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olivegardenhunter · 1 month

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The sannin as normal childhood friends who have sleepovers and play games in the forest and bond over liking "gross" animals

anon thank you SO much for this mental image. you have made my very miserable assignment-filled day. I have many thoughts about the sannin and baby sannin being inseparable best friends who were just normal kids make up about 90% of them. here's some hc I have about that (sorry for the massively long post, I'm a yapper at heart)

yes absolutely. I like to think of the sannin as misfits who never fit in anywhere else except with each other. there's so many different reasons for this. we know they became genin at age 6. if this makes them the exception, rather than it being the normal practice for a village in tumultuous times, then this must have meant each of them were prodigies in their own rights in the academy (yes, even Jiraiya I'd say, though I'd suspect his was more a case of recognised potential rather than showing any obvious prodigal talent from the get-go). this is further reinforced by the fact the third hokage became their sensei. I doubt the hokage would've taken up any random group of genin as his students. if this is the case, can you imagine how difficult it must've been for them to make friends with others, their age or otherwise? not only would it be hard to relate to their other peers cause of the age and probably ability gap, but I'd imagine people would've found them downright intimidating! all this, along with all their individual personality which, if their 6 year old selves were anything like their 50 year old selves, would've meant the little baby sannin would not have been anyone's first choice of friends.

so I'd imagine each of them being a bit of loners in the academy. then they get put in a team together. recognise they each stick out like a sore thumb from everyone else, but have all of the above common ground. their personalities are difficult for each to get used to initially, but once they do, these three super super super quickly become absolutely inseperable. to call them family would've been a serious underestimate of their relationship imo.

anyway this is all a long winded way of saying YES they're absolutely those regular childhood best friends who have sleepovers and hang out and play games. I imagine that tsunade grew up with a massive family in a massive loving home. direct contrast to orochimaru who's an orphan and, I imagine jiraiya is an orphan too (hence no canon last name). therefore, the senju compound is typically the designated sleepover venue.

the senju compound has mito, and nawaki, and depending on what your hcs are, would have tsunades parents, and I'd think they'd still effectively live like royalties even if the first and second are dead. (hashirama and tobirama wouldn't be around anymore by the time the three became genin I think, because (and someone correct me if I'm wrong) hiruzen would've already been hokage when he took on the three of them as his students, meaning tobirama would have already passed)

jiraiya and orochimaru just being at awe at the way tsunade lives and just how lively her house is and tsunade is just happy to have kids her age at home with her that just gets her cause her parents always nag her about training and chores, mito still treats her like a baby even though she's already a Shinobi that can take care of herself damn it!, and nawaki is so young he's so boring and sometimes gets annoying. so she always convinces her fellow teammates to come over to her house to practice and train, to babysit nawaki with her, to be the test dummy for try out this new jutsu or technique she's learning, and anything else that she insists she cannot do alone and needs them to be there with her

until suddenly it's already dark and oh her teammates can't possibly walk home all alone at this hour and besides my mum's making dinner and it's your favourite jiraiya and she'd scold me if I didn't offer some to you guys and orochimaru, mito found some sort of old scroll that uncle tobirama wrote about a new jutsu that she wants your thoughts on and besides, we have to meet sensei soooo early tomorrow for our mission and the training ground is closer from my house anyway, and you guys are just trying to get out of the bet we made and that's cheating y'know! and and and suddenly the senju compound just so happen to always have a few sets extra clothes and pyjamas that just so happened to be orochimaru and jiraiya's size and hey oro, raiya, look! it's got toads and snakes! and it matches mine! and the adults always just so happen to have two extra plates set at the table during meals, and the house just so happens to always be stocked up with both her teammate's favourite snacks, and orochimaru and jiraiya can suddenly enter the senju compound at any time of the day, with or without tsunade, and are greeted joyfully by the household's residents who had started nagging at them about training and chores and picking up after themselves, and mito is treating them like babies even though they're fully trained shinobis! and nawaki is being sooo annoying today and damn it, why isn't tsunade home yet? we agreed to train at 3!

(the three of them never quite notice that jiraiya or orochimaru's unannounced visits to the senju compound never trigger any of the seals that are activated by the presence of non-senju, non-family chakra in the compound. they never quite notice that the anbu guards at the front never give jiraiya and orochimaru any of the trouble or scrutiny that any visitors or guests to the senju compound are always subjected to, and the guards merely let them in with a slight bow of their heads, the same way they would to tsunade, or mito, or her parents.)

the only other times the sleepover isn't at tsunade's place is when there's a thunderstorm and orochimaru insists he needs to spend the night at his apartment because he tells them that last time the storm was this bad, lightning had struck a branch that smashed through his apartment that, if he wasn't already there and was even a little slower, would have destroyed the very few things his parents had left him that he so carefully keeps in a chest and he cannot ever take the risk that that would ever happen again he lost his power and his food went bad in his fridge, and c'mon tsu, you know oro not-so-secretly has a fear of thunder! don't you remember what happened last time at that mission where we were camping? we can't possibly let him spend the night alone at his house!

(later on when they're older, they'll come to find that jiraiya's new jonin apartment will become the new designated sleepover venue as jiraiya begins bringing back questionable sake from his missions that they were definitely too young to be having that he could not have possibly obtained that legally, and mito started banning them from playing card games at the senju compound when she noticed her granddaughter's tendency to lose her entire pay packet in a single game was becoming a bit too familiar to her... like a certain husband of hers' gambling habits that she had tried so hard to make sure wouldn't get passed on to the grandchild who the man had unwittingly taught said card games to at the age of 4. jiraiya started to call his apartment the degenerates' club then, much to the other two's dismay. though they couldn't quite protest when he correctly pointed out they were absolutely behaving like degenerates, even if princess tsunade and the leaf's once-in-a-generation prodigy felt like they were above those sort of disreputable behaviour.)

jiraiya and orochimaru fight tooth and nail that the massive forest that makes up the backyard of the compound, created by the shodaime himself of course, is the only reason they choose to hang out with tsunade at the senju compound, because princess tsunade (dammit oro stop calling me that!), the shodaime hokage seemed to have left so many fascinating things in this forest, there's so many secrets to discover. I don't think I've seen any of these species anywhere else in Konoha. I believe the secrets to some of his jutsu or techniques lie in this forest... oro you're such a nerd. and besides, Princess, the snakes here really seem to like oro for some reason and I think the toads are about to make me their king, I'm sure of it! and also, me and oro are the only people who don't find the fact you use the slime from those slugs in your potions or whatever absolutely disgusting, so we're the only friends you have to play in this gigantic forest with in the first place (it's not potions, it's a new medicinal gel I'm creating! and can you two just shut up? hide and seek is supposed to be a SILENT game and right now, you both really suck at it! I can literally locate you without even moving!) ...hey tsu, is mito-sama going to make those cookies she made last time again? she told me yesterday she would cause hiruzen-sensei told her we did a good job on our last mission.

the three of them knew everyone in Konoha had started calling them the 'Hokage's brats' behind their backs. but none of them realised that, particularly among the elders, this didn't seem to just be in reference to their sensei... there were other, more hushed whispers going around that if they had tried to listen to, would've sounded something like the adopted senjus... or lord first and second's legacies...

(these rumours may or may not have started when people started noticing tsunade's parents went from talking about their two children they adored, to their three rascals plus sweet little nawaki. or when mito kept comparing jiraiya's antics and personality to hashirama or orochimaru's brooding nature and hunger for knowledge was like tobirama's, or how tsunade's own hot temper and tenacity but also mischief was like her own's and the many Uzumakis that came before her, and that all three of them together balanced each other the way she, hashirama, and tobirama had. or when hiruzen constantly raves about his students and how much he sees his senseis in each of them and how the will of fire burns so brightly in them that he knew lord first and second would be extremely proud to see. in the end, though tsunade may have been the only one who shared a name with the senju founders, everybody couldn't help but see hashirama and tobirama and everything they had been and everything they had stood for in all three of the legendary sannin.)

#why yes i AM supposed to be doing my assignment right now #thank you anon for the ask and my apologies for taking your idea and absolutely RUNNING with it to the hills #as you can see i have a lot of thoughts when it comes to the baby sannin #with everything we know about the senjus (so not much) and all their stuff about the will of fire and the village being their family #there is absolutely NO WAY that they see tsunade's beloved teammates that she wont shut up about and see that theyre both orphans #that are in need of a little bit of love and family #and not immediately decided to adopt the two of them whether they like it or not #i absolutely believe that soon after they became a team the senjus started considering jiraiya and orochimaru as family #without even a shred of doubt in their mind #for as far it matters to them oro and jiraiya were one of them and were family no matter what #cause thats the kind of teachings that hashirama would've passed down #and cmon orochimaru had to learn tobiramas techniques somehow #i doubt these techniques were public knowledge #and jiraiyas proximity to the senjus could also be how minato learnt tobiramas technique too #but these hc just make what happened after the second war with the three of them so much more tragic #anyway anon i take your childhood friends sannin idea and raise it with inseperable unbreakable found family bond sannin #they mean everything to me #sannin #nart #meta #hc #tsunade #jiraiya #orochimaru #senju clan #mito #the legendary sannin #tsunade senju #naruto #naruto meta

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mcybree · 4 months

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Today i am in a wee bit of pain. If i watched skizzs 3l pov today and made weird bad takes about him on tumblr dot com would yall forgive me

#i havent watched skizzs 3l perspective because letting me blorboify skizz is a bad idea like in general #but #girls can only think about skizz telling bigb that he’ll only kill people who deserve it for so long before they need to—#bite him and tear him apart violently for information #he said thaf and then killed JIMMY. and CLEO. WHAT HAPPENED BROOOO #like thats so. teehee. toohoo #where did things go wrong for you pal #he’s a case study to me. He’s a commentary on society somehow. trust me (DONT)#this applies to ll!skizz too by the way but that’s a whole other thing i fucking love you team best #(thinks about skizz) what does community even mean to us dawg. Like as humans #bree barks so fucking loud #im nervous about my skizz muts man I love my skizz muts. Please ignore me using your blorbo for my nefarious purposes #i just have thoughts. quite a few. tired of not sharing them and pretending im normal about skizz i need to start biting

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imthursdaysyme · 10 months

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Steve and Jon tired af bc Steve thought it would be a good idea to climb through Jons window drunk at 3am instead of using the house key

#stranger things #steve harrington #drawing #art #digital art #jonathan byers #imagine Joyce finding them on the couch sleeping at like 6am #Jon's legs are wrapped across the back of the couch and Steve is somehow over the arm #snoring #Joyce gets them a blanket and pats their heads #just I love them having a brother relationship #Steve coming to the byers way too much #not wanting to be alone #and Joyce gives him a key #when Steve isn't there for dinner will ks like where tf is he #he needs to get his ass over here how am I supposed to live like this #just both will and Jon loving and treating Steve as a brother and Joyce treating him like her son #Jon and Steve keep getting into illegal crazy shit somehow #if it was Jon and Steve in season one and they found the portal Nancy crawls through Jon would look through and start backing out #and Steve would kick his ass all the way through and follow him and Jon is screaming like bro I checked and it was a no go why'd you #PUSH ME BACK IN #and Steve is like I dunno I wanted to see too but didn't wanna see like alone and then Jon and Steve are running from the demogorgon #Thier distraction techniques are akin to pumba and timon from lion king #they make it out alive and instantly start yelling at each other when they get out #the boys race to tell Joyce first cause goddamnit they wanna be the ones not in as much trouble

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kaidanalenkosprmanager · 2 months

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THE BEST OF THE NORMANDY SUMMIT

Featuring: Cmdr. Sophie Shepard, Primarch Adrien Victus, Dalatrass Linron, and Urdnot Wrex With: Comm. Specialist Samantha Traynor Commander, you need to keep Cerberus at bay- I can't overstate what a victory a treaty between the Turians and the Krogan would be for the Alliance. We need all the help we can get... Mass Effect 3: Legendary Edition (2021)

#mira makes gifs ✨#sophie shepard #urdnot wrex #samantha traynor #mass effect #mass effect 3 #me3 #mass effect legendary edition #dailygaming #finally got around to gif'ing the sur'kesh footage and i ended up splitting it in half bc the summit just had too many good wrex moments #by best of: the normandy summit i really just mean best of: wrex bc this is literally just every wrex moment from the summit LMAO #i was gonna stuff this in with the priority sur'kesh set but literally when i had like 10 gifs of just the summit i was like #sur'kesh is getting the mars split bc wrex has too many good moments to just start cutting half of them out tbh #also victus in his fancy primarch robes with THAT VOICE??? i'm not down bad for most turians but DAMN victus #maybe we talk about how fucking real he was for hearing wrex say that the krogan were the ones who spilled their blood to stop the rachni #and immediately looked at the dalatrass and said that wrex was fucking right #and then said that the dalatrass was helping wrex or she'd never see another friendly turian again?? like he's a fucking ICON for that tbh #and soph in the dress blues????? HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT (mass effect women in uniforms and armor 😍)#her angy face coming back at the dalatrass to defend wrex is everything to me #and wrex's expressions during the summit are so fucking good #there's so much raw emotion on his face that you can see and you can tell how like angry and frustrated he is with the dalatrass and victus #and how much he's holding back!! especially when linron insults him!! when she basically calls his people useless!!#like there's just a thousand+ years of pent up krogan rage about the genophage just boiling behind wrex's eyes #and he somehow manages to keep somewhat cool during the summit? like obvi wrex isn't a thousand+ years old but he's his people's rep #he's such a fucking interesting character especially during this scene when you think about a thousand+ years of the genophage #bc you get to watch him balance keeping his cool in a political situation he's a leader in #vs. remembering he's a krogan in the presence of the leadership of the people who literally created a sterility plague for his people??#and the raw emotions of that for him???#wrex my love you deserve the world for dealing with the summit in the cool-headed way that you did bc it was 100% bullshit for you #canon soph would have thrown the dalatrass off the normandy so fucking fast for insulting wrex and his people and you cannot change my mind

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icewindandboringhorror · 2 months

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More misc. daily life pictures and such

#image commentary in tags once again since they don't allow captions anymore and I feel weird using the alt text for that --#1 & 2 - Very bright pretty looking sky !#2. HUGE icicle that looked like you could kill someone with it or something.. Pulled from near a gutter on the side of a building #3. & 4 & 5 - various images from a silly party I had where I pretended to be some elf king turning like 204 years old lol (also not like #a REAL party. Only my roommates were there really and we're all in the same household bubble.#just to clarify. I would never dare have a large party anyway given #my hermitous nature but on top of that.. didn't want there to be some implication that I'm having a Party while covid is still ongoing lol.#NEVER.. But I do love dressing up as some fantasy character so much.. The only thing that could ever bring a true hermit wizard #to engage with others socially is the prospect of connecting it somehow to fantasy worlds and costumes lol. One must simply dress up #as a silly 200 year old man from time to time and pretend you've never seen a balloon before in your life. etc.#6. bapy boye... feets #7. The main food that I made for the elderly elf man 'party'. which was a Deconstructed Beef Wellington (kind of as ajoke since I watch s #o many silly cooking competition shows and they always make stuff 'deconstructed' at the last minute when under time limits or whatever.)#I've wanted to make beef wellington a few times but Ithink to do it well I'd need like..an actual kitchen and a lot of time and #an oven that fully works to bake things and etc. etc. So I thought this would be an easier method. A thick steak cut round to kind of mimi #c the round tenderloin or whatever it is in a wellington. instead of the puff pastry being wrapped around - I just did star shaped cut outs #of pastry and baked them and put them on top (to go with the star theme). instead of mushroom duxelles being wrapped around in pastry #its in a little circle under the steak. and instead of mustard being brushed onto the meat I made a mustard gravy sauce type of thing #Then of course asparagus on the side.. my favorite... Though I know some wellington #also has a layer of prosciutto I think. or I saw one person use crepes. I didn't feel it was necessary to incorporate that too lol #8. bapy son helping me do a giant puzzle that took me hours and I had no idea it was actually that large of a puzzle #until I started putting it together and for some reason it made me stressed by the end instead of relaxed lol.. puzzle fatigue #photo diary

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moeblob · 1 year

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I named the plot "guess I'll marry the demon lord?" and I realized if I wanted a lengthier title it could be "I could conquer the world if I had ADHD medicine but I don't so I became a trophy husband instead". And then as I'm giving him various background traits I realized one little piece of information would make everything make sense. He's from Florida.

#my characters #i love reynold so much and he is so wonderful and he somehow manages to win the demon lords heart in a week #and the biggest problem the demon lord even has with him is that his outer appearance does not match his core #and it gives him a headache from the echo so hes like #are you cursed to be in that body cause i can revert you if you want...?#and hes like oh yeah sure thatd be great #and then they get engaged #and reynold is like .... completely enamored with his life and his husband in this weird world #listen i have so many emotions over reynold and sascha ok they are so good for each other #the demon lord acts as the florida mans impulse control and it just works somehow #also reynold wants to adopt the entire demon army and starts to refer to them as their children #anyway long day at work today and i gotta work tomorrow for a tiny bit and so i cant do fanart tonight #since i kinda .... took too long with this oops sorry

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paperclipninja · 9 months

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When I tell you that nothing brings me delight in a show quite like a recurring gag, Crowley's duck references are up there as an absolutely fave

And the general duck-related pondering just gets me

It's not only the absolute joy that the randomness of it being ducks brings, it's the way it's part of a delayed thought process

That throughout whatever conversations Crowley's been engaged in, their brain has been mulling and searching for the epiphany that eventually comes and it's completely out of context for whoever Crowley's talking to

And while not strictly Crowley, gotta admit this was a pretty darn delightful touch:

SO. MUCH. DELIGHT

EDIT: I've just seen that there was another duck appreciation post that is put together much more nicely here and is the source of some of the fab duck gifs

#good omens #crowley #neil gaiman #honestly I cannot express my delight and I know I've overused the word but it is THE word for it #the way ducks just pop up #when I tell you I snorted in s2e1 when he started yelling at them not to feed the ducks bread #and then remembering the peas #it's just so wholesome and somehow so darn endearing #and the hearing other ducks comment is a firm fave too #I love that we were just sort of eased in with the obvious first one #ok I'll stop now #this has been a Crowley/duck appreciation post

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helianskies · 1 month

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ugly maths.

i hate maths, right. i don't usually like numbers, and if i do like numbers it's gotta be an 8 or a 48 and nothing else.

thing is, i've recently caught myself doing maths again. ugly maths. the kind of maths that, really, i've been trying to avoid as much as possible because, well, it's ugly!

you... wanna see?

okay, fine... but don't say i didn't warn you!

ugly, see? look at all those numbers! not a 48 in sight!

huh? what's that? you don't see what i'm on about? oh... oh! hang on, lemme just—

better? yes? no? no? okay, what if i—

mmh, yes. ugly numbers. see it now? can you see why they're ugly?

here, i can make it worse.

these numbers are ugly. the maths they make me do is ugly.

now i'll level with you: the worst ones by far are the yellow numbers. the maths they make me do it the ugliest.

why ugly?

because it makes me ugly.

those numbers turn me into not only a suddenly number-obsessed fool, but a fool who also cannot understand these numbers and what they mean and why i feel like they reflect on me and my ability.

87, 75.

the thoughts are as follows:

• the orange numbers are big, so why are you being ugly about the yellow ones? you should be happy with what you have. so many nice big numbers! not everyone receives that.

• is it that there are two different audiences for these two different fics? perhaps. they are quite different works, with different appeals, and different themes. maybe you are reading too much into it.

• why are you obsessing over numbers anyway? you don't like maths! you left maths behind when you were 16, put it down!

okay, okay, fine! i'll put the maths down. right here, in fact!:

that 87 was an 83 at the start of the year. the 6161 it is attached to was a 5453.

4, 708.

ugly maths.

the 75 is a nice number. in fact, compared to 87, it is beautiful, radiant, enchanting. at the start of the year, 75 was 48. wow. now that is one sexy number!

27.

mmmm.

6161, 1061.

5100.

87, 75.

12.

mmmm.

you know, my most favourite comment left recently on a fic of mine was 2 characters long: :(

it made me :)

well, actually, it made me >:) because it was left in response, presumably, to one of the key scenes in a new chapter which left the exact impression on someone that i hoped it would.

they must be the only one who reacted like that, though.

have i mentioned that that 87 and 75 include author responses?

i won't try to do more maths, there. it might not end well for me. the maths is making me tired enough as it is, and i have an early start tomorrow.

oh! but, that being said, i have another set of ugly numbers to show you, so keep 87 and 75 in mind.

ready?

838, 245.

(want a hint? the green numbers!)

838, 87. 245, 75.

9.6, 3.3.

ugly maths. it's ugly again, see? i don't like it. i'm seeing numbers within numbers within numbers, and i can't seem to stop!

the numbers make me ask new questions:

• why is it not good enough?

• people seem to engage more with one fic over the other, so shouldn't you prioritise?

• is all this maths this really good for you?

no, it isn't.

i want to avoid ugly maths. ugly maths makes me want to tear my hair out. it makes me want to start from scratch. it makes me want to grab someone and scream. it makes me want to cry and press a button that has tempted me many times before when the numbers become too ugly to bear.

ugly maths turn me into an ugly person.

ugly maths make me obsessive, paranoid, anxious, regretful, vindictive, spiteful, alone.

i hate maths. i hate numbers, just like, it feels, the numbers hate me.

#helia rants #cw vent #i'm okay but i'm not #this has been playing on my mind over the last couple of weeks #it's aimed at the sky rather than anyone here #i know i'm not the best myself as commenting. i justify it to myself by affirming i don't read much. which i don't.#since the start of the year i have tried to comment on everything i have read #bearing in mind i may also dm someone rather than comment because i want to scream and ramble about their fic more personally #that being said. i know i'm not the only one who finds themselves doing ugly maths #and in turn starting to feel uglier too #i don't like looking at the numbers #i was doing well at the start of the year #but as i open my drafts and look to a new chapter and at the notes i wrote #i can't stop myself from opening the fic. from seeing where it's at. from seeing if it's changed. from checking my inbox to see if...#if only...#what it's meant is that i've come to a point where a fic i loved has become exactly that: a fic i loved. past tense #the other fic is still a fic i love. but i know deep down that that is tied to the numbers too #i hate that this is what i've become #because i have tiny fics. fics with 50 hits and maybe 1 comment. and i love them. i still love them #but when it comes to the big ones. the multi-chapters. the hefty fics. after a point all i see are numbers #and those numbers have come to determine both my happiness and fulfilment as a writer #and so i am ugly. i am sad. i am pathetic.#and i don't know how to stop.#helia's stuff #this was meant to save back into my drafts. i was editing tags. tumblr decided it should post. so... so be it.#also this is not an attention thing if anyone dares go 'oh but you're a good writer uwu' i might do something we'll all regret #this is also not a 'ffs comment on my fics will you 😒' hell no #it's just about me. and my issue. and my unhealthy relationship with these fucking numbers.#gotta get this shit out of my head somehow :)

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charlottedabookworm · 2 months

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In a world where Mat, Art and Nyx Regisson coexist, they like to meet up and bitch about being related to royalty.

yasssssssss

they have a group chat and a standing coffee date when all three of them are in the city at the same time they spend half their time bitching about the royals they're related to and art was a witness at the nyx/mat elopement/wedding

#i'm thinking that mat met art first when he was in the group home #mat ends up basically living with art and his mum and then when he starts getting along with nyx he introduces them #so they're already friends before somehow it comes out that one of them is bastard royalty #and legti the other two are just like 'wait you too?!?!'#it becomes their biggest in joke and they love it (even as they regret being related to royalty)#ask #raven-6-20 #NF bastard placeholder tag #regisson au #ffxv #legend of the sword

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lesbeid0u · 2 months

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#Methinks I may be cupioromantic #I was talking to my friend after we got back from aniboston and somehow the topic of conversation changed to our orientations #And I was explaing to them how I don't think I've ever actually like. Loved someone romantically/been capable of loving someone romanticall #But I still wanna be in a relationship and they were like #'King I think u may be on the ace spectrum'#And then I fell victim to the 4am Thoughts and started doing some reflecting/research and damn #Wouldn't You Fucking Know It #Hoenstly tho it feels so fucking freeing knowing that there's a name for how I feel #Bc I thought I was like. Broken or some shit for the longest time bc no matter how much I tried #I could never manage to force myself into having feelings for someone irl #And idk maybe I'm not actually ace/on the ace spectrum and I'm just falling victim to the 'you haven't found the right person' mentality #But like I genuinely do not/could not see myself falling in love with someone yet I do still want to feel loved romantically #Anyway #These are 4am thoughts at 5pm so I'm not gonna dwell on them too much #If you've made it this far in the tags and have any words of advice about this shit lmk #Thanks for reading. And now it's time for the breaking news #My mom has beef with one of the stray cats in out backyard bc she thinks he's a bad influence on his children #Also one of his kids looks Just Like Grim Twistedwonderland and I'm getting making that his Halloween costume this year hehe

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unladielike · 3 days

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Every once in a while, I'd remember @spiritpyro's Hayate mentioning in his internal monologue that he likes everything about Vivian, including even her personality and her speech patterns, which to this day, makes me emotional, because as a character, Vivian has gone through a lot... from characters getting pissed off at her for saying the wrong thing (thereby ending a thread prematurely) to characters outright not getting her humour and claiming she's unkind, even though it hadn't been her intention to offend them.

Granted, I don't really treat those as canon occurrences, because I'm not really a single verse blog, so any interactions from partners who have broken mutuals with me/deactivated/didn't follow me on my remade blog are null and void (meaning as far as Vivian is concerned, they have never occurred and will no longer be referenced in any threads/headcanon posts except for this one), but at the same time, I will lay in bed at night sometimes... and have this startling revelation that the way Vivian had been treated remarkably mirrors the experiences of most autistic people I've read about/heard from. Honestly, it's astounding to me how many on Reddit would describe similar struggles/feelings she also has, to the point where even though the RPC has a general distaste for slice-of-life muses, I still take comfort in the fact she is at least relatable.

Like, yeah, I might not be the most descriptive/poetic writer on this godforsaken site, but in my opinion, my characterization is where my writing truly shines best... and so, Hayate catching feelings for Vivian (despite me portraying both her flawed and endearing sides as a young, neurodivergent woman in her early twenties) is such a memorable thing to me, that I would find myself occasionally thinking about it even while I'm at work. I mean, granted, Vivian is nowhere near as dysfunctional as the main female lead from Asper Kanojo (That's My Atypical Girl), but it cannot be denied she is still very hard to love... to the point where Hayate pretty much fell out of love with her in an alternate universe.

Either way, it honestly hurt me on a deep, visceral level when Hayate was like, 'Fucking think before you speak', when they fought that one time, because autistic people will commonly be told that at some point in their lives... furthermore, Vivian had to hear that from someone she loves, so I can only imagine how betrayed she must have felt, especially since she already tries super hard when it comes to explaining things from her point of view and can only process her thoughts when speaking them due in part to her disability.

At the same time, though, it also makes me think that in the event Vivian and Hayate would romantically be together, this would realistically be a reoccurring issue within their relationship, where every time they would argue, she'd utter out stuff that would potentially annoy him, because according to Hayate, Vivian probably doesn't put a lot of thought into her words... so there would be instances where she would view him as an absolute alien. Still, knowing Vivian, I could also see the aftermath of their fights being one of those rare, few moments where she would wish she was more normal; after all, if she happened to be less difficult, Hayate might actually become less frustrated with her.

Since this is Hayate we're talking about, however, I could also see him potentially researching autism a bit more and slowly reaching a point where he would better understand Vivian, but either way, their relationship is one I always have fun, psycho-analyzing, because it's between an unpredictable, misanthrophic man and a manic, neurodivergent woman.

#║▌ ⧼ ⸢ ʚɞ ⸣︳h̲e̲a̲d̲c̲a̲n̲o̲n̲s̲. ⧽ ― LET’S PRETEND I AM A FICTIONAL CHARACTER.#⸾ ❖︎ ⸾ ( ABOUT ) ⤹ •• 𝕧𝕚𝕧𝕚𝕒𝕟 𝕚𝕤𝕞𝕤.#⸾ ❖︎ ⸾ ( QUEUED ) ⤹ •• 𝕗𝕠𝕣 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕝𝕚𝕓𝕣𝕒𝕣𝕪.#[ you should all read asper kanojo tbh because not only does it have amazing autistic rep it's also a beautiful love story between ]#[ two autistic individuals that is a true roller coaster of emotions from start to finish ]#[ but yeah every time i look back on some of the interactions vivian has had ]#[ i end up realizing that even when i don't consciously try to i still somehow write her as very autistic ]#[ and it's during times like these that i'd remember a former mutual of mine criticizing me for apparently making autism my whole ]#[ entire personality that it would bleed through my writing and the way i talk to others ooc ]#[ but the more i think about it... the more i realize that autism is an integral part of vivian's character ]#[ that removing it or not referencing it in replies when applicable would be a major disservice to her ]#[ but it also kinda stung hearing that because i write non-autistic characters too and knowing i potentially ruined them or accidentally ]#[ made them autistic-coded did admittedly affect my confidence as a writer ]#[ however i would rarely seek out validation from my mutuals on my dash (even though i do secretly crave it) ]#[ because i'm aware many people consider that to be a major pet peeve ]

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