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#breaking away from abuse
himidio · 11 months
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Fallout Headcanon #2.
Butch and Charon are like brothers. After Butch made it into the Capital Wasteland, there were many things, and creatures, he had to get used to. Many of which tried to kill and or maim him. It took him a while to get into the groove of things, and although he still wasn’t quite used to it all (and probably wouldn’t ever be), he at least had the LW, and their other companions. Meeting Charon was weird for him. Charon is quiet, reserved, and doesn't seem to have a mind of his own. Plus he was a ghoul, a highly irradiated human that looked kinda like zombies. He didn’t quite like the look of them, but if the LW trusted them, he’d find a way to do the same. Plus they were people too, at least the sane ones were, and so was Charon.
It took him a while but Butch eventually wanted to get to know Charon. If he was going to be traveling with them, then he at least wanted to know the basics. And quite possibly break him out of his shell. All he knew so far was that Charon was bound by a contract, and he was raised to always honor that contract. Butch didn’t like that, it sounded like abuse. Something his mother had put him through for so many years. He couldn’t let someone near him live with that even if it was none of his business. But Charon didn’t have the mentality to stop him either. It took years for Butch to get him to fully open up, but once he did, by then Butch had grown attached to the tall ghoul. In fact, he had started to see him as a little brother (even though Charon was probably MUCH older than him) and even helped him find his personality.
Charon now had people he could depend on and not be bound to anymore (without his consent anyways), and he was extremely grateful to everyone he’d met. To this day they still travel together, all of them, as a family.
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bonefall · 5 months
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⭕️Hey Bones! Is it ok if you explain and/or elaborate how Crowfeather is abusive to Breezepelt if please?⭕️
I do KNOW that crowfeather is indeed, abusive to Breezepelt, due to the fact that he emotionally and/or physically neglected him - with child neglect being known to BE a form of child abuse - and I also heard that he slashed and/or hit him within one of the books, which I believe is in the book Outcast, in chapter 16.
But I also wish people would talk and be informed about it more within the fandom, because in the parts of the fandom I’ve known portrayed Crowfeather’s neglect on Breezepelt as negative and bad, but not in a way that made me think and/or feel: “Wow, that’s pretty bad. That’s…actually abusive.” I suppose? So I hope more people will talk about it more in that type of way.
Also, please be aware that I have NOT read PoT, OoTS, etc. or barely any warrior cats books, since the majority of the information I got from the series is from the wiki and the fandom, so that probably explains why I didn’t know this part of Crowfeather’s character is as bad as it actually is until now. Also, feel free to talk about Crowfeather’s abuse on Breezepelt I haven’t mentioned and/or don’t know right now as well if you want.
I’m SO sorry that if this ask is unintentionally quite long, and feel free to make sure to take all the time you need to answer it. Thank you!
OH LET'S GOOOO
Breezepelt is both physically and emotionally abused by Crowfeather. I'm not talking about only child neglect; he is screamed at, belittled, and even once hit on-screen.
The fact that Crowfeather both neglected and abused him is very important to the canonical story of Breezepaw. There's actually a lot more to this character than people remember! Even from his first appearances he displays good qualities, a strained relationship with his father and adult clanmates, and is clearly shown to be troubled before we understand why.
As many problems as I have with the direction of Breezepelt's arc (especially Crowfeather's Trial), his setup is legitimately a praiseworthy bit of writing from Po3 which carries over into OotS. To say that Breezepelt was not abused is to completely miss two arcs worth of books SCREAMING it.
BIG POST. Glossary;
INTRO TO BREEZEPELT: The Sight and Dark River
ABUSE: Outcast, Social Alienation, the Tribe Journey.
DARK FOREST: How these factors push him towards radicalization.
For "brevity," I'm not getting into anything post-OotS. I'm just showing that Breezepelt was abused, the narrative wants you to know that he was abused, and that his status as a victim of child abuse is CENTRAL to understanding why he is training in the Dark Forest.
INTRO TO BREEZEPELT: The Sight and Dark River
Our very first introduction to Breeze is when Jaypaw walks off a cliff in the first book of Po3 and is rescued by a WindClan patrol. He's making snarky remarks, and Whitetail and Crowfeather are not happy about it. Whitetail snaps for Crow to teach his son some manners, and Crow growls for Breezepaw to be quiet.
But our proper introduction to him is at his announcement gathering, when Heatherpaw playfully introduces him as a friend,
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From the offset something's not entirely right here between Breezepaw and his father. He's cut off by Heatherpaw here, but he's touchy whenever his father is involved, and we're not entirely sure why.
Throughout Book 1, he's just rude, with a notable xenophobic streak. He's a bit of a mean rival character for Lionpaw, as they're both interested in the affections of Heatherpaw and make bids to get her attention, but nothing particularly violent yet.
He participates in the beloved Kitty Olympics and gets buried in liquid dirt with Lionpaw, basically a rite of passage for any arc.
(And Nightcloud has a cute moment where she watches over them until they fall asleep)
As the books progress, the relationship between Crow and Breeze visibly deteriorates. They start from being simply tense with each other in The Sight, to the open shouting and hitting we see in Outcast.
In the very first chapter of Dark River, we learn where his behavioral issues are really coming from;
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Crowfeather.
Breezepelt is getting xenophobia from his father. Occasionally he says something bigoted and his dad will agree and chime in, and those are the only positive moments they have together.
(Note: In contrast, Nightcloud explicitly pushes back against xenophobia, chiding Breezepelt for his rudeness to Lionpaw in back in The Sight, Chapter 21. The Sight is the book where a lot of "evidence" that the Evil Overbearing Woman is actually responsible for the rift between father and son but. No. She's not. Though she can be overprotective; Crow and Breeze have a bad relationship when she's not even around in Breeze's first appearance and even his Crowfeather's Trial Epiphany refutes it. Anyway this post isn't about Nightcloud.)
So he starts acting on his bigotry, accusing cats in other Clans of stealing, running really close to the border. What's interesting though, is that this is not entirely his doing. The first time we get physical trouble from Breezepaw, DUSTPELT aggressed it. Breezepaw and Harepaw were just chasing a squirrel and hadn't yet gone over the border at all.
We learn that WindClan is teaching its apprentices how to hunt in woodland, and tensions between the two Clans is starting to escalate as ThunderClan isn't entirely trusting of their intentions.
The second time, fighting breaks out over him and Harepaw actually crossing the border and catching a squirrel. WindClan is adamant that because it came from their land, it's their squirrel. So it's as if Breezepaw is modelling the aggression around him, learning how to behave from the older warriors and his father.
When he joins Heatherpaw and The Three to go find Gorsetail's kits in the tunnels, he's grouchy towards the ThunderClan cats, but very gentle with the kittens. Notably so. When Thistlekit is dangerously cold, he cuddles up next to her, and even assures Swallowkit when she's scared,
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Through this entire excursion, he's the one in the comforting roles for the kittens. Breezepaw is the one who is taking time to tell the kits they'll be okay, that he'll protect them, and physically supporting them when they're weak, even when he's terrified.
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And it's always contrasted to Heatherpaw who's way more 'disciplined,' as a side note. It's a detail I'm just fond of.
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All this to point out,
Breezepelt displays his best qualities when he's away from the older warriors of WindClan, and he's at his worst whenever he's near Crowfeather. Even while he's essentially just a bully character for The Three to deal with. He's gruff but cooperative when it's just him and Heatherpaw interacting with The Three, but mean when there is an adult to please.
We're getting to the on-screen abuse now, but Po3 actually sets up Breezepaw's troubles and dynamics well before it's finally confirmed that he is a victim of child abuse.
ABUSE: Outcast, the Tribe Journey.
In Outcast, Breezepaw's problems have escalated into open aggression towards cats of other Clans, and is now a legitimate concern for his own safety. Yet, he's spoken over by older warriors, and reprimanded at nearly every opportunity, right in front of the warrior of another Clan.
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Squilf just asked the poor kid how his training was going, and then Whitetail JUMPS to talk over him so she can complain, RIGHT in front of his face.
They can't even wait until they're alone to grumble something rude about Breezepaw, who is still just a teenager here;
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They taught him already that a bit of prey that runs off their own territory still belongs to WindClan, encourage him to blow past borders in pursuit, and started a battle with ThunderClan over this. And then they're pissed off at him for being aggressive, thinking it's deserved to scold him in public.
When Onestar announces that he wants Breezepaw to go on the Tribe Journey, he's devastated by it...
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Because he thinks WindClan doesn't like him, and he's right. He's gossiped about, torn into in front of a ThunderClan warrior, and even his own dad doesn't want to be around him. It's clear that Breezepaw's impulsive "codebreaking" behaviors are a desire to prove himself, and once you realize that, the way that he's being alienated is heartbreaking.
But Wait!! Hold on a minute! Where did he get a "patrol of apprentices" from to confront the dogs with, exactly?
Simple. Breezepaw CAN make friends! He actually values them a lot! So much that it's the first thing Crowfeather snaps at him over, out of frustration that his son is also being forced on this journey with him. It's an angry response to his child having emotional and physical needs, resentment that will continue all journey long.
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Note that it's plural, friends. Breezepelt has multiple friends, at least one who is not Heatherpaw, and she promises to say goodbye to them.
Up next, they state over and over, Crowfeather and Breezepaw do not like each other. Crowfeather resents being around him and dealing with his rudeness, embarrassed and angry, and Breezepaw is absolutely miserable being sent on a journey to the mountains with a man who hates his guts.
The whole while, Crowfeather is brooding longingly about Feathertail, already thinking about her as soon as he kitty-kisses Nightcloud goodbye, his eyes looking somewhere distant. He makes a jab about loyalty when Breezepaw doesn't understand why they're helping the Tribe.
Breezepaw gets smacked after he's "shoved" at Purdy and acts rude to him, while the other three manage to be polite (while still having internal dialogue about how stinky he is).
Without so much as a, "cut that out," Crowfeather raises his paw and hits him. Breeze is quiet after that.
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I don't give a shit how rude your teenager is being. Do not hit kids. Being throttled on the head is not okay.
In spite of the Three not liking Breezepaw, or even Crowfeather, they're constantly noting that their arguments are not normal, and that Crow is a cold, unsupportive father who digs into his kid constantly, and the only time he ever DOES "discipline" his child it's through immediately smacking him.
At one point, the apprentices get hungry, and decide to foolishly hunt in a barn that they know has dogs in it against Purdy's warnings. Once again, JUST like the first two books, Breezepaw is more friendly when Crowfeather is not around.
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EVERY time he is alone with cats his own age, he's grumpy but cooperative. Even enthusiastic at times! The minute Crowfeather is in the picture, he's nasty.
Naturally, the dogs show up, but Purdy rescues them. Though Brambleclaw also chews his kids out (and i have strong opinions about bramble's parenting style for another time), Hollypaw is taken aback by the contrast of what a scolding from Brambleclaw looks like vs how Crowfeather reacts.
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The narrative is desperately trying to tell you that the way Crowfeather treats his son is not normal.
And then Crowfeather is pissed off that Breezepaw is exhausted from running for his life from hungry dogs,
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And he's constantly losing his shit whenever Breezepaw says something as innocuous as "dad im hungry"
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Then, Breezepaw is made to watch his dad pine over the grave of a woman who died long before Crowfeather was even considering his mother for a mate. What he feels is jealousy, because he knows his own father doesn't love him anywhere near as much as he loves the memory of Feathertail.
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This really goes on and on and on. The ENTIRE trip is like this, with Crowfeather treating Breezepelt poorly, giving him a smack before even verbally warning him, pushing him past his limits and blowing up on him when he asks simple questions about eating or resting.
It all comes to a head in this one exchange, towards the end. Hollypaw ends up snapping at Breezepaw for his rudeness, before having an epiphany.
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It's explicit. Crowfeather's emotional abuse, his "scorn" for Breezepelt, is what is driving a wedge between him and all of his older Clanmates. Between EVERYONE in Breezepelt's life who wasn't already his friend. This awful treatment is only making him worse and worse.
Realizing this, she has more sympathy for him, but it's too late. He continues to be rude to her because he feels insulted, and her patience completely runs out. She's just a kid. They're both just kids. She's not responsible for fixing him when he's pushing everyone away at this point.
That's the end of Breezepelt in Outcast. It can't be helped anymore. Any spark of friendship they had together in the barn, or in the tunnels, is gone.
As the series progresses, Crowfeather continues to refuse any personal responsibility for the mistreatment of his son, even pinning all of Breezepelt's behavioral problems on Nightcloud. He is a cold, selfish father who only ever thinks about his own pain and reputation.
DARK FOREST: How these factors push him towards radicalization.
Everyone talks about the Attack on Poppyfrost, which happens in the first book of OotS, in oversimplified terms. YES he is going after a nun and a pregnant woman. I've never said that's not Bad.
But no one talks about "WHY", and that reason is NOT just that he desires power like so many other WC villains. Breezepelt makes his motivation very clear on the page.
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Escalating to violence was about making Jayfeather feel the way that he does.
When Breezepelt says that he wants Jay to be surrounded by "lies, hatred, and things that should never have happened," he's talking about the way HE grew up, knowing his father never wanted him, and that his Clan HATES him as a result. Killing Poppyfrost is about trying to frame Jayfeather for her murder, so ThunderClan won't trust him anymore.
When Jayfeather points out the simple truth that what Breezepelt is saying doesn't make any goddamn sense, his hatred "falters." He's blaming his half-clan half-brother for his own treatment because of the reveal, but totally failed to consider that JAYFEATHER'S ALREADY GOING THROUGH IT... so his response is just this pitiful, "s-shut up, man."
Then the ghost of Brokenstar and Breezepelt bounce him back and forth between them like a beach ball for a bit until Honeyfern's spirit shows up.
Breezepelt's childhood abuse and social alienation was a hook that the Dark Forest latched onto, to reel him in. His anger at his half-brother is so obviously misplaced that its absurdity was something Jayfeather pointed out.
We soon learn that it's the Dark Forest who's planting that ridiculous idea in his head;
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The narration is SCREAMING, "The Dark Forest is validating the anger he feels towards his father, and redirecting it towards The Three." He's described as 'kitlike,' Tigerstar's eyes are compared to a hypnotizing snake.
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This prose could not make it more obvious if it drove to your house, beat you with it, and then spoon fed you the point while you were hospitalized.
At the end of this scene, Tigerstar sends Hawkfrost to recruit Ivypaw. This scene where Breezepelt is being lovebombed, and the command to start grooming Ivypaw, ARE LINKED. That was a choice.
A VERY GOOD choice! Again, as many issues as I have with OotS, its handling of indoctrination is unironically fantastic, and it owes a good amount of that to the outstanding setup of Breezepelt that was done back in Po3. And that setup doesn't work if Crowfeather was merely distant.
Breezepelt was abused by his father, both verbally and physically. It drove him to be more aggressive to prove himself, modeling the battle culture around him. The adults of WindClan judged him based off Crowfeather's responses, shunning and belittling the 'problem' teenager, which eventually drove Breezepelt to the only group that he felt "understood" him.
In a book series that is RIFE with abuse apologia, this is one of the few times that there's any behavioral consequences for abuse and the narrative holds the perpetrator accountable for it.
But people hear Crowfeather's deflective excuse in The Last Hope where he says he never hated him, blames Nightcloud for everything, and just lick it up uncritically.
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Gee whiz, I wonder why the guy who never blames himself for any of his problems would suddenly say it was his ex-wife's fault. Real headscratcher!
(Crowfeather's Trial then goes onto, for all my own problems with it, also hold Crow accountable as the reason why Breezepelt turned out like he did. But that's a topic for another day.)
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gearbroth · 7 months
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My Spidersona all dolled up for the Spiderweb Gala!
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nyxofdemons · 2 months
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“one day im going to have to make like a three hour long video essay that's just called In Defense of Helluva Boss” Please do. I see more anti videos than I do with defense ones. Like the ones that say season 2 is terrible even though it’s barely completed and the ones that say Stolitz is a bad despite them barely having a relationship.
no literally i am sick of seeing more anti content than actual appreciation videos but the anti talking point i see most that drives me up the fucking walls is that it's "bAd RePrEsEnTaTiOn," as if that is all that queer people are allowed to have; just the vague nebulous concept of "Rep(TM)." the fact that if a straight character is a bad person then it's just that This Character is a bad person, but if a queer character is a bad person then This Is Bad Representation Of The Community And Is Homophobic. can we not just HAVE characters?? vehicles to tell a story??? tools to craft a compelling narrative??? this is part of why Helluva/Hazbin being adult shows is such a THING because i see this get shut down a lot under the guise of "uhh well just because it's an adult show doesn't mean that it can handle whatever topic it wants however it wants" and like. yeah buddy! that's true! and that's not what this is fucking about!! when people say "it's an adult show" what they mean is that it's made to be engaged with under the assumption that you would know better than to take information to shape your worldview and perception of other real life people from a fucking cartoon! the show doesn't NEED to tell you that Um Hey Guys Just So You Know This Isn't Actually Meant To Reflect How All Real Life Gay Relationships Are because you are an adult who should already be able to discern this.
"bad rep" doesn't mean "characters that are nuanced, morally gray, or just bad people." "bad rep" would be if helluva boss was a show that said "the REASON these characters are in toxic relationships / are bad people is BECAUSE they are queer, or at least directly correlated to that fact." which is. you know. very fucking different than "these characters are in toxic relationships / are bad people because they 1) live in a classist society that actively encourages them to be their worst selves and 2) are extremely traumatized."
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lollytea · 8 months
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The Blight family are so interesting IN THEORY. In execution they are....😬
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manmilkers · 5 days
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Comics fans will get mad at you for going off of the characterization that's been present and relatively consistent for the majority of a characters' appearances instead of the og personality and motivations that they kept for about 4 issues at most
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findafight · 1 year
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Me, lying face down on the carpet: I don't know how many times I have to explain that people love characters like Steve Harrington and Zuko, is that they have done things that are bad. They have said things that are bad. Possibly reprehensible. Possibly violent.
But then. And this is THE fundamental aspect of them that you must understand, they realized they were wrong. They realized that what they did and who they were were not things they were proud of. Were not things they liked doing or wanted to continue doing. Were things that hurt people. They realized that they didn't want to be that person anymore.
And then they changed. They went and tried to apologize to those they wronged. They worked to fix what they had done or helped do. They made strides to be different from what they once were.
Zuko stood up to his father, he apologized to the Gang, admitted to them he and his people were wrong, and taught Aang Fire bending. He changed and he helped and he apologized.
Steve helped clean up graffiti, he went to Jonathan's house to apologize for the terrible things he said and their fight(and got dragged into monster fighting and saved Jonathan and Nancy's lives), he replaced the camera he broke.
They owned up to their mistakes and apologized and did their best to remedy them. The apology and the changed behaviour make these characters likeable. They have flaws that have glared but they have accepted those things, tried to do better than them.
I need you to understand that there are characters out there that do the same things but never apologize. When you question why someone likes character a but not character b, when character a has also done bad things, I need you to think about whether or not that character has apologized and since changed that behaviour and thus been sincere in their apology. That is why. No excuse or justification. Did the character apologize and change? Did the other not? There you go.
Me, sitting up with the imprint of the carpet on my face: Woah haha where'd that come from?
#steve harrington#zuko#atla#stranger things#meta#redemption#finda's rambles#listen im not trying to actually compare them im just saying people always question why the love for them#and its like ?? they changed??#frustrated when ppl act as though other charscters who also did bad but never changed are more deserving of love because#because canon gives them abuse but it never has them apologize for the abusing they do#like realizing you are perpetuating the cycle of abuse and ending it and trying apologize or mend things is powerful#but do not act like your blorbo did that when they never did. they were abused. that is sad. they did terrible things. that is bad.#they never tried to change away from foing horrible things. that is also bad#just because!! a charscter is abused!! does not mean they are not culpable for their shitty actions!!!#zuko was abused and he did shitty things!! the fact he was abused isnt the reason he was redeemed#he was redeemed because he worked for it. he broke out of the mindset that caused him to be violent and cruel#he apologized directly to those he hurt most directly. and he changed#azula didnt do that!! yes she was abused and deserves compassion but she was also murderous and would have killed her brother!#she had not decided to break the cycle!!#Billy was abused. and then he abused his sister. he was violent.#he would have attacked and potentially killed a thirteen year old black boy for being friends with his sister.#at no point does he realize those actions are unacceptable. at no point does he apologize. at no point does he change#just because he was abused and abandoned does not mean he was not responsible.
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good-beanswrites · 5 months
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LCSYS ask again(undercover asker here hiiiiiaufhghghgn)thank you for responding!!!! ilovfe seeing your ideas theyre such good fuel in between trials❤️❤️
i was wondering how th prisoners would react to es’ usage of violence, like some of the younger prisoners complaining about it while the older are concerned because Hello Where did that stem from???? you cant tell me es’ “phew, i feel so much better” after hitting shidou didn’t send his mind racing a million miles per minute
ALSO curious about YONAH………… similar to how red’s violence towards es was scripted, was kotoko’s monologue about es being imperfect Also scripted, or was it on her own? yonah is probably my favourite voice drama of all time and I’m curious about how it would be interpreted in this au 🫶
Ah hello again! Thank you so much for reaching out -- every time I think I've covered everything you guys hit me with a new insane detail that makes my brain go brrrrr >:3
Because OMG I spent so much time thinking of the faked violence, I don't know why I never put as much attention on the flipside! I love the idea of Jackalope assuring them, "there will be no physical punishments. We'll talk about restraints but that's all fake. We'll make up injuries between trials but that's all fake. You don't have to worry about any real pain." And then this 15yo strolls up, interrogation one, ready to smack someone😅😅😅
Seriously though, I think it would come as a pretty big surprise to the group. They knew it was a possibility, but didn't think Es was that likely to attack, since they've made a few comments about being against violent punishments. Haruka comes back to mention the slap, and Yuno follows their instructions and says she also suffered violence, and the group is Shocked. I think it would just kill Fuuta that he wasn't allowed to hit back and avenge the others. He probably has the most complaints about the situation (and is insanely relieved that he get by in his own interrogation.) In a feeble attempt to get back at Es and make them feel bad, he encourages Muu to cry and make a big show about being afraid of them. Muu is frightened enough that it doesn't take much persuasion... I think Kotoko and unfortunately Amane wouldn't mind the threat, they both have lives in which authority showing power isn't out of place (and maybe Haruka?). Mahiru, too, thinks it's just the way a prison guard can run their prison if they want, though she's determined her charm will keep things running pleasantly.
Kazui reaches out asap* to question the legality of the experiment, since they're allowing children to get hit, even if by other children. There's a tangle of signatures and consent from everyone involved so it's okay, but the whole thing still rubs him the wrong way. He knew the experiment was a bit shady, but he(Though, this does make his first vd kind of funny -- instead of actually talking through his theories on the prison, now it feels like he's just egging Es on to see if they'll actually hit him...)
And I really like that idea that Shidou's dad instincts kick in (or maybe it's doctor instincts)! He'd understand if it was a child trying to play the role of an intimidating adult, but the way Es is doing things, the things they're saying, it all points to something deeper going on in Es' head. I can see him sitting down with the others and Jackalope to discuss. Of course Milgram gives him very little to work with, but this still kickstarts everyone's efforts to make sure Es is also taken care of post-Milgram.
*I just realized I'm still a bit fuzzy on communication during the trials. Jackalope can definitely get information to the prisoners (most commonly the 'voices' they're supposed to be hearing based on Es' notes, but also in case of emergency changes or things). I was picturing the prisoners unable to communicate outward until the trial ends, as it builds up the feeling of isolation and imprisonment. The issue is, I feel like Jackalope would want to keep that line open in case the prisoners had questions/issues with the experiment that affected their acting. So idk if the prisoners voice these concerns about Es mid-trial or they're forced to wait. I'll get back to you on that, hm
And Yonah!!
I wasn't avoiding spoilers, I actively looked for snippets here and there, but it was this ask that finally motivated me to sit down and watch it through -- and I'm SO GLAD I DID 👀 It's really well-written and wonderfully acted!! I'm floored with the whole thing omg
I really like the idea that the Milgram team instructed Kotoko to mention Es' imperfection to rattle them a bit, but left the specifics to her. Jackalope thought she'd just make some quick comment, and does a double take when he listens in on the interrogation and realizes she has a lot to say on Es and the way Milgram is run.
Jacklope told her to be harsh with Es, and she thought that was no problem at all. She felt those opinions strongly and wasn't going to go easy on the criticism just because they were a kid. She goes into the interrogation ready to stay completely put-together... and then surprises everyone and herself when Es' distress moves her to pull them into a tight hug and tell them everything's going to be alright ;---;
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angorwhosebabyisthis · 5 months
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this rewatch of sdmi has so far been a combination of skipping around and watching straight through from the beginning, and my feelings are increasingly that shaggy, daphne, and marcie are precious and oh my god someone please get these poor kids away from everyone else in this cast
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femmedefandom · 24 days
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so I actually really enjoy the OG SQQ, he is such an angsty and dramatic bitch absolutely stuffed with trauma and terrible coping behind that ice cold veneer and it’s a shame we didn’t get more of him. there’s just so much to explore with him and he gets cut out and missed by his sect exactly 0% which is pretty heartbreaking.
#svsss#shen qingqiu#shen jiu#og!sqq#a guy that had the outline of a protagonist but the realism of life#orphan child taken living on the streets that has seen too much darkness to be naive but he cares for the other children in his own way#tries to survive the streets and being sold to an abusive family#his friend is saved and brought to a better life leaving him behind#he’s stuck playing the gentle toy for an oblivious girl as her brother torments him regularly#he’s abandoned by his friend and he decides to take fate into his own hands#learning cultivation from a rogue and breaking free of his chains the only way he’s learned how#with brutal and efficient violence…all by himself#he murders his abusers and the rogue who pushed him further into darkness and crime#he makes his way to a righteous cultivation sect to see his brother who he thought was lost to him in death…#…doing apparently just fine as the future sect leader of the top sect with nothing but a bright shiny future and no worries#his past and betrayals have turned him bitter and cutting and closed off but more driven than anyone else#he suffers from qi deviation and likely issues being around other men and substandard education to become head disciple and later peak lord#but no matter how high he goes all he sees is that little beaten and abandoned boy who was good enough for no one with no future#all those fancy worries and honors mean nothing to someone who did anything to survive#all the vague apologies in the world do nothing to ease the suffering he’s experienced#all the rumors and snide remarks are worth him trying to explain himself constantly - to justify his existence#and all the self loathing that has built up could have done nothing but explode upon meeting the blessed protagonist#don’t mind me#just in my feels about sqq again#mxtx why did you make this man only to throw him away??
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mattodore · 1 year
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the echthroi protagonists on the set of barbie
#river dipping#theodore doe#matthias evanoff#echthroi#oc extras#i didn't feel like doing any of my other ocs bc there just aren't enough colors for the full lot (but still missing three lmao) but okay so#imani: this barbie is living in a plastic house#romeo: this ken is collecting roses#sehyuk: this ken is carving his name in flesh#dutchie: this ken is circling the drain#alessandria: this doll is tending to too many wounds#delphi: this barbie is stomaching bone#dionte: this ken is digging claws into dirt#nicholas: this ken is fading in and out of the light#............................... romeo fr the only oc in here having a good time i'm gkjfdhnfjghndfkjghn#!! cw for vague mentions of abuse and drugs and like... a lot trauma in these tags past this point bc i'm talking abt my ocs !!#we got fuckin uhhhhhh neglected child aching for affection grows up craving any kind of touch even a welt abusing substances and himself#vs. barely there boy nearly human enough for love but missing the mark and growing up detached wild too apart from anything to feel alive#vs. eldest daughter discarded for only son unable to break free from kinship and find herself and a life apart from the plastic#vs. murderer drug dealer crime lord born to a cold family then sent away and abandoned out of shame#vs. recovering catholic suffering guilt and violent urges toeing the line of morality and seeking acceptance#vs. werewolf never meant to lead suddenly having their entire family ripped from them and struggling with power and isolation and grief#vs. woman who spent her whole life being used and hurt and silenced growing claws and teeth to strike back and maim and feast#vs. lost boy in a foreign land mourning the loss of his mother has humanity ripped from him and is forever altered from failed shifting#vs. protective volatile arsonist orphan older brother figure whose entire story arc is [redacted]#vs..................... romeo the hopeless romantic like it's kjdnhkjfnghk#maybe it's just bc romeo is a new oc and i haven't had the time to really sink into him but i kinda like that about him#dutchie was originally supposed to be the untouched by history oc but then i made him catholic and well. that turned around pretty quickly#i fully blame his pinterest board for that like you add one cross image in a board and suddenly every pin you get recommended after is like#hey what if you fucked this guy up a bit? and who was i to argue with that? ...................also i just reached tag limit LMAOOOOOOOO
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hailsatanacab · 6 months
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so I'm enjoying watching Castaway Diva a lot more than I thought I would and like along with the main questions (who is jung ki-ho, where is he, is he one of the brothers) I'm really thinking......... did she eat her dad
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padawansuggest · 1 year
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You know what makes my heart all 🥰🥰🥰???? Obi-Wan waking up from a nightmare about Melida|Daan or one of his many fucked up missions as a Padawan only to shakily get out of bed and go to Anakin’s room where he sits on the bed and watches him sleep while petting his hair or even just passes out on the bed with him and feels safe knowing that unlike other adults in his life, Obi-Wan’s priority is going to be Anakin when it comes to anything but the will of the force and he’s not gonna abandon a little boy on another planet. And that, canon fact, he would leave the order too if Anakin didn’t want to be there, so Obi-Wan could keep him safe.
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athetos · 9 months
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Okay this is something that has taken me years to come to terms with and I just need to get off my chest especially since im not in therapy anymore and honestly only a few close friends know this but talking about it is still hard and I want to be able to better forgive myself and get rid of some of the internalized shame that plagues me because of this, and like, just be more comfortable admitting this fact to myself so I can better heal from it. And I know it’s also triggering to a lot of people so I never feel like it’s ever appropriate to discuss I should have a therapist again maybe sometime. But I’m gonna just say it and maybe delete this later. But I’m a rape + abuse survivor and it’s took me years to even “unlock” this trauma and properly process it. I’ve come a long way but idk I just wanted to get this off my chest because it’s been aching to come out but I also don’t wanna burden people.
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byanyan · 3 months
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byan disappears for two days but instead of emerging strung out and skittish like usual, their hands and arms are covered in paint and ink stains and they're a little distant but hungry as hell
#byan occasionally hiding away to work on a piece of art from beginning to finish to limit outside distractions#bc they have something in their head that they desperately need to get out#and if they lose focus at any point they'll never come back to finish it#it's probably no surprise to hear that these pieces are usually tied to their trauma#they get it in their head that if they get the vivid imagery out onto paper they'll be able to stop thinking about it (they won't)#but if they take a break at any point or get distracted and stop... coming back later is hard#oftentimes they end up destroying the unfinished piece when that happens bc now that they've had some distance#they don't want to relive the event again just to finish it#it's a coping mechanism they don't use often - at least not on this level#their sketchbooks are full of pieces like this but those are smaller and less elaborate - ones they finish in hours rather than days#sometimes certain pieces call for being bigger and more detailed... it just depends on how it looks in their mind#just smth that's been in my head for a couple days now that I've been mulling over idk#I think sometimes there's a little substance abuse that goes on at the same time too...#but not to the same level as the abuse when they disappear specifically to fuck themself up#it's more to like. make things flow and make it a little easier to sit in that memory for a prolonged period of time#so overall still not the most healthy coping mechanism :/ but it's not their WORST so. there's that.#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ headcanon ⋮ danger in the fabric of this thing i made.#drug use cw
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leederpfucker · 7 months
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Hot take based on secondhand information: Bramblestar could have had two amazing story arcs about breaking the cycle of abuse; first arc being him breaking out from the abuse from Tigerstar and Hawkfrost, and second arc being him realizing his own abusive behaviors and breaking things off with Squirrelflight because he doesn't want to see her get hurt by him anymore while also deciding to work on his abusive tendencies and behaviors
But nooooooo. We can't have shit in Warriors
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