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heyimdove · 8 months

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TW: climate change, wildfires, hurricanes, woe.

Sorry, I know you follow me for Good Omens stuff, but I’m freaking out.

San Diego doesn’t get hurricanes, but one, (a category 4???) is coming for us.

I’m a born and raised San Diegan and I can’t believe I’m typing this at all. But here we are, facing Hurricane Hilary and collectively holding our breath, wondering if we’ll be okay. Wondering what we’ll look like in a few hours.

I’m a worrier. I worry. I worry for our loud wonderful parrots who wake me up every day, and for our marine wildlife who I love with all my heart. I fear for our homeless community, who have already dealt with enough this year just existing, and who are too often children. I worry for the people who believe they’ll be okay, will make a bad decision or two, and prove themselves wrong.

It all makes me think of 2003.

For a week that October, it felt like the world was ending. The Cedar Fire, which was the biggest fire in California history (might still be) burned for a week. I was little.

We had never had snow days (the only snow we get out here comes in cone form), but suddenly white ash was falling like snow and school was canceled. This was the first revelation to me that we were really In It.

I remember sitting at the sliding glass door with my big sister, small feet pressed against the glass, as we watched the sky turn black from smoke and ash. I remember how you could only tell it was daytime because you could still see the sun behind the smoke. It was this ominous, dull red orb, like a dying ember, like Sauron’s eye, like God had abandoned us but stuck around to watch til the credits rolled. Even inside, we held wet washcloths over our noses and mouths so we wouldn’t inhale the ash that snuck into the house through cracks we didn’t know we had.

I remember my dad, crying and clutching the phone, as he begged my grandma to follow evacuation orders to leave their house. Grandpa didn’t want to go, so he stood on the roof with a garden hose, watching a wall of fire two blocks away as it ate trees and homes. He stood up there, spraying the roof like it would make any difference, while Grandma broke down and screamed for him to escape while they still could. Dad kept saying “leave him, Mom, leave him!”

I’ll be honest: that fucked me up.

Scripps Ranch, their part of town, has eucalyptus trees. They’re oily. They blow up when they catch fire. He only agreed to leave when he watched one explode a few houses away. My loyal, loving grandma didn’t leave him behind.

That taught me something strange about love that I haven’t been able to untangle since. I love my grandfather, but I never have forgiven him for what he put her through that day. What he prioritized under the black skies and white ash and red sun when people were dying. I wonder if he thinks he won, that he beat the fire, because their house didn’t burn in the end. I wonder if he thinks of himself as David and the fire Goliath, not realizing that his David was so small, Goliath hadn’t ever known he existed.

I hope so much that we don’t get more Davids this time around.

That people don’t hear about 19ft waves and grab their boards. Don’t drive their cars through the same place it always floods in Mission Valley, the same place people always end up drowning. Don’t try to save a house and lose a life instead.

That fire season was our worst, but fire response has improved so much since. Everyone said it was so bad because we hadn’t been prepared; now we do backburns, controlled burns, we’re better about campfire education. We’re safer now. We listen to evacuation orders. We have bug out bags and back up plans and binders where we keep our important documents. Aside from the occasional low-grade panic when I smell fire in the air that may be a barbecue, may not, I’m not really even afraid of wildfires now, only sad for the places impacted by them, like Hawaii and Canada. I find myself wondering what their sun looks like.

When I think back, I also remember how everyone came together to help. Firefighters from across the country and around the world came to help fight. Came to help us. It chokes me up as I write- especially when I think about the active fire maps and remember we only have so many firefighters.

I hope we don’t need backup this time. But I’m scared anyway.

Because we don’t have hurricane practice. This is new. The rain this year was new. The October-June winter was new. I’m scared this is is like 2003 and we’ve got a massive deadly natural event and no idea how to fight it. We didn’t build for this.

I hope this is just a dramatic response to what winds up being nothing. I was in Ireland during Hurricane Ophelia, and that was a bit of wild weather, but most people shrugged it off. I’m crossing fingers and everything else I can for an Ophelia situation.

To any San Diegans reading: don’t shoot the Hurricane.

But if it’s worse, then I just want to say I love my city. I love the way we held each other up in 2003 and 2007 and 2020-22. I hope we never have to again, but I’m grateful I have all of you if we do.

I just sandbagged around the house, covered the windows with blankets, filled the freezer with ice. Everything’s charging, my flashlights have batteries, and my bathtub is clean and full of water. I’m not religious, but I still said a little prayer for the fish in my pond and brought in the patio umbrella. I couldn’t catch the black cat that hangs out in my yard so I said a little prayer for her, too.

I hope I reblog this on Monday to tell you I’m a silly and melodramatic idiot, but today I’m scared. Climate change is real and something must be done. I’m sick of fires and floods and this self-fulfilling prophecy that the end is nigh.

We still have options. We have addresses (figuratively speaking). We know how to build the guillotines (figuratively speaking). We outnumber those who would have our streets flood and our homes burn for personal profit- and we can permanently separate them from it (figuratively speaking). And I am tired of speaking in codes about who our enemies are now that the planet is fighting back. I’m sick of having to say I’m figuratively speaking.

#hurricane hilary #personal blog #wildfire #cedar fire #san diego #climate change

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m7nson · 2 years

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Hottie hot hot ❥ Joseph Quinn

˙❥˙ your new creative writing professor is sure a hottie

TW - food, cooking, and eating

✎masterlist

An- gender neutral but I made the reader shocked that he's British I apologize-

Not edited

"Hi is this y/n?" You gave a confused face, "yes this is she?" "Hi I'm calling to inform you that you need to retake your creative writing elective again." Your eyes widen. "May I ask why?"

"Everyone who had professor' Carlton has to retake their course, and I'm sure you've heard the scandal about him having sexual intercourse with his students."

You didn't actually think it was true. You would believe it if he was hot; but he was fifty five year old man. He looked like the principal from 'Billy Madison'.

"And because of that, we don't know who had activities with him to pass and who didn't." You signed "well I'm not to happy about this but thank you for calling."

"You can either, retake it and get the credit. Or you can take another course..." You did enjoy this class, and it was quite easy for you. "Yes I'll retake it then," "alrighty, the classes will be just like last year but new professor." You nodded "thank you so much."

"I hope you have a great day, and I apologize for this inconvenience." You nodded "you too, thank you again." You hung up the phone frustrated. Shit, now I have to go through that all over again; you groaned.

✎

"Did you hear about your new creative writing teacher?" Your roommate, Olive said sitting on the other side of your bed closing you laptop. "Other than that It's not professor' Carlton; no."

"Well.." they started as they laying down on their elbow "I heard he's a hottie hot hot." You chuckled "he's that hot eh?" You asked raising your eyebrows.

"I personally haven't seen him.. but I've heard some things." They said smirking, you rolled your eyes. "What have you 'heard'?" She sighed getting up. "Well, first off he's British.." your eyes widen slightly "really?"

They laughed "see! Your so lucky you have a hot creative writing teacher, while I'm stuck with grandma; Mrs. Card." You laughed "just because he's British doesn't automatically make him attractive."

"That's true, but people have been saying he's hot, so I don't think he's a creepy uncle like profess' Carlton." You sighed "of course they hired a hot professor after what happened with that old creep.."

They gave a gross face, "I'll admit that is kinda weird." You nodded, as your attention turned back to your closed laptop. "Don't you have class tomorrow?" You shook your head.

"In two days, don't worry as soon as I see I'm I'll tell you how much of a hottie hot hot he is." You said putting your hands on her shoulder. "Your lucky I wasn't doing anything important."

You said putting your laptop in your nightstand while getting up. "That's why I closed it!" They said walking out as you followed them. "Your cooking tonight right?" They said throwing themselves on the couch.

"Yeah I'll cook, but your cleaning."

✎

Never thought I would have to come back into this room, never thought I would be going down this cracked sidewalk again. Yet here I am, walking into professor' Carlton room; or well, whoever the new 'hottie' is.

You looked at your phone '2:49' sighing deciding on silencing it, of course your ten minutes early. Decided to see if the door was open, you doubted it but good try. Knocking... No answer. Trying the knob, and I was right, it's locked. This isn't your first time being early either remembering last year how you were half an hour early and sat on this dirty concrete.

Things just don't change. You sat down on the step placing your bookbag on your lap. At least it's only ten minutes and not twenty-five. Scrolling on your phone trying to by time, you didn't notice someone walking up onto the steps.

Until you noticed almond slacks in the corner of your eyes. Looking up and, seeing a— woe, holy shit this guy is so fine. Quickly getting up and wiping down your butt, just in case.

"I don't think anyone was gonna be earlier than me.." he started as you didn't realize his accent "Oh, yeah I didn't realize how early I was until I got here.. the door locked so I'm just waiting for the.. new professor..." You started slightly rambling.

"Well glad I got here now instead of later.." he said grabbing his keys from his pockets and unlocking the door. Your eyes widen "Oh! You're the new professor?" Holy shit the rumors were true, he sure was hot.

He smiled opening the door for you, "Professor' Quinn." He said handing out his hand to shake. "Y/n, it's— it's really nice to meet you.. professor' Quinn" oh my his hands are warm and his jawline— Jesus. This is gonna be a long year.

"Met me at Donut Shop at 3:30 IMPORTANT !!!" sent now

✎

You walked into the shop, it's a ghost town. Except for Olive sitting there back facing uou. You took the seat and Olive dropped their phone on the table "what happened!?"

You signed taking a bite out of your donut. "You were right, he is a hottie hot hot." Their eyes widen. "Really?" You nodded "he was actually.. so fine." You said dreamingly.

"Coming from you that's a lot—" you nodded taking another bite "I know!" You shook your head, "I don't know what I'm gonna do." They took a sip of their drink as you did the same.

You heard the bell ring from the door, looking to see who it was. As you spat out your drink, coughing as you two grabbed napkins. "Shit, shit shit— he's here!" You whispered shouted at them.

"Who?" "Hottie hot hot— no don't turn around—" their eyes widen "holy shit you are right—" you looked at him and noticed him coming this way. "He's coming this way— act cool, no smart!"

"Y/n, I feel like you're stalking me eh?" You laughed "I could say the same!" He smiled "I'm actually surprised to see you here! This place is usually always empty." You told him with a slight smile.

"It is usually empty, but their coffee here is fucking amazing." You're eyes widen that he cursed and he seemed to notice that so he smiled "Were not on school property so I think it's ok to swear."

You nodded as you heard the speakers turn on "I'm sorry to break this up but we closed two minutes ago." You three turned to the worker "mate— it's just us three here." They shrugged "I just want to go home." "Alright alright we'll get out of your hair." Olive said getting up, they gave you a look saying 'I'll meet you in the car, you go get him' as they walked out quickly.

"Sorry if I ruined a date or something." He said walking to the door slowly as you got up grabbing you bag, drink, and most importantly your donut. "Oh, god no their my roommate."

He nodded "Are you nervous about the assignment?" He asked trying to keep the conversation going as he opened the door for you. "Oh- thank you! Nope not at all, I already have a concept in mine."

"Wow, I'm impressed." You laughed as he took a sip of his coffee "it's not a difficult, you just asked for a one thousand word essay over anything!" He laughed "I didn't want to make it difficult for the first assignment!"

You laughed taking a bite out of your donut "May I know what the concept is?" He smiled at you, as you chucked "nope, it's a surprise, you professor; get no special treatment." And then it hit you, your talking to your professor like he's a friend...

He laughed "I'll be looking forward to reading it." You smiled nodding "and please call me Joseph or Joe when we're outside of school." You chuckled "ok.. Joseph." You laughed "I'm sure you're a very busy man, so I don't want to be taking any more of your time."

He shook his head "probably just give go home and.. think about what the next assignment is gonna be." You laughed "don't be too hard on us." As he laughed walking too the passenger side "I'll try.. I'll see you in class next week?"

You nodded "Of course, I'll see you professor!" Trying to open the door but Olive started reversing. You gave a smile at Joseph who was watching trying to open it again, as they started reversing again. Making you rush to open the door and succeeded getting in as Olive laughed.

"So how was the professor?" You sighed

"god he's so fine."

✎

#°｡☆ -> [ JOSEPH QUINN 🧸 ]#joseph quinn x reader #joseph quinn #°｡☆ -> [ INEFFABLE 🧸 ]

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light-mega-z · 1 year

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I FINALLY DEFEATED THE TITANS AND THE SHROUDS LET'S GOOOOOOOOOOO

Ah, angst...

...

... No, no I... I don't have the courage to even look at that particular scene... Sorry...

He's coping hard...

Actually... If you peeps don't mind, let me share you a bit of my story.

TW: If you know what's Idia's woes, then yknow what's this about

It's okay if you don't want to read, just skip and go your merry way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I relate to Idia a lot... In the guilt department...

Before pandemic, my grandfather (bless his soul) was admitted to hospital.

The doctors actually said he still have chance to recover, he was fully aware of his surroundings and his condition.

... Then that's where I come in.

It started as just dizzy spell, I don't feel comfortable with my surroundings...

Then suddenly, I feel heavy, my brain felt like someone put a cement in it, and it gets worst and worst that I literally bent over my grandma for support.

A supposed check up turns out to fully need to admit me. I caught myself a dengue, and I only admitted after days from it's first sign, and the negligence on our part make it worst. I think they said I almost go above the critical stage (I think that's bc of our negligence) by the time they admitted me.

On the day I got admitted, at that same time, he's breathing stopped.

Like I said, he was fully aware of what's going on... That means our financial problems too...

I really don't want to believe it... But feel a little part of me whispers to me it's my fault why he... Gave up, so the cost can focused on my recovery...

I am little to little telling myself now that it wasn't my fault, but that little demon always haunts me, especially on the day where he passed away.

I never tell my family about it, bc ai felt they'll gonna scoff or just thinking me being weird.

And this rant... Helps me to breath little now (even I really know ranting on Internet doesn't help) But, yeah...

ALRIGHT ENOUGH ANGST!

If you reach till this end, well, thanks for reading the whole thing of it. Don't worry, I am fine now, really.

Twisted Wonderland is truly an amazing game, and I don't regret ever playing it from the moment I discovered this.

It truly is inspirational in a perspective of unique way.

#twisted wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #twst #disney twst #twst english #twst thoughts #twst spoilers #twst idia #twst ortho #idia shroud #ortho shroud #ignihyde

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floralkittygambler · 3 years

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My First Tag

Tagged by 2 surprisingly lol, thanks @honesthazbinarchives and @siaesnow - I’m honoured to be considered a buddy to you both ^^

“Starting up a Picrew tag game… you, but four years ago versus now! The purpose is to tag at least five to 15 users that you are friends with, and to create a tag chain of our character development!” ~ @goangelic

Picrew to use: https://picrew.me/image_maker/100365

Why is it always a sob story with me? Ok, jesting aside: Me 4 Years Ago: Without going too into depth, I was in hospital, extremely low and close to death. A few years prior, alongside what was already an uneasy life, I watched 2 very beloved people rot in hospital themselves. There was no one for me and I allowed myself to fall into disarray with matted hair and bones poking out my frame. Everything was such a fucking mess and yet these years are both horribly vivid and hazy. Like a thick fog of repression in my mind. Something I’m not yet willing to confront. Me 4 years ago, and 4 years prior to that is/was a delusional nightmare. Though I plan to tell my lil Kiddas/Squicks a funny ‘tale’ from 2012, it’s the year I wish to distance from the most.

Me Now: The same but ginger lol. Nah, I’ve made my improvements. And setbacks. I’m not as frail and mentally I feel more... It’s painful but I cope better. Therapy is still very much inaccessible to me sadly. Trying to grow as a person, but sometimes Im a grumpy tired lol. I learned of my place on the spectrum and have made my own steps to better understand and communicate more with other people. Im developing my hobbies. And I drink (mildly) in honour of a loved one. That year is still tender and I experience flashbacks and nightmares but I manage. I’m currently blamed for being a cat magnet as housing creatures in need lol. I want to show my little ones the world the way he showed me. Im trying to make good of what life I have. Still shy but I manage many things much better, though I’ve learned to accept where my soul truly stands. Im also now and open and accepted witch. Tomorrow will be hard and I have a long way to go. I take on a more active role in nurturing those around me. Though Ive improved greatly, I still feel something unsettling in the air around me. Also, there are seriously lots of cats drawn to and follow me. Seriously one of the neighbour’s cats even comes ‘round to visit me for hugs. Im the local cat lady. I feel like Susan Ashworth. Overall, I CAN confirm improvement as well as self-reflection. I’m not as toxic as I used to be. I can see and work on my own flaws. I’m far from being where I wish but I’m actively working towards that. Visualising and slowly getting there. I’m seeking to learn new skills and just enjoy my time. Plus my siblings seem to speak to me more and even steal my jokes so... I’m doin’ something right and must be funny enough for that lol. I also owned [’owned’] a large spider this year. She’s a wild giant house spider that lived under our window in a plant pot. Now I fear spiders [trying to get better as I love Ts] but I saw she had an eggsac. So I felt for the Mama spider and started to leave her food, even freeing her legs. Her babies have hatched and she’s moved out now but one of her babies has stayed so Im monitoring them until they choose to leave. I think I’ve become more brave with people, in my self in terms of animals, and just with dealing with shit. I get a bad panic attack now and usually it doesnt look obvious because... I just shrug and try to mentally soothe it [not easy but I try]. And I can ramble for ETERNITY on animals because I love them with my soul 🥺 As for gambling, always done that LOL. I’m honestly proud that Ive never formed an addiction [aside from minor meds one as a kid, cravings for sugar/meat now and my absolute lust for orange juice lol]. I found out I am very durable. BONUS - Me In 4 Years Time:

I become some weeby cat bullshit lol jkjk British Shorthair Waifu? British Shorthair WaifMEW - but seriously you can tint your skin faintly blue by consuming enough blue smarties [brit choc] and Im gonna bloody do it. Make me look like those Avatar alien folks. Tagging... Fuck, I dont really know too many here like that- Especially untagged O.o Ermmmm I hope yall dont mind? @noirellearts, @rootbeergoddess, @enchantedchocolatebars [Sorry if I forgot anyone, I’m extremely slow with name recollection]

#me vs now #some meme shit #tag #tw? maybe #the big britty #the big woe #trust me Im fine we all have our experiences #I have grandma back problems #animals are my life #mama bear #will vlog me turning into violet from willy wonka #vlog? Is that even the correct term?#idk

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