#so i guess i’m just burnt out of that

[cuppajj]

damn

#burnout has been stretching man and I feel really bad #no energy for AF attacks which is what I was hoping would change it #no energy for ocs or canons or mercy or animating either #I know I have to wait for all of that motivation to come back but man it’s been taking forever #and the longer I’m burnt out the more bad I feel about it like augh I could be getting so much done rn #its just not a fun feeling #i hope my insp comes sooner and stays for more than a day or so #what is it about summer and killing my energy lmao #vent #I guess

[iamthemaestro]

how can I have so many ideas but also NO IDEAS

#I’m back in my hating music phase sorry #it’s just so incredibly frustrating the concept is 100% but I literally cannot come up with anything #I’ve been putting off trying so I’ve been like ‘well just try you don’t even know if it’s going to be hard’ #guess what. it’s just as hard as it’s been for the past three years I’ve been massively burnt out #I hate it here why do I even do this #this was supposed to be funny but it’s actually not that funny anymore I’m so tired of only ever being able to force myself to create #nothing I do is ever all that good. like it’s fine. but in the past three years I’ve written one (1) piece I’m actually proud of #and I’ve written at least like seven pieces #which is not even a lot compared to most people who do what I do #anyway. the tags kind of got away from me. I think I should stop for tonight #meanwhile I only spent like 15 minutes on it and that was enough to genuinely upset me #mine

[frozenjokes]

if I write another 5k fic within the span of two days I’m going to vomit

#this is a joke btw #I’ve been doing this for like months and somehow I’m still fucking going #genuinely do not know how I’m not burnt out I’m literally just built better I guess #anyway fic update tomorrow 🥰 #not either of the two popular ones though so you two simmer down #neglected for a month fic getting so well deserved attention

[raplinesmoon]

i think the thing that no one tells you about being forced into being a high achieving child/teen is how much it comes to fuck you over later in life when you can’t do anything without holding yourself to an insane level of perfectionism and then you realize it’s basically leeched all the fun out of any hobbies you created for yourself and left you with a shell of a personality

#like I was having this convo with my mom about how I used to do so much in high school and college #and granted a lot of it was to look smart or well rounded for college and dental school apps which is I guess it’s own thing #but now that I don’t have another goal to work towards my life feels more stagnant and I guess I feel like more of a failure? #even though that’s absolutely not true I just see other people always on the grind and feel guilty for not wanting to do as much anymore #bc I’m tired and burnt out from everything #and the worst part is that it extended into my hobbies too #like I used to love baking and painting and being creative until I just set such insane standards for myself #like if something wasn’t perfect or aesthetic or worthy of being displayed as like a trophy #my effort and the process and time invested into it counts for nothing #not to be controversial but sometimes writing feels that way too #i think it’s a mental battle I have with myself but it makes me sad how many hobbies I used to have and enjoyed #that were then destroyed by burn out and perfectionism and imposter syndrome #this turned into a rant #will probably delete later #but I just had to say it somewhere #isi rambles

[raeathnos]

.

#bad news lads #they cancelled my interview because the position’s been filled #I wanna scream 🫠 #I’ve been up since like 2:30 am because anxiety over it #I’m exhuasted and frustrated and just burnt out I guess #it’s been almost four months of me applying places #I’m just so… tired I guess #I’m trying to stay positive and be like well I’ll find something and it’ll be better but like #the pay was above average and it was literally just down the street from my husband’s job #it was perfect #I mean I’m at the point where as long as I’m not doing customer service and it’s full time and it pays at least a little better #then im applying to it but just its rough out there #tired and frustrated and I hate it #this is an expensive area to live in and no one pays a liveable wage #we’re trying to move to Maryland cause we like it and it’s cheaper but it costs money to do that too #I feel like I’ve been down on my luck/stuck at rock bottom for years and just like #when does it get better #I had a mental breakdown yesterday and like I know that’s part of why I’m feeling so down atm #but it’s rough #I feel like a failure yet again #I know I’ll find something eventually and there’s more opportunities #but I’m just tired of waiting

[nctjpeg]

#so lately i’ve been thinking about a lot… #because i know i’m in a better place than i was at 12 or 14 or 21 or whatever #i have some of the things that i always wanted at those times in my life #i have an active social life and people constantly compliment me for my fashion and makeup and the way i look #but inside i STILL feel like shit!! #and i feel like i’m being melodramatic too bc it’s not like i suddenly became a celebrity or anything crazy like that #but i did go from 200 followers on IG to over 700 in about a year so idk if that illustrates anything #so like. people like me. people know who i am. people want to see me at events. #but i’m overwhelmed i’m burnt out & i feel like an outsider #and it makes me think how honestly? the times i’ve enjoyed myself the most were when i went to things and did things alone #maybe i was happier being that quiet girl standing against the wall? #my correct music opinions #sometimes i just want to disappear #not in the ‘i wanna die’ way but i guess i wish i could take a hiatus from being perceived

[gregthesillyone]

hi, sorry i’ve been kinda inactive recently, here’s some ocs because their canon birthday was yesterday

also!!! happy belated birthday to kel from the hit game omori!!! art block is kicking my ass still so i wasn’t able to make a drawing for him unfortunately, but at least i recently started writing the first draft of the kel-centric au i’m working on!!!! i’m so excited omg

#my art #oc art #oc artwork #original character #LOOK AT THEM!!!!!!!! #it took a lot of courage to post this tbh #i’ve never shared or talked about my ocs or any stories of mine publicly before #that and i feel like i’m disappointing people by not posting something related to omori like i usually do #i feel like that’s what people expect from me and that not posting that is letting them down #so it makes it hard to branch out even though i really want to #but i know that’s not true and i want to overcome that #idk. i guess i’ve just been really burnt out recently #but anyways sorry for the long vent(?) lmao #i tried something new with the lighting!! it’s a little lazy but i wanted to make it look like a spotlight/flash of a camera #i just liked the vibe it added #it made it feel kinda nostalgic imo #ask me about their lore PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

[c0rrupted-mov]

I would love to participate in artfight but I’m afraid it’s a bit too much for me 😵‍💫 I can’t finish some pieces for months sometimes, it’s impossible for me to draw several things a day everyday it will break me 😭

#even I I would find motivation to do it I’m sure I would be SO burnt out after #idk the idea sounds so fun but I guess I just can’t kfkfkdmfkd #ramblings

[arthur-r]

need to poll my friends, does anybody drink black coffee like just coffee from inside of a coffee pot and you don’t put anything in it?

#haven’t tried black coffee since i was like ten and i hated it then and now i have mixed feelings #the biggest problem was that it is way too warm i am all burnt up now #that’s what milk is for really is just to drown out the heat turn it into a regular temperature beverage #anyway it tastes well enough and i guess the point of black coffee is it gets the job done #that being said caffeine usually makes me feel unwell so don’t ask me why i went for it today #pro tip if you don’t want to aggravate somebody’s heart problems don’t pour coffee near them when they’re sleeping #(‘‘sleeping’’ what i mean is eyes closed head on desk still perceiving things. not strong enough to wake me up from a dream or anything) #anyway if you pour coffee near me and i’m currently tired out of my mind i’m gonna ask to have some there’s no way around it #so um not my fault i was aided and abetted and i play no role in my own destruction #anyway i’m also feeling entirely fine shdhdf i’m nearly convinced it’s been a chocolate allergy this whole time #and if i stop drinking mochas then i’ll stop reacting cause it’s not the caffeine that’s the problem. we’ll find out soon #anyway who drinks this. do my friends drink this?? do my friends have tips on how to drink this #for example how do you make it not be warm but also not be filled up with milk #do you just blow on it. like an old man in a fable about a satyr who thinks humans are the strangest creatures #the taste is kind of epic honestly like it’s not good but it’s kind of good #at the very least it makes me feel like an old academic #anyway hi it’s senior skip day and i’m playing the system by showing up at the school building and skipping from here #shdhdf i’m gonna go to class from here on out though. just had to skip physics cause i never did the essay and i’m afraid of confrontation #that’s also not my fault because who assigns an essay in physics class???? i dont know this stuff well enough to write about it?? #although of course that’s the point of assigning an essay is to see if we know everything well enough to write about it shdhdf #so anyway i’m here to ask my friends who drink black coffee (if there are any) what do you do to help it cross the line to just being good? #cause right now it’s like good in several ways but it’s too warm and it tastes a little bit silly. i need pro tips for college #cause honestly i love the taste of coffee and like i said the chocolate might be the problem so i’m turning away from mochas #probably they’re both a problem. but let’s say i start drinking decaf black coffee. what do i do to make it incredible. please and thanks #shdhdf mostly i’m just checking in though. how is everybody? i really hope you are doing well!!!! #i’ll be around for a bit then heading to humanities class eventually i can’t skip on the teacher who invited me to her book club #also like. lunch. and like i said i have integrity now. gonna go to the rest of my classes #but so anyway i hope everybody is doing well!!!! let me know if you need anything!! listen to corrections by poolboy if you feel like it!! #me. my post. mine. #alright this is my last tag but i’ll be around. hope you are well and let me know!!

[alarrylarrie]

.

#did I just send a snarky email to my boss about how I have too much on my plate #and she has unrealistic expectations #and she should probably back off because everyone I work with is on the verge of quitting? #at 11 pm? #Yes. Yes I did. #and I jokingly say ‘no regrets’ lol but I’m also STRESSED about it #but the truth is I can only do so much #and she IS asking too much of me #and I’m getting super burnt out #and so are my coworkers #so I wasn’t dishonest! #just maybe a little more sassy than I typically am at work #guess we’ll see how well it goes over lol

[d2myg]

lately i’ve been mourning friendships that fizzled out or are in the process of fizzling out, but then i remember that relationships of any kind always go both ways. i stopped trying but so did they.

#the little friend group seems to be just fine without me. #but i guess that’s just life in your twenties #what can you do #but i wonder what happened #the group chat is dead so i wonder if they all just made a new one without me #because they all still hang out and pretty frequently #so like.. what did i do? #i’m the kind of person that will not show up somewhere unless i’m invited and they know it #but i guess i’m not wanted haha #that’s fine though #i miss them but we haven’t seen each other since before christmas #so it feels like it’s too late to try and reach out now #i met up with one friend from this group like 2 months ago and it was fun #but there’s no incentive to hang out now #and like. i’m just tired and burnt out so it’s not like i really want to #but i just miss it #and when they all leave to go back home in a couple of months #maybe i’ll just block all of them and pretend we never met #since i see that i’m so replaceable #i think it’s all a consequence of moving to a different city #even if i live like 20 mins away by train #it seems like such a commute to go there #and it’s not like they want to come here either for a change #i just need to accept the fact they friendships come and go and i can’t do anything about it #it’s been like that all of my life #but why am i getting so sad and sentimental #when i’m going to hang out with so many friends tomorrow for easter. i need to remember that just because some friendships fizzled out #doesn’t mean that the others i still have aren’t just as important and precious #if someone is still reading this wow. you must think i’m so pathetic lmao. but thank you for caring #eli.txt

[bisamwilson]

i think,,, i might have burned myself out

#like i mean. i burnt myself out months ago but like it’s Too Much to be ignored now #gonna try and finish this fic for sam’s birthday and maybe a couple other small ones for sam bingo while it’s still running #but i like almost cried twice while writing this cap birthday fic and i’m not even half done #and it’s not a sad fic so it’s not emotion reasons #i just. haven’t actually liked anything i’ve written since like the star wars au #and i feel like i’m getting repetitive and worse instead of better #and writing feels more like a chore than it does a fun hobby activity #like i was writing a fic and then took a break to take a nap and set an alarm bc i had to get back to writing #i haven’t done that since i was writing essays in college #but always afraid of losing the wonderful community i’ve gathered bc i’m not Producing Content anymore l #idk i’m just. tired and upset and need a break #but taking a break and not taking a break sound equally awful for different reasons #so here i am being dramatic in tumblr tags #anyways gotta go finish that fic i guess see y’all later #mak rants #probably #tbd

[selescope]

i know you have to have lows to have highs but i was feel pretty much straight bliss for like three weeks and now i’m not feeling as great and it’s just. so hard.

#like i know i can’t complain because i’ve been doing so great #but like i’m just #i’m so burnt out #only six more days of school i guess #vent

[heres-to-all-that-is-mine]

#my art! #purples art! #mine! #drew his hair weird 💜 #Gene-Eric rose #generic toppat #ok. so. I am very much in a Podcast Era rn okay I am so #I am. hooked #on these funny little people speaking (and screaming in agony/rage/excitement) directly into my brain #this has nothing to do with Gene I just felt the need to say so #podcast fixations. for me. are VERY DIFFICULT ENDEAVOURS. #cause how the FUCK do I draw people with no appearances!! nothing I try seems to fit!!! they are Voices to me #which leaves fanfiction as my Option. but I am not good at fanfiction #because 1. insecurity i guess and 2. Saint Damien above I burn out so fast #gah. #also I’m sorry dear people who enjoyed my transit error fic I’ve been trying to work on the next chapter but again I am so burnt out #and also so very occupied by my interests which are not currently submas #funny story. one of my favourite podcast characters is called Balmoral #hilarious right #given the current. context #forgive the essay in the tags Gene is my little rambling guy he enables me #consistent skin/hair colour? for Gene? who’s she?

[aroaessidhe]

2023 reads // twitter thread  

Song Of Silver Flame like Night

YA wuxia/xianxia inspired fantasy

a girl in a colonised country with a mysterious seal on her arm left by her mother before she was killed

when a state magician finds her, she escapes with a boy to his school of secret traditional magic practitioners, and discover the secrets her mother left her

powerful demon gods

#Song Of Silver Flame like Night #aroaessidhe 2023 reads #with the caveat that i am clearly not the audience. i kinda hated this lol #for a few very specific reasons #i think there’s interesting concepts & worldbuilding #but i am just so burnt out on girl-and-boy-with-no-friends-and-instant-attraction-travelling-together as the centre of a story yknow #this random girl dies and then after she’s referring to her as her best friend but like….i didn’t get that from their single conversation. #it almost feels like shoved in last minute because of feedback of no other female friendships #when there’s finally another woman it’s the stereotype of a mean girl. and they are just calling each other bitches and whores….like jesus… #she is so one dimensional but also in concept she is 20x cooler than the mc sorry i’m rooting for her now #from the end seems like they’ll be forced to work together and probably become reluctant allies/friends in book 2 or something but like…. #if that was intended from the beginning you have to make the initial hatred make sense in the first place #also boys getting all embarrassed by periods……it’s 2023. come on. it's not cute and endearing. #if ur looking for dragons bc of the cover. there are barely dragons. the one shows up in like the last chapter #also the audiobook narration is one of those where the normal narration is a normal voice but the dialogue is so cartoony? #like the girls have such high pitched voices.the boys have the deeper voice. except for like random side boys who have comical ones. #idk none of them sound like real people #things i did like: the magic i guess. though to be quite honest the colonisers metal based magic seemed more original and interesting asdhgf #i thought there were some interesting elements to the dudes backstory #oh another thing i disliked is theres a side character with a cleft lip and the MC brings it up EVERY TIME like like.....what. #every time she sees him shes like. ppl used to discriminate #against this and call them (a bunch of slurs) and say they're cursed but actually maybe it's just a scar. people used to call them slurs btw #. i am going to bring this up every time i look at them.

[lvllns]

well that post made me realize i have entirely fallen out of love with having horses and i don’t know what to do about that

#reed.txt #they’ve been my life for 31 years i have literally always had a horse #and i’m just so burnt out and tired that i. don’t want to do that anymore. #and it doesn’t even hurt or sting i just feel relieved at the idea of not owning a horse at all #and that’s. weird. #anyway i need to figure out how to market charlie I guess wish me luck