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justalittlebluetiefling · 2 years

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Who asked me for almost 18.5k words on Steve and Nancy from Stranger things? No one? Just me? That’s fine. This was how I wanted to spend my time the last two weeks anyway.

I’m not great at introductions. I’ll just start this off with a bold thesis statement: Nancy and Steve have been intended as an endgame couple since season two. “Erin,” you might be saying, “season two is a stretch. They broke up so she could be with someone else,” while you not-so-secretly think that I’m losing it. To which I would point out that, yes, Jonathan and Nancy were one hundred percent intended to be the endgame couple at first. However, things shifted when they decided to keep Steve alive and give him his own character arc and development. They were turning Steve into someone that could be a good partner for Nancy and it doesn’t make a lot of narrative sense for them not to come back to each other in the end.

I’m getting away from myself. My point is that doing an immediate rewatch of the entire series after season four came out, I could see the shift that I hadn’t noticed before, so I want to talk about it by dissecting almost all of their interactions in every season with so many screenshots, because that’s just the kind of person I am.

Disclaimer: I just like picking apart narratives for fun. If you disagree/don’t ship it/hate me for writing this, that’s fun for you, but if you don’t have something constructive to add, let it die. There will be some talk about Jonathan and Nancy’s relationship in here as well, because it’s important to the narrative, but all the talk will be serving the thesis statement above. (I’ll also probably repeat points a few times because this is long and I lose track of things like that. And this is BARELY proofread by me, so I’m sorry.)

Season One

1x1

We get a few things from this episode.

Nancy is into Steve, but trying not to get her hopes up.

Our first glimpse into the Wheeler marriage. They are very obviously nowhere close to being on the same page.

It really is fun to go back and see Nancy with a crush. Just a girl with a crush on the popular boy and she’s really really trying to be cool about it. I mean, saying, “He likes me, but not like that,” while she can’t not smile the entire time?

We know Nancy is trying not to get her hopes up, so it’s nice that she has a friend here who knows her worth.

And this also begs the question… how much has Barb been present for their interactions? Not at all at this point, right? That’s not an answer we’re going to get, but she seems pretty insistent that Nancy is downplaying things.

Which, okay, we shift over into the bathroom where Steve and Nancy are making out and he’s doing dumb things like smiling into the kiss and trying to make plans to hang out more. Make out more, under the guise of studying.

The big thing about Steve here is that we don’t know much about him and his motives at this point. It would be really easy to write him off as what he was intended to be in the original script. But you can see it here. The way he doesn’t know what to do with someone like Nancy. How she might be different from other girls he’s pursued and he’s a confident guy, but he can tell he’s in a little over his head.

There’s also a greater conversation to be had about Steve and how much he needs physical touch as comfort, but I’m not ready to dive into that yet (maybe not in this essay at all), so I’m going to put this here. Physical touch: 1

Again, like I said above, it would be easy to write him off, right? He helps her study and he does try to push things a little further than she wants. But he listens when she tells him to stop and they go back to studying. This is something that I’m going to bring up again, but here’s why this is important. What we’re seeing here is that Nancy is the one who is setting the pace of this relationship. Whether or not it’s a pace he’s happy with, he’s sticking around, because she is what he wants. And this matters to Nancy. She sees him respecting the boundaries she’s setting.

It’s a little hint for us, the viewers, too. Something important about his personality to file away for later. This way he pushes followed by the rapid (if reluctant, in this case) pivot. And it’s important that we see Nancy clocking this. Taking in the way that he is different from the persona he uses on a daily basis. Now, in the future, we know that he’s a sad, vulnerable guy who is putting on a show, but no one at school knows that. Still, it’s something he can be for a moment around Nancy, because what’s that thing they said about Steve and Nancy? How she listens to him in a way no one else has at this point and it makes him feel more comfortable revealing this other side of himself?

I don’t know. I’ll talk about this more later, because Steve really is a rollercoaster this season.

1x2

So, their next scene is kind of interesting. Barb is quizzing Nancy in the hall and Steve steals the flashcards and both Steve and Nancy don’t notice Tommy messing with Barb’s ear really quick? But there’s something about how Nancy is Steve’s primary focus. Barb is more of an accessory to her than an individual at this point in Steve’s mind.

But, and I’m just going to dive into season 3 knowledge really quick, we know that the school’s perception of Nancy (per Robin) is that she’s “such a priss.” She and Barb aren’t cool by any means. And Tommy’s being a dick to be a dick. In contrast with Steve here, who is kind of being a dick to get attention. Anyway, it’s a whole thing with him tolerating Barb because he likes Nancy, and then there’s the other layer where Tommy and Carol are tolerating Nancy, because they like Steve. But that tolerance doesn’t extend to Barb. Hell, it barely extends to Nancy. This is the first time we see them, right? And it’s a horrible introduction. They listen to Steve, but they don’t really care how much he likes this girl. They laugh at her and she knows they’re laughing at her and I mean, honestly, this is kind of another thing about him, right? His friends don’t like her. She’s not one of the popular girls. But he doesn’t flinch about pursuing her. It’s a whole thing I don’t know how to get into, especially when he later tells Robin that Tommy H would have laughed at him for going after a girl like her in school and he hated veering away from what was expected of him. When it seems like, at least here, his pursuing Nancy isn’t exactly “cool” either.

Okay, back on track. We also get one of our only pieces of insight into his family life. His dad is out of town and his mom went with him, because she doesn’t trust him. It’s this line he’s made into a throwaway comment, because the real focus here is he wants Nancy to come over to his unsupervised house, right? I mostly want to point this out, because I’m going to say something about my thesis statement. At this point, this is actually still Nancy and Jonathan’s story and this moment here is showing Steve seeing Nancy’s distress and trying to push immediately through to the fix. This is simplifying what he does a bit, but it’s behavior we’re seeing now for a reason (and behavior we’ll see again next season).

Nancy’s saved from answering when Jonathan shows up, putting up posters and Tommy and Carol start making fun of him from a distance. We do at least see Steve telling Tommy to shut up when he jokes about Jonathan killing his brother. It’s hard to tell if that’s for Nancy’s benefit or not. He’s clearly annoyed when she goes to talk to Jonathan. (And this, right on the tail of him revealing that his dad very obviously has been unfaithful to his mom.) I’m inclined to think it wasn’t for Nancy’s benefit, but I’m feeling generous as I’m writing this.

And we’re hopping in the timeline a bit, but let’s finish talking about Steve here for a sec. Based on the way Steve opens the door, I would assume that he knows Barb is coming, but he doesn’t look bothered in the slightest. In fact, he is just so happy that Nancy’s here that nothing else matters. I mean, look at these faces. Look how excited they are to spend time together in a house without adult supervision.

Which is a perfect segue back into Nancy herself. It’s still just fun seeing her act like a stereotypical teenager with stereotypical teenager worries for a minute. And in stereotypical teenager fashion, she is nervous to go to this “party” without a safety net, no matter how excited she is to hang out with Steve. And she’s so excited! Both Nancy and Barb both know what’s going to happen. Or what Nancy wants to happen.

Nancy is trying to pretend it’s not about that for her, but she’s already made up her mind. Barb knows her friend well enough to know what’s going on. She doesn’t feel like she belongs here, but she’s here because she’s a good friend.

This is about Steve and Nancy though, so I don’t need to dig too much into Barb here. I also can’t even say that we’ve all been in this situation, but it feels like it’s relatable. Like a lot of people have possibly been either the Nancy or the Barb (or both) at some point in their lives. That intoxicating feeling of being into someone new, someone who you really like. Or sitting off to the side, being the chaperone your friend requested, with no actual desire to be there.

Honestly, Nancy is trying to remember herself here. She tries to include Barb and it backfires. And Steve tries, because Nancy tries, and he wants Nancy to stay. But he’s also done this thing where he’s dialed down the excitement. His cool guy façade is back. He’s showing off and they’re teasing each other. We get to have our first glimpse of fearless Nancy and she looks so pleased with herself.

There is a task and she is going to prove she can do it.

The thing is, circling back to the chaperone who doesn’t want to be there is that… well, Barb doesn’t want to be there. She’s annoyed at Nancy. Annoyed at the whole situation, really. Steve directs her to the bathroom when she hurts herself. We see a shot (through Jonathan’s camera) of Nancy staring back at the house. We see another shot of Steve, closer to the house, staring in the direction Barb went. Possibly a little out of actual concern. More likely, though, he’s worried that if Barb needs to leave, Nancy will go, too.

But then there’s Tommy and Carol, who distract them from what’s serious. They shift the mood.

And it’s time to bump up this count here. Physical Touch: 2

Really, I could count the stuff in the pool, but that was different.

This is Steve, reaching out to rub Nancy’s shoulder and ask if she’s all right. They’re smiling at each other and just adorable as heck in general and enamored with each other.

I said I wasn’t going to dig too much into the Barb stuff, but I have to. I’ll dig more into the results later, but for now, here’s where we’re at. Nancy wants to stay.

And this is a version of Nancy that Barb doesn’t recognize. I don’t know. There are a lot of layers to this. I know we’re meant to see this as Nancy acting in a way that’s out of her character here, because her best friend is telling her that this isn’t her. BUT. The things we know about Nancy now don’t line up with that interpretation.

This all brings me back to my point in the very brief introduction. How Jonathan and Nancy are meant to be the endgame couple right now. There is actually a parallel to this moment later this season that will point that out in more detail. Really, it can be explained away by growth in general. People grow and change and this may be out of Nancy’s character now but enough of her is recognizable here that I’m starting to talk in circles.

Let me get back on track. Nancy knows what she wants to do. She’s made up her mind. She tries to send Barb home, but Barb decides not to go, because she doesn’t want to abandon Nancy.

Physical touch: 3

I’m still not entirely sure where I’m going with the physical touch thing here, except it’s something Steve seems to do when he’s both offering and seeking comfort with Nancy. It may be as simple as that. And if that’s what we attribute it to, then I do think they’re both nervous here. Nancy is obviously more nervous. She’s gotten herself up here and it’s a big choice she’s making. But there’s also the Steve of it all, who has finally gotten Nancy Wheeler in his fucking bedroom and based on the way he looks at her, I’m not sure he was convinced he ever would.

And this is where I’ll come back to the other part of that point from my intro. They changed Steve. They made this a monumental moment for him, too, which is ultimately what throws a wrench into their plans for Jonathan. I mean, when she was supposed to be a notch in his belt, it would have worked. But instead, he’s soft with her. He’s worried about her feeling comfortable here, so he turns away when she asks. He turns back when she asks. He lets her set the pace and it means something when she wants to move forward.

1x3

Continuing right from the last moment, because the episode does, he checks in with her and she pushes things forward. The message here is hard to miss: Nancy abandoning her friend for Steve. They’re overlaying Barb’s death with Nancy and Steve having sex for the first time. The fucking shot of Steve gripping Nancy’s hand right next to the shot of Barb clinging to the pool ladder? Absolutely tragic.

They start forcing a disconnect between Steve and Nancy this episode. I don’t mean that in a way that it felt forced. I mean that they pile it on to make it feel worse. This was Nancy’s first time having sex and she’s justifiably feeling insecure afterward. Not only does Steve not wake up, but Barb is gone and Nancy has to walk home alone in the dark. (Season 4 Steve would never.) To top it all off, we know that Steve’s past hookups haven’t exactly been secret, so when she walks into school the next day, of course she’s going to be worried. But here’s where they put another wrench in their original plans. Steve cares that she knows that it mattered to him. He doesn’t ignore her. He comes up to say hi to her and then he picks up on her discomfort and immediately reassures her when she expresses her concerns to him. I had to make a gif for this moment, because like, come one. This isn’t the face of someone who doesn’t give a shit.

That is a relieved sigh that morphs into a fond look, because she believes him when he says he didn’t tell anyone.

For a minute, everything is okay. They’re both happy.

He kisses her in public and looks at her like this in public and it’s really just the sweetest. Nancy feels better. She’s happy. She doesn’t feel like a number.

Forgive me. I need a moment to mourn how cute and happy they are with their regular lives for a second. Not that everything would have been perfect for them if the Upside Down stuff didn’t happen and obviously they wouldn’t exist without the drama that happens the next four seasons, but damn. They’re cute and smitten and it’s all about to blow up.

Okay, I’m ready to move on.

During lunch, Nancy still hasn’t been able to find Barb and she goes to sit with Steve, Tommy, and Carol. There’s something really cute about how Steve leans into her almost as soon as she sits down next to him. And how Nancy leans into him. I’m actually really tempted to add this to the physical touch count, but it doesn’t quite meet the parameters I haven’t decided on yet.

Honestly, the other hilarious thing is that (and I know this is blocking for the cameras) Tommy and Carol, an established couple, aren’t sitting this close together when we see them through Steve and Nancy’s shoulders. And Steve and Nancy’s shoulders aren’t touching when we see the shots of Tommy and Carol, but as soon as it goes back to focus on Steve and Nancy, they’re leaning into each other again. It’s something weird that I can never unsee every time I see this scene.

Back to the whole thing. We have Steve here who is defending Nancy and telling Tommy to stop being an ass while also allowing his ego to be boosted when they’re making fun of her. Oh, but I will say this. Physical touch: 4. He goes for the reassuring thigh squeeze here, even if we can’t see it under the table. Trying to make sure she doesn’t worry about Barb. But Steve doesn’t know her the way Nancy does and Nancy knows something is wrong. You can actually see the disconnect here in real time, because they spent the entire scene glued at the shoulder

and as soon as he starts smirking over Carol and Tommy’s behavior

Nancy pulls back. Steve leans forward to eat while Nancy stays leaning back in her chair. It gives her a moment to have a long stare with Jonathan out in the hallway, of course.

Now, I’m not going to defend Steve’s behavior with Jonathan. Not exactly. It was a pretty bad reaction to have. But. Okay, fine, I guess I’m going to defend it a little bit. I do think we’re getting a glimpse of Steve as he was originally intended here. This is very much ‘bully’ behavior. However, we have some more context, which is that Steve knows Nancy is nervous people are going to judge her and Jonathan has a picture of her taking her shirt off. Not only did he take the picture, he’s fucking developing it on school property. I know the pictures are an important plot device, but dude. That’s a little fucked up.

Anyway, here’s this guy who took pictures of the girl Steve likes without her consent. The way he handled it? Yeah. Rough. Admittedly a little excessive. But the motives? I think those were ultimately good. ALSO. Okay, listen. Not that I think Steve needs defending, but he doesn’t even look like he feels good about it. The others (minus Nancy, of course) clearly enjoyed it. Steve just goes kind of blank. If this were Steve meta, I’d point out that he does this a couple other times this season – goes blank when he’s going into King Steve mode. All I’m really saying is, we know now that King Steve was an act, but there were signs and this is one of them.

We’re also at Physical Touch: 5 here. Nancy jogs down to his side and he slides his hand across her shoulders to walk back into the school with her. Again, using physical touch as an attempt at comfort. But this has still furthered their disconnect.

Nancy is worried about Barb and she doesn’t know what to do, but she does know that she can’t sit here and pretend things are normal. Steve either knows she’s distressed or needs comfort himself, because we have Physical Touch: 6.

It’s just this casual little touch and she leaves right after. Steve knows she’s lying. She’s not doing a great job at hiding it. But Tommy actually hits the nail on the head, unfortunately. “Maybe she freaked out when you went all psycho on the psycho.” And Steve says, “Oh, give me a break,” but he knows something is off and he knows part of it is something he did.

1x4 & 1x5

It’s interesting that Nancy gives Steve a chance here. She goes to him and tells him what she saw at his house, but they’re not communicating properly. He isn’t listening to her and she isn’t hearing anything like what she needs to from him. Nancy know something bad happened to Barb, but he can’t see past what his dad’s reaction is going to be to finding out about the party. Nancy leaves disappointed and finds a willing partner in Jonathan.

But it also does need to be pointed out that Jonathan isn’t doing this for Nancy. He’s doing it to find Will, which is still admirable. It’s what Nancy needs right now, anyway. Someone who is going to listen to her when everyone else is dismissing her. The point is, he has his own motives. They just happen to line up with hers for now. (And doesn’t that just describe their entire situation???)

So, yes. Jonathan is filling a void that Steve leaves open. But good news for Steve fans. When he fucks up, he knows he fucks up. He shows up to apologize and he says so many of the right things. He admits that he was a dick. He asks about Barb. But then he says the wrong thing. “Just kinda pretend everything’s normal for a few hours.”

Here’s a moment I’m going to take a wild leap into speculation. We don’t know what Steve’s home life is like, but the few things we’ve heard imply that it isn’t great. We know he’s a hopeless romantic. It seems very likely that he would have an idealized version of “normal” in his head, which I get the feeling is something he’s chasing. Someone who loves him, who he loves, who he can be vulnerable with, who will depend on him. Probably something a little bit like a romantic comedy where they walk off into the sunset together in the end.

It really can’t be an accident that we hear Steve talk about pretending things are normal shortly before we hear Nancy give her opinion on it.

Nancy: I don’t think my parents ever loved each other. Jonathan: They must’ve married for some reason. Nancy: My mom was young. My dad was older, but he had a cushy job, money, came from a good family. So, they bought a nice house at the end of the cul-de-sac and started their nuclear family. Jonathan: Screw that. Nancy: Yeah. Screw that.

And it isn’t so much her opinion on love and normalcy so much as her being kind of jaded by her parents’ relationship. It’s her talking about a normal life. What people expect to happen. And she’s seen normal. For her, normal isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. It’s a loveless marriage and losing yourself and she doesn’t want that.

I mean, if you really look at them, you can see that Nancy and Steve actually have a similar view of what normal is. Just different perspectives. Because it could be argued that Steve is in a similar situation. His parents could have a very similar story, but he still chases a very idealized version of “normal”. What his parents have, that’s not normal to him. It’s lacking.

But also, there’s this whole thing about Jonathan basically mirroring what Barb said to Nancy before she went upstairs with Steve. I saw this girl, you know, trying to be someone else. Which should probably hit harder, considering Barb’s “this isn’t you” from that night. Okay, but can I also dive into the other totally wild thing about this? The pictures Jonathan took of her were in Steve’s window. Where she and Steve were alone. It was like you were alone, or thought you were. And you know, you could just be yourself. I know they didn’t mean to imply that Nancy would be safe being vulnerable with Steve. That she would be safe letting him see the sides of her that she’s afraid to show other people. YOU KNOW. Kind of like the way that’s who she is for Steve?!

Anyway, back to the Jonathan thing. He gives her that excuse, which I do think hits for her, but she also calls him out for the picture thing. And then Jonathan gets offended and defensive, so they start arguing. He doesn’t hesitate to use the ammunition he has. Nancy Wheeler, she’s not just another suburban girl who thinks she’s rebelling by doing exactly what every other suburban girl does until that phase passes and they marry some boring one-time jock who now works sales, and they live out a perfectly boring little life at the end of a cul-de-sac. Exactly like their parents, who they thought were so depressing, but now, hey, they get it. The meaning behind this is not even a little subtle. “You’re doing the same thing as your mother,” is what he's saying. “You’re going to lose yourself in Steve the way she lost herself in your father.”

This is what hits hardest for Nancy. It’s what makes her doubt what she’s been doing.

1x6 & 1x7

Here comes some of the shared trauma. Or, it’s more trauma for Nancy, anyway. Not exactly shared at this point, when she was the one in the Upside Down being chased by that thing. It makes sense that Nancy wouldn’t want to be alone after this and of course, it’s the perfect setup for some miscommunication because Steve’s on his way to check on her and that is apparently out of character for him.

He says he could tell something was wrong with her and Carol’s response is, “So what? Like, you’re worried about her?” He tries to blow it off, but Tommy and Carol are dicks and they latch on to any signs of weakness. But the point is, he’s going out of his way and doing this thing he wouldn’t have done for any girl before her and he sees her in a compromising position and jumps to conclusions. We already know how he reacts to things like this after his whole scene with the camera earlier. But more on that later.

First, I’d like to talk about how Nancy is ready to jump right back in it. It’s something I love about her character. Trauma? That’s future Nancy’s problem.

Or, you know, present Nancy’s problem a little bit, because on top of everything else, there’s the sign. The sign hurts. We can see the tears in her eyes as she stares up at it. We can see her panic as she looks around at everyone who can see this. And then she hears the spray paint can and her entire face changes. Now, she’s fucking pissed and she’s not going to let them get away with doing this.

I also appreciate that she doesn’t do anything to disguise how hurt she is here. She walks up and she lets them see that she’s upset. And we see Steve and how mad he is, but he starts talking and it kind of falls apart. Yeah, he’s mad, but he’s also incredibly hurt. And lashing out in an incredibly passive way, actually. I actually think his behavior here is so interesting. Like, we’re watching him cling to some of the last pieces of this façade he’s built for himself, but he’s still so passive in this entire thing until Jonathan steps in. He didn’t stop Tommy from doing this. He’s arguing with Nancy, but he’s said his piece and he’s going to walk away. Then, Jonathan speaks and Steve flips. Nancy isn’t his target of choice. That is Jonathan. So he pushes and he pushes and he pushes until Jonathan snaps.

I actually hate the line from the woman at the police station. Only love makes you that crazy, sweetheart. She’s implying that Johnathan snapped in Nancy’s defense, and she doesn’t have the context, so how would she know otherwise? But we know what it was. It was Steve calling his family a bunch of screw-ups. A disgrace. So, yeah. It was love, but it was for his family. The same thing that has motivated all his other choices in this series.

Hell, we get almost immediate confirmation of this when Joyce comes to pick them up.

Joyce: You risked your life. And Nancy’s. Jonathan: I thought I could save Will.

And listen. I’m not knocking Jonathan for caring about Will more. I actually think that’s very cool and admirable, but he is reckless with her life for the sake of his family. Which, again. Cool. He cares about his family in a very intense way that I dig. But Nancy is not his priority. Not even now when they were still trying to sell them as an endgame ship.

And also, I can’t excuse Steve’s behavior, because it was shitty. But you know what? You look at him, sitting on his car and sulking and that is not the face of someone who won. Which, technically he did lose that fight, but Nancy’s been called out and he got to hit Jonathan a few times, plus Jonathan was arrested for their fight? I mean, that’s got to be a little bit of a win, right?

But no. None of that is what he cares about. I mean, talk about a drastic pivot. We have Jonathan in the police station admitting he is prioritizing his family and then we flip over to Steve who thinks he’s lost Nancy, but is still prioritizing her anyway. You never even liked her, because she’s not miserable like you two. She actually cares about other people. However long he’s been friends with Tommy and Carol and he’s throwing it away. He literally abandons them at this random convenience store to go clean up the mess he made.

1x8

While Steve’s been cleaning some shit up, Nancy and Jonathan have been busy. Hopper and Joyce are going into the Upside Down to try to find Will and Nancy wants to help. I wanna finish what we started. I want to kill it. And Jonathan is on board. He doesn’t want his mom to get hurt and the thing is, Nancy understands love through Acts of Service. We’re supposed to see Jonathan jumping on board with her plan here and appreciate it the way she does.

She and Jonathan prep. They set up their traps. They cut their hands, using their own blood as bait. And when they bandage up their hands, there is a charged moment. A moment that is interrupted by Steve. I don’t know about you, but to me, this says that Steve is always going to be in the way of their relationship.

And here’s the thing. Steve is here because he’s still trying to clean up his messes. It is important that he is here to apologize to Jonathan. He said some fucked up things and he knows it. He’s so desperate to apologize. She tries to send him away and he’s begging. No, no, no. Listen, I messed up, okay? I messed – I messed up. Okay? Really. Please. I just want to make things right. Honestly, he could have been mad or hurt that she’s here and it doesn’t even faze him.

But everything shifts for him when he sees that she’s hurt. His voice changes into a different kind of frantic and that’s when he forces himself in and gets to see what they’ve been up to. Nancy tries to force him out. I’m doing this for you. She doesn’t want to drag him into this, too. She doesn’t want anyone else to get hurt by this thing, but he gets dragged in anyway. Panicking, scared, he starts to run when Nancy tells him to run the next time.

Honestly, this kills me every time. Jonathan and Nancy stay inside to fight this thing that took people away from them and Steve is running. He’s fumbling with his keys and it takes him a second to get his door open and then he looks back at the house and the lights are flashing. I’m still baffled by people who say his redemption arc didn’t start until season two, because to me, it looks like it was well underway by this point. This entire season was the start of it or he wouldn’t have run back into the house even though he was terrified out of his mind. Just think about Tommy yelling, “Run away like you always do,” two episodes ago and then watch him run in, grab the nail bat, and push himself between this monster and Nancy and tell me he wasn’t already well on his way.

That’s the other thing. Everyone has a reason to be here. They have various ties to Will. Then there’s Nancy, who lost Barb to this thing and then got dragged in a little further because her brother is involved. Jonathan is here for Will. Steve is here for Nancy. Something that remains consistent through where we are in the present.

We don’t have much of an idea of what happened over the next month. How Nancy ended up back with Steve instead of with Jonathan. There are vague mentions in season two of how Nancy waited and Jonathan says it wasn’t long enough, but I’ll talk about them then. But we end this season with a relatively happy ending for Steve. Unfortunately for him, you can tell that there’s still something unfinished between Nancy and Jonathan and that Steve is blissfully unaware or willingly ignoring it.

The thing is, we’re watching her fall into the “normal” that she’s already stated she is afraid of. With the boring one-time jock and a house at the end of the cul-de-sac.

That, however, is actually a great segue into season two!

Season Two

2x1

Almost an entire year later, Steve and Nancy are still together and Nancy is desperately trying to be what is expected of her while desperately trying to push Steve out of the box he is supposed to fit in. They’re reviewing his college essay and he knows it’s crap and he’s so dejected over the whole thing, because he doesn’t even want to leave anyway. He’s doing this, because she wants it. He wants to do it because she wants him to. So much of what Steve is doing is for Nancy, not for himself.

This whole thing reads like a conversation they’ve had before.

Nancy: You don’t have to go. Just work on this. Steve: No, no, no. What’s the point? Nancy: Hey, calm down. Steve: I’m calm. I’m calm. I’m just being honest, you know. I mean… I’ll end up working for my dad anyway. Nancy: That’s not true.

It’s a source of insecurity for both of them, but for different reasons. The difference is, Steve can see some positives to it. If he stays, he could get all those adult things. You know, insurance and benefits and everything you need to buy a house at the end of a cul-de-sac. You can practically see that thought flashing through Nancy’s mind as he’s saying it.

For some reason, he also seems to be nervous about leaving her in general. I would say that it’s because he’s jealous of Jonathan, but I’m not so sure that’s it. Or, not entirely. He’s probably a little insecure about their friendship, but I think it’s more that he’s concerned that if he’s gone, if he’s not here, Nancy is going to lose interest. Steve is one hundred and ten percent all in for this relationship and there is no way he can’t sense that Nancy isn’t.

I do also have to bring something up here. Consider it a little teaser for when we get into season three stuff, but Nancy is actively suggesting that Jonathan might meet someone if he comes to the Halloween party with her and Steve. MORE ON THAT LATER. Because more importantly in this scene, they’re very cute and having a little normal teen moment.

She kisses him back, but pulls away first. There is tension here. Not from him, though. He’s got the dopiest smile but she stares wistfully after Jonathan before she tries to pull herself back into the moment.

Really, the entire first episode is just proof that Nancy hasn’t been doing anything to work toward moving on. She isn’t ready to and that is completely valid. But she’s been trying to pretend that everything is okay and it isn’t working. She isn’t even that good at hiding it. Steve can tell that the dinners with Barb’s parents are hard on her. He checks in with her on the porch and everything. They’re probably a source of stress for him, too, but he’s so much better at pretending than Nancy is.

2x2 – 2x3

Let’s start off episode two right with physical touch: 7.

Again, it’s a comfort thing, right? This starts off as a general touch to get her attention, but his hand stays when he sees that she’s freaking out. Nancy, understandably, is holding onto a lot of trauma. Trauma that she associates with Steve. Steve, who is trying to fall back into some semblance of normal life and she’s followed, trying to make it work, but she resents him for how easy it is for him to do it.

Steve does say something very interesting here. “This isn’t some game, Nance. If they found out that we told any–” He looks around, panicking a bit, and then closes the blinds. “They could put us in jail, okay? Or worse, they could destroy our families. They could do anything they want, okay?” We still don’t know what they were told at the end of season one, but it was clearly enough to scare him. Nancy is opening up to him here and it’s making him freak out a little because he doesn’t know what to do or how to stay within the parameters that the government (?) has set. He can’t do what she wants, so he suggests what works for him. What we know works for him from season one. Pretending to be a stupid teenager for a few hours. (Note physical touch: 8 in that hug.)

But this is what Nancy’s been doing for the last year. She’s tired of pretending, but god, does she commit. She commits so hard that Steve has to pretend too, because he’s so busy trying to stop Nancy from drinking too much that he can’t really be a stupid teenager himself.

And being drunk means Nancy can be more honest with him than she has been.

You’re – you’re pretending like – like everything is okay. You know like… like we didn’t – like we didn’t kill Barb. Like – like it’s great. Like… we’re in love and we’re partying. Yeah, let’s party, huh? We’re partying. This – this is bullshit.

And Steve’s hand is shaking as he cups her face here, because yeah, he knew she was struggling, but she’s still pulling the rug out from under him here. (Also, physical touch: 9 aka the last one.)

I love Steve a lot, which I hope is obvious by now, and I really want to believe that he wouldn’t just abandon her at a party, but like. Jonathan isn’t friends with Steve. Do you really think Jonathan would follow Steve out to ask if he’s okay when he sees him running out, clearly upset? Or would he go check on Nancy? Especially with the way Jonathan says it to Nancy when she asks about it later. There’s more than a hint of a lie there. There also still is a little bit of King Steve left. I don’t really think it’s an ego thing, except it kind of is. Nancy is breaking his heart. She’s making him cry at a party with witnesses and his reputation is already a disaster.

Steve also isn’t above being petty. He’s apparently been picking Nancy up for school for however long now and just doesn’t do it the next morning.

Nancy just has so much confidence when she says, “And then you took me home.” Even Nancy doesn’t believe he’d just leave her at a party. But Steve is pissed and they’re fighting and he does kind of deserve to be mad, because she’s been hiding all these feelings from him for how long? And I do really believe that he cares about the Barb thing. Obviously not to the extent that Nancy does, but he knows she died at his party and he sees how much it hurts Nancy every time they go see her parents.

This is a lot of me defending Steve here, but Nancy deserves some defense, too. “I’ve been trying so hard to pretend like everything’s fine, but it’s not,” she says to Jonathan in her next scene. For Nancy, pretending like everything was fine ended up meaning Steve and as we all know by now, Steve isn’t exactly dealing with his emotions. Repression is the name of his game. Retreating into comfort. Status quo. And Nancy let herself get swept up in that, because it was easy, but in the end, Nancy wants revenge and Jonathan does, too.

2x4 – 2x6

I don’t want to dive too much into the Jonathan of it all, except it is kind of unavoidable. It is important to note that he is getting some revenge out of this, too. It isn’t some purehearted notion that he can help Nancy. He isn’t blindly following along here. Will still has lingering aftereffects from his time in the Upside Down and again, he wants revenge on the people he blames for that.

Also, we are reaching their portion of the show. I will try to keep this as brief as possible.

It is strange to me that the people who are pushing Jonathan and Nancy together are adults. Flo with her comment about “love” being the only thing that makes you that crazy. This hotel lady who gives them a disbelieving look when they want two beds. Murray. But the people who are pushing Steve and Nancy together in season four are their peers? Dustin and Robin, primarily. Eddie. Steve himself. Even a little bit of Nancy.

Regardless, this is where we learn that Nancy waited for Jonathan to make a move after season one. That it took her a month to officially get together with Steve.

Jonathan: Will needed me. And Steve….. Nancy: I waited. Jonathan: Yeah, like only a month.

I mean, listen, Jonathan. What do you expect? For her to wait around for you forever? That’s just the least cool thing ever. It makes sense that his priority would be Will, but it puts everything into glaring contrast once again. Nancy is not going to be his top priority. Ever.

And then we meet Murray. This, of course, lines up with us seeing Steve go to Nancy’s house with flowers, ready to apologize. Even though he thinks Nancy might not love him the way he loves her, he’s willing to try anyway.

I’m going to veer wildly off-topic for a second, although maybe it’s not as off-topic as I think. There is a reason that she is his top priority and that’s because his character was essentially built as an accessory to Nancy. Of course, there are other things that we know about him, like his parents suck and Nancy made him feel seen in a way he wasn’t before. So, even taking into account the fact that he wasn’t much of a character outside of her prior to this season, there are reasons for that, too. It’s a very normal teen thing to go through, I think. Hell, it’s an adult problem, too. Defining yourself based off what you think you need to be for someone else. Which is where I come around to saying that I think their separation over the next two seasons was very important and ultimately a good thing for him and his character. For both of them, actually.

Anyway, back to Murray, who says a lot of things Nancy takes to heart. There is one I think hits the hardest for her, and it’s not actually the “we like Steve, but we don’t love Steve” moment. It’s this:

You’re being naïve, Nancy! Those people… they’re not wired like you and me, okay? They don’t spend their lives trying to get a look at what’s behind the curtain. They like the curtain. It provides them stability. Comfort. Definition.

Murray does also pull out this gem:

You’re harder to read. Probably, like everyone, afraid of what would happen if you accepted yourself for who you really are and retreated back to the safety of… name? Name?

All of it is just piling onto the rest of her insecurities about Steve, who is tempted to take the easy way out and work for his dad so he can have insurance and benefits and head down that road leading toward a loveless marriage. Steve, who is trying so damn hard to pretend like everything is normal. Trying so damn hard to get her to feel that way and is accidentally dismissing her grief by doing so. That is what is so painful about their whole extended breakup this season. Neither of them are doing these things on purpose.

2x8 – 2x9

Okay, let’s just move on. And I know, I skipped over Steve and Dustin’s little chat. It’s pretty self-explanatory. Plus, we’ve just got so much to unpack with these next two episodes.

Everyone regroups. There’s something cinematically beautiful about the way this happens. Steve is off with the kids and he hears a noise, turns toward it, starts to run toward it. But it’s Steve who notices it. And who notices a noise on the other end? Nancy.

Like, I know it seems sort of dorky to focus on shots like these, but they don’t usually do stuff like this by mistake.

Nancy also shifts between Steve and Jonathan a lot during these scenes. Like, she can’t decide where she’s going. She’s near Steve when they’re all arguing before the gate opens and she’s near him again when they’re all trying to get it open. Once they get back to the Byers house, she’s comforting Jonathan and Steve walks off, with the same sniffle/nose swipe he does at the party when he walks away from her, by the way. And then it’s her and Steve putting up the tarps and boarding things up and her and Steve together for the morse code scene and her and Steve on the front lines of the fight and her and Steve looking for space heaters in the back yard.

I could talk about the narrative meaning behind them boarding up the shack together, but that’s been talked to death already. The symbolism is so obvious. What I haven’t seen discussed is that while she’s complimenting him on how he took care of things while she and Jonathan were off doing their thing, he’s the one with the staple gun. Nancy’s got the duct tape and is helping him, but Steve is the one doing the work. Which, you know, Steve is also the one doing all the work with this breakup.

It's him who tells her to go with Jonathan. He recognizes that there is nothing salvageable here. He sees where she really wants to be and wishes he could have been there for her in the way Jonathan was, but knows he wasn’t brave enough to help her the way she wanted and she wasn’t brave enough to actually ask for that help. Their relationship was essentially over when he walked away from her in the alley, but here he makes sure she knows, in no uncertain terms, that it is over and it is okay that it’s over.

Steve also has a harder time looking at her here, which is so interesting, because she can’t take her eyes off of him. Steve tells her that she should be with Jonathan, the way that Murray and Flo and that motel lady told her there was something there. And none of it has felt good for her. This final nail in the coffin is not a relief. The long shot on her staring after him is not a happy one.

I mean, they literally left the space Steve was standing in empty. They didn’t do a zoom on her face. They panned out to show how empty that spot beside her was.

Everything I’m saying here boils down to this, I guess. Everyone’s been telling Nancy she isn’t in love with Steve and honestly, I don’t know whether or not I even think she was. What I usually end up landing on is that she wants to be in love with Steve. He says he was a pretty shitty boyfriend, but the few things we see of them early this season do not paint it in that light. Not exactly. Overall, he cared about her a lot and he tried to support her, even if it wasn’t in the way she wanted, and I think she knows that. Their relationship wasn’t bad. It just wasn’t enough for her right now. And here Steve is absolving her of all of that. He couldn’t help her shoulder the responsibility of Barb’s death, so he takes on the responsibility of ending their relationship when he knows she wants something else and that… is just so heartbreaking. For Nancy, as well as Steve. (Also, Steve isn’t with Nancy anymore but he goes with her to Barb’s funeral. He arguably has no reason to go, but he does, because it’s right.)

I had to come back up here to add that while Nancy is staring sadly after Steve, we have a bit of voiceover with Mike’s lines from the next scene. Just be careful, okay? I can’t lose you again. I don’t have a lot to say about this now, but I think I mentioned this before somewhere. Editing choices like this are on purpose.

So, Steve watches the girl he loves drive off with the guy she can actually love right now and he stays behind to babysit. He stays behind to protect the kids, because that’s what he told Nancy he would do. He tries to fight Billy to protect Lucas and Max. He lets the kids drag him down into a nightmare pit and he does protect them. He saves Mike when the vines grab him. He pushes the kids out of the hole ahead of him and puts himself in front of Dustin when the demodogs are charging.

And what I’m about to say is possibly an unfair characterization of Nancy here, but she has almost been turned into an accessory of Jonathan’s in this last fight. She isn’t in charge. She doesn’t really contribute. She’s here for comfort. Which is fine, but it’s not very Nancy. At least, not the Nancy we know now. Nancy takes charge. She takes action. And this isn’t really her fight and you can sort of feel that through the entire scene.

The final part of this season has also been talked to death. Steve taking Dustin to the dance, helping him get ready, giving him a pep talk, and then Nancy taking care of Dustin at the dance. This is also one of the scenes that really convinces me they’ve shifted to endgame Steve/Nancy at this point. Because Dustin goes into the dance and he stares longingly at Max and Lucas while they dance right after Steve stares longingly at Nancy who he knows is with someone. It’s hard to ignore that parallel, even if Dustin does later move on while Steve doesn’t. Anyway, Steve and Nancy aren’t together anymore, but they’re still working on the same side to take care of Dustin and that is not a coincidence. Apart, their priorities are starting to align, even if neither of them are aware of it.

Season Three

We’re really in it now. Honestly, for as little of it as we got, I love the Steve and Nancy content from this season. The fucking parallels of the way they’re living their lives without each other is unreal. I think this will be a short section, but who fucking knows with me.

We start off with a great parallel. Nancy is working her summer job at the newspaper and it is not going as planned. And also, we want to talk about shitty boyfriends?

Nancy: They don’t actually like me or respect me as a living, breathing human with a brain. Jonathan: Wait, you just – you just gotta be patient, okay? They’re set in their ways, you know? But once they realize what a gifted writer you are, they’ll come around.

First of all. This is literally the same behavior we had from Steve in the beginning of season one. But it’s on purpose. Jonathan is actively trying to sweep her problems with this job under the rug. Second. Man, I don’t know if I really want to get into this. I don’t really want to bash on their relationship, because it’s fine, but their communication is pretty broken down, too. Once again, Nancy has a boyfriend who is advocating for the status quo. Advocating patience. Nancy has been tired of patience for a while now. She is tired of pretending everything is fine.

So, yeah, Nancy? Not happy at her job. Swipe over to Steve who is, surprise, also not happy with his job. His life is not going as planned. Girls don’t find him attractive right now (their loss). He didn’t get into college and his dad wouldn’t hire him as a punishment.

Robin: Have you considered telling the truth? Steve: Oh, you mean that I couldn’t even get into Tech and my douchebag dad’s trying to teach me a lesson? I make three bucks an hour and I have no future? That truth?

He looks genuinely upset. This is worse than he was afraid of last year. He doesn’t have anything he did at this point last year. Not even an ounce of it, and yet, he still approaches everything with this next-level confidence no matter how miserable he is. But this is another on purpose narrative parallel. Steve and Nancy are both not good. Jonathan is.

Even though I’m kind of skimming this season, I’m going to put it into unlabeled sections or I’m going to lose my mind over the formatting.

That doesn’t matter. What does matter is that Jonathan and Nancy are fighting, because they got fired over something she started. He didn’t even try to defend them. Nancy did. And now he’s pissed, because he lost his job. Which I do get (I grew up in a similar financial situation). But there’s this thing about him where he knows how to hit her where it hurts.

I don’t live in a two-story house on Maple Street. My dad doesn’t earn six figures. Hell, he isn’t even around. �� Mortgage, college tuition, you know, those are real things, Nancy. Things that you don’t care about only because you don’t have to. … You want everything handed to you on a silver platter. I mean, we were interns, Nancy! Interns! What did you expect? That you would make star reporter in a month? Crack the big case?

This is so much like the argument they had in season one where he called her out about the cul-de-sac and boring one-time jock and it all boils down to what Nancy says here. I guess we just don’t understand each other anymore. And she’s right. It’s true. They understand each other when there is a cause they both want to fight, but when it comes to normal life, there is a disconnect that they can’t seem to get past.

There’s something about how Jonathon didn’t think in season one. He says that to Joyce when she mentions that he endangered himself and Nancy. And then here, Nancy is talking to her mom, and says almost exactly the same thing. To be honest, I wasn’t thinking about him. I wasn’t thinking about anyone really. It’s this great bonding moment for Nancy and her mom, because we can hear Karen confirming (not explicitly) the things Nancy said about her in season one. How she obviously wanted more for herself. And she sees Nancy who wants things for herself and she encourages her not to stop, because she doesn’t want to see Nancy fall into the same thing she did. Nancy’s mom believes in her so much.

Honestly, there’s a super interesting comparison here between Jonathan and Nancy’s story and Dustin and Steve’s story. Steve hesitated in seasons one and two. Ultimately, he followed through, but he hesitated at first. Here, in season three, he willingly dives back in. And then there’s Jonathan who dove right in with Nancy in the first two seasons and now that his family isn’t in trouble, now that there isn’t anything in it for him, he is hesitating.

Of course, that all changes once Nancy says she thinks Will might be in danger. All of a sudden, Jonathan’s back in it.

LISTEN. I’m so excited about this connection I made in my notes.

2x8, Jonathan to Will: Sorry I wasn’t there. I should have been here. 3x5, Will to Jonathan: You weren’t there?! And his response: Well, I’m here now, aren’t I? With Nancy’s addition of: Hallelujah. 4x9, Jonathan to Nancy: I’m sorry I wasn’t here. And Nancy’s response: To be honest, I’m kind of glad you weren’t.

LIKE. LOOK. It’s just a thing about recurring themes and who always shows up, isn’t it?

Can I just drop this here and then go off about it later? I think I have to. This is now a teaser.

There is a bright side for Jonathan, which is his apology. Except for the fact that in the next episode, he’s already kind of backed off from it and is doubting her again.

Okay, I want to talk about Steve again. Steve’s redemption arc obviously started in season one, but we’re really seeing the culmination of his character arc over the last three seasons fall into place during his conversation with Robin. It is ridiculously self-aware in a way that I’m not sure people realize Steve is. But you can’t move on from the past behavior he moved on from without being self-aware. Anyway, I love this moment from him.

Robin: You were a real asshole, you know that? Steve: Yeah, I know. Robin: But it didn’t even matter. It didn’t matter that you were an ass. I was still… obsessed with you. Even though all of us losers pretend to be above it all, we still just wanna be popular. Accepted. Normal. Steve: If it makes you feel any better, having those things isn’t all that great. Seriously. It just baffles me. Everything that people tell you is important, everything that people say you should care about, it’s all just… bullshit.

This, on top of another line from this scene: Maybe instead of being here, I’d be on my way to college right now. It’s all coming down to Nancy. The first hint is bullshit, obviously. That’s pretty much Nancy’s catchphrase at this point. She called him out during their bathroom fight for being bullshit. It’s something that has probably informed a lot of his growth over the last year of his life. But the second hint is the mention of college. He’s still thinking about the things Nancy tried to make him believe he could have in life, but the difference is, he actually seems to want them for his own reasons now.

And I’m about to say something. I don’t know the fandom’s opinion on this, because I’m not super keyed into the fandom for this show, but like. Okay. We all know Steve was lying when he says he’s not in love with Nancy anymore, right? Robin hasn’t metabolized the truth serum or whatever yet, or she has and she just has no filter, but Steve is 1000% lying. And like, one could argue that he’s convinced himself of this, but shit. It’s proven to be a lie almost immediately.

He’s going on here about how he’s found someone a little better for him and we are kind of taught here that when it comes to meaningful relationships, Steve has a type. Super smart. Maybe a little shy, but actually super confident and sure of themselves and what they want. Robin and Nancy are actually pretty similar when it comes down to the list of bullet points about their personalities. And he’s trying really hard to replace Nancy and it might have worked if Robin were into guys, but she isn’t.

Which leads me to my favorite Steve moment ever that isn’t related to Nancy. This pivot here? Fucking masterful. She is vulnerable and admits something very scary to him and it just does not bother him even a little. He is so supportive. I just love him.

Finally, let’s talk about when Steve and Nancy finally see each other again. I feel like this has to be his least ideal way of seeing her again. In this little sailor outfit that he has to wear for his job after he got beat up. The amazing thing here is that Nancy runs right up to him to check on him. And the best part, the most promising part, is that she’s jealous of Robin.

I’m sorry. Who are you?!

And poor Steve over here is just staring at her. Blatantly staring.

Does anyone really want to tell me he still doesn’t have feelings for her after that look? And vice versa. Honestly, it’s the way she just immediately doesn’t like Robin for me. Nancy looking from Robin over to Steve like she’s looking for some kind of hint as to what he was thinking when he pulled her into his.

Okay, really, I just love so much about this finale. It’s wild how good it is.

Once they’re split up, it’s Steve (again) who notices that something is wrong before anyone else. That shot of him staring off into the distance just like last season, looking in Nancy’s direction and knowing that something isn’t right down there.

And then when they hear the noises on the walkie, he throws himself up and starts sprinting for the car. It’s so good.

NOT TO MENTION. Nancy being a fucking badass and putting herself between everyone and Billy’s car and then Steve smashing in at the last possible second to save her. It’s just. IT’S SO GOOD. The way he doesn’t even hesitate to crash his car into Billy’s is so good. (Remember that whole thing about who is always there?) It doesn’t feel like there’s much to elaborate on with all this, except you remember how I said the thing up above about Jonathan hesitating this season until his family is involved and Steve not doing that? Well, here’s Steve not hesitating.

Season Four

This section is long. Take a break here if you have to.

4x1 – 4x3

Here we are! Season four! Now, I’ve always loved Steve and Nancy together and it’s always felt clear that there was some unfinished business there, but I didn’t expect what we got in this season. Not even a little.

By the end of the first episode, we know where Steve and Nancy’s love lives are.

I’m going to talk about Nancy’s first, because there’s obviously some Jonathan talk. I actually really liked the way that this scene was set up. It weirdly shows that they’re on the same page about where their relationship is. They’re both a bit in denial about how things are going. They defend each other and their relationship while giving no real reason why they’re not going to see each other over the break. Jonathan’s mom works and he has to watch his brother and Jonathan wants to be there for his acceptance letter, all in her lying voice. The voice that kind of cracks and goes up an octave at the end of her sentences. And Jonathan saying that Nancy works over breaks, because that’s the kind of dedicated person she is. When really, the only thing being communicated loud and clear here is this: if they wanted to see each other, they could have.

With that out of the way, let’s take a look at where Steve is sitting. He’s over here saying things like, “Do I really want to start another relationship that has no point other than sex?” The answer: no. And things like, “I really dig this girl. I mean, I think that she could – who knows, maybe she could be the one.” Is she the one, Steve? Is she? Are you on the same page? Because she thinks Tammy Thompson is a good singer. I mean, I know and we know that he’s just saying that to Dustin. He doesn’t really believe it. There’s no conviction behind the words.

Hell, he admits in the next episode that he’s as hopeless as Robin. But you know, there’s this thing he’s doing while Robin is monologuing here. Especially this portion. “I know exactly what I want and I’ve found the girl of my dreams, but I just can’t get the courage to ask her out. Meanwhile, you go on like, a million dates and you have no idea what you want.” He’s staring off into the distance and thinking about something the whole time Robin is talking about that. Now, I don’t want to say he was thinking about Nancy here, except… I mean, listen. Veering into later episode conversations for a moment, it isn’t much of a stretch to assume that he does know what he wants. He’s just not saying it out loud, because there’s no point.

Meanwhile, we have Nancy reliving her trauma through Chrissy’s death. Pushing her back into action, because she knows it’s something more. This being here gives me a little hope that we might have a conversation between Steve and Nancy next season closing the loop on Nancy’s trauma and her subsequent resentment of their relationship.

But I’m getting off track again. The important things to bring up for Nancy in episode two is that once again, it is being highlighted that Jonathan isn’t here and she is annoyed about that. But in doing so, we also have to talk about how Jonathan is unloading all his worries onto Argyle. How he admits that Nancy’s dream for their future isn’t his and he’s been lying to her. He doesn’t want to go to Emerson. All he can see right now is the end of their relationship, whether it’s now or a more miserable years down the road.

Which, like, if you take into account later episodes once again… and you think about Robin telling Steve that he doesn’t know what he wants when we know for a fact that he does…. You see what I’m getting at?

Anyway, let’s circle back to how Nancy is annoyed that Jonathan isn’t here. How she just admitted this to Fred half a day ago and she is left alone, being questioned by cops who have never taken her seriously, she’s hugging her stomach and kind of hunched over and she just looks terrified.

But then, she sees Steve’s car pull up and everything shifts. There is visible relief. She is so taken aback.

The cops are still trying to talk to her, but she’s not looking at them. She’s not even listening to them. Their voices literally fade into the background. She’s laser-focused on Steve and the fact that he is there. She gives him a little wave. He gives her a little wave back.

And then she smiles.

Because he showed up. Steve didn’t even know that she needed support and he’s miraculously there.

There was so much focus the first two episodes about how Jonathan wasn’t there and how much that bothered her and the first thing that happens in episode three is Steve showing up when Nancy is in distress. And it keeps getting better!

First of all, we’ve got Steve who is staring at Nancy, which is why he notices that she’s splitting off from the group.

Which leads to his subsequent panic. “No, it’s too dangerous. You need… you need someone to….” Steve can’t really get the words out and I love the way Nancy looks at him here while she’s waiting for him to say what he thinks she needs.

Like, she doesn’t interrupt him. She doesn’t fire back or anything. Because, you know, I feel like a lot of people would expect her to deny help before he can offer it. But we already know that Nancy doesn’t want to be alone, because she’s said she doesn’t want to be alone. Remember? She’s annoyed that Jonathan isn’t here. And here’s Steve offering himself and his help without needing to ask.

Second of all, we have this look at Robin when she interjects and says she’ll go with Nancy.

We already know from the end of last season that Nancy isn’t Robin’s biggest fan. Of all people to tag along, she’s Nancy’s last choice. And then Robin’s giving him shit. “Unless you think we need you to protect us.” And he doesn’t have anything he can say to that. But he wanted to go with Nancy. So bad. And you know Robin knows it. I mean, look at that face.

He couldn’t say he wanted to go with Nancy to protect her, because he knows Nancy doesn’t need protection, but Robin knew what he wanted to say and she can one-hundred percent give him shit for it.

But you know, let’s circle back to Nancy and how she didn’t really say anything when Steve was saying he wanted to help. And her little smile and her shrug.

It looks a little like a “you tried” or “thanks anyway”. And we’re left with poor Steve gawking.

Pretty public, indeed.

Third, we have Dustin straight up calling Steve out about his feelings. You know, in case we missed any of the other hints so far.

And fourth. Finally. We have more jealousy from Nancy. Anyone who was caught off guard by this didn’t pay attention in 3x8, because this isn’t a new development. And really, hold on, I guess this means I get to talk about Robin a little more. Who obviously isn’t stupid. Like, last season, we have Steve telling her that he isn’t in love with Nancy anymore, but he hasn’t been able to commit to anyone since. See her ridiculous smile above again. And now, we have Nancy, saying, “You’re obviously bored, so why don’t you call Steve?”

You can practically see the lightbulb going off in her head. Especially coupled with Nancy’s eye roll that I didn’t notice until I was picking these scenes apart because the camera cuts away in the middle of it?

So, Robin, having her friends’ best interests in mind, practically falls down the stairs to reassure Nancy that she and Steve are totally not a thing.

I think you’re supposed to look less interested in this information, Nancy. Funny how immediately after this, Nancy is a heck of a lot nicer to Robin. I wonder why.

4x4 – 4x6

I’d like to start this portion of season four by saying that someone should really talk to Steve about how to look at your ex-girlfriend.

Or not. I mean, this is the right way to look at someone, really.

Once again, it’s being pointed out that Steve is here. That seems to be the theme this season. Not only that he’s here, but that he’s eager to throw himself into danger beside her now. To help. Nancy isn’t planning to take him with her, again, and Steve is following her around the house because he wants to go. He’s over here saying things like, “Why does it always have to be me? It’s like–“

What is it like, Steve?

And like, “I can’t do anything here, Nance!”

God, he wants to help so bad.

We also have Robin here to helpfully point out that Nancy still has a Tom Cruise poster in her room. In front of Nancy’s ex-boyfriend who once pointed out that his friends say he looks like her lover boy from Risky Business. Subtlety, party of zero.

The real thing I want to talk about here is how there’s a very interesting mix of comfort and tension. Nancy and Steve argue like they know each other so well, which they kind of do, but there’s something heavier here. Steve not wanting Nancy to run off into potential danger without him, because he wants to be there to know she’s okay. Right? Like I said. There’s no subtlety to any of this.

Honestly, this all reminds me again of how Nancy is the first person who took Steve seriously. I mean, sure, that’s something I’m kind of inferring from that wiki entry about their relationship, but it seems valid. How she listened to him in a way no one else did and it made him feel seen and heard and he’s trying to communicate with her here that he doesn’t want to be left behind, because of that.

Next episode, we find them all sleeping in the Wheeler’s basement. And positioning, my friends. It is so important. Steve is passed out in that chair and when Nancy wakes up, sitting up, she’s on the floor right in front of said chair? Yeah. That happened. How and why? We’ll never know for sure. But there’s a whole thing I could say about gravitating toward each other as a source of comfort. Or more specifically Nancy possibly gravitating toward Steve as a source of comfort because he’s there and helping.

But the real important thing this episode is Steve and Nancy breaking down those barriers, right? Another thing that I know has been discussed to death, but we can’t have a Steve and Nancy essay without this point, can we? They end season two boarding up a building together. Symbolically closing off communication between the two of them, because they were not on the same page then. Or, they were, but it was too late.

And this season, after over a year of growing separately, they are officially on the same page and reopening lines of communication and vulnerability with each other. Not only that, but during this whole conversation, they’re nonverbally checking in with each other the entire time. Everyone is participating in this conversation, but they’re looking at each other.

Hell, even a verbal check-in before they open the door.

I mean, talking about a lack of subtlety. But Steve asking “ready?” before they let the plank of wood fall down is fucking wild, honestly.

I’m going to talk about Robin being involved with a significant portion of Steve and Nancy’s major moments near the end of this. Just, that’s another teaser for you. But it’s a thing and it’s big.

How about this cobwebs scene, huh? I feel like I should just make a collage of Nancy’s faces here. It’s just… I hear a lot of talk about how devastatingly fond Steve looks all the time when he’s looking at her, but this is just ridiculous.

The soft little smiles when he can’t see her. Like, maybe it’s just me, but how do you smile like this when you’re picking cobwebs out of someone’s hair?

And what is with this direct, prolonged eye contact from both of them??? Steve???

The way Nancy goes from smiles

to just sad?

And then he says his little thing that he wants to make him sound smart and he just completely butchers it and Nancy is back to smiles again?

Honestly, her face is a journey here and it’s really better shown via mediocre gifs, so have these.

So, now that I’ve gushed over the faces in this scene, maybe I should try talking about it in a little more clarity. I’m not sure I can, though. They’re just so cute. Steve opening the door and being like, hey we should hang out again. You know, with people. Because that’s safer, right? It’s a safe way for him to say he misses having her around without having to actually say it. Nancy’s picking up what he’s putting down and she’s charmed. Honestly, I’d love to have some more information about how things went when they were first getting together. Or however they got together after season one. Because he’s rambling. It’s cute. Nancy thinks it’s cute.

But then they’re looking at each other again and making that incredibly direct eye contact and the gravity of the situation hits her. And by the situation, I mean the fact that both of them could step away, could separate, and they just don’t. They stay in each other’s space and they look at each other and Steve tries to say something smart and ends up fucking it up, but it’s still cute and y’all it’s those feelings that are bubbling back up whether she wants it to or not.

And in the next episode, we finally have Steve and Nancy standing directly next to each other almost every time they’re in a scene together. Before this, they’ve been separated by the group, tending to be across from each other more often than side by side. But until they split up again in season nine, they’re placed next to each other a majority of the time.

That’s just a little aside, though. The real content here is Robin wishing happiness for her friends.

If I’m permitted to see a silver lining in any of this end-of-the-world doom and gloom, it would be the rekindling of some old flames that frankly never should have been snuffed out. I didn’t mean that as a hint or anything. … But if I did mean it as a hint, would that be so terrible? For me to wish happiness for my friends?

Before I move onto Nancy’s entire monologue, can I just point out the absolute panic from our beloved Nance in the middle of this whole thing from Robin?

It’s honestly very reminiscent of the conversation with Murray in season two, where he’s telling her the whole “we like Steve but we don’t love him” thing and she gets very defensive. She didn’t know then if she was making the right choice and the past couple days for her, it’s really been driven home that she still doesn’t know if she made the right choice.

And then we have Nancy’s not even a little concealed “uh oh I’m about to vent all over this poor person” here.

I could tear apart this monologue from her. It’s a really good one, though… is it a monologue if it’s one sentence that lasts an incredibly long time? That doesn’t matter. Nancy is finally admitting to someone, to Robin, that she doesn’t know if she’s happy. That things with Jonathan are not good. That she has been feeling their relationship crumble for a while and she can’t get ahold of him to find out if it’s just the distance or if they’ve genuinely grown apart. While yes, this is huge for the Steve and Nancy of it all, it’s also just huge for Nancy in general. The poor girl hasn’t had a real close friend since Barb died and Robin is barely implying the hey you can talk to me and Nancy takes full advantage immediately.

Obviously the final thing we have to talk about in this chunk of episodes is the boat. Very proud of Steve who will not be left behind again just jumping into that boat, because he is going to be there, damn it.

But also, personal space? Steve and Nancy don’t know her.

I mean, Eddie and Robin are doing their part, sitting on the bench like normal people. Meanwhile, Nancy is over here with her knee as close as it can be to Steve’s without actually making contact.

You know, it’s absolutely bonkers how this is panning out. Nancy went to Steve in season one about Barb first, right? She saw the, at that point in time, unknown creature behind his house and she went to him first. He dismissed the whole thing because he was more focused on how it affected him than on the greater issue at hand. And here we are, a couple years in the future, and he’s right next to her, ready to dive into potential danger the way she wanted in the first place. Of course, we can’t talk about all that without talking about how worried she is when she realizes what he’s doing.

And what’s his response to this? It’s gotta be me. No complaints, all right?

And Nancy. Girl. I mean, no one can blame her, but she’s out here ogling Steve. In front of EVERYONE.

It’s pretty fucking public. And Robin is delighted to clock this.

Again, I think I mentioned this as a teaser already, but I’m going to re-tease it. Robin is so important to Steve/Nancy this season. Like, it’s ridiculous.

Nancy doesn’t even give a shit that it’s public. She’s not paying any attention to Robin or Eddie. These two dorks can’t keep it together for one second. She tells him to be careful and he gives her that quiet little nod.

They have zero chill about each other. Honestly, it’s just like… that whole thing I already said where his character development has taken him to this place where he’s pretty much exactly what Nancy wanted from a partner originally. Do people really think that’s an accident?

Anyway, she continues to have zero chill the entire time he’s underwater.

And again when he resurfaces, she’s just got to smile like that?!

But yeah, here we get our moment with zero hesitation. Where Steve is yanked back under the water and Nancy is the one to get it together first and dive right in. Steve will probably say that she’d do it for anyone and would she? Yeah. That’s who Nancy is. But they didn’t show us her diving into danger for anyone. They showed her diving into danger to save Steve for reasons.

4x7

I’m trying to decide how to talk about the post-demobat fight scene, because there’s a lot to it. I could make a joke about how Nancy was looking for any excuse to touch Steve, because. I mean.

Which, sure. That’s a little bit of it, isn’t it? But also, she’s worried about him. They’re not minor wounds, by any means.

Nancy has to make sure that he’s not about to die on her. And of course, he makes a stupid joke saying that he’s never been better.

But like, really, what this is about is Nancy’s relief and their connection. She does that thing again when he makes that joke, when she sees that he’s (mostly) okay. The same thing she did in episode three when she saw him pull up and her entire body sags with relief.

It’s giving me “I’m doing this for you” and [Steve runs back into a house he knows a dangerous monster is in] in a weird way. Don’t ask me to elaborate. I’ve been elaborating for such a long time.

Also, do you mind if I briefly die over the fact that Steve is incredibly injured and still he puts himself in front of everyone when the next wave of bats shows up?

Anyway. Nancy is the one they have immediately run to his side there. And when they’re hiding under Upside Down Skull Rock and he stumbles, she’s the one who runs to his side again. Well, she was already there, because she’s so keyed into how he’s doing here.

Continuing her trend of not hesitating, Nancy doesn’t hesitate to rip off part of her shirt to bandage up Steve’s wounds here. I also need to make sure you all know that she asks him if the bandage is too tight, which is a direct and on purpose parallel to season one where she’s sort of dating Steve and bandaging up Jonathan’s hand and she asks him if it’s too tight. Like. Girl. How do you feel about this narrative you’re in?

It makes sense that it’s a parallel, because she and Jonathan were pretty close to kissing there when Jonathan interrupted and there should technically be something interrupting these two now, but their audience isn’t paying attention to them, which means that no one is really noticing how… uh… flirtatious and sexual this scene is except for these two. I mean. These two definitely notice.

Like, she tightens the bandage and I’m pretty sure she tucks the ends of it into his pants for him while he’s up there running his hands through his hair in what is arguably the most attractive first aid scene ever on television.

The tension here? Unparalleled. And what does he do when he’s looking at her like this?

He fucking thanks her. And Nancy’s sent through a whole face journey, as she often with Steve this season.

But like, Robin and Eddie are literally turning their backs and giving them privacy for this, which is wild. Giving Steve and Nancy time for prolonged eye contact and confusing feelings that are violently resurfacing.

I mentioned earlier in this thing that Nancy and Steve are framed together a lot in the latter half of this season. I really like the way they did it, actually. Because when they have an incredibly intimate moment, like the above first aid moment above, we see Nancy pull away after to take some space. Like she has to remind herself that the ability to take space exists and that she should probably take it.

But the gap is always closed after. And in this case, it’s closed by Steve with another little joke and Nancy flirts. With more prolonged eye contact. And he knows she’s flirting.

IT’S PRETTY PUBLIC.

I don’t have a lot to say about this shot, except I do love how annoyed they both look by Eddie’s interruption.

Remember what I said about close, intimate moments followed by Nancy forcing separation? Well, that’s about to happen again immediately with this earthquake. They hold onto each other for thirty whole seconds. The earthquake lasts for eight of those. So, for twenty-two seconds after it ends, they just stand there like this.

I guess I did make a joke about Nancy looking for any opportunity to touch Steve, but it’s vice versa, too, right? He’s clinging to her shoulder and she’s clinging to his arm and it’s a lot. You can tell Nancy thinks it’s a lot, too.

But she’s still staring at Steve after, so we know even more that Nancy is forcing space she doesn’t necessarily want, even though she has to take it.

Let me just… I want to write out Eddie’s whole speech, because it’s just important.

See? The only reason I came in here was ‘cause those ladies came in straight after you. Now, I was too ashamed to be the one who stayed behind. But Wheeler? Right there? She didn’t waste a second. Not one second. She just dove right in. Now, I don’t know what happened between you two, but if I were you? I would get her back. ‘Cause that was as unambiguous a sign of true love as these cynical eyes have ever seen.

That, with the subtitle [subdued emotional music] with Steve staring longingly after Nancy? You can tell he doesn’t believe it. Or he doesn’t want to allow himself to believe it, but he wants to so bad. Because, you know, Eddie doesn’t know what happened between the two of them and there is so much history and weight between Nancy and Steve and it wasn’t his fault, but he’s also the one who ended things and made the official choice to walk away. So, yeah. Poor Steve.

You know, I find the order that they choose to go back through the gate to be pretty interesting. Robin, Eddie, Nancy, and then Steve. Why is Steve the last out when he’s injured? I know that, logically, it’s because there’s intended to be another Steve and Nancy scene here, but what are they even thinking here?

And then Steve nods at Eddie to go up. Neither of them are super willing to leave the other behind and I think that’s lovely.

And finally, we’re being shown what we already know. Nancy’s biggest source of trauma. Steve’s pool. The night Barb died. They pointed out how time stopped in the Upside Down the night Will went missing, because Nancy’s flashcards weren’t done. It’s a bit like how Nancy got stuck in her grief, right? Symbolically? And showing us that her grief is still there, that some of that lingering self-blame is still there, is obviously going to be super important. Eventually. Just not this season.

4x8

This sort of overlaps with the previous episode, but we’ll lump it all together here. Steve’s panic and desperation, trying to get Nancy to hear him, yelling at everyone else to figure it the fuck out. “Stay with me,” with his hands on her shoulders, then her face, then her shoulders and neck. And when she wakes up, she just collapses and he immediately catches her. “It’s okay, it’s okay, it’s okay. It’s okay, I’m right here. I’m right here.”

So, what do we get from this? Well, there’s the obvious. It’s been talked about multiple times in season four. Jonathan isn’t here. Steve is. And this isn’t a new thing for Jonathan. He apologizes at least once a season to someone for not being there. And, still obvious, but less so. After this moment, we have Hopper and Joyce talking to each other. “I thought I lost you.” / “I did lose you.” And then, perhaps less obvious. This kind of parallel to other couples on top of others. Mike says, “I’m here,” to El in season three while holding her. In this season, we hear Lucas talking to Max about how he sees her while we have Nancy starting to see Steve and his growth. We also have (in earlier episodes) Mike’s inability to tell El that he loves her directly paralleling Nancy’s inability to tell Steve she loves him in season two. And all the parallels to the start of Jonathan and Nancy’s relationship and unresolved tension that they carried around for a whole season’s worth of episodes before they did anything about it. And these are just the ones I pulled off the top of my head. I guess, since I’m going in chronological order though, I should focus on where we are in the timeline.

Nancy gives the team the download and she’s emotional the entire time. The camera shows us Steve’s reaction more than anyone else’s during Nancy’s speech. With the exception of Nancy’s, of course. But they show his reaction when she gets more emotional. He can’t look at her when her voice breaks. He’s kind of mirroring her here. She takes a shaky breath, he takes a shaky breath. She cries, he has to close his eyes.

Everyone else is staring at her in varying degrees of fear, horror, etc. But not him.

But she gets herself together and wants to go back and he argues with her. The others just kind of watch. It’s very clear that Steve and Nancy are the ones running the show and very clear that Steve is going to defer to her. And still, Max is saying her part and everyone looks to Nancy for her reaction, but Nancy looks to Steve.

For a long time.

Ah, and here we have the beautiful Winnebago talk. Nancy decided to ride up front with Steve and they are awkwardly attempting to make conversation and Steve adorably launches into a talk about what he always envisioned for his future while Nancy looks on with this face.

And NANCY THINKS IT SOUNDS NICE. Cue the [tenderly] in the captions when Nancy says, “Yeah,” back to his “Yeah?”.

I MEAN and Nancy’s over here just smiling like this half the time???

This whole scene is just perfection. And Nancy is thinking so hard after it?

Like, Steve tried to broach the future stuff with her one time as far as we know and she was not receptive in that moment. Here? She’s fucking receptive. Nancy sees this life, these dreams he has laid out for himself, and it’s yet another side of him she’s seeing that she likes. He’s reminding her that there is potential for a very nice life on the other side of all of this.

On the other end of this, we get a bit of insight as to where Steve’s head is actually at while he and Robin are making the Molotov cocktails.

Robin: In the face of the world ending, the stakes of my love life feel spectacularly low. Steve: Yeah, I mean, I get you there, but… I still have hope.

I want to unpack that first. Robin is bummed because she saw Vicki with a guy. Steve is here trying to be supportive and Robin pulls this out. And Steve. Steve?! This guy over here, who was scared to take what Eddie said to heart, who is about to march off into danger again, who just spilled his guts to his ex about the life he wants – this guy has hope.

Robin: Not everything has a happy ending. Steve: Yeah, yeah, believe me, I know.

Which he says with an incredibly unsubtle glance over at Nancy. And Robin, of course, follows his eyeline and lets out a quiet laugh, even though he looked away pretty quick. Robin’s been watching this whole thing unfold and she knows her bestie here has his heart just laying out there for someone to stomp all over again or pick up and she doesn’t know which is going to happen. Neither does he.

And still, the conversation ends up here. With Robin saying, “We have to try, right?” And yes, they’re talking about Vecna, but they’re also talking about everything else in life, because nothing in a story is that simple.

4x9

We’re here! It’s almost the end.

Let’s see. What should we touch on in the beginning of this one. Oh, the fact that the tension between them is somehow getting worse? Better? I guess it depends on your perspective.

Better, right?

The difference here is that this time, Nancy can’t put distance between them after this moment of intimacy. They’re literally marching off into battle side by side and Robin, their safety net, runs off. So, does she really want that distance?

Like, look at this. They’re talking about baby Steve being a total dork and it looks like they’re making date conversation, not walking through an evil parallel dimension off to fight some wizard/monster/generally all-around scary dude.

This portion is going to be lots of dialogue and screenshots. I’ll try to make it clear when I’m giving commentary, because I think this portion will be long.

Steve: I think, like, right out of the gate, like, I’m super confident, you know? But I’m also an idiot. Which is just, I mean, it’s a brutal combination. But, I mean, the good news is, I get a big enough thump on my head, I can change, you know? I can learn. I can crawl forward.

Nancy’s never really gotten to see this level of self-reflection from Steve, as far as we know. And he’s not being very complimentary of himself. But you know, she also missed out on experiencing a lot of this change. They went from being around each other on a fairly regular basis to seeing each other maybe a few times over the last year-ish and now he’s this whole other person. And it isn’t like she doesn’t know what ‘thump on the head’ he’s talking about.

Steve: Listen, I guess what I’m trying to say in a really stupid, roundabout way is, um….

Steve: … is thank you. Nancy: Thank me? Steve: Yeah. Nancy: For? Steve: For giving my head the biggest thump of its life two years ago.

Steve: I needed it.

I mean, how could it ever occur to her that he would thank her for breaking his heart? She’s never been proud of how their relationship ended. Don’t make me go pull up one of the season two screenshots again from when he’s walking away. So, the fact that he’s thanking her? I love it, but I can also understand why it would seem so unbelievable to her.

Steve: It changed my life. And now I’m crawling forward. Slowly. I just wonder sometimes… you know, if… some other girl had given me a proper thump before we met, would things have been different?

Honestly, I don’t have much to add here, except I feel like Nancy is on exactly the same page. If this had been Steve back when she needed him in season one, would things be different? This is what she wanted all that time.

Steve: Like, if we were meeting together for the first time right now, part of me… I don’t know part of me thinks we would’ve made it.

Nancy: Steve….

Steve: Remember the dream I told you about? About the Winnebago? Seeing the country with my six lil’ nuggets?

But the audacity of her to have such a sweet, soft smile when he’s reminding her of his dreams? Not to focus too much on negative fandom opinions, but how can anyone think she’s horrified by that? Like, this smile on top of her mild panic over him actually saying this out loud is such a combination though.

Steve: It’s all true. Every last word.

Steve: But I left one part out. It’s the most important part.

I MEAN COME ON. You cannot tell me that she didn’t know exactly where he was headed with this. With THIS face?! Look how open and receptive and patient she is???

Steve: You’re there.

Steve: You’ve always been there.

And Steve punctuating this whole thing with a soft, open, vulnerable smile. And Nancy looking up at him, also vulnerable and sad and like she can see the whole fucking picture he’s painting?

But then she looks down, remembering herself and where she is and what position she’s in, and his smile shifts.

They’re both so sad here. Like, they’ve both lost each other and they’ve come back to each other this season in so many ways. And here he is reaching out, but as soon as she looks down, it’s like he’s bracing himself for the worst.

Nancy’s about to say something. Finally. After another long moment of prolonged eye contact. And Robin interrupts.

Nancy isn’t even shocked or mad or relieved. The sadness there is too overwhelming. Steve, however, is annoyed. Timing, Robin. Even if Nancy was about to turn him down, I think he’d rather know now than not.

Also, can we finally talk about how Robin interrupts pretty much every single one of their major moments this season? I don’t even mean that in a bad way. It’s kind of how they pulled down the barrier on the door and she stepped up with the brick, saying she found the key to open the door. She smashes open the glass and then Steve reaches his arm in to unlock/open the door through the opening she made. Right??? So, first there was Steve trying to make sure Nancy stays safe instead of going off alone and Robin interrupting to go with her instead. Next, Steve and Nancy are lightly arguing about the visit to Victor Creel and Robin runs into the room behind them. Then, Nancy is helping Steve get the cobwebs out of his hair and Robin comes in with her commentary about spiders.

I could go on, but I think you have a general idea of where I’m going. There are more moments. So many. I’m actually pretty sure Robin interrupts every single moment between them except for the one where Eddie interrupted “for Steve’s modesty”.

Like I said, though, I’m not calling this out because I hate it. I’m actually calling it out, because again, there are reasons they do these things and I love it. It could mean a few things. One of them is that Robin was a pretty important part of Steve’s character growth. Another is that Nancy needs an onscreen friend who isn’t a love interest. But ultimately, it’s that Robin is integral to Nancy and Steve coming back together. I mean, she’s probably… mostly done her part. There were a few things that needed to be established by her. Nancy needed to know that Robin and Steve are not a couple. Nancy also needed to hear someone acknowledge the fact that she and Steve have unfinished business.

And… you know, okay. The thing that really helps me explain this point is the one where Steve and Nancy take the board down from the door at the Creel house and then Robin comes in with her brick and smashes open the window so that Steve can unlock it. DO YOU SEE WHERE I’M GOING WITH THIS?! Nancy and Steve have reopened the avenue to healthy communication. Robin has come in with a brick to smash that window open so that Steve can get in there and officially open the door. Which he’s done. You’ve always been there. Nancy didn’t get to respond, but… I mean… right?! It’s an open thread that will need to be addressed and I’m excited about it.

Oh, while I’m talking about how this is an open thread for them, let’s just take a look at Nancy’s face when Steve gets grabbed by the vines when they’re in the Upside Down.

I don’t even have anything to say about it. I just wanted to show you how much she doesn’t want to lose him.

I’m not even diving into how much I love the whole bit of Steve being the one to hand her the shotgun in Vecna’s lair. Twice. And I’m not diving into it in great detail, because I’ve already said it. They’re partners here. Which is what she wanted from the beginning.

OKAY. Let’s get back on track. There isn’t a lot more to talk about re: Steve and Nancy. Just a final note about Jonathan and Nancy, which again, has already been discussed by many other people, but it’s worth bringing up here, because it does have to do with Steve and Nancy in the end. We have proof that it has to do with Steve and Nancy because not only is one of their main topics of conversation Steve, but we have Steve reacting to their reunion.

Not sure if anyone here is a Bellamy x Clarke shipper, but this reminds me a lot of the pan to Clarke during Bellamy and Echo’s reunion in season five of The 100. Which a lot of people tried to write of as not romantic when it’s blatantly romantic in both cases. The difference for Steve is that he has Robin here to give him a comforting pat on the back.

Also, his face here is so similar to when he thought Nancy was going to turn him down after he gave her his whole speech in the Upside down.

Steve assumes he’s lost here. But we know the truth.

All right, so first, we have Jonathan apologizing for not being here (again). And Nancy’s whole fucking journey before she answers him.

The way she can’t really make eye contact, because she knows who was here.

And then we have her face when he brings up Steve?!

Like, she’s trying to laugh it off, but she can’t.

And she stands up for him, because he has grown up and she got to be around that for days and see the person he’s become and…. Damn. It gets so awkward after this.

Nancy’s inhale, like she might have more to say, but she can’t.

To top it off, we get to see them boarding up windows. Nancy holding up the boards and Jonathan hammering in the nails. And hmm, I wonder why that looks familiar. OH RIGHT. Because Steve and Nancy closed off communication in a very similar way back in season two before they officially split. This is veering into like, wild emotional speculation, but you ever think about how Nancy and Steve were putting up all that stuff using duct tape and staples and Jonathan and Nancy are using a hammer and nails. Which one of those is harder to break through?

And like, yeah. I’m saying that’s wild emotional speculation, but it makes sense to me, because… I mean, I can make the argument that Steve and Nancy’s hurdle is much easier to overcome than Jonathan and Nancy’s. Steve and Nancy were never not on the same page, per se. Nancy wasn’t exactly helping him plan a future that was aligned with hers and we know after this season that he wanted that. But their real problem was that Steve was too scared. Too scared to tell her he wanted a future with her and too scared to help her get revenge for Barb, so she retreated to the safety of someone who would. But the thing that’s hanging over Jonathan and Nancy is worse. Not only has he been planning a future with her that he doesn’t see himself in, but he hasn’t been following through. And he’s been lying about it. And she’s lying, too. He asks if she’s okay and she says they’re fine in a very (not) believable lying voice. He’s admitted to a friend that he’s slow-motion breaking up with Nancy. She’s admitted to a friend that she knows he’s hiding something and she doesn’t know where they stand. And unlike Steve and Nancy in season two, they let this stay unsolved at the end of the season.

Really, it does all come down to that future thing, doesn’t it? Jonathan doesn’t see one where they aren’t both miserable. Jonathan’s dream is NYU. It has been since he was six. He can’t tell Nancy that he doesn’t want to be part of her dream to go to Emerson, because he’s scared. Their relationship was supposedly built on shared trauma and connection, but a lot of that is lost now. The entire fucking group has shared trauma at this point. And Jonathan got Will back. Nancy never got her friend back. And now that Steve has evolved into a person who is an incredibly willing partner, who says that the most important part of his dream future is her… I mean….

Nancy: I feel like life keeps throwing things in the way of our big plans. Jonathan: Yeah, it sure seems like that.

Remember that thing I said like 10k words ago about how Steve is always going to be in the way of their relationship? If you pushed me, I might be convinced that Steve and Nancy were endgame since the moment they decided to keep his character around and kill him off. But my original thesis has its merits, too, so I’ll stick with it for now.

Well. Here we are at the end. It’s not looking good, guys. I mean, not for them. We, however, are looking at a very promising setup for season five. I suppose I could see a world where they decide to fix Nancy and Jonathan’s issues, but if they’re going to do that, there’s literally no point to all this setup in season four. I wish I were exaggerating, but what else is the point of bringing all of this up again?

I suppose that in a good paper, I would circle back to my original point, which is that the writers changed their minds about Nancy’s endgame relationship in season two and decided that Steve would be a better ending for her after all. And they did it to themselves. As I said multiple times, they built him into the perfect partner for Nancy. The person that she wanted from the start. And I know I’m talking a lot about what Nancy wants out of their relationship, but that’s because she’s the one who didn’t know what she wanted. Steve always has. He says exactly that. He wants Nancy and that’s it. He just needed to get to a place in life where she could see that future that he wants. And they’re there. And we’re stuck here waiting to see if they end up on the beach with a couple kids ten years down the road.

I think it’s looking pretty promising, but I guess I did just write 18.5k words on this, so if I didn’t, that would be weird.

If you’ve gotten this far, thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed my unhinged thought process and that we get some fun resolution to the unresolved threads that are left behind within the next year or so.

I don’t know how to end things.

But neither do Steve and Nancy.

Boom, roasted.

The end.

#stancy #steve x nancy #stranger things #i think my tag for this is #minor meta and wild emotional speculation #also just for good measure in case anyone thinks i'm being mean #anti jancy

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diana-fortyseven · 5 months

Text

I wrote this instead of sleeping...

You can find the prompt bingo right here.

It's still a work in progress, and there's so much more I want to add eventually, but everything that's already there is working.

And what's there is a lot. Like, a metric shit ton.

I've added all

Cinematic Titles

Mission Names

Mission Stories

Challenges

Destinations

of all Hitman World of Assassination Game Modes.

Some challenge prompts might look like typos to you. While I always appreciate when you point those out to me so I can fix them (seriously, please do let me know if I missed something!), please check first if there isn't an in-game challenge with that exact name, because so many of them look like I forgot how to spell. :D

Fun fact, did you know that there are roughly 1,200 challenges in the game? I wasn't joking about the "instead of sleeping" part of the title.

Additionally, there are long lists with smutty, kinky, romantic, angsty and whumpy prompts.

You can opt-out of NSFW, Shipping and Angst by not opting in (I swear this makes sense in my head right now), but if you select the theme "Romance" from the dropdown menu, you will get shippy prompts even if you don't tick the Shipping checkbox, and if you select Hurt/Comfort from the dropdown menu you will get angsty prompts even if you don't tick the Angst checkbox. I recommend ticking the Shipping or Angst checkbox if you select Romance or Hurt/Comfort for a larger pool of prompts.

You will not get NSFW prompts unless you tick the NSFW checkbox.

However, some mission stories and challenges have names that could be mistaken for NSFW prompts. I haven't put them behind the filter, and I don't know if I will do that in the future.

If you don't like a prompt, you can just re-roll that one specific prompt by clicking/tapping the field it's in.

The Themes

The bingo generator has four themed lists so far: General Prompts, Mission Fic, Romance, and Hurt/Comfort.

I will be adding more at appropriate times, such as a summer list for summer (Northern Hemisphere) or a Halloween list for Halloween. Those will be permanent additions. It's just a lot of work, and I have so many more plot bunnies and code bunnies and art bunnies, so I really have to space these updates out. xD

If you'd like to suggest a theme or donate a list of prompts, please feel free to do so!

How to Play

Create the card you want, do with it whatever you want.

You can take the prompts literally or interpret them any way you like. If it's the name of a mission story or challenge, you can use the mission story or challenge itself as a prompt, or come up with something just based on the name. If it's a pun, you can use the prompt as-is or remove the pun element from it.

Use as many or as few prompts as you want in a fic, or in a drawing, or in a daydream. You make the rules!

If you think a bingo should require a line of prompts used in one single work, cool. If you think four single works should count, that's cool too. And again, if you don't like a prompt, just re-roll it until you get one you like more.

Just have fun with it! :)

Mobile Version

The mobile version is working, but word breaks for longer words won't be pretty. I still need to add word break opportunities, but that's a lot of work, and I will probably do this in small batches over the next month or so.

If you want a prettier card, you can re-roll prompts with unpretty word breaks by tapping on the prompt you want to change.

Keyboard-Only Users

For accessibility, all prompt fields have added button functionality, which means you can use tab to select them and enter to interact with them. Your browser needs to have JavaScript enabled for that to work, though.

Now go play with it!

Or don't, I'm not your mum, I can't tell you what to do.

Final disclaimer: The platform I'm using to host my generators, Perchance, recently added AI options. My generators were not built using AI, and none of the prompts you'll get are AI generated.

My generators are all 100% handcrafted chaos. :D

If bingos are not to your liking and you'd like more detailed prompts, try my Hitman Prompt Generator!

#Hitman #Hitman Fandom #Hitman Bingo #D47 Codes

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winterrhayle · 26 days

Note

rank all of the 6 lunar chronicles books! i've asked a few of my friends irl this and ive seen very differing opinions so im curious (and ive seen how much you like ranking so..😂)

LOLLLL yeah ranking is my favourite thing ever ever ever ever ever ever its so fun okay (this is kinda long sorry hahaha) :

winter - this probably isnt a shocker, bc well ^^^ my url😭 literally what does this book NOT have. its 800+ pages, it contains so many perspectives, every single ship, every character dynamic is fully formed, the plot is insane and weaves together so well, the drama, the luna visuals, JACINTER, MISS WINTER HAYLE BLACKBURN.... like......... name a better book.... exactly. winter > everything. this is my go to book to reread and i think that its actually etched into the grooves of my brain. i have 2 copies of this book and they are my prized possessions

fairest - okay this ranking might be controversial, and i hate levana as much as everyone else does(just a disclaimer lol). but I LOVEEEE a character study, specially when said character is a villain. i read fairest after i'd completed all of the main 4 books and it just added so many more layers to the lunar characters (winter, levana, jacin etc), and also introduces us to evret, who is talked about in the main series but as we know he dies before the events of tlc :( but i loved his character and i found this book so interesting, also as a winter girl it was cool to see her parents, and her as a baby / toddler,, and also the og trio winter, jacin and selene / cinder own my WHOLE soul bc they are soooo <33333333333333 this book actually breaks my heart soo bad every time but i still crave rereading it bc its so good

cinder - ahhh when everything was somewhat simple, i like rereading this one to just go back to square one and like. reminisce on how everything begun and look at all of the seeds marissa planted (like that brief mention of winter and the descriptions of jacin aka the blond guard or whatever it was they described him as) . and i just love the kaider of it all of course and idk this one is just so nostalgic to me

scarlet - something about this book just keeps me on edge every time i read it. i literally cannot put it down once i start it and even though i know all of the plot twists and everything now im just constantly hooked. i love the visuals of this book, with the farm in rieux, and futuristic paris, and the fight in the abandoned opera house, soo cool. also i love how well this book in particular ties into little red riding hood because every single time i read the part about michelle actually being ran under glamour, aka the wolf disguised as the grandma like in the og fairytale, i am GAGGED its such a cool way to tie it into the lore of this series. annndddd i feel like i do talk about scarlet on here a lot because of winlet but i do NOT talk about wolf enough so let me just say something: wolf is such an interesting and complex character andi loveeee him and i love how much his personality varies from babygirl to actual killer hahhah

cress - i love this book to death BUTT i feel like some of the desert chapters kinda did drag on a little, especially as ive read this book so many times they're the scenes i tend to skim through (and this was true even BEFORE i became a cresswell hater tbh), but other than that this book is 10/10, i love the farafrah chapters especially, and i loved watching jacin be annoying and also i loved watching the rampion crew start to fill out and become bigger, ALSO this book has that iconic miscommunication scene where thorne and cress reunite with the others but thorne is blind so he didnt know that 'the wolf' cress was talking about was just our wolf (ze'ev) and the chaos of all that and cinder and dr erland and them almost getting arrested and escaping on the rampion / iko was pure chaos ALSOOOO this book had the technical introduction of winter bc you hear her adopting scarlet to save her which is fun so yeah !!! if they took out the cresswell of it all this book would be higher bc theres so much to love (and i mean this literally, this book is SO LONG)

stars above - this feels weird to rank because it isnt one full book, its a set of short stories, and the reason why its down here is because the only ones i consistently go back to are something old something new and the princess and the guard, if those two were full books they would probably be in the number 2 or 3 spot tbh (specially princess and the guard), but the thing is with stars above is that theres just a little too much filler for me,, like thornes chapter is pointless and is not interesting at all, and the little andriod actually is really sweet but i wouldve happily sacrificed that and thornes chapter to get more content with the other short stories, as i feel like they had a lot more to say (i do love cinders cameo in the little andriod tho)

#asks #anon #tlc #the lunar chronicles #mine #apologies again for the yap sesh i dont know how to condense things

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the-himawari · 10 months

Text

A3! Miyoshi Kazunari - Translation [SSR] MANKAI Feature (3/3)

*Please read disclaimer on blog; default name set as Izumi

---

Kazunari: It’s been a long time since we’ve worn these costumes! I’m psyched~!

Kumon: Everyone looks super cool!

Tenma: Well, even so, the star today is Kazunari’s Paul.

Kazunari: Leave it to me! I’m totes good to go. I’ve rehearsed my sword fighting and I got Settzer to support me!

Misumi: I can’t wait for the action scene with Paul!

Yuki: Make sure you show us a new side of Paul that we didn’t get to see in the main story.

Muku: Let’s do our best to make the spin-off cool and fun together!

Izumi: We’re ready on our end. Shall we get started?

-pause-

Izumi: (One night… while Paul is guarding the ship, his subordinate arrives in a panic.)

Paul’s subordinate [Kumon]: “Officer Paul! There appears to be some suspicious ships approaching, sir!”

Paul [Kazunari]: “…What was that?” “…There are quite a few of them.”

Paul’s subordinate [Kumon]: “I suspect it’s that infamous pirate band that’s been gaining strength recently!”

Paul [Kazunari]: “All hands on deck! Everyone, to your stations…”

*canon fires*

Paul [Kazunari]: “Urk…!”

Paul’s subordinate [Kumon]: “UWAHH!?”

Naval soldier A: “Enemy fire! Enemy fire!”

Naval soldier B: “Prepare the canons!”

Izumi: (Although the navy fought back resolutely, they became outnumbered and ended up allowing them to invade the ship.)

Pirate A: “Crush the navy to pieces!”

Pirate B: “Gyahaha, move outta my way!”

Paul [Kazunari]: “…Lowly pirates. The ones to retreat shall be you.”

*slash*

Pirate C: “Gahhh!”

Paul [Kazunari]: “HA!”

*slash, slash*

Pirate D: “GAHH!”

Pirate E: “Crap! How ‘bout a taste of this!”

*swords clash*

Naval soldier A: “Officer! There’s so many of them!”

Paul [Kazunari]: “…Do not falter! Go forth!”

Pirate F: “TAKE THIS!”

Paul’s subordinate [Kumon]: “…Officer!”

*slash*

Paul [Kazunari]: “—!”

*falls*

-pause-

Paul’s subordinate [Kumon]: “…Officer, officer!”

Paul [Kazunari]: “Ugh…” “…Ha!”

Paul’s subordinate [Kumon]: “Phew, thank goodness~… You’re awake now.”

Paul [Kazunari]: “This is… ! My hands have been restrained.”

Paul’s subordinate [Kumon]: “The pirates shackled us and threw us in this room…”

Paul [Kazunari]: “I heard that pirate band had been expanding their influence. But I never imagined there would be so many of them… I let my guard down.” “What is the current status report?”

Paul’s subordinate [Kumon]: “Although the navy is fighting back… It’s only a matter of time before our ship is captured.”

Paul [Kazunari]: “…” (In the name of the navy, we cannot simply resign ourselves to surrender our ship or become prisoners of war.) (When the time is right, I shall undo these shackles…) “…Hm? What was that?”

Paul’s subordinate [Kumon]: “What in the world? The scene outside seems to have changed…”

???: “TAKE THAT~!!”

*door opens*

Paul [Kazunari]: “!?”

Sky [Misumi]: “Huh? You’re…”

Paul [Kazunari]: “How come all of you are here…”

Sky [Misumi]: “So y’see~, we happened to pass close by this ship and it looked like quite a commotion was goin’ on.” “We thought you were throwin’ a party so we boarded. But for some reason, we got caught in a fight with some pirates~.”

Johnny [Tenma]: “Captain, I told you so many times that there was no way it was a party!”

Henry [Muku]: “It was obviously a naval ship no matter how you looked at it. Yet he didn’t listen at all and boarded it with a skip in his step.”

Sky [Misumi]: “S-shush!” “Well, either way, you’re in quite a bind, aren’tcha? We’ll rescue you!”

Paul [Kazunari]: “Rescue? Why would you pirates, our enemy, ever…”

Sky [Misumi]: “Why, you ask… erm… You don’t need a reason to rescue someone, of course!”

Francois [Yuki]: “I’m not sure what to think.”

Henry [Muku]: “Good grief…”

Paul [Kazunari]: “…Hmph. What nonsense.”

Izumi: (Despite his words, Paul stands up with a smile on his face. His handcuffs come off before they realize it.)

Paul’s subordinate [Kumon]: “…Huh. Officer Paul!?”

Johnny [Tenma]: “Wasn’t he handcuffed just now!? What happened!?”

Sky [Misumi]: “Impressive! You can do that!”

Paul [Kazunari]: “Who do you think I am? I’m the naval officer Paul.” “I simply let my guard down for a second earlier. Breaking this kind of restraint is nothing.”

Paul’s subordinate [Kumon]: “Officer… you’re amazing…!”

Francois [Yuki]: “Paul’s subordinate’s eyes are all shiny and twinkly. Rather than a subordinate, is he his fan or something?”

Henry [Muku]: “I think being skilled at escaping from custody makes him more suited for pirate work, wouldn’t you say?”

Paul [Kazunari]: “Let’s stop wasting our breath now.” “…Our counterattack starts now.”

Sky [Misumi]: “You said it! Let’s do this!”

-pause-

Izumi: (With the navy’s counterattack led by Paul, along with the Sky Pirates’ help, they captured the enemy.)

Sky [Misumi]: “That’s settled! Shall we throw a party together!”

Paul [Kazunari]: “…You carefree fool.”

*draws sword*

Paul [Kazunari]: “—”

Izumi: (Paul points his sword towards Sky.)

Sky [Misumi]: “Woah! How come!? We saved you, didn’t we!?”

Henry [Muku]: “So it really turned out this way…”

Johnny [Tenma]: “All we do is suffer loss after loss!”

Paul [Kazunari]: “…A party is out of the question. If you loiter around here, I shall capture you too.”

Izumi: (Paul lowers his blade and relaxes his posture…)

Sky [Misumi]: “—HAHA! You’re an interesting lad.” “Paul, was it? Come to me when you grow tired of the navy! I’ll always welcome you as a friend.”

Paul [Kazunari]: “—”

Johnny [Tenma]: “Captain, what’re you thinking inviting the navy!”

Francois [Yuki]: “He’s spouting nonsense again…”

Henry [Muku]: “He has unique taste, or that’s one way to put it.”

Paul [Kazunari]: “…Don’t be mistaken. I am simply repaying my debt for this incident. Now get out of here.”

Johnny [Tenma]: “C’mon, Captain. Let’s get a move on!”

Sky [Misumi]: “’Til we meet again~!”

Izumi: (Paul observes them as they bustle away…)

Paul [Kazunari]: “…The Sky Pirates. I won’t let you off easy the next time we meet.”

-pause-

Kazunari: …

Muku: What are you looking at, Kazu-kun?

Kazunari: Hm? Hehe. I’m egosurfing for everyone’s thoughts on the spin-off~. Like, “the joint battle with Paul and the Sky Pirates hit me in the feels!” or “I wonder if Paul will become their buddy…” There’s so many posts! We popped off!

Muku: Fufu. I’m glad to hear it was well received. What if we do the sequel next?

Kazunari: You said it! Let’s reach for the stars~!

---

previous |

#a3!#a3! translation #miyoshi kazunari #act! addict! actors!

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theinvisiblemuseum · 1 year

Note

how about......people demanding wlw rep then never actually engaging with it because the only thing they care about is woke points☕

this really was the wrong day for me to rb this game because i'm seriously genuinely going to be a major cunt about it and i dgaf. that's your warning.

so. here's what i think. in very general terms.

if you don't want to read below the cut (valid) here's all i'll say: stop, actually. i don't want need or care about the megaviral wlw fanfictions of your dreams, because that's not how i choose to engage with fandoms. i already make and engage with the kind of content i want to see which (surprise!) includes a lot of wlw content, but i don't see the need to force moral superiority down people's throats over it. i don't give two shits if anyone other than me is making wlw content. this is fanfiction. fanart. etc. people are allowed to write or engage with whatever they want, HOWEVER if you're throwing a fit over not having enough wlw content and can't name a woman off the top of ur head, that seems like a you problem, idk. basically i choose to actively NOT engage with the type of people screaming crying and pissing themselves over content that already exists that they can't be bothered to look for because appearances and #feminism are all that matters.

if you're here, i'm going to get more cunty, not sorry, you were warned.

the demand for wlw rep is absolutely just dog whistling to seem holier than thou, and like, whatever, most of this shit originates on twitter and tiktok and i've never listened to a word a twitter or tiktok user has said and i won't start now so on the whole i can just put my metaphorical headphones on and tune it out and keep doing my thing, yk? but when it permeates my little den of horror and my brain starts scratching itself, well, i find that sometimes i need to be an asshole and sometimes is right now.

it's not actually a fandom sexism/misogyny issue it's an issue of wanting validation to enjoy certain things, because those things are only cool if the hivemind says so, right? i'm no political expert but i know enough to know that cultlike thought patterns don't lead anywhere good. i've seen zombie movies. i live in america. LOL.

i always joke about how i'd rather die than have my favorite ships become popular (i.e. pandalily, bartydora, lilycissa, etc) but the reason i say that is because a. it breeds discourse that i don't care about, and b. i don't want a bunch of people engaging with content they're not actually interested in just to seem woke or stay on top of trends. it just makes things worse for the people who actually enjoy it.

and while i have your attention, and while i'm being a bitch, wanna know one of the big reasons i think people are crying and whining about the 'lack of wlw rep'? they want other people to care so they don't have to. of course, they don't realize other people already dooooo care, because they're too terrified to sort by anything other than hits on ao3, but that's neither here nor there. no, what they want is for some big strong heavenly god to bite the bullet and characterize these women that, let's be frank, are names on a page and nothing more, so they don't have to. so they can keep on keeping on with the characters they DO care about and toss something around every once and a while about (insert megaviral wlw fic that doesn't exist) to avoid claims of sexism & lesbophobia. AND AS A DISCLAIMER! i don't think people should feel the need to care about a bunch of random characters if they don't want to. once again, this is fanfiction. do whatever the fuck you want. i promise it makes things so much more fun and chill. just because i wanna characterize the shit out of pandora fucking lovegood, i'd never demand anyone else does, and that's the crux of it, isn't it?

this is why it also bugs me when i see posts like 'omg i don't even care who the ship is, i just love sapphics!' or smth along those lines because like, yeah, i love women and i love when women fuck each other and love each other, but i'm not just gonna care about a ship because it's two women. if i did, i'd be more than happy with the pg spoonfed #girlcore sapphic representation in mass media, because half the time it's just two white girls named rachel and brookleighanna whose only defining character traits are that they're gay. nothing more. and sorry, but i'd rather have no wlw content than that. i can't enjoy a ship if i haven't rotated them to hell and back like a rotisserie chicken in my silly little head, often before i've even consumed any content about them. that's the fun of it! i sent like 12 voice messages about a ship i don't even care about that much one time just because i took a shower and had a lot of thoughts. does that mean i'm going to attempt to make them a cornerstone of the Fandom As A Whole and be treated like a celebrity over it? fuck no. i'm just here because i like to have fun and talk to people about characters we all enjoy and create so much lore in my head that only 2 people will ever know about simply because i'm passionate about it and that passion is really enjoyable to me. fandom is a community to me, not a hierarchy, like tiktok or twitter would have you believe, and i think that's what this whole conversation about wlw rep is missing right from the jump. (ta da! i circled back to the point at hand in the end. my tangent had a point!)

yeah so that's my two cents. lol.

#organ donations #yizyaz #if you read all this sorry #or you're welcome #take your pick

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eliotqueliot · 2 months

Text

Mosaic Haiku, Chapter 7

Welcome! I'm writing a series of haiku about the Mosaic! Disclaimer, I don't own any of these images (they're from the TV series adapted from Lev Grossman's series, The Magicians, which aired on SyFy). I'm just writing about them, ekphrastic style (seeing the image is an important reference when reading the poem, so I wanted to group them together). To read more about the project, the form, my author's notes (including a few more haiku), and to eventually see some sketches I made of these scenes, please visit the page for this chapter at AO3 (link below). I'm going to be rolling out the sketches as I have time, so please stay tuned for the rerelease! Either way, I hope you'll enjoy these reflections on the best episode of TV (The Magicians, Season 3, Episode 5, “A Life in the Day”) and my favorite ship, Quentin Coldwater/Eliot Waugh!

Mosaic Haiku - Chapter 7 - EliotQueliot - The Magicians (TV) [Archive of Our Own]

(Please also find some cool images for "A Life in the Day" at Getty and SyFy.)

---------------------------------

This feeling: magic! Hugging you with all my heart: this joy is our quest.

Quentin

Now, Teddy, don't leave without a hug from us both: some love for the road.

Eliot

These smiles! Holy shit. I'm so lucky. "Hey, Q. Make Teddy laugh challenge."

Quentin

Immortalize this, bitches! Let an artist paint, so future friends know.

Eliot

I'm telling you, Q: Let's take our time, have some fun. The heart has reasons.

Logic alone can't Solve this: Love wins, and you're so good, true, beautiful.

-----------------------

To read all the chapters of Mosaic Haiku on Tumblr or check on which AO3 chapters have sketches posted:

If you'd like to leave comments/kudos, or see the sketches I'm making when they're available, please visit:

#EliotQueliot's Mosaic Haiku #queliot fanpoetry #queliot fanfic #eliot waugh #quentin coldwater #otp: proof of concept #eliot x quentin #quentin x eliot #the mosaic #the magicians 3x05 #the magicians fanfic #the magicians fanpoetry #my fic #my poetry

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our-blood-is-our-ink · 1 year

Text

Hearts Made of Starlight, Love Made of Sunshine

Paper Rings AU

Ship(s): Claire Debella x Agatha Harkness x Reader

Summary: A lighthearted moment takes a sexual turn. (Because these gay bitches are constantly horny.)

Word Count: 10.4k

Disclaimer: 18+ ONLY minors dni

Warnings (not in strict order): fluff, smut, unrealistic sex (do not try at home), use of general pet-names, use of sexual pet-names (kitten, bunny, dove), mistress kink, daddy kink, mommy kink, bondage, spanking, use if vibrators, use of dildos, oral sex (R receiving), squirting, humiliation/degradation kink, praise kink, begging, collars, subspace, overstimulation (implied), aftercare, mentions of titty sucking

A/N: it should be noted that I'm jumping around the Paper Rings timeline. This happens sometime before the events of Paper Rings takes place.

You smile at the sight of Agatha wordlessly passing the tray of freshly made cookies to Claire, luxuriating in their easy companionship.

“Can I have one?” You call out, knowing you're grinning like a sap.

Agatha frowns.

“No, love. They're too hot. Let them cool first.”

You turn your eyes to Claire.

“Don't even think about it, Debella.” Agatha says preemptively as she shuts off the oven.

Claire pouts.

“You're no fun.”

“No fun?” Agatha sounds offended.

“Yes.” Claire states, lifting her chin proudly. “I said what I said.”

Agatha lunges for Claire's phone too fast for her to be able to stop the witch.

“What are you doing?” She demands.

Agatha gives you both a shit eating grin, before changing the lofi music that had been playing softly in the background on the speakers to an entirely ridiculous instrumental piece you don't recognize, but Claire clearly does as her eyes widen in recognition.

Before you could ask why the song could possibly qualify for such a reaction, Agatha breaks down into the stupidest dance you've ever seen.

“Why, Agatha.” Claire moans, bringing her hands up so she could bury her face into them.

You, on the other hand, are startled into howling laughter.

“What the fuck?” You giggle. “Agatha, what the hell?”

“See? I can be fun.” Is all she says.

“Oh my god.” Claire mumbles.

“Join me, Claire!��

“Absolutely not.” Claire drops her hands to glare at Agatha, who's now whirling around the island.

Agatha shrugs.

“Fine, feel left out.”

She tugs on your hands and you follow her, laughing.

Claire looks on in horror.

“There's two of you now.”

You tip your head back and feel the joy of the moment bubbling through you.

“Sure is!”

“Oh god.” Claire groans. “Why?”

“Here, here, here.” Agatha says, stopping in front of the vampire. “You have to show them.”

Claire glares. “No.”

“Yes!”

“No.”

Agatha turns to you.

“Give her the eyes.”

Claire's mouth drops in outrage.

“That's playing dirty!” She protests.

It's not enough to save her from your incredibly well honed puppy eyes.

“Fine!” She gives in. “Just- just stop looking at me all sad and pathetic.”

Immediately you smooth your face out into a happy grin, watching with anticipation as she slides from her seat to stand.

“You owe me.” She says, aiming it at Agatha.

Agatha, who must've picked Claire's phone back up while you were busy committing war crimes against your mate, changes the song to something just as ridiculous.

You burst out laughing, unable to contain your howls of delight as Claire breaks down into a clearly long since choreographed dance with Agatha.

“Oh my god.” You say breathlessly.

Claire's expression just makes the whole thing far funnier than it had any right to be, as she followed Agatha's steps in making utter fools of themselves.

“Oh my god.” You repeat.

“I'll be your god in one moment.” Claire mutters, disgruntled. “And I won't be kind.”

“Someone's grumpy.” Agatha laughs.

Claire stops dancing.

“You know what, Harkness? This goes both ways.”

Agatha frowns.

“What possibly is there th- No. Claire, no.”

But it's too late, because Claire has shut off the music and has grabbed Agatha's waist into her hold.

“Come on… I thought you were fun.” She challenges.

Agatha narrows her eyes.

“Fine.” She accepts.

And to your utter amazement, Agatha allows Claire to lift her up, up, up, suddenly making you extremely glad for the excessively high ceiling.

“Just do it, coward.” Agatha says after a few moments, Claire's arms flexed, showing off her usually hidden muscle.

You shriek when Claire then tosses Agatha, hard enough she nearly grazes the ceiling.

Claire grins, and catches the witch with ease.

“Alright, let me down, you've proven your poOOOOINT- CLAIRE DEBELLA!”

Claire laughs, a sound that's lighthearted and filled with easy joy, as she catches Agatha again.

“Alright, if you insist.”

She gently sets Agatha down, who immediately crosses her arms.

“That.” She says. “Was mean.”

“No.” Claire corrects. “That was fun.”

“It was entertaining, is what that was.” You giggle.

Agatha turns to you.

“Fine then, if you thought that was so entertaining it can be your turn.”

Immediately you stop laughing.

“Uh… No, thanks.” You defer. “I don't like heights.”

“Don't tell me you're a coward.” Agatha taunts.

“That's exactly what I am.” You quickly nod.

“I don't know…” Claire hums, tapping her chin, grinning cheekily. “You did dance with Agatha, it's only fair you do something with me.”

You look between the two older women, darting your eyes back and forth, hoping to find mercy with one of them.

When you don't find any, you sigh.

“I swear, if I get hurt…” You threaten.

“No one's getting hurt.” Claire says in what you're sure she believes to be a reassuring voice.

“Uhuh.” You sarcastically agree.

Agatha only smiles as she hops onto one of the kitchen bar stools as she watches Claire firmly grasp your hips.

You clutch onto her shoulders.

“I really don't like heights. Or being picked up. Or-”

“You'll be fine.” Agatha calls out. “Claire could do this with a fucking kangaroo.”

You turn your head to stare at the witch.

“That's an oddly specific animal.”

“It was a dare.” Claire defends herself.

You look at her in shock.

“I'm sorry, you actually did this with a kangaroo?”

“Mhm.”

And that's right when she tosses you, as you're distracted.

You hardly have anytime to scream before you've landed safely, and oddly not roughly, back into her arms.

“Fucking hell.” You glare. “Warn me.”

“Fine.” Claire shrugs. “Warning.”

“Wha- Claire, noOOOOOOCLAIRE!”

Agatha howls with laughter as you wiggle enough in Claire's grasp that you fall to the floor.

“That was mean.” You whine.

“Oh, but it was entertaining when she did it to me?” Agatha teases.

You pout at her.

“Awww, baby.” She coos.

“Don't call me a pet name, you traitor.” You grumble.

“She was insulting you, doll.” Claire says, reaching a hand down to tousle your hair.

You glare up at her.

“You owe me for that.”

“Oh?” Claire raises an eyebrow. “And what is it that I owe?”

You pretend to consider it before answering.

“Kisses. I want kisses.” You declare.

“Do I owe you kisses as well?” Agatha asks.

You tilt your head in her direction.

“As a matter of fact, yes, you do.”

Claire and Agatha grin at each other.

“Well alright.” The vampire practically purrs. “Where exactly do we owe you these kisses, though?”

You stare up into her blue, blue eyes, and shiver at the golden tone they're taking on.

“Oh.” Your lips part gently.

Agatha laughs again, but more softly this time.

“You should know better than to ask our precious one to do any thinking, Claire.”

Claire turns and looks at Agatha.

Agatha shifts uncomfortably.

“What?” She asks.

“I think you know.” Claire says.

Agatha shifts some more.

Claire steps around you to get closer to Agatha.

“Don't ruin this by being a brat, bunny.” She chides.

Agatha swallows.

You watch with growing arousal as she apologizes.

“Sorry, daddy.” Agatha whispers, her cheeks turning red.

Claire considers her.

“Sorry for what, doll?” She presses. “Look at me when you're talking.”

Agatha meets Claire's eyes, which have now solidly turned into a golden shade.

“I'm sorry for calling you by the wrong name, daddy.” Embarrassment colors her tone. “Little bunnies should know better than to disrespect their daddies.”

“That's right.” Claire coos. “They should.”

“Mistress.” You whine as you watch Claire kiss Agatha hungrily.

“Aw, kitten.” Claire pouts as she pulls away from the other woman. “Did you want your kisses now?”

You nod your head eagerly as you shift from sitting to kneeling.

“Please, mistress. I want you and mommy to make me feel good.”

Claire looks at you fondly, though it does nothing to mask the utter lust in her eyes.

“You're always so good for me, princess. Nothing like my silly bunny.”

“Mommy's good. Sometimes.” You defend.

You feel a wave of affection pulse through you, and you shift your gaze from Claire's eyes to Agatha's.

“Mistress does have a point, sweetheart.” Agatha says condescendingly, a smug look crossing her face. “I enjoy making her life difficult.”

Your eyes widen at the casual admittance.

“Oh, do you, now?” Claire's voice has dropped into her lower register, the sound alone makes you shiver with need.

Agatha, still seated comfortably on the bar stool, juts her chin out proudly.

“You like it when I misbehave.” She smirks. “You like it even more when I make you kneel for me.”

You go still, hardly daring to breathe.

In all the time you've spent together with the two other women, not once has Claire submitted to Agatha.

At least, not that you're aware of.

When Claire makes a threatening step towards Agatha, you shout, “no!” Surprising yourself. It isn't often you put your foot down like this. But you know that look Claire and Agatha are giving each other, the one that says they'll fight for dominance while forcing you to wait. And you don't want to wait. “This is supposed to be about me!”

Two pairs of eyes swing towards you as you stand.

“You agreed you owed me.” You cross your arms as you stand. “And I no longer want the kisses.”

Agatha's brow furrows, as Claire's climbs.

“I didn't realize you had claws, kitten.” Claire comments.

You huff.

“What, did you think I was always the one submitting to Agatha?”

Claire tilts her head as Agatha's cheeks turn red again.

“I never considered it.” The vampire admits. “I thought you were a sub.”

You shrug.

“Sometimes I enjoy dominating.”

Agatha scoffs as she stands.

“You mean rarely. I can count on both hands the amount of times I submitted to you.”

“And I'm sure you'll remember that every single one of them had you begging for me to do it more often, bunny.” You challenge.

Agatha looks away from the impromptu staring contest.

“Hm.” Claire hums. “I'm intrigued.”

Agatha turns to glare at her.

“Oh, so are you going to make me kneel for them, then?”

You laugh.

“I don't need daddy's help with that.”

You reach out mentally, and give the bond a sharp tug, and Agatha stumbles forward.

She scowls and tugs back.

You smile, not moving an inch.

“Aw, would you look at that.” You coo. “You really want this.”

“I do not!” Agatha protests, but she's betrayed by the arousal you can vaguely feel from the bond, throbbing through her.

“Then prove it.” You dare her. “Make me kneel instead.”

She growls, and tugs at the bond again.

You merely tilt your head in Claire's direction.

“Why don't you show her how good little ones behave, mistress?” You ask.

An invitation, not a demand.

Claire glances between you and Agatha, before letting a slow smile spread across her face, elegantly dropping to her knees.

“There's a good girl.” You praise, stepping towards the vampire. You reach your hand down and rest it against her cheek. “Are you going to continue to be good for your kitten tonight?”

Claire turns her head and kisses the palm of your hand.

“Just for tonight. Don't expect me to do this again.” Claire warns.

You nod.

“I wouldn't dream of it.”

You step away, and smile at Agatha.

“Since you insist on being a brat, I'll treat you like one.”

She rolls her eyes. “Please.”

You lean in to whisper into her ear.

“If you insist.”

You suppress a grin at how you can tell Agatha's body shivers.

“Claire, darling, would you like to tie our misbehaving bunny up for me?”

Again, an invitation.

But this time, with more risk.

She considers you.

“Tonight only.” She stresses.

You nod in acknowledgement. “Thank you, mistress.”

She stands, and glares at Agatha.

“Kneel.”

You shiver at her tone, and have to resist the urge to follow Agatha onto your knees.

Technically Claire enthralling Agatha would be considered cheating if she didn't enjoy being held under it so much.

“Safe word if you really don't want this.” The older woman mummers.

When Agatha says nothing, she nods at you.

“Be a good pet, and crawl to the bedroom, bunny.” You order.

Agatha looks up at you, pupils blown wide with want, and it sends a throb of arousal straight to your aching pussy.

“Go on.” You encourage.

Agatha starts hesitantly until Claire smacks her ass, and that gets her moving.

“God, that ass.” You comment quietly to Claire, watching Agatha head toward the main bedroom.

“Why do you think I enjoy fucking it so much?” It's a rhetorical question, and you exchange a smile with her.

“Be a good pet for me, too, mistress.” You say.

Claire presses a light kiss to your cheek, before obeying instructions, wiggling her own ass in a clear invitation.

You laugh softly as you smack it, and you're fairly certain Claire bites back a moan, clearly not having expected you to know to do it firmly.

You follow, leaning against the doorframe as you watch Claire gather the materials she wants to use to tie Agatha up with.

“Tie her to the chair.” You call to her. “If she wants to be a brat, she can watch as you pleasure me with a vibe stuffed inside that greedy cunt of hers.”

Agatha whines from where she's kneeling at the foot of the bed.

Claire pauses before blinking at you.

“What?” You raise an eyebrow. “I've had my fair share of punishments. I know what they should look like.”

“I wouldn't have pegged you for a hard dom.” She comments.

You grin. “I can contain multitudes. Unless you rather I treat you roughly? Hm? Do you want that from me tonight, Claire? Do you want your perfect little angel to ruin you?”

Claire looks dumbstruck.

You laugh.

“Be good, and finish tying up our brat.”

Claire swallows.

“Yes, ma'am.” She obeys.

Your whole body feels suddenly alight. You never thought you could be so turned on from a simple title.

You watch, distracted from where you had started looking through one of the toy drawers you keep, as Claire directs Agatha to give you both a show as she undresses.

“Tease her tits.” You find yourself saying when Agatha's bra comes off, revealing her ample chest. “I want to see them all bruised and prettied up for me.”

The moan that leaves the witch's mouth as Claire's finds its place against Agatha's flesh is obscene.

“Is this why you were being such a fucking brat?” You wonder. “Did you just need someone to touch you?”

“Yes!” Agatha cries out as Claire bites down. “I need it!”

You roll your eyes.

“Pathetic.” You degrade. “I didn't realize you were such an attention whore.”

You wait a few more moments, waiting for Claire to switch sides, and just before she can enclose her mouth around the nipple that has yet to be lavished with her tender ministrations, you command her.

“Stop.”

Instantly, the vampire freezes, as Agatha lets out a string of protests.

“Good girl.” You praise Claire, who visibly preens at the two words.

“And you.” You snap in Agatha's direction. “Do I need to gag you in addition to having your daddy tie you up?”

Her eyes widen, and she quickly shakes her head.

“Then shut up.” You order coldly.

Claire groans at your tone, and it causes you to turn from Agatha in order to study her face, before you break out in laughter.

“Aw, mistress.” You tease. “I didn't realize you enjoyed being so subservient.”

Her mouth opens, and you can clearly tell she's about to deny your words, when you swiftly shove your fingers down her throat.

“I wouldn't ruin being such a well behaved pet for myself, if I were you.” You softly warn.

Claire's gagging, and you let her continue for a few seconds longer before removing your now wet fingers, wiping them dry against her face.

A small whine emits from the back of her throat.

“Tie her up.”

As Claire scrambles to obey, you find the vibrator you want to stuff Agatha's already dripping hole with, carefully lubing it up.

You can feel your pussy pulsing, can feel how wildly turned on you are.

You can also feel, albeit more distantly than your own, Agatha's arousal, how it courses through her as if it were some sort of holy fire cleansing her.

“Undress and wait for me on the bed.” You tell Claire, once she finishes doing as you asked.

You focus on Agatha, not worried about the other woman.

“Now, bunny.” You say sweetly. “How do we ask to be punished?”

When she bows her head to allow her hair to curtain in front of her face, you make a disproving sound.

“Ah, ah, ah. Look at me, mommy.” You grip her chin and jerk her head up so that her eyes meet your own, before dropping your hold so she can speak.

Agatha's jaw works, clenching and unclenching.

“If you can't answer me, I won't be nice.” You warn. “You want to cum tonight, don't you?”

Agatha stares at you in horror.

“You wouldn't.” She rasps out, arousal clear in her voice.

You frown slightly, before smacking her across the face.

“Try again.”

She blinks the tears in her eyes away.

“Please punish me, ma'am.” She pleads. “I need to be put in my place.”

You hear a moan from behind you, and you quickly take a glance to find Claire spread out on the bed, fingers lightly dancing across her body, but not touching anything vital without your permission.

You refocus on Agatha.

“What happens to brats that cum without permission?” You demand.

The witch bites her lip, thinking, before responding.

“Edging.” She decides on.

“Wrong.” You softly say. “They get overstimulated until they have tears streaming down their pretty cheeks and their pussies are all puffy and swollen.”

Her moan is music to your ears.

“Now stay still, mommy.” You order her. “Your little one is going to put this in you.”

Agatha breathes sharply inward as you slowly start pushing the vibrator in, watching with fascination as her greedy hole swallows the rounded parts.

“You can turn it on.” You call out to Claire, not taking your eyes off the little bit you can still see poking out from where Agatha is now stretched around the vibe.

As soon as Claire turns it on, Agatha gasps, crying out as her eyes screw shut.

“Remember.” You whisper in her ear. “You are not allowed to cum until I say so.”

You then turn and walk towards Claire, ignoring the writhing witch behind you.

“I think someone deserves a reward for being such a good role model.” You comment as you crawl to hover over Claire. “But first, how would you like to get me out of these clothes, hm?”

Her eyes flash, and you barely have time to register it before you've been flipped over and your clothes are being ripped from your body.

“Claire.”

You aren't certain if it's a reprimand or if it's encouragement, but your mate certainly takes it as the latter, using her teeth to tear your panties off of you, as her hands do the same with your bra, and you can't help the moan that finds its way out of your mouth.

“Let me make you feel good.” She growls, nuzzling at your neck, having made her way back up. “Reward me by letting me eat you out until you can't do anything other than scream.”

You reach a hand and tangle it into her hair, tugging at it until she removes her face from where it's buried in your neck to right above yours.

“Are you certain that's what you want? I can't promise that you'll cum tonight if that's what you wish for your reward to be.” You say, searching her eyes.

They're no longer solidly gold, nor are they wholly blue, but are somewhere in between, and makes you throb with need.

“Yes.” Claire begs. “Please, ma'am. Let mistress make you feel good.”

And oh, if that doesn't fill you with lust, if it doesn't make you feel utterly alight, nothing does.

“Go on then.” You breathe out.

Claire's grin is feral, and she kisses you hard.

“Thank you, ma'am.” She's careful to say as she pulls away.

You guide her head down, down, down, while fully opening up your bond with Agatha, allowing her to feel Claire's hot breath against your core as if it were on her own, and she loudly moans as the chair rocks from her attempting to buck her hips.

You can feel how the vibrator deep inside her is causing her to gush around it, can feel how sweat beads her skin, and you would laugh at how helpless she is if Claire didn't pick that moment to short circuit you by burying her tongue deep into your already soaking wet cunt.

“Oh fuck, Claire!” You shout, arching your back, yanking harshly at her hair.

She moans, and the vibrations make you feel lit aflame.

“Ma'am!” You hear Agatha cry out. “I'm gonna cum!”

You can hardly think, but you still manage to snap out, “don’t you fucking dare, you fucking slut.”

“Please!” Agatha begs. “Please, I can't- I can't help it!”

“If you fucking cum without my fucking permission I'll turn you over my lap an- FUCK!” You cut yourself off as Claire sucks your clit into her mouth. “Fuck! Yes, just like tha- SHIT! You're going to make me cum, make your kitten fucking c-cum! I- Oh, oh! FUCK, mistress, don't stop, don't stop, don't fucking- YES! Right there! Right there! You're gonna make me cum I'm gonna fucking cum, I- O-Oh, f-fuck! Fu-fu-fuck! Oh fu- CLAIRE!” You scream your orgasm out, riding your high as you clench around nothing, Claire's tongue occupied by flicking your clit, over and over and over again.

You don't think you've ever peaked faster, and you ride out the waves of pleasure crashing down on you, grinding your hips against Claire.

There's ringing in your ears, but isn't it enough to cover Agatha's own cries of pleasure, and you can feel anticipation coursing through you.

You give yourself a few moments, violently jerking Claire away from your now sopping wet core, where she had started to lick at you again, clearly determined to make you cum a second time.

She whines, and you grip her hair tighter.

“The brat fucking came.” You hiss out breathlessly.

Your hand is jerked backwards as Claire snaps her head up to stare at Agatha, and she growls low in her throat.

Your eyes are still closed, but they don't need to be open for a few more moments yet.

“Untie her. Don't stop the vibrator. Let her stumble her way to me. Get out one of the paddles. And then be good and lick her mess clean.”

You release your hold on Claire's hair, and she moves so quickly she creates a small rush of cool air.

Agatha begs as Claire does as you instructed, hoping for mercy, but doesn't get a response from either of you.

You feel the bed dip and open your eyes, scooting backwards so you're sitting up against the headboard.

Agatha's flushed red, from her ears all the way down to her chest, which has started to show the bruises Claire had inflicted on her earlier.

“Over my lap, bunny.” You command her.

Her legs tremble as the vibrator continues to overstimulate her, making her collapse a few times on the soft surface of the blankets before picking herself back up and continuing to make her way towards you.

Agatha is only half way to you when Claire passes you one of the smaller paddles.

You raise a single eyebrow.

“You really want her to hurt, don't you?”

“She enjoys it.” The vampire shrugs.

You tilt your head, eyes still on Agatha.

“I'll bet. I'll also bet you're hoping I'll let you fuck yourself, aren't you?”

You don't need to see Claire's face to know it's colored slightly.

Agatha finally reaches you, situating herself so that her ass rests comfortably across your lap as she spreads her body out.

Her thighs glisten, and you run two fingers through it, feeling the wetness.

“Since you want to stuff that pretty pussy of yours so badly, you can warm a dildo on the floor.”

Claire lets out a noise of protest.

“Ma'am, please. I was so good for you.”

Now you do turn to look at her, Agatha wiggling slightly as you absentmindedly tease her smallest hole with the fingers coated in her essence.

“You were.” You pause, watching as Claire's face falls, as she realizes you're not going to give in. “And now you're ruining it.”

A thrill runs through you as this powerful woman bows her head in submission to you.

“I'm sorry, ma'am. I'll be good.”

You hum in approval while suddenly giving Agatha a sharp smack across her ass when she whined.

“Quiet, brat.” You snap.

There's a faint whimper, but she does keep silent.

“Get out the red and black one.” You tell Claire. “If you can prove you can continue to be good after our bunny takes her punishment, I'll have her fuck you with it.”

“Thank you, ma'am.” She's eager, and you laugh a little at it.

Really, you should take control more often, you muse. You forget how much you enjoy it.

You turn your attention back to the witch that's draped over your lap, grasping at the paddle that rests besides you.

“Don't think you're not going to be overstimulated tonight.” You warn her.

You don't get a response, and you realize Agatha's trying to be good.

You smirk, and hear Claire groan, having situated herself kneeling on the floor with her hole stuffed full with one of the largest dildos the three of you own.

“There's my good girls.” You coo. “See, it isn't so hard to listen.”

That's when you bring the paddle down on Agatha, who yelps at the sudden sting.

“How many was that, mommy?” You ask condescendingly.

“One.” She whispers.

“Keep count, then. Otherwise I might have to start over. We'll go to ten, alright, little one?”

You can't help the term of endearment as it slips off your tongue, can't help the shared love and adoration that you and Agatha hold for each other from rolling through the bond.

It makes her moan, and you don't chide her for it, only swinging the paddle again.

“Two.” Already her voice holds more arousal than pain, and Claire groans again as you feel your breath catch.

“Ma'am.” Claire stops you from hitting Agatha again. “Ma'am, spank her pussy.”

You slowly turn your head, well adjusted now to the feeling of power you hold over your partner that you'd never have dreamed would be so submissive to you.

“Was that an order?” You ask, careful to be neutral.

Immediately, her eyes widen.

“No. No. I'm sorry, ma'am. Please spank her pussy, ma'am.”

You nod in satisfaction, before doing exactly as she asked.

Agatha's moan is filthy, and you watch in awe as a gush of her essence drips out from her weeping cunt.

“Th-th-three.” She stutters.

You spank her pussy again, and she practically screams, and you realize that she's cumming.

“You dirty fucking slut.” You laugh disbelievingly.

“I told you, ma'am.” Claire says, sounding breathless. “She’s such a cute whore when her pussy gets spanked.”

“You know, dove.” You casually comment. “I haven't heard her count yet. I think I've lost my place. Would you like to correct her?”

Claire looks so eager, and it makes you throb.

“Yes, please.”

You smile at the vampire as Agatha continues to rut against you, evidently still riding out the last of her orgasm.

“Hm…” You hum. “I'll let. As long as you put on a pretty show for me first.”

The effect of your words are instantaneous, and Claire immediately starts bouncing on the synthetic cock that's buried deep in her pussy, her moans echoing around the room.

You tap Agatha right where her spine dips into the swell of her ass.

“Watch.” You whisper, and she obediently picks up her head from where it was resting on the bed, moaning far more softly than Claire at the sight of her mate pleasuring herself.

“Oh, fuck.” The vampire groans, throwing her head back. “Fuck. Kitten.”

You let out a groan of your own at the sound of Claire begging for you.

“Touch yourself.”

It's hardly louder than a breath, but Claire hears it all the same, her enhanced hearing a gift, and her hand wanders down so she can circle at her clit.

It's awkward, until the older woman clearly decides it'll be easier to lay back, using a hand to force the dildo off from where it had been suctioned to the hardwood floors, spreading her legs so that you can perfectly see the speed at which she brutally fucks herself.

Agatha whines, and you gently reach a hand out to stroke at her hair.

“I know, she is so pretty being a good little slut for me, isn't she, mommy? You like watching daddy make herself cum, don't you?”

The witch whines again, and you gently tug at a strand of hair.

“Maybe she'll cum faster if you encourage her to.”

All you get is a moan in return, and you have to laugh.

“Oh, little one, has my pretty baby’s brain gone so dumb she can't even talk?”

Agatha whimpers, just as Claire's moan goes high pitched before cutting off, making you groan with lust as you watch as she cums hard around the dildo she has buried deep into herself.

Idly, you use your unoccupied hand to grab a handful of Agatha's ass and squeeze.

She makes an odd sound in the back of her throat and wiggles.

“Hush.” You chide. “Only good bunnies get to speak.”

Agatha makes the sound again as Claire gently pulls the fake dick out of herself, giving you a view of how she gapes, clenching around nothing.

“Daddy!” The witch in your lap gasps. “Daddy!”

Lazily, Claire sits up, and gives a grin that seems a little loopy.

Clearly, it had been one of her more powerful orgasms.

“Brat.” Claire laughs, even as she pants, trying to catch her breath. “You just can't help yourself, even all stupid and dumb for our kitten.”

You can't properly see Agatha's face, but you can easily picture how the humiliation causes her face to flush a darker shade of red.

“Come here, mistress.” You say. “I'll bet she's just desperate for you to spank her pretty little cunt all black and blue.”

The vampire stands on shaky legs.

“I want to put a collar on her first.”

You meet Claire's gaze, note how they shimmer between shades of blue and gold, before you concede.

“Please, collar me too, mistress.” You beg, and you swear you could see how her pupils blow up to twice their previous size.

“Alright, kitten.”

But she doesn't head to the closet, where you keep the big box of the collars you bulk order. Instead, she walks over to the bed, where you and Agatha await her.

She leans down and kisses you hard, and you moan into it, opening your mouth to give her access, to allow her to lick into you, and she practically fucks your mouth with her tongue.

When she pulls away, you feel lightheaded.

“You did such a good job, princess.” She whispers. “So I'll let you continue to tell me what's going to happen, as long as you understand that it won't be this way for the whole night.”

Your eyes are wide, almost comically so as you nod your head.

“Thank you, mistress.”

Claire smirks.

“Well, I do owe you, don't I? Besides, you've earned it.”

You beam happily up at her, warmth flooding you.

That's when Agatha decides she's had enough of being ignored, huffing loudly.

“Not fair.” She complains.

You and Claire share a look, before she slips off for the closet.

“You know what's not fair, brat?” You ask. “You being such a fucking attention slut. You need to learn that not everything is about you.”

Heaven help you, you can tell she's pouting.

You don't even need the bond to tell you that.

“You're going to take your punishment like a good girl, and not like the bad bunny you've been.” You state. “You're going to let daddy spank you until she feels you've learned your lesson, and then your kitten is going to overstimulate you until you're begging her to let you stop cumming.” You yank Agatha's head up by her hair, making her look straight at Claire, who's dangling two disposable collars from her fingertips. “And you know what we're going to do as you beg? We're going to ignore you. Daddy is going to make me feel so, so good, because that's what I've been for her. A good girl. While you, the bad brat, will only get to feel the vibrator that I stuffed inside your pathetic little hole. And then only after mistress makes me pass out will she maybe take the strap and fuck your mouth with it, since you can't seem to keep yourself quiet without any help.”

Claire's throaty laugh causes you to look back up at her, having focused on talking down at Agatha.

“You're adorable, doll.” She says. “Such big talk for someone who's usually so quick to kneel.”

“I have to take my chances where I can get them then, don't I?”

Claire hums in agreement.

“Let go of her.” She orders.

You detangle your fingers from Agatha's hair, and the witch's head drops, before Claire lifts it up with a single finger.

“Keep it still.”

You brush the curtain of soft curls aside, allowing Claire easy access to Agatha's neck as she tightens the collar.

“That okay, mommy?” You ask softly.

“Feels good.” Agatha agrees, and your head is suddenly spinning with the rush of emptiness that she shares with you through the bond.

You hardly register Claire manipulating your own body so that she can collar you, just that it furthers the subspace you were abruptly thrown into.

The vampire presses a soft kiss to the top of your head.

“You can't stay in charge and tell me what our bunny gets if you can't think, princess.” Her voice is also soft, and you blink, lazily making eye contact with her.

She smiles, and her eyes pull you in.

“Wake up.” Her words are smothered in the honey of enthrallment, and just as swiftly as Agatha pulled you into subspace, Claire snaps you out of it.

You whine at its loss.

“Aw, but I did make you a promise, kitten.” Claire fake pouts.

You half heartedly glare at her.

“Maybe I should make you wear a collar too.”

Something in Claire stills, even as her breath audibly quickens.

“Oh, dove.” You coo. “Did you want to feel owned?”

Instantly Claire shakes her head, a brief flash of panic crosses her face.

“Nobody owns me. Nobody.”

Agatha shifts from her position on your lap.

“She doesn't like the concept of being owned.” Comes her rough voice. “Like I don't enjoy things on my wrists.”

You feel your heart drop to your stomach.

If Agatha phrased it like that, it means it's tied to something traumatic, something big if it was enough to pierce through the subspace she's in and allow her to find words that aren't monosyllabic to speak with.

“I'm so sorry, Claire.” You immediately feel horrified, guilty. “I didn't- I hadn't known.”

The older woman shakes her head again.

“It's- Well it's not okay but it's- it's fine because you didn't know. I know you didn't. Just.” She fidgets with her fingers. “There’s a reason why I hardly ever…”

“Off.” You quietly tell Agatha, who immediately sits up and wiggles some space between the two of you, patting the empty part of the bed.

Claire climbs on, and you somehow manage to remember the vibe still going in Agatha, and reach for the remote to shut it off.

The witch can't help her moan of relief, immediately moving to pull it out the second it's turned off, and it makes Claire give her a small smile as the both of you curl into her sides.

“Sorry to ruin the mood.” She whispers.

“Don't be.” You assure her. “We have forever to continue. The most important thing is everyone's comfortability.”

Agatha hums in agreement, and you smile as her head finds Claire's lap.

Clearly, the raven haired woman has slipped back into her relatively nonverbal headspace.

Claire pulls you closer to her, and you find your own head resting comfortably tucked against her.

“We'll continue in a little bit. I just need a few moments.” The vampire says.

“We don't have to.” You tell her.

“I know. I want to.” She assures you, one of her hands finding a place in your hair, toying with it.

You sigh in contentment as you feel your guilt lift. Claire wouldn't want you so close if she was upset with you.

You shut your eyes, wanting to enjoy the calm.

“Don't fall asleep on me, you two.” Claire sounds amused, and it further assuages your bad feelings.

“We'll try. But you're very cozy, Claire bear.” You mummer, eyes still closed.

“You'll try, you mean.” Claire still sounds amused. “Agatha's fallen right asleep.”

You laugh softly.

“Of course she did.”

“She's so cute like this.” The vampire’s tone suddenly shifts to something sadder. “Sometimes I wish she felt the way she looks when she sleeps.”

Your eyes pop open and you angle yourself so you're able to look at Claire.

“What do you mean?”

The other woman shakes her head.

“Nevermind.”

“Claire…”

She sighs.

“I just don't think she ever feels peaceful.” Claire quietly admits. “I don't think she ever…” She shakes her head again. “I'm psychoanalyzing Agatha to avoid thinking about my own problems.”

She gives you a wry grin.

“I probably shouldn't do that.”

You shrug.

“I’m probably just projecting.” Claire runs her free hand through her hair.

“Perhaps.” You close your eyes again. “But I do think you're right. I don't get the sense…” You hesitate, before pushing forward. “I don't think she's at peace with herself.”

“Are any of us?”

The question hovers in the air, an admittance, one that carries a heavy weight.

One you can't answer, not honestly.

“Maybe sleep is a good idea.” You purposefully yawn, deflecting.

Claire's arm loosens around you for a brief moment before tightening again.

“Maybe you're right.” She agrees.

And for a long time after, it's silent except for the soft sounds of gentle breathing, and you float untethered in comforting darkness.

And then suddenly you hear Claire and Agatha furiously whispering back and forth, Agatha sounding increasingly upset, while Claire sounds on the verge of tears.

“I said I don't want to talk about it.”

“Oh, but you want to cry about it?”

“Fuck off, Agatha.”

“No! This is clearly upsetting you more than you want me to know, and that's bothering me! You're always telling me to be honest.”

“That's different.”

“Fucking how, Claire?” And then, more softly, gently, “I'm not doing any of this to hurt you. But you're being so insistent that you're okay, when you're clearly not. And I don't appreciate that you thought I'd be okay with continuing to have sex when you're obviously not in a good headspace to consent to it.”

Claire's quiet.

Agatha is too, and you can feel how her concern fills up the room.

You purposefully stir, making a show of waking up.

You doubt either of your partners buy it, but it allows them to pretend their argument never happened.

“How long was I asleep?” You ask, your throat feeling rough.

“Not for very long.” Claire's voice sounds weak.

You won't embarrass her by looking to see if she's crying.

“Claire says you fell asleep almost as soon as I did, so it's probably been an hour.” Agatha says.

“Oh.”

The silence is stifling now, and you choose to burrow deeper into Claire's side.

The bed shifts a little.

“Where are you going?”

“I'll be right back. I promise.” Agatha assures Claire.

You can hear her bare feet pad across the floor and out of the room.

You break the silence after a few moments. “I'm sorry, you know.”

Claire doesn't answer, just puts her arm back around you and squeezes.

You were wrong before, Claire is upset with you.

She just doesn't want to talk about it.

You can feel tears pricking behind your eyelids.

You will not cry. You will not.

That wouldn't be fair to your mate, to make this about you.

“I remembered the cookies.” Agatha's voice floats across the room. “I figured it might be nice to see how they came out.”

Claire's arm drops as you move to sit up.

Agatha briefly frowns in your direction, but then quickly smiles.

“Cookies!” She insists. “Who can be sad in the face of chocolate?”

Claire makes a strangled sound in the back of her throat while you laugh in disbelief.

And then Agatha takes a cookie off the plate she's holding and throws it at your head.

“Ow! What was that?” You demand.

“You're both too sad.” She replies, nodding to herself. She throws a second cookie at Claire, who just blinks at it as it falls short, landing in her lap instead of against her forehead.

“Agatha…” She sighs.

“Eat the cookies! Go on. I worked so hard on them.”

You and Claire exchange a look that says is she serious?

“This is a really poor attempt to cheer up the mood.” You mutter.

“I don't know, maybe she's trying to make it worse on purpose.”

“I am right here.” Agatha glares at the pair of you. “Now eat.”

“Maybe she just has a fetish.” Claire offers.

You shudder. “Nope. No. That just. No. Ick. Ew.”

Claire flicks your shoulder.

“Some of the things we do used to be considered fetishes. Some of the things you specifically do can still be considered fetishes.”

You immediately know what she's talking about.

“Don't come for my kinks, that's so rude of you.”

“You two are impossible.” Agatha pouts, cutting off whatever Claire was about to say. “I thought you both wanted cookies.”

You glance down at the cookie in your hand, then back up to look at the witch, before throwing it back at her.

Evidently Claire had the same idea, because two flying projectiles smack Agatha, one in the face, and the other on one of her tits.

You and Claire burst out laughing.

“You guys are bullies.” Agatha whines. “I try to be nice and all I get in return is the two of you being mean to me. Well fine then, you don't have to have my cookies.”

Clearly your partner didn't think that through, because at the threat of no cookies, you and Claire immediately launch yourselves at her, flying off of the bed and tackling her to the floor.

“Don't be mean back. Haven't you ever heard of being the bigger person?” Claire asks.

“Yeah, Atha, don't bully your bullies back, that won't end well for you.”

“You just wasted at least a dozen of them.” She points out, voice muffled from her position on the bottom of the impromptu dog pile.

You look at Claire in exaggerated horror.

“Oh, no!” She mocks.

“We’ll have to make another batch!” You join.

“You're so mean.” Agatha reiterates. “What did I ever do to deserve such cruel treatment?”

Without missing a beat, Claire casually replies, “not walking around naked often enough.”

You turn your head as much as you're able in the tangle of limbs to stare at the vampire in shock.

“You're a nudist?” You ask, incredulous.

She has the audacity to blush.

“How have you not figured that out until now?” Agatha wonders.

“I am not.” Claire defends herself. “I just happen to think Agatha should be.”

“Claire!” You giggle, scandalized.

“I also happen to think you should be one too.” She adds on.

Agatha snorts. “You just want us to be easily accessible for you.”

“What, like we aren't already? Did you know I started bulk ordering my favorite clothes because she keeps tearing them off of me? I use her credit cards too. If she can ruin them, she can pay for the damages.”

Claire makes a shocked noise. “You're betraying me! Don't team up against me with Agatha, that's what we're supposed to do against her!”

“That's so smart.” Agatha replies. “I should do that.”

It occurs to you, “...are we her sugar babies?”

Claire gasps in outrage as Agatha yells her deniance.

“Absolutely not! I pay for my own shit!”

“I am not a sugar mommy!”

And suddenly you can't stop laughing, can't stop howling over your partners extreme dislike of the suggestion.

“You're right, you're right.” You soothe between gasps for air. “Agatha's the sugar mommy. You're the sugar daddy.”

You dissolve back into full body laughter, shaking with it as you crack up.

You can't do much as Claire scoops you up and tosses you on the bed, and you can't do much as Agatha joins her in crawling to share space hovering over you.

It does, however, send you into further hysterics, because they just look like two very curious cats examining a new plaything.

Oh.

You sober very quickly.

“Uh… What are you doing..?” You hesitantly ask.

“Well since apparently we're your mommy and daddy.” Claire leans her head down so her mouth is close to your ear. “Don't you think it's our right to make our baby feel good?”

You shiver, and lick your lips.

“I-I thought that-”

“Thought what, kitten?” Agatha silkenly asks. “Don’t you know better then to think? Our little one is far too precious to hurt themselves thinking.”

You swallow as heat suddenly grows in the pit of your stomach.

“It's just… Are we all okay to do this?”

You need to check. You have to.

Claire looks at you fondly.

“Yes, love. I'm okay now. I promise.”

Agatha gives her a long glance, but tilts her head, acquiescing.

You let out a breath.

“Do you want us to make you feel good?” Agatha asks.

You nod your head.

“Please, mommy. I want you and mistress to make your baby scream for you.”

Claire chuckles throatily. “Well, doll, we're certainly happy to. After all, isn't that a mommy and daddy's job?”

You frown up at Claire.

“Do you want me to call you daddy?”

She laughs again.

“Just for right now, princess.”

“Mommy wants to hear you say it.” Agatha whispers in your ear. “Say how much you want daddy to fuck you stupid.”

“Please.” You sound so desperate, even to your own ears. “I want daddy to ruin her precious baby for mommy. Please, please, fuck me dumb.”

“Oh, kitten.” Claire coos. “You sound so pretty when you beg.”

“I wanna feel you.” You whine. “Please, mistress.”

Agatha chuckles low in her throat.

“Let her up, daddy.” She says to Claire. “I can hold her still while you make them scream our names.”

You whine again. “I'll be so good, please.”

“Please, who, little one?” The vampire's eyes never left your own.

“Please, daddy.” You obey. “I want you to touch me.”

At that, Claire shifts, allowing you the space to get up and move, and you crawl into Agatha's lap, turning around in it, so that your back is pressed against her chest.

“Such a good kitten for us.” The raven haired woman praises. “Now spread your legs for daddy. Show her what a slut you are.”

You can feel heat rising to your cheeks as humiliation swirls through you, but you're good and listen.

Claire's eye's burn against where they've latched on to your wet center.

“Oh, kitten.” She breathes out. “You're dripping.”

Agatha's fingers dance their way down your sides, as Claire remains fixated on how you clench around nothing, her nose flaring as she inhales your scent.

“Hold her still, Agatha.”

At those four simple words, the witch's fingers stop what they're doing as she encloses you in her arms, a light buzz of magic washing over your skin, stimulating you, and you can't help the moan that makes its way out of you.

And then suddenly Claire’s mouth is all over you, and you shiver as you feel her fangs graze the skin of your inner thighs.

If her fangs are out that means the night will end with her feeding from you, and the very thought of it is nearly enough to make you cum in the spot as your entire body is overtaken with arousal.

“Fuck, daddy.” Agatha groans behind you as the vampire gently bites and sucks at the soft skin. “You're already making her all empty-headed.”

“Good.” Claire chuckles, and you whimper at how it vibrates against you. “Maybe I can make you both cum without even having to touch you, bunny.”

You hear a thunk, and know that Agatha must have thrown her head back against the headboard at the suggestion.

That's when you feel Claire's tongue start to gently lap at you, and you try to buck your hips closer to the source of the thing bringing you pleasure, but between the vampire's strong hands, and Agatha's magic, you find yourself utterly immobile.

“Mistress.” You whimper.

She sharply slaps your thigh and you cry out, not from the pain, but from the suddenness of it.

Agatha's breath is hot against your ear as she whispers, “you have to call her daddy, angel. You were mean to her, and you don't get to call her mistress until you've proven you can be her good pet again.”

You choke on a sob as Claire briefly sucks your clit into her mouth before going back to licking teasingly at you.

“Daddy!” Your voice hitches.

“Silly slut.” Agatha pants in your ear. “If you can't keep yourself quiet, I'll just have to make you.”

When blackened digits press against your mouth, you readily accept them, allowing Agatha to thrust them in and out, causing you to gag a little around them.

“Fuck.” The witch groans as Claire scraps her teeth gently over your bundle of nerves. “You're such a perfect little whore for mommy and daddy, kitten.”

You whine around the fingers in your mouth, and drool dribbles out from around them.

“You're so messy, too.” Agatha's magic is enough to keep you in your place, and her other hand comes around to lightly press against the front of your throat, reminding you of the collar you're wearing as she causes it to dig a little into your skin. “Such a filthy fucking whore.”

Words are far too difficult to use as Claire's tongue finally, finally buries itself into your gushing hole, and both your partners moan as you scream with pleasure, a wordless, high pitched sound that tapers off into whimpers, clearly heard despite Agatha's fingers occupying your mouth.

Claire's tongue is driving you wild as you attempt to toss your head every which way, unable to move your body properly due to how tightly Claire and Agatha are holding you in place, a constant series of whines emitting from the back of your throat, despite how deep Agatha is shoving her fingers into you.

And then your mate says something right against your core, right as Agatha's mouth latches onto where your neck and shoulder meet, and you're gone, careening over the edge into utter ecstasy.

It's pure bliss, the pleasure that courses through you, so much so that you aren't aware of your own body, just the buzzing in your ears and the sensation of your orgasm ripping through you.

Your high doesn't fade, it only grows, and black spots dance in your vision as you suddenly become aware of just how loudly you're screaming, crying out your lovers names over and over like a holy mantra, and the heat in the pit of your belly fully snaps, and warmth races through you.

And then you feel it splashing against your thighs, dripping down and soaking the sheets below you, and heat rushes up to your cheeks as you realize you've squirted.

You neck aches, but you can't find it in yourself to lift it up from where it's thrown back, your ears ringing, and you blink the black spots out of your vision, though it only blurs, as Claire continues to gently lick at you, making you whimper as jolts of arousal cause your body to jerk around.

Agatha has a tight grip on your sides, and you're sure it'll bruise later, while you slowly start to become aware of how heavily she's panting as the noise in your ears fade.

“Daddy, stop.” You whine. “‘M so sen’ive”

Somehow Agatha's grip on you becomes stronger “Don't, don't fucking stop, I'm so close.” She hisses.

But it's not her body that's being pleasured, it's yours, and you groan as Claire lifts her face up, your wetness covering her.

You whimper at the sight, and you can feel a renewed rush of arousal pulse through you.

“‘S’okay.” You get out. “Want mommy to feel good.”

“Such a sweet kitten.” The vampire coos. “Are you sure?”

You nod as your eyes flutter close.

“Make her cum.” You insist.

Agatha's head buries itself against your neck.

“Thank you, baby.” She whispers against you. “So good for me, so good for your mommy.”

Claire waits, just a for a few more seconds before readjusting herself, laying back down on her stomach so she can continue to eat you out.

Instantly your throw your head back again, and it takes less than a minute for tears of pleasure to start rolling down the sides of your face as you desperately try to withstand this unique torture for as long as possible, wanting to hold off your impending orgasm so that Agatha's can properly build up.

You can feel how her own wetness drips out of her, can feel the warmth of it from how closely she has you pressed against her, and she starts frantically bucking her hips, searching for friction, and in the process rutting herself against your backside.

“Fuck!” You hear her cry out. “I need you in me, daddy!”

Your breath catches in a soundless scream as Claire brutally shoves three fingers into you, still licking at your folds, grazing her teeth against your clit, and you're barely hanging on by a thread, can only just push off cumming when Agatha decides to bite down hard on your shoulder, and you cry out as the thread snaps.

Your own orgasm is only prolonged as you can feel Agatha's racing through her, can feel how her essence gushes out from her, can't help but loving how she marks you so intimately.

Your head spins from the combined high, and you feel so dizzy and light, relaxing into the floating sensation of it.

Vaguely you can note how Agatha has dissipated her magic, can note how her arms are now softly holding you as she breathes heavily into where she buried her face against your hair, can note how Claire is gently scolding the witch for drawing blood.

You'll appreciate the irony of that later.

For now, you just want to stay floating, want to stay in this wonderful sensation of lightness and nothingness.

Unfortunately, Agatha decides to be mean, and you find yourself being gently pushed away from her, and you fall forward, your face being buried into the bed.

You wordlessly whine your discontent.

“Sh… I know, princess.” Claire soothes, her fingers dancing down your back. “Let mommy move out of the way and then you can lay back down.”

You whine again, and Claire's fingers stop in warning.

Barely a few more seconds pass before warm hands guide you up and backwards, and you can't help but moan at the sight that greets you.

“If the next words out of your mouth is to ask if you can suck on my tits, the answer is no.”

You huff, annoyed.

If Claire doesn't want you to suck on her breasts then she shouldn't lean over you like this, teasing you with how they’re directly in your face.

Agatha laughs from where she's sitting, kneeling on the bed a little bit behind Claire.

It's entirely unfair she looks so unaffected from cumming so hard while you can barely get your limbs to obey your instructions.

“They're welcome to suck on mine, daddy.”

You scowl, upset. You don't want Agatha's, you want Claire's.

“You've gotten greedy, little one.” Claire's tone is sharp.

You pout.

“Just wanna feel close to you, daddy.”

“If you're big enough to have found words to use, you're big enough to listen.” The vampire reprimands. “Now wait, like a good girl. Mommy has been very good waiting for daddy to touch her.”

You pout, but settle back against the pillows, watching Agatha shiver as Claire practically pounces on her though your heavy eyelids, exhaustion starting to creep up on you.

Agatha's moan as Claire's mouth meets her neck makes you clench around nothing, arousal unfairly throbbing through you even as you can feel sleep pressing against the edges of your consciousness.

You whine softly, well aware you're on your way to the realm of dreams, but can't help desiring to stay awake and watch what is sure to be Claire turning Agatha into a babbling, desperate slut.

Your small noises are too quiet for either of your partners to hear, even with Claire having enhanced hearing, their own noises drowning anything else out as Claire teases her way down Agatha's body, the vampire leaving bruises and hickies all over the exposed skin.

Your thighs and legs are starting to feel sticky, the wetness that coated them starting to dry, and as uncomfortable as it is, you can't seem to find in yourself to fight your leaden feeling limbs, and you gently allow your eyes to shut.

The sounds of Agatha begging and Claire's muffled moans accompany you as the darkness presses soothingly down behind your eyes, and you can feel any remaining tension drain from you as you fully relax into the pillows.

Safe, your mind whispers. Loved. Protected.

You can't help the small smile that graces your lips, can't help the way you give yourself over to the all encompassing feeling that fills you up and makes you feel warm all over.

And even though the bed rocks, even though your partners are being so, so loud, you find it all soothing, reassuring.

You don't quite fall asleep, laying somewhere between slumber and wakefulness, and the only thing you're fully aware of is the presence of your lovers.

You aren't startled when you feel something wet glide up and down your sticky thighs, and you sigh in contentment as they begin to feel clean.

“Have a good rest, princess?” Claire asks, her voice hoarse. “Agatha's running a bath for all of us, I just wanted to clean you up a bit first.”

Your attempt at a noise of agreement falls short, the breath getting caught in your lungs, your body still too tired to really do much more than lay there and listen.

“We're almost done, do you think if I help you can lay on your front?”

You try to nod your head this time, but all it does is loll to the side, your eyes still closed, heavy with content exhaustion.

Claire chuckles throatily, and somehow you hear yourself whining.

“Come on, doll. I've got you.” She soothes, warm hands guiding you from your current position until you find yourself with your cheek pressed against the bed and cool air making you shiver as the sticky feeling comes back, this time all over your ass.

“I know, baby.” Claire lightly runs the washcloth over your backside. “You'll feel better in just a few seconds. And oh, would you hear that? Agatha's turned off the tap, the bath must be ready.”

You've find enough willpower to make a sound of agreement.

There's silence for a few moments after that, and then Claire's warm hands return, pushing you as carefully as she can onto your back, before scooping you up into her arms.

You merely curl up into her chest, her slow heartbeat soothing as you feel her walking.

“Is she asleep?” Agatha's low voice slightly echoes.

“‘M on’y half.” Your own voice comes out rough, though it's mostly with sleep rather than because it's sore.

Soft lips press against your head as tender fingers card through your hair.

“I love you, angel.” Agatha whispers against your skull.

“I love you, Atha.” You mumble into Claire's chest, where you still have your face buried. “‘An I love you, Claire bear.”

A set of cold hands make you whimper as Claire's warm ones shift you into the icier pair, and as you settle against Agatha's chest, the vampire hums, “and I love you, princess.”

You can feel her body pressing against you, and hear her give Agatha a kiss.

They don't say any words to one another, but you all know what's being said.

Claire moves away, and you hear something splash against the water as Agatha's magic buzzes around you.

“Alright, I'm ready, doll.”

Agatha walks a few paces before you hear her step into the bathtub, and she carefully lowers herself so that she's laying back, presumably against Claire.

When Agatha uses her magic to shift you to lay against her, you sigh, relaxing into her arms that have wrapped themselves around you, and into the warm water.

“Go to sleep, my love.” The witch quietly says. “We have you.”

You want to put up a fight, you want to enjoy the moment, but in truth you know you won't be able to get your eyes open, let alone keeping them that way, and you sigh again.

“I love you.” You repeat.

“We love you, darling.” Claire's voice is louder than Agatha's. “We'll take care of you.”

And as Agatha lays a kiss to your shoulder you fully relax, letting everything fall limp as the calming darkness of sleep claims you.

#sky writes #c: agatha #c: vampire!claire #claire debella #agatha harkness #claire debella x agatha harkness x reader #claire debella x reader #claire debella x agatha harkness #agatha harkness x reader #they're all so stupid and so fluffy and I love them so much your honor #kathryn hahn

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supersoakerfullofblood · 3 months

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Might get flamed for this--and disclaimer, like what you like, enjoy what you enjoy, I don't want to infringe on that--but

if you grew up with Percy Jackson and are attached to a sanitized, fandomy, and cliched interpretation of Greco-Roman myth and culture, please please please find an interest in some other ancient culture too, or in some other general genre of world lit/myth. Greek stuff is cool, but it’s weirdly romanticized, and even interpretations that look at these myths through genuine historical-cultural lenses (Circe comes to mind. And, of course, our actual sources) get lobotomized by people who just like hearing the names of their mythological blorbos. Pop discussions about this stuff tokenizes everything, and it’s uncomfortable to read. But that might just be me.

And other world lit is cool too! Much of it is decidedly less romantic, but that’s the fun of it! It’s also much less capital w Western, so reading those perspectives for those of us in the US/Europe is an incredible tool to build our empathy and worldview! (Okay, I know Greece is like kinda western and also not at all western, but like, the Western canon is decidedly Greco-Roman-derived, which is what I mean).

Again, I don’t want to ruin anyone’s fun. If you want to ship Aphrodite and Eros, sure man, go for it. I just want you to find something else to be interested in, something that hasn’t been blorbified by the greater fandom culture, so you can bring your perspectives from that passion into how you treat Greco-Roman stuff. And vice versa! Let’s blorbify Mictlāntēcutli or the Baron Samedi or something!

#writing #writeblr #bookblr #booklr #fandom #fanfic

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moinsbienquekaworu · 1 year

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And now, by popular demand, the latest post in the series of me listing fics I have enjoyed reading: Kylux edition! (dedicated to @romanticvampire and @zeawesomebirdie <3)

Usual disclaimers apply, that is to say I have my own personal tastes & biases, I prefer longer works, I read a lot of smut + people write a lot of smut for this ship, there are very few kinks I won't read, I love omegaverse, and there's lots of fucked up dynamics for these two, so read the tags carefully before reading!

Obviously I'm not saying those are the only good fics ever or the best, just that I had them downloaded to my phone/in my AO3 bookmarks and thought they were at least a fun read. You're free to think I have bad or weird tastes, but keep that to yourself.

All the links work as of late june 2023, so if you can't see one of the fics, it's probably archive locked. Sometimes I add comments but sometimes I don't, and obviously I have stronger opinions about certains works than others, but it also can just be that my memories are vague or that the summary just sells the fic better than any comment I could add. The fics are sorted from longest to shortest.

Onto the list!

First, here are authors whose names I Remember, most likely because I dug through their entire AO3 to find more cool fics back when I was really into Kylux, but also maybe because I realised while making this list that they'd written a few works I like but hadn't connected to them before. It doesn't mean those are the only authors worth reading, they really really aren't, they're just authors whose names I recognise and who wrote multiple fics I liked! They're listed in alphabetic order.

– callmelyss/(a)roseofgalaxies

• From the Last Whelming Sea (42k, 10 chapters)

By now, Kylo might have recited the story himself, how it had been before, how there was once a mighty republic—or an empire—or both?—between the many planets. How it had fallen into war and chaos. How, in insolation, their world had changed, the oceans rising, the cities tumbling. How the people had changed afterward, taken to the life still possible under the waves. – Generations after the Republic, the Empire, the Force, and terrestrial civilization have fallen from memory, Kylo is a prince on the cusp of fulfilling his destiny as leader of his people, who live among the sunken remnants of the world before. That is, until he meets Hux, a cantankerous tinkerer with an affinity for technology and the old relics, who challenges his understanding of everything he thought he knew about the oceans, the galaxy, his family—and himself.

• And All That Road Going (38k, 4 chapters)

Kylo regards the pair of them. Phasma’s pale hair haloes her paler face; Hux’s eyes are dark, unfathomable in the shadows. The city’s lights glitter behind them, beckoning them all back, but neither spares a glance that way, at that luminous oasis. They’re both looking at him, expectant, and at the road ahead. And it would be much easier to do this alone; he didn’t want to involve other people, least of all two strangers he’s just met. – Kylo Ren, AKA Ben Solo, the son of a prominent California Senator and a mechanic, flees his past and the authorities, trying to leave both behind in the Nevada desert. Along the way, he picks up a cynical waitress and a sharp-tongued con artist in need of their own new beginnings. Together, in his father's '77 Plymouth Voyager, they find more than the road between the edge lines.

• My Baby's a Devil in the Bedroom (20k, 6 chapters)

“Oh, obviously.” Kylo let out a shaky laugh and ran both hands through his hair. “Wait, no, you’re serious. You’re a fucking demon.” “Well, yes, not to put too fine a point on it.” Hux smiled, clearly pleased with himself at the joke. “Or more accurately, I’m a succubus. A sex demon.” – Kylo has an unusual squatter. He's pretty fine with it.

• Monster, Lovely (8.9k, 2 chapters)

“Wait, what?” The redhead—previously with his tongue halfway down Kylo's throat and his hand jammed into the front of his jeans—takes a halting step backward. He raises his fingers into the grimy light from the bathroom window. No mistake: they’re glistening with secretion and glowing a faint violet as he turns them this way and that, studying them. “Huh.” – It was supposed to be a casual party hookup. That was before Armitage knew about the tentacles.

• Hesitation Change (8.2k)

“I—" Kylo says. Meaning to explain. Except he doesn’t know that he can. Account for the impulse just now, to go against this precisely coordinated spectacle, to answer an unposed question, what it would feel like to kiss him in front of the entire expanse of known civilization, and, perhaps most pressingly, whether his lips are as soft as they look (softer). – The Supreme Leader marries his Grand Marshal.

-> absolutely insane about this author. Monster, Lovely is always lurking in my brain. From the Last Whelming Sea and And All That Road Going altered my brain chemistry. The author made all the works private while I was finishing up the list and I waited until they made them publicly available again because I could not post a Kylux reclist that didn't link to them. Lyss (if that's still what you go by?) if you're reading this you changed my life a little and I don't know you but I love you.

– Camellia Cook

• Catch and Release, in collaboration with armoredsuperheavy (19k, 4 chapters)

Six months after the death of Supreme Leader Snoke, Hux feels like he’s all that’s holding the First Order together, but he’s barely managing to keep himself together. He’s stressed out and exhausted, unable to step away from his work long enough to truly relax. Kylo Ren is intimately acquainted with the feeling of being overwhelmed by one’s responsibilities. Looking at Hux, he remembers a long-ago encounter that helped him escape that feeling once, for a little while. He’s certain he could do the same thing for Hux, if only Hux would let him.

• Decadence; Or, Five Times Hux Tempted Kylo Ren and One Time Ren Tempted Him (17k, 4/7 chapters)

Hux is horrified to learn the depths of the new Supreme Leader's asceticism, and so he personally sets out to convince him that there's nothing wrong with enjoying yourself from time to time--for the greater good of the First Order, of course. A little pleasure might go some way towards decreasing Ren's famous volatility, after all. Not that kind of pleasure, though. This isn't a seduction. (Yes, it is, but Hux is the one being seduced.)

• Moonlighting (11k)

When Hux decides to visit a famous red-light district in search of a little stress relief, he’s disappointed in the selection until a tall, broad stranger in a skirt and heels catches his eye. When he gets closer, he finds that the stranger isn’t a stranger at all--it’s Kylo Ren, Supreme Leader of the First Order, selling himself on a street corner. It must be some sort of undercover work to track down a resistance operative--surely that’s the only possible explanation. There’s no way Ren could be doing this just because he gets off on it… right?

• masters of the fucking universe (5.8k)

Kylo Ren, CEO of First Order Peacekeeping Solutions, plucks his top engineer, Armitage Hux, out of his lab and brings him along to a high-class fundraiser to help sell their newest innovation. Hux is just trying to keep up, and not give away the enormous crush he has on his boss--which is made much more difficult when Kylo decides he wants some company after the event.

-> I keep thinking about Moonlighting, I would safely put it in the top 10 of the hottest fics I have ever read (hottest to me personally of course). I will forever mourn that Decadence didn't get finished, but the 4 chapters we have are already incredible.

– flyting

• In A Crowd of Thousands (1.2k)

Hux recalls the time he met Ben Solo, unaware that Kylo remembers it too. “It was Endor Day,” Kylo realizes. He remembers those parades, distantly, through the veil of another life. A hot, cloudless summer day and a cheering crowd. “Yes,” Hux says. “I didn’t realize it at the time or I wouldn’t have-” he stops, shutting his mouth. “Wouldn’t what?” “I suppose I got rather into the spirit of things. I was twelve. It was warm and there was music, and everyone was so excited. Someone gave me a free iced chocolate. It was the best thing I’d ever tasted.”

• Breaking Down Like Fractions (6.9k, 2 chapters)

For the TFA-kink prompt: AU where Ben Solo never became Kylo Ren, but he's still the same man who *could* have become Kylo Ren. He's prone to fits of temper, he's very strong in the Force, and... he's a Jedi. He's developed a soft touch on people's minds (because Uncle Luke is so disappointed when he's mean to prisoners, although Uncle Luke is disappointed in him anyway) and he's the Resistance's interrogator of last resort. And then the Resistance captures a prize: General Hux of the First Order. He's building a base somewhere that can destroy an entire star system at once. And Ben is the only one who can find out where it is.

• Reputation (15k, 9 chapters)

Kylo finds out Hux is an omega. Functionally it makes no difference -- everybody in the FO takes hormone control -- but every so often medical deems fit to have someone go through a rut/heat. Alpha/omegas are uncommon enough that it doesn't present real disruptions. Kylo is excited. He's an alpha, and has never experienced being around an available omega. Omegas are supposed submissive, needy things -- according to Han's old romance novels and Snoke's gender essentialism 101, at least. And the glut of porn. Subjugating the general sounds appealing. It turns out heat makes Hux mean. He's aggressive, hostile, and doesn't seem to give a fuck about Kylo or his fancy dick.

-> Reputation has been on my wall list of fanfics I like since July 2021 and the author writes great (that's the end of the sentence, their writing is great)

– imperialhuxness

• Brighter Visions (14k)

Then: Free-wheeling arms runner Kylo Ren sells illicit kyber to a disgraced general with nothing left to lose. Now: The Emperor doesn't cope well with lateness from his best clandestine operative. – "Kylo’s chest clenches, and he pulls Hux closer. The Force is glowing again at the margin of his consciousness, something warm and golden and alive threatening to burst out of it. Thirty years of life, and he’s been three different people: the failed padawan, the misfit criminal, and the Emperor’s one-man death squad. Only the lattermost has been happy."

• Love, Your Crooked Neighbor (11k)

When Snoke assigned Hux to bring in his newest asset, Hux was expecting some everyday Coruscanti underworlder on a low-profile Core World. Predictable. Routine. What he gets is a burning compound on a nameless hunk of rock, a confused young pseudo-Sith, and oh, yeah. Feelings.

• Super Fade (8k)

After Ben returns to his hometown from a disastrous first semester of college, his dad attempts to revive one of their oldest father-son bonding activities: picking out New Year's fireworks. His going-places high school ex is the last person he expects to find on the other side of the counter. – Over a gray v-neck—not a button-down, what the hell— that bares his pale throat and prominent collar bones, the guy’s wearing a leather jacket. An enamel pride flag pin shines on his lapel. “Oh, my god,” Ben breathes. “Armitage?” What has to be Armitage fucking Hux looks him up and down. “How‘s Yale?” he says, and adds belatedly, “You may set your items on the table.”

-> Once again, Super Fade changed my life, it is so very memorable to me for personal reasons. Love, Your Crooked Neighbor is an extremely fun read also, not like funny but very enjoyable to me

– Kyluxtrashpit @kyluxtrashpit (who is still posting about them even though it's been years, thank you for your service, I haven't read for these two in a while but I'll swing by for your last fic)

• Floss Me (2k)

Hux, Kylo's boyfriend, is aghast to find out how rarely Kylo flosses (i.e. never) and he can't take it anymore, so he decides to take matters into his own hands. Kylo's mind, however, takes things in a different direction, and it turns out both of them enjoy the rather unexpected results.

• Aural (2.7k)

Hux fucks Kylo's ear. (Yeah you read that right)

• Monthly Reports (3.1k)

Kylo Ren's tantrums are expensive, and those extra expenses always complicate Hux's paperwork. Rebalancing the budget takes time, time that could be better spent doing something useful. So, of course, he devises a punishment for Ren.

-> Now those may sound a little... strange. Especially Aural. And it would be reasonable of you to think "ew I'm not reading that" but what is life if you never read fics that sound insane and are actually also very good? Huh? You can check out the rest of their works because they're also good, this is just the few I had downloaded on my phone. Floss Me is more normal and I am still a little obsessed with it <3

– notlikelybutpossible (all archive restricted!)

• the Fall Out Kylux series (148k, 3 works of about 50k each)

Inexperienced alpha Kylo Ren gets stranded on Hoth with reluctant omega Armitage Hux. Guess who’s going into heat. Guess who has to help him…

• My lonely heart calls (37k, 3 chapters)

Irreverent werewolf Kylo Ren meets repressed furry Armitage Hux. They're perfect for each other.

• the Dick in a box series (8.7k, 3 works)

In which Kylo Ren presents Hux with his dick. In a box.

• Once A-Pawn A Time (7.2k)

Hux has seen the mysterious man around a fair bit over recent months – he's hard to miss, with his height and build, not to mention the scar that runs all the way down one cheek. Hux is reasonably sure he’s living out of the battered Ford that he often leaves in the Walmart parking lot. But he's never come into the pawn shop before…

• Yours, desperately (6.7k)

Ren discovers Hux has a secret kink. And, being an emotionally fluent, boundary-respecting adult, decides his new purpose in life is to convince Hux to share…

• Holding out for a Hero (3.6k)

When Kylo Ren emerges from the waves before him, Armitage Hux is far more interested in his cock than, y'know, the fact that he's a centaur...

• Tie me down and use me up (2.1k)

"I just think that Kylo's massive cock deserves to be edged or used as a dildo for someone else's pleasure. Preferably with little to no regard for the pleasure or satisfaction of the man it belongs to." (@ProteanKylux, 28 July 2021, Twitter)

• Oil and fire (2k)

Kylo, a friendly liquid blob monster, encounters a human hiking through the forest who entrances him like a flame entrances a moth. He wants to touch.

• Soggy Biscuits (2k)

Kylo Ren was not prepared to deal with a very drunk, very uninhibited Hux bragging about how fast he can masturbate. But... he also wasn't prepared to just let him win.

-> I'm insane about all of those but especially the Fall Out Kylux series, Alpha Dog and Omegalomaniac lives in my brain still. I also remember clicking on the AO3 email for Soggy Biscuits <3 Once A-Pawn A Time is weird to read once Anakin becomes your blorbo as well but the concept charms me so much

– sigo

• Homecoming (13k)

“Ren, it’s midnight,” Hux sighed at his infuriating coworker. “Get to it.” “I may have informed my entire family previously that we were dating.”

• Whitecap Violence (5.2k)

When Kylo had first wanted to bring Hux along, Hux had protested. Bad enough that the Supreme Leader was always off galivanting planetside somewhere. The Chancellor should stay on Coruscant. Kylo would hear none of it, and here Hux was.

• The One with the Eggs (4.9k)

Hux turned on his heel, but hardly made it two steps before running straight into Kylo Ren. He knew his face betrayed his dismay. He didn’t have time for this.

-> Eggs are not everyone's thing but when they're yours it's really hard to find good fics, thankfully this fic exists. Homecoming was a kinda strange but fascinating read, by which I mean I read it once years ago and I still remember it pretty well, and Whitecap Violence is easily one of my fave titles I've ever seen

– solohux

• Screaming Colour (38k)

For as long as Hux can remember, he's been able to see everything in brilliant, vivid colour. His mother tells him that it means that he's got a soulmate somewhere in the galaxy who's waiting for him and little Hux is excited to think that his soulmate can see things in the amazing colours that he can. But one day, the colour begins to drain from Hux's world. (Soulmate AU where you see everything in perfect colour until your soulmate dies)

• What We're Made Of (13k, 3 chapters)

On the morning of your 5th birthday, you'll wake up with a new toy beside you, one that is made in the image of your destined soulmate. Young Ben has a little wooden General with orange hair and a woolly greatcoat that matches his little cap, whilst young Armitage has a soft plush of a Jedi, one with soft dark hair and two brown buttons for eyes. The two boys are happy with their new toys. Their families, however, are not. It shapes them.

• Emergency Consort (7.2k)

Supreme Leader Kylo Ren is close to sealing a deal with a highly influential council that’ll help sway the war in their favour. The only issue is that the council only deal with alphas who are mated as they believe that they’re much tamer and more level-headed this way. All Kylo needs to do is pretend to be mated whilst visiting the planet to sign the agreement. He seizes the opportunity to offer Hux a promotion in return for pretending to be his mate. Hux agrees, and their courting begins.

• Pander To The Prince (4.7)

Armitage Hux is a pillow prince, leaving it up to his Sugar Daddy, Kylo Ren, to do all of the work for him in the bedroom.

• The Sixth Drink Instinct (2.2k)

Drunk student Hux spots his hot professor in a bar and goes over to him.

-> What We're Made Of and Emergency Consort were some of my first Kylux fics I think and I have such a deep fondness for them! Also just the concept of What We're Made Of is incredible.

– sternfleck

• the Arcana Imperii series (56k, 9 works)

Based on the “Duel of the Fates” leaked alternate script for Episode 9.

• Nestful (5.5k)

Out of everyone in the First Order, only Kylo Ren knows the truth about Hux: the General is half alien...and entirely appealing. Or: Hux builds a nest out of pillows and clothes when it’s time for him to lay his eggs. Kylo wins his trust to enter the nest and give Hux the reward he deserves. For Kylux Positivity Week 2.0, Day 8. Prompt: “Wild Card."

• salt & he was still hungry (2.7k)

“I don’t see why it’s so crucial that I share this childhood experience of yours,” Armitage grumbles, cuddling Millicent closer even as he leans back into Ben’s arms. “We’re adults. We’re old enough to have children of our own, if we were so inclined. Surely there are better ways to spend our time than in surrendering to nostalgia.” Ben only hugs him tighter, one big arm around Armitage’s waist, while, with the other hand, he pulls a pillow into Armitage’s lap and rests the open picture book across it. Then, with a last kiss to Armitage’s temple, he begins to read. In the light of the moon, a little egg lay on a leaf. - Soft grown-up boyfriends Ben and Armitage cuddle in a blanket nest and enjoy Ben's favourite picture book together. At least, Ben enjoys it. Armie, on the other hand, has many thoughts about caterpillars, child development, and their romantic future.

-> The whole "salt-verse" thing is fascinating to me tbh. Remember what I said about egg fics being rare? Yeah, this is My Egg Fic™ for Kylux (and one of my egg fics of forever across everything I've ever read). Is it weird that I have one, yes, is the fic deserving of the spot it's been occupying rent-free in my brain for years, also yes. I hate to say this but Arcana Imperii is the vibes I wanted for the end of another Kylux fic lol.

And now, the actual list of fics! Some of those authors also wrote other fics (cough cough hollycomb) but if they're not on the list it's that I just never read them/found it easy to pick a favourite, not that I think they're bad!

• Dollars to Donuts by ktula (183k, 24 chapters)

Kylo just wants to ask Hux out on a date. That's all he wants. Sure, he's been closeted since he figured out he was gay, and he's never gone on a date with anybody before, and also Hux intimidates the hell out of him--but how bad could it possibly be? (It could be 'proposing a celibate fake marriage to the guy you've been in love with for two years so he can get his inheritance' bad, Kylo. That's how bad it could be.

-> Classic, I can't not include it but it's probably super popular and you might have seen it somewhere (I don't know I don't look at stats or talk to people). Personally not only did I like the fake dating (love that stuff) I also appreciated the author including a commentary at the end of chapters, it helped me Get the fic and it was cool.

• Ad Augustana per Sciencia by Star_flaming (157k, 12 chapters)

Hux prided himself on being a man who managed to have interests outside of the military. His newest interest; history so old that many thought it useless in the modern age. And he could have been quite content, reading articles and books on ancient cultures if it wasn't for Kylo Ren, who seemed to have made it his goal to inject himself into Hux's academic pursuits when he wasn't destroying the ship through his apparent self-destructive tendencies. Or: Academia brings two idiots together and builds a new regime

-> I never finished this fic but the worldbuilding is absolutely insane and I say that with all the love in my heart. The concept of space children makes me foam at the mouth it's so cool and I want to see that energy in canon SW so bad. Incredible. Also love when there's Ancient History <3

• In The Days Still Left by carefulben (154k, 23 chapters)

The instructions are clear, but following them will take more strength of nerves and willpower than either General Hux or Kylo Ren could have anticipated. With Starkiller Base destroyed, they are sent on a mission that will test their loyalties and bring things to light that may have been better off kept in the dark.

-> Add it to the pile of never finished fics I should really really finish. I remember it vaguely but I know it was cool and good.

• Reach Out and Touch Faith by for_autumn_i_am and ktula (146k, 10 chapters)

New Contacts (1): General A. Hux [Finalizer] - Kylo blinks. Sits up, and carefully presses the button. It’s—fuck, it’s a professional holo of him. Full colour, instead of the wavering blue of the hologram unit embedded in Snoke’s throne, and General Hux has—General Hux has red hair, and green-grey eyes, and he’s so focused, so settled. Like he knows what he wants. Like he knows how to get it.

-> Okay I'm going to be honest I read that one because of the title haha. It might even have introduced me to the song, but I'm not certain. Almost no memories of it but it absolutely cannot be bad, look at that summary, look at those authors, I just know it's good.

• The structural fabrications series by kyluxtrashcompactor (133k & 3 works, 40-50k per work)

Six months ago, Armitage Hux fabricated a fiancé, never expecting to have to drag him to a funeral in Georgia, pretending to be something they weren't. The problem was, Ben Solo was everything Hux had ever wanted. Ben Solo had hidden his love for his roommate for years, thinking that someone as perfect as Hux would never want a broken soldier like him. But he was wrong. Sometimes you have to tell a lie to find the truth.

-> This series was so.... yeah. If you don't want to Feel Things inside your heart right now you should keep it for later but it's great. I read the first fic, knew I couldn't handle the two others right then, and unfortunately didn't come back, but that first work was insane and incredible and a ride.

• Beauty Beneath (Beyond) by dallystrings (104k, 11 chapters)

“You know Ben, he’s a disaster when it comes to planning in advance,” Hux laughed lightly, dropping his hand to entwine his fingers in Ben’s. “I’m Hux, his boyfriend.” or, the one where Ben really doesn't want to go home, and Hux is just trying to be a better friend. or, or, the 2020 newly edited version of Beauty Beneath (2016)

-> I like fake/pretend relationships okay!! It might not be the single best I've ever read but it does the job and it does it well.

• Suit Porn by for_autumn_i_am (77k, 9 chapters)

Armitage Hux has worked tirelessly to become CEO of First Order Corp's UK office, however his counterpart in the States, Kylo Ren, is the most infuriating man with whom to exchange emails. When Hux is called to New York to meet with Ren, he encounters a delicious man in a suit, who wants to do unspeakable things to him. But when Hux walks into his meeting the next morning, he's in for a surprise and the beginning of a relationship that is far more than just business.

-> I had no memories of this one so I went to read it and I don't think it's present-me's jam anymore, but it sure delivers upon its premise if that sounds interesting to you!

• Sweet Home Arkanis by Gefionne and minzimpression (68k, 8 chapters)

Hux is engaged to the man of his dreams. There’s just one catch: he’s already married to his high school sweetheart, Ben Solo. Now he needs a divorce, and he needs it fast.

-> Do you think those cliché hallmark movies are entertaining if not very good? Well. Fanfic version, ie automatically more enjoyable because at least there's no weird sexism. I'm selling it all wrong, don't listen to me, it's just really good, I have great memories of that one.

• There's no escape from my authority by The_Marron (67k, 20 chapters)

Hux refuses to go to Snoke like a schoolboy waiting for punishment he did not deserve. Now he has two weeks until they reach the Supreme Leader's quarters to stage a coup and take Snoke out of the equation. To do that he will not only need his crew, but also the loyalty of his rival. Nobody said becoming an Emperor was easy and pleasant.

-> I only remember the title but it is a really cool title. I think it was good? That summary is certainly making me want to take another look at it

• All Hearts Come Home For Christmas by aaelandair (66k, 8 chapters)

"Do you want to come home with me and pretend to be my boyfriend for a week?" Hux stares at him incredulously. "What the actual fuck, Ren? No." - Kylo desperately needs a fake boyfriend for Christmas, so his family won't be disappointed in him once again. Hux would be the perfect candidate for the job, except for the part where he doesn't want to do it. Convincing him that this is actually a good idea should be easy, though. Right?

-> Aand some more fake/pretend relationship! This one is really good at that trope and a very fun read <3

• Status: It's Complicated by PangolinPirate and sunnywritesstuff (61k, 8 chapters)

Armitage Hux is a graduate student working hard to make ends meet. To ease the financial strain he offers tutoring lessons. Enter one Kylo Ren, an apparently spoiled rich kid whose struggling to pass his law classes and is in danger of loosing his considerable inheritance if he can't improve. Kylo has everything Hux wishes he had when he was an undergraduate: Money, connections, parents who gave a shit about his education. Kylo asks Hux to be his tutor and what started as a side gig for cash turns into feelings. At first, Hux is unimpressed with the spoiled man-child student, but slowly realizes he can’t hide from it anymore— Kylo Ren does something to him that no other person ever has before, and to hell if he won’t indulge in that.

-> Didn't finish that one either, I'm a fanfic magpie and AO3 is full of very shiny jewels, but the beginning was fun

• the Kylux Animal Welfare AU (Madame, That's Not A Hedgehog & co) by GenerallyHuxurious (57k & 11 works for the whole series, 21k & 7 chapters for the main fic)

Armitage Hux is an animal welfare officer with First Order Animal Rescue, one of the biggest animal charities in the world, he spends his days saving animals and his nights home alone with his three-legged rescue cat Millicent. Kylo Ren's mother helped him open a private wildlife clinic in the hope that he'd stop causing international incidents in the name of animal rights. Hux hasn't had a date in six years and Kylo's been trying to work out how to ask him out for the last four. Now he might have spotted his chance…

-> ASPEC HUX!!! This is not a drill!!!!! He's aspec!!!!! He's demi!!!! The plot is also immaculate obviously but aspec Hux!!!! It touches on animal abuse so be careful, I know the last chapter really shook me, but it stands out in my memory and I love it a whole lot. Aspec Hux also once again.

• Dire Oversight by ezlebe (54k, 7 chapters)

“Thvala has a long tradition of binding political alliances with marriage,” Captain Pforn says, looking up from the heretofore agreed contract and folding his hands over the data pad. He has a smile like what he said isn’t absolutely senseless, “It is the will of Sovereign Andeles that you and Prince Gheralt fulfill this aspect of the contract.”

-> Fake marriages my beloveds. I keep reccing fics with that trope but they're all fun!!

• On Bended Knee by rudbeckia (47k, 10 chapters)

Armitage Hux, just out of an unhealthy long term relationship with an older man, is on vacation. On his first night, the complete stranger from the next room proposes. The handsome complete stranger with shoulders that look like he could wrestle a ram and hair that would make a poet weep. Armitage says yes. That’s no basis for a lasting relationship. Is it?

-> Ohoho I am insane about that one. The start of their relationship. The development. Hux's ex. I won't spoil but there is Something in their relationship that is different from what you usually see in romance and it's great.

• Young Couple Arguing in IKEA, 2016 (Mixed Media) & First Love, Late Spring by hollycomb (7k, 38k & 3 chapters)

Ren drags Hux to IKEA and asks him what he thinks about cacti. Hux does his best to avoid a full nervous breakdown.

"Hux felt like he had nothing left to lose and ended up back at the apartment Ren shared with his cousin and her husband, indulging in what he assumed would be a reckless one night stand. It was reckless indeed, but Hux was still there three days and approximately nineteen fucks later." Ren's POV on bringing a lonely ginger criminal home and never wanting to let him go.

-> ALSO obsessed with that one. Obsessed obsessed. It hit me right in the feels and it was absolutely insane and I am in genuine love with it. You can read them in whichever order, I think I read First Love, Late Spring first? It comes first in in-universe chronological order but that doesn't really matter. BTW, if you have not, listen to First Love, Late Spring by Mitski, it is also an insane song that makes me feel shrimp emotions.

• Hotline Bling by minzimpression (37k, 4 chapters)

Hux wants a dick pic from his recent hook-up. Unfortunately, he texts the wrong number.

-> If I was serious-insane about the others I'm silly-insane about that one. It's very very fun to read, at least in my eyes.

• What we want by mssdare (37k, 7 chapters)

Kylo is doing Community Service in a state-run assisted living facility outside NYC. He hates his job, his life, and mostly--himself. One of the patients in the facility is old Colonel Hux. His son, Armitage, is the most infuriating, stuck up man Kylo has ever met in his life.

-> And back to more serious-insane. I think if you read all the fics that Resonate with me you can tell what's wrong with me. ALSO! ASPEC HUX!! Yeah I have to shout it from the rooftops because I love it. More aspec characters everywhere. I love his relationship to sexuality there.

• On the Waves by OneWhoSitsWithTurtles (34k, 7 chapters)

Armitage Hux is forced to join his father and step-mother on a 14 day cruise hosted for high society families to network and debut their children to the world. Now that Armitage is 25 years old he is expected to marry someone whose family will strengthen the Hux business and if by the end of the cruise Armitage isn’t engaged, he’s in trouble. Worse still is the fact that Armitage is gay and his father would disown him if he knew. Resigned to a miserable two weeks, Armitage is caught off guard when he catches the eye of Ben Solo, who is on the cruise with his own family. It doesn’t help that Ben is exactly his type and although Armitage tries, he can’t resist temptation as he and Ben become close. For two weeks their affection grows in secret with one question remaining: what happens when the cruise ends and their time together runs out?

-> The plot is straightforward, the fic is fun, there's some Rey and Phasma in there too if you like them!

• Something About Volcanoes by betts (28k, 5 chapters)

“Think about it.” Hux makes a grandiose, sweeping motion with his arm. “The drama. The chaos. The rumors. The only thing better than a destination wedding is a heartwarming coming-out story to take the spotlight away from your selfish loved ones and their horrid pursuit of emotional fulfillment. Then you wait a few months, and announce it was all just a phase and you’re in fact happily engaged to…I don’t know, one of those body pillow things.”

-> Yet more fake dating. I just love fake dating. They're assholes in this one and I love assholes.

• fingerprints smudging the stars by TheSpaceCoyote (21k, 2 chapters)

For years Hux has carried himself with the poise and power of an alpha, his true endotype hidden with the help of fake scents and powerful suppressants. But on the cusp of Starkiller's completion, something slips through the general's carefully crafted failsafes and threatens to undo everything he's built up over the years. Hux has never been one to accept help, but with an unexpected problem mounting—not to mention the interference of unpredictable alpha Kylo Ren—he might have to.

-> Dope title and I have very few memories of this one but it sounds like a neat omegaverse. I also trust the author to do words good

• The Wildflower Prince by PangolinPirate and solohux (21k, 4 chapters)

Armitage Hux is an omega, locked away in a tower until his alpha father can find use for him. His tower is deep in the enchanted forests and surrounded by an impenetrable circle of magic, so Hux lives a very lonely and quiet life. That is, until gifts begin appearing upon his balcony.

-> I really like omegaverse too! Sue me! This one is neat and simple and a great read, it has Rapunzel vibes and it's fun.

• Caim by Eiramma (20k)

Hux is stolen from his academy bunk late one night and is dumped on the frozen waste land that is Ilum along with a small handful of his other classmates. Despite never having dreamed a night of his life, on his first night on this frozen planet, Hux finds himself in the body of an angry padawan, Ben Solo. As his stay on Ilum continues, it becomes apparent that pair of them share some sort of deep connection forged through mysticism of the Force, that permits them spend their dreams in one another's waking lives, and Hux has no idea why. But with danger lurking around every snow covered tree, Hux begins to wonder if he will be able to live long enough to understand the mystery of their bond, never mind deal with the growing fondness for the other boy that has begun to bloom in his heart.

-> not on AO3 anymore but I have an epub file if someone's interested, just hit me up in private! I love love love this kind of dyad thing, and I have a fondness for teen!Kylux.

• the Galactic La Leche League series by gundamoocow (17k, 2 works)

Kylo Ren’s jaw hangs loosely and his eyes are steadfastly fixed on Hux’s chest. He hasn’t moved an inch since Hux unclasped his tunic hook by hook to reveal a tight, flattening undershirt that leaves little to the imagination. Hux shirks the tunic off and drapes it over a chair before pulling the undershirt over his head. Removing it is always a struggle, but he manages with enough grace for Ren not to notice. He is topless now, wearing only his boots and jodhpurs, standing awkwardly in his room while Ren appears frozen in time with his eyes glued to Hux’s torso, surprise plain on his face. Hux frowns. “Surely you were aware?” Ren shakes his head. “No,” he utters, his voice weak as if winded. “I had no idea.”

-> Now I know what you're thinking, what is this, why are you reccing this, etc. Well the fic is fun to read, and it's hard to find male lactation without mpreg or children in the picture but the idea has potential to be really hot, so. There. Cringe culture is dead, live a little and try a good lactation fic

• Family Values by SpookMouse (16k, 8 chapters)

“Alone on Thanksgiving? Mad at your dad? I am a 28 year old felon with no high school degree, and a dirty old van one year younger than me painted like Eddie Van Halen’s guitar. I can play anywhere between the ages of 20 and 29 depending on if I shave. I’m a line cook and work late nights at a bar. If you’d like to have me as your strictly platonic date for Thanksgiving, but have me pretend to be in a very long or serious relationship with you, to torment your family, I’m game.” Or, Hux brings Kylo home for the holidays.

-> I think the summary just sells that one on its own. Look at this. Incredible Kylo energy.

• Unknown Pleasures by gundamoocow and hexgoldyloins (16k, 7 chapters)

Kylo Ren and Armitage Hux are rival employees at First Order Engineering, a multi-disciplinary engineering company headed by the elusive CEO Snoke. For years, Kylo and Hux have been at each other's throats, vying for power and advancement within the aerospace division. An opportunity to have an audience with Snoke presents itself, but it involves forming an unlikely alliance and going undercover…to a BDSM sex club.

-> Also reread that one for the list and hmmm yeah it's good. The BDSM etiquette could be better but if you compare it to canon they're doing so well <3

• Nothing but a Flickering Flame by leviathanofthesky (14k, 7 chapters)

General Hux’s father visits the Finalizer after Snoke’s death to pay tribute to the newly crowned supreme leader. Unfortunately for Armitage, Kylo’s sudden interest in him and the fact that his shipment of suppressants seems to be lost in stars-know-where doesn’t help the situation at all.

-> Hmm, good old Brendol bashing <3

• Reptile Husbandry by koi_boi (13k)

Hux is an accomplished researcher who's having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad time in the field. He stumbles into a cave filled with secrets and one very large, very curious snake. Hux gets fucked in more ways than one.

• There's a Desert in My Blood and a Storm in Your Eyes by frapandfurious (12k, 5 chapters)

Hux and Kylo have been on the road together for over a year. They're free and they're in love. Until a ghost from Hux's past finally catches up with them.

• Give Me a Shot to Remember by decotex (11k, 6 chapters)

Everyone on the Finalizer has at some point had to listen to the General and their resident Dark Lord's flirting. They are not subtle. Someone points out Kylo Ren's soft spot for a certain First Order general. Hux contemplates this over vodka. Feat. heavy drinking, a ship full of gossipers, and no subtlety whatsoever.

-> I found a fave song of mine in this fic. The last chapter was an Experience and I re-live it every time I listen to Goodbye to a World.

• Lapdog by Antique_Mango (11k)

“I’m willing to listen to what the Supreme Council has to say,” Ren continues like they are having a reasonable conversation, and not like Hux is half a moment away from losing every last bit of his hard-earned decorum, “as soon as you sit down.” “On your lap.” – After his fall from grace Hux is barely keeping it together, convinced that everyone wants him dead (himself included.) Kylo tries to change his mind.

-> Oh yeah baby, amplify those emotions! Make them feel things! More!!! I left a loonng comment on that one because it fascinated me so much.

• A Whisper In My Ear by Ellstra (10k)

A minute reaction of Hux’s inspires Ren to suggest adding some spice into their sex life. Hux isn’t entirely certain what to expect but he’s definitely on board.

• Young Men at the End of Everything by partialresonance (9k)

Kylo thinks he can get used to life in exile, so long as Hux is there to live it with him. But a random stroke of fate suddenly throws Hux's life into jeopardy, and Kylo has to turn to an unlikely source for help.

-> The title is great the old lady character is great it's a good read and pretty memorable for a 9k fic

• an insult to basic geometry by brawlite (7.4k)

It's not that Kylo wasn't trying to summon a demon; it's just that he didn't think it would actually work. He also didn't prepare himself for the hypothetical demon that he probably wasn't going to summon to be so damn hot. And now the demon is asking him what he wants -- and the only thing Kylo really seems to want is the demon himself. That's within the terms and conditions, right?

-> Dope title, check, demons, check, I follow the author on here and am slowly getting into other fandoms they've also written for, check. (no but for real when I saw their name looking for Venom fic it felt like seeing an old friend, great surprise)

• Pheromones by EmberSH (6.2k)

After a blind date gone wrong all Hux wants is to have a drink and find a distraction for the evening; Best case scenario someone who'll treat him a little rough. Kylo Ren is so much more than that.

-> This was the hottest fic I'd ever read for a looong time years ago. Genuinely, it completely blew my mind when I was like 14. The follow up was less fun because I am Not a noncon person and I really really wasn't back then but it's also good. The fic has vampires, go read it if you like vampires.

• silk & heat by surrenderer (5.2k)

When Ben gets home, Armitage has some exciting plans for the rest of their day together. For Year of Kylux's "Omegaverse" week!

• A Decent Proposal by PaperPrince (5k, 5 chapters)

Hux is very happy not being in a relationship with his roommate and best friend Kylo Ren. But when Kylo faces deportation, they find themselves re-evaluating their co-dependent lifestyle. What is marriage really? Two people who is on the cruise the rest of their lives together. So what difference does it make if you take sex away from the equation?

-> ASPEC KYLO!!!! Not the best writing in the entire world, but the concept and aspec Kylo got me.

• Botanical Exercises by need_more_meta (3.9k)

Hux finds a flower on his bed. Then another one. And another one. For Kylux Positivity Week 3.0, Prompt: “Flower Language” with a dash of “Oh No He’s Hot.”

-> It reminds me of Dites-le avec des fleurs <3

• When Christmas Comes by Pizzzazlut (3.6k)

"Kylo bit his lip as he tried not to show Hux how much that simple touch was already affecting him. Because an Alpha shouldn’t want this. An Alpha should never crave for his sweet albeit feisty Omega to fuck him into submission like this, to make him beg for more with each delicious thrust." Or the one where Alpha Kylo bottoms for his lovely Omega.

-> People who do fun stuff with A/B/O dynamics are galaxy brained and so very right and I love them.

• What Couples Do by Mesmeret (3.4k)

Kylo likes matching with Hux. At first it’s socks but they gradually figure out ways to share things together that keep them company when the other is away. My contribution for the Soft Issue of the Kylux Zine Project.

• How Not To Train Your Not-Sith Enemy by humane (3.1k)

"Forgive me, master." Hux murmured, head bowed in shame, "I feel it again. The pull from the dark. It tempts me more each time." Luke arched a single bushy eyebrow. You? Tempted? it seemed to say. "It's Kylo Ren." Hux admitted. Sympathy and profound understanding blossomed on Luke's face, the likes of which could only be observed in individuals that had personally experienced the unique brand of disaster that was Kylo Ren. "Are you tempted by his chaos?" he prompted. "His unbridled power? His seeming freedom? None of those are the way of the force." Hux frowned, puzzled. "No." he said, "I'm just tempted to decapitate him." Or: In which Hux is an EXTREMELY uptight jedi knight and Kylo is the not-sith that gives Hux aneurisms with the sheer blazing power of his incompetence.

-> I don't know how well this meshes with prequels lore, I read it back when I didn't care about anything beyond the sequels, but the premise is great

• Blood, Bitemarks, and Stupid, Stupid Love by TheSilentUnderworld (3k)

Being roomates with an annoying Alpha Werewolf was fine. Until he started messing with Hux's mail.

-> Werewolf x vampire <3 <3 <3

• I'll Be the Sun, You Be the Moon by need_more_meta (2.1k)

Chancellor Hux is preparing for a ball. He enlists Ren’s help. For Kylux Positivity Week 3.0, Prompt: “Put It on Hux | Put It on Kylo.” For Year of Kylux, Prompt: “Duel of the Fates Timeline.”

• Sweet Redolence by Jakathine (2k)

What happens when the desire to best your opponent turns into a desire to bed them instead…and then fate pushes you together rather Forcefully.

• Rabid Curs by Potboy (1.9k)

In which Kylo, all alone in the First Order with a master who mistreats him, goes to the wrong man for comfort. Unfortunately Armitage Hux is all he's got, and he's not a very comforting person. They do their best - it's all they can do.

• Dirty White Boots by BlackHellKitty (1.6k)

A Kylux-story based on the song "Dirty White Boots" from Lenny Kravitz. Kylo and Hux do some roleplay sometimes. Just pure PWP without any kind of big story. :3

-> The reasond Dirty White Boots is a Kylux song to me

• Come Morning by elfriniol (1.5k)

True, Kylo liked Hux. A lot. He couldn't imagine his life without talking to him about Star Wars trivia and offering judgmental commentary for shows they occasionally skimmed through on Netflix. Or going out for drinks. But if Hux wanted something else – that proverbial, dreaded more – Kylo wasn't sure of himself.

-> ASPEC KYLO!!! Oh how I love it when they're aspec.

• After by Davechicken (1.1k)

Aftercare, and emotions.

• Living in Close Proximity in Case of Sudden Yet Inevitable Betrayal by 5ofSpades (874 words, 9 chapters, drawings)

In which the Supreme Leader gets himself two ginger roommates.

-> This. Is not a fic. It's drawings and I cried at the end like a BABY. The artist's art style is impeccable, it inspired me a whole lot back when I 'read' it.

And this is IT folks! I didn't @ anyone (except Kyluxtrashpit) because I only know a few authors' tumblrs and I didn't want to discriminate, plus the fandom is pretty old and I would assume most of them have moved on or are inactive. If you know that someone on the list would like to be tagged don't hesitate to do it/tell me though, those fics all mean(t) a lot to me!

Hope the list is good & you, the reader, find something new and interesting to read! I really don't know which fics are considered popular or good or whatever, I don't talk to people usually. Okay bye bye thank you for reading <3

#FINALLY OUT!!!#if you want to be insane about any of the fics in here even in like 5 years feel free to come into my inbox #these two hold a very special place in my heart and they will forever #star wars #kylux #wow i have a ramble tag now #fandom nerdery

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