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wmucody · 2 months

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WE CAN'T BE FRIENDS, WE CAN'T BE LOVERS → CODY & FRANNIE PARA.

TITLE: We can't be friends, we can't be lovers. DATE: Monday 26th February. PEOPLE: Cody {@wmucody} & Frannie {@wmufranniefabray} SUMMARY: Frannie goes to call things off with Cody, and things turn sour.

Frannie

It was raining - typically - by the time Frannie arrived at Cody’s dorm. Brief flashes of a memory were attempting to underpin every single layer of self control that she had left - glimpses of Frannie delivering the Valentine’s present, the menu, to Cody’s door. Glimpses of her giddy smile and the feeling of nervous restlessness. It wasn’t even that long ago now. Still, Frannie was not the kind of girl to back down from a difficult conversation, and she wasn’t about to start now. Her knock on his door was sharp, firm and the sound against her ears almost made her wince. This was going to be uncomfortable - she had prepared herself already - but it was only now that she was here, still in her lab coat which was half covered by her jacket, that Frannie fully realised just what she was doing. “Hi.” She immediately spoke when the door flew open, attempting to offer an this-is-absolutely-fine kind of smile. “How’s it going?”

Cody

His pen tapped to the beat Trustfall by P!NK that was playing inside Cody's head. It wasn't his normal genre of music however with working in Scandals you get the same regulars requesting the same music, and Cody's mind was normally infiltrated with the repetitive songs, no matter how hard he would fight it off. His right leg bounced as a means of concentration, the synthetic material causing a sound of friction against his small desk leg. He had been sitting staring at his laptop screen for the past 90 minutes. A total word count of 2. His name. He was tasked by his professor to write a 15-page study on how environmental influences play a major part in developmental issues within young adults. Within the report he had to write about influences such as religion, family, and primary socialisation. His beaten notebook filled page to page with extensive research and notes he had collated, sometimes using people close to him to help gain a better understanding to human development.

The sharp knock at the door took Cody by surprise. His startle response was easily activated so his head turned within a millisecond with caution. He wasn't expecting anyone to come round. Maybe it was one of Frida's or Ryder's friends looking for them. He dropped his pen and walked to the door curiously. Opening the door, and seeing Frannie standing there unexpectedly, his eyebrows raised in surprise as a small smile took to his face.

"Frannie, hi," Cody greeted her. "Everything alright?"

Frannie

Upon seeing Cody's smile, Frannie tried to swallow the second - or third or forth or fifth - wave of guilt that washed throughout her body. There was always the possibility that this conversation potentially could go well, but Frannie wasn't naive. She was dreading it. Every muscle of her body wanted to make a quick, brief excuse. Lie and leave. Run away. Yet her feet firmly remained planted - or frozen - in place. Honesty was the only way of resolving this situation, this square, without anyone getting properly hurt. Ignoring Cody's question, her eyes darted behind his body, trying to discern whether Cody was alone or not. "Are you busy?" She resulted in asking, turning her attention and gaze back to the man in front of her. "I was wondering whether we could talk?"

Cody

Cody picked up that there was something not right with Frannie. Her body language was different this time around. His guess was that it was a result of the Muckracker column that had came out. He forced a laugh every time someone asked about it, shaking it off like he didn't care, but to be talked about in a university-wide column with his kinda-ex, his good friend, and a potential love interest? It did throw a spanner in the works for him. He didn't know exactly how he felt about the column and he wasn't rushing to find out. Instead his attention was directed to everything else that could distract him.

"Yeah, come in," he replied, stepping to the side to allow Frannie enter the room. Running his fingers through his hair nervously, a mixed feeling of anxiety and curiosity flooded his gut. "What's got you all.. weird?"

Frannie

Even stepping past Cody, their bodies momentarily brushing past one another, Frannie couldn't help the sharp inhale of breath that left her lips. She was on edge. Part of her wanted to soak and relish in the brief glimmer of moments of Cody and Frannie being together like they were right now before she broke it. It was tempting to pretend that nothing outside of this room was happening, that everything between the two of them was remaining as rosy and red at the weekend had been. Colours had always been Cody's thing, something he had encouraged Frannie to consider more in depth. If the weekend had been a rosy red, then today was a darker blue. A navy. Maybe recency bias of the current pouring rain hammering in the background had influenced her colour choice, or maybe the shade reflected the melacholic feeling humming in her gut.

This was the first time she had ever been inside Cody's dorm, but she didn't allow herself a second of looking around. No. Focus. Each thought that flashed through her mind felt drastic, cruel; so instead of listening to those thoughts, Frannie spun round to face Cody and opted for brutal honesty. It was the only way she knew how to best address this. "I'm fine." She replied shortly, rushed, the last thing she wanted to focus on right now was her and her feelings. "How are you?"

Cody

Cody closed the door as he nibbled on his bottom lip. He had learned to determine the mood of a conversation through tone of voice, shortness of sentences, the way someone breathed. His act of picking up on non-verbal communication was pristine which also was a massive indicator in how he knew that something about Frannie showing up at his door, unexpected, wasn't going to end well. "I'm also fine."

He corrected his body language from slumping to straightening up his back, his shoulders presented in a poised position. His lips pursed at the anticipation of what talk was about to take place. He had only just recovered from the weekend so to be faced with Frannie's demanour had knocked him into a state of clueless wondering.

Frannie

Trying to differentiate between herself and her parents was something Frannie had always tried to do - after all, this was how she was raised. How she knew how to exist. And yet, as she has grown older, Frannie had learned so much about how wrong some of the way she communicated was. She was still learning. "The Mukracker Column was right." She spoke openly, but a tentative softness to the tone of her voice because my God, was the guilt eating her alive. If the pale colour currently shading her cheeks was anything to go by, it was made even clearer by how she fiddled nervously with her hands.

"I'm unsure about how Mercedes, of all people, is involved but.. the part about Sam and I was true. I really like him. A lot. The kind of feelings that I really, really don't want to ignore, even if I've been trying hard to." It felt wrong to say. Like a guilty, sinful secret. Realistically, Frannie knew there was nothing she had done particularly wrong, perhaps except fail to tell Cody beforehand, but she couldn't hide how awful this felt to do. "What I'm trying to say is that I think it would be best if we stop - this. With us. I can't carry on getting to know you when I know that there's potential with someone else. It's not fair to you or to them or to anybody." Pausing, momentarily, Frannie chewed down on her lower lip. "I'm sorry."

Cody

"Mukracker, mm,” Cody repeated, a small laugh escaping his mouth. Of course. The nod of his head suggested that his part to play in the love square was also true. He noticed Frannie fiddling with her hands. His urge to close the gap between them fought strongly against his resilience. He wanted to make sure she was okay, that this was still a safe space regardless of the context of the conversation. No. His inner voice commanded. The coldness of the voice inside his head sent electrical shocks through his body. Cody immediately positioned his hand behind his back, his hands place strategically in a way to comfortably rotate his ring as a way of keeping his thoughts on track.

“You don’t need to be sorry,” he replied, his teeth slightly gritted. His jaw tensed as he took a second to process what Frannie had just admitted. As Cody tried to make sense of the situation, his eyes narrowed as he kept eye contact. The reactiveness clashed with the voice of reason within his head, as if his patience was a strong standing cliff with the waves of defensiveness relentlessly trying to crack the foundations of his calm front.

“I do have one question though”. Cody stepped towards Frannie, cocking his head to examine her body language. To try figure out what she was really thinking. “What is making you want to prioritise your potential with Sam over what we have? And I’m in no way slandering Sam, he’s one of my good friends here, and he’s definitely the safest option. But why?” He questioned. “Especially when we’ve just came back after spending the weekend at your house, of all places, with your family, of all people. What was it all for?”

Frannie

Several questions fought their way into her mind as she watched Cody nod in confirmation. Confirmation of what, he hadn’t clarified, but Frannie was not in a position right now to be asking questions or throwing any kind of accusations. The change, the shift, the drastic difference now in the heavy atmosphere between them in comparison to the weekend was palpable and Frannie fought against the urge to look away. No.

“I do need to be sorry.” Frannie replied quietly, watching carefully as Cody stepped closer to her, releasing another shaky breath. “You deserve so much more than being put in a situation like this.” His eyes were scanning her own and it felt as though she was being examined. The sheer intensity of the now closeness between the two of them, combined with his piercing gaze on her, sent a shiver down her spine.

The question caught Frannie off-guard. It was honest. Painfully so. A kind of honesty that Frannie hadn’t been expecting. There had been a slight assumption on her part that Cody wouldn’t care. A silence fell between the two of them. “What makes you think that’s the safer option?” She finally asked, swallowing the lump that had started to form in her throat. A question for a question. There were so many thoughts racing through her head, many of which were being promptly ignored. “Ultimately, the feelings that I have for Sam are stronger. They’re different.” She replied, removing her gaze from Cody momentarily to anywhere else in the room, her eyes landing on his laptop, still alight, on his desk. “I-I’m not saying that the two of us couldn’t have had those kind of feelings eventually. I think we could have, perhaps, if the circumstances were different.” She admitted, moving her eyes back to Cody again. “But that’s not how this worked out. I can’t give myself fully to you when my heart is elsewhere.” The ever so familiar saying right person, wrong time echoed in her head and she squeezed her eyes shut, briefly, blocking it out.

Cody

Cody couldn’t help but scoff at Frannie’s response, at how he apparently deserved so much more. His want of being understanding about the situation was overpowered now as his annoyance began to creep in. She thought he deserved so much more but she was the one that put him in this position in the first place? He wasn’t getting the logic behind her words, and the wall he felt brick around his heart wouldn’t allow him to see it even if the logic was there.

“Safer in the sense that you don’t think you can quite put your finger on me, and that scares you. Maybe Sam is the type of guy who you can understand easily, and the lack of risk with him makes it easier. Like a cop out,” Cody stated, his voice lower and calm. The reason behind his answer came from the few times that they had spent together, where Frannie had sparked questions about the depths of him. As Frannie looked away Cody maintained his eye contact, asserting some sort of dominance within the conversation. Keep neutral. His father’s voice echoed the walls of his head. Vulnerability was taught as a weakness growing up in his house. There was no room for emotion in his childhood, and if he even showed a slight reaction it was never greeted with sympathy but rather outrage. The trauma of this carried into his adulthood days, especially in moments of conflict.

“I think if your heart was truly elsewhere, like you say it is, your breath wouldn’t be shaky. Shaky breath is normally triggered by stress, or anxiety, and if you are so, so sure of your choice wouldn’t you be more self-assured about it and act as such?” He knew his question was rather out there, a trick, if anything, to see if there was any possibility that Frannie was at all doubtful about cutting their connection off.

Frannie

Her head snapped back to face Cody in an instant, the minute the words a cop out fell from Cody’s lips into the room between them. The words hung in the air and replayed in Frannie’s mind, over and over. “Stop it.” She answered, sharply, her eyes now locked on his. This felt like an entirely different person and it had temporarily thrown her off. While Frannie had been fighting to show vulnerability, against everything she had been taught, Cody’s eyes were calm. Cool. Chilled. It didn’t make any sense, and yet, she recognised it in an instant. No emotions. This was how she had been raised. What her parents had drilled into her. And now, for perhaps the first time, she was seeing this kind of response given to her. She was on the receiving end of it, for once.

“I’m not a psychology experiment, Cody. You don’t need to start pyscho-analysing me.” Her words were now less gentle, less soft, and filled with an impatience that hadn’t been there previously. This was a side of herself that Frannie hadn’t welcomed willingly in a long time. Her voice was now remaining cool and chilled, echoing Cody’s own, while she tilted her head to the side, eyebrows raised. “A shaky breath can indicate many things, yes. Anxiety or stress, absolutely. But have you ever had to have this kind of conversation, before? Delivering news like this isn’t fun. Or easy. Regardless of how sure I am, I’m not enjoying this in the slightest.”

It took everything in Frannie’s body and self control to hold back. To bring back a softer tone to her voice. To reach out and make this situation better. To even take back what she had said. And yet she couldn’t. Not now.

Cody

The tension between them drew out the unlikeable side of Cody. It had shaped people's perspectives of him, and it will probably be repeated, yet again, with Frannie. His inner child pleaded for him to show some sort of sympathy towards Frannie and the undeniably tough situation that she had dealt with rightfully. No matter how loud his inner child screamed, it was ignored. Like he had been screaming within the Amazon rainforest with no civilisation around for miles. Cody, as much as he denies it, was his father's son. The taught behaviours was the first thing on the list of what he disliked about himself, however it kept him safe even if the price he had to pay was being alone.

"Well, spare yourself the hassle of this conversation and leave," Cody retorted. He turned away from Frannie, a small moment of weakness expressed on his face as he was out of her gaze. Gathering himself together, he perched himself down on his chair. His unorganised desk filled with notes upon notes of classwork reflected his current mindset. He felt rejected, pissed off, hurt, he wanted to turn around and kiss Frannie in one last act of surrender, to plead his case that he was the right one, not someone else.

"Don't forget to shut the door," he commented harshly, biting down on his lip for his body to focus on the nipping pain rather than the emotions building up inside him.

Frannie

As soon as Cody’s back was turned, she swallowed, her gaze finally lowering to the ground in a somewhat defeat. Her eyes lingered on Cody for a few, brief seconds before she noticed her hands were shaking. Only slightly, but enough that she tucked them in her pockets. She didn’t have anything else to say - no more words. They had been swallowed and gulped down and unspoken. Perhaps later, in hours or days or weeks to come, Frannie would think of the words and regret not ushering a thousand apologies for this whole thing, but she couldn’t. Not now. Her pride was the only thing in this whole situation she seemingly had left.

Turning, momentarily, Frannie placed a small envelope on the side of a table, labelled with Cody’s name in her swirly handwriting and glitter gel pens. His comment caused Frannie to release an irritated eye roll. “I mean, I just came here to let you know. You don’t need to bite my head off or anything, jeez.”

On her way out, Frannie turned one last time to say something before she noticed on Cody’s desk a small word, imprinted on one of the scattered pages around him. Her name. A frown crossed her features, confusion setting in almost instantly. “What is that?” She asked, a dangerously suspicious edge to her tone now.

Cody

Cody pretended to ignore the envelope that Frannie had sat down. Automatically thinking it was a letter of apology, as he knew she was a fan of handwritten communication, he rolled his eyes. As if she had anything different to say that would make him feel any less amazing than he already did. His eyes fixated on a small mark on the wall. He couldn't quite tell what it was, a pen mark, a dirt mark from his skateboards, whatever it was it was doing a pretty good job at keeping Cody's gaze occupied rather than succumbing to the desire of looking at Frannie. The admiration was still there, firmly, he dreaded that it would stick around for sometime, especially now that things had ended between them.

His eyebrows raised at Frannie's question, his eyes scouring the endless pieces of paper in front of him. Some pages ripped, some white, some a darker shade from sitting out so long. Then he seen it. His A4 sheet of notes that he had jotted down upon his return of spending the weekend with her parents. During his stay he had taken mental note of the behaviours presented in front of him, many mental notes. Fuck, he thought. Although he had noted down personal things about the Fabrays, he was never going to use them, it was just a visual aid into understanding development more, it gave him more exposure to real life scenarios, but the paper was supposed to be binned as soon as Cody figured out his train of thought.

His breath hitched. A pause created more tension. It was the right thing to explain fully, to reassure Frannie that it was a simple way of understanding who she was as a person, and it was never going to be used for his personal gain. Cody, however, was never in the habit of doing the right thing. It'd be easier for Frannie to hate him. He couldn't pass her in the hallway, knowing that there was something lingering. "Tsk, I thought if I was going to understand fucked family behaviours and their impact on children then you were my perfect start".

Frannie

Oh, so they were playing that game, now? Every single muscle in her face was prepared and ready to flinch, to crumple, to fall at Cody’s comment. The stinging sensation almost vibrated across her entire body. And yet, she somehow, remained still, calm, thanking God that her shaking hands remained far away, out of view, inside of her pockets.

The note. The promise. The reassurance that every piece of information she had confidentially shared would never be used. All of it had been thrown out of the window and what was left, scattered around this bedroom, was the silent, invisible remnants of any of her respect that had been left for Cody.

If he was trying to hurt her, he could tick off mission achieved, but she would be damned if she was letting Cody ever see that. No, she instead stared at him, a small smirk beginning to form. “That’s cute.” She drawled, slowly, her eyes lowering the paper yet again. “If you’re looking for those kind of fucked behaviours, Cody, perhaps start looking more internally next time. I don’t think Sammy would appreciate you thinking of me like that anymore.” And with that comment, Frannie twisted her body, turning on her heel and walking out of the room. It was quick, not a hurry but a definite march - the only indication that she left behind of just how affected she was. As soon as her body was away. Far away. Tucked into a corner and hidden. She finally allowed the tears of regret and guilt to fall from her eyes.

#{{ paras with: frannie }}#{{ paras with: frannie 003 }}

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andmaybegayer · 1 year

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Last Monday of the Week 2022-11-28

It's almost December what the hell

Listening: I am an Actual Factual Rick Astley Fan, I have two CD's in my desk right this second, and I have had "Take me to your heart" stuck in my head for days. I get rickrolled by other Rick Astley songs, get on my level.

So very 80's. The synths. The backing chorus. The hair.

youtube

Watching: Double features, both unexpected, both courtesy of my brother.

Saw Bullet Train, 2022 Brad Pitt action movie based on the Maria Beetle hitman/revenge thriller novel. Good action comedy, what if half a dozen mercenaries were all on a bullet train all vying for the same prize for different reasons.

A few points where it shows off by delivering a detailed backstory for a new character with a rapid flashback through their history with immensely complicated action scenes shown for three seconds each seems more like a peacock-feather-esque self-handicapping flex but damn if it isn't funny.

Also went to see The Menu in theaters, which is a fantastic dark humour/horror thing with Ralph Fiennes and Anya Taylor-Joy where Fiennes is the weirdly intense head chef of an exclusive restaurant and Taylor-Joy is a dinner date brought along at the last minute who throws a spanner in his elaborate menu plan. Worth watching, beautifully shot, hilarious and manages to be unbelievably tense without ever really being scary.

Reading: among other things, flipping through the good parts of Ignition! now that I have a copy again, I gave my one away to my niece because she likes rockets and needs a better introduction to the power of chemical bonds than her teachers can muster.

As much fun as the later chapters are some of the best ones are the early ones where we were really just fucking around and seeing what happens when you put aromatic amines in a bottle with some RFNA and shake it around a bit.

Making: More sewing, trying and failing to fix up the drill press which will be fixed... soon. Something broke the wires inside our pulse oximeter so I threw some solder at that and now it works again.

Playing: Tried to get back in to Ace Combat 7, but the mission I'm stuck on is kicking my ass. I've resolved to set a limit of a dozen tries and if I can't improve by then I'll restart the campaign one level of difficulty lower. Frustrating, because I'm missing the target score by like, 8%, it's so close.

Tools and Equipment: the running backstitch! Someone on here mentioned it so I looked it up, neat thing, much faster than conventional backstitch without giving up much holding performance. For structural seams that don't really need to be *that* strong, they're a good choice. I backstitch habitually for basically everything but it is nice to have an option that's faster.

youtube

#last monday of the week #Youtube

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cockslutpadalecki · 2 years

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I Hate You, Don’t Leave Me

Summary: You’re all set to enjoy your vacation away with your friends, but they’re about to throw a spanner in the works in the form of one Bucky Barnes.

Characters: Bucky x F!Avenger!Reader.

Words: 2K.

Warnings: enemies to lovers, oh shit there’s only one bed, mentions of being physically injured, unrivalled competitiveness, angst, smangst, explicit sexual content, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it kids), 18+.

A/N: Formerly a Patreon exclusive. Beta: @princessmisery666 but all the general bullshit is entirely mine.

You sense something is off the minute you enter the hotel room behind Sam. You’re too excited at the prospect of some downtime— and away from one super soldier in particular, to notice that Sam ‘takes the longest to get ready despite the lack of hair’ Wilson has no luggage for the three day vacation. But as soon as the occupants of the small hotel room come into view, you know you’ve been duped.

You’re in full holiday mode— have been for the past week, but the minute you catch sight of Steve’s stern look as he lays down the ultimatum, and the real reason you and Bucky have been tricked here, all of that pent-up excitement morphs into frustration.

This is meant to be a vacation— a chance to let your hair down, but the entire planning of the getaway, and the break itself, is a ruse. A well formulated plan by the Captain and Sam to put an end to the rampant animosity between you and Bucky.

“You’re gonna stay here, alone, and put aside your differences,” Steve explains, tone authoritative.

“C’mon, you can’t be serious!” Bucky roars at his best friend as he paces up and down the room.

“Dead serious, Buck,” Steve replies calmly. “You two constantly fighting each other is bad for the team, look where your arguing got us in Prague.”

You and Bucky shoot each other an awkward glance across the room. Nobody ever talks about Prague.

“I am not staying here with him,” you huff, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Then it’s plan B,” Steve states firmly.

“Any plan is better than this one,” Bucky mutters.

“Okay then.” Steve’s eyes dart between you. “Either one of you steps down, which no one wants, or you work it out. Talk through your issues, find some common ground.”

“Or you could fight to the death,” Sam intercedes with a light chuckle. “I already got fifty on her.”

You flash Sam a smug grin as Bucky stares him down, jaw tight. Steve rebukes Sam lightly, putting his hand to Bucky’s chest to stop him from advancing on the third man.

“You don’t think I’d beat her?” Bucky almost snarls, nostrils flaring.

“I dunno dude, she’s got a lot of rage,” Sam shrugs in response. “She can whoop my ass, easy.”

“But you’re smart enough not to piss me off,” you add, winking at Sam.

Bucky snaps his head to glare at you. “C’mon then Princess, you think you can take me, show me what you got,” he snarks.

“Please,” you roll your eyes, “I could take you out with my pinky.”

“Stop,” Steve snaps, “this is exactly what I’m talking about. This unhealthy competition has to end now.”

Neither of you dare to sass him back.

“Alright then,” Steve smiles at you both before he and Sam slowly begin to make their way towards the exit, “we’ll be back in the morning.”

“Wait, the morning?” you shout, trotting after them. “You don’t actually expect us to spend all night here? Together?”

Steve turns on his heel, giving Sam a small glance before looking at you. “I don’t care what you do as long as this is all resolved by tomorrow.”

“But there’s only one bed!”

“No luck?” you ask when Bucky lets out an exasperated sigh, throwing his cell onto the bed after another failed attempt to convince Steve to let you out. It’s been an hour and he’s not budged an inch.

“Nope.” He shakes his head. “Still maintains that we need to talk through our problems.”

“Great,” you mumble under your breath. “No wonder the negotiations are left to Steve.”

“Look, I’m not exactly thrilled to be stuck here with you either.”

“At least we can agree on something.”

Silence follows as the realisation dawns on you— the two of you aren’t going to get out of this without a little compromise.

With a defeated huff, Bucky perches on the edge of the bed, elbows leant on knees as he stares down at the floor, mind elsewhere.

You sit opposite him in the only other sitting apparatus in the room, the hard plastic, uncomfortable chair positioned in front of the ornate mirror.

Your shoulder starts to ache from the weight of your overnight bag, internally berating yourself for packing so much for such a short trip. In normal circumstances, the pain wouldn’t faze you, but ever since you sustained an injury, it’s not been the same. The area is healed, but underneath the surface— the ache in the joint, and the small patch of numbness in your middle finger where the nerve is damaged is what bothers you. Times like these, where you find yourself tense and stressed out, tend to make it hurt more.

You lift your hand to the sore area, fingers slipping under the strap of your dress, and rub tenderly at the blemished scar as you let out a small sigh.

“You alright?” Bucky asks through the silence, eyes cast towards your shoulder.

“Yeah,” you wince, catching a nerve, “just the perks of the job, I guess.”

“Where’d you get it?”

“Why are you so interested in my war wounds all of a sudden?” you snap, pulling the strap of your dress back into place.

“Just trying to get to know you like Steve wants.”

“Oh,” you say, looking awkwardly at the floor, “Sokovia. Piece of flying rebar.”

Bucky shimmies his arm out of his t-shirt and tugs the material up under his armpit, giving you a perfect view of well toned abs. You swallow deeply, feeling heat rush into your cheeks. He may well be an ass, but you’d have to be blind to not appreciate the looks God gave him.

“Dagger, Berlin.”

You stare at the silvery wound, your fingers dancing in your lap as you wish you could reach out and touch it— feel the puckered skin under yours.

Grimacing, you scold yourself internally before tugging your sundress up and over your knee, showing off the large round scar on your inner thigh. You run your thumb over the marred flesh, and as you look down at it, you think you catch Bucky stiffening at the sight of your skin on display.

“Argentina,” you begin as Bucky nods, remembering the mission. “Clint’s arrow ricocheted off Steve’s shield trying to take down a perp, caught me in the process.”

Bucky rolls his eyes, unimpressed. “Ah, that’s nothing compared to this.” He turns around, showing off a wide scar on his back, one he explains he got back in ‘45.

It becomes a tug of war as you try to outdo one another on healed wounds. Clothes are forgotten as more flesh is exposed, forgetting your company in your bid to beat each other.

You think you’ve won with your eight inch scar running up between the valley of your breasts from a broken chitauri blade, but when Bucky pulls his top off completely, and his fingers graze the red welts leading to his metal arm, you let out a loud huff.

“Prosthetics don’t count,” you grumble.

Bucky tsks, rolling his eyes. “Okay, then how about this?”

He stands up and begins to unbuckle his belt, while you stare at his impressive body, an uncomfortable heat building in the pit of your stomach.

Bucky tugs down his pants just below his hips, giving you a small glimpse of the shadowy patch of hair, before revealing a large scar on his right side. “Got this in…”

Your eyes widen at the sight of the ageing bullet wound, but the memory is still fresh as if it happened an hour ago.

“What the hell are you doing?” Bucky screamed at you over the sound of gunfire. “Why aren’t you at the checkpoint?”

“It’s been compromised!” you yelled back. “I had to get outta there!”

“I told you to stay put! I was coming to get you!”

You barely had time to process the bullet flying through mid air towards you, but by the time you did, Bucky was already standing between you and it. He grunted heavily as it penetrated his suit, falling to his knees in a pained heap.

“Buck!” You hear Steve roar over comms as Nat rushed to Bucky’s aid, while you remained frozen to the spot. What had he just done?

“Y/N,” Nat shouted at you, voice abnormally steady. “Y/N!” The redhead called again, finally pulling you from your shocked reverie. “Get the fuck down here and help me.”

You dropped to your knees beside Bucky, taking in every detail of Natasha’s instructions like it was a Valedictorian speech you had to memorise when in reality, it was two simple requests.

Put pressure on the wound.

Don’t let him bleed out.

“Yeah, two millimetres to the right and it would’ve punctured his femoral.” You caught Natasha informing Steve over the radio as your mouth went dry. You didn’t want Bucky to die.

All you could concentrate on was the steady heartbeat thundering in your ears, except for the hot rivulets of Bucky’s blood that stained your hands, savagely reminding you of the choices that had been made in haste.

“I don’t know!” Nat squeaked, yanking you back to the present. “He just stepped right out in front of her!”

“Prague,” you mutter softly, a lump the size of a golf ball stuck in your throat.

“Yeah,” he nods.

“Where your dumb heroics got you shot,” you snap in an attempt to cover up your ardent greed.

“Well those dumb heroics saved your ass, doll,” Bucky bites back.

“Maybe you should’ve saved yourself the trouble, at least we wouldn’t be here now.”

“Is that really what you think? That I should’ve let you die? That I don’t care what happens to you?”

“Do you?”

“D’you think I’d take a bullet for you if I didn’t?”

It feels like all the air has been sucked out of the room as you lock eyes with Bucky, piercing cobalt staring straight through your soul. Your bottom lip catches between your teeth before you’re catapulting yourself towards him. He meets you halfway, lips furiously battling yours as his tongue slips inside your mouth.

The little clothes you have left on are discarded with deft, expert fingers, and eventually when there are no more clothes to shed, those same fingers wander excitedly across naked skin. Bucky pulls you towards the bed, and sits down on the edge, urging you to stand between his spread legs as his large cock bounces against his stomach.

Bucky explores your tits, giving each nipple a gentle suck as he dips his head before staring up at you as his lips press over the scar between your breasts with alien tenderness.

“God, I hate how gorgeous you are,” he whispers, hand slipping between your thighs, and every part of you clenches at the compliment.

You let out a small gasp when his fingers slide through your pussy lips. Placing your hands on Bucky’s shoulders to steady yourself, your eyes flicker closed as his fingers explore your entrance before slowly penetrating your slick heat.

Bucky leans forward, pressing kisses to your abdomen as he works you open, smiling against your fervoured skin the louder your whimpers become.

Pulling his fingers free, he encourages you to take a step back so he can close his legs, and quickly pulls you down into his lap. You wrap a hand around his length, giving it a few slow pumps before he’s lifting you up by your hips and positions his cock at the entrance to your wet cunt.

He looks up at you as if seeking permission and you nod before slowly sinking down onto his length, your mouth falling open as you stretch around him.

“Still think you could take me with your pinky?” Bucky jokes breathlessly as your ass finally meets his hips.

You smile, eyes fluttering closed in bliss as he begins to rut inside you. “Certain of it.”

***

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#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes fanfiction #sebastian stan fanfiction #marvel fanfiction #mcu fanfiction

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gifted-burnout-archive · 4 years

Text

Who Would’ve Thought

Requested?: yes! so this is a mashup of sorts. I got three separate requests: the first being an interview scene with a bitchy reporter, the second a y/n x luke with some enemies to lovers and an argument, but the actors get on really well, and the third was for a similar teasing, y/n x luke concept. This doesn’t quite cover every part of each request, but it gets a bit of all of them in, ya know?

Word count:

Author’s Note: i think this is the point where i just accept i am a jatp smut writer, right? i mean, it was only a matter of time before it happened... i liked this, writing it was so much fun, if you like this and want more send it in to me!

Warning: this became fluffy smut, you’re very welcome.

the masterlist is here, because i have more stuff like this.

“Ok, ok.” The laughs around set subsided after Madison’s joke, the reporter sitting up a little straighter and coughing to compose himself. “I have to ask, and I have to know since that trailer dropped last week… Y/N, I think everyone watching wants to find out a bit more about you and the character you’re bringing to season two?” He asked, turning his attention from the show’s star to the young woman sat beside her, who was wiping tears from the corners of her eyes, trying to stop laughing.

“What is it you want to know?” She asked, sharing a smiling with Madi as she too sat up straight in her chair once more, running a hand through her hair and crossing one leg over the other, all triggers to help her subside the giggles waiting to erupt from her chest, to calm down and get back to the professionalism she had practiced in her bedroom mirror.

“Well, for starters, what’s it been like, joining the Julie and the Phantoms crew? Am I right in saying this is your breakout role, just like it was for Madison last season?” He asked, and Y/N nodded, gripping Madi’s hand in hers.

“Yeah, it is. And I’ll tell you something, I wouldn’t have known what to do on day one without Madi. The closest I came to acting, to television, before this was when I played a tree in my kindergarten school play.” She explained, glancing past the reporter’s shoulder to see Kenny stood watching them with a grin, sending a thumbs up her way. Her body relaxed a little. “Yeah, I auditioned as a dare from a friend at college and, well…” She smiled wider. “Seems like the best decision I’ve ever made.”

“And from what I can tell, the rest of the cast sat in on your audition?” The reporter asked, looking to both girls for an answer.

“Not the first one.” Madi cleared up. “But Kenny and the casting team loved Y/N, and wanted to make sure she was the perfect fit. They had her perform on the sound stage, and the rest of us just sort of snuck in to watch.” She explained, letting go of Y/N’s hand to gesture as she spoke. “We were all just blown away, and Charlie was the first to shout out after she finished. He called out… What did he say?” Madi asked Y/N, who was laughing to herself at the memory.

“Kenny, will you hire her already?” Y/N answered, and the reporter chuckled again. “And from that moment on, I was Grace.”

“Yes, Grace, our mysterious new rebel child. What can you tell us about her?”

“Ok, so, we’ve got Kenny on standby in case I mess up and give away too much.” Y/N prefaced. “So, Grace is the new girl at Los Feliz High, Carrie’s cousin, and coming in with a bit of reputation where we left off season one. I think the best way to describe would be a musical influencer?” She glanced to Madi, who nodded in agreement. “Bit of a rebel, bit of a spanner in the works for Juke despite her and Luke quite adamantly disliking each other.” She added, and the reporter was nodding his head feverishly.

“Yeah, the trailer seemed to show it. Is that the character’s big goal, breaking up our OTP?” He asked, and Y/N bit her lip as she thought for a moment.

“I think she’s a character with a lot of growth, you get a lot from her in the season, which I was so honoured to bring to the table. We’re doing some reshoots tomorrow, finalising one of the big scenes the trailer didn’t show. I can’t say a lot, but Grace is definitely causing some tension this season, throwing in some music of her own too.” Y/N added, quick to change the subject of discussion to something she knew she was safe to talk on.

“What was it like, working with the rest of the cast on the new season’s album?” The reporter quizzed, taking the hint. “Madi, we heard you and Y/N singing together on the trailer, saw it in one of the stills, I can only wonder how two such talented singers get into each other’s rhythm, especially with the difference in genre. Obviously, Madi you have piano, but with Y/N on guitar, I just wonder how it all worked out while filming?”

“We actually wrote the song for the trailer, along with Charlie. The three of us brainstormed the thing for the first few weeks of filming, just like Charlie and I did with Perfect Harmony last season.” Madi explained. “And you know, we all come from very different musical backgrounds, and it allowed for this amazing mixture of pop and rock and grunge that just works. You only hear a snippet of our song, but just wait until you hear the full thing.” She was beaming, and Y/N couldn’t help but smile and nod along.

“The day we recorded it, man, we were all just electric. There’s this section with the guitars…” Y/N paused. “That I won’t spoil… You can tell this is my first press junket, right?” She laughed, earning chuckles from the studio. No-one blamed her for being new, she was learning quickly enough that it wasn’t a problem.

“So, on the topic of Charlie, who is waving at us right now from behind the camera,” The reporter paused as the girls laughed and waved past the camera recording them all at their co-star. “I have to ask about Julie and Luke, and now this new dimension of Grace.” The girls nodded, a question they both had expected and prepared for. “Madi, are we getting a Juke kiss this season?”

“I really can’t spoil it. It’s not fair… But their relationship does take a few turns, it’s a really interesting subplot.” She said with ease, a rehearsed line.

“And what about Grace? What are her feelings around Juke? Jealousy, perhaps?” The reporter questioned, and Y/N glanced over his shoulder to Kenny, who nodded for her to go ahead.

“Oh, she’s definitely jealous, though it might not be the reason you initially think of.” She said with a smile, quite proud of herself for keeping the answer vague enough, a light switching on on the camera to alert of their time finishing. Y/N smiled, getting herself ready to stand up, glad she had ended the interview on a good answer, when the reporter held up a hand for her and Madi to pause.

“And I mean, that chemistry seems to be translating off-screen too, no?” The reporter pressed on forward with his questions. “I mean, the chemistry you and Charlie have off-screen, Madison, is pretty clear. Is there jealousy off screen from you Y/N?” He asked, the questions turning from family-friendly to gossipy rather quickly. The executive producers stood behind the reporter had lost their smiles, Ortega and Becker ready to march forward and end the interview themselves.

But then, Y/N burst into uncontrollable laughter as a response, Madi quickly joining in one the sole base that Y/N was a rather infectious person. Soon, the whole cast was laughing along, the reporter left in the dark as the camera shut off and the girls left the press set stage in giggles, the crew suddenly moving quickly to start packing up for the night, the reporter being led off by assistants as the girls made their way over to their waiting friends and castmates.

The interview had been Y/N’s first and the team’s last of the day, and with the next day being their final shoot day for the season, the younger cast members had decided to celebrate and go out to dinner together, a pre-celebration to the wrap party the next day.

Stood by the studio’s exit was the rest of the dinner party: Jadah, Savannah, Owen, Tori, Sacha, Jeremy, Booboo, Tori, Kyra, Sofia, Halle, and Charlie, the last of whom swung his arm over Y/N’s shoulder as she and Madi joined the group, starting out for a restaurant on the far side of the lot.

“Not bad for a rookie, sweetheart.” Charlie spoke with a teasing tone, earning an elbow to the ribs from his friend. The pair had been inseparable for the whole year, since Y/N got the role in fact, and his arm across her shoulders was such a familiar and comforting feeling, that she found herself cuddling into him as they got out onto the lot and the Vancouver wind chill hit hard. Without pause, Charlie shrugged off his jacket and sat it over Y/N’s shoulders, the pair sharing a smile.

“You know, you should invest in shirts with sleeves, Gillespie.” She muttered, rolling her eyes as he responded with a smirk, flexing his biceps as his arm settled back over her, this time Y/N’s hand coming up and their fingers interlocking as they followed the group towards the restaurant. Madi and Savannah were up front with the other Dirty Candy girls, all singing one of the new songs from the show as they skipped their way across the lot, while Jadah, Sacha, Owen, Booboo and Jeremy were in the middle of the group, seemingly discussing what they were getting for dinner, confirmed when Owen started to rave about one of the desserts the restaurant had rather loudly.

Y/N watched the scene with a smile, watched all her friends with a smile. She knew she was lucky, she reminded herself of it every day she spent with the group of amazing people she had come to call her family. The move to Vancouver for filming was a huge shift, and she had initially thought she’d be alone and homesick, spending all her free time at her rented flat reading out scripts to her walls, but it hadn’t been the case. The cast had adopted her like she had been there since day one, they made her feel welcome and at home in the foreign city, Charlie especially. He was the one who got her out of her shell, who made sure to invite her to every dinner and party and hangout in the first few weeks of filming. He was the one who played guitar with her, who came and stayed with her for a week when she was unwell and stuck inside her little flat.

He was the one who was watching her at that moment in time, a dopey smile on his face as he pulled her closer into his side, pressing a kiss to the side of her head as they followed their friends round a corner, their destination that night coming into view, along with some extra familiar faces.

“Gotta be careful, Y/N, Charlie has a habit of passing on his fleas.” The teasing came from Charlie’s sister Meg, who slipped through the small crowd to hug her brother and his best friend hello.

“Don’t worry, I’ve been getting him treated.” Y/N responded with a grin, the pair sharing a tight hug before Meg moved on to squeeze her brother in hello, both girls smiling at his surprised expression.

“I didn’t know you were coming over.” He guffawed, his smile radiating as he hugged Meg tightly, Y/N moving off to greet Carolynn, Jeremy’s wife, who had also surprised with her appearance. By the look of pride on Owen’s face, it was pretty clear who had planned the gift for his friends. Y/N held out a fist to Owen, who quickly pounded his own against it before the girl continued walking, making her way to Savannah’s side as they found their table in the restaurant far corner, the pair getting themselves sat down. With the two playing cousins on the show, they had both made an effort to get closer, an effort Y/N had made with the whole cast, though her and Savannah got on like a house on fire: they were the same age, and had assumed the roles of big sisters to the younger cast members like Madison and Jadah.

“Charlie’s jacket looks good on you.” Savannah commented with a wink, and Y/N rolled her eyes, shrugging the item off just as Charlie and Meg entered the restaurant with Jeremy, Carolynn and Owen.

“You need to stop; you know Kenny has started commenting on what a good couple we’d make thanks to you?” Y/N questioned, and Savannah nodded with a proud smile. “I suppose you actively put the idea in his head?” She quizzed further, receiving another nod.

“We’re all just waiting for you to get together at this point.” Savannah said with a shrug, a few sets of eyes looking over.

“What, Y/N and Charlie?” Sacha asked from across the table. “Oh, yeah, definitely.”

“Every three months we start a pool and bet on specific dates for you two finally giving in and dating.” Booboo said through a mouthful of bread. “Whoever gets closest is going to be so, so rich.”

“How many people are in on this?” Y/N asked, wide eyed with raised eyebrows. It was new information, at least to her it was, but the rest of the table had heard it all before.

“Sixty three.” Tori answered, sending over a wink as the table burst into laughter, quickly shutting up as the final members of their party started sitting themselves down, Charlie sliding himself along the booth chair to sit beside Y/N, Meg on his other side.

“What’s the joke?” He asked with a cocked brow, and Y/N shook her head, warning him to not venture any further. “Better not to ask, got it.”

“So, we’re thinking of karaoke later?” Kyra spoke up from the top of the table, earning nods from around the table. “Perfect, I’ll book the room.” She said quickly, typing away on her phone to set the group’s plans for the evening in stone.

“Maybe Y/N and Charlie can give us their ABBA medley.” Jadah suggested with a wiggle of her eyebrows, sat on the other side of Savannah. Y/N gave her the finger while Charlie chuckled, throwing an arm over her shoulder.

“Come on, it wouldn’t hurt you, would it Y/N?” Charlie asked, using his best puppy dog eyes on the girl, who reached to grab a slice of bread before Booboo finished it all, chewing it thoughtfully.

“Only if Sacha is our Dancing Queen.” Y/N said with a happy sigh, the blonde boy across the table nodding quickly.

“Happy to do it. Yes. Yes.” He nodded fast, feigning a bow as the table cheered, Charlie looking over at Y/N with a soft smile. She smiled back before resting her head on his shoulder, a part of her still recuperating from the interview. How these guys had done multiple that day, how Madi had sat through almost every single one, Y/N couldn’t figure it out; but the thoughts faded away as menus were brought over and drinks ordered, setting the evening off on the right foot.

By the time food was placed down, the topic of conversation was focused on Carolynn and Jeremy’s dogs, the pair quite happy to show off photos of their fur babies as castmates ate around them, with brief interruptions to talk about the upcoming wrap party the day after, and discussions of the season two premiere plans the following month. With the filming almost finished up, everyone was making plans to head back home to families as they all awaited the news of renewal for a third season. Apartments in Vancouver were being packed up, Y/N herself had started the process of boxing up the life she had made over the past year in the city, with her friends, to ship back off home.

“You alright?” A whisper came into Y/N’s ear, pulling her from her zoned out state as she twirled spaghetti mindlessly round her fork, blinking a few times before looking over at Charlie, who watched her with concern in his eyes. She nodded a little, setting down her fork and taking a sip of her soft drink before shaking her head, lifting up Charlie’s beer and taking a swig, frowning at the taste but swallowing anyway.

“Just thinking about leaving is all.” She muttered back, shrugging a little before trying again on her pasta, eating a mouthful before continuing. “Just, what happens once we wrap for the season? What happens if the show doesn’t get renewed?” She asked quietly. “I don’t want to lose all you guys… I just got you.” She tried to make a joke of it, but the thought had been weighing on her mind for a while. Would they all stay friends? Keep in contact even though they would be spread over the globe?

“I can assure you, sweetheart, no-one will be losing contact with you. If any of these guys love you half as much as I do, they won’t be able to say goodbye to someone as awesome as you.” Charlie whispered in her ear, his hot breath fanning over her neck, and Y/N blushed a little, taking his free hand in hers and giving it a quick squeeze to say thank you.

“How’s it all going, everyone?” The server broke apart the moment and halted the rest of the table’s conversations, Y/N and Charlie quickly dropping their hands and turning back to their own meals as the rest of the table chorused compliments of the food, Booboo and Jadah insistent that dessert menus be brought along as soon as possible. A quick glance around the table revealed that Y/N was extremely far behind the rest of the table in finishing her meal, but her appetite had suddenly disappeared, most likely from the melancholy.

“Could I get a triple vodka coke?” Y/N asked the waiter before he left, smiling up at him as she closed her cutlery.

“Of course, miss. Anymore drinks?” He asked, jotting down a cocktail for Halle and another small glass of wine for Jeremy, disappearing back into the main body of the restaurant as the last few party members finished their meals, drinks arriving with dessert menus.

“A toast.” Jeremy raised his glass, prompting the rest of the table to follow suit. “To Julie and the Phantoms, to found family… And to another season.” He thought over the words as he spoke, Carolynn watching him with adoring eyes, their hands linked atop the table. The toast was met with cheers, Owen letting out a rather loud ‘Whoop!’ as glasses were clinked and drinks were sipped, the night only just beginning.

Kenny Ortega was rather glad he had left Y/N and Charlie’s big confrontation scene for their last day of shooting, and after walking into work the following day and finding, quite literally, everyone glued to their phone screens, he decided to check his own Instagram.

The night before had been a success for the young cast, and after dinner the group had travelled into the centre of town for a night of drinks and karaoke, the evening’s highlight being the video that was circulating that morning, of Charlie and Y/N sharing a mic as they sang ‘Waterloo’ by ABBA: Owen had caught the whole thing and put it on his story.

That video was also followed by a photo of Y/N and Charlie sleeping on the couch together at Owen and Charlie’s place later that night.

There was a level of professionalism that had to be maintained in a workplace for productivity, but the ‘something more’ friendship the two guitarists shared had caught the attention of the whole team. It had started betting pools and conspiracies and a game amongst the team to catch pictures of the pair acting like a couple. The kids had started it, of course, but seeing the way the two interacted both on and off-screen had gotten the rest of the crew involved. There was an undeniable connection there, and the waiting game was part of the fun.

And so, as the cast started to arrive for the 12 pm call time on location at the garage, all the reshoots that day needing midday sunshine, no-one was surprised to see Charlie carrying Y/N into work on his back as the pair shared a joke. In fact, they were quite excited to see how they would react to the final scene they had to shoot.

Kenny had given them both the script the week before, but refrained from discussing it with the pair until that day, partially pressured by the likes of Savannah and Owen, simply because an authentic kiss, without the practice or specific instruction from the director, would make for better tv. The plan was to get some close ups, positioning them for certain moments, then run it through once, getting as many extra shots as possible, with the hope being they could do it in one take. At best, it would work, and at worst, both Charlie and Y/N were still actors, and could make a kiss look real.

It took about an hour or so for the cast to get through the makeup, hair and costume departments, and Kenny pulled in Jeremy, Owen and Madi for some reshoots first, leaving Y/N wandering with a bottle of water in one hand and her script in the other, pacing back and forth as she ran the lines over and over again in her head.

The scene was an important one, the start of Juke’s conflict for the season, of Grace’s and Julie’s friendship being tested. From what else the girls had filmed over the past few months, it was clear that the season would leave their friendship on a cliff-hanger, this scene being the catalyst. And it was funny for Y/N, to go from her friendship with Charlie to being Grace, the girl that hated Luke. It took her a little while to get into the right headspace, though it wasn’t easy with all eyes on her, nor with the teasing she was receiving from friends about the night before, and her crashing at Charlie’s. It wasn’t news, Y/N sleeping over at Charlie’s, or vice versa; it was common place actually, after the first few months of friendship it just became a norm for them.

Grace’s character arc was one of reckless abandon, and she almost becomes a bad influence on Luke’s bandmates with her risky ideas and rebellious attitude. They had shot the previous scene, in which Julie falls down the school bleachers while with Grace and twists her ankle badly, the character very lucky it wasn’t worse. And Luke, already disliking Grace, confronts her when the girl comes looking to apologise. The tension that they had built over the season boils over, and Grace kisses Luke, the first time either of them have touched before.

Y/N was a little nervous about that last part.

She was an actress, but it would be her first on-screen kiss, and while the thought of it being with her best friend should have eased her mind, it did anything but. Kissing Charlie, whether she wanted to admit it or not, was probably going to be awkward, cause a rift between the two for at least a little while. And that would have been fine, if they weren’t all heading off home to separate corners of the world for however long.

“You look worried.” It was Owen’s voice that pulled her from her thoughts, the girl turning to find him leaning against the prop table nearby, arms folded and a look of concern on his face. “You alright?” He asked, glancing back over at the set. Jeremy and Madison were still getting some reshoots done, and Charlie was with Savannah and Booboo over in costumes, chatting away as the seamstress sat his clothes just right.

“I don’t really know…” Y/N admitted, looking back at Owen with a shrug. “I mean, I just…” She paused, letting out a sigh. “I’m worried things might be weird? Worried I might suck at the whole kissing thing, ruin the last scene we have to shoot?” She explained, glancing back down at her script as Owen watched on, thoughtful.

“Y/N, you’re a good actress. If the last year has proved anything, it’s that you are meant for this role. You’ve just gotta… You’ve gotta embody Grace, don’t think of it as you and Charlie anymore, because I know that’s what you’ve been doing for the past week. It’s Luke and Grace, yeah?” Owen stopped to make sure Y/N was following, and she nodded. “We need to get you into that headset before we start, alright? You know how to be Grace; you need to get into her before the cameras start rolling. I mean, you’re already dressed like her.” Owen gestured to the clothes she was in, and Y/N smiled.

She did already feel a bit like Grace in the outfit, style choices she had helped to make at the start of the season. To contrast from Carrie, she offset her cousin’s pink and preppy wardrobe with dark colours: Y/N was currently in black jumper with red detailing, paired with a short, tight black denim skirt and a belt that pulled in her waist, plus the fishnet tights and sturdy doc martens her character would soon be known for. Those shoes were the only pair she had worn all season. The makeup and hair team had left her looking flawless, with her hair curling and her eyeliner in a perfect wing.

The more she thought about Owen’s words, the less anxiety she felt.

The more she felt like Grace.

“Ok, ok… We’re getting somewhere.” She informed her friend, Owen holding out an arm for Y/N to link with, the pair beginning a sure march over towards the set, watching Madi finish the last few takes.

“You need anything else?” Owen asked, raising an eyebrow to the shorter girl when she nodded, watching her take a deep breath.

“Put on some music? Just… Something fun?” Y/N asked, having faith that music would completely rid her of her nerves for the scene. Kenny called cut, Madi and Jeremy making their way off set with smiles as they headed towards Owen and Y/N, the blonde boy connecting his phone to the nearby Bluetooth speaker while the set was changed for her and Charlie’s scene.

“I can’t believe this is the end of season two… Y/N? You ok?” Jeremy commented then questioned as he came over with Madison, the latter reaching a comforting out to Y/N’s arm.

“She’s getting in the zone.” Owen explained, finally deciding on a song, the music playing around them and earning a few cheers from the other cast mates, Charlie looking over from where he stood with Savannah and Booboo, his eyes landing on Y/N, who had begun swaying along with the song. She had a habit of this, using music to get into character, though it was usually through headphones in some far off corner.

“Loving you isn’t the right thing to do.” The speaker sang out the Fleetwood Mac hit, Booboo and Savannah beginning to dance along by Charlie as he watched Y/N from across the room, curious as to what she might do. “How can I ever change things that I feel?” Lindsey Buckingham’s voice resonated around the room, and Charlie took a step closer to his main castmates, watching as Madi held Y/N’s hand, quickly realising why the music was blaring.

Y/N was nervous.

“If I could, baby I’d give you my world.” The tracks vocals were overshadowed as Charlie began to sing, heads spinning to look at him as he spun himself around and started his way towards Y/N. “How can I, when you won’t take it from me?” He sang, holding out a hand for her to join him. They were both well aware that two things in particular made Y/N feel better: the first was music, the second was Charlie. With a push from Madi and Owen, Y/N could no longer hide the smile that was forming on her face, taking Charlie’s hand as he led her into a space in the room’s centre. While the crew set up for their scene, cast and producers watched on as the pair got into character.

“You can go your own way!” Y/N sang out, spinning under Charlie’s arm with a grin that scrunched up her nose and made Charlie smile right back, singing the response harmony of the chorus. “You can call it another lonely day!” The pair sang together, Kenny himself starting a clap in time with the music, the whole set soon joining in, cheering the pair on as they got themselves into character.

“Tell me why, everything turned around. Packing up, shacking up is all you wanna do.” Charlie sang scowling at Y/N with his rather adorable grumpy face, and Y/N held a hand out to stop him from coming any closer, playing the part of Grace.

“If I could, baby I’d give you my world. Open up, everything’s waiting for you.” She sang, bouncing a little as she sang, shaking away the last of her nerves as the second chorus came in, the whole room singing along now.

“You can go your own way, go your own way. You call it another lonely day!” As the crew finished setting up the garage for their scene, Charlie grabbed Y/N’s hand as squeezed it tightly.

“We’ve got this, alright?” He reassured, and she nodded, the pair getting into places as the music slowly died down and their fellow castmates and crew members cheered.

“Feeling better?” Kenny asked as the two got into positions, Charlie sat inside the garage as Y/N stood just beyond the doors, being handed a bouquet of flowers by the props manager.

“A lot, yeah.” She smiled, and Kenny gave her shoulder a pat.

“Just go for it, alright? Give it everything, give it electricity, you’ve got this.” His motivational words brought a smirk to Y/N’s face.

“I know I do.” She answered with a nod, Kenny walking back to behind the cameras and taking a seat, Y/N taking a one more moment to focus herself before Kenny yelled ‘action!’.

Grace wasn’t used to feeling guilty about anything, it just wasn’t a part of the life she enjoyed: she wasn’t an inherently bad person, though it could be argued she was a bad influence. As she stood in Julie’s driveway, a bouquet of flowers in hand, she felt like a bad influence. No, worse than that.

She felt like a bad friend.

Julie wouldn’t be in this mess if Grace hadn’t convinced her to go out with her the night before. Of course, she should have known that this time of year, with the uncommon rainfall and milder weather, that the bleachers would have been slippery. Grace should have suggested going somewhere else, shouldn’t have rushed up the steps and forced Julie to follow.

And while flowers weren’t going to help a lot with the twisted ankle, she hoped they’d lift Julie’s spirits a little. The doctors said it wasn’t serious, just a week or so in a pressure sock to stop anymore damage, and Julie had promised her the day before she was fine, but even so. Grace had picked out dahlias, Julie’s favourite, and was hoping to bump into Alex or Reggie or Carlos, leave them with her apology for Julie without much confrontation.

Instead, heading up the driveway and pulling open the garage door, she was welcomed by the sound of an acoustic guitar, and a frown settled on her features. Of course, of all the people it could have been, Luke was the one at home.

“What are you doing here?” He asked quickly, jumping up from the couch and setting down his guitar. Grace sighed, a roll of her eyes causing Luke to scoff.

“You know, I’d punch you if I could ghost boy.” She muttered, setting the flowers down on the coffee table. “I just wanted to leave something for Julie, alright? Don’t get your…” She paused, thinking for a moment. “Do you have underwear? I mean, ghost clothing isn’t exactly my specialty.”

“You’ve got some nerve showing up here after what you did to Julie.” Luke said coldly, arms folded across his chest as they stood at opposite sides of the room. He took a few steps to the side, lifting himself up onto the piano. Luke liked to have the high ground.

“What I did to her? Luke, she fell over. It was an accident!” She exclaimed in response, already riled up just being in the boy’s presence. She wasn’t quite sure why she had been cursed with the ability of being able to see Luke at all times, but she wasn’t going to let her annoyance with the guitarist go unsaid.

“An accident that could’ve killed her!” Luke snapped back. “What if she had hit her head instead of just twisting her ankle? Can you answer me that Miss Influencer?” He asked, and for the first time since the pair had met, Grace didn’t answer him back. Luke scoffed; quite certain he had won. “I don’t know what voodoo you put my friends under to make them like you, but I promise I see right through you. Through the clothes and the Instagram followers. All of it.”

“Do you think I wasn’t scared for her? Huh, Luke?” Grace snapped back. “I was the one there, watching her fall down the bleachers, the one who rushed after her and called her dad. Where were you, exactly?” She asked, a smirk settling on her lips. “You know, Lover Boy, if I remember correctly, you were off moping because I’m a better guitarist.” Her tongue came out to graze her bottom lip as she smiled, walking over to Luke’s electric that sat on a nearby stand.

“First off, you aren’t. It’s quite clear who’s better between the two of us.” Luke fought back, jumping off the table and marching over to pick up his guitar before Grace touched it. “And second, I wouldn’t have left her if you hadn’t been there. Because actually, Grace, it’s you that’s the problem!” He had raised his voice as he walked back across the room, setting his guitar atop the piano. Grace scoffed; he just didn’t want her touching his things.

“Right, because Julie can’t have friends if it’s not you, right?!” She was almost yelling now as well, but it was to be expected of the pair. Every conversation they had had was building to this argument. Every conversation they had shared was just bickering. “Hey Mr Invisible Man, news flash! Your crush is allowed to have relationships outside of you! I realise being dead is probably very boring, but Julie’s alive.”

“I just don’t think my friends should be associating with someone as infuriating as you, Grace!” Luke turned to face her again, all wide eyes and gestures. “I didn’t think I could hate people before I met you! I’ve had my music stolen; I’ve almost been enslaved for eternity; I died! And yet, the person I despise most in this world is you. Congratulations!”

“I take it as a compliment! You know, I’m honestly proud that I’m not friends with a self-centred, arrogant, inconsiderate, overbearing jerk. If anyone is fooling our friends Luke, it’s you.” The words were quick and cold, and Luke found himself marching forward until the pair stood about a foot apart, Grace forced to to look up at him, keeping big her chin high.The words were quick and cold, and Luke moved a few steps closer, and Luke moved a few steps closer, the pair a few feet apart, glaring one another down.

“They aren’t our friends, Grace. My friends are just too nice to leave you hanging.” Luke voice had lowered in volume, but the venom was still there as he took a step closer, then another. “You act all mysterious, but you’re an open book, Grace. You’re a lonely girl with a taste of relevance. That’s it.”

“Like you aren’t the same?” Grace asked, stepping forward so the pair were no more than a foot apart. “Quit pretending you aren’t still the lonely kid who ran away from home in 1995, give up the high and mighty act.” She paused, looking him over with a smirk. For a moment, she forgot he was just air.

“I know who I am.”

“Do you?” Grace asked. “That’s not what I see.”

“You don’t know anything about me.” Luke countered.

“And vice versa, ghost boy.”

“I know you’re manipulative, and cold. I know you’re insufferable to be around.” Luke stated firmly, his voice low and laced with malice.

“Anything else to share?” Grace asked. “Or are you done?”

“This is exactly what I mean.”

“You don’t know me!” Grace answered back. “You don’t know why I’m here or where I came from, or what I came from. You don’t get to tell me who I am or what I do or how I act when you have made zero attempts to check your information. I know you because I ask about you! I can call you an arrogant, self-serving halfwit because I actually have tried to figure out why you hate me so much!” She paused for a second, Luke watching in surprise. He didn’t quite feel bad for Grace, but something was building in him, something foreign he had buried away. “If you knew anything about me, you would know what I’m about to do next.”

“What? Leave?” He guessed, his tone still harsh and hostile, but his answer was incorrect. It was quick, something Luke couldn’t process fast enough; but within a second of his reply being given, Grace had somehow managed to touch him, holding her hands to his neck and pulling him down to her level before pressing her lips against his.

—

Y/N and Charlie both had plenty of experience kissing people, but neither of them had felt like that before.

The moment Y/N’s lips were pressed to Charlie’s, it felt like a thousand butterflies had exploded to life in her stomach, the feeling of his lips on hers making her lightheaded. Charlie’s hands immediately came to Y/N’s waist, pulling her so their bodies were flush and her fingers found their way into the curls at the back of his head.

There was a moment there, as the pair held one another, as they kissed one another, that the rest of the world melted away. One of Charlie’s hands moving from Y/N’s waist to her cheek set the skin on fire, had her heart pounding like it was trying to break out of her chest, had her knees going weak that the only way to stay upright was to pull back, to rejoin reality.

It was only as she looked up at Charlie, still dress like Luke, her peripherals reminding her where she actually was, that a shaky breath left Y/N’s body, and she took a step back. Out of Charlie’s embrace, towards the garage doors she had entered the scene through.

“Make sure Julie gets the flowers… I…” She spoke as Grace, shaking her head in disbelief before exiting out of the garage, leaving Luke, or Charlie, dumbfounded. She couldn’t tell anymore if it was real or acting, the lines had blurred a fair amount.

“And that’s a wrap!” Kenny yelled from behind the cameras, the deafening sound of the cast and crew cheering forcing Y/N to slow her pace, to quickly get accustomed to the noise before joining in. A rather large part of her head was telling her to run and hide, to disappear and never return, to book it for the airport and save herself the embarrassment of her flushed cheeks, of seeing Charlie after what she just felt with his lips on hers.

Her eyes eventually travelled up to see Charlie coming off the set with Kenny in one side of him and Jeremy on the other, Madi and Owen walking over to meet them, the latter waving her over quickly with a grin.

“That was amazing to watch!” Kenny was raving when Y/N arrived over, hands clasped behind her back as the director turned his attention to her. “What did I ask for? Y/N, you nailed it! You both did! The whole place was just electric.” He complimented, Charlie letting out a breezy chuckle as he raised a hand to rub the back of his neck.

“What can I say? You hired some great actors, Kenny.” Charlie felt off saying the words, glancing over at Y/N as he said them, the pair sharing a weak smile. What Charlie had felt while the cameras rolled was definitely not something he faked for the screen. His stomach was still in knots, trying to untangle itself after the way Y/N had kissed him left him speechless.

What exactly was he supposed to do? That information had the ability to ruin the friendship he and Y/N had, he couldn’t risk losing her so permanently. He knew Y/N, if they talked about how he felt kissing her and didn’t feel the same way, Y/N would distance herself from any and all contact, and with them all heading home by the week’s end, it was the last thing Charlie wanted to happen.

“That I did.” Kenny agreed, glancing at his watch. “Right, I’ll let you all go and get out of costume. Wrap Party begins in an hour.” He said with a nod, patting Y/N lightly on the shoulder as he left.

There was a moment of silence between the five of them, an uncommon occurrence, no-one quite sure who should speak first. Instead of speaking, Y/N gave Madi’s arm a squeeze before heading off to the costume department to get out of Grace’s head. Maybe the thoughts of Charlie would clear up once she was back in her own clothes, her own headspace.

The four friends watched her walk off, waiting until she had rounded a corner before Charlie received three pairs of hands punching his arms playfully and shaking him, all their of his on-screen band mates barely able to contain their excitement.

“What, what?” Charlie asked, taking a step back to avoid further battery.

“What?!” Madi exclaimed. “That kiss! Charlie, we all know that wasn’t acting.”

“I’m pretty sure everyone in Vancouver could tell that wasn’t acting.” Jeremy added with a grin, nudging his friend who was slowly getting some colour in his cheeks.

“You guys are all insane.” He said quickly, starting his way over towards makeup, but his friends were hot on his tail, none of them letting this budge. Not again: Charlie and Y/N had gotten away with their flirty behaviour plenty of times before, but this was different.

“You should at least talk to her about it.” Owen said with a grin, hands stuffed in his pockets as they entered the trailer and Charlie sat down, helping himself to makeup wipes and removing the thin layer of foundation on his face. “Charlie, come on… I know that your eyes were closed, but we watched you two kiss. If you’re feeling something, Y/N is feeling it too. There’s no way you both faked that.”

“I’m not ruining my friendship with Y/N over a stage kiss.” Charlie said quickly, pulling off his shirt and switching for his own clothes, looking up as the door opened and Sacha came in with Savannah and Tori, the seven all sharing glances.

“Convinced him to go for it yet?” Tori asked after a moment, and Charlie rolled his eyes, jumping out the chair and walking past his friends. “Oh, come on Charlie! It’s clear you both like each other!”

“Tori’s right!” Madi agreed, first in following Luke out onto the trailer lot. “Why are you so hesitant?” She asked, and Charlie came to a quick stop, spinning on his heel to look at his friends.

“I’m going to go see Y/N. Not because of whatever fantasies you all have in your heads, but because I want to make sure my friend is alright.” Charlie explained, though his words didn’t seem to convince any of them. That was fair, he didn’t convince him. “I’ll see you all at the wrap party, ok?” He clarified, but before he got an answer he made his way into the maze of trailers, taking the precise turns needed to get to Y/N’s trailer.

As he turned onto her row, Charlie found himself slowing to a stop about two trailers away, and taking a nervous gulp. Why, why had it taken so long for him to figure out his feelings? Why was it only once they had kissed that he felt all this emotion surging to the surface? For a moment he wondered if it was just his body reacting to kissing a pretty girl, but he knew that wasn’t the truth. Not in the slightest.

The truth was Charlie wanted nothing more than to feel that ecstasy that came with Y/N’s lips on his all the time, and he quickly formed a do or die plan in his head as his feet started back up, bringing him to the steps up to Grace’s trailer. Her name was pasted with gold sticker on the white door, the tension quickly building in Charlie’s chest.

Do or die.

The polite triple tap on the door hurried Y/N’s getting ready, the girl quickly zipping up her dress before slipping on her shoes for the night and answering the trailer door, the butterflies exploding in her stomach as she found Charlie stood in front of her door.

“Got a second? I was hoping we could talk…” Charlie said quickly, hands shoved in his pockets, a nervous smile on his face that had Y/N thinking the worst. This was about the kiss, it was about how awkward he felt about it, no doubt. She knew her anxiety before it was right, she knew that this would ruin things.

“Of course, come on in.” She said with a little smile moving back onto the trailer and allowing Charlie to make his way inside. As Y/N turned to pick up her phone off the table and place it into her handbag for the party that night, Charlie closed the door behind him with a nervous breath. He watched her for a few moments, smiling at her absentminded humming of the song they had sang together while she packed her things away for the party tonight. He took a step closer, running a hand through his hair and straightening his top up, psyching himself up for what he was about to do. She had changed for the party, and Charlie couldn’t help but admire how beautiful she looked in the baby blue sundress. “So,” Y/N asked as she started to turn around. “What is it you want to tal-”

Y/N was cut off when Charlie gripped her by the waist and crashed his lips against hers, not that she minded in the slightest. She was quick to kiss back, her hands coming to his neck as his hands pulled her closer until their bodies were flush. Whatever worry Y/N had been having about what their characters’ kiss would do to her and Charlie’s relationship was evaporated by the heat, the passion, the electricity of his lips on hers.

Charlie was hit with relief when Y/N kissed him back, when she pulled him closer, just thankful that she might have felt exactly what he did on set. He was about to pull away, apologise for what he was doing, for intruding and not letting her ask her question, but as he pulled back to take a breath, Y/N caught his bottom lip between her teeth for a moment, and Charlie was gone.

He pulled her close again, this time his tongue entering her mouth and starting a battle for dominance against Y/N. His hands travelled towards her ass, only gaining control of the kiss when he surprised Y/N by picking her up. She wrapped her legs around his waist as her dress rode up her thighs, hands moving from his neck to grip the front of his shirt, breaking off the kiss for a moment.

They looked at one another, breathing heavy and pressed to one another, both just trying to comprehend what they had done. Y/N was the first to catch her breath, looking up at Charlie with a blush across her cheeks and blown pupils.

“No-one’s ever kissed me like that…” She whispered out, smiling as a smirk played on Charlie’s lips.

“Same.” He responded, walking over and setting her down on the trailer’s kitchenette counter, a hand coming to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. “We’re… We’re idiots, right? For not realising it before?” He asked, and Y/N laughed.

“The amount of time we’ve wasted…” She muttered before pulling him for another kiss.

It quickly became heated again, neither of them quite able to control themselves. It was tongues and teeth and moans, and it wasn’t long before Charlie was leaving a hickey on Y/N’s neck and she was pulling off his shirt, quickly reminded of her friend’s body… God, he was hot.

“How long until the wrap party?” Y/N asked through a moan as Charlie pulled away from her collarbones, marks scattered over the skin Y/N would struggle to hide. He pulled his phone from his pocket, checking the time before setting it on the counter beside her.

“About 10 minutes…” Charlie answered, raising an eyebrow when Y/N bit her lip. “What did you have in mind?” He asked, stepping closer, his hands running up the sides of her thighs as he did, pushing her dress up further until he could catch a glimpse of the pastel pink panties she had chosen to wear that day, causing him to groan a little. He could feel his blood rushing down, his jeans becoming tighter around the groin.

“Well, I mean… We’re two consenting adults…” She trailed off for a second, her hands starting on his belt buckle in an uncharacteristically bold move. Charlie’s head fell back as her hand brushed against his bulge, breathing getting heavier once more. “And I’m on the pill…” She added, pushing Charlie’s jeans down slightly, then his boxers, her hand circling his shaft and beginning to stroke it slowly. She was teasing him, waiting for a response, an innocent look on her face that drove Charlie wild. He quickly pulled her panties off, tossing them to the floor and bringing a hand back to her core.

“So wet… And all just for me.” Charlie smirked as Y/N’s expression changed from feigning innocent to one of pleasure: a whimpering moan passing her lips as her eyes fluttered shut, a reaction to Charlie’s thumb circling her clit. “You know, all you had to do was ask.” He whispered in her ear, more of a growl than anything, quickly lining his cock to her entrance and pushing himself inside.

They shared in a moan, Y/N adjusting to the size of his length inside her for a moment, her walls clenched tight around him. They stayed like that for a moment, both adjusting to the feelings, before Charlie’s thumb started up its lazy circles around Y/N’s clit once more. She gave a nod, and Charlie pulled back, this time sinking himself all the way inside her.

They started slow; Charlie enjoying the view of Y/N whimpering in pleasure as she held onto him, begging for him to go faster. He didn’t comply right away, teasing her further with his length, but when she managed to utter out a ‘please’, the bucking of his hips quickened, Y/N’s whole body soon dissolving in the pleasure.

Neither of them had any experience with heaven, but if it was even half as good as the sex they shared, the afterlife would be amazing. Their bodies just worked together, like they were made for one another, each thrust and moan sending pleasure shooting through their bodies. Charlie set the pace, making sure to watch Y/N’s reactions when he changed angle, quickly finding the thrusts that gave her the most pleasure through lidded eyes, and Y/N would tease him further, her walls hugging his cock just enough to have him slipping out curses mixed with her name. It didn’t take very long for Y/N’s legs to begin trembling, Charlie’s hands spreading her thighs further apart as the knots began forming in her stomach, one of his hands moving to hold the small of her back while the other returned to his spot over her sensitive bud.

“Charlie… Charlie I’m close.” Y/N managed to say through breathy moans as the knots in her abdomen got progressively tighter, Charlie moving slightly to find a better angle, beginning to pound mercilessly into her cunt, a smirk on his lips. Her mouth formed into an ‘o’, her eyes rolling back behind hooded lids dusted with eyeshadow for the party that night, the one they were meant to be arriving at 5 minutes earlier.

“Come for me, sweetheart.” He muttered, pressing his lips down on her collarbone as Y/N came undone at his words, the spasms of pleasure bringing forward Charlie’s own release, the smirk quickly fading as he felt his own climax approaching. “Fuck… Y/n, fuck…” Charlie muttered, his thrusts quickly becoming sloppy as he edged on Y/N’s climax, letting out a moan as he shot his load, his head rolling back and his muscles flexing as he filled Y/N, prompting an aftershock to run through the girl, eliciting whimpers from her shuddering frame.

Charlie soon stilled, both of them panting as they came down from their highs, Charlie’s hands on Y/N’s back the only thing keeping her vertical. He leaned forward, pressing a kiss to her forehead gently before pulling out, letting out a hiss from the over-sensitivity as Y/N giggled through a whine.

“Jesus…” She muttered, taking a moment before slipping off the counter, lifting her panties from the floor as Charlie tucked himself back into his jeans and grabbed his t-shirt, the clothing item having landed on the back of the nearby couch. “I’m… I’m gonna clean up.” She informed him, unable to stop smiling as she disappeared into the bathroom, leaving Charlie to smile to himself and fall back on the couch with a beaming grin.

How had any of that actually happened?

He sat back up when Y/N came out of the bathroom, her hair fixed and her dress straightened again, though the blush on her cheeks and nose still remained. Charlie smiled and pulled himself off the couch, walking over to her and quickly pressing his lips to hers. She kissed back, the action shared between them soft and sweet this time around, though it still caused butterflies to erupt in both of their stomachs.

“I was thinking… I know you’ll need to go back home and visit family, obviously… But maybe you could spend a few weeks at my place in LA?” Charlie suggested his thumb rubbing against Y/N’s cheek as they held eye contact. “Meet my parents, maybe?” He added with a nervous chuckle. They had planned for her to meet his mom and dad at some point, and him hers, more for the fact they wanted their parents to know their best friend, but that had obviously changed… Best friends don’t fuck half naked in a trailer on their filming lot.

“I would love that… But you have to come home with me afterwards.” Y/N said with a smile, letting out a sweet laugh as Charlie nodded vigorously, the pair locking lips once more.

That night, when Charlie and Y/N walked into the wrap party with their hands interlocked, there was a relief that sat in the air for the cast and crew. Finally, after a year of betting pools and theories and who only knew what else, it seemed the two had finally stopped being idiots and acted on their feelings. It was confirmed when during a slow song, Charlie pulled Y/N onto the dance floor, the pair sharing a kiss as the music played.

On the side lines, it was Meg, Charlie’s sister, of all people who stood collecting cash from crew members. She had got herself in on the betting pool last time she visited, and had guessed the exact date the pair would finally take their next step.

The question of Charlie and Y/N’s budding relationship should have been a ‘who would’ve thought?’, but, in reality, everyone knew. From Madi to Kenny to literally everyone on the entire planet…

Except for Charlie and Y/N.

Tags: @lord-of-the-fried @lolychu @deadashcapper5 @aliceinemeraldcity @eries45 @kristencoontz @walkingonshunshine @wxshing-aep @oswin05 @voguesir @delicatelukepatterson @reggieandthereggies @siennanoelle01 @dxsxstxrhxxd @reggiesleatherjacket @a-whole-a-lot-of-fandoms @thetattooink @futuremrsb-r-main @charliessunset @mlt2000 @overlyhypedup @fangirlanonimax @writerinlearning @dxlanhxlland @manaoioahilinai @cocobuttababy @rosiemay02 @crookedoperatoroperagarden @theatricalfangirl @middaydramatic @mloudfish @mps427 @sweetdayme4427 @anagc-09 @feliamtion @ohyoureaqueenbutuncrowned @caitsymichelle13 @amortiff @lovesanimals @crappy-unicorn @avs-hart @ghostlyb1tch @lukeys-giggle @aunicornmademedoit @carleywhittaker @crybabyddl @writella @isabellaskyliner @moonyxnights @dmcfarland1 @kiss-themoongoodbye @kcd15 @ellepscal @bookdealer5 @leahstypewriter

(i’m doing really badly at tagging everyone who asks, so i’ll be sorting out my taglist around halloween to make sure i can keep all of you up to date on my writing!)

#luke patterson #charlie gillespie #charlie gillespie smut #charlie gillespie x reader #luke patterson x reader #charlie gillespie x y/n #luke patterson x y/n #jatp luke #jatp #julie and the phantoms #smut #fluff #fluffy smut #charlie gillespie imagine

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nahoney22 · 3 years

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hi queen! i’m not sure if requests are open or not so if they aren’t ignore this lol🤍 but i am an angsty bitch so i was wondering if u wanted to write an angsty hunter.. maybe like a fight happens or he’s just being a dick. alright my toxic side is showing LOVE YOU🤍🤍🤍

Hello my love! Requests are open and I’m alwayssss in the mood for some angst ❤️ sorry for the delay!

A Fighting Chance

➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵

Hunter X GNeutral!Reader

word count: 1.9k

The pressure had finally took its toll on you. The constant running and leaving a brother behind was not settling right with you which leads to some conflict between you and your Sergeant.

warnings: basically just angst, unhappy reader, unhappy hunter, arguing, sad boy hours. some comfort at the end.

—————————

The tension in the Marauder was sky high that night. The crew members were huddled in different areas of the ship just to escape the fiery rage that was bouncing against the walls from yourself and Hunter.

Tensions had been brewing for some time between yourself and the Sarge, ever since the dreaded Order 66 happened and ever since you have left Crosshair behind.

Conflicted, you had wanted to go after Crosshair, get that stupid chip out of his head but Hunter had insisted otherwise. He wanted to keep flying and keep a low profile but of course, keeping a low profile was never Clone Force 99’s style.

Every day you had risked arm and leg for that Trandoshan down in Ord Mantell and you didn’t trust her as far as you could throw her. You hated the dangerous missions she gave you, you hated how rude she was to you all yet still ended up doing dirty work for her and you hated how it blindsided Hunter.

“Echo?” Omega’s sweet voice rang into the cockpit where himself and Tech were occupied. Her fingers were tapping apprehensively against each other as she kept looking back and forth from the cockpit, making sure yourself or Hunter were not around.

He hummed in acknowledgement, pausing what he was doing to spin around in his chair to face the girl.

“Are Hunter and Y/N alright?” Her voice was mixed with anxiousness and sadness. She bonded with you all so well but to see you slowly pull apart from her brothers was tearing her down, she didn’t want to end up with nobody.

Echo turned to Tech who glanced up from under the control panel, both sharing a certain look.

“It’s… complicated Omega. Y/N is just upset about the Crosshair situation.” Echo rubbed the back of his neck. His feelings on the matter were indifferent. He liked Crosshair but at the same time, there was too much to risk; especially after he shot Wrecker.

“And Hunter isn’t?” Omega then asked, her eyes wide with uncertainty.

“We don’t know, kid. It’s best to stay out of it.” Echo tells her and goes to turn away but Omega grabs his chair and stops him.

“Is there not anything we can do? Can we not save Crosshair?”

“That’s not our call. That’s Hunters.” He sighed, crossing his arms over his chest.

Omega sighed and jumped into the pilots seat, legs tucking up to her chest. “I didn’t realise this was affecting Y/N so much… I hear them crying sometimes you know? At night? Or in the fresher?”

Tech sat up and placed his spanner to the side. “We have all heard it Omega,” he stated, pushing his goggles up on his nose, “but we know it is in our best interests to not interfere with their emotions. We leave them to it.” Tech spoke though his voice hinted at guilt.

“That… that doesn’t seem right,” Omega shook her head. She wasn’t the closest with you in comparison to Hunter and Wrecker but nonetheless she still liked you a lot but did find it hard sometimes to get you to open up to her. “I didn’t know they was that close to Crosshair.”

Echo and Tech shared another look. “They were, opposites ends of the same stick so to speak but he always found comfort in them the most and vice versa. They were close.” Echo sighed as he told Omega, his head tilting low as he remembered how happy you used to be, especially around Crosshair. You brought out a whole different side to the sniper and now it had been swept away.

“Did Hunter know they were close?”

“He did. Not like that matters to him.”

Omega spun around quickly, Echo leaning forward to see you walk up from the back of the ship, overhearing the conversation being had. Omega’s face dropped, not like it had been happy in the first place but watched a small flare ignited in your eyes. Echo and Tech remained silent.

“It did matter to me.” Then, Hunter spoke up. You paused as you spotted Hunter walking up the steps to the Marauder, pulling his helmet off his head.

“You certainly have a strange way of showing it.” You remarked, leaning against one of the power consoles.

“And you have a strange way of showing gratitude.” Hunter remarked just as bitterly making you laugh almost mockingly.

“Gratitude? For what? Risking my life for some Rancor? Some Spice? Some kriffing Separatist Senator?” Echo swiftly turned back around in his seat and pretended he wasn’t listening, you had already given Hunter a piece of your mind when it came to helping this Senator in the first place.

Hunter entered the ship, placing his helmet to the side and took a seat next to Wrecker who remained silent most of the day, the arguing was starting to upset him too so he quickly got up and stepped outside for a breather. “We need credits to survive. We can’t survive if we don’t have money, no money means no food.”

“All this time we’ve been acting like fools on a rampage when we could have stormed Kamino and taken Crosshair with us. But no, you made us leave him.” You spat in anger.

“He tried to kill us.”

“Because of a chip, Hunter!” You exasperated, throwing your hands up in the air. “The same chip that we removed from Wrecker after he went rogue too.”

Hunters jaw tightened. He had had countless nights, tossing and turning as your muffled cries lingered in his ears even from the opposite end of the ship. Leaving his brother had taken its toll on him too but he believed what he was doing was for the best. “I am not having this discussion with you. We’ve been fine and we will keep doing these jobs for Cid wether you like it or not.”

He goes to stand and leave but you stopped him, pushing yourself off the console and pointing towards the cockpit, in particular to Omega. “Fine? Omega being taken not by one but two Bounty Hunters is fine is it? Leaving your brother is fine is it? How selfish can you be.” It wasn’t a question, it was a statement.

Hunter could hear the pounding of your heart and his skin became irritatingly hot at the close contact. “Sometimes people need to take risks and I’ve taken risks, even if it means leaving a brother behind.”

“And those are the words of a Sergeant?” You declared, nostrils flaring at his arrogance. “Would you leave Wrecker behind? Echo? Tech? Because you definitely didn’t hesitate to save Echo from a base of Separatists despite never knowing him and saving Omega. What if it was me? Would you leave me for dead as well?”

A pin dropping couldn’t be heard from the Marauder, just the soft vibration of the ship settling followed by a small gust of wind from outside. Hunter stared into your eyes and for the first time didn’t see the anger, he saw the pain.

“Everyone off the ship. I need to speak with Y/N alone.”

Nobody moved at first, Omega almost about to insist she wanted to stay but Tech had grabbed her and already started pushing her down the stairs, Echo following behind and making sure to close the door for privacy.

You had stepped back, pacing the main hull as Hunter watched you. “Y/N… this needs to stop. Stop fighting me.”

“Do better then Hunter.”

This time it was him to have pain in his eyes as he stared at you, looking at your back as you finally stop, placing your hands flat on the console. He watched your back raise and fall as you took deep breaths and the flight clenching of your fists.

“I don’t know what you want from me. We go to Kamino, we die. We do missions for Cid to get money and you hate it. Why is it just you who has a problem?” Your Sergeant asked, taking a small step closer to you but not enough to overstep your boundaries.

“You never ask us what we want, it’s about what you want. When was the last time you genuinely asked how we were?”

Hunter goes to answer but his mouth snaps shut. He didn’t know. He didn’t know and it felt like getting shot in the chest again, over and over. How could he have been so selfish? He never sat down with them to talk anymore, it was always getting money and getting ready to run at the next possible moment.

“Exactly.” You took his silence for acknowledging his fault at last. “Hunter we are tired, we are tired of these missions that are taking us to nowhere. I am tired of missing Crosshair knowing that there’s some chance we can actually get him back.”

“Are you speaking for yourself or for all of us?” He countered.

Truthfully, you were speaking for yourself but you knew the others thought it. You saw how Omega would sometimes sneak peaks at Crosshairs old weapon chest, you saw how Tech would ramble to himself and turn to see if anyone was listening but nobody was there as it always used to be Crosshair; Crosshair liked listening to Tech. Wrecker would tease everyone but it wasn’t the same as when him and his vod used to tease one another, he got more quieter.

“I’m sure they would agree.” You sigh silently, glancing at him over your shoulder. “I… I can’t give up on him. We can’t give up Hunter.”

There was a wavering in your tone, your heart heavy as if someone had dropped a tonne of rubble on it. Hunter could taste salt, salt from your tears that were about to slip.

His façade of being a brave and resilient Sergeant was breaking as he watched you turn away, followed by a small splash of a tear drop hitting the floor.

His blindness had caught up to him and he saw how it was slowly braking the team apart. The bickering, the cold stares, the lack of rest was killing his team.

“I love you Hunter.”

You sobbed in agony, eyes clenched tight as the tears slipped. “I love you all so much but I can’t do this.”

He stepped closer, hand resting on your shoulder and span you around to face him as his hands landed firmly on your shoulders that were shaking as you sobbed. It felt as if something was scratching at your throat, begging to escape as you tried to hold it in but you couldn’t. You tried so hard to keep in your emotions and go cry in private but here you stood in front of Hunter, someone you began to loathe but not out of hatred but out of love. You wanted your brothers back, all of them. “I… I would rather die a thousand times if it meant trying to get Crosshair. There has to be a fighting chance to save him…I would do anything, please Hunter.”

“We… we love you too. I’m so sorry you’re hurting.” He sighed and that’s when you finally brought you into his arms, his arms tight and secure around you. “You’re right.” He breathed into your hair as your tears seeped against his armour. “You’re right we need to get him back and we’ll do just that. We will all be together again I promise.”

—————

🍓back to masterlist 🍓

#the bad batch #star wars #clone wars #tbb #bad batch hunter x reader #hunter x you #hunter x reader #bad batch angst #bad batch one shot #hunter bad batch one shot #clone sergeant hunter #bad batch hunter

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wisewidow · 3 years

Text

Hello, Your Parents Want Me To Have Your Babies

PAIRING: Natasha Romanoff x Reader

SUMMARY: Melina, my workplace’s neighbour, wants to set me up with her daughter.

I'd only ever hear about Natasha every couple of weeks, when her adoptive father, the mechanic that owned the garage workshop beside my father's cafe slash bar, met up with my uncle for beers one day last year. Ever since then, our families have been loosely intertwined, friendly but not too close. Alexei fixed my mom's wrecked car for a cheap price, in return I let his youngest daughter Yelena have free coffees whenever she pops over.

From what my father told me, Alexei's entire family, including his wife, were all involved in the family business of repairing cars, except for his eldest daughter: Natasha, who turned out to be an FBI agent living in Quantico. Dad says they're proud of her but they miss her.

"(Y/N)," my brother calls from the kitchen. I put down my phone and find him balancing three plates of sandwiches and a salad in his spindly arms.

He opens his mouth to explain the orders, but I cut him off.

"Alexei," I say, pointing to the bacon and egg sandwich. "A salad for Melina. The tuna and tomato roll is Yelena's. Did they want drinks?"

Peter nods. "Four coffees and a large bottle of water, they already have them."

I ruffle his hair to thank him and grab the plates, balancing the third on my forearm until I can place it on a tray. I carry it outside, years of waitressing practice keeping it balanced, and head towards the garage.

"Melina?" I call. Moments later the raven haired woman slips out of the office and smiles. She yells something in Russian that causes Yelena to slide out from under a silver BMW, covered in black grease. Alexei appears moments later wielding a spanner.

They hound me for their orders, gratefully patting my shoulder and carrying their food away to their separate stations. Yelena disappears into the shadows with her sandwich, and her father to his desk, but Melina simply brightens and says, "(Y/N), have you heard? Natalia is visiting."

"Yes!" Alexei yells around a mouthful of bread. "Family, reunion! Grandbabies!"

Melina hisses something in their mother tongue. I laugh, and then ask if Natasha was bringing her kids, though I wasn't aware she had any.

"He means nothing of it, Natalia is focused on work at the moment. Too focused, I think. No babies. No partner."

"Tell her about her penthouse!" Alexei encourages.

Melina flaps a hand at him in irritation. "Yes, well, she has broken up with Bruce, the shy scientist from work. And then Sharon, charming field operative, also from work. And now she refuses to date. Because of work."

I chuckle nervously. "Where are you going with this?"

Melina smiles innocently. "Nowhere. What happened to your last girlfriend, again? Your father mentioned something about . . ." The look in her eyes is enough to egg me on, though the subject is one I rarely speak of these days.

Rubbing the back of my neck, I say, "Carol left to travel Europe."

"Shame," she nods sympathetically. "You don't seem bothered. Are you not looking for a relationship?"

"Not actively, but I'm sure another troublemaker will find me. I don't have a good track record of steady relationships," I admit.

"Neither does Natalia!" Alexei shouts.

"Oh!" I say. "Does she want Carol's number? Or my friend Harley, she's not looking for commitment."

Yelena snickers. Alexei frowns. Melina chuckles. "No, no, Natalia needs someone she doesn't work with, and you need someone serious, and we need grandbabies before we die, since Yelena neglects it."

I flush a bright red. "Grandb— I'm— okay, first of all, neither of us have the equipment for that—"

"Neither did Dad," Yelena pipes up, referring to the fact that she and her sister were adopted.

"Hey!"

"(Y/N)!" Peter calls, rounding the corner. "Ned's coming over to pick me up, we need to finish our physics project. Uncle Ben should be here soon, can you manage the bar until he gets here?"

I jump onto the excuse and yell back affirmation, say a quick goodbye to Melina before speed-walking back to the cafe.

Peter leaves with Ned soon after, and Ben arrives at around the same time. I move to the kitchens while he takes over serving our regulars, as he's friendlier with them than me.

I work on making more sandwiches and tapas meals until four, when my shift ends. I kiss Uncle Ben on the cheek and head home.

The smell of paprikash greets me as I unlock the door to my apartment, which I guess means that my roommate is home. I call out a hello to her and head to the shower.

I groan happily as the hot water rains down on my front. I close my eyes and lean my head back, thinking over how strange the day had been, and lose myself in a trance of relaxation.

"(Y/N/N)!" Wanda barges in. I jump and almost slip grabbing the shower curtain to cover my body as I peek out at her.

"I'm naked," I hiss.

She ignores me and holds up two clothes hangers. "Pantsuit or dress?"

I push my wet hair out of my face. "Uh, are you bar-hopping with Vision or going to a family dinner?"

"Get together with some friends," she explains. "Vis, Sam, Steve and some guy named Bucky who I'm informed we're supposed to be pretending Steve isn't in love with, do you know him?"

"Nope."

"Okay, well, he's bringing some friends, so I'm bringing you. Don't make that face, you know almost everyone."

"I don't feel like getting drunk," I complain.

"Good! You can be the designated driver. Pantsuit or dress?"

Grumbling, I tell her, "Dress."

"Okay, thanks, you wear the pantsuit, be ready by seven. May the Force be with you!"

She ducks as I throw my shampoo bottle at her. We bicker and mock and tease as I pat myself dry and she changes into the scarlet dress. While she braids her hair, I carefully slip into the navy and white striped pantsuit, and we move into her bedroom to make use of her vanity, since the sun's lowering position in the sky shone straight into the window while my room would be encased in dimness by now. I sit in the chair and she leans over me, brushing her eyelashes with delicate mascara. We fall into our normal going-out-getting-ready rhythm, periodically handing each other different brushes, comparing lipstick shades, and commenting on our days. She tells me about her brother's latest shenanigans and I make the grave mistake of commenting on Melina's attempted set-up earlier today, much to Wanda's entertainment. The two had never met but they both shared the pure ecstasy that came with matchmaking involving me.

"Do you think she's pretty?" Wanda wonders.

"I've seen photos," I shrug. "She's a redhead. Yelena says she changes hairstyles often."

"That doesn't answer my question! Pretty redhead or no?"

"They were baby photos, Wanda! I didn't have an opinion on her looks past the Wonder Woman pajamas."

She hums, and turns to draw a small heart under my left eye with her gel liner pen. "It would be nice if you wound up with her, but if you do fall madly in love with her beautiful red locks and decide to move to Washington to marry her and have her babies, I will murder you. You pay your rent on time and you're fun and please, please do not make me move back in with my brother."

"Why does everyone keep bringing up babies?" I yell.

An hour later we're pulling up to the bar in the back of a cab arguing about getting a cat. The debate of whose bathroom would host the litter tray is interrupted by Wanda spotting Vision through the window and quickly smacking my arm and hissing at me to hurry up and pay so she can sneak in and scare him. Unfortunately, I can't locate my purse inside my bag.

"(Y/N), (Y/N), go, go, go . . ."

"Wanda, Wanda, going, going, going . . . Aha!" I pay the driver and find myself being ushered inside before I can put my purse back in my bag.

Sam, a friend of Wanda's from college, ends up foiling her evil master plan by pointing her out as soon as she walks in the door. Vision, being a good sport, pretends to be startled when she yells "BOO!" in his ear. As she cackles manically before sliding into the chair beside him, I notice the only free space is by the pretty blonde woman beside a man with brown hair pulled into a bun.

"Oh, look who I dragged out with me!" Wanda exclaims, taking a sip of Vision's drink and making a grand gesture with her hands. "(Y/N)!"

I'm greeted with a chorus of hello's. I bow and grin as I sit by the woman and offer a polite smile. Steve leans over points to the brunet man. "This is Bucky, we were close as friends. As kids. We were close as friends, when we were kids."

Sam snorts into his beer.

Steve clears his throat awkwardly. "And this is his partner from work, Nat."

I get a closer inspection and my eyes widen in shock. "Natalia?"

"Her name is Natasha." Steve corrects.

"I thought her name was Natalie?" Vision frowns.

"She goes by Nat, who cares?" Sam shrugs.

"Natalia Alianovna Romanova?" Wanda yelps. "(Y/N)! You didn't tell me this was the Natalia!"

"The what? I— Do I know you two?" Natasha asks, bewildered.

"Not me!" Wanda says, and then makes a motion for zipping her lips shut.

Everyone turns to me. I chuckle nervously. "I should probably explain. Hi, I'm (Y/N), your parents want me to have your babies."

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x y/n #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff oneshot #natasha romanoff fluff

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ancientstone · 2 years

Text

Random Untamed Alchemist AU Thoughts

Masterpost

Lan Wangji inherits Winry’s habit of throwing things. The only difference is that you never see Wangji do it. Wei Wuxian simply spouts utter nonsense and BAM! A spanner to the head! When the stars stop spinning Wei Wuxian finds Lan Wangji with his back turned, completely engrossed with a book or a project. He always denies everything.

Jiang Cheng knows. Jiang Cheng also keeps his mouth shut in exchange for expensive oil for the armour.

Jiang ‘Hitting my brother on the shoulder is how I show affection but I can no longer tell how much force I’m putting behind these punches’ Cheng vs Wei ‘Holy shit that hurt but also it’s my fault my brother’s stuck as a soul in unfeeling armour so I must put up with this for his sake’ Wuxian.

“Wei Wuxian, you cannot put a catapult in your arm.”

“Wei Wuxian, you cannot put a gun in your arm.”

“Wei Wuxian, you cannot put a flame thrower in your arm.”

(When he joins the Wen army, he does. He uses it exactly once, burns off his eyebrows, and gets ratted out by Jiang Cheng to Lan Wangji, who personally arrives the next day to remove it.)

In an attempt to make his brother feel less like a Big Scary Monster, Wei Wuxian paints images and scenes all over the armour. These include: Lotuses (their sister’s favourite), little clouds, two stick figures fighting with swords (on Jiang Cheng’s back where he can’t see), a flute with small cartoon music notes, and turnips.

During the night when he has to sit awake, Jiang Cheng paints a snake coiling up his right arm. It’s purple, for some reason.

Jiang Cheng hates the rain because they all wash off. Wei Wuxian carries paints so he can do them again.

Upon request, Wei Wuxian paints a portrait of their sister inside the armour, right behind the breast plate where Jiang Cheng’s “heart” would be.

Wei Wuxian’s absolute favourite Getting Away tactic is to climb into the armour.

Jiang Cheng’s absolute loathed Getting Away tactic is when Wei Wuxian climbs into the armour.

The Alphonse Existential Crisis Scene, but the angst is rolled up to ten because it’s Jiang Cheng and he’s worse at forming his thoughts into words.

“Tinkering with automail again.”

“Lan Zhan! How could you accuse me of such a thi-”

“Wei Wuxian.” Jiang Cheng deadpans. “Your arm just fell off.”

“Oh.”

The one thing Jiang Cheng deems to be Good™ about all of this is that he’s now officially taller than Wei Wuxian. But he also spends months hitting the helmet against every door frame he tries to walk through.

Upon realising that smoke bombs are dope, actually, Wei Wuxian makes a gadget on his arm which releases thick black smoke.

He does not smoke out an entire building when creating it and cause a mass panic, thank you very much.

At some point there is a very raw, very emotional conversation between the Lans and Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng about why they chose to try and bring their sister back, and not their parents who died several years before. They have to explain how unhappy their family was when their parents were alive, and how different Jiang Yanli was to them - how she was soft and cared and never raised her voice.

#the untamed #cql #untamed alchemist #wei wuxain #jiang cheng #lan wangji #the untamed au #written in stone

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weasleydream · 3 years

Text

i’ll never fall - Ginny x reader

I’m so so sorry that it’s so late! I wrote this for @pregnant-piggy ‘s writing challenge but I got a bit too inspired, I haven’t written that much in so long! Once again, congrats for 2k love <3

My prompts were: “Who do you see when you look at me?” ; “I will never forgive myself for the things I’ve done.” ; and “And you are sure it has nothing to do with the fact that you’re in love with them?”

Also, once again I think I messed with timeline

As usual, feel free to like, comment, reblog and enjoy!

Masterlist

If we were being picky, we could say that all of this began the day Tom Riddle was born. However, this specific point in the history of the wizarding world was the beginning of so many stories that no one could count them all, and mine was complicated enough without mixing them: that’s why we’re going to say that it all began the day I realized I had been manipulated.

_ _ _

It was as if nature itself knew what was coming. If the first of September was usually a bright day, the sun we had been hoping for was a long lost memory erased by the incessant rain. Somehow, even the traditional babblings on platform 9¾ were missing, replaced by parents’ doubts and students’ fears. Was really going to Hogwarts in this year of 1997 a good idea? Dumbledore’s death had been a strong hit to everyone, and now that we knew Snape would be at the head of the school, no one was reassured. Not even Molly Weasley who was usually so valiant. On the platform, with one hand on Ginny’s back and one hand on mine, she seemed as nervous as everyone else, and the fact that she couldn’t look away from Arthur for more than three seconds was the proof we didn’t need.

I remembered perfectly each first of September since I had received my Hogwarts letter. It was five years ago, and I was sure the view of the red train had never provoked such a wave of panic in me before. I glanced at Ginny; she was looking at me, her face closed in an attempt to hide what she was feeling and what she was fearing. A discreet nod confirmed what I already knew: she was as afraid as I was. Somewhere on our left, a voice said both our names, and we turned around to greet Neville. He hadn’t even needed to use a strong voice. He was pushing his cart on which his bags were stacked. On the top of the pile was sitting proudly a little plant.

“Mimbulus mimbletonia?” I asked, and he nodded quietly.

The locomotive whistled and we headed to the nearest door, after having looked away from Ginny and her parents exchanging a quick hug. Most of the compartments were empty, which seemed strange as we had never seen such a small amount of students in the train. Neville led us to the very last compartment where Luna was waiting for us. She said hello, but even her bright personality seemed altered. I really didn’t like this, and it was only the beginning.

Half an hour after the beginning of the journey, I left the compartment to find my other group of friends. Friends was maybe a big word: in fact the only one I got along pretty well with was Zillah. She was a Hufflepuff and I knew her since we were five or six. Our fathers had worked together for a while in a muggle factory when they were younger, hers because he was a muggle and mine because he and my mother had left the wizarding world when He-who-must-not-be-named had risen the first time. Zillah greeted me with a small smile, and one or two other heads looked up to me. I identified a Slytherin guy in the corner opposite to mine but that didn’t surprise me, Zillah was the kind of person that didn’t let such things as houses determine who she loved.

“You didn’t give me a lot of news,” she said when I sat next to her, which forced another girl to shift to the left.

“I know, I just… I was busy.” I looked around quickly, checking that no one was listening to us. The four other persons that were here seemed to be chatting, and only now did I realize that the atmosphere was less heavy than with Ginny, Neville and Luna. Anyways, I decided it was safe enough for me to speak. “You know, with that stuff about my parents…” I added in a lower tone.

Zillah moved closer to me.

“And? Did you find anything?”

“Nothing conclusive. I guess that’s a good sign.”

Zillah nodded and recovered her previous position. She knew what I was talking about: since a few weeks before the beginning of the summer, my main preoccupation was to find out if my parents - and the rest of my family - were or had been death eaters. A lot of old rumours had resurfaced, and my parents, along with one of my aunts and her half-brother, were suspected to belong to the dark side. I had spent the summer looking for proof, investigating, and I now thought that at least my mother wasn’t guilty of what she was accused of. I still had a doubt about my aunt’s half-brother, but we weren’t blood related, so I had decided it wasn’t my problem, and something was off with my father.

“I guess you’re relieved,” suddenly commented Zillah. “Now you’ll stop hiding it from your friends.” Indeed, Luna, Neville and even Ginny didn’t know anything about it, and it had been especially hard to hide during the last two weeks that I had spent at the burrow. Ginny obviously knew there was something off with me and had asked me about it several times, but I didn’t want her to know that, not when Neville had made some comments that had persuaded me I was suspected too. “You don’t seem relieved, though.” she added with a suspicious look. “Are you sure you didn’t find anything conclusive?”

“There’s maybe something about my father,” I mumbled, “but I don’t know what to think about it. Something he did a year or so before You-know-who’s fall that makes me think… Well, it makes me think maybe there’s a possibility that he’s killed a muggle family.”

“What?” Zillah’s voice was louder than expected, and the conversations in the compartment stopped briefly. “Why would he have done something like this?” she asked more quietly when chatters filled the compartment again. “I thought he was clean?”

“I told you I don’t know what to think about it… Something’s strange, but I don’t know what.”

Zillah nodded but stayed silent. She didn’t seem that surprised anymore, as if it was something she had been suspecting for a while. It created a big contrast between us because I was still deeply shaken by the news. Learning that your father might be the assassin of an innocent family wasn’t something you could accept easily. The conversations in the compartment stopped briefly, and I wondered why until I noticed a prefect’s head that had appeared through the glass. It was a girl from Ravenclaw, and she glanced briefly at us before walking away.

“Do you think she’s looking for You-know-who?” guffawed the Slytherin guy.

Everyone in the compartment chuckled, Zillah included. However, it wasn’t the kind of subject that made me laugh, and I suddenly felt really out of place among these people. I hastily saluted Zillah and left the compartment. I took a few steps just to be out of their sight, and then I stopped, asking myself if I really wanted to go back to Ginny, Neville and Luna. It wasn’t a pleasant sensation, Ginny was the person I was the closest to in the school, but she was really friends with Luna and Neville, and she shared way more with them than with me. If Luna was kind to everyone and me included, Neville had often shown restraint with me, without mentioning the few times I had caught him becoming suddenly very silent as soon as I had stepped in the same room as him. Finally, I decided going back to their compartment was better than spending the rest of the journey standing between two glass doors.

“- sorry he was ever born. Harry said it was him who killed Dumbledore, he’s not going to get away with it that easily, trust me.”

It was Ginny who was talking, and she didn’t stop when I opened the door. She just shifted to the left to make some room for me, and I sat after having made sure that the door was well closed. Making that kind of comment in a train crowded with people whose intentions weren’t all clear could be very dangerous.

“And how do you want to proceed?” Asked Luna. “Don’t you think he’ll think some people are thinking like this?”

“We don’t care,” said Neville. “He’ll pay for what he has done.”

“If any of you has an idea, feel free to suggest it. That goes for you too, Y/N, okay?”

I nodded, but a feeling of uneasiness had invaded me. Ginny looked at me with a raised eyebrow, asking me silently what was in my mind.

“If Snape is at the head of Hogwarts… don’t you think he’ll ask other death eaters to come with him?” A silence greeted my question. “Of course it doesn’t mean I won’t help you!” I added precipitously, “Just that we should be really careful. I’m not sure we know exactly what’s coming, that’s all.”

“You’re right,” said Neville. “But death eaters or not, everyone who throws a spanner in our work is going to have to face us.”

_ _ _

No matter how hard I had tried to convince myself that Hogwarts would be extremely different from before, the sight of the castle took a severe toll on me. The atmosphere reminded me a bit of the one that had enveloped us when Sirius Black had escaped Azkaban: full of fear and Dementors in the sky and around the park. It didn’t look like the safest place on earth anymore, that was for sure.

It was in silence that all the students that were in the train joined the castle. I was next to Ginny; Neville and Luna were just behind and I could see Zillah’s head a few meters in front of us. It didn’t take a long time to realize that the fears I had expressed before were founded: at each side of the entrance door were three people, all dressed in black, with a severe expression and a very straight posture. A whisper ran through the crowd of students; were they death eaters? The answer came to us in the form of a shout from a massive man.

“Shut up and move!”

From the corner of the eye, I saw Ginny stiffening and glaring at the guy who had just yelled. She had never looked as dangerous as right now, and I knew better than to think that it was an appearance.

“Ginny!” I hissed as quietly as possible. “Stop this!”

“But he’s-”

“I know!” Of course I had recognized Amycus Carrow, who had tried his best to torture Ginny only a few months ago. If he had failed, it was just because Ginny had drunk some Felix Felicis before the battle of the Astronomy tower. “But if you don’t want them to show what they are capable of, you’ll have to keep it cool until we’re in the dorm.”

She sighed loudly and nodded. If this time I had adopted the voice of reason, it didn’t mean that I wanted to stay here longer than necessitated, so I picked up the pace to walk past the death eaters. The sigh of relief I wanted to breathe when they would be out of sight stayed blocked in my throat, though: people all dressed in black were standing at regular intervals and this, on each side of the corridor. The silence was heavier in the inside of the castle; it was as if, without being clearly told, everyone had understood that staying quiet was for the best. Only the sound of our feet on the stones could be heard, and it was in this tense atmosphere that we arrived in the Great Hall.

The four main tables were still here and still the same. It was naturally that I followed Ginny to the Gryffindor table and took place next to her; and only when Neville was sitting in front of us while Luna was joining her place did I realize that the professors’ table was way smaller than before. A few more death eaters were standing in a corner, but Snape’s presence at the exact place Dumbledore used to stand at was the reason everyone was looking in this direction without a word.

“Look at him…” murmured Neville, which caused him to deal with some terrified looks.

Snape hadn’t even pronounced anything yet that he had already terrorized half of the school. Then his voice thundered and repercuted between the naked walls and the once magical roof that was now devoid of stars and colorful banners.

“Things have changed, and they will keep changing.” He paused and his eyes wandered amongst the students. I could have sworn his gaze had stopped on us, and according to the shiver that shook the girl next to me, it wasn’t just an impression. “From now on, the school is mine, and the rules you will follow are mine. Each breach of the rules will cost you a price much higher than a few house points. Any attempt to rebel will be severely punished. I also suggest you to remain in the ranks, or else the consequences could be unfortunate.”

As soon as the echo of his voice disappeared, Snape turned heels and sat in the central seat of the table. He lifted his hand and the doors opened; a seemingly exhausted professor McGonagall was walking in front of a bunch of terrified first years, and to the sound of their steps added weak sobs. When she walked past us, McGonagall glanced quickly in our direction, and from the corner of the eye I saw Ginny nodding imperceptibly. When she finally reached the single wooden stool that had gone unnoticed until then, it was with a firm voice that she shouted the name of the first student. It was as if she was trying her best to ignore the fact that Hogwarts had become the most dangerous place for us all, or maybe to show us that we weren’t alone in this.

The dinner - because it was hard to call this a feast - was conducted expeditiously and the first students to leave the great hall didn’t stay more than twenty minutes. Almost an hour and a half after our arrival, Snape’s watch dogs forced the remaining students to leave the great hall and to join the common rooms. A frightening silence was reigning everywhere in the castle, and the cosy common room of the Gryffindor house wasn’t exception. A very few people were occupying the sofas around the chimney, there wasn’t any first year left, and most of the students following us directly took the direction of the stairs leading to the dorms. Neville saluted us quite darkly and disappeared too.

“I didn’t think it would be so… the way it is.” I whispered as Ginny and I were sitting around a table in the corner of the room. “I remember the day we first entered the great hall… All these terrified kids, it’s awful. They’ll have to pay.”

“I agree. It’s a good thing that a few members of Dumbledore's army are still here, we’ll need as much help as we can get. We’ll have to-”

Ginny suddenly stopped and jumped on her feet, glaring at some point behind my back. I got up too, on the verge of asking what was happening, but the noise that echoed gave me the answer. Amycus Carrow and a woman that looked just like him had barged in, and they were now barking on the third years that were on the sofas. When one of them muttered that they had no right to come here, the woman drew her wand and pointed it between the guy’s eyes. Completely terrified, the latter followed his friend without another word. Understanding that it was useless and dangerous to provoke them at the moment, I went around the table and grabbed Ginny’s wrist. We took the direction of the stairs and we had almost disappeared behind the stone when we both saw it. Amycus Carrow had just nodded at me with a polite smile on the lips. Ginny’s arm moved quickly and a second later, she was shutting the door between us.

_ _ _

“The Weasley girl still doesn't want to talk to you?” asked Zillah with her mouth half full of bread as I was sitting next to her.

This had become the usual greeting she gave me each morning since I had camped in front of the Hufflepuff common room’s door, just after this thing with Amycus two weeks ago. Ginny had refused to talk to me since then, not even giving me a chance to explain, and of course the next morning Neville’s glares had added to hers. Even Luna didn’t look at me with her natural kindness anymore. Zillah had seemed very surprised when she had seen me the next morning; because I had spent the night on the hard floor of the corridor or because no one had caught me, I wasn’t sure. Still, she was now the friend I seemed to have in this castle.

“No, still not.”

“I think she needs time. I mean, she thinks you’re getting friendly with a death eater. You told me it’s the one who tried to torture her last year, right?”

I hummed and Zillah shrugged.

“Then I understand why she’s upset.” she paused to pat my shoulder. “Maybe she’ll even come to you first, who knows?”

“I hope so…”

Then a silence took place. My eyes were fixed on Ginny who was talking with Neville and Luna. The three of them were isolated from the rest of the Gryffindor that were in the great hall for breakfast, which wasn’t a lot. It was clear that their attitude was hiding something fishy with them.

“Are they preparing something?” suddenly asked Zillah. She was looking in the same direction as me and had a reprobatory look on her face.

“Probably, yes. They want to defend the castle,” I said before shaking my head. “I hope they’ll be prudent, it would kill Molly if something happened to her.”

“Yes, it looks like Ginny and her mother are really close to each other.”

I glanced at Zillah, surprised that she knew so much about Molly. As far as I knew, she had never talked to a Weasley. But my interrogations were cut short when an altercation burst on the other side of the great hall. Neville was standing up to one of Snape’s friends, and he was hiding a young girl behind him, probably a first year. Luna slipped underneath the table and grabbed the girl’s hand, leading her outside while Ginny was trying to calm Neville down. Finally, the silence came back when he agreed to follow her, and they disappeared behind the huge door.

“I still don’t understand why you don’t scream in their ears until they listen to you.” Zillah paused the time to let Snape walk to the professors’ table before getting closer to me. “I mean, your side of the street is clean, right? It’s not your fault if Amycus is weird.” I shrugged, trying to find the good words to explain why I had been waiting for two weeks instead of grasping the nettles. “Unless you think you have a reason to blame yourself, of course…” She finished with an interrogative look.

“Well… One of her brothers has been badly hurt by Fenrir Greyback, and his wedding has been ruined by death eaters. Another of his brothers was poisoned last year because of Malfoy. She has more reasons to hate the death eaters than anyone else and… I still don’t know what happened with my father, and I have even more doubts since this thing with Carrow... I just feel like it’s not right to stay by her side if I’m not sure that my father’s innocent, you know?”

Zillah nodded.

“I think you’re right, you can’t risk her hating you for nothing,” she conceded. “But how will you find the answers you’re looking for?”

“I don’t know.” I grumbled, before slamming my fist on the table. “It’s so unfair! What the hell is happening? Why does it have to be happening to me?”

“Relax Y/N, I’m not sure you want to make a scene in the middle of the great hall.” Zillah wrapped her arm around my shoulders. “You know you’re not alone, right? Whatever happens with Ginny and the others, I’m still with you.”

_ _ _

It was so unexpected that it took a few seconds for me to process what I had just heard. I was walking in the corridors somewhere near the library when three voices stopped me dead in my tracks. The voices were coming from behind the door that was just in front of me, belonging to three men I had never heard before even though they were obviously part of Snape’s watch dogs. At first, the voices were too low and all I could hear was a blur of unidentified sounds. But as soon as my ears were used to the muffled words, I realized they were talking about a particularly severe punishment and I had the feeling that I knew who was the target.

“ - couldn’t get them yet. Seems like the director is nervous about this and we all know how he can be when he’s not satisfied. He says it may be for today.”

“Maybe, but the fuckers are well organized, and we can’t just take them like this. The seniors won’t let us and we can’t afford to have the Order in our way.”

“The third year we’ve interrogated earlier said they were preparing their things in a special room in the castle, the room of requirements I think he said. Seventh floor. We can take a shot.”

“Never heard of this before, you sure he didn’t lie to you?”

“Trust me, he knew better than that.”

The first who had talked said something else, but I didn’t hear it. I had taken a few steps back and my brain was almost burning: how could I avoid Ginny and the others getting caught? I knew what was going to happen if evidences were found, I myself had paid full price for defending a bunch of terrified second years in front of Alecto Carrow and the sanction reserved for Ginny, Neville and Luna oughted to be even worse.

The wooden door suddenly opened, leaving me defenseless in front of three death eaters that drew their wands as in one. I was so terrified that my brain, which was so fast only a few seconds ago, seemed to be freezing along with the blood in my veins.

“I suggest that you find a good excuse for listening to us, or I can promise you you’ll regret it.” threatened a tall and thin man, whose face seemed to be the copy of a rat’s.

“I know what they’re going to do and where I can tell you if you want.” I blurted out before holding my breath, praying that they would be convinced.

The three guys exchanged looks, and the one on the left seemed dangerously sceptical. Finally, the rat-faced guy nodded and lifted an eyebrow.

“It’s for soon, in the potions classroom.” I started, trying my best to keep control of my breath. “I believe they want to make it explode, I’ve seen them gathering all sorts of forbidden products. I think they’re already there, but-”

“You better be telling the truth.”

With that, the three men left precipitously and as soon as their bodies had disappeared from my sight, I turned tails and ran in the other direction. I needed to get to Ginny as soon as possible to warn her not to do whatever she had in mind. By the time I had gotten to the seventh floor, my legs were burning and my lungs felt like they were on the verge of exploding. Without losing a second, I began pacing to make the door appear but someone’s arrival interrupted me.

“You here? Get out of here, you traitor!”

It was Seamus, and he rolled up his sleeve as if to address his words.

“Seamus!” I exclaimed, which definitely surprised him. “I need you to tell Ginny to stop whatever she’s preparing. She’s in danger, you hear me? In danger! Someone denounced her to Snape and he knows she’s here with Neville, Luna and whoever helps them. I led the death eaters off the scent but it won’t be enough, tell them, okay?”

And with that, I left as quickly as I had come, afraid that the wrong person could see me here and guess what had happened. I glanced in my back one last time - Seamus was still looking at me, seemingly very confused, but he nodded silently before being hidden by the wall. I only managed to join the fifth floor when a voice shouted loudly.

“You! Stop!”

I had been caught.

The rat-faced guy grabbed my arm, his fingers tightening me so tightly that it felt like he was touching my bones. He was almost growling, the sound coming from the depth of his throat and terrifying me as much as a snarling wolf would have. The man, Marcus as it seemed since one of his friends called him when he joined us, abruptly pulled my arm to make me walk behind him. His pace was quick and determined, and his jaw tightly clenched. As far as I could see, he was furious, and the little hope I had left vanished. I didn’t even know if I would make it out alive.

The three men brought me to an empty classroom that I was positive I had never been in before. The tables were all covered in a thick layer of dust, some of them were broken and so were the chairs. There was no window, only one door and the latter closed quietly behind us. I had the intuition that it wouldn’t open that easily, and definitely not soon.

It was dark in there, but not enough to be blind. That made me realize that the walls had a certain number of cracks, and for a second I thought of screaming with all the breath in my lungs. Marcus probably had the same idea at the same time; before I could do anything, he cast a silencing spell on me.

“This way, we’re sure we won’t be bothered.” he whispered with a twisted smile.

My heart began to beat at a terrible pace, and the fact that I was trying to scream so loud without even producing a whimper made me feel so defenseless that I never tried to protect myself. I just waited for the punishment, knees getting numb on the stone floor, expecting the pain without receiving it. It looked like it wasn’t what Marcus wanted; he tried to get me to react, maybe even attack him in what we both knew would be a desperate and useless attempt to escape; he pushed me before putting me back on my knees, insulted me, described me all he would do to me, all he wanted to do to Ginny, but I didn’t want to give him satisfaction. I wanted to focus on something else than the torture I was about to suffer, and all I found was to imagine Ginny swooping in to save me and telling me she wasn’t mad anymore.

However, it wasn’t Ginny’s voice that I heard when the first Cruciatus spell hit me, and it wasn’t hers either that I heard during the unending time that the punishment lasted.

_ _ _

“Y/N? Y/N?”

The voice seemed to come from a dream, muffled as if I had cotton in the ears, distant and soothing.

“Y/N!”

It suddenly became louder, more defined, and with the proximity I heard something else in this voice. Something that wasn’t soothing, it was the contrary; it was anxious and stressful, not very steady but not shaking either. More importantly, it was Ginny’s voice.

I opened my eyes, and it took a moment to remember where I was. The classroom. I could see the tables that had been moved around me, and I could even see the walls which was impossible before. A tall silhouette was getting close to me, someone that I couldn’t identify because the door was open behind them and there was too much light. The person that was now next to me kneeled and Ginny’s features appeared. She seemed disturbed, sad too.

“She’s awake!” she shouted above her shoulder, which made me screech. My head was on the verge of exploding. “Come on,” she added more softly as her eyes were on me again. “We’ll bring you somewhere safe.”

I nodded and let her and Neville, who had gotten in too, lift me to put me back on my feet. My legs had never felt so heavy and devoid of strength, I was nothing more than a dead weight as the two carried me out of this hell. As we got closer to the door, I identified three more persons; Zillah was standing next to Luna, and Seamus had taken a step forward to help Ginny. The latter shook her head and I felt her grip on my waist tightening.

The way to the room of requirements - I had heard Neville mentioning it, so I had supposed it was our destination - was essentially composed of stairs, and no matter how hard I tried to help Neville and Ginny, there wasn’t an ounce of energy left in my body. Every single cell was terribly painful, I had never suffered so much in my life before.

We finally reached a corridor of the seventh floor, the same in which I had stumbled upon Seamus earlier - how long I didn’t know though, it was another question I would have to ask. A huge door appeared and Ginny half carried me inside. She helped me reach a makeshift bed on the floor, and as soon as my head touched the fabric, my eyes closed.

And they stayed closed for a while, or so I supposed when I woke up. The room was no longer almost empty, it was more looking like an anthill now that all the beds and hammocks were occupied. But it wasn’t exactly time for sleeping; all the conversations were forming a soft buzzing somehow reassuring. Despite my sore body, I sat up and took a better look around me. The room wasn’t huge, maybe a bit bigger than a large classroom, not much more. The beds were in fact makeshift mattresses with colorful blankets, and the hammocks that were as colorful were suspended to the walls. There were also two banners hanging from the wall in front of the door; one for Gryffindor and one for Ravenclaw.

“It’s because we only have Gryffindors and Ravenclaws here,” said Ginny as she arrived from behind me with a water bottle. She handed it to me and I glanced to thank her before drinking avidly. “Though we probably will have to add another, your friend Zillah is here too. Very curious, maybe even too much.” she frowned before shaking her head. “But it’s not important. Are you feeling better?”

Ginny waited patiently as I was finishing the water. The sips I took were now longer and I was slower for a very good reason: I didn’t know what to say. Ginny wasn’t stupid though, and she gestured toward two Ravenclaw girls that I didn’t know. They nodded and left, leaving the two of us alone in this corner of the room.

“Y/N, I need you to tell me how you’re feeling.”

I could have answered a lot of things, like hungry, cold, afraid, sore… It was all true. Yet now Ginny was next to me, caring for me, and there was only one answer that seemed correct.

“Safe,” I murmured.

“You are now.” she whispered back. “We’ll make them pay, you can trust me.”

I nodded. The thought was somewhat soothing, but I couldn’t focus on that. It seemed strange that after such a long time spent seemingly hating me, at least avoiding me, Ginny was now sitting next to me, bringing me water and promising she would seek vengeance for me.

“Ginny, who do you see when you look at me?”

She looked up to me, seemingly surprised.

“I see one of my best friends that has been tortured to protect me. I know, Seamus told me,” she added before I could say anything. “I don’t see a traitor or an enemy, if that’s what you were asking. I’ve never seen a traitor or an enemy. Just… Someone I didn’t trust enough, I guess.”

I looked away, slightly hurt. I would have trusted her with my life, even before all of this. Knowing that it wasn’t mutual was something I would have a hard time to accept.

“Y/N, trust me, I’ll never forgive myself for the things I’ve done to you. I shouldn’t have been so mefiant, I should have given you a chance to explain.”

“Yes, you should have.”

Ginny looked away, something that looked a lot like regret painted all over her face. It was rare to see her displaying her deepest emotions, it caught me by surprise and it was without thinking that I wrapped my arm around her shoulders.

“Don’t worry, you trust me now, right? That’s all that matters.”

Ginny nodded and stared at me with an interrogative look.

“Can I ask you something?” She didn’t wait for my answer and continued. “Why didn’t you try to explain? Actually, what happened that day? Why was Carrow so… nice with you?”

“I don’t know why,” I mumbled. “I found it as strange as you. As for why I didn’t explain, it’s… it’s complicated, Ginny.”

“I think I can understand.”

There was no way I could avoid this discussion, that was clear. So I sighed and told her everything about all the research I had gone through, why I suspected my father to be a murderer, why I had felt like I didn’t have the right to be her friend. Ginny stayed silent for a while, and I didn’t have any idea on what her reaction would be. Her face was closed, she was looking at some point in the opposite corner of the room, where Zillah was talking with Luna and another Ravenclaw girl.

“And what was Zillah’s reaction when you told her you didn’t feel like you could be my friend?”

I hesitated before answering. The question was weird, it was not really what I was expecting but Ginny seemed to be deep in her thoughts.

“She said that I was right, I shouldn’t talk to you before being sure my father was innocent. Why?”

“You don’t find it strange that she didn’t advise you the contrary? To come to me and try to explain?”

“I… don’t know.” I hesitated again. “Ginny, what are you thinking about?”

“You noticed that Zillah was there when we found you in the classroom, earlier?” I nodded. Yes, I had seen her, even though I wasn’t expecting her when it was Ginny, Neville, Luna and Seamus that she was accompanying. “No one told her what you had done, and she wasn’t with you before. She’s the one who led us to you. How did she know?”

“Ginny… I know where this is going, but you’re wrong. Zillah’s my friend, and she didn’t even know what I was going to do! I was alone when I heard their conversation and I didn’t see her afterward.”

“I’m not talking about this.” Ginny’s voice was calm, and it was firmly that she grabbed my wrist to address her words. “Y/N, I’m not saying she denounced you to the death eaters. I’m saying she denounced us to them, and you just happened to hear them.”

“But how would she-”

I suddenly stopped because the question was useless. I knew how she had learnt about what Ginny, Neville and the others were preparing. Something as burning as acid slowly crept in my veins; it was guilt, because I was the one who had told her.

“I’m sorry Y/N, but it looks like you gave your trust to the wrong person.”

“Ginny, I’m- I’m sorry, if I had been-”

“It’s not your fault. I promise she too will pay for hurting you.”

Ginny was now infuriated; if her face was stoic, her eyes said it all for her.

_ _ _

“Zillah?” repeated Luna. “I knew I shouldn’t have warned her about the Wrackspurts. She deserves to have her brain go fuzzy.”

“Brain fuzzy or not, at least we know who the traitor is.” added Ginny. “Now, we have to confront her.”

“But we have no proof,” interjected Neville. “We’re not sure that she’s really the one who ratted us out, maybe she found us just because she was looking for Y/N. As for the ‘you shouldn’t talk to Ginny thing’, it’s not a secret that she doesn’t like us, maybe she just wanted to keep Y/N for herself.”

“It can’t be a coincidence,” said Ginny. “And I refuse to let her get out of this just because we’re not sure.”

“You’re making it personal.”

“Of course I’m making it personal!” exploded Ginny. “You saw Y/N too, didn’t you? You helped me carry her because she had been tortured so much that she couldn’t even walk! How can I make it anything else than personal?”

Seeing them talking about me as if I wasn’t here was getting annoying, so I just interrupted them. It caused me to deal with a murderous look that disappeared as soon as Ginny realized it was me.

“Neville’s right, we can’t do anything as long as we’re not sure. And it’s not by sitting here that you’ll find the proof you’re looking for,” I added before Ginny could interrupt me. “Maybe we should stop talking and begin searching.”

“You’re right,” she conceded. “Neville, Luna, you should start asking people about Zillah, but only people we trust, okay?”

Neville rolled his eyes, either because of the obvious recommendation or because Ginny had taken her time to admit he was right, but he still got up and followed Luna. As for me, I ignored Ginny’s piercing eyes when she asked me to follow her out of the room of requirements. We both stayed silent for a while: everytime one of us wanted to say something, someone stepped in the corridor we were in and silence was never broken.

“I know what you’re doing.” Finally said Ginny as we were heading to the library. She brushed aside my innocent face and continued. “I think you’re still hoping that she’s innocent.” It was useless to deny it; of course I didn’t want Ginny to be right, so instead of trying to find excuses, I shrugged. “I get it that it’s hard for you Y/N, placing your trust in the wrong person is… Well, it’s not very pleasant. But you have people you can trust around you, you have real friends. You have me.”

“Thank you Ginny. I- I needed to hear that.”

She nodded and accelerated a bit to open the library’s door in front of me.

“You didn’t tell me what we’re doing here,” I murmured as I was following her through the shelves until we stumbled upon Madam Pince.

“Can we go to the restricted section? It’s important.”

Madam Pince simply nodded and Ginny gestured to me to follow her.

“Since when can we go to the restricted section without any authorization?” I asked, flabbergasted.

“We have one, Madam Pince just allowed us, didn’t she?” Ginny glanced at me with an amused look. “It’s not the first time I’m searching in this section for information, that’s all.”

“I’ve been several times too and I always needed a note from a professor,” I grumbled as Ginny opened the door of the section. Once sure we were alone in it, Ginny turned to me and finally explained why we were here.

“We’re going to do some research about this muggle family you think your father has killed.”

“Why?”

“Because there’s something strange, and with Zillah’s reaction, I wonder if her family isn’t involved.”

“Impossible,” I objected. “They are muggles.”

“That’s what she told you.” I was beginning to find this far-fetched when she asked me something else that made me doubt. “Tell me, does Zillah seem scared by the whole muggle born thing to you?”

I opened and closed my mouth several times. Now that I thought about it, she didn’t seem even concerned by the several attacks and controls that the muggle borns were suffering. I hadn’t heard her talking about it once, and if we added the behaviour I had found inappropriate in the train, then it was natural to think that maybe she had something to hide. As Ginny was still monologuing, I found a table in a corner between two shelves and pulled a chair; I hadn’t said anything about it, but all the cells of my body were still burning, making every movement really painful.

“Does it still hurt?” asked Ginny from behind me. Her hand suddenly appeared in front of me, holding a vial filled with potion. “It’s for the pain.”

“Thanks,” I mumbled before drinking it straight. “So, where do we begin?”

The next hour and half was spent pouring over genealogy books and articles mentioning murders and death eaters. The potion Ginny had given me had made me sleepy, my eyes were closing despite my will to stay awake to find information, and Ginny eventually decided it was enough for this day.

“I’m going to bring you back to the room of requirements, and then I’ll help Neville and Luna, okay?”

I nodded and let her put back in their shelves all the books we had been reading. Then we left the library and joined our little safe place. Ginny only left after having made sure I was in my bed and too asleep to move away from it.

_ _ _

“I gotta admit you were right,” mumbled Neville, the eyes still fixed on the picture he was holding.

“I knew it, there was something strange from the beginning! Zillah is a liar and she had us all.”

Ginny had finally found the proof she had been looking for for days now: my father wasn’t a murderer. He had probably never known the muggle family that had been killed, I would have to ask him if the opportunity arose. The picture was a good enough evidence in itself: it had been taken by a muggle that lived in a street close to where the murder had occured, only a few minutes after the presumed moment of the facts. It showed a man leaving an alley with what looked awfully like blood all over his clothes. He was a wizard, which couldn’t be denied as he was holding a wand, and more importantly, his face wasn’t my fathers but the same as Zillah. I had first objected that it could be a coincidence; that was great because I was now sure my father wasn’t responsible, but maybe it wasn’t a member of Zillah’s family? Ginny had then handed me a copy of a muggle newspaper that mentioned a guy with Zillah’s family name, saying that he had been missing for a week. He had disappeared two days before the murder.

“But-” I had tried to object before Neville interrupted me.

“Listen Y/N, I think that these are unquestionable evidence. I understand that you refuse to believe that your friend lied to you, but it seems pretty obvious to me that she isn’t the person she says she is.”

“Even if it’s his father, it doesn’t mean that she knew!” I exclaimed. Neville and Ginny exchanged a glance that I didn’t like at all, and Ginny sighed.

“There’s something we haven’t told you,” she began. “We didn’t want to break it to you unless we were sure, but with all the things we’ve found, there’s no doubt left. You know this Slytherin guy she’s always with?” I nodded, apprehending what was next. “He and all his family have sworn allegiance to You-know-who. She meets regularly with him and a few other people in the dungeons. Most of them have well known death eaters in their family.”

Neville and Ginny were both looking at me and looking sorry. The latter patted my shoulder before wrapping her arm around my shoulders.

“We can’t let her know we’ve figured everything out,” she murmured. “I think it would be too dangerous.”

“I know.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I know.”

Neville shook his head, an irritating sympathetic look on his face, and he left without another word. Ginny was still just next to me; with everything that had happened, I was probably in for several months with her following me like my own shadow. That thought didn’t bother me at all.

“You know, Neville doesn’t really understand why you didn’t ask your family about all of this,” said Ginny after a few minutes spent in silence. “After all, with the rumours it’s legitimate. Is it because of this?”

“I wasn’t sure I could trust my mother to tell me the truth, and I didn’t ask my father for obvious reasons. As for the rest of my family, they are all suspected too.”

“I see,” she murmured. “I’m sorry Y/N, I didn’t find anything about them, just the proof that your father’s innocent. At least now, you’ll be able to ask your parents.”

I noded silently. After another few minutes, Ginny decided I had to change my mind and offered to follow her in the greenhouses. I first refused; couldn’t she let me get depressed on my own? But she insisted and I eventually gave up, secretly grateful that she hadn’t just left me alone.

I thought that with time, I had gotten used to the new Hogwarts, to the now omnipresent silence and darkness that crept in every corridor. It had been a while since the first of September, a time long enough to forget how joyful the place used to be. However, when we got to the main floor, where usually there were always several groups of students and even teachers no matter what time it was, it hit me harder than ever that the school was now like dead. As if it had been killed by all the evil that had invited itself.

“It’s scary, isn’t it?” I glanced at Ginny, wondering if she was thinking about the same thing as I was. “How everything seems physically darker than before,” she added. “In all honesty, I don’t know anymore what could save the castle… I thought that Dumbledore's Army was the solution, but let’s face it… We’re not changing anything here.”

“You’re wrong, many students are safe in the room of requirements thanks to Dumbledore’s Army. And think about the day Harry, Ron and Hermione will come back, think about how things will change!”

Ginny nodded with a smile and quietly thanked me. If it hadn’t sounded so cliché, I would have answered that she had done way more for me, and that all I wanted was her to be confident because I would have done anything for her. But it did sound very cliché, so I just shrugged it off.

“Funny how you just thought of my brother and his friend,” Ginny suddenly said with a malicious smile. “You are sure it had nothing to do with the fact that you’re in love with him?”

“What?” I exclaimed in disbelief. “Me? In love with Ron? Certainly not!”

“Then why are you always so excited to come with us for the holidays?”

Ginny seemed to be really amused by the situation, but I really wasn’t. She was right when she said that I was always overjoyed to spend some time at the Burrow but it wasn’t for Ron, I barely spoke with him! I wasn’t sure about the reason behind this excitement but it was definitely not her brother.

“I don’t know, but trust me, it’s not because of any of your brothers.”

“That’s too bad.” she stated, even though it didn’t really look like she was disappointed. “I still hope one day, you’ll be officially part of the family.” I laughed, and agreed with her. “You know what they say, as long as there’s life, there’s hope!”

“Yeah, well it looks like we won’t stay hopeful for long, then,” I mumbled as I was watching the empty corridor.

“You shouldn’t be so pessimistic, Y/N.” Ginny wasn’t smiling anymore, but she wasn’t looking defeated either. She was just determined. “We’re together, there’s inevitably hope. You and I, we’re two against the storm, and we have our friends and family. I’m not too afraid, and I don’t want you to be.”

“I’m not,” I smiled. “Not anymore. Ginny, I just wanted you to know that… As long as you need me, I won’t fall.”

She grabbed my hand and smiled.

“I’ll always need you.”

“Then I’ll never fall.”

#dev's2kwritingchallenge #Harry Potter #harry potter imagine #harry potter imagines #Ginny Weasley #ginny weasley imagine #ginny weasley x y/n #ginny weasley x reader #ginny weasley x you

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bubsdolan · 3 years

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grays long distance girlfriend suprsing him for new years 🥺🥺

when grayson made the last minute decision to fly home to new jersey just days before new years, it throw a spanner in the works and your calendar. you were blinded with the sudden change, yet supported your boyfriend wholeheartedly as you knew he needed to be home and free more than anything. however, it meant your time zones were now pushed further apart and meant it would be a struggle to head into the new year with one another, even over the phone. a whole 24 hours apart to be exact.

you couldn’t bare the thought of starting a new year without the one person who got you through the last. you had been away from grayson for many more months then you liked to think about, and you knew you wouldn’t be happy until your were back in grayson’s arms. and that’s exactly why you booked the earliest one way ticket to jersey, no matter the price. your bags where packed, your nerves at an all time high, but you felt the happiest and most excited you had been all year.

the time difference made it easy for you to travel the long distance from your home town to jersey without grayson getting suspicious at your absence online. when he didn't hear from you hours on end, he assumed you were either sleeping, working or busy and would message him when you found the time. he never once pushed for constant communication on the days you were apart, as he always wanted you to put yourself and your everyday life before him- although that was never the case, he came first, always.

you had messaged lisa prior to your flight, sending her over all the flight information and the plan to surprise grayson, before boarding and saying you couldnt wait to see her. lisa of course, was more than welcoming to have you back in her home, excited for her youngest son to be surrounded by the woman he loved as much as her, when she needed him the most. lisa knew grayson needed you by his side now more than ever, and by your small surpirse, she knew you were the one for grayson. he had found his soulmate.

the time had finally arrived when your fight had landed in graysons home town, a place you were felt ready to settle down in and start and raise your family. jersey was a home away from home, a big part of graysons life, which quickly turned into a very much a big part of yours. your heart belonged whoever grayson dolan was, and right now, that was jersey.

lisa had told grayson she had a few work related bits to take care of back at the salon before the year ended and would therefore be gone for the next couple of hours or so. something grayson never once questioned, kissing his mother on the forehead before biding her a goodbye and a safe journey. in his mind, grayson was going to spend the time he had alone doing absolutely nothing, which was the soul purpose of his sudden trip. he couldn't however get over the thought of you not texting, or even calling him.

he longed to speak to you, wished to hear your voice and stare into your hypnotising eyes- even through a phone screen. the clock was courting down to New years, only 2 hours left and grayson was yet to speak to you. something that send his mind spiralling and an sickening feeling in his stomach. he hoped you were ok.

“y/n! its so good to see your darling, how was your flight?”

lisa pulls you into a bone crushing hug, instantly calming your neveres and helping to make you feel that little bit closer to grayson before you finally reunited. you and lisa indluge in a heavy catch up the entire ride home, a lot of laughs, cries and girly chat that was much needed- more specifically on lisa’s end. she was happy to finally have some female company around, but she was more excited at the fact grayson would finally quit feeling sorry for himself at the fact you were so far part. as much as lisa loved having her son safe and home, there was only so much she could listen to him whine about missing his girlfriend or even twin brother. at least one out of those two would shut him up for now.

lisa walks into the house first, with you trailing closely behind, calling out for grayson to stop whatever he was doing and to meet her in the living room. only ten minutes to go until the clock strikes midnight and you welcome the new year in with the love of your life- but first before the tears of joy and abundance of new years kisses, you needed to make your presence known.

when you finally laid eyes on your boyfriend, dressed in sweatpants and an oversized blue checkered flannel, his mop of hair significantly grown since the last time you saw him in person, his eyes as captivating as ever, you felt like it was your first time meeting him all over again. you still had the same smile on your face, blushed cheeks and butterflies in your stomach, that you did the very first time you ever locked eyes with him. grayson dolan still had the same effect on you, a year later.

“hey, ma. how was work? did you get everything finished?” grayson pulled his mum into a hug, a huge mamas boy who thrived off psychical touch when talking to his loved ones. it felt nice to have someone to hug, to be there for him and comfort him in his hours of need. as the mother and son embrace, warming your heart and debating whether to ruin the moment, you decide it was the perfect opportunity to sneak in behind grayson and wrap your arms tightly around him. his frame a lot larger than yours, that it had you on your tiptops to reach him.

“what the fuck-” grayson immediately retracted himself from his mum, getting the fright of his life as he panicked at the sudden third party who happened to join them in their home. his mind firstly going to the hope it was ethan surprising him for new years, but as he turns around and comes face to face with the face hes been dreaming about, it was better than anything he could have imagined.

grayson broke down into a fit of sobs, falling straight to his knees, and cried into his hands covering his face, as he couldn’t comprehend you being there. you surprised him minutes before midnight, on new years eve . you came back for him like you always promised.

“sweetheart- you’re here, you- what the fuck,” he manages to chokes out, still on his knees as you crunch down to join him, to meet his chocolate eyes after all this time. grayson reaches his arms out to touch you, to feel your delicate irreplaceable skin under his fingers. to smell you, to hold you, to love you.

3...

2...

1...

“happy new year, baby,” you say through your own floods tears. holding graysons face between your hands as you pull him in for a much needed kiss. your lips moulding with his perfectly, sparks flying from not only the celebrations happening all across the world, but your own celebration right here, the two of you together, for good. you’re both refusing to let go of one another until you desperately needed air.

before you pull away completely, bodies still slumped on the ground, grayson frozen in shock and surprise, you whisper against his lips a miracle. words that already made this new year the best one of graysons life, not even a full minute in.

“im ready to move to la, for good and to start my life with you. no more being apart, baby. this year is our year, me and you against the world”.

148 notes · View notes

arhvste · 4 years

Text

KUROO TETSURŌ - PERMANENT PLAN

➵ summary : ‘love’ a word with multiple meanings, given and taken in different forms and an untouched territory you’d always been frightened of. everyone’s temporary, so you didn’t need to know what love is anyway, but kuroo insists that he’s anything but momentary to you.

➵ genre : x reader - angst , fluff

➵ an : this was just a drabble that eventually became a fic, it’s something i’ve been playing around with in my drafts for a while but this was my personal perception of the world before someone showed me that the worlds a lot nicer when you see the glass half full rather than half empty and there are people who want you to be part of their permanent plan

➵ inspo : sincerity is scary - the 1975 - american money - BØRNS

Love.

The word the world seemed to revolve around. Such a trivial thing to you.

How could one rely on a single emotion so much? How could people find motivation to seek out a feeling that’s just meant to find you naturally and in it’s own time.

In a world with countless people, how could you be so sure you’d found ‘the one’? Surely there was always going to be someone who’d be a better match for you somewhere else.

How bothersome.

You’d watched friends insist they’d found their ‘one’ only for that to have been a lie a handful of months later when you’d get calls from them sobbing on the other end of the line.

Love seemed like an indescribable feeling to you. You were certain you’d never experienced it past family bonds and somewhat platonic bonds, but that was as far as your knowledge on the subject reached.

You were frightened of the feeling in all honesty. Untouched territory you’d refused and continually refuse to enter.

From the outside, love seemed like a good look to wear. People you knew insisted it was the best feeling in the world to become fond of a special someone, to experience all the clichè scenarios one could only read about in books. You had to admit, some of your friends wore it well. You saw a brighter side to them while they embraced the thrill of what they claimed was love. The world seemed a little more pleasant in their eyes during the time period they were going through the phases of these unexplored but seemingly exciting emotions.

That all came crashing down in a matter of time though. You’d seen it over and over again. The once praised and celebrated feeling suddenly unbelieved in and torn apart to shreds. The world dimmed a little darker than it was before and tears clouded visions.

The feeling of love then became distasteful to you. Not wanting to ever go through the shattering heart break you’d seen so many go through, you swore off long-term connections with the same people. Everyone had a time limit and in your head that was the safest option.

The plan you’d kept in action over the years was simple. Keep people at arms reach for a while and gradually let them slip off by themselves. Everyone was replaceable and everyone was temporary. The world moved on and so could you.

Over the years, your mindset slowly set in and people would come and go. Some would linger a little longer than other who’d sometimes disappear as quickly as they apperead. You didn’t mind though. That was what you wanted anyway. It was for the best.

Of course, the world will always throw a spanner in your personal works and this particular spanner the world had tossed your way came in the form of Kuroo Tetsurō, your neighbour and close enough friend of 3 years now.

Kuroo was someone who had been around longer than you seemed to keep others. He never questioned it, noticing signals that you weren’t the type to touch on emotions and feelings out loud, he let you get on with your life and was content with being kept just at arms reach to you.

For now he was anyway.

You didn’t go out of your way to talk to many people and people who you had previously called friends that now scrambled for meaningless small talk with you if you were unfortunate enough to run into them. The feeling of awkwardness wasn’t a personal favourite of yours, you often opted to stay close to Kuroo to avoid having to deal with forced conversations elsewhere.

You weren’t quite sure what it was about Kuroo that kept him in your life for a longer limit than others. Maybe he was a little more persistent than others. Or maybe he felt the need to stay on good terms with you since the two of you were neighbours and you’d already been introduced to his grandparents and father. There were various reasons you assumed were the conclusion as to why Kuroo hadn’t let you slip from his grip just yet, but you were always prepared for it to happen eventually after all, everyone is temporary and Kuroo Tetsurō was no exception.

Fridays were the days most people you knew would go out and let go of the stress pent up over the week just gone. To you, Fridays were a routine. You’d go to Kuroo’s house for dinner with his family and then yourself and Kuroo would head out to a field closeby and lay down a chequered blue and red blanket behind the hill that blocked out the city lights from the view over the farmland and talk for hours on end under the stars.

The scenario itself could be seen as romantic perhaps, but to you, it was nothing more than de-stressing with a friend. You had a right to let out all the built up frustration the same way everyone else did, you just did it in a different way.

Today was a Friday and you were glad. Glad you’d have two days off from cramming pieces of information you were almost certain you’d forget and never need to use again after exams. Glad you didn’t have to watch one of your friends whine about her ex boyfriend's new girlfriend. Glad you were going to be able to voice out these silenced thoughts that had formed and bothered you all week and receive no judgement for it.

“Ready?”

Kuroo was leaning against your locker like he would everyday when you’d walk home together.

“Yeah.” You hummed as he took his place beside you as the two of you strolled back to your neighbourhood.

Conversations on the walk back home always consisted of Kuroo telling you about training. Various stories about members on his team were retold to you and he’d always make sure to tell you every detail. You’d always listen and give input when he asked or given clear signs of implication he wanted it. That was something you liked about Kuroo.

You were transparent enough with each other.

Both of you were able to read the others behaviour well and knew what the other wanted. Kuroo was able to read you emotionally well and you hadn’t even realised it until this year. He always respected your feelings and situations regarding other people. He never once questioned your morals or ties with others and left you to your own devices. Sometimes, he’d test the waters a little and try to see if he could perhaps get something out of you.

Any sign that you would open up to him a little more, let him in a little more, anything he could get a grasp of. He’d always stop when he knew he had gotten as close as he could get to you. He never tried to pry the doors of your life open but instead waited patiently outside the door and would wait for it to slowly creak open every so often but still never taking it upon himself to increase the gap in the door when a crack was opened and letting himself in.

You appreciated that about him.

A part of you wished you could open the door a little more for him, but Kuroo Tetsurō was not an exception to your life and you’ve had to remind yourself of that a little more often in the recent days.

By the time you’d reached the Kuroo residence, he’d told you an amusing story regarding his best friend Kenma and teammate Lev who you knew was a first year. According to Kuroo, Kenma had been given the task to help Lev out a little more in training much to his demise. You found the story ironic given that Kenma had been unenthusiastic about the sport until recently he seemed to be a little more willingly involved.

You had assumed this was because the National Spring Tournament was approaching fast and this would be Kuroo’s last chance as a highschooler to attend and go far in the competition. To you it looked like Kenma was preparing to move on ready to acknowledge that Kuroo wouldn’t be competing alongside him next year. He wanted to make Kuroo’s last year worth it and even though Kenma hadn’t admitted it out loud, you knew enough about both his and Kuroo’s friendship to know that it ran deep and unspoken promises were constantly fulfilled in their tight bond. They had the type of bond you had previously wished to contain with someone a few years back but that desire was nowhere near as present these days.

Still, that didn’t mean the burning yearn had completely been extinguished yet. A small flickering flame was still alive deep inside of you, you just refused to ignite it further.

“Yeah, Kenma wasn’t thrilled with the new responsibility he’s been given but he’s still doing it and I know he’ll actually try to help Lev in his own way.”

“I’m sure he will Tetsurō.”

At this point, Kuroo was unlocking his front door as he concluded his story. A few more seconds of his messing with his keys and the door opened. He pulled the silver key out and stepped out the way to let you in first, bowing slightly as he did so.

“God you’re so pretentious.” You hummed as he snickered behind you and closed the door once the two of you had stopped inside and been welcomed by the smell of cooking food.

“Tetsu, Y/N! Is that you two?” a shrill but somewhat soft voice rung from the kitchen.

“No, it’s some thieves who are about to ransack your house!” Kuroo teasingly called back as his grandmother scoffed at him emerging from the kitchen doorway.

“Well, aren’t you just the stand up comedian today.”

You laughed and smiled at his grandmother whose face brightened as she caught sight of your face.

“Ah, Y/N! How was your day my dear? I’ve made you your favourite tonight so I hope you’re hungry.”

The older woman approached you as you nodded and smiled.

“I’m always hungry when it comes to your cooking.”

“Flattery will get you anywhere Y/N.”

“It’s not flattery, it's genuine.” you shot back at the older woman who only chuckled and wandered back to the kitchen.

“Didn’t know you knew what the word ‘genuine’ meant.” Kuroo casually said as if he hadn’t just exposed something so raw about you.

“What’s that meant to mean?” you quickly replied, irritation filling your senses.

Kuroo saw this and immediately surrendered. He’d already gotten too close to the line and you hadn’t even sat down for dinner yet.

“Nothing, nothing, just ignore me.” His tone stitched with the thinnest threads of guilt.

You frowned at him slightly but let it go. There was no point in getting so easily worked up especially when you knew the boy meant no malicious harm.

“Come on, let’s go up to my room for a bit, dinner won’t be ready for another 15 minutes I’m going to assume.”

You nodded and grabbed your bag to bring up to Kuroo’s room.

You liked Kuroo’s room, it was very; him.

It was clean but a small clutter of papers and books were piled and scattered along his desk. It amused you that his work area seemed to be the only chaotic section in his room. He was academically organised but his desk would tell you another story. That was just his work process you supposed, so you never brought it up to him. A bed with plain white sheets dominated the most space in his room and a stuffed dog sat at the centre of two pillows.

When you had entered Kuroo’s room for the first time a few years back, he immediately insisted that the stuffed toy was a childhood gift he’d grown attached to and he simply couldn’t throw it away. You smiled thinking about the sentimental side Kuroo carried and didn’t seem to mind expressing. He was very family orientated and liked things with meaning behind them. His stuffed dog ‘Chow’ (Kuroo had told you the toy’s name was a reference to his favourite childhood film ‘Cars’ as he would often repeat the iconic phrase “Kachow” when he was younger although the cogs in his brain were a little smaller back then, only being able to pick out the “chow” part of the catchphrase.), lived in the exact same spot at the top of the bed and between two pillows and Kuroo never failed to leave him there after making his bed every morning.

It was the little details like this that made Kuroo a little more interesting to you. Perhaps that was one of the reasons you didn’t mind him enduring his time with you a little longer than you usually allowed others to. He didn’t mind sharing little facts with you and was always open for you to read. He never went out of his way to hide things from you and always made sure the two of you were on the same page.

You placed your bag down on the floor, left side of his bedroom door as you always did and sat down on the bed. The mattress dipped as Kuroo’s weight followed after yours. He leaned over and grabbed his TV remote from his bedside table and switched it on to scroll through the various saved programmes the two of you would watch together. It was an unspoken rule that Kuroo wasn’t allowed to watch certain series or documentaries without you and he followed this rule obediently even though neither of you had voiced it out.

Instinctively, Kuroo selected the series the two of you were currently watching together. ‘Your Lie in April’ seemed like a good choice at first but Kuroo soon found that it was a lot more emotional than you had first anticipated. You usually kept your emotions in check and hardly let them show past brief happiness. Kuroo would observe that you always just seemed content. Not particularly happy but not sad either. You just seemed to ease your way through life and take each day as it comes. ‘Your Lie in April’ seemed to bring out a soft twinkle in your eye as particular scenes triggered something within you. A few days ago, you had told Kuroo the series was boring and you wanted to watch something else, he wouldn’t allow that though. He told you that you had started it so now you had to finish it regardless whether it was good or not. He liked to finish something properly and you had no choice but to understand that. His real intention was to see that unusual twinkle in your eyes a little more often. He hadn’t figured out quite what it was or what it meant yet but something seemed to be trying to break out, you just wouldn’t let it. He knew you had inner emotions, but when he’d been deprived from seeing them by you, he was desperate to witness any emotion that wasn’t your usually appeased aura.

“Tetsu, I told you this is boring!” you whined as the two of you sit back and let the intro play.

“And I told you we have to finish it! I want to know if Kosei and Kaori ever perform together!”

“You’re such a sap ew.”

Kuroo laughed and poked your side as the episode finally began to play. The two of you sat in silence as you focused on the screen. Kuroo would have to admit his attention was a little more on you than the TV but he couldn’t help it. The flicker in your eyes was back and Kuroo noticed that it would reappear in the more emotional scenes with the main protagonist. Maybe you related to the main character. He seemed pretty content with just getting on with his own life. He didn’t seem particularly happy or sad either until the girl, Kaori came into his life.

Kuroo liked to think he was your Kaori; without the dying part of course. He could only hope that he brought a little more light into your life even though you seemed to prefer the dim brightness. It didn’t matter to him though, he was just grateful you’d kept him around for as long as you had. He wasn’t stupid, he knew you had a tendacy to let people drift in and out of your life, not letting them stay long enough to make an impact. He was certain he had some sort of impact on you though. After all, you had been coming over to his house every Friday for 2 years now and you never once cancelled or complained.

He was sure that this tradition had been engraved into your life and he had made some sort of change to your routine. He didn’t need affirmation from you, he knew he had you somewhat hooked onto him the same way he had hooked onto you. Neither of you spoke about it though. The unspoken and lingering feeling of relying on each other was definitely present but neither you or Kuroo seemed to approach it head on and confront it.

That was okay though. As long as he knew that you could rely on him to at least keep you at the surface rather than letting you fall and drown into an empty pit you seemed to have been digging for yourself, he was okay with that.

After around 20 minutes, the two of you were called down to dinner. Kuroo paused the episode and switched the TV off before waiting for you to shuffle off the bed. The two of you headed downstairs to the dining room, elbows bumping into each other, Kuroo had a soft smile on his face as you playfully nudged each other down the stairs.

Kuroo’s grandparents were already sitting down and Kuroo’s father was just walking in at the same time. You smiled at his father and thanked him for having you, to which he only laughed.

“You don’t need to keep thanking me Y/N, you’re practically family now!”

Family huh?

While Kuroo’s father probably didn’t mean to stir inner conflict in you, he did. The statement sent waves through your system as you tried not to overthink it. Did they really see you as family? How were they going to feel when you’d eventually disintegrate from their daily lives? Would they be mad at you or would they not care?

It didn’t matter anyway. The same way everyone was replaceable to you, you were replaceable to them. You were certain Kuroo would eventually forget about you too, maybe even find someone better to spend his time with and give his undivided attention to. The feeling of rejection stung ever so slightly but it confused you at the same time. The whole reason you kept people at a distance from you was because you never wanted to feel the effects of rejection. So why was it starting to hurt now? You weren’t romantically involved with Kuroo and nor had you snuck out of his life just yet. He hadn’t replaced you and hadn’t given you any implications on doing so ever. So why was the feared feeling beginning to surface?

You did your best to shove down your growing concern throughout your meal. Talking and laughing with Kuroo and his family whilst you ate. Everything seemed okay and you thought you were doing a good job of compressing the unwanted affects your thoughts were giving you. Things went smoothly and you seemed normal on the exterior but Kuroo was a perceptive person and could tell throughout the whole meal that you were in battle with yourself. He kept quiet for the time being though and let you keep up your act a little longer. He’d confront you about it later when there were no other distractions or ears other than his for your voice to reach.

You thanked Kuroo’s grandmother for the meal and helped clean up the table and kitchen as you usually would. Kuroo’s grandmother would wash the dishes while you and Kuroo would dry them and put them away. He’d reach the shelves your smaller form couldn’t reach. “Teamwork makes the dreamwork!” He’d declare every week resulting in your eyes to roll and a sigh to leave your lips. “This is hardly teamwork, I can do it myself.”

Kuroo smirked and shook his head. “With the assistance of a chair perhaps but why go to those lengths when you’ve got a perfectly strong, tall and capable man here to do it for you instead?”

Kuroo’s grandmother would snort and make a witty comment back to Kuroo teasing him for his perception of himself and Kuroo would find himself with no reply as he had got his own wit from his grandmother and there was no answering back when it came to her.

20 minutes of cleaning would always go by fast and the kitchen would be back to it’s homely but immaculate state as the three of you worked efficiently.

“The blankets under the stairs in the cabinet, I washed it a few days ago so it should be clean.”

You thanked the older woman and Kuroo pressed a soft kiss to her cheek in appreciation. You snickered and teased Kuroo for being a Grandma’s boy but he’d only shrug and ask if you could blame him. You couldn’t in all honesty. His grandmother had been close to him and she always gave Kuroo the support and tenderness his actual mother couldn’t. She was a perfect substitute and Kuroo would probably claim that he was raised in the best way possible even if his family wasn’t exactly the typical cookie cutter family dynamic that others had.

You’d have to agree with him as you saw no faults in their family. His family figures had in fact done a good job of raising Kuroo right and they had every right to be proud of him and the way he’d turned out. You even felt a sense of pride when you thought about him. You’d never voice it though, never admitting to growing somewhat attached to the boy you’d never allow yourself to acknowledge it. You were not to keep anyone closer than arms length to you and Kuroo Tetsurō was no exception.

You and Kuroo padded up the stairs to his room where he tossed an oversized jumper in your direction. Your blazer wouldn’t suffice as protection from the cold and it was a pain to carry a coat to school as the days were warm, it was only in the evenings the temperature decreased.

He shrugged one of his own jumpers on as you followed suit. The slightly frayed ends reached past your fingertips as you brought them close to your face. It was clear this time, Kuroo had lent you a jumper he had shown a little extra love to. He must’ve worn this one more than the others and the strong natural and comforting smell of him lingering in the threads of the fabric only proved your hypothesis further.

Kuroo made his way over to you and took your sleeves into his hands and he rolled them up a little. Just enough for your fingers to peak out so you could use your hands without excessive material getting in the way. The small gesture was another thing Kuroo never failed to complete every week either. He’d always make sure your fingers peaked out his hoodies at least a little to prevent you from losing grip onto anything. He also liked the way your warm fingers would brush up against his as the two of you would walk next to each other. It was almost like your hands were teasing him to hold them. He’d thought about taking your hands and intertwining your fingers together as you’d walk over behind his house and into the field where you’d always sit in the same spot and just talk about anything and everything that came to mind. He had restraint himself from doing so however. He wasn’t sure if you would be comfortable with that and the last thing Kuroo wanted to do was drive you away or worse yet, have you cast him out further than you already kept him. For now, he’d just have to put up with you unintentionally testing his patience.

You had been walking, soft hums of passing vehicles in the background as the city lived on through the night. The sounds became more distant as the two of you trekked further away from the urban area and deeper into the more rural territory.

The hill the two of you would always sit behind came clearer to your vision as you approached it and walked around it rather than over it. You had previously told Kuroo you were not going to make the effort to hike over it and Kuroo just laughed and deemed you lazy despite the fact he had no intention of ever making the journey over the mound of land himself.

After striding through the grassy land, the two of you had made it to your spot. A green patch of grass that hid the lights of Tokyo behind you and gave you a clear vision of the stars littered above your heads. Kuroo laid the blanket down as you both took your seats on the ground as you let out a sigh.

Conversation would naturally flow between you during these hours, whatever came to mind was spoken and neither one of you would hand judgment for what was said between you. Kuroo watched as you still handled the inner conflict that had struck up inside of you earlier. While you assumed you were doing a good job of concealing your slight stress, Kuroo noticed you seemed a little less focused and more immersed in the world of your own. You hadn’t even noticed that he was staring and observing you and you mindlessly tried to witter on about something that had happened in class. You sighed and looked up the stars, a peaceful silence blanketing over the two of you. Kuroo was yet to bring up his observations of your behaviour but decided that now wasn’t the right time as he anticipated your next words.

You both tilted your heads up to the sky as the stars glittered contrasting the dark night sky.

“Do you ever consider that we’re like the stars Tetsu?” You softly spoke as neither of you tore your eyes away from the view above.

“In what sense?” he murmured back, not daring to look at you.

“In the sense of they're just scattered. They’re aimlessly placed and compete with each other to shine the brightest. People are just like that too.”

Kuroo hummed and angled his head to catch sight of your soft eyes momentarily. “Explain.”

You exhaled and closed your eyes briefly.

“No obvious place in life, just thrown into things and have to make their own way from there. Regarding the competition as to which star can shine the brightest, people compete in the world of hierarchy and often strive to be the best in their industry and shine the brightest for others to admire.”

Kuroo sat up properly and turned his gaze in your direction. You noticed this and looked back into his eyes that seemed to be figuring something out. A moment of silence was left between the two of you as Kuroo thought about your perception.

“But,” he began, eyes never once losing focus on yours. “Have you ever considered that a lot of these stars are contributes to constellations?” He contrasted against your point as you raised an eyebrow.

“Each star in a constellation is connected to another building a small community of stars together, some may not be as bright as others but they’re always there no matter how dim they can be. ‘Draco’ wouldn’t be ‘Draco’ if there was a star missing would it? Each star holds a purpose even if it doesn't shine the brightest.”

You didn’t miss the way Kuroo’s eyes desperately searched yours. He was looking for any signs of misunderstandment or confusion as he continued his point.

“So, I think yes you’re right about people being like stars, just in a different way to what you think. Everyone has connections and is part of some sort of community like the stars are and even if they don’t shine the brightest, people are always there to support and connect with you even if it may not seem obvious.”

Kuroo’s point seemed more like a personal examination and answer for you. He had figured you out and you hadn’t even realised till now. Did he know this whole time you had people so casually passing through your life? Was he aware that you were expecting the same thing to happen to him? You had no idea and you didn’t know if you wanted to know either. Perhaps he’d be mad at you for not making your intentions as clear as you thought you should’ve or maybe he wouldn’t care at all and he’d obliged and let you be part of his temporary plan as you had been on everyone else's.

“I know Y/N. You’re not exactly good at being deceptive, well; when it comes to me anyway.”

You desperately tried to think of an excuse.

Why wasn’t he laughing or mocking you for being so detached? Surely he must’ve thought you were a waste of time now so why wasn’t he showing signs of annoyance or anger.

“K-Kuroo -I”

“-Kuroo? I thought I was Tetsu. You can’t just back out now that I’ve figured you out!”

His voice had a tone of hurt and if you weren't so focused on him and his actions right now, you may have missed it. But you didn’t.

“No! No, it’s not like that it’s just- You, no-” You couldn’t think of anything to say to him. What could you even say to someone who had read you like an open book and done their thorough research on it. There was nothing you could say other than the truth now and you both knew this.

“Take your time, I’m not going anywhere.” His hand inched closer to yours as a calming expression met your own.

You inhaled and exhaled and cleared your head slightly.

“I’m only temporary, why do you care so much?”

There it was.

Your true feelings towards the situation and the people around you. But Kuroo wasn’t like the people around you so why was it hard to tell him? Then again, he was to be treated like everyone else in your life had been, as Kuroo Tetsurō was no exception.

“Who says you’re temporary?” Kuroo’s eyes widened as worry and regret washed over you. He had a sympathetic look to him and had a sense of sadness of his own. Did you really just think you were temporary to him? Did you think that way towards everyone?

He was prepared to confront you, expected you to tell him that you just fell out with people easily. He had no idea of the weight of the burden you carried and he certainly didn’t like you felt this way and let yourself be weighed down by it.

“Thats just the way it is.” your voice barely above as whisper as Kuroo looked at you with disbelief. He shook his head. His hand begging him to let it interlock with yours. He held off just a little longer. You were vulnerable and he refused to take advantage of that no matter how small the gesture seemed.

“Why? Why are things that way? Who told you they have to be that way?” his voice calm and collected with small pitches of sadness as he practically begged you to give him an answer. Maybe he hadn’t made as big an impact on you than he initially thought. Maybe he was wrong this whole time about what he was and was hoping to be to you. God, this hurt him just as much.

You shuddered and shook your head at the boy.

“I don’t want to know what love is. I don’t want to risk the aftermath of rejection. I’m scared Tetsurō. I’m so so scared.” A vulnerable look replaced the usual bored look in your eyes. Kuroo watched the way your fingertips gripped the edges of his jumper and the way you cast your gaze down. He didn’t like it one bit. Why did you feel like that? Had you been hurt before unbeknownst to his knowledge? He thought he knew you inside and out.

“Love...it’s scary yes but it’s exciting too. It’s unexplainable Y/N, I couldn’t possibly give you an answer as to what it’s like. I do know,” he gestured for you to look up at him. “that you will experience it in some form at some point in your life. It’s inevitable. You shouldn’t feel frightened though. That’s what other people are for. They’ll be there to pick you back up and dust you off if things do go wrong. The same way the stars connect together, people are connected and you’ll always have people to rely on.”

Nothing but genuine emotion went into his words and you knew this. So why were you still trying to fight it?

Kuroo picked up on this and sighed. He didn’t know this was the reason you had avoided letting people in. The reason seemed somewhat confusing but he also saw your point at the same time. You lacked trust in yourself and that was something Kuroo wanted to give you if you weren’t going to give it to yourself.

“I-I’m sorry! This is stupid I should’ve just kept quiet. I bet you think I’m a waste of time oh god, I’m so sorry Tetsu, this is why I don’t let people get involved with me.” tears threatened to spill but you’d refuse to let them. You’d done so well up until now. Nobody suspected anything when you’d gradually drift away but life is never that generous to let things go your way all the time. Kuroo Tetsurō was an obstacle you couldn’t beat and sometimes in life you have to admit to defeat.

“God Y/N, you’re not temporary to anyone especially not me! I’m not mad at you I just wish you’d rely on me a little more. I want to be part of your constellation I just don’t know if you want me to be.”

Tears brimmed your vision a little more and you could barely speak but managed the next few words out.

“I’m only part of your temporary plan, we all move on eventually and you will too.”

“You’ve always been a part of my permanent plan. Always have been, always will be. I don’t care in what way, but I’ll always want you to be a part of my life. I never intended on letting you go no matter how much you wanted me to.”

Without even realising it, your hand had edged closer and closer to Kuroo’s and you could feel the warmth of his hand close to yours. Your breath hitched as you took a deep breath before Kuroo continued.

“I can’t promise you a life of no disruption, I mean you’ve seen how loud my laugh is and you’re the only one who puts up with my irritating provoking for so long.” You laughed at this. “But what I can promise you is lessons in love. Let me not only teach you but let you learn with me. I have little to no experience but I have some idea of how it’s meant to feel and I’m pretty sure it’s how I feel when I’m with you.”

You sighed. “What am I going to do with you?” you murmered closing your eyes. A soft smile gracing your lips. The first genuine smile you’d given him since leaving the house.

“Take me up on my offer and let me take care of you. We’ll take it slow but I want you to know it’s okay to trust others and let them in a little.”

You looked down and noticed Kuroo’s hand had enveloped over yours. You liked the feeling of his larger calloused hand over yours. It felt right. This felt right.

You were unexperienced and anxious for now. Territory untouched now so close to your feet, but Kuroo wanted to step into that territory not in front of you, but alongside hand-in-hand with you.

“Take good care of me from here on out then.”

Kuroo smiled and gave your hand a light squeeze and you leant in a little closer to him as the two of you sat under the seemingly aimless but connected stars.

You hadn’t let a lot of people into your life. Everyone stayed a few metres away from the door and they’d eventually leave after they never seemed to open. Kuroo had decided to wait and in the end it seemed worth it. The doors had opened for the first time and that’s what told you Kuroo Tetsurō was in fact an exception.

general taglist → @atsumuwoah @bloody-bella @bbymilkbread @miracleboy420 @doggonudez @atsunakaashi @peteunderoos @saturnfarie @toffees-main @zumisace @boosyboo9206 @totorosleaff @27kei

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#kuroo tetsuro #kuroo x reader #kuroo x you #kuroo fanfic #kuroo scenario #hq x reader #haikyuu x reader #hq #haikyuu #haikyuu!!#haikyuu scenario #kuroo fluff #kuroo angst #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu angst

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rayshippouuchiha · 3 years

Text

Prompt of sorts i guess?

Read the story ‘the family you choose by TunaFishChris’ good story set in ATLA but when I finished reading it my brain threw more plot bunnies at me. Help.

Same soulmates verse but its ozai not azulon who burns zukos off, azulon does have one but its on his head covered by hair n it was for his wife so when she dies azulon goes a little mad n as this was during ozais formulation years n while iroh is away its no surprise that ozai ends up like he does. Half natural inclination n half nurture or lack there of. Sozin was soulmates with roku, loosing him n being partly responsible got rid of any sanity he still had thus war n genocide with gusto. Ozai is the only born royal with no marks n sees it as a strength, zuko gets his down his spine for his soul family always having his back n such. Ozai nearly cripples zuko getting rid of them. Lala (is easier n faster to write) gets her marks when she is with zuko, zuko is always with her, mum told him that he was a big brother n that big brothers looked after their little siblings, zuko loves his little sister, he takes her everywhere. So when her mark appear he very quickly covers them, takes them to a discreet doc in town to get cover cream for her n starts teaching her to NEVER talk about them to anyone but him, not mother not father, no one. It works the cream n the where they appear on the body mean she is not found out by ozai. This changes alot. Once azulon gets his mind back after his wifes death he is tired of war but realises that no one will believe him wanting to end the war, he looks at his sons, iroh has too much blood on his hands n likes fighting too much to be the one to take over from him. Ozai is too cruel, twisted n power hungry for it to be him. Lu ten is promising but after talking with him (under the pretences of teaching him royal politics, laws n other things that the presumed heir would need to know) azulon discovers that lu ten does not want to rule and to force him to do so would only make him resent the throne. Lu ten suggests zuko instead, zuko loves the nation n the ppl, zuko is a naturally caring n protective person, zuko already sneaks out n mingles with citizens who can’t seem to help loving him, he just draws everyone in. Lu ten suggests having zuko (and lala if zuzu is there so is she) attend these lessons with azulon n Lu ten the excuse given to allow it is that zuko is to be trained to be Lu tens advisor when he is firelord. Its the other way round really but no one else needs to know that yet, zuko can be the lord, Lu ten n lala the advisors. Lu ten is the one keeps the farce going n keeps the target for assassination on his back rather than his little cousins. Lu ten is reported dead at ba sing se but is alive just so injured n with amnesia, possibly also damage to his chi so he can’t bend. Is picked up by the boulder who was an army soldier but leaves after that battle as he can’t stand to see that much blood anymore. Lu ten has soul marks but they hang on his skin like a very log hanging belt no one is going to notice them unless he gets naked. Growing up zuko n lala discover they r soul mates, lala is far more stable as she knows her brother will always love her no matter what she does n without conditions like father. She still is terrifying but she is loyal to zuko n only plays at being loyal to ozai. When Lu ten is reported dead n ozai makes a play for the throne azulon sees his chance n when says ozai must lose a son, he doesn’t want zuko dead, he plans to remove zuko from ozai family line register n either take him in as his own son or to have iroh take zuko in. Either way zuko was never going to die. Lala not knowing this is scared her only person will be taken from her goes to mother as even though mother doesn’t love her she loves zuko n will be willing to protect him, that done she goes n spends the night with zuko in case father sends assassins. Ursa makes the poison n gives it to ozai n then runs, it isn’t fatal poison she is hoping that ozai will mess up, azulon to survive but proof that ozai tried to kill him will see ozai either in prison till he dies or being executed for treason. Either way zuko is safe from his father n azulon can’t kill zuko as he will be the only remaining male heir, ozai dead, iroh too old to have more children n azula being too young n too female for most of the war counsellors to take seriously. Ozai adds something of his own to the poison, not completely trusting ursa (I wonder y) the poison ends up stimulating death long enough for azulon to be declared dead, ozai crowned n shit started. Azulons body is secreted away by a small group of loyal followers n his health slowly, very slowly returns, he is an OLD man even if the poison doesn’t kill him it does still kick his ass a bit. Ozai ups his campaign to get rid of zuko, lala quickly becomes VERY good at acting, manipulation n fighting to counter this n keep her dum dum alive, zuko becomes paranoid as hell but reaches new heights in stealth, weaponry n first aid. Lala is counting down the days till she has a valid excuse to kill ozai. Azulon is pissed as hell that he can’t do anything from where he is apart from try to help zuko as much as he can by sending ppl he trusts to teach him n look after him. Iroh comes back n really throws a spanner in the works, dismissing his fathers ppl from around zuko, in the (how many??) months that he is back before zuko is shipped out has the highest number of nearly successful assassination attempts on zuko since ursa left. Ozai is not impressed (that they failed), lala is adding uncles name to her shit list, azulon is just mystified as to how his son who is a supposedly great tactician can be so damn stupid.

Then the agni kai happens n azulon is too pissed off at ozai to care about iroh anymore. Azula is leaving with zuko “as otherwise his only example of fire bending will be uncle father n really even dum dum is better than that, besides then if zuko dishonours the family I can kill him straight away.” She has spent too long keeping him alive now for him to ruin all her efforts now. Zuko still has the same soul mates but also has the marks for Lu ten, azula n yue. Azula has zuko, toph n yue. Lu ten has zuko, azula n boulder at the least. Toph has azula added to her group. 6 months after zuko is banished azulon manages to find their location n reach them before they leave, takes over teaching them again n rips iroh several new ones while the crew watches in awe n horror. Azulon finds out about zukos marks n what ozai did n nearly sinks the ship in his rage, lala is glad to find someone else to help her keep zuko alive even if she doesn’t fully trust him, the only one who gets that treasure is zuko. With azulon backing his thoughts about stopping the war n to start helping the ppl of his nation zuko is different by the time aang gets freed, he n lala (im still coming with u dum dum) start working with the gaang earlier n things go smoother? The fire royals end up going to the northern city with them where they meet yue, she n azula bond, azula teaches her to be terrifying, azulon just watches n makes cutting remarks on how stupid the norths misogyny is n just how under prepared they r for anything really, the small fleet of their southern sisters tribe could lay seige, win n not loose more than maybe 5 ppl n they r all non benders. Water ppl being pissed that they can’t kill azulon due to him not being fire lord anymore n is just a doting grandfather really look at how harmless n unarmed I am, they have no claimable vendetta to excuse their killing him as lawful by tribe standards, as the tribe isolated itself n has had no real damage from azulon, also he has already been declared dead which is throwing them a little. Hahn being stupid enough to try n take azulon on, azulons bitch face is epic n lala vows to replicate it one day. Political marriage betrothal between yue n zuko? This azulon is a mix of grumpy old man, sarcastic little shit n im-too-fabulous-for-this attitude. When they find toph is also when they find boulder n Lu ten, zuko n azula bond with him n that breaks the amnesia n katara might be able to help heal his chi?

#ATLA #Prompt #Oh oh damn #that's good #submission

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girldirectionsource · 3 years

Note

hey!! could you recommend any long wlw fics?? preferably more than 70k words. thanks:)

Hi! Unfortunately, there aren’t that many longer girl direction fics but I do have two amazing ones to rec you that are both over 100k:

You Make Lovin’ Fun by @homosociallyyours

Harry is a 28 year old travel writer at a gay magazine who gets the assignment to go a lesbian cruise. She figures it's a nice chance to have some fun in the sun, but she's not expecting much else-- even if her partner and best friend are both encouraging her to hook up with someone while she's there.

When she locks eyes with a gorgeous silver fox from across the room, she starts to think she could've been wrong. There are lots of things standing in the way of anything real happening with her and Louis, but that doesn't stop them from falling for one another. True love isn't always easy, but they do make lovin' fun.

Crazy and Infectious by @star55

“Y’know,” Louis starts. “While we’ve got our phones out, you should give me your number. In case they ask who referred them.” “Oh, they don’t do that,” Harry replies as she locks her phone. “They’re not the kind of company who keeps tabs on who refers who.” Louis raises her eyebrows and smiles at this beautiful girl. “Harry,” she says slowly. “I’m hitting on you.”

A Shades of Pink story in which we flash back to find out just how Louis and Harry actually got together.

(If you haven’t read it yet, the entire Shades of Pink (Crazy in Love) series is over 400k at this point and I highly recommend checking it out!)

more under the cut!

And then here are some recs between 50k and 70k:

I love your demons (like devils can) by ariadne_odair

"I am right here," she says loudly, and she can almost hear the crack when Louis' head whips around to stare at her.

"Why?" Louis asks, and Harry feels her insides shrivel up and die.

Harry didn’t plan to join the football team. She didn’t plan to sleep with the captain of the football team. She definitely didn’t plan to sleep with the closeted captain of the football team, who promptly acted as if nothing happened and left Harry a pathetic, pining mess.

The Changer and the Changed by @homosociallyyours

It’s the spring of 1977 and Harry Styles has just moved to New York City after graduating college. She knows she’s a lesbian. She just needs to figure out how to meet other lesbians.

Louis Tomlinson works at a popular women’s bookstore in the Lower East Side, Womon’s Direction, where she spends her days reading feminist literature, writing poetry, exchanging friendly barbs with her boss Niall, and dreaming of finding someone to love.

When Harry and Louis meet, their connection is instantaneous. Slowly but surely, Louis welcomes Harry into her community of women. Stonewall veteran and old school butch Niall; Liam, a land dyke who’s moved to the city for love; and Zayn, a lesbian musician who’s been ostracized by a vocal part of women’s community for being trans, welcome Harry with open arms, ready to help her find her place in New York City’s bustling lesbian scene.

It’s a time of growth for everyone involved.

If I Was Stronger by @haloeverlasting

Harry’s fingers find her lips, in a silent moment of wonder and reverie, and her knees wobble as she’s assaulted with the image of Louis, right here in her bedroom, with her light blue eyes, and her gentle hands, and Harry feels an overwhelming rush and longing to reach out and touch. She imagines Louis stepping towards her slowly, treading lightly with her fingers on her cheek, where Harry’s dimple may appear, and whether Harry would like it if Louis’ thin lips found hers.

With her eyes closed, she imagines Louis standing very close, and she finds the wait to be agonizing, but when she goes to close the distance, there’s no one besides herself in her bedroom.

Harry lets out a breath she hadn’t even realized she’d been holding. She feels tingly, and hot, and absolutely terrified, but the next time she looks in the mirror, she sees someone she knows intimately. She sees that girl with bright green eyes, and unruly hair, and parted lips, and she loses her breath a moment, because while she knows that girl inside and out, she hasn’t been honest with herself until… well, now.

“I might be gay.”

A Girl Direction AU where Louis holds universes inside her, and Harry just wants to hold her.

That Smile and That Midnight Laugh by @uhoh-but-yeah-alright

Harry’s never noticed how lovely Louis really is. Maybe it’s just that she’s usually so guarded – a little tense, a little irritated, a little put out. At least when she’s at school, and also usually when she’s around Nick, which are the only times Harry has really seen her. Until tonight. Tonight Harry’s seen her with her guard completely down. Too busy laughing and enjoying herself to remember to be prickly, maybe. She seems different.

It feels different.

A Ferris Bueller's Day Off AU that picks up right where the movie leaves off, and imagines what might happen if Ferris' girlfriend and sister become friends. And maybe something more, too.

Sea Asunder by @cupcakentea

It’s only then, as Anne elegantly sits at the other end of the table, that Louis realises there’s a third set of cutlery and plate laid out on the side between them. She feels something twist in her belly, right when the sound of small heels coming closer echoes from the drawing room. She looks at Anne’s side, where the door she came from remains ajar. But she realises, as the steps slow down, that the one on hers is wide open. She feels the hair on her neck standing up slightly with what feels like a shift in the very atmosphere of the room. A gravitational pull that passes right by her side with no words, no sound, just a disturbance of the air. There she is.

A Portrait of a Lady on Fire AU

i must admit i thought i’d like to make you mine by @disgruntledkittenface

Louis fell apart when her ex broke up with her and moved across the country. Just as she’s starting to move on, Zayn comes back to town for their mutual friends’ wedding – with a new girlfriend as her plus one.

Blindsided and scrambling to save face, Louis lets herself get talked into a fake relationship with her new friend Harry. Their arrangement makes Louis feel pathetic and embarrassed, but it’s only going to last a few weeks. She just has to get through the wedding – what could happen?

And here some fics I found while putting this together that I haven’t read yet but which look good!

into the great wide open by @ficshl

It only took a week or so for Harry to truly get into the routine of life on the road. They woke before dawn each morning, ate a small meal, packed up the tent and rounded up the livestock, all before setting out. On a good day, they could make it twenty miles. There hadn’t been many bad ones, but Louis confessed that on a previous trip there had been a solid week where they hadn’t made it more than five miles a day. Soon, Louis promised, animals would start going lame, and wheels would start breaking, and people would start going hungry. The beginning was the easiest, and the end was doable only because the hope of finishing the trek fueled everyone. It was the middle bit, with the tedious marching hundreds of miles from any settlement, that people succumbed to the journey.

Safe and warm in your coat of arms by frenchkiss

If she's being completely honest with herself, Louis didn't want a girlfriend. She had fully intended to head off to university, fuck around a bit, and be the lesbian that her hometown hadn't let her be.

Too bad fate wanted to throw a spanner in the works. A tall, curly haired cherub of a spanner who tends to answer to the name Harry, to be exact.

Me, Her, And The Moon by star55

All Louis wants to do is survive secondary school and her A Levels, be the best sister that she can possibly be to her five sisters, and train as hard as possible to be her family’s future alpha. She doesn’t expect to meet her mate on the first day of school and have her entire world changed.

#i hope this is helpful!#50 to 60k #60 to 70k #100k+#Anonymous

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catboyelphaba · 3 years

Text

what’s this??? gelphie character references??? >:3

yeah! if you’re having trouble picturing them in my writing (or if my descriptions don’t really match up with how you see them in your own head), here’s just how I imagine they look (and how you can expect to see them described). (this also exists in case i forget some details) <3

Elphaba:

tall (like 6′2″ probably?)

lanky bby. stringbean. got that Library physique.

toned arms, still. she carries a lot of books around and it’s not like that’s not gonna build (or at least maintain) muscle

FANGS this is NON-NEGOTIABLE (and her other teeth are sharp, too)

a few freckles!!

do i. do i need to say that she’s green

i once read a fic where she blushed purple (instead of just darker green) and i’ve lived by that headcanon ever since

eye color is a whole spaghetti-tangle of genetic fuckery (and her lineage being. unique also throws another spanner in the works) but she’s got brown eyes w/ little gold flecks in them

*voice of god* behold! the holy no-tiddies mathematical expression: childhood neglect/malnutrition + a dubious-at-best ruling of afab (that’s canon, don’t come for me) + the metabolism of a hummingbird on speed + constantly walking around a big-ass college campus

i promise i’m not a creepy dude who writes about boobs all the time i’m just a trans guy and an escapist

sharp! elbows, knees, tongue, you name it

why the fuck does she lose her glasses after Popular that shit makes no sense. i wear glasses and will never get over this. anyways she’s blind as fuck without them and it’s safe to assume she’s wearing them whenever i write her

dark under-eye circles

i mean,,,,,, she’s a college student majoring in a STEM field like. what did u expect lmao

right-handed, but reasonably dexterous with her left as well

HOWEVER her handwriting ranges between “yeah i think i can read that?” and “fucking illegible” at any given time this girl has NO patience and her brain is faster than her hands by MILES

nose is a lil crooked (common symptom of Will-Fight-A-Bitch Syndrome)

scars

oh boy so many uhhhhh.

lots of common ones like knees/elbows from just Being a Kid

several in the wrist/forearm region, mostly from her teeth

most of the more serious ones are on her back. they’re shaped like buckles and sharp lines and the death-masks of flames and one of her favorite hobbies is not talking about them

two almost-identical ones on her right hip and shoulder that she legitimately does not know the origins of (literally no significance to this, just kind of funny)

short nails. she bites em when she’s nervous. whoops

glinda already waxes poetic about her hair in the book so i’ll leave it at that ;) only distinguishing characteristic i usually add is that it’s like. hella long. like waist-length at least

Glinda:

short!! tiny!! (like. 5′1″ max she is SMALL!!)

n chubby! aughhg my vision of glinda is just. so soft she makes me happy to think about. i’d love to get a hug from her any day of the week

teeth are a little crooked but in like. a charming way

fuck it, she has freckles too. more of them, b/c she doesn’t spend as much time inside as Elphaba does

pale as fuck; see above. doesn’t tan, just gets freckles (as a fellow pasty bitch i can relate)

this one’s kind of dumb to specify lmao she blushes like a normal person

two subtly-different blues in her eyes. it’s weird and it looks like a trick of the light at first but it lends her some mystery

i had a conversation with an online friend about this YEARS ago :,) i miss her... love you, olive, wherever you are...

it’s important to pay attention to her eyes in conversation. she might be acting dumb but she’s keyed IN. much sharper than a lot of people realize, or give her credit for

oh boy the boobie question. uhhh you guys know what? i’ll leave this one up to you, honestly it’s not v important to me

the round/soft to Elphaba’s angles <33 fuck i love that dynamic so much

probably needs glasses but would NEVER wear them. a lil squinty as a result, sometimes

actually gets the appropriate amount of sleep! good for her, honestly. charismatic enough that she can talk her way into extensions/out of missing assignments VERY easily to catch those extra Z’s

lefty!! (so she and Elphaba can hold hands without compromising their dexterity or whatever) her handwriting is really neat b/c she has to go slowly in order to not smudge the ink

so, naturally, Elphaba’s handwriting annoys the fuck out of her kjhgjfkdfsj (she can still read it with barely any trouble tho b/c she’s a fucking simp i don’t make the rules) (oh wait. i do.)

misc. facial features

cute lil nose!

OH MY GOD SHE HAS DIMPLES I ALMOST FORGOT

pierced ears, naturally

no scars, surprisingly. she was a cautious kid

nails aren’t long, but are well-maintained

her hair is like. ungodly soft. v shiny, naturally curly, just as bouncy and sunshiny as she is <333

she’s just such a ball of positivity??? i lov,,,,,, she,,,,,

#hc #elphaba #glinda #gelphie #sort of #character refs

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ijustwant2write · 4 years

Text

Not Your Girl Anymore-Tommy Shelby x Reader

(GIF credit to @hvproductions)

Tags: @amirahiddleston @bloodorangemoonlight @captivatedbycillianmurphy

Requested by @jaspersthebomb: 'Hey could you do one where her and tommy are still together after the war but drifting apart and then he dumps her for grace and she finds out that she’s pregnant with Tommy’s kid and you can decide how it ends'

Characters: Tommy Shelby x Reader

Meanings: (Y/N) =Your name

(Y/L/N)=Your last name

Warnings: Swearing, arguing, divorce, cheating, smut, alcohol abuse, fluff

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I sighed as I dried up another plate, tempted to throw it at the wall, but settled on placing it back in the cupboard. He still wasn't back, though I didn't understand why I was still surprised by that. I couldn't remember the last time he was home at a normal time, or when he had a good enough excuse. I would have been fine with him dealing with business if he didn't treat me like a piece of shit.

I glanced at the kettle, telling myself that I should really have a cup of tea. But why should I abide to society's rules when Tommy certainly wasn't. I went for the good whiskey, Tommy's favourite, pouring myself a glass, then another once I swigged it back. The bottle was soon becoming empty when Tommy decided to come home. I turned around in the chair, watching as he ignored me and made his way up the stairs.

"So you won't even stop to say hello anymore?" I slurred, not caring how drunk I sounded.

He cleared his throat."I'm not going to speak to you whilst you're like this."

"Well when will you talk to me?" I stumbled towards the stairs, l leaning against the bannister."Is this what it takes to get your attention?"

He stopped halfway up the stairs, leaning his head back as he groaned."Right, come on."

Just as I thought he was going to take care of me, he grabbed me by my elbow, practically dragging me up the stairs. I complained as I tried to not trip. This just confirmed it for me. If I wasn't drunk, I wouldn't have fought this, I would have kept quiet, maybe made a snappy remark; but seeing as I was drunk, words slipped out before I could even think about them.

"Ever since the fucking war, you've hated me." I whined, a lump forming in my throat.

He didn't respond.

"I know you saw a lot, I know you went through so many terrible things. But why do you hate me? What did I do to make this marriage fall apart?"

"You're drunk, you won't remember this in the morning." Tommy huffed, laying me down on the bed.

"I will. I always remember when you upset me."

Tommy said nothing, leaving the room. I did remember what he said to me, I remembered everything since he came back to me. I called him my hero. Such a brave man who fought for his country. Now all I had was a corrupt, mean man in my house... his house.

Another week had gone, meaning another week of having to pretend I didn't have a husband. I had time to really think about what I wanted, where I wanted this relationship to go. I married a different man before the war, but that's what every woman was saying. Part of me felt terrible for being mad at him, Tommy (like a majority of men) hadn't spoke of what happened, which was understandable, but I had wanted him to say something to me, something that showed me he was still human. Though I never got it.

Once again, Tommy came home late in the evening. I was surprised when he stopped by the kitchen, actually coming to see me. Neither of us said anything, Tommy breaking the silence by clearing his throat.

"How have you been?" he started.

"How have I been? We've hardly spoken all week and that's what you say to me?"

"Well, just as you said, I've been neglectful."

"You've just made a statement but it has driven this conversation no where."

He lit a cigarette."That's all I seem to do nowadays. Never been good at conversation."

"You were with me." I mumbled.

He grunted as a response.

"Those were the days, eh?"

He moved towards me, inhaling his cigeratte before exhaling near my face. I didn't move away."You really miss them, don't you?"

"Miss my husband being present in my life? Yes, funny that."

The corner of his lip twitched."You haven't lost your temper."

"Someone had to stay put."

"Don't fight me."

"That's all we're doing anyway Tommy."

He got closer, his body now against mine, so close I could smell the usual scent of whiskey and cigarettes on him. I took the cigarette, taking a drag myself before putting it out in a cold cup of tea.

"Have we really changed that much?"

"You shouldn't have to ask that question."

His eyes cast down to his hands, which were currently unbuttoning my blouse. Although there was an urge in me that wanted him to stop, to prove that he was an awful husband, there was an even bigger part of me longing for his touch after being starved of attention for so long. I looked over his face, still taken back by how blue his eyes were. The trance was broke as he pushed my blouse off me, leaning in to kiss me hard. My hands instantly wrapped around his neck, gripping the bottom of his hair. There was a horrible, twisting knot forming in my stomach, and it wasn't lust or a build up of pleasure, it was the wonder of would this be our last intimate moment together? Could this be testing whether our love was still alive for each other?

I yelped as his hands ruffled up my skirt, and I quickly unbuckled his trousers, going to reach down when Tommy pushed me harshly into the coutertop. Ignoring that pain in my back, I moaned as he quickly entered me, his pace already fast and rough. Gripping onto his shoulders, I tried to keep myself steady. But what I thought would give me hope, fill me with pleasure, was the exact opposite. He wasn't making love to me. He was just fucking me like some whore he got from the streets.

I really tried to enjoy it, to feel something, or at least pretend he was having sex with me because he loved me; but as soon as it had began, it was over. He let out a deep moan, short of breath as he thrusted into me one last time. As he got his breath back, my face was emotionless, the arms that once tightly held onto him now limp, no longer wanting to be near him. I refrained from making a nice as he pulled out of me, shamelessly pulling down my skirt. But what made me freeze was how he simply did up his trousers and walked away. I had had enough.

Picking up a plate, I threw it with all my might at him, missing his head by a fraction."Fuck you Thomas Shelby!"

That had been the last time I saw Tommy. Well, lived with him at least. I couldn't stand to be in the house any longer, even if he never showed up. However, it was hard to get around Small Heath without someone even mentioning him. I stayed with a friend of mine, Fran, who thankfully took me in. She too didn't give a shit about Tommy.

"Come on then," I huffed as Fran kept pushing around the food on her plate,"tell me."

Her eyes darted up to mine, almost as if I scared her."What?"

"He was with her again today, wasn't he?"

She hesitated."Yes. She's working at the Garrison still."

"Not even divorced and he's still going after her."

"You're not upset?"

"I'm upset that he doesn't have the respect to come and tell me he's in love with her. I would go and tell him I want a divorce, but I still think I would punch him in the face."

"I don't see the problem with that."

We laughed."I don't want to be the bitch of a wife. I want it done properly so he can't hold anything against me."

"What if I punched him?"

"You can take that risk. He is still leader of the Peaky Blinders."

"Never stopped me before."

The next morning, I got up early, though I hadn't actually had a choice in that. I had awoken to the sick feeling in my stomach that had been there for the past two weeks. Fran somehow hadn't heard me throwing up whatever was left in my stomach, but that worked to my advantage. It was obvious I was pregnant, but I shocked myself when I felt no fear. It may have been Tommy's child, but it wouldn't have the life he would intend for it. I had always wanted children, Tommy used to until he came back from war. He wasn't against it, he just never had time to even think of it. Although it seemed like bad timing for me, I was still having this child, raising them incredibly; and by God I was going to be an amazing mother. Besides, he had a new woman to think about, even if he didn't have the decency to tell me.

Once I was ready, dressed in my smartest clothes, makeup and hair fully done, I headed downstairs, grabbing my briefcase and headed to the betting shop. There was only one way I was going to get through to Tommy. As I entered the shop, heads turned, wondering why the Mrs was here and where she had been this whole time.

"(Y/N), thought you'd dissappeared on us." Arthur joked, sticking his head out of his office.

"And yet, no one came searching for me."

He stumbled with his words."W-well, you know-"

"Don't worry Arthur, I wasn't expecting anyone to do that. And just so you know, you and John have always been good to me. I'll miss you."

"Miss us? What do you mean?"

I didn't answer as I kept on walking towards Tommy's office, knocking before entering. He was sat at his desk, Polly on the other side.

"Oh, you're both here. That saves us some time." I sadisticly smiled.

"(Y/N), what are you doing here?" Tommy asked, not rising from his chair.

I walked towards the desk, placing my briefcase down on it."I've come to discuss business."

"And what business would that be?"

"Hello Pol, sorry I haven't been round in a while."

Polly smirked at me, knowing what game I was playing.

"Look Tommy, we both know that our marriage is non existent at this point. However, a spanner has been thrown into the works." I began to unbutton my coat, knowing that I wasn't showing, but sure of what effect it would have on Polly.

"Holy shit." She exclaimed, standing up and grabbing my boob as if it was a normal thing."You're fucking pregnant."

That caught Tommy's attention. His eyes had widened, and he was staring at my stomach.

"That's why I'm here today. I understand that you and Grace Burgess are involved with each other. That doesn't bother me, our marriage is obviously over."

No response.

I opened the briefcase."I had a friend write this up. You can look it over. It's a contract stating what you'll give me after we get divorced."

Polly scoffed as she sat back down, leaning back in her chair. I handed Tommy the contract, but when he didn't take it, I let it drop in front of him. He didn't even glance at it.

"I haven't mentioned about you seeing that child."

"You're keeping it?"

"The fact that you just said that makes me think you shouldn't even be allowed to see them."

"And what else is stated in this contract?"

"That property we have outside of London, in the countryside, that is to be put in my name."

"You what?"

"I was the one that wanted it. You bought it as a gift. The least you can do is give your child a place to live."

He rubbed his eyes, sighing deeply.

"And when we write up our divorce papers, this will all be included, especially the child support."

"You've really thought about this, haven't you?"

"Yes, you know I'm not an idiot Tommy. Although you've hurt me, I'm willing for there not to be any bad blood between us. If you meet these requirements, I believe we can have some sort of peace between us."

"You've been to too many family meetings." Polly commented, looking through the papers herself.

"So, Tommy, what do you say?"

"If a divorce is what you wish, you shall have it. But I do want to know one thing. Why all of this? Why the theatrics of a contract?"

"Because I thought this was the only way to get you to understand? You haven't been speaking to me recently, might as well make it a business proposition. I'll leave you to think it through, but we need to meet with solicitors. The sooner we get this done, the sooner it'll all be over."

I left as soon as the last word left my lips. As I shut the door behind me, I let out a huge breath, only just realising how fast my heart was beating. Hastily leaving, I had stepped out of the door when Polly called me.

"Pol, I really don't want to speak about this-"

"Are you sure you want to do this? Do it like that I mean."

"I've never been more sure in my life. I can finally be happy, raise this one as a happy mum."

"You'll be a great mum."

"Can you help me with one last thing?"

"What is it?"

"Boy or girl?"

We both smiled at each other, me impatiently waiting for an answer. She felt my boob, thinking for a moment when her smile reappeared.

"Girl."

I squealed."I've always wanted a girl. Thank you Pol, for everything."

"Don't be getting soppy on me now, girl."

"It won't be goodbye forever you know, when I'm gone. My daughter will know of her aunt Polly."

"She fucking better."

As I left, I felt a new sensation. My head was lighter, I felt like I could breathe better. It was as if I was a new woman. And I was going to be. No longer would I be Mrs Shelby. I would be (Y/N) (Y/L/N), venturing out on her own and raising her daughter, without the cruel world that was Small Heath. She wouldn't be known as Tommy Shelby's daughter either. It was just my little girl and me, on our own, but we had each other.

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