Wally Darling had an apple salad tonight which is mostly just apples since I forgot to get the rest of the stuff for the salad 🥗 😅
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Dethvanity is really funny to me conceptually as an episode because you can see how little they had to make the characters insecure about for the bit. They swing for obvious lowblow choices with Pickle' baldness and Nathan's weight and even those require some suspension of disbelief because ok. Sure. Nathan '(said extremely proudly) never skipped a meal in my life!' Explosion is insecure about being a big man now. Nathan *guy who everyone thinks is smoking hot 99% of the time* Explosion is a tiny bit larger than usual and is insecure about it now. Lol. Lmao even.
But anyway then we hit Skwisgaar and Toki and there's like NOTHING to swing for, you can see them going uhhh ok Skwis doesn't sleep he probably drinks a lot of coffee, and Toki? Shit, what does Toki have to be insecure about with his looks. He's perfect, he's adorable, he's ripped. Um. FUCK IT, HE'S DOING NOTHING BUT EATING LEMONS. WE GOT NOTHING, WE GOT NOTHING, JUST GIVE THE BOY CITRUS FRUITS.
WOE 🍋 BE UPON YE
I'm sure i could make some smarter points about the attempts at applying vanity in this ep and how outside of this and a few other moments i do actually like that the show rarely takes pot shots at things like Nathan's weight, but you see Nathan has shirtless scenes in this one and so my intelligence is impeded when all the blood rushes out of my head and into my-
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dungeon meshi does smtn really special for me as an autistic person, not just bc of laios's obvious autistic coding but bc of marcille's picky eating. now, ive only seen 6 episodes of the anime (havent read the manga yet so no spoilers) but i do really love how nobody like...bullies marcille for being a picky eater when it comes to dungeon food. there's an occasional joke or two but ultimately her party encourages her to try new things and will eat things before she does to show her it's safe.
being autistic means i have sensory issues that completely prevent me from eating certain foods, and due to abuse from adults in my life trying to force me to eat these foods-- even occasionally sneaking them into my meals without telling me and making judgemental comments about my body and eating habits-- trying new foods can be genuinely terrifying for me. so idk there's just something really special to me abt marcille's pickiness being met with encouragement instead of bullying. especially bc it results in her actually trying new things. it makes me wanna break out of my comfort zone a lil too and that makes me really happy
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had enough of eating unhealthy takeout food so im gonna try roasting some vegetables w/ seasonings for dinner tonight everybody wish me luck
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Tried making toast. Threw up toast. Managed a bath but it set off my arrhythmia and I threw up again. Finished Constantinople chapter and now catching up on Age of Napoleon podcast. Sometimes you get got by gastroparesis and try again tomorrow
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Possibly my favorite food in the world is scones with clotted cream and strawberry jam. It's just the most perfect, delicious food ever. I've only had it a few times, always at fancy tea shops in the city. It is basically impossibly to find clotted cream in stores in America, importing it is incredibly expensive, and making it yourself is a 12+ hour process that has always intimidated me.
But today I went to the fancy grocery store in town. A while back they expanded, and now sell many more products than they used to. And I found clotted cream there!!!!! I was shocked, I figured finding it in an American store would never happen, especially in a small town like mine. I'm so incredibly excited. Sometime very soon I'm going to make some scones and then have them with cream and jam!!!
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hi it feels like it's been a while since i've given a life update since i've been going the Fuck through it but the editing for my book is going swimmingly (not foreseeing it coming out until at least next year though, since i've had to retcon and rewrite a lot) and there's a possibility that i'll be going on meds soon which should. Hopefully help. don't ask how i've functioned without them until this point (spite) AND i'm going to start looking into some freelance work so, let's pray that things finally start turning around for me because with every day that passes i feel myself further descend into madness and i need something to change asap.
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if you're someone who goes out to eat occasionally, try to make it a habit to remember to pray for the staff, by name if you can for the ones you know and for all the others you don't. a lot of the time service workers are kids, and even when they're not, they're doing a hard and often thankless job, so much that almost nobody thinks of them unless they screw something up. but they deserve to be treated like human beings and respected for their work. (and given a radical overhaul of the system that lessens the pressure on them and demands their protection, but that's another rant shhhh.)
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