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sl33py-g4m3r · 8 days

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May have posted about this before; however, I'm doing it again...

that post last night with the little footnote got me thinking about it again..... unfortunately..... It's just a cat and mouse game with no discernible outcome as I can't make up my mind as to what's true...

Am I trans or not?

Or am i just uncomfortable being female for some other reason?

I don't know how to see myself tbh....

Like I don't see myself as female really, despite obviously being biologically female....

but at the same time idk.... Am I trans or not? It's something that's been bugging me off and on since I've been a young adult...

mom dressed me in dresses when I was really young, then I stopped wearing them at some point but didn't exactly dress like a boy either. Just androgynous because kid... Got called moms son once at an eye appointment, that made me happy a bit back then. But I didn't know what gender/sex was back then. Then the boys were helping me in second grade because I'm legally blind, and they wanted to help. The girls were mean to me cause I was getting the attention that they wanted I guess.... It's been a while. So 6-7 year old me snuck scissors into the school bathroom to cut my long hair off; thinking it would make me a boy i guess. It didn't. and sadly enough dad even kept a lock of the hair I had cut off. Had had it short ever since. well that's a lie actually; I grew it out in 2012-2014, and let it get quite long, tailbone length long, then I stopped caring for it, biggest mistake ever, and it got cut short once more.

I've struggled with what I know now as some pretty bad anxiety and ptsd from childhood that idk if is playing a part but that's beside the point i think...

Never really saw myself in terms of boy or girl as a kid; I just was.. I got called a boy a few times which made me kinda happy but I didn't know why.

Then eventually the horrors of puberty showed up; I began wearing sweaters and jackets at school and out all the time. and became very insecure about myself, moreso than I already was. But with things that came up I dealt with.

Didn't think about it again until young adulthood when I found tumblr and lurked for a bit. learning what "transgender" was and wondering if I was that if I was so uncomfortable being female.

idk if it was just the anxiety or something, or the fact that everyone's taller than my 150 cm ass........ Or that I'm insecure cause I'm blind from a legal standpoint or what....

I began wondering what it was like to be seen or be a male in society. How would I be treated differently if I were seen as a male?

I asked the wrong person the wrong questions and was SA'd as a result; but things could've been much worse, that they could've.

I dropped it and thought it went away; but it hasn't... Hell that SA incident was what got me into therapy and realizing that I have anxiety and ptsd from childhood to begin with, lol. and maybe mildly autistic but that isn't actually diagnosed at all.

So now the "am I a trans guy" just pops up from time to time, I think about it a while, and then drop it again.

I thought I'd talked to mom about it a long while ago; how I felt being female and that I didn't want to be, talked to an aunt about it too. They both just said that; "god made you female for a reason". so I dropped it once again.

tried getting the therapy office to use a male name and pronouns for me; but that just sounded odd after almost 30 years of being referred to by my birth name and sex. so it felt really weird and I never officially implemented it, reverting it before it went into effect as a test run.

So is it because I'm short? Because I'm disabled? Because I'm female? What makes me so insecure of myself and unsure of everything?

I question and second guess everything for the most part... and still don't know how to see myself.

all of my OC's that I've made throughout all of the fandoms I've been in (sonic, naruto, etc. and even my own original character that I've made independently of any fandom) had been male.

would I have more confidence in myself if I were male? Or is it something else?

It might be a bunch of things all at once that I'm not understanding...

I'm just very confused to whom I am and had been for many years....

and I can't pay with the "crossdressing to be read as male" because it's very obvious that I'm female anyway....

So am I actually trans or is there a bunch of stuff going on under the surface that I'm unaware of and that's whats causing me to feel this way?

Even if I were a guy; I'd still be short, still be emotional, still like cute things probably, would be bullied perhaps for being emotional and shy, and being shy might be cuter in females anyway.... idk......

Male or female, I'd still be me...

and I have no idea who I am or how I come off to people

aside from "too nice for my own good" or "the blind one" or idk what else. I know I shouldn't care how people look at me and think but i do anyway......

I hate how that post last night threw me into thinking about this... Hopefully posting about it will help somehow...

Do I come off as male or female on the internet?? Before I outed myself as female what was thought of me?? I don't like disclosing that because I worry that doing so would get people acting smarmy towards me and be creepy...

sad boi gender rant over.....

I'm sorry for subjecting you all to sad boi hours like 2 days in a row... or the same one...... idk

enjoy the self examination as well as the confusion that comes along with it....

I genuinely don't know what to think about myself at this point....

all I do know probably for sure tho is that if I were a guy I'm assuming I'd be a femboy; cause I'd like soft, fluffy, cute things still... and still be a pacifist.... the opposite of the tomboy i was as a child... maybe...

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austajunk · 1 month

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Okay this is kinda a odd one but can you do Makoto x Number One? Maybe Number One discovered Makoto is his homunculus, and decided he wanted to see just how accurate of a clone he is, down to the very last detail... Makoto being a bit emotional since it's his original while Number One is simply cold, observant

Idk, it's always so interesting to see Makoto in a non-dominant position ! As for prompt numbers, let's say... 3, 7 and 19? But I'm not really picky, do whatever feels right.

Anyway, have a nice day and thank you!!!

Wooo, this was a really hard challenge to write mostly because we only have so much to go on for Number One's true nature. I hope you liked my interpretation for how he would be if he knew of Makoto's existence (whether he canonly did or didn't, I do not know).

Triggers: Dubious Consent, Anal Sex, Mild Orgasm Control, Mild Nipple Play, and Light Bondage

Fic beneath the cut!

The Unified Government couldn't hide their little secret project of producing Homonculi for long from the WDO. Careful and organized as they were, the detectives of the world managed to infiltrate their plot and gather information before they could even be detected by the top handlers of the project. It wasn't long before a file was on the leader, Number One's, desk, staring him ominously in the face.

Even if the WDO could see this ambitious and reckless project coming from a mile away, there was still no way to stop it from proceeding forward. It expanded and grew beyond their control, giving birth to homonculi produced by the best DNA samples the researchers could get.

Number One placed his hands behind his back, towering over the file and picture of his own face staring back at him from his desk. It was a mirror. An eerie, unnatural mirror. Somehow... somewhere... his DNA had been taken. It was valuable to the world. His mind... his development... everything about it...

It was now possessed by them.

Number One brushed his thumb over the copy of his face from the various files. The being was usually in a tank or strapped down to some sort of operating table. Various shots and angles of his body matched everything Number One could fathom about himself. It left him feeling cold and detached, wondering if he was awake in the real world. What had they created? Would there be more?

He scooped the file up into his arms after gazing at the name bestowed on this new experiment. Makoto. Makoto Kagutsuchi. Perhaps they meant to have him transferred for further testing. Before they would do that, Number One had to confirm a few things. He had to know.

Who was this person who looked like him? What did he feel or know? Did he know of him? The real one? Did ge know that he was just a copy... not even that, but a monstrous imitation created in a cold, glass tube?

Number One wanted to know Makoto Kagutsuchi.

He fastened his dark cloak over his shoulders and tucked the files beneath his arm. The world outside contained nothing but a black, overcast night, covering him as he traveled swiftly to the lab where his copy rested.

It was a mirror.

The being rested on the examination table, strapped down but undisturbed. That round and unassuming face, the pale skin, the platinum hair that was Number One's very real hair color... they all belonged to him but were worn and represented on the body of another being. It wasn't human. Even just approaching Makoto as he slept assured Number One of that.

He stared over the creature. His purple locks of hair clung to his cold cheeks from traveling through the light rain outside. Number One hesitated, letting his hand drift over the creature's face, but he still gave in.

Makoto wasn't dressed. It was clear the lab was in the progress of doing some more work on his body, but they had stopped for the day. Number One ran his cool fingers across the bare flesh of Makoto's flat stomach. The homonculus stirred slightly, his lips parting to release a small breath.

Immediately, Number One withdrew his hand and exhaled, almost alarmed at the slightest sign that Makoto was, indeed, real and alive. Makoto shifted but didn't get far due to his limbs being strapped quite down. Watching him, Number One fought the urge to turn away in a brisk fashion to hide his morbid fascination. He could hear the creature blissfully sigh behind him in his sleep. There was a tightness in Number One's chest, one he couldn't ignore no matter how hard he tried.

"You're real," he breathed to himself. He returned to glancing down at Makoto and his soft features. Their bodies matched so perfectly. His hand glided down Makoto's waist until he was hovering just over his core. Makoto's flaccid cock hung in between his legs, just inches from Number One's fingers.

"Ah..." A light gasp left Number One's lips. He lowered his gaze at the pretty creature... was it wrong to think of his mirror image as desirable? He was utterly mesmerizing. A breathing, living perfect image.

"It's wrong..." He said under his breath. It was wrong for this person to exist. He existed. Wasn't one of him enough for the world? What could Makoto do for everyone else? Why did he exist? An unavoidable heat rose in the pits of his stomach. He inched closer to Makoto's face, brushing the small strands of blond hair from his cheeks.

Sure enough, those violet eyes softly opened and met his gaze. Those were his eyes.

In Makoto's eyes, Number One could see the homonculus wading through the same horrifying mystery that he was enraptured with. Makoto stared at him, his eyes widening with acknowledgment, fear, and hazy disbelief all at once. Number One paused. Surely... he knew what he was, didn't he?

"You..."

Makoto's mouth moved. That small voice left his lips accompanied by a shudder through his lithe body. Number One wanted to cover his lips, to stifle the same voice they both shared. It confused him, made him feel... lesser and stranger at the same time.

"You're the real one..." Makoto said at last. His eyes gained a glossy sheen, almost on the verge of tears at this revelation. "The one I was made after-"

"..." How hollow Number One felt when he couldn't deny it. He was so perfect. Just utterly a flawless copy of everything. With his own innocent features staring back at him, the ball of flames and fury gripped his chest inside of him and could no longer be ignored. His urges became him, taking control of his mind whilst logic simply melted away.

Number One swept over the Homonculus, held his gaze for a moment to instill a sense of domination, and placed his lips over Makoto's own. He gripped Makoto's shoulders and held him in place, possessively taking what his body demanded of him. He let his tongue freely probe between Makoto's lips, fighting past the creature's feeble resistance. He could feel Makoto's jaw clench, his body close off in an attempt to guard itself from what Number One wanted to take. He ignored the homonculus and kissed him deeper, swabbing his tongue. They fought until Makoto nipped at his tongue, and Number One drew back like a rebuffed animal.

He hadn't meant to be particularly ravenous towards the creature, but staring at him filled him with nothing but the need to take control. To assert some sort of proof that he was Number One! That he was the real one. This burst of emotions wasn't like him at all...

"Why did you do that?" Makoto's uneven voice broke the silence between them. It was a lighter voice than his own, not weighed down by the hundreds of detective cases that Number One had been through. There was something more innocent within his voice, something that seemed so much more playful and carefree. Even when it was scared and confused. "Why are you here?"

His eyes narrowed to the bindings around his wrists and ankles. Patches of redness swelled at the areas where was bound. Undoubtedly, he often busied himself with tugging around when he was being "worked on".

"I... I can't believe it's really you. I always thought that I wanted to see you... that I would feel something a connection," said Makoto. It was like he was searching for the right words to reach someone on the other side of the world from him. The desperation in his face... it pulled Number One closer to him. "I just wanted to know you and see if I could understand why I was born...like this..."

He trailed off wearily as Number One approached him again. The human swept his fingers across Makoto's pale hand, touching briefly upon the red sores and wounds at his wrist.

"I..." Number One hung his head. "I won't be able to give you that. I'm sorry. I'm only here to observe you and understand what you're capable of..."

Makoto stiffened, a shudder breaking through his imprisoned body. "What will you-?"

Number One cut him off by sliding his thumb over one of his bare nipples, earning him a small groan from his specimen. "Do you feel this, hm? Your body and mine... I wonder if we both like the same things..." He busied himself by lowering to Makoto's chest and taking the other nipple between his lips.

A compulsion to stimulate his other self took over his mind's trajectory. He wanted the homonculus to experience pleasure and pain through him: his true self. He swirled his tongue diligently around Makoto's nipples, using his right hand to massage and pluck the other one. His clothed chest smothered Makoto, making sure he knew that he couldn't escape. Rapidly and lightly, he flicked his tongue over the sensitive nub until Makoto was squealing and twitching. His nipples hardened into sweet, little cherries between Number One's lips and the human made sure to take his time in drawing him out. He kissed his chest, occasionally lingering to appreciate Makoto's warmth or his strangely earthy scent. There was something almost natural and organic about the creature beneath his body.

Dipping back down over and over again to partake in Makoto's body, Number One found he couldn't get enough. He suckled greedily upon his chest until the homonculus winced and cried out for him. He didn't know Number One's name, letting the detective savor his confusion and anxiety like a predator. This creature was untouched and new to the world. Fresh to be introduced to pleasure and watched and studied for it. It was captivating to watch him tremble and react just like he did when he was touched.

And he did.

Makoto whimpered. He bucked and pulled against the bindings, letting them dig deeper into his sore flesh as long as it meant that he could experience more. His body had to react to Number One's movements. Like the mirror that he was, he followed his original self, looking to mimic him. His lips curled into a pleasured sigh, panting out incoherent phrases. Number One couldn't get tired of hearing his own voice moan back to him.

He sank lower, kissing down his stomach until his nose nuzzled against the small patch of blonde pubes on the homonculus. He pressed a small kiss against his waist, watching Makoto curl against the straps binding him to the table.

"Please... I want more," Makoto quickly told him. Desperation and lust etched into his facial features, his gaze led Number One down to the hard cock between his legs.

"I'm sorry," said Number One coldly. His hand traced Makoto's generous length. His cock was a pleasant handful for a brand new creation, but Number One wasn't curious for Makoto's pleasure. "This isn't about you. I only want to know you for myself."

Watching Makoto sour and swallow, he pulled away from his cock. Instead, Number One found the switch in the table to loosen the bindings around Makoto's legs. Gently, he guided Makoto's limbs over his shoulders and unzipped his pants.

"I want to know..." He said in a hot breath, tugging his cock out from his trousers. "What do you feel like on the inside?"

Makoto blinked, a bead of sweat trailing down his chest. "You want to...feel me there? Ah..." His pale cheeks darkened with specs of pink, a knowing quiver of anticipation running through his body. His erection wouldn't fade.

Number One nodded, a light smirk tugging upon his lips. He placed himself at Makoto's tight entrance. The idea to lubricate his other self crossed his mind, but rather... he wanted to make his mark on the homonculus, to enjoy him open and raw. It would be painful for the both of them, and he preferred it that way. The homonculus, on the other hand, trembled no matter what he did. Everything was new to him.

"Don't come until I say so... until you truly feel it," said Number One, brushing Makoto's erection with the side of his palm. He gave his girth a squeeze until his captive let out a small squeal of obedience, and then, he let go.

His cock sized up Makoto's entrance, rubbing himself until he realized how hard and ready Number One was to experience him.

"I...I want it," pleaded Makoto, trying to rise against the bindings. He couldn't. There was no hope for him. But he ached for this beautiful thing called touch. No matter how selfish his original self was in indulging himself, the homonculus was drowning in every new experience after the other. Pain. Pleasure. It was exhilarating. "Please put it inside me...!!!"

Number One obliged. The first two inches slid inside. The wails that came after told him that Makoto was coming close to his first brush with true pain. The sense of loss that he gained from something being taken as Number One split his ass apart.

"Relax," he ordered Makoto. "You don't want us to get caught, do you?" The entire world could crashing in on them in an instant, but Number One found he didn't care. He was so close to knowing... to truly seeing how much this mirror really reflected him.

Makoto winced, his face curling in distress. Number One found that his walls contracted around him, trying to stretch to accommodate his length. "It hurts..." He noted to himself as though Number One wasn't there. "I feel so full, so warm... like something...ngh... is melting within me..."

His vision fuzzed, lowering back to the table. Number One secured his legs on his shoulders and drove into him harder to increase those anxious, needy moans. He wouldn't slow down. He wouldn't give Makoto the option to breathe in between his thrusts. Speeding up, their hips clapped together in an ecstatic meeting, sending the heat to each other mutually until they both grunted with a reckless abandon.

"Fuck..." Number One groaned. If this person was a creature to him, then what was he? He just didn't know anymore. With each slam inside of Makoto, he lost himself more and more. No. He wanted to be lost in this rapture...

When he opened his eyes, Makoto was against the table, writhing with his chest caked in sweat. His cock drooled from a sweet, unhinged orgasm. His first orgasm. On instinct, Makoto melted back in the glow as his cock spurted a healthy rope on his torso as Number One drove inside him to the hilt.

"You c-came...hn..." It wasn't as how Number One had pictured it. He thought he had the control but perhaps Makoto Kagutsuchi was full of surprises.

Still, he had reached his limit as well. Buried balls deep into the homonculus, Number One bucked and expelled his thick line of warm seed in Makoto's ass. He bucked again, wanting to go deeper and deeper to spread more of himself inside this being until he simply couldn't. He groaned, slipping out of Makoto's ass with a soft pop, his cum leaking between his cheeks as he did so.

The sweet haze of his climax had him resting against the homonculus. With his ear placed against Makoto's chest, he could hear each soft beat. He felt his breaths, gentle and evening out ever so slightly. Their warm bodies mingled together like two pieces of a puzzle that fit just so perfectly. Number One wanted to lie on Makoto and watch him as much as he could. He wanted to take in his unassuming features, the quiver of his body whenever he was touched or caressed.

But the world was coming back to him faster now that his release had left him. He glanced down at the thing he had just desecrated, the creation he had wanted to assert himself over. Why... Why had he done this?

Quickly, he threw himself off of Makoto and adjusted his pants and cloak. Makoto tried to raise himself up, but once again, he was held in place by those straps. The cry in his throat almost caught Number One off guard, making him want to stop and look back to him.

"Wait! Don't leave me here! I don't want to be this!" Makoto tried to call out to his other self. His eyes teared up as his fists curled into his palms. "I can't be here forever! I don't want to be just a thing made after you!!"

This time, there was a note of rage in his voice. It was unmistakable to Number One. But he refused to turn back to the captive. No. He was never here. He couldn't listen. Makoto Kagutsuchi existed and he would continue to exist... but he couldn't soil that existence any further...

Homonculi shouldn't be meant for this. These feeling, living, and breathing things shouldn't be meant for some sick, government science experiment.

No matter how much Makoto called for him, Number One refused to turn back to him. What would happen if he did? If he went to Makoto's side and released him out into the world to live his life? Would he have a life? Would the government find him and return him to where he was? Would he be the source of misery for hundreds of thousands of civilians across the world?

Why did Makoto Kagutsuchi exist?

Number One ignored the last shriek Makoto made for him to come back and help him, disappearing through the lab door and back out in the night. His face was contorted through shame and agony, his body still washing away the warmth he had shared with his other self...

"I hope you disappear one day, Makoto... I hope no one ever finds you..."

But that was foolish thinking. Makoto existed. More were to come from this. Number One gritted his teeth as the cold, night air greeted him.

Why did they have to exist?

#mdarc #master detective archives: rain code #rain code #rain code spoilers #yuma kokohead #makoto kagutsuchi #number one #kokotsuchi #makoyuma #nsft prompts #thanks for the ask!#mannnnn this felt like writing a fic for Number One from Kids Next Door lol #but also it was very angsty to write #writing prompts

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bizzyb3e · 2 years

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Spoiler free review, spoilers below cut

I just watched the School for Good and Evil movie and wow

Overall, I’m pretty disappointed. It was a fun watch, don’t get me wrong, it was fun picking out familiar characters and seeing them on screen, and the story is alright, but it just felt… lacking? Like most of the characters go unnamed, and it’s frustrating for people who have read the books and enjoy those side characters. The plot also felt very rushed. I watched it with my mom, who has never touched the books, and she said she felt like she was missing some context at certain parts, like some scenes and reasonings didn’t quite make sense yet.

And the CGI was pretty inconsistent? Like in some scenes it would be incredible and others it looked very… choppy? Idk, it felt like it was changing styles every two seconds.

However, I do think that despite the rough storyline (which is still alright) the actors did the best they could with what they were given. And the costumes were absolutely gorgeous.

There’s still a few nitpicky things but I don’t really feel like typing it all out cuz it’s late and I’m tired. ALTHOUGH I am going to rant about the characters and cut scenes from the book now, so spoilers below.

oh boy oh boy do I have complaints:

WHERE WAS THE WONDERFUL GORGEOUS AMAZING SCENE BETWEEN AGATHA AND DOVEY ABOUT AGATHA REALIZING SHE WAS BEAUTIFUL???? Reading that scene as a kid literally brought me to tears bc I was super self-conscious about myself, and it is my favorite scene in the entire series. AND ITS NOT THERE? 1568 wounded and 182 dead.

speaking of Agatha, while I love Sofia wylie, she was?? Too pretty?? like whenever the other characters would call her “witch” or “ugly” it just didn’t land bc she was literally gorgeous. And she blended in too well with the Evers, the whole point is she’s an outsider, she sticks out, but she fit right in. Wasnt goth enough :<

wth was the “blood magic” crap. Like huh

NO SWAN SYMBOLS ON UNIFORMS??? Like they even include the school insignia in the beginning, WHATS THE POINT IF THERES NO SWANS

while I can appreciate the chemistry that they gave tedros and agatha in the movie, I really wish that they had included more rivalry. Bc those two literally hated each other in the books.

Also Sophie talked about tedros being her “true love” for like two seconds and then it was pushed to the side. Like. He’s kinda the reason she goes full evil and all, but their relationship was just?? Nonexistent. Like she wears a few good outfits and suddenly their testing their love for each other in the trial by tale.

trial by tale was done DIRTY. Instead of being a massive school-wide competition between schools, they turned it into some flimsy tophie thing that literally only lasted like 10 minutes tops. That was such a big deal in the book pls

WHERE IS SIR AUGUST SADER??? MY MANS WHO HAD AGATHAS BACK.

They were missing so many characters???? Like Castor and Pollux and Uma and the BEAST FROM THE DOOM ROOM WHICH IS A WHOLE OTHER RANT. Also a BUNCH of the characters just. Go unnamed. Like do they even introduce Kiko or Chad. And even the characters who are seem so bland and forgettable.

THE BEAST. THE DOOM ROOM. THE WONDERFUL SCENE WHERE YOU SEE SOPHIE’S TRUE EVIL. GONE. Like what was that.

Where were anadil’s rats??? How hard is it to get rats???

also anadil and dot seemed way too similar. And Hester’s character was inconsistent. Also dot not being played by a larger actor lowkey bugs me.

Sophie did NOT get to be evil enough smh

CIRCUS OF TALENTS ANYONE HELLOOOOO????

I know they kinda revealed what happens to failed students but not revealing that theyre the werewolves and fairies was so disappointing.

I cant believe we didn’t get Sophie singing T^T it’s not a big issue, but I still wanted to include it bc Sophia ann Caruso (her actor) was literally ON BROADWAY. My girl can SING. LET HER SHOW OFF.

no pink fingerglow for sophie :<

RAFAL IN GENERAL? Like what was that. He just walks around school disguised as his brother? Casually jump scares Agatha?? NO MASK?? genuinely upset me

also not really a criticism to the movie, but watching it on screen made me realize how creepy rafal and Sophie’s relationship actually is. Like. Yikes.

Upset that Yuba didn’t get enough spotlight

Also I wish they got the chance to show off the “room of champions” or whatever it was for both schools. Or Arthur’s menagerie. But I can live without it.

Sophie and Agatha not knowing about the schools in the beginning?? Like huh?? Sophie has dreamed about going there her whole life what do you meannnn

Honora being mean to Sophie rubbed me the wrong way. Like she’s supposed to be a very plain and nice woman, and I felt like Sophie still disliking her despite that gave Sophie’s character more depth

WHERE. ARE. THE. DREAMS. The nemesis dreams, Agatha’s true live dreams, WHERE ARE THEY? they could have helped explain so much for why Sophie was just suddenly like “oh yeah you’re my nemesis” and tedros declaring his love. Also they DIDNT talk about nemesis symptoms at all. At least that I remember. It felt so random when Sophie started turning into the witch.

okay im gonna end it with some positive things cuz I’ve just been ranting lmao

Loved lady lesso ngl. So gay for her.

having tedros not kill some unnamed kid as a gargoyle, but a kid that we got to actually know was a lot more satisfying. Really got the point across

HESTADIL CRUMBSSSSSS

honestly I was worried that they would chicken out of making Sophie ugly as a witch, but they did alright with it. Kudos.

Tedros and Agatha chemistry yesssss. When she tripped and he caught her>>>

Yes anemone POP OFF QUEEN

the wish fish scene was GORGEOUS

I liked the bit of background they gave Gavaldon. Like Agatha and Sophie’s classmates talking to them. That was nice :]

I honestly enjoyed covey’s character. She was a little manic at times, and a little different from the books, but I thought it fit the movie well. And I cracked a few smiles at it

Tedros and Agatha again. Sassy Agatha in their first conversation <3333

the ever Boys’ entrance was well done :>

Hester’s demon was FANTASTIC and absolutely sick

HORT MY BABY YES KING

that’s all I really have the brainpower to think about and write down. Also this became way longer than I thought it would. I had to rant about it somewhere cuz my friends haven’t watched nor read it and my mom didn’t want to hear it lol. Anyway, those are just my opinions on the movie. Even though I had a lot to complain about, the movie was still an enjoyable watch. It’s always cool seeing familiar characters in live action :D

#I’m already bracing myself for the queerbaiting allegations #but yeah that’s movie was okay #pretty disappointed but I’ve simmered down after typing this all out #the school for good and evil #sge movie #dont feel like tagging all the characters #long post

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bifidonut · 1 year

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wow it’s been a while since I’ve done a little ask game, ty @wackmxter ✨

(apparently the app doesn't let you copy more than one line of text at a time 🥴 so now that i finally am opening my laptop this week here i am)

15Qs / 15 Mutuals

lol idk if i even have 15 (active) mutuals these days so uhhhh i'll just tag @asthma-goddess @actualhero @j1r4ch2 @uglyluckylucky and if anyone else wants to do this one go nuts, i'm not tagging more people because i'm shy 👉👈

1. Are you named after anyone?

nah my mom got my name from a baby name book in the 90s BUT what's wild is that she gave me and my brother Irish names based on the fact that she was told my grandma's birth family was Irish... which is wild because we had no proof of that until like 2 years ago when she was able to find half of my grandma's birth family thru those genetic testing family tree sites. so it's a good thing that was true because it would have been kinda weird in hindsight if we weren't

2. When was the last time you cried?

um 🧍‍♀️. like an hour ago while i was in the shower... i think i'm PMSing a little bit because it kinda came on suddenly and then i was fine lol

3. Do you have kids?

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

listen if you lived with my boyfriend you would too

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

hmmm idk beyond basic physical appearance stuff like height/hair color/whatever i guess maybe their sense of style and how they seem to present themselves?

6. What’s your eye color?

hazel

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

bold of you to assume those are mutually exclusive, person who wrote this initially! anyways both.

8. Any special talents?

i think i'm fairly perceptive, and i'm also good at blowing bubbles

9. Where were you born?

colorado 🏔🦌⛺

10. What are your hobbies?

scrolling on my fucking phone forever if we're being real but i also like cooking, baking, video games, listening to podcasts, and maybe someday getting back into reading

11. Have you any pets?

12. What sports do you play/have you played?

i played soccer for like. a year not even when i was 6 or 7. i'm a delicate flower though so sports weren't really ever my thing lol

13. How tall are you?

5' 1"

14. Favorite subject in school?

science or biology specifically in hs

15. Dream job?

been thinking about this lately... currently i work in the R&D department of a biotech company and i like it a lot for the most part, and in general i really enjoy being a research scientist but i don't think it's a job i want to be in forever... in no small part because the role i'm in now is sort of "entry" level, so you're sort of naturally expected to rise through the ranks over the years but these days it just gets harder and harder to do that without a master's degree or higher. so i think i might go back to school once i decide what kind of specialty i would want to be in and then i think settling into a more established scientist role could be nice. but honestly i also think i'd make a pretty decent lab manager since i'm insane lol. also considered pivoting into science writing for a spell because i think that could be something i could do on a part time/freelance basis if i find myself in the family way but idk.

tl;dr i currently do science and would like to keep doing science without ruining my hands by pipetting for like 40 years

#keelposting #about

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insert-neologism · 2 months

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decided to not make a whole analysis bc. thats much so im just gonna like write my thoughts to each line! slay.

spiracle by flower face - notes

!!i dont have like many symbolism here yet. and with that i mean almost nothing; i was mainly, like, testing the waters or smth bc it was the first one etc and i wasnt really familiar with anything just yet.

I want your quiet, your screaming and thrashing

jackie's quiet, shauna isnt.

The salt on your lips and the hands that god gave you

'salt' -> ocean -> water

And I want your violence, your silent sedation(....) who ever she killed not sure

violence is pretty obvious i think; sedation sounds kinda sterile to me and the clip too

Your moon eyes, your telescope,

literally had no other ideas

morbid fixation

it does seem. morbid sorta

And I want your pyro,

fire

your born-again virgin

she wasnt a vigrin when she died. but for a pretty long time. and shes like 'born again' in shaunas mind yk??

Your hands on my insides, your fingertips crawling

makes sense

And I want your Jesus,

I THINK she sorta looks like holy?? savior typa IDK how to say that. but it reminds me of jesus.

your suicide mission

died

Your lips on the microphone,

bc shes like leading, actively the captain

soft disposition

looks rlly soft <3

And I want your parties,

party

the shark in your water

fit somehow im not sure anymore ahhh also dont have any notes. but i still think it fits

The scrapes on your knees and the blood that spills over

blood that spills over = cheating

And I want your zeroes,

sorta seems at a low point

your polluted marrow

.sorta obvious i think

The sweat on your palms and

bc shes like nervous, she doesnt know what to say

your surveillance shadow

she still there, in the distance, watching over shauna and she cant get closer; if jackie is a shadow, then shauna is the light.

I want your secrets,

fits with jackies line

your clementine fields

i googled clemetine meaning and it means innocence and i thought that fit like rlly well

The ropes that you climb up,

sorta a stretch; the ropes are jeff (that shes climbing for a 'normal', heterosexual life). jackie wants this (otherwise she wouldntve been with jeff pre crash) but shauna is the one to eventually actually climb them/marry him.

the parts that won't heal

still succumbs to violence or however you want to call it. thought it more fitting to her killing adam bc the rabbit required like precision n shit

I want your safe word,

idk

your passive resistance

shauna doesnt want it, but still isnt active.

The sickness you foster, your favorite addictions

quite obvious too i think. personally one of my fav parts

And I want your nightmares, the ghost in your doorway

shes a ghost, shes in something sort of resembling a doorway

Your paralyzed sleep and your- [scream]

thought it was funny, also it is indeed true. if i like had to choose then the scream is my fav part i think esp bc it just lines up so wellll like the death scene and everything really

I want you, butterfly, I want you, sailor

actually asked sb what theyd say who is who but since ive watched it like a feww times and: jackie is the butterfly bc shes a beautiful (and seen as such) and fragile (was the first to die). also she has a butterfly shirt (which is worn by shauna later on - which was actually the reason I asked sb! bc i was unsure if i should use shauna in the shirt. but then i decided against it, mainly bc i didnt like the vibe of the clip and i wanted them to interact). the symbolic meaning of butterflies doesnt really fit her (transformation, change, growth)(really its more the opposite) BUT it doesnt fit shauna as well.

shauna is the sailor bc she like sailed away and left jackie behind, a million miles apart and unable to do anything but to dream of each other (which jackie is doing then). technically, jackie is leaving here, but this is still jackies last goodbye (even though its imagined)

I am your lover and I am your jailor

originally 'I am your lover' was supposed to be 'thats not what youre hungry for' but i changed it. Not sure why (like id do it again but idk why) but its like. shes (the picture) her lover shes gone she wont (cant) ever come back (not rlly) shes representing everything that was and thats been lost (everything thats irredemable. shauna herself.) shes her lover but shes not real (shes not even a hallucination that only shauna can see, but a picture that everyone can see and does see bc its on a really big screen on a get-together with many people; shes not shaunas, she doesnt belong to shauna which she never has - even though thats all that shauna wants. (I think jackie thinks, or at least feels otherwise. whcih shauna doestn know, of course, cause their communication is ATROCIOUS)). shes never been real, actually, cause whats shown on the screen is the jackie that shes been showing them, not the one she really is (today she is pretending for shauna, too. she doesnt, cant see her real self, who she really is; theres nothing beneath the surface of 'jackie, homecoming queen' anymore)

shauna is the jailor bc she wont let jackie go. in doing that (and in living the life jackie was supposed to live, represented by jeff being with her at the function) shes also her own jailor

#LONG POST #like fr guys #anyways #sorta got out of hand at the end lol #i want to stress for anyon who reads the tags first: there was NOT much symbolism in there. mostly just 'lol ill look where thisll go'#if youre here for that #if not idk knock urself out #a glimpse in my sick and twisted psyche #mitos incredible life #jackieshauna: The Shark In Your Water

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smollobsession · 2 months

Text

25.3.

I'm 40. damn bro.

I finished Mark's book about not giving a fuck and it was really good.

there was a part about death that i found most intriguing, saying that if death is inevitable you might as well live until it comes. which is true and something i've been struggling with since my mom died.

Idk now if I said it in the last post but I also finished Dan's book and it was so helpful, I really wish I could force my teens to read it. (lovingly)

i'm now listening to "because internet" which is a fun linguistic study of internet language.

today i finally made crepes on the crepe maker E gave me ages ago. depression had a hold on me so i couldn't try it for ages but finally i'm there! i need to buy milk and mineral water for good pancakes but the experiment was a success!

in pogo news, I did groudon and kyogre raids and ... got nothing special :D but raiding was fun :D annoying tho that it's obvious you just can't have certain pokemon on certain levels. i played with my secondary, much lower account, and it just wouldn't let me catch groudon, even tho i won 3 raids for it. boo.

This weekend was Intense.

On friday i had my korean lesson and then met up with F for Zone of Interest. It was a great movie, I was immersed in it to the point that I kinda forgot it wasn't present. I also couldn't help but draw parallels to gaza but apparently I'm not allowed to talk about that.

Satuday was raid day and then Sunday I went to the protest. This time I got a flag and I made it all the way to the end of the protest! (minus the dancing, i went home for that :D ) it was ok despite my horrific anxiety making my back hurt and some details I didn't like (a guy spilled a bag of flour to prove some point but like... why are you spilling food while pointing out people are staving pls.) it was quite interesting how I spent most of the day today trying to see myself in pics and vids of the protest and only found ONE pic. soothes my anxiety a little, knowing i'm invisible :D

i've been following exercises from here and i've been increasing the number and length, i'm pleased! My flat is currently fairly clean and things are mostly in their place. yay mental health? and on the note of mental health i'm working on my fic again slowly too.

I did end up buying all the currently published Mo Dao Zu Shi comics :D which is 5 :D oh well! I'm also going to get a in person local Korean teacher. It'll cost a bit but it's fine I hope. Meanwhile I tested spotify and i don't like it. the organization is sadly a mess. the main feature i miss is the ability to see all songs by an artist. without that, their whole app is useless to me. I watched cooking crush and it's a really good show, I recommend it to all my friends now :D even tho the asian parent thing... it's not for me. i'm too chill toward my family even for my culture.

I got tickets for a musical in april, which i'll see with a student. (and another student is in the musical!)

had some good talks with my therapist, mainly about whether or not i care about being fat. i combined this with a chapter from mark's book, and it's quite simple i think. do i care? somewhat. certainly some mobility is not as it should be and i def want to fix that part. but a lot of my feelings about my own body are from outside. and he talks about how wanting to be something isn't the same as wanting to do the work for it, and that's basically it. would i like to be skinny? sure. am i willing to do the work for it? ... not? really? at least not now.

anyway exams are approaching, the end of this career is approaching. i'm chewing on that but so far i haven't reached anything specific. i need to write an email to the company i'm gonna ask for help, so this is my reminder to do that tomorrow :D

happy skz day :D my babies are 6! <3

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what-if-nct · 5 months

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hi!!! mind if i ask for some advice >-<, i'm in high school and i think my best friend likes me more than platonically. i've kinda had an inkling since we both kinda tested the waters at homecoming (barely, we only almost kissed) but that was the only instance i've ever done anything, bc i've never seen her in that light ever :( (multiple parts bc this is long im sorry 😭)

like that and i dont want to hurt her feelings. i'm also confused bc she ALMOST never says anything about it sober, and even talks about liking someone else. another iffy thing is when i talk about the guy i have feelings for she kinda shuts down almost? and just does not entertain that part of me, going as far as to "revoking my bisexual card" bc i talk too much about him, and i think shes only halfjoking. to be fair, i barely talk about him anymore, hes just such a cutie patootie >-<i think things got particularly bad when i was at her's last night for a sleepover, with our other best friend (H). we took a few edibles and when they started to kick in my friend legit jumped into my lap and got pretty cuddly, until my legs went numb haha. i got up and sat next to H for a while bc we were doing slideshows (mine was getting them to rate my kpop biases lol)and when we were done H and I were both greening out, like bad, i was getting anxious, legit thought i was in another dimension and like lucid dreaming or some shit, and H and i ended up just going out cold clinging to eachother (i went home and slept 26 hours straight, no exxageration 😭) and when we finally woke up bsf1 seemed kinda off :(idk what to do or if i should really say anything bc she's an emotional person and i really don't want to ruin our friendship or hurt her :/// any advice? if not its okay bc i also just needed to vent so tysm for hearing me out <33 hows life going for you? anything bringing a more than normal amount of happiness?

It definitely does seem like she might have feelings for you. And I think talking it out would be the best bet but more so go about in just asking how she's feeling in general because there could also be another factor in her behavior toward you and really try to listen to and understand her feelings and go from there. I myself I had a crush on a friend in highschool and I'm super dismissive and wishy washy about my crushes and she knew that and just said it'll pass and hugged me which is true it did pass. So try to remember how she handles crushes and use that as a guide to navigate how you go about talking about it. That's the best advice I have I just noticed with friends it's always tricky but it's always the best to have a conversation I really hope that was of some help. And I'm doing fine, I've been talking to a boy, he's very cute and very sweet and I'm trying to not get my hopes up but I might be seeing him soon I hope.

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psychoticwillgraham · 10 months

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putting this kink discussion post under a read more bc im kinda embarrassed about it

TW: talk of sexual gore

gonna out myself as more of a freak with this post: anyone else got a super niche, and I mean super niche, kink that they can’t find jack shit for? bc im making my own weird ass au (for u already know what ship) just so I can even make content for it.

ok, so y’all know that episode of billy and mandy where the brain eating rock alien literally eats brains by using its tentacles through the ear? yeah. uh. that’s my most niche kink, all thanks to that show. that specific episode gave me horrible nightmares as a kid, but when I rewatched it a few years ago, i realized that it was uh. really hot 😬 like the concept of someone not being able to think for themselves and having the monster/eldtrich being make them do whatever they want the person to do and they just have to take it? and they clearly enjoy it? yeah 👀

that kinda goes with my hive mind kink where characters have this done and are at the complete mercy of the monster (but it HAS to be consensual in the first place, so its like a mutual satisfaction thing), and unable to stop it, basically being a glorified fucktoy 👀👀 OH and they control the person’s thoughts so literally, head empty no thoughts.

so im doing an au (that’ll be posted on my whump blog first before I even think about putting it on ao3 bc it’s gonna probably be the weirdest hannigram fic on there and the most extreme, but I might as well let my freak flag fly) where will is cursed with immortality and I mean true immortality where he can’t die as long as there’s at least a piece of his body left, so to truly die, the heat death of the universe would have to happen, yeah lmao

and then you have hannibal, who’s the last of his eldtrich kind and needs to find a suitable vessel to carry his young (yes will is a trans man in this au just bc I want him to be), so he finds out about Will and sets off on trying to court him. he realizes pretty quickly that Will’s Different, and decides to test that theory by straight up stabbing him through the heart with a hardened tentacle (or w/e idk yet), therefore revealing himself. they get to know each other and obviously Will isn’t gonna out hannibal, so they begin a highly fucked up, very messy (gore wise) sexual relationship.

now when I mean gory, I mean gory. bc if you can’t die no matter what and have a kink for said gore, and ur boyfriend is an eldtrich abomination who’s a cannibalistic serial killer, wouldn’t you take advantage of that and constantly die during sex in the most fucked up and nasty ways? i mean I would, but I’m just a nasty freak. and the aforementioned kink in the beginning of this post is a thing in this as well. so the au is just an excuse for me to write creative gory sex scenes and see how nasty I can get. honestly I probably won’t even post certain parts of it unless a few people want me to.

i rlly think that this might be the limit for a lot of the fandom fic wise so I’m prepared to get shit for it. that’s why it’s going on my secret (only if I don’t give u the link) whump blog. so yeah that’s that.

#ash’s fic ideas #outing myself as a nasty ass freak with this post w/e

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nedflix-n-chill · 2 years

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31 Days of Halloween #2 The Munsters (2022) Idk. It's 2022, we've lived through a plague, the dumbest reality TV show host turned wannabe fascist started a cult, and I have a calculus test on Thursday so honestly if Rob Zombie wanted to fuck the corpse of an IP no one has touched in a decade why should I get in his deadlocked way. When that trailer dropped you would have thought Mr Zombie assaulted some of your mothers. I mean yeah it looked dumb as fuck and now that I've seen it I can confirm it's dumb as fuck but like so what. Rob Zombie's The Munsters is a stupid, dumb, campy, goofy, silly, love letter to a sitcom that was, frankly, stupid, dumb, campy, goofy, and silly. It's still not good but like. I can't be mad at it. I guess it's a children's film cuz no one says "cocksucker" in it, so maybe I shouldn't judge it harshly but we also live in a world where these so called "children's" movies from Pixar and Ghibli can reduce a grown person to tears in the first 15 minutes. There's no real 3 act structure. Anything that comes up is delt with and we move onto to the next thing immediately. It feels like 4 eps of a TV show mashed together. None of the characters feel like real characters more like over the top impressions you'd see in a SNL bit. The Transylvania set is pretty dope in a "cable access Saturday night horror host" kinda way though I feel like the best part of the the movie and what feels like true The Munsters humor is when they finally arrive at 1313 Mockingbird Lane. This section of the movie has the closest thing to what we can describe as "jokes that work" but it's also like the last 20 minutes of the movie and the "fish out of water" premise was done A LOT better in the Addams Family adaptation. I'd also call the runtime "self indulgent" but its an adaptation of Zombie's favorite sitcom starring his wife and friends, the runtime is the least self indulgent thing about it. But again, children's movie... I think. I'm not a child just emotionally so. It's pretty dumb and goofy but so are kids, they like eat paste and shit. But maybe a spooky entry point into the horror genre for kids ain't ever a bad thing. https://www.instagram.com/p/CjOUnhxJys4/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

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black-coffee-and-sugar · 3 years

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6x13: The Gauntlet

Two enjoyable episodes back-to-back? I'm shook! Obviously 6x13 lacks the serious messaging and emotional weight of last week's episode but the silliness of it was actually entertaining. My thoughts:

- opening scene is a supercorp hug. christ y'all need to warn people! i was not ready. the way kara's face lit up when she saw lena, the way lena smiled back at her. the way they hugged fully pressed. my heart is full.

- kara n lena immediately whisking away to the fortress right after that for some alone time. i love where your head is at kara 😏

- look at dansen being all cute and shit! who gave them the right honestly?

- glad they continued with kelly still processing the stuff from last episode. and alex is really trying to do better. dansen is the example to follow when it comes to healthy adult relationships. i really didn't think this show was capable.

- it's getting harder and harder to like andrea

- i actually forgot willy was shot last season. and they worked through his trauma off screen. what was the point of showing him getting a blast of courage if we weren't going to see him face his fears and shit. y'all really don't like deep topics huh.

- andrea: where's the journalist i hired?

apparently crisis changed him from a stalkery dickhead to the nice baking guy he is now. sorry girl. valid question tho

- can i just say that everyone was looking exceptionally hot in this episode? like lena, kelly and nxyly in particular jesus help me.

- i haven't enjoyed j'onn this much in so long. he was hilarious. letting that mad scientist lady plummel him in the chest, saying "hold that thought", not moving away from the dragon fire.

- brainy possessed by veeta you could tell jesse was told to just have fun with it

- also did this kryptonian witch just say 'ya mon'?

- lena looking all smol and shit with her little white sneakers and soft clothes and her waterfall hair. kara! kiss this woman already!

- kara in the suit talking privately with lena. honestly never thought i'd see the day

- kara: you really don't believe in magic?

lena: i believe in you

NO ONE TOUCH ME!!!

- this seriously tho this is such a true statement. they both have believed in each other from minute one, when they had no reason to. and yea lena tried to hate kara for a little while but even then, she never stopped believing in kara's compassion and optimism and kara never stopped believing in lena's goodness and brilliance. just say the words 'i love you' explicitly please.

- interesting that kara's test of courage takes place during her rescuing alex's plane and not idk...all the times she was too scared to tell lena. she thinks it's that one random dude she didn't save and not the times with lena (something she admits terrified her). the only thing i can think of for this moment they chose is because yes kara embraced her powers that night but she didn't step out into the public eye as herself, as the last daughter of krypton. she wasn't vulnerable in that respect. because she was scared to be discovered. because she grew up with that fear and need to fit in (she talks about that in later S1). but i will only accept this IF the show ends with kara stepping out into the world fully and no longer having to hide or deny parts of herself. but i also don't see how you make the courage test about telling lena and not have that end with kara admitting she's in love with her so. that might be why.

- nxyly's courage test was actually very sad. i feel for her truly it's not fair what happened. but her being vulnerable about her feelings is interesting because kara still hasn't learned how to do that

- lena having some convenient device to contain the totem just cuz kara needs it. we love handy and resourceful girlfriends

- what was the point of having lena at the museum if she wasn't gonna be affected? y'all copped out!

- that device that was harnessing lightning also somehow made lightning? is that how it works?

- i ASCENDED when i saw alex and lena being the only ones at kara's bedside. like straight out of fanfiction wtf. how many more times are they going to establish that the two most important people in kara's life is alex (her sister and ride or die) and lena (her best friend and perfect partner). how many times before you make this shit canon?!?!

- 'a reluctant earth witch' it's a very interesting way to pronounce lena luthor

- but also, y'all are telling me that a human witch can tap into imp magic? reality warping magic? all-powerful magic? fuck, lena is really on her way to becoming the most powerful being on the planet

- kelly showing up because lena called. im gonna go ahead and assume this indicates that lena and kelly have also spoken about lena ignoring her message. and that they had a meaningful discussion about it and what happened at the ormfell. because as much as i love lena, she deserved to be dragged just as much (if not more) as the superfriends.

- kelly shielding alex was a good visual. kinda stupid but nice.

- dansen couch scene i stopped breathing cuz i swore kelly was about to propose. i love them so much

- supercorp couch scene is where i died because it came at me without warning. kara sans glasses in her civilian clothes. not performing as kara danvers or supergirl. here she's just kara, an alien refugee chilling with her best friend. which is all she ever wanted and she deserves it!

- kara handing lena her plate. stop it!

- but also lena is in the same clothes all episode. which means they left the tower together. and headed straight to kara's apartment. lena definitely slept over in kara's pjs. I'M NOT OKAY!

- this is the first couch scene we got since alex n kara in 6x08. where Kara admits she doesn't want to be alone anymore. and now she isn't because lena is back. god i actually can't.

- kara's face when lena tells her about being a witch. she's so smitten! they're in love your honour

- lena saying that kara is the epitome of courageous with such seriousness and intensity. even though kara tries to brush it off cuz she can't really agree right now, lena means it 100%

- lena's sad face when kara wanted to stay connected to nxyly even though she could get hurt. worried wife energy we love to see it

- poor nxyly must be confused asf

- but also it's canon that kara feels hopeful and happy around lena and no one can take that from me. and it's not just words. kara's behavior is different, she's smiling more, she's opening up. acting choices melissa explain yourself!

not bad at all. we were fed lots of supercorp after months of nothing. they better keep up this momentum. it was lighter episode in terms of emotions and what have you compare to pervious ones. seems like the season is officially kicking off now that lena is back. probably going to have a totem of the week kinda deal but hopefully they include kelly's storyline with the heights cuz i wanna see the conclusion of that.

#supergirl #supercorp #dansen #kara danvers #lena luthor #kelly olsen #alex danvers #brainy #nia nal #6x13 spoilers

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theunquenchable · 2 years

Text

Suck the marrow out of every moment

18+ content ahead; Minors DNI

Summary: Two friends who are a bit more than friends, doing stuff friends usually don't do in a classroom after school. It gets kinda sad though, oops. And they are both delinquents, double oops

(both characters are 18 and in their last year of HS)

Pairing: none - basically this is f!reader x m!reader. Imagine whoever you want for either part. I tried to balance both the male and female parts out.

Warnings: sexual content, fingering, handjob, very soft tbh, kinda angsty, aftercare (kind of), mentions of violence (nothing graphic), mentions of gang activity (again, nothing graphic), swearing, tell me if I missed something

A/N: This is the first smut I have ever written and serves more as a test of sorts. My virgin ass has no idea of the true workings of either a pp or vagg, oop. So yeah, hopefully my years of reading smut have done at least something to kinda make this believable? Idk, enjoy. I feel kinda embarrassed because this is also the first fic I publish on here.

I wrote this with two characters of my story in mind, but no physical descriptions are mentioned (other than... yk, the stuff that you mention in a m!xf! smut). The beginning is kinda stale and feels a bit clinical to read, but about halfway through I kinda got into it a bit better, so yeah. have fun reading, I guess ^^

It's 4am rn and I'm going to just post this shit, sorry if it sucks

Wordcount: ~2,3k words (how tf did that happen)

His hands grasped the back of her thighs as he hoisted her up on the table, lips never leaving hers. Small and quiet grunts left their throats, although both were very much alone right now, the shame of giving into their desire in such a public place was too much for either to handle.

Her hands grasped the front of his shirt before slowly wandering up his throat and gliding to his neck. Her nails scraped over his skin and went into his hair, while his hands slid up her thighs under her skirt, slowly taking the fabric with him. One hand deviated and went to the front of her shirt, popping open the buttons one after the other. The hand under her skirt reached its destination on her hipbone and slipped under the material of her soft underwear.

She disconnected from the hot and heavy kiss and gasped at the foreign yet familiar feeling. Her eyes found his scorching ones, both half lidded eyes staring at one another as his hand slowly wandered inwards, still under the band of her panties. Her hips bucked softly at the ticklish yet arousing feeling and a hiss escaped her lips. With shaky hands she reached to his shirt again and slowly unbuttoned it with an unspoken anticipation wavering through the air.

“A-ah,-” her voice cut itself off when she called him with a soft moan as his other hand, nearly forgotten, palmed at her bra clad chest, the surprise more the reason for the sound than the actual stimulation. “Mmh.....” he now moaned her name as the girl leaned forward and latched her lips onto his throat after finally having opened his shirt fully. The wavy material revealed his slightly sweaty chest to the cool air of the classroom and he automatically drew closer to the girl before him.

With a shaky breath the boy decided to tease the girl for her relentless biting, licking and sucking on his pulse. It made his pants strain uncomfortably and he only wanted to return the favor. His hand under her skirt ghosted over her clothed clit and entrance and the girl flinched, gasping audibly into his neck. He could feel her breath on his sensitive skin and only closed his eyes to revel in the sweet feeling. His other hand pulled her bra over her chest completely, freeing her breasts. She let out a relieved breath, before it became stuck in her chest suddenly as he slipped his hand under the skirt into her panties and circled her clit.

“God--” she gasped and began to claw at his back. Her legs circled around his hips and drew him closer with power. Due to him not expecting so much strength behind her legs that yearned to circle around him, he was forced forward suddenly. He lost his grasp on her core with a yelp and crashed into her, his clothed crotch crashing into hers. Both let out a surprised yet pleased gasp and sigh.

“Stop teasing me.” She breathed into his ear while embracing him. His spine began to tingle at her dominating tone and a small grin found his face. However, his pleased expression was wiped away rather quickly when the girl rolled her hips into his slowly but deeply. Now he was the one to moan, his pitch raising as she trailed her fingers over his stiff nipples.

He whined out her nickname when she rolled again, and she let out a small moan of her own at his usage off her gang title. She was his boss after all.

“Touch me.” she breathed out and the boy obliged, diving one hand back into her panties. His hand strained the material of her underwear as his pointer and middle finger began to harshly assault her clit. Her back instantly arched at the stimulation and she groaned with a mixture of relief and pleasure. Her naked chest pressed into his and he used the closeness to press his lips to her's again. His lips and tongue swallowed every groan, whine and moan the girl let slip from her throat. His free hand then wandered to her chest and began to toy with the soft mounds, at first palming them firmly but soon concentrating on tugging and flicking at her perky nipples, similarly to what she had been doing.

With heaving chests the two drew apart and the boy took his fingers away from her core. The girl whined from the sudden lost contact but soon stopped as she watched him raise the two fingers that had previously been on her most sensitive part to his lips. His mouth enveloped the two digits and made the girl shiver in hot anticipation and need. She could practically feel herself drip onto the desk.

“You taste... really good.” he muttered with a slight embarrassed tilt to his voice, he already regretted saying something so naughty. Before the boy could ponder on the thought and his emotions longer, the girl had enough of sitting quiet and passive. Her hands started working on the zipper of his pants, delight spreading over her face when she saw the bulge forming. The boy, as much as he enjoyed the girl making her way to his cock, quickly went back under her skirt with his hand and began his work anew. Now his thumb was on her clit, rubbing it harshly, just how she liked it, and middle and pointer finger teasingly rubbed along her entrance, preparing to intrude any moment. With a grin he noticed the hands opening his pants twitch at the stimuli.

However, just like before his grin was wiped clean off his face as she grabbed down the now opened pants and roughly drew his cock from within his boxers. He moaned delighted when the air hit his stiff and with precum glistening dick. She drew his pants down until they finally slid to the floor completely and tugged his underwear down until his balls rested on the waistband.

“F-fuck..” he groaned out and nearly forgot his task of pleasing her. “Let's do it together.” she whispered out and licked her hand slowly, making him groan and cock twitch. She grasped his cock in one hand and cradled his balls in the other, the simple contact stimulated him enough to the point where he didn't trust himself not to moan instantly, so he only nodded. As soon as she dragged her wet hand up to his cock head, his fingers delved into her walls and both groaned simultaneously.

Her legs around his hips drew him impossibly close and soon the only thing separating her pussy from his cock was the thin skirt and their hands. Her head fell to his shoulder as she began to roll her hips forward, soft gasps, groans and moans escaping her lips. The pace her hand was going up and down his cock with was matching the pace his finger went in and out of her. When his thumb would roll over her swollen clit at a particularly odd angle, she would shudder into his chest which delighted him to no end and she felt it by the way his dick would twitch slightly.

He was no different than her, his gaze was turned towards the big windows of the classroom as the sun went down behind the many buildings in the distance. Her soft breaths and slow shivers mixed with the sweet sounds she made were his cryptonite, he would love to have a recording of it for when he needed to get off in the future. They couldn't do this often after all.

The reminder was sobering. With her hands pumping his cock and massaging his balls, and him fingering her in earnest, it should be the last thing on his mind... But he couldn't help himself. She was the unlikely leader of their school filled with delinquents and he was her most trusted henchman, her right hand, her sword.

His fingers that usually broke noses and fingers were buried deeply in her folds, her wetness dripping down his knuckles that were unbelievably bruised and scratched. The knuckles she kissed softly when they were alone. Their relationship was secret and for good reason, it would only cause trouble for people to know, and the hidden nature only added excitement to this strange bond they had. They would graduate next year anyways, so it would either be over or-

“Stop... thinking.” her breathy voice snapped him out of his stupor and only now did he notice the tight hot feeling coiling in him, he was about to cum “Stay here with... me.” she added as she kissed the side of his throat. He gasped out shakily and apologized for zoning out.

She noticed his fingers movement becoming sloppy and instantly knew that he was somewhere else again. His thoughts were not foreign to her but the outcome was the same every time. Their relationship, as tragic as it was, was all they could afford and she would suck the marrow out of every moment she got with him.

Her hand quickened suddenly as she felt his balls tightening in her palm. In return, she felt his form spasm softly and his thumb and fingers changed their angle and sped up significantly. Both moaned and began to openly thrust into each other.

That is all they could do, no risks and yet all the risk at the same time. Lonely nights with each other on the phone, small “toilette breaks” in between lessons sharing a stall, or meet-ups like those after school. That is how far they could go.

A grim future filled with gang business and violence was promised to her, it was a given after her deeds in high school. His didn't look different. He was a perfect addition to the eyes of local gang leaders, and his reputation wouldn't let him go anywhere else. They were both doomed.

“I am close!” he warned tightly, his teeth gritted as his loud gasps and moans became higher and faster, she followed him suit. The hot coil in her stomach was shivering up her whole body, her arms and legs were tingling and she awaited the tight embrace of her orgasm with open arms.

“Kiss me!” she ordered tightly and the boy complied breathlessly, pressing his open mouth to hers. It was a messy dance of tongues as there was zero space between their bodies anymore. She listened to his whines that she swallowed eagerly and now pumped him as fast as she could manage in the confined space between their bodies. He felt her walls tighten around his fingers and quickly pulled out his fingers to roughly rub the pads of his fingers again her clit and entrance quickly, her moans skyrocketed instantly and her body began to convulse against his own.

The arm that was previously on steadying him against her was now slung around her waist so she wouldn't fall off the table.

Her release overcame her with a high pitched cry that broke their kiss apart. He remained rubbing, even when he felt his own release shoot out of him with a loud relieved groan. Shivering, both remained slowly stimulating the other through the other's orgasm.

She tilted her head back while heavy breaths escaped her, her naked, heaving chest glistening with sweat. Her orgasm was always more devastating than his, so he took it upon himself to clean up the crime scene. He slowly pealed himself off of her form and looked at her “Can you sit straight, or...?”

“Yeah, I'm fine. I have tissues in my bag...” she breathed out heavily while leaning back. His cum was dripping down her belly and hand. He nodded in understanding and tugged his cock back into his pants, before grabbing her bag and rummaging through her belongings to find the tissues. He found just that and went over to clean her up.

“I can do that myself, you know?” she laughed softly as he carefully cleaned her front with the small tissues. It was almost funny how this usually violent and frightening boy was carefully swiping down her breasts as if she would break if he was too harsh.

“It's my cum, isn't it? And you look like you will topple over any moment.” he muttered with an undertone of worry. She shook her head with a smile and watched him closely “I mean, yeah, I am tired as hell, I could fall asleep right here. How are you never that spent, it's unfair.” he chuckled when he saw her small faux pout and now he was the one shaking his head. After he finished with cleaning her, her swiped down his own hands and through away the stained tissues into the trash bin.

“I just have better endurance.” he answered as he came back to her side. She rolled her eyes and pulled down her bra over her chest again. They both began to button up their shirts in a comfortable silence. After they remained still for a few moments, before the boy sighed.

“We should get going, the janitor will roll through here soon.” he stretched his arms out with a groan and she nodded in agreement, that kind of situation would not only be absolutely embarrassing, it would bring a huge bucket full of trouble with it.

When she slid down the desk her legs wobbled instantly and she only caught herself barely on the edge of the table. “This is bullshit...” she cursed quietly as she steadied herself. He came up next to her with both their school bags slung over his shoulders and slowly began to stroke her spine teasingly “Want me to carry you?” he asked softly and although his tone was teasing, he was serious. It wouldn't be the first time either.

The girl sighed but nodded anyways.

The two left the school building shortly after, she on his back, chin resting on his shoulder tiredly.

“You can sleep if you wanna.” he stated nonchalantly and the girl did not protest.

This was what they had and every moment the two shared counted. They would suck the marrow out of every breath they shared. It was a sad truth, and yet: while they were sad it would soon end, they were still happy it happened.

(This ending is really rushed because like I said it's 4am and I am tired as shit, I am so sorry)

#smut #vanilla #x reader #reader x reader #idk what tags to use #fluff #fanfic #first smut don't hurt me #male reader #female reader

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astheroid · 3 years

Text

Ka-Kacchan 😫💦 (Bakugouwu x reader SMUT 🤯)

Author-chan here!!!!!! I decided to write for my bb Kacchan bc hes just such a cutie >.< hehe anyways ENJOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I walked into the hero association with my long Blonde hair flowing in the wind. “SARAH!!” Deku called, walking over to me. “Baka-Deku, what do you wabt?” I asked, making a cute face. “I heard Kacchan wants youuuuu” he said raising his green puffy eyebrows. “Ka-Kacchan?? Why.. why would he ever want me?” I asked, batting my bright blue eyes in his directuon. “I do not know Sara-chan” he answered, blushing bright red. “I think… he might have a crush on you” I GASPED!! (author’s note: UwU OMGGG IT’S GETTING ~SPICYYYY~) I smiled sweetly at deku before hopping over to Bakugou, flipping my hair over m shoulder. “Ohio K-Kacchan, what do you want?” I said, trying to be tough. He glared at me pomeranian hair sticking up as I touched him. “NOTHING YOU BITCH!!” He yelled, shoving me. I started crying. “BAKA-KUGOU WHY DID YOU DO THAT????” I yelled. He lookd at me. “Idk you’re just ugly.” He said and walked away. I touched my frail wrist and realized it was broken. I went to the doctor’s and got it fixed, mad at Kacchan te whole way. I saw Kacchan after work and went to be mad at him. “WHY DID YOU DO THAT?????” I screamed activating my Ice Quirk. “You’RE JUST AN UGLY STUPID EXTRA!!” Ye glared at me, hands booming. “IF I’M SO UGLU WHY DO YOU LIKE MEEEE?????/?” I yelled in his face. He gasped and tears fell from his eyes. “BAKAaAaAaAAAA HOW DO U KNOW THAT?” He said. “I know because your always mean to me :(“ I pouted. He said “t-th-that’s not t-true BAKA-SARAAH.” I grinned menacingly with my fangs. “Of course it’s true Ba-kacchan” “Don’t call me that” he said, blushing. “Ba-kacchan” I said again, my own cheeks getting red against my pale skin. He grabbed my arm “let’s go to my house and see if you wan’t to call me that again Baka-Sarah-chan”. (author’s note: OMGGGGGGG SMUT COMING SOON!!! TANK U FOR READING THIS FAR!!! Should I make a Deku-chan one next? He’s my lil beann and I wanna write 4 him :3)

UwU SMUTTTTTTTTTT BWLOE THE CUT!!!! Skip if you want but its my favorit part ;3

We arrived at his house and no-one was home, it was just me and Kacchan (author’s note: SPICYYYYYY whatr you gonna do bakacchan O///O). He threw me on his bed and took off his shirt (author’s note: MMM HIS STOMACH I’M DROOLING ;w;). He pushed me down and went to the bathroom, when he came out he had no pants too!! I was surprised by his cream stick poking through his underwear. “Take off ur clothes baka” he huffed face very red. I pouted. “Make me Ba-Kacchan”. He growled ferally nd ripped mt clothes off my body. I gasped, pale Skin getting goosebumps. “There I made you” he said rolling his eyes. I blushed very hard. “Now let me show u what happens when you call me Ba-kacchan >:(“ (autho’rs note: *w* OMGOMGOMGOMG IT’S HAPPENING GUYSSS!! YOUR AUTHOR-CHAN IS SOOOO EXCITED!!!). He took off his Dog undies and I saw… A HUGE DING-DONG!!! He put it inside me and moved quickly. I moaned “OoOoOoOoOoOoOoHhHhHhHHHH Ka-Kacchan… go faster!!” He went faster, grumbling my name. After a bit he took his member out and Spat on me. “That’s why u don’t call me Ba-Kacchan Bitch”. I layed on his bed amd panted; legs too weak to stand up. He put his pants over his meat scepter and grinned at me. “I hope you learned your lesson Baka-Sarah”.

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Smut done :(((( Stay to read the rest tho!!!

I stayed in his house for 30 minutes before leaveing. “B-bye k-k-Kacchan” I stuttered. My legs were still wobbly. I went home and jumped on my bed dreaming of Kacchan railing me again ;). When I woke up I felt really sick and threw up in the bathroom. ‘Oh no……’ I thought. WAS I PREGANTE????? (author’s note: OOHHHHHHHHHHH DRAAAMAAAAA!!! Hehe it gets so exciting) I rushed to the store to buy a test, completely forgetting about my job as a Hero. I gasped at the test. ‘I’m… Perngant??’ I touched my belly. ‘I have Ba-kacchan’s baby in here…” ‘I have to call him’. I called and talked to him on the phone. “K-Kacchan” I stuttered “I got pragnent!” He gasped. “F*ck. Are u gonna keep it?” I gasped. “OF COURSE!!!!! I CAN”T KILL OUR BABY!!!!!!!!!” (author’s note: OMGEEEE THEY’RE FIGHTING 🥺🥺🥺) Kacchan sobbed. “I DON’T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO PAY FOR A KID!!” “YOU DON’T NEED TO, I CAN!!!! I DOUN’T NEED YOU ANYWAYS!!!!” I screamed, crying too. He left the call and I cried harder. Idk what to do with a BABY. He came to my house. He crossed his arms madly. “We need to kill the baby.” “NO I CAN’T DO THAT!!” I screamed (author’s note: OoOoOoOoOh THEY’RE GOING THRU IT!!!!!). “Why not????????” He pouted. His hands sparked. “THAT’S MURDER BA-KACCHAN!!!” My long Silky hair whipped around as I yelled up at him. He tried to hit my stomach, but I dodged and Froze him in placee. “DON’T HIT ME BAKA-KUGOU!!!!!!!!” I screamed. “STOP TYRING TO MURDER O U R CHILD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” He huffed. “I DON’T WANT A STUPID KID WITH A WHORE LIKE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!” I gasped loudly. “I’M NOT A WHORE YOU’RE JUST A JERK!!!!!” He burst out of the ice and kissed me. “I don’t want a crusty crotch goblin to ruin our relationship” “He won’t I promise” I said blushing Red and patting my tummy. He sighed loudly. “Ok fine we can keep the cum droplet I just don’t wanna pay” I smiled “OK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” “So……. will you marry me?” I gasped suuuper loud “OF COURSE BAKUGOU!!!!! I LOVE U!!!”

TIMESKIP!!!!!!!! UwU I loveeee this story so far; hope u guys like it too ;3

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We ended up having 8 babys. I’m the #1 hero (author’s note: Deku is too baby to be a hero 🥺 I think Strong reader-chan is better for that >:3) and Kacchan is my sidekick. Our kids have the strongst quirks in the world!!!1!!! Ray Andy Mei Akira Bobby David & Deku Jr have explosion-Ice quirks, but Maya (author’s note: Maya is my faaavoriteeee UvU) has A SUPER POWERFUL ICE QUIRK (just like her mama)!!!!!! We lived a very happy nice life after that and had a ton of money!!

BONUS SMUT!!!!!!!!!!!! Hehe I wanted to do a lil extra ~spicy~ something as a reward for reading this far >wO

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Kacchan plugged me up with his thicc Pleasure Pump. I whined “KA-KACCHAN YOU’RE TOO BIG~” He didn’t listen and kept going pounding me into the wall. There was a collar around my neck (author’s note: K!NKYYYYYY~~~~~) and my Face was mushd into the wall. He kept going for quite some time until he hit something in me. I scREAMED “OOOOHHHHHH KACCHAN THAT’S ITtTtTTTTttttTTTT~~~” he grunted and pushed harder. His manhood felt so GOOOOOOD. (author’s note: I kinda want Bakugouwu to @#!% me if u know what i mean ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)) He did it until he Cummed; taking it out so we wouldn’t have more babys.

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HEHEHEHEHEHHEHHEEEE THAT WAS SO HOT *w*. ANYWAYSSS HERE’S AN AUTHOR-CHAN QnA!!!!!!!

Favorite food: BAKUGOU UwU

Favorite character: BBY DEKU!!!! He’s MINE get away Broke Uraraka >:((((

Favorite color: Anything but pink :/ soooo cringy

Favorite Anime: MY HERO OBV!!!

Ships: Me x my hero boysss 🤤 the girls are all dumb and gay is sin :^/

Next chapter????:

NEXT CHAPTER PREVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Deku stared at us jelously. “I-I don’t understand… I…. I really like you Sarah-Chan!!! Why did u have to choose Kacchan 🥺” I looked at him sadly. “He got me pregnent Deku-chan I had toooo” He looked at Bakugou mad. “You took my crush away from me Kacchan…….” Kacchan yelled at him “SHE’S MINE SO BACK OFF BAKA-DEKUUUUU!!!!!!!!” Deku started cryeing and looked at me for help “She was supposed to be MY wife Mean Kacchan :(“ Bakugou laughed. “NO CHANCE LOSER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

The next chapter will be coming out sooooon :D I hope you guys liked!!!!! It’s gonna be so good and even a little smutty *o* n e wAys, catch all you lil reader-chan beans l8ter!!!

Last updated: April 1, 2016

[This is 100% a joke and not a real representation of my writing skills. Happy April Fools ;D]

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sylvielauffeydottir · 3 years

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Hi I just saw your post about Israel and Palestinian. I don't know if you're the person to ask or if this is a dumb question but I was wondering if anyone has considered starting a second Jewish state? I was wondering because there's a bunch of Christian countries so why not multiple Jewish ones.

Sorry if I'm bothering you and Thanks for your time.

That’s actually a pretty interesting question. I am going to apologize right now, because I essentially can’t give a short answer to save my life.

I’m not a ‘Jewish Scholar,’ so while I can speak with some authority about the history of Zionism, I definitely couldn’t speak about it with as much authority as others. I mentioned in at least one of the posts I have written about the history of plans for a ‘Jewish state’ when Zionism was originally being proposed, and I can kinda of track the history of Zionist thinking for you if you are interested, though essentially it’s just about arguing where to go. But there are better scholars for this than me, so I would recommend Rebecca Kobrin, Deborah Lipstadt, Walter Laqueur … idk. Maybe just read some Theodor Herzl, honestly. With all of that said, I can speak with some authority about the post-war history of this in the Middle East. So let’s go.

In post-war times, there has really only been one serious discussion of an alternative Jewish state, as far as I know. And actually, this is part of why I find it so ironic that people are campaigning so hard to be “anti-Zionist” and to express views like “anti-Zionism” in their activism, because the Jews in Israel who are most anti-Zionist are actually the settlers of Palestinian territories, who want to secede and form a “Gaza-State” called Judeah. There's a great book about this called The Deadly Embrace by Ilana Kass And Bard O'Neill, if anyone is interested. Anyway, most of those people, who are largely Haredim (the Ultra-Orthodox Jews, though some of those settlers are semi Orthodox), have essentially been waging a “culture war” about what it means to have a Jewish state and what the identity of that Jewish state should look like basically since the 1980s.

There is a really good article about this that you can find right here written by Peter Lintl, who is a researcher at the Institution of Political Science for the Friedrich-Alexander Universitat. I’ll summarize it for the lazy people, though, because it’s like 40 pages. Just know that this paragraph won’t be super source heavy, because it is basically the same source. Essentially, the Haredim community has tripled in size from 4% to 12% of the total Israeli population since 1980, and it is probably going to be about 20% by 2040. They only accept the Torah and religious laws as the basis for Jewish life and Jewish identity and they are critical of democratic principles. To them, a societal structure should be hierarchical, patriarchal, and have rabbis at the apex, and they basically believe that Israel isn’t a legitimate state. This is primarily because Israel is (at least technically, so no one come at me in the comments about Palestinian citizens of Israel, so I’ll make a little ** and address this there) a ‘liberal’ democracy. Rights of Israeli citizens include, according to Freedom House, free and fair elections (they rank higher on that criteria here than the United States, by the way), political choice, political rights and electoral opportunities for women, a free and independent media, and academic freedom. It is also, I should add (as a lesbian), the only country in the Middle East that has anything close to LGBT+ rights.

[**to the point about Palestinians and Palestinian citizens of Israel: I have a few things to say. First, I have recommended this book twice now and it is Michael Oren’s Six Days of War, which absolutely fantastically talks about the ways in which the entire structure of the Palestinian ‘citizenship’ movement, Palestinian rights, and who was responsible for governing Palestinians changed after the Six Days War. If you are at all interested in the modern Middle East or modern Middle East politics, I highly recommend you read this, because a huge tenant of this book is that it was 1967, not 1947, that caused huge parts of our current situation (and that, surprisingly, a huge issue that quote-on-quote “started it” was actually water, but that’s sort of the primary secondary issue, not the Actual Issue at play here). Anyway, I’ve talked about the fact that Israel hugely abuses its authority in the West Bank and Gaza and that there are going to be current members of the Israeli Government who face action at the ICC, so please don’t litigate this again with me. I also should add that the 2018 law which said it was only Jews who had the natural-born right to “self-determine” in Israel was passed by the Lekkud Government, and I really hate them anyway. I know they’re bad. It’s not the point I’m making. I’m making a broader point about the Constitution vis-a-vis what the Haredim are proposing, which is way worse].

To get back to the Haredim, basically there is this entire movement of actual settlers in territories that have been determined to belong to the Palestinian people as of, you know, the modern founding of Israel (and not the pre-Israel ‘colonial settler’ narrative you’ll see on instagram in direct conflict with the history of centuries of aliyah) who want to secede and form a separate Jewish state. They aren’t like, the only settlers, but I point this out because they are basically ‘anti-Zionist’ in the sense that they think that modern Zionism isn’t adhering to the laws of Judaism — that the state of Israel is too free, too radical, too open. And scarily enough, these are the sort of the people from whom Netanyahu draws a huge part of his political support. Which is true of the right wing in general. Netanyahu can’t actually govern without a coalition government. Like I have said, the Knesset is huge, often with 11-13 political parties at once, and so to ‘govern’ Netanyahu often needs to recruit increasingly right wing, conservative, basically insane political parties to maintain his coalition. It’s why he has been so supportive of the settlements, particularly in the last five years (since he is, as I have also said, facing corruption charges, and he really can’t leave office). It would really suck for him if a huge chunk of his voters seceded, wouldn’t it?

Anyway, that is the only ‘second Jewish State’ I know about, and I don’t think that is necessarily much of a solution. I really don’t have the solutions to the Middle East crisis. I am just a girl with some history degrees and some time on her hands to devote to tumblr, and I want people to learn more so they can form their own opinions. With that said, I think there are two more things worth saying and then I will close out for the night.

First, Judaism is an ethno-religion. Our ethnicities have become mixed with the places that we have inhabited over the years in diaspora, which is how you have gotten Sephardi, Mizrahi, Ashkenazi, and even Ethiopian Jews. But if you do actual DNA testing on almost all of the Jews in diaspora, the testing shows that we come from the same place: the Levant. No matter how pale or dark, Jews are still fundamentally one people, something we should never forget (and anyone who tries to put racial hierarchy into paleness of Jews: legit, screw you. One people). Anyway, unlike other religious communities, we have an indigenous homeland because we have an ethnic homeland. It’s small, and there are many Jews in diaspora who choose not to return to it, like myself. But that homeland is ours (just as much as it is rightfully Palestinians, because we are both indigenous to the region. For everyone who hasn’t read my other posts on the issue, I’m not explaining this again. Just see: one, two, and three, the post that prompted this ask). This is different from Christians, for example, who basically just conquered all of Europe and whose religion is not dependent on your race or background. You can be a lapsed Christian and you are still white, latinx, black, etc right? I am a lapsed Jew, religiously speaking, and will still never escape that I am ethnically Ashkenazi Jewish.

Second, I think you raise a really good point about other religious states. There are many other religious majority states in the world (all of these countries have an official state religion), and a lot of them are committing a lot of atrocities right now (don't even get me started on Saudi Arabia). I have seen other posts and other authors write about this better than I ever could, but I am going to do my best to articulate why, because of this, criticism of Israel as a state, versus criticism of the Israeli Government, is about ... 9 times out of 10 inherently antisemitic.

We should all be able to criticize governments. That is a healthy part of the democratic process and it is a healthy part of being part of the world community. But there are 140 dictatorships in the world, and the UN Human Rights Council has condemned Israel 45 times since 2013. Since the creation of the UN Human Rights Council, it has has received more resolutions concerning Israel than on the rest of the world combined. This is compared to like … 1 for Myanmar, 1 for South Sudan, and 1 for North Korea.

Israel is the world’s only Jewish majority state. You want to talk about “ethnic cleansing” and “repressive governments”? I can give you about five other governments and world situations right now, off the top of my head, that are very stark, very brutal, very (in some cases) simple examples of either or both. If a person is ‘using their platform’ to Israel-bash, but they are not currently speaking about the atrocities in Myanmar, Kashmir, Azerbaijan, South Sudan, or even, dare I say, the ethnonationalism of the Hindu Nationalist Party in India, then, at the very least, their activism is a little bit performative. They are chasing the most recent ‘hot button’ issue they saw in an instagraphic, and they probably want to be woke and maybe want to do the right thing. And no one come at me and say it is because you don’t “know anything about Myanmar.” Most people know next to nothing about the Middle East crisis as well. At best, people are inconsistent, they may be a hypocrite, and, whether they want to admit it to themselves or not, they are either unintentionally or intentionally buying into antisemitic narratives. They might even be an antisemite.

I like to think (hope, maybe) that most people don’t hate Jews. If anything, they just follow what they’ve been told, and they tend to digest what everyone is taking about. But there is a reason this is the global narrative that has gained traction, and I guarantee it has at least something to do with the star on the Israeli flag.

I know that was a very long answer to your question, but I hope that gave you some insight.

As a sidenote: I keep recommending books, so I am going to just put a master list of every book I have ever recommended at the bottom of anything I do now, because the list keeps growing. So, let’s go in author alphabetical order from now on.

One Country by Ali Abunimah Rise and Kill First: The Secret History of Israel's Targeted Assassinations by Ronen Bergman Kingdom of Olives and Ash: Writers Confront the Occupation, edited by Michael Chabon and Ayelet Waldman The Girl Who Stole My Holocaust: A Memoir by Noam Chayut If a Place Can Make You Cry: Dispatches from an Anxious State by Daniel Gordis Israel: A Concise History of a Nation Reborn by Daniel Gordis The Deadly Embrace by Ilana Kass And Bard O'Neill Like Dreamers: The Story of the Israeli Paratroopers Who Reunited Jerusalem and Divided a Nation by Yossi Klein Halevi Antisemitism by Deborah Lipstadt Six Days of War: June 1967 and the Making of the Modern Middle East by Michael Oren The Yom Kippur War: The Epic Encounter That Transformed the Middle East by Abraham Rabinovich One Palestine, Complete: Jews and Arabs Under the British Mandate by Tom Segev Hollow Land: Israel's Architecture of Occupation by Eyal Weizman

#ask #jew tag

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theroguequeenaniki · 3 years

Text

Questions 2009 -> 2021

This is from my Facebook. It popped up on my memories page thing. I originally answered this in 2009 when I was 15, it’s now 2021 & and I am 27, so I’m gonna do it again. Leaving the original answers. Original answers will be italicized. Commentary on the original answers in parentheses & crossed out? Lol. (I’m not gonna tag anyone, but, like, I guess if you want to answer these random questions from Facebook 12 years ago, go ahead lol)

Questions

Can you fill this out without lying? You've been tagged, so now you need to answer all the questions HONESTLY. At the end, choose people to tag. Don't forget to tag me so I can see your answers! To do this, copy this entire message, then go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, delete my answers, and type yours. Easy! Next, tag people that you think may enjoy this (in the right hand corner of the app). Click publish (at the bottom). Have fun! :) 1.What was the last thing you put in your mouth? My cup with my Big Red in it The straw to my Kate Spade tumbler to drink my HEB Cola Lol.

2.Where was your profile picture taken? I got it off the internet. it's a random anime girl. My bedroom. 3.Can you play Guitar Hero? Never played it. Probably wouldn't be good at it. Not to good at video games. But I am good at Mario Cart, both 64 and the Wii. plus I'm good at some Sonic games. Still never played it. Idk if I’m any good at Mario Cart or the Sonic games anymore, I haven’t played either in years lol

4.Name someone who made you laugh today? Doctor Who TikTok. My cats.

5.How late did you stay up last night and why? Umm, probably about 10:00 cause it took me forevor to get into bed. Uh..Past 4am. Lol. B/c my sleep schedule is fucked. I was in bed by 3am though, but I was playing games & watching TikToks on my phone. Lol.

6.If you could move somewhere else, would you? Yes. I'd move to either New York or Sweden. I don’t know. Part of me says yes. But part of me says no..b/c even though Texas has it’s faults (a LOT of them), I cannot imagine living anywhere else long-term..

7. Ever been kissed under fireworks? HAHA. Yeah right. I've never even been kissed! Still nope. I have been kissed though. He just didn’t kiss me under the fireworks the one NYE we spent together...

8. Which of your friends lives closest to you? Um, I think R, but D might also. D is accross Stasney from me and R is a couple blocks down (I don’t talk to these people much anymore & I’m not going to share their names on Tumblr) Uh. I think Maybe Raven? B/c they’re the only one who lives in the same city still. But, Sarah might technically be closer distance wise? Hold on. Ok, yeah, Sarah’s closer, even though she doesn’t live in this city anymore.

9. Do you believe exes can be friends? It all depends on the situation.(I totally stold M's answer but it's true) (I don’t talk to this person anymore & I’m not gonna share their name on Tumblr) I mean, yeah. Two of my best friends are each others exes and they’re still friends. I haven’t stayed friend with my ex, but, uh, he ghosted me so? Lol.

10. How do you feel about Dr. Pepper? I love it. I still love it. Lol.

11. When was the last time you cried really hard? I can't remember. I don't think it was that long ago, I had a light cry on Saturday, but I don't remember the last time I cried really hard. When we got back from our trip in July. Had a full on breakdown that night. Overheated all weekend. Overwhelmed. Anxiety. It was not a very good vacation..I cry a lot though.

12. Who took your profile picture? I got it off of google. I did.

13. Who was the last person you took a picture of? Umm, either myself, or one of my family members. Aside from myself. I think my dad, on his phone, b/c there was a cicada on his shoulder and he wanted to ask the family group chat if he could keep it. Lol. I take a LOT of pictures of cats though. Lol.

14. Was yesterday better than today? Hail yes! To much drama today! And I couldn't avoid it cause I was in the middle of it! (Oof, what drama was 15 yo Linda dealing with that she couldn’t avoid? Lol. I mean, I guess, Sophomore year was a bit full of drama lol) Anyway, I mean, they were pretty much the same. One wasn’t better than the other. One wasn’t worse than the other.

15. Can you live a day without TV? yeah. Now Music there is something I can't live without! Yep, Do it almost everyday. Sentiments about music remain the same. Lol.

16. Are you upset about anything? Yes. I'm annoyed about something and it's making me upset. (I assume this has something to do with the the drama mentioned earlier lol) Always. Anxiety & depression are a bitch. My rooms a mess & I can’t get myself to clean it. My shelves are still a mess.

17. Do you think relationships are ever really worth it? yeah. though i havent really had one yet. I mean, yeah. Even though I haven’t had one last, aside from friendships, but they’re worth it.

18. Are you a bad influence? I hope not. If so, let me know.(again I took M's answer but it's true) Probably. Idk. Lol.

19. Night out or night in? Depends on what's going on and how I feel about it. Night in usually. I do like going out sometimes, but, like, to dinner. Maybe a movie or a show. But, you know, we’ve been in a panini press, the only thing I’ve been comfortable doing is going to dinner (fully vaxxed & masked). But I also prefer staying home anyway. (Like I usually just go to dinner with my family lol)

20. What items could you not go without during the day? my computer. my book. my journal and a pen. My phone. My journal (b/c I write in it every night, as a diary, 14yo Linda wrote stories). Uh. I didn’t take food or drinks into account in the og, so I won’t in those. But, yeah. My phone & journal. I can go a day without my laptop if I need to. (Went the whole trip in July without pulling it out, though maybe that’s not a good example since my anxiety on that trip was so high..) I want to say a book, but I’ve been in a massive reading slump so...I wish I read as much as 15yo Linda did..

21. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital? I don't remember. I think it was myself.(if you want to know, ask me in person) I honestly don’t know. I don’t remember the last time I was in a hospital.

22. What does the last text message in your inbox say? "Mrbobbybones: wish ted would finally meet their mother already. geez. get to it. However, I see myself in that character more and more each episode." yeah. That's what it says. It's from Twitter. (Huh? and I can’t even go check b/c my inbox doesn’t go back to 2009 on Twitter?? (I haven’t had my account that long) Wait wait wait just remembered I used to get tweets to my phone as text messages lol)

Facebook messenger: “ Cool” From our group chat. Lol.

From actual text messages on my phone: “ heeey! Just put up the Tuesday PDS just for you it’s a big one.” From Phillip Defranco’s text line Lol.

23. How do you feel about your life right now? I'm loving and hating it. but hey nobody gets out alive right? Uh..I mean. I’m alive. I have WiFi. Food. Family. I haven’t seen my friends in 2 years. (Minus Alex, b/c they were here in July to cat/house sit, but I saw them for like, one night..) There’s a lot that could be better. A lot that could be worse.

24. Do you hate anyone? yes!!! Oof. I mean, kinda.

25. If we were to look in your Facebook Inbox, what would we find? some random conversations. most of my convos on her though have been in chat or through comments. Facebook Inbox is now Facebook Messenger. So you’ll find all my Facebook Messenger convos. Mostly our group chat. And side group chats for secret planning (birthdays & stuff). Plus other chats? Lol.

26. Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass? I better! (excuse me miss 15yo Linda you absolutely could have passed a drug test you ALSO didn’t drink or smoke or take any drugs lol) Yeah. Absolutely. I don’t drink or smoke or take any drugs so, yeah? Lol.

27. Has anyone ever called you perfect before?

Yes. But I can't remember when... Yeah. Pretty sure.

28. What song is stuck in your head? Gee by SNSD(Girls Generation) They're Korean. A few My Chemical Romance songs

29. Someone knocks on your window at 2:00 a.m., who do you want it to be? EDWARD CULLEN! Joke! lol. No I don't know. If it was Edward, I'd call the cops. whoever it is though better have an explaination or they are gonna get hit in the head with my Book of Shadows. (Maybe I wouldn’t mind Edward at my window though? Lol.) Uh. My friends? Lol. Idk if I want anyone knocking on my window at 2am.

30.Wanna have grandkids before you’re 50? I don't know....... Uh. No? Idk. Most likely not gonna happen.

31. Name something you have to do tomorrow? I can't think of anything right now... Eat. Should probably clean my room.

32. Do you think too much or too little? Way to much! lol. Way way way too much

33. Do you smile a lot? i try to. I think I do. I get told that alot in Theater...

I think so

#questions #throwback #is this a get to know me #idk

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lilypixels · 3 years

Note

...............all of them.....?

It took me an hr to do this....🥲💀

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

Teacupsss

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

Lollipops

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

Uhhh cotton candy

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

Probably quiet and smart lol I did my school work and was friendly with everyone so I was a favorite and heard all the nice things 🙈

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?

I kinda like bottles more but like the glass ones with the caps that could slice your fingers-

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

I’m for all but sports lol

7. earbuds or headphones?

Earbuds

8. movies or tv shows?

Shows cause I’m the type to watch an hr long episode vs hr long movie idk why but I’m rarely in mood for them

12. name of your favorite playlist?

Drop the beat (ie songs that are upbeat and I like most)

13. lanyard or key ring?

Hmm...I guess lanyard?

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

Skittles or twizzlers

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

I had lots I had to read in school but only ever finished a handful lol my favorite I think was maybe Macbeth? I would say Odyssey but I don’t think we read the full thing cause I remember being disappointed about something like that...

16. most comfortable position to sit in?

Sitting with my legs bent up in seat with me in some way

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

Converse and some nice but cheap sneakers from Walmart

18. ideal weather?

Not too hot, not too cold, mild like before/after a rain (most the time), idc if it’s raining or sunny but as long as temp is comfortable I’m fine

19. sleeping position?

On my side most often

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?

Phone and notebook

21. obsession from childhood?

Oh gosh uhhh I guess my like of dolls maybe? Or obsession with anything ✨unexplained✨ like ghosts, aliens, cryptids, etc

22. role model?

Kim Namjoon lol just kidding (sorta)

23. strange habits?

Ok I know I have some and my friends would be more than happy to point them all out but hm let me think...idk if these count as habits but I’ll never place a mirror facing a bed (this is more superstitious I guess than habit,,,) I can’t stand my food touching, if I have a tray like in cafeteria I have a certain spot for everything and uh my mind just went blank-

24. favorite crystal?

Moonstone, lapis lazuli, and I feel obligated to say garnet cause it’s my birthstone

25. first song you remember hearing?

Circle of Life maybe who knows xD

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

Walk or clean,,I’m more active and about with warm/nice weather

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

...stay inside where it’s warm

28. five songs to describe you?

Not this again😭 uhhh idk you tell me ajdbd

29. best way to bond with you?

Indulge me when I go off about things I like or learn 😔✊ I know I’ll talk your ear off and I’m sorry but know I don’t often talk about these things with people so once I start it’s hard to stop,,and it makes me really happy when people do listen to me about these things and send me related items every so often or even look into it themselves to learn more 🥺

30. places that you find sacred?

For some reason this feels like a trick question...um cemeteries and anything with ages of history I guess

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?

Oof do I really have a true outfit?? I have shoes for this which are just black platform sneakers I call stomping shoes

32. top five favorite vines?

I never,,,watched these,,,

33. most used phrase in your phone?

“Yes”...?

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?

State Farm and McDonald’s, always

35. average time you fall asleep?

10-11...usually...

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?

Uhhh that one with the ginger dude (I think it was someone’s yearbook photo??) I don’t remember much else about the meme but it was on ifunny, or whatever the app was, a lot

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

Suitcase

38. lemonade or tea?

Easy, tea

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

...neither

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?

Dude these questions really testing my brain power here- for senior prank someone put cereal in some bathroom sinks I think

41. last person you texted?

My mom

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

I’m gonna say jacket since I wear those often

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

Hoodie or cardigan

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

Fantasy

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

Usually whatever shirt I’m wearing that day and some pj/lounge pants 🤷

47. favorite type of cheese?

Mozzarella

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be?

I-what kind of question is this? How does one even answer this?

49. what saying or quote do you live by?

What comes around goes around lol (yes I’m a heavy believer of karma)

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

Lol who knows, probably something dumb me and my siblings were doing or something we watched cause there’s been plenty times of that xD

51. current stresses?

Homework vs free time e-e

52. favorite font?

I like the gothic looking ones but it’s usually not practical to use so idk

53. what is the current state of your hands?

My hands...? They’re fine ??

54. what did you learn from your first job?

How to care for babies and little kids, how to put on a diaper lol

56. favorite tradition?

I can’t remember a particular one off hand but I’m trying to start few new ones like decorating cookies for Halloween uwu

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?

Uhhhhh like personally or...? Cause we’ve overcome homelessness before, um finishing assignments idk😭 oh maybe bullying?? That’s all I can think of since I still struggle with a lot,,

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

Alright let’s do thisss: creativity (mostly in writing sense), I can bake/cook, I have amazing organization skills and many work places have used that lol (bonus is I don’t mind, I actually really enjoy it, very peaceful), surprisingly good balance all things considered, I’m a quick learner

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?

“I’m too tired for this.”

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?

Good question good question🤔 I don’t think I’d last in any of them/have a terrible side character role so 💀

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

“Life’s too short to hold grudges.”

62. seven characters you relate to?

Dude this is gonna get embarrassing I can feel it🤠

Itaru, Iori, Sogo, Belle, Simeon (obey me), Nozaki (he’s clueless about romance irl and doesn’t know when someone has a crush on him yet can write romance well enough and yeah it’s me lol), and uhh Swindler/Ordinary Person in Akudama Drive (still can’t believe no one really has names in that anime but the way she gets wrapped in everything felt like something that’d happen to me lol)

63. five songs that would play in your club?

Like nightclub...? I’m skipping this ajdbd

64. favorite website from your childhood?

Probably the Barbie site, me and my sister played all the dress up games almost daily istg

65. any permanent scars?

Appendectomy scars and then looks like I have one on a toe but it’s possible it still might heal...

66. favorite flower(s)?

Nightshade, foxglove, baby’s breath, bellflowers, roses

67. good luck charms?

I don’t think I have any...

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?

Lemon

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?

Let me think...I read something once about flowers having ears(?) but like not ear ears just something about having a part that picks up sound waves

70. left or right handed?

Right

71. least favorite pattern?

Lolll animal print I think

72. worst subject?

Physics...the worst science

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

6...?

75. when did you lose your first tooth?

I don’t remember, it probably happened when i was 6. I do remember losing one of my front teeth during my birthday one year and I was happy since the tooth had been loose for some time xD

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

Chips I guess or just like fried in skillet

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?

A succulent probably

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

Neither ew

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?

They are both about equally terrible

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

Earth

81. fireflies or lightning bugs?

Fireflies

82. pc or console?

I am on pc side now

83. writing or drawing?

Writing

84. podcasts or talk radio?

Podcasts I guess

84. barbie or polly pocket?

Barbie

85. fairy tales or mythology?

Mythology, it’s too fun and chaotic lol

86. cookies or cupcakes?

Hm...cupcakes

87. your greatest fear?

Uh,,,I don’t have many fears but I guess one would be falling from a great height? So I would get scared of crossing a bridge and it collapsing or riding a plane and it falling easily

88. your greatest wish?

World peace🥲

89. who would you put before everyone else?

My mom maybe...?

90. luckiest mistake?

I honestly don’t remember but something I do remember is I out semicolon instead of period and turned out to be correct grammar lol

91. boxes or bags?

Boxes

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?

Sunlight or fairy lights, I don’t require much either way and prefer more natural lighting

93. nicknames?

Lassie, twinkle toes, Ash, poody butt (by 3 yr old I sometimes watch and play with lol he means it affectionately; I call him monkey butt and it’s catching on slowly instead)

94. favorite season?

Starting to be fall just a little more but I like transition times most

95. favorite app on your phone?

Let’s go with twitter

96. desktop background?

It is a moriarty and gang pic

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?

2: mine and my moms

98. favorite historical era?

Ooo tough one but I’ll say renaissance as some of the coolest things came from that time

#if there’s something messed up in this string of text #ignore it cause I’m not proofreading again ajdbd #I did not realize there were so many questions pls #asks #jade why 😔💜

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