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ladyswillmart · 5 months

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"Ha HAA—! Take that! Again!" Mallow crowed, breathless with the rush of a battle well-fought.

Without so much as a final Nya, Bowyer Mk. II—his warranty thoroughly voided—collapsed to the ground in a chaotic jumble of bare steel and unfinished wood, a satisfying if somewhat wan imitation of his predecessor's demise back in the Forest Maze.

Goodness, that seemed like ages ago...

"Hey, remember the very first time we did that? I never thought I'd ever get to do anything that cool!" he went on. "I think it was Geno's idea, wasn't it?"

"Oh yeah, that's right..." said Geno, wistfully. "Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. I guess Bowyer had to learn that the hard way."

"Y'know, I still can't believe you actually thought we'd be strong enough to make a good team! I mean, Mario's pretty tough and he's the real deal—like I wouldn't wanna have to face him in a kick fight or anything. But me? I mean, all this time traveling with the master and I still can't even jump a foot to save my life!"

Kick fight...? Geno shook his head and decided to let that one go—life on the road tended to engender a certain fondness for watching midnight kung fu comedies on whatever UHF frequencies their motel room television set could receive. "Well, so what if you can't jump? You think you could've journeyed with us for so long and so far, all the way to this miserable scrap heap at the other end of the galaxy, if you weren't also the real deal yourself, in your own way?" he posed. "Though that does remind me of something. I keep meaning to ask how you do that thing where you read other people's minds. Is that for real?"

Mallow broadened his smile, revealing his single, cherished tooth. "Sure is! But I don't really know how I do it," he admitted. "I guess I start out by thinking real hard. Then I just keep thinking and thinking, until I thunk so hard that I start thinking inside-out in someone else's head. Sorry, I can't explain it any better than that."

"That's alright. It's pretty useful, either way," said Geno, however disinclined to repeat Mallow's process and thunk that hard about any one thing in particular.

"You're tellin' me!" said Mallow. "I even used it to save you once!"

"Is that right?"

"Yeah! Don't you remember that one time you got eaten by Belõme?"

Geno grimaced to the best of his ability. "Ah. Yes, I was trying to forget that, actually..."

"And then he made that weird copy of you, and it was so good we couldn't tell which one was the real you and which one was the fake? Remember?" Mallow recounted the tale with a whole lot of relish, which was jolly well and good for him as he—by some highly improbable turn of RNG—missed out on the unforgettable experience of becoming that monster's afternoon snack.

"I remember."

"Well, obviously we had to clobber one of ya! But we couldn't figure out which one was the clone! And then you both started trying real hard to convince us who was real and who was fake, and then you both had your guns out and pointed dead on each other like—"

"—yes, yes, I remember, I promise I remember this entire episode to adequate detail, right down to the music video*," Geno prodded him patiently. "But how did you solve the riddle?"

"Like I said, I did it by reading your minds!" Mallow told him. "Nothing else to it! Look, his thoughts, I could read 'em like a book: What's up with all these Star Pieces? I don't care either way. Or something like that. And I thought: Oh no! That's not the Geno I know! And I was right!"

"Oh! I see..."

"And your thoughts, well! Every time I try to read your thoughts, I just get this really weird noise in my brain," continued Mallow, his enthusiasm blinding him to his own unwise treading. "And I can't figure out what the noise is, y'know? I can't even describe it, it just gives me a bad headache if I listen too long—"

"—w-wait a minute! Hold up. What do you mean, every time you try to—" Geno stammered his way into a forced restart. "Do you try to read our thoughts, like, regularly, or...?"

Caught! All Mallow could do was shuffle sheepishly in place and grin, and wonder if he could somehow fit his whole entire foot into his mouth if he thunk hard enough about it...

(* Yes, every episode of the Super Mario RPG Super Show features a brief musical montage, using thematically appropriate hit songs by popular contemporary artists, that will have unforeseeable consequences when people try to archive this series on YouTube several decades later...)

#super mario rpg #super mario rpg spoilers #next episode: mallow learns a lesson about respecting privacy and not reading your friends' minds #musical montage is a comedy chase sequence set to huey lewis's 'hip to be square'#coming soon to a copyright struck youtube video near you!

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loverssuper · 2 years

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Download tp link powerline utility

Wrong firmware upgrade may damage your device and void the warranty.

Please verify the hardware version of your device for the firmware version.

Please click here to change site if necessary.

Please upgrade firmware from the local TP-Link official website of the purchase location for your TP-Link device, otherwise it will be against the warranty.

IMPORTANT: To prevent upgrade failures, please read the following before proceeding with the upgrade process What can i do if PLC utility for Windows cannot be installed on Windows 8.1? 11-29-2016 40821Ĭan several Powerline networks exist simultaneously in same power circuit? 11-25-2014 68621Ī firmware update can resolve issues that the previous firmware version may have and improve its current performance. Why can’t the Powerline Adapter be detected by the others? 12-19-2016 72771 How to Leave a Powerline network by Pair Button? 12-19-2016 37495 How to configure TP-Link Powerline utility to secure my power line network? 01-03-2017 187394 How can I copy the wireless setting from the front router using Wi-Fi Clone button? 06-22-2017 219170

How to reset a device using tpPLC Utility (new logo)? 07-11-2017 67785 How to update the firmware using tpPLC Utility (new logo)? 09-12-2017 115220 How to Reset the Powerline Adapters to Factory Defaults? 09-14-2017 252866 What do TP-Link Powerline adapter’s LED lights stand for? 09-14-2017 986893 How do I configure the wireless settings on the Powerline Extender if there is no WPS button on my router? 09-14-2017 471419 What can I do if I can't have Internet connection after connected to powerline adapter？ 09-14-2017 220663 How to set up QoS using tpPLC Utility (new logo)? 09-06-2019 53984 How to prepare for using the tpPLC Utility (new logo)? 09-06-2019 241362 How to rename a device on tpPLC Utility (new logo)? 09-06-2019 71659 How to Reset the Powerline Adapter to Factory Default? 01-02-2021 120149 Powerline adapters may cause intermittent connection of DSL modem router in a few rare cases 02-05-2021 20182 How to build a roaming wireless network between your wireless router and TP-Link Wi-Fi Powerline Extender? 03-26-2021 186594Įxplanation about the Powerline Rate and Actual speed of the Powerline Adapters 03-19-2021 56391 How to add an extra powerline adapter to the existing powerline network with pair button? 05-20-2021 327105 What can I do if my client can’t roam between my wireless router and TP-Link AP & Range Extender product? 07-20-2021 159480Īre the TP-Link powerline adapters compatible with each other? 06-21-2021 11838 How to set a new powerline network name using tpPLC Utility (new logo)? 07-20-2021 92392 How to add a device to the network using tpPLC Utility (new logo)? 07-20-2021 101810 How to customize wireless settings on tpPLC Utility (new logo)? 07-20-2021 93396 What can I do if my powerline rate is very low? 07-20-2021 163382 Most frequently asked questions about TP-Link powerline devices 07-23-2021 1088938 How many Powerline adapters can be added to the same network? 08-30-2021 254830

Feature Filter: All Before You Buy User Application RequirementUS Q&A of functional explanation or specification parametersUS Configuration GuideUS TroubleshootingUS FAQs

#Download tp link powerline utility

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nahasdyna · 2 years

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2009 mac mini ram upgrade

#2009 mac mini ram upgrade upgrade#

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To open the Mini up, you need the stupid putty knife method - the person who designed this case is a complete idiot. Touch some metal objects to discharge any static. Now shutdown the computer and remove all peripherals and power leads. Reboot the machine holding alt (the alt-key on the new keyboard works finally) and make sure you can boot from the external drive. Download Carbon Copy Cloner (CCC) or SuperDuper - I used CCC - and clone your internal onto the external drive. Format the external drive as GUID partition map (important!) and HFS+ Extended Journaled with disk utility. When you get all the parts, put the drive into the enclosure and plug it into your new machine, which you should have setup (don't setup Bootcamp yet though).

#2009 mac mini ram upgrade mac#

I also got a cheap Mac compatible 2.5" SATA enclosure from ebay for under £10: I opted for 4GB RAM (check Crucial for the right kind) and a 250GB 7200rpm Hitachi Travelstar hard drive (they are supposed to be quieter than Seagates and I can verify they are pretty quiet).

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What you will need to do first of all is buy your upgrade parts.

#2009 mac mini ram upgrade plus#

What I did was upgrade to 4GB Ram and a 250GB 7200rpm drive for £630 plus I can get £50 back, which I'll explain so overall £580 The 4GB Ram upgrade costs £120 and a 250GB 5400rpm drive is £80. The base Mini is 2GHz Core 2 Duo for £499. If you're not sure about it, pay an Apple Certified Tech to do the upgrade for you but then you won't save much money.Īpple's upgrade prices on the Mini are quite expensive so this can save you some money. There are actually no stickers inside that you have to break to change the RAM or HDD and I didn't find it to be all that bad. If you plan on upgrading yourself, doing any damage inside can void your warranty. Learn more about the new iMac on the Apple site.I thought I would provide a few tips for upgrading the 2009 Mac Mini, which some guides don't cover fully. Delivery will begin the second half of May. You'll be able to pre-order the new 24" iMac next Friday at 8 AM EDT. It's an easy decision that will future-proof your system and deliver performance gains as well. For the top-tier iMac, which already has 512GB of storage, that means spending $200 to increase it to 1TB. That's why I recommend you spend your upgrade money on doubling your SSD storage. Also, if your SSD is full, that means your system can't swap out some of that memory to boost performance as needed. Sure, you can plug an external SSD into one of the Thunderbolt ports for fast transfer (and I'll have a list of excellent ones for you in the near future) but it's not as fast as on-chip storage. While upgrading your storage drive was possible (albeit difficult) with previous iMacs, it's impossible to do so with the new M1 chips. Even offloading storage to my iCloud Drive, I've still nearly filled the entirety of my 1TB SSD drive. While you might not need more than 8GB of unified memory in your new iMac there is one thing that you should immediately upgrade when you configure your new machine.Ĭhances are your current system's storage is already bursting with documents, images, movies, and apps. But your money could be spent better elsewhere. If you have the money, there's no reason to not upgrade. For most users 8GB is going to be more than enough for day-to-day computing tasks. With a unified memory upgrade being so cheap, you might wonder why I'd recommend not spending the money. This number is far from the wallet-blistering Apple-tax that upgraders used to pay for factory RAM. You can upgrade to 16GB for a measly $200. However, if you're editing large 4K videos or doing other extremely intensive tasks, you might benefit from additional unified memory in your system.

#2009 mac mini ram upgrade pro#

Reviews of the first M1 systems (the MacBook Pro and Mac Mini) show that Apple has finally been able to create a system with a base of 8GB of RAM that not only performs well but outperforms previous systems with twice as much RAM (also, it's called "unified memory" now). Everything just works together and borrows processing from each other as needed. The CPU and GPU aren't both trying to access data pathways on the logic board. There's no memory swapping or rewriting of data between your RAM and SSD. The M1 chip can dynamically use whatever it needs, from whichever component it needs, instantaneously. Having everything on a single chip changes that fundamentally. RAM is a system's short term memory and having lots of it means you can do more and larger tasks simultaneously without slowing things down. Traditional thinking has always said, add as much RAM as you can afford. But the more I researched the new M1 chip and how it's performed in the new MacBook Pro and Mac Mini, the less concerned I was. As someone who falls into that category, I expected to be more upset at the change.

#2009 mac mini ram upgrade

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holidaysbanana · 2 years

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Macbook air ssd upgrade 2016

#Macbook air ssd upgrade 2016 how to#

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Installing a third-party SSD into your Mac may void your warranty, so follow these steps carefully or enlist a professional.

#Macbook air ssd upgrade 2016 pro#

Once you’ve backed up your data, you can proceed with your MacBook Pro hard drive replacement. Remove the hard drive from your MacBook Pro You can easily do this using the Disk Utility app, following the steps for the Restore function, or use a backup app like Time Machine to clone your hard drive.

#Macbook air ssd upgrade 2016 how to#

Here’s how to upgrade the hard drive on your MacBook Pro to an SSD: Clone your existing hard driveīefore upgrading, clone your existing hard drive so that you don’t lose any valuable data. All MacBook Pros with retina displays are already equipped with an SSD. Macs from 2017 or later may not be able to be upgraded this way due to the device’s design - check if your MacBook Pro will allow hard drive replacement. To upgrade your MacBook Pro to an SSD, there are a few steps you need to take. How to upgrade the hard drive on a MacBook Pro To replace your Mac’s hard drive, you’ll need to have:Ī screwdriver and extra screws (mainly Phillips and Torx, of varying sizes).Ī spudger to maneuver your device’s little nooks and crannies.Ĭomputer cleaning supplies, such as canned air and a microfiber cloth, to keep your device dust-free.

#Macbook air ssd upgrade 2016 portable#

However, a portable SSD can be connected via a high-speed external port, so there are still options to upgrade your SSD if your Mac is from 2017 or later. How to Upgrade Your Mac with an SSD Drive | Avast Logo Ameba Icon Security Icon Security White Icon Privacy Icon Performance Icon Privacy Icon Security Icon Performance Icons/45/01 Security/Other-Threats Icons / 32 / Bloatware removal Icons / 32 / Registry Cleaner Icons / 32 / CleanUp Icons / Feature / 32 / Mac Icons / 32 / Browser cleanup Icons/32/01 Security/Malware Icons/32/01 Security/Viruses Icons/32/01 Security/Other-Threats Icons/32/01 Security/Passwords Icons/32/01 Security/Ransomware Icons/32/01 Security/Business Icons/32/02 Privacy/Browser Icons/32/02 Privacy/IP adress Icons/32/02 Privacy/VPN Icons/32/02 Privacy/Proxy Icons/32/02 Privacy/Streaming Icons/32/03 Performance/Celaning Icons/32/03 Performance/Drivers Icons/32/03 Performance/Gaming Icons/32/03 Performance/Hardware Icons/32/03 Performance/Speed Icons / 32 / Bloatware removal Icons / 32 / Registry Cleaner Win Icons / 32 / CleanUp Icons / Feature / 32 / Mac Icons / 32 / Browser cleanup Icons/60/02 Privacy/02_Privacy Icons/60/01 Security/01_Security Icons/60/03 Performance/03_Performance Icons/80/01 Security/IoT Icons/80/01 Security/Malware Icons/80/01 Security/Passwords Icons/80/01 Security/Ransomware Icons/80/01 Security/Viruses Icons/80/01 Security/Other-Threats Icons/80/03 Security/Business Icons/80/02 Privacy/Browser Icons/80/02 Privacy/IP adress Icons/80/02 Privacy/VPN Icons/80/02 Privacy/Proxy Icons/80/02 Privacy/Streaming Icons/80/03 Performance/Celaning Icons/80/03 Performance/Drivers Icons/80/03 Performance/Gaming Icons/80/03 Performance/Hardware Icons/80/03 Performance/Speed Icons/80/03 Performance/03_Performance Icons/80/02 Privacy/02_PrivacyĪpple’s changes to the design and construction of its computers have made Mac hard drive replacement practically impossible in Macs made after 2016.

#Macbook air ssd upgrade 2016

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keeperfacts · 2 years

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4 Best Apps for Movies on a Jailbroken Amazon Firestick

Amazon Firestick is one of the most popular streaming devices for watching free movies, live sports, and TV shows. One of the USPs of these devices is that it converts a traditional TV into a smart one. You can stream movies and TV shows in 4k quality. You can also watch a lot of content for free if you have the right apps and add-ons. Firesticks are cheaper, reliable, and fast devices. That is why they are winning the market. However, Firestick devices also come with some limitations, like you can not install third-party applications on them. Is It Possible to Install Third-Party Applications on Your Firestick Device? Yes, you can download and install third-party applications on your Amazon Firestick. This process is called sideloading apps. You can sideload these third-party apps to your Firestick device by jailbreaking it. Jailbreaking a Firestick means sideloading third-party apps and some modifications to the system settings. You might need to modify system settings like installing apps from unknown resources, ADB debugging, device data usage, and collect app usage data option. You can find all these options in the settings tab of your Firestick device. Best Apps to Stream Movies on a Jailbroken Firestick 1) Cinema APK (Free) Cinema HD is a new app but is becoming more popular daily. It went viral after Terrarium TV shut down its services. It gives you endless content making it one of the leading entertainment apps for Firestick devices. One of the USPs of this app is that it gives you constant updates because it has an active team of developers. They keep the app and content up to date. The Cinema HD app provides streaming links to you from several servers. This app gives you the option to save videos to watch later. You can also use third-party media players and subtitles in this app. It also provides streaming links from apps like Hulu and Netflix. 2) Cyberflix TV CyberFlix TV is one of the clones of the Terrarium TV if nothing else. It looks like the Terrarium TV, works like it, and more importantly, the content library is also the same. It is also a scraper-based app that fetches streaming links from unlimited sources(like Terrarium TV resources). It also allows you to sign in with your Real-Debrid account. You can enter the login details and access streams in 4k quality. You might want to turn off the collect app usage data option from the settings tab of your Firestick device. You don’t need to modify system-level code to change this setting. It is a simple step that does not mess with your system code and does not void your warranty. Amazon collects your data or online activities of your Firestick device. Changing this setting stops Amazon from doing that. 3) BeeTV (Free) Bee TV provides an endless collection of movies and TV shows. It gives you streaming links from several sources. It also supports Real-Debrid sign-in so that you can get streaming links in HD quality. Bee TV keeps adding new links to update its library. It also categorizes the content to make it easier for users to find their favorite shows and movies. You can also use this app with third-party media players. It also imports posters for you to make it easier to search for content. 4) Kodi (Free) Kodi is an open-source media player available on Firestick devices, android phones, and more platforms. It has an easy-to-use interface. While its other competitors might be good for movies or TV show links only, the Kodi media player also gives music, sports, and more. You can also access local media with this app. You can access local music, photos, and movies to watch them on a large screen. It gives you streaming links to content from Prime Video, Netflix, Hulu, and more. It is a free app with several add-ons. The quality of these add-ons decides the quality of content and overall experience. You might want to be careful with the add-ons you are using. Several add-ons give links to pirated and copyrighted content. Original content owners, ISPs, and governments can take legal action against you if you download and stream illegal content. Using a VPN adds additional security by hiding your IP address. Conclusion Jailbreaking a Firestick changes its overall experience completely. It gives you more streaming and downloading options. However, it also makes your device more vulnerable to malware and viruses by allowing you to install unverified apps. You might want to read carefully about the app you want to install on your device. These unverified apps keep stopping, and their clone apps keep coming. You can use other streaming apps than the four I mentioned. But, these apps are the most reliable and updated for a jailbroken Firestick. Read the full article

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changefield76 · 2 years

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Seven Suggestions That may Change The best way You Best Car Transport Service In India

Actually, it was do-or-die time. In fact, if you don't change your oil on time and with the correct merchandise, it could void your automotive's warranty. Quick ahead 22 years to the economic struggles of 2009 and the inevitability of peak oil prices and it turns into apparent the U.S. Paraffin-based motor oil on the store shelf will include minuscule quantities of wax. Each motor drives a small gear, which meshes with a bigger gear on the axle shaft. Saturn simply wrote new software permitting the ABS laptop to counteract wheel slip in three phases: retard spark timing to cut back engine energy, shift the transmission to the next gear, and interrupt gas stream. The perfect solution to the recharging downside is to take the automobile dwelling in the evening and plug it in, much like the best way you may plug in a laptop computer pc or digital music participant, in order that it may well recharge in a single day. Whether you qualify as a "minister" in accordance with the IRS can have an effect on tax advantages, Social Security taxes and whether you might be exempt from revenue tax withholding. All of us are resorting to processed, packaged, or fast foods, and it’s not wholesome.

For-profit firms are opening up new markets, increasing into opponents' territories and, in some circumstances, merging. To relieve this burden, some enterprising corporations are advertising and marketing audio walking tours. For that they pay to the paid survey firms who in turn pay to the surveyors for taking those surveys. Power and Associates' 1991 surveys of latest-automotive house owners. Drenching rains and muddy fields didn't dampen the family-oriented fun, which included plant tours, picnics, a live performance, and sharing the gospel with fellow house owners and Spring Hill workers. Earlier than driving off, new owners were photographed in their Saturns amid rousing cheers from dealership staff. As a boy growing up in Whittier, California, he loved to visit the Chevrolet dealership where his father labored as a elements department manager. On the expertise aspect have been the misplaced-foam engine casting method, a new water-borne paint course of, and team-oriented meeting techniques, all being adopted or studied by different GM operations. Saturn was informed to double productiveness at Spring Hill, increase manufacturing there by two-thirds whereas cutting employment by 18 percent, and to at least break even on operations -- or else. The Purple Line wasn't the form of automobile Saturn prospects had been used to, but that was the purpose.

Released in fall was a efficiency-minded Sky Crimson Line. Adding visceral appeal at mid-2004 was a racy Ion Pink Line coupe with a supercharged 2.0-liter Ecotec pumping out 205 keen horses. Common or Pink Line, Sky was an thrilling image of a hoped-for Saturn renaissance. But the Honda V-6 made a positive start line for the Vue Purple Line, the first in a deliberate series of sporty Saturn submodels. Individuals had been flocking to car-based mostly "crossover" wagons just like the Ford Escape, Honda CR-V and Toyota RAV4. Intriguingly, the announcement also talked about a "but undisclosed future Saturn" with a Honda V-6. Although those models additionally await history's verdict, they looked to give Saturn the aggressive attain it had so long been denied. Patrons noticed by way of the 1980s-type cloning and mostly stayed away from all 4 fashions. There have been critical issues in regards to the wisdom of making an attempt such a undertaking in the face of the national financial collapse, but the Pennsylvania noticed great future benefits from electrification and decided to proceed. If you select to have your car transported, it is of vital significance to decide on solely the very best transportation firm out there. Copyright Disney/Pixar. All Rights Reserved The film "Vehicles" is the story ofrookie race automotive Lightning McQueen.

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See extra Cars photos. CJ manufacturing can be halted after forty years to free up capability for the way more widespread new XJ-sequence Jeep Wagoneer and Cherokee compact wagons. But it did relax rules on where and the way frequently airways fly and how a lot they cost, thereby stimulating competition and progress. That's why window stickers carry the legend "producer's prompt retail value." However Saturn strongly urged its sellers to keep away from the same old haggling, saying no customer should ever surprise about paying too much. Respondents ranked Saturn third in both buyer satisfaction and sales satisfaction. Gross sales personnel had been educated in "consultative promoting" to replace onerous-promote tactics. https://jetblacktransportation.com/ had been flat in the late 1990s, however sounding a hopeful notice in 2000 was the April 25 announcement of a $1.5-billion money infusion. As well as, Saturn's 4-cylinder automobiles have been incomes helpful company common gasoline financial system (CAFE) credits for GM as a whole to offset sales of fuel-guzzling V-8 fashions, together with a fast-rising variety of thirsty full-size mild trucks.

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dailytechnoreview · 2 years

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Top 8 Advantages of SSD in Laptop

You wouldn’t buy a brand-new car with a Ford Model T engine. So why would you merge onto the information superhighway with a laptop that uses an old-school mechanical hard drive? If you want a fast, responsive notebook and why wouldn’t you have to get a solid-state drive (SSD).

When it comes to overall performance, a laptop’s storage drive is infinitely more important than other components, like its CPU, RAM and graphics chip. As you boot the computer, open applications and switch between tasks, your processor is tapping its fingers waiting for data to load from the disk. Even if you’re not opening files, transferring data or launching apps, your OS and software are using virtual memory (aka swap files) in the background.

With a technology that dates back to the 1950s, hard-disk drives feature a spindle that moves over a rotating magnetic platter grabbing data like an old-school record-player needle drawing sound from a vinyl LP. Here are some of the reasons why you should use an SSD in your laptop.

1. Dramatic Performance Improvements

Because a solid-state drive has no moving parts, it’s able to read and write data infinitely faster than a hard drive. The real-world difference is most noticeable when you’re booting your computer or opening an application.

While you’re sitting there staring at the blue ring of fire in Windows or spinning rainbow beachball on Mac, you’re not only wasting time but losing your train of thought as you scratch your head and whisper “Come on already. I don’t have all day.” With an SSD, the computer can work as fast as you do.

It almost goes without saying that copying files is infinitely quicker with an solid-state drive . Of laptops we reviewed in the past 12 months, models with SSDs copied files at an average rate of 237.8 megabytes per second, while those with hard drives averaged just 33.9 MBps.

2. Battery Life and Durability

If you’re worried about your laptop breaking, you definitely want an solid-state drive . SSDs are much more better than HDD because they don’t have delicate needles and platters.

3. The Cost of SSDs

On manufacturer sites where you can configure a laptop to order, companies such as Dell and Lenovo charge a high premium to upgrade from a hard drive to an solid-state drive , or to move from a smaller SSD to a larger one. For example, if you configure your ThinkPad T460 on Lenovo.com, it costs a full $290 to move from a 500GB hard drive to a 512GB , while a 512GB costs just $125 on the aftermarket. The relatively high cost is why you should either settle for a lower-capacity solid-state drive or consider upgrading the laptop yourself.

4. Can You Upgrade?

Whether you’re buying a new laptop or trying to breathe new life into an older computer, you can save a lot of money by swapping out the preinstalled hard drive or low-capacity SSD for one you buy yourself. Not all laptops are user-upgradable; many have an SSD soldered onto the motherboard or located in a place you can’t access without damaging other components.

Though each laptop is built a little differently, the process of upgrading your storage drive is basically the same. You must first clone the contents of your existing drive using a tool such as EaseUS Todo Backup Free and an external drive enclosure to attach the new drive. After the cloning is finished, you open up the laptop, remove the old drive and pop in the new.

However, many people don’t want to take the risk of opening up their laptops and potentially breaking something. Most manufacturers don’t void your warranty just for changing out the drive, though you’ll want to double-check because some do. Also, if you damage something or have trouble resulting from the upgrade, your warranty and tech support definitely won’t cover it.

5. Storage Space

The lack of storage may be a small hassle, but the increase in speed is worth the trade-off. If you can possibly afford it, 256GB is a lot more manageable than 128GB.

6. eMMC Memory Is Not SSD

The average laptop we tested with eMMC memory notched a lowly transfer rate of 37.8 MBps. However, these systems lasted an average of 8 hours and 52 minutes on our battery test.

7. What Kind of SSD Is Best

However, most mainstream and budget laptops don’t support PCIe-NVMe drives. The Dell XPS 13/15, the Lenovo Yoga 900 and the Razer Blade are examples of laptops that come with PCIe drives as an option. All current MacBooks use PCIe drives as well.

8. Bottom Line

It’s 2022 and there aren’t many good reasons to buy a laptop with a slow-moving, mechanical hard drive. No matter how fast your processor and how sleek your software, you’ll always suffer from frustrating lag if you don’t have an SSD. Making a smart purchase or performing an upgrade after you buy will make that choice more affordable.

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coruscantguard · 4 years

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Jedi June - Day 3 - Teaching/Learning

Tiplar & Commander Doom

Warning for decapitation jokes. A lot of decapitation jokes.

@jedijune

The fact that Doom has taken to Makashi like a fish to water isn't a bad thing, per say— it’s the dueling form, and it’s most likely that the only time Doom will find himself fighting with a lightsaber is during a duel. For Commander Doom's continued survival, his natural affinity for Makashi is an incredible asset. Knight Tiplar is a mature enough Jedi to freely admit that.

However, Tiplee has been looking for a Makashi supporter to back her up in the eternal debate of whether Ataru or Makashi is superior, and Tiplar would rather that supporter not be her Commander. They don't serve often with Aayla, so it would be Tiplee and Doom vs Tiplar, and while Tiplar's confident in her own stubbornness, Doom and Tiplee can be quite a terrifying team.

Knowing the basics of more than one lightsaber form is important anyway, and considering how naturally flippy Doom's fighting style is, Tiplar is pretty sure that he'll like Ataru. Plus, the differences in the clones' training and the Jedi's mean that he'll likely get ideas that she's never even considered before, and it's been forever since she's gotten to actually have fun with her form. Sparring is all well and good, as is cutting off the heads of droids, but she'll always prefer experimenting and simply having fun with it.

It's rare that she has time to have fun now, though. Rare that anyone has time to just have fun.

"I feel like you're trying to get me to cut off my own head," Doom comments as she finishes showing him the kata, his eyebrows scrunched together. "Is decapitation an aspect of the Ataru form? Or is this just personal?"

She doesn't laugh, but she's also pretty sure that he knows her well enough at this point to see the humor in her turn to face him straight on, and the slow tilt of her head. "Commander, have you seen me fighting droids before? Decapitation is absolutely an aspect of Ataru."

" ...Point," he allows after a few seconds of deliberate silence.

“Still, please do try not to cut my head off,” Tiplar says, and her voice is amused despite the stern look she sends him. She flicks off her lightsaber with her thumb, and steps forward to hand it over, making sure to keep the bladed end pointing away from him. “Tiplee will use that as evidence that Makashi is the superior form, and while I have no problem debating that with her, it’ll be humiliating if I literally can't argue back because my head is detached from my body.”

Doom takes her lightsaber with the kind of careful reverence she's come to expect from him, and something deep inside her aches, a swirling mixture of happiness and longing and contentment. “I’ll do my best, sir,” Doom says, and his voice is bland, a stark contrast to his cautious, calculated movements as he shifts and turns on her lightsaber, lowers himself into the kata's opening stance. “The legal repercussions wouldn’t be worth any personal amusement, regardless.”

“The legal repercussions, Doom?”

The look he sends her is all mirth. “Well, stabbing you would void both my warranty and that of your lightsaber."

Tiplar snorts. "Oh Force, imagine having to explain all that to Master Windu. I'd un-join the Force, just so I could rejoin it again as I died again, this time of embarrassment and decapitation." She slowly walks around him, checking his stance. “Shift your center of weight slightly lower... yeah, that's good. You remember how it goes?"

"I do."

"Then I'm just going to back up a little bit..."

"Wow, thanks for the ringing endorsement."

"Oh, of course!"

#jedi knight tiplar #tiplar #commander doom #my writing #doomlar #?#tipdoom #tiplardoom #who even knows #jedi june #this is ridiculous i'm so sorry #i meant to make it better and then i... didn't #these two are just fun okay?!??!

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maulusque · 6 years

Text

clone meme: saying things like “I wasn’t engineered for this” or “this is not within my design specs” or “this is going to void my warranty” when faced with inconvenient tasks that you don’t want to do or unpleasant situations you’d rather not be in

Cody, from behind a mountain of paperwork: I wasn’t engineered for this

Rex, after Ahsoka and Anakin threw him off a fucking wall: pretty sure that voided my warranty

Hardcase, when Rex puts him on custodial duty: this is not within my design specs, sir

Fives, when Krell points his lightsaber at him: watch out, sir, you don’t want to void my warranty

Boil, with Numa climbing all over him and pulling his hair: I WAS NOT ENGINEERED FOR THIS

Kix, sitting down in the mess hall and looking at the rations on his tray: this is going to void my warranty

Rex, 10,000% done, eight hours into a battle and muttering under his breath while shooting droids: “I wasn’t engineered for this shit”

Cody, overhearing him on the comms: YES you WERE

Aayla, to Bly: Commander, did anyone ever tell you you have beautiful eyes?

Bly, internally shutting down: thIS Is nOT WIThin my dESIGn spECS

#tcw #sw tcw #clone wars #clones

2K notes · View notes

yuckitup-jwd · 4 years

Text

Fulldeckisms Part 1

A couple of blocks behind the parade.

A mind like wet tennis shoes... Makes squishy noises when running.

A notch off the timing mark.

A one-bit brain with a parity error.

A prime candidate for natural deselection.

A square with only three sides.

A victim of retroactive birth control.

A statue in a world of pigeons.

About half smart.

Adult child of alien invaders.

Afraid she'll void her warranty if she thinks too much.

Aliens zapped him with a stupidity ray -- twice.

All the sex appeal of a wet paper bag.

Already visualizing the duct tape over his mouth.

An experiment in Artificial Stupidity.

Answers the door when the phone rings.

Argues with herself -- and loses!

As handy as a whiskbroom and twice as intelligent. -- Peter DeVries

As happy as if he had brains / was in his right mind.

Barney's his hero.

Born a day late and like that ever since.

Both oars in the water, but on the same side of the boat.

Brain permanently in power saving / 8-bit mode.

Brain transplant donor.

Cackles a lot, but I ain't seen no eggs yet.

Calling her stupid would be an insult to stupid people.

"Body by Fisher -- brains by Mattel."

$HOME = /dev/null.

3K RAM free, no EMS.

A .22 caliber intellect in a .357 Magnum world.

A 1.0 in a 4.5 installation.

A 10K brain attached to a 9600 baud mouth.

A 20th century man... The guy has no future.

A 3.5-inch drive, but data on punch cards.

A barnacle on the ship of progress.

A black-and-white mind working on a color-coded problem.

A brain like a BB in a boxcar / box of Corn Flakes.

A butter knife in a steak / prime rib world.

A candidate for optorectomy. (Disconnection of optic nerve fromrectum, to repair a crappy outlook on life.)

A day late and a dollar short.

A deadbolt with a broken cylinder.

A dim bulb in the marquee of life.

A face designed in a wind tunnel.

A flash of light, a cloud of dust, and... What was the question?

A great deal of pride, but very little to be proud of.

A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.

A hemorrhoid on the face of the world.

A hop, skip, and jump from success, but to get there he'd have togive up chewing gum.

A kangaroo loose in her top paddock.

A lap behind the field.

A legend in his own mind.

A logically defunct twit.

A looney tune.

A lot of feathers but not much chicken. -- Kim Mitchell

A medical mystery.

A mental midget with the IQ of a fencepost. -- Tom Waits

A mind as empty as the sleeping pill concession at a honeymoon hotel.

A modest little person, with much to be modest about. -- Churchill

A natural talent for finding subliminal messages in ice cubes.

A Neanderthal brain in a Cro-Magnon body.

A pacifist out of necessity / always loses in a battle of wits.

A PBS mind in an MTV world.

A penalty kick over the bar. (in soccer)

A peripheral visionary.

A poor excuse for protoplasm.

A quart low.

A real rocket scientologist.

A real space cadet.

A return with no gosub.

A room temperature IQ -- centigrade.

A semitone flat on the high notes.

A single-cylinder brain in a V8 world.

A socketless drone in a plug-and-play world.

A standard deviant.

A teapot with a cracked lid.

A titanic intellect... In a world full of icebergs.

A vacuum-tube brain in a microchip world.

A VGA card and a Herc monitor.

A violin minus the bow.

A walking argument for birth control / post-natal abortion.

A waste of skin.

A wind-up clock without a key.

Airhead / bubble-brain.

Alive today only because it's illegal to kill him.

All booster, no payload.

All cassette, no tape.

All crown, no filling.

All fetch and no execute.

All foam, no beer.

All foliage, no fruit.

All hammer, no nail.

All hat and no cattle.

All hawk and no spit. -- Molly Ivins talking about Ross Perot

All he remembers about his middle name is the first letter.

All his eggs in the same basket.

All his learning curves look like Mount Everest.

All icing, no cake.

All lime and salt, no tequila.

All missile, no warhead.

All of his bytes are odd.

All Preparation, no H.

All shot, no powder.

All signs and no scenery. -- John Taylor

All the lights don't shine in her marquee.

All the notes, none of the music.

All the personality of linoleum flooring / plasticene / putty /caulking / saran wrap / a bowl of oatmeal / a plastic spoon.

All thrust/mach, no vector.

All wax and no wick.

Alphabetizes junk mail / T-shirts / canonical lists.

Always in the right place, but at the wrong time.

Always late... Her ancestors arrived on the June Flower.

Always needs to have jokes explained.

Always responds to "Make Money Fast" postings on the Net.

Always sharpening his sleeping skills.

Always speaks her mind, so usually she's speechless.

An 8080 in a 68000 environment.

An alligator. (All mouth, no ears.)

An Apple //e on UUCP.

An early example of the Peter Principle.

An ego like a black hole.

An example of how the dinosaurs survived for millions of yearswith walnut-sized brains.

An expert on the historical significance of cottage cheese.

An inch short and a stroke early.

An innundated receptacle of primordial ooze.

An intellect rivaled only by garden tools.

An XT clone in a Pentium zone.

Ano-fossal ambiguity. (Can't tell his ass from a hole in the ground.)

Another engineering prototype that should not have been shipped.

Any connection between his reality and ours is purely coincidental.

Any similarity between him and a human being is purely coincidental.

Any slower and he'd be in reverse. -- Gignac

Any smarter and he'd be retarded.

Argues with herself -- and loses!

As bent as a corkscrew.

As bright as a nightlight / small appliance bulb / tulip bulb.

As dumb as an ox.

As focused as a fart.

As happy as the village idiot.

As popular as a French kiss at a family reunion.

as popular as a pork pie at a Jewish wedding.

As quick as a corpse.

As rare as a nine bob note. (Very English.)

As sharp as a bag of wet mice. -- Foghorn Leghorn

As sharp as a marble / bowling ball / beachball / pin head /wet sponge / bowl of Jello / mashed potato sandwich,and twice as smart.

As smart as a politician/lawyer is honest.

As smart as bait / an automatic email responder script.

As smart as Christie Brinkley is ugly.

As strong as an ox and as dumb as two.

As thick as champ. (Irish; champ is mostly mashed spuds and cabbage.)

As thick as two short planks / two half bricks.

As useful as a back pocket in a vest. (Very English.)

As useful as a brick lifevest.

As useful as a cheese sandwich to a drowning ferret.

As useful as a chocolate teapot / fireguard.

As useful as a football bat.

As useful as a fur-lined walking stick.

As useful as a glass hammer.

As useful as a hip pocket on a T-shirt.

As useful as a kickstand on a horse.

As useful as a lead parachute.

As useful as a mint-flavored suppository.

As useful as a spit valve on a guitar.

As useful as a top hat with pockets.

As useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle.

As useful as an inflatable cheeseknife.

As useful as bolognese sauce on shoe laces.

As useful as bookends down a well.

As useful as green stop lights.

As useful as reverse gear on a lawn mower.

At least he has a positive attitude about his destructive habits.

Attic's a little dusty.

Back burners not fully operating.

Bad spot on the disk.

Baler done run out of twine.

Bandwidth limited.

Bats have flown the belfry, and now he's all alone.

Bats in the belfry.

Batteries not included.

Been napping in front of the ion shield again.

Been one too many times through the wormhole.

Been playing with his wand too much.

Been playing with the pharmacy section again.

Been short on oxygen one time too many.

Been using her head as a mass driver.

Better at sex than anyone; now all he needs is a partner.

Blew his O-rings.

Blew the hatch before the lock sealed.

Blocked one too many hockey pucks / soccer balls / puncheswith his head.

Blown/leaking head gasket.

Born during low tide in / swimming in the shallow end ofthe gene pool.

Born too late -- he'd have been a great Neanderthal.

Born ugly and built to last.

Brain as busy as a hog farmer in Israel/Iran/...

Brain is running on empty.

Brain like a hard drive with no read/write head.

Bright as a Zippo lighter without a flint.

Bright as Alaska in December.

Bright as an acetylene torch -- without an oxygen supply.

Brings a knife to a gunfight. -- Sean Connery, The Untouchables

Brings binoculars to submarine races.

Broadcasts static.

Bubbles/leaks in her think tank.

Buddy breathing with himself. (SCUBA term.)

Built a special showcase for his herd of pet rocks.

Busier than a one-armed paper hanger.

Busier than a one-legged cat trying to cover its excretaon a frozen pond.

Busy as a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest.

Caboose seems to be pulling the engine.

Calling him a pea brain would be an undeserved compliment.

Calls people to ask them their phone number.

Can be outwitted by a jar of Marshmallow Fluff.

Can discern facts and form predictions with the acumen of an economist.

Can easily be confused with facts.

Can only remember her old passwords.

Can only shoot pool with a left-handed cue stick.

Can't count his balls and get the same answer twice.

Can't dial 911 because she can't find "11" on the phone.

Can't find his ass with two hands and a periscope/compass/map/flashlight/bloodhound/GPS receiver (in a locked closet).

Can't find his couch in the living room.

Can't find log base two of 65536 without a calculator.

Can't hold water in a bucket. (Can't keep a secret.)

Can't program his way out of a for-loop.

Car's only got three wheels, and one's going flat.

Carrier wave unmodulated.

Carries a tire gauge in her purse.

Cart can't hold all the groceries.

Cauliflower for brains.

Cerebrum vaccuoso. (Empty head.)

Changes hands and picks up a stroke.

Charming as a carbuncle.

Cheats when filling out opinion polls.

Cheezwiz for brains.

Chimney's clogged.

Clock doesn't have all its numbers.

Closer to the edge than a bicycle on the autobahn.

Cold / flat / dry as a witch's tit.

Colder than a well-digger's ass in the Klondike.

Collects cards for Craig.

Communications with him is limited to ping.

Confused as a baby in a topless bar.

Confused as a lesbian in a fishmongers.

Conserves toilet paper by using both sides.

Consumes hard drugs as vitamins.

Contributes to collections like this one without searching firstto see if their little gem is already listed.

Contributes to the population problem.

Could only be loved/missed if the minister read someone else's eulogy.

Could qualify as a houseplant if he learned to photosynthesize.

Couldn't balance a checkbook if Einstein helped.

Couldn't be shown that his ass was on fire with a flashlight anda three-way mirror.

Couldn't count to 21 if he were barefoot and without pants.

Couldn't engineer his way out of a wet paper bag.

Couldn't figure it out if God gave him the instruction manual.

Couldn't find his way through a maze even if the rats helped him.

Couldn't find oil with a dipstick.

Couldn't find two Saint Bernards if they were in the sametelephone booth with him.

Couldn't get a clue during clue mating season in a field full ofhorny clues if he smeared his body with clue musk anddid the clue mating dance.

Couldn't get laid if he crawled up a chicken's rear end andwaited his turn.

Couldn't get laid in a monkey whorehouse with a sack ofbananas. -- David Spade

Couldn't hit sand if he fell off a camel.

Couldn't hit the broad side of a barn if he were standing inside.

Couldn't hit water if he fell out of a boat.

Couldn't organize a piss-up in a brewery. (Common in Australia.)

Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.

Couldn't run out of sight on a dark night / in a week.

Couldn't scratch his ass with a hand full of fish hooks.

Couldn't tell which way the elevator was going if he had two guesses.

Couldn't think/pee/fight his way out of a paper bag.

Couldn't write dialog for a porno flick.

CPU doesn't pick up on all clock cycles.

CPU is always in powersave mode.

CPU not connected to the bus.

Cranial cavity filled with neutronic matter. (Really dense.)

Cranio-rectally inverted.

Creates his swap file in a RAM disk.

Cunning as a dodo bird.

Cursor's flashing but there's no response.

Dealing with him is less fun than going to the dentist.

Dealing with him is one angst worse than a blind date.

Deep as her dimples / reflection in a mirror.

Defective hard drive / boot sector.

Dense as a London fog.

Depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

Diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

Diarrhea of the mouth; constipation of the ideas.

Differently clued. -- Dave Clark

Dock doesn't quite reach the water.

Does aerobics... in his head.

Does everything the hard way, like making love standing upin a hammock.

Does the work of three men: Larry, Curly, and Moe. (Three Stooges)

Doesn't adjust for leap years.

Doesn't consider his drive a slice unless it lands two fairways over.

Doesn't have a fart's prayer in a hurricane.

Doesn't have a round in every chamber.

Doesn't have all his cornflakes in one box.

Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash / cups in the cupboard /groceries in the same bag.

Doesn't have all the dots on his dice / pens in her plotter.

Doesn't have both oars in the water -- can't even find the damn boat.

Doesn't have elastic in both of his socks.

Doesn't have his belt through all the loops.

Doesn't have sixteen annas to the rupee.

Doesn't have the brain power to toast a crouton.

Doesn't have the sense God gave an animal cracker.

Doesn't have two neurons to rub together.

Doesn't just know nothing; doesn't even suspect much.

Doesn't just wear perfume, she marinates in it.

Doesn't know much, but leads the league in nostril hair. -- Billing

Doesn't know whether to scratch his watch or wind his balls.

Doesn't know which side the toast is buttered on.

Doesn't need to worry about excess knowledge.

Doesn't put the cross-hairs on the target.

Doesn't quite sample at the Nyquist rate.

Doesn't suffer from ear pressure when flying at altitude.

Doesn't suffer from stress, she's a carrier.

Don't blame him, he's from Uranus.

Don't know what his problem is, but it's hard to pronounce.

Donated her body to science fiction.

Donated her body to scientists... Before she was done using it.

Downhill skiing in Iowa.

Driveway doesn't quite reach the garage.

Driving at night with the lights off.

Driving down the road of life with his sun shield in place.

Driving with his tailgate down (and stuff is falling out).

Driving with two wheels in the sand / not all wheels on the pavement.

Dropped his second stage too soon.

Dropped on his head as a child.

Dumb as asphalt / dirt / a mud fence / a stump / a sack of hammers.

Dumber than a chicken / box of hair/rocks / sled tracks.

During evolution his ancestors were in the control group.

Ears are redirected to /dev/null.

Easier to count the bricks left than the bricks missing.

Echoes between the ears.

Eight pawns short of a gambit.

Either the good twin or the evil one, hard to say.

Electroencephalographically challenged.

Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor / penthouse /mezzanine.

Elevator goes all the way to the top but the door doesn't open.

Elevator is on the ground floor and he's pushing the Down button.

Elevator to the brain suite is out of order.

Emails a one-line contribution to this list with a full copy ofthe list attached.

End of season sale at the cerebral department. -- Gareth Blackstock

Enjoys listening to telemarketers.

Enough sawdust between the ears to bed an elephant.

Even a two button mouse gives him too many options.

Even in victory, he's a loser.

Evidence for the theory of a missing link.

Evolved from a toxic waste dump.

Failed the Turing test.

Fell out of the family tree.

Fifty-one cards short of a full deck.

Fighting the war with a starter pistol / water pistol /pop gun / cap gun.

Finds a flat by swapping tires.

Finds canonical humor collections amusing.

Finds Sesame Street / knock-knock jokes challenging.

Fired from McDonald's for having a short attention span.

Fired her retro-rockets a little late.

Flaky.

Flying on a cold shot. (Inadequate force from a steam catapultlaunch on an aircraft carrier.)

Flying/landing on one engine.

Focused like a 12 gauge shotgun.

Fog rolled in the day he was born, and a bit of it never rolled out.

Folds ace plus red jack hand when playing blackjack.

For those who never forget a face, his is an exception.

Foreign substances float in his cranial fluids.

Forgot to pay his brain bill.

Found his marbles, but is playing jacks with them.

Four bits short of a full DEC.

Four bows short of a string quartet.

Four cents short of a nickel.

Fruit looking for a cake to happen.

Full of wisdumb.

Full throttle, dry tank.

Fur coat and no knickers. (Scottish expression.)

Gasoline engine, diesel fuel.

Gates/barriers are down, the lights are flashing, but thetrain isn't coming.

Gavel doesn't quite hit the bench.

Gears grind/don't always mesh.

Gets a charge out of pissing on electric fences.

Gets her mail at an unknown zip code.

Gets his orders from another planet.

Gets hypnotized on the de-spun section.

Gets lost in thought -- it's unfamiliar territory.

Gets parity errors under load.

Gives a lot of bull for somebody what ain't got no cattle.

Goalie for the dart team.

God might still use him for miracle practice.

God's favorite target for lightning strikes.

Goes with the flow... He's a bed wetter.

Good at quantum tunneling but not much else.

Got a life, but wasn't sure what to do with it.

Got help, but it didn't help. -- Bob Thaves

Got his brains as a stocking stuffer.

Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.

Got up on the wrong side of bed again this morning -- like always.

Guillotining him would make only an aesthetic difference.

Gyros are loose.

Habits explainable if he was raised by wolves.

Had a head crash / her server's crashed.

Had his brain been constructed of silk, he would have beenhard-pressed to find the material to make a canarya set of cami-knickers. -- P.G. Wodehouse

Half a bubble off plumb. -- attributed to Mark Twain

Happiness is seeing her picture on a milk carton.

Hard to distinguish from the tail end of a horse.

Hard to tell if he has an ace up his sleeve or if the ace ismissing from his deck altogether.

Has 100-meter talent, but is half a mile into the marathon of life.

Has a bird's-eye view, and a brain to match.

Has a bus fault problem.

Has a divide-by-zero look on his face.

Has a face only a mother could love -- but she hates it too.

Has a few wait states.

Has a full six-pack but lacks the plastic thing to hold them together.

Has a leak in his ceiling.

Has a mind like a mousetrap, but should let some of those poor mice go.

Has a one-way ticket on the Disoriented Express.

Has a personality all her own... No one else wanted it. -- Jim Davis

Has a pulse, but that's about all.

Has a random memory fault.

Has a slow clock.

Has a sparse matrix. (Beware, "matrix" comes from the Latin "womb".)

Has a two-bit operating system.

Has achieved inner peace, but still displays outer obnoxiousness.

Has all her bricks, but no cement holding them together.

Has all the brains God gave a duck's ass.

Has an hourglass figure, but most of the sand is on thep.m. side. -- Thaves

Has an inferiority complex, but not a very good one.

Has an IQ one lower than it takes to grunt.

Has been seen tossing bread crumbs to helicopters.

Has change for a seven dollar bill.

Has delusions of adequacy.

Has FINO (first in never out) memory.

Has her headquarters where her hindquarters should be.

Has his brain on cruise control again.

Has his solar panels aimed at the moon.

Has it floored in neutral.

Has lots of books, but all he does is lick the ink off the pages.

Has no discretionary intellect.

Has no upper stage.

Has nothing to say, but delights in saying it.

Has only one chopstick in the chowmein.

Has over 1000 funny insults saved in a file, but can'tremember any of them.

Has plenty of talent and vision, just doesn't give a damn.

Has resonance where others have brains.

Has signs on both ears saying "Space for Rent".

Has so few thoughts that when he free associates, it's likewatching tennis.

Has the attention span of an overripe grapefruit.

Has the brains of a house plant / turnip (cooked).

Has the Grand Canyon under the crew cut.

Has the IQ of a salad bar / an ice cube / three below houseplant.

Has the keen awareness of an ostrich in hiding.

Has the mental agility of a soap dish. -- National Lampoon

Has the personality of a snail on Valium.

Has the same talent as Dr. Doolittle.

Has two brains; one is lost and the other is out looking for it.

Hasn't caught on that X and Y are relative values.

Hasn't got all his china in the cupboard.

Hasn't got the brains God gave a cat.

Hasn't got the brains of a retarded anvil/oyster.

Hasn't lost his mind -- it's backed up on tape somewhere.

Having a party in his head, but no one else is invited / dancing.

He came, he saw, he clutched.

HE CAN ONLY TYPE IN UPPER CASE.

He can push but he can't pop.

He demonstrates that beauty times brains is a constant.

He donated his brain to science but they made an early withdrawal.

He fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.

He has a bad brains-to-balls ratio.

He has a good point... Six inches above his eyes.

He has the wisdom of youth, and the energy of old age.

He has two left feet.

He hasn't a single redeeming vice. -- Oscar Wilde

He is a man of few words and he does not know what eitherof them mean. -- Prachett

He is a mouth-breather.

He knows computers... He's not fit for contact with humans.

He went off to cry to mommie/auntie.

#fulldeckisms #nerdjokes #personalityjokes

1 note · View note

radioactivepeasant · 7 years

Text

Dispatches from the Days In-Between

An “Imperial Problem Child” story

The broadcasts, surprisingly, had been Madine’s idea in the end.

The council had been small, only for those with high enough clearance, and normally Skywalker wouldn’t have been included, but recent galactic events had been...odd, to say the least. The question of the hour was how to proceed with Operation Yellow Moon when the Rebellion was under increased scrutiny. (The reporters that showed up on inhabited worlds to mob Skywalker didn’t help either. It was still manageable at this point, as not everyone in the whole galaxy knew what the poor kid looked like, but Madine had his suspicions that one day it might get to the point where the boy started contemplating wearing a mask like his infamous sire.)

And there was another issue. Having Luke along on operations where Vader was likely to be present put the entire mission in jeopardy. Not because they were afraid Luke would betray them. He’d already managed to “steal” several Imperials for the Alliance, to Vader’s great annoyance, and no one in High Command doubted his commitment anymore. (though Madine couldn’t speak for the average Rebel-on-the-street, of course). The problem was that Vader would simply “sense” his son somehow and know right where they were. Hence the discussion of what to do with Luke during the operation.

“All eyes tend to be on our young prince here,” Madine had mused, waving in a mock reverential way to Luke, who responded with a good-natured grimace, “So why not exploit that? Send the Commander in the complete opposite direction and have him make a few large distractions while we’re in the early stages.”

“Won’t that seem rather obvious as a diversion?” someone asked.

Leia nodded eagerly, already tracking with Madine. “Precisely. What better way to make the Empire think we’re up to something important than to draw their attention to the fact that we’re staging a diversion? Besides, with Vader busy trying to retrieve Luke-”

“-Who intends to do some very stupid things to get his attention, if you’ll allow him to,” Luke piped up with a glint in his eye.

Leia shot him a look, then continued, “-with Vader busy, he won’t be tracking us. Therefore he won’t be able to sense the deception on our part, and we’ll be dealing with more predictable enemies.” She sat back, a satisfied look on her face.

“Commander Skywalker,” Mon Mothma said uneasily, “Exactly what did you have in mind?”

This was where Madine had remembered that during the Clone Wars there had been a Jedi -- he couldn’t remember her name now, only that she was a Mon Cala who was rather more pacifistic than most of her comrades -- who used to make small educational broadcasts directed at the children of the Republic. Little, humorous things like “well Separatists decided my medical frigate looked like a very nice target, and now we’re on fire. But that reminds me, do you know how fire extinguishers were invented? No? Because I’m about to tell you!”

“You’re pretty good with mechanics and improvising things on the fly, Commander,” Madine pointed out after bringing up the memory, “I daresay something like that will get attention if you’re off who-knows-where actively engaging the public.”

“That is not without its merits,” Mothma mused. “Especially considering that, if Vader’s alliance of convenience comes to its expected end, you may have more political power than you thought. This may be the best opportunity to sway the public to a different way of thinking. Engage in relief efforts, volunteer, help with education. Things of that nature.”

“Everything I had to do growing up,” Leia teased with a bittersweet smile.

And that had been the beginning of it.

The dispatches started small, “To introduce the characters,” Hobbie had insisted. The first had come from the Executor itself, and was meant for Alliance eyes, mostly, though if it “leaked out”, oh well.

It was simply Wedge Antilles bracing a door with his back, listening to muffled yelling coming from behind it. “Janson and Klivian and a couple Imp pilots have been at each other’s throats for a week now,” he said, “The rest of us were at serious risk of getting caught in the crossfire of a prank war. And since Fel tells me that Hunter and Janni are as bad about escalation as Janson, sooner or later someone is going to report it to Veers or Rieekan and literally no one wants that.” He grinned and gestured to the door. “So we locked them in the laundry room until they resolve their issues. We’re gonna be here awhile.”

Four days later, the first “real” broadcast came from a Mid-Rim world in the midst of a devastating series of storms. Most of it was a call for awareness and aid from those available to help, then it switched over to three men standing knee deep in mud, about to haul someone’s generator up and onto a waiting anti-grav sled. Zev Senesca looked tired, and Lando Calrissian looked comically miserable. Luke looked like he was running on caffeine and bad ideas. “Hey everybody,” Luke waved, grinning. “I’m Luke Skywalker, and today we’re going to show you how simple machines work. Because the mud got into our equipment and this is the only way we’re getting this generator out. So, y’know, keep this stuff in mind in case you’re ever, I dunno, stranded in a swamp or something.” “Not that that’s ever happened to you,” Lando snorted, rolling up his sleeves. Luke ignored this and held up a cable, part of a pulley system, and a roll of space-tape. “Okay! Ready?” “As always,” Lando cut in with a charming smile for the holorecorder, “Do not attempt any of this without adult supervision. Responsible adult supervision.”

The third broadcast happened close to three weeks later, coming from coordinates near the Outer Rim, not far from the Honoghr system. This time it was footage from a handheld holorecorder of two rebels (Luke and Wes) and two Imperials (Hunter and Lt. Sunber). “Hey everybody, I’m Luke,” “I’m Janson,” “I’m Hunter,” “And I’m tired!” Tank finished with a sigh. “And we....are totally lost.” Luke shrugged and looked completely unrepentant. “Turns out, something about whatever planet we’re orbiting right now is messing up all our instruments, so we’re going to have to land this thing the old-fashioned way. And since I was never taught how to fix a Lambda shuttle that’s gone into a factory reset-” “Remember, stay in school, kids!” Hunter interrupted jokingly. “-We’re going to hack this thing,” Luke finished. “Which miiiight mean some warranties are getting voided today.” He grinned up at the holorecorder. “As always, don’t try this without adult supervision. And if any other Imperials pick this up....don’t tell my father.”

Of course, he was banking on them doing exactly that. And if some of his “leaked dispatches” ended up on shows like “Last Word from Coruscant” and “Weekly Quibbler”, well, that was more attention on some of the social issues in the Empire. Which, of course, had been Mon Mothma’s hope in the first place. And a very reliable source -- who had to pretend he was not amused in the slightest by his son’s antics -- had insinuated that the broadcasts were becoming quite a headache for the reigning tyrant, and that just made everything better.

#imperial problem child #star wars au #Luke Skywalker #Rogue Squadron #Darth Vader #Princess Leia #janek sunber #Skywalker Shenanigans #a series of unfortunate skywalkers

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