#also y'all men will never understand that when we put you all in the same boat | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sunkissed-zegras · 9 months

Text

✮ 𝐛𝐮𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐬, jamie drysdale

now you're liftin' me up, 'stead of holdin' me down stealin' my heart, 'stead of stealin' my crown untangled all the strings 'round my wings that were tied i didn't know him and i didn't know me cloud nine was always out of reach now i remember what it feels like to fly you give me butterflies

♡ ─ word count | 1.9k

♡ ─ summary | no one has ever made you feel the way jamie did. every day, jamie convinces you more and more that he loves you in different ways.

♡ ─ warnings | unedited, a little bit of angst to fluff (like the tiniest bit, it all gets resolved), tooth rotting sweet fluff, a little mention of exes, jealousy

♡ ─ taglist | fill out my form if you're interested!

♡ ─ ev's notes | i love jamie more than anything else in the world, he makes me SO FUCKING HAPPY. anyways, i kind of went off the song a little bit but i just needed a title LMAO, i love the song though. check it out if y'all haven't heard it. i'm such a whore for fluff, this was also very self indulgent.

You'd never been in love before Jamie.

That was the recent realization you'd have. Ever since you'd been with Jamie, you'd realized that no other ex could ever compare to Jamie. Or the way he treated you ─ it was special, and that was how you knew you loved him.

He treated you with respect and kindness, something you had never experienced before. All your other relationships were anything but that ─ stupid, immature and childish men were the ones you were used to.

It had been a recent realization, though. You'd only been with Jamie for about 8 months ─ neither of you had ever said the special three words. But that doesn't mean you guys didn't feel it ─ he showed it through his actions.

Jamie was very observant person, he was good at picking up certain cues which made him insanely empathetic ─ something you had never experienced before. He not only showed empathy but also a remarkable level of understanding, a realization that dawned on you during your first "disagreement" with him.

──

You sat next to Jamie as you both watched the movie, feeling the familiar burning of jealousy swell in your stomach as you kept repeating the same scene in your head over and over again. Jamie giving one of his girl-friends a very tight and up-close hug, putting his arms around her like he did with you. You weren't even paying attention to the movie at that point, too preoccupied with the feeling that was currently sitting in your stomach like a bag of rocks.

Now you knew that Jamie wouldn't ever cheat or make you uncomfortable ─ he did it subconsciously which somehow made it worse because you couldn't logically get jealous over something that wasn't intentional.

You made an effort to conceal your jealousy by diverting your attention to the movie playing, but you were lost in your own thoughts.

When the movie paused, you were finally drawn out of your thoughts as you turned to face Jamie.

He sighed and put the remote down, turning to face you completely. "What's wrong?"

You forced out a smile, "Nothing, just tried. Let's just finish the movie."

Jamie kept staring into your eyes, furrowing his eyebrows. "You're not tired, what's wrong? Really?"

You felt your stomach twist in irritation. How didn't he know? Your face turned to an annoyed expression like a switch. "I said nothing Jamie, so just drop it."

Your angry words lingered in the now, tense, atmosphere as you both stared into each other's eyes. Jamie slightly flinched at your unusual outburst.

Nevertheless, he continued. Jamie was nothing if not persistent, you'd noticed. "Y/N, just tell me what's wrong so we can fix this ─ I hate this."

The slight hurt in his voice made everything switch again. The anger turned into guilt just as quickly and you realized that you were being the toxic one now. Jamie wasn't your ex, Jamie was himself and that was why this was working.

You hated this feeling as you took a deep breathe, diverting your gaze back to the screen so that you wouldn't feel uncomfortable under his watch. "I'm not sure..."

Jamie finally exhaled, putting his hand on top of yours. "There's obviously something wrong." He said softly, "Tell me so I can fix it, baby."

The sweet pet-name rolled off his tongue so softly, it made your heart swell and you were hit with a sense of comfort from his tender touch.

You exhaled deeply before returning your gaze back to him. "You hugged Emma too close the other night, I... I didn't like it. But I don't want you to feel suffocated or anything, if this is just me overthinking just tell me so I can just shut up about it─"

"Y/N, you're not suffocating me." He chuckled out in disbelief of your words. He held your hand tighter and sighed before nodding. "If you're uncomfortable with me hugging other girls, I don't want to make you feel bad so I can stop, baby. I'm sorry, I was just doing it out of habit."

You felt guilty almost instantly. "No, no. It's fine, it's not your fault, honestly. It was just because it was so close."

Jamie gave you a small smile. "Baby, I don't wanna touch anyone expect you, I don't care. Even if it makes you feel the tiniest bit upset, I won't do it. Trust me, it's not like it's an inconvenience."

The validation was a new feeling you'd never felt in any other relationship. It felt like a breath of fresh air ─ it was the best feeling ever. But you still felt a tiny bit guilty, were you being controlling?

It was like Jamie was reading your mind. Before you could reply, he continued. "You aren't being controlling, baby ─ you just communicated what you were feeling and I'm just agreeing with you. It's my own decision. You're right, if you hugged another boy like the way I did with Emma, I would've mad too."

The new feeling grew in your stomach and you felt so happy. A smile was plastered on your face as you squeezed his hand. You let out a deep exhale. "Thank you, for understanding."

"You're welcome, baby. But don't thank me for being a decent boyfriend, it's the least I could do." Jamie smiled as he pulled you closer to his chest. "How could I ever want any other person's touch when I have yours?"

You laughed at the cheesy statement, Jamie joining in a few seconds after. "Yeah, me too Jamie."

──

Jamie always showed his love in different ways. He was not a fan of too much PDA ─ he's a believer of privacy. He hates when other people are somehow involved in your relationship, he kept everything between you two because he knew it wouldn't end well if other people put their opinions on your relationship.

Jamie showed his love by doing the small stuff. Jamie was very observant and he knows everything you liked, and he would go out of his way to make sure to make you feel seen. For example, he knows that you weren't good on caffeine so he made sure to buy decaf coffee and herbal tea.

During the off-season, Jamie would still wake up before you and he would make your drinks. He knew you liked iced tea so he would make sure to put the drink in the fridge so you wouldn't have to wait. That was just one of the many things that Jamie does for you to show he cares.

──

You awoke softly, stretching in the warm bed before the dread sat in. You looked next to you ─ Jamie was already gone. You'd thought that his flight would be later in the day but you remembered it was 5 am.

You sighed softly and shook away the disappointment. You missed him ─ he had just flew back in a few days ago and even then, you'd only spent the nights together because he was busy. You understood but you couldn't help but feel a little dejected.

You got up to the bathroom and did your morning routine before walking into the empty living room before the kitchen. You opened the refrigerator door and saw your daily herbal tea which made you crack a small smile. You also saw a small sticky-note on the cup.

You picked it up and read it with a grin.

Sorry I had to leave early this morning. Made you some lemongrass and lavender tea, your favorite. Enjoy, baby.

Love, J P.S check the coffee table

Your heart swelled at the sweet words. You were slightly confused at the last statement and you put down your tea on the island before walking to the coffee table.

In the middle, sat a pink letter with a sticky note on top that says "This one". You giggled to yourself, you knew you could get confused. You picked it up and ripped it open.

There were two things ─ a note and a few tickets. You were confused as you read the note first.

Pack your bags and plan your outfits, we are going to see Taylor Swift in a week. I'll see you then.

Love, J

──

Neither of you had ever said the three of the most special words. The declaration of love had never been said by neither of you. You never needed to hear it ─ you already knew it.

He did things for you and so did you, you never needed to hear it to know it's true. Actions were stronger than words to both of you.

──

You two both stood in the kitchen, listening to some music as you made dinner. This was the first weekend Jamie had finally been free and you both decided a date night would be good for you two. You'd be lying if you said that his schedule didn't put a strain in your relationship but you both promised that a date night whenever he was free would help.

And it worked ─ you both listened to favorite artists as you made the pasta and he made the salad, updating each other on each other's lives. You spoke so freely, informing him on everything that was going in your head and so did he, telling you about all the drama that was going on in his friend-group and team.

"─And then we all just stood there, trying to figure out what to say to the poor girl." He laughed as he cut out the vegetables for your salad. "Then she left and keyed his new Range Rover."

The last part made you dial back, looking back in disbelief. "What? All because she thought they were dating?"

He laughed even louder, you joining a few seconds after. "Yeah! He was so mad he didn't come to practice for the next two days."

"Crazy. But I don't blame her, he shouldn't have led her on." You added as you poured the sauce over the pasta, looking over to Jamie.

"Agreed, but his Range Rover? I mean, that must've been a fortune to fix."

"Shouldn't have led her on, then." You said as Jamie let out another small laugh as he poured the salad into the bowl, putting on the dining table.

You poured the pasta in the plates and put them on the table, all while Jamie poured some juice into cups and into them on the table. The two of you were always in sync ─ you never had to worry about him not getting his tasks done.

You both sat in the table, exhausted. "I'm so hungry." Jamie mumbled before taking a bite of the pasta.

"Yeah, me too."

His eyes sparkled as he devoured the meal, emitting an appreciative moan. "Oh my gosh, I missed this. This is so good. My god, I love you," he mumbled while continuing to eat, seemingly unaware of his inadvertent declaration of love.

A sudden hush fell between you, and he nervously gulped down his food, his gaze fixed on you. You both looked at one another, quietly. He cleared his throat and nervously swallowed another bite, his gaze fixed on you.

At that moment, a radiant smile adorned your face, casting a warm and playful glow. You couldn't resist a teasing inquiry, letting the question dance in your eyes as you leaned forward slightly. "You love me or my food?"

The question hung in the air, carrying with it a sense of lightheartedness. The intensity was suddenly all dropped as he grinned back. "Is that okay if I say both?"

"Yeah, of course baby." You replied, continuing eating slowly as the music played in the background. "Hey, Jamie?"

He gave you a mumble in response, too busy eating the pasta you made.

"I love you too."

-> make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated! <-

thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡

412 notes · View notes

askganon · 6 months

Note

I'm really tired. I just transferred to a new university to study psychology and it has been the actual worst experience in every aspect. The two biggest issues are the fact that I am autistic and thusly have issues making friends, and that I have this god-awful professor in my counseling class.

This professor is OFF his rocker. He actively talks about the secret society he is in, trying to teach us preposterous things that have no place in that class or even the school at all. I could write a novel about every problematic thing he has said, but my most major issue with him is how he views and treats women, and continuously brings sexual topics up when they have no relevance to the course material.

He has disrespected his wife over the phone in the middle of class and then tried to justify his behavior using his gender, spoken extensively about what features men don't like on women such as makeup or plastic surgery. He says "natural" women are "healthy" (well-endowed) in either the chest or behind but not both, and are uneven in the chest. He specifically targeted my classmate, who was the only one wearing false eyelashes, to say that men don't like that either.

Another time he told us that women run the world because men are obsessed with us, that we are not oppressed at all, yet he turns around and tells us how women in the corporate world go commando under their skirts and sleep around to work up the corporate ladder. He says this in a way that puts women to shame for this as well.

This week, though, was completely different. His departure from the course material started with the extremely invasive question, "what do you remember about your transition to adolescence?" Again targeting that very same classmate. I blink and he is now telling us that the male experience during puberty is far worse than what women experience, basically saying that—excuse my bluntness—getting a boner in class is much worse than anything women go through, even turning to our singular male classmate for backup on this.

He also tries to tell us that its so so bad for boys because the girls actively try to touch them or make them "psychologically disturbed," as he worded so decoratively. What adolescent girl wants anything to do with that when she's going through her own problems? Since when were young girls going out of their way to trouble boys like this? I was actively trying to deter boys during this time.

I and the other two women in my class were disputing all of this, until our professor finally said, "I will just let that go over y'all heads cause you will never understand the male experience," to which I, shaking with rage, replied, "—and vice versa."

My mental health has been suffering severely, and much worse since this happened Monday. I had never felt such pure, primordial rage towards someone before. This man makes me feel not only objectified but also demonized. Last night was my breaking point, working on one of his assignments. I experienced the most intense mental breakdown of my life so far, and afterwards spent all but two hours of the night trying to cram the project that was due today.

I guess my point is that I would report him, but my school makes it nigh impossible to do so. I'm perpetually exhausted and I do not know if I can make it through the last two weeks of class. I want so badly to be petty and spiteful to his face, but for the most part I've controlled it.

I don't really know what I'm looking for by doing this. I guess I just want to know what you think? Apologies for the length of my message.

Such is the mentality I encountered often in my youth by Hylian men, and women, toward my sisters. They would lust after my sisters based on their attire and physique, while also attempting to demonize them and ostracize them for the exact same reasons.

In short, men are cowards who carry the darkest urges shamelessly, but are too prideful to admit the problem within themselves. Instead, the vilify women for their own indiscretions.

They will openly mock my Gerudo for their appearance, while desiring nothing more than to own their flesh in the most disturbing of ways.

This professor seems like a prime example of the Hylian males I encountered. But if this is the case, then so too is his weakness.

He has likely been thwarted in his past in his attempts to procure a mate to his liking, and due to his pride, he believes it is all of womanhood to blame, and not himself.

This one he singles out is likely similar to those he desired but could never obtain in his youth. As such, he blames all others for his own shortcomings.

Likely too with his mate. I would assume her physique does not fit the desires he now feels entitled to, and as such he makes her the target of his criticism.

But through all of this, he reveals a second weakness.

Fear.

He fears that which he cannot control, and women as a whole seem out of his grasp. Every slight, every jab, and every assault from his lips is but proof that he is afraid of what women are capable.

In the midst of a Gerudo warrior, this professor of yours would crumble like kindling to a flame.

Take solace in the knowledge that you are superior to this worm, for you are what he can never have.

#Ganondorf #Legend of Zelda

94 notes · View notes

buckybarnesss · 1 year

Note

Sending this on anon -

I think there is a latent amount of misogyny in the star wars fandom that people aren't ready to face lol.

Like there was so much hate for RebelCaptain and Bix x Cassian (MechanicThief? Bixian?) After andor, and we were called homophobic for 'not wanting to ship' the mlm ships, and I'm like???!! First of all multiplies exist, and second of all, complex, dramatic, well written ships also should exist!

And I'm now seeing the same pattern where it's encouraged to ship Din with the men, but not with the women

I think that a lot of fans really need to look within their consumption and see if they're really looking for representation, or for Ken dolls they can experiment with.

DinBo is so fascinating and I really can't wait to see how they develop

oh y'all want me to get spicy. i'm gonna put his under a read more.

i don't even think it's latent. the female characters receive an excessive amount of hatred or are pitted against each other. i've been in fandom spaces a long, long, long time so i know it's sadly nothing new but people have a hard time accepting that not all the misogyny comes from men.

there is no quarter for woman characters like jyn erso and bo-katan. they will never please. especially when they may have possible romantic relationships with the male leads.

i have thoughts on the shipping atmosphere for the mandalorian and it's not positive.

i am very much a ship and let ship person. i prefer to stay in my lane and enjoy what i enjoy. no harm no foul.

but i do find it -- shall we say interesting -- that bo-katan and din have a multiple episode arc where they develop a deeper understanding of each other overcoming their differences from when they first met but is met with the attitude of ew no cooties. it is fine to prefer a more sibling dynamic between the two but some have been really nasty about others shipping it romantically.

i didn't even really ship it at first but it's grown on me over the course of the season. they compliment each other and have a lot of protentional to explore.

it's one thing to not like a ship but i've seen a lot of language that i consider problematic and outright anti behavior of labeling something you don't like with dog whistles of incest, grooming, toxic and disgusting when it's in fact none of those things at all. just say you don't ship it and keep stepping.

like, the most popular din ship over the past two years has been dinluke which is a perfectly acceptable ship but in canon they've exchanged like a handful of words in one scene. it's fanon.

the armorer and bo-katan has become a popular ship which is again built on a few interactions.

but somehow din and bo are terrible, no good and gross.

we don't even have canon sexualities for these characters and headcanons are not canon. hell, i personally see din on the ace spectrum and bo makes sense to me as bi but that's my headcanon.

this is also not dean winchester being based of a bisexual character and fifteen years of evidence of subtext or stiles stilinski's bisexual baiting by jeff davis on teen wolf.

i get the desire for more lgbta+ representation in star wars but a heterosexual relationship existing is not your enemy and if you think it is than you are part of the problem.

#my blog #the mandalorian #dinbo #getting spicy today #shipping discourse

64 notes · View notes

himbo-in-limbo · 8 months

Text

Kure Rain x s/o Rant! (New season spoilers)

[tw gore n bloody stuff mentioned]

In hype of the new season (that I literally just finished binge watching a couple days ago)

It got me thinking of my mans

That crazy bastard that I love sm Kure Raian

(I'm so fuckin mad about what was supposed to be his big fight when the coup happened)

Anyways anytime I read a fic of Raian x reader it's always the same-ish thing of the reader not fully loving the sheer brutality that Raian is

I can't be the only one that gets excited seeing him covered in blood! Like dawg if I saw him all nice n bloody like that with a sexy smile comin at me all nonchalant

Like "Hey baby~ did you like the bloodbath?" I'm jumping on him and making out right then n there..

I wanna be covered in the same blood ya feel me? (That's TMI probably..)

It's probably bc I'm a fan of gore or something but like you gotta understand that killing is not only his job ITS HIS PASSION

And him being an asshole is also part of it, sure you can try n convince him to not FULLY kill someone but honestly I'd say you have a 1% chance of succeeding...

It'd have to be a solid good reason tho

Not just cuz your his partner...

Even so! Odds are the person he's messing with is a stranger to you 😭 (if your not into him killing random ppl then maybe not be in a relationship with him)

He has few morals...which align with his assassin fams code but he's just a morally grey character

That's what's so hot about him honestly

You can't ever really predict who he'll spare and for what reason...

But you get to see his fine ass just deal with grown ass men like nothing is a treat all in it's own

Hell we don't even know how he'd act in a relationship bc he hardly ever shows interest in anyone like that! He likes scarring people to hell tho

So I'd wager if you "end up with him" expect it to be a big ol situationship...

It's best to not put labels on it bc if you pressure him with that he looks like the type to leave...

And even if you are sick of it! Just tell him up front that he can either make it official or you'll leave!

That might make him realize that he has something genuine with you OR y'all just break it off and you can find yourself a better partner

Bc lets face it 😭 he's....not the best

His familys great tho I bet they'd be all over you

Especially if you're cool with reproducing an heir 💀

If not hey their just shocked he was able to find ANYONE that would "date" him

Like really? Him? Okay...

Raian doesn't strike me as the type to care much if you leave him, tho if you did have a profound impact on him

I think he'd stalk you for a bit...you'd never know he's there btw

He'd totally stalk the hell outta your new partner tho...and if their no good he'll kill em with much thought..

He dose care in his own way :D it's just bat shit crazy

I feel like If Raian did have a canonical partner they'd have to be a bit cooky themselves ya know? 😭

N yeah he might not say much but he dose better expressing his feelings through acts of service or just in general sleeping with you

Bc again we haven't seen him interact with anyone like that or show interest at all!

So odds are him sleeping with people is a rare thing! (Demisexual ass...)

But yeah back to him fighting n stuff I feel like he'd be super happy if his partner was also excited about seeing a real blood bath of a fight

Like yeah probably not the best influence on him like that but asdhsjsnskk

Honestly I wouldn't be able to help it

He's like when ppl are in love with the horror icons

You love ppl like ghost face n Jason! There def not gonna stop doing what they do! N their hella crazy!

That's the vibes Raian gives me...

The only thing that's different is, I feel like the more years you spend with him he WILL calm down by like 10% and he may not go off on ppl randomly like when he was younger but he'd still do it on occasion...

#i ran outta fule to finish this sounding more coherent...#but yea i just want a fic where the reader loves raian being raian #just two crazy blood lust lovers #they never outright encourage it but raian knows his partner loves seeing him dominate weaklings...#kure raian #limbo rants #limbo writes #kengan ashura #tw gore #tw blood mentioned

36 notes · View notes

mediple-culture-is · 4 days

Note

questioning mediple culture is not really being sure where you stand in the grand scheme of things, because your headmates are all different people (but many of them are fictives of the same character so there's some funkiness) (and while they are different from each other, the difference between two of them is negligible compared to the differences between one of them and another headmate who isn't a fictive of that character), but not being able to understand the apparently extreme separation that other multiple systems have.

like. the most difference in opinion we have is whether or not we like peppermint. or chocolate. or cheese. and (with chocolate, for example) everyone who likes chocolate agrees that dark chocolate is the best and white chocolate is the worst. and everyone who likes cheese agrees that swiss cheese is terrible. we've never understood the thought of having different opinions on major discourses, let alone vastly different opinions like we've seen. any headmates who come in with different opinions (usually fictives who held different opinions from us in source) end up changing their minds within a day or two at most. while a lot of us have different pronouns technically, everyone is okay with the same sets of pronouns being used. very, very few headmates have genders that significantly differ from the "singletsona", and when the "singletsona's" gender changes, so does the gender of most other headmates, at least slightly. (eg., we used to think of ourselves as a trans man and the vast majority of us were, if not wholly men, extremely masc, and now we see ourselves as a butchgendered lesbian and the vast majority of headmates, with few exceptions, have had their genders--subtly or non-subtly--shifted closer to the collective butch identity)

idk we're just now realizing that maybe the reason we couldn't relate to 99% of the multiple systems we met was because we. weren't actually wholly multiple.

Gonna actually put something for this. We relate almost 100% to this. The only difference being we don't have any doubles in our system. But other than that, yeah we absolutely feel this.

We also don't always understand when other systems have big arguments. Like yes, we sometimes have quippy squabbles with each other, but that's it. We generally get a long and agree with eachother. We're one big happy cooperating family.

And YES the gender/pronouns situation. We have *1* woman. The rest of us are genderqueer messes (well, we have some cis dudes too, but that's closer to the general gender vibe). But that woman is also a bit genderfucky, so ya'know.

But yes, very much feel y'all. -Seff

#mediple culture is #actually mediple #mediple #mediple system #plurality #actually plural #actuallyplural #plural system

8 notes · View notes

youremyheaven · 24 days

Note

AHEM. I WILL BEGIN MY INFODUMP ON THE FREAKINESS OF SOLAR MEN NOW. this is just a pt. 1 because idk how y'all will take this so um i'll just to do the most tame stuff rn.

to preface i'm a lunar woman down & a masochistic sub. that's relevant bc all of my exes are solar doms who happen to also just be doms in the bedroom TT. and i need y'all to remember that when you read this bc all of this is consensual & i dont want to paint it as otherwise because like i said i'm not here to slander them!

anyways so to start these men get off so much to psychological & physical domming of others. literally anything that falls into this category of domming they're into - roughing you up, degradation, wildly imbalanced power play etc.

the weirdest part abt it is that they can sense submission in others from the get-go. despite all my solar exes being doms surprisingly i've never met them off any bdsm dating sites/apps. i met them all in an organic very meet-cute kind of way and yet when we get into the relationship eventually and reflect on our early days like talking abt things like our 1st impressions they will alw admit they could sense that i was submissive from the jump. so that's another thing they can smell that on you immediately.

so i'm going to talk about my latest ex specifically bc i think he exemplifies what i'm most trying to get at here. he's a uphal moon, krittika asc, and pbp sun. and like all my other exes he was a dom too but he took it to lengths i had yet to seen till him.

1st of all solar men's sex drive is insane. mind you no joke i'm clinically a hypersexual myself but it's a lot trying to keep up with them omg. they constantly want it and will shamelessly go for it. it seems almost unconscious to them even (e.x. feeling you up mindlessly)? so with my last ex we were fucking like rabbits so much that it got to the point where i exclusively wore dresses and skirts around him because it was just easier. and we eventually agreed to have me forgo wearing anything underneath if we were hanging at his or my place tg because it was kind of like ... what's the point? we're just gonna end up rolling around with each other at some point today💀

that's why when you said that you love sex i felt so seen because im the same way. it quite literally feels like turning my brain off and i get so dopey happy and calm afterwards like it'll put me straight to sleep. i get rly whiny and sad if i go even a day without soooo stay strong sister you will get through this

anyways a lot of semi-public sex too with solars. like in the car before events, in bathrooms if we can sneak away from said events etc. and they get turned on really easily like it's just not difficult to get them in the mood if they're not already in the mood. solar men also rly like the whole daddy/dad thing. you can literally see their whole face perk up when you acknowledge them in that regard. i cant speak on ddlg specifically because that's not for me personally but in my experience with my exes they've explained the whole daddy/dad kink as just feeding into their powerplay kink so that's how i've come to understand it for them.

the last thing i'll touch on for now (that is if i ever decide to be brave enough to continue sharing with y'all ummmm) is impact play! they seem to like this kind of thing. but not in the way i've seen it manifest for other naks like not in the same way it's depicted in 50 shades of grey for e.x. - in fact i think that guy is a mercurial so def different. solar men are a lot more fun with it. like when they spank you, gag you, slap you etc. it's not rly because they're trying to discipline you or quote on quote teach you a lesson or punish you. it's just bc it's fun to them to see you in that position and it thus feeds into their ego (which is i think at the root of why they like the kind of sex they like. it's an ego thing ultimately) - and personally i'm the type i'm in a giggling fit when i'm getting roughed up like that so it's truly just two ppl having fun and getting off in a weird grossish way one another.

thank you for sharing this 😳I miss sex more than ever and now I'm also intrigued by the idea of banging a Solar man 😳😤

10 notes · View notes

wild-wombytch · 4 months

Text

Mix of reading review and personal shits and existential crisis about lesbianism : (also TW for rape, I'm putting the most TMI paragraphs in purple so you can skip them)

I finished reading a French book with pictures and portraits of lesbians. While I liked it (there are especially fascinating portraits of immigrant lesbians and elderly lesbians), I have mixed feelings about it.

On the bright side, no TIM apparently, even a TIF dating only lesbians and not pretending to be male who was quite wholesome to read about. We stan endangered species.

And the less bright side...A lot of the women here seem to be bisexuals calling themselves lesbians and saying they "became" lesbians or they made a choice or were "happy" with their male exes. A lot of uses of "queer" (although all these women undeniably are SSA, have sex with and date women). The average experience seems to be women who were with their moid for 8y or so, had kids with them, and then had experiences with women or met their current long-term female partner and have more babies with them.

It's a bit disappointing. Like, I can understand older women who married long term with men maybe being lesbians. I can understand women trying to be with men (like I did) because they had no real representation of lesbian relationships (especially in rural/very religious areas) and never questioned their lack of attraction to men because they thought everyone was meh about them and hetero relationships were seen as the "default" or because they were afraid of their attraction to women.

But I'm sorry, women who are happy with men can't be lesbian by definition. And women who stay for YEARS with their moids... like c'mon. (Kinda TMI following) I spent two weeks and a half with "mine" because I was stuck in a foreign country and couldn't go home after two days there and I already felt sick and wanted to kms and had genuine mental breakdowns curling on the floor crying and only calming down by mentally organising my luggage and making plans to maybe hitchhike and panhandle my way to the airport while taking opioids until I was numb enough to be gaslighted into giving him another chance. And another. And another...and so on.

Technically, I was never fully penetrated because I was so repelled that I became a venus flytrap and I'm thinking that the bleeding I had was more about having tears down there than my hymen. Very much a "you shall not pass" moment.

When I tried again with a male thinking that maybe it was just because the other one sucked as a person and disgusted me as an individual and other men would be different, I almost threw up during intimacy and cried (which didn't keep him from forcing me to sex acts I didn't want and which made me sick and hurt me anyway).

Genuine question: do y'all think it's possible to be lesbian when you're with a man for years? To be lesbian and have kids with your husband? Could it be internalized lesbophobia and lack of solid French lesbian community ? Or is it genuinely impossible in your opinion?

Because at the same time...a lot of these women also spent like 15, 20y with their current partners and couldn't be with men anymore if they were single.

But it bothers me. From one hand, this book is good at getting rid of the guilt of having been with men/raped by men, but on the other hand...I genuinely couldn't relate to the average narrative there. There was I believe 1-2 lesbian only who were gold stars and while some say men weren't for them or were a mistake...I haven't seen strong words against men and the male body or penises.

Like, for me, what makes me call myself a lesbian is not just my love/desire/attraction to women, it's also my repulsion for the male body, no matter how much I attempted to "fix" it. (Kinda TMI) And looking in hindsight to all the signs, like constantly ""joking"" "haha but what if I'm a lesbian" or being against traveling (before caving in the pressure) because just reading about penetration genuinely made me sick to the stomach and made me dizzy in a bad way, even before I was confronted to actual irl dicks (that plus dysphoria). I went with men in the first place because I'm fucked up and struggle to dissociate friendship, fear and love, and my ex was the first person who seemed to not treat me like garbage (the very first days we met online at least, afterwards it's a very different story) and because I had problems with alcohol and stuff and thought I was pansexual because I was attracted to women but never asking myself if I ever felt something for men (I didn't, except fear. Which sometimes gets tangled with having "butterflies" because again, I'm fucked up).

Idk, for me lesbianism by definition is tied to repulsion or at the very least indifference towards the male body (all the male bodies, not just the ones who traumatized you), not just attraction to the female body, which can be bisexuality.

I'm also curious (since I see this hot topic a lot) about everyone's opinion about women who simp for, say, fictional men (maybe even exclusively feminine male characters, created to cater to a female audience). Who for example have fantasies about them, which don't involve penetrative sex, thinking of dicks or male characteristics they'd be confronted to irl like smell and hair and average moid behaviours. Could it be internalized homophobia/misogyny? A way to feel safe/deal with some ossues they had with males? Can they be lesbians (maybe lesbian in denial)? If so, does it i stop once they accept themselves? Or is it a dead giveaway of bisexuality? Curious of what radfems think about this since I've since very varying opinions on Reddit and such and met women like that irl.

#radblr #radical feminism #radical lesbian #adult female #adult female homosexual #female homosexuality #personal #Tañ ha Gerioù #radfems do touch #french radfem #radical feminist community

14 notes · View notes

cistematicchaos · 1 year

Text

I think a lot of people don't understand that while trans men* very rarely have any foothold against cis women misogyny-wise, its also very rare for trans women** to be able to wield any power against either of those groups, misogyny-wise in particular. Like, cis women fuck over trans men in discussions of reproductive justice and excuse it with all manner of ridiculous excuses but the same thing happens all the fucking time to trans women in feminist discussions/spaces and it comes from all sides, trans and cis.

I think discussing misogyny and feminism and being trans inclusive is very, very important. But it means fuck all to trans inclusion if you're not actively fighting transphobia/transmisogyny/intersexism, ect, ect as well and it means fuck all if we can't discuss the fact some of y'all are only blaming men for the restriction of reproductive rights in places like the US while ignoring the white supremacy and intersectional bigotry at hand and excluding trans men from your activism because you want something simple and familiar, like feminism before you pretended to give a fuck about trans people. It means fuck all if we can't discuss the fact some of y'all want 2010 feminism back because you're transmisogynistic assholes who never worked through your bullshit. It means fuck all when we STILL CAN'T discuss the fact TERFs and radfems recruit trans men and AFAB transmascs because they know the power y'all can hold in feminist spaces over trans women and they'll own up to that even if plenty of y'all won't. It means fuck all when plenty of cis women will actively exclude trans men from discussions of misogyny because they really don't want to understand how trans people fit into feminism. It means fuck all if we can't discuss the fact feminism means NOTHING while most folks, trans and cis alike, ignore intersexism unless it'll handily prove some sort of point.

It means fuck all if we don't acknowledge the state of feminism is abysmal and will go nowhere if no one wants to put in the fucking work. And putting in the fucking work DOES mean acknowledging privilege, it does mean working to understand these systems of oppression, it does mean actually understanding intersectionality instead of treating it like a subtract or addition problem in a second grade textbook.

I've rambled here but I'm trying to say y'all have got to at least admit you HAVE these privileges in order to ask yourselves the important questions. Like: do I want liberation more than I want to oppress someone else? And: how many friends am I willing to lose for the right reasons?

*Or other trans folks who fall into a similar societal position, like a lot of transmascs

**Or other trans folks who fall into a similar societal position, like a lot of transfems

26 notes · View notes

alicornairport · 2 years

Text

Second character playlist!

Come get y'all's Marcy Music.

Marcy

Adam Neely × Ben Levin - ELLEN / OPRAH

We start with weirdly vibing pathos (this is recurring in most of my character playlists lol).

I feel like this song is perfect for that feeling of half-dissociated floating through life feeling and perpetual social outsider status that seems to have been all Marcy all the time pre-Amphibia.

Escaping to as many brightly-colored worlds as she can, watching everything as if through a screen:

I zoom further lost in glowing geometry Ellen in the nightmare, Oprah on the screen Watching people live takes the life out of me Waiting for the light at the edges of my dream to die like an old whale lying on a beach

Can you tell this playlist started around True Colors?

Janelle Monaé - Dance Or Die / Faster

I always feel weird about putting songs in a character playlist when they're from a musical or concept album cause. y'know. they've already got characters and a story attached.

None of that matters cause this 2-part song is more Marcy than ArchAndroid to me (sorry Janelle).

First we have this in the intro:

Oh these dreams are forever If you leave, now or never

and I just can't help but think of Marcy alone, in a library, reading about this last resort that'll let her cling to her dreams and live them out, let her leave, but not the way she was supposed to.

And then:

Telling lies and telling lies will put your face on fire Run and tell your friends to never dream, never win

and

Rising and a waking, yes sir here comes the sun March into the war and with the kick of the drum

Breathe, live, help, give Focus, trance, wake up, dance!

You see the daylight comes into the kingdom But the kingdom's full of ignorant men Just keep rebelling away, you gotta dream it away

it covers everything, from Marcy's time as a ranger to her regret to the lies she tells herself intentionally, to Darcy and IDK it just gets to me. Especially with the frantic pace. I can feel the restlessness of an entire society resting on your shoulders and your own mistakes breathing down your neck but you can't stop and if you don't stop it's all fun.

How Marcy thinks the Newtopians see her, and how she sees herself in this reality where Amphibia is fantasy wish fulfillment: the main character - the Chosen One:

A long long way to find the one We'll keep on dancing till she comes These dreams are forever Oh these dreams are forever (Forever, forever, forever, forever) And if you wanna wake the sun Just keep on marching to the drums These dreams are forever Oh these dreams are forever

And finally, even tho it's in the middle of the song, how I think she might see Andrias at the very end:

I'm praying for the man sitting without much time May he understand the clock will never rewind [...] Hate no more, said he must hate no more

half•alive - arrow

Life begins to happen when I plan something else Trying to be somebody, but all I got was someone else

a lot of someones, actually. i'm so sorry

But more seriously, I feel like this applies to Marcy even without The Core. Life keeps happening at her, both on Earth and in Amphibia, and no matter how much she plans, there's no guarantee the other people involved want the same things as her, and when she tries to escape, she does it by becoming someone else, whether it's through games or just straight up transforming herself into who she thought Andrias expected and/or Newtopia needed.

The hardest place to be Is right where you are In the space between The finish and the start It's the arrow in your heart

The arrow was meant to be meataphorical but now I can only think about the terrible imagery pun with. y'know.

anyway

IVY SOLE. - Storm

This was the first song I put on here after Olivia and Yunan, and it shows. But it's also just. All of it. It's very Marcy-on-the-chair 5 minutes after the episode ends:

I got swept up in the ocean Undercurrent held my feet Ain’t no air for me to breath down here Only salt and the fear from the deep And now I've only got two options Grow some gills or fight the waves I don’t want no one to save me from myself I know that it’s my storm to tame

also guilt. Lots of guilt.

Til the surface comes in reach Til the dark don’t feel too much like home Til the sand run through my fingers Til my heart and mind feel like my own Til the sky don’t seem so far, far away

Hozier - In A Week

It's there. I can't really explain why with canon examples. I just HC that Marcy dealt with her guilt (especially over Anne's parents worrying that they were dead) by basically thinking exactly what this song says, first drenched in sadness ("we'll never be found and it'll hurt them so much") and then with the same sweetness and longing as the actual song, turning it into something positive: "we'll never be found. We can reinvent ourselves and turn this into home, with each other."

Billie Eilish - everything i wanted

Listen when I saw this in the storyboarders' playlist for Marcy I s c r e a m e d. But. It's so perfect. Every single line. Go listen to it.

Lenty Av - Marcy's Truth

[heart-rending instrumental remix of Marcy's Theme]

Death Note The Musical - Mortals & Fools

This is here entirely because @/cutetanuki-chan made an annearcy comic set to this where Darcy tries to convince Anne that Marcy is now beyond both love and salvation and I can't hear this anymore without imagining it as an internal conversation between Marcy and The Core.

Oh Geeez - Awakening

This is one of the best Amphibia fan songs I've heard and all of the lyrics are both amazing and depressing, but this is what made me immediately download the song (and put it in this playlist) after I first heard it:

Lately my head’s on fire and my voice is not my own...

So if this is the last time that I’m in my mind I need you to know That I only wanted to keep you close These days have been so dark and quiet and cold And I’m longing for somebody to hold The walls are closing in, and I’ve been run clean through So if this is the last time, then until the next life I’ll dream of you

vylet pony - object permanence (home videos and other snapshots related and otherwise)

everything I know just keeps slipping from my object permanence when I try to imagine home

Ray Chen ft. Sting - What Could've Been

I love Arcane so much my brain splits in two in order to contain the fact that this song is both about Jinx blaming Vi for leaving her and Marcy resenting Andrias.

lollaby - seams

Go listen to lollaby now. This is a fan song so it's literally made to fit Marcy exactly but I genuinely think it's right beside scars (also by lollaby :p ) as the best Amphibia fan song ever. I'm not even exaggerating; I'm underselling how great this song is. Especially these lines:

three stars burning bright come from beyond to expel the night three stars fall apart forever scarred they were doomed from the start and it's all my fault now i stand alone you two look happy on your own i am you and you are me our fates determined by that goddamn prophecy so let us make a toast to the parasite's host to the minds pulling the strings and to the glory of the ruined king

and:

maybe it's better to be left behind maybe it's time i said goodbye to these childhood friends of mine

(yes i know i just posted like 80% of the lyrics, but the way this incorporates lines from the show as parallels is just aaaaaaaaaaa)

lost memory machine - 地下涛声

Marcy on the castle balcony, as this fantasy of a reality washes over her.

The sound of underground waves She closed her eyes tightly the Gold Coast in the distance lonely city walls cutting through the forest It all comes from what she's read Deep blue early morning sky lifts the curtain off the day

Marcy, as she floats in a tank away from all light.

It can't compare To what she had But it's all lost now Keep getting more To lose it all

*this is all (maybe badly) translated from Cantonese by me.

Phoebe Bridgers - Chinese Satellite

This is in Anne's playlist too, but it fits Marcy better. I see it as her coming to terms with moving away, after everything, even if some part of her would rather stay.

lollaby - scars

The "canon" playlist ends at Chinese Satellite, but this is just... too amazing to leave off. The alternate ending that this paints (heavily leaning on when we thought they would all get much worse scarring) is incredibly sad but terribly hopeful. It breaks my heart just to put it back together.

Please listen to lollaby :p

#i don't even know why i'm doing these lmao #i don't really like how the painting for this one turned out compared to the anne one but #amphibia #art #fanart #marcy wu #me talking about media #the core #darcy wu #analysis #?#music #playlist #music recommendation #artists on tumblr

47 notes · View notes

papirouge · 1 year

Note

Okay, as an autistic guy, I don't fully understand how you are radical feminism / TERF but not pro abortion

Like, aren't y'all always saying that you want men to die? And the burden of patriarchy and boyhood or how it's sexist to be forced to caretaker or whatever?

Aren't abortion like, things that can help reach you guys goal?

Also please don't use the r-slur next time

First of all, I don't take orders from randoms of the internet popping in my inbox. If a statement is retarded then it is retarded regardless of someone's intelligence/mental capability. If you're taking it personally, that's your problem.

Secondly, who's the "you" you're talking about when you say "y'all want men to die"? Although I never identified myself as a radfem, I've orbitted around them long enough to know that there are straight radfem who literally get shit for not entertaining the same hatred as separatists who are those are into this KAM (= kill all men) lunacy.

Those straight radfem do seek to male companionship and potentially a family so it's ridiculous to paint radical feminism as a movement actively seeking to eradicate malehood. Those straight radfem get shit in by kam radfem separatists for not wanting men dead so it's crazy that you're painting radical feminism as a monolith when there are so many internal conflicts and opinions lol Pro life radfem are definitely a thing.

Actually, trying to define radical feminism centering male fate is very patriarchy-oriented, and shows how little knowledge you have about radical feminism.

And anyone having a remote idea of what's laying behind abortion culture knows that it's absolutely misogynist. Abortion treats women's body like a commodity (abortion affects the body and female's fecondity), and sustains the idea that a woman with children is a problem (don't you find interesting that companies are paying for their employees abortion? "eat the rich" abortionists are clowns lol). Instead of building a society more accomodating for mothers and their family, we simply tell them they should've rather not having kids altogether. Pro abortionisys barely adress the struggle (poor) single mother face in society, because the only solution they shove is abortion, and they go blind about any other situation where women chose to keep their child. However pro life groups do offer support and ressources for those mother to become.

Pro life groups are more feminists than any pro abortion radical feminist thinking a woman is only free if she has the right to kill their offspring. Murder isn't freedom, and it's highkey offensive that this narrative is recklessly being spread around in pro abortion circles. If your freedom relies on harming or killing someone, you're a psychopath. Period.

Also have you ever considered that abortion also kills female fetus and that obsessively defending it despite acknowledging this is also misogynist ? I've addressed several times the cognitive dissonance of radfem weeping about China's one child policy and the systemic abortion of young girls, but didn't care about their local abortion clinic aborting female fetus en masse. Their only defense was "bUt tHey Don'T sYstEmiCaLlY tArgEttT fEmAle fEtUse" as if it changed anything about female fetus being killed. 🙄 Context might be different, the result remains the same. It's just a silly cope out.

Oh I won't even begin with planned Parenthood accepting donation to kill black babies which automatically puts any one defending this company as an ennemy since I'm a Black woman🤷🏾‍♀️

#answered #pro life

4 notes · View notes

signalwatch · 1 year

Text

Musical Watch: Seven Brides for Seven Brothers (1954)

the movie that posits: women love being abducted and held against their will

Watched: 02/07/2022

Format: HBOmax

Viewing: First (and possibly last)

Director: Stanley Donen

Holy cats, y'all.

I... I don't even know where to start. There's so, so many angles to this thing, so I'll try and capture my thoughts as best I can.

I want to be very clear - Until this film, I (perhaps wrongly) believed I'm *pretty good* at contextualizing the cultural differences between our social norms and mores and those of yesteryear. I may even be able to do period-piece stuff made in prior decades, trying to grok what the people of 1954 found charming about frontier life.

In general, I can see a film and say "yes, I understand that there were ways that we viewed gender/ race/ manners/ religion/ etc.. that no longer reflect how we'd likely feel now" and I can go on with my life.

But. Y'all. I am adrift.

My take-away is that the current interest in this film by classic film buffs is rubber-necking, ironic appreciation, or just outright hate-watching. Or not! Classic film buffs are an unruly bunch. In its release year, this movie was very successful, financially and critically. So I don't know anything about mankind anymore.

I've now seen the movie, and will only watch it again if it's my opportunity to bring the madness to the people.

Some thoughts:

This is a movie which endorses kidnapping at best and possibly abduction and rape, depending on your reading of both the film's text and the much referred/ basis of the film to Abduction/ Rape of the Sabine Women - a well known bit of Roman mythology/ history that this movie turns into a jaunty tune to set up all the events of the second half of the film

It's clearly also somewhere between a movie about the powers of Stockholm Syndrome and the successful establishment of a cult

This movie is the future incels want. It's a movie about men minus women who feel they *deserve* women and take radical action

Every single character in this movie is an absolute moron

This movie needed to end in a body count - there's no other believable finish

The movie is a musical with zero memorable songs except for the one where you're like "Are they.... singing about mass rape?" Johnny Mercer, I believe was responsible, and that seems insane

The main character (Howard Keel) is maybe the greatest asshole to ever grace the screen. It's breathtaking. Just a real shitbag from his first line to his last. When he's not insisting himself upon women, he's treating his new wife as domestic help. And he's the one who thinks "hey, let's just go raid a town and collect its women for our own personal gratification." He's an absolute psychopath.

The movie has this same lead state "all women are basically the same" and therefore fungible. The movie never puts the lie to this idea. So, good news, ladyfolk. One of you is swappable for the other, really. It's just a matter of hair color preference.

There's a dance number that's really pretty rock solid in the middle

Someone tell me what the brothers are farming up there on the sides of mountains. Somebody. Anybody. Rocks? branches?

Julie Newmar is in this movie, she's a head taller than all the other women and she clearly complicates every shot she's in. But she's Julie @#$%ing Newmar, so you keep her in the @#$%ing movie

I cannot imagine the smells in the house of the brothers. Like - simply can't wrap my head around it

Russ Tamblyn's career is fucking wild, man

Up until watching this movie, I thought it was about the mail-order-bride shenanigans of the 19th century, where, 160 years before 90 Day Fiancee, lonely-hearts on the frontier would correspond to women in the East, and those women would (sometimes) come out and marry them.* This isn't the plot at all.

Instead, Howard Keel is a mountain man/ rock farmer in 19th Century Oregon (which was semi-settled as an all-White colony at one point, and this movie does not challenge that idea). He comes down to town once a year to buy goods for his farm, and this time he also wants a wife. And, after 5 minutes of looking, he finds one in Jane Powell. Without mentioning he's bringing her to live by herself with his six brothers and basically be the maid. Who he will pork, I guess. It's very sophisticated.

Because she has an American can-do spirit, she actually goes along with this instead of getting right back in the wagon and going back.

Inspired that their brother is now getting laid, the other 6 brothers go to a barn-raising/ hoe-down, dance, and basically harass girls and fight with the locals like the worst hillbillies to ever fall out of a tree. Convinced they'll not be allowed to court the girls, the brothers then sneak into town, throw the girls in bags and ride off with them (no, really), intentionally blocking themselves into their own farm for winter by causing a deadly avalanche when the parents, siblings and townsfolk try to save the girls. Who are in bags.

By the way, I have no idea how anyone eats anymore within two months of the girls' arrival, but worrying about "how will people eat if we double the population of our compound?" is not an issue in this movie and because the journey for the girls is to eventually fall in love with their captors is more important, we never learn what the bathroom situation is. I had a lot of logistical questions.

After months of assuming their children had been held like a bunch of Kimmy Schmidts for months on end, when the pass clears and the town-folk make their way to the farm, the girls all lie about being pregnant so they can get married to their favorite toothless hillbilly. Because brainwashing or something. The movie makes no effort to explain that the brothers somehow de-asshole-ify. We just see them wandering around in colorful shirts.

And, curtain.

People loved this movie. It has awards. It did boffo box office.

I feel like you have to have the mind of a small child who can't conceive of bad things happening to good people to not be mostly horrified by the entire film.

If anyone can tell me how this isn't a Blumhouse creation, I'd appreciate it.

*it was a profitable scam then and now as women would ask for money and then just stop corresponding when the money quit showing up.

https://ift.tt/yNJex90

from The Signal Watch https://ift.tt/fSDlPts

5 notes · View notes

uwusillygirl · 1 year

Note

i truly loved reading your thoughts about this. it would be so fun if maybe you could occasionally post recs of your favorite books/movies/shows and maybe briefly share opinions on them? only if that would be fun for you of course! i'm just saying i, and i'm positive many of your readers/followers, would be delighted to see them!

you are absolutely right regarding NP featuring a parade of horrifying clueless men masquerading as doms where all of marianne's masochistic tendencies seem to get repeatedly exploited without the scenes being "resolved" in any meaningful or helpful way. & instead of an ideal result of her feeling somewhat better and at peace, they leave her the same raw bleeding wound of a girl. and your take on connell needing to prove to himself he's good and good TO marianne when in reality many times he has been anything but... really brilliant. i don't think i've ever thought of it that way, as lost as i was in my harrumphing about what i took as rooney's repeated portrayal of slow vanilla sex being equated to true quasi-soulmate-bond love and affection. though i am first to admit i am a very sensitive girl who will immediately take things to heart if i see myself in a piece of fiction, and sometimes miss the bigger literary analysis picture. i'm so glad i sent an ask! also lol @ paul and daisy definitely sacrificing some canon information to say get behind me BDSM baddies of all types we got y'all. (also idk if you've seen/heard but paul mescal is in a film called "aftersun" that i believe is playing in select theaters right now which from my understanding is a very dreamy and melancholy potentially-hysterical-tear-inducing two hours of him being a young girl dad. i have not seen it yet because i think it might actually break my brain in a very dangerous way that i am not equipped for atm, and i am already pre-mourning my sanity and emotional stability for when i finally bite the bullet)

also as someone who has full on sobbed to your beautiful cathartic words many times over, i am grateful to you for exploring freaky mentally unstable girls who maybe should re-evaluate their relationship to sex but also maybe shouldn't because sometimes it's ok to be insane and slutty if you have a partner to support you through it! if drugs can't fix you maybe having 15 orgasms in a row can! even though i think i am different from your chrissy in many ways, i have never felt so validated by a character and never felt so hopeful and fulfilled seeing her clawing her way to happiness. sometimes it feels like you've taken stuff from the darkest stickiest ugliest parts of my brain and put it on paper and i'm like ok well now i've got to have a three week crisis to deal with this now, except it usually ends in some necessary acceptance and potential healing and always at least a temporary period of bright hope for the future (which is so difficult to come by some days). so thank YOU!

i loved reading what you had to say, as well! thank you so much for sharing (u actually got my brain all crazy and now i'm writing a little something that'll hopefully be up tonight lmao)! i would be SO happy to share recs (including ones tailored to specific interests!) if that's something people would like! anyone can lmk! i watch and read a shit ton for my work, actually, so i'm always so happy to share thoughts. it'll give my loved ones a break from my random excitable rants, too.

going a little out of order here, but i have found that the day i let go of trying to understand, rid of, or narrativize my sexuality, gender expression, and sexual interests and just say "whether it came from some event or is inherent or is a choice, it just is what it is, and that's okay" it paradoxically became way less of an issue for me, and way easier to express what i like and want just for the sake of it. in my opinion, there's only so much exploring we can do before it becomes a sort of ouroboros of "i'm trying to work stuff out for me" turning into "i'm trying to be sexually palatable in a new way".

"get behind me bdsm baddies" is so fucking funny. i have actually seen aftersun and was one of the original hysterical criers over it. i can confirm it is a life ruiner, and yet i'm going in for a rewatch on sunday. best movie of the year in my opinion!

i am so flattered that first one's free has moved you! it's more than okay to be insane and slutty! i don't know you, but can pretty confidently say that your darkest stickiest ugliest parts of your brain are not that bad if my chrissy expresses them - she may think she's a mess but i think she (and anyone who resonates with her) is doing just great and is a good person deserving of good things <3 if i didn't believe that then i'd also be so fucked lmao.

hope the near future brings you those good things! glad to hear you're finding spaces to feel hopeful.

please send an ask whenever, i'm so glad you reached out!

#asks #partial first one's free inspiration

2 notes · View notes

masterthespianduchovny · 2 years

Note

It's extremely isolating! And when you said, "But we’ll never make sense to a world who doesn’t want to understand us." You hit the nail on the head. People do not offer grace or understanding because they are threatened or racist or insecure and when we accept that, when we don't internalize it, and we still find a way to move forward, they use that as a reason to hate even more. They always have to feel comfortable before we get seen as humans. And I don't get why the world always has to be coddled; why, for example, Sydney's respect and humanity have to be conditional. I think that's why so many people have shit on her for the pre-order situation. Did she mess up? Yes. She knows she did. They got so mad at her for not "owning up to it" and they are missing the point. The issue was that Carmy devolved into the same shitty, abusive person they both could not stand. He became the very thing that traumatized them. Ultimately, he is responsible, but no one wants to say that. Everyone thinks a man like Carmy gets to have all the power but none of the accountability. And that's what made everything blow up. That's the real crux of the issue, which they don't want to understand or analyze. And they insist that she and Marcus need to apologize back to Carmy. They were not abusive to Carmy. He could have chosen any other way to respond and he chose the worst option. In my opinion, it doesn't matter what someone does, if you blow up at them like that, you don't deserve an apology (unless they were being abusive first might be the only exception). Carmy is the boss, Carmy is the one in power, and he abused that. They were not all on a level playing field that day because Carmy decided to pull rank and shit on them. Yes, Sydney and Marcus fumbled, but Carmy's reaction was not proportionate to their mistakes. So I find it really sus that a lot of people are like, "They aren't being held accountable. They didn't apologize." My question is, why are y'all SO desperate to have them be subservient to Carmy? When the whole time before that, he treated them with respect? Why does Carmy get a pass for doing what he did? I would have fucking left too! I've left jobs for less. Honestly, I probably would have fought him lol. I would have been really pissed off that he acted like that. A lot of viewers are not tapping into the fact that they have a very punitive mindset and they also believe that people like Sydney and Marcus should be "put in their place". Just say you hate black people and women and black women and go. Please.

Sorry about the late reply! Been working overtime and my sleep schedule is fucked.

Sydney’s respect and humanity is conditional because that’s the implicit negotiation they make to uphold the patriarchy and white supremacy whether or not they know it.

Because to treat Sydney, a black woman, as an equal means they have to disregard a system that benefitted them for centuries. It means they have to own their mistakes. It means non white men are allowed to make mistakes. It means that people other than them are flawed, imperfect, and complex. They both think so little of us while holding us to impossible standards, and then getting upset at Sydney when she meets or exceeds the standard.

And what’s worse is that Sydney doesn’t internalize these messages and agreements that they need to function. Not only does she not internalize or accept it, she rejects it. She mocks and ridicules it. She taunts white mediocrity to its face.

It’s funny because Carmy was the one who empowered her. He made her second in command, he doesn’t question how she runs shit and gladly handed that responsibility over, but most importantly, he defends her. So, in their minds, she’s been “getting away” with shit for a while. Then when she rebels against Carmy, they use his anger as a way to get back at her by “defending” him. She “needs” to apologize. How dare she not try to say sorry for what she did?!!!?

Imho, their reaction is pretty telling. Either they’ve never been in a position of power or they’ve never been accountable and that’s why they don’t understand why neither she or Marcus have to apologize nor is it expected. I think they will, but for other reasons. For Sydney, it’ll be about building trust back (which Carmy will have to do as well on a deeper level) for serving the dish. And it won’t be about the critic, but Syd learning to take criticism and be patient. Her trusting Carmy like he’s trying to trust her by breaking out of his comfort zone.

Let’s be real, they really see themselves as Richie, but need to “side” with Carmy to get back at Sydney. Carmy is an overachiever who has reached heights that most never will and certainly not themselves with how content they are with their mediocrity.

And that’s facts: they weren’t on an even playing field with that shit Carmy pulled. There is no way to be accountable to your boss in the way they want. It’s just not possible.

Because for POC the way to respect white people is to be subservient to them. Carmy never wanted them to feel like lessers and that’s exactly how they want the act and feel.

Americans are very punitive and refuse to unpack why that is and why it’s counterproductive.

When your self worth centers around thinking black people (and black women) are less than you, you get a little resentful when it’s not shown in screen. When the black people have self worth and refuses to be disrespected. When their humanity is acknowledged it feels offensive because society isn’t supposed to do that.

💀💀💀 Carmy had the right ones in that sense because some definitely would have fought him. Lol.

Lastly, many have been conditioned to accept shitty behavior and believe others should accept it as well. They believe in blind respect and accepting fault because you made one mistake when the entirety of it wasn’t your fault. They have no backbone or sense of self worth. Just followers deeply molded by white supremacy.

#the bear mail #give a bit to answer the other ask #:)

4 notes · View notes

honey-tea-and-cookies · 2 years

Text

Placements That Are Lowkey Red Flags 👀

Hi everyone! Some of my other posts are sickeningly sweet, and while I love making those, I've decided we need a change. Y'all deserve to be put in your fuckin place lmao. Anyway, enjoy my bullying <3

Please note: PLEASE DON'T READ IF YOU'RE EASILY HURT! THIS IS MEANT TO BE FUNNY! Also, this is just my opinion, and as always, there are never any bad placements. I'm a stranger on the internet, what I think about your placement literally could not matter less. Another reminder that (as I said before) there are no bad placements, and it's all about how you use them :)

- I've gone on about this before, so I won't rant too much, but Libra Sun men. They got the Mansplain and Manipulate, but none of the Malewife 😔💔. They are no good. Not a fan!!! Something I didn't talk about in my last post is the way they kinda gaslight?? I can't provide any examples you just gotta believe me. Underdeveloped Libra Sun men are just such people pleasers that they'll totally change themselves to fit you, and you end up becoming friends and trying to build a connection with someone who isn't real. Very ingenuine, can't stand up for what they believe in because what they believe in is so flimsy, can't have a real relationship. Sorry guys <3

- Scorpio Moon. Now, I definitely have met nice Scorpio Moons, I'm even friends with some!! (Only one, but you know). They are just so black and white?? You know exactly where you stand. Which is great!! Except for when they don't like you. It doesn't even take a whole lot to piss them off! Sometimes they're just off and decide they don't like you. And they get mean. Then when they feel better, expect you to be fine?? No sir, you just ruthlessly insulted me in front of everyone. Why would be be besties again, immediately?? Sort your shit out please and thank you🙏

- Taurus Sun/Mercury. Y'all are sus. You would chew me out for a petty or stupid reason, and not let up even once I apologise. Y'all are also the type to double-down when you realise you are wrong. My Aqua Mercury will fight you to the death, because I do the same thing and arguing with you gets us nowhere. Just suck it up and admit I'm always right smh 🙄🙄.

- Gemini Venus. Flaky?! Just stick to the damn plans man. Yes, I know you hate how I need at least 3 business-days notice before we hang out. But I hate how you're able to just get up and *DO* things??That feels scary and irresponsible and like disaster waiting to happen. You're scary. Also, if ANYONE is going to get cancelled, it's you guys. Probably cyberbullied a child or something idk. Gossipy. Should be feared by those who don't want to be talked about.

- Aquarius Mars. Oh you DEFINITELY cyberbully people. Also probably ghost people. It's mostly because they pissed you off, or have different political opinions to you, or wanted too much from you. I get it, they deserved it. But that doesn't mean you can just stop all communication. That's mean </3. Please learn to use your words and communicate, I'm actually begging.

- Aries Moon. Please shut up. For once. I say that with affection and understand, but god do I mean it. I don't care if it's funny, I don't care if it'll be a great story, I don't care if it makes you look cool. That's a stupid thing to do and you WILL get in trouble. Don't be stupid. Y'all need a full time babysitter. Mostly if you have other fire (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius) or air (Gemini, Libra, Aquarius) placements, but this still goes for all Aries Moons in one way or another.

Okay everyone! This is all my bullying for today. I'm really sorry if I hurt anyone's feelings! That was not my intention. All of this was said as a joke (my love language is making fun of people lol). Thank you so much for reading, and tell me what you think! Sending you all so much love <333

811 notes · View notes

sadomas0chist · 3 years

Text

perfect strangers

MINORS DNI // 18+

part one; part two; part three

genre: nsfw

pairing: jean kirschtein x female reader

word count: 2.4k

tags/warnings: dom jean, simultaneous masturbation, penetrative sex, oral receiving (female), fingering, swearing, casual sex, partying, make-out session, brother’s best friend, breeding kink, belly bulge.

synopsis: despite being Connie's sister, you were never half the party animal he was. at the moment, getting good grades on your last semester took all your time which made one of your good friends, Hitch, drag you out of your room to the party your brother hosted. what could possibly happen, other than sleeping with your brother's best friend?

a.n. : i was thinking about turning this into a short series but i’m still debating whether i should go for it or not. anyway, enjoy!!!

update: i actually turned this into a series ;) part two is up!!

Being the sister of one of the most chaotic human beings on earth had its drops. I was supposed to be studying for my last semester which was pretty difficult and needed a full-time concentration.

Instead, I was getting dolled up by one of my best friends, Hitch, who was practically begging me to get out of my room and party. "Don't be so nerdy, it's not like you need the extra credit. Connie will be sad if you don't show up. He's been whining to Sasha all day long how his own sister didn't want to attend his own party." She applied some red lipstick to my lips and popped hers as a sign that she was done.

"Hitch, I really appreciate y'all getting worried about me going crazy, but I'm fine really. You know I'm only going because I missed you and the girls." I stood up from my bed and walked to my vanity, gasping at how sexy I looked.

Hitch smacked my ass in response. "Your ass looks good in this dress. Get some tonight." I raised my eyebrow at her. She knew I wasn't in the mood to mess around and get attached again. I shrugged it off and opened my bedroom door.

"Wait, why didn't he invite them to our house?" I stopped, watching her make her way in front of me.

"He needed more space. And a pool. Now come on we're going to be late." she reached out to grab my hand and dragged me out of my house.

***

"Oh goodness..." I mumbled to myself when I noticed how crowded the place was. Some people were already drunk and throwing up on the grass and in garbage cans, others were shamelessly rubbing on each other, while the rest was either in the pool or at the bar.

"Oh, there's Connie." She pointed at my brother who gave her a tight hug. "Look who's here!" she cheered shaking my shoulders.

"Hey," I smiled and hugged him. "All good?" he smiled down at me and pat my head. I nodded and threw him back a smile. "Aight then, I'm gonna get going. Take care." he pointed at me jogging backward and eventually turned around and disappeared into the crowd.

A pat on my shoulder made me turn around, a grin instantly forming on my lips when I noticed that this hand belonged to Sasha. She jumped in my arms, squeezing me tightly. "Jeez I thought you were dead, never isolate yourself like that again." I chuckled taking a bite of her hot dog. "Hey!" she smacked my arm almost making me choke on the meat.

We caught up on a few things, our conversation getting steamier as Hitch began to mention her sex life and how we should be taking notes.

“No, but really, all jokes aside. I wouldn’t be surprised if you’re not getting laid. I don’t even think you know how to pull men anymore babe, full offense.” She took a swing of her beer and shrugged her shoulders. I scoffed, clearly offended.

“Working my ass off for college doesn’t change anything in my flirting techniques.” I scoffed “You know what? I’ll prove it to you right now. Your pick.” I raised my hands up, challenging her. Sasha jumped in excitement next to me while Hitch was inspecting our surroundings.

“Him.” she pointed at the bar. I scrunched my face when I saw a guy who looked musty and crusty. “Girl, not him. Him.” she held my jaw with her hand and tilted my head. My eyes landed on a tall male, manspreading on the stool as his back was leaning against the wooden bar, watching everyone’s move. His elbows were resting on the wood, his right hand holding his drink, swirling it around.

He looked delicious with his tight black shirt and chinos, squeezing him in all the right places. His hair was slicked back, almost dropping to his shoulders. His facial features weren’t clear enough due to the distance I was standing from, but his jawline looked good enough.

He didn’t look like he was expecting company or was here with someone. I smirked and shook her hand, accepting her challenge. “What do you want me to do?”

“Make out with him. You’ve kissed strangers before. I’d like to see if you still have the balls to do it.” I shook my head with a grin. Frankly, I was expecting her to task me with something much worse.

“Done.” Sasha jumped in excitement and Hitch shook my hand. “Watch, and learn.” I turned on my heels and walked to the bar where he was sitting.

“Hey you,” I hissed, getting his attention. “Don’t move,” I whispered as I positioned myself between his legs and grabbed his jaw, placing my lips on his.

From here it could go two ways: he either pushes me off and tells me he’s into guys- yes it happened before, not a pleasant memory- or he kisses me back.

At first, he was shaken. However, it didn’t take him too long to snake his arm around my waist and pull me closer to him, deepening the kiss. He freed his hand from the glass he was holding and wrapped it around the back of my neck, pushing me closer.

I parted my lips, his tongue gently sliding in and toying with mine. When I finally decided it was enough, I let go of him and pulled away, a slight trail of saliva hanging from our lips.

Without adding any other word, I grinned at him and left. He didn’t say anything and sincerely I’m glad he didn’t. He clearly enjoyed it as well.

“Oh my God you actually did that.” she squeaked, shaking my shoulders.

“Hitch, it's not the first time. Also, he was a good kisser. Now, do you believe me?”

She sighed in defeat and nodded. Sasha was long gone, probably dragged to the dance floor by Connie and soon enough Marlo was here to drag Hitch too. I found this as an opportunity to go to the bathroom.

To my surprise, it was empty and clean. I checked if my mascara was still intact and if I needed to fix my lipstick. While I was applying some lipstick on, a group of girls came in, obviously tipsy, and started talking about the guys they wanted to fuck.

“There’s this tall dude with long hair, ugh girl I just want to hump him.” one of them giggled, leaning on her friend for support.

“Stephanie!! He was with a black-haired girl, don't be a slut.” her friend smacked her.

I cocked my eyebrow and added some mascara. I gathered my stuff and texted Hitch that I was going back home.

It was getting lame and my brother was in no way to be seen. I’m sure Hitch and Sasha would understand. I’ve been too focused on my studies and partying wasn’t what I needed right now.

I walked to the gates and waited for a taxi.

“Already leaving?” a voice echoed behind me, startling me. I jumped around to be met with the same dude I made out with, this time, a leather jacket resting on his shoulders.

Great.

“I’m not feeling it.” I shrugged.

“You can’t leave alone. Some dudes are total creeps.” He walked to me. His tall frame towering over me, the mixture of alcohol and perfume intoxicating me.

“You could easily be one of them. I don’t know you.”

“Well, if I were, you wouldn’t have made out with me for starters. You look mature enough to distinguish a gentleman from a douchebag.” He grinned, pushing my hair behind my shoulders.

“A gentleman?” I questioned, toying with the pockets of his jacket.

“Only if you want me to be,” he mumbled, raising my chin with his index finger.

We stared at each other for a while. I knew he was another stranger, but he made me feel aroused. Maybe Hitch was right. Maybe I needed some relief. So I did what I thought I’d never do.

“Come over. My brother is having fun at this stupid party and I doubt he’ll be back any time soon.”

I could tell he was hesitating, and to be honest, his silence made me question if I made the right decision asking him to come over. He looked like he didn’t want to take advantage of me. A true gentleman, I thought.

I didn’t really care though. We were both taking advantage of each other in this situation, knowing that we will probably never see each other again after this. It was a one-time thing.

I did have, however, a feeling that I’ve seen him before, but the booze wasn’t making me think straight and I shrugged it off. He didn’t seem to recognize me so there was nothing to be worried about.

“On one condition.” he spoke up. I tilted my head waiting for him to proceed. “Tonight, I’m in control.”

I chuckled and nodded. “If that’s what you want, cowboy then sure thing.”

“Jean.” he handed out his hand for me to shake.

“Y/n.”

***

It didn’t take us a lot of time to find his car and get to my place. As a matter of fact, our clothes dropped instantly on the floor as soon as we went through my bedroom door.

“You’re so hot,” he mumbled between kisses, his hand folding my breast. I giggled throwing my head back, my fingers playing with his hair.

His hands traveled down my body, parting ways as one pressed against my heat and the other squeezed my ass. He worked his digits between my folds, my fingers digging in his shoulders.

He gathered my slick before pushing it back with his middle and ring finger.

“Fuck Jean,” I moaned out. I pushed him closer, licking him from the base of his neck to his earlobe, and gently sucked it.

He sighed and backed me until I reached my bed. “Relax now,” He pushed me down on the mattress and spread my legs. I grabbed my pillow and placed it underneath my hips.

He sat on his knees and put my legs on his shoulders, my cunt a few inches away from him. Locking eyes with me, he gave my opening a long lick.

I hissed as he licked my slit, his thumb rubbing small circles to my clit. My hands gripped onto my sheets, my hips bucking. Damn, he was good.

“Shit, ahh, Jean,” I whimpered, his fingers now massaging my insides as his tongue played with my clit. He hummed against me, sending vibrations all over my heat.

I squealed as I felt myself get closer, my legs shakings on his shoulders.

“Be a good girl and come all over my face eh?” he seduced his fingers going faster inside me, occasionally curling to hit my sweet spot.

“I’m so close, fuck fuck fuck fuck.” I chanted gripping his hair, my head pushing down the mattress as my orgasm drove me over the edge.

He stood back up, his stubble coated with my wetness. He sucked his fingers before making them pop out of his mouth.

“Tastes as good as it looks.” He chuckled. “Spread them lips for me again baby let me see your mess”. he purred pushing his hair back.

Doing as I’m told, I spread my folds with my index and middle finger and bit my lip before running another finger between them, feeling my slick. He groaned as I touched myself, slightly playing with my swollen clit.

“You want me?” Jean stroked himself as I dipped my fingers inside me. I nodded biting harder on my lower lip, watching as he pumped himself, his vein now conspicuous.

He kneeled on my bed, pulling me closer to him. “Then take me.” And with that, he rammed himself in. I yelped at the painful stretch, his hands holding my hips. I grabbed his wrist with a hand and tried to reach my headboard with the other.

Once given the green light, he started moving slowly in and out, making sure I was comfortable. Gentleman alright.

His pace was steady, the moonlight lighting his side. He looked absolutely handsome. I wasn’t fragile, nor delicate whatsoever. Still, he didn’t fuck me just to please himself. He wanted to please me and feel me as much as I wanted to.

“Tell me if I’m hurting you okay?” I nodded with a smile. Jean’s thrusts became faster and harder. The deep long strokes were just appetizers for what he was keeping in store. He was big, but he felt incredibly nice.

My room soon was filled with the sounds of our bodies smacking against each other along with my moans and his grunts.

I was already feeling sensitive from my first orgasm, and his strokes were my g-spot almost perfectly. I was a panting mess beneath him, my makeup smudged across my face.

“Ah fuck, you’re choking me so fucking good.” he whimpered throwing his head back. Droplets of sweat trailed down from his toned chest to his abs. I stared at his tattoos and how they complimented him.

“Feel it y/n.” he grabbed my hand and placed it on my lower stomach. Shit.

“I’m gonna cum again, oh fuck, Jean.” I whimpered, his hips rocking my body. I squirmed under him, his thumb rubbing my pink bud, adding more friction.

I wailed as I felt my orgasm rip through my body, his thrusts getting sloppier. I knew he was close.

Fortunately, I’m always on the pill, so I wrapped my legs around him and pulled him down. “I want you to fill me up, please,” I begged, his face buried in my neck, leaving a love bite.

“I’m going to fill you up so good, so damn good.” He lifted my waist with his arms and pulled me closer. “Fuck, yes, oh fuck, yes.” he whimpered in my ear as he emptied himself in me, warming my walls with his semen.

We lead there for a while, motionless. His dick was limp inside me, his arms still holding me.

He feels warm. I don’t want to move. No, he has to move. I don’t do aftercare.

“That was good,” I said breaking the silence. Jean rolled to his side, his cum instantly leaking out of me as pulled out.

“Indeed. Thank you.” I chuckled at his silly response.

“You don’t thank someone for having sex with them dumbass.” A smile formed on his lips as he stood up to grab some tissues from my nightstand to clean me up.

“I’m a gentleman, remember?” he cleaned off our cum and tossed the tissues in my garbage can. “I should get going, we don’t want your brother to go nuts on you.” I nodded and pulled the sheets to cover my nude body. It was a shame that he was leaving, but as I said, I never did aftercare when it came to casual sex.

He put on his briefs and began pulling up his bottoms, however, the most unexpected thing happened, making him stop in his tracks.

“Hey, y/n I brought you some- Jean?!” Connie yelled dropping the bag of chips he was holding.

“Connie?!” Jean who was now half-clothed yelled back.

“Are you- oh my god- did I just sleep with your sister?” He panicked, holding his head with both hands.

I smacked my mouth, my eyes wide open. What the fuck was I supposed to do in a situation like that.

“You sure as hell did idiot!” my brother replied, now both of the males looking at me.

Well, that’s extremely awkward.

#aot fandom #aot x reader #jean kirschtein imagine #jean kirschtein scenarios #jean kirschtein x reader #jean kirschtein x you #jean kirstein #jean x reader #aot smut #jean kirschtein fanfiction #jean x reader smut #jean x you #jean kirschtein smut #jean smut #jean kirschtien

956 notes · View notes