#yk what would be so good for this all... exercise..... i at least am able to walk a lot everyday bcs of school but STILL | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

capseycartwright · 1 year

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genuine question, chuck this if it makes you uncomfortable: how are you able to write smut? i know most of your fics aren't too explicit but you have written some stuff like that before. i grew up religious and my relationship w that and w sex is complicated and i will sometimes get to a point where a sex scene would add to a fic i'm writing, or there's something about the sex life of two characters that i have a fun idea for that could be like, a sexy 5k fic, yk? and i just can't. i end up talking in euphemisms and writing around the word dick. i'm not a prude per se but i associate sex with guilt and shame and fear.

hello friend! sorry for taking so long to respond to you - but i wanted to give the time to the thoughtful answer an ask like this needs.

i think, more than anything - it takes time and effort. even when you first sent me this, i was like hm. not sure if i want to answer. because that irrational, guilty part of my brain still gives that first reaction sometimes - it's hard to shake off the guilt you associate with sex, and pleasure, and fun, when you're raised in a religious environment where that is seen as being wrong.

for me, at least, that freedom has come with embracing my own sexuality - in all the ways that works for me, personally, and i know for everyone that looks different, but for me that's been enjoying the pleasure associated with sex, and not allowing myself to see it as something shameful. you're allowed to feel good - whether that's physically having sex, or actually just reading a smut fic. reading is a form of pleasure and reading smut fic is also a form of pleasure, and there's nothing wrong with that. it takes a lot of unlearning to get to that point and for me, embracing my own sexuality and desires to feel pleasure is at the core of that unlearning.

it's uncomfortable. genuinely, it's uncomfortable. the writing of it is uncomfortable and you've sort of just got to work through that discomfort by forcing yourself to write it. you don't have to publish what you write - but do write it. i don't publish explicit smut fic: i do write it, for myself, as an exercise in unlearning the way that my religion - and, frankly, society - taught me to be ashamed of sex and sensuality. it will feel weird, and uncomfortable - and pushing through that allows you to find ways to enjoy writing in a more explicit way (if you want to write in a more explicit way: you're also not obliged to.)

i think, for me also, what helps is who i am writing about - whether that's queer characters, or female characters, i tend to write more about those who society has made sexuality taboo for, and there's something liberating as a queer woman just being able to go, well, fuck you and the ways you've made me feel i'm not deserving of or entitled to pleasure, and writing that. telling those stories, be it for a female character, be it for a queer couple - that, for me, helps me to process my own shame and guilt through characters who would experience shame and guilt of their own and allowing them to embrace sex and pleasure sort of helps me too, as well.

i hope that isn't as inarticulate as it feels to me. i think - it takes time, and it takes effort on your part as the person who feels the guilt and shame. and i think it also takes giving yourself permission - to write smut, to enjoy fiction that is inherently about sex and senusablity and pleasure, and giving yourself permission to enjoy it. sex is fun (for me: aware that is a blanket statement not applicable to everyone) and i'm not going to ruin any more of my life being ashamed of enjoying it.

okay. hope that helps. u got this friend!

#in which i ramble #asks #anon #its a complicated thing and so take your time with it friend #theres no right answer or right approach #this is just. my thoughts #this was scary to post lmao so there is your proof that it’s not a simple process

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183idfk10-24 · 1 year

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Random ass vent that Lowkey is all over the place and I shouldn’t post this publicly but idgf maybe someone will read it and relate or be like “this bitch stupid idk”

Today my family is celebrating thanksgiving. I just weighed myself and turns out Im at my starting weight again. Starting tomorrow I’m going to watch what I’m eating. I don’t necessarily want to go hard core 500 cals just yet, but I want to eat healthy foods and count calories. I also wanna exercise. I just wanna make healthy habits and be healthy. I mean yeah I will probably eat a less amount of calories to keep me healthy but once I reach at least 120 pounds , that’s when I will starting eating a healthy amount of cals cuz I look like a cow. Even my cousins are getting smaller than me. I think that’s my problem. I mean I compare myself to a lot of people but I compare myself a lot to my cousin. Maybe because my mom compares her to me a lot. Or maybe because we where close in age. Or maybe because we use to be friends but then she turned into a fake bitch and now I feel like I need to be better than her to just prove something. Like today I’m at her house and I noticed she wrote “permit test” on her calendar. And that really makes me annoyed and stressed out because I am a year older (16) and I should already have it but I can’t take it yet because I’m still waiting for my birth certificate to come in the mail. It’s stresses me out because what if I fail? I mean I could retake it. I don’t know. I don’t need to be better than anyone. I just want to be skinny. I wanna have good grades. I wanna be able to drive. I want good friends. I wanna be closer to God. I just want inner peace. I know it sounds corny but meh idk . I just wanna go home to my cat and be alone in my room. What’s wrong with me. Am I even normal lmao? Am I just overthinking… overreacting? I know I can be so much better than this what the actual fuck is wrong with me. I’m such a btich. I always complain abt my mom yelling at me but then I treat my brother the same way. Am I gonna treat my kids like this in the future? Tf hopefully no. I need to change. I need to just be nicer and more positive. Not just in a mental form but also physically I need to be healthy. Like I have such good genes! I have a very curvy body and small bones and waist. It’s just covered in 60 each pounds of tucking fat. I have nice hair, a pretty face (I mean some ppl will think it’s normal not like supermodel, western beauty standard type of pretty) I mean I kinda got a non defined nose and uneven eyebrows but it’s alright bc it makes my features look softer and my eye shape is pretty. And my mouth reminds me of a pourcil doll (idk how to spell it lol) but anyways I’m just saying I like how my face looks, I like my hair and body (if I was skinny) and I like my skin color. I use to be embarrassed of how pale I am but idc anymore. Everyone should be happy with themselves and their skin bc everyone is different. Yk how boring earth would be if we all looked the same. Anyways I just needa loose weight and be nicer and stop overthinking so much. I’ll be alright I just need to make the changes.

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hamwithcollarbones · 3 years

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(TW?) (Vent?)

Huummm..., Hi..?, Its been a while I guess, or at least feels like that, to anyone who reads this, I hope youre doing fine

Idk where to start exactly, sooo, I been exercising for the last weeks, I know its not that much, but I feel good about it, I was planning to start writing things here by october, by that point Im suppoused to have a routine or something, Im trying to give my best, but its getting each time more difficult, I just started school, and, its pretty difficult for me, actually, a lot more difficult than I tought it would be, I cant focus, I hate online school, It would be someway easier pressentialy, but Its not safe yet..., I made an exam to know at which level my knowledge is, and I got a really low percentage..., I feel like I havent leraned since I started online classes (around a year), I feel so ussless, I..., I just dont wanna do this, yk?, I feel pretty low rn, and I been feeling like that for the last weeks...

I should admit that I been thinking about certain topics, but..., as always, it doesnt helps to solve nothing..., Im a disaster, Im pretty bad at talking and specially weird / bad at texting / talking by message, I got no friends, do I?, I always think of certain people as friends, but actually.. I talk to no one, and noone talks to me except when they need something, Im not saying that its their fault, but, I..., I feel so lonely, why I always ruin everything?, Im unable to stablish good relationships, the one I consider my “best friend”..., we havent talked in months..., I really miss him, but..., I dont wanna bother him, I know that the only one who feels that way is me, he doesnt need me, he doesnt miss me, nor him nor any other person, all the ones I consider “friends”, all of them are able to keep going on, go forward, without me, Im the only one who cant, Im the only one who needs em..., Its always been like this, I give a lot of importance, I care a lot, I feel way too much for people who doesnt give a fork..., Im not trying to say that theyre bad or something, cause they arent, Im the one whos wrong...

I trully wanted to enter to this new school pressentialy cause I tought that it could be an opportunity to make friends and meet new people, but I guess I wont be able to do that..., guess Im gonna be the lonely weirdo again...

I just..., I just dont wanna be here...

hehe..., I always end up thinking the same and acting the same, even if I know which the problem is, Im not able to solve it...

I havent felt real in a long time, whats happening to me?, what happende to me?, why am I here?, nothing have sense rn and Im trying to keep going, but if I dont even know who am I, then how am I suppoused to do other things?...

Thanks to anyone who took their time to read this, I aprecciate it a lot

#ed

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stevesnailbat · 4 years

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hi baby 🥺🥺 can i request an imagine about steve with reader!girlfriend who is anorexic?? if ur uncomfortable writing it, i totally get that!! i just really struggle with my eating disorder and i wish i had a stevey to help me through it, yk? anyway i love u 🥺🥺❤️❤️

warnings: mentions of ANOREXIA/ED’S, angst

word count: 1.2K

a/n: i just wanted to add a note to this for anyone who’s reading this and is struggling with an ED, mental illness or anything of the sorts. i am always here to talk to anyone who needs it and please know that you are not alone in this fight; my inbox is open all the time. you can get through this and you are worth it!! and to the anon who wrote me this request, i love you very much ❤️ if there’s anything in this that’s horribly wrong or offensive, please let me know and i can take it down/fix it! i also wanted to include a list of crisis hotlines (these are mainly north america but i think some are international) for anyone at all who needs them. please stay safe, i love you all: YOU ARE NOT ALONE

She was really good at hiding things from Steve at first. Wearing clothes that made her look healthy, picking dates that didn’t involve going out to eat, finding ways to avoid questions that she couldn’t answer without giving herself away. Sure, she felt horrible about not telling him something that was such a big part of her life, but she didn’t want him to worry. But, it got hard after months of dating him.

Steve knew that there was something wrong when he saw her get visibly upset about going to dinner with Robin and her new girlfriend.

“It’s not that I don’t want to meet her, but I just don’t like Enzo’s and I can’t bring myself to eat their food.” she said, not daring to look up at him.

She was lying straight through her teeth and Steve could tell. When she was little, she loved going to Enzo’s. But, she slowly developed a hatred for the place, along with any restaurant in Hawkins. Steve could tell something was going wrong, that she didn’t hate the food at Enzo’s, but that she hated food in general.

“Baby, I know that’s not true.” he said, pulling her to sit next to him on his bed. “Can we—Can we talk...About you?”

“There isn’t anything to talk about, Steve.” she said, shooting him a fake smile while squeezing his hand.

“Yes there is, Y/N. I’m scared for you.” Steve said, with genuine concern in his voice. “I’m scared that you’re hurting yourself. You—You‘re working out all the time. You don’t let me touch you half the time and your skin is ice cold . I don’t even remember the last time I saw you eat, honestly.”

“Steve, stop—“

“No, I’m not gonna stop because I’m worried about you! I—I love you and I don’t want to lose you to this.” he pleaded, feeling tears prick his eyes. “I know I’m probably not telling you the right things right now or saying what you want to hear, but I want to help.”

It wasn’t how he wanted to say ‘I love you’ for the first time, but it slipped. He was concerned and wanted her to know how much he meant to her. She looked up at him finally to see the pain in his eyes, she felt like her heart broke a bit when she did. It hurt to see how much she was hurting him, but she knew how hard it’d be to change. Her habitual exercise, eating and avoidance ran her life, but she didn’t want to lose Steve.

“Will you please let me help you? Or try to at least, for me?” he begged.

“I—I can try.” she said and he engulfed her in a hug right away. “But you have to work with me on this, too.”

“Yeah, yeah, I get that. I’ll work with you on this, I just want to see you better because I do mean it, I love you.” he said, stroking her hair gently.

“I do too, Steve. I love you.” she said, cuddling against his chest.

So they tried, and tried, and tried. She wanted to give up every day, but she hit it from Steve. It was a long ass journey, but Steve was persistent. He wanted her to get better, and it seemed like she finally was. The most daunting parts for her were shortening her daily exercise to only thirty minutes a day and being able to go out to eat again.

She knew Steve was going to try to take her out to eat, and she was terrified. It was hard to avoid him, though. He checked up on her every day, on the phone or in person, and made sure she wasn’t reverting to old habits. The weekend came around one week and she knew exactly what was coming when Steve knocked on her door.

“Y/N?” he asked as they sat on the couch, his hand rubbing her back gently as she laid with her head in his lap.

“Yes?” she replied, turning over to look up at him.

“I was wondering—uh—y’know. You’ve been doing really well lately, and you’ve made a lot of progress.” he started, making her smile up at him softly. “I’m so proud of you, I really am. And I was wondering if you wanted to try to go out to eat tonight?”

“Steve, I—I don’t think that I can go into a restaurant.” she said, shaking her head nervously; he was glad she could finally be honest with him, but it was hard to get her to go out of her comfort zone because of it.

“I know that, baby. I guess I didn’t mean out to eat, specifically. But I was thinking we can try to get some food from Benny’s and bring it to the quarry? We’ll be alone with no pressure and you don’t have to finish anything, I just—I want you to try for me.” he suggested, cupping her cheek gently as he spoke. “We can make a date out of it, make it feel like it’s not a chore, right?”

“Yeah, I’ll try—I can’t make any promises, though.” she said, making him grin widely at her just for her effort.

They agreed that she wouldn’t go inside at Benny’s and that she’d try to eat fries and a milkshake, but he assured her that she didn’t have to finish it. He didn’t want to pressure her too much, but he wanted her to at least try.

Steve drove to the quarry after getting the food and she was relatively quiet in the passenger seat. He held her hand as he did and reassured her that he was proud of her. But, he tried not to remind her too much, just in case it would scare her.

He tried to distract her as he handed her the food by talking to her. He complained about his job and asked her about classes to make her think about anything but the fries sitting in front of her for a moment. It was daunting when she finally decided to eat one, but she did it anyways. He continued to make her laugh and talk while slipping in a few words of encouragement here and there. After a while, he noticed that she hadn’t drank much of the shake and that she was picking at the fries instead of eating the remaining few.

“Did you like the milkshake?” he asked, making the happy expression fall from her face.

“I—Yeah! I drank some of it.” she said, but he could tell she was lying as she smiled at him.

“Y/N...” he trailed, watching a guilty frown form on her lips.

“I—I can’t, Steve. I can’t drink it.” she said, shaking her head as tears formed in her eyes. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

“Hey, it’s okay! I just want you to be honest with me, alright? You ate almost all of those fries and you tried the shake, it’s okay that you couldn’t finish it. I don’t wanna force you to eat and then make you lose progress by you doing something bad.” he said, cupping her cheeks with his hands to wipe her tears away. “I’m happy that you even tried for me, this was further than I expected us to get tonight. I’m proud of you.”

“Thank you, Steve.” she replied, her lip quivering as she smiled up at him gratefully. “I don’t deserve you.”

“You deserve the world, baby. I’m just trying to give it to you.” he chuckled, kissing her gently. “Baby steps, right?”

“Baby steps, just baby steps.” she said, nodding as he smiled at her.

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putschki1969 · 5 years

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Hikaru×SPICE Live Broadcast ~ A summary/translation

youtube

I am finally home. Thank God the video got archived (at least for a week) so I can watch it right now and provide a more or less detailed summary.

Without further ado, let’s get started. 〈(•ˇ‿ˇ•)-��

Takeshi Kato (=TK) is doing a short intro where he explains that they are doing a live broadcast to celebrate Hikaru’s birthday. Hikaru had reached out to them and asked if it would be possible to do a short-notice broadcast. They were more than happy to help out with that. The camera points to the side to reveal Hikaru. She greets everyone and says it’s been so long since the last time they did something like this. Hikaru talks about the reason she wanted to do this live so abruptly. It’s because she reached 15.000 followers on twitter and wanted an opportunity to celebrate that with everyone. Talking about celebration. TK wishes Hikaru a happy birthday. They bring out a cake for her and she also introduces her drink for the night - tapioca milk tea (as one would expect from Hikaru).

Hikaru talks about how she fell in love with tapioca milk tea when they went to Taiwan back in 2010. Ever since then she has had an obsession (something all of her twitter followers know about). Nowadays there is a huge tapioca boom in Japan so it’s very easy for her to find new drinks to try out. She always posts her collection. TK asks everyone to send in lots of comments, questions etc by using the hashtag #Hikaruバースデー Rumor has it that something good will be happening to one of the commentors at the end of the broadcast. Hikaru is like, “ohh, yeah, I think there will be”

TK reads out some comments, mostly birthday wishes, compliments about Hikaru’s beauty, messages of gratitude and talk about tapioca. In the background they always upload a different fan art and Hikaru tries to mimic the pose from the picture. Generally she is just being super cute.

They talk about how Hikaru started twitter at around October last year and how no one believed that it was actually her. Only when she posted some proof did people finally believe it was her XD

It’s been about a year since her last live (birthday event) so TK asks her what she has been doing during all this time. Hikaru replies that she started twitter, drank lots of tapioca, ate lots of food, went to the gym, watched anime, read manga and slept. TK wants to know how it feels like now that she is not doing one live after the other as used to be the case during her time in Kalafina, all that free-time must have been weird at first. Hikaru agrees but she also says that she is not really doing anything different now than she did before. Even during her Kalafina days she would always follow her hobbies if she wasn’t busy with Kalafina stuff. But now she has more time to focus on that and of course she always tries to learn more. Since she currently can’t expand her knowledge by doing lives she has made it a habit to attend lots of lives. She mentions attending the YK Live which took place last weekend in Chiba. She talks about taking selfies with Keiko and uploading them to twitter. TK asks how it feels like to be listening from the outside. Hikaru explains that Wakana and Keiko have always performed at YK lives in the past and it has always been different from Kalafina so it’s not really anything new for her but still it felt very nostalgic to watch the live. Time to continue with fan questions. One fan asks Hikaru to which extent she likes tapioca and Hikaru is super perplexed by that, “what kind of question is that?” TK explains that the person probably meant how she likes the texture of her tapioca bubbles or the amount. Hikaru explains that she likes a lot with black tea but not so many when she is drinking something fruity. Another viewer says that the entire family is watching the broadcast on a big TV screen. Hikaru gets super embarrassed and is afraid her face will look too chubby.

They talk a bit about Hikaru’s make up and how she had to do it herself for this broadcast. She has shared the stuff she uses on twitter and usually she doesn’t really change her make up items so it should all still be the same.

TK points out that all of Hikaru’s tweets have an English translation. Hikaru explains that she tries to connect with everyone as best as possible and since she has a lof of foreign followers she always makes the effort to post in Japanese as well as in English. Hikaru says it feels great to do a live broadcast like that because it makes her feel super close to us. Then there is a message from my friend Sai-chan who is from Thailand. Hikaru greets her and says something in Thai (I guess it’s a greeting?). Either way, it sounds super cute. She is asked to recommend the best tapioca but she really can’t because it depends on your personal preference. There is just too much to choose from so you have to decide for yourself what you like and what you don’t like. It’s really difficult to answer a question like that so Hikaru asks the viewers to change the topic to something other than tapioca. She then talks about her hair and how she is currently letting it grow. She doesn’t really go to the hairsalon or anything, she just lets it grow naturally. She really loves her short hair but right now she feels like having longer hair. She used to have longer hair in the first years of Kalafina, then she cut it and kept it short for a long time and now she wants to let it grow a little longer.

Hikaru is then asked why she is suddenly going to the gym even though she hates exercising.

She still doesn’t like it, it’s super tough (especially since she did zero work outs in the pasts) but with all the tapioca milk tea she drinks she just HAS to work out. Back in the day their live performances would be her work out but now she doesn’t have that anymore so she had to find another way to stay fit. This way she will be strong when she starts performing again. There is really no other choice for her than to go to the gym, she doesn’t really like doing any other sort of activity. Thb, she doesn’t even like any of the activities at the gym either. For her, everything is torture but she has to make that sacrifice at leasr once a week in order to be able to drink her beloved tapioca.

Hikaru is overwhelmed by all the birthday wishes and says she actually doesn’t really like to receive so many congratulations. She really prefers to be the one who does the congratulating so she suggests to sing a song. Hikaru asks if it’s okay if she sings a song a capella, she thinks it should be fine, after all they did sing a bit during their Kalafina broadcasts too. She wants to sing a birthday song, it might be weird since it’s actually HER birthday today but she is sure someone out there is celebrating their birthday this month as well. She is gonna sing “Happy Happy Birthday” by Dreams Come True. She wishes everyone a happy birthday, even those who don’t celebrate their birthday today. [Ahhhhh, I loved it. Didn’t even know the song but Hikaru rocked it.] Everyone is super happy about hearing Hikaru sing live and that she actually sang so much of the song. BIG ANNOUNCEMENT ahead. The tension is palpable. Hikaru becomes super serious. And then there it is. It has been decided that she will do a SOLO LIVE!! Waaaahhhh! FINALLY!

She has been worrying a lot and felt bad because everyone on twitter has beeng asking her to start singing again, everyone wanted her to be on stage again. On the one hand it made her happy to hear those words but it was also so very frustrating. She is glad she can finally make it happen. In her time as member of Kalafina she has learned one important lesson. If there is something you cannot do by yourself, you can borrow strength from others. It was hard for her to learn since she doesn’t like asking for help but sometimes it can be fine. You have to do it and there is nothing wrong about it. Kalafina heavily relied on that and right now she is also doing it. With the help of many people, her solo live is being made possible. TK suggests they make a tweet about the solo live and Hikaru thinks it would be a good idea to include a little selfie. While Hikaru makes the tweet, TK repeats all the important info regarding the live. After a couple of minutes she finally posts her tweet. Live tweeting SUCCESS.

Hikaru is scared because the venue can seat over 2000 people. She worries no one will come and the hall will be empty. She is like, “everyone, PLEASE COME! This would be the perfect birthday present for me!” She will do lots of covers (same as her birthday event) and she asks everyone to send in requests. And of course she want to create some live goods for her concerts. She wonders what she could make. Since it’s going to be winter time she thinks warm items would be nice. TK asks what kind of live it is going to be since this is her first time doing a proper solo live. Hikaru doesn’t know yet but she is currently worrying about it. She will inform everyone if there are any further infos but right now the most important thing for her is that she can continue singing, she will figure out the rest somehow. Things like whether she will have a band or not..

The first few live goods suggestions are cominng in: a pass case, a stola (Hikaru asks if guys would even wear those?), glasses case, tapioca keyholder, a hat (Hikaru says that her hat from the b-day event was really popular), book cover, eye mask, stationary set, tapioca straw, etc... Then we have some song requests: Platinum from CCC (which she also sang at her b-day event), Speechless from Aladdin, Zankokuna Tenshi no These, Evanescence songs, winter, X-Mas songs, Hirahara Ayaka’s Jupiter, anime OPs/EDs, musical pieces, etc...Hikaru is quite intimidated by some of the song requests because she doesn’t know if she will be able to do justice to them. I am too lazy to list all the song suggestions and honestly, I don’t even know some of the titles and artists. I am pretty clueless when it comes to singers other than Kalafina. Anyways, you get the idea. Hikaru is intrigued by almost every request. She says that she particularly loves anisongs (which we already know of course). They talk a bit about Kita Wing by Nakamori Akina, ever since she was super young she loved to sing this song at karaoke. Keiko would often mention that during their radio programs.

Then they talk about outfit ideas for the live. Should she wear a skirt or pants? TK notes that Hikaru usually likes to wear pants. Hikaru agrees, they are much more convenient, it’s easy to move around. Which is also why she ended up wearing pants so often during Kalafina lives. It was so amazing when she first got to wear pants for their FOTW live. Before that Kalafina’s image had all been about skirts. She had always wanted to wear pants so to finally get to do it felt great. At that point she felt courageous enough to ask if it would be okay and everyone at the office told her that it’s totally fine, of course she can wear pants. That’s when they decided to design pants and she never looked back. Hikaru would like to know what kind of silhouette the audience wants to see, what kind of colour scheme? The majority would prefer pants (short pants XD). Hikaru considers doing an outfit change during the live so she can try different types of clothing. Hikaru will think about wearing something red even though she is not used to that. Reddish colours were always more Keiko’s image whereas Hikaru often wore blueish colours. Someone suggests Hikaru should do cosplay, Hikaru is not exactly convinced by that idea. She asks if anyone even wants to see that...? She is not really the type to do cosplay. But there are definitely a lot of cool suggestions like Shiki from KnK. Lots of people want her to have a ponytail hairstyle but she is not suó sure about it.

They are informed that there are only five minutes left till the scheduled end of the program. Time to wrap things up. More than 2000 are watching the live broadcast at that moment. CONGRATS. TK is like, “what if all those people watching right now came to the live?” Hikaru would freak out.

More promo for Hikaru’s live. Hikaru begs everyone to come and to bring lots of friends. She hopes she can show a new side of herself to the audience that already knows her from Kalafina lives. But she also hopes that lots of new people will come who have never been to a Kalafina live. She is starting with a clean slate. She wants to be the kind of singer that conveys her feelings to the audience. For her, singing is not just about producing a lovely voice, it’s about having conversations with the audience. If it weren’t for us she wouldn’t be able to sing. Time is running out. Some more promo. Hikaru hopes everyone can read the info.

Hikaru talks a bit about how her character is very straighforward and that there are not a lot of changes when it comes to the things she likes. When she likes something she will like it forever.

Hikaru doesn’t know what the live will be like but one thing is for sure, she will be singing. She is sorry she can’t say more yet but eventually things will be put into shape. Once again she thanks everyone around her for making the concert possible.

Hikaru says she was super nervous because she did the broadcast all by herself. TK then tells her that her tag is trending on twitter. BANZAI. Then they get back to that rumor which was mentioned at the very beginning of the broadcast. A little present from Hikaru. Two of the viewers that commented will receive a polaroid of Hikaru as present. Those who would like a chance to win the present need to follow the spice_anige account on twitter. TK will message the winners directly. The winner will be chosen at random among the Hikaru birthday tag. According to a previous tweet made by Hikaru, the winner has already been chosen.

Hikaru once again thanks her followers on twitter. When she first started, it felt a bit weird but now she feels very empowered. She feels like she can do everything. Big thank you to everyone.

#kalafina #hikaru #hikaru birthday live #spice #text heavy #picture heavy #video #my translations

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