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darkmulti · 3 years

Note

(Yandere and non con warning)

Def not the only one who wants a 18th century h.c of possessive and controlling, husband!Jungkook x forced wife!reader. Jungkook gets jealous after witnessing another man asking you out and when you come back home at night, he breeds you. Please make it rough and non con. Thank you❤️‍🔥

-> you’re definitely not the only one. I can assure you that I’ve thought about this too many times😫

⚠️: NON CON, YANDERE!JUNGKOOK, Squirting/piss play, Physically, mental and emotional abuse, spit play,

-> sorry for any mistakes

Your parents owned a local bakery store

All the recipes were from your late grandmother

You spent almost all of your time there because you were in charge of everything

The store was under your parents’ name but you were the one running it

Sometimes, you even slept there because it’d be too late to walk home

Your dedication to the bakery made it successful

Although, you were the one doing all the work, you parents took all the credit and money

They weren’t paying you because you’re their child

They don’t need to pay you

“It’s a women’s place.” Your father said

You wanted to go back to school however, your parents laughed in your face

“School aren’t for girls, Y/N. Learn how to cook and clean. That’s all you need to know. Let the men handle everything else.”

You were tired of fighting with them and eventually stopped because they threatened to set you up in an arrange marriage

Now, it was just you and the bakery

You had many loyal customers and recently, one has been coming everyday, at the same time

He’d always buy a loaf of banana bread and if he was in a good mood, a blueberry muffin as well

Then, he’d sit in the corner table and eat two - three slices before getting up and leaving

He’d always leave a tip behind and you always kept it for yourself

One day, he didn’t come and you were surprised

For a year straight, he came and bought the same two things

Now, he hasn’t visited in 4 days

Tonight, you came back home for the first time in a while

Your parents had visited the bakery to collect “their” earnings and told you that you have to go somewhere with them that evening

After closing up and cleaning up, you went home and got ready

Your parents were taking you out for dinner as a treat for all your hard work

You were really excited because they were finally acknowledging your hard work

Once you arrived at the restaurant, your parents lead you to a table that already had three people seated

You immediately recognize one of them

It’s that guy who buys your banana loaf!

You sat in front of him while your parents greeted the two other strangers

“Oh, so this is your daughter? She’s gorgeous! Come here and give me a hug.”

You awkwardly chuckled and got up to hug the middle aged women

“Oh! Where are my manners? My name is Jeon F/N, this is my husband, Jeon F/N and this is our son, Jeon Jungkook. We’re your soon to be in laws!”

You heart dropped to the floor

“I-in laws?” You asked, confused

“Yeah, honey. Is this your first time hearing about this? We’ve been talking to your parents for a while now.”

You snapped your head towards you parents and they looked emotionless

“No, no they didn’t tell me anything.”

Dinner with them was hell

Your parents were talking about your wedding arrangements right in front of you

You didn’t know what to do

You wanted to rebel but then your parents would disown you

Just like that, you’d be homeless with little money to survive

In the end, you’d be paying the heavy price

You looked at Jungkook who was staring at you the whole time

You wondered if he knew about this

Maybe, that’s why he came to the bakery everyday

“Did you know anything about this?” You said loud enough for him to hear

“I did.”

“For how long?”

“Since last year.”

You eyes widen, in shock

You were right!

“Why didn’t you stop it?”

“Why would I stop it when I’m the one who wants it?”

You scrunch your eyebrows, in confusion

“What’re you talking about?”

“Since the first day I met you, I wanted to marry you. I told my parents and now, we’re getting married.”

Now, you were mad

You got up and stormed off, catching everyone’s attention

You walked to the bakery and locked yourself in

Here, you thought your parents were acknowledging you for first time, when they were actually setting you up for a marriage so they don’t have to take care of you

You cried yourself to sleep that night

The next couple of weeks, the bakery was closed due to your wedding

The wedding was spectacular

You would’ve love it if you weren’t being forced into a marriage

After the wedding, Jungkook took your precious virginity

He made sure to pleasure you until you passed out

He was so in love with you

Now, he was finally able to show you how much he loved you

And mark you as his

The next couple of months, he was attached to you

He took over his family’s business and you took over your family’s business

He’d visit you every day at work to check if you’re with another man

He was so paranoid about it, sometimes he’d come by 3 or 4 times to make sure you were not cheating

You thought he missed you and that’s why he kept stopping by (which is half true) however, you had no idea that he was possessive and controlling

You had to learn the hard way

Sometimes, you wouldn’t leave work until midnight

You had so much things to do like preparing for the next day, making a to-do list, making a grocery lists, and cleaning every area of the shop

It’s time consuming, so obviously you finish up pretty late

Jungkook absolutely hates that

Although you stay late in the shop once in a while, he can’t stand it

He wants you to be in his arms every night

Jungkook gets angry when you’re not

This was your fourth time staying out late in the shop and he’s had enough

He couldn’t help but feel paranoid about what you were actually doing in the shop

What if you lied and went on a date with another man?

What if you were running away from him?

Or even worse, what if you were having sex with another guy?

He raced to the bakery and banged on the door, which scared you

You saw that it was him and let him in

“W-what’s wrong?! You scared me!”

“Grab your stuff, we’re going home.”

“But I’m not done yet! I only have a couple more things to do and then I’ll come home. I told you already-”

“I don’t think you fucking heard me!” He yelled and grabbed your hair

“Grab your shit, we are leaving right now.”

He pushed you towards the counter and crossed his arms

You let your breath out in shock but scurry to get your stuff

You’ve never seen him like this and it terrified you

“I have my stuff.”

“Good, let’s go.”

He helped you lock the door and wrapped his arm around your waist

The walk home was silent

You were scared shitless

All you wanted to do was run back into your parents’ house

But he didn’t let you move an inch away from him

Once you got home, he started pushing you around and arguing some more

“Jungkook, I told you this afternoon when you came to visit! I said I have to stay late so I don’t have to stress myself out in the morning!”

“Don’t fucking lie to me! Who were you fucking seeing?!” He screamed, frightening you more

“No one! I swear, no one!” You whimpered

He corned you into your shared room and locked the door

“Jungkook, I swear! Nothing happened!”

He didn’t believe a single word coming out of your mouth

It was like you were talking to a wall

He pushed you onto the bed and stripped you naked

Jungkook pushed two fingers into your cunt and pretended to scoop out cum

“If nothing happened, why is your cunt full of cum?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about! I didn’t have sex with anyone!”

You weren’t very educated about sex, so Jungkook had an advantage

You began apologizing even though you didn’t have sex with anyone

You just wanted peace between you two

“I’m sorry! I didn’t cheat or anything, but I’m sorry if it hurt you! I really am!”

Jungkook slapped you and spat on your face

“Dirty slut. Telling me that you’re not cheating but still apologizing.”

“No! Please, I didn’t do anything!”

Jungkook pulled his cock out and shoved it in without warning

You were still new to sex so when he didn’t let you adjust, you automatically started screaming and crying

“Please, slower!” You cried, holding onto his biceps as he went faster and deeper

“Stop! Please!”

Jungkook loved the sound of his balls clapping against your ass

It honestly made him harder

All night, he was on top, fucking you hard

Your legs were spread apart, tears in your eyes and sweat dripping down your forehead

You looked like a hot mess

And he loved every second of it

“Mmh- Jungkook!”

You squirted around him and had a trembling orgasm

You couldn’t stop releasing your liquids on him and he couldn’t stop pounding you

The bed sheet was soaked by the end of it

He pushed his cock deep inside and came

After Jungkook fell asleep, you cried for while

How were you supposed to tolerate him for the rest of your life?

The next morning

You woke up in severe pain

You lower region was begging for some pain relief

But there was nothing you could do about it

Jungkook was still sleeping next to you

You decided to leave before he wakes up

After getting ready by leaning on everything, you slowly walked to town

When you arrived at the bakery, you saw a big “for sale” sign

You panicked and went inside the store, only to be greeted by your parents

“Mother, father! Why is there a “for sale” sign on the bakery?”

You parents looked at each other in disappointment

“You see, we have to explain the obvious to your daughter. Be grateful that someone willingly married your idiot daughter.” Your father said before walking out

His words did hurt but you cared about the bakery more than your father

“Why’re you selling it, mother? Can you not afford it anymore? Why-”

“Shut up, Y/N! You’re married now, you have wifely duties. You don’t have time for this bakery so the best option is to sell it.”

Your world fell apart right before your eyes

“But mother-”

“Save it. You already made your father upset. I’m warning you now, you don’t want to get on my bad side.”

You cried the whole morning

After you opened the bakery, lots of people gathered in line

All breads, cakes and muffins were going on sale

After you served the people in line, you went up to the tables and took their order

After you served them, a regular customer who was sitting alone gestured you to come over

You went over to the man and asked him if he needed anything

He told you to take a seat and accompany him

Since the crowd died down, you sat down in front of him

“You look a bit stressed and sad. What’s on your mind?”

You were touched by his words

Finally, someone cared about you

You told him you were upset about the bakery closing

He understood and even offered money to help you keep it open

You were flattered but didn’t accept the money

“Money’s not a problem, my parents just don’t want to keep this shop open.”

You talked with this guy for a couple of hours

Although this was your first time talking to him, you talked to him like he was your best friend

When closing time came around, he got up and asked you out on a date

You didn’t know what to do

You were married but you really liked this guy

You were considering saying yes when someone pulled his shoulder back and punched him across the face

“Jungkook! What the hell is wrong with you?!”

“You think I didn’t see that?! I saw it all. I saw you flirting with my wife for three hours straight and then asking her out on a date!”

Jungkook beat the crap out of the guy and pushed him outside

He then came back in the store, looking at you with devil eyes

“Yesterday’s punishment clearly wasn’t enough.”

The entire way home, he was yelling at you, slapping you, spitting on you, pulling your hair, pushing you to the ground and choking you

You were crying the whole time, apologizing over and over

When you arrived home, he seriously had no mercy on you

No foreplay, no lube, no adjusting

Just a raw, thick cock being forced into you

You were begging him to let you go but tonight, nothing was going to stop him

He was moving his hips insanely fast, not giving you enough time to breathe

You were choking on your own sobs

“Jungkook, please no! I’m sorry!”

“Why did you hesitate to deny his offer? You are a married fucking women!” With each word a hard thrust followed, knocking all the air out of you

“Answer me! Is he better than me? Does he take care of you? Does he provide money for you? TELL ME!” He was yelling so loudly, it was making you cry harder

“N-no, he doesn’t. He was just the first person to care about me.” You whispered the last sentence but, Jungkook was able to make it out

“Are you saying that I don’t care about you?”

He got more aggressive and fastened his pace

“Tell me, Y/N! Do you think that I don’t care about you?!”

You couldn’t answer him because you couldn’t catch your breath

He was going too fast and you were crying so hard, you couldn’t breathe

Jungkook noticed how much you were struggling and added onto your struggle by holding your neck down

“Apologize, right now Jeon Y/N!”

You softly apologize but it wasn’t good enough for him

He lifted your legs a little, giving him better access and fucked you till you squirted

This time you sobbed your apology and begged for forgiveness

“I’m so sorry, Jungkook! It’ll never— ah! It’ll never happen again! I’m so sorry! Please for- forgive me for my dumb m-mistake. Please! I’m begging you.” You held onto the bed sheet, praying he would stop

He huskily growled and pushed his cock in deep

“For the next 9 months you’ll be swelling with my baby. Now, everyone can back off.”

He shot his hot cum right into you, filling you up to the rim

Sorry for any mistakes. It’s 3:41am 😄

#jungkook smut #jeon jungkook smut #bts smut #non con #bts yandere #yandere bts #yandere jungkook

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myafterlifeisbetterthenyours · 3 years

Note

I'm reading too many fanfics and today I want something more cute than romantic, so I would like Stella with an S/o to be her personal butler who took care of her during her childhood and adolescence (bonus if S/o used to sing to Stella when she was a kid) . obviously the S / o must have a great preparation to be worthy of taking care of the daughter of the parents who were certainly one of the causes of Stella to be like this

Stella's personal Servant and S/O

You had spent years in preparation for when you would meet your mistress.

It was a common practice amongst the nobility.

You take a child from a lower house, train and raising them to become the personal servant to a child from a higher noble family.

You were of lower stock, your family heavily reliant on Stella's family, and being the youngest of your line, you found yourself chosen to be her servant.

Although the agreement basically surrendered one of there own to a life of servitude, it also brought prestige to there household, while also placing one of there own at the right hand of the next head of a powerful household.

Despite your years of training, you were still increadibly nervous upon meeting her, terrified you'd do something wrong and screw it up.

But much to your surprise, she wasn't some terrifying ice queen who could vapourise you with a glare.

She was just a girl. A young, normal looking noble girl. Seemingly not much older than you.

Your meeting was somewhat awkward, you being unsure how you should interact with her outside of the cold formalities you were taught.

Your relationship was an unusual one.

As while, yes you were her servant, you were also expected to be her closest allie and truest friend.

You were expected to take on every burden she had, to carry and guard them to the death.

A concept that hadn't fully registered in your young mind yet, but despite your age, you quickly acclimated to your new responsibilities.

You had, of course, been give training for your new duty, but much of it was learnt in the field.

You found yourself working into a schedule; wake up before her, get clean, have breakfast before waking her up at 7:30 sharp.

From there you would help her dress, something you were quite flustered about the first time around. Then you accompanied her to breakfast, then to her first lesson of the day.

You were often dismissed during her lessons, returning to her room to tidy up, or have her clothes cleaned.

It took time but eventually you were just as capable at cleaning and serving as any veteran servant of the household.

Now, initially Stella was quite... cold towards you. Treating you not much better than any other servant of the home.

But she did eventually warm to you, starting the night you heard her having a nightmare.

Much to her annoyance you had been moved into the room besides her, giving her 24 hour access to you, and you to her.

So you were easily capable of hearing her toss and turn in bed, her whimpers getting louder and louder. Until she awoke, with a scream.

You instantly shot into action, sliding into her room and pulled her into your embrace.

Holding her to your chest, you did your best to sooth her. Barely being a boy yourself you were quite inexperience with such things.

So you did the only thing you could, you sang to her.

You sung her the song your wet nurse used to sing you when you had a bad dream. Holding her for what felt like hours, gently singing to her until she fell back to sleep.

The next morning she insisted you call her Stella, unlike before when she demand the customary 'Lady' or 'Mistress'.

Not long after that she began addressing you by name. The two of you seeming to enter a level of mutual respect.

Similar events would happen several more times during your youth, each time you sang her the same song, holding her close and soothing her.

You brought up the nightmares to her parents, the two seemingly didn't care. Her parents just coldlt telling you 'They were something she needed to get over herself.'

And her parents weren't the warmest family, both her parents seemed obsessed with there appearances, placing politics over the well bing of there own daughter.

So you made her well-being your top priority, always asking if she was OK or if she wanted to talk.

In preparation for you new duties you had already received extensive training in everything from cleaning to first aid.

But as the the two of you grew, you began getting lessons in far more hands on fields.

As you were expected to be her faithful guardian. You were trained in various forms of combat, with everything from knives, to assault rifles.

Followed by several specialised first aid courses, each one dedicated to a different field of medicine.

You excelled through each course, taking the role as both servant and protector as your own.

Despite being younger then your charge, your mentality quickly matured beyond your years, willing and prepared to fight to the death for your charge.

You fully embraced you postion, putting aside everything you were and giving yourself to your new role, absolutely.

As the two of you grew older, you also grew closer and closer. And due to your special status as her personal servant, having less limitations put on you then a regular servant of the house, you could act as more of a friend to the girl. Acting as a trusted confidant for the girls troubles.

As you matured your skills, both physically and mentally, you learned to better dedicat your new skills to what would most efficiently aid your liege.

While you excelled in your training dedicating your self to the task before you, the main problem you faced was, Stella.

It may seem petty, but Stella being of a higher and more powerful cast meant she grew to tower over you by at least a foot.

Something she was sure to rub in your face.

And it may not seem like that big of a deal, but protecting someone much taller then you, was a constant struggle. As they were far more visible then yourself and could be targeted from angles you weren't able to see.

But you did your absolute best, going above and beyond as her steadfast companion, hapily waiting on her hand a foot.

It seemed like a blink if an eye and the beautiful young lady you once served had grown into a beautiful young woman.

And much to your shame, over the years spent together, you had developed a deep affection for her, an affection that went far beyond friendship.

Of course you would never publicly admit such a thing, your years of training alloweing you to keep such your feelings suppressed. Only allowing your affection to show through in what would be expected of a typical platonic relationship.

When Stella came to the age of 17, her parents decided to send her to an academy famous for its education of young noble women.

The problem was, it was an all girls academy. And you being her private servant, and right hand, the two of you could not be sepperated for such a long period of time.

It took a fair bit of political manoeuvring and more then a few favours to get you in, but by the end of it, you found yourself enrolled right besides her.

You were to attend every class as well as share quarters with Stella. You were not to leave her side unless absolutely necessary.

You were far from the only servant to accompany there mistress.

You found a variety of them, from Imps to hellhounds. You even saw a few succubus amongst them.

But the thing that really stood out, was that you were the only male, even amongst the staff.

Initially life at the academy went fantastic.

Stella, with her confident nature and families status thrived at the academy, easily rising the social ranks, making friends and allies.

The whole thing bringing a great sense of warmth to your black heart.

You stood back and proudly watched as she excelled amongst her peers, only having to step in to aid her in her day to day.

But unfortunately, problems did arise. And much to your shame, they were spawned from you.

Now, you had already received a fair amount of attention from the Student; Stares, love letters, lustful gazes. But you were there for Stella, the affects of there attention quickly dissipated as you focused on Stella.

Now you being a fairly attractive young man, in exceptional shape from years of work and being the only male in a school of a few hundred young hormonal women.

But initially, being Stella's servant stopped anyone from pursuing you, as relations with someone below them was punished severely by both the school and there families.

Unfortunately the question of who you were was quickly raised, Stella without much concern or thought, told them all about your special status as both a noble and a servant.

And that's were the problems really began.

You see, sleeping with another family's servant, was an excellent way to get yourself disowned by your family.

But a fling with a servant, whom was also a fellow noble... that could be tolerated.

You were greatly surprised to find just how tolerant the school was of such behaviour.

It would seem that despite there rather strict policy on student/Staff relations, that being pubished severely.

But the school was unwilling to take serious action against noble children for have relations amongst themselves.

It seemed they allowed the students to let out there rebellious phase in small ways, perhaps a method to help make them into proper nobles.

Needless to say, you had never been so happy you were Stella's servant.

You'd heard how some of them talked about you, and if Stella wasn't your mistress, your quite certain you'd be used as a tool for political gain, regardless how you felt about it.

Ironically, you found Stella becoming far more possessive of you, especially whenever someone began to show interest in you.

Now she had always been possessive of you to a degree, snapping at anyone who dared to treat you poorly or acted like you were supposed to serve them, something that happened quite often amongst nobility.

You liked to think it was her way of marking her territory, all the while showing you that she had your back. And with all the attention you were getting, it only made sense for her to be a bit more possessive.

Adding to your growing shame, seeing Stella becoming such a strong, confident woman had only strengthened your feelings for her.

In your mind, you had kept your feeling for Stella perfectly hidden. Only allowing your affection to show, through your friendly and platonic behaviour.

Apparently you were wrong.

Parties were surprisingly common on the school grounds, with a major party seemingly occurring at least once a month.

Stella being ever the socialite, was of course invited. The young lady flirtaciously telling you were invited as well. Following her to the party, you found a small herd of teens sipping wine from plastic cups, talking amongst themselves.

Playing nobility.

It was fun for the most part.

Everyone was dancing and drinking. And much to your surprise Stella was quite lax when it came to alcohol, drinking more than her fair share.

A little tipsy, she found you, demanding you dance with her.

Now you, on the other hand, did not party. You did not drink, you did not fraternise and you most certainly didn't dance.

You were her guardian, you were supposed to watch over her, not get drunk with her in some random dormroom.

But Stella ordered you, not having the will to refuse her, you complied.

You danced and drank and partied. And for the first time in your life, you let yourself he a teenager.

And you enjoyed it. You enjoyed being with Stella.

The mood quickly soured when, as Stella left to get a drink, some random girl grabbed you by the collar and rather aggressively tried to kiss you.

You were able to hold her back of course, even inebriated you were still strong enough to hold back a drunk teenage girl.

You were freaking out, unable to think of what to do, only for Stella to appear and violently rip her off you, beating the crap out of the her right there infront of all the other party goers.

She screamed at the girl, telling her to never touch what belonged to her again. Before without saying a word, grabbing your hand and dragging you out of the party.

She dragged you into a nearby allyway, ranting and raving about how dare someone touch you, you belonged to her and she was sick of having to remind people.

Her words becoming progressively more possessive, you just half drunkenly stumbling your much taller mistress.

Raising the question of her increasingly possessive language, you saw her entire body shift.

Walking up to you, she pressed her body up against yours, effortlessly pinning you to the wall.

It was pointless to struggle, as even with all your training she was still stronger.

With eyes you had never seen before, she stared into your own and asked if you liked her.

You were both shocked and terrified, you were so sure you had been careful.

You sputtered something out, trying to hide your feelings before she cut you off with a passionate kiss.

She held you close as she told you all about how she knew you liked her, about how she knew you always held yourself back.

But she understood why.

You were left stunned when she told you the reason she knew why, was because she'd been doing the same. She confessed she had fallen for you, but like you, she had kept her feeling secret because such a relationshi wouldn't be "proper"!

But she didn't care anymore.

She was sick of keeping her feelings for you a secret, sick of watching other women get to speak and act freely while she was forced to hold her tongue.

She wanted you and she was going to have you, no matter what anyone thought.

She dragged you back to your dormroom, although it was more like a small apartment before dragging you to her bed.

Sitting above you she asked if you wanted this, unable to think of the right words you just gave her another passionate kiss.

The two of you spent the night together.

Your relationship was kept a secret for the rest of her time in the academy. The two of you agreeing it would be best and with Your position already giving you the best possible excuse to be close together.

Once you both graduated, Stella's parents tried to have an arranged marriage set up for her, hoping to achieve greater prestige for the family.

But much to your surprise, she blatantly refused.

Instead she using her new-found political connections and usurped her parents, taking the family name and the role of head of household as her own.

Her first act, openly declaring your relationship.

You were deeply relieved the outcry was very minimal, contained to only a few already outspoke critics that apposing her anyways.

And so you stood by her ever since. As bother her loyal protector and faithful lover.

Hey hey, this one was a challenge, but I still enjoyed it. If any of you have a request or want to submit a prompt, go right ahead. Check out my master list for what I won't write and go for it. Thank you all for reading.

#helluva boss headcanon #helluva boss #headcanon #x reader #helluva boss x reader #helluva stella #stella #stella x reader

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just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi · 3 years

Text

New Training - Rudy

Note: I was pretty sure I might come back and flesh these trainings out a little more, but didn't have the ideas at the time, so it's a bit spacey. These happen over about 3 days.

Also just keep in mind that Rudy has a very low pain tolerance.

[Masterlist]

TW: pet whump, kidnapped whumpee, conditioning, muzzle, restraints, conditioned whumpee, dehumanization/animalization, manhandling, light mouth whump (noncon mouthwash and sharp muzzles), implied starvation, mind games, broken whumpee mindset,

When Rudy woke, the first thing he noticed was how much his head hurt. One spot in particular on the right side of his forehead was pounding. The next thing he realized was he was muzzled again. Master hadn’t put him in a muzzle in so long - what did he do wrong?

With a jolt, the memories of yesterday came back and he sat up, nearly choking himself on the chain clipped to his collar. He reached up and felt the little lock, whining in fear as he looked around. Tears sprung to his eyes as he felt around the collar and realized it wasn’t his, the bed wasn’t his, the room wasn’t Masters.

“Now you’re awake, sleepy head.”

Panicked, he tried to scurry back but the chain kept him in place. Casey rounded from the otherside of the room, grinning wildly. The whimpers and whines were so impossibly cute, better than he could have ever imagined. The boy was scared now, but he’d soon love Casey. He was so excited, so ready to get started training.

He reached own the pet the boy’s cheek - a gesture of peace and comfort, but the boy pulled away, hands up to tug at the chain. Casey scowled and slapped him.

“Ugh, you know far better than that, Archimedes.”

“No!” Rudy cried out, tugging at the end of the lead.

“Come on, Archimedes,” Casey groaned, pulling the boy back roughly. “Listen to your owner.”

The sharp tug put him off balance and Rudy tripped to the ground, getting up quickly on knees to relieve pressure from his throat. “N-No! Not, not my name, not my Master!” He glared up at the man, shaking but resolute. He knew who he belonged to.

Casey’s blood boiled.

“Stupid pet, you’ll learn better than to speak back to me like that.”

He grabbed the back of the boys’s collar, dragging him up and down the hall. Rudy tried to struggle and plant his feet, but it ended up only choking him. Casey threw him into the small room against the counter and quickly grabbed a bottle sitting on the self. With a firm grip under his jaw, he pried the boy’s mouth open and forcefully poured some of the liquid in.

“Don’t swallow it - or do, if you want to throw up,” he remarked coldly, pressing a hand against Rudy’s mouth to keep it closed. He watched the boy’s eyes get wide, recompense for his disobedience.

The liquid, whatever it was, tasted horrible and sour. It made him gag when it hit the back of his throat, bound hands coming up to try and pry the man’s away to spit it out. Casey pinned his hands down with a knee and pushed him back farther, sink counter digging painfully into his lower back.

Then it started to burn.

It hurt and burned, like it was starting to eat away at his gums and teeth. Rudy whined loudly, eyes begging Casey to let him go. The man was grinning back at him, the expression like a dagger stabbing straight at his heart. He was, he was enjoying this, enjoying seeing him so scared and in pain.

“Tastes bad, doesn’t it? Doesn’t it?" He prompted, shaking him lightly. Rudy panted through his nose and nodded quickly. Please let him spit it out, please. “Bad words get punished, and this is how they’ll be punished. Do you understand, Archimedes?”

Rudy whined, but nodded again. It burned, it hurt his mouth. He wanted it out, out out out.

With a spin, Casey faced him towards the sink before he released him. Rudy quickly spit it out, nearly gagging in the process. Even then, the taste lingered in his mouth. Shaking, he curled over the sink and began to cry again as he felt the man begin to replace the muzzle. His eyes found Casey’s in the mirror for a moment as Rudy considered struggling again. Something about the darkness in his eyes made the pet reconsider.

He didn’t fight as the muzzle was closed, tighter than before. Something sharp sliced against his tongue lightly and he jerked back with a whine. Sharp? A sharp bit?! He could barely even swallow to get rid his mouth of that terrible taste. His eyes pleaded with Casey, who didn’t seem affected by the teary green look.

“There,” said Casey, petting down Rudy’s hair as if nothing happened. “Isn’t that better. Are you going to be a good boy for me now?”

Rudy didn’t know how to answer.

“Hungry, Arch?” Casey asked as he turned from the stove. The boy was at the very end of the lead hanging from the man’s waist, backed up against the wall. The pet shook his head vigorously, hard enough to make the rings on the muzzle chime against each other. Casey huffed a laugh and turned back to his saucepan.

No food then.

Rudy laid in the little dog bed, hands closed away in mittens with a softer muzzle strapped into place. Thankfully, this one didn’t have a bit, but it was still pressure around his face and head. Tears fell, again, and Rudy nuzzled his face into the padding.

He, he still belonged to Master - didn’t he?

He knew he belonged to Master because he was the one who fed him and clothed him and gave him a name and a collar and he stayed in his house. There were other human rules too, that proved he owned him. The chip in his arm and the code on his side and maybe other stuff too - but he didn’t know any of that. He had never had to worry about it.

But now he wasn’t in Master… Mason’s?... he wasn’t in that house, he wasn’t wearing that collar or being taken care of by him. Did, did that mean he belonged to Casey? Was… was it Master Casey? He didn’t know, didn’t know what to think. It was all so confusing.

He wanted to be home so incredibly badly, but didn’t Master Mason say that pets didn’t get wants? They didn’t get to decide what happened to them? They trusted their Master and their Master took care of them. He rolled over to his other side.

But no, because Master Casey (just Casey?) wasn’t following the human rules. Or maybe he was - the pet didn’t know. He couldn’t believe that stealing a pet from the park and shoving them in a trunk counted in human rules, but they weren’t for him to understand. Master Mason had taught him to not question those things and now Master Casey was doing things he didn’t understand and, and....

A sob broke out and the pet pressed farther into the bed, desperate for comfort but not knowing if he was allowed to get it. Or if he was supposed to want it? It hurt to think, everything hurt so much to try and untangle. He wanted someone - anyone - to come along and tell him what to do. To explain it to him, to make the bad feelings go away. That’s what Master Mason had done, he had made the bad feelings go away. Slowly, the pet raised up and peered over the foot of the bed to see Master Casey looking on his phone. He whimpered.

Casey looked up to see the boy absolutely distraught. He let out a sad ‘aww’ and put away his phone to go to him. The pet tired to wipe its eyes with the mittens and sniffled, leaning towards him.

“Here, let’s take these off,” he said, gently releasing the buckles and guiding the mittens away. The pet laid its head on his shoulder and Casey felt his heart lift. He pulled the smaller boy onto the bed with him and held him close. The boy settled into him, obviously accepting as Master and wanting comfort from him.

It was so satisfying.

“There you are, there you are sweetheart. See? I knew you’d figure it out. You’re gonna be such a good boy for me, I just know it. Someday, I’ll find someone to correct your chip and then you’ll really be mine.”

Rudy’s eyes flashed open from where he was nuzzled into the man’s chest. ‘Really’ be his. He wasn’t his. He did belong to Master - Casey was the thief. He tried to keep his breathing slow, to not disturb the man holding him. He need out, he needed to go home, still. Then, he noticed the man starting to breathe slowly, starting to relax. He froze, a dangerous thought growing in his head.

He was falling asleep. Rudy could get away when he was asleep.

It felt like it took so long, but eventually there was a soft snoring coming from above him. Rudy peeked up to see his eyes closed, face slack. Oh so carefully, he pulled away one arm, then another, then eased farther away. He froze again, pulse hammering in his throat, watching to see if the man would stir.

He didn’t.

Holding his breath, Rudy placed both feet on the ground and stood. The floor was mercifully carpet, not producing any noise to get him caught. He took one step, then another, until he was out of the bedroom and into the hall. It was dark, only a forgotten bathroom light to illuminate his path.

As quietly as possible, he crept down until he saw the doors again. He knew from the first time that they were both locked, and that he would have to find another way out.

That’s when he noticed the window above the sink open slightly.

Casey had kept him on a lead the entire time, never letting him get too far away. It had been pure luck he was taken off one that night, and that must have been why he left it open.

Rudy climbed up onto the sink and pushed it open slowly, hoping it wouldn’t be too loud. The fact it wasn’t excited him a bit - until he looked out.

That, that was a long way to the ground.

He gulped and realized he was still wearing the muzzle. With shaky hands, the buckles were eventually worked through and released. He had to take a very deep breath after, never having taken off his own muzzle before. It felt like he was being bad, but it was Casey that put it on him, so he must be allowed.

Laying it down on the counter, Rudy considered the window again. There was grass below, which would be better - right? He looked around for a rope or something to use to lower down, but his anxiety was starting to get the best of him. Casey could wake up at any moment, and he wouldn’t get a chance like that again.

Feeling like his last option, Rudy climbed up onto the counter and put one of his legs through. Breathing hard, he looked one last time to make sure Casey hadn’t woken up.

He put the other leg through and climbed out.

taggg: @whumpingredroses @suspicious-whumping-egg @as-a-matter-of-whump @albino-whumpee

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3wisellamas · 3 years

Text

Giant Sweet Cap’n Cakes Headcanon Masterpost!

(Fun fact, I thought most of these up while on one REALLY long hike. ^^; You can tell I fell for these three pretty hard.)

Music:

-I like the idea that, while the three all share a love of hip hop, glitch hop, electronic music in general, and a little lo-fi for chill times, they all have different tastes outside of those. (Meaning if you pass them the aux cord, they WILL argue!)

-Sweet's actually the biggest audiophile of the group, with by far the most eclectic tastes; he will literally put together playlists that go from dubstep to heavy metal to classical to rap to vaporwave to even country. The others don't really get it, but they're cool with whatever he puts on, and learn a lot of new music from him!

-He also owns an electric guitar, which he just plugs into himself to use as an amp and plays early in the morning to wake the others up if needed (he's the early riser and the other two are night owls...)

-Cap'n's definitely got a more narrow focus than the other two; he likes rap and also R&B, jazz, and even a little swing/electro swing. He's also been caught more than once listening to cheesy romantic pop songs, claiming he's just into them for their potential madamoizel-attracting uses but really he's just a sappy romantic.

-He can also rap, very well in fact, and gets Sweet to beatbox while he freestyles.

-Heck, he's just got a good singing voice in general, helped by having a built-in autotune, and dominates at karaoke!

-K_K also has a really broad range, but stays more towards the electronic end of the spectrum -- melodic dubstep, synthpop, disco, trance, chiptune, DnB, even occasionally puts on straight-up ambient spa music to chill out to (the only genre the other two will NOT tolerate.)

-K_K has also, in the past, set up entire mini-raves just by themselves, complete with glowsticks and everything, while Cap'n and Sweet were out doing whatever. They were...not pleased, when they got back, mostly because they weren't invited. All three got to have one together eventually though.

-Physical media is king in their shop; if it's not on a CD, cassette tape, or a vinyl record (or an 8-track, though they have to dig out their old player for it), they will refuse to play it, and might even ask you to leave. "MP3" is an extremely dirty word to them.

-(In fact, they don't get along too well with the MP3 player-headed robots elsewhere in the city.)

-They are indeed always listening to music on physical media as well -- K_K and Cap'n are their own CD players (though Cap'n's one of those models that's also got a built-in FM radio), while Sweet has a straight-up Walkman.

-(He's also the group's cassette champion, claiming his media of choice is superior to CDs because you can record music on BOTH sides of the tape! The other two just don't have the heart to point out that each side only holds half as much music as a CD, and you don't even have to rewind those...)

-Jury's still out on Hit Clips. Cap'n and Sweet think they're just toys, but K_K genuinely collects and appreciates them and treats them like actual music (it helps that they are only around four seconds long!)

-Believe it or not, the headphones are only decoration, all three actually just...listen to their music entirely within their own heads, though they can also switch to playing it externally on their speakers as well. Perks of being robots! Though, sometimes K_K has his internal volume up too high, and misses things that other people say because of it.

-Sweet also has an input port, and connects himself to his turntable to act as the speakers! The other two are WAY too embarrassed to ask if they can use it as well.

-Sweet can play almost any instrument you throw at him, as long as it's not a woodwind (Surprisingly, he can do brass, since those work on vibration rather than air!). He prefers his guitar or violin when he isn't spinning records on his turntable. Where the other two just enjoy music, he's the actual trained musician.

Voice headcanons:

-Sweet: Kind of deep, bass-y, lots of reverb, a slight tinny audio distortion to it like a low-quality recording that becomes much more pronounced when he gets upset or starts shouting. And since he's a speaker, you can literally feel the vibrations he makes when he's speaking!

-Cap'n: Scout from TF2. I am sorry, but I absolutely cannot get that out of my head for him. XD However, he's actually putting that voice on as an "accent" of sorts, his real voice is actually super autotune-y like K_K's, and it comes out whenever he gets flustered, his pitch only getting higher and higher as it gets worse...

-K_K: Pure autotune, he can just do whatever the hell he wants with his voice -- pitch, tone, whatever, and while he tends to keep it a little higher he can and does change it to fit his mood! He often has a completely different voice every day, but the others are used to it. He also just straight-up vocalizes sound effects (like, the kind that make you go "How did you just make that sound with your mouth?!") and can mimic other people perfectly (though the slight mechanical distortion does give it away). There are absolutely no rules when it comes to K_K's voice.

-They harmonize perfectly whenever they sing together!

Sweet:

-I like to think Sweet's actually the brains of the group; like, not SMART, he just holds their one collective braincell most often. He does any technical work when they're building stuff, like soldering circuits or the occasional programming, and even handles a lot of the actual business operations and pays the bills. The other two also like to follow his lead when it comes to rebellion plans, even if he’s not the official leader.

-That said, though? It's balanced out by him being rather hotheaded and having the shortest temper by a lot. There are REASONS why he's not usually out selling bagels with the others -- he's unfortunately prone to some more "extreme" sales tactics, like hurling half their stock at random passersby until they finally agree to buy some. On the plus side, he's always the first to step up to defend the gang from anything that dares to harm them, and is always on guard.

-He can also hold a heck of a grudge -- don't ever get on his bad side! Cap'n and K_K are mostly immune to this though, if he gets upset with them he works through it by the end of the day. It helps that they can all hug it out.

-He's a bit of a perfectionist, often working overtime to try and get everything they build exactly right. He can get really frustrated when things don't work out the way he plans, or when he can't make sense of a problem, or when Cap'n and K_K are goofing off instead of doing their part, and needs to go blast some loud music and blow off steam.

-He does have a really tough time keeping his balance, since his head is a bit heavier than the rest of his body, but he takes tripping over his own feet constantly in stride. The biggest problem he has is with dancing -- while he'll join in with the others on occasion, he can't match their more acrobatic moves and sticks more to actually PLAYING the music they're dancing to.

-He's also really, really unlucky, just in general. He actually considers the other two his good luck charms, since they help him out whenever he trips or gets into a bad spot!

-He's the fashionista of the group, surprisingly. It's difficult for him to find clothes that fit his body, so he tends to get a little creative with it and has a whole closet full of different stuff! And since Cap'n is roughly the same size they'll occasionally swap jackets.

Cap’n:

-Cap'n actually has managed to score a handful of dates with girls in the past! However, NONE of them went well, and only one actually made it to the second date (only to break up right in the middle of it), so he always ends up returning home heartbroken and in tears. Sweet and K_K, by this point just ready for it whenever they hear that he's going out that night, always dry him off before he shorts himself out, take him to bed and cuddle with him (platonically, I don't see them as brothers but I also don't see them as having that conversation until Cap'n's ready, which he clearly is NOT), remind him that it doesn't hurt forever and he isn't unlovable and that he'll find someone eventually, etc.

-They have sat him down multiple times to try and gently suggest to Cap'n that he might just not be into women? And that he’s actually turning them off by trying so hard? To which he's always just like "No, of course not. I'm straight. Love the ladies. Totally. Oh no they didn't catch me checkin' out that one dude earlier did they? Is that what this is about?!"

-(Basically, Cap'n is just a hopeless romantic in love with the idea of being in love, but is absolutely clueless as to how it works or what he actually wants, and his best buds are always there to catch him when he falls. ;v; )

-The glasses are prescription -- he's SUPER nearsighted, a hardware glitch he refuses to fix. Sometimes when he's working on something close up he'll take them off, panicking when he can't find them afterwards, only to have the others point out that they're just on his head. He’s also got non-tinted glasses, but you will not catch him DEAD wearing those unless it’s an absolute emergency.

-This dude is SUPREMELY insecure with himself. Like, his rather questionable fixation on romance aside, he basically runs off of others' validation, the "cool" persona he's spent much of his life building up being how he hides the fact that he isn't really sure who he is, or what he wants to do with his life, or what he's even good for -- the others have learned to check on him now and then whenever he hides away in the back of the shop, since he can slip into some pretty dark places when left alone to sulk. It took a long time for him to open up even to them to share his feelings, and sometimes still has doubts about whether they or anyone else really care about him as more than just The Smooth One...

-He's the only one of the three to actually enjoy the occasional silence, especially when he's trying to think, or whenever he's upset. So, his headphones also serve a dual purpose -- they're noise-cancelling!

-He's the video guy, carrying around a small camcorder and constantly trying to record the group's activities, to put together into music videos! He also just likes to record himself doing stupid stunts for posterity, though K_K just takes these and makes (affectionate) blooper reels.

-Cap'n is not his real name, similar to K_K. However, unlike K_K, he refuses to say what it is, just that it's embarrassing.

K_K:

-K_K has a bad habit of just completely zoning out when he gets into his music, getting completely lost in the groove and needing to be pulled back to reality. It's not a bad thing during jam sessions, but at work, or in the middle of a battle...not so much.

-He kind of needs to have some kind of music going at all times -- silence drives him absolutely CRAZY! Though, because he gets distracted by his own music, he then misses out on entire conversations, only tuning back in towards the end. Sometimes the other two have to repeat or summarize what they just said for him.

-He knows sign language, and taught the others to use it. They're able to communicate reasonably well no matter how loud their shop gets, or on days when K_K isn't able to form words properly (he's just shy, and even when he isn't he gets tongue-tied a LOT).

-He's easily the best dancer of the three, and uses his extendable body to get really creative with his moves! He even knows a little ballroom, somehow, which he'll pull out sometimes to make the others laugh.

-(Seriously, K_K CANNOT stand to see Sweet or Cap'n not smiling. He'll do anything to keep the group's spirits up, usually cracking jokes during a scrap project or doing little favors, and they appreciate all his efforts!)

-K_K has the WORST sleep cycle, ever. If you let him, he will stay up all night working or partying, finally going to bed at 6AM, and will then sleep until 6PM if the others don't wake him up at some point. If they know he was up really late they'll let him sleep in a little, but he's often pretty sleep-deprived and running solely on sugar and caffeine, which doesn't help his natural loopiness.

-He is a VERY physical guy. Seriously, he will just scoop up and hold Sweet or Cap'n like a cat every five minutes; at first they were just like "Oh. Okay. We're hugging now I guess," but after a while they got more used to it and even anticipate when K_K is going to do it. And he also initiates tons of snuggles and gives piggyback rides whenever one of his bandmates (usually Sweet) requests.

-K_K actually scrapbooks, collecting pictures and little mementos of places he and the others have gone and things they've done. After the library fountain is sealed, he pulls them out to show everyone else from Cyber City and reminisce about home.

-It's very hard to make K_K angry, since he tends to stay super chill and brushes off almost everything. But, on those very, very rare occasions when something does get under his metal outer casing, he'll go full-on silent treatment, not speaking to anyone for up to a week as he sulks and stomps around the junk shop, and even refuses to play any music! And no amount of sweets or hugs or cheering up will bring him out of it, either; the other two have learned to just wait him out and let him have his space, letting him come to them when he's finally ready to talk about it.

Misc:

-Though all three love everything sweet, K_K's the only one who really goes overboard with it, making whole meals out of candy. Sweet, ironically enough, actually prefers more salty/savory snacks, while the less is said about Cap'n's hot sauce addiction, the better.

-Okay, actually, I will say more about it. Cap'n loves spicy food in general, and literally drinks tabasco sauce right from the bottle. However, he's got a bad habit of daring himself to eat hotter and hotter stuff, ESPECIALLY if someone is watching, and can easily get in WAY over his head before begging for milk.

-They also all totally drink battery acid like Queen.

-Heck, being both Darkners and robots, they can really eat literally anything. Normal food, milk, oil, batteries, gallons of pure sugar, toothpaste, moss, glitter (NEVER let K_K get hold of any though, he gets lost in the sauce), broken glass, etc, and of course their own deep-fried CDs. Only thing they can't do is water, since, you know, robots.

-With a lot of the aesthetics of Cyber City being close to turn-of-the millennium and early 2000s (CDs and boomboxes, popup ads, wired mice, Queen theorized to be one of those see-through iMacs, EVERYTHING about Spamton), I like the idea that the boys DO NOT have smartphones, and if you handed them one they'd have no clue how to use it or what to do with it. But they do have cell phones: Sweet's got an old flip phone covered in stickers (courtesy of K_K), Cap'n splurged for one of those that slide open and with a camera (he set his background to a tiny, grainy photo of the three of them!), and K_K has one of those indestructible Nokia bricks, that Sweet got him after he kept breaking all his other ones. They can all text, but that's about as high-tech as they get.

-Same with tablets or newer computers in general, they might share one tiny netbook at most. Cap’n never remembers to log out of his Dark World dating profile, so the others will snoop or post embarrassing things to it.

-They're really, really durable, even without milk -- they're made of 90s plastic and electronics, so it takes a LOT to take one of them down! Plus, they regularly repair each other back at the shop (it took a LONG time for them to gain enough trust to physically open and work on each other), so as long as at least one's left to drag the other two to safety they'll be just fine.

-However, if they get splashed with water, caught in the rain, or worse, drowned, they will short out, or shut down on the spot to prevent damage. Once they completely dry out, though, they'll start right back up, no worse for wear. When only one of them gets waterlogged the other two will break out the hair dryers to dry them out faster, or even pop them into the oven in a pan of rice like an iPod that got dropped in the toilet...

Finally, backstory?

-Cap'n and K_K met first -- maybe both as new recruits to another, much less savory gang of music equipment robots, and bonded as a result of being put upon by the more established members (Cap'n probably even had to defend K_K more than once when his inattentiveness got him into trouble!) But, they both had enough one day, and decided to break off and form their own thing, making music and selling CD bagels to support themselves.

-Sweet, meanwhile, has the complete opposite background, coming from a rich and important family of musicians in Cyber City who regularly entertained Queen in her mansion (hence why he always used to get sweets from her!) But, he was kind of the black sheep, preferring his own style of music, and decided to strike out on his own as a street musician instead.

-They met when Cap'n and K_K accidentally set up to sell bagels on Sweet's usual corner, and he battled them to reclaim his turf. But, they were evenly-matched (even two-to-one; Sweet's definitely the strongest of the trio!), and impressed each other with both their fighting and musical skills, so Sweet decided to join their tiny group, and thus Sweet Cap'n Cakes was formed.

-After the whole situation with Queen is resolved, SCC turns their rebellion into an anti-DRM kind of thing? Nobody can hold back the music, man!

#deltarune #sweet cap'n cakes #deltarune sweet #deltarune cap'n #deltarune k_k #sweet #cap'n #k_k #emheadcanons

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marmaligne · 3 years

Note

Hello! Can I have some hc with a protective mama Reader with Naib, Helena and Bane. They are my precious baby. I haven't play this game since season 13 and I miss them so much ahhhhhhh 😭😭. Thank you, have a nice day ❤❤🌷 (sr, my English is not good)

✨ Your English is wonderful dear ✨

[Naib Subedar, Helena Adams, Gamekeeper] S/O Is Overprotective

✨ As a reminder, my works will always include gn!reader unless specified by the requester! ✨

———————————————————————

[Naib Subedar]:

* You had been at the manor for quite awhile now, and were a rather nice person, getting along with most other survivors, and even some of the hunters to boot.

* It was quite surprising actually. You’d walked in the first day with a tough-guy attitude and gruff personality, and you didn’t seem like a very approachable person.

* Then, some survivors such as Victor and Emily started worming their way into your heart. Liam [Lucky Guy] and Norton were some of the first people to offer you a seat at the dinner table, and from then on you were one of them.

* You had scars, though most could tell they were more physical than emotional, from some sidejobs you used to complete for a gang on White Sand Street—robbing people and competing in fights with rivals.

* You quickly learned that most people fought back. Rival gangs always intruded on your own territory, and you were always left on guard, defending the last remnants of your livelihood and your sanity.

* Maybe that’s why you’re so protective over your things. Never letting anyone enter your room, never letting anyone see the pain you hide. Opening up to people enough to make allies, but never enough to show secrets.

* Now Naib…. Naib helped you out a lot. It seemed he understood you, far more than others. For some reason, he was always there for you, watching your back when needed, acting like a shield at times—sometimes literally.

* You never really understood at first, how he seemed to know you so well. From what you knew, he came from halfway cross the world, from Nepal, in India—a child, a soldier, a weapon.

* You guessed his life was rather similar, and assumed he’d come to the manor for quite the same reasons but, it was hard to see through the scowl on his face.

* At some point, you began to recognize the signs, the irritation, the avoidance. You recognized the silence, and the stiffness that came from Naib when he ate and smiled and nodded at their questions. You saw the signs of a brother, somebody just as lost and broken as you were.

* Children in the bodies of adults, forced to live life too fast and too furiously. Damaged and done in, waiting for someone to save them, but too scared to cry for help.

* Unwilling to hurt others again, unwilling to change.

* You grew wary—observant—of him eventually. You joined in more matches with him as teammate, and sat next to him often at dinner. When you noticed he didn’t eat as much, you grunted in concern. When he fell asleep in odd places, you’d bring him a blanket.

* It got to the point where he found out about your help, and tried to dissuade you from wasting your time.

* You never really listened. In fact, your worries only increased. Others might not have recognized, but you saw the signs of fatigue and death written in the lines of his face. You’d seen it every day back on White Sand.

* He gave up on making you give up, tired of attempted persuasions. Eventually began returning the favours—Naib is the type to have a ‘you watch my back, I’ll watch yours’ mentality.

* Everything you’d do for him is returned in kind. It annoyed the rest of the manor to no end because the giving and receiving eventually reached limits unheard of.

* You’d throw yourself on a rocket chair to save him, and next game you’d have your own personal bodyguard tracking your every move.

* He’d never admit it, but he appreciates all you do for him, and hopes you appreciate his efforts in making your life a little better too.

* Though your protective tendencies know no bounds, he hopes you’re a little more cautious with throwing your life on the line for him like that. This is a death game after all, be more careful…. please?

* At some point, the whole manor hopes you two could just get together and kiss it out in some storage closet. If you’re dating, what’s the need to be so consistent in you’re protective tendencies? Then you’ll always be together, which means nothing can ever happen to either of you!

* To be fair, that’s what most of them thought until an incident after the confession, where Naib wouldn’t let you out of the medical ward for a week due to a few hairline fractures.

* Please Naib! Emily begs you to let her use the examination table! You’ve hogged it for 5 days and she needs it to identify the infection spreading on Aesop’s leg! Vera broke her nose! William sprinted into the gymnasium wall and shattered his kneecaps! Please leave!

* You once set fire to a couch because Naib stubbed his toe on it.

* Please stop it you two, Freddy can’t budget for anymore furniture, and we’re fresh out of chairs.

———————————————————————

[Helena Adams]:

* Oops! Oh no her glasses! Aww shucks, Norton knocked them right off her face and onto the hardwood floor. She can’t find them because she can’t see, whatever shall she do?

* [S/o]! Please, she needs your help!

* You come in running with a pair of pliers, five bottles of anti-grease spray, and a box of extra lenses and a screwdriver.

* Oh how wonderful! You fixed her glasses—again—and saved her from the task of shuffling herself on all fours looking for them! Her hero!

* Helena…. praises you to say the least. You’re her best friend, her confidante, her…. big and strong, sometimes dumb partner!

* She adores everything you do for her, and tries equally as hard to do things for you that make your life necessarily easier, though it’s harder with her condition.

* She met you around the same time as everybody else, during your first days in the manor. Really, she didn’t actually know you were there until she bumped into a voice she didn’t recognize and became surprised.

* You quickly learned about her blindness, and made it your goal to form a friendship with her based on your willingness to help her around and get closer to her—she was very kind after all.

* Your protectiveness stemmed from the inherent feeling of a need to help guide and provide for Helena, much like a spouse would… jk, unless 👀….

* At some points, you were berated by her for your incessant protections, most of which made her feel highly dependent, which she didn’t like.

* She liked the feeling of being independent of others and being recognized as an autonomous, capable being. Especially considering what she came there for, it was a blow to her pride to be led around and pushed aside all the time.

* When she revealed these feelings to you, you had surprisingly promised her to cease in most areas of monitoring—however you still consistently check up on her—and settled into the realm of a relationship with her.

* Helena meets somebody who respects her opinions + acknowledges her intellect + isn’t a dingy asshole? Sign her up and slap on a ring, she’s marrying this person (eventually).

* She knows that your tendencies stem from a place of need and want, and tolerates most of them. Deep down, she likes being taken care of by someone who knows she can take care of herself. She really does love you.

* When you’re actually in a relationship with each other, you make sure to watch each others backs, more so you than Helena (because she can’t ‘watch’ per say), but you get the point.

* There was once an incident in a duo’s match where Helena became stranded on the Lakeside Fishing map. The terrain is rough, with piles of fish everywhere, randomly placed boxes and walls, and the barrels are bad enough when they don’t form a blockade.

* Her navigational skills, as good as they are with all her previous experience and staff, couldn’t for the life of her figure out how to move her way around a mess of box paths, pallets, and fishing stands.

* Most other survivors were occupied or dead—it had been a hard match against Jack the Ripper and Guard 26—and she was barred from reaching any form of help.

* So she screamed your name as loud as she possibly could across the map, and ended up attracting the attention of BonBon instead. During those moments where she could hear his clanks and heavy metalloid footsteps stalking towards her, the tick of a time bomb in hand, she heard a screech in the distance.

* A fierce battlecry—you came raging from around a windmill, propelled by William’s football and packing heat with a flare gun. BonBon, now stunned twice, stood there in astonishment, before chasing after you, who had grabbed Helena in your arms, running off at full speed.

* Your stamina bar, indicated by a small tab on your character, was running low, and you wouldn’t be able to run at full speed for another minute or two, having used your ability to buy time. Stopping near a closet, you lean down to place Helena on her feet, telling her to hide.

* Her blood trail was invisible from not actually having run anywhere, and she did as you said, making you promise to come get her when it was safe.

* You gave her a smirk and a small nod, assuring her that you would, before leaning in for a peck on the forehead as you shoved her into the locker.

* If only you could see her flushed in embarrassment.

* Leaving her to fangirl in the locker, you form a decoy in your arms—result of your max rescuer ability—and ran off once more, taking off around a corner just as Guard 26 reached your previous location, chasing after you and ‘Helena’ in hopes of landing two more kills.

———————————————————————

[Bane the Gamekeeper]:

* How does it feel to love a deerman? Good? Okay!

* Bane as you know is a little…. rough around the edges so-to-speak, and he has a lot of edges.

* Once you get around all the hooks, chains, and bear traps, and beneath that creepy-looking deer head of his, he really is such a sweet guy!

* At least you think so. In reality, he still acts like a complete dick to everybody else, and only shows his soft side around you, but that’s because he knows he can trust you with his lands, animals, and secrets! All those others out there only wish to hurt what he—you—have, and he’ll make them pay for it.

* Honestly, in order for him to have fallen for you so hard to have let his guard down around you, you probably would have had to be at your most vulnerable point in life, or a hunter yourself. Like a scared prey animal, uncertain of its future, waiting for something to happen, and somebody to help, or a huge predator, ready to strike out at any moment.

* Once you worm your way into his cold dead heart, there’s no way out for you. He’ll keep you close, as he doesn’t want you to be poached away like his precious animal friends from the past. He knows how cruel humanity can be sometimes.

* When you come to find out about his less-than-kind history, it’s all you can do to pity him. Your sympathy knows no bounds, and you become clingier, though he quite honestly likes it.

* You don’t want what happened to him to occur again, and with all these other traitors and murderers in the manor, you’re afraid of what the others could do.

* You keep to his side a lot more, take walks with him in the garden, and enjoy tranquil picnics from time-to-time on Lakeside. Anything to keep him close to you and away from all the pain.

* Bane can obviously see what your doing, and noticing that your protectiveness doesn’t yet border on the insane, he allows you to continue in your devotions.

* It’s honestly sweet sometimes how you both adore each other so much, even if you know that one day one or both of you will have to leave. Whether it be through death, disappearance, or another means such as escape is a question of time, and one that neither of you know the answer to.

* If you’re also a hunter, than both of you know that while you two are happier now than either of you were in life, that your individual deaths and worths will eventually determine your fates—whether that be a happy afterlife, or an eternity of endless wandering.

* It’s well known that you’ll both disappear the day the game ends, your souls being put to rest as they should’ve been however long ago. Until then however, you’ll continue to hold on to and vehemently protect the relationship the two of you have, and you’ll fight until your soul vanishes from the earth for what you have to remain that way.

* Now, if you’re a survivor, this is where the relationship can be a bit difficult.

* Avidly defending the actions of your boyfriend during and after a match to the rest of your survivor buddies isn’t a very good look for you, or your reputation. It’s been many times where you’ve almost been chased out of the dining room because somebody was pissed at you for costing them the match, or being the only one spared instead of convincing Bane for a win or tie.

* As they say, if you can’t beat em’, join em’. Some survivors, such as William, Kreacher, and Freddy, have more than once suggested that if you loved a hunter so much, you should become one to be with him. Dating the undead almost crosses the line of what is humane. Aesop thinks you’re kind of cool.

* The hunters over on Bane’s side hate you more. Are convinced that you’re the sole reason that Bane goes friendly sometimes (even in matches without you in them), and that your relationship takes away from his brutal and violent persona and nature.

* Violetta and Michiko are the most tolerant of you, mainly because you gifted them silk and a hand fan for Christmas once when they wished for them in their letters.

* All-in-all, basically everyone blames you, but you keep going forward because who cares about all the nasty bi*ches in the world, am I right?

* Once, to prove the integrity and devotion of your relationship, you set Freddy’s room on fire and locked Kreacher in a closet. You looked Bane directly in the eyes and kneeling before him stated, “I have committed arson for you m’lord.”

* You couldn’t see it because of his deerish head and all, but Bane really went “Heart eyes motherf*cker.” on you in that moment.

* You love animals and set things on fire to prove your loyalty to him? Ticket for one please, he’s riding the simp train all the way to the station.

* Just, please don’t accidentally burn down the manor, he wants to spend as much time with you as possible before he disappears.

* Also don’t joke around with your life, it’s too precious, even when you tackle your own teammate or risk getting hit by Ganji’s cricket ball to save him from being stunned.

* He doesn’t want you dying before he does—has already he supposes—or disappearing without a trace.

* You promise you’ll stick with him until the day you finally leave this wretched place.

———————————————————————

✨ Hope you enjoyed ✨

#gaming #idv #idv blog #idv x reader #idv fanfic #idv headcanons #idv imagines #writing #identity 5 #identity v #identity v naib #naib x reader #naib subedar #idv helena #idv helena x reader #mindseye x reader #identity v gamekeeper #gamekeeper x reader

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the-sole-macgyver · 3 years

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Can i request a companions react where Sole has a pet goose that doesn't like them (the companion) and will chase them around but Sole just finds it hilarious? Bonus points if a companion gets treed by the goose

Nice prompt, the games really fun- real geese not so much

Prompt:It’s a lovely morning in the Commonwealth, and Sole has a horrible goose

Excluded companions:None

Note: if there are any characters, ie: faction leaders or let’s say synth!Codsworth that anyone would like to be included please feel free to ask!

Warnings:shenanigans of the fowl kind, swearing, threats of violence, goose-typical violence under cut

Cait:She’s always thought that the Swans..clothing of choice was a bit dainty looking for such a fucking big and nasty behemoth of a super mutant, but after meeting “Morrigan” she’s pretty sure the Swans getup was spot on, because Sole’s bird was also a big nasty bastard that would kill anyone who came near it if it could. She threatens to cook it whenever it trys to chase her and Sole generally has too keep them separated because they're fairly sure Cait will go through with it if given the opportunity. Both Cait and the goose are instantly hostile when they see each other.

Codsworth: He’s known of “Beatrix” since before the bombs fell, and he’s not ashamed to admit he’d wished the bird had went up in flames like the rest of the world around him. Alas; someway, somehow, Beatrix stood before him alongside his beloved sir/ma'am once more: all pristine white feathers and seething rage aimed at the goose his chrome paint still faintly reflected back at it, his thrusters still vaguely emulating hissing, and as the beast known as Beatrix reared back, mouth open and screeching Codsworth once again resigned himself to being pecked and screamed at, while his beloved sir/ma’am laughed, cruelly. Whenever he sees the wretched thing make its way back to Sanctuary he tries to make sure he’s on the other side of the settlement.

Curie:She’d never met a real goose before Sole found her and at this point she kind of wished that she never had met the bird, or at least if she had never taken that blood sample- because apparently geese held grudges for life, and they can live for over 20 years. She had only wanted to help the animal, testing its blood to make sure the radiation wasn't effecting it too badly, but apparently it wanted its blood back and if it couldn’t get it back it would take hers- Sole insisted she was fine, but seeing that thing charge at her was quite intimidating, and so she had no plans on going near it ever again, thank you very much. If she does accidentally cross its path she dashes to the nearest building and locks the door until it leaves.

Deacon: When Sole had told him that he couldn't buy the love of the funny, waddly pre-war bird they called a goose with Sugar Bombs he didn’t believe them, after all, it seemed pretty tame. That was his first mistake, and also what landed him half way up a tree in Sanctuary of all places, dangling just out of reach from the Hell Bird with the call of a bomb siren and a mouth full of teeth, screaming for Sole to rescue him but all the traitor was doing was laughing. He’s stuck up a tree above the jaws of death and they're laughing at him. Later he tries approaching it with different methods and in different disguises- unfortunately they never work, Sole says it recognizes his shades, he says it’s an Institute spy out for him and only him. It’s a silly, running joke they have, which, incidentally, he feels like whenever the animal decides to give chase.

Dogmeat:He does not like Soles other animal. It doesn't chase him but it does hiss and go to peck him when he scampers past it. Sole will chuckle and give him reassuring head pats, which are very good- but that thing is no friend and he wont be tricked into believing it is.

John Hancock: He’s reclining on his couch in his State House when Soles resident attack bird decides to go in for the kill. It charges, he panics and grabs it by the neck before it can reach his face and do anymore damage, now hes got an arm full of evil and a Vault dweller laughing their ass off in the doorway, he’d probably laugh too- except the birds stronger than it looks and he’s kinda struggling not to be mauled or resort to stabbing his good friends beloved, if malevolent, pet. When sole finally wrangles the devil off of him he starts to notice the neighborhood watch give the creature a wide berth whenever it waddles its way into town. In fact the only person it seams to tolerate other than Sole is Fahrenheit, surprisingly.

Nick Valentine: He vaugly remembers what a Goose is- old Nick used to prefer them over Turkey for Christmas- and he can understand why his appearance might freak the pampered pre-war creature out, but did it really have to attack him every damn time it saw him? He’d think the lousy thing had a vendetta against him, except it did that to everyone who dared cross its path, he’ll never admit out loud that he got a kick out of seeing it terrorize Myrna- loudly smacking the chained cans around with its beak, unfurling its wings and hissing whenever she tired shooing it away. Later he’ll question Sole about why- out of all the possible pre-war animals they could have picked from- why did they have to chose a goose?

Danse: Seeing a fully grown man in full power armor try to run away from a 3kg bird on the war path was the highlight of Sole’s week, seeing him fall over a melon patch- the same one the bird was apparently guarding- in his mad dash for freedom almost had Sole pass out from laughing so hard, when they finally gather themselves enough to assist the paladin he’s red from embarrassment and doesn’t talk to them until the bird is removed from his immediate vicinity, and even then it takes an hour to get a word out of him, he requests that Sole keep their “feral animal” away from the Prydwen, least it knocks someone off the railing or worse- attack Elder Maxson.

Piper: She’d been threatened, she’d been poisoned, she’d experienced attempts on her life and reputation since becoming a reporter. But nothing rattled her quiet like Sole’s relic of an animal companion, its weird elongated neck, those beady soulless eyes, the fact that it could apparently smell fear because it honed in on her like a missile whenever it was in range- it was always a mad dash to put anything or anyone between her and it, soles laughing never helped one bit. She writes a small article on the dangers of owning poultry out of spite and outright refuses to let Nat near it.

Preston:He’d forever be grateful to Sole for all they had done for the Minutemen and the Commonwealth, and if that meant he had to face “Guinevere” from time to time than so be it- this is what he tells himself, what really happens is he usually sees the bird before it sees him and starts running in the opposite direction, unfortunately his sudden movements usually catch said birds attention and it gives chase, hissing as it gains on him like some sort of demon, when it inevitably catches up to him it usually takes him to the ground where he loses his hat, if it doesn't manage to take him down he’s learned that it can’t climb (but it can swim, the water is not a safe place), and there are many trees around Sanctuary, one of which he usually ends up in, waiting for the thing to loose interest and leave (preferably permanently), this is a common occurrence, so common that he has to frequently change his patrol route, because if he doesn't the bird ends up figuring it out and waits in ambush for him, he’d honestly rather deal with raiders.

MacCready: When he first meets the bird he bends down to greet it, as is custom with other small domestic animals. Unfortunately Soles evil, horrible pet takes it as a threat and then goes for his eyes. He screams, flailing back. It fucking hisses. All trust in new animals is lost that day, and now he has more than just the Gunners to look out for, because the “goose” always seems to have its sights set on him. He walks on eggshells around the bird and, even though Sole says it only attacks him because it sees his tension as a threat, he can’t bring himself to let his guard down around it. Ever. He swears that it looks at him funny, like it’s plotting something, probably his untimely death.

Strong: He threatens to stomp on it when it hisses at him, his threatening stance only serves to enrage the creature more. It earns his respect, he has never seen anything channel the amount of rage this tiny monster does, he doesn't understand why Sole finds it so amusing that he and the screaming ball of hate get along so “well”.

X6-88:When he first sees “Dolorous” he has to wonder if the Institute had created the thing, when Sole tells him that it was frozen alongside them and their family he can’t help but wonder why a bird of all things was allowed a place in a vault over a potential human, and when he finally meets Soles pet he thinks he understands why they decided to put it on ice- to keep it locked away from the outside world where it couldn’t hurt anyone anymore. He uses the Institute’s standard non-lethal defensive tactics, but still ends up with a face full of feathers and ears full of Sole’s obnoxious laughter- he did manage to throw the bird off a roof once, only to find out that despite its size it could fly really really well, Sole didn’t talk to him for a week after that and he’s sure in that week the bird kept shooting him smug looks. Sole’s not allowed to bring it into the Institute.

Ada: She just kind of idles there unsure of what to do whenever the goose decides to attack her, at least it doesn't do any damage and it wears itself out eventually, she doesn't know why Sole finds it so funny. Shes tried offering it scrap as a truce but so far nothing has prevailed, the goose still attacks.

Old Longfellow:He’s seen some messed up things in the fog in his time, it does things to creature and people- takes the fear right out of them and replaces it with something hungry and manic, but, somehow Sole’s pet bird manages to put that lost fear right back in them, it’s call carrying better in the dense air than most others, giving it a booming eerie quality that has the likes of wolves and trappers scampering away, those that are brave enough to investigate are blindsided by a pure white bird that blends so well into the fog that you can barely see it in front of you- all of these qualities he’d be grateful for, makes his job a lot easier, he just wished the thing would stop attacking his legs every time he talked, Sole says its because the fog has it tense and all the new things has it wound up, but he thinks it’s just an asshole.

Porter Gage: He threatens to shoot the thing and Sole threatens to punch his teeth in if he did. So now he’s stuck with another animal themed lunatic, except this one really is an animal and it’s only a lunatic around him, as it seems to love the shit out of Sole. He hates that fucking bird. When the Overboss isn’t looking he glares at the bird and he swears it glares right back but that might just be his own bias on how much he does not like the animal, no matter how loud Mason sings its praises- out of fear he bets.

Addendum:I do not have a beta reader and I am dyslexic, I do proof read everything but am bound to make mistakes- and I would like to apologise in advance for any I have missed.

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ibijau · 3 years

Text

Forbidden love pt5 / on AO3

Lan Xichen's first idea, upon learning that Wei Wuxian had returned to the world of the living, was that he must have done so through cruel and evil means. That possibility was considered, and quickly dismissed. Lan Qiren knew who his guest was, and he would never have tolerated the presence of a dark spirit inside the Cloud Recesses, least of all that particular one.

Guessing the reason for his silence, Wei Wuxian grinned awkwardly.

"Yes, you might wonder about this," he said gesturing at himself but careful not to wake the child sleeping on his lap. "I didn't steal this body, it was gifted to me. Against my will, might I add. That Mo Xuanyu kid was pushed into giving up his life, so I could be brought back and help some other kid named Xue Yang make sense of my own damn research."

That Xue Yang would be involved in whatever was happening surprised Lan Xichen very little. That boy and the work he'd done to decipher Wei Wuxian's notes were what had started this entire mess.

“Much as your inventions have increased their fortune,” Lan Xichen said, “I find it hard to believe the Jins would want you back.”

His eyes fell on Jin Ling as he said so, and to his credit, Wei Wuxian’s expression turned sombre at the reminder of what his actions had cost Lanling Jin.

“The Jins don’t know that I’m alive. Poor Mo Xuanyu didn’t have friends it seems, so nobody realised the change. And Xue Yang didn’t tell anyone. Even if Mo Xuanyu wasn’t very popular, I think Jin Guangshan might have taken offence if he’d realised that one of his bastards died to revive the man who killed his heir. It was our little secret, Xue Yang and I.”

“How long ago were you brought back?”

Wei Wuxian paused for a moment as he tried to remember.

“About a month, I’d say. We spent most of that stuck in a secret room where Xue Yang worked, so it was hard to tell how much time passed, at least until they sent us away a week ago.”

Saying this, Wei Wuxian glanced again at Jin ling, this time with an air of concern.

“I wasn’t given details at first,” he explained. “Just that Xue Yang, me, and some Jin disciples were to take Jin Ling to a secret location and keep him safe. I hadn’t really heard about their trouble with the Nie at that point, because Xue Yang didn't care about that. But the Jin disciples were a chatty bunch and I was able to get some news through them… and to guess the parts they weren't talking about.”

“Jin Ling really wasn’t kidnapped then,” Lan Xichen realised. “I knew da-ge would never have done that. Even at his worst, he would not harm a child.”

“But others might,” Wei Wuxian retorted, glancing at Lan Qiren, who appeared to have heard that whole story before. “See, our official instructions to keep Jin Ling hidden. But then, both those Jin disciples and Xue Yang were each given another set of secret instructions. I heard about Xue Yang’s first, but I think you’ll prefer to hear the other ones before. The Jin disciples were told that if other sects realised Jin Ling hadn’t been taken away by the Nie, Xue Yang was to be killed and blamed for the incident while I, or rather Xuanyu, would pretend to have been taken by force as well, and act as a witness.”

That was a cunning plan, and Lan Xichen wondered if it didn’t bear the mark of Jin Guangyao’s cleverness. After all, if Xue Yang died, there was much that might be blamed on him. The Jins might even try to make peace offerings to Qinghe Nie by showing they had finally done what Nie Mingjue had asked them to do for months now. Nie Mingjue would refuse. He would have refused if he had been in a healthy state of mind, too smart not to see this for a ruse, and he would refuse in his current state, too unwell to hear about peace. That might rally more sects to Lanlin Jin’s side, if Jin Guangshan and his son navigated the situation well and told everyone that Nie Mingjue was once more unreasonable.

It would even work on the Lan elders, too eager for peace to look at its cost.

“Now that’s bad enough,” Wei Wuxian agreed. “But Xue Yang had his own orders., in case the situation between Lanling and Qinghe got to a stalemate. He was told he’d need to kill all our guards, then kill Jin Ling and display his body in as awful a manner as possible, and in a way that would give the impression Qinghe Nie was responsible for it. He found it so funny he thought he’d share that plan with me, since he expected I’d have little love for my nephew.”

Feeling faint, Lan Xichen stumbled a few feet and had to lean against the nearest wall for fear he would collapse.

“Who gave that order?” he asked, already knowing the answer.

“The one man who’d have everything to gain from being rid of Jin Guangshan’s heir,” Wei Wuxian answered. “And who most desperately needs for Qinghe Nie to be seen as evil, so people forget that he caused this war that’s waiting to happen.”

Even though this did but confirm his doubts, Lan Xichen was so shocked that all his strength left him and he nearly fell to his knees. Whatever else he had become, Jin Guangyao had once been his saviour during the war, then his friend, and eventually his sworn brother. He had kept the hope that things might be resolved in a peaceful manner, long after everything showed it to be impossible. And even if that friendship had shattered beyond what could be repaired, Lan Xichen had comforted himself with the thought that Jin Guangyao had only behaved in such a terrible manner because his father had forced him to choose filial loyalty over other duties.

It was a comfort Lan Xichen was now robbed of. Even if Jin Guangshan was sure to still carry his share of blame, it could not be denied anymore that Jin Guangyao was perfectly capable of evil on his own.

“When Xue Yang explained this, I decided I couldn’t stay out of it,” Wei Wuxian resumed. “I killed him without too much trouble, but it attracted the attention of those Jin disciples. I ended up forced to kill them too, but not until one of them explained what their instructions had been. That’s when I figured I had to get Jin Ling somewhere safe,” he added, looking mournful. “The best option would have been Yunmeng, but Jiang Cheng would skin me alive on sight."

Lan Xichen, still leaning with his shoulder against the wall, let out a joyless laugh.

"Most likely."

"So I decided I'd try to see if Lan Zhan might help. Even if we've not always seen eye to eye, he is the most honourable person I know, and I was sure he'd help with Jin Ling even if it was me asking."

Whatever strength had returned to Lan Xichen’s body nearly deserted him again at the thought of what his brother might do, when he would know Wei Wuxian to be alive again.

"I'm sure he would," he muttered.

"But when I arrived here, they told me Lan Zhan wasn't available,” Wei Wuxian continued as if he hadn’t heard. “I was lucky though, and someone recognised Mo Xuanyu’s face, but not Jin Ling's because I'd wrapped him in a shawl. They figured I couldn't be ignored, so they took me and little Jin Ling to see Lan-xiangsheng, who hid us here while he figured out what to do.”

“I won’t be able to hide you much longer,” Lan Qiren replied. “It will become noticed that I have been eating more than usual. It is only a shame I had not realised Xichen was helping his brother escape. The Jingshi would have made a great hiding place for you and that child until we decided how to handle that.”

“I did not want you to be blamed if Wangji’s escape was discovered,” Lan Xichen said.

"I’ve raised both of you,” Lan Qiren retorted, “And done a poor job of it if some elders are to be trusted. I’d have been blamed even if I protested my ignorance. Where is he?"

"Safe," Lan Xichen only said.

"Can we send those two to him?"

It was a good option to consider, but Lan Xichen still shook his head. Since the Jins had claimed Jin Ling was in the hands of the Nie, if he were discovered in a house that belonged to Nie Huaisang they could use it as proof that they’d said the truth. Likewise, if Nie Mingjue came to hear about it, he might take it as evidence that his brother was conspiring against him, and Lan Xichen could not do anything that might further endanger his dear friend.

Wei Wuxian agreed when Lan Xichen explained his reluctance.

“The best place for Jin Ling to be right now is Lotus Piers,” he claimed. “I can’t take him there, but as far as I know Jiang Cheng admires and respects both of you. If you bring him his nephew and explain what happened, he’ll listen.”

“He would at the very least declare himself neutral if his nephew were returned to him,” Lan Qiren agreed. “Or he might even join Nie Mingjue to demand Jin Guangyao be brought to justice. That would only leave the problem of what to do with you.”

“I’d quite like to stay out of this mess if I could,” Wei Wuxian retorted with a smirk. “But I can't do that until another matter is settled. I too must see Jin Guangyao punished for his crimes, even if they weren’t against me.”

As he said that, he lifted his left arm which had been wrapped around little Jin Ling, and cautiously lowered his sleeve to reveal a deep red cut which looked as if it were on the verge of an infection.

“I had two when I awoke in this body. The ritual mo Xuanyu uses demands that I accomplish his last requests, and those marks are a proof of that. The other went away when I killed Xue Yang, and since I’ve read Mo Xuanyu’s diaries, I have good reason to think this second one demands the death of Jin Guangyao. Poor kid had to blame someone for how miserable he was, and it’s his half-brother who assigned him to help Xue Yang.”

“And is there a time limit for Xuanyu’s revenge to be accomplished?”

“Probably, but I don’t know it. The wound has been getting a little painful lately, so I guess I should hurry.”

Presented with a problem to solve, Lan Xichen’s energy returned and he was finally able to stand straight again as he applied himself to finding a solution. The other two did the same, and silence fell onto the house.

“I have a suggestion,” Lan Xichen said after a moment. “Uncle, I think you should be the one to bring Jin Ling to Yunmeng. You are Jiang Cheng’s senior and his former teacher, so the respect he owes you will make it easier for him to accept what happened. For my part, I will take Wei Wuxian to the place where Lan Wangji is hidden. Wangji will be sure to keep an eye on him and on his health until other problems have been dealt with.”

Hearing this, Lan Qiren frowned. His nephew was hardly any happier at the idea of allowing a reunion between Lan Wangji and the man who had ruined his life, but leaving Wei Wuxian in the Cloud Recesses wasn’t an option, and neither was just releasing him without knowing what he might do while his life depended on Jin Guangyao’s death. But if Lan Wangji were told about the situation, he would do everything in his power to keep Wei Wuxian safe and out of trouble.

“When Wei Wuxian is safe,” Lan Xichen continued, “I will go to Qinghe and free Nie Huaisang.”

“That seems unwise,” Lan Qiren protested. “I like the boy well enough, but this is too dangerous. How would you even get inside the Unclean Realm?”

“It is not as impenetrable as it is reputed, and Nie Mingjue used to trust me enough to share some of its secrets with me when we were young.”

It was odd to think of that faraway youth, when they’d only been insouciant children. At the time, Nie Mingjue’s father had still been alive, and his eldest son hadn’t been forced yet to turn so serious. One afternoon, when Lan Xichen was visiting with his uncle, Nie Mingjue had shown him a secret passage so they could go play without anyone bothering them. It had been many years, but Lan Xichen was sure he would find that passage’s exit again. Then it would only be a matter of finding where Nie Huaisang had been imprisoned and releasing them.

“That’s still a great risk to take,” Lan Qiren insisted.

“It is,” Lan Xichen conceded. “And yet it must be attempted. Aside from Nie Huaisang, who has ever been known to convince Nie Mingjue to change his mind?”

Lan Qiren protested against that plan, as did Wei Wuxian, not that his opinion could have mattered to Lan Xichen. And yet, since neither could suggest anything better, that was the plan they adopted.

#xisang #lan xichen #lan qiren #wei wuxian #mo dao zu shi #mdzs #jau writes #forbidden romance au

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binniedeactivated · 3 years

Text

➥ PAIRING || taehyun x beomgyu

➥ GENRE || soulmate au! , enemies to lovers!, fantasy fanfiction

➥ W/C | 10k+

➥ SYNOPSIS || in which the both of them were admitted to Halls of Brotherhood: University of Magic. They were soulmates. yet they hated each other. But the marks on their skin said otherwise.

→ soulmate au where the thoughts of their soulmate inscribe themselves on one another’s skin

➥ WARNINGS || profanity, slight violence, angst I think?, fluff, mutual pining, slow burn kinda?

a/n; okay guys, this is my first time writing fantasy fiction so pls forgive me if it isn’t good. I’ve been trying to write this genre for years but couldn’t get it right. @moonlit-lixie your ask inspired me to write a soulmate au 🤲🏿

“You promised me I’d go to a normal school. You promised that I wouldn’t have to practice any of that stuff”. beomgyu whines to his mother from the passenger seat. It was the middle of the night and his heart was pounding in annoyance. He takes a hefty glance out the window through his bifocals and loses himself in the fast paced scenery. He wished he could be one of them. You know. a part of nature. Like a tree, a flower on the side of the road or something. He would do almost anything to escape this.

“Gyu sometimes things just have to change”. She swiftly replies. her beautiful face was calm and sullen while her hands rested on the steering wheel. That was one thing beomgyu always envied about his mother. She was so full of serenity in the midst of anything. she was a brave woman in the dust of any type of chaos.

“I don’t want to dabble in that stuff ”.

beomgyu swallows the leftover spit trapped in the space around his tongue. Magic has done nothing for him in life and in his mind, it never will. Magic was a nuisance. Magic was unforgiving. Magic killed his father.

She sluggishly presses her foot on the break and the both of them lean forward a bit at the sudden halt. beomgyu peers out of the windshield loathing in nervousness. They arrived at the train station and to his luck the boys were still boarding. His mother unbuckles her seatbelt shortly and beomgyu could only take a dreadful gander at her in shock. He wondered how she could be so comfortable mindlessly sending her only child away to practice the very thing that did his family no good.

“Why do I have to go? What difference will I add to them?”.

“gyu what did I tell you about talking like that?”.

He bit his lips feeling a little sorry for himself. He could’ve backtracked but he didn’t. That’s how he felt about himself and he couldn’t help it. He was too puny to do much of anything. Puny, anxious and hot tempered. And without those thick round glasses he could barely see what was right in front of him.

She gets out of the vehicle and once she did that beomgyu realized there would be no further discussion in the matter. He pushes open the passenger side door and tugs his luggage with him. He stuffs a hand in his pocket while the wind tousles his lengthy, black hair across his forehead. It was cold as hell outside and he wished he could just go back home to his bed. His mother approaches the conductor, showing the piece of mail she’d gotten days prior about beomgyu’s admission. Although the wind was tossing his hair a great deal beomgyu could still make out the sight of the conductor nodding in confirmation, gesturing him over. His mother awaited him at the entrance of the train to which he approached her with hesitance. Almost as if he were waiting for her to stop him in his tracks and admit this was all a prank. Or shake him vigorously, admitting this was just a dream But no, everything was just as surreal as the hopeful sparkle in her eyes when she looked at him, as if she knew something he didn’t.

She clutches either side of his head and plants a kiss on his forehead.

“I love you okay? You know I'm not doing any of this to spite you. Magic is in your bloodline. I’ll be in contact with you always alright?”.

He clutches her wrist. “I don’t want to do thi-”.

“Be strong for me beomgyu. Please”.

His heart ached at the agony in her eyes and he obliged. Magic was never his dream. It was hers. He nods his head though, telling her that he loves her and bids his farewell while stepping into the train cart. When he stepped on he was immediately pissed, assuming maybe he got the wrong cart. Out from the cold he was immersed into a noisy train, with loud and rowdy boys who were either talking at an ear piercing volume or pointlessly horsing around. none of them paid any mind to beomgyu though. Which was good, beomgyu hoped they kept that behavior up for as long as he were there. He swallows and pulls his varsity jacket sleeves over his fingertips, suddenly feeling anxious whilst walking down the aisle eyeing the empty seat in the back by the window. He hated settings like this. So lively and obnoxious it felt like the walls around him were closing in.

“Bro! Let me see!”.

A voice shrieks at a distance behind him before his footsteps grew closer, sounding as if he was sprinting. Within a blink of an eye beomgyu’s shoulder thrusted forward and he fell to the side, a result of the boy roughly running past him hitting his shoulder with no regard. Beomgyu felt his elbow suddenly press into the plastic bottle that the seated boy beside him was drinking from, leaving it now dented and water spilling all over the boy’s shirt. just by the way the boy was breathing beomgyu could tell he wasn’t too pleased. He pushes beomgyu off of him, so hard that his back almost hit the seats across from him.

“Yo! Watch where the hell you’re going!”.

Beomgyu peeled himself off the seat and fixed his ruffled clothes. His heart rate quickened just seeing the boy’s face drawn into an angry expression. Overwhelming fury coiled in beomgyu’s stomach.

“It was an accident!”. He hisses.

“Well don’t make accidents you just spilled my water all over me you fucking idiot!“.

Beomgyu clenches his jaw and balls his fists until his knuckles turned white.

“Don’t call me that”.

“Yeah? Or what? What are you going to do?”.

Once beomgyu charged forward he was immediately braced back by a long arm stretching across his chest. A clean shaven, outrageously hefty man who they would later know as Cyprus-- one of the headmaster’s faithful subordinates--had made it his duty to prevent the dispute from going any further.

“choi beomgyu”, he bellowed, his voice much more hoarse and gruff than beomgyu, or any of the boys expected. The cart grew quiet once the man spoke, they were tight lipped-- as if he used his hands and closed their mouths himself. beomgyu swallowed nervously and casts his eyes up at him.

“kang taehyun”, he bellows next. his dark eyes loomed over the both of them. taehyun breathed.

“yes?”. he mutters, something in him refusing to sound as scared as he looked.

“when you speak to me you use yes sir or no sir. do you understand?”. Beomgyu could only rest his eyes on the boy who was on the verge of beating the living shit out of him minutes prior, now mumbling with a speck of fear in his eyes.

“yes sir?”.

Cyprus then peers over at beomgyu. Beomgyu shifts his eyes from taehyun to cyprus a couple of times before realizing what he wanted.

“oh um--um yes sir?”.

“violence is not tolerated here. unless you want to face your discipline before you even get your room key, I suggest the both of you sit yourselves down somewhere”.

Like the fall of a microphone cyprus unhands be0mgyu and continues his journey along the carts making sure the rest of the boys were in order. Even after his disappearance the cart was dead silent.

Beomgyu tugs his luggage along with him to a random seat in the back, throwing himself down and laying his head back on the head rest as soon as he touches the chair. The doors were closing and the train was about to take off soon. The chatter on the cart began to sprout back up again. beomgyu sighed with his attention out the window. He wanted to be anywhere but here.

“don’t worry about tyun, he’s been like that ever since we were kids”. A rather mellow, wistful voice spoke beside him.

Beomgyu rolls his head over tiredly to the direction of the voice. He hadn’t even realized he was seated next to someone.

“He’s been what? A sensitive piece of shit?”,

The blonde haired boy smiled and laughed a little. Beomgyu had never seen a smile so bright in his life. His face was sort of angelic too, it had this shrill glow to it that beomgyu couldn’t stop looking at. He wondered if the boy was even real.

“No-- i mean he’s hot tempered like that all the time. So don’t sweat it. You’ll eventually learn to just stay out of his way”.

Beomgyu sucks his teeth. “or he can learn to stay out of mine”.

The boy laughs again, his face glowing so uncontrollably bright that his smile was a little contagious, spreading the disease of a small smile on beomgyu’s face also. The boy offers his hand,

“You’re funny. I’m heuning kai. Maybe we should be friends”.

Beomgyu was hesitant at first but nonetheless he shook it.

“I’m choi beomgyu”.

Heuning kai nods, thinking it was pretty odd to respond with “I know who you are”. Even though he did. He knew exactly who beomgyu was.

Beomgyu continued staring at his face-- it was obviously glowing at its edges. A sharp, pretty silver lining coasting along his jawline and over the crown of his blonde hair. Either that, or maybe beomgyu was just sleepy.

“So? Heuning kai …. what are you? Are you even a human?”. Beomgyu jokes. He really couldn’t fathom the other’s angelic appearance.

Kai’s cheeks began to tint pink in embarrassment. He thought he was blending in pretty well for the most part. “What makes you ask that?”.

“You’re glowing”.

Kai’s hands immediately touched his face which was incredibly warm. “Oh gosh I thought I had this under control”. he reaches into his bag and pulls out a small bottle of milk to drink.

“Have what under control?”.

“The glow. I’m half human and um--half fairy. I applied here so I can practice my magic”.

Beomgyu had an urge to touch him. He looked so pretty and perfect he wanted to see what he felt like at least once. He reached his hand out slowly to press his hand against kai’s. His skin was so velvety and pillow-like their hands practically melted into each other.

“Wow you’re so soft. I’ve never really met a fairy before”.

“Half. I’m a half fairy. A hury”.

“What’s the difference?”.

“Well, full blood fairies are incapable of feeling human emotions and they lack human-like qualities. They act off of magic instead of logic. But since I’m half, I’m able to use my magic wisely”.

Beomgyu nods in response, yawning with a sudden weary feeling washing over him all at once.

“That’s pretty cool. Can you do me a favor though and wake me when the train stops? I’m beat”.

Kai agrees, even though he wanted someone to talk to for the duration of the ride. He knew the other boys would think of him as a weirdo or freak of some sort. He was glad that beomgyu didn’t. No one ever took fairies too well. Beomgyu turned over though, curling his legs in the seat and allowed the moving moon to be his lullaby until he fell into his slumber.

By the time the train arrived at their destination the morning had already beat them to it. Kai had done his duty by waking beomgyu as he asked, even though it wasn’t easy. He remembers his mother--who was a full blooded fairy-- used to sprinkle sleeping pixies over his face when he was younger to get him to wake up. Oh how he wished he could’ve used them for gyu. Hopefully when kai gained some more experience he’d have those under his belt.

Beomgyu tugs his luggage and tiredly walks through the grassy quads of the campus which was utterly beautiful. The blades of grass reflected hues of vivid greens he only saw in his dreams. Even the shadow stone architecture of each building was built into a modern piece of art. Each building had different words carved into the stone at the top of the building. Words such as “Magic Engineering house”, “Magic Alchemy”, and even “Philosophy of Magic”. along these Multi colored stone walls and lining them occasionally were these big glass windows that were shiny and the cleanest he’s ever seen. But of course his moment of fascination came to an annoying end when he saw a big arrow sign, pointing first years to the direction of the auditorium.

“Oh gosh”, beomgyu whined. “I just wanted to sleep”.

“It’s morning time now. Plus you didn’t even get your room key, where are you going to sleep?”. Kai spoke from beside him. Beomgyu shrugs.

“I’ll sleep on this grass if I have to”.

Beomgyu meant it too. He really would’ve if he wasn’t so afraid of looking like an idiot. Instead he followed kai into the crowded auditorium, it was filled with all of the first year boys babbling excitedly about what kind of magic they were going to be best at. Pft. as if they knew. Beomgyu refused to sit by himself so he followed kai to the end of the seventh row.

Once beomgyu sat down he only looked up in demise, of course kang taehyun was also sitting at the end of the array of seats across from his. Beomgyu pretended he was taking short glances around the auditorium just so he could let his eyes fall on taehyun every once in a while. He happened to be conversing with his own friends looking as smug as can be. Beomgyu watches him talk with his hands. So sophisticated-like. Like he knew what he was talking about all the time. He watched as his black hair sat so neatly over his eyes, how cool he kind of looked with his red hoodie falling off his shoulder a little. Or how cute he looked with his dimples pushing into his cheeks whenever one of his friends said something funny.

No, no way. No way could he be this cute.

“Good morning first years! Headmaster Hutton welcomes you to Halls of Brotherhood: University of Magic!”.

The applause after those words were extravagant. The boys clapped like they were at a concert or something. It was so loud it actually made beomgyu blink back from his small trance. Taehyun shifted in his seat uncomfortably amongst the applause. While he was clapping he felt a stinging sensation along his forearm. He was going to ignore it thinking maybe his hoodie sleeve had scratched him a little. But it felt as though something was writing into his skin. He hesitantly pushes his hoodie sleeve up his arm with black ink catching his eye. His forearm was stained with sloppy yet surprisingly legible handwriting.

No way. No way could he be this cute.

Taehyun shakes his head and pulls his sleeve back down over the dark mark with his stomach churning. He’d just gotten on magical grounds and his soulmate had already begun thinking about him. In a way taehyun felt selfish. He wasn’t thinking of his soulmate at all nor did plan to at any point. He just wanted to study magic and that was all.

He couldn’t help his curiosities though. He snakes his eyes through the overstuffed auditorium full of boys, trying to decipher one by one who could it possibly be, who was looking at him at the moment or even sneaking glances his way. But from what he could tell everyone was paying attention to whatever the headmaster was saying. He still searches around even circling his eyes to beomgyu a couple of times. Of course beomgyu was paying him no mind, sneaking whispers over to heuning kai ever so often. After the episode they both had on the train it was safe to say that taehyun wasn’t fond of beomgyu at all. hell, he still wanted to beat the shit out of him for that. But in this moment he felt quite different. He watched as the boy's lengthy sleek black locks fell all over his head each time he moved and even the strands in the back reached down the nape of his neck. With the numerous piercings in his ear and the tan colored varsity jacket he was wearing taehyun noticed that beomgyu’s face starkly contrasted his look. A cute, rather anxious boy who dressed confident, maybe taehyun found that to be a little attractive.

Maybe he’s a little attractive.

He quickly casts his eyes back on the headmaster though, catching up on the instruction of where to get room keys and uniforms. Beomgyu thought uniforms were kind of stupid, then again he didn’t mind waking up in the morning not having to think of an outfit. He wasn’t much of a morning person anyway, so that situation seemed pretty glorious. What wasn’t so glorious though was the tingling sensation crawling across his skin. He smacked himself, thinking it was a bug or something but the scrawling only insisted.

“You alright?”. Kai whispers.

Beomgyu breathes and lifts his shirt sleeve up glaring at what looked to be a tattoo in someone's handwriting. It was slanted and italic, quite beautiful actually.

Maybe he’s a little attractive.

“wow already?”. Kai whispers again. “Your soulmate is already thinking of you”.

“I don’t know why. I’m just sitting here. I’m not even worried about a soulmate. I don’t want one.”.

“nonsense. You should think about them more. Having a soulmate is quite nice you know”.

Beomgyu shrugs it off, ignoring his words and anticipating the end of orientation. He was grateful to finally get his room key, class schedule and uniform-- khaki pants, a yellow argyle sweater vest, a red tie and a white long sleeve button up to wear underneath. They were going to be sent an extra supply of them later, but for now they were required to wear them to each class. To his great fortune he was rooming with heuning kai. Well, to his fortune and misfortune. He wasn’t sure how kai would be as a roommate yet.

On the other hand the room they were given was nice though, the typical two bed duo with a good amount of space in the middle as well as their very own desks and top cabinets on both walls. Kai throws his things down just to look around. And beomgyu did the same, trying to figure out what kinds of things he could put on his desk to encourage him to study. god, he hated studying. Just the thought alone made him want to pack his things and go home. But studying was the only way he'd get stronger in magic, so he had to learn somehow. He hoped kai had good studying habits. Perhaps he could copy off his paper every once in a while.

“Wow. This room is pretty nice. I was expecting something smaller”. Kai spoke, walking around a bit.

“Yeah me too. I wonder where we shower and stuff though”.

“Headmaster says the showers are down the hall for each floor”.

“Shit. so you’re telling me I can’t have my privacy either”.

Kai laughs. “Well, the showers have curtains you know. They’re like little stalls. It isn’t like a group shower or anything. Like the ones in prison”.

“Great. How awkward it’ll be to walk out the shower in front of a bunch of boys with just a bathrobe on”.

“You’ll be fine hyung. Don’t sweat it”.

Beomgyu sighs and plops himself down on the vacant bed, lying in a fetal sleeping position. “Can you wake me when another big event happens that requires my attendance?”.

“Going to sleep already? You don’t want to go to breakfast?”.

“Breakfast? We have breakfast?”. Beomgyu asks, still lying in his position contemplating on getting up.

“yeah it’s still early. They can’t have us settle in without feeding us. You coming or what?”.

Beomgyu sighs. “You know what I guess I’ll come. I guess I am a little hungry anyway and I should take advantage of this food while I can”. He gets up and straightens his jacket a bit before following kai to the refectory. It wasn’t a long walk persé but it did take quite some time to get there. He was glad he tagged along with kai because it would’ve been kind of sad for him to have to walk this path alone.

“So? Heuning kai? Why aren’t you as excited and obnoxiously outgoing as the other boys?”. Beomgyu couldn’t help but ask on their way. Kai gives him a light shrug.

“It’s just college I mean, what’s there to be excited about? It isn’t like anyone is going to take me seriously anyway. I might as well stay out the way”.

“Take you seriously? Why wouldn’t they take you seriously?”.

“Wow you seriously don’t know much about the world of magic huh?”.

“Growing up I forced my mother to raise me like a regular kid. It was only until now where she decided that she wanted me to follow the mages in my bloodline. I’m practically a human. Anyway though, why wouldn’t they take you seriously?”.

Kai exhales with shame creeping up his throat. “Well in the world of magic, you have the big leaguers kind of like the NBA. the mages and the wizards and all. And then you have those in the middle, who are really good alchemists and magical engineers. And then all the way at the bottom there are the fairies. That is where I come in”.

“Why are you guys at the bottom?”.

“Well the others don’t think we’re as capable of having strong magic. They think we all just dance in glitter and glow in happiness. Like we’re completely oblivious to the world around us which isn’t true. And since fairies are kind of rare, there hasn’t really been a single fairy that proved otherwise. Meanwhile we hear about these great mages and wizards all the time, so it’s kind of like we have nothing to go off of for ourselves”.

beomgyu takes some time to think for a moment. In a way it was kind of true, he hasn’t really heard of fairies and their capabilities throughout the span of his life, hence why kai is the first fairy he’s ever met. Well, half fairy. The dilemma was still kind of surprising to hear about nonetheless. They were now opening the door to the entrance where beomgyu sits his hand on kai’s shoulder.

“Well, I believe in you heuning. I think you can prove these bastards wrong”.

Kai chuckles as his gesture, more appreciative than gullible. “Thank you but you don’t have to say things like that to cheer me up. I know mages and wizards are very strong in magic so maybe I won’t ever be able to top them. But as long as I’m perfecting my craft I guess that’s okay”. When he said that it kind of hurt him a little even though he internalized it prior to even attending the school. I guess it just hurts more when saying it aloud.

Once they opened the double doors it wasn’t a surprise to see a little over one hundred first year boys in there already. The dining hall looked like something out of a Victorian era movie. There was a big beautiful bright chandelier hanging from the center of the ceiling and elegant designs engraved in the stone walls along the drapes. Even the floor was pure marble, sparkling and shining as if they were inviting every foot possible to walk on them. There were four extremely long dining tables in the center of the hall and buffet styled food around them at a distance along the walls. The boys were noisily eating at the tables and conversing with their friends. It made beomgyu kind of wonder how these guys made friends so fast in the first place.

Okay, so maybe beomgyu hadn’t been thinking about the pros and cons to this school before but after seeing the food he realized that it was definitely a pro. He’s had his fair share of good meals but he hadn’t ever seen food as perfect and well cooked as the food there.

“Wow,”. beomgyu tones with his eyes grazing over the strawberry banana pancakes, topped with whipped cream and melted butter. Kai withdrew two metallic trays from the stack, one for him and one for beomgyu.

“I know right. I was not expecting this”.

And taking a few glances from a couple of tables behind them was taehyun who was chewing into his food and half listening to the conversation with his friends. There had to be some way he could get revenge on beomgyu. Especially with how unapologetic he looked when he did what he did to him. And then arguing with him after that made it much worse. Taehyun didn’t like disrespect of any kind, and he especially wasn’t going to take it from some puny kid.

“I think, when we get really good at magic we should form a larger friend group you know? Like one of us could be good at alchemy, one at spells, one at history, you know”. Soobin begans, forking a big glob of rice into his mouth and finger combing his hair.

Yeonjun chews with his cheeks full, “who ever told you that you’d be good at magic?”. Earning a slap on his shoulder from soobin.

“To have you know both of my parents were great mages that graduated from this school”.

Taehyun sips orange juice from his straw. “Yeah and you’re they’re idiot son”. To which yeonjun tries his best to laugh without the contents of his mouth making a disgusting mess all over the white table cloth. Soobin rolls his eyes though and follows taehyun’s line of sight.

“Hey isn’t that the kid who spilled water on you on the train last night?”.

“Yeah. that little bastard”.

“Tyun give it a rest, man. Mistakes happen”. Yeonjun consoles while wiping the corners of his mouth.

Taehyun ignores him and gathers the small plates of food he hadn’t planned on eating, settling them onto his tray.

“I’m going to go throw this stuff away I’ll be right back”, he uttered, removing himself from the table before even getting a chance to hear what they had to say. He breaks his way through the crowds of kids clutching his tray tightly in his hand until he was finally in the spot he was aiming for. He squeezed into the space in line,Just behind beomgyu where the trash can was located. He fake trips over some boy’s shoe, leaving him and his tray flying directly into beomgyu’s back. The metallic tray flipped and smeared the food all over the back of beomgyu’s jacket and fell to the floor obnoxiously loud. So loud in fact that it caught the attention of everyone in the refectory.

Beomgyu stood there stunned, hoping what he thought happened to him hadn’t just happened. He could feel the heat of the food slide down his jacket and onto the floor below him and he turned around to see taehyun, stepping back and holding his hands up in surrender innocently. “It was an accident”. He admitted. But beomgyu knew full well it wasn’t. He could hear the animosity laced in his tone. Anger pooled in his chest and he grits his teeth. He automatically reaches his hand out to push taehyun back a couple of inches, almost knocking him into the heads of the boys behind him.

“What the fuck you moron!”.

Taehyun stumbles back to his feet and clenches his jaw even angrier. He pushes him back twice as hard. Beomgyu runs back and tackles him to the ground, trying his best to wrap his hands tightly around the younger’s neck.

“Get the hell off me!”. Taehyun grumbled, snaking his hand from his side and finally managing to punch beomgyu in his jaw with it.

After escaping his trance of shock kai rushes over to beomgyu’s aid and tugs him off of taehyun, trying his best to hold him back from going for a cheap shot. Soobin and yeonjun finally decided to amble to the scene also; they too were in too much shock to do anything the first time. Soobin helps taehyun off the ground and yeonjun acts as the safeguard to prevent taehyun from going back for another punch. Not that he could anyway, they could hear the sound of heels clashing against the marble floors gradually breaking their way through the group of boys until taehyun and beomgyu found out who they belonged to.

A gorgeous woman who wasn’t any much shorter than them but was visibly older. A loose black bow tie clung around the collar of her white button up which she tucked into her long, plaid green and purple skirt that kissed the floor. Her dark spiral curled hair sat on her shoulders, unwilting and uptight, just like her displeased face when she approached them. She had this beautiful staff in her hand, it was purple and it had a pretty crystal ball at the top of it, like she withheld all of her magic within it’s confinement. She held her head high with pride before she spoke,

“Mr. kang? Mr. choi? come with me please”. She beckoned before strolling out of the exit door. Kai pats beomgyu’s shoulder before letting him leave with taehyun following shortly after. The two boys were nervous as they followed her, for she hadn’t turned around once but it was like she could sense where they were behind her.

“Look around yourselves dear. I want you to ask yourselves whether you see a campus or a boxing ring”. her high aristocratic voice bellowed as she walked, placing her staff in the space in front of her as if to help her get there. however beomgyu noticed she could walk just fine, she had perfect posture even. well she had the posture of a stuck up snob.

“I expect an answer,”. she adds after their silence.

“I see a campus mrs”. beomgyu rushes to speak in hopes of lessening the punishment they were already set on getting. he wishes he wasn’t so quick to talk though, his jaw was still aching in pain. he clutches it softly.

“It’s madam genevieve to you darling. kang taehyun? I’m assuming you see a campus as well?”.

“yes madam genevieve”.

she kept her thin red lips pursed into a fine line.

“hm. I want you both to know that violence is never tolerated here. now since this is your first quarrel I shall start you off with a warning. anything after this will be detention and grade point deductions. do I make myself clear?”.

beomgyu swallowed. cyprus obviously didn’t tell her about their train incident but he wasn’t going to be the one to tell her. And from the look on taehyun’s face taehyun wasn’t going to be the one to tell her either.

“yes madam Genevieve”. The both of them stated in unison.

“this university isn’t called halls of brotherhood without reason. we’re all on the same team and we should treat each other as such. now run along. mr. choi I suppose you need a slip to visit the medi?”.

beomgyu was still stunned on how she could see him painfully rubbing his mouth when she hadn’t turned around. hearing her say that made beomgyu want to punch taehyun back twice as hard but he rather not risk his grades when the first day of classes hadn’t even started yet. he deserved to be in just as much pain as him.

“yes madam”.

she curved her hands at an angle and blew into them softly, a signed slip of parchment paper gradually appeared in beomgyu’s hand. he jumps a bit at the sudden use of magic but he figured these are the kinds of things he’d have to get used to in this school. he bowed to her and graciously thanked her before going on his way to find the medical building.

taehyun hated himself for feeling a little guilty after beomgyu departed. he deserved it didn’t he? he was trying to convince himself that he gave him a taste of his own medicine. But the tinge of guilt still hadn’t gone away.

beomgyu was laying down when he felt the scrawling on his skin again. the medi-wizard was rubbing the scented magic oil along his jaw, it smelled of hints of chocolate and cocoa butter. beomgyu wondered what would happen if he licked it. but he was still a newbie at magic and didn’t want to risk those types of experiments with himself. as the oil settled on his skin he felt the aching pain go away. he could finally move his jaw properly.

“there you go. that should do it. you’re all set to leave lad”.

beomgyu sits up promptly and thank him, not expecting this visit to go by as fast as it did. after what happened though he lost his appetite. so instead of going to the refectory he went to back to his room and plopped himself back on the bed like he was before. the stinging sensation in his forearm resurfaced and he lifts his sleeve up to read.

I wonder if he’s okay.

beomgyu sucks his teeth wondering why his soulmate had sat and watched the incident occur instead of helping him. Or preventing it from happening even. This is why he didn’t care much for a soulmate. He thought the only thing they’re good at is thinking. he withdrew his soiled jacket and he turns over in fetal position, ignoring the fact that he still hadn’t put his sheets on the bed yet and fell asleep anyways.

he hadn’t known how much he was tired though. by the time his eyes fluttered open the sky had darkened, and kai’s half of the room was already set up with posters on his wall, yellow and blue sheets on his bed, and his clothes folded neatly and put away. the room was dark but glowed a soft dark blue due to the string lights that kai had along the top borders of the walls. music was playing from somewhere though and beomgyu blinked again this time trying to find where it was coming from. he found kai sitting at his desk on his laptop, the soft + chill indie playlist was coming from his computer.

beomgyu breathed. “kai? what time is it?”. he says groggily.

“hm? oh you’re up. it’s around 8pm or so. you missed dinner so I brought some back to the room for you. It’s on your desk”.

beomgyu was grateful, as soon as kai mentioned dinner his stomach practically wanted to bite him. “god you’re a lifesaver thank you”.

he got up and approached his desk clutching the container, “what is it?”.

“Steak, mashed potatoes with gravy and snow peas”.

immediately upon opening beomgyu grabs a fork and shoves a piece of steak in his mouth and sighs in relief. he was starving. he hadn’t eaten all day.

“Is your jaw alright? What happened in the refectory today?”.

beomgyu sighs before sitting at his desk across from kai.

“yeah I’m fine. the medi rubbed some chocolate magic oil on me. But that little son of a bitch taehyun threw his food all over the back of my jacket. On purpose”.

Kai furrows his eyebrow, “the medi rubbed chocolate magic oil on you?”.

“yeah”.

“And then what?”.

beomgyu thought for a moment trying to figure out what the younger was getting at. once it came to mind he grabbed one of his salt packets and playfully launched it at kai’s head. kai laughed in response and dodged it. he dodged it way too late though.

“It wasn’t like that”, beomgyu starts, “he only rubbed it on my jaw. plus that medi wizard is old as hell”.

“for all I know you could be one of those people who likes when old men rub oil on you”.

beomgyu chuckles and clutches his plastic knife in launching position. “you say another fucking word heuning and I will dart this at your eye”.

kai chuckles again. “Anyway. taehyun was probably just trying to get revenge”.

“revenge for what? the train thing was an accident. that kid is insane”. beomgyu sits his bowl down eyeing kai’s laptop. “what are you doing online anyway? classes aren’t until tomorrow morning”.

“our class schedules were posted. you should check yours to see if we have classes together”.

“I will after I take a shower or something. I think that breakfast food settled into my clothes a little”. beomgyu pulls up his collar and sniffs, crinkling his nose at the weird scent.

“I think now is a good time. earlier when I went it was a bit crowded”.

beomgyu huffed and looked through his luggage to find his pajamas and toiletries. he threw a towel over his shoulder and promised kai his return. It was weird being away from home. I mean it was college, of course it’s what beomgyu expected but he wasn’t expecting all of it to happen so soon. it was what his mother wanted for him.

beomgyu was coming near the bathrooms and he was happy to hear how empty it was. well, he thought it was empty. he strolled inside, hearing quite a few voices and laughter. he immediately stopped in his tracks though when he spotted taehyun in the wide bathroom mirror in front of the sinks, shaving his face with a towel wrapped around his waist. beomgyu immediately stood back by the wall near the entrance where taehyun couldn’t see him.

it wasn’t like he was afraid. but it was late and he didn’t feel like dealing with taehyun’s shit right now. it had been a long day, only the first day in fact. He couldn’t afford any deductions this soon.

beomgyu stepped up inch by inch, peeking over the other side of the wall. he saw taehyun’s wet black strands of hair falling over his forehead. he was focused, in the mirror trying to shave as much as he could. beomgyu’s eyes fall onto the younger’s arms and body. his abs were chiseled and he built quite a bit of muscle in his biceps from what beomgyu could tell, they were glistening every single time taehyun shook the can of shaving cream. beomgyu curses at himself.

fuck. why is he so good looking?

Beomgyu places his head back on the other side of the wall where taehyun couldn’t see him. He decided to get a towel and throw it over his head just to get himself safely to a stall. although he looked like an idiot, his plan worked and he was sure to lock the stall behind himself and immediately stripped himself of his clothes.

taehyun ran the razor underneath the warm water. he felt that sensation again. The one he felt earlier with the feeling of something inscribing itself on his skin. he glanced at his forearm to read,

fuck. why is he so good looking?

taehyun laughs a little to himself. he looked around at the few guys that were in the bathroom. most of which were either talking to their friends or in the shower stalls but neither was paying him any mind. he didn’t want a soulmate but he also thought the little aggression in his soulmate’s tone was kind of cute. maybe it wasn’t so bad not knowing who his soulmate was.

he goes back to shaving and looking at himself in the mirror, thinking about the message on his forearm over again.

*********

“You look fine hyung, really”. Kai tried to encourage, but beomgyu wasn’t having it. He could feel his body growing hot inside the uniform and to make matters worse, he looked too preppy for his liking. He stood in the mirror, tugging on the collar of his button down with disgust.

“Why does it have to look like this?”.

Kai clutches the notebooks in his hand, “it’s school orders to wear our uniforms to each class or it’s a deduction. And speaking of, being late for class is a deduction also. So you might want to put your shoes on”.

“Shit”. Beomgyu grumbles, clutching a shoe off the ground and trying his best to quickly shove it over the heel of his foot. “I’ve already got several warnings. Hey what class do you have first?”.

“I’m in the philosophy building. What about you?”.

“Damn it. I have alchemy”. Beomgyu shoots up after he was finished, taking another glance at himself in the mirror before swinging his backpack over his shoulder. “I look like an idiot. But whatever”.

Kai laughs and opens the door, “let’s go”.

Parting ways with kai was kind of hard, beomgyu will admit. He wasn’t fond of making friends on his own. If it was up to him he’d rather talk to kai for all of his years enrolled. He didn’t mind kai being his only friend. Anyways though, it took him a good amount of time to even find the alchemy wing, much less arriving on time. And professor harlow made that known as soon as beomgyu walked in. wasn’t scribbling on the chalkboard, no-- rather the chalk was scribbling for her while she leaned on her desk and took sips of her black coffee.

“you’re late mr. choi. had trouble finding the room?”.

Shit. beomgyu thought if he said nothing and just kept walking it would keep her from speaking to him. But no, of course she discussed it out in the open and everyone’s eyes were on him now.

“yeah sorry about that. gonna try and be earlier tomorrow”.

Beomgyu quickly informed as he kept walking to the back of the room where the empty seats were. He wanted the interaction to be over with as soon as possible.

“In Alchemy we have labs and lab question discussions. Everyone is assigned to a three person group. Mr. choi you’ll be in group #4”.

Beomgyu took a breath and searched around the table numbers. A solemn feeling of relief washed over him once he found that it was on the other side of the room, he probably was looking like an idiot in front of everyone. He pulled out his chair and threw his backpack down, nodding at his tablemates. It was only a matter of time before professor harlow began speaking again, laying out the rules and expectations of the class. The pink haired boy held his hand out to beomgyu with a small smile,

“What up. I’m yeonjun”. He whispers.

The blue haired boy beside him held his hand out also, chewing on a snack he snuck in.

“I’m soobin”.

Beomgyu nods and shakes both of their hands firmly. He didn’t understand why they were so fond of handshakes at a young age. I mean, he didn’t want them to jump into an extravagant hug or anything but gosh, It felt like he was greeting a professor or something.

“I’m beomgyu”.

Yeonjun nods. “how are you doing? I’m sorry about taehyun the other day”.

Beomgyu rolls his eyes at the reminder. “It’s alright I’m fine, thanks for asking’.

“yeah he’s a little hot tempered. Don’t worry about him though. We’re going to do our best to keep him cordial with you in this class”. Soobin adds.

Beomgyu could almost snap his pencil in half with his hand. “he’s in this class?”.

Yeonjun turns a little and points his head in Taehyun's direction. beomgyu’s eyes followed and he saw tahyun seated with his own tablemates, highlighting due dates on the syllabus. By that gesture alone beomgyu already knew what type of student taehyun was. And he always hated those types of students. The know-it-alls.

Beomgyu annoyingly shook his head, making a pft noise before turning his attention back to the chalkboard. “this is going to be such a shitty year”. he told himself, frankly not caring if the others heard him or not. whether or not they heard him throughout class, all he could hear was them. each and every day they were consistently arguing back and forth over stupid things. most of which beomgyu tried to ignore for the most part. but it was hard to get a lab done when his partners just wanted to get on each other’s last nerve. maybe this is why they repeatedly failed alchemy.

“I totally won that bet. hand over the cash soobin”.

“no because you didn’t win”.

“yes I did. I won it fair and square and you know it”.

“you always want to win everything hyung. how about you learn to lose sometimes?”.

beomgyu shook his head and adjusts his safety goggles and lab coat, placing the beaker full of liquid on the weighing scale and recording the data on the sheet of paper. he hadn’t known making potions would be exactly like chemistry. he was never particularly good at chemistry but since yeonjun and soobin were no help he had no choice but to put his own skills to the test.

“that’s why I can’t play these types of games with you soobin. you’re a sore fucking loser”.

“I’m not you’re just a big brat who thinks he needs to win every possible thing in life”.

looking right past them two though beomgyu glances over at taehyun who was at the other table across from him, of course doing the lab as he was told. he was talking to his group mates and for some reason a tinge of jealousy stained beomgyu’s heart.

beomgyu hadn’t realized that his thought provoked an inscription in taehyun’s forearm. he faltered a little while pouring the bits of sodium in the hydro flask before turning away to check the message.

I hate the fact that I’m so jealous of everyone who has access to you

access to your humor , your friendship, your heart.

possessiveness comes so easy for me I feel like you’re mine.

taehyun’s cheeks tinted and his heart flutters in a way he never felt before. He decides to continue with the lab experiment so his groupmates wouldn’t question him about anything. He couldn’t help but to think of it over and over. before thinking of something else.

I am yours. always and forever, sweetheart.

“they called you sweetheart? that’s so cute!”. Kai jeers at the dinner table, making the boys around him look at him a little oddly. Beomgyu rolls his eyes and spreads the butter on his piece of bread. “Stop it kai. It isn’t that serious. And I also think you’re glowing a little”. Beomgyu said the last part rather quietly. Kai settles himself and smooths his hands over his hot reddening cheeks. He couldn’t wait to learn more magic so he could control it a lot better.

“I’m sorry I just got a little excited. You should be excited though. who knows what can happen. Maybe you’ll fall in love”.

“pft I will not”.

“ I think you will. especially since you’ve never been in love before”.

beomgyu takes a pause before chewing into the buttered bread. “wait--how do you know that?”.

“oh um well it’s another hury trait of mine. we know a lot about the lives of different humans”.

“so you’re telling me you knew who I was this whole time?”.

“yeah but i know everyone. everyone just doesn’t know me”.

beomgyu chews on a sweet potato fry. he glanced over kai’s features, thinking the boy was way too innocent for his own good.

“have you ever been in love before kai?”.

“yeah but I think it was one sided. I hope to find true love someday”.

beomgyu smiled a little to himself, sliding his arm around kai’s shoulders. “you will. don’t worry. for now we can have fun and fool around until then”.

kai’s heart grew warm and beomgyu could tell he was a happy about the gesture, his face started glowing again.

“thank you hyung”.

“so like are you guys dating?”. beomgyu heard someone ask from the other side of him. he turns to look and by the boy’s face he could see that the ginger haired boy wasn’t genuinely curious at all. he looked as though he was on the verge of laughter, like someone sent him to their table as a joke.

“why the hell do you care? who even are you?”. beomgyu rebuttals.

“just wanted to tell you that you guys look cute together”. The boy adds, cupping his hand over his lips to keep from laughing. kai didn’t like feeling like this. he hated the feeling of becoming angry. it was a feeling his fae family had felt way too often, they were evil creatures and kai didn’t want to be that way.

“go away”. kai mumbled underneath his breath in a tone that beomgyu had never heard out of him before. it was dark and didn’t sound good at all. the boy stands up, making a scene.

“or what? no one is scared of you, softie. you look soft you can’t be a wizard or a mage. what the hell are you? a fairy?”.

at the sound of that word almost everyone around them dropped their jaws and stared, just waiting to see what kai’s reaction was going to be. and by this time kai’s face grew hot but it didn’t glow. this time it was almost crimson red. he reaches his hand over and pulls the boy by his collar. the boy’s heart dropped at the sight of kai’s pupils growing larger, and not in a cute way. no, kai’s eyes had become all black.

“offuco”. he growls, with pixie dust flowing from his mouth and into the boy’s. and sure enough the command did exactly as kai expected, the dust sneaking into the boys throat made him choke to the floor. his neck and face had begun to turn red, so much that his friends had to practically drag him to the medi wing.

beomgyu’s heart was pounding and he was terrified. So was everyone around him who had now turned around back to their tables, not wanting to partake in anything else. beomgyu swallows with his eyes peering over at kai. he looked much more normal and his pupils even decreased in size. the red in his face had seized and his milky skin was arriving again.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do that. I have to go— take my meds or something”. he quickly clutches his backpack and makes his way out before beomgyu could even say his next word. dinner wouldn’t be anything without kai though and he truly felt bad for him. he didn’t want to just sit and eat alone not knowing what was possibly running through the boy’s mind. so beomgyu grabs his backpack too and takes an early exclusion from dinner.

he trudges down the hallway cursing at himself for taking this way. to his luck taehyun, soobin and yeonjun were all standing by the vending machines at the end of the hall. he needed to get to kai though and this was the quicker option. he sucked up his pride and tried not to make eye contact but of course yeonjun had something to say anyways.

“beomgyu? what’s up”.

shit.

“yeah what’s up gyu. I’m going to try to work on the lab questions tonight. I feel sorry that we didn’t do the experiment”. Soobin adds.

beomgyu shrugs. “yeah it’s alright. I’ll try to work on them too”.

Yeonjun nods, “later on we’re having some drinks in my room if you want to stop by”.

taehyun glares at the pink haired boy.

“what? he can come along if he wants”.

“no he can’t. him and his weird ass boyfriend can stay where they are”.

“oh shut the fuck up taehyun”. beomgyu harshly replied.

“you shut the fuck up. I can say what I want to say. you’re not coming”.

“tyun relax a little”. soobin warned, eyeing Cyprus who was already down the hallway.

“don’t mind him he’s just being an ass. you can come if you want”. yeonjun continues.

“no thank you. I don’t want to go to a place where I’m not invited by everyone”.

“so keep walking then”. taehyun adds with his arms folded.

beomgyu shoves him back into the vending machine.“you fucking have issues”. taehyun gets off of it getting ready to shove him back but yeonjun acts as a safeguard once again, preventing anything else.

“guys. relax alright? you both aren’t going to be practicing shit but detention if you’re just going to fight all the time”.

“fuck that. fuck him. I have to go”. beomgyu snatches yeonjun’s hand off his chest before continuing the walk back to his room.

he knocks, barely hearing anything before he walks in. he was happy to see Kai sitting on the edge of his bed with a pill bottle in his hand and a bottle of water. he looked normal for the most part, just a little spaced out. which is completely normal after the episode that just occurred.

“you alright kai?”. beomgyu asks, shutting the door behind him.

“I’m okay hyung. I'm sorry about earlier”.

“you don’t have to apologize for your traits. stop doing that. I’m your friend and I just want to learn more about you”. beomgyu takes a seat on his own bed, rubbing his hands on his slacks. “so what was that?”.

“remember when I told you everyone thinks that fairies dance in glitter and glow in happiness?”.

beomgyu nods. “yeah?”.

“fairies are evil hyung. and the worst thing you could ever do is use the word fairy as an insult to any of us. and some fairies don’t like being called that”.

beomgyu’s eyes widened. It scared him a little. “so what are you called?”.

“we’re called the good people”.

“geesh kai. I wish that boy knew that. you practically choked him to death without even touching him. I think next time I have alchemy I’ll try my best to make a potion for that. that was kind of cool”. beomgyu laughs a little in attempt to lighten the mood. kai smiles a little along with him.

“don’t use your magic to hurt people. I didn’t want to do that but I was angry and evil magic is the only thing I was really taught when I was younger”.

“It’s alright. that’s what we’re here for. to get our magic under control.”

“you’re right. thanks hyung. well thanks for checking on me”.

“no problem. I was trying to get here faster but I almost faught taehyun’s dumb ass again”.

“Again?”.

“he’s such a bitch kai. you out of all people should know that. yeonjun invited me for drinks in their dorms or whatever— and taehyun got all defensive saying that I couldn’t come”.

“drinks? you should’ve gone and had fun with the third years”.

“without you? If I would’ve gone tonight you would’ve been coming with me”.

this was true. If beomgyu had gone he would’ve bought kai along. but taehyun knew if beomgyu tagged along he didn’t know what would come out his mouth while he was drunk. perhaps he would’ve admitted everything he thought about him. and he couldn’t afford for beomgyu to know any of that. he hated him yet he was attracted to him all at once. this is what mainly had his heart racing as soon as beomgyu walked through the door.

“gyu! wassup man”. yeonjun for some reason yelled a little louder than he intended. there weren’t many people in the third year suite drinking along with them but it was quite enough. more than beomgyu or kai been around at least. the room was dimly lit and there was music playing amongst the chatter between the boys in the room.

“what’s up. I bought heuning with me”.

“that’s no problem I’m glad you came. thought you were going to ditch us after you were about to beat taehyun’s ass”.

Beomgyu swatted his hand as if to discard the statement. “never mind that shit. we’re just here to experience the fun with third years”.

a drunk soobin immediately pushes a bottle of whiskey to kai’s chest. “let the fun begin”.

and truly beomgyu wasn’t expecting kai to drink as much as he did. beomgyu drank a little, but not out of control. he was too busy laughing at the piss poor job the third years were doing at karaoke. kai was too, he was laughing so hard on the ground next to him that his face flushed pink.

taehyun had been on the other side of the room talking amongst his other group of friends, eyeing beomgyu every chance he got. he didn’t want him here but he was too drunk and weak to do anything about it. especially when beomgyu locks eyes with him back, the both of them stared each other down for what seemed to be five minutes before they nervously looked elsewhere.

If only you knew how pretty you are to me.

taehyun’s drunk thoughts were scrawled across beomgyu’s arm. to which beomgyu slides his sleeves down and tries to hide the blush in his cheeks.

If the sun could laugh or smile I’m sure it would look a lot like yours. stunning, and it takes my breath away.

I know I can’t have you

and I hate the fact that a small piece of me wishes that I could

I’ve grown weak for you and It feels like I’ve known you before. It feels like I’ve loved you before.

and the more taehyun watched him laugh and smile he realized it was true. he did. he loved beomgyu so much. and when beomgyu locked himself in a bathroom stall just to read the numerous tattoos all over his body he had realized he loved them too. whoever his soulmate was, he was in love. and he couldn’t help it.

#choi beomgyu #beomgyu fluff #beomgyu angst #kang taehyun #taehyun angst #taehyun fluff #taegyu #soulmate au #taegyu au #tomorrow by together #choi beomgyu fluff #choi beomgyu angst

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whitherliliesbloom · 3 years

Photo

You follow the scent trail of sweet flowers...until you bump into a mysterious bijou girl with starspun hair and lustrous lavender eyes. Mysterious girl far from home: “O-oh- I’m sorry... The way you’re looking at me as if you want to d-duel... W-well, i-if you in-insist..”

@windupnamazu‘s Pokemon!AU Illya headcanons under the cut! It’s very long, so hang tight! Note the headcanons may be subject to change or updates in the future ;w; Drawings and designs of Illya’s outfits by @rosepinkwol.

Illya’s personality is about similar with her ffxiv canon verse. Shy, reserved, very sweet and gentle. But she’s considerably more cheerful in her pokemon au form and less emotionally volatile / depressed. She still does have some lingering emotional and mental health issues though, which will be covered later.

She became a pokemon trainer primarily to explore the world and meet more pokemon. Dueling and beating others isn’t a real priority for her, though she still does it to earn money.

While Illya bets pokemon dollars in normal battles with trainers she is unfamiliar with or in official tournaments, she doesn’t like gambling real money when battling with friends. Instead, she’d often suggest that the loser has to treat the winner to a meal.

Extremely good cook. You’ll never go hungry or be unsatisfied in the tummy if you go camping with her. Just don’t mention that you like spicy foods or she’ll almost always assume that you’d be able to handle the same level of spice as she does (pro-tip: you probably can’t).

She smells like the most gorgeous mix of flowers - no thanks to her Comfey often playing with her hair and wrapping flowers around her.

She takes pokemon welfare very seriously due to her upbringing and background. She thus has a habit of releasing pokemon she captured that she feels would either be happier out in the wild or are showing signs of stress in her care. That seldom happens though, due to how loving and caring she is towards all her pokemon - most of them end up becoming very attached and even protective of her.

In the same way, she never forces a pokemon to battle, evolve or do anything they don’t want to, even if they are strong.

Illya knows a lot about pokemon care and the likes / dislikes / proper way to take care of different types of pokemon. Thus, she makes friends with pokemon a lot easier than she does humans.

The very definition of ‘gotta catch em all!’..... but only if the pokemon wants to be with her. She loves all pokemon, regardless of her personal tastes and will treat any pokemon she comes across with respect and care as long as they mean no harm to her.

Knows basic first aid for both humans and pokemon. And much like in canon, her pain tolerance is incredibly high.

She’s very particular about money. Short-change her, and she’ll be very very cross. After all, less money means less treats she can buy for her pokemon.

In general, she’s dainty and graceful... however she is a tad more clumsy in her pokemon au form compared to canon.

Illya is the definition of gap moe: her sweet, cute and angelic demeanor causes a lot of people to underestimate her. When they challenge her to a battle, they are later shocked by just how ferocious and skilled she is as a trainer.

Illya has become quite famous everywhere she travels - owing to her infectiously sweet, genuine and kind nature contrasting her ferocity and skill in pokemon battles.

She’s extremely intelligent, observant and intuitive. She often stays on the defensive for long periods of time before she works out a strategy or her opponent pokemon’s weak points before going in for the (metaphorical) kill. Reckless trainers who don’t plan accordingly are the quickest to lose to her.

She WILL order her pokemon to use stun debuffs on your pokemon (sleep, charm etc). And she won’t apologize for it.... until the battle is over.

As stated, since Illya doesn’t especially care about dueling or becoming known as the best pokemon trainer, she often doesn’t see the need to challenge gym leaders to duels unless her friends urge her to, or if beating a gym leader is required for her to be able to advance in her journey.

Illya’s an extremely good sport. She’ll congratulate you wholeheartedly if you defeat her, and will also wish you ‘good fight!’ if she beats you.

Gives the best hugs - especially to her pokemon. It’s not uncommon for people to see her giving group hugs to her pokemon after a particularly tough or difficult duel.

Illya actually has a lot of pokemon, many captured but also many that she befriended and didn’t officially ‘catch’ until they decided to follow her home. She carries a fair bunch around with her, but also left a good number of her pokemon at home to live peacefull with her father. Of course, she only enters battle with 6 pokemon at maximum, as per usual pokemon battle rules. Relationships with her main pokemon team and other notable pokemon detailed below!

While Illya is generally not one to fuss too much about her appearance or fashion, she does care about making presentable. As such, she has a more colorful and varied self-made wardrobe in her pokemon au form than she does in canon. She does however, have a favorite outfit that has become trademark to her:

A loose cloak that is fastened either with a pin or buckle, and a long flowing scarf that sways freely in the wind as she walks. Underneath her cloak, she wears a knee-length dress with a sailor collar and elbow-length sleeves and black fingerless gloves. She often switches between various hair accessories such as flower corsages, ribbons and pins. However, her brightly colored hairbands are perhaps the most well remembered to those who meet her.

Some people speculate that her scarves were sewn from the fur that was shed from her Cinccino, hence how warm and fluffy that look. Her hip length pure white hair is wrapped against her neck when she wears her scarf.

Illya’s trademark outfit in the pokemon au has two different versions: one that she wears in the spring and summer, while the other is worn in autumn and winter.

Her spring / summer attire is lighter- both in color and fabric. Her baby pink cloak is fastened with a flower pin atop her pink and purple dress. Intricate flower patterns adorns her skirt, and she wears ankle-length socks and purple flats. She also wears flower earrings

Her autumn / winter attire is made of thicker, warmer material - specifically her purple cloak which has a star print and is fastened with a buckle. Her dress is a darker blue in color, with constellation and star patterning around the edge of her skirt. There are rumors that the underside of her skirt shimmers like a starry night sky... but you’d have to be out of your mind to want to look up it to confirm said rumor. Instead of socks, she wears white tights and dark blue shoes. She also wears a star hairclip and earrings to go with her blue hairband.

Illya does not like feeling cold, and thus usually travels around wearing her cloak and scarf... however, she will on occasion take them off indoors out of respect - such as when she’s eating a meal at somebody’s house as a guest.

Illya was born to two loving parents - Cocona, a lalafellin woman who worked as a nurse at the nearest pokemon center to their home in a small, quaint town and Lachlan, an ex-pokemon trainer who retired shortly after having his name entered into the hall of fame, now settled down to live with his wife and daughter.

Cocona’s job as a nurse gave her a lot of knowledge on how to take care of pokemon, and together with her husband set up a daycare / nursery for both young and old pokemon alike, where they spent their days taking care of many different species of pokemom.

Born under those circumstances, Illya was exposed to pokemon since a very young age, and began playing with and interacting with pokemon as a toddler. She also quickly learned to help around the daycare, learning more about each different type of pokemon and how to best take care of each of their needs.

At age 9, her mother fell ill with a life-threatening disease, and in order to allow his wife to see the world before she passed on, Lachlan took Cocona away on a one year journey outside their hometown, leaving Illya alone with her aunt (Cocona’s younger sister) to take care of the pokemon daycare in their absence. Unfortunately, Illya’s aunt had a somewhat sour relationship with her sister, and was neglectful towards Illya, often leaving her unattended for extended periods of time.

Illya sought refuge and comfort from the pokemon she was tasked to take of, and for a long time, they were the only ones Illya talked to. She’d take the pokemon out flower picking, stargazing. She ate with them, slept with them and vowed to take care of them to the best of her abilities for the sake of her parents.

On a particularly terrible stormy night, the land surrounding her home became flooded with rainwater and seeped into her house. While Illya scrambled to keep the water out, her pokemon were thrown into a panic, and eventually one of the baby pidoves flew out and away from her home. Illya chased after the pidove into the woods despite the rain, the wind so strong that it caused her umbrella to be carried away into the wind.

As she ran after the pidove, she slipped and tumbled down a hill, breaking her leg. Now injured, scared and alone in the middle of the forest, the young Illya cried for help, but her voice was drowned out by the sound of the pouring rain and thunder. With nothing but the darkness of the night staring back at her and fearing that a wild animal or hostile pokemon may be lurking about and attack her, Illya attempted to crawl her way back home, but the pain from attempting to stand up only causes her to collapse once more.

It felt like the entire world had abandoned her, and just as she heard a strange noise from the shadows and feared the worse, a mimikyu approaches her from the dark and sat by her, watching over her and shielding her with its appendages, as if to reassure her that it won’t let any harm come to her.

She was found later in the morning by the people from the nearest town, who had gone over to her house to check on her only to find she wasn’t in, her pokemon panicking and gesturing towards the forest for the townspeople to look for her. The pidove was hold safely afterwards too, trembling as it took shelter in a tree.

The incident left Illya well traumatized, and stemmed her own growing self-hatred and anxiety which would only grow worse as she grew to become a teenager.

She doesn’t like talking much about what happened to her as a child, and she only ever mentions the incident to people she truly cares about and trusts. And if anybody were to ever upset her by being pushy and asking her about it when she doesn’t want to share, her Mimikyu would be the first to smack the offender in the head.

Her main pokemon team underwent a few changes over the years, but for the most part now, it’s fixed and she rarely switches members of her party out for another pokemon unless she thinks it’s really necessary.

One of the first and oldest member of her current pokemon party. Illya and her Mimikyu are inseparable.

Mimikyu had in truth been watching her since she was but a child, enviously admiring how happy her family and her pokemon in their daycare had been together. He had, on multiple occasions, attempted to show himself in order to be part of their family, but was always too cowardly to do so. He would always scurry away whenever Illya or her parents would approach, hiding in the shadows and only ever watching from a distance. He watched her even as she was left alone, and on the fateful night of that storm where Illya would find herself lost and injured in the forest, Mimikyu folllowed her.

Watching Illya cry alone in the rain, he felt a surge of protectiveness and compelled him to finally step out of the shadow to comfort and protect her through the night. Perhaps in that instance, he saw himself in Illya, someone who was scared, alone and just wanted to be loved. He could relate to Illya’s loneliness, and loved her for the way she would love and accept any pokemon, regardless of their appearance or strength.

Since that day, Mimikyu hasn’t left Illya’s side and is one of the most protective pokemon of her.

Mimikyu can often be found sitting on Illya’s head when he’s out of his pokeball and traveling around with her. He will extend his appendage out to grab any food that she offers him, or even to swat away anyone who gets too close to Illya.

Compared to other Mimikyu, Illya’s Mimikyu isn’t at all aggressive towards Pikachu. It is however, very shy and embarrassed and will attempt to hide if it spots one.

As Mimikyu only really cares about what Illya thinks, he won’t attack anyone who catches a glimpse of him under his disguise. But he will be very, very grouchy.

He gets along decently well with all her other pokemon, though it is sometimes jealous of how big and strong Corviknight is.

From a distance or as a shadow, Illya’s scarf often resembles the appendage Mimikyu extends out. Once, while the pair were out in the woods and Mimikyu was sitting on Illya’s head, it extended its appendage to grab hold of a treat Illya was offering it. A distant passerby who could not see clearly in the dark of the night mistook their silhouetted figure as being a monster - or a near and frightening mythical pokemon. The myth is still circulating to this day, and Illya has no idea that it had been caused by her and her Mimikyu.

Mimikyu doesn’t like going inside his pokeball - not that Illya would force him to. He’d of course, prefer to spend time outside with Illya. He especially never leaves her sight while she sleeps, often snuggling up to her beneath the covers or otherwise making himself comfortable in her scarf that she set aside.

He’s surprisingly, and scarily very physically strong - able to grab hold of other pokemon and even other people several hundred times larger than itself. He uses this to his advantage by grabbing people who get too close to Illya and shoving them away - and he’s not at all gentle about it.

Comfey shares Illya’s love and passion for flowers and it’s not uncommon to see her Comfey drifting around her, weaving flowers into her hair as she walked. The scent of the flower crowns Comfey weaves makes people who wear them feel relaxed, so she often wraps Illya in flowers whenever the girl is feeling particularly stressed or uncomfortable.

Comfey loves decorating hotel rooms and campsites with flowers she picks from the wild, and she seems to be particularly generous when it comes to giving out her flowers to others. Friendly, sweet and kind - it’s almost as if Comfey was an extension of Illya herself sometimes.

Comfey is the resident healer of Illya’s pokemon roster, able to not only heal the ailments of humans but also the other pokemon. She is especially active when Illya is helping out at pokemon centers or giving first aid to others. When Illya is in pain, Comfey often goes into a tearful panic.

Corviknight’s appearance almost always gives other people a heart attack. Nobody ever expects someone as small, cute and demure as Illya to have such an intimidating looking pokemon. But she does, and she is just as affectionate to him as she is with her other pokemon. Strangely, Corviknight seems to be very uncooperative to everyone except her.

Once lacking a flying type pokemon, Illya almost fell to her death after being pushed off a cliff. Corviknight caught her in midair and hid her under his wings after he landed, guarding her with a ferocious glare even as other humans attempted to check on her. Ever since, he’s ever a watchful guardian to her, glaring from behind her back even as she smiles sweetly at others.

Corviknight also serves as Illya’s main mode of transportation when she isn’t able to walk herself. As Illya loves taking her time to explore on her own two feet, she tries to not overly rely on Corviknight... sometimes, it can’t be helped however - such as when she needs to cross large bodies of water.

Interestingly, Corviknight bears a striking resemblance in both his aesthetic and personality to a hyuran pokemon trainer of dark skin and black hair who has secret romantic feelings for Illya.

Bellossom met Illya while the girl was traveling through a tropical area that has been haunted by rain clouds and dark skies for the past several days. Illya was first attracted to bellossom because of the flowers on her head, and had watched as the Bellossom danced and chanted, mesmerized when the rainclouds pulled apart and sunlight began to shine through.

The two quickly bonded, with Bellossom teaching Illya her sun summoning dance before finally, she decided to join Illya together on her journey.

She wasn’t exactly meant to be a part of Illya’s team, and for a while, she was but a mere travel companion. However, Illya noticed just how active and enthusiastic Bellossom was to battle - or perhaps she saw it as an opportunity to show off her dance to more people. Regardless, bellossom hence became a new member of Illya’s pokemon team replacing Cincinno.

If it wasn’t obvious enough, Bellossom loves to dance. She is rarely ever seen not at least swaying to its own beat while she’s outside her pokeball, and she becomes very eager when other pokemon or humans show an interest in learning her dance.

Evolved from an eevee that Illya had taken care of since she was a child, it alongside Mimikyu are the two most senior members of her current pokemon team and also the longest to have known her.

Sylveon is a free spirit, much like he had been when he was still a baby eevee. He enjoys roaming about a fair bit, though he takes care to not stray too far from Illya.

He’s very attached to Illya and much like other sylveons, understands his trainer’s emotional state well by wrapping his feelers around her hand while walking with her. Whenever Illya gets sad or upset, he often likes sitting in her lap, purring and nuzzling himself against her in an attempt to make her feel better. He also wraps his feelers around her in an attempt to soothe and calm her down whenever she cries.

Despite his adorable appearance, he’s actually very daring and fearless, never once backing down from a confrontation or fight with other pokemon even if they are multiple times his size or even if they are a type that holds an advantage against him.

Illya’s Sylveon is also very attached to Alphinaud’s Espeon, nuzzling himself to espeon whenever Alphinaud has it out.

Gardevoir was one of the latest pokemon to have joined Illya’s team. She is an extremely elegant, regal but also stoic member of the party.

Like other Gardevoir, she is able to read the future - and it was through her prediction that she foresaw her meeting with Illya and prematurely approached her. She is also able to distort dimensions and create black holes, though she rarely ever does the latter.

Much like Mimikyu and Corviknight, Gardevoir is extremely protective of Illya despite not having known her for as long as the others have and would not hesitate to expand her own psychic powers to her fullest if she feels like Illya may be in any sort of danger.

Though powerful, she doesn’t tend to like roaming about much and mostly stays within her pokeball unless Illya calls her out for food or battle.

Gardevoir’s demeanor and headstrong personality reminds Illya a lot of her late mother, and perhaps there is some deeper reason for why Gardevoir herself feels such a strong need to protect Illya as if she were her own kin.

Some of her pokemon are carried around with her as travel companions, only occasionally taking part in battles, while others are left at home to be cared for by her father.

TRAVEL COMPANIONS [to be updated as au is expanded on]

Vulpix: A male vulpix that Illya carries around and cuddles with during the winter or when she’s traveling through locations with colder climates. Out of all her pokemon who are not part of her main party of 6, vulpix is probably one of the most active and frequently called forth in battles that aren’t official tournament leagues or competitions. Illya also calls her vulpix out whenever fire is needed. He is brave and enthusiastic and hopes to one day evolve himself into Ninetales.

Dragonair: A gentle male dragonair that Illya caught near a lake one day during clear skies. It had dragged her into the sky and allowed her to ride on his back, soaring high into the clouds before dipping back down towards the waters. However, Illya lost her balance and fell into the water. He still feels bad about it to this day. He likes to curl around her to sleep.

Cinccino: A playful female cinccino who evolved from one of Illya’s minccino that she has been caring for as a child. She was once an active member of Illya’s party, but now is more of a travel companion who rarely ever battles now. Some people believe that Illya used the fur shed from Cinccino’s scarf to sew her own trademark scarf that she’s seen traveling around with now.

Rowlet: Though Illya gets along with many pokemon in general, birds in particular seem to be very fond of her. This male rowlet followed Illya as she was traveling through the woods and eventually became a part of travel party. He doesn’t see very many fights but he does love to cuddle and is very affectionate towards not just Illya but other pokemon and trainers.

Alcremie: A shy female Alcremie who offers sweets to new friends she meets. Illya often has reservations about eating the cream and berries secreted from her, but after being assured that it doesn’t at all hurt her Alcremie and that it’s offering of sweets is a sign of affection, Illya has started learning to indulge more in sweet foods more and more. Illya doesn’t have the heart to tell Alcremie she prefers spicy food, though.

Trevenant: A female trevenant that attacked a woodcutter that Illya saved while traversing through the forest. Convinced at first that Illya intended on harming the forest, it proceeded to trap her in a cage of trees until she was finally convinced to release Illya after witnessing the way Illya refused to let her vulpix burn the trees down just to escape. She follows Illya around and holds a lot of respect for the way Illya cared for nature and the environment.

Hatterene: A reclusive Hatterene Illya met during her travel. She once hated Illya, chasing her by emiting a strong psychic aura much like she does with other strangers. Upon sensing Illya’s lack of hostility and own gentle soul however, she eventually calmed down enough to allow Illya to approach. She is very moody and temperamental.

NOTABLE POKEMONS AT HOME [not including pokemon that belong to Lachlan or pokemon that belong to other people being taken care of]. List is NOT exhaustive!

Cleffa: A female cleffa born from Cocona’s retired Clefairy. As Cocona passed away shortly before cleffa was hatched, Illya became her owner / trainer instead. Though cleffa wishes to someday be a part of Illya’s team, grow stronger and evolve herself, Illya hasn’t quite allowed herself to let go of her mother’s death, and hence prefers to keep cleffa safe at home. It’s one of the rare instances where Illya has explicitly gone against a pokemon’s wishes, even if out of a genuine love and protectiveness of it.

Musharna: A female Musharna that eats the nightmares of Lachlan and any guests who come to stay over at their house. She sleeps a lot and frankly cannot care any less about battling.

Chimecho: A male Chimecho that Illya caught and took along with her on her journey for a while, before leaving him at home with Lachlan. He likes hanging himself to the roof of the house and swinging in the breeze. Not hearing chimecho’s wind chimes tells Lachlan and Illya that something is wrong.

Azurill: A male baby Azurill that Illya rescued. He is very timid and lacks a lot of confidence. He wants to get better at doing battle, but still has a lot of training to do before it can get to that point.

Beedrill: A male beedrill that was evolved from a weedle - the very first pokemon Illya ever caught in the wild on her own. She’s trained him personally as she grew up, and he saw many of her clumsy behavior and less experienced days. He’s sort of retired now, spending his days keeping the more rowdy pokemon in the daycare in check.

Theme songs

If pokemon au illya were to have a theme / ost track, it’d be this lovely re-orchestrated track of the Lacunosa Town Theme! It’s soft, peaceful and has a touch of melancholy which suits her perfectly. This, this and this remix also fits her and may double as her battle theme?

Illyanaud track mayyyybe?

Legendaries / Mythicals??

I didn’t include any legendaries or mythical pokemons into her roster because lore regarding those are that they’re very very rare BUT if Illya were allowed to have a legendary and a mythical pokemon, she’d probably own a Cresselia and a Celebi!

Cresselia, the Lunar Pokémon. Shiny particles are released from its wings like a veil. It is said to represent the crescent moon. On nights around the quarter moon, the aurora from its tail extends and undulates beautifully.

Celebi, the Time Travel Pokémon. This Pokémon wanders across time. Grass and trees flourish in the forests in which it has appeared. When Celebi disappears deep in a forest, it is said to leave behind an egg it brought from the future.

Shout out to Diancie, who is a close second choice solely based on the fact it’s design looks like what Illya would be if she herself were a pokemon.

Relationships with other OCs / NPCs

To be added!

#ffxiv #final fantasy xiv #illya skawi #headcanons #mine #the greatest treasures #pokemon au #ffxiv art #i looked over this post maybe more than fifty times now and #one half of my brain says this is long enough and nobody's gonna care to read it all #the other half is saying i should write more #THANK YOU SO MUCH KAI FOR THE ILLYA DRAWINGS #HONESTLY YOU'RE SUCH A SWEETHEART FOR MAKING MY IFFY DESIGN REQUESTS INTO A REALITY #i already have alphinaud's team planned out and what some of the extra pokemon he owns will be but #i don't have the strength...to edit graphics for him....

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speechlessxx · 4 years

Text

Bring Him Light - v (King!Steven x Reader)

Chapter Summary: Two months after the reader’s marriage to King Steven, she learns what appears to be the truth hidden in the dungeon.

Warnings: description of wounds, anxiety, no Steve in this chapter, talks of infertility

Word Count: 2.5k

<-Last Part -=+=- Next Part ->

Weeks after your marriage and the coronation that took place soon after, the crown still sat heavy at the top of your head. The weight would nearly be unbearable if it weren’t for your husband who ruled by your side. The smiles on your faces were never forced and life began to settle into an easy, steady pace. However, as the people grew accustomed to calling you their queen, they increasingly became impatient and displeased when two months has passed, and you still weren’t with child. The Rogers’ line would stop and end with Steven if he were to die without an heir.

You worried about your competency. Among the many duties of the queen, providing heirs was at the top of that list and you were still unsuccessful. However, King Steven sought to be your rock in this troubling time with your wavering confidence, assuring you that you both had a lifetime of providing heirs and to not rush it.

Even with the king’s constant assurance and kind words, you still felt like a failure.

The children of the orphanage cheered as soon as you walked through the building’s threshold. The little ones ran up to you and clung at your legs, nearly knocking you over if it weren’t for Natasha’s quick hands that shot out and steadied you. You laughed as you decided to crouch down to be eye-level with the children and opened your arms out to let them hug you. It was Sister Mary, the woman in charge of the orphanage, who disbanded the children and told the little ones to leave you be. The little ones dispersed – some going in the back gardens to play in the fountain your husband donated years ago, others playing in the courtyard, while some played inside.

One of the little girls, Abagail, took your hand and eagerly led you to her toys. You didn’t miss the way that Sister Mary eyed your midsection to peak if you would be showing any signs of a pregnancy. You saw her face fall with disappointment she realized you still had the same body as you did during the coronation.

“Everyone really wants you to have a baby,” Abagail whispered to you. You smiled at her and nodded. “Sister Mary keeps talking about how you disappoint the king because you aren’t pregnant.”

Your smile fell slightly as you listened to the little girl. She was young – you remembered Sister Mary telling you she was six on your first visit. She didn’t really know boundaries yet. “Really?” You asked.

“Yes… she says how the king’s wives are cursed with infertility and how the king grows angry and eventually kills – “

“Abagail!” Sister Mary called the little girl’s attention. The woman comes over and ushers the little girl away but the girl stood her ground. “I’m sorry, your grace. The little ones have such vivid imaginations.”

“I, too, have vivid imaginations.” You stood and shook your head. “Abby meant no harm, did you?” She shook her head with a pout as Sister Mary tells her to play with the children outside. As soon as Abagail was out of earshot, you took a step towards Sister Mary and gave her a smile. “Children are innocent. They only repeat what they hear. I only hope that you teach the children the truth. Because what she was about to say is defamatory towards the king. And I wonder how the king would tolerate such slander.”

“Of course, your grace.” She bowed her head, but her words weren’t true. She was only saying them out of duty – not respect. You were about to retaliate when Wanda called your attention.

“Your majesty,” Wanda spoke up. Your two ladies noticing the tension between you and the nun. “We should journey back to the castle. The king must be eagerly awaiting your arrival.”

“Yes.” You nodded. You glanced at Sister Mary once more and gave her another smile before making your way to the carriage.

“I only hope for your sake, your grace, that it is only rumors.” You stopped in your tracks and swallowed. You frowned as you told Natasha and Wanda that you’d meet them outside. The two ladies hesitantly walked out. You turned and glared at the nun.

“Pardon?”

“The king is cruel,” her voice was hushed but her face feigned respect and politeness. Her smile was teasing as if she knew something you didn’t. “Or at least that’s what the rumors say.” She stared at you with cold eyes and no fear. She wasn’t afraid that she was speaking out against the king in front of her queen. She believed she told the truth.

“Watch your tongue.” You snapped. A few of the children’s heads popped up at your tone. You took a deep breath to compose yourself. You didn’t want to make a scene, but the crone overstepped. “You are speaking of my husband, your king… Watch. Your. Tongue, Sister Mary.”

Sister Mary reached out suddenly and seized your wrists as she examined the now faded cuts. “I see these every time you come… I can’t help but wonder where they came from.”

“They’re not from the king. Not that it’s your business.” You muttered, snatching your hands away. “Steven is a good man and has proven to be a great king. How dare you speak of him – “

“Are you saying that to convince me or yourself? I’ve lived long under King Steven’s rule, girl. I’ve been here since Margaret and since Sharon. I’ve seen the haunted looks on their faces. I wonder how long it will be until the king breaks you down, too. And here they call the Thanos the Mad King when Brooken has harbored one for years.”

You were speechless and shaking with rage. You bit on your tongue, hard – so hard that you tasted the metallic taste of your own blood – before you turned away and rushed out. Natasha and Wanda were already in the carriage when Ser Pietro helped you in.

“What happened?” Natasha asked.

You were silent as you wiped your hands on your skirts. The carriage jostled a bit as the horses began to move. Natasha and Wanda glanced over at each other after several minutes of silence. Your irritation and anger evident in the lines of your frown as you drifted off into your mind.

The king had been nothing but kind to you in your time together. Each and every day as you both grew closer to one another, he had proven the rumors wrong. You believed he was misrepresented in York – that the servants created an image of a monster to justify the war between the North. Steven had shown you no cruelty – aside from the prisoners in the dungeon. But they were traitors who conspired against their king. Even your father would’ve shown them no mercy. It was what a king had to do… right?

“(Y/N)…” Your head snapped up and met Wanda’s concerned stare. She reached out and grabbed your hand, which you hadn’t realized had been rubbing the skin of your wrist raw. “You’ll reinjure your wrist. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing…” you muttered.

“The old crone is well, old. Don’t take her words to heart.” Natasha encouraged. “The king has been nothing but a delight has he not?”

“He has, indeed.” You nodded.

“And again, your father wouldn’t have married you off to a cruel monster.” Wanda piped up. She gave your hand a tight squeeze and offered you a smile. “Sister Mary’s like everyone else… They just can’t wait until your belly swells with a child. Brooken has waited long enough.”

“I’m not quite sure if I’m … able.” You confessed. Wanda and Natasha scoffed in response. The two girls babbled on about it being too soon to tell. “It’s been two months since the marriage. Steven and I have shared our bed for two months now and I’m still not pregnant. I’m afraid I’m a disappointment to all.”

“Don’t say that.” Natasha waved her hand. “Two months is too soon to tell, (Y/N). Besides, you heard what the doctors, the midwives, the maesters say. There’s certain periods throughout the month that make chances of conception optimal. Just because you two go at it nightly,” you flushed at her words as you stuttered a rebuttal. She held her hand up to silence you. “We’ve heard it all. Big castle, thick walls. But we’ve heard.”

“Nat – “you groaned. Your hands covered your face, bashfully.

You three laughed at your embarrassment. Natasha giggled and leaned over to grab your hand. “You needn’t worry… It’ll happen in time.”

“I hope you’re right.”

»————-　⚜　————-««

As soon as your ladies and you arrived to the castle, you were immediately greeted by Lord Rumlow and Pierce.

“I trust the visit to the orphanage went well?” Lord Pierce asked you as he bowed.

“It was lovely as it always is.” You grinned at the two lords. You wondered why they were awaiting for your arrival – or why they were speaking to you at all. Lord Pierce didn’t like you, or at least you believed he didn’t because of how he wasn’t as welcoming as Lord Barnes or Lord Wilson. Lord Rumlow simply always gave you a bad feeling just by standing beneath his stare. You knew of Steven’s distaste for the two men – especially Brock, who was next in line due to being Steven’s next blood relative. “What have I done to have you two bless me with your presence?”

Alexander’s eyes narrowed slightly at your words. They were teasing and sarcastic. He definitely saw your father in you. “We have urgent matters to discuss with the queen.” He glanced over at Natasha and Wanda who were watching the two men warily with curious frowns. “Alone, of course. It’s a matter of the council.”

“Shouldn’t my husband be in charge of this then?” You asked.

Lord Rumlow shook his head. “The new Brooken Queen must know of this matter as well. The king is very much versed.”

“Very well.” You nodded. “You may go.” You told your ladies. You exchanged confused glances before turning to the men. “Lead the way, gentlemen.”

“Of course.” Alexander nodded. He glanced over at Brock who offered you his arm and you hesitantly took it.

The walk was awkward to say the least. The two men weren’t the most ideal conversationalist and the curious stares of the servants as you passed by them did not help. Were you being led into a trap?

“Does my cousin treat you right?” Lord Rumlow asked suddenly as they turned into a familiar corridor. Your brows shot up when you realized they were leading you towards the dungeon.

“Yes, of course. King Steven has been nothing but a blessing in these past two months.” You said, honestly. You had no reason to doubt it, either.

“And the marriage… consummated?” Lord Pierce asked.

“Yes.” You answered. The two men glanced at one another as they slowly descended the steps that led to the dungeon. “Where are we going?”

“We’re acquainting you with what Steven really is…” Lord Pierce answered ominously. Your frown deepened as you tried to pull your arm away from Brock’s, but the Lord tightened his grip on you.

“Unhand me.” You ordered.

“I can’t, (Y/N).” He muttered as he pulled you along.

The men pulled you into the hall. The barred prisons with badly shaped men welcomed you. The stench assaulted your nostrils and nearly made you vomit. You passed by a man, huddled in the corner. He was asleep – or at least you hoped he was – and his mouth was wide open allowing his drool to escape. He had no teeth and his gums were bloody.

You gasped, taking a step back. You felt someone grab at your skirts. You let out a shriek as another man, so skinny you saw his ribs, grabbed at the bottom of your dress through the bars. His fingernails had been ripped off, bits of his skin seemed to have been flayed.

“What is this?” You snapped.

“Sharon?” One of the prisoners asked, his voice quaking. The vocal chords dry. You frowned, feeling your heart drop.

“These are the men that the king has imprisoned.” Pierce explained. “Good men, for the most part.”

“Steven wouldn’t have imprisoned these men for being good. There must’ve been a reason.” You argued. “Steven’s a good king.”

“Look at these men and tell me what good man would torture men to this degree?” Lord Pierce inquired. You shook your head.

“Steven said these men are traitors. He wants a bright future for Brooken and he imprisoned traitors who conspire against him. He only tortures because he… he’s looking for those who are plotting against the king.” Your voice broke as you began to shake. Tears threaten to spill but you held them in. You didn’t want to cry in front of these men – you didn’t want to look weak. You pried your hand from Brock’s grip and stumbled backwards.

“These men’s only crime was that the queen favored them.” Brock explained, grimly. “Sharon was a jewel … Young, tall, beautiful. Men grew fascinated with her and wanted the queen’s favor over the king’s. In a jealous rage, the king imprisoned those who preferred his wife.”

“No – “

“Sharon?” Another voice called. Drier than the other man.

“These men are haunted from what they’ve witnessed. Do you know what happened to Queen Sharon?” Brock asked. “Or Queen Margaret?”

“They died tragic deaths but not at the king’s hands!” You snapped. The two men stood silently as they shook their heads. They stared at you with pity as you peered through the prison. You’ve been to York’s prisons once – maybe twice – and they weren’t in this condition. The men weren’t starved, tortured. They were fed properly until their trials. “Why are you doing this?”

“You must know the monster that sits on the throne next to you.” Pierce said. “Do you know what happened to the two queens before you?”

“No.” You gave in to what they wanted. If they wanted to explain, so be it. “No, I do not.” Why was everyone tearing down the happiness you were building now after two months? Why wouldn’t anyone tell you before?

“Queen Margaret and the king fought relentlessly for months. He needs heirs. She didn’t want to bear a child. They fought and fought. Until one day, the king finally had enough of her. He stabbed her through the heart in the throne room. No one saw except for the council. No one knew how to react. No one wanted to act out against the king. So, we watched her bleed out on the floor as she stared at the man she loved, who took away her life.

Queen Sharon was defiant. She refused to sleep in the same bed chamber as the king. He needed an heir. She steadily turned him away. These men,” Pierce gestured to the prisoners, “all wanted favor with the queen. Steven thought she was attempting to start a coup against him. When it was proven she was not, it made him believe that these men were her lovers. So, in an act of cruelty, the king beheaded her in front of them.” He pointed to where you were standing – in the center of the room where all could see you. “Right where you’re standing.”

“That’s the man you married, Queen (Y/N).” Brock said. “That’s the true King Steven.”

Your eyes watered, but still, you refused to cry. “I’d like to leave now.”

“We will accompany you, then.” Lord Rumlow nodded. He offered his arm again but you refused. You turned around, ignoring the pleas and the begs from the prisoners and walked up the stairs in silence.

You winced as the bright sunlight welcomed you, contrasting with the darkness of the dungeon. You turned to the two men and bowed your head as they bowed to you. “Thank you for this ... er... eyeopening excursion, my lords.” You felt your voice crack at the end but you remained calm. “It’s been a pleasure.”

“Likewise, your grace.” Pierce nodded before you walked off.

Unbeknownst to you, King Steven was peering around the corner and his fists were shaking with rage.

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers #steve rogers imagine #king!steve rogers #king!steve rogers x reader #king!steve rogers imagine #chris evans imagine #chris evans x reader #chris evans #captain america x reader #captain america #brock rumlow #brock rumlow x reader #bring him light

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colderthancoldest · 3 years

Text

Ceasefire

(Read on Ao3 here)

Inspired by: this ask

Word Count: ~1.8k

Summary: Thirteen and Dhawan!Master both really need a hug.

(Fluff piece, hugs, no warnings apply)

Occasions on which the Doctor and the Master pause from their perpetual battles is rare. Over the years, it's gotten less and less common. Back when they were young, all of this- all the battles over Earth, all the threats, all the traps- were much more playful, and so was much easier to pause so that the two of them might grab a bite together and partake in each other's familiar company. However, over time, each slash at each other began to cut deeper and deeper in some failing attempt to 'win' a game that could never be won.

They both loved their fights, they both needed the challenge- but at times, it could become too much. Even for a Time Lord. Or... maybe not a Time Lord, now that they both knew there never really was such a thing.

Point was, their limits had finally been reached. The threshold for pain inflicted upon each other had finally been hit and they both needed time to recuperate before any scheme and/or heroics could resume.

The Master would say it was the Doctor who yielded first.

The Doctor would say it was the Master who suggested it.

Either way they looked at it, a few text messages back and forth from numbers that used to belong to friends later and the Doctor and the Master were staring each other down from opposite sides of the open field.

They had chosen a spot in the middle of nowhere to partake in their agreed upon ceasefire. A place that was hidden by the safety of tall trees and knee-high wildgrass that hid their mutual interest in a way that suggested being nice to each other was the greatest possible sin.

"We agree that this will never be spoken of again? As per our prior arrangement?" the Master questioned skeptically, with a low flat tone and his fists clamped shut.

"Completely. No one will ever know. We keep our mouths shut until long after our souls leave our bodies to rot," the Doctor agreed firmly.

The Master gave a nod to confirm this.

They stood there for a moment more, staring each other down. It was an old concept, but new in practice.

"Are... you okay?" the Doctor asked as the Master shifted from foot to foot, visibly uncomfortable.

The Master shook his head sharply and ignored the way the tips of his ears began to burn red.

"You don't get to ask me that. Not after everything you've done to me. Everything you've put me through," the Master growled through gritted teeth. "I doubt you've ever stopped running long enough to consider the extent of it."

The Master's words didn't linger for long before the Doctor cut through the stillness.

"Me?" the Doctor asked sharply. "What about you! You've killed people. A few years' penance on Earth is the very least you deserve."

"A few years?!" the Master chuckled in the manic, agonizing way he laughed.

He shook his head and caught himself before he could lose his patience.

"Don't push me," he threatened through gritted teeth.

The Doctor took a deep breath of her own.

"Right. That's not why we're here," she reiterated.

The Master gave a nod and took a breath of his own.

"Honestly... I don't want to talk about it either," the Doctor confessed.

She rubbed her arm and stared off at the ground.

The Master's eyes stayed locked on the dirt as well.

After a moment- a long and terrifying moment, the Doctor took a step forward.

The Master instinctively lifted his fists to defend himself at the sign of movement. After a brief second, he shamefully lowered them and attempted to play it off as if it was nothing.

The Doctor let out a sigh, reached out, and... hugged him.

Her arms reached around him, over the Master's own arms where they remained at his sides, and held him.

"I'm... glad you're still alive..." the Doctor admitted softly.

She could hear and feel the Master's breathing speed up and leave his lips unevenly as he froze in place.

It took him a minute to react at all.

The Doctor held him, pressed her face to his shoulder, and let her hands rest on his upper back as she simply soaked in the moment.

All at once, the Master comprehended the act and returned the embrace. He pulled her tight and firm and practically melted against her. His face hid in her shoulder, against the fabric of her coat, and his arms wrapped around her as if he was terrified she would disappear at any moment.

The Doctor could feel from the tense muscles and mild shake of his shoulders that he was fighting tears. She didn't comment on it and instead let her own tears splash down as she let out a small breath of relief.

The Master eventually spoke again. A weak, cautious whisper that the Doctor could only hear because his face was so close to her right ear.

"I haven't been hugged before," he confessed quietly. The words didn't even sound like they were directed at the Doctor. It felt more as if they'd slipped out in a moment of weakness and abrupt realization.

"Not this me, anyways," he continued softly. "And certainly never like this."

He paused, struggling to collect himself long enough to speak.

"I know the feeling," he elaborated, "from lives past."

He shook his head and buried it closer to the Doctor's collar, as if he could hide there. Away from his own words and the emotions that overwhelmed him.

"I... know what it should feel like. I've always know."

He paused. He hesitated.

He trembled as he pressed closer to the Doctor. As if, if he could get close enough, he would be safe, tucked away in her arms.

The Doctor's vision blurred as she willingly pulled him closer and brushed one palm across his upper back to sooth him. She could feel shivers and tremors wrack through his exhausted body as he bit back his emotions.

"This... is far better," he breathed.

The Doctor let out a small chuckle of relief as she carefully soothed the tense muscles of the Master's shoulder within her reach. There was scarring there, scar tissue grown over wounds the Master had never let her know he had. Wounds... that were a direct result of the Doctor's abandonment.

Even so, the Master pressed closer with everything he could. He held her as tight as he could- or at least, as much as he could without hurting her. He clung to her, pretending he would never have to let go- or rather, that she would never leave him- again.

The Doctor kept him safe in her arms and did what little she could to calm him.

They were both a mess of tears by now, but neither was willing to admit it.

The Doctor closed her eyes as she settled her face towards the Master's jaw.

"I... know what you mean..." she agreed softly.

She sighed. "Every new life we're... the same, but also somebody else entirely. I know what the people I knew were like, but I don't know them personally anymore.

Someone... else knew them. Someone else did all those things. And this new me... I've just taken their place."

The Master remained quiet.

"But not you," the Doctor smiled.

The Master shifted closer.

"You never minded-" the Doctor continued, "-that every new me was different, that I had to learn you over again and again. You were patient with me... when you were O."

The Master tensed, but refused to look at her.

"Why did you wait so long?" the Doctor asked softly.

What she was really asking was why he was the Doctor's friend for so long when he could have revealed himself at any time. Why did he wait for her.

The Master shook his head against her.

His voice was weak and soft yet steady when he finally replied.

"You're mine," he grumbled firmly, with the confidence of someone who knew his words were indisputable fact.

The Doctor only chuckled through her silent tears.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

The Master paused briefly to think over this response. He knew the answer well- but not how to explain it.

"This you is the match for this me. I had to wait," he said, faintly annoyed. "For our timelines to line up again... for this you."

The Doctor chuckled again, more warmly this time.

"And?" she asked, "Was I worth it?"

A low rumble of a laugh purred from the Master's throat.

"Are you kidding? This you is the most cruel, ignorant, insufferable bastard I could ever have the misfortune of knowing. And, insult to injury, you give decent hugs."

The Doctor could practically feel him smirk.

"Of course you were worth the wait."

The Doctor laughed, warm and wholeheartedly, and even the Master let a chuckle of his own slip through.

"And I suppose," the Doctor rolled her eyes playfully, "you're reasonably tolerable yourself."

"Careful, Doctor. That nearly makes it sound like you don't hate me," the Master prodded amusingly.

The Doctor bushed her fingers over the back of the Master's head. She gently fixed his hair into place and then sighed with a heavy heart.

"Of course I don't hate you, you idiot."

The Master fell silent but let out a small hum as he settled down. The fear and uneasiness from when he had arrived had long since faded, and the Doctor's own worries disappeared along with them.

They both wanted to apologize- for so many, many things- but neither did.

When their legs grew tired, they allowed themselves to settle onto the soft ground, hidden among the grass and beneath the towering trees.

Without anyone to witness, far from even their Tardises' prying eyes. Without hope, that any of this whatever-it-was between them could ever be fixed. And without any reward, without the equal shares in the universe they had promised each other in lives long past.

They layed there until they fell asleep beneath the beautiful stars as they did their best to forget all the now-broken promises they had once made beneath them.

"I don't hate you either," the Master eventually divulged once they were both more than half-asleep in each others' arms.

"Never completely. Although it would certainly be easier if I did."

The Doctor hummed a warm acknowledgement, but knew better than to reply. If they pretended not to hear what the other said, then they would never have to address the difficult matter.

By the next time they met, they would be at each other's throats again. There was no doubt about it.

By this time tomorrow, they would be wishing this had never happened and doing their very best to forget the warmth it brought to their lonely hearts.

However, for now, they both needed a hug from the person they cared about most. And it was through no fault of their own that the person dearest to their hearts, and their most hated enemy, just so happened to be one in the same....

#I hope you like it anon! :)#doctor who #dw #thoschei #spydoc #doctor who fic #my post #thirteenth doctor #dhawan!master #dhawan master

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wingedchildqueen · 4 years

Text

Thunderstorm Kisses

Well my god. I wrote this five years ago, under my old tumblr account that I deleted by mistake and thought I had lost it forever, as I had also lost the laptop I typed it on. I suddenly remembered the name of it and took a chance searching it up and what do you know. Tumblr aint completely useless. The post still exists even though the account is dead. This is a dead fandom, I’m quite aware but I’m posting it here for documentation sake and for any lucaya fans who may be still floating around on this god forsaken platform. Much love and happy reading. P.S My writing has gotten better since this was written (God I hope) lol but I have not edited or altered anything because I think my 18 year old self's writing style should be left as it is for the sentimentality of it all. Warning: This is so cringy, cheesy and teeny boppy (if that's a thing) eeekk

He’d always wondered what she tasted like. If her kisses would be as electric as the thunderstorm in her eyes. He knew it was wrong to have these thoughts when he had been in a relationship with her best friend for almost two years, and he loved Riley, he really did. But when this girl was always in his face , challenging him, teasing him and threatening him relentlessly, all he could do was stare down at this raging blond fury, and over time he happened to notice that she had the pinkest lips he had ever seen, almost perfectly shaped, with a permanent smirk that was always directed at him and he began to wonder what they tasted like.

He would catch himself thinking about her at the most random times. Strawberry lips and sunshine hair would flood his mind and afterwards he would hate himself for it because he knew he should be thinking about warm chocolate eyes and chestnut hair, but it was hard to do that when a sea of electric blue always invaded and washed away these thoughts.

After almost two years of letting her verbally and physically abuse him, he had finally begun to fight back. Not because he was sick of it, or because he wanted to hurt her, but because he knew she liked when he did, and he would do anything to see that fire in her eyes intensify. The first time he had actually fought back, by responding to one of her verbal jabs with a very clever remark in his opinion, her eyebrows had shot up in surprise and he was not sure if he should stay or run from her wrath, but surprisingly she had smiled. Though, he could not have been sure, because it had only lasted for an instant, until her face fell back to its usual smirk and she proceeded to call him one of her ever creative names in response. He noticed that she smiled a lot, especially with Riley, but he also noticed that a lot of her smiles were always a little too hard, or with a little too much teeth and they never really reached her eyes. He had never seen someone so committed to assuring the happiness of their best friend. She would sell her soul for Riley. Riley’s happiness was Maya’s occupation and he wished that she realized her happiness was important too and sometimes he would want so badly to tell her she was worth everything and more, and she deserved the world but he could not do that. They would be no windowsill conversations between them, no heart to hearts because he was Ranger Rick and she was his girlfriend’s best friend. And that was that.

He found her crying one time, underneath a staircase at school. He had never seen her cry before. The school was nearly empty and Riley had had cheerleading practice. He was not sure what to do at first, if he should just walk away and call Riley, but then a sob came from her that nearly broke his heart, and never in his life had he felt such a need to fix someone. She sat in the corner of the staircase, her knees drawn to her chest and her face in her hands, her hair cascading down her shoulders. Her shoulders shook and his insides hurt. He didn’t think she knew anyone was looking at her so he called her name. She remained in the same position and he called her name again. No response. She had to have heard him. She probably thought if she didn’t acknowledge him he would eventually go away but he refused to do anything of that sort. Without a second thought, he walked towards her tiny figure and slid down the wall next to her. He felt her body tense and then put his arm around her, pulling her into him. She lay stiff in his arms but he held on. After a few minutes he felt her finally relax against him and her head fell heavily against his shoulder. Her sobs had subsided but she still shook a little. His grip tightened and he rested his head against hers. Never did someone fit so perfectly in his arms. He heard her sigh, a sigh that sounded like it was filled with so much world weariness. They never spoke of it afterwards, it was as if it had never happened and though she had never told him to, he knew he was not supposed to tell Riley that he had found her crying. It was an unspoken agreement. The only acknowledgment that he got that had proven what had happened had not been a figment of his imagination was when the very next day their eyes had locked briefly across their lunch table with Riley and Farkle in the cafeteria and she had given him a small smile. Of gratitude? He couldn’t be sure but he thinks it was probably the most genuine smile he had ever seen on her face, even though her lips had only slightly turned upwards, but no matter how small, it had gotten to her sea glass eyes.

He could feel there dynamic slowly changing. He wasn’t sure he could say they were becoming friendlier with each other but they were becoming…something more than just two teenagers who tolerated each other for the sake of a mutual friend. They no longer needed Riley to be there to feel comfortable in each other’s presence. One day, all four of them, him, Riley, Farkle and Maya, were supposed to meet at “Topanga’s” to hang out but it had just ended up being the two of them as Farkle had ditched them to hang out with the AV club and Riley had to babysit Auggie at the last minute. He would have thought that Maya would have left to go and help Riley with Auggie but surprisingly she had stayed and it was then he had found out that she was a really good listener. Sitting opposite each other in one of the booths, with her hands clasped together on top of the table she listened as he told her about Texas sunsets, and how beautiful the horses looked when they ran together in the fields and how he had always woke up at five every morning to do things around his grandparents farm. He told her how much he missed his old home and his family and how sometimes New York could be so suffocating with all its skyscraper buildings and millions of people. Not once did she call him a name or interrupt him as he told her, she just listened. At the end of it, it was silent for a moment and she just stared at him with her piercing eyes, as if she was searching for something in him. After a moment she leaned back and said to him,

“ Even though here might not feel like home, always remember that we will always be your family, no matter what.” She told him this without her gaze ever wavering from his face and he thinks that that was the moment he started to fall in love with her.

He began to walk her home nearly every day after school especially on the days when they all hung out till dark. The first time he did, he realized how far she lived from Riley’s house, nearly five blocks and her neighborhood was not exactly the safest, especially in the night. The first few times she fussed about it and told him it wasn’t necessary but eventually she realized she could not convince him otherwise and it became a pattern. No matter how much she claimed she could take care of herself he always noticed how she would draw nearer to him whenever they walked passed a dark ally or she received a random catcall from a pedestrian across the street. In those moments it would take everything he had within him to prevent himself from enclosing her hand in his just to assure her that he was right here beside her, that nothing in hell could hurt her with him here. In those walks he found out a lot about her. That her mom changed jobs all the time and worked triple shifts and sometimes days would go by without her seeing her. He learned that her sick grandmother lived with them and that she tried to get home as soon as possible to make her dinner and watch tv with her. He got the impression that aside from Riley, her Grandma was her best friend. Her eyes always lit up when she spoke of her.

One day after almost six months of walking her home, she finally invited him inside. He could see how nervous she was as she fumbled open the door of the apartment. “It’s not much,” she had mumbled to him and he had told her he didn’t care if she lived in a box on the worst alley in New York. She laughed at that and he saw her relax a little. Her laugh was like a drug to him, and like any addict, whenever he rarely evoked one from her, he found himself on this high. She introduced him to her grandmother who hugged him with a grip so fierce it startled him. He could have seen that she had been beautiful when she was younger. He now knew where Maya had gotten her looks from. Her grandmother had held his hand while sitting on her rocking chair and studied him for a significant amount of time, with eyes very similar to Maya’s. She then turned to Maya and announced that it was abnormal for a boy to have such a beautiful face. He laughed and then heard Maya scoff behind him. He turned to her and winked and she rolled her eyes. She walked towards the small kitchen and he swore he glimpsed a smile that she tried to hide behind her hair. He helped her make dinner, despite her refusal, and though it was only Mac and cheese, it was probably the best meal he had ever had as he ate next to her on the couch in the living room, opposite her grandmother as they watched some Spanish soap opera with no english subtitles. Though he had no idea what they were saying he laughed along with Maya and her grandmother and he thinks this was the happiest he had ever seen her. Afterwards he stood next to her in the kitchen by the sink as she washed the dishes and he dried and in that moment he felt like this was something he would like to do for the rest of his life, not just wash dishes, but just stand next to her, unconsciously bumping shoulders, and brushing fingers, as she passed the dishes to him, that sent shivers down his spine.

He helped her make dinner at least three times a week and her grandmother loved him. She would pass him worried looks whenever her grandma barely touched her food, which was most nights, and he would fix the antenna on the television on the nights they tended to get a lot of static. He looked forward to these nights, more than anything else and though she would never admit it, he didn’t know how grateful Maya was for him coming. He made her nights less lonely.

One night, just after they had washed the dishes, they heard thunder rumble outside and in a few minutes there was a full out storm raging outside. They stood by the window and watched as lightning streaked the sky outside. He felt her turn her head to watch him and he met her gaze. She shrugged her shoulders and turned on her heel, heading for her room. How he knew that that was her way of giving him permission to stay the night? He wasn’t sure, but at some point they had begun to understand each other without the use of words. He stood still for a moment and eventually followed her into the room where she had already thrown a sheet and pillow on the floor for him. He told her that he could sleep on the couch but she just shook head, mumbling something about her grandma groaning in the night and he would never get any sleep on the couch.

Later on, they lay in the dark, with him on the floor and Maya on her bed. They lay in silence and he listened to her breathing and thought of a lot of things. He thought of Riley, innocent Riley, who was probably sleeping and he felt guilty because she was so kind, and beautiful and loving and he didn’t deserve any of it as he lay on the floor of her best friend’s bedroom, her best friend who he was falling in love with one Spanish soap opera at a time. And then he thought of Maya, and everything she was, and how brightly she burned in this black and white life she did not deserve and how underneath the entire tough façade she put on at school she was just a girl trying to hold it all together the best that she could with a sick grandmother and an almost absent mother and he thought of how he so much wanted to give her a life she deserved.

He heard ruffling of sheets and then the thudding of feet landing on the floor and the next thing he knew she was lying next to him. There was absolutely no physical contact, and they both just lay there, staring at the ceiling and he could feel her warmth, so close to him, part of her hair, which was fanned out on the floor tickled his neck. He turned on his side to look at her and she mirrored him and they both lay staring at each other intently. He fell asleep drowning in a sea of blue.

They didn’t talk about how the next morning they woke up wrapped up in each other, feet intertwined and his arms around her and her face in his neck. They didn’t talk about how they lay there for a few moments, without moving, even though they both were already awake and should have long detangled. Those things remained unspoken.

He could feel Riley beginning to suspect something. Innocent Riley who should not have to suspect these kinds of things. He wasn’t sure exactly what had made her aware of it, maybe it was the lingering glances between him and Maya in the cafeteria or the fact that Maya taunted him less and less these days or that he and Maya stood a little too close to each other by the lockers. She could feel her eyes on him at certain times, especially when they hung out together as a group and he couldn’t help but feel terrible. It wasn’t as if they had kissed or anything but he could feel Riley’s eyes burning into him and feared that she could see into his mind and see exactly what he was thinking. Maya, Maya, Maya.

He knew Maya could feel her suspicion too and they cut down his number of visits to once a week as much as he hated it. It wasn’t as if they were doing anything wrong even though, in reality they really were.

One afternoon, both him and Maya stood at Riley’s locker waiting for her to finish cheerleading practice. They had begun to laugh about something, something entirely stupid but it had him gasping for breath as he laughed and she bent over holding her stomach. They were a mess, even though whatever it was had not even been that funny. He steadied her from toppling over with laughter and she leaned against him heavily. Eventually they calmed down, leaning against the lockers with their shoulders pressed against each other. He looked at her, her hair an absolute mess and laughed, gently pushing a strand of her hair behind her ear and smoothing down the rest with his two hands. She smiled as he did this and suddenly there faces were so close to each other and he could feel her breath on his face with the scent of peppermint and she was so close and so warm and……

He heard someone clearing their throat and there stood Riley, her hands clenched at her sides and they both straightened up. He hated being responsible for that look of hurt in her eyes. Maya looked down at her shoes and he felt sorry for her as well. She had been trying so hard , all her life, to protect her friend from the hurt of the world and here she was, the person to hurt her, sealed and delivered.

Him and Riley’s three year relationship ended that night over the phone with a lot of silence and sharp words from her side of the conversation. You would think after three years he would feel hurt and be mourning the loss if his girlfriend, but instead, he felt free. He called Maya but she did not answer the phone. He tried a few more times but it went straight to voicemail.

He thought that maybe she just felt bad about the entire Riley situation and that at school he would assure her that everything was alright and that Riley was not even that mad anyways, but for three days she didn’t show up to school and he felt a panic rise in him. He didn’t ask Riley because she still wasn’t talking to him and obviously Farkle, his supposed best friend was taking her side. She still would not pick up her phone and with nothing else to do he found himself walking towards her apartment after school. He knocked on her door loudly and anxiously. There was no response. Where was she? He knocked again and shook the handle only to find that the door was open. The pace of his heart increased rapidly and his palms began to sweat. Why was her door open and why did he suddenly feel so scared? He slowly pushed open the door and there she sat on the couch, in front of the television that blasted a Spanish soap opera. As familiar as this scenario was to him, he could not help but feel something was missing. Only then did he realize the empty rocking chair and the door to her grandmother’s room that was wide open showcasing a stripped mattress and boxes on the floor for packing. Everything connected and his eyes fell back to her on the couch, knees drawn to her chest and unseeing eyes glued to the television. If he looked closely he could have seen that her hands trembled as they wrapped around her legs. He could see that she was trying desperately to hold herself together. “Oh Maya,” he said and he dropped his book bag to the floor and made his way to the couch. He enveloped her into his arms and this time she didn’t tense but completely melted into him. She buried her face in his chest and he rested his chin on her head, smoothing his hand over her hair and she cried and shook and soaked his t-shirt with her tears. And in that moment he held her together.

He held her hand at the funeral and stayed with her at the grave until everyone else left so she could say her goodbyes without the whole world to witness and just him, and he was not allowed to stay because he didn’t matter, but because he did. He took her for ice cream afterwards instead of them going back to the apartment to be surrounded by sad stories and the sickening smell of flowers. He tried to make her laugh and she appreciated it even though the most she could muster was a bitter smile. They stood on the sidewalk outside the ice cream shop and he held her hand tightly and whispered to her that it was all going to be okay and she rested her head on his shoulder. Death sucked, but it sucked a little less when you had someone to hold onto.

The first time he kissed her, they were on her fire escape. They had started to sit there a lot now because watching Spanish soap operas just really was never the same anymore. He was telling her about the stars in Texas and how when you looked up at night you could see billions of them dotting the sky unlike the too bright city of New York that drowned out the night sky. They lay on their backs looking at the sky and he had challenged her that she probably could not even count twenty stars in New York’s night sky. Of course she had looked at him determinately and started to count, hell bent to find twenty-one stars, the one extra just to make him look like an ass. And of course she did count twenty one stars exactly and she raised her arms in triumph above her head and then turned to give him the most breathtaking smile he had ever seen. This smile met her eyes and lit up her entire face, and she was brighter than any Texas sky. He took her face in both his hands and kissed her. She tasted like coffee and strawberries and Spanish soap operas and night skies and he loved her so much his heart hurt. She pulled away from him and looked at him, her eyes wide and questioning. He nodded his head in response to her unasked question and pulled her back in and his hands threaded through her sunshine hair. Her hands wrapped behind his neck and their bodies fit in ways that was too perfect too describe.

He no longer had to wonder if her kisses were as electric as the thunderstorm in her eyes. They were. And she tasted like everything he could ever want and in her arms and lost in her lips, he knew;

He was home

#lucaya #girl meets world #rileymatthews #maya hart #sabrina carpenter #rowan blanchard #lucayafic #farkle minkus #lucas #peyton meyer #girlmeetsworldfanfiction

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ampleappleamble · 3 years

Text

—

Axa could feel them watching her as they settled into their room at the Goose and Fox that night, could feel them wanting to know her. Not only so they could understand why she had done what she had with Purnisc and Kaenra, but also so they could (no doubt) uncover and examine all the painful, humiliating life experiences behind her every decision, all her successes and failures, and then judge her accordingly. Like kith will, she thought, of course. That’s normal and healthy to think.

Genuine concern mingled with morbid curiosity, hung palpably over the group like a scythe posed to reap as everyone sat in awkward silence and waited for Axa to break the silence. So she drained her goblet, got out her pipe and her whiteleaf, and with a grim sense of determination, she told them about it.

About the career she'd built back in Ixamitl, where she had lucked into a scholarship to one of her hometown's more prestigious lore colleges, bestowed on her by a generous politician acquainted with her father. Because she'd always loved to learn and hear stories about kith from around the world, she had chosen to put her good fortune to good use and study to become a naturalist, concerning herself with the cultures and languages and histories that constituted the kith population of Eora.

While most of her colleagues had decided to specialize in Vailian– a popular choice for the political or business-oriented crowd– Axa fancied herself an intellectual, and so she had challenged herself with mastering Ordhjóma: the exotic, mysterious language of the Glamfellen, separated for 10,000 years from their tropical Sceltrfolc cousins in the far-flung, frozen south, in The White that Wends. She had thrown herself into her studies, blowing through massive tomes and ancient scrolls like a hurricane, outperforming her peers with ease. Within four years, Axa had risen like a Dawnstar to the top of her class.

And then the field work had begun.

"It's one thing to read about a people, learn their language from books and study up on their culture," Axa explained, stuffing her pipe slowly, taking her time. "It's quite another to visit their homeland, speak with them, live among them. I was barely seventeen, I'd never even been out of the city..."

Kana winced, painful recognition in his black eyes. "Culture shock can be particularly difficult for younger scholars. We have certain expectations after all our years of academic study, and to find out that the genuine article doesn't quite measure up after all that work can feel disorienting and disappointing. There's not only the shock, there's anger at the natives, and then the guilt over said anger..."

Axa accepted Aloth's proffered light while Kana trailed off– it always delighted her, using arcane flame for something so trivial as a smoke– and sighed. "That's what was really odd about it. I did experience some culture shock, but ultimately the problem wasn't me. It was them. I know it sounds like I'm just being bitter, but... honestly, for whatever reason, the whole village really was actively freezing me out."

"Nice," Edér chuckled, grinning at the unintentional pun until Aloth's glare chastised him back into solemnity.

"No one wanted to talk to me," Axa continued. "Oh, I tried, incessantly, but they just... kept turning away, or answering with nonsense or... or riddles. My colleagues had little difficulty integrating, but I felt like I was just barely tolerated by the villagers. I tried asking the other students about it, but they either feigned ignorance really well or they honestly couldn't tell what these Glamfellen had against me."

"Some sort of... racial prejudice, perhaps?" Aloth looked as uncomfortable as he sounded, but at least the topic was finally broached. Axa shrugged.

"I don't think so, but I honestly have no idea. The other three scholars with me weren't orlans, but they weren't Glamfellen either. And no one ever specifically said anything about my being an orlan."

Sagani nodded. "In my experience, while most Glamfellen tend to be as standoffish as any elf– no offense, Aloth– they don't usually have specific prejudices like that."

"Right? Ordinarily, unity and hospitality are taken very seriously in the frozen south; to support one another is indispensable to survival. Nevertheless, I couldn't figure out what I was doing wrong by them, and it was driving me out of my gods damned mind. I was supposed to be studying local accents, dialects, and colloquialisms, but that's somewhat difficult when nobody will actually speak with you. So I ended up spending a lot of time eavesdropping on people, mostly outside, by myself."

Sagani shook her head, drawing her whetstone across her hunting knife. "Bad idea to go it alone out there in the White. All kinds of dangers hiding in the snow."

The orlan barked a sharp, sardonic laugh. "You're telling me. That's how I met Vaargys."

As soon as his name was out of her mouth, Axa could feel her entire demeanor transform, and the atmosphere in the room with her. It was the first time she'd said his name since she'd left home, and even though she knew they'd already been listening, her little audience really seemed to be listening now. She felt her face get warm and her eyes sting from the impending tears, so she turned to the window, trying hard to focus on the streets outside and not at her own reflection in the glass.

Come on, girl. You’ve run far enough. It's time you faced this.

"I spotted him from afar one day at dusk: a dark, distant, shaggy figure out there among the rocks, shambling around just beyond the village's borders. It took me a few minutes to even realize he was kith. My colleagues noticed me watching him eventually, warned me away from him: the 'wild man' the locals called the 'Cursed Vagabond,' the 'Exiled Priest.' And he was out there all alone, struggling to survive because nobody wanted him around, and no one could say why..."

"You had a lot in common," Aloth murmured gravely. It wasn't difficult to see where this story was going. And he couldn't help but think it sounded similar, thematically, to one he knew quite well.

"And kith will paint a face on a rock with their own blood if it means they can have someone to talk to," Sagani sighed sadly, sympathy heavy in her chest. She could see where this was going too, and she dug her fingers into the thick fur on the back of Itumaak's neck for comfort. He grunted in appreciation.

"So I introduced myself, like you do. He was... cautious, but receptive. It helped that I'd brought gifts." Axa exhaled, and blue smoke curled up before her, walling her off. "We got to know one another, and over time we became fond of each other. We started sharing meals and stories about ourselves, our lives. He told me he was a priest of Wael, self-taught, and exiled from his clan for venerating the Eyeless Face instead of the Beast of Winter... He let me get close to him, cut his hair, tend to his wounds..." The tears spilled over at last, and she paused for a moment, hid her face.

"And you fell in love," Sagani finished for her. Classic. Tale as old as time.

Axa smiled again even as she brushed her tears away, dragging her little fist across her golden brown cheeks. "And I fell hard. I was his first real friend, gave him his first kiss. And very soon, I became his first lover." This made the men blush and look away. Axa and Sagani paid them no heed.

"I was fascinated by him, and he adored me. We made our own little world together there in the caves, in the snow. And we lived there, separate from everyone and everything else. Until I had to return to Ixamitl, of course. But I had a plan: Before I could talk myself out of it, I asked him to marry me– the very night before I was to return to the Eastern Reach. ...Gods, I had known him for only five months."

"And... wait, how old were you?" Edér spoke up for the first time since Axa had started her story, confusion clear on his face.

"I– Seventeen, almost eighteen by the time I went back home," she clarified, miffed at the interruption. "I'm twenty-two, now."

The blond man held his hands out in front of him, squinting at his fingers, baffled. "And... and how old were you when you left home? Hey, how old was he?"

Kana sighed and leaned over, patting him on the shoulder with one huge hand and confiscating the man's pipe with the other. "Erh– Never mind that now, my friend. Please, Axa, continue." He smiled that big, toothy smile at the little woman, and she blinked very slowly.

"...I brought him home to meet my family and colleagues, to assist me in my studies since all I'd really brought back from the Land was him, and ultimately, hopefully, to become my husband. In the interest of brevity– albeit somewhat belated– here’s how all that turned out: my family and colleagues hated and distrusted him, and after I had defended him so fiercely I'd alienated myself from most of my peers, I found out that about three-quarters of everything he'd ever told me about his home and his language was complete horseshit and all of our work together was complete bunkum. So! I burned it all in a big bonfire behind our house before telling him to leave and never come back." She ticked her misfortunes off on her fingers as she described them, her hands trembling, and then gesticulated fiercely before letting her fists fall to the small tabletop before her. "And then... I left, too. And now, here I am."

...Gods, that was easy. Much easier than I thought it'd be. Why was it so–

She rambled on before she could lose her nerve. "So. That's why I... wanted to do that for Kaenra. My fiancé lied to me and fucked up my life, too, and I can't just ignore that kind of shit when I see it anymore." She sighed, turning to the window again with her pipe still burning away in her hand. "Vaargys is the reason I had to leave my home and everything I've ever known, because his lies ruined my career and my academic standing and my reputation. How could I just stand by and watch as it happened to someone else?"

"Yet, you advised Kaenra to forgive Purnisc?" Aloth twisted his fingers together in his lap, staring at them rather than looking at Axa as he spoke. "After... all he'd done?"

Sagani glanced at him, narrowing her eyes as he reached up to smooth his hair– and wipe away a stray bead of sweat in the process. Is it my imagination, or is he...?

Axa kept her gaze fixed on the street below. "Yeah, that sort of surprised me too, to be honest." She spotted a stray soul, its violet wisps of essence drifting slowly amongst the city goers, and she squeezed her eyes shut, felt them burn behind her eyelids. "I suppose... I just got the feeling that it wasn't too late for them, that what they had for each other wasn't so broken it couldn't be repaired. Vaargys and me... not so. There was no coming back from what he'd done, and we both knew it."

"Whatever became of him? Of Vaargys?" Kana leaned forward eagerly, his eyes shining with compassion. For once, he actually wasn't taking notes on the conversation, and Sagani noticed that, too.

Axa opened her eyes, and saw the lost soul on the street no more. She shuddered. "After I confronted him, Vaargys simply... left. Vanished into the horizon, just as abruptly as he'd first appeared to me. And then, I got to clean up after him– after us– all alone. I wasn't up to the task; wasn't really up to the task of anything but hiding in bed and regretting my entire life. I could really only scrape together the wherewithal every now and then to go out and sell off or give away all the ridiculous trinkets and baubles we'd accumulated together. A few of the things I tried to get rid of turned out to be stolen, of course– big surprise, Axa, he's a thief and a liar– which did my already brutalized image no favors. Nor my purse, when I was obliged to pay out of my pocket for his chicanery."

"Villain," Kana spat, shaking his head slowly. "Scoundrel! ...Oh, how dastardly, to sow discord between the woman he loves and her neighbors and colleagues, then to abscond, completely free of reproach!" His sorrowful frown was as huge and expressive as his smiles always were, almost theatrically so.

Sagani just barely looked over in time to spot Aloth surreptitiously roll his eyes, and she couldn't suppress her grin. I thought so. Ondra's Lure, they're pretty obvious now that I think of it...

The elf cleared his throat and took the reins. "Shall we assume, then, that your family and friends were unable or unwilling to aid you in your time of need?"

Axa scoffed. "My little brother was sympathetic, but ultimately powerless to help me. He's stuck too far under our mother's thumb. He's a Godlike, and it's made things... difficult, for both of them. He feels obligated to her. As for our mother, she blamed me for my own misfortunes, for 'shacking up' with a man like Vaargys in the first place. So... that sort of says it all about our relationship. My father hasn't been in the picture since I was 13, and any non-academic friends I hadn't already traded for school, I ended up trading for Vaargys. I'd made him my whole world, and he–" She stopped herself, puffed on her pipe. "I don't... really make new friends easily. Never have."

Kana laughed good-naturedly. "With all due respect, present company seems to indicate quite the contrary."

"Ha! Since becoming a Watcher with her own castle who offers to help everyone she meets solve all their problems, I do seem to be quite popular, yes," the orlan agreed with a wry smirk. "...I jest, of course. In any case, the friends I do make, I tend to keep. And cherish." She smiled at Kana earnestly, and now he averted his eyes and went ruddy in the face.

Sagani and Aloth surprised one another, simultaneously faking coughing fits to cover their derisive snorts. Kana went even redder, but still managed a sheepish smile as Axa quickly redirected back to the topic at hand.

"In any case, it was my mother who gave me the idea to relocate to the Dyrwood. She brought back the notice advertising the caravan from the marketplace, threw it at me as I lay in my little nest of quilts and despair, and told me I had better either try and do something to rebuild my life or I may as well just return my soul to the Wheel to start a new one, save it some time and trouble."

"So... in response to your fiancé sabotaging your career and your reputation in your own home community, your own mother told you to... choose between self-exile and suicide?" Aloth spoke very quietly, very carefully. When Axa nodded and shrugged, puffing nonchalantly on her pipe, he couldn't quite come up with anything to say to that.

"As harsh as it sounds," she pressed on as she rose and crossed the room to stand before the hearth, "I agreed with her. I still do. Mama grew up a slave and only finally earned her freedom by running away, so maybe she's biased, but... I was never going to be able to move on like that, lying around like I was dead already, surrounded by bad memories. I had to do something, get up and get out. And wouldn’t it be my luck, she dropped a nice, pre-packaged escape plan in my lap, just like that. Nicest thing she'd done for me in a good long while. ...So. That's what lead me to the Dyrwood."

"And then it lead you to the bîaŵac, the Engwithan ruins, the machine," Kana murmured, rubbing his chin and studying the little woman. "Perchance, did you ever pray to Wael that you might live an interesting life? Because if so, you've had your wish granted many times over!"

"It's funny," Axa sighed as she bent and tapped her pipe against the bricks of the fireplace, "you'd think I'd hold a grudge against Wael, allowing Their priest to make a fool of me like that. But in the end, I had to admit that although he betrayed my trust and wrecked my life, Vaargys hadn't actually ever violated any of Wael's tenets. ...Made me rethink the gods, a bit. Maybe he was a true servant of Wael after all, sent to guide me here for some reason. And I do still pray to Wael for guidance, on occasion."

The aumaua sat up in his chair, beaming. "Ah! Shall we go to the Hall of Revealed Mysteries tomorrow after all, then? We can ask the scriveners' opinion!"

"Gods! I spill my guts to you, and you're still thinking about going to the library?" Axa shook her head and chuckled. "You're a mystery, Kana."

"Wait, so... you were gonna marry a pale elf?" Edér mumbled into his pillow, half asleep and trying to kick his boots off. "But you're an orlan. Would that... how would that work?"

The little woman threw the sheets back on her bed, using a little more force than she'd meant to. "Another mystery, Edér," she snapped, rolling her eyes. "Mysteries abound."

The other two men winced as Sagani laid a gentle, steady hand on the orlan's shoulder. "Hey. ...Hel of a day for all of us. Let's call it a night, yeah?"

So they did.

—

#poe anthem infinitum #watcher axa #well! didn't think i'd be including that backstory in this chapter!#but that's how it shook out #next portion should be the last in ch. 9 i hope i hope i hope #story why are you so long but also somehow not descriptive enough #pillars of eternity

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lokidiabolus · 3 years

Text

Last Resort - Chapter 2

Fandom: The Maze Runner

Pairing: Thomas x Newt

Warnings: ex boyfriends, AU

Summary: Three years after breaking up with Thomas, Newt finally thought the past of hating each other was behind them, until Thomas asked him for a favour - pretend they got back together for a week while staying at his parents’ home. Because it was an absolutely dumb idea, Newt was inclined to refuse, but then found himself in the house he used to visit when he was in love and happy and the bitter reality of only pretending for people he always liked made him miserable. But it was nothing against dealing with Thomas himself for a week straight and trying not to fall back in love that hurt them both.

Or: Prompt ch. 192 with added spice. Or something. I just needed to write for a while :’)

Can be found on Ao3.

Notes: I think I never did so much rewriting like I did with this chapter. I'm still not satisfied with it, but I swear my brain just can't come up with anything else. Scrapped like 6 pages asdfjslfjslfjsdl. Now it's short :c

Anyway, guess I just wanted a bit of Thomas' insight for it. He's complicated lol. Or maybe not really, just trying to keep up. Don't we all though lol.

Oh and @izzymultifan (actually remembered)

Unbetad!

EDIT: (17. 5. 2021) I edited the ending with a lil continuation of the scene I previously deleted, because I thought it was unnecessary, but then I returned to it after few days and thought it should stay. It's not very long but I guess it's kinda important.

***

Thomas woke up disoriented, thirsty and definitely not rested enough, like when his alarm goes off on a workday and he only slept for four hours. But here was no alarm, no work, just him waking up with a flinch and realizing he wasn’t in his flat, and he wasn’t alone either.

The blond hair right in his face immediately pushed him into realization he was holding onto Newt like he was his lifeline, one hand under the shirt on his belly, other on his chest clutching the fabric, and an unmistakable morning hello tenting his pants, digging right into Newt’s backside. In retrospect there wasn’t much worse Thomas could have done to him, except maybe having a hand down his pants (which admittedly he used to do sometimes when they were together, but then again, that situation definitely didn’t scream murder like it would now).

In a sleepy confusion that hazed his just-woken-up-brain he searched the foggy memory on how this situation came to be, no matter how familiar it felt to him. Newt made himself pretty clear about sleeping together, so the sudden closeness – well, more like an absolute merge, unless he’d slip in – no, no dirty thoughts, bad Thomas, bad – didn’t make much sense.

The night came back to him embarrassingly slow – he got drunk because for some reason his dad decided to decimate his super precious whiskey, even though normally he hoarded it like a dragon his gold. He could only think of Newt being the incentive, drinking the whiskey so fast in his dad’s eyes, while Thomas downed it all to save him from barfing (Newt’s alcohol tolerance never existed in the first place, he disliked about any kind of it, and as far as Thomas remembered he got drunk only once with vodka mixed with orange juice on Aris’ wedding, because he could barely taste the vodka in it until it was too late). Then the world started spinning, Newt dragged him to his room somehow… which sounded farfetched, so maybe dad helped, he drew blank around that area honestly, probably because he stood up and all the alcohol began circulating faster. Then they talked… probably, and then Thomas fell asleep, since that’s all he could recall.

And now his hard-on was trying to get some, and he held Newt against himself with sheer ferocity of an obsessive hugger off his meds and the realization dawned on him like tons of bricks. Was he going to wake him up if he let go? Newt always woke up at the slightest noise before, there was no way of going to pee at night without getting back to the blond blinking owlishly at him, asking what happened. Was this Newt he barely knew anymore still the same? Still twitchy and light sleeper and grumpy and slow to rise when getting up?

Thomas didn’t have much choice anyway, did he. He just had to let go either way, and preferably remove his hips from Newt’s back and act like it was no biggie to be hard when in bed with his ex. He slowly untangled his hand from the front of Newt’s shirt and retreated from under the shirt as well with the other hand and managed to roll onto his back without Newt visibly stirring, which was a success. Unless he pretended to be asleep to avoid talking to Thomas about pushing into him like a horny teenager, which also worked.

Not like he hadn’t been doing that in the last month of their relationship anyway, just... ignoring the problem until it went away (a problem named Thomas) and well, ultimately it succeeded. It would work now too, and Thomas refused to poke the wasp nest this early in the morning – judging from the clock at 8:04 – and just went with the flow.

Need coffee, he thought unhappily when the headache set in. And water. Maybe some alone time in a bathroom first.

Newt didn’t stir until Thomas slinked out of the bedroom, which was a complete lie.

***

“Dad, just drop it,” Thomas repeated for fourth time when his dad couldn’t stop haggling him about his childlike alcohol tolerance the moment he appeared in the kitchen, asking for black coffee. He couldn’t tell him he drank Newt’s portions and without that argument nothing would sound plausible anyway, so he just dodged it with an increasing headache. Newt got up about half an hour later and didn’t speak a word to him – Thomas would even say he avoided his eyes several times, which meant he was absolutely awake in the morning to witness all of Thomas’ struggle to even exist around him peacefully. Which he couldn’t for years, really, so this only proved it.

It was fine. Thomas learned how to deal with it, despite taking him two years to come in terms of being hated by a person he loved since he was 17. Well, everything around the breakup took a lot from him, but he dealt with all eventually, right? He could finally look Newt in the eye without having all the incoherent anger and frustration pile up and he could talk to him fine as well unless they breached one of the thousand forbidden topics. Like them. Like family. Like love. Like sleeping. Like breathing, existing and fucking just trying to live.

Anyway. All dealt with, of course. No hard feelings.

(Lots of them.)

“You dealt with the drunkard just fine, right Newt?” his dad chattered towards the blond, patting him on his back and Newt forced a smile and a nod. Thomas saw this particular expression too often to not recognize it and huffed while sitting down at the counter with his own coffee.

He was used to being a bad guy anyway, no matter how much of the blame he genuinely deserved. They both knew he didn’t get drunk because he wanted to get wasted enough to drop unconscious on a spot and Newt would be a hypocrite to badmouth him when he was pouring all his whiskey to Thomas’ glass with thankful expression yesterday. But then again, not even he could tell Thomas’ dad about it, so they just had to have this unspoken oh yes, Thomas is a real piece of work as always.

Which sort of sucked. But Thomas couldn’t care less what his dad thought about his alcohol tolerance, it wasn’t like he threw up everywhere or broke mum’s precious bowls set (again). Not that he expected Newt to defend him anyhow, but he could at least say nooo, he was fine, he just fell asleep or something. Not that it surprised him he didn’t, but…

“He used to drink majority of guys from my work under the table and now look at him,” his dad delivered his fifth Thomas can’t drink for shit jab. He sure loved to milk that. “At least he has you to look after him, huh.”

Thomas stared at Newt’s back with mild annoyance the more the blond refused to elaborate on anything, just smiling at his dad while making himself a cup of coffee, and then Thomas’s eyes suddenly fell on the nape of Newt’s neck with a vicious, red mark near the hairline, and his whole body seized up like he got paralyzed.

A hickey? Since when? From who? What? Wait, was Newt already dating somebody else?

Saying already like three years were short amount of time… Thomas mentally scolded himself and his body raised up on its own volition, like being pulled in by some invisible force towards the blond. He had no clue if it were a twisted need for revenge or vindication or just him being unable to come in terms of not being told or warned, or maybe all of it together, he just couldn’t stop and plastered himself all over Newt’s back, trapping him between his body and the counter, circling his thin waist like a vine (he got thinner for sure).

“Of course I have you, don’t I,” he purred into Newt’s ear, loud enough for his dad to hear perfectly, and felt how Newt’s whole body froze, his hand mid-stir of the coffee. Thomas could see how his Adam’s apple bobbed when he gulped. “Looking after me when I get hammered into unconsciousness.”

“Yeah.” Newt’s voice sounded small, and Thomas wanted to bite down at that red, angry place on his nape like an animal. His dad probably wouldn’t appreciate it, but his ego sure would. He let his hands slide lower, to Newt’s hips, grabbing a handful, and the habitual movement made him restless. He did it zillion times during the time they were together. He did less, he did more, naked, clothed, lying, standing up, in whatever situation, touching Newt was his privilege.

And some fucking horny prick just took it?

Just marked his boyfriend – ex-boyfriend, Thomas, ex-boyfriend for three years, pull yourself together, you’re not 17 anymore – like a property and he didn’t even fucking notice?

Newt’s breath hitched and the spoon he was holding dropped into the coffee, splashing the black liquid around it, dribbling down the drawers under, making the blond curse under his breath.

“Sorry,” he immediately said towards Thomas’ dad who was handing him a cloth to wipe it with, and started squirming. “Thomas, leggo. Can’t reach.”

“Don’t wanna,” Thomas refused, squeezing Newt even tighter. “I’m hangover and miserable and you’re supposed to take care of me.”

Thomas’ dad snorted but took the hint and retreated while calling at his wife the boys are being rowdy again, Anna! And the kitchen fell back into silence, except of their breathing, with Thomas plastered against Newt’s back like he wanted to topple him over (he sort of did).

“Do you enjoy being a bloody prick?” Newt finally broke the spell, pawing at Thomas’ hands to get them off, his voice an angry whisper. “What’s your deal, for fuck’s sake!”

“Hangover,” Thomas huffed, not letting go and to be completely honest, Newt wasn’t really trying as much, just slapping his hands half-heartedly. “Could’ve at least said I didn’t give you any trouble, I covered for you the whole night.”

“You gave me loads of it!” Newt started wiggling, and Thomas had to fight the urge to just bite down, mark any piece of skin available, to make the restlessness go away. “You were heavy as fuck, I had to carry you all the way to your room!”

“Yeah, and?” Thomas grabbed him lower, and Newt pinched his hand in revenge, which finally made him let go with sharp breath.

“Fuck you,” the blond barked at him with fiery eyes. “I don’t know what you are trying to prove but groping me is not on the bloody table, get it?!”

“Mhm,” Thomas rubbed the place Newt pinched him at. “Sure. No fun allowed, got it.”

“Fuck off!”

Thomas hated how Newt turned away and the hickey was so visible it made his insides churn. He used to talk about his problems a lot these past few years, so he could finally let go of whatever was holding him in place, unable to forget, and he thought he reached that point, that he was free.

Looking at Newt marked by another man… no. He was not. Still stuck, still the same.

Still angry and miserable.

Still… there.

***

The fact Newt refused to talk to him completely was an understatement. Thomas blamed his unsteady approach on the alcohol, because what else he could blame it on – his own feelings? He sodealt with those already, there was nothing that would make him see red.

Except of a hickey on his ex-boyfriend’s neck, that would do it. Apparently.

But still – it was the hangover that made him stupid, right. If he’d be completely sober and not aching anywhere and his mind clear, he would just… shrug at it. It was Newt’s business who he slept with or not, or who he let bite his nape like a dog (some young fucking idiot who thought hickeys are still sexy? Stupid shit).

Not Thomas’. Not anymore.

The more he tried to push it away from his mind, the more his mind pushed back, just pointing it out loudly every time he glanced towards the blond sitting on the couch in the living room, bundled in a fluffy blanket, fiddling with his phone.

He was fiddling with his phone a lot actually. Texting somebody?

The guy who left the mark?

Thomas felt the irrational anger seep into his consciousness again and he forced it back down with a frown. He knew asking Newt to help him to get his parents off his back wasn’t exactly a great idea (asking ex to be your bf again for a show just screamed trouble), but at the same time asking anybody else just felt… wrong.

Thomas had to admit he’d be able to go along with this only with Minho, probably. Because Minho was a born actor, he’d be able to breeze though this with ease and Thomas’ parents would like him for sure, because, well, everybody liked Minho, honestly.

Asking Teresa or Brenda was just… desperate. Because other than them it would be Newt and getting back together with Newt… well. Thomas could tell from the moment he saw him getting into his car in front of Newt’s workplace it was going to be tough for both of them.

Not much of a surprise so far climbing Mt. Everest would be easier than keeping his chaotic feelings under control.

“You need some fresh air,” his vision of Newt got obstructed by his mum in a frilly apron she wore unironically and he looked up to her with half-lidded eyes.

“I think I need chicken soup, actually,” he offered in response, because dragging himself through the snow outside now sounded like a death penalty.

“Air first,” she insisted, adamant, and turned towards Newt like an executioner. “Right, Newt? A walk would do him good.”

Newt looked at Thomas and Thomas just knew. He was doomed. Newt was going to betray him like Scar did with Mufasa and he’d enjoy it, he could see the glint in his eyes, just shining there, spelling revenge in big, neon letters.

Please, he mouthed at the blond in desperation and Newt tilted his head to the side and then his mouth curled up.

“Sure, that’s a great idea, Anna,” he signed the death certificate without an ounce of shame and relished in it.

Fuck you, Thomas mouthed again, and Newt sent him a condescending smile. Fuck him especially.

***

“You’re unusually quiet,” his mum casually pointed out like she didn’t just drag him out to cold ass weather while holding a knife (butter one, but that’s what made it scarier), despite his very vocal (or vocal sort of, too loud and his brain wanted out of his skull) protests.

“Hungover,” he reminded her bitterly. The snow under their feet crunched sharply and the noise was tearing his brain to pieces, like walking on a broken glass and he had no idea how much longer he’d be able to act like it wasn’t killing him.

“Well, it was nice of you to cover for him,” Anna shrugged like she didn’t just blew their cover with a killer one liner and Thomas probably shouldn’t have been as surprised. “Don’t think I’ve ever seen him drink.”

“That’s cuz he can’t drink for shit,” he mumbled with a frown. “Did dad notice?”

“No,” she shook her head. “He was too busy boasting about the partnership. It’s been some time since I’ve seen him so happy, you know how he hoards the whiskey otherwise.”

“Yeah, cheapskate,” Thomas snorted, and the noise sliced his brain painfully, like an instant karma.

“Think he was happy about Newt being back too,” she hit the nail on the head a bit too close to home and Thomas hated how his stomach lurched at it. “Well, you know him.”

“Sure is happy for not getting any grandkids,” he just grumbled and Anna patted him on his back.

“We still have Hannah,” she reminded him sweetly. “Maybe one day she’ll feel like having kids and force you to babysit for her two times a week.”

“Me? You’re going to be the grandparents, it’s your obligation to babysit!” The idea of taking care of Hannah’s kids made him scared for life, and they didn’t even exist yet.

“Pretty sure Newt wouldn’t mind,” she chirped happily, and Thomas loathed how right she probably was. Newt never really showed any kind of real interest in having kids or anything, but he never minded babysit for his own sister, and generally all the kids liked him.

Not that thinking about that had any merit anyway, since they split up with a point of no return. Maybe Newt already planned kids with the new person who left the distasteful hickey on his nape, or the person who he kept texting, and the more Thomas thought about it, the more his chest burned.

“Cherish him a bit more, would you,” she poked his arm. “Don’t think I didn’t notice you have some beef between you. Had an argument before coming here?”

Why the fuck is she so perceptive?

“A bit,” he answered quietly. “No biggie.”

“Set things right,” she plainly ordered him like he was ten again and had do her bidding. “I don’t want another sad Christmas.”

There isn’t going to be any Christmas for us, he wanted to tell her, but kept his mouth shut. At this rate, there wasn’t going to be anything for them, at all.

I really need some sleep.

***

Not very often did the morning come so peacefully, like a gentle spring washing over tired soul, leaving it invigorated. Thomas basked in the pleasantness of it, a quiet, warm and relaxed moment where he slowly woke up from a dream into reality still welcoming and soft like he never left the fantasy realm.

He took a deep breath, stretching, slowly coming to realize of contours of another body pressed into him, and under his hands and around his legs and under his chin. The soft blond hair came to view when he opened his eyes, with Newt draped around him needily, and his heart melted.

The first night in their flat. Their home. A place that only belonged to them, these walls and floors, and small kitchen and big windows, for them together. It came true, finally, inevitably, for Thomas to have Newt all for himself, to share his mornings, his evenings, his life with him. Nothing else could make him happier.

“You already up?” came a sleepy rumble from Newt’s chest, the hands holding Thomas’ waist slowly moved up, to his back, pushing them even closer together.

“Just woke up,” Thomas kissed the top of the blond strands, his own hands traveling over Newt’s back, right onto his butt, kneading it.

“Mmmm.” Approving sound doubled his endeavour and then Newt was slowly grinding to him, lazily, his lips stretched in a smile, reaching to pamper Thomas’ neck with small kisses. “This sure is nice, huh.”

“Love it,” Thomas agreed with the sentiment while grabbing Newt’s thigh and hiking it up over his hip. The blond softly moaned at the contact and Thomas pushed more into it, completely awake and needy and allowed. There was nobody that could hear them, scold them or gasp in shock like a puritan at them making out – just them, two lovers in their home, free to make love any time they wanted.

And Thomas wanted too much.

***

He never stopped wanting.

He woke to his room bathing in shadows, with the blanket twisted between his legs, his headache still present, even though in weaker state than in the morning, and his body wasn’t any less sluggish. The walk with his mum didn’t help him much, just added to his misery with freezing cold and nagging reality he couldn’t play this game any longer, which made him feel empty and unhappy.

He didn’t feel this unhappy in a while, it usually only came back when he heard of Newt about a year after the breakup. Every time his ex came back to his life, even when somebody only mentioned him in a passing conversation, Thomas’ chest set off that painful pang in it, like a trigger just waiting to be pressed, and he fell back into hollow kind of depression.

He got rid of it, somehow. He built walls around himself, he locked all of his twisted personality traits and pushiness and hateful behaviour away, he spent years searching for more he could fix, for all that made Newt unhappy with him, what made him leave Thomas after seven years without really talking about it.

He thought he managed to become a better person. He believed he could change the way he acted. He hoped if he ever talked to Newt again, at any point of their lives, he would be at least able to show him he wasn’t that ungrateful, lousy boyfriend anymore, that they could at least be friends. Somehow. Just talk normally. Just… exist in the same room without… Newt making that anguished face, like it hurt him still.

Thomas tried. But failed. Maybe it was just recurring theme of his life – to touch something wonderful, to taste true happiness, just to fuck it all up and lose it.

Maybe he was just obsessive. Suffocating.

Maybe making mistakes were rooted too deep in him to get rid of.

Maybe… it was simply impossible.

***

Newt was playing games with Hannah in the living room when Thomas came back down. Hannah made fun of him for sleeping all day like an old guy and his mum said something about hoping he didn’t catch a cold and gave him a bowl of chicken soup.

The strange, unattached feeling stayed with him since he woke up, and only doubled when he saw Newt’s neck marked by some fucker on display. His stomach churned at the implication there was this unknown guy waiting for Newt to come back home, who kept impatiently sending him texts that made Newt frown and smile in turns, like he just slowly sunk back into the problem they never resolved. Thomas felt disgusted with himself, and angry, and, when it came to it, immensely tired.

“Oh, you have the whole week free?” his mum asked suddenly, breaking Thomas’ bubble of trying to eat the soup like a mental case of lobotomy, and he realized there had been a conversation going in meantime and he didn’t catch any of it. Newt wasn’t playing the game anymore, though Hannah still furiously pressed buttons on her controller, and instead of it sat on the couch, turned towards Thomas’ mum at the table.

“Yeah, thought getting out of the city might do me good,” he answered her with a soft smile and the idea of another week like this sent Thomas into desperate mode. Even though it was him who forced Newt to take whole week off, because… he only had bad ideas, obviously.

“But there’s bit of a rush now, right?” he entered the conversation impulsively and Newt glanced at him with a raised eyebrow. “At work. Christmas and all that being close.”

“Yeah, it’s… a bit hectic,” the blond admitted, making Thomas’ mum go aww. “There’s lots of people taking vacations they didn’t spend yet, so we usually work crunch time.”

“Yeah, kind of same,” Thomas added. It wasn’t really a lie. But not the truth either. “And I know I said a week, but I’ve got some texts from work already, thought of going back tomorrow instead.”

Newt stared at him with an evident confusion, but Thomas knew at this rate they were going to crash and burn again if they stayed, and he didn’t want that. He couldn’t even trust himself to keep it civil when his blood boiled like in a bull taunted with red flag.

Except the red flag was an unknown nobody on the other side of the line of Newt’s phone.

And bed.

“Uh,” came from the blond. “No, wait. What? You…”

“We can visit again during Christmas,” Thomas offered a big fat lie, he almost bit his tongue at it. Christmas were a taboo, he knew mentioning it were already risky, but it gave him an out with his mum, so that worked at least. “When it’s calmer.”

“When is what calmer?” Newt still stared, Thomas said almost disbelieving, and he just prayed for him to play along and not act like he knew nothing about it.

“Work,” he answered stiffly. Too stiffly, he realized, since Newt’s eyes narrowed.

“Uh oh,” he heard Hannah interject, which meant he already failed in the mission to make this believable. Fuck.

“I need a smoke,” the blond announced instead of reacting and stood up sharply. Then shot Thomas a badly masked glare. “Keep me company?”

He wanted to say no but couldn’t when his whole family watched them like during tennis match. So he just nodded and followed Newt outside of the house while feeling like slapping himself.

***

“Care to explain or am I supposed to guess.”

The cigarette was lit, its fiery tip shone bright in the darkness of the porch once the automatic light shut itself because they weren’t moving like they rooted in the wooden floor. Newt was wearing his coat and Thomas only stood there in the long-sleeved shirt, which in retrospect was probably a mistake.

“I did explain,” Thomas said. “Just thought about work-,”

“No, you didn’t,” Newt stopped him immediately while crossing one of his arms on his chest while other held the cigarette like a weapon. “You said a week, so I took a week off. I’m not bloody leaving now. It’s my vacation.”

“I also said three days would probably be enough,” Thomas asserted. “And they are. I thought you’d appreciate it.”

“Why?” the blond demanded. “It’s not like I suffer here. I like this place. What’s your problem?”

That kind of question had no easy answer and Thomas held Newt’s eyes only for few seconds, before looking away.

“Am I the problem?” came another question, even sharper. “You just can’t stand me anymore, so you want to leave?”

“You know that’s bullshit,” Thomas scoffed. “Since when did I ever-,”

“No, I don’t know!” Newt interrupted him with raised voice and Thomas flinched. “I don’t bloody know anything about you anymore! You brought me here and expected what? War? Did you want us to fail?”

“Why would I want us to fail?” Thomas’ eyes widened in a shock. “What kind of fucked up logic would that be?!”

“I don’t know!” Newt barked. The cigarette he was holding was slowly fading away, the ash falling everywhere how he moved his hand. “But something’s up since this morning, so obviously you’re lying about work and I want to know why!”

Well, finding out his ex-boyfriend had a lover, or a sex friend or whatever the other person was definitely served as a wake-up call. Thomas couldn’t overlook it – he thought he’d be fine with anything, it had been years, but one fucking hickey and some fleeting texts and he just had the rising urge to tear the walls he built down and get angry and make Newt inevitably miserable, which he despised.

He fucking loathed it. And himself. And everything around him.

“Why did you even agree to come here?” he couldn’t help but demand. “Why did you even bother playing this stupid game when you have somebody home? You trying to make him jealous or it’s just your thing?”

Accusing – stupid Thomas, fucking idiot, just talk normally, what’s wrong with you – as always.

“What?” Newt’s eyes shot up, wide in honest surprise. His cheeks were red from the cold, or maybe embarrassment, Thomas didn’t know. “What are you talking about?”

“About that hickey on your neck?” Thomas pointed towards the incriminated spot and Newt’s whole body went rigid.

“A hickey…?” Newt’s free hand was touching the place now, his voice shocked. “You… ugh.”

“Look, it’s not my business, clearly,” Thomas rubbed his eyes tiredly, desperately trying to make an excuse for his own consciousness why he couldn’t look at Newt. “But obviously it’s causing you trouble with him, so. As I said. Three days are fine, we can leave now. Go back home. Forget about this.”

And forget about me trying to corner you, and me getting hard in the bed with you this morning, and me sounding jealous and lame, and me… just for being me.

“Are you fucking with me?” Newt’s voice sounded disbelieving. “Are you bloody serious right now? A hickey from some random guy appeared over night here? That’s what you’re saying?”

Overnight…?

“Overnight?” he asked a little dumbly, which forced him to look Newt in the eyes, where he saw hell unleashed. It made his throat squeeze almost hard enough to suffocate him.

“You think I just popped back home for a quickie, then back to your bed in the morning like a bloody Cinderella?” the blond seethed, the cigarette in his hand morphing into a protentional weapon of choice. “Where did that even came for, for fuck’s sake? You’d been seeing me for two days, never noticed anything, and then suddenly your Esmeralda syndrome got cured or what?”

“But-,”

“You bloody drunk fucker,” Newt took a step towards him and Thomas found himself hitting the entrance door with his back, when he automatically tried to back out. “Should have known your bird brain won’t remember anything.”

The realization hit Thomas like tons of bricks right in his face, able to cause heavy concussion if it were real.

“I did this?!”

“No, the bloody sucker behind you, who the fuck do you think?!” Newt’s voice was harsh, but Thomas could only hear the bare fact he made a hickey of size of Texas on his ex-boyfriend’s nape while spending the next day being jealous… of himself.

“What the fuck,” he breathed out with an ugly relief flooding his veins, which was all sorts of wrong. Being relieved over attacking his ex at night definitely did not count as a good point in anybody’s book. “What the fuck.”

“Calmer now?” Newt sighed in exasperation and Thomas couldn’t say he was. It just opened door to another set of bad he had to deal with.

“I attacked you when drunk?” he asked quietly, and Newt blinked in surprise.

“Attacked?” he repeated and then barked out a laugh. “No, you really didn’t. You were drunk out of your mind, for fuck’s sake.”

“I see.”

“Didn’t think it left anything,” the blond sighed, rubbing the back of his neck as if in memory, which was kind of hot – no Thomas, it was not hot, but embarrassing, shut up -. “I mean you just munched on me a little, then fell back asleep. No harm done.”

“You made a fuss about us sleeping in one bed but it’s no biggie when I leave a hickey?” Thomas couldn’t help but laugh a little and Newt’s face showed signs of hesitation.

“Look…” he tried after a moment, the cigarette in his hand nearly gone. “I… don’t know, you were just sleeping while holding me, it doesn’t mean anything-,”

“And that’s fine with you?” It was Thomas’ turn to interrupt him, and Newt looked a little lost for a moment.

“I suppose that’s fine with me, yeah,” he admitted slowly.

Thomas looked at his shoes, taking in a deep breath. He couldn’t deny the knot forming in his belly over the day already started easing off, for purely selfish reasons he had, but at the same time his head became even a bigger mess than before.

“So what does it mean?” he asked after a while. “I’m trying to do the right thing here, I thought… you’d rather leave than stay with me longer, after today, but…”

“I want to stay,” Newt answered immediately. “Unless you really don’t want me here. Then no, of course. I had the same problem the first day, feeling all kinds of weird and jumpy. I guess I just sort of dealt with it. Stepped out of my comfort zone and all that.”

“Sorry you had to.”

It wasn’t like Thomas wanted Newt to change anyhow by doing this favour for him. But he’d also be a hypocrite if he didn’t admit he wished Newt to feel good here. With him. Selfishly, hopelessly. Like before, like they were okay. Like they still… liked each other. At least a little.

He knew that kind of hope was self-destructive and harmful, but he didn’t stop loving this man three years ago, after going through an immensely rough patch, so he wouldn’t stop loving him now for no reason either.

“No need to be sorry,” Newt interrupted his thoughts with much softer tone than Thomas expected. “I mean even despite it’s you, you didn’t really do anything bad yet.”

“Wow,” Thomas snorted. “Way to ruin the mood, boyfriend.”

“I try,” Newt grinned, and it seemed like the tense mood dissipated and they both relaxed enough to breathe easier. Thomas possibly wouldn’t even notice he had been so strung up until now, if the huge boulder of irrational fear of fucking up didn’t fall off his shoulders with a bang.

“And just for the record,” Newt added while finally inhaling the last puff from the already burned-out cigarette before stubbing it out in the ashtray. “I noticed you digging into me in the morning.”

“Of course you did…” Thomas banged the back of his head against door in utter shame. “Because universe hates me, and you had to fucking wake up.”

“Yeah, well,” Newt let out a small shrug. “I got hard at night, if it makes you feel any better. Let’s call it even.”

“What.”

“Had a real nice dream,” the blond casually announced like he was ordering pie with no filling and Thomas was a stupefied cashier at Costa Cafe. “Woke up with you being handsy with me. Tried to scramble away, cue for you to make the hickey and fall back asleep.”

“Uh.”

“1:1, right?” The sly smile Newt’s mouth produced did things to Thomas’ underbelly and before he even caught himself, he automatically reached out and grabbed Newt’s side.

Fuck.

“Pretty lousy score,” he just said – bad Thomas, stop making a pass at your ex -, “That’s no match whatsoever.”

Newt glanced at his hand resting on his waist and then back to Thomas with a thoughtful hum.

“I’m not that good at sports,” he just said, looking back into Thomas’ eyes. “But you might be onto something.”

Thomas took a deep breath and risked the second hand grabbing other side of Newt’s waist, pulling him closer. The layers of clothing made him dissatisfied, no matter how cold it was and how his skin already felt like ice, he just wanted to get under the coat and the sweater and the shirt and make Newt react somehow. The blond just silently watched him, let him do whatever he wanted, and somehow it felt like a test and Thomas was scared of failing it.

“That’s it?” Newt broke the tense silence around them when Thomas just stood there, holding him.

“Thinking,” the brunet mumbled with a frown.

“About?”

“How to touch you without it being classified as groping,” he moved his hands a little lower as an experiment, getting no reaction. “Since it’s off the table.”

“Pfff.”

He hesitated, then gingerly let go of one side and reached for the zipper lodged under Newt’s chin, keeping the coat closed like a fortress. His hand barely cooperated with how frozen it was, but Newt still didn’t stop him and that encouraged him unfairly.

“Newt.”

“Yeah?” the blond’s voice was quiet and close to his face.

“What’s with all the texting?” He kept holding the zippier between his fingers like he couldn’t decide, and Newt made a soft huh? noise in the back of his throat.

“You were on your phone the whole day,” Thomas lowered his voice to almost a whisper. “Is there somebody…?”

A sigh. Thomas let go of the zipper.

“That’s Alby,” came a reply and if Thomas wasn’t already propped against the door, he’d take a step back. There was nowhere to run now, so he just let go of the blond completely, nodding.

“He’s my partner,” another string of words Thomas comprehended but wished he didn’t. “A bit demanding one.”

“Sounds like it,” he just commented, staring at his feet until Newt’s shoes came into view as well when he stepped closer.

Seriously testing me. That’s-

“A bit cruel,” he breathed out with a puff of white smoke and Newt pushed further and pressed his mouth against Thomas’. His cold lips lingered for a moment before parting, their breaths mingling, and Thomas’ heart fought really hard to get out of his chest and run away. The proximity was non-existent, Newt stood so close their chests were touching, and his eyes were so dark, and pupils blown wide Thomas got easily lost in them.

He always did. Nothing had changed.

“You look cold,” Newt whispered to his lips, hovering so close their mouths gently touched when they took a breath.

“Freezing,” Thomas answered in daze, holding back only by a miracle. He wanted to reach out and pull the blond man flush against him, to grind into him, to kiss him so deep his toes would curl, and he’d buck up, he just wanted so much it made him suffer.

“Alby’s my colleague,” Newt dropped quietly. “Funnily… you weren’t wrong about work being in a rush now. He’s struggling a little. Wanted to know my opinion.”

A colleague. And nothing else?

“Nothing else,” Newt answered like he could read his mind and then sagged against Thomas’ body like the energy just left him, resting his head on Thomas’ shoulder.

“I thought I can handle being this close to you,” he heard him mumbling into his shirt. “But the more I am, the less I can fight it.”

“I thought I can handle you dating somebody else,” Thomas added to it while letting his head fall back against the door with a dull thud. “But obviously not. It’s scary. I don’t want to fuck it up again.”

“Yeah,” Newt agreed with him. “Me neither.”

He wasn’t sure if this had been some sort of consensus they reached, or just a fling that happened because they were both lonely, but Thomas didn’t want to let go – even though he should have, logically, to protect them both. The pain they caused to each other three years ago was still there and festering under their skins, but the more Newt was pressed into him, breathing softly, the more Thomas noticed his reason slowly creeped away, like a thief in the night disappearing with loot.

But he wanted. For fuck’s sake how he wanted to just hold him close and promise him love and eternal happiness, and the scary part was he couldn’t promise shit. His love was real, but not unconditional, happiness was fleeting and simply relying on both of them and the rest of the world deciding whatever to fuck them up or not.

But…

“I give up,” he mumbled, weary to the bone. At Newt’s soft hm? he just sighed. “It’s fucking cold.”

The blond barked out a laugh, but nodded and let go of him, immediately taking all the warmth away.

“Then shall we assure them we’re not breaking up again?” he nodded towards the door and without waiting for Thomas’ reply he already reached for the handle. “Or not leaving tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” the brunet conceded. “Hannah’s going to be milking this for the rest of the week…”

“Serves you right,” Newt laughed quietly while opening the door and Thomas kept the answer to himself.

We’re not breaking up again rang in his head like a bell, deafening his reason even further. Newt didn’t protest when he reached for his hand on their way inside, and he wondered if his heart was ready for another trial.

He ignored the uncertainty and took a leap of faith.

#newtmas #tmr #the last resort series #the maze runner #izzymultifan #edit 17. 5. 2021

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