought him to meet you, despite all of Suga's resistance to it.
"Hello, Y/N-sensei. Welcome to the Hospital of Tokyo. It is a pleasure to have someone so well-versed in our hospital as a permanent doctor," said Hizashi-sensei.
He placed his hand out, only for you to shake it. "No need for the praises, Yamada-sensei. The fact you recognized me is a privilege itself."
"This," Yamada-sensei pulled Suga forward, "Is Sugawara Koushi. He has been admitted to our hospital ever since he was eighteen."
Suga blushed furiously.
He wasn't ready to meet you up close so quickly. He wanted to admire you from afar for at least another two more days so that he could learn about your interests, but fate wasn't on his side this time.
Not to mention, you were a doctor, too! One of the younger ones, too... and hotter...
Suga awoke from his daze when he saw your gloved hand reach out to his to give him a handshake. "Pleasure to meet you, Sugawara-san. I believe you are an author? My sister loves your books!"
Suga was internally thanking Daichi for telling him to become an author.
Suga raised his hand to meet yours in a handshake. "The pleasure is all mine."
"As you both know, I am retiring this year," Yamada-sensei said, making both you and Suga face him.
"I've discussed with the board. Y/N-sensei, you'll be in charge of Suga starting tomorrow. I will send all the information about his condition soon," He ended off with a smile.
Wait - you were in charge of him?
Suga was shaking even more now.
It would no longer be Yamada-sensei seeing the uglier side of him but the very person he was developing a crush on.
"Fate works in mysterious ways, huh?" you said, breaking Suga's train of thought.
"I guess it was good I met you today then, Sugawara-san," you ended with a cheerful smile.
"I leave myself in your care then, Y/N-sensei," Suga said while bowing to you.
"Just call me Y/N. I think you're older than me, anyway," you said, laughing a bit. "I'll see you tomorrow!"
You walked towards the nurses that were calling you, leaving an extremely red Sugawara in the middle of the foyer.
The next day stood as a challenge for the silver-haired male.
He was going to act as good as he can so that your job could be as simple as it can be - no cheeky comments, no playful jokes.
Just being a boring, normal patient for the few hours you'd be in his room.
Well, that resolve almost failed immediately when you came in and begged for a conversation with him.
"It's too quiet for me to work properly, Sugawara-san. I know you think that keeping the room quiet helps, but the tension in the room is a bit too strong for me to work normally," you said, aching for some noise to come out of him.
But he didn't say anything - not even a noise.
"If you don't say anything in the next few minutes, I am going to begin talking a bit too much and trust me, you don't want that."
You turned to prepare the machine to remove the excess mucus in his lungs.
"You can call me Suga-san if you want," Suga whispered, scared to speak as loud as he usually does.
You chuckled and turned to face him. "I was going to call you Koushi-kun, whether you liked it or not."
"So, Koushi-kun," you started, "where and when does this author's life begin?"
He chuckled softly. "I was actually born in Miyagi. I was a replacement setter for the volleyball team in my school. Then again, I played a few times even when our main setter was there."
"What school?"
"Karasuno."
You opened your eyes in shock. "Wait - you were part of the Karasuno's volleyball team that went to nationals back then!"
He stared at your wonder-filled eyes and smiled. "Yeah, I was."
"So you know Hinata Shoyo and Kageyama Tobio? The Japan players?"
Pride swelled in him when he heard those two names. "Yeah, I do. I actually taught Hinata the basics."
"You've done well, my friend," you said, earning a laugh from the 26-year old.
And that small conversation began the long conversations you both had when you were doing long hours in the hospital.
After handling other patients, you'd often spend time with Koushi in his room with the pretence of 'I'm his doctor - it's my duty to be with him most of the time.'
But that was far from the truth, wasn't it?
You were developing feelings for your own patient.
How could you not fall for him?
Behind the beautiful exterior of his was a man of true beauty itself.
He was a hard worker - spent most of his time working on his new project.
He was kind - helped the nurses with managing the kids in the pediatric ward when they went for their lunch break.
He was the ideal man for anyone.
Time passed and you had been taking care of the former setter for the past two years.
He introduced you to his friends - Asahi, Daichi, Kageyama and Hinata, if you remember correctly - when they came over.
They soon became close friends of yours too - despite your fangirling over the Japan volleyball players. They often spent hours on end with Suga in his room.
All of you enjoyed the small talks you all had together and talked about the things happening in the outside world - be it a small injury or someone's wedding.
"Y/N-san, what about you? Are you in a relationship?" the orange-haired man asked, a small yet beaming smile on his lips.
You instantly blushed and looked at Sugawara. His eyes focused solely on you, taking you in.
"I've been single my whole life. I don't think I'd be getting into a relationship soon, too. The doctor's life doesn't really revolve around romance, despite all the TV shows and movies," you ended, earning snickers from almost everyone in the room.
"How about the rest of you? Is there a conquest of love happening in your lives?" you asked. Now my turn to grin.
Both Kageyama and Hinata stared at one another, faces beet red.
Koushi sighed. "Why can't you both just tell that you're a couple? We all knew ever since high school."
"How did you all know?" Kageyama shouted. You immediately shushed him, earning a small 'sorry' from him.
"You both aren't quiet in the storage room, you know?" Daichi said. Everyone except the couple began laughing hysterically.
"Damn, the money I'd get if I leaked this to the news," you jokingly said, teasing the two players.
When the clock showed 8pm, you pushed the four of the visitors out of Suga's room.
Their time had ended and they needed to head home.
Once they left, you felt a tug on your doctor's coat. You saw Koushi asking you back into the room, not ready for you to leave yet.
"Is everything okay?" You asked him, worried about his health.
"Do you feel like there isn't enough oxygen in your tank? I can always get you a replacement right now-" Koushi placed his finger on your lips.
"Please, just listen to what I have to say," he asked, his eyes begging you to listen to him.
You closed the door behind the two of you. He pulled you to sit beside him on his bed.
"I know I don't have much time left. I already had 10 years after diagnosis when the norm is 4," he said, chuckling.
You wanted to intervene - hell, the sentence was already prepared in your head - but you didn't. From what it looked like, he wanted you to just accept whatever he had to say.
"My drive to write is long gone - I can barely write a sentence I like anymore. I love playing with the kids, but I feel like I would just disturb them rather than entertaining them. I - I feel my life slipping away from my fingers, Y/N..." he said, tears forming around his eyes.
"Yet, when I see you walk along the halls of the hospital, I feel re-energized. I only met you two years ago, but I already am so dependant on you - and not just as a doctor. You are the only thing that makes me want to get up in the morning. You are the only thing I think of when I fall asleep. You are..." he gripped on your wrist, "the only thing I want right now."
"Koushi-kun..."
"I love you, Y/N. I didn't want you to leave today without knowing this. I love you so much - as a doctor and as a person."
You hugged the male in front of you, letting his tears fall on your jacket.
"I know you can't reciprocate my feelings, but I just needed you to know."
You gripped on his shirt.
This was the only man you've ever wanted, but you could never have him.
You held your tears back as you walked out of his room.
The next day was just a blur.
The mucus in his lungs built up at an extremely fast pace.
A severe infection formed in his lungs.
You rushed from your apartment to the hospital to conduct surgery as fast as you could.
Luck, however, wasn't on your side.
In the midst of the surgery, the electrocardiogram flatlined.
Sugawara Koushi was pronounced dead at 3:45 am at the Hospital of Tokyo on the 19th of December in the year 2022.
I hope you enjoyed the fanfic! As always, if you have ideas or tropes you'd like me to try, don't hesitate to leave a suggestion here! Thanks for all the reblogs and the likes too! <3 If you want to learn about Cystic Fibrosis, I watched this video and it helped me in understanding the science part of it~
19 notes · View notes