#all his reactive years trying to build better relationships

[alexenglish]

to clarify

#jisung #stray kids #he's so funny #also the part where he says we fight because we love :( #all his reactive years trying to build better relationships #he has worked so hard to love the people around him well 💞 #that's my baby #kp #skztag

[honkytonk-hangman]

Hold The Line

Platonic Jake 'Hangman' Seresin x OC/Reader

Summary: Jake presses his lips together as he lets out a sigh. He leans forward on the railing again, eyes once more following the little boy who was quite happily playing by himself in the sand. “I just thought that Baby Goose deserved to grow up knowing his dad.”

Warnings: mentions of burning in, jake thought process centric lol

Notes: this is a companion piece to my fic Meet You All The Way, focusing on Jake's friendship with reader and most importantly his duties as Uncle Jake. its not overly necessary to read that first, this does kinda function on its own, but probably read that first hehe

Masterlist

Jake is hit with intense dread the moment Rooster steps foot in the Hard Deck that night. Maybe that's why he reactively starts doing his best to get under the other man’s skin as much as he can, as fast as he can. Jake jabs and pokes and thoroughly pisses Bradshaw off to the best of his not insignificant abilities, but even when he succeeds, it doesn’t do much to stop the pervasive unease that gnaws at him.

Not that he really believed it would. It doesn’t even make him feel any better either, in fact it makes him feel much, much worse.

Things hadn’t always been this way. They had been, for a long time, but the past couple of years or so Jake’s relationship with Bradley Bradshaw had softened, somewhat helped along by his friendship with a certain Dr Lamb, who just so happened to be Bradshaw’s wife, as well as the mother of their kid, a kid that Jake loved just as much as, if not more than, any of his actual family. Stuff like that tends to bring folks together, no matter how resistant.

But Jake hadn’t expected to see Rooster back in San Diego along with the others, the enormity and riskiness of the mission seemingly apparent only to Jake, even if he lied through his teeth when his colleagues mentioned similar concerns, if only to try and tell himself this one was just like the others. In the back of his mind though, Jake knows the Navy doesn't make a habit of building special mission squadrons of their top 1%. It was too risky, if something went wrong, all your top aviators could burn in, leaving you with the other 99% that weren’t chosen for a reason. 

Which is precisely how Jake knows this mission is bad news. Sure, it had to be done, but from a pilot’s standpoint, any time the plan allowed for error, for casualties, it was a bad plan. If every member of the special squadron needed to be the best to ensure the mission was completed, despite the fact that some of them were not expected to make it home, then that told Jake everything he needed to know.

Honestly, Jake didn’t think much about burning in. He knows that kind of hubris usually ends poorly, but the fact is, he was good at his job, one of the best, and everything he ever bragged about was something he could back up. It's partly why many people disliked him. The only thing more annoying than unjustified confidence was completely justified confidence.

The other part was that more often than not he was playing the jerk just to get a rise. The fact is; Jake had flown many missions he’ll never be able to talk about, missions that had been dangerous, missions he’d been lucky to just make it out of, let alone live to continue flying. None of them had him worrying the inside of his lip so badly he’d only realise he was doing it when his whole lip was swollen and sore, and he'd taken to fiddling once more with toothpicks just to stop himself from causing even more damage.

By the time they’ve been introduced to the mission instructor, Captain Pete ‘Maverick’ Mitchell, and they’ve gotten an idea of exactly what they would be training for, Jake is at his worst, toothpick not exactly helping people soften to him, his constant barbs more pointed than he would generally be okay dishing out. Even Javy was keeping his distance, sitting in the row of chairs behind his closest colleague and longest friend, instead of in one of the two available spaces beside him.

Jake knows why too.

For once, it’s not about him, though with the way he’d been carrying on you wouldn’t know it.

Jake would never wish to lose any of his squadmates, let alone any of Dagger, most of them people who had come to know and who had put up with him, eventually even accept him. That was a feat worth protecting in and of itself as far as he’s concerned. But Jake had never found himself so fixated on the safety of one squadmate, nor with their grasp and awareness of the realities of their mission, and for the first time in his career feeling, Jake feels properly powerless to do anything but watch Rooster continue to sit on his perch, where he would almost certainly become target practise for a SAM.

The only thing Jake is able to do is push, and needle and either convince Rooster to get his shit together, or be harsh and direct enough in his criticism that even Maverick won’t be able to deny it.

Either way, the outcome is the same: an innocent kid doesn’t lose his father.

He knows that the likelihood of remaining close to Rosie or Goose in the aftermath of his behaviour is extremely low, and if he was acting out of anything except repressed fear, he might’ve chosen to go about this whole nonsense in a far more measured and reasonable manner. But Jake had never been a fan of measured responses, his need for control too much for him to do anything but the most. As the weeks go on and the mission begins to hang dark on the horizon, Jake decides that he could live with never seeing the Bradshaw’s again after all this. As far as Jake is concerned, if it meant that two people who meant more to him than members of his actual family wouldn’t end up burying their husband and father, then what other choice did he have?

Things start to shift and change slightly when he overhears Phoenix asking Rooster about his history with Maverick, and Jake realises exactly who they are to one another, or at least who they used to be to one another.

Something along the lines of Maverick more or less having been Rooster’s adoptive father up until he’d applied for the USNA, after which Rooster had cut Maverick from his life completely. Jake realises then that Maverick, Rooster’s apparent father figure throughout most of his life, had no idea about Rosie, which meant that he had no idea about Goose.

Jake considers breaking out the big guns, exploiting this clear vulnerability, hitting two birds with one stone as not only would Rooster be rightfully furious about his family being brought up and used against him, but he’d also have his little secret revealed, and have to deal with that fallout. It was cruel, and Jake isn’t ashamed to admit he considers it for several days, sitting on the idea, mulling it over, picking his exact angle, choosing the one that would hurt the most and cause the biggest emotional fissure, something even their superiors wouldn’t be able to let go as simple pre-mission tension, something that would end up with Rooster dismissed from this posting, and sent back home. Hell, Jake could even be dismissed for his part in it, but again, he’s not so worried about his own glory this time around.

He’s sitting in the ready room, still contemplating the nuclear option when his phone buzzes. He hadn’t scared Javy off yet today, so his friend glances over at the noise just as Jake unlocks his phone.

His heart drops at the message from you, joined by several photos, which is how he knows he can’t go through with his plan. Never had he received a text from you, especially one with updates on his favourite nephew, and wished he hadn’t. Javy snorts and makes an ‘aww’ sound, not bothering to hide the fact he’s spying on his friend’s screen.

“Man, that kid is going to be so disappointed when he grows up and realises that Uncle Jake is lame,” Javy jokes, pointing at the picture currently on screen, of little Goose in his prospective halloween costume, a flight suit you’ve clearly made for him, complete with sets of patches. In one picture the little replica insignias are identical to Roosters, in the other, they’re a copy of Jake’s own. Your message tells him that Goose was going to wear one out trick-or-treating and the other to a Halloween dress up party at the kids club he attended when you were working late at the hospital.

Jake knows Javy doesn't mean anything by it, he knows how severe his friend can be when he really wanted to needle, but his words hit him with the realisation that if he were to go through with this plan, to expose the existence of Rooster’s family and cause this possibly career stunting blow out, Goose would grow up and find out that his “Uncle Jake”, who he apparently put in the same tier as his own, admittedly pretty great, father, absolutely did not deserve any of his admiration or reverence.

Jake swallows thickly and shuts off his phone without replying. He’d probably call you later, anyhow. Javy frowns at him, but shrugs lightly and watches as Jake pushes up off the couch, moving towards the far wall, needing to just think for a minute. For the first time in weeks he feels enough of his deep-seated dread leave his system, at last letting him think somewhat normally, combined with a clarity that really doesn’t make him feel any better about his recent conduct, definitely making him feel worse about what he’d been planning to do.

He stares blankly at the photos on the wall in front of him and scans each image as he tallies up alternatives, some way to get through to Rooster, make him understand that the way he was flying now would only end badly, it could only end badly, as everyone else seemed to grasp, and struggle with. His eyes flicker over a few grainy faces and move on, before quickly flashing back, blinking in surprise at what he realises he’s looking at.

The surprise pulls him out of his thoughts, away from his tallying and doomsday planning, almost making him forget completely as he stares down at a familiar face that stares back.

“Yo, Coyote, take a look at this!” Jake hears himself call over his shoulder, his eyes never leaving the spot in front of him. Javy approaches casually, leaning down to get a look at the framed photo Jake is transfixed with, easily picking out their instructor, though thirty years younger.

“The man. The legend. There he is.” Javy says lightly, though there is genuine respect lacing his tone. Jake glances over at him and shakes his head.

“No, no, no. Next to him.” Jake says, waiting as Coyote moves slightly closer, his own frown deepening as he gets a good look. “Does he look familiar to you?” he prompts after a moment, before he hears Javy let out a surprised little huff.

“What have we here…” he asks rhetorically, lifting a finger to trace the list of names beneath, until he finds the one that matches.

A new plan begins forming in Jake’s head then, and he straightens up, mind whirling. Javy snorts again and looks back at Jake over his shoulder.

“You realise your little buddy was named after him?” He asks, gesturing to the immortalised image of Rooster’s father. Jake hums. 

He’d known Nick was named for Bradshaw’s father, and he knew that the man had died in an aviation accident when Bradley had been little, but he had never realised where ‘Goose’ as a nickname had come from. He’d just thought it was a play on his Bradshaw’s callsign and Rosie’s surname, Lamb. He hadn’t realised the significance behind it before, and it makes him feel worse..

All the information he’d picked up over the last few weeks suddenly begins to make sense, like he’d finally found the one clue on his mental conspiracy board that suddenly connects all the dots, revealing the bigger picture at last. Whether or not it was the correct image was another thing entirely, it wasn’t even important to Jake’s new plan. It didn’t matter if he was right, in fact it would be better if he was completely off base, in the end, the only thing that really mattered to this new method was that Jake’s underlying point was made clear. Jake knows that if Rooster was able to just get the hell off that damn perch of his, then he’d fly this mission better than maybe anyone else, and give Maverick a run for his money at the same time.

And if that didn’t work, then hopefully Maverick would realise that sending Rooster may as well be signing his death warrant.

Jake takes a long sip of his beer and lets out what might be the first truly relaxed breath he’s had in weeks. Leaning forward against the railing that circled the Hard Deck, Jake keeps his gaze fixed firmly on the five-year-old playing in the sand a few metres away.

“Don’t go too far now, alright buddy?” He calls, knowing that Goose wouldn’t stray on purpose, but also knowing that the boy had a habit of getting so wrapped up in his sweet little head that he’d lose all sense of surroundings.

“Okay, Uncle Jake!” Goose replies cheerfully, dropping to begin digging through the top layer of sand in search of seashells.

For several moments Jake simply basks in the ocean breeze, briefly glancing away from the toddler to scan the horizon, but quickly turns back to him again, far more interested in watching the way Goose sorts the shells he’d found into separate groups. In fact, Jake watches on so attentively that he becomes the one who loses track of what’s going on around him, jumping when you manage to sneak up beside him at the railing, clearly looking pleased with yourself at having caught him off guard.

“Y'all moved in now?” Jake asks, ignoring his brief lapse in chill and choosing instead to glance over at you, clinking your beer with his when you offer it out.

“Yup,” you say, popping the ‘p’ in a way Jake would absolutely find infuriating if anyone but you were to do it. “Mav came around with Penny and Amelia yesterday, and we got it knocked out in a couple of hours.” You tell him, before your face turns more mischievous.

“Why, you weren’t planning on coming around under the guise of helping, just so you could mess with my husband, did you?” you ask teasingly, and Jake rolls his eyes.

“I don’t need to come around to do that. I have his number.” Jake says petulantly, though it reminds him that he hadn’t yet found a good time to actually settle things for good with Rooster. Jake may have saved his life, but he’s enough of a grown up to recognise that an actual apology might be necessary given the nature of the situation.

You laugh at that, and Jake feels an easy smile pull at his lips.

The two of you proceed to lapse into a comfortable silence then, both of you just watching as Goose flutters back and forth, occasionally moving back to the deck to place particular shells for safekeeping. You seem to wait for your son to be fully focused on his self-appointed task again before you speak.

“Rooster told me about your reprimand.” You say lightly, voice devoid of any emotion. Jake purses his lips and squints at the water ahead of him.

“Tattle-tale,” he mutters, before taking a large sip of his beer. You turn your body to face him then and cross your arms over your chest.

“You know, he told me that he wasn’t even really upset you brought up his dad…” you continue, and Jake turns his squint on you, finding your words a little hard to believe. “He told me he barely heard what you actually said, he was so convinced you were about to out him about Goose and I in front of Maverick… he said that was why he reacted the way he did.” Once again your voice is light on any clues as to what you might be thinking, and it makes Jake throw back the remainder of his beer before he speaks again.

“I thought about it. Figured with all things considered, Mav would never choose him if he knew about Goose. Probably would have worked, too.” He admits slowly, choosing his words carefully.

“And remind me again why that was plan a?” You ask dryly and with a healthy amount of ridicule directed towards him. 

Jake shrugs.

“I think you’re seriously overestimating the thought process that went into this, which for the record, was not a single one.” he replies truthfully, shaking his head.  “Could have gotten my ass DD’ed for pulling that shit.” Jake grumbles, both at his previous behaviour, and at how differently things would have gone if Maverick was the type of Commanding Officer who concerned himself at all with little things like direct insubordination.

You hum your agreement then, seemingly satisfied that he was aware of how stupid he’d been. Jake sighs heavily then, and runs a hand through his hair.

“My thoughts on Rooster’s capabilities as a pilot versus the way he actually flies aren’t exactly top secret.” Jake states, readying himself to explain to you what exactly had been so important to him that he’d wound up with an official reprimand over. “The way he was flying the sims wasn’t going to cut it, and frankly, he seemed more preoccupied with proving something to Maverick—” he cuts himself off at that, shaking his head again, and you don’t push him to finish.

Jake presses his lips together as he lets out a sigh, and leans forward on the railing again, eyes once more following the little boy who was quite happily playing by himself in the sand.

“I just thought that Goose deserved to grow up knowing his dad,” Jake confesses at last, feeling slight nerves bubbling in his belly at the frankness of his thoughts, but he can’t help himself from eventually glancing over at you in order to gauge your reaction as you consider what he’s said.

Your expression remains thoughtful, but otherwise unreadable, and for several more seconds the two of you stare at one another, until at last you shift your eyes away from him, and back to your son on the beach.

“I’m gonna suggest that next time, you should try giving communicating at a basic adult level a go first,” you say at last, your voice dripping with even more ridicule now, even more deserved this time. “And then I guess if that doesn’t work, you can move on to starting a fight in the middle of a debriefing with your Commanding Officer.”

“I’ll keep it in mind.” Jake tells you, his tone sarcastic purely out of habit, but he really does mean it.

A beat passes and it occurs to Jake that Rooster must not have told you any details about how the mission had ended up playing out, how despite Jake’s best intentions and worst behaviour, the thing that almost meant Rooster didn’t make it home to you and Goose, had been entirely out of his control, and that it was Jake’s actions that had meant Rooster would be able to return to your family after all was said and done, just like he’d been pushing to make happen from the start.

He blinks down at you, brought out of his thoughts when you bump into his side, nudging his arm with your elbow.

“Thank you, for not saying anything before he got the chance to tell Maverick himself… and for trying to look out for him.”

Jake nods solemnly, before he lifts his arm to wrap around your shoulder, giving you a brief squeeze as you both focus back on watching Goose again.

“For the record, it wasn’t him I was looking out for.” Jake cuts into the silence after a few minutes. You barely move to acknowledge his words, except for the roll of your eyes.

“If you keep ruining the moment, I’m going to tell Rooster that you complimented his abilities as a pilot.”

Jake glares down at you, but promptly clamps his mouth shut. To your credit, you don’t gloat about your victory, already focusing back on the apparent moment you were sharing, giving up all pretence of sourness when the sun begins peeking perfectly through the clouds, and Goose takes off running toward the two of you, a large collection of seashells gathered in his hands, shouting that he’d found one for you, following up right away by asking if you’ll put it on your desk at work. Jake takes that as his cue to release you, moving to instead swoop Goose up in his arms.

You watch as Jake carries your son back down to the sand, listening intently as he shows him each of the shells he’d found and chattering away about each of them as Jake asks. You smile a little wider when you sense Rooster stepping into place at your side, and he wraps his arm around your shoulder. You hum contently, and rest a hand against his chest.

“I think I’m willing to reconsider this whole ‘Uncle Jake’ topic.” Your husband tells you, earning an incredulous laugh from you.

“I’m sorry to ruin your illusion of control, but that ship sailed a while ago,” you chortle as Rooster grimaces and shoots you a look. You pat his chest sympathetically, and he covers your hand with his own. You both watch Jake and Goose for a few more peaceful moments, until your boy notices Rooster standing with you. “Daddy! Come play!” Goose calls out. Rooster grins widely as Jake begins talking loudly about how he isn’t brave enough to come out onto the sand. You watch as Rooster vaults the railing, and your heart grows soft as both aviators begin to give chase to Goose, with Rooster eventually gathering him up and holding him still for Jake to tickle.

#jake seresin #jake seresin/reader #jake seresin imagine #jake seresin fanfiction #jake hangman seresin x reader

[neodarkdark]

gladiolus :   describe a moment from your muse’s life that they will never forget . // hydrangea :   how much does your muse value communication in their relationships with others ?are they prone to being misunderstood ?

Botanical headcanon prompts

Gladiolus — Describe a moment from your muse's life that they will never forget.

Normally the go-to answer for this is his first exposure to the Shadow Crystal, but that's slightly different in fandomless verse and I haven't got all the details sorted in my head, so I'll try something else.

A moment Svern remembers well is when he first actively reacted against his cousin (who does not technically have a set name yet, but for some reason I keep referring to him in my head as Luke, so let's call him that). Luke is a few years older than Svern (or Sylvester then), and was the biggest single source of bullying for Svern's yet-unmasked Issues.

Luke didn't like Sylvester because Sylvester was a little weirdo who never talked to you unless he had a reason (which usually meant correcting you for something or just being obnoxiously Smart and Better than you), who was never happy, was never upset, talked in a weird monotone voice always and also was unfairly good at everything.

There is also an unfortunate thing that happens when you're known for not reacting to anything ever, and that is if you hang out with the wrong kind of kids, they see you as a curious thing to poke and prod.

Svern had been tolerating this kind of poking and prodding, verbal and physical teasing, for years, and over years it just got worse. For a long time the only way he reacted was passively: ignore, turn away, leave. Since Svern is not a very reactive person, and back then was very bad at expressing himself, he could put up with a lot, seemingly, without being bothered (which only fed into it getting worse). When he did get bothered enough to either leave or (stoically) tell Luke to stop, Luke took this as a victory as well and made a big deal of how the emotionless weirdo did get annoyed after all. Svern spent years of not reacting much beyond that and quietly building up resentment toward not only Luke, but other people who weren't quite so obviously bad about it but still were in their own ways.

So, Svern will always remember when that finally hit the point where he did feel recognisably, truly angry, and took an active reaction against Luke.

It was a year or two after he had started masking successfully, which contributed, as Luke both had used this as another way to try and get under Svern's skin (look who's gotten so good at pretending, but we both know you're a little liar, so you're even creepier than you were before) and Svern had now learned how to act in ways that he wouldn't have beforehand. Unfortunately this also marked the point where they both got a lot more malicious in their behaviour toward each other in general.

Hydrangea — How much does your muse value communication in their relationships with others? Are they prone to being misunderstood?

Svern delights in leaving others hanging and not being clear with his intentions, leading them along etc., so I would say his value of communication in interpersonal relationships is pretty low. Then again, a lot of this stems from the fact that he is constantly maintaining a certain distance from everyone else, lack of communication feeds that distance, and it's very hard for relationships with him to go beyond a certain depth (the depth where he would start properly caring about how this communication or lack thereof affects the other person more).

He is aware that good communication is valuable to relationships, and he knows how to achieve it, he just doesn't do so most of the time.

Prone to being misunderstood? Yes, again with the caveat that he could easily make himself less misunderstood, but at least half of the reason he's misunderstood is on purpose. If he's not actively being confusing, he's at least playing into other people's uncertain views of him.

Considering so much of him hinges on nobody really knowing what's up with him, and he specifically likes it that way, he's not going to be winning any awards in clear communications anytime soon.

#who's that knocking at your door? (inbox) #technodromes #boredom is so terrible like a dread disease (headcanon)

[t-lane-writes]

(read on WordPress)

The Ribbon

Another story introduction. I started to write this one about ten years ago, without really having any direction. I just had that image in my head. It ended up inspiring nearly 5k words, but then I ran out of inspiration and the story was left to whither.

Recently, I considered writing a short-ish companion piece to another novella I’m about to finish soon. By “novella” I mean a story of about 40 k words. The Ribbon could be just that companion piece. It deals with similar themes and, with a little stretch of imagination, could easily be set in the same larger universe.

After some thought, I now have a synopsis of the story and a solid prospect of getting it done. I put it on a back-burner for now, because I have more pressing ideas to write, but it definitely has potential.

Story synopsis

Gabriel Hayes is a Warden, a person tasked with protecting the border between the Ribbon, a patch of land where life is possible on this inhospitable, tidally locked planet, and the planet’s Dark Side. Because of recent events, he feels he’s failed and become a disgrace to his profession. His teammates, Odila Mae and Filip Snoch, sense that something is wrong. Due to a mistake made by one of them – or maybe it’s fate – Odila gets kidnapped by “monsters”. Gabriel and Filip, without long deliberation, go after her. They find a settlement where the “monsters” live. Turns out they are people, who had been getting by on the Dark Side for generations. They are deformed and weak, but at the same time they managed to retain the legends from ancient times. Filip’s knowledge of technology and curious nature allow him to see more in those legends than just children’s stories. They seem to carry a lot of scientific information. Odila meanwhile builds a relationship with some of those people, befriends a woman named Quillac, whose family for generations had attempted a search of the Center, where all answers and the salvation of all humankind is stored. Quillac and a few others are just now preparing to undertake another journey. They know that most of them will probably never return, but those who will, should be able to provide new information about how to find the Center. Eventually, she says, someone will. Odila encourages Filip and Gabriel to join Quillac and her people. Soon, they are on the road through dark, cold desert. They follow the path directed by stars and all those who traveled before them. The three Wardens are stronger than the people from the Dark Side, endure better. As those from Dark Side weaken and either turn back, or simply die, Gabriel and Filip wonder if they shouldn’t return as well. Odila says, however, that as long as Quillac goes, she will go too. And Quillac is very determined. Usually the travelers turn back when less then half of the initial group remains, but this time when decision has to be made, Quillac says she will go as long as it takes or she’ll die trying. While her remaining compatriots decide to turn back, Odila, and with her Filip and Gabriel decide to follow Quillac. At the edge of their endurance, they finally find the Center – it is a large structure, obviously man-made. They find a way in and realize it’s a technologically advanced spaceship. The legends finally make sense – their ancestors had crashed on the dark side of this planet and, unable to repair the spaceship, decided to try and build a civilization. The planet allowed them to live here for nearly a thousand years, but their time is coming to an end. Filip manages to reactivate some of the ship’s systems, it is getting warmer here, there’s food and water. They also find a way to send a distress signal into space in hopes that someone will come and save the people fated for extinction. He also finds access to a vast database of the ship. The response from space comes a few months later, but the actual rescue is decades away. They will come. Eventually.

Let me know if it makes you curious!

#my stories #original stories #original writing #writeblr #science fiction #the ribbon

[evermorehqs]

CATCHING MY BREATH, STARING OUT AN OPEN WINDOW 

Nicholas St. North is based on North from Rise of the Guardians. He is a 42 year old/immortal spirit, carpenter/toymaker, and uses he/him pronouns. He has the power of wonder, magic, crafting and swordsmanship. Nicholas is portrayed by Chris Pine and he is taken.

CATCHING MY DEATH, AND I COULDN’T BE SURE 

Nicholas understands that not many people care about kids the that way he does. Wonder and the spark of magic were interwoven into his DNA so he was acutely attuned with it. The way that childhood magic so quickly disappears from the world; the joy, the merriment..the wonder. He’s seen it fade more and more often, something changing over the centuries, an enemy continuing to try and steal the joy from the world. From the moment his eyes opened, it’s been his mission to keep the mirth alive for as long as he can and he takes that job very seriously. At his core, he is a protector - a warrior of wonder with a heart of gold. Fierce, demanding and impulsive, everything about him is larger than life and nothing is impossible as long as he believes in it. He will always fight to make sure children are protected which can lead to him being stern or reactive but he isn’t an unreasonable man. At the end of the day, he’d rather be laughing instead of arguing but that doesn’t mean he won’t kick down a door if he has to.

Waking up in Evermore, Nick knew things were different and yet, his purpose was entirely the same. There were spots in his memory that were blurry, blending together over the millennia with only a few key moments standing out. And people. His friends, the Guardians, and their enemy, all destined to continue their never ending war regardless of where they were. Thankfully, Nick lost none of his wonder or skills when it came to the sword or carpentry, quickly setting up shop as the local toymaker. Evermore felt like home quickly. No, it wasn’t the North Pole and he didn’t have his yetis or elves, but he made do with his own two hands. There was nothing as fulfilling as creating something in his shop that would bring a light to someone’s eye and a smile to their face. Hours upon hours, Nick would be in his shop sawing and hammering away, building until the sun fell and rose again and he was as content as could be. He doesn’t know why he’s here but perhaps this is just another trick of the moon and he knows better than to question where the moon sends him.

I HAD A FEELING SO PECULIAR 

❀ Jack Frost: In the beginning, their relationship was a rocky one, Nick couldn’t help but feel a little threatened by the young man’s impulsive and immature behavior but they’ve grown much closer and he feels like a mentor now even if they still get into sarcasm battles 

❀ Madonna Tremaine: People might not take the list very seriously, but Madonna would be on the top of the naughty one. She may be an attractive and charming woman, but Nick knows better than to be fooled by her ways - or at least, he tries

❀ Dawn Bellwether: Sanderson has mentioned that something seems off about Dawn but Nick has a hard time believing that. Just look at her face! And her glasses! Someone like that couldn’t possibly have a bad bone in their body

THAT THIS PAIN WOULD BE FOR EVERMORE

#rotg #disney rp #taken bio #taken male #male bio #has powers #disney skeleton rp #rise of the guardians

[andraaste]

I am not your enemy - Lance fanfiction part 14

And finally, it’s doooone ! Forgive me for the wait 💕

Chapter 14 : I just stopped hoping for your awakening

- Andraste, is everything okay ? Nevra asked, somewhat surprised at my sudden reaction.

I was about to tell him that it was none of his business when the pain, much more throbbing, resumed again, literally cutting my breath. Without warning, panic started to take me over and it was with confusion that I stood up and dodged his piercing gaze as he remained leaning over me, being too ashamed to tell him everything that was wrong with me.

The vampire still maintained the idea of ​​helping me to stand up completely and, when his hand finally let go of my shoulder, I immediately stepped back in order to establish sufficient distance between us, which didn’t escape him.

- Yes, it's nothing, I finally replied, feigned levity.

Falling back into the void, his hand remained inert along his side as his mouth opened and closed again without any sound coming out.

A wind much colder than before I fell asleep began to blow between us, causing my hair to fly and goosebumps on my bare arms. In order to warm myself up, I put my hands on them as the chills that ran through my skin burned my back unpleasantly.

I think my head was starting to spin.

- Are you sure everything is fine ? Didn't you hurt yourself somewhere or anything ?

- No, don't worry, I replied quickly. I hadn't planned to doze off here, the ground was too hard and I must have hurt a bit, but nothing serious.

I especially didn't want Nevra to know what was happening to me, I didn't think I would be able to bear this shame again in the eyes of another person.

Much to my dismay, the vampire didn't seem convinced. He took a step in my direction, reducing the distance I had deliberately created. An eyebrow raised, his gaze fell on mine.

- Do you know that I still know you by heart ? I can see you're in pain, there's no point in trying to hide it from me.

I breathed out as much air as possible against my poor acting skills. He would never let go, I was sure.

We had left each other angry earlier, though, so why didn't he take his eyes off me right now ? I felt confused, I didn't know how to react.

What's more, I had to admit that I was seriously starting to wonder if constantly blowing hot and cold wasn’t an Eldaryan custom.

Or maybe I was drawn to complicated relationships, who knows.

- Really, it's my luck, I said ironically. So you decided that I existed in your eyes, today ?

His features imperceptibly hardened as his gaze darkened so quickly that I thought I was dreaming for a moment.

- Andraste...

- What Nevra ? Are you going to tell me to pretend nothing has happened ? I was starting to get carried away. It's all well and good to behave towards me as you see fit, but it doesn't work that way.

It was his turn to exhale for a long time. Coming even closer, he took me completely by surprise, lowering his head until he came to rest his forehead against my shoulder, his dark hair brushing my shoulder blade. I remained frozen in place, unable to make the slightest movement as his breath caressed my skin.

I could no longer get my ideas clear.

- Listen, I don't know how to behave when I see you anymore, he finally blurted out, his voice slightly muffled by his probably uncomfortable position. You were the center of my world and overnight I had to relearn how to evolve without you by my side. Everyone was only talking about your sacrifice, he almost spat, but all I wanted was for you to come back to me.

He slowly lifted his head from my shoulder and came back to fix his gaze on mine. I was hanging from his lips, totally mesmerized by the words he finally addressed to me.

- Every day, for a little over a year, I didn’t stop making this wish, however selfish. Sometimes I would spend hours watching you, convincing myself that at any moment you were going to wake up. Except that it never happened, he added quietly, as if saying it out loud could shatter the dreams of this memory of him. I ended up decreasing over time my visits to the Crystal Room, I could no longer distinguish a vague sleeping figure. So to protect myself, I think I just stopped hoping for you to wake up.

The emotion Nevra was feeling at that moment overwhelmed me. I suspected that he must have suffered from this situation, but given his behavior towards me since I woke up, I had difficulty in realizing how he felt. On the other hand, I hadn’t imagined for a single second that it could still affect him at this point now.

- I didn't know all this, Nevra, you never told me about it until now. I never imagined you could feel this, I'm so sorry...

A wistful smile appeared on his lips.

- It's in the past now, even if I don't hide from you that I thought I had serious hallucinations when I saw you again.

Following these words, the vampire leaned down until his face was only inches from mine, allowing me to admire his scarred gaze under his thick black hair.

- I was a complete idiot to you, Andraste. I only took my feelings into account regardless of yours, but it was the only way I found to protect myself again. I'm terribly sorry, you absolutely don’t deserve this indifference, he confessed to me while placing a light and icy hand on my cheek. I hope you will forgive me.

Nevra was standing close, way too close for my breathing to calm down. I swallowed the air with more and more difficulty and, seized by strong emotions, the currents of energy began to circulate again in anarchy under my skin.

The young man finally withdrew his hand before standing up to his full height. Looking up at the sky, he quickly returned to plant them in mine with deep attention.

- Night has almost fallen, we better get back to HQ, he said softly.

I nodded and turned in the direction of HQ when his hand grabbed my arm the same way it had several hours earlier.

I was taken aback to find that his face had suddenly closed completely, brows furrowed.

- You're bleeding, what's happening to you ?

I widened my eyes.

- What ?

- I can smell your blood, it's not normal, he explained to me while making me rotate back to him.

Instinctively, I slapped a hand on the small of my back as my fingers slid over the thick streaks of liquid that flowed against my top.

No.

Not now, it wasn’t possible.

Nevra only took a fraction of a second to react when he saw my fingers red with hemoglobin.

A strong concern marked the tone of his voice as he spoke again :

- What's the matter with your back ? You tell me that everything has been fine since earlier, and now you start to piss blood !

- It's nothing serious, I promise. I just have to go see Eweleïn, she'll know what to do.

I still had the words he'd had when he saw me come out of the infirmary, but I think I just had no choice but to have to go back.

- I'll take you there immediately.

Binding action to word, he grabbed me under the knees and lifted me off the ground to carry me in his arms. The journey was surprisingly short to the entrance of the large building of the HQ while the abundant loss of blood finally got the better of my lucidity.

When they reached the door of the infirmary, Nevra began to pound forcefully on the door. It opened wide, revealing an Eweleïn with suddenly astonished features.

- Nevra, what happened to her ?

The vampire quickly explained the facts to her as he laid me down on the bed. The ground was turning dangerously, or maybe it was just my head that couldn't follow.

- Turn around, the nurse ordered him with authority, before leaning over me. Andraste, we're going to have to take this garment off.

I let her withdraw my sticky top without flinching before falling into a deep sleep.

*

I blinked several times in an attempt to focus, only seeing blurry elements around me. It was far from the first time I had woken up in this bed in the past few days and it made my lips pursed in frustration.

How did I end up in the infirmary again ?

Head heavy, I struggled to sit up on the soft mattress, looking for any sign of life in the room. But no one seemed to be standing here. Swallowing my saliva with difficulty, I realized that my throat was so dry that no sound could have come out anyway immediately, I felt like I had swallowed razor blades.

Feeling obstructed, I lifted my top and found a large bandage wrapped around my chest, with red spots marking the fabric as far as I could see. I was really hoping that my miraculous healing system had reactivated, like the time my stomach wound closed on its own in a very short time, because I wasn’t going to put up with this situation much longer. Moving slightly, I noticed that the pain had practically disappeared. I lowered the garment over my wounds then stood up slowly. The world was still spinning a little too fast for my liking, but I felt fit to get out of here.

I was finishing putting on my shoes when the door finally opened, revealing a long white hair in my field of vision.

- Oh hello Andraste, you're finally awake. How do you feel ? the elf asked with a soft smile.

- Hello Ewe, I think I’m okay. I’m not feeling at my best, but I’m no longer in pain.

- Perfect, I'll give you a quick test but I think you're fit to go out.

Sitting back on the bed, I let the nurse auscultate me without batting an eyelid.

- Your back is much better, even your skin has started to reform normally. I hope this story of stuck wings will get better soon.

- Oh reassure you, I hope so too, I said in a mirthless laugh. Can I go, now ?

- Yes, just a second.

She grabbed the same jar of cream as the last time and handed it to me, a smile on her lips.

- Here, you’ll have to brush your back with this until your skin is better.

- Very good, but it may be rather complicated, since it’s not an area necessarily accessible for me...

I saw Eweleïn's smile widen even more.

- Oh, I understood that someone could take care of it for you, but if it doesn't, you just have to come see me and I'll take care of it.

I narrowed my eyes at her suspicious expression.

- What are you talking about ?

- Nothing at all, and hurry up to see me if it starts again, don't wait any longer to bleed ! Come on, go, she ordered me with a wink.

Too tired to try to understand, I opened the door to rush into the hallway. But how long had I slept, exactly ? It was still dark !

Entering the guard corridor, I walked past several doors until I reached Lance's room, just before mine. I paused for a moment, hesitating, observing thoughtfully the image of the dragon towering over it at full length. Was he busy, right now ?

Heart pounding, I was about to knock when my arm caught in the air.

I didn't have to turn around to see who it was, letting myself be completely taken in by his mere presence.

- Good evening, my little dragon, his voice whispered with an amused grin.

Light streaks of ice were already drawing a multitude of abstract shapes on my skin as my lips stretched on their own.

Giving way to a huge smile on my face.

(Chapter 15)

#eldarya #eldarya new era #i am not your enemy #eldarya lance #lance eldarya #lance #eldarya the origins #ashkore #beemoov #eldarya fanfic #eldarya ane #eldarya fanfiction #fanfic #fanfiction

[hillbillyoracle]

Some Thoughts on Why White Pagans Need to Heal Their Relationships with Christianity

Note: I've been trying to write a piece like this for months and the only way I know how to write this is to be very vulnerable and personal. So just please keep that in mind as you read this. It isn't very refined and it's something I'm still very much in process with, to borrow a phrase from my charismatic Christian upbringing. It's more a diary entry than a finished piece and none of these thoughts are original or eloquent. My hope it's helpful to see someone thinking through these things though.

If you're white and you don't want to further colonization and imperialism in your spirituality, then going back to Christianity in some form is pretty necessary; to do the work of decolonizing it's doctrines and to prevent taking from traditions that aren't ours.

This is just the conclusion I've arrived at after a lot shadow working in and around both my ancestors and my religious trauma. My ancestors aren't all white Europeans. But given that I'm white and I don't have any way to carry on the traditions of those that weren't, I feel like the best way to honor those non-white ancestors is to go back to the spiritual traditions I do have access to and doing the work of reshaping them into something less harmful.

I have read and intellectually understood that culture forms the foundation of spirituality and that when you remove something from it's originating culture, that concept or tool no longer works properly, if at all. In working with my non-white ancestors, I really got it on a practical and emotional level. There was this sense that they'd love for me to know their traditions but that it required an understanding that just isn't possible for me given my upbringing and disconnection - "you don't know the words and there's no way to find a person who can teach you" as one ancestor put it. It was an important reminder that "this isn't for white people" isn't merely a categorical assertion but a cultural and practical one.

They've generally asked I stick to practices I have a cultural grounding in when honoring them, even though it is not theirs - the cultural and linguistic element is that important to them. They would rather an authentic expression of gratitude and care through a ritual that isn't theirs rather than an imitation of one that is or being left out of my practice all together. Which makes sense to me in a relational way I hadn't fully grasped before.

In working with my white ancestors, I've come to more viscerally understand that the present understanding of Christianity is wildly different than other historical understandings. One thing that surprised me was that some of my more recent ancestors have expressed more discomfort around my queerness and transness than many of my older ancestors but both root their understanding in the Bible. I enjoyed one ancestor who, when I explained that I'm partnered with a woman, to mean that I would have a life of service - "no men to distract you from God" - which I mean is not wrong on several levels. It really highlighted for me that Christian doctrine is far more flexible than I'd initially thought. It challenged ideas I'd picked up through traumatic religious experiences. So much of what I'd assumed was Christianity itself seems to be more Christianity right now.

The historical angle is really important me. One of the things that drove my interest in Paganism was trying to understand what came before Christianity, to connect with whatever had been cut off in that process. The more I've come to learn about imperialism within Europe - how various empires conquered and destroyed localized traditions indigenous to parts of Europe - it clicked for me that my white ancestors did to others what had been done to them. It is intergenerational trauma in a nutshell.

It's also striking to me that so many people term the traditions pagans pull from as "dead" religions or at the very least "not living". For years I took that to mean they were "safe" to take from, that I wouldn't hurt anyone by doing so. But I hadn't really understood the weight of what "dead" meant - that there was no one left alive who could teach me, that I can't live in a context where all of the beliefs, tools, and traditions make intuitive sense. And if it was important to my ancestors who had had a connection to their traditions, then what was I missing by reanimating these traditions without that link?

I don't have a full visceral understanding of what I'm missing to be honest. I have a feeling that'll develop as my practice evolves. But that question alone has marked a pretty important change in how I understand myself spiritually.

The living and cultural element to my practice is more important to me now. For me, just given the family, community, and area I was raised in, that means Christianity is the living tradition I have access to and I've been revisiting it. I was reading an interview the other day with someone who is both a Catholic theologian and a practicing Buddhist. I liked the way he put it when he referred to Catholicism as "one of his sources of wisdom". That better captures my relationship with Christianity that's been unfolding over the last few months.

Making sure that intergenerational spiritual trauma stops as much as possible with me is really important. I had mistakenly thought that meant abandoning Christianity all together, that it was the problem. Which in hindsight, is fucking wild - I hugely fucked up there. There's nothing stopping me from just enacting the harm I learned in the context of Christianity in a different context, a Pagan context. It doesn't get to the root of the issue. At the end of the day, I just want to be sure I do not use my religion, any religion, to further the harms of structural inequality and colonial oppression. That's the goal.

In reading around about this, I've come to feel pretty strongly that one of the best ways to work toward that is to strive toward animism. Animism has been a great antidote to the spiritual entitlement that colonial religions cultivate (including white paganism). Animism also builds a relational spirituality rather than a goal/individual centered one. White paganism isn't inherently animistic since white culture teaches values that undermine quality relationships - individualism, competitiveness, and seeking domination of some fashion in order to feel safe. An animistic lens requires you unlearn those values and cultivate new ones - mutuality, respect, and accountability.

So all this is to say that given my current understanding, I think trying to build a practice out of New Age concepts while trying to avoid appropriation sounds impossible and hellish. I also think it doesn't deal with the work that needs done. I'm choosing to take an animist lens to the living traditions I do have to see if that's a better space for both my spirituality and my evolving understand of decolonizing to grow in.

People will rightly question my use of the term "shadow work" given this perspective. Shadow work is a problematic term for a lot of different reasons that are beyond the scope of this piece.  Where I'm at with it right now is that most western religious traditions seem to have some understanding of what we might call shadow work which points to it being important and useful. However they all used different terms given their contexts so I'm still unsure of what term might be the most appropriate given where I'm at. So for right now, you might see me use it less in the title or body of work I write from here on out, but I still might use it as a tag to make it findable. There's a good shot this doesn't go far enough and I'm not sold on this approach. Just know it's something I'm trying to figure out.

So that's where I'm at right now. I think white pagans really need to be more serious about animism at minimum and hopefully also looking at the role living religious traditions play in their current practice as well. I think white pagans' unhealed reactivity around Christianity too often serves as a justification for spiritual appropriation and furthering colonial harm. Changes are definitely needed. What that looks like in practice for individuals will likely vary a ton. I'd love to hear from other folks doing work in this vein. What's worked for you so far? What hasn't? Where are you in the process?

#witchblr #witch #magic #pagan #paganism #A lot of this is inspired by working with the Hierophant more closely

[bigskydreaming]

I know that you don't think there should be conflict between Dick and Jason because of Robin and I get that, but I was just wondering since it so often does happen that way or is referenced happening in the past what do you think the most ideal resolution for that would be?

I mean to be honest, I don't think there is any ideal resolution if its JUST between Dick and Jason, is the thing? Like its not even that I dislike the trope because its not canon based, its that it COULD be an okay conflict if it kept the right things centered instead of just casually bringing them up but without ever putting focus on them.

What I mean by that is like....the reason this trope is usually such a problem IMO beyond just being unnecessary, is that.....people always try and just address it as this issue that exists between Dick and JASON.....

Even while acknowledging - but just in passing - that the REAL issue is and always was between Dick and BRUCE.

So like, you can't EVER adequately resolve a conflict IMO, if you're not actually resolving it between the right parties. Its not something that can be 'fixed' just by Dick and Jason because it isn't something that was CAUSED by Dick and Jason. It wasn't even caused by Dick! The conflict in as much as it does exist, stems entirely from possible reactions Dick did or could have had to BRUCE's ACTIONS.

And people keep trying to erase Bruce from that equation on the back end, even while paying lip service to the acknowledgment that he's part of the equation on the front end, and that just doesn't work and it never can, IMO. You're retroactively making it a problem between the wrong people entirely, and it shouldn't be surprising then that resolutions that only involve those specific people don't ever fully adequately resolve the problem caused by another person entirely.

Like, the 'resolution' is almost ALWAYS just Dick saying he realizes he was an ass to Jason and it wasn't Jason's fault, and then makes it all about making it up to Jason. And there's soooooooo many ways to address this issue, that for that to be the one and ONLY resolution we pretty much ever see - and with it not even involving Bruce at all - that's a problem.

There are SO many ways to still have this as a kind of conflict to some degree or another and resolve it WITHOUT just throwing Dick under the bus and acting in PRACTICE like he's the one doing something wrong even while saying something else about Bruce.

But pretty much all of them involve BRUCE doing SOMETHING....because ultimately....it all goes back to Bruce and not Dick.

So if Dick is behaving like an ass to Jason in a story? Dick 'realizing this' and apologizing still isn't that strong a resolution, because either Dick explains his side of things and why he reacted that way, in which case there's a high likelihood that its going to still read to a lot of readers like him weakly making excuses for himself but not actually justifying anything he said or did to Jason in the story....or the other possibility is that Dick takes full responsibility so as to NOT come across as just trying to make excuses for himself, and dives into the reparations and accountability whole-heartedly, in which case Dick never actually gets his side of the story delved into and his emotions and reactions upheld as valid or even just understandable or sympathetic to any meaningful degree.

But the problem I have even here is then.....well, why is it treated like Dick is the only possible person who can even speak up on Dick's behalf? Why does he always have to self-advocate? Even if Bruce is still being obtuse about what he did wrong - Alfred was there, he knows what happened and is more than capable of grasping the real root of Dick being upset, you can have Barbara explain to Jason why this hit Dick so badly and how it really had nothing to do with Jason, one of the other Titans can step in on Dick's behalf, Clark or Diana can say something....

There's a dozen other characters who can advocate FOR Dick and speak up for him TO Jason, explain the FULL situation and try and put Dick in a better light so as not to sour Jason on his new brother and try and preserve whatever potential relationship they build in the future once Dick's better able to move past his hurt or make his peace with it, via Jason having just....more information and being in a position to be more sympathetic about it rather than just hurt and reactive on his OWN behalf - which is literally all Dick is doing in the first place, so Jason's more than capable of understanding that mindset!

Like, Jason's a very empathetic character, and he more than ANYONE else in the Batfam is capable of grasping the nuances of having barely anything left to remember your family by, anything good to hold on to, and to see THAT just given away to a total stranger by someone who has no right to give it away in the first place? Jason is the MOST likely person to be outraged on Dick's behalf if he hears the whole story from someone unlikely to downplay it the way Dick usually does in order to not make Jason feel worse about it. He'd be like...what the fuck, who the fuck thinks that's okay?

It is so, SO easy to preserve Dick and Jason's potential brotherly relationship by just....letting someone else speak for Dick and cast him in a positive light specifically because Dick DOES believe in accepting full accountability when he thinks he's done anything wrong to any degree. He's not someone who tries to spin his own mistakes, he takes more blame than he usually deserves.....so its kinda what I was saying earlier about how people tend to take advantage of him being an unreliable narrator. Why is his side of things so often limited to just HIM defending himself to others when its well established that a core part of his character is he doesn't really believe in going all in on defending himself in the first place? That he's more than willing to take the fall? (With this of course having a ton to do with his self-esteem issues and his uncertainty or lack of trust in the security of his place in his home or family, but I digress).

But you see what I mean? We KNOW Dick's not the best advocate for himself because of his well advertised guilt complex....so why is he so often left to be the only one to advocate for himself even in situations where there are many, MANY other onlookers with as full a grasp of the problem as he has himself, and no reason to pin the blame on Dick or cast him in a negative light?

And for me, it always comes back to fandom's tendency to try and divert attention away from Bruce's own accountability in this matter - because refusing to have anyone else speak up for Dick comes from the same place IMO as not having Bruce step up to volunteer his own accountability in the matter. People don't WANT Jason being mad at Bruce for this or resenting Bruce for getting his relationship with his new brother off to such a poor start by literally giving away the only thing Dick had left of HIS family, the one thing in the world he still had that didn't come from Bruce originally, the way Dick didn't himself.

So like....the answer to your question is I don't think there can ever be a true resolution between JUST Dick and Jason alone, because the second you make any kind of real conflict between them on this matter even if just initially, Jason IS valid in being hurt by ANY degree of distance or being treated coolly by Dick, because Jason did absolutely nothing wrong....so its not on Jason to resolve this......but by the same token, there is this tendency for Dick to default to being an unreliable narrator here and UNDERSELL how much he was actually HURT by this rather than just acting like an ass because of this specifically - which means the FOCUS is still always going to be on WHAT Dick did rather than WHY.....and thus ensures that there's never going to be a true focus on WHY Dick felt hurt and HOW Dick felt hurt.....and thus there's never going to ever be any real resolution to THAT specifically, either.

And THAT'S the ultimate problem. That addressing this conflict between Dick and Jason - its not enough to just have Dick 'get' that he's hurting Jason who doesn't deserve it, and apologize for that and do better, and thus things are resolved and made better for JASON.....but ONLY Jason. Dick still, in this scenario, has to essentially just get over it.

And if your conflict on any level acknowledges to any degree that Dick's attitude or whatever is still ultimately just coming from a place of hurt....

Dick 'getting over it' isn't good enough. That's not actually a resolution. That's writing Dick as settling for an acceptance that HE'S never going to get a resolution so the best he can hope for is to get over it himself in order to make things better for him and Jason instead of just spreading the hurt all around. And that sucks, pretty much.

So I'd say in any case, you're still better served in this conflict by having literally anyone OTHER than Dick broach the subject with Jason first and at least pave the way for Jason to be sympathetic and understanding, so that Dick's not just 'immature' or 'spoiled' or 'acting like an asshole' as the prime takeaway - no, he's a nineteen year old who's been on the outs with Bruce for well over a year by this point and he's hurt by Bruce's seeming thoughtlessness over how he'd be affected by not just giving away Robin, but adopting someone else without even notifying Dick himself of a new addition to their family, or even attempting to first clarify with Dick what the status of Dick in relation to this family actually even is.

But ultimately, I'm always going to fall back on saying that if you're going to make this a conflict between the brothers initially, to ANY degree....the only TRUE resolution requires BRUCE being the one to take the initiative and resolve things for ALL of them, by being frank and just saying hey, he fucked up here, and explaining to Jason why Dick was hurt by what he did and how it had nothing to do with Jason, which in the process of that demonstrates for Dick that Bruce actually GETS how what he did was wrong and how it hurt Dick and why Dick feels the way he does about it....thus allowing everyone to get on the same page via the resolving actions of the one party who ACTUALLY had the most to do with setting this particular conflict in motion in the first place.

Anything less will always read like a half measure IMO because like....the conflict began with Bruce and what he did.

It should end with Bruce and what he does too.

[jeks-tgs]

For what it's worth I'd love to read anything you write for ur A/B/O AU! I really agree w ur view on it and finding fics that have that concept that world-build rather than JUST being raunchy & fetish-y is so rare.

I'm finally answering this it's been so long I'm so sorry BUT!! Firstly, thank you, it means alot to me! Secondly, would some backstory exposition count as writing for my ABO AU? /j

Content Warning: Discussions of non-con, trafficking, dog-fighting (but with humans), abuse (physical and sexual), child abuse, and pedophilia. This is a very dark AU that tackles alot of heavy topics, with the main themes being about trauma, mental health, discrimination, and consent. Please don't read anything under the tags 'Jeks ABO AU' or 'Two Makes A Mischief AU' if darker stories could possibly harm you. Stay safe.

So, for my AU I wanted to tackle a lot of heavier topics, and part of that is shown in Jekyll and Hyde's backstory. See, having Jekyll have so many secrets in this AU already, throwing Hyde on top of it all seemed too much. Instead, I made them close friends with a shared traumatic childhood. They were both born in a brothel/fighting ring in Glasgow, belonging to the company The Red Rat. Part of the business revolves around the trafficking and breeding of Omegas, for pleasure, and Betas, for entertainment.

Hyde was bred in the fighting litters, born to a Beta mother and Beta father. He was the runt of his litter, and surprisingly an Omega, but his rough characteristics and personality kept him in the rings rather than being brought to the brothel segment of the building. He quickly gained infamy amongst those who bet on the fights for his temper and ability to survive in the rings. He was referred to as 'Red' due to how bloodied his throat often got during matches.

Jekyll was born to an Omega mother and Alpha father, one of the rich men from London who frequently visited the brothel and paid extra in order to actually sire a litter. Jekyll was the only Omega in the litter, and was seperated from his mother shortly after, being cared for by the Spider's, the owner of the Red Rat, Beta staff. Most often, the Red Rat held the policy that an Omega was off limits until their first heat, but Spider saw Henry as 'the perfect Omega' since he matched Spider's personal prefences, and Spider abused him when he was very young. He was given the derogatory name 'Easy' because he 'didn't put up much of a fight'.

The two met when Hyde managed to sneak into the brothel in an attempt to get actual food rather than moldy scraps, and ran into Jekyll, trying to get some food as well. The two continued to meet in secret, becoming close friends. One day, during one of their meetings, a rival brothel company/gang broke in. During the chaos that ensued, Hyde grabbed Jekyll and made a break for it. The two proceeded to live as street urchins for a long time, stealing to survive and hiding their scents as best they could. Hyde managed to pass himself off as a Beta due to his scent being rather earthy, not common in Omegas, but Jekyll's peppermint scent made it so he had to spend most of his time hiding, relying on Hyde to bring him food.

As time went on, Hyde set up a bit of a barter system with some local school children around their age, giving them stolen goodies or fighting their bullies in exchange for learning what they were taught and textbooks, which he then taught to Jekyll. This continued until the school teacher learnt from her students about the odd little boy, and she followed him to where he and Jekyll lived in a broken down pub. She started leaving food and clothes for them, and eventually set a trap feral kitten style to get both boys to her home to take care of them.

She, being an Omega herself, understood how hard it was for both of them, and helped as best she could to cover Jekyll's scent better, actually using a peppermint cologne to make his scent seem false. While Jekyll took her last name eventually, Hyde chose his own last name, partially because he didn't want the Omega who'd raised them to be connected to him legally in case he got arrested, but also because he and Jekyll had a pretty strong 'we're not dating but yeah we are' kinda relationship at that point and neither wanted to be adopted siblings because gross. (Though both did accept the first names she gave them to replace their Rat-given names.)

Hyde's time in the rings had left him not knowing how to interact with others, being more prone to lashing out when feeling threatened. Hyde suffers from reactive aggression, which is an actual diagnosis in humans, as I've recently found out, though more commonly you might hear it being used for reactive dogs. Jekyll, on the other hand, has a made up disorder called Feral Omega Disorder, as well as Sporatic Heat Syndrome. His years of physical and sexual abuse, especially before his first heat, has left his 'Omega state' (one's Status-driven mindset, influenced by instinct over logic) more 'feral' and animalistic in nature, and his body suffers from sporatic, intense heats spaced farther apart rather than regular, normal heats.

Jekyll and Hyde both went to the same college in London under the guise of being Betas, though much to their distress Jekyll was roomed with an Alpha, Robert Lanyon. The two became close friends though, and after graduating formed the Society, with Hyde working alongside Jekyll as his personal assistant. Sadly, during college Jekyll had become involved an abusive Alpha named Morcant, would one day vanish on a 'business trip', only to return nine months later at Hyde's house in the dead of night, shaking and terrified and holding four little pups in his arms, which is where the actual story begins.

#tgs #tgs au #the glass scientists #jeks abo au #two makes a mischief au #the title is because they both come from the red rat and a group of rats is called a mischief #this does mainly center around Jekyll and Hyde being an Omega/Omega couple raising kids but there's some Robert poly trio too #I originally intended Robert to have Active Alpha Aggression Syndrome but I'm kinda thinking maybe not because #characterizing a black man as aggressive is... not the best thing and also not my intention #I'll likely have to either go into a lot of detail about what AAA Syndrome is and does in the story or scrap it all together #omegaverse #alpha beta omega #abo #Mod Jeks #Jeks do a answer

[bakubabes-tatakae]

For The Love Of Humanity’s Strongest (Part Ten)

Author’s Note: If anyone wants to be in a taglist for this feel free to let me know! Happy to do it for anyone!

(Levi Ackerman x Reader)

Summary: When all seems lost Y/N knows that she can count on one person to always be there for her brother, Eren Jaeger, and herself. Can humanity’s strongest not only keep Eren in line, but keep his relationship alive as well?

Series Masterlist

Word Count: 2.1k

Part Ten

Levi leaned against the wall of the stairwell, all of our nerves were shot from the events of the day. It had been a long time since I had drawn a sword on a member of my squad. The last time had been when Oluo had been hitting on me. I sat on the stairs next to Eren and placed a hand on the back of his neck. The look of defeat on his face was making me nervous. He cleared his throat as he looked over at Levi. “That was quite the wake-up call.” He sighed. “Until their blades were drawn I had no idea how little they trusted me.”

Levi looked forward, never once glancing at either of us. “And what do you expect? A suspicious nature was top of my criteria.” I hated how calm and collected he had always sounded. Levi was so much better at hiding his emotions than I was. “Traditionally you’re not considered a real Scout until you come back alive, but out there there’s always so little intel to go on. So many uncertainties and unknowns that it’s a miracle any of us come back alive.”

Just Levi’s words were making me anxious. “Levi, stop.”

He looked over at me with serious eyes. “He needs to hear this.” He turned to Eren and leaned onto his shoulder against the wall. “You have to be reactive, quick, hit the ground running while anticipating the worst.” He turned away again, crossing his arms. “It doesn’t make them heartless tho, they’re not just a bunch of mindless machines. Whatever that might have looked like out there today I can promise you that every single one of them was conflicted.”

I scoffed. “Sure looked like they were to me.” The sarcasm on my voice was something I knew would piss him off.

“They’re your squadmates Y/n. Do you really think that they would want to have to do something like that?”

I swallowed hard and kept my mouth shut. Arguing with Levi wasn’t something that I wanted to do on one of our last nights home. Another scout came down the stairs as we all sat in silence. “Captain Levi. Section Commander Hange would like a word, Sir.”

Levi nodded to him and Eren and I stood. Levi looked to Eren. “Go on ahead. Tell Hange I’ll be there in a minute.” Eren nodded and walked away, leaving Levi and I standing by ourselves. My nauseous feelings came over me again, it had been on an off all day, but even more so when stressful situations came around. “Are you alright?”

I crossed my arms and tried to make myself look fine. “Don’t worry about me Levi. I’m fine. Just stressed.”

The look on his face told me that he wasn’t buying it. “If there’s something wrong you’re not going on this mission. You know that’s what I’ll tell you, so don’t hide it from me if there is. I need a team that’s going to be objective out there. I can’t have anything happen to any of you.” He stepped forward and cupped my face into his hands. “Especially you Y/n. If something happened to you…”

“Like I said,” I gave him the most convincing smile that I could. “I’m fine. Don’t stress yourself out because of me. It’s just been a long day. I’m only tired.”

Levi wrapped an arm around my shoulders and pulled me into him, kissing the side of my temple. “I love you, you know that?”

A weak smile painted my face. “I know. I love you too, Levi.”

* * * * * * 

As we entered the dining room of the Scout’s headquarters we saw everyone waiting for us. Levi taunted Hange. “Man, how long of a shit were you taking anyway?”

Zoe had always given it back to him. She had no fear when it came to Levi Ackerman. “Oh, long enough to get the job done. Thanks for asking.” Zoe grabbed me when I reached her and pulled me into her arm. “You alright babe?”

I smiled at her. “I’m fine Zoe.”

She took the napkin that she balled up in her hand and placed it on the table. “Feast your eyes on this.” She opened the napkin and stared at us all. 

Eren spoke before anyone. “That’s the spoon from earlier, right?”

“The very one. Your spontaneous Titan arm erupted into being while holding it.” She picked the spoon up. “It was resting between the thumb and index finger. The world operates on chance so coincidences are expected.”

I stepped back and let Hange do her thing as I felt Levi’s hands touch my waist as he came up behind me.

“But this means something more. The spoon wasn’t warped by the heat or by the pressure. Any thoughts on the matter?” She looked around at the group. 

Eren was more confused now than he had been about the whole thing. “All I know is that I went to pick it up. When I did the arm came out of nowhere.”

Hange stared into the spoon. “Interesting. This must be why you couldn’t change in the well. I’m certain of it.” The realization was starting to hit all of us as she spoke. “Slaying Titan’s, blocking canon fire, lifting big rocks, in each instance before assuming Titan form seemingly at will there was a distinct goal in mind.” She placed the spoon back down. “I’ve come to realize that it seems that causing harm isn’t the only means for transformation. It appears that a clear objective is a crucial ingredient as well.”

Eren held his hands and looked at his bite marks. “I think you might be onto something. This last time was a lot like the time with the cannonball. But I… I transformed into a Titan just to pick up a damn spoon?” Eren’s nerves were getting to him as his voice shook. “That’s insane.”

Gunther looked over at Eren. “So what I’m getting out of this is that what you pulled earlier wasn’t something you did on purpose?”

Eren wasn’t sure how to respond, but he stayed calm. “No, sir.”

Gunther sighed and looked around at the rest of the squad. They all nodded to each other and Hange and I gasped as we looked around. Each of them held their hand up and sunk their teeth into them. We had expected all of us to be crushed by the building, but Levi stood calm. Eren looked just as freaked out as we were. I raised my voice as I panicked on them all. “What the hell are you doing?”

Eld rubbed his hand where he had just bit himself. “Alright, that hurts like a son of a bitch. Damn kid,” He looked to Eren. “I’m surprised you can sink your teeth in that deep without shrieking.”

Gunther smiled at him. “We made a judgment call today and it was wrong. Consider this our way of apologizing.” He looked between both Eren and I. “That is if you guys can find it in your hearts to forgive us.”

The whole team was giving praise and apologizing. Oluo’s shouting as he spoke echoed through the room. “We have to make spur of the moment decisions okay? Make the best call we can with what we know. It’s our job to keep you in check.”

My heart was full as I listened to their words. I had wanted nothing more than to hear them all like this. I wanted them to acknowledge that Eren wasn’t a monster. That Eren was a person.

Petra looked over at me before quickly changing her vision to my brother. “The fact is we were scared. That’s no excuse. I know. You both have every right to be upset. Especially you Eren. But, all that aside, we’re doomed if we can’t trust one another, just as you are if you can’t trust us Eren.” They all watched the two of us. “Eren, Y/n, I’m asking you. Do you guys trust us?”

Eren smiled a large smile. “I trust you guys. Thank you.”

My answer was reluctant as I squeezed Eren’s shoulder a little harder than I had meant to. These people were my squad. They were my family. I had to trust them. I had to be there to support them just like they were there to support me. “I trust you.”

Erwin came in the door behind all of us and we all turned to see him, saluting him with a fist to our hearts. “Commander.” We all spoke together.

“At ease soldiers.” He walked forward. “Eren, there are some people I want you to see. Y/n, why don’t you come with us.”

We both nodded and Levi kissed the back of my head as I walked away, whispering softly. “I love you.” 

The hallways of headquarters felt long as we looked between each other, trying desperately to figure out who Erwin could possibly want us to see. But as we turned the corner the familiar faces shone out. Mikasa and Armin. They dawned the green cloaks just as we did and the man standing next to them watched me with curious eyes. 

Eren’s entire face lit up as he saw his friends. I stood back with Erwin for a second as Eren ran for them. “Thank you for doing this Erwin.” I smiled at him, knowing exactly how happy this moment would make Eren after the day that we had. “I really appreciate it.”

Erwin placed his hand on my head. “You’re family Y/n, which means Eren is too. We’re going to figure this out. He’ll be safe. I promise you that.” He nodded forward. “Now go see them. I know they’re like family to you as well.”

I walked forward and stood next to Eren, watching the new newcomers that I had known for years before grabbing Mikasa and pulling her into my arms. “Don’t be shy around here, trust me, it’s not worth it. No one in the Scouts is shy.”

Mikasa wrapped her arms around me. “It’s nice to see you.” 

“It’s nice to see you, too. I told you I’d take care of him, didn’t I?” I held her out at arm’s length. “I promised my mom that I’d protect the two fo you and that’s exactly what I’m going to do.”

Armin smiled at me as he greeted me. “Y/n, it’s so nice to see that the two of you are doing well.” He looked to the boy beside him. “This is Jean Kirstein. He was in our cadet class with us.” He motioned a hand toward me. “Jean, this is Y/n Jeager. She’s Eren’s older sister. She’s been in the Scouts for a little while now.”

Jean held a hand out to me and a sly look on his face. “It sure is nice to meet you.” 

I chuckled a little at the flirtation on his voice, but grasped his hand and shook it.

Mikasa cleared her throat. “And she’s been dating  Humanity’s Strongest Soldier for a long time now, so you might want to cool the flirtation unless you want to be ripped apart by Captain Levi.”

Jean stepped back some. “I’m so sorry! I had no idea.”

Eren’s protective brother look was back as he scolded Jean. “What makes you think that it’s okay to hit on my sister anyway!”

Jean gritted his teeth. “I wasn’t you idiot. Shut up.”

Eren leaned forward until their foreheads almost touched. “I’m not an idiot, horse face.”

I placed my hand behind my head and scratched nervously. “Is this normal?”

Armin placed his hand over his face and slid it down slowly. “This is very normal for these two.”

As the two of them stared daggers at each other, neither one of them wanting to back down I looked behind me to see Levi watching us. I beamed at him and he nodded back with a small smile. Just the feeling of being able to be back with my family making all of the stress of the day seem to just melt away. I couldn’t help but let another laugh escape my lip as I wrapped an arm around Armin, the boy I had considered a brother since they were little, into my arm, and placed a hand on top of his head. I could get used to having the three of them around constantly again.

A/N: Feel free to come and talk to me about the story ! I’m happy to talk about it. Tell me what you thought about the newest part, tell me what you thought about past parts, tell me when you want to see in the future! 😊 Come and talk about it. 

Taglist 💕@gamegirl23100​ @super-peace-fangirl​ @pjimochi​ @izzythefanfreak​ @echimozart​ @peachymochimochi​ @primusk​ @hunie-hun @absolute-randomness-forever​ @omg-lexiiloveyou @dazaismaniaclaugh​ @renaissance-tragedy​ @titaniabuck @always394patronus​ @yeoulkim​ @thefirelordm​ @inmyouwnthoughtss @hihiq​ @affection-rabbit​ @spicythin​ @vintagehowell​ @artist-bby​ @hallothankmas​ @jisungsquirrelhabits​

If I missed anyone in the taglist please let me know! I tried to go through and find everyone since it’s been so long since I’ve done a new part. I will gladly add you! 🥺❤

#levi ackerman x reader #levi x reader #for the love of humanitys strongeset #levi ackerman #attack on titan x reader #levi ackerman imagines #levi ackerman fanfic #levi ackerman fanfiction #levi imagines #levi fanfic #levi fanfiction #attack on titan imagines #attack on titan fanfic #attack on titan fanfiction #shingeki no kyojin x reader #shingeki no kyojin imagines #shingeki no kyojin fanfic #shingeki no kyojin fanfiction #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin

[pp-research]

7 habits of highly effective People summary

about the book:

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey is a self-improvement book. It is written on Covey's belief that the way we see the world is entirely based on our own perceptions. In order to change a given situation, we must change ourselves, and in order to change ourselves, we must be able to change our perceptions.

We all want to succeed. And one path to success is identifying the habits that can help us on our journey.

I recommend starting that path by reading Stephen Covey's best-selling book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Don't have time to read all 432 pages?

I get it most of us don't. That's why we summarized the entire book for you below.

7 habits of highly effective People

1. Be Proactive

2. Begin with the End in Mind

3. Put First Things First

4. Think Win-Win

5. Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood

6. Synergize

7. Sharpen the Saw

Habits 1, 2, and 3 are focused on self-mastery and moving from dependence to independence.

Habits 4, 5, and 6 are focused on developing teamwork, collaboration, and communication skills, and moving from independence to interdependence.

Habit 7 is focused on continuous growth and improvement and embodies all the other habits.

1. Be Proactive

We're in charge. We choose the scripts by which to live our lives. Use this self-awareness to be proactive and take responsibility for your choices.

The first habit that Covey discusses is being proactive. What distinguishes us as humans from all other animals is our inherent ability to examine our own character, to decide how to view ourselves and our situations, and to control our own effectiveness.

Put simply, in order to be effective one must be proactive.

Reactive people take a passive stance -- they believe the world is happening to them. They say things like:

"There's nothing I can do."

"That's just the way I am."

They think the problem is "out there" -- but that thought is the problem. Reactivity becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, and reactive people feel increasingly victimized and out of control.

Proactive people, however, recognize they have responsibility -- or "response-ability," which Covey defines as the ability to choose how you will respond to a given stimulus or situation.

Key Lessons:

Challenge yourself to test the principle of proactivity by doing the following:

1. Start replacing reactive language with proactive language.

Reactive = "He makes me so mad."

Proactive = "I control my own feelings."

2. Convert reactive tasks into proactive ones.

2. Begin with the End in Mind

Start with a clear destination in mind. Covey says we can use our imagination to develop a vision of what we want to become and use our conscience to decide what values will guide us.

Most of us find it rather easy to busy ourselves. We work hard to achieve victories -- promotions, higher income, more recognition. But we don't often stop to evaluate the meaning behind this business, behind these victories -- we don't ask ourselves if these things that we focus on so intently are what really matter to us.

Habit 2 suggests that, in everything we do, we should begin with the end in mind. Start with a clear destination. That way, we can make sure the steps we're taking are in the right direction.

Covey emphasizes that our self-awareness empowers us to shape our own lives, instead of living our lives by default or based on the standards or preferences of others.

Beginning with the end in mind is also extremely important for businesses. Being a manager is about optimizing for efficiency. But being a leader is about setting the right strategic vision for your organisation in the first place, and asking, "What are we trying to accomplish?"

Key Lessons:

Challenge yourself to test the principle of beginning with the end in mind by doing the following:

1. Visualize in rich detail your own funeral. Who is there? What are they saying about you? About how you lived your life? About the relationships you had? What do you want them to say? Think about how your priorities would change if you only had 30 more days to live. Start living by these priorities.

2. Break down different roles in your life -- whether professional, personal, or community -- and list three to five goals you want to achieve for each.

3. Define what scares you. Public speaking? Critical feedback after writing a book? Write down the worst-case scenario for your biggest fear, then visualize how you'll handle this situation. Write down exactly how you'll handle it.

3. Put First Things First

In order to manage ourselves effectively, we must put first things first. We must have the discipline to prioritize our day-to-day actions based on what is most important, not what is most urgent.

In Habit 2, we discussed the importance of determining our values and understanding what it is we are setting out to achieve. Habit 3 is about actually going after these goals, and executing on our priorities on a day-to-day, moment-to-moment basis.

In order to maintain the discipline and the focus to stay on track toward our goals, we need to have the willpower to do something when we don't want to do it. We need to act according to our values rather than our desires or impulses at any given moment.

"Think effectiveness with people and efficiency with things." -Stephen Covey

1. Create your own time management matrix to start prioritizing.

2. Estimate how much time you spend in each quadrant. Then log your time over 3 days. How accurate was your estimate? How much time did you spend in Quadrant II (the most important quadrant)?

4. Think Win-Win

Covey explains that there are six paradigms of human interaction:

1. Win-Win: Both people win. Agreements or solutions are mutually beneficial and satisfying to both parties.

2. Win-Lose: "If I win, you lose." Win-Lose people are prone to use position, power, credentials, and personality to get their way.

3. Lose-Win: "I lose, you win." Lose-Win people are quick to please and appease, and seek strength from popularity or acceptance.

4. Lose-Lose: Both people lose. When two Win-Lose people get together -- that is, when two, determined, stubborn, ego-invested individuals interact -- the result will be Lose-Lose.

5. Win: People with the Win mentality don't necessarily want someone else to lose -- that's irrelevant. What matters is that they get what they want.

6. Win-Win or No Deal: If you can't reach an agreement that is mutually beneficial, there is no deal.

The best option is to create Win-Win situations. With Win-Lose, or Lose-Win, one person appears to get what he wants for the moment, but the results will negatively impact the relationship between those two people going forward.

The Win-Win or No Deal option is important to use as a backup. When we have No Deal as an option in our mind, it liberates us from needing to manipulate people and push our own agenda. We can be open and really try to understand the underlying issues.

"To go for Win-Win, you not only have to be nice, you have to be courageous." -Stephen Covey

Key Lessons:

Get yourself to start thinking Win-Win with these challenges:

1. Think about an upcoming interaction where you'll be attempting to reach an agreement or solution. Write down a list of what the other person is looking for. Next, write a list next to that of how you can make an offer to meet those needs.

2. Identify three important relationships in your life. Think about what you feel the balance is in each of those relationships. Do you give more than you take? Take more than you give? Write down 10 ways to always give more than you take with each one.

3. Deeply consider your own interaction tendencies. Are they Win-Lose? How does that affect your interactions with others? Can you identify the source of that approach? Determine whether or not this approach serves you well in your relationships. Write all of this down.

5. Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood

Before we can offer advice, suggest solutions, or effectively interact with another person in any way, we must seek to deeply understand them and their perspective through empathic listening.

Let's say you go to an optometrist and tell him that you've been having trouble seeing clearly, and he takes off his glasses, hands them to you and says, "Here, try these -- they've been working for me for years!" You put them on, but they only make the problem worse. What are the chances you'd go back to that optometrist?

Unfortunately, we do the same thing in our everyday interactions with others. We prescribe a solution before we diagnose the problem. We don't seek to deeply understand the problem first.

Habit 5 says that we must seek first to understand, then to be understood. In order to seek to understand, we must learn to listen.

"You have to build the skills of empathic listening on a base of character that inspires openness and trust." -Stephen Covey

Key Lessons:

Here are a few ways to get yourself in the habit of seeking first to understand:

1. Next time you're watching two people communicating, cover your ears and watch. What emotions are being communicated that might not come across through words alone? Was one person or the other more interested in the conversation? Write down what you noticed.

3. Next time you give a presentation, root it in empathy. Begin by describing the audience's point of view in great detail. What problems are they facing? How is what you're about to say offering a solution to their problems?

6. Synergize

By understanding and valuing the differences in another person's perspective, we have the opportunity to create synergy, which allows us to uncover new possibilities through openness and creativity.

The combination of all the other habits prepares us for Habit 6, which is the habit of synergy or "When one plus one equals three or more and the whole is great than the sum of its parts."

For example, if you plant two plants close together, their roots will co-mingle and improve the quality of the soil, so that both plants will grow better than they would on their own.

Synergy allows us to create new alternatives and open new possibilities. It allows us as a group to collectively agree to ditch the old scripts and write new ones.

"Without doubt, you have to leave the comfort zone of base camp and confront an entirely new and unknown wilderness." -Stephen Covey

Key Lessons:

1. Make a list of people who irritate you. Now choose just one person. How are their views different? Put yourself in their shoes for one minute. Think and pretend how it feels to be them. Does this help you understand them better?

Now next time you're in a disagreement with that person, try to understand their concerns and why they disagree with you. The better you can understand them, the easier it will be to change their mind -- or change yours.

2. Make a list of people with whom you get along well. Now choose just one person. How are their views different? Now write down a situation where you had excellent teamwork and synergy. Why? What conditions were met to reach such fluidity in your interactions? How can you recreate those conditions again?

7. Sharpen the Saw

To be effective, we must devote the time to renewing ourselves physically, spiritually, mentally, and socially. Continuous renewal allows us to synergistically increase our ability to practice each habit.

Habit 7 is focused around renewal, or taking time to "sharpen the saw." It surrounds all of the other habits and makes each one possible by preserving and enhancing your greatest asset -- yourself.

There are four dimensions of our nature, and each must be exercised regularly, and in balanced ways:

Physical Dimension: The goal of continuous physical improvement is to exercise our body in a way that will enhance our capacity to work, adapt, and enjoy.

To renew ourselves physically, we must:

i. Eat well

ii. Get sufficient rest and relaxation

iii. Exercise on a regular basis to build endurance, flexibility, and strength

Focusing on the physical dimension helps develop Habit 1 muscles of proactivity. We act based on the value of well-being instead of reacting to the forces that keep us from fitness.

Spiritual Dimension: The goal of renewing our spiritual self is to provide leadership to our life and reinforce your commitment to our value system.

To renew yourself spiritually, you can:

i. Practice daily meditation

ii. Communicate with nature

iii. Immerse yourself in great literature or music

A focus on our spiritual dimension helps us practice Habit 2, as we continuously revise and commit ourselves to our values, so we can begin with the end in mind.

Mental Dimension: The goal of renewing our mental health is to continue expanding our mind.

To renew yourself mentally, you can:

i. Read good literature

ii. Keep a journal of your thoughts, experiences,

and insights

iii. Limit television watching to only those programs that enrich your life and mind

Focusing on our mental dimension helps us practice Habit 3 by managing ourselves effectively to maximize the use of our time and resources.

Social/Emotional Dimension: The goal of renewing ourselves socially is to develop meaningful relationships.

To renew yourself emotionally, you can:

i. Seek to deeply understand other people

ii. Make contributions to meaningful projects that improve the lives of others

iii. Maintain an Abundance Mentality, and seek to help others find success

Renewing our social and emotional dimension helps us practice Habits 4, 5, and 6 by recognizing that Win-Win solutions do exist, seeking to understand others, and finding mutually beneficial third alternatives through synergy.

"Not a day goes by that we can't at least serve one other human being by making deposits of unconditional love." -Stephen Covey

Key Lessons:

1. Make a list of activities that would help you renew yourself along each of the 4 dimensions. Select one activity for each dimension and list it as a goal for the coming week. At the end of the week, evaluate your performance. What led you to succeed or fail to accomplish each goal?

2. Commit to writing down a specific "sharpen the saw" activity in all four dimensions every week, to do them, and to evaluate your performance and results.

Hope you find some value from this article and don't forget it - read , learn and implement

[aperrywilliams]

A Normal Conversation Ch16 (Spencer Reid x Maxine Brenner)

(Not my gif!)

Masterlist

Ch01 Ch02 Ch03 Ch04 Ch05 Ch06 Ch07 Ch08 Ch09 Ch10 Ch11 Ch12 Ch13 Ch14 Ch15

———————

Summary: Spencer and Max couldn't see each other in eight days. Time passed slow until they could finally meet again.

Word Count: 4858

Rating: Mature. Fluff. Smut.

Warnings: Penetrative sex, cursing. Reference to sex in public place. Reference to failed/toxic relationships.

A/N: My babies are growing up in their relationship. I’m so proud. Well, this story has some things more before and after S15x10. But I think in that time I will finished it. If you, faithful readers want to see some specific stuff, let me know!

——————–

 Chapter 16: Cinema night

It wasn’t 2 days were 8 days team were stuck with the Houston case. The local police were not very cooperative and that complicated things. Despite the obstacles, there were arrests and no more deaths as could have happened. Around 4 in the afternoon they were landing in DC. They would make a short stop at the BAU and then home. It was Friday, so at least they wouldn't have to come back, they hoped, until Monday.

On the way to his apartment, Spencer texted Max. "I’m in DC. On my way to my place. Can we meet? We can go out. Cinema perhaps?” Max was leaving school when she got the message from Spencer. After reading it she replied. "I’m glad you're here! I’m leaving school. I like cinema. Are we meeting there?” They agreed to meet at the cinema to see a re-run of a thriller at 8:00 p.m.

Spencer was the first to arrive. He was waiting outside the cinema. It was not a cold night despite being early October. The weather was strange and difficult to predict at this time of year. Spencer had decided not to wear his coat and was sure he had made a good decision. With hands in his pockets, he looked among the people to see if Max was approaching from one side of the street. At one point he looked straight ahead and saw Max running to where he was. She had already seen him, so she didn’t wait for the light signal and benefit of the fact the vehicles were stopped to cross the street.

“That is quite reckless of you. You should have waited for the light signal…”.  Spencer told her when she was already on his side of the street.

"Sorry. I’m so sorry. I was almost late. I wasn't going to wait… the signal… if all the cars were… stopped…” Max said trying to catch her breath. Spencer shook his head and winced.

"Are you ok?" he asked when he saw she was still breathing heavily.

"Yes, I only ran two blocks... but I'm fine" said Max, catching her breath.

"It looks like it would have been a marathon" said Spencer laughing.

"Don't make fun of me... my physical condition is not that good after all..."

"But you're already here. So it’s ok. Not big deal if we are a little late…”

"Spencer ... don't try to fool me. You hate being late for something” said Max.

"True. But seriously, it's not a significant thing ..." he said trying to reassure her.

"Okay. Better let's go. I can walk again”. Max said laughing as she start walking to the entrance. Spencer without moving from his place, he only took hands out of his pockets and with one he took one of Max's wrists who couldn't continue walking. "Spencer?" Max asked when she realized can’t move.

"I can't believe how disrespectful you are". Spencer said seriously.

"Excuse me?..." With the hand held Max's wrist, he pulled her toward him, causing her hands to rest on his chest as she looked up.

"You haven't even greeted me. We haven't seen each other in eight days and not even a 'hello'?…”. Spencer reproached. Max couldn't help but laugh as she realized Spencer angry’ s face was the same as a 10-year-old boy.

"I thought we were late...". Max couldn't finish speaking because her lips already had Spencer's on them. An intense kiss that reminded them of the days they hadn't seen each other. Max wanted to make up for her discourtesy and wrapping her arms around Spencer's neck tried to make the kiss last as long as possible. When they both needed to catch their breath, they pulled back just a little, supporting their foreheads and still hugging each other.

"Much better". Spencer said, giving Max a smile.

"Spencer, you don't know how much I missed you these days"

"Me too. And so you didn't want to greet me properly…”

"I thought you were unfavorable to public demonstrations..."

"True. But let's say there is not much public now" said Spencer chuckling.

Indeed, since all the people gathered outside the cinema had made their entrance before the movie time, so you could only see those who were moving from one place to another and who didn’t care what was happening in the theater entrance. Max was released for Spencer grip and took his hand to move into the cinema.

The movie had already started, so they walked down the dark hallway looking for seats at the top of the room. They sat quietly without releasing their hands. Max tried to focus on the movie. Spencer for his part could not stop looking at her especially in the moments when the lights of the film illuminated her face. He tried to focus on the movie, but couldn't help but release his hand to hug Max and draw her to him. He was grateful the seats in the room allowed the armrests could to be removed.

With her body close, every so often Reid buried his nose in Max hair, while his hand caressed her shoulder. Max was also quickly distracted. Feeling his body close was too pleasant a sensation to ignore. Halfway through the movie she gave up and didn't want to keep trying to pay attention. She raised her face to look at him and realized his eyes were fixed on her. She couldn't help but smile. With her hand took the collar of Reid shirt to attract him more. Without thinking twice, Spencer leaned in close enough for their lips to meet. Between the darkness of the cinema and the desire not to separate, they continued kissing boldly for a long time. Their lips parted only to kiss other parts of their respective faces, the chin, cheeks, neck, and lob ears.

"I see you're not very interested in the movie...". Spencer whispered in her ear.

"You are not either..."

"True. I can't help it…” he said as kissed her chin. Without meaning to, Max let out a groan. One of Reid's hands caressed her thighs while the other held Max head to keep her from pulling away. They were still passionately kissing.

 "Have you ever done it in a movie theater?". Max whispered in his ear. Spencer's pupils widened upon hearing her.

"Done…? No… are you suggesting…?” Reid's voice grew more nervous but wanting.

"Believe me I would love to be this bold this minute... but I'd rather hold on until I have you in my bed and enjoy it better..." she whispered close to his ear. Spencer didn't know if that helped him more, because thinking about what they could be doing made him more eager than 30 seconds ago.

"It'll only be... 43 more minutes..." Spencer said, glancing at his watch.

"I guess you're counting the ride..."

"Of course I did…"

"Excellent".

When the film credits began to appear, they both got up to leave the theater. Spencer had his hands on Max's hips and didn't separate from them until they completely exited the theater and made it to where he had parked his car. Max leaned against the car on the passenger side, wrapping his arms around Spencer to pull him closer. He couldn't help but sink his mouth into her neck.

"Your place or mine?" Max asked in a whisper.

"Wherever you want... but don't tell me in the car, because it would be awkward and a little exhibitionist on our part". Max couldn't help but laugh.

"How you dare Dr. Reid!. We can leave that for another time. Okay, let's go to my place”. They managed to separate and each quickly got into the vehicle.

They both was laughing nervously along the trip. They looked furtively without saying anything. When they had to stop at a red light, Spencer snorted with anxiety. Max laughed as she noticed how Spencer was gripping the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles turned white. Not wanting to relieve him, on the contrary, every now and then she placed her hand on his leg, making his body tense on contact. In revenge, from time to time Reid did the same: he put his long fingers on Max's thigh. She surprised herself at how reactive she felt at his touch. They managed to get to the building after parking the car. They both went down and entered the building. Again Spencer's hands didn't come off Max's hips. They got into the elevator and as the doors closed Max couldn't take it anymore and surrounding Spencer's neck she began to kiss him in the most passionate and urgent way she could express.

"I think we should get to the apartment first". Spencer said as he buried his mouth on Max's neck.

"I don't know if I can take it...". Max said whispering in his ear. Her tone only made him shudder.

"Don't say that... I'm about to stop the elevator...". Spencer said pressing her closer to his body.

"Just one more floor...". Max said as Reid searched her lips even more urgently. The doors opened, almost without taking off they left the elevator to Max's apartment.

"And a hallway...". Spencer said as Max tugged on his tie until they reached the door.

"We are... here... wait a minute... damn keys!...". Max tried to open the door, but since her concentration was elsewhere, the task became more complex.

"Let me help..." Spencer said taking the keys and trying to open the door. Max was just concentrating on untying his tie. After one more try, he managed to turn the handle and open the door.

They finally managed to come into the apartment and Max jumped into the Spencer’s arms who held her while she hung on his neck and they found their needy mouths again. Spencer pushed her with the same weight against the door to close it. Max just let out a gasp in Spencer's mouth. She stood back just a second to speak.

"Room, now..." Max instructed.

"Immediately…". Without releasing her, he led her directly to the bedroom. Max slipped off Spencer's neck only to start helping him take off his clothes. He while doing the same with her. As they pulled the garments off their bodies they couldn't help but laugh and sigh at the same time. With no more clothes to peel off, they lay down on the bed to tangle themselves with their own arms that sought to caress everything they could from the other. The urgency of their kisses and caresses was not an impediment for them to be able to extend the foreplay as much as possible, which exponentially increased their excitement.

 "Spencer... you don't know how I missed you these days...". Max sighed.

"Me too... I... I only thought about you... I thought about how it felt to be kissing you... touching your body... feeling you...". As Reid released those words, he managed to stamping kisses all over her body.

"I think... we should have skipped... the movie...". Max said with a nervous laugh.

"Late for that... now let's make up for time..."

It wasn't long before they were moving together in the same rhythm, letting out groaning and their own names. They kept looking at each other, despite the fact that with the passing of the minutes it was made more difficult by the electrifying waves of pleasure circulated through their bodies from head to toe. Spencer smirked as Max arched her back and pressed fingers and nails to his skin.

He felt sweat running down his forehead and face, but that was irrelevant, he just wanted to intensify the sensation of feeling her and hearing her moan saying his name. That was all mattered at the time. He needed to please her with everything he could, to show her how ecstatic she made him feel. Max, for her part, was lost in her own pleasure and how that man was managing to push her to the limit. Without sounding like an experienced lover, he knew exactly what to do to make her lose control. Reid had a precise rhythm and very skillful hands. With the right incentive, the two things could be combined very well, and Max was discovering it with the best delight she ever thought she had.

"Fuck Spencer... Oh yeah, baby, right there. More please… Spencer, harder…”

"Max, you feel so good. Do you like it?, tell me… I want to hear you… use your words…”

"Harder, faster. Spencer, you are fucking me so good baby. Please don't stop…”

When Max finally let herself be carried away by the impending orgasm that was pounding her body, she could feel her walls tighten and stimulate deeper moans in Spencer. That made her lose herself in her own pleasure that was almost immediately followed by him. When Spencer's spasms subsided, not parting with Max yet, he looked at her for a moment. He focused on her bright eyes, her lips, her chest rising and falling as she tried to regulate her breathing, on her disheveled hair, on her reddened cheeks.

"I could stay like this for a long time, just looking at you..." he said, searching her lips to capture an intense kiss as they both descended from the heights.

"If it wasn't because... you're going to cramp...". Max laughed, causing an involuntary spasm and moan in both reminding them that Spencer was still in her.

Reid pulled away from her and lay down on the side of bed, dropping his condom into the trash can next to the nightstand. Then he rolled onto his back and let out a deep breath. Max reached out to find him hug. She rested her head on his chest and began to caress him gently with her fingers. Spencer stroked Max hair and her bare shoulder. They were silent for a while, as they both calmed their breathing.

“I must say Dr. Reid you have pleasantly surprised me. You have a special talent for the love arts…”. Max said ceremoniously and let out a sigh. Spencer couldn't help but laugh.

"Good way to say sex with me is not that bad after all..." Spencer laughed.

"I didn't say that... I said you pleasantly surprised me, I didn't say I thought you were bad in bed. Don't put words in my mouth!”. Max claimed.

"Okay... I'm going to take your compliment to feed my diminished ego". Spencer said with an open laugh. Max patted his arm reprovingly. They were silent again for a moment. Max spoke again.

"Did I tell you that I love see you laughing?"

"Max... please... you will make me blush..."

"I mean it. I like to see you laughing… relaxed… enjoying the moment”

“Uhm… to tell the truth… this also amazes me. I didn't know I could feel so comfortable at times like these"

"Why you say that?"

"I don’t know. It may sound odd. But intimacy with another person has always seemed like a jump into the abyss and makes me extremely nervous. But… now I feel different… and… I like it” said Spencer while caressing Max's bare arm.

 "Hearing you say that is like my head is saying exactly the same thing... but surely you would not believe me"

"Why should I not believe you?"

"I don’t know. It’s true I had a youth with certain excesses... and I have had several failed relationships... and very disastrous, by the way... but I’m not an extrovert spirit in essence". Max indicated.

"Are you telling me I think you’re a hippie?" Spencer asked laughing.

"Maybe…?"

"No. Your artistic spirit is not hippie style. You don't feel comfortable with that kind of freedom. You need structure in your life. At least the basic one. Although that doesn't stop you from experimenting within your limits…”. Spencer said as he kissed her on the forehead.

"Do you already profiled me?" Max asked curiously.

"No... no, I didn't mean to sound like that... sorry..."

"Yes, you did... come on, I want to hear it. Seriously, it's just real curiosity, it's not to reproach you for something” said Max.

"Do you really want me to tell you?" Spencer was hesitant to keep talking.

"Yes. Maybe I can learn something from myself”. Max said with a shrug.

"High expectations for my work, Miss Brenner ..."

"Just spit it out, buddy". Max said insistently.

"All right. Okay. If you are asking so nicely… It is no surprise you inherited a sensitive artistic side from your mother. You told me yourself. But your father always instilled in you and your sisters the sense of responsibility and plans. Michelle is the one who, due to her age and the things that happened to you over the years, became more operational and practical. Surely she has a structured career in science, such as engineering, or perhaps something more humanistic, but with defined canons, such as laws. You are the middle sister. You told me it was a conflict deciding what to do once you got out of high school. You are the one who has suffered the duality of your parents the most. For years you suppressed your rational side trying to follow your mother. You believed being free was about not setting goals for the future, you believed being free was letting things just happen. But you realized that was not with you either. Despite everything, you needed structure and, above all, plans. A life goal. As you grew up, you realized being with others was also a sense of responsibility for you. Possibly you saw yourself responsible for Eloise when Michelle left home. You’re overprotective with your younger sister as well as with your nephew. Maybe you want to make up for Michelle's void, but you too are naturally a caregiver. Your mother was also, although in a more intuitive and spontaneous way. It’s likely in some of your relationships you saw yourself acting more like a sympathetic mother than a woman who put her demands on the table. When the static overcame the initial impulse of something new and perhaps even forbidden, you no longer made sense to be with someone. At some point you realized you didn’t need anyone to complete yourself or achieve your purposes. You took charge of your life, even though there are times when you long to not have to make decisions… ”. Spencer stopped. Max was silent. With one of his hands, he scratched his forehead. Reid had the feeling he had spoken more than necessary and it had been a mistake. "Max, I'm so sorry... I shouldn't have said all this... clearly you know your life better than I do...". Spencer apologized.

"Wow... I could say you guessed almost everything... I'm amazed. You guys are really good…”. Max said laughing.

"What? Aren't you upset?"

"Of course not. Why should I be? I asked you to tell me what you saw. Only now I’ll have to be more careful with you”. Spencer relaxed and laughed too.

"When I do this outside of work... overall it ends up being a mess". Reid acknowledged.

“I believe you, it’s not easy to hear how you can become an open book for someone else. But, you know what?"

"What…?"

"I think I don't mind being one, as long as you are the only one reading it. Now take this responsibility and keep it a secret, ok?” Max winked him and laid her head on his chest. Spencer smiled as he held her against his body.

"Sure I will..." he replied, then kissed her on the head. They held each other for a while and were silent. They could hear how the street was slowly quieting down.

"Are you hungry? I'm going to make something to eat". Max said in a moment, separating from him to get out of bed.

 "Yes actually. I hadn't noticed we didn't have eat… food” said Spencer grimacing.

"What kind of comment was that Dr. Reid?" Max said looking at him and chuckling while she put on a robe and tied it around her waist.

"I was wondering if there will be dessert later..." said Spencer looking at her from the bed.

"If you behave... there is a possibility" were Max's words before disappearing from the room on the way to the kitchen.

Spencer lay in bed for a while longer. From the bedroom he could hear Max taking things out of the pantry and the refrigerator. He began looking at his surroundings. The bedroom was not very spacious but it had a good distribution. Two night tables, one on each side of the bed. A closet arranged on the right wall of the room while just on the wall behind him was the window overlooked one of the alleys surrounded the building. That helped mitigate the noise from the main street on the opposite side of Max's apartment. There was a dresser on the left wall of the room. Reid could see there were many photographs on it arranged in framed collages. He got out of bed, pulling on her slacks and shirt, which he didn't want to button. Spencer walked to the dresser and peered closely at the photos. Several were from Max and his family. There was a big photo of her mom as well as Sammy when he was a baby. There was a photo of the three sisters for graduation that appeared to be of Michelle. Other photos of Max at the college, as well as others taken in landscapes that seemed to be part of Max's travels in different parts of the country. Looking at the photographs, he smiled. He could see many of the things he liked about her in those photographs: her smile, her energy to do many things, the love for her own family. If anything characterized her in those photos, it was the feeling of confidence and resolution that radiated on her face. That little woman who was able to fill the room without opening her mouth, only with her presence. Without realizing it, Spencer had become more distracted than he thought. When he heard his name from the kitchen, he left his thoughts and left the bedroom.

Max had made sandwiches and tea, which she arranged on the table. There was also a plate with cookies and jam. When she saw Spencer appear from the room she motioned for him to come over and sit down.

"It is not very elaborate, but at least we will not be hungry"

"Tea?"

"Yep ... it's not time for coffee, unless you want to stay up all night"

They sat down to eat. In that minute Spencer realized he was indeed hungry. Without nearly speaking he had already devoured his sandwich and half a cup of tea. Max was looking at him with a smile on her face. Spencer noticed it.

"What?... yes, I was hungry. But you barely touched your sandwich…”

"Yeah, apparently I wasn't too much hungry after all". Max said taking a sip of his tea.

"Max, is something wrong? Was it because of something I said a while ago?..."

"No, I mean… well... I’m am not reproaching any of that. It's just... I don't know. That kept me thinking about what you said about being 'maternal' in my relationships...”

“It doesn't necessarily have to be that way. They are only my appreciations without knowing any concrete fact. It can be completely different Max…”

"It just seems to be a fact. At least in some of the relationships I've had... and especially in the last one...". Max said with a sigh.

"Do you want to talk about it?... If you don't want to, that's fine...". Max winced, not knowing whether to keep talking or stop. After giving a sigh, she chose to continue talking.

Mike Davis. We dated for two years. That was true. It was also true that I focused a lot on our relationship and distanced myself a little from my family and friends. I really wanted it to work. When he asked me to move together, I didn’t hesitate. I moved with him 3 months after we met. That was fast. Come to think of it, I don't know why I was rushing into it so much. I think he wanted to make sure he would have me by his side, maybe that was it. I convinced myself I had to give him a chance. But of course, the only one who did the job’s part was me. Mike was a good guy, but he didn't know anything about what to do with his life. I guess I felt if I was important to him, he would try and if I helped him it might work. But then the discussions started. He was comfortable with me by his side, taking care of him, worrying of him, trying to please him. But what happened to me, or what I felt, was irrelevant to him. When we discussed that, he always told me I had met him like this and it was unfair for me to try to change him. That I was obtuse, that I wanted things my way, that I was selfish. Anyway... I came to believe it. I think that had me two years with him”.

"What made you decide to left him?" Spencer asked as he gripped his mug with both hands.

“Michelle. I mean, she always told me it wasn't worth being with a man like that. But I was in love... and of course, that generated another conflict between us. I hated to admit it, but she was right… again”. Max smiled lowering her gaze. Spencer took her hand and squeezed it gently. Max looked up at him.

"Hey... you got out of there. That's what matters. And you made the decision, and you did it because you realized it was necessary. Regardless of who encouraged you to do it” said Spencer, stroking her hand with his thumb.

"I did it. And it was a relief. I mean... of course, at first it hurt a lot, it was a very painful break. I cried a lot, but now that I think about it… I don't know if it was because I lost him… or because I felt I had failed again…”

"But you did your part... what else could you have done? You tried..."

"Of course I tried. But I didn't want to try any more. So I didn't want to put more effort into a relationship anymore. I was fed up, exhausted. I didn't want to date anyone anymore. Every time one of my friends or sisters placed me in front of a new guy, I did everything necessary to dismiss them immediately. Those poor men sure made all their efforts... but I didn't want to, it's that simple. And of course… if the invitation was for casual sex or one night stand, ok, I could handle it, but only that…”. Max sighed. Then she released Spencer's hand and stood up from the chair taking her and Spencer's mugs. "Do you want more tea?" Spencer shook his head negatively.

"No, I’m fine. Thank you"

"Okay, I'll get this up" Taking the mugs, she led them to the sink.

Max rested both hands on the edge of the sink and lowered her head in silence. Spencer didn't take his eyes off her the entire time. When Reid saw her leaning on her hands trying to stifle a sob, he stood up next to her. Placing his hands on Max shoulders, he made her turn to face him. One of his hands reached for her chin to lift it up and look her in the eye.

"Max, I know you are a strong woman. You don't have to prove it. Neither with me nor with anyone. Crying does not make you less powerful. You don't have to hide it… on the contrary, if that's what you feel, let it out…”. The tears Max was holding back began to flow. "That's it, let them out, you'll feel better later..." said Spencer.

Max buried her face in Reid chest, wrapping her arms around his torso, while he hugged her, caressing her back gently. After the sobs and tears left her body, she began to calm down and breathe calmer. At no point did Spencer stop stroking her so he noticed when her muscles relaxed and the sobs subsided.

"I told you that every time I tried to profile outside of work a disaster would happen" said Spencer, causing the desired effect on Max, who started to laugh.

———————

#spencer reid #maxine brenner #maxcer #spencer reid fanfiction #dr. spencer reid #criminal minds #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid smut

[littlemisskookie]

Spell-tacular

Spell-tacular Ship: Greaser!Yoongi | Witch!Reader Description: Highschool!AU, 50/60′s!AU, Witch!AU, Best Friends to Lovers; Despite living in the same neighborhood and going to the same school since diapers, you were a complete enigma to Yoongi. It wasn’t until you save his life that he realizes exactly what you are- and loves it. Warnings: Established Relationship, Public Sex, Unprotected Sex, Squirting, D/S Undertones, Dom!Yoongi, Pussy Slapping, Ass Eating (both), Blowjob, Face Fucking, Choking, Oral, Themes of Violence, Death, LOTS of Angst, So much fluff you’ll get a cavity Word Count: 22,664 A/N: Sorry I’ve been on Semi-Hiatus for a while! Hopefully, this makes up for it.

Yoongi knew you were different- though good or bad, he wasn't quite sure.

The two of you had lived in the tiny town your entire lives, and though everyone knew everything about everybody, that wasn't the case with you and your family. The group never seemed to venture far our outside of their house, and you were the only one frequently seen, though you stayed to yourself. Yoongi was never sure if that was because you wanted to stay alone, or because the entire town saw you and your people as an aloof freakshow.

Not that they had absolutely no reason to, however.

Your family was constantly seen wearing the weirdest clothes- bold and wild colors rather than the mundane browns that others wore. Most of the women in the suburbs wore heels and elegant dresses that reached knee length, supporting their husbands as they went off to war and heading to the factories. Your mother didn't seem to work in the factories though- but it wasn't as though she spent much time at home. It was the same way for her even during the depression. The few times your mother was seen she had worn combat boots with a purple cape, her face obscured by the hood, but one could tell that her hair had been held in a tight bun. On the few occasions that her face was seen, it was remarked that she had sunken in eyes as well as dark bags, as though the woman hadn't heard of makeup. Even once everyone was able to afford and buy it.

Your father was a more mysterious case. He didn't seem to do combat and join the army forces the way the other men did, but even after, he didn't work at the schools or the factories. He did dress better than your mother, however, though that wasn't a hard task to accomplish. The bow ties and clothing was far out of style, as though he had picked something up from decades before. He had the same dark circles but was somehow prestigious, his beard grown and his glasses perched upon the tip of his nose. He was more approachable, despite being aloof and shrouded with just as much mystery.

The neighborhood pitied their only daughter, having to grow up with such strange parents. You lived in the giant mansion up on the hill, and though it seemed run down, it still was eerily majestic. Many of the neighborhood boys claimed it was haunted by the looks of it, but something told Yoongi it was far deeper than that. He couldn't quite place what was off about it, though.

Yoongi's mother recounted one of the days she was off work and stayed at the daycare with the other moms and toddlers, and though Yoongi was too young to remember the incident, many of the witnesses that day can recall it with the same level of detail and accuracy.

Your mother wasn't interacting with the other women in the room, who would babble on about obscure things and their humdrum lives as their children played. Instead, she kept her eyes on you with a bored expression. It wasn't as though she were hovering over you or giving you that eagle-eye stare- overprotective parents were common. No, it seemed bored, as though she were expecting something.

And true enough, it did.

Out of the blue, the stuffed animal in your hand erupted into flames, fire catching onto it quickly enough. You held onto it, though, unreactive to the screams of the mothers around you, and not at all reactive to the fire.

Your mother, on the other hand, calmly picked it up and dropped it to the floor, stomping on it with her worn out boot until the flames were extinguished. She then sat back in her chair, crossing her arms and wearing the same undazed expression as you picked up the burnt and charred stuffed animal and continued what you were doing.

That wasn't the only time unnatural stuff occurred around you, however. By the time your grade had enrolled in school, there were odd occurrences. Your parents were no longer seen around, and because you lived further on top of the hill, the bus didn't pick you up. Yoongi would wonder how you found so much energy to walk to and from school every day, but you didn't seem to mind that. Maybe you just liked being alone instead of on a bus with rowdy kids who wouldn't want to talk to you anyway.

Throughout elementary school, there would be odd occurrences. In 2nd grade, Jung Eunwoo had made fun of the second-hand dress that was too loose on your body, comparing it to a paper bag. After recess that same day, the water fountain randomly combusted while Eunwoo was taking a drink, and she was soaked from head to toe.

In fifth grade, you were playing dodgeball during P.E., and Yoongi, popular despite how overly stoic he could seem, had picked you first out of kindness, knowing you'd often be picked last. You had seemed surprised by the gesture, busy reading through some thick, dusty textbook, but nevertheless joined. It was during that match that Jeon Jungkook, (an infamous cheater at the game who had given all too many people nosebleeds and tears, one time even cornering a girl and knocking her out with a single blow), had fainted mid-game after cornering you. Apparently, he passed out the moment he raised his arm to pummel you. Your team won by a landslide, but he was still shocked and confused over what happened that day.

Another event was in middle school, sixth grade when your grade was in the midst of puberty, acne and all. Your hair was frizzy, different from your parents, who always had it slicked back. Instead, it was as though you had been electrified, your hair static and standing on edge. You and the other girls in school were just beginning to grow curves and breasts, and despite how you were becoming more attractive through the slow process of puberty, people still didn't approach you. It didn't seem as though you'd mind, though, your nose always buried in the latest dusty textbook. Yoongi had once made the mistake of waiting all week for you at the library to see if you'd show up, but you never did. He assumed you just got the books from your house.

What truly solidified Yoongi's suspicions of your abnormal behaviors was next year, when you both in your last stage of preteen awkwardness, soon to be official teenagers. Yoongi had been tracked down on his way back home and was currently being jumped by a few upperclassmen, brutish high schoolers, intent on asserting their dominance on the gangly-limbed boy who they had stumbled upon. Yoongi was just an easy target, walking by himself, and with a lack of an impressive build. He wasn't the type to wear the leather jackets or grease his hair, as the typical 50s trend was. He was too young to truly catch up on much, quite frankly. Though he doubted that was the reason he was targetted. Despite the fact he'd later become the captain of the basketball team, he never seemed to have an intimidating stature when it came to height.

It was three other boys who didn't have anything better to do. No, they weren't jocks or delinquents- hell, Yoongi didn't know which stereotypical cliques they'd be classified from. It wasn't really the point- they were just boys trying to pick a fight that they knew they'd win.

At that point Yoongi had a busted lip and had crumpled on the floor, the three mocking him with flicks on the forehead and slaps at the back of the head, teasing him for his incapability to properly defend himself from three bullies. They continuously taunted him, pounding their fists and so on. It wasn't as though Yoongi could call 911, as cellphones hadn't existed back then, and the nearest pay phone wasn't in the neighborhood. He couldn't call out for help either since no one else was on the path to his suburban neighborhood, and he had to stay after school for basketball auditions.

He was trapped.

It wasn't until a girl with polka-dot magenta dress sauntered behind the boys when no one was paying attention. If Yoongi was looking out at his surroundings in the meantime, he would've recognized you from a mile away. It wasn't the boots that you always wore or the frizzy hair that was the icing on the cake, but rather the oversized goggles you constantly wore, pushed back like a headband to keep the wisps of hair out of your face. Sure, the fashion had switched from poodle skirts to tight jeans, but you were every bit as strange as your parents.

Yoongi had his arms over his head and was curled up in a ball to protect his face and vital organs. It wasn't until he heard a sharp yelp that his head snapped up, seeing you with your hand on one of the boys' shoulders, who had crumpled to his knees and shook violently before Yoongi. It was as though he was suffering from a violent seizure, his eyes rolling back and his body convulsing before him. In the distance, Yoongi could faintly make out the other two running away, and it wasn't until he fell flat on the floor, blacking out, that Yoongi allowed himself to breathe.

You wore a calm expression on your face, shoving your hands in your pockets as you looked down at Yoongi. You raised a brow, studying his face as though you had never seen it before, despite the fact you two had been in the same classes since you were in diapers.

"Are you ok, Yoongi?" you questioned, examining the blood at the corner of his lip where they had busted it.

"Y...Yeah," Yoongi said softly. He felt somewhat scared to question you about what had just happened, seeing as he could barely process it himself.

You kneeled down, face to face with him. Yoongi realized at that moment just how pretty you were. Weird and unusual, but pretty nonetheless. You weren't like Samantha Baker, who always had her hair smooth and skin flawless, but you had an undeniable beauty to you that someone could only notice if they looked at you from close up. Most people were ugly close up, as you could see their flaws and imperfections, but it was the opposite for you.

You reached out, brushing your thumb against the wound. Yoongi hissed and recoiled from the sting, and you withdrew your hand, some of the blood getting on your thumb.

"Sorry," you said quickly, flinching as well. "It's not that bad- it'll heal in no time, I'm sure. I've got some medicine at my place that should do the trick. I'd understand if you'd rather be left alone, though."

"No, it's ok.  I'll come," Yoongi said. He didn't know why he said it. It wasn't as though he knew you that well. Hell, you two weren't even friends, really. Besides, as curious as he was about your house and family, it wasn't as though he was itching for the opportunity to take a peek inside. Maybe... maybe he just wanted a little longer around you.

The two of you walked together towards your mansion on the hill, and though Yoongi didn't necessarily find it creepy or eery as did his friends, there was still an air of mystery to it.

As soon as you two approached the rusted gate at the base of the walkway to the mansion, it swung open for you two, and before he knew it the two of you were at the front door.

"Wait here," you said, easily opening the door and closing it behind you. Yoongi wondered why you didn't use a key, as it seemed rather foolish to leave such a prestigious house unlocked. He supposed, however, that it was none of his business. He was left staring at the face of the door knocker, a stone dragon with its mouth hanging wide open, the hoop clinging to its jaws between the monstrous teeth. It was so wide open, Yoongi figured he could fit the meat of his arm inside.

He was suddenly startled when he heard various crashing noises from the other side, and soon enough the door swung open. Your goggles were lopsided and your clothes fit funny, but you welcomed him in. To his surprise, the inside of the house was dusty but organized, despite the sounds of a quarrel earlier.

"Stay here. I'll get the medicine," you say, quickly leaving him to observe the house.

It was old and antique, looking ancient but expensive. He looked around, noticing how every inch of the walls was covered with bookshelves piled with dusty textbooks or scrolls. Some of the walls were covered in knickknacks, such as pictures or empty frames, or horseshoes and clocks. Needless objects covered each spare foot, some with writing that Yoongi had never seen before.

He heard the shuffling of footsteps all around him, or the sound of furniture moving, but each time he turned around to find the source of the noise... nothing.

Eventually, he found himself placed in front of a giant painting of your parents.

He could see where you got your quiet beauty from. Your father had strong features, despite how hidden it was. Your mother, for once depicted without the infamous hood, had a sultry and mysterious look, her dark makeup complimenting her image. The two of them appeared stern and broody, and Yoongi wondered how long they had to pose in order for the painter to portray them as old grumps.

"There you are. I was worried you had wandered off."

He turned, and in your hand, you held a bottle. You placed your hand on his cheek, your fingers warm as you made him face you. "Stay still," you spoke, pouring some of the ointment onto your fingers.

Your fingers brushed against his parted lips, and he felt tense. He had kissed a girl- what was so nerve-wracking about one touching his lips? Was it just because he was twelve, and got nervous over every girl in proximity? Or was it more?

"Hey, where are your parents? I would figure they'd be curious about a guy being over and all..." Yoongi wondered.

Your hand stilled in mid-air, and you were silent for a minute. Yoongi was worried about your pause when you spoke. "They're dead."

Yoongi's eyes were wide, but before he could speak you held your hand up to silence him. "It's fine. You don't have to apologize- it isn't your fault. Besides, it's not like I'm really torn up over it. They've been dead for about a year."

"Since you were eleven?" Yoongi gawked. "How did you stay alone in this huge mansion all by yourself? Go to school every day? And the bills for this place must be huge!"

You gave him a weak smile, your cheeks getting a dusty color. "I manage. I'd appreciate if you didn't tell anyone, though. They don't notice since my parents weren't exactly known for going out often, but still, it'd cause a lot of hassle if the word were to get out. I know my parents wouldn't have wanted that."

"You have my word," Yoongi solemnly promised.

You gave him a genuine smile at that and went back to put the medicine back in its proper place. Yoongi looked around, but when he looked back up to the painting, he saw your father's smile, and one of his eyes shut to give him a wink.

Yoongi let out a yelp in surprise, stepping back to bump into one of the sofas. It skidded far more forward than he had expected, and soon you were running back in.

"What is it? What happened?" Your eyes were wide as you looked to Yoongi frantically.

"T-The painting- Your dad-" Yoongi pointed to the painting in question, peering back up at it, only to see that the painting was back in its original state. He gawked in surprise, his jaw slack. "Wait, what? I swear- the picture- your father- he had smiled and was winking and- it moved!"

You shook your head at him, brows furrowed. "Pictures don't move, Yoongi."

"I'm telling you the truth!"

Yoongi wondered for a moment if you were gaslighting him, but he couldn't exactly confront you properly at that. Soon enough, you were escorting him from the premises. "I don't think this house is doing you much good. Besides, you've had a stressful day, it's natural for you to be seeing things. I'll see you around."

Before he could protest, you closed the door in his face, separating you two with the wooden barrier. Yoongi took notice to how the dragon's trap was shut this time around, and surprisingly, the next morning his busted lip had completely healed.

The bullies wouldn't be able to recall the events of what happened, as though it were completely wiped from their memory, and Yoongi was left wondering what exactly about you made all these things possible. His eye was kept on you in class, noting how even when your backpack was filled with textbooks from both home and school, you were able to lift it as though it were as light as a feather. Other times, when he'd see you running through the hallways to get from place to place, he could swear your feet didn't even touch the ground, a mere inch separating the soles of your rundown combat boots to the tile. No one seemed to notice how you were able to get into locked rooms without the teacher's key.

At this point, Yoongi wasn't even sure you were human.

It was when you were eating lunch alone about a week after that Yoongi finally found the guts to approach you. He didn't know what was wrong with him. At this point he had found a respectable reputation with your grade, already making it onto the basketball. Hell, rumor had it that Lim Nayoung had the hots for him, and in 7th grade, she was considered to be the prettiest dolly in class. For a twelve-year-old, that is.

But instead of simply swallowing whatever lingering curiosity he felt towards you, and playing it safe, he sat next to you.

You took a moment to realize he was sitting next to you, as you had your hands on a dusty book as always. It wasn't until Yoongi gave an awkward cough that you looked up, perplexed. You blinked in surprise. "Can I help you?"

Yoongi could feel the stares of his friends at the nearby table, their gazes burning through his skull, their murmurs audible. "I just wanted to talk. I realized I never properly thanked you. Thank you for what happened next week. I am grateful."

"It was nothing," you said simply, returning back to your book.

His face flushed red at the rejection, and he could hear the snickers of his friends behind him. Still, he persisted a bit. "I was wondering if you'd want to walk home together? We take the same path."

Your brows furrowed as you locked eyes with him. "No thank you."

He felt his heart sink. "I... respect your decision. But is it alright if I ask why?"

"I just don't want to be a source of amusement for your friends. They make fun of me enough," you shrug. Yoongi's mind wandered to when Nayoung and Eunwoo were commenting on how weird you were, murmuring and snickering to themselves about your weird books and funny clothes. It was no secret that you were seen as an oddball, as was the rest of your family. It was understandable that you had your reservations.

"I want you to know that wasn't my intention. I just wanted to spend some time with you. Get to know you better, y'know?" He paused, eliciting no reaction from you. He sighed. "I'll leave you alone then. Sorry for bothering you."

He walked back to his table, dejected. His friends hollered and slapped him on the back, snickering at his reaction.

"What made you go for weirdo Y/N of all girls? Got a type for freams?" one friend joked.

"Shut up, Jimin," Yoongi hissed. "You're the one who's mental, considering the fact you got your head stuck in a chair."

"It was one time!"

"What Jimin's saying is that you don't want to get involved with her. After all, she's her mother's daughter," another friend pointed out.

Yoongi's lips pursed in annoyance. "It's not the 1800's anymore, let's not express prejudice. The adults do that enough for us. Besides, I can say the same about you, Taehyung, and your mother collects bath salts."

"Wow, this crush has got you acting bonkers!" Jimin commented, wincing at Yoongi's low blow. "What's got you so whipped? I didn't even think you knew Y/N."

"Forget about it, ok? It's not a crush. What's wrong with a guy wanting to be friends with someone?"

"As much as she may not look- or act- like one, she is still a girl," Taehyung pointed out.

"So?"

"So? You're a boy. A straight one at that. I don't know what Y/N is, but considering the fact I saw her gawk at Kim Seokjin before he moved- right when he got his braces off if you remember- I'd say she's a straight girl."

"Get to the point," Yoongi grunted.

"It's a fundamental fact that boys and girls can't be friends."

"That's bull," Yoongi immediately replied.

"Just admit you want to jump her bones."

"My intentions are completely innocent, unlike you pervs."

The conversation was long forgotten until after lunch when you approached Yoongi, book clutched to your chest.

"I heard you defend me," you said simply, your voice monotonous.

"Oh, uh, it was nothing. Just the decent thing to do," Yoongi replied awkwardly. God, why was he so nervous around you when he had Lim Nayoung of all people up his ass?

"It was." You were silent for a moment, a pregnant pause between the two of you. "If you really want to walk with me to and from school, I'm ok with that. I of all people shouldn't have judged you so quickly. You seem to be a decent guy."

"Really? You're ok with that?" His brows seemed to disappear into his hairline.

"I am," you nodded. "Someone has to make sure you don't get your ass beat again."

Yoongi laughed at that, a genuine, hearty laugh that brought the first smile he had ever seen on your lips.

Time seemed to drag on before it was after school, and he found himself tapping his foot impatiently, anxiety filling him as he waited for you. You approached soon enough, the flurry of students escaping the building far ahead of you.

"You came," you commented.

"I'm the one who suggested this. I wasn't going to just stand you up," Yoongi shrugged, adjusting his backpack.

The two of you walked side by side, unsure of what to talk about.

Yoongi, being the dumbass he was, simply questioned what he had been wondering this entire time. "How'd you beat up those guys last week?"

"What do you mean?"

"Even if you're some expert fighter, being a small, younger girl against multiple bigger guys- it doesn't make sense," Yoongi questioned. "It's impossible."

"Is that why you asked me to walk with you?"

"No. Not completely. One of the reasons, I suppose. It's been on my mind. All of it- what I remember at least- was unnatural."

You hummed to yourself. "I dunno- dumb luck I guess."

"You didn't use any weapons."

"I don't carry a knife on me if that's what you're wondering."

"You just touched him and he passed out. A seizure."

"You were seeing things. You took a few blows to the head."

"Don't gaslight me!" Yoongi exclaimed, suddenly frustrated. "I know what I saw. I don't know why you're lying to my face."

You were silent for a moment, the two of you stop in your tracks. You studied his face. "Why are you so interested in me? Is it really because of that day?"

"I've been interested in getting to know you for a while now- but that was the catalyst," Yoongi guessed. "I knew something was off. The others may think you're weird, but they think that because of your hair or your family or your clothes. I just thought you wanted to keep to yourself but... I don't know, there seems to be more to you than there is to others. Same thing with your family. Things don't add up. What I saw, your house- everything. I'm not going to blab to others if that's what you're wondering, but I can't deny what I saw."

You pursed your lips. "You really should just forget about me, Yoongi."

"Is it why you don't have any friends?" Yoongi questioned. "I mean, why you stay to yourself all the time, just reading textbooks? Could you be doing everything you do just to keep others away? Most people join clubs or branch out or let people approach them but you're-"

"Different," you interrupted. "So you've said, as cliche as it is."

"I'm not going to judge you," Yoongi promised. "I really do want to be your friend- no funny business. From what I can tell you don't have any, but truthfully that doesn't seem very healthy. If you really want me to leave you alone, just tell me to fuck off. I'll pretend none of this ever happened. However, I think you and I both know that you need at least one good friend in this world. I can't help that I'm drawn to you, wanting to get to know you. So I'd really like it if you'd let me."

After he finished his little speech, there was a pause. He was anxious and tense, waiting for your response. You simply stared at him with those big, blank eyes of yours, and he wondered if you were really going to tell him to fuck off despite his proposal of friendship.

Instead, you sucked in a breath. "I can't believe I'm considering this."

He felt elated, excited, and shocked. "So yes?"

"You won't believe me. Let's go to my place, and I'll explain. You're right- I do owe you an explanation. What you saw was real, and I shouldn't gaslight you or lie to you. You're perhaps one of the only people at school who's decent to me, and as much as I hate to admit it, I do need a friend. If anyone's going to be that friend, it'll be you."

"What do you mean by that?" Yoongi wasn't insulted, only curious.

You turned back to him, lips pressed in a tight line. "You're the only one who's given me a chance. It's only fair I do the same for you."

-

Yoongi took in a deep breath the moment he stepped inside of your house, breathing in the scent. The scent was something similar to when someone opens a new book for the first time, breathing in the freshly made pages.

You departed momentarily, only to return shortly with two vials in hand.

You hand one to him. "I just want you to know, you have no reason to trust me. We're virtually strangers."

"I'm kinda trying to fix that."

"I'm just giving you a heads up that any suspicions you have are understandable. Once we do this, it'll be impossible for you to... I don't want to say back out, or forget. Maybe unsee? It's a point we can't turn from, you and I, and I'm taking a big risk by doing this."

"Well, let's do it already," Yoongi huffed. "Blabber all you want, but I thought we established this already."

You shrug nonchalantly, not taking his impatience to heart. "I just wanted to make sure you didn't have any last minute reservations. Should've figured with a persistent Clyde like you. Very well, then. Link our arms together, and then take it like a shot. It's going to taste bitter, so I've been told."

"Like some sort of circled couple, huh?" Yoongi questions, quirking a brow. "What does this do?"

"It's similar to the wedding thing, yes. What I'll say and show you will seem crazy, though. It'll link our souls together so that no matter how far away we are from each other, we're bonded. It's a soulmate sort of thing, our souls entwined. It means we can't be spiritually separated unless there are desperate means, a painful process, might I add. We'll barely sense the other's intense emotions, but that's about as freaky as that gets. After we drink, I'll tell you what you want to know, and the bond will prevent you from spilling to outsiders."

"Why does it not affect you?" Yoongi is unfazed, trying to keep his cool so that you don't suddenly get cold feet.

"It's my secret- and it does affect me, seeing as I'm going to be bonded to your ass for the rest of eternity," you huff. "You still in?"

"Fuck yeah," Yoongi says crassly, a sideways grin spreading across his face, growing more so once he sees you mimic it. "Let's do this."

Your arms intertwine, and you both tilt your head back, taking a shot of the bitter liquid. You were right, it was bitter. Yoongi felt as though he were taking a cumshot.

After your arms loosen, both of you wag your tongues out, trying to get the bitter taste out of your mouth.

"Dear god, that's disgusting. Remind me never to tell you any secrets that I can't risk getting out," Yoongi spat.

You coughed and sputtered, nodding your head at the statement. Once you both calmed down, your breathing evening, you huff.

Yoongi waits patiently for what you're about to say.

"I'm a witch," you say. "Magical, that is. My entire family is and we live among you all."

Well, that wasn't what he was expecting.

"So, like, the pointy top hat and everything? And a broom?" Yoongi cackled. "Were you seriously just doing all of this to scare me away? Bullshitting me?"

You snap your fingers, and suddenly Yoongi is being sat in a chair, a cushy sofa sliding forward to catch him. You smirk in amusement at his expression, and suddenly furniture begins to move in every which way, books flying off of shelves literally, flapping as though they had wings. Lamps flickered on and off, and the fireplace came to life, quite literally.

"Well well well, we've got a guest! Thought you were the antisocial type, Miss Y/N."

"Yoongi, I'd like you to meet my fireplace, Maximus. Maximus, my new soulmate."

The fireplace roared, flames reaching higher and curling around the cavern of its encampment. "You're not saying-"

"I did."

"Y/N, how could you?"

"Why not?" You huff, staring over at Yoongi's expression. "You can see why I was hesitant, can't you? Don't worry, if you want I can make you forget all of this ever happened. I have an elixir for almost everything in the pantry."

"That doesn't change the fact that your souls are bonded together!" Maximus reminded you, scowling.

"It was the only way to make sure he couldn't possibly blab even if he tried!" you argued. "He was persistent and..."

"And what?" Maximus scowled.

"And maybe I wanted a friend, ok? All the others think of me as some sort of freak, and it's hard having a fireplace as the only thing to talk to," you said quietly. Your eyes widen at your outburst, and you turn to Yoongi. "I'm sorry. I should be focusing on you. I'm sure this is all a shock to you."

Yoongi blinked a bit, slowly processing everything. You were a witch. Magic was real. Your fireplace was alive.

You began to panic, hyperventilating, your breathing heavy and voice shaky. With wide eyes, you begin to tremble, tears rolling down your cheek as your mind got the best of you. "You want to forget everything already, don't you? God, I regret this. I shouldn't have dragged you into this, but I was so selfish and I wanted a friend because I was lonely and God-"

"Y/N, Y/N, shh, calm down," Yoongi said, gently grasping your upper arms, running his hands up and down as though to soothe you. He gives you a warm smile, genuine and comforting, and little by little your breathing began to ease. "It's ok. Cool it. I understand. I don't regret finding out, and I'm more than interested to be your friends, magic and all. It's a bit much to process, but I can tell you upfront that it doesn't change how I feel. No sweat!"

You wipe away at the hot tears that had rolled down your cheeks, cracking a soft smile. "So you're ok with this? Me, being magic? Witches and all this stuff? You don't think it's weird? You still want to be my friend?"

Yoongi laughed at that, feeling elated, as though it were the start of a new beginning. It felt like the first few seconds when you get strapped into a ride, about to begin. "Everyone's varying levels of weird; you just have to find someone who's compatible."

You laugh at that, your tense shoulders beginning to visibly ease.

"So, tell me more about this magic thing."

-

It was the beginning of your budding friendship with Yoongi, and he found himself more enamored and fascinated than he could've believed. It was a whole new world to discover, one hidden beneath everyone's nose.

You and Yoongi had found yourselves in the woods, a frequent place for you and he to have your discussions. You weren't so comfortable with hanging out with him in public just yet, unused to stares and curious glances, people wanting to know more about you beyond the vague facts. Rumors would spread, ones far more tangible than the others, and all would pertain to Yoongi. Relationship? Blackmail? Family? You weren't prepared for the sort of rumors everyone else was usually talking about.

Yoongi didn't mind. He was patient. It was alright if he couldn't take you to the sock hops he frequented. Though, he was curious if you knew how to work a jukebox. He only wanted you to feel more comfortable around him, and if that meant alone, then so be it.

You were reading from a dusty textbook, which Yoongi would soon come to discover was a book of spells. It was in a language he couldn't decipher, though the pictures could show what one was trying to accomplish. It had many things from curses, jinxes, and potions. He supposed he would study rigorously too if it pertained to magic. What was better, learning to hold fire in one's palm, or memorize the digits of pi?

Yoongi's head nestled in your lap, the first time the two of you had even attempted to put some physical intimacy in your relationship. Yoongi had questioned if it was alright, and though you were nervous, you accepted.

So far, what Yoongi had learned about you wasn't beyond comprehension. Your anxiety could run from subtle to severe at times, and you weren't very self-assured. It mainly pertained to the fact that you had no friends, no one to really talk to or engage with regularly. Yoongi wondered if your friendship together would let you grow and become less socially awkward, perhaps letting you get more confidence.

"So how come witches and wizards don't just take over the world? Or come out of hiding? It must be exhausting having to hide your true self on a day to day basis."

"It's easier to stay in hiding so that both races can peacefully coexist. Last time our kind tried to reveal themselves was the Salem Witch Trials, and we know how that went. None of the actual witches were caught, but it did erupt havoc and destroy hundreds of lives. It wouldn't have happened if the witches in question were more careful. Besides, humans have gotten so far with their technology that it would completely detonate or destroy both races, what with their atom bombs and such. It's a lot less goopy to let both coexist, especially considering the fact that we're pretty integrated and many of us control things from behind the scenes. Not everything has to be solved with violence."

"Besides that," you continued, "there's a bit of a stigma about your people. We try to avoid mingling with you at all costs. Wizardkind has some sort of belief that humans are dangerous in their own right, simply spreading hatred and destroying everything in their wake. Besides that, they'd get greedy of the wizards' power, and seek it for themselves. I do agree with that bit to a degree, but I don't think they're as evil as perceived. My parents told me that there's good and bad to everything, which I think is right. You spread hatred, but there's some of you that spread love. I think those few are worth saving the group for."

"Seems like the opposite of the 'one bad apple ruins the bunch' phrase, hm?" Yoongi hummed.

You shrugged. "You're one of the good apples. I wouldn't want to punish you for your group's actions."

"You have a point there, I suppose," Yoongi agreed. Don't judge the group by the person, or the person by the group. "

"A lot of bloodsheds could've been prevented if people listened to those wise words," you muse whimsically.

"So how much is it that you know?"

"The basics, I suppose. And then some. I guess you'd have to specify," you say, playing with the fabric of your skirt. "There are different kinds of magic to specify in, you know. Some specify in potions, others in charms. There's light magic and dark magic, and while neither is necessarily evil, one is far more dangerous than the other. And of course, there are varying degrees of skill and such."

"So what are you best at, per se?" Yoongi inquired. "I see you more so as a jack of all trades, honestly."

You smile softly at that. "I'll take that as a compliment." You mull over it for a moment. "It's true, anyone can learn any particular skill, so long as they've got the magic running through their veins. Each family specializes in something. But there's a kind of talent that goes along with it that's necessary for one to excel. Sort of like how someone can be great at the piano and be only subpar at drawing, no matter how much they practice."

"So what's your talent?"

You press your lips together in a firm line. "I still have yet to really find that out. I'm young, so I've got a long way to go. My family specialized in the dark arts in particular."

Yoongi sits up at that. "You mean your family was of dark wizards?"

"I wouldn't necessarily say that. There is a stigma around wizards like us, but we aren't evil. I mean, they weren't," you correct yourself. "It's more dangerous though and looked down upon. Most wizards don't dare to even venture into it."

"What does it consist of?" Yoongi questioned. "Occult sort of things?"

"Somewhat," you shrug. "It can vary. Curses and hexes, some jinxes. Some of it is darker, though. Like raising people from the dead or speaking to them. There are some spells to make someone go insane, or control them."

"Have your parents taught you any of it? Or do you just know some from the book."

You purse your lips. "I don't really touch that sort of thing. We've got a small shelf in our library of those, but I try to avoid it."

"How come? It's sort of part of your heritage."

"Exactly," you sigh, "I mean... it reminds me of my parents."

Yoongi's face softens at that. "Oh... I'm sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up."

You shake your head, the sorrowful expression on your face being wiped off with a smile. "No, it's fine. I told you I'd answer any questions you have, and I meant it. We're friends, right? Friends tell each other these sorts of things."

Yoongi nods stiffly at that. "Yeah. I just didn't mean to pry."

"It's alright," you assure him. "What about you? We've spent too much time talking about me. I want to know about your family."

"There's not much to know. We aren't nearly as interesting as you guys," Yoongi shrugs. "I've got a younger brother named Yohan, and he's in... what is it, fourth, fifth grade? Yeah. He's nine."

"That's sweet," you smile softly. "I always wanted a younger sibling."

"Don't bother, they're annoying as hell," Yoongi scoffed. "Anyways, my dad has some office job downtown. Involves a lot of paperwork and seems boring as hell. Something to do with a lot of numbers. My mom's the most interesting, being a cancer survivor and all."

Your eyes light up at that. "You're kidding!"

"No, she is. She won't let me forget it, too. Every time I forget to clean my room or complain she uses it against me," Yoongi laughs. "Though I suppose she has the right to."

"I would too, if I were her," you tell him honestly. "I'm glad she's better now, though."

"So am I," Yoongi says. "What about your parents? When they were alive, if you don't mind me asking."

Your expression softens at that, no longer as bright. "They were... odd. I know that sounds weird coming from me. My mom was very stern and strict, having to teach me with discipline. She was a bit judgemental in my opinion, from what I remember, that is. My father was a lot more light-hearted, a bit more on the whimsical side. My father would make sure my mother wasn't always nagging and loosened up, and my mother made sure my father stayed grounded on Earth."

"How did they pass?" Yoongi questions.

"Automobile accident," you tell him. "Flip-top was old and unreliable, and my father was never one for human inventions. It's surprising it didn't happen earlier."

Yoongi's brows furrow. "I'm sure the papers would've reported that. No one else knows they're gone."

You tense up at that but shrug your shoulders. "Probably because they never left the house, anyway. The accident happened in another town anyway, so it wouldn't be reported here. Not that these nuclear families would care."

Yoongi opens his mouth to apologize, afraid that he had offended you, but you cut him off. "I apologize- that was crass," you say quickly. "I know I sound bitter, but it's just because I've been so distant from the rest of you. Regular people... it's discouraged from mingling with them any further than necessary, anything more than just blending in. My parents were adamant on that rule, and I had been sheltered so long that I grew to somewhat resent all of the others. Sure, they weren't exactly outreaching by any means, but I'm sure being aloof wasn't the best option. But I'm learning with you now, and I'm glad to do so."

Yoongi was oddly touched by your words, and he shifts on the grass, sitting closer next to you to bump his shoulder against your own. "I'm glad to be friends with you too," he says, wondering if it were too soon for him to admit that during this budding friendship.

You smiled, beaming at him, and soon his chin was resting on your shoulder as the two of you studied the pages of your textbook together.

-

"So, you've gotten pretty close to Yoongi, huh?"

You had been cornered in the middle of the hallway before your locker, your bright purple dress of the day making you easy to find. You automatically flinch at the sound of the locker slamming shut, Eunwoo's perfectly manicured hand splayed across the surface.

Your lungs felt tight, anxiety running high. You were a very anxious person, truth be told, though you weren't sure how much of that as you or just the fact that you were a preteen. Nevertheless, your heartbeat thundered in your ears, and you yearned for any way out. You were one to buckle under pressure or scamper away, anything to avoid confrontation. This wasn't an exception.

You couldn't say that you didn't see this coming, though. Only a week after befriending and hanging out with Yoongi, and you were being harassed. In a vicious cage known as middle school, popularity was everything, so it made sense that two alpha girls like Eunwoo's and Nayoung were here to put you in your proper place as prey.

Yoongi was one of the quieter guys who didn't seem that popular, yet every girl and guy liked. Sure, he wasn't super outgoing and outstanding, but perhaps it was his broody and casual demeanor- more accurately his looks- that just had prepubescent teens swooning left and right.

Eunwoo and Nayoung, the latter having a thing for him since elementary school since he kissed Seungyeon on the monkey bars, were no exception.

"Yes," you squeaked, hugging your books to your chest tightly. You were suddenly very self-conscious, staring down at your muddy, worn boots, soiled from the rain that morning. Your dress was barely being held together by safety pins, and you looked like you were a five year old attempting to play dress up.

Eunwoo towered over you, glaring down at you as Nayoung supported her at the back. She pokes the center of your chest, jabbing it roughly, as though daring you to meet her eye. You didn't. "What makes you so special, huh? You're just some nerd whose probs a secret Red. Regular commie who won't even make it anywhere in life."

"Why don't you quit the bit. Yoongi shouldn't have dirt like you rubbing onto his name," Nayoung snickered. "You're cruisin' for a bruisin' at this rate. I'd figure someone like you wouldn't be so fast, but I guess it's the only way for you to get anyone to like you. Slut."

You feel tears spring up in your eyes, and you try to choke them down. Your throat is tight, constricting around the lump as you do your best not to bawl. You wish to scream that you're not sleeping with Yoongi, that you just wanted to be a friend, but you had to contain yourself. Whenever your emotions got the best of you, your magic tended to burst out. You struggled already to contain it.

"Why don't you squares leave her alone," someone pipes up. The three of you look up to Yoongi, walking up to you only to sling an arm around your shoulders, tugging you close to his body in a protective manner. "You're just bugging her because you got clutched last Friday- everyone knows. Everyone also thinks that you're not destined to be anything more than paper shakers in the future, so why don't you do yourself a favor and split."

Eunwoo and Nayoung's faces turned bright red, both wishing to say something. True enough, both did split, stomping away. Yoongi turned to you, beaming. His expression morphs into worry, however, and he wipes away some of the tears you didn't realize had slid down your cheeks.

"Hey, don't cry, I've got this. I might not hold up well during a physical fight, but I've gotten pretty good at insulting people. One of the benefits of having a sibling," he chuckled. "You doing ok?"

You nodded, wiping your cheeks with your sleeves. "Yeah. You didn't have to do that, though. I don't want to burden you."

Yoongi scoffed at that. "Nonsense. What're friends for?"

He walked you to your classroom, and you were unable to conceal your smile the entire way. Yoongi was a true friend, through and through, it seemed.

-

"C'mon, I trust you!" Yoongi insisted. "It'll be fine. You need someone to practice on anyway."

"I'm not going to doom my best friend to the life of a toad!" you scowl back, crossing your arms. "It's not even my family's specialty- it isn't in my blood."

"You have yet to even tell me what said specialty is," Yoongi huffed.

The two of you were fourteen now, two years into the friendship. It was the summer before high school, both of you more than ready to move onto the next stage of adolescence. Throughout the two years, you and Yoongi had bonded, becoming attached to the hip practically. Many thought the two of you were going steady, but without a pin to prove it, they remained rumors.

The two of you let them stay rumors, merely enjoying each other's company. Little did they know that you and Yoongi were spending days together practicing spells and such.

Most of the time it was you practicing your spells with him, Yoongi acting as both a guinea pig and support system. Your adolescent anxiety had become a bit less prominent, your confidence slowly building with Yoongi's constant boosts. Other times Yoongi would drag you out dancing, putting in three plays of Elvis Presley's Don't Be Cruel. Yoongi would always laugh and spin you around on these days, making you scream in delight when he'd dip you in surprise. You got to see a side of Yoongi that wasn't stoic and cool, instead releasing a goofball who deeply cared for his loved ones. And in turn, he gave you confidence and moral support.

This was one of the days where Yoongi was pushing your boundaries, encouraging you to do one of the more difficult spells of transfiguration- the act of transforming one thing into another. In this case, he wanted to make you into a toad.

The two of you had already done many things magic-related together. From making potions and singing his eyebrows to extreme levitation spells where Yoongi got stuck on the ceiling for a day, and you had to float pieces of cereal and such up to him while he flew from wall to wall in attempts to get the spell to wear down quicker.

"No! What if I can't turn you back?"

"I believe in you! You just let your anxiety get the best of you sometimes and panic. It doesn't have to be a toad... Make it a cat or something. You like cats, right?"

"Yoongi, you're allergic to cats."

"I doubt I'll be allergic to myself," Yoongi huffed. "Look, remember how when we first started doing this you weren't able to do so much as ignite a flame? Now you're able to do love potions and levitation spells! You've improved so much, and practice makes perfect. I wouldn't have suggested it if I didn't believe you could do it."

You frowned, taming your frizzy hair out of nervousness, mulling it over. "I don't know..."

Yoongi, however, could tell you were giving in. You were weak to the knees when it came to him, and he knew it. He let out a triumphant, gummy grin, knowing he was wearing you down. "It's the next chapter of your textbook, we can't just skip. Y/N, imagine how soft my ears will be. You know you'll want to pet me."

You grimaced. "Don't say it like that!"

"You're right, you want to pet me even when I'm in human form," Yoongi joked, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Oh my god, I'll do it if you just shut up, pervert!" you exclaimed, your face turning bright red. You put on your goggles, strapping them over your face.

Yoongi had asked you once why you always put them on since they weren't needed. You told him that it was an old habit your father did when he did magic, and the goggles were his last gift to you before your parents' untimely demise.

Neither of you tried to dwell on that, though, knowing the past wasn't the best thing to be stuck in. Especially considering how dark yours tended to be. Yoongi could peel back the layers if he wanted, and though he knew there was more you were possibly hiding, he didn't pry. He wasn't sure if he really wanted to know.

Yoongi laughed heartily at that, watching you with delight. He'd never admit this to you, but he always found you absolutely enchanting when you did magic. Your eyes seemed to glow from within, the tips of your fingers turning gold as it flowed through you. The ends of your hair would float above your hair, flickering like a flame. With a sweep of your arms and uttering of a language that Yoongi failed to comprehend, Yoongi was suddenly thrust with a beam of dark purple.

He felt his limbs and body shrink, his clothes falling around him on the floor, and your small frame got unusually bigger... and bigger... and bigger. It wasn't until he was on all fours and staring up at you that he realized the transformation was complete.

He was a jet black cat.

You, on the other hand, had squeezed your eyes shut when you did the spell, only now opening your eyes to spare a peek at your creation. You immediately let out squeals of awe at the furry creature before you, scooping Cat-Yoongi into your arms and petting him, scratching behind his ears as he purred.

"Aren't you the cutest little thing!" you cooed. "I'm tempted to keep you this way so that I won't have to listen to your yapping anymore."

Cat-Yoongi hissed at that, and you laughed, scratching the bottom of his chin as you put him down. "I'm joking, I'm joking. I'm sure I'd be weird for even witch standards if my best friend was a cat."

"You did well on this one, Miss Y/N," Maximus complimented, his flames flickering. "Though you need to remember to keep your eyes open. You can't flinch and be scared of your own spells- what if you aimed wrong and hit someone else when performing a spell?"

"I won't have to worry about that for a bit. The self-defense and attacking spells aren't for another twenty chapters or so," you say.

"True, but at the rate, you're moving it'll be within only a few months," Maximus responded. "Now, try to keep your eyes open while you transform him back."

"Do I have to?" you pondered, Cat-Yoongi brushing between your legs affectionately. "Wait a minute- you better not be looking under my skirt, you heathen!"

Maximus chuckled, your fireplace finding your accusation amusing. "All the more reason to transform him back."

"Fine," you huffed, stepping back. Cat-Yoongi stood back at the spot he was at previously, cocking his head to the side to peer at you with those big round eyes of his. You gushed inside, knowing all too well you'd be performing this spell later on. You do the steps in reverse, and the moment your encantation leaves your lips the beam hits Yoongi square in the chest, and he's transformed back into his human form.

Naked.

"Gah! Put some clothes on!" You yank your goggles back over your head, covering your eyes as you turn to give him privacy.

"Don't look! Don't look!" Yoongi cried, hastily putting on his clothes in embarrassment.

Your fireplace only cackled wickedly at the scene that played out before him, the two of you embarrassed beyond belief.

-

You're fifteen when you tell Yoongi that you love him.

You didn't know why you did it. The two of you had been best friends for about three years now- things were going good.

Why'd you screw it up like this?

The truth was that you had a crush on Yoongi. A big fat crush that seemed to loom over you whenever you were in his presence. You had these feelings since forever, it seemed. You always thought he was cute- one of the reasons you went out of your way to save him when he was being taunted by bullies. Well, that and the goodness of your heart, you supposed.

Figures that it's the guy you were most attracted to in your prepubescent phase that you end up befriending.

So when the two of you became friends, you worked to suppress the feelings. He was your only friend- you didn't want to screw it up as you did everything else. Besides, boys were gross, you knew that. You were only distracted by his looks, and once you got to know all the disgusting details that came with friendship, surely the feelings would die down.

Right?

And yes, you learned many disgusting details. Yoongi was an idiot in many things, as it turned out. He'd leave his underwear around on the floor and give his little brother wet willies whenever he'd bug the two of you about dating, singing that kissing song until Yoongi popped his finger in his ear.

But despite the repulsive side to your best friend, you fell more. He was charming when he was allowed to be, soft and shy at times, but always honest and blunt. He saw things for more than what they appeared to be, despite what everyone else thought.

No matter, you thought. The two of you were going through puberty- no doubt he'd get ugly. You'd stay best friends with him of course, but surely your feelings for him were shallow and purely based on appearance. He'd become greasy-faced and lanky, being too tall and too shiny.

But no- God had decided to torture you. Instead of puberty hitting him like a bus, Yoongi eased into a handsome state. His jawline became sharper, shoulders became broader, and he sprouted like a weed, though not too tall for you to barely be able to make out his face in the clouds. He seemed to suit the present trends, wearing leather jackets and finally doing his hair instead of the mussed updo he adorned. You looked back on the photos of the two of you on your mantelpiece, wondering how you possibly found that little barnacle attractive when you were a preteen, at least in comparison to how he looked now.

You had to face the facts: you were undeniably, irrevocably, and totally in love with your best friend Min Yoongi.

Yet here you were, years of keeping your feelings at bay, only to blurt them out suddenly.

The two of you were watching an I Love Lucy rerun at his house since your own lacked a television. His family was asleep, and you spent so much time at each other's houses that none of them suspected much. If you two were to date, wouldn't you have done it already?

You were both planning a sleepover for the night. The grease was out of Yoongi's hair, and the two of you were wearing the matching cat pajamas you had bought shortly after the cat incident- a spell you'd use frequently. He knew it was the easiest way for you to cheer up when you were having a bad day, and there was nothing better than having Cat-Yoongi purring in your lap, sleeping as your sorrows melted away.

You and Yoongi were laughing at the part where Lucy got drunk on national television. He was shaking, his eyes squinting and gummy smile showing. You admired his happy look, noticing how he positively glowed in the light of the twelve-inch screen.

Which brought you to this moment.

"I love you."

Yoongi froze, looking up at you. "What?"

Your face flushed, and you were suddenly very self-conscious of the angel. He could probably see your double chin from this angle. You scoot away, letting his head fall to the cushions as you stammer to correct yourself. "A-As a best friend of course. Not anything weird l-like being in love with you or anything."

"Oh... right."

"I-I don't know why I said that. I made you uncomfortable, I'm sure. I blurted it out without thinking what it sounded like, and I'm really so-"

"I love you, too."

You freeze at that, looking up at him. His eyes have met yours, and he was sitting up now. There was a silence between the two of you, only filled with the noise from the TV.

"What?" you say, your voice a hushed whisper.

"I love you, too," he repeats, just as clear as before.

You light up, but your heart sinks again. He meant as a friend, of course. It was only to make you feel better.

"Do you mean that?" you question, voice soft.

"Of course I do. What would I do without you?" He slings an arm over your shoulders and hugs you to his body, pressing a kiss to your temple. "We're friends, after all."

Your heart sinks into your stomach, but your nerves have eased along with the embarrassment. You instead melt into his embrace, trying to seem happy still. "Yeah, best friends."

-

The two of you are sixteen when the prospect of a relationship finally comes up.

Yoongi had thought about it from time to time, of course. The two of you were in your sophomore year of high school, and while the two of you had grown a bit from your prepubescent ways, you were both close.

Yoongi ventured more to the greaser side, adorning leather jackets and checking out sock hops regularly. His new rag top was swinging, the car souped up due to some of your fancy spells. The cherry red color did well to attract girls to bring to the passion pit, the two of them usually necking and doing the ol' back seat bingo at the drive-in movies.

You, on the other hand, had become a bit more approachable. A bigger school meant bigger crowds, some more accepting at that. Perhaps it helped when Yoongi got you new threads before the start of high school, the two of you spending nights together sewing and forming clothes that'd fit you properly. You still wore your oversized goggles and boots, but with your favorite well-fitting pale, candle-like yellow dress that made your skin glow and the curves you developed, you were becoming a babe yourself. Gone was the naive girl who wouldn't look up from her own feet, but rather a developing woman who was becoming confident in her own abilities.

You and Yoongi were still well known best friends, despite being on the opposite sides. However, you had your own identities now. You were no longer known as the girl who hung at Yoongi's side, and he wasn't known as the one who took pity on the freak.

You were becoming yourselves.

However, neither of you were quite ready to admit your true feelings for one another- until a certain date came along.

Yoongi was hanging with the guys, helping them fix up their cars. All of them thought he was some sort of mechanical genius, but little did they know that there wasn't anything that your magic could do. That with melted butterfly wings and evaporated poison ivy (one of the smelliest potions Yoongi would come to find out).

He was helping Hoseok with his cruiser at the moment, Taehyung and Jimin out getting some food while the two of them worked on the rocket at hand. Hoseok's engine appeared to be having difficulty, and Yoongi could only do his best with what little information he actually did know. Couldn't risk his reputation, after all.

"Hey, Yoongs, I was sort of wanting to talk to you about something. It involves Y/N."

Yoongi froze, tense beneath the car. He scooted out, wiping some of the grease on his hands onto his white shirt. He had to stay composed. Worst case scenario, Hoseok had discovered what you actually were. Even that wouldn't be so bad, though. Out of all the hot rods that Yoongi hung out with, Hoseok seemed to be the least judgmental of you. Even back in the day, when you were an awkward preteen mess, Hoseok never spoke ill of you the way Taehyung or Jimin did, the teases.

"What about her?"

"Well, you two are friends right?" Hoseok appeared to be a bit cautious with his wording, as though afraid he'd set Yoongi off.

Yoongi only wore a blank expression. "Yeah, I'd say so. Best friends in fact."

"Yeah... So, are you like, anything more with her?" Hoseok wondered.

Yoongi' s heart stopped once he realized what Hoseok was trying to say. "You like Y/N?"

"Well, I mean yeah. I'm not, like, crazy for her or anything. I just think she's cute, y'know?" Hoseok explained. "But I wanted to ask you first because I wasn't sure whether or not you pinned her or anything. It wouldn't be cool to go after another guy's girl."

"Y/N isn't my girl," Yoongi clarified.

"So you'd be cool with me asking her out this weekend?" Hoseok asked, brightening up.

Yoongi gritted his teeth, anger swelling in his chest. "Yeah, sure dude. Whatever. Just don't fake out or anything. I don't want you to hurt her."

"You guys are close, huh?" Hoseok chuckled. "Didn't you call her your soulmate or something once?"

"Platonically speaking, I guess," Yoongi murmured. "We just get each other."

"I figured. You two were close since, what, middle school? I didn't think much of her back then, admittedly, but you did. It's like one day the two of you were strangers and the next you were all goo goo eyes. I thought you were whipped- hell, we all did. Thought you had her jacketed and everything. We were wrong, obviously, but even I have to admit she's a regular babe now."

"So you like her because she's attractive now?" Yoongi could hear the underlying malice in his tone, but he couldn't take it back even if he tried.

Hoseok put his hands up in false surrender. "Woah, dude, I didn't mean to offend you or anything. Don't get me wrong, she's nice and all as well. It's kinda hard to talk to her though. She's shy around everyone else but you, y'know. I wouldn't mind getting to know her well. Besides, if she really wanted someone who was there just for her personality, you two would've hit it off by now."

"Yeah, I guess you're right. Sorry for snapping." What was wrong with him today? Something about you and Hoseok together seemed off to him. He didn't like the sound of it.

Hoseok clapped him on the back, grinning brightly. "Don't worry, Yoongs. Maybe we can double date someday or something. Didn't you lay one on Roa just two weeks ago? From what I heard she's dying to again. We could all see some flick together or something."

"I don't know, maybe. I'll think about it," Yoongi grumbled bitterly.

He was a mess.

-

You paced before Maximus, the fireplace crackling with each step you took. You fidgeted with your dress, smoothing wrinkles, playing with the hem.

"I don't understand why you're being so nervous. It's just a date," Maximus said. "Didn't you say Hoseok as a nice guy?"

"I know, I know. He is! I just..." You didn't know how to end the sentence.

"You wish it was Yoongi?"

"God, I'm pathetic, aren't I?" you whine, burying your face in your hands. "Here I am, pining over my best friend, all while some other guy is on his way to pick me up. I'd figure I'd be over it within four years."

"That's love, dear," Maximus hummed. "Some boys are just a bit more hesitant than others."

"Maybe this date is for the best," you pondered aloud. "It could help me move on, y'know? Friends shouldn't see each other as more than friends. It ruins the means of friendship and is irreversible."

"Do you really want to get over him, though?"

"I don't know!" you wail, throwing your hands up in the air. "I told Yoongi about the date, and he just said 'Congrats'. What does that mean?"

"Congratulations, I assume."

You bit your lip nervously. "Maybe I should call Hoseok and cancel the date. This is a bad idea-"

It was at that moment that your doorbell rang, and you jumped up, your heart pounding in your chest.

"Aren't you going to answer it?" Maximus questioned.

"Oh, right. Wish me luck," you said, grabbing your purse before heading to the door. You weren't sure if it was butterflies or dread filling your stomach.

-

You and Hoseok were at the sock hop, the two of you spinning around each other, your dress swishing around your legs. You weren't the best dancer, admittedly, but you came to find out that Hoseok could more than makeup for it. One moment you were grasping onto his leather jacket, stiff as a board, and the next moment your legs were in the air and your hands in his greased hair, doing your best to keep up with the music that was blaring throughout.

"See? You're not that bad!" Hoseok grinned, hands clasped in yours as you twisted your hips from side to side.

"Easy for you to say! You're barely breaking a sweat. I feel like I'll collapse any second!" you wheeze, earning a hearty laugh from Hoseok.

You expected to be awkward and stiff with Hoseok. Sure, you were less socially inept now than you were back in the day, but typically you were more on the introvert side with anyone other than Yoongi. Hoseok' s extroversion, however, seemed to draw out your looser side, one that you kept with Yoongi more often than not. Hoseok was the exact opposite of you in every way, yet you didn't seem to mind. Before long you actually began to enjoy yourself.

"You're fine," Hoseok laughed, giving you a twirl as you spun back into his arms. "You're a natural, trust me."

"You try it in heels," you huff, rolling your eyes.

"Alright, alright. Let's go out for a drive then, Granny, since you're so beat," he said jokingly.

"Oh thank God!" You fell into his arms in mock exasperation, and before long he was taking you in his cruiser. You were sipping on a milkshake, your hair blowing in the wind until the two of you stopped at the destination. It was a small ledge overlooking a lake, the moonlight shining above it.

"Are we in Lovers Lane?" you questioned, looking around at the other cars, all with other teenagers making out.

"Er- Yeah. I hope you don't mind," Hoseok said sheepishly.

"No, it's cool. I guess it's to be expected for a date," you nodded, trying to remain calm despite the fact that your heart was thundering in your chest. You didn't feel threatened by Hoseok. After all, you could whip out a smell that would do anything from fill his mouth with maggots to make him fall in love with a nearby tree. Then why were you so nervous?

Hoseok yawned, stretching his arms over his head to casually wrap one around your shoulders. He wiggled his brows at you, the two of you sharing a grin. "Smooth," you say, chuckling.

"Can I... Can I kiss you?" Hoseok questioned. "It's alright if you say no, I understand."

"Um... Sure."

You weren't sure what you expected. Maybe you thought he'd shove his tongue down your throat and start groping you. That's what you braced yourself for, at least.

He was surprisingly gentle, his lips pressing against yours with hesitancy, moving to give you time to get used to it. He moved in a way that told you he had the experience, the small breaks in between making out short lived. It wasn't long until you kissed him back, squeezing your eyes shut as he slipped his tongue inside your mouth.

One of his hands came up to grope your chest, and you didn't hate the sensation. Despite Hoseok's body on yours, however, you could only think of someone else.

You broke free, taking a deep breath. "I can't."

Hoseok stopped, stilling for a moment before returning to his seat, respecting your boundaries. "Did I do something?"

"No, you've done nothing. You've been perfect- an absolute gentleman. I really enjoyed my time with you, trust me. It's just that I..."

There was a pause between the two of you, silence hanging in the air.

"You love Yoongi," Hoseok finished for you.

You took in a deep breath. "Yeah," you admitted quietly.

Hoseok was silent for a moment. "I understand. You don't have to feel bad or anything. It's not your fault, y'know? Feelings are feelings. They aren't something you can really control. You can control reactions but not feelings, at least that's what I understand."

"I'm sorry if I led you on," you apologized. "If it were any other time, I could see myself falling for you."

"How come you agreed to the date then?" He didn't seem angry, just curious.

You sighed. "I don't know. Maybe to get over him? Unrequited love is still love... It makes you do crazy things."

There were a few more seconds of silence before Hoseok started abruptly laughing. Tears were in his eyes, and he clutched his stomach. You fumed, looking to him. "What's so funny?"

"You're just so oblivious! Both of you!" Hoseok exclaimed. "Yoongi likes you, too. He's crazy about you. He looked like he wanted to kill me when I asked him if it was OK to ask you out. I just figured if he wouldn't make a move then I would- but this? This takes the cake!"

You froze at that, frosted but confused. "Yoongi likes me?"

"That's an understatement."

You blinked in surprise. "I... I had no clue. I thought I was just a friend to him."

"Don't worry, I'm sure he had the same doubts about your feelings towards him. I won't tell him, but I suggest you do," Hoseok smiled, his face warm. "After all, the night's still young, and so are we. Time is the one thing that you can't get back."

You smiled, giving him a peck on the cheek. "Thank you, Hoseok."

"Thanks for letting me cup a feel."

-

The last thing Yoongi had expected for you to do after your date was climb through his window.

He had been beating himself up all day for letting Hoseok ask you out, imagining the two of you doing god knows what. Why was he such a coward?

Yoongi liked you, yes, but his ego was too sensitive to handle the possibility of rejection. Especially at the prospect of losing his best friend.

He still thinks back on the day you told him you loved him. He had been so elated, your confession sounding so real until you corrected to yourself. You loved him as a friend. That's all he'd ever be to you.

So he kept it at that.

Still, it was surprising when you, a girl once so filled with anxiety she made him her soulmate to ensure he'd be silent about her secret, was the one who finally spoke up about the romantic tension between the two.

"Yoongi?"

The hoarse whisper woke him, and he rolled over, seeing you sitting on the windowsill, your finger lit like a candle to show a light. Your face was barely illuminated, and you stared at him through the dark.

The two of you had snuck in through each other's windows before. It was riskier for Yoongi, though, since he had parents and a little brother. It was easier for you because you could use levitation instead of climbing up vines similar to the ones that grow along the side of your house.

"Hey," he whispered back, sitting up and rubbing his eyes, trying to wake himself from his slumber-deprived state. "What's up? How was your... date with Hoseok."

"It was fine, I guess. I had a good time. It's over now," you said quietly.

"Shouldn't you be sleeping then? I'm sure he wore you out," Yoongi grumbled, trying to contain the bitterness in his voice.

Oddly enough, you revealed a small smile. "Sorry I just... I couldn't sleep."

"Wanna sleep next to me then?" Another common occurrence between you two.

"I can't. I mean, wait... No. It's not that," you said, sucking in a breath as you tried to find the right words. "I want to talk to you."

"Oh." Yoongi was fully awake now. "About what?"

"Us."

The word hung in the air for a moment, perspiring between the two of you as he soaked it in.

You were the first to break the silence. "Yoongi, I've been thinking about this for a long time. Four years, to be exact. You're my best friend, through and through, and our souls are bonded and such. But I know this doesn't have anything to do with that... What I feel for you isn't caused by any spell or potion or whatnot. I know I'm rambling but my point is that I can't see you as just a friend- or even a best friend for that matter. I've always seen you as more."

"I... I didn't know that." God, Yoongi was stupid. He had received confessions before, but something made his lungs squeeze with yours.

"I tried to go out with Hoseok. I tried to place my feelings for you onto him- yet when he kissed me I could only see you. I realized then that these feelings won't just fade. But what am I supposed to do then? Just... wait?

"You're going to leave for college in two years, and I'm going to leave for official witching school and whatnot around the same time. Our souls will be bonded, but even I know we only have a limited amount of time left before we'll have to separate- temporary or permanent. And I got to thinking why we never tried anything..." You let in a deep breath, as though trying to calm yourself. "I feel like a kid again, but I've been having thoughts of why we never even tried or discussed it. Stuff like you thinking I was ugly or weird and such and such... Long story short... Why haven't we tried... us?"

Yoongi thought about it for a moment and answered as honestly as he could. "I guess because I was scared."

"Scared?" you repeated, furrowing your brows. "Of me? Because I'm a witch?"

"No, not that," Yoongi clarified, slipping out of bed to step towards the window in front of you. He runs his hands through his messed up hair, a move that has your heart skip a beat. "Of us. You're my best friend, Y/N. You're my soulmate, literally. But what if you didn't like me back? What if we tried and it didn't work out? I didn't want to ruin everything we had built up. As you stated we only have two years left really, and then it's long distance. We'll still be bound, but how would that be if things were broken between us?"

"Yeah, you're right with those concerns," you nodded. "So... You've thought about it? Us being more than friends?"

"A lot," Yoongi admits. "More than I'd care to admit."

You chuckle a bit at that. "Me too."

You're silent for a few more moments before Yoongi speaks up. "So... we like each other or at least clarified it. Now what?"

You shrug at that. "That's up to us, I suppose. We can leave things as we are or... we can take a chance."

Your eyes meet, and Yoongi swallows hard. "Do you want to?"

"I really do. I don't think I've wanted anything more," you whisper quietly. "And you?"

"Same," he says softly. "I've wanted it for a long time."

He hadn't realized it, but the two of you had been moving closer and closer together, leaning in until your lips were mere centimeters apart. He could feel your soft breath, uneven.

Your unmatched hand reached for his own, shakily linking your fingers with his. "Yoongi?" you whisper, your voice faint as you stare into his eyes.

"Yeah?"

"I'm scared."

"Me too."

Your lips attach at that point, softly brushing up against each other before slotting into place, feathery light and gentle. Yoongi cups your face, fingers threading through your hair as he gives in. The light is out, the two of you kissing in the dark, the moonlight acting as your sole witness.

You pull back, your eyes glistening with tears, tiny droplets caught in your lashes. Yoongi gives you an expression of worry. "Was that ok? Did I go too far?"

"No, I just," you wipe away the tear, giving a shaky smile. "I'm just really happy to be here with you right now, y'know? I'm so, so happy."

"So you have to go crying on me?" Yoongi teases, earning a playful slap to the chest from you.

"Shut up and kiss me again, idiot."

-

You and Yoongi settled into the diner, both of you holding onto the laminated menu's. Despite his now tough reputation, Yoongi felt as though he was a preteen again. Why was he so nervous? The two of you had been dating for a while now and had been best friends for even longer. There was no reason for him to have a cow over this.

"Are you ok, Yoongi?" you questioned, your expression soft.

"What? Yes, I'm perfectly fine. Why do you ask?" he questioned, trying to compose himself to avoid worrying you.

"You seem to have something on your mind, I suppose," you mumble. "We don't have to go out, you know. It's alright to just hang out. I know you're going through a rough time, with your Mom's cancer and all."

That's right. Two weeks ago the doctor told them that his mother's cancer had resurfaced- a devastating blow for all of them. Truthfully Yoongi was struggling to hold himself together through all of it. The guys would lose their shit if they knew Yoongi bawled like a baby in your arms, but all that went through Yoongi's mind was the last time they had to give treatment to his mother. She had gone through so much pain, becoming frail and weak. The entire family suffered.

Yoongi shook the memory away, instead offering a smile. "No, that's not what I'm thinking about. Well, I mean I am, but I'm thinking about something else as well."

"Oh, well talk to me then. Anything to help," you offered.

You really had been there for him through this. From a shoulder to cry on to a potion here and there to help with sleep. You were a godsend.

"Well, I was imagining this in a more romantic way, I suppose. Let's wait until the waiter comes."

You nodded, the waiter soon coming along to get your order. It was after the waiter dropped off the cherry cokes and cheeseburgers that you stared at Yoongi expectantly. "So? What is it?"

Yoongi sucked in a harsh breath. It didn't matter how much grease he had in his hair, how fast his car was, or how many leather jackets he wore- he was weak to the knees when it came to you.

He dug out a small pin from his pocket. "I figured since we were going steady, I'd finally get around to giving you this."

Your eyes widened with delight. "Your class pin?"

It was a big step in your relationship, that was for sure. Branded you as his in a sense, showed you were going steady. Official and all that jazz, so to speak. Yoongi nodded, and you squealed, leaning over the table to let him place the pin over your left breast, right above your heart.

You smiled warmly, giving him a peck on the lips before settling in your seat. You reached forward, placing his hands in your own. Yoongi's face went red, and his eyes did an automatic scan, making sure no one he knew was around to witness. He only got this soft for you.

"No matter what, we'll go through this together, ok? I'm here for you no matter what," you told him, your tone sincere.

"No matter what," he agreed wholeheartedly.

-

The two of you are 18 when you get your letters from college.

Dear Y/N, of the Mortem clan,

You are cordially invited to Magia, Academy for Witches and Wizards,

Your semester will start next fall. As it is a boarding institution, housing and food will be provided. We expect you to bring clothing and other necessities that you'll need for your studies. We've devised your schedule based on your skill set and heritage. Below will be the courses for the semester.

Intro to Familiars Advanced Potions Advanced Necromancy Standard Defense Spells Standard Charms Intro to Astronomy and Fortune Telling

We look forward to seeing you in the new school year.

Sincerely, Magia, Academy for Witches and Wizards

Yoongi stared down at the letter, analyzing it. He cleared his throat. "So, you're going, huh?"

"It's more or less mandatory. You're accepted if you've got magical abilities, regardless of whether or not you applied. They were always going to keep an eye on me because of my clan, anyway."

"Mortem? That's not your last name."

"Yes, but it's my bloodline. I've mentioned before how each family focuses on a single specialty- and that's the family I come from."

"What about familiars and necromancy? We've never practiced those."

"Familiars are usually something you dive into once you're of age. Difficult to handle one when you're only a teen. It's essentially a companion- a creature or animal that is by your side to help you with magic. You're spiritually linked, similar to how you and I are."

"And the necromancy?"

"Something I'll supposedly excel at, I suppose. The board of the academy typically knows more than I do," you shrug. "Now let me see yours."

It wasn't anything special, really. Just a letter to let Yoongi know he was accepted at the nearby college. Nevertheless, he handed you the letter, letting you analyze it. He tried to imagine you going to a normal college, learning normal topics. Perhaps the two of you would share a dorm together. Perhaps not. No matter how hard he tried to picture it, he knew you wouldn't be at place in the human setting.

"I'm really proud of you, Yoongi. It's a really good college- plus you'll be close to your mom. You worked hard for this. I didn't have to work for mine, but you really put yourself into this," you say, handing back the letter. "I know you'll do great things."

"Don't talk as though we'll be separated. I'm not sure if they'll let me visit witching school or whatever, but I'm sure you'll be able to drop by once in a while. Though  mine isn't nearly as impressive, I'm sure."

"We're bonded- we couldn't really even separate even if we tried," you hum softly.

Yoongi's quiet for a moment. He knew what you said was true, but the thought of you two being thousands of miles apart filled him with a sensation of melancholy. "Promise you'll send a letter every day? Or call?"

"I'll be sure to send a link through Maximus- he'll be coming with me. Not sure if you know but he's transportable, and the good thing about fire demons is they can help you communicate even through regular fire. I wouldn't recommend calling through your fireplace, but I'll give you a list of instructions to call me through a candle or something."

"God, just when I think that I've started to know a thing or two about magic, you surprise me with something else," Yoongi laughs.

The laughter dies, and your thoughts are tangible, hanging in the air.

"Well, we'll have to make the most of our summer," you note softly. "We'll stay in contact and all, but I know it won't be the same."

"You're not thinking about breaking up, are you?" Yoongi questions.

"No. But I'd understand if you'd want to. We're young- we're going to meet new people. You're very good with people and lord knows girls can't resist your type. I trust you, but I'd understand if you'd want something a bit more present. There's a lot I still won't be able to provide for you from miles away, and I'd understand. I'd love you no matter what and I'd wait for you," you tell him.

"No way. I don't want anyone other than you, and you should know that. We can make it work," he argues.

You shrug dully. "I know. I just... I don't want to hold you back, y'know? From a normal life just because you're with me. That kind of lifestyle isn't really obtainable with me, with how different we are."

"If I wanted normal I wouldn't have pestered you years ago, Y/N, you know that. Besides, if anything I'd think I'm holding you back from your true potential as a witch."

"That's a lie and you know it," you smile. "You've brought me out of my shell and much more. None of it would've been attainable without you."

"Well you bring out the potential in me, too," he replies.

"You're young, Yoongi. We're 18- do you really know what you want? Our whole lives are ahead of us- jobs, relationships, everything. Are we really ready for that commitment? To make those big decisions?" You think for a moment, sullen at the prospect of a life you don't want. "I don't want to be something you regret."

"Hey, look at me," Yoongi says, holding your hands in his and squeezing tightly. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, you know that? Who cares if we're young. We've got our whole lives ahead of us, sure, but I don't want to go through it without you."

"Are you sure about that, Yoongi? Forever's a long time. You might feel differently once I'm away," you tell him.

"I'll prove it. We can get married- right now! Go to a chapel and elope before the school year starts."

You laugh outright at that- a hearty, true one. "Now we're definitely too young for that."

"How so? My mom was pregnant with me when we were her age."

"Are you telling me you plan to knock me up, Yoongs?"

"Eventually, yeah. Maybe once we're older, though," he says

You smile, stroking his cheek before kissing him tenderly. "I'm going to miss you, you big idiot," you tell him, pressing your forehead against his.

"You're not gone yet," he reminds you, combing his fingers through your hair. "We've got all summer, baby, and then some."

"Let's make the most of it."

-

The two of you were watching the new release of Romeo and Juliet at a drive-in theater, the two of you sitting in the backseat of Yoongi's cruiser, his arm slung over your shoulders as he pulled you close to him. The summer air had cooled a few degrees along with the night, the screen illuminating along with the moon.

"Y'know, I never liked this play. Kill me, I mean it's still his best, but like... Weren't they kids? They were pulling some Lolita shit back then, too," Yoongi notes, his eyes on the screen. All you could do was giggle in response.

You loved these kinds of dates with Yoongi. It was the first date he took you on, now that you recall. The two of you were watching a reshowing of The Sound of Music, a movie Yoongi would later tell you he could barely tolerate despite Julie Andrews' brilliant performance.

Now that you think about it, a drive-in movie was also the first time the two of you had begun to get physical. You could recall the moment as if it were yesterday- the two of you watching some new Disney film as he fingered you in the car.

You felt heat pool in your stomach, and your thighs press together. You turn to him, nuzzling your nose into the crook of his neck affectionately before giving small sucks and nibbles. It was always your tell, as you both knew it riled him up.

Yoongi sucked in a harsh breath. "Baby, can't we wait until after the movie?"

"But Daddy..."

Yoongi tensed.

That was it- the golden word. There was a fine line between Yoongi and Daddy, and it was whenever you said the magic word that the beast would be unleashed. You still remember how you had teased him, on a night before you two had even started dating. You both snuck his dad's beer and went onto the rooftop, drinking about what it'd be like once the two of you were older. Somehow the topic got to kinks, a taboo subject for your time. Hell, people weren't even supposed to say the word pregnant on TV! And yet the two of you whispered and giggled, and he confessed in a drunken state that he always had a thing for the term, something he had learned from one of his male friends.

After delving into your sex life together, you found out you liked it too.

"You sure you want to do this right here, baby? Where anyone can see?"

"I'll be quiet," you promise, flicking your tongue over the curve of his jaw. "I want you."

"I've got such an insatiable slut, don't I?" he questions, his voice a low rasp as he soon pins you down in the back seat. You suck in your breath, the two of you diving out of view from other movie goers. Still, if they were to walk over and see what was going on in the convertible, you two would be dead.

All worries pass, however, as Yoongi hitches your shirt up over your bra, revealing your underwear beneath the layers of fabric. He's quick to stuff your bra over your tits, letting them spill out, your panties landing on the car floor shortly after. Still, your dress remained on, quick to put down in case someone were to see what was happening.

Yoongi presses his lips against yours, his long fingers traveling down your body. You mewl as the digits slide up your folds, toying with your clit in a way that had your legs quiver on either side fo him. He played with you for a bit, swallowing any delicious moans that dared to escape your lips, before plunging a finger inside.

"So wet already, huh?" He chuckles, adding another without hesitation. "But we've got to be quick, babe. Can't let anyone else see what's mine, isn't that right? You know what that means."

You nod, your eyes wide with anticipation. "Please eat my ass, Daddy."

"How can I say no to that?" He smirks, spreading your legs wide to bury his face between your thighs. Upon closer inspection, he notices that some of your arousal had started to spill down your cheeks, adding as an extra bit of lube for his upcoming meal. "My messy little girl. You're gonna make a mess of the car, aren't you?"

You aren't even able to pathetically whine once his tongue is lapping over the puckered hole, collecting the juices that had dribbled down. He let it lay on his tongue, not swallowing a single drop before the pink muscles started to work around the rim, slowly entering the puckered hole.

The easiest way to get you wet was for him to eat your ass- nothing turned you on more. Perhaps it was because of how good it surprisingly felt, the lewdness of it all, or just the fact that Yoongi was doing it. Nevertheless, you shudder as a result, gushing for him so that more arousal landed on his awaiting tongue.

By the time he was done his face was drenched, from the tip of his nose being buried in your cunt to the bottom of his chin. He was a delectable sight, and you welcomed him with open arms as he smashed his lips against yours. You buried your hands through the gelled up locks, gripping onto the leather sleeves as he undoes his belt.

You feel the blunt head of his cock running along your folds, and you buck your hips up eagerly to meet his. He pushes inside, finding it an easy, though snug fit. The two of you moan, though his hand clasps over your mouth to silence you.

"Shh, pretty girl. You're gonna have to be real quiet for Daddy, ok? I'm gonna fuck you nice and hard, just like you wanted, but you can't make a single peep."

You nod dumbly, his palm still on your lips as he begins to rock into you. Your eyes roll at the delicious feeling, his pelvic bone pressing against you in just the right way. It doesn't take long for him to find his rhythm, and a few seconds more and he finds your sweet spot, hitting it again and again once he knows he found it.

"You're such a -mmf- good fu-fucking girl for Daddy, aren't you?" He grunts with each thrust, feeling the way your nails rake into his arms even throguh the leather. "My good little witch, huh?"

Your pussy clenches around him like a vice, sucking him back in as your hips rock back against his. You're sure by now people can notice the car rocking back and forth along with his thrusts, seeing how much force and vigor he's putting into it. You don't care though, the upcoming bliss threatening to push you over the edge.

"Are you close for Daddy already?" he questions, his voice a low rasp. "Are you gonna come all over this cock? Cream on my dick and get me nice and wet?"

Your eyes roll back once he places the hand that was on your mouth instead along the column of your throat, lightly squeezing. Your impending high comes over you as he pulls out, his hand repeatedly slapping against your quivering cunt as juices started to spray over him, ruining his pants and the car seats along with it. Yoongi didn't seem to care much, though. It wasn't the first time you squirted all over the nice seats- but there were helpful spells for that.

"Fuck, that's it, soak me, baby. Look what a mess my nasty little girl made for her Daddy," he cooes.

You ride the high, your breath uneven as you feel the bliss slowly die down, a comfortable, post-orgasmic buzz still looming through you.

"You alright, Y/N? You came pretty hard," Yoongi cooes, his dominant persona halting in place of your considerate boyfriend.

You still see the straining erection, though, glistening in the moonlight with your juices.

You beckon him closer, curling your fingers in mid-air similar to how he was inside of you. "You didn't get to cum."

"It's alright, baby. You don't have to-"

"No, I want to. Come up here and fuck my face."

God, how could he say no to that face? Without further hesitation or protest, he climbs up your body, straddling your face. Your hands come up to his ass, sitting him down as you return the favor, your tongue lapping over the pink rim and scrotum as he holds his cock up, stroking the shaft so that it didn't land on your forehead.

Once you're done eating his ass, you suck at his balls, knowing that's what really got him going. He let out a guttural moan, still hunched over you so that no one else would see.

"Fuck, Daddy's got a big load for you, baby. Think it's time I fuck that pretty mouth of yours." He scoots down some, placing his dick in your mouth as you relax your throat, signaling for him to begin.

He bucks into your mouth, his hips pointed down as he hovers over your face, listening closely to the sounds of you sucking him into your throat to take all of him. His pelvis lightly tapped the tip of your nose as he sunk down as far as he could, careful not to injure you in the process. You closed your eyes shut, focused on the sensation from his dick deep in your throat to the fine hair that brushed against your face.

"Fuck fuck fuck, I'm gonna cum."

Yoongi doesn't take long, and it's just when you feel your lungs about to collapse that he spills his load, the bitter liquid spilling down the column of your throat.

He climbs off of you as you swallow his cum, sucking in greedy breaths as he readjusts your clothing to its proper place.

"Are you ok? I think I was a bit too rough," he says, brushing the side of your cheek to examine the mascara that was smudged around your eyes.

"I'm alright," you laugh, your voice having a twinge of a rasp. You can't help but smile at his concern, but the moment is quickly ruined when you hear your names being called.

"Shit," Yoongi says, fixing you up one last time before making sure he's decent.

You're surprised to see his little brother, Yohan, run up to the car, screaming Yoongi's name at the top of his lungs, drawing attention to you.

"What do you want, ankle-biter?" Yoongi says, clearly annoyed that his 15-year-old brother was here when you two were supposed to be on a date. "Aren't you supposed to be-"

"Mom is dead."

Yoongi freezes, his eyes as wide as saucers as he stares at Yohan in disbelief.

"What?"

-

Yoongi cried on your shoulder the entire time during the funeral. Unlike his brother, still very concerned with the image of masculinity and strength, refusing to shed a single tear no matter how many welled up in his eyes, Yoongi sobbed. His body shook as he stared hopelessly at the casket, letting you hold him in your arms. He was so faded, a mere husk.

He couldn't so much as let out a single smile, still coping with his mother's death. He let his precious jackets gather dust and his hair had gotten drab without the products he usually had. His friends had given him the space he needed, though would occasionally drop by to check on him. They knew that just a few weeks, however, wouldn't be enough for their friend to move on.

The woman who raised him was gone forever. He believed he'd never see her again. He thought to his younger brother, who his mother would never teach to drive, who would never get the special birthday cake once he finally turned sixteen. Yoongi still remembered how embarrassed he was when his mother insisted on celebrating the event, even calling upon you to help her make it for the party. All of his friends came, insisting it was the best cake they ever had, and despite Yoongi's protests against the idea, he couldn't help but agree. The then 13-year-old Yohan had simply whined that he didn't get his own cake, and their mother promised she'd make one for him once he was of age.

He'd never get it, though.

You'd drop by the most, bringing food and caring for his family. His father spent most of his nights out at the bar, drinking himself to sleep until he had to go to work the next day. His little brother, on the other hand, preoccupied himself with everything else, joining sports and hanging out with friends as though to distract himself. You would give Mr. Min a special hangover cure, (what he didn't know was made of frog spit and unicorn blood), and you'd make sure to carry Yohan to his bed when he passed out on the couch after exhausting himself.

Yoongi was the most work admittedly. You were the one the boys often went to when they wanted updates on how Yoongi was. You had to make sure he ate and showered, caring for himself as he moped about the house on those hot summer days. You two hadn't kissed, hugged, or made love since his mother's death. You didn't pester him, however, as you understood more than anyone else the meaning behind the absence of a parent. Perhaps if Yoongi had a clearer head he would've appreciated your efforts more, how you never once complained or gave up on him.

It took you a while to understand exactly how to act around him. Over the course of a month, you had become less of his girlfriend and barely even a best friend to more of a caretaker. You became responsible for him in a sense, becoming stern as you made sure he ate right and went out into the sun every once in a while, whether he wanted to or not.

At first, you wondered how you should treat him. Should you joke with him as friends? Should you give him affection as a girlfriend?

It didn't seem he really needed either of those right now, though. You didn't want to replace his mother by any means, but no one else was looking out for him, and he was so distraught that he didn't feel the need to function properly.

It was at those desperate times that desperate measures were taken.

You had made yourself scarce lately, though still worked efficiently. Yoongi began to wonder if he should break up with you, for the time being, knowing that it was unfair for you to have to deal with this much pressure and care for him beyond necessary. He wasn't being the best boyfriend, admittedly, but it was hard for him to put effort into anything with the grief consuming him.

He had been pondering calling you to discuss a break in the relationship until he sorted things out when knocked on his bedroom door. His mother had given you a house key years before, and with how things have been lately, you've been using it frequently.

"I need to show you something."

"Y/N, I was just about to call you."

"I know- I sensed a bit of it. You're a bit more distressed than usual."

Ah, yes, another part of the soulmate thing. Intense emotions could be sensed at certain times, sort of like a ringing in the back of the head or a tingling sensation. You were far more in tune with it than Yoongi was, being able to decipher what means what.

"I think we need to talk," he says, his voice slow. He took in a deep breath, despite how much it hurt him knowing that he'd have to do this. You weren't going ot be happy about this either, but knowing you, you'd understand. You've been more than understanding so far, but it was unfair for him to drag you through this.

You sat on his bed beside him, brushing your fingers tenderly across his cheek. "Alright. Say what you need to, Yoongs. I'll listen."

"I just don't want you to be upset."

You sucked in a harsh breath, as though already sensing what he wanted to tell you. "I promise I won't get frosted, if that's what you're worried about," you assure him, trying to tug a weak smile up.

Yoongi looked in his lap, piercing pain in his chest as his heart seemed to break for the second time. "I think we should break up."

He saw how you tried to look unaffected, though you were clearly bracing yourself for it. From your stiff posture to your sucked in a breath, you weren't surprised. Still, you weren't happy about it either.

"Okay," is all you say, a quiet voice.

"Call it a break or whatever you want- anything that makes you feel better. I still love you- I'm still in love with you- but this is unfair to you. You shouldn't have to take care of me like my mother did just because I can't seem to pick myself up. It's cruel of me to drag you through this since I can't prioritize our relationship right now."

"Oh, Yoongi, you should know that I'd do this even if we weren't dating." Why were you two crying now? You had fast, hot tears rolling down your face, despite the fact you had anticipated this. He had slow, cold tears that didn't even make it into his lap, despite the fact that he had been thinking about this for days. You shakily reach up to the pin above your heart, taking it down and putting it in his hands, closing his fingers around the small item. For two years, you had worn that over your heart every single day, no matter how it clashed with your outfits or how odd it looked. It seemed strange to see you without it, at this point. "Broken up or not, we're still best friends. Soulmate, in fact."

Yoongi cried, squeezing onto the small pin to the point that it hurt, his knuckles turning white as he threatened to draw blood. "I'm sorry," he weeped. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I love you so much- you shouldn't have to deal with this- with me."

"Yoongi," you say, your voice a plea as you wrap your body around his, shaking as well. "It's alright,  understand. You're not alone."

He buries his face in your neck, ruining your blouse as he hugs you tightly, both of you crying and shaking, listening to your sobs and heartbeats becoming one.

You pet his hair, and after what felt like hours of you two embracing one another as your emotions flooded the room, it all seemed to come to a standstill. It was as though a river didn't have a single drop of water left, barren and dry once everything had left it.

"Yoongi?" you whispered, your tone soft. "I still have that thing to show you."

"Are you sure you still want to show me it?" he questions, his voice a mere rasp.

You nod, a weak smile pulling at your lips. "Positive. It's more magic stuff- perhaps it'll cheer you up."

You two hadn't been doing much of it lately, the most being whenever he wanted to turn into a cat so that you could hold him, reminding him of his mother's embrace when she'd lull him to sleep as a toddler. But this was far more than the typical magic you two would indulge in.

Far more.

You left Yoongi's house, a new sense of determination filling you. You had been preparing for this for a while- and it was now that you had to put your plan into action. Now was the time to truly begin your legacy.

You entered your house, which was darker than usual. It no longer teemed with life as it once did, the only light being Maximus, who glowed as nothing more than a small, dull flame.

"Y/N," he croaked, his plea desperate. "I've seen how it's consumed your parents- your entire family before. I know you won't be like them, but you won't be in the ways you need to be. Don't do this."

You give him a stern glare, your face stony. Giving no reply, you reach your hand into the flame, a sharp hiss leaving your lips as you flipped over a piece of coal, the ground below you sinking.

The dungeon that resided below- your parents' favorite place. You had little memory of it when you were younger, as it had frightened you then. Now that you were older, however, it gave you a much more homey feeling, as though this was where you belonged.

Your hand glided over the forbidden pages, scrolls, and textbooks. You didn't need to study these as rigorously as you did everything else, no doubt. This ran in your veins. You were a master at this craftsmanship before you even performed your first spell.

You looked over what you needed, potions and materials that were hard to come by- many of which were illegal in the witching community.

Sliding your oversized goggles over your face, you flipped over the thickest textbook, opening the bookmarked page as dust flew about. Coughing, you looked through the ancient text deciphering the code as you tried to collect yourself.

You had no doubt this would run smoothly.

But that's what you were afraid of.

Taking a silver dagger, you began the ritual, cutting along the upper half of your inner arm, at the bicep, letting the fresh blood pool onto the floor. You smeared the blood onto your hands, painting the floor with the liquid until you made a pentagram.

You bandaged yourself up quickly, the cut not deep enough to cause a mortal wound, but deep enough to sting. Flurrying about the room, you looked for the ingredients. You took a cow's eye and smooshed it into your bloody hands until it was the consistency of applesauce. Next, you took the heart of a virgin, the wings of a fairy, a jar of mist, and a vial of Yoongi's blood. You placed each ingredient at a point on the pentagram.

Yes, it was done exactly as instructed. A pentagram of blood, from the witch who calls upon thee. A cow's eye ground like mush, to help one see beyond. A virgin's heart, pure enough for the blackest of souls to desire. The wings of a fairy, ripped from her so she may never fly again. A jar of mist, a direct source from the limbo between life and death. And lastly the blood of a mortal, who must be related to thee.

You took a piece of parchment, writing the name of who you wanted to call upon, before lighting it on fire with a flame from Maximus in the center of the pentagram. The fire spread from the center to the points, each of the ingredients flying up into smoke along with the blood, until the floor was completely clean.

Your heart hammered in your ears, the lump in your throat making it hard for you to so much as swallow as you stared at the smoke. It condensed, packing itself tightly together as though to break the laws of physics until the black turned into color, and you looked before at the figure, stark as the day it was born.

You didn't dare to look at it, not wanting to think, and not wanting to feel. You threw the clothes you had prepared, stolen from Yoongi's home, though no one even noticed. You banished the figure from your premises, ordering what it should do. It would walk downhill until it was at a house of great familiarity, and it would forget the day entirely and a little before.

So imagine Yoongi's surprise when his mother stood before his front door, smiling as brightly as the afternoon sun, looking more youthful than ever before.

-

He couldn't figure it out.

It was explained as some sort of grand mistake- whether it was miss-identification, a miracle, or lord knows what. He didn't care what the explanation was, for his mother was back.

He didn't believe it at first, dragging her to her grave, though finding it completely undisturbed. A sinking feeling in his stomach told him that if he were to dig deep and open the casket, his mother's corpse wouldn't be in there. After all, she was standing beside him.

But could he call it a corpse? She looked better than he could even remember. More alive than before. She was healthy and happy, a youthful glow she couldn't attain back when she was sick.

Everyone accepted it without further questions, as though put under a haze, a veil of ignorance draped before their eyes.

But Yoongi didn't have the fortune of being blinded by said blissful blessing.

After a week's time of staring at his mother and confirming she was, in fact, alive and present (though she had no memory of her death or how she came back), he marched to your house. He had been so preoccupied he didn't even think to come to you, his now ex-girlfriend, to decipher how you had pulled off this fantastical feat.

He soon discovered, however, that it wasn't fantastic in the slightest.

You had a gaunt expression, almost skeletal. You were faded, the blood drained from your face. You looked sickly and tired, as though the life was being sucked out of you.

You gave him a smile once you locked eyes.

"Merry Christmas," you say jokingly, though you cough and sputter afterward. It took a lot of energy for you to even bring yourself to this, and here you were suffering the consequences.

"Y/N," Yoongi said, reaching up to your face, cradling it in his hands as his eyes searched you for clues. "What happened?"

"A bit of a flu, perhaps," you excuse, closing the door behind you.

"This isn't a flu," he snaps, worry straining his voice. "What happened to you? What did you do? How'd you bring my mother back?"

Your legs were wobbly, and you shook with great force before collapsing into Yoongi's arms. He caught you easily, finding you lighter than before, as though you had lost a tremendous amount of weight in the past week. He carried you to the living room, the place lifeless and dull.

It was at that moment you burst out crying.

"Y/N? Y/N, please tell me what's going on? Are you ok? What happened?" The color drained from his face. "Y/N... what did you do?"

"What I had to," you whisper. "I'm so sorry, Yoongi, I've been lying to you this entire time. The entire time we've known each other, it's all been just one big fat lie. I should've told you sooner."

He stands up, eyes wide as he looks at you in horror. "What? What lie?"

You wipe your tears, staring him in the face. "My parents were never dead, Yoongi. They never could be, really."

"What?" His mind is muddled and disoriented, everything vertigo. "What do you mean?"

You chuckle lowly, though it's humorless in every sense of the word. "Do you remember when you first came to this house, love? Before I told you a single thing about my magic?"

"Yes?" He was hesitant, unsure of where you were getting at.

You pointed one gnarled finger, and he followed the direction, his eyes landing on what you indicated.

His stomach dropped.

"The painting?"

You nod, more tears falling from your face when you recounted the memory. "My family is of the Mortem Clan, one of the most powerful in all of witch history, but also one of the most dangerous and evil. Mortem is Latin for death, and we were feared throughout all of our lives by the other clans. We were the devil worshipers that many were falsely accused of being. Necromancers. We specialize in death, from killing to reviving. Torturing souls until they drop dead only to bring them back to life and do it all over again. We'd bring back greedy kings who wanted to rule forever, and we'd bring back our worst enemies who couldn't even beg for death. That is my own family talent.

"We are especially good at it, in every sense of the word. It runs throguh our veins as the Nile runs through Egypt. You cannot escape your bloodline, no matter how you escape your family. I'm the most talented of all, supposedly, and the last of my generation. No other exists, whether it's because some of my relatives were cursed, or because they couldn't find a suitable partner. We're a vain type, between you and me; prideful despite the flaws that society illuminated.

"Witches aren't even supposed to live among mortals, but my parents figured it'd be best for me to grow up someplace where I wouldn't be feared. As you well know, though, another family talent appears to be being shunned. Nevertheless, they wanted a quiet life- or at least my father was. After the war, he simply wanted to settle down, but he had fallen in love with a Mortem; a simple life was never in the cards.

"My mother fell for him too, oddly enough, but when it came to me she put her foot down. I had magical abilities despite my human father, and great ones at that. By the time I could walk I had risen a cow from the dead. I was exceedingly well at it, of course, and my mother was proud, and my father was supportive as always.

"Everything changed when I was eleven, though. My mother had brought a young woman, lulled by either seduction or deceit into our home, from another town so that we wouldn't be suspected. My mother slit her throat in front of me, as though it were a cruel practice lesson. She urged me to raise her from the dead, but I had been so traumatized and frozen, I couldn't do it. Perhaps now I would've but she put too much faith in me. My magic was of a God's, but my brain was still of a little girl's. Besides, I had known that if I did revive the woman, she'd be subjected to the same fate over and over again.

"The details are hazy, but I remember my mother screaming and shaking me, and my father coming close to help calm her down. I was so overwhelmed that my magic simply burst, a spell no one knew. Before I knew it my parents were trapped in a painting, and even after all these years I haven't found out how to get them out."

You stared at the painting with a sullen look, your mother's eyes narrowing as you recounted events, her glare meeting yours. Your father only offered a sympathetic look, placing his hand on his wife's shoulder to hold her close to him.

You blinked away tears, both you and  Yoongi diverting your attention to one another. "You don't deserve a liar, Yoongi. I had never felt so alone before, and you came in. It was a mistake getting our souls tied together, but at that point I was desperate. I had no friends, and now no family. You could've had a nice mortal girl to become your high school sweetheart, but instead, you got me, nothing more than a dangerous liar. I didn't tell you because I didn't want to scare you off, and after on I figured it was too late."

"Y/N, what happened wasn't your fault. It's your mother's for putting you in that situation. Of course you'd feel overwhelmed at eleven," Yoongi reasons.

"Perhaps, but it is my fault for keeping the secret from you all these years. There's no one else to blame but me."

Yoongi's quiet at that. "I suppose. What changed though? You seemed to use every other spell now that I think about it."

"After the traumatizing experience, I had vowed never to dive into my true talent- especially when I had you. I didn't want to mess things up any further by getting you involved in dark magic. I knew if I told you the truth about necromancy you'd ask why I didn't bring my parents back, and everything would start to unravel. But then your mother died, and I love you so much Yoongi- I figured I owed you at least that much."

"Why are you so frail and sickly, though?"

You laughed bitterly at that. "Death has a price in all shapes and ways, a fashion that will never go out of style, no matter how much time passes. Raising a human from the dead is an amazing feat; therefore, it requires just as an amazing of a sacrifice. Some say it's because those who are in Death's embrace should remain in his arms, others say it's because he wants there to be balance in the scales. The Mortem clan does the devil's work of giving a steady flow of souls in and out of hell, so there's a simple rule: take a soul, give a soul. Long story short, in order to keep your mother here I must sacrifice a soul by the next full moon. If not, my own life will be the one taken, and I'll be seated at the right side of Lucifer with the rest of my ancestors."

Yoongi froze. "You can't mean that."

You were silent.

He grabs onto you, as though trying to grip both you and him to reality. "You mean you'll die within, what, a few days? No, Y/N, you can't die. I won't let you. I love you, goddammit."

"You love your mother, too," you say, pushing his hands off of you with what little strength you had, tears falling down your chin to slide along the curve of your jaw. You could barely even look at him. "You were destroyed when she was gone. I had to bring her back."

"I'll be destroyed when you're gone too! No, what am I saying, when? If! No, you won't be gone, I won't allow it."

"You deserve a good girl who won't lie to you, who you can have a normal life with. We'll be far apart once we're in school anyway, and I don't want to hold you back. With my death, our souls will be untethered, and you'll be free to live your life as it was meant to be: without me. A devil's servant isn't what you deserve by any means. This was the least I could do for burdening you for so long."

"Burden?" He laughed bitterly. "You're the love of my goddamn life, Y/N. We'll get a sacrifice to replace you and my mother, but I'm not letting go of you. We're soulmates even without the spell, goddammit. We were meant to meet, we were meant to be friends, we were meant to fall in love. I won't hesitate to get someone else-"

"No," you say, your hand on his chest. You stared him in the eye. "The witch who performed the ritual must replace the soul herself, and I refuse to kill anyone. That is the one moral I'll hold onto. I'll replace your mother in the realm of the dead, I'll take her place. It's about time my clan ended, anyways."

"No!" Yoongi was sobbing, hugging onto you tightly. You were limp, letting him, though you couldn't even embrace him back. "I won't let you! Y/N, you're the girl I was planning to marry."

"Was," you muse. "You're already beginning to become accustomed to the idea, it seems. A Freudian slip."

"I didn't mean-"

"Shh." You place your hand over his mouth, no longer crying, a look of contentment on your face. "Be happy, Yoongi. Don't let my sacrifice go to waste. I'll love you from even down below. They used to say that us Mortem don't have hearts, that we don't even have souls, but I know that to be true, for no soulless, heartless being can lover another with the capacity that I love you."

-

Tomorrow.

Tomorrow you'd die.

It had been three days time since you told him the truth- the complete truth. In that time his mother had brought joy to the family, all traces of grief gone when she so much as smiled. Each day Yoongi went to you, begging you to save yourself so that you could be together.

Each time you refused.

There was one thing you had said, however, that stuck with him.

"Raising a human from the dead is an amazing feat; therefore, it requires just as an amazing of a sacrifice. Some say it's because those who are in Death's embrace should remain in his arms, others say it's because he wants there to be balance in the scales."

According to that, the only way to save you from having to sacrifice yourself would be to take away the need for a sacrifice.

AKA, have his mother return to the realm of the dead.

Not exactly like he got a kick out of the idea, of course. He found himself between a rock and a hard place, a strange place of limbo as he looked between the two options.

Essentially he had to choose either you or his mother.

His mind spun, and he tried to collect his thoughts. On one hand one of the possible reasons for the need of a sacrifice is that the dead should stay dead. On the other hand, you yourself told him to make your sacrifice worthwhile.

So here he was, a kitchen knife in hand in the dead of night, the waxing moon looming over him as though to make his decision.

He closed his eyes, and there were two things he'd see. The first image was of his mother's corpse in the open casket, her skin becoming grey and her lips becoming blue as she slowly began to rot. Her skin and flesh would melt away until only a skeleton remained.

The second image was of you, what he had seen today. You looked similar to his mother's corpse, on the brink of death, unable to so much as rise from your bed. You couldn't even be called a dead girl walking, and instead reminded him of an elderly woman on her death bed, not at all like the young, vibrant teen you were but a few weeks before.

It was an impossible decision. His mother or his girlfriend? (Technically ex-girlfriend).

He walked down to the kitchen to get himself a midnight snack, still pondering over the two options when to his surprise he saw his mother. She was collecting the dishes, humming a lovely melody, as content as could be.

She looked at him, her face brightening up. "Oh, Yoongi, my sweet boy! What're you doing up at this hour? I know it's summer and all, but I don't want this to become a habit."

Yoongi hid the knife behind his back, staring at her. "Oh... I just wanted a snack."

She shook her head, smiling as she ruffled his hair with delight. "You want to help me make Yohan's cake? I've got some of the ingredients, but it'll take a few days to make. I can't believe my little boys are growing up so fast!"

That's right- Yohan would finally be able to taste his mother's special cake on his sixteenth birthday.

"You know, it was just yesterday when you were as big as my thigh- you were as long as my knee to my hip, you know that? My precious baby boy, how could I forget?" She cooed at him softly, stroking his face with affection. "You boys are the light of my life, you know that? I know I don't get to say it often since you two are teens and don't want your mother babying you... but I'll never love anything more than you two. You're my everything, and I hope you two find a purpose to your life the way I found mine in yours. You're what kept me fighting- even throguh cancer."

Yoongi felt a lump in his throat, tears welling up in his eyes, slipping down his cheeks. He felt as though he had been crying far too much recently. By now he should be out of tears.

His mother's thumb swiped over the tear, catching it as she gave him a tender smile. "Tears, Yoongi? It's alright, Mom's here. I'll always be here."

"I know," he choked out, his voice cracking.

Her eyes began to well up too, and she wiped any tears away. "Gosh, I don't know why I'm crying. Silly me."

"Mom?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"Ca-an I have a hug?"

"Of course, my sweet boy." She wrapped her arms around him tightly, and he buried his face in her hair. Despite the fact he was taller than her by a great margin, he still felt like the little boy who needed an embrace from his mother after getting bullied on the playground. She stroked his hair softly, her warmth enveloping him entirely. "I love you more than anything in the world, Yoongi. Never forget that."

"I love you too, Mom."

With that, he raised the blade, plunging the knife into her back.

-

When you woke up, you felt like yourself again. Looking down at your arms, they seemed young and fresh, no longer just skin and bones. A new sense of energy had regenerated you, youth showing in your face again. You no longer resembled death incarnate, but at that reminder, your heart sunk.

You knew why.

You ran to down the stairs, fully intent on going to Yoongi's to question what had happened. To your surprise he was on the couch, blood staining his clothes, a dark look in his eye.

"Yoongi?"

His head snapped to turn to you, and before you knew it he was running to you, his lips smashing against yours. You tasted tears and blood, but you returned the kiss, missing the taste of him that lingered beneath the odd mixture against his lips. It had been so long since you kissed him.

You break free, eyes searching and questioning his expressions. "Yoongi..."

"I did." It was a short phrase, only two words and syllables, but you knew.

You held him tightly, burying your face in his chest, feeling his tears weave into your hair. You two are silent for a minute, soaking up the moment. Ultimately it was Yoongi who truly had to make the sacrifice. He chose you over his own mother.

"I'm sorry," you croak out.

"No- don't be. The dead are supposed to stay dead. It's cruel to keep her in this world when you get to it. At least I got to tell her I loved her one last time. My family and I will have to cope, but we'll find a way. We can't stay focused on the past, we can only learn and appreciate it for what it was. We have to live not only in the present but also for the future. You're both of those things for me, Y/N. My mother lived out her purpose in life, and I don't think yours was to die on account of my own grief."

"I'll help you clean everything up before your family wakes up."

"No need. Once she... once she died in my arms, she sort of went up into this black smoke. Besides, I wouldn't want to have you bury a body for a second time," he assures you.

You look up at him, stroking his face, clearing it of blood and tears, and going on your tippy toes to give him a tender kiss. He kissed you back, arms tight around you, and at that moment you thought not of death, not of college, not of your own sins- instead you only thought of his embrace.

And that was right where you wanted to be.

#yoongi #bts yoongi #bts suga #agust d #min yoongi #yoongi smut #bts smut #suga smut #bangtan #bts #yoongi x reader #yoongi fanfiction #yoongi reactions #bts reactions #bts fanfiction

[hawkinsschoolcounselor]

Eleven and her curious lack of development

Eleven. El. Jane Ives. Jane Hopper. El Byers. Call her what you will, but El is seen by many as being the main character of Stranger Things. I personally disagree, and I find her character to be too largely unexplored to be compelling, so far at least. It’s a shame, because there is a lot of potential there. We have this young girl who spent her entire life in a lab until she was around 12 years old. She was raised to be a weapon: dangerous and obedient. Then she found friends.

After Season 1, and a bit into Season 2, I thought they were going to develop her character well. She was clueless about the larger world. She didn’t understand social norms, she acted on impulse, she lashed out at authority, and she responded to social interaction with either hesitation or outright fear. Essentially, she showed signs of Reactive Attachment Disorder as a result of her upbringing. She also showed signs of trauma in regards to Brenner specifically, but we haven’t had an opportunity to explore that yet. Somehow, though, she’s able to understand romance?

El’s first introduction to the idea of romantic relationships was in Season 1. She naturally didn’t understand. She lacked the necessary social development. Everything she knows is based off of what Mike tried to explain, and she had a hard time following. This is all also happening during a traumatic time for both of them. El in particular would have a hard time making sense of all the emotions she’s feeling, and Mike probably wouldn’t do too much better. They build an extremely close bond in only a week’s time. She more or less imprinted on him when he took her in after finding her in the woods. She’d do anything to get his approval.  Let’s be honest here. El likes Mike romantically because he’s basically leading her into thinking she does. He’s not really doing it on purpose, but that’s irrelevant. To El, it’s just another fact or rule, and she doesn’t question it. 

At the end of Season 2, and throughout Season 3, El’s problems largely disappear. Everything is Mike, Mike, Mike. It’s not very unusual. Mike represents safety to her. The problem is, they missed every opportunity to expand her character. Any personal or social growth she had after moving in with Hopper ceased. She actually seems possessive and obsessed with Mike. We get hints of that early in Season 2 where we see her watching Mike, and again when she knocks Max off her skateboard because Mike actually smiled at her. Then she rudely ignores Max when the girl tries to introduce herself. Again, nothing terribly unusual for a kid in her situation, but it’s not something to be seen as healthy and moving past it should be part of her character growth. It may have been intentional. Hopper’s not exactly a therapist, counselor, or teacher, and he’s way out of practice as a parent.

Season 3 shows that El is largely limited in socialization to Mike visiting her. She’s still not allowed out in public, and she’s not shown interacting with any of her other friends. She seems more than happy to leave her friends to go make out with Mike. She hasn’t grown in the 7 months or so since the Snow Ball. This would be ok if her arc this season was about growing past that. It looks like she might. She goes and spends time with Max, for what seems like the first time, and they become friends. Max urges her to “try things on” to find out what she likes, and this should be a jarring line. El literally admits she has no idea how to tell if she likes something. She’s never considered anything beyond what she was told, be it by Brenner, Mike, Hopper, or, now, Max. Taking Max’s advice, she dumps Mike, and she seems pretty happy afterwards.

This is where what could have been good gets ruined. This should have been about her starting to learn that what other people think is good for her isn’t necessarily what is good for her. Instead, what we get is a clumsy and awkward arc that results in her clinging to Mike again. In fact, nothing really seemed to change in their relationship at all. Mike awkwardly tried to get her back. Despite the time they’ve supposedly spent together, they can’t even have a normal conversation. El holds her ground, but then the danger hits and Mike shows his usual bravery as he tries to help her. She becomes dependent on him for safety and comfort again. Then three months later we get the awkward kiss and “I love you” that is so off that it seems like they hadn’t been a couple in the three months since the mall incident. Now she’s saying I love you right before she leaves. She’s clinging right back to Mike because that’s how she feels safe and secure.

In a Season where we could have finally seen El interact with other characters and grow, we get none of that. She has almost nothing with Hopper except the awkward attempts to curb their making out, no interactions with Joyce, none with Will, none with Dustin or Lucas. She’s in the room with them, and there is eye contact, but no real interactions. Was this done intentionally to set up something next season, or are we supposed to accept that this is her character? This socially and emotionally deprived child is somehow mature enough to develop a healthy romantic relationship? I have a lot of trouble believing that the Duffers and their writing team consider this good character development in and of itself.

I risk angering a lot of fans, particularly young teens, but Mike and El are bad for each other, at least as a couple. Their relationship is obsessive and possessive in nature, resulting in the deterioration of their other relationships. It’s a sort of an extreme example of infatuations that are typical of that age. They can be intense, but lack any emotional depth and eventually fail. El’s growth could still be salvaged though. She’s now moving away from Mike. She’s going to have to learn to live without him, and that could provide an avenue for her to realize that she hasn’t loved him so much as needed him. 

My apologies to the fans, but Mileven is toxic. It’s bad for both characters, at least as it stands now. Season 3 actually showed them both better after the breakup. They treated each other as a security blanket when together. It’s “I love you because I need you” rather than “I need you because I love you.” It’s not impossible for them to grow into something healthier, but Season 3 did not suggest such a story arc. We’ll have to wait and see what Season 4 has in store, but I hope it allows El to move towards becoming a fully actualized young lady, rather than being reliant on Mike, especially now that she lacks powers.

#stranger things #stranger things 3 #eleven #el byers

[azenta]

how did you realise youre a 5w6 and not 1??

By actually reading decent posts and "sources" that actually explained and elaborated about 5s further than just being a miserable "knowledge" hoarder for the sake of it and unemotional dumbass. It then made me connect the dots properly. There was also small incoherences that I was noticing but couldn't explain better. Through the new information gained then I had an explanation that took account everything and also simplified everything.

Head vs Gut: Fact is my mind is a non stop mental chatter, and I please myself in it a lot. Gut cores, even if they are still human being and think, tend not to have this problem where they get stuck into loopholes of overthinking, because their issues lies in having instinctive gut reaction the moment their issues get triggered. 1s are known to actually correct/criticize the moment something cross the line of what they fundamentally deem correct/incorrect. Even if 1w9 may contain themselves more due to the w9 making them take pride into detachment, and so closer to 5s in addressing issues they deem wrong, the thing is the w9 also makes them to be even more rooted into their body, and therefore detached from the head and heart issues. Which is not my case. Head types are overthinking machine, they have problems with the head and all the thoughts that inhabit it. 5s will withdraw into it and construct some sort of palace of thoughts and knowledge as a way to stay away from the physical world. And that's my case. If I am not actively thinking, then i am probably sleeping tbh. 1w9s are grounded into their body, and my cognitive stack can't justify being so out of touch with reality on it's own. 

Withdrawal vs compliant: The other problem is, I noticed my first strategy is really not to comply to rules or principles, internal or external, it is to withdraw, and withdraw in my head. In fact, my problem is I have a fucking hard time getting out of it, the moment I am bored or unpleased by what's happening around, I retreat in it, which points out to a withdrawal mechanism as a first response to uneasiness. Compliance on top of competency bs would make me freaking out if I would derogate from any responsibility i have, but i rather tend to withdraw to avoid responsibility because i am scared of not being prepared enough, to not have enough information, knowledge, capacity to own it well. 1s have a set of principles they always comply to or else they'll feel they are being Bad, but I rather withdraw (/read avoid -> phobic) to hoard more knowledge/information, or to analyze more to feel more prepared and so feel more apt to succeed in whatever tasks or principle I had in mind. I never feel like I have enough to do what I should, which is never the case for a 1 core even if INFJ, since a 1 core INFJ would imply they don't hesitate to act on Ni-Fe and feel justified in their Ti, however wrong it would truly be, since they'd feel the urge and need to comply asap. Not that I can't act, but it's astoundingly hard for me when I am faced to novelty since I would usually try to get some information and knowledge on the task instead of doing it first hand (by fear of making a mistake and prove myself how incompetent I am). Also, my many panick attacks by the past were happening because I was faced with something I was unused to and convinced that I was not prepared enough and would fail, or actually failed. A 1 core would have probably accuse anything else than themselves for having failed since they cannot be wrong. It is NOT an option nor a possibility. They don't fear being bad or wrong because "they ARE good/right" (counter phobic), if they are not they'll get into reaction because of disintegration (4 -> cp, and either 8 or 6 influence, both can be cp. Also, all reactive mechanism) and fight twice as hard to prove they are Good/Right.

1 vs 6 influence: Tho, the overlapping with 1 didn't happen for nothing. 6 component are similar to 1s on the surface. They are still compliant, so abide to some set of principles, and tend to be critical. However, the difference is that 6s have lingering doubts cornering their mind. And despite finding some sense of certainty I do still have doubts cornering my mind and contributing to me compulsing into reading, studying or analyse more, to feel I know enough and is competent enough. Also, my knowledge is quite influenced by takes of people I trust their knowledge (through reading them or talking to them). Like I have told before, 6s tend to take references to mold their mind and find security in this, and I lowkey find this aspect in myself, but the difference is I end up trusting more my own conclusions overall. I use references, which switch overtime depending of my own knowledge, but more as a backup to build on my own analysis. Also, Fe account into why I consider other's viewpoints, as it still talks of some truths through which I can Ti and find the logical framework that interrelates everything together.

5 vs 9 influence: I excused the withdrawal, detachment and avoidance of needs on the account of 9, but all the reason leading me to each of these aspect was not actually to reach a peace of mind or an apathy. I wanted to withdraw, but in my head because it feels more secure, I want to detach so I can better analyze and assess what's happening to handle it the most perfectly (competently) possible, and I detach from my needs so no one bothers me and I can stay longer into my mind instead of being forced to interact with the world/people. So well, this is all unrelated to any 9 aspect.

Disintegration and integration: I noticed that when I purposefully tried to go to 7 I was actually doing worse. I became irresponsible, more scattered than ever, and just purposeless. I didn't find any "letting go" in that process and felt I was growing further apart from what I actually wanted to achieve. It corresponds more to disintegrative component of 5 than any form of integration. Also, I noticed this pattern was way more frequent than when meeting pseudo 4w6 disintegration (1w9 disintegration). Actually, when I start to react, it is with actual anger and as a goal to reclaim my power over what's happening to me. Therefore, it's not an unhealthy tantrum to further assert how "right" I am, but rather a cry to live and a way to assert myself, which is in fact rather healthy as it means I am listening to my most inner need and reclaiming to exist. This points to integration to 8. Assertiveness of needs, wanting to have an impact and not shying to manifest my anger to show I actually reached a limit and will not tolerate anyone's else bs. So well, it made more sense, again, to be 5 over 1. It also explained without wing disintegration why I was getting even more anxious and avoidant of anxiety when disintegrating.

Childhood trauma: I really thought my most "traumatic* " experience made me feel like I was fundamentally Bad, but I remember very precisely that the one thing I told myself when it happened is: "I didn't see it coming...". I felt unprepared to what was happening, and from there was born a profound desire to prepare myself to actually be able to detach before anything this emotionally devastating happens again. It is this same year it happened that I also started doing shit load of anxiety. So, from that event was born fear, not anger. I felt powerless and from there did everything to not feel powerless again. The things I thought sure ended up being unpredictable. Also, the w6 grew there, as I lost trust in my father, which I had a very close relationship with. I was part mad at him and felt betrayed, as his choice was leading him further away from me, in my mind. I didn't tolerate this. Even if in the end, everything returned back to normal, I still as of today always prepare mentally for the day it could happen again.

*I put it in parenthesis because it is nothing that bad, but for me as a child, it disrupted everything. I thought everything was fine and perfect, but behind the scenes, it wasn't. 

So, that's what lead me to retype. And I am pissed at actually failing so hard to notice it. But being an INFJ certainly didn't help my case 🙃 Tho, I am actually reluctant to other's views until I ask, because I am actually quite stubborn into believing I know better.,,, in part because admitting i don't know or that I am not sure is a fucking hard blow to my ego. aahhhhhh if that ain't a shitty mix 

#ask #typing #about #e5 #e1 #1w9 #5w6 #en

[couplesinstitutecounseling]

Couples are often uncertain what to expect from the process of couples therapy. They are not sure of what to expect of the therapist or even if the therapist has any expectations of them.

I have found most couples approach therapy with the notion that each person will describe their distress and somehow the therapist will assist them to create a happier, more functional, relationship. They expect to learn some new or better skills. However, most people hope their partner will do most of the learning in problem areas.

After 30 years of clinical experience and specializing in working with thousands of couples, I have arrived at some guidelines that can make our work more effective. First, I do have some expectations of you. I am not neutral. I have evolved principles and concepts that I believe give us the greatest chance for success.

I believe my primary role is to help you improve your responses to each other without violating your core values or deeply held principles. So that you may know some of my key guiding principles, I have created this document to provide clarity and focus to our work.

Your job is to create your own individual objectives for being in therapy. Like a good coach, my job is to help you reach them. I have many, many tools to help you become a more effective partner — they work best when you are clear about how you aspire to be.

Goals and Objectives of Couples Therapy

The major aim of therapy is increasing your knowledge about yourself, your partner and the patterns of interaction between you. Therapy becomes effective as you apply new knowledge to break ineffective patterns and develop better ones.

The key tasks of couples therapy are increasing your clarity about:

The kind of life you want to build together

The kind of partner you aspire to be in order to build the kind of life and relationship you want to create

Your individual blocks to becoming the kind of partner you aspire to be

The skills and knowledge necessary to do the above tasks

Tradeoffs and Tough Choices

To create sustained improvement in your relationship you need:

A vision of the life you want to build together

To have a life separate from your partner because you are not joined at the hip

The appropriate attitudes and skills to work as a team

The motivation to persist

Time to review progress

To create the relationship you really desire, there will be some difficult tradeoffs and tough choices for each person.

The first tradeoff will be time. It simply takes time to create a relationship that flourishes: time to be together, time to be with family, time to play, coordinate, nurture, relax, hang out and plan. This time will encroach on some other valuable areas — your personal or professional time.

The second compromise is comfort. That means emotional comfort, like going out on a limb to try novel ways of thinking or doing things, listening and being curious instead of butting in, speaking up instead of becoming resentfully compliant or withdrawing. At the beginning, there will be emotional risk taking action, but you will never explore different worlds if you always keep sight of the shoreline. In addition, few people are emotionally comfortable being confronted with how they don’t live their values or being confronted with the consequences of their actions.

The other comfort that will be challenged is energy comfort. It simply takes effort to sustain improvement over time: staying conscious of making a difference over time, remembering to be more respectful, more giving, more appreciative etc. It takes effort to remember and act.

The other effort is even more difficult for some people: that is improving their reaction to problems. For example, if one person is hypersensitive to criticism, and his/her partner is hypersensitive to feeling ignored, it will take effort to improve their sensitivity instead of hoping the partner will stop ignoring or criticizing.

In all these areas, there is generally a conflict between short-term gratification and the long-term goal of creating a satisfying relationship. The blunt reality is that, in an interdependent relationship, effort is required on the part of each person to make a sustained improvement. It is like pairs figure skating — one person cannot do most of the work and still create an exceptional team.

How to Maximize the Value from your Couples Therapy Sessions

A common yet unproductive pattern in couple’s therapy is making the focus be whatever problem happens to be on someone’s mind at the moment. This is a reactive (and mostly ineffective) approach to working things through.

The second unproductive pattern is showing up and saying, “I don’t know what to talk about, do you?” While this blank slate approach may open some interesting doors, it is a hit or miss process.

The third common unproductive pattern is discussing whatever fight you are now in or whatever fight you had since the last meeting. Discussing these fights/arguments without a larger context of what you wish to learn from the experience is often an exercise in spinning your wheels.

Over time, repeating these patterns will lead to the plaintive question, “Are we getting anywhere?”

A more powerful approach to your couple’s therapy sessions is for each person to do the following before each session:

Reflect on your objectives for being in therapy.

Think about your next step that supports or relates to your larger objectives for the kind of relationship you wish to create, or the partner you aspire to become.

This reflection takes some effort. Yet few people would call an important meeting and then say, “Well, I don’t have anything to bring up, does anyone else have anything on their agenda?” Your preparation will pay high dividends.

Important Concepts for Couples Therapy and Relationships

The following ideas can help identify areas of focus in our work and/or stimulate discussion between you and your partner between meetings. If you periodically review this list, you will discover that your reflections and associations will change over time. So please revisit this list often, it will help you keep focus during our work.

Attitude is Key

When it comes to improving your relationship, your attitude toward change is more important than what action to take.

Identifying what to do and how to do it is often easy to identify. The bigger challenge is why you don’t do it.

How to think differently about a problem is often more effective than just trying to figure out what action to take.

Your partner is quite limited in his/her ability to respond to you. You are quite limited in your ability to respond to your partner. Accepting that is a huge step into maturity.

The definite possibility exists that you have some flawed assumptions about your partner’s motives. And that he/she has some flawed assumptions about yours. The problem is, most of the time we don’t want to believe those assumptions are flawed.

Focus on Changing Yourself Rather than Your Partner

Couples therapy works best if you have more goals for yourself than for your partner. I am at my best when I help you reach objectives you set for yourself.

Problems occur when reality departs sharply from our expectations, hopes, desires and concerns. It’s human nature to try and change one’s partner instead of adjusting our expectations. This aspect of human nature is what keeps therapists in business.

The hardest part of couples therapy is accepting you will need to improve your response to a problem (how you think about it, feel about it, or what to do about it). Very few people want to focus on improving their response. It’s more common to build a strong case for why the other should do the improving.

You can’t change your partner. Your partner can’t change you. You can influence each other, but that doesn’t mean you can change each other. Becoming a more effective partner is the most efficient way to change a relationship.

It’s easy to be considerate and loving to your partner when the vistas are magnificent, the sun is shining and breezes are gentle. But when it gets bone chilling cold, you’re hungry and tired, and your partner is whining and sniveling about how you got them into this mess, that’s when you get tested. Your leadership and your character get tested. You can join the finger pointing or become how you aspire to become.

Nothing is impossible for the person who doesn’t have to do it.

Fear lets you know you’re not prepared. If you view fear in that mode, it becomes a signal to prepare the best you can.

You can learn a lot about yourself by understanding what annoys you and how you handle it.

The more you believe your partner should be different, the less initiative you will take to change the patterns between you.

Zen Aspects of Couples Therapy (Some Contradictions)

All major goals have built in contradictions, for example, speak up or keep the peace.

All significant growth comes from disagreements, dissatisfaction with the current status, or a striving to make things better. Paradoxically, accepting that conflict produces growth and learning to manage inevitable disagreements is the key to more harmonious relationships.

It’s not what you say. It’s what they hear.

Solutions, no matter how perfect, set the stage for new problems.

Tough Questions

Asking good questions–of yourself and your partner–helps you uncover causes beneath causes.

In a strong disagreement, do you really believe your partner is entitled to their opinion?

Under duress, do you have the courage and tenacity to seek your partner’s reality and the courage to express your reality when the stakes are high?

Why is it important to let your partner know what you think, feel and are concerned about? (Because they really can’t appreciate what they don’t understand.)

What is the price your partner will have to pay to improve their response to you? How much do you care about the price they will have to pay? (Everything has a price and we always pay it.)

Can you legitimately expect your partner to treat you better than you treat him/her?

If you want your partner to change, do you think about what you can do to make it easier?

When a problem shows up, it’s natural to think “What should I do about it?” A much more productive question is. “How do I aspire to be in this situation?”

The Importance of Communication

The three most important qualities for effective communication are respect, openness and persistence.

Good communication is much more difficult than most people want to believe. Effective negotiation is even harder.

A couple’s vision emerges from a process of reflection and inquiry. It requires both people to speak from the heart about what really matters to each.

We are all responsible for how we express ourselves, no matter how others treat us.

Communication is the number one presenting problem in couples counseling. Effective communication means you need to pay attention to:

Managing unruly emotions, such as anger that is too intense

How you are communicating — whining, blaming, vague, etc.

What you want from your partner during the discussion

What the problem symbolizes to you

The outcome you want from the discussion

Your partner’s major concerns

How you can help your partner become more responsive to you

The beliefs and attitudes you have about the problem.

No wonder good communication is so hard.

Some Final Thoughts.

You can’t create a flourishing relationship by only fixing what’s wrong. But it’s a start.

Grace under pressure does not spring full-grown even with the best of intentions — practice, practice and more practice. Practice the right things and you will get there.

Love is destroyed when self-interest dominates.

If you don’t know what you feel in important areas of your relationship, it is like playing high stakes poker when you see only half your cards. You will make a lot of dumb plays.

The possibility exists that we choose partners we need but don’t necessarily want.

To get to the bottom of a problem often means you first accept how complex it is.

Trust is the foundational building block of a flourishing relationship. You create trust by doing what you say you will do.

It’s impossible to be in a highly inter-dependent relationship without ever being judgmental or being judged.

If you strive to always feel emotionally safe in your relationship and get it, you will pay the price by becoming dull.

If neither of you ever rocks boat, you will end up with a dull relationship

Knowledge is not power. Only knowledge that is applied is power.

Most of the ineffective things we do in relationships fall into just a few categories:

Blame or attempt to dominate

Disengage/withdraw

Resentful compliance

Whine

Denial or confusion.

These are the normal emotional reactions to feeling a threat or high stress. Improving your relationship means better management of these reactions.

Everything you do works for some part of you, even if other parts of you don’t like it.

Three motivations will govern any sustained effort you make. You will seek to: 1. Avoid pain or discomfort 2. Create more benefits 3. Be a better person. It’s also true for your partner.

If you are asking your partner to change something, sometimes it’s a good idea to ask if the change is consistent with how they aspire to be in that situation.

Businesses and marriages fail for the same three reasons. A failure to:

Learn from the past

Adapt to changing conditions

Predict probable future problems and take action.

Effective change requires insight plus action. Insight without action is passivity. Action without insight is impulsive. Insight plus action leads to clarity and power.

If you want to create a win-win solution, you cannot hold a position that has caused your partner to lose in the past.

“To be a champ you have to believe in yourself when nobody else will.” Sugar Ray Robinson -Middleweight boxing champion, considered by many to be the best fighter in history, pound-for-pound.

Note: please review this document periodically as there is simply too much to absorb in one reading of it. We all will benefit from your efforts.

The following three questions help clarify and sharpen our focus.

1. What kind of relationship do you want to be in and create if you stay together? What kind of relationship makes you glad to see other at the end of the day?

Interestingly, most couples who created their own wedding vows describe a marriage that could serve as the North Star for the kind of relationship they want to co-create.

If you wrote your own vows, how well do you remember them?

Identifying the kind of relationship you desire to be in is the target, the bigger picture of why we are meeting. Otherwise, we’re just going to jump in and try to solve problems without any idea how these problems fit into a bigger picture of where you’re headed.

You don’t start packing for a trip unless you have an idea where you’re going or how long you going to be there.

2. Why is this kind of relationship important to you?

It takes motivation to do the heavy lifting that’s going to grow your relationship.

It’s often said, and I believe it, “When we lose our why, we lose our way.”

It’s a lot more than just coming in here and complaining about what your partner does and then hope for a miracle. It’s human nature to want progress without effort or emotional risk. However, desire without effort creates lifeless marriages.

3. What’s required of you, not your partner, to create this kind of marriage?

The sooner you start identifying what’s required of you, not what’s required of your partner, you are on the way to the fast track of creating change.

I also know everybody has self-protection and coping mechanisms that inhibit individual growth.

Your barriers can be those that you’ve created since you got together or resulted from negative early life experiences.

Common barriers to growth are a quick temper, being critical, disengaging, not being dependable, being furious instead of curious, etc.

Just reading all this information and reflecting on how you aspire to be a better partner is a good beginning!

If you find you need help, reach out to us for a free consultation. We can help!

#couples therapy