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nimblermortal · 10 months

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Fic Request

Written-for-podding Welcome to Night Vale sketch about Take Your Child to Work day at the radio station, which is a real thing, listeners, and not because the daycare closed due to unscheduled alien abduction while your husband is doing time-sensitive experiments.

Listeners, you may not have nunus.

Listeners, you may not have crackers.

Listeners, you may not - all right, fine. And now: the Weather.

#fic request #it's written for Tea to record with all of BabyTea's interactions not written in #but absolutely appropriate in context #any time she says his name it is scrubbed over with Ominous Static #possibly the static gets more and more ominous until it is clear that the Ominous Static is the reason for the close of the recording #but the key point is: something a mother of a young child can pod while their child interrupts constantly #possible B plot - for voice reasons - where Cecil has been sex changed and does not find this worth remarking on worrying about or changing #possibly Carlos was working on a way to change him back for sex purposes but got distracted measuring the viscosity of gender fluid #have we not all been there at one point in our life listeners? Cecil remarks with obvious fondness in his tone

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maingh0st · 21 days

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I just wanted to say that I admire your dedication to taryn x garret/taryn since noone likes her lmaoo 😭😭 probably one of the only taryn truthers out there 🥲

asdkajsdkas thank you. I really didn't care that much about taryn after finishing the books—like she was interesting, and I thought holly had done something clever with her and jude's relationship, and the thought of the ghost/taryn dynamic gave me something to chew on in my free time, but that was it.

but then I came on tumblr and saw that people like. really see this 17 yr old traumatized girl as an irredeemable monster? and the more I thought about it, the more ridiculous that seemed to me?? like yes she genuinely makes bad, harmful decisions; I don't deny that. but damn, I'm glad my family & friends allowed me the chance to grow past the person I was at 17. we already see her growing in tqon, and it's clear from the new oak books that she and jude have made their peace (to the point that her disastrous marriage to locke is the butt of a joke!)

I'm also aware that for some people, taryn-hate is just a meme. that's fine, I get it, I've been in fandom spaces for most of my life at this point. but I truly believe you have more fun with the books when you read her as a whole person, and I'm also sad that we hold girl characters to much higher standards than their male counterparts—to the extent that we're so comfortable treating this teenage girl like the scum of the earth. and that's not even really to speak to the media analysis aspect of conversations surrounding taryn

#it's just bizarre to me honestly #also to be clear - im aware that for some people #taryn's actions strike at something that is just absolutely inconceivable #and therefore unforgivable. and i respect that everyone's entitled to their own feelings and readings of things #i just wish we talked about taryn (1) in the context of the world of Elfhame - not our own #and (2) in the context of her whole arc - not just books one and two #that's just basic appropriate media analysis #ask tag #tfota #taryn duarte #the folk of the air #tarynposting #thejudeduarte

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ellariasand · 2 months

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in case you’re wondering how my week is going: i now have a video of greg davies looking me in the face and asking “do you see alex [horne] and i as porcelain ladies?”

#taskmaster junket was appropriately unhinged #absolutely will not provide context for that #taskmaster #greg davies #alex horne #maggie.txt

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tired-fandom-ndn · 2 months

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I don't usually give a crap about grammar but I DO think it's important to try to show the bare minimum of thoughtfulness and respect when using words from languages that are from marginalized ethnic groups or often appropriated from in your own culture, especially when those words are often misused in harmful ways.

#this is why i am so insistent on fujoshi not being pluralized #because grammar is fake but misuse and appropriation of language is very real #and people want to take a very japanese word and twist its meaning around in a way that is harmful #woth absolutely no understanding of the language or cultural context it comes from #same with seraphim being treated as singular #like i cannot get into the thousands of years of appropriation and butchering of hebrew especially in religious contexts in these tags #but it's fucking bad. and the least we can do is try to correct ourselves and remember that this is a word taken from another language #and has been misused and appropriated in both religious and secular contexts #and that's a form of antisemitism we can learn to recognize and try to fix when we see it or contribute to it

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mama-mera · 5 months

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okay you know what? I think it's time for me to take advantage of the release of the Percy Jackson series to talk a little about the relationship between the Greek and Roman gods, because I have a feeling that we're going to have a new generation of people who are convinced that the Romans "stole" the gods of the Greeks and... um, I feel the need to talk and analyze this thing with you. Because the matter is much more complicated than you think

Like SERIOUSLY, the pjo fandom and Greco-Roman mythology enthusiasts in general need this chat.

First of all it is important to understand how the Italic populations came into contact with Greek culture, and who the first Romans were.

Southern Italy (Sicily, Calabria, Campania and Puglia) was colonized by the Greeks since the 8th century BC.

Like any colonization, the local population had to adapt to the culture, religion and language of the colonizer (in Italy there are still two dialects coming from ancient Greek. Griko in Puglia, and Grecanico in Calabria). Every part of the territory considered Magna Graecia (Megàle Hellàs) presents archaeological finds relating to the Greek colonies, and with them also temples dedicated to the gods. (So much so that in Sicily, at the beginning of spring the Antesphorie (or antephorie) were celebrated in honor of Demeter and Persephone, for example).

The entire Etruscan pantheon was strongly influenced by the Greek one. The indigenous deities were joined by the Hellenic ones, creating a new religion.

But still: who were the Romans? The legend of the foundation of Rome refers to Romulus and Remus, but from an archaeological point of view the Romans were probably the result of a mixture of Latin, Sabine (plus Samnites and Sabelli*) and Etruscan peoples. The latter influenced the initial Roman Pantheon the most. Just think of the similarities between the Etruscan goddess Menrva/Menerva and the Roman goddess Minerva.

The same applies to Maris and Mars, who among other things share holidays in March (a month dedicated to them moreover).

Unfortunately there is not much information on the Sabine and Latin ethnic group, but it is known for certain that Etruscans had contact with Magna Graecia, and the Greeks in general, so their culture was never unknown to the Romans.

So what does this tell us? That the Italic populations knew the Greek Pantheon, because they had been colonized and/or influenced by the Greeks. The first Romans can't exactly steal something that's already part of their culture.

*Samnites, Sabelli and Sabines were part of the same ethnic group, and although all three groups can generally be called "Sabines", I preferred to specify. At the same time it is not known how involved the Picenes and Irpinians were initially with the birth of Rome, so I have not mentioned them.

#it was a very quick and not very in-depth post #but it's late and I just needed to vent about this #if you want to make a joke about the Romans stealing religion from the Greeks that's completely ok #I do it too!!#but I think it is important to understand what really happened in the early period of Roman history #the Romans didn't wake up one morning thinking “you know what I should really do? steal a random religion”#the historical context is much more complex than what one might commonly think #and I understand that in schools outside italy there is no interest in explaining the phenomena that led to the birth of the Roman religion #but in doing so in my opinion it creates a great confusion that could be avoided #did the Romans assimilate numerous religions throughout their history? absolutely #just look at what happened with the Egyptian and Mithras #it wasn't a question of cultural appropriation but more of “I pray to all the gods that exist so no one can get angry with me”#greek myth #greek mythology #roman myth #roman mythology #roman history #greek history #pjo #pjo series #please learn about the Etruscan gods because they are much cooler than the Greek and Roman versions

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vulpinesaint · 10 months

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in other news i get two weeks of summer break!!! :D i thought my summer classes were going to just lead me straight into school again but i do actually get some breathing room before it all starts up once more :D

#can't WAIT to be back in french class i'm gonna have so much fun #and like! ten thousand english classes!!!! everybody say yayyyyyy!!!!#gonna see what i'm taking rn actually. chronicle it #taking literary theory + criticism ; us literature 1 ; folklore and mythology ; sacred texts ; nd emerging lit in global context #on the waitlist for the emerging lit one. but i am first on the waitlist so. it's practically my class already #absolutely no doubt that someone will drop if i'm not just allowed to crash #even if i don't get it it's no big deal though honestly! it would be my only tuesday/thursday class so i wouldn't have to be on campus...#spending five days a week on campus is pretty silly. i got through it last semester but it'd be nice not to have that #nd i'm at 18 units with that class so if i don't take it i'll be back down to 15 which is totally reasonable #bracken's favorite hobby is actually being completely insane with his school + work schedule #18 units and i'm still like 'yeah i wanna work 20 hours though'#you have clinical issues. shut up.#anyway hopefully i'll be able to work 20 hours a week on top of this sdkfjghdsf #if monica gives me morning shifts! i can do that easy peasy (afternoon shifts are 5 hours instead of 3 and a half now. kiss kiss)#so two + a half afternoon shifts a week and a couple morning shifts... we're so set #'bracken when will you have time to do homework' that's a problem for me to solve by just not having free time <3 #one of my classes is asynchronous so. ha. haha. i'm sure i'll have appropriate amounts of time to do work.#mondays + wednesdays i have class straight from 1:30 to 7 but it's FINE! it's FINE!#i'm sure i will be very reasonable about it #i got through my three hour 5-8 film lecture last semester. so i can do anything #would i prefer morning classes? oh absolutely. but having the morning for homework will still be good for me #so excited to be back in school i love school so much #( <— has been in school this whole time w/ summer classes )#OH MY GOD I WAS GONNA SAY THOUGH. I'M SO FUCKING EXCITED TO TAKE FOLKLORE AND MYTHOLOGY #anyway #valentine notes

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tarydarrington · 2 years

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Sorry babe... Gotta handle these ninjas

I know this is one of those messages that you’re sending to a bunch of people, but the experience of getting this message while actively editing the first piece of Beauyasha fic I’ve written in ages was a trip

#also windows has a ninja cat emoji evidently?? there will never be a more appropriate context 🐱‍👤#asks #anonymous #and anon i absolutely agree that beauyasha 🤝

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pallases · 2 years

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not my grandma telling me it’s “sad when [my] brother cares more about his hair than [me]” bc he was blow drying it 😐 girlie we are both well aware that if you take a blow dryer to my hair it just comes out big and dry and i know you would throw a fit over that too <3 not sure what you want me to do abt it!

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aromanticannibal · 10 months

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has anyone noticed tiktok becoming a war zone or is it just my for you page 🗿🗿

#in no specific order people complain about the race gender people (can't remember the exact term but yknow) instead of ignoring them #context being absolutely fucking gone from tiktoks (saw a black person say that all queer creators succeed because they appropriate black #culture and also something about single braids except there were not even an exemple or smth #like people in the comments saying research!! bro what are we supposed to research??#and I just saw a long ass exposé on why neopronouns suck including “trans people need dysphoria to be trans” bullshit #like tiktok is just being tumblr all over again they were right #and of course the ai filters and I keep saying I'm not interested by these videos to the tiktok algorithm but that doesn't work #ugh #at this point fucking youtube shorts is easier to curate than tiktok

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elainemorisi · 2 years

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I like sff and I like Star Trek and man, those things are two different things in every way except the obvious

#Star Trek is absolutely unquestionably science fiction don't get me wrong #but my interest in and affection for those two things is entirely different #it's really basically that Star Trek is all about its particular vision and politics and that's entirely fine and interesting #but I periodically mentally run up against the vast chasms on the edge of that flat world where more aggressive sff ideas would go #if they were in any way appropriate to the setting which they basically are not #one of the biggest examples of course being the aliens are so human #(except the Borg which are the single successful instance of the only other real way almost anyone can do aliens #which is of course consistent stick-the-landing horrors)#which of course happens nearly all the time in other sff too but it's ALL the MANY aliens in MANY contexts ykwim #and like that's in no way a bad thing; ST isn't about true alienness in any way it's about other stuff including human-alienness #but yes that and others it just makes it very tricky for me to switch from one to the other without a jarring 'butwaitohrightno'

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sweet-as-an-angel · 1 year

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König w/ a Mommy Kink

Warnings: 18+, mommy kink, breeding kink, kinda submissive König, mention of plugs, smut, pet names, AFAB Reader, etc.

This is in my brain. I’m now making it your problem.

There’s nothing in this man’s history to suggest parental issues, but I can definitely see him having a mommy kink.

When he’s in a subby mood, he’ll beg you to ride him

something about seeing you on top makes him weak

The first time you discovered König mommy kink was completely accidental: you'd managed to hit his sweet spot and, reduced to a moaning mess, König yelled, clear as day, something obscene.

"M-Mutter!"

You didn't realise what it was at the time, assuming it was something in German, but you'd never heard this before, regardless of context.

You stopped bouncing on him, your hands on his chest, and leaned down to him.

"What was that, baby?"

König didn't reply, his face flushed with either exasperation or embarrasment - it was impossible to tell.

When you came to realise he wasn't going to talk, you slid a hand up his throat and gripped his jaw, forcing him to look at you.

"I said, what was that?"

König eyes couldn't meet yours, eyes settling somewhere on your chest instead.

"Mutter," he said, voice low, quiet. He swallowed, feeling you weren't going to let up.

"It means 'Mother' in German."

Your heart jumped in your chest, like you'd discovered an island no one else had.

König couldn't say a thing, worried he'd frightened you off with his...particular interests.

Instead, you smiled, releasing his jaw and returning to his chest.

"Alright," you said softly, half-lidded gaze making König weak with anticipation.

"I'll take care of you, baby. You gonna let me do that?"

König couldn't get the words out quick enough, a stream of hasty 'yes's falling from him.

After that initial discovery, you teased König for his mommy kink.

Any chance you got - you were relentless.

"König, sweetie, can you come and help mommy out in the kitchen?"

"Sure thi- wait...what did you say?"

And his face would break out in a contained blush each time.

You knew when to stop, though; you weren't a monster.

Whenever you were topping, you'd call him "baby boy,"; "baby,"; "sweetie," - things like that.

And he'd whine and moan every time.

"You gonna cum for me, baby?"

"Y-yes, mutter..."

One night, you asked him if he wanted you to breastfeed you.

You had no milk in you, obviously, but that didn't stop König.

While he sucked on you, you stroked his hair, calling him a "good boy," - telling him how you'd "have to let you put a baby in me someday,"

His eyes lit up at that.

And then you unearthed his breeding kink.

He loves you, wants to possess you in ways nobody else can, and to have something he literally put inside you was, in his eyes, the best way to do it.

Calls you mutter when he's trying to breed you, though for a different reason.

"You'll be such a good mother to our children, my love," he'd say, panting as he slammed into you.

He wouldn't leave until he knew you were satisfied and full.

And my god, this man won't stop until you're passed out beneath him, unable to take any more of him, his cum leaking out of you.

Is the type to plug you, either with his cock or an actual plug.

Won't let you take it out. It's staying.

Can get a bit dominant when you disobey him.

"Did I say you could do that, baby?"

Transitions into a daddy kink.

This man's transitioning through the kink spectrum fr.

When he's topping, he'll make you call him daddy.

Gives him a feeling of power.

If you want some more dominant König, read this.

Overall, you just make him feel so safe, so loved - he could scarcely think of any other name to call you except mutter (though, of course, not exactly appropriate in an every day context).

He loves you more than absolutely anything, and there are no limits as to what he would do for you.

Reblog for more content like this! It helps creators like myself tremendously and it is greatly appreciated :-)

Masterlist Masterlist [Continued] Masterpost Modern Warfare AI Masterlist

AO3 Wattpad

#konig x reader #konig mw2 #konig headcanons #konig call of duty #könig x reader #konig x you #konig modern warfare #König #könig x you #könig call of duty #mw2 x reader #mw2 fanfic #mw2 smut

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too-fond-to-be-fearful · 5 months

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Been thinking recently about the goings-on with Duolingo & AI, and I do want to throw my two cents in, actually.

There are ways in which computers can help us with languages, certainly. They absolutely should not be the be-all and end-all, and particularly for any sort of professional work I am wholly in favour of actually employing qualified translators & interpreters, because there's a lot of important nuances to language and translation (e.g. context, ambiguity, implied meaning, authorial intent, target audience, etc.) that a computer generally does not handle well. But translation software has made casual communication across language barriers accessible to the average person, and that's something that is incredibly valuable to have, I think.

Duolingo, however, is not translation software. Duolingo's purpose is to teach languages. And I do not think you can be effectively taught a language by something that does not understand it itself; or rather, that does not go about comprehending and producing language in the way that a person would.

Whilst a language model might be able to use probability & statistics to put together an output that is grammatically correct and contextually appropriate, it lacks an understanding of why, beyond "statistically speaking, this element is likely to come next". There is no communicative intent behind the output it produces; its only goal is mimicking the input it has been trained on. And whilst that can produce some very natural-seeming output, it does not capture the reality of language use in the real world.

Because language is not just a set of probabilities - there are an infinite array of other factors at play. And we do not set out only to mimic what we have seen or heard; we intend to communicate with the wider world, using the tools we have available, and that might require deviating from the realm of the expected.

Often, the most probable output is not actually what you're likely to encounter in practice. Ungrammatical or contextually inappropriate utterances can be used for dramatic or humorous effect, for example; or nonstandard linguistic styles may be used to indicate one's relationship to the community those styles are associated with. Social and cultural context might be needed to understand a reference, or a linguistic feature might seem extraneous or confusing when removed from its original environment.

To put it briefly, even without knowing exactly how the human brain processes and produces language (which we certainly don't), it's readily apparent that boiling it down to a statistical model is entirely misrepresentative of the reality of language.

And thus a statistical model is unlikely to be able to comprehend and assist with many of the difficulties of learning a language.

A statistical model might identify that a learner misuses some vocabulary more often than others; what it may not notice is that the vocabulary in question are similar in form, or in their meaning in translation. It might register that you consistently struggle with a particular grammar form; but not identify that the root cause of the struggle is that a comparable grammatical structure in your native language is either radically different or nonexistent. It might note that you have trouble recalling a common saying, but not that you lack the cultural background needed to understand why it has that meaning. And so it can identify points of weakness; but it is incapable of addressing them effectively, because it does not understand how people think.

This is all without considering the consequences of only having a singular source of very formal, very rigid input to learn from, unable to account for linguistic variation due to social factors. Without considering the errors still apparent in the output of most language models, and the biases they are prone to reproducing. Without considering the source of their data, and the ethical considerations regarding where and how such a substantial sample was collected.

I understand that Duolingo wants to introduce more interactivity and adaptability to their courses (and, I suspect, to improve their bottom line). But I genuinely think that going about it in this way is more likely to hinder than to help, and wrongfully prioritises the convenience of AI over the quality and expertise that their existing translators and course designers bring.

#alright getting off my soapbox now #apologies if this is not particularly coherent - i was very much working through my thoughts as I was writing #but yeah tl;dr i am not huge on LLMs especially for language education and am deeply disappointed by the way things are trending #anyways if anyone knows any learning tools that are similarly structured i'd appreciate the recommendation #being able to easily do a little bit of study on a regular basis helped me a lot and i've yet to find anything similar #duolingo #language #language learning

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susansontag · 10 months

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I’ve always shied away from discussing ikuhara’s usage of incest in utena because it’s quite a sticky topic in shoujo manga and anime but also because those uninitiated with that are likely to assume his using it is somehow perverted and will have a knee-jerk reaction. but I think he’s honestly very clever with it, using it both on a metaphorical level to elicit sympathy for the characters and their romanticised notions of these relationships but also on a literal level to show the dangers and abuse inherent in these kinds of relationships.

nanami is the most obvious example. even though we as an audience may not understand her almost romantic fixation on attracting the attentions of her older brother touga, we can still sympathise with her behaviour on a metaphorical level; she is thirteen, she is lonely, he is her entire world and the world is taking him, and thus her childhood, away from her and she is helpless to stop this. nanami is not perverse, she is trying to secure control over a situation in which she has none. a more common and relatable example is when one feel as though they, their siblings, their parents, etc, revert back to the dynamics they solidified in childhood when they spend time as a family unit. it’s a phenomenon that can be irritating (‘they’re treating me like a child’) but also comforting, familiar, and certain.

yearning to remain in a permanent state of pre-adolescence is something a lot of different characters in utena contend with, albeit in different ways, but hers is so interesting because ikuhara decides she must at one point be met with the reality of what this would mean if taken to its extreme. nanami understands akio is abusing anthy before utena does, and draws strict lines between what those ‘perverse’ siblings are doing and her pure love for touga. yes, she lacks sympathy for anthy outwardly, but her horror at confronting incestuous abuse in a real, unromanticised context, forces her to understand how her innocent outlook can be taken advantage of by people who would mean to do her harm.

and then touga assaults her, and when she rejects him, bewildered, he accuses her: isn’t this what you wanted? of course he can’t understand it’s the absolute opposite of what she wanted to preserve. one could argue here that ikuhara is blaming nanami for her naivety, even punishing her for being so short-sighted. but on the contrary I think he’s desperately seeking our empathy for her here, in showing us that a child’s romanticisation is not an excuse for her victimisation nor her offering consent. and if all we want to focus on is the fantasies of an alienated child, we fail to appropriately condemn abusers from taking advantage of children like nanami.

#it’s complicated by the fact touga himself is only 17 and probably a victim of csa himself #but utena is a messy show that has a lot of perspectives to offer #but I think nanami is so good and I think what he does here is very tasteful #revolutionary girl utena #nanami kiryuu #anthy himemiya #moth.txt

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akajustmerry · 2 months

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Can someone please explain this richonne van lore to me? I can't listen to the podcast you mentioned

oh, I will GLADLY. so season 7 episode 12 of The Walking Dead is called 'Say Yes' and is widely known as the rick and michonne honeymoon episode by cast and fans alike. It aired in 2017.

For context, it's not a literal honeymoon but those are the vibes. it's the first episode dealing with their relationship properly after they first get together in season 6. Rick and Michonne hornily volunteer for a sneaky cheeky supply run to go retrieve supplies surrounded by a herd of Walkers.

Rick and Michonne are horny as fuck so the episode has lots of them kissing and so forth. now, the VAN SCENE™ is them in the back of the van they've been driving around making out very aggressively. it's as close as TWD can ever get to a sex scene where people are not having sex because TWD was a cable TV show. It's a very brief scene, less than 30 seconds but it's uhh VERY hot.

after the episode aired, Danai Gurira and Andrew Lincoln were asked about shooting these scenes on a panel (I can't find a link but if I do I'll put it here/if anyone has one lmk). both of them mention that, while shooting the van scene, there was a take where they got so "carried away" the footage would never be released. the director of the episode also joked he keeps the footage locked up. None of them ever really said what was in the footage but....well, we're all adults and we can all have a guess. and that's all we could do.... UNTIL NOW.

So, there's a podcast called Richonne Revelry, hosted by some huge fans of TWD. In an episode they released earlier this year about the trailer for The Ones Who Live, one of the hosts mentioned that they met, TWD director Greg Nicotero. Nicotero directed 'Say Yes' and so the podcast host says that she asked Nicotero to tell her about the van scene shoot.

ACCORDING TO HER, Nicotero spilled the beans. Apparently, they just set up the gear in the van with no crew as a closed set and told Danai Gurira and Andrew Lincoln they could just do their thing, which is pretty standard for scenes like that. BUT, according to the host of this podcast, Nicotero said that when his crew got the footage, it was wayyyyyy too raunchy (she says he told her danai was topless for most of it) and danai and andrew were making out so uh.....intensely that the footage couldn't even be spliced to make it appropriate for the show. Danai and Andrew, apparently, were very shocked they had to reshoot because they were actually really happy with it, but Nicotero insisted they do it again and rein it in so they could have some usable footage. The version of the scene we see in the show is the "tame" reshot version, allegedly.

All of this is alleged, of course. A lot of people joke like it's a sex tape, but honestly nudity guidelines for commercial TV are so strict and specific it doesn't take much for any intimate footage to become unusable. Plus, unsimulated sex is a hugeeee no no in mainstream entertainment. Productions get crucified over it. so if that had happened we absolutely would not have heard about it, let alone hear actors joking about it for years. But anyways, that's the lore! One thing we can all agree on is that Danai Gurira and Andrew Lincoln are DEDICATED to their craft, by all reports lmao. personally, I'm just glad to hear a behind the scenes story about actors getting carried away in the moment which DOESN'T involve anyone getting hurt or mistreated 🥰

#richonne #andrew lincoln #danai gurira #the walking dead #and imo they're so valid for all of that <333 #also ppl thinking they having some type of affair when they're actually just theatre trained so they're insane theatre kids #twd van lore

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vidavalor · 4 months

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(Non-Frozen) Peas. A Good Omens Sex Meta Thing Side Dish

Shorter little vegetable-themed side dish to Crepes, which you do not have to have read first. All by way of Aziraphale's dirty French in S2 about how he has a craving for Crowley's Eden.

*slips into GO fandom quietly* *whispers*

Do you all realize that another translation of Aziraphale's "Ou est la plume de la jardiniere de ma tante?" is...

"Where is the feathered garden box of my queen?"

I probably don't need to tell you that both 'garden' and 'box' are sexual euphemisms for lady parts and, to make matters funnier, remind you of this scene earlier in the season, in which a literal box became related to... well, it's somewhat open to interpretation so let's just call it a gasp-worthy, part-related situation. :)

"Where is the feathered garden box of my queen?" is Aziraphale saying that it's been a minute since he worshipped Lady Crowley and he misses her.

This would account for Aziraphale's impish "but you understood me" and flirty little smile and wiggles. He's so cute about it that Nina comes out of her coffee shop to try to hear what they're talking about that's made the bookseller look so alive and has Snarky Sunglasses all flustered.

Crowley's "Only because, for two hundred and fifty years, you've been wittering on about the plume of your imaginary 'tante.'" = "Only because, ever since you took French lessons the human way, I've had to listen to you euphemistically referring to my occasional wild flower garden and calling me your queen in two different languages and I love to hate how much I absolutely love it."

We know that Crowley did understand Aziraphale and not just because he also speaks French but because his traditional choices in translating it back to Aziraphale in protest-- "you don't have an aunt, she doesn't have a gardener and he doesn't have a... pen"-- is intentionally a bit incorrect because Aziraphale used the feminine French word for 'gardener'-- la jardiniere-- in his sentence. As a result, Crowley is protesting that "the gardener" is a he right now, Aziraphale, and he doesn't have a-- pause of 'wait, this isn't going to work if I translate 'plume' as 'feathers'-- euphemistic or literal-- as I have both so I'll go with the other thing the word means instead'--... pen.

(Which winds up even funnier since a pen is phallic and euphemistic, in this sense, for currently having a penis, which is actually Crowley's current state of effort in that moment. Hold those thoughts until we get to turnips and inkwells down below lol.)

A 'plume' in French is a pen, a feather, a quill, and a cloud of rising smoke. In Good Omens, it's also used in the smoke-like definition by Michael to describe the pink plume of magical energy that came from the bookshop when Crowley and Aziraphale miracled together. Crowley responded with 'pen'-- which is a riff on the fact that Aziraphale is riffing on "la plume de ma tante", a cliched line said derogatorily to mean 'those sentences that you learn when you learn a new language that you'd never say in real life.' Crowley used 'aunt', 'gardener' and 'pen' as the translation in reference to the cliche Aziraphale was referencing. Aziraphale, though, adjusted the line, as we saw-- adding words to it to make it a stealth, flirty request-- and Crowley did hear the innuendo. Crowley correctly heard Aziraphale using 'plume' in the 'feather' sense (hilariously, considering that they have actual feathers in their angel/demon forms lol), with the 'feather'-context 'plume' being euphemistic for Crowley keeping it real down below.

(It could be worse, Crowley. He could be in a blasphemous mood and referring to it as "The Burning Bush"... which I feel like you'd actually find hilarious but anyway, moving on...)

In English, appropriated from the French, a 'jardiniere' is a flower box/garden planter. 'Tante' is French for 'aunt' but it's also a word meaning both 'queen'/'pansy' in the queer sense of the words (a 'pansy' also being a kind of flower, of course, adding to the Eden motif that "*the* Southern Pansy" Aziraphale has going on for his gardener partner here) but 'tante' is also one of the words that just means 'queen' as well, in the 'regal' sense of the word. It might not be the first word Aziraphale would use if he were, instead, speaking a sentence in French about, say, Queen Camilla-- but it's maybe a more appropriate one for flirting with his gender-everything partner by telling him in French that it's been too long since he spent some quality time with his queen's jardiniere.

'A la jardiniere' is also a French cooking term. It translates as "in the manner of the gardener's wife" (Gabriel: "Whatever that is."). It is obviously an archaic-sounding term when it comes to gender but, for the purposes of metaphor here, it's actually a little useful. The phrase is born out of the idea that the chef would be male, straight and married and that his wife would be keeping their kitchen garden-- which, even though she was probably running it, is credited to him, because the patriarchy-- from which fresh vegetables could easily be picked and used in a dish. As such, it's a lot more fun that Aziraphale is using the French here because the actual gardener doing the garden work in the definition of 'jardiniere' is specifically female by the term's description, so it's another way to reference Crowley's femininity.

There's also, of course, that "in the manner of the gardener's wife" is about as porny a definition for a phrase that can possibly be translated from one language to another lol and so adds to the idea of 'jardiniere' being sexually euphemistic. Atop that, there's the fact that the word itself relates food to romance and sex by referring to the chef and the gardener as married in its definition. The second half of this scene is the Nina & Crowley "partners" conversation. In a season that has Crowley and Aziraphale unable to deal with words like 'couple' and 'partners', if only Maggie and Nina understood that maybe they don't know how to use traditional words but damned if Aziraphale isn't already on covertly calling Crowley his spouse when flirting with him.

While 'a la jardiniere' is a cooking term, 'la jardiniere/jardiniere' is also a French food term. It is a side dish or a garnish of mixed vegetables, usually spring garden vegetables. So, carrots, green beans, potatoes (Crowley: "You say 'potato', I say 'excellent'" lol), turnips (Aziraphale can turn garden variety sex into inkwells!-- haha 'garden' pun, get it? please send help-- and inkwells are the things one dips a quill pen into.... and, now, we're back to the 'pen' translation of 'la plume...').

The most signature vegetables of jardiniere, though, are peas.

As Crowley would tell Shax and anyone who will listen, literal ducks-the-water-fowl need not get their actual jardiniere defrosted.

Aziraphale-- the more discerning duck-- likes his hot, though.

~~~

If you have not already and would like to read more meta like this:

#ineffable husbands #good omens #crowley #aziraphale #good omens 2 #good omens meta #aziracrow #crowley x aziraphale #good omens s2 #genderfluid crowley

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whetstonefires · 4 months

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See I don't necessarily disagree with what seems to be the primary reading that Yue Qingyuan's shifu fucked him over, caring nothing for his needs or preferences and only for whether he was useful. That makes sense, it ties into plenty of the generational and societal themes of the story. It fits.

But iirc we don't actually get enough information to know that's what happened.

And the thing is it would be so in-character and also thematically appropriate if Yue Qingyuan absolutely did not explain his goals or why he was working so hard, because it was private and shameful and he didn't expect any sympathy, and there was a high risk of losing everything if he blabbed.

And also if he engaged with the existing ruleset with which he was presented, i.e. 'can't go off on your own on personal business until you've mastered your sword,' in the most negative and controlling manner possible, as absolute commandments.

He's a different kind of guy but he comes from the same background as Shen Jiu! It fucked him up also!

He is very very very not a guy who trusts the system to make allowances for him--even once he has all the power he 'does what he wants' and 'makes selfish choices' as a conscious transgression; not something he has a right to do, just something he can get away with so he's gonna. (And ofc he spends almost all the latitude he grants himself on sqq.)

And even less is he a guy who opens up easily.

He isn't too proud to ask for help or pity, so much as he just doesn't expect to get any.

So in this interpretation, he understood that rule as a non-negotiable barrier in his path, the target to overcome, and focused all his considerable will and talent on overcoming it through the sphere of action he felt he had control over.

And fucked himself up bad.

Whereupon his teacher, possessing absolutely no context for this dumb shit their star pupil pulled, did the only thing they thought might work to save his life, paying in the process no attention to the raving of someone deep in a psychotic break.

Like, I feel like there should have been a better, kinder medical option, but I don't know for sure that there was, so I can't say with certainty this was the kind of cruelty that derives from not caring enough.

And it really would be kind of elegant and so typical of Yue Qingyuan's fundamental tragedy if the real mistake was 'not confiding in anybody' the whole time.

And he was just so deeply sunk into the understanding that explaining and asking were useless that, even looking back, it never really occurred to him that maybe his mistake wasn't 'fucking it up when trying too hard to solve everything on his own' but 'assuming there was no help to be had, and that he had to do it all on his own.'

Like. What if this really could all have been avoided if he'd just trusted and communicated with the adult in charge of him? But of course, of course his history of trauma (neglect, child abuse, exploitation, being the One Responsible for the younger kids whom he could not keep safe) meant he was absolutely not going to do that.

It was basically impossible. For the person he was, the person the world had made of him. And that's always been the core tragedy the whole novel circles back upon.

People can only ever be themselves, and so very often the elements of self that let them survive until now are that which dooms them, that means they need someone else to intervene if they're ever going to be saved. Because your personal doom is always the thing from which you can't save yourself.

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