Feeling unworthy and self sabotage while trying to achieve fitness goals
Do you ever feel like you don’t deserve to succeed in your fitness goals?
Like it’s just a “vanity” thing or simply you don’t deserve good things or to feel good about yourself. Maybe you spent so long feeling bad about yourself that is all you know and you think there’s no point in changing or you feel it’s impossible to change.
And as soon you start to see progress you unconsciously (or sometimes more consciously) sabotage your progress. It could all be due to an underlying feeling of unworthiness, apart from different mental health conditions that may be going on. In my case, my BPD plays a huge role in the perception I have of myself and my black and white thinking can lead to feeling like a failure if I don’t do things perfectly. Depression and anxiety are big issues for me, and body dysmorphia as well.
I think it’s one of those mental aspects of fitness and weight loss that can lead to self sabotage and it’s nowhere nearly talked about enough.
This is a gentle reminder that no matter how you’ve felt your whole life or the whole past week or day, you deserve good things. You deserve happiness and success. You deserve to be healthy and to feel good in your own skin. And you deserve to be at peace with yourself and take care of your mental health as well.
Yoga with Kassandra’s Flexible Body, Flexible Mind
For years already, 30-Day yoga challenges have been working incredibly well for me.
I love the structure, the sense of comfort the level of predictability and routine they offer, the taking away the guesswork when I get up first thing in the morning and I already know what I have to do. I love to compare my progress and see how the same poses feel differently on Day 1 and Day 30.
At the same time, I’ve learnt to be, well, more flexible! I don’t aim to do the 30 days in a row and beat myself up if I miss one day anymore. It’s more like aiming for 30 days of structured practice in the next few weeks. And that works really well for me. I’m also not ashamed to modify whatever is that I need to modify.
I started this particular challenge one year ago, almost to the date. I couldn’t finish it because my life started to fall apart and it was the beginning of what would be a really nasty divorce.
I’m in a much better place right now. I’m rising from the ashes of what was the most painful experience of my adult life. And I’m ready to tackle this challenge again, believing in myself, in the process of healing in different ways and pretty confident that I will be able to finish it this time 🙏🏼
Another week of maintenance for me! I'm literally only one kilo and a few grams away from my first milestone, so I'd better have a good, honest look at what I'm doing and see if I can reach that goal next week.
The answer is that I've been partying quite hard for what I'm actually used to! People here are lovely and unexpectedly I'm the"popular" new girl in town. Not popular like in a mean highschool girl movie, but people really like me and enjoy my company, looks like. Being a foreigner with an interesting cultural background and simply being nice seem to help.
So I've been socializing more (which is honestly fantastic!) and drinking more than usual (considering that I drink maybe once a month or once every other month, that's not hard!) and with alcohol, poor food choices are made!
I won't be crying over a bag of Salt & Vinegar crisps or flakey cheesy bread sticks here and there, but if I want the scale to get moving in the right direction again, I need to take those things into account.
When I drink alcohol it usually takes me two or three days after the fact to go back on track. I become lazy, I do less exercise and I am not as diligent preparing my own meals, keeping track of what I eat, etc. I'm not throwing a pity party, more like being honest with myself in order to go back on track again.
Poor mental health has been another issue. I haven't been able to do as much as I usually do, but I'm proud of choosing healthier ways to cope, like actually going for a walk.
Walking has been my main form of exercise and I love it! Time to incorporate more strength training and yoga again.
That's all for this week. Time to get back on track. I deserve to take good care of myself and reach my goals ❤️ And I want to wear all my cute favorite clothes again!