#enjoy (my following who is only here for minecrafters) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

shipwreckie · 10 days

Text

long (like ridiculously long) rant about watcher entertainment

Whilst the vast majority of the response to the watcher drama has been negative I still have seen a few people expressing opinions along the lines of ‘oh its just $6’ ‘shouldn't creators be paid for their work’ etc. I also think this situation is getting a lot of attention from people who don't necessarily watch Watcher, or haven’t keep up with them in years so here is my breakdown of why people are unhappy with the announcement that Watcher will be putting ALL upcoming content behind a $6 a month streaming service (with the exception of the premiere episode of each season going to Youtube.)

The issue is not that it's $6.

The success of other internet companies like dropout and smosh is proof people are willing to pay for content they enjoy and to support independent content creators. I personally have given money to kickstarters, patreons, digital downloads etc in the past. But I do that because I know I’m valued as a fan with and without my money. I still get access to content on youtube for free. Even Dropout, who is a much larger and more expensive operation than Watcher, releasing 5 show a week, still maintains a steady Youtube presence.

The thing with these internet companies is they can be successful in creating something but they do have to understand that you are on the internet. You're not netflix or HBO or hulu or whatever. Watcher’s obsession with creating ‘television-calibre content’ worth $6 a month whilst also only having one show a week is unrealistic. They want to be independent creators but also television producers… but you’re not! They hate being youtubers so much but YOU ARE. That’s how you gained a fanbase in the first place and you were successful at it! If you’re not happy being a youtuber that’s fine, move on and do something else. But you can’t expect it to be funded by the fans. So many famous artists create content they care less about that has a larger audience, and that in turn funds the stuff they DO care about. If you’re so dedicated to making expensive, high-quality productions you should be using these smaller cheaper shows to save money and fund them, rather than forcing everyone of your fans to pay a monthly subscription fee that I’m sorry, just isnt worth it or is simply unaffordable for the majority of your audience who you have now essentially told aren’t welcome or valued by you. And which one is it?

Such a large percentage of your audience are casual viewers too. Why cut out that completely? What fans are you expecting to follow you to this ? Your most dedicated fans are there because they like Ryan and Shane, so why not push that? Are you trying to appeal to your fans or are you trying to make the content you want. There’s no clear creative direction that makes sense with this move and that’s why people aren’t supporting you.

Also I’m sorry but how can we suddenly trust the content is gonna improve once we start funding it when there’s already been so many missteps both in their content and their business. Look at how many fans have said Ghost Files and Mystery Files have started feeling phoned in. Their patreon has been mismanaged for years, they barely promote it and the perks on there aren't really worth it (but they have 6000 paying members because people can and do want to support them!). They go months having barely any merch. There are ways to make money on youtube, they’re just not doing it well .

And I’m sorry. But there is just absolutely no reason to have 25 employees. Shows like Survival mode should be cheap and easy to produce, and help bring in money to support larger ventures like ghost files. So why are there 18 people credited for a video of you playing Minecraft? And of course I don’t want people to lose their jobs. But continuing with this is going to cause EVERYONE to lose their jobs regardless.

They also barely have a plan for their new content. People watch for Ryan and Shane, you KNOW THAT. So why is your first new big show hiring the worth it boys and doing a globe-trotting, crazily expensive show. Are you even really expanding your content if you’re still sticking to a one-video-a-week schedule with no present plan to change that? They have a survey for subscribers to vote which past show to bring back, but there’s obviously a major budget difference between filming something like Weird Wonderful World and something like SD&D&D… or at least there should be but there isn't when you employ 20 people to make one video. There’s such a clear lack of thought put into it that makes me even less likely to want to support.

I want to say that they probably expected a negative backlash and thought they could just wait it out… but did they? Because WHY did they hype this up like it was an insane new announcement fans would go wild for. WHY do this several days before you have live shows where you let fans ask questions live to your faces? So much of this roll out makes absolutely no sense and makes Ryan, Shane, and Steve look so ridiculously out-of-touch with their fanbase, which only makes fans feel even less supportive.

I think their defenders think we want to see Watcher crash and burn but the majority of us don't. I want them to be successful but this isn't the way to do it and I truly do believe it’s going to ruin their company. Unfortunately as much as I love them, I wont be supporting them.

#watcher #watcher entertainment #ryan bergara #shane madej #steven lim #buzzfeed unsolved #ghost files #mystery files #seriously though... what the hell #i dont even use tumblr anymore but i just had to get my thoughts out #sorry i don’t know how to do the read more function i haven’t properly used tumblr since 2016

591 notes · View notes

bonetrousled · 2 years

Text

the TAPE WOMAN INCIDENT is as follows. under a cut because this is a LONG ass ride

okay so to preface i need u to understand two things

1) i live in the middle of nowhere. i personally live in the middle of a CORNFIELD and it takes me fifteen minutes to drive to where i work and even that location is pretty non-notable. i work on the weekends and it gets pretty dead past 6 pm

2) i had a coworker we’ll call Sheldon who was one of THE worst people i’ve ever met. the most unbearable obtuse cishet white gay guy you can imagine. like “lesbians get too much rep” kind of guy. would follow you around WHILE you did your job stocking shit and talk your ear off to hear his own voice . beyond that he was super weirdly violent. he’d make up stories about himself to sound cool but instead of being like “yeah my dad works at minecraft” he’d make up stories abt himself beating the shit out of people and like. wrenching their hair out.

if anyone else said these things to me i’d be scared shitless but i knew i could take him in a fight but it was still fucking WEIRD. talked abt wanting to hurt a higher-ups kids and he STILL wasn’t fired for that (eventually got fired later thank god) but he constantly did things that were borderline like. budding serial killer behavior ON TOP OF being unbearable to work with and constantly stealing my sales to make my numbers look bad

so. one of my coworkers had to leave early bc she was sick and i was given an ultimatum. i could either A) close alone for the very first time and be by myself for like two hours with no prior warning OR B) have sheldon come and close with me. of course i picked the former with NO hesitation. i figure yeah this is a scary and sudden happenstance but also if i had to be around him any longer id freak the fuck out. plus im like it’s like what. 5pm already? it’s not gonna be bad. i can deal w this.

so i’m sitting in the back alone and relaxing and whatever. i did everything i needed to do for the rest of the night earlier and since nobody was in the store i was just new boot goofing. the only thing of note that happens is that these middle school age boys come in and buy perms and leave. they will be back later

i go back to the back room and i’m enjoying myself when i hear the door ding so i go up to the front. in comes the omen: a woman in a tank top, coated in orange spray tan, with a bedazzled cross necklace. she’s the normal amount of annoying for any given Customer Interaction. HOWEVER

i go to cash her out. and i’m waiting for her to press a button on the card scanner but i don’t get the chance to be like “hey you need to do this for me to even start scanning your shit” because she begins telling me about an experience she just had

she goes “well. just so you know, i saw a woman in this parking lot, and she was sort of peering around into people’s cars, and she came up to me- and her face was ALL taped up.” so at this point im thinking like. gauze?? medical tape??

and she continues- “and she wanted a ride. so i said, okay, and i let her into my car. and she wanted a smoothie”

(i have to interject here to say there is NOWHERE to get a smoothie near me. i have no idea what she’s talking about)

“so i took her to the smoothie place. she also had a BIG bag of carrots, and she wanted them to put the carrots in there. so they did, but then she decided she wanted them to remake the drink because they touched the carrots. anyway, i decided that was too much, so i had to drop her off. i let her go at starbucks, so, you know. if you see her, BE CAREFUL.”

okay so let’s unpack this. FIRSTLY i have had a woman made up to me. this is completely unbelievable from start to finish. i have no fucking idea what she’s talking about . SECONDLY: BE CAREFUL??

so i’m just like. sure this might as well happen . and i’m just like “ooh. um. haha yeah okay” and finally get to scanning her shit. and she goes to leave and stops at the door and her face falls as she STARES at me and whispers:

“i don’t know if you believe in this sort of thing, but i think god is watching. ALL the time. and i think he really, really wanted me to give her that smoothie. but i just COULDN’T do it.”

and she fucking leaves . so i’m just left there like 🧍 and i go sit back in the back. and im chilling out back there when i hear the door ding, so i go up and i’m greeted by the perm boys. they forgot some stuff they needed, so i’m like. ok cool no prob, heres what you need. while i’m helping them i hear the door ding again, but i’m helping the perm boys, so i figure i’ll finish with them and then see who came in and what they need.

we go to walk up to the register and someone’s facing away from us in the aisle. so i’m like “oh um excuse me! just gotta sneak past ya” and the Person turns around.

the tape woman. imagine if you will a lady with her ENTIRE HEAD wrapped in duct tape like the INVISIBLE FUCKING MAN. with a hole cut out in the duct tape for her mouth but NONE FOR HER EYES . there’s a single tape hole right next to her nose that she’s using to look out at me and in order to see me she has to lean all the way back to look at me with it . ADDITIONALLY she is carrying a fucking DUFFEL BAG that’s OPENED and filled with LOOSE BABY CARROTS

so while my heart takes a fastpass route straight to my stomach i am faced with a MYRIAD of realizations:

FIRSTLY the tape woman is fucking real. the omen i was given not even an hour earlier had come to pass and she was now in my store. SECONDLY i am the only person working. i can’t even look at anyone and be like HEY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON because my only witnesses are the goddamn PERM BOYS and THIRDLY i have to act like her head is NOT in fact covered in duct tape because like. i dont know what the hell is going on i think if i react in any way i will be in danger

so the tape woman scoots out of the way and i check the perm boys out. and they BOOK IT out of the store . so i am now left alone with the tape woman

and i’m like <:) ..... do you. um. need any help with finding anything? and the tape lady turns around and she points at a bottle and goes. “is this shampoo?” and i’m like “ohhh um no that’s color sealer. this is shampoo here” and like. despite looking 100% like she was going to axe murder me she was one of the nicest people i had dealt with all day. she was just like “oh okay! thank you”.

and she asks me how much is so i tell her and she’s like oh alright. i only have five bucks on me right now so i’m gonna go into the parking lot and see if i can find any money. and i felt bad because like. i was going to offer to pay but the registers don’t let you cash yourself out if you’re ringing on them so i was just like “oh! alright!”

so she leaves and comes back a minute or two later and she’s very nicely just like “oh um don’t worry about it, i’m not gonna get anything today. have a nice night” and im like oh you too! and she leaves. and i watch through the front window as she goes to leave and this guy gives her like 20 bucks . so i’m thinking “oh she’s gonna come back and buy it right”

she comes back into the door. and stops in the doorway and she says to me

“um, don’t worry about it, actually. i’m not gonna get that right now-“

and she lowers her voice before going:

“because i have to pray. and if the prayer turns out RIGHT. i will come back. and i will buy it.”

and she LEAVES without a second word. did not even see her in the PARKING LOT for the rest of the NIGHT . i have asked MULTIPLE PEOPLE who work in the same plaza if they encountered this lady and NOBODY HAS. i asked the people at STARBUCKS and they say they haven’t ever seen her. my ONLY witnesses are these middle schoolers trying to get perms. i have been thinking about this at least once a day since the event has happened. i haven’t even seen the first lady who warned me about her since. i think i was contacted by spirits or something

tldr two separate women channel god in a beauty supply store in the middle of country bumpkin nowhere at 7:30 pm while i closed alone

#txt

4K notes · View notes

myslvtwritings · 10 months

Text

Playing minecraft headcanons with the uppermoons (+Muzan & Enmu)

this will be a modern!AU (they’re still demons tho)

•

(this is also my first post lmao)

Muzan

okay it takes a HELL ton of convincing to have Muzan himself play with you.

he views any sort of game as ‘dumb’ or ‘childish’

you try to remind him that it’s not in the slightest but it doesn’t do anything much (bro is stubborn)

he’s the demon king? why should he associate himself with the idiotic games mortals play?

eventually he goes give in (bc he loves you in his own weird demonic way..)

strictly on survival mode. doesn’t care what you do but he sees creative mode as a ‘easy way out’ and he wants to be a hard ass (no surprises here)

kills any mob in sight and any mob that comes near you (claims he does it because he’s the demon king and wants to overpower everything and everyone but in reality he just wants to look out for you)

loses his SHIT when he gets dies in the game (triggers his fear of death lol)

you made a joke about him being like the mobs in minecraft because they burn in the sunlight (like him)

he doesn’t play with you after that but he secretly enjoyed spending time with you! (shh, you’ll never hear it from him)

Kokushibo

doesn’t take too much convincing (thank god)

he lowkey enjoys trying out new things with you! you’ve always done everything for him so the least he can do is return the favor.

probably doesn’t really understand it at first so you gotta explain the game to him

gets frustrated easily in the game but it’s more of a silent rage. you take notice of it because his body language changes so it’s not exactly difficult to spot.

like muzan he’ll kill anything that goes near you. (he’s protective even in the game)

most likely will envy your game abilities. (it’s okay you’ll teach him!)

you find it cute that he’s so serious about it sometimes

The both of y’all share jobs in the game and end up creating a lovely little house!

spoiler alert he burns it down after he finds out you can burn things in the game. he did it for no reason whatsoever.

you don’t really mind all that much though. you’re just grateful you got to play with him!

Douma

douma loves and i mean LOVES playing with you!!

this man is bored. (like all the time) so doing something like this will definitely keep him occupied! but he may grow bored quickly because that’s just how he is.

he still adores playing with you though and wants to do it again!

he’ll praise you for how great you are at the game. literally head over heals for you<33

the type of mf to pick up a flower (specifically a rose) and drop it at your feet in the game.

pouts like a toddler when you don’t notice it:((

“Y/N?! didn’t you see the flower i dropped right in front of you!”

he’s clingy even in the game and will follow you around EVERYWHERE.

he is jealous of your building skills and begs you to build him a house💀

Douma’s fav biome is probably the ice plains spikes biome. anything that has to do with snow or ice!

he too also gets frustrated in the game sometimes and SUCKS at hiding it. he doesn’t have outbursts though (surprisingly)

most likely will rizz you up even in the fucking game😭

then after like a few hours of playing he gets bored and either wants to eat (women) or cuddle with you. (maybe both)

Akaza

Akaza is the most interesting to play with out of them all (because he’s just so goofy when playing)

the only thing that’s annoying is that he’ll chase danger quite literally for fun. he will fight anything. I MEAN ANYTHING.

i pity the mobs who (tried) to attack you..

game rage? it’s in his veins. (it’s semi-amusing to witness him get pissed off)

make sure he doesn’t punch a hole in your TV or your computer (whatever you play on) that shits expensive.

like during his battles bro uses only his fists to kill everything. weapons? nah. pro is anti-weapons. uses his fists for quite literally everything and will throw a fit when he dies.

he’ll praise you whenever you kill anything though! (he’s a sweetheart like that)

he’s like a guard dog even in the silly game. (over protective is an understatement)

he attempts to build you a house (it isn’t too horrible, surprisingly)

one time when the two of you were mining deep within the caves for diamonds Akaza found some and broke/mined it with his fist. (you got so pissed)

he apologized and found you some new ones though! thankfully, he didn’t use his fists to break the block this time.

overall, Akaza really does enjoy playing with you! he grows fond of it and now playing minecraft with him is one of y’all’s favorite things to do together<33

Hantengu Clones

(i’m writing the four of them all together because i’m lazy)

want to know what’s more than chaotic? playing some challenging game with 4 very emotional demons.

At first Sekido immediately rejects the idea of playing the game with you and his three other brothers (the hantengu clones are brothers in this AU)

After a shit ton of persistent begging from you and Karaku and Urogi he only submits in the end and plays (mostly because of you)

Karaku and Urogi literally are beefing the entire time (Sekido’s rage is at it’s boiling point because of those two jackasses)

Aizetsu cries like a baby whenever he accidentally kills anything (except for the mobs)

whenever he sees a mob his scaredy-cat ass sprints away in the opposite direction.

Urogi and Karaku bully him RELENTLESSLY for this. (Aizetsu is a victim)

Urogi is the type to secretly go into creative mode grab a shit tone of diamonds or netherite and is like; “Heyy, lookie what i found!!”

no one falls for his bullishit.

they all protect you in the game and show off in front of you. (it’s embarrassing)

Karaku is surprisingly good at the game but like Akaza he’ll chase danger for fun.

Aizetsu only feels safe around you so he’ll follow you around and cling to you in the game so his two brothers stop harassing him.

Sekido only plays for a few minutes before getting aggravated and just abandoning the game as a whole.

(he is the type to punch everyone playing the game. even you sometimes but Karaku and Urogi mostly fall victim to his attacks)

Sekido surprisingly leaves Aizetsu alone.

the five of you try to create a world where it’s just peaceful (Keep on dreaming, kid. that ain’t happening)

everything goes downhill, half of the world is ENTIRELY demolished and all of you died over 1000 times.

playing with all of them is too chaotic. you can’t really take it seriously. You only can when you’re playing with one of the clones one on one.

y’all didn’t play again after that madness. 😭

Gyutaro

now Gyutaro here is the only chill one to play with. (finally a normal one)

like Kokushibo, it doesn’t take that much convincing! in fact, he agrees to it almost immediately.

at first he is confused and doesn’t understand how to play minecraft but he is a quick learner and figures it out on his own.

Gyutaro doesn’t have a preference for survival or creative mode. He just does whatever you want.

Whenever y’all play in a survival world you two share tasks and duties and actually create a pretty decent looking world!

he still has your back though. Will kill any mobs that interfere with his little home he created with you.

he enjoys building houses and is surprisingly really amazing at it! he finds comfort in building.

however, whenever you, Daki and Gyutaro all play together it’s mostly him and Daki arguing and being all competitive. It’s mostly Daki’s fault because she’s the cause for half of the mayhem that happens in the world.

sometimes Gyutaro plays even without you. (he grew fond of the game quickly and likes the game)

the both of you play together everyday and go onto the same world every time because y’all created a beautiful old-fashioned city on there. (he cherishes it immensely and is insanely proud of the masterpiece of a world the two of you made as a team)

Daki

Daki is infuriatingly annoying but also entertaining to play with at the same time.

she is a giant rage quitter like Sekido and Akaza.

throws tantrums frequently over the smallest things that go wrong in the game.

she will be jealous of any item you get that’s better than hers.

this lil shit steals everything you earn that’s better than what she has. (you notice every time)

you confront her about it and she has the audacity to lie. (like girl yk damn well)

you end up taking your stuff back and she will BATTLE you for it. (you win these matches every time. that alone only adds to her angered state😭)

she will deliberately quit whenever something doesn’t go her way but later come back and declares she wants to try again.

it’s like a endless loop because this happens every. single. time.

(she’s such a brat istg)

will always steal your diamonds and put them in her chest and say she found them first.

while you’re asleep she will secretly go into the world and take all your shit and you’ll wake up back at square one.

(lowkey you want to stop playing with her)

y’all barely even work as a team but when y’all it’s always ha fight (mostly her fault btw)

once she notices your frustrations. She’ll level it down for you so no need to worry! (this earns your respect)

but whenever y’all are in creative mode shes so much more fun and enjoyable to play with!

you two usually build big ass mansions together and with y’all’s godly building skills you two make an incredible looking house and live in it together!

Enmu

Enmu absolutely looooves doing everything with you! he says yes immediately when you ask him to play with you.

after all he’s your personal simp. this fucker will gladly do whatever you say w/o any hesitation.

Enmu has actually heard of the game ‘minecraft’ before but never actually played it and barely knew what it was really about.

oh boy, but when he does he becomes OBSESSED.

I kinda feel like he dislikes survival mode and prefers to be in creative mode! but if you like survival mode he won’t mind trying it out with you.

he likes killing the animals for fun.. will randomly slaughter anything even if it has a family (bro is a sadist after all)

you tell him it’s not necessary to be doing that but he doesn’t care nor listen.

his love language is building you trains in the game. (you love them very much)

Enmu is usually very calm when he’s not on a mission so playing this game only soothes him further and he doesn’t act overly crazy and zesty like he usually does around Muzan

Builds trains every time y’all play and is somehow INSANELY skilled when building them (??)

Similar to douma, he’s the type to rizz you up in the game.

Sulks when you don’t notice him when he attempts to.

He constantly nags you to play with him some more and gets a lil upset when you become tired.

“Oh, Y/N!, how can you be tired? we’re having soooo much fun!!”

forces you to stay up just so he can introduce you his own train world he made for himself. (he named all the trains)

you’re out cold after playing with him every time. High key finds it adorable when you pass out after hours of playing with him. He’s so amused how humans can grow tired so easily.

659 notes · View notes

askdacast · 4 months

Text

Life Series SMP/Eyes and Ears AU Thematic Discussion + Theorycrafting (pt. 1)

WARNING: Extremely long post

Kachow what’s poppin fellas, I’m back at it again talking about boomer block Youtubers and their surprisingly in-depth improv series. Now that the Life Series’ 5th season has finally concluded, I’m back on the lore train and poor Scar is left to suffer the consequences, and Martyn’s concluded yet another lore stream, I decided to compile a long master post of lore notes and theories about what we have so far.

Obviously all the ‘lore’ of the Life Series is purely unofficial; Grian has not approved any of it as being actually official/set in stone for what he intended the series to be. Most of it has been us in the crazy fandom extrapolating their really good storytelling, and also “semi-canonized” by Martyn in what he calls the Eyes and Ears AU (and this post assumes you are familiar with it). As someone who’s been a fan since the beginning way back in 3rd Life, I’ve pretty much hopped on the lore train since the beginning as well (if casually) and enjoying all the different extrapolations/analysis/angst written around the players. Rather than just theorizing lore details in a vacuum, however, I’ve always liked imagining the lore based around the reoccurring themes, symbolism and arcs we’ve seen across the series. I’d been bouncing my various thoughts and theories around these themes for a while, and finally I decided to compile my notes together.

This post is basically my imagining what the Life Series/Eyes and Ears AU story is “about,” as if it were a fleshed-out, long-running and story-driven tv show. Initially this post started as simply a gigantic “Eyes and Ears Theory,” me trying to sus out my own theories/ideas of what the Life Series’ mysteries were based on Martyn’s lore. However, considering that Martyn is ALSO writing the lore on the fly, and I have some details I would interpret differently or change, this ended up less a ‘theory’ and more ‘me writing an entire AU/interpretation of the Life Series as a whole.’ My intention is NOT to ‘correct’ Martyn’s lore, nor to claim my theory as the ‘right’ interpretation; rather, this is my personal interpretation of what the Life Series story is about, based on information shown in the original SMP and in Martyn’s AU.

One last disclaimer: I am ONLY drawing on lore details from the Life Series, Martyn’s lore streams, and Minecraft EVO, and also references to the iRL creators. I am not drawing on any story from other SMPs such as Pirates or Empires; there may be some Hermitcraft references here and there.

This is going to be very long, and a multi-parter, because I can’t summarize to save my life. And I promise I’ll come up with a proper name for my series of posts another time. If you’ve stuck around to read, I thank you.

Part 1: The Overall Plot + Understanding the Watchers

Recap of official lore details

Although Martyn hasn’t given specific details on the Watcher + Listener species (he hasn’t come up with a name yet), we know the following details for sure (from EVO, lore streams etc.)

Watchers + Listeners + The Council are all deity-like beings of the same species, and they all consume human emotions

The Council are the upper ranks/possibly leaders, whereas the Watchers + Listeners are separate factions

The Watchers are at LEAST two high-ranking members of the species (the two dots being outcast from the wider circle, as is their logo)

The Watchers were behind Minecraft EVO, where they gave all the players tasks (much like Secret Life) and eventually ending in them fighting the Ender Dragon separately

While the Watchers may not have been evil in EVO, they certainly became so AFTER, when they began to crave more negative human emotions, viewing them as “tasty” (Martyn’s words), s p i c y

They first kidnapped Grian at the end of EVO season 1, turning him into a Watcher to possibly have him join their ranks, but he’s gone rogue after realizing what their plans for the Life Series were, and plans to rescue his friends from them

The Life Series was the Watchers’ ploy to trap the players in an infinite death game where they betray and cause each other pain, all to harvest their negative emotions. Grian, in defiance to this, takes control as the ‘game master’ to make the whole thing…well, a game, so that his friends can enjoy, have fun and ease their anguish. In Martyn’s words, this is like “pouring ketchup all over the Watchers’ sundae.”

The Listeners (EVO season 2) are an opposing faction to the Watchers who disagree with their methods, although why is unknown. They’ve attempted to contact some players (e.g. Jimmy) before back in EVO in order to oppose the Watchers, but it’s not known how successful they were. They’ve also tried to swap in players in the Life Series before (e.g. subbing Lizzie and Gem for Pearl and Cleo in Lim. Life) in order to sneak them in and try to subvert the game. The Watchers kidnapping Gem for Secret Life is partially in retaliation to the Listeners. The Listeners may not be good and may have nefarious intentions also, it is as yet still unknown.

There’s potentially a third faction, the Speakers, but very little is known about them and Martyn doesn’t want to elaborate on them yet.

Okay, but what are the Watchers even after?

"Accept your fate."

From here on out is my real conjecturing/theorizing. The main question on my mind has been why are the Watchers doing what they’re doing? Obviously Martyn has confirmed that they are malicious deities who find negative human emotions tasty, but this raises further questions. Why exactly do they desire such emotions, or need them to survive (if they do, anyway)? Why do they favour negativity, when the other members of their species consume a wide range of emotions? They were confirmed to be outcast in some way from the other factions for this ploy, so what does that say about them then?

The whole species fundamentally do not understand human emotions (or perhaps do not even possess them)

This seems to me the most logical conclusion. These are powerful deities who can create miniature worlds/dimensions, life, and time to an extent (death loop). They should theoretically be self-sufficient, so I doubt that their consumption of human emotion is for survivability reasons (i.e. I don’t think Watchers will literally die if they don’t consume emotions, the same way humans die without food). What seems more likely is that human emotions bring them some benefit to their intelligence or power that they’d otherwise be quite non-functional without. (Think like the demons in The Promised Neverland, who regress to feral natures/lack of sapience if they don’t eat humans)

The Watchers’ powers and their lab-rat experimentation on the players gives a huge vibe of not being able to understand human emotions in an involved way, but only from a distance. They know methodically things like murder and betrayal cause panic and anguish, so they enforce these experiences through the game, mechanics like the Boogeyman, the Secret Tasks etc. But they don’t really know internally why these emotions come about the way humans do. Being above time, they probably don’t understand why the funny small animals have so much attachment to their transitory experiences and memories (more on this later).

world's angriest pumpkin

The Watchers are Losers, Actually

Going further, don’t you think the Watchers have a very misanthropic mindset all around? “Anguish and panic are s p i c y.” They conversely have a complete disgust for positive emotions, and can’t stand Grian making things fun for everybody. It almost feels like they have the mindset that only things like hatred and fear are exciting, bringing motivation and life to the humans, whereas things like happiness and fun are ‘useless’ because they don’t bring about the same results. Let’s also not forget their name – Watchers – and that Martyn’s confirmed them to be symbolically based off us, the audience. It’s almost like a commentary of the worst of the entertainment industry, of an audience who crave watching anything and everything to satisfy their own desires, even at the expense of the privacy and safety of the entertainer. Given the current state of the internet and social media, I don’t think I need to elaborate how awful things can get.

In other words, I believe the main motivation the Watchers are eating humans emotions is because they WANT to understand and ‘take into themselves’ such emotions. I don’t think they’re totally emotionless – Martyn does portray them with moments of glee and anger. But their understanding of emotions is superficial (self-centered, if you will) at best. As deities with no needs, being above time, they have nothing to be afraid of and nothing to feel sad or anguished over. It’s a boring, dull and empty existence. And that’s precisely why they’ve set up the Life Series game: by kidnapping a few humans and putting them through the artificially constructed wringer of panic and betrayal, they think they can create a human farm of such rich, complex and exciting emotions, all for themselves to enjoy at their own pleasure and fill the void they have.

(Listeners’ side note: If all that is the philosophy of the Watchers, it’s probably not difficult to see how/why the Listeners oppose them. The Listeners likely disagree that negative emotions are the most optimal state of humans, and unlike the Watchers do not think human suffering is just tasty popcorn one can eat at one’s pleasure. Their name – Listeners – implies they’re a more sympathetic faction, as in they listen to one’s troubles and heart rather than take delight in suffering at a superficial level. But if they are the same species, it’s very likely they have the same lack of instinctive understanding of human emotions that the Watchers do, and this could cause…problems.)

Why turn Grian?

All this is also why I believe the Watchers kidnapped Grian + turned him into a Watcher in the first place. Firstly, if they were going to concoct their plan to trap humans, they needed a collaborator from the humans in the first place. Secondly, and most importantly, this collaborator was going to be their only direct source of how human emotions work/feel like, and therefore what were the most optimal conditions needed to ensure their death game would generate the most pain and anguish. They picked Grian because he’s always the ‘leader’ of the SMP players, the person gathering and organizing everyone, so logically, he is the most ‘representative’ of the humans, and the one with the greatest ability to control them.

Of course, it’s also true that Grian was a little $#@% throughout EVO and actively rebelled against the Watchers’ tasks, so making him their collaborator might seem strange. Ignoring the meta reason that the ending was written to explain Grian’s exit from the series. But I figured in this case, they considered the benefits more than the costs. Grian’s chaotic nature is not unlike the Watchers’, considering how much he loves causing pranks and trouble to others. So, as a huge oversight, they think Grian is just like them: he loves to see people suffer, so they think. Additionally, the Watchers are desperate to understand how Grian gets his fellow humans to follow him and do what he asks with little effort. You’ll notice the Watchers have very direct, authoritative ways of trying to wrest control (e.g. the tasks, “do this or you fail”), and they get very petty and upset when people rebel against them (re: Scott’s refusal to be the Boogeyman, their motto is a very demanding “OUR WILL BE DONE.”) They see Grian’s charisma as yet another aspect of human emotions they fail to understand and thus WANT to possess for themselves.

Pictured above: The Watchers, coping and seething

Of course as we know, the Watchers believing Grian would help them is a major oversight. Becoming a god doesn’t just fundamentally change who Grian is, and he definitely doesn’t want to consign his friends to an infinite death loop of suffering. That being said, I don’t think Grianhas truly gone ‘rogue’ so much as taken as much advantage as possible of his ‘deal’ with the Watchers. We can guess the Watchers promised to him some kind of control/leadership over his friends’ circumstances as long as he worked for them, which led to them giving him the keys to the Life Series. In other words, so long as he fulfils their requirements of things being a death game that will generate ‘food’ for them, and lets them revive everyone each loop, he gets to decide how the games go.

And we know exactly what Grian’s done with this: he created the green-yellow-red lives system, he creates a fun gimmick each season, he inserts himself into the game as a player, all to bring out the best and most creative side of his friends rather than the worst. The Boogeyman probably is the only gimmick the Watchers added on their own initiative (re: Martyn’s POV in Last Life) in order to make things more spicy. Probably Grian’s conversation with the Watchers each time goes, “hey, I got an idea on how to bring out the most creative ways for everyone to cause pain in each other, [comes up with some bullcrap justification for the game’s fun mechanics].” I like to think the Watchers were going to make the death games even more vicious, cruel and competitive, but because of Grian’s wrangling he’s convinced them that a slow burn from joy to horror creates better results, and they tolerate it as long as they see him useful.

Memories and Emotions

There is also one BIG detail of the Watchers’ plan I’d like to mention: Martyn claims that the Watchers do NOT erase the players’ memories. At the end of each season, they consume everyone’s emotions so that there’s no more angst/ill will towards each other, and they start each season afresh. The players remember what’s happened in past seasons, but they don’t continue to hold the pain and negative feelings they had towards each other.

I don’t buy this, for numerous reasons.

For one, Martyn has confirmed the Watchers ARE capable of removing people’s memories. The one memory they have outright altered was the ex-EVO players’ (Martyn, Jimmy, BigB etc.) memory of what happened to Grian: they don’t remember that Grian was taken to be turned into a Watcher, and instead remember it as him either going missing or dying after the Ender Dragon fight. All this presumably to not give away the Watchers’ schemes and to ensure they still listen to Grian as if nothing ever happened.

More importantly, however, memories are vital to humanity’s emotional experience and mental health. I am not an expert by any means, but there are studies showing how people with amnesia, PTSD or other conditions affecting memories have flashbacks/emotional reactions to trauma they don’t remember consciously. The Watchers have (supposedly) done something far more simplistic yet fantastic by just eating up everybody’s emotions. All this, even though they see humans as emotion factories, constantly able to generate emotions just by existing, by their ability to draw and create meaning through emotional experiences, and by creating memories – the clearest embodiment of a mortal’s attachment to time (which if you remember, I believe the Watchers have no concept of).

You cannot just tell a human to stop feelingcompletely (under normal circumstances anyway), but especially not if they remember something very very traumatic.

Besides, there ARE clear instances when some of the players remember the events of past seasons and are STILL not over them! Impulse and Tango still being bitter/distrustful after Bdubs betrayed each of them separately, Cleo distrusting BigB for the same reason, Scott referencing Flower Husbands a lot, Pearl feeling betrayed by Cleo/Scott when they supposedly broke up the Gaslight/Gatekeep/Girlboss trio at the start of DL, Bdubs’ “I wanna be your favorite son” in Secret Life, the list goes on. Note that I’ve only listed negative/bittersweet instances; there are plenty more cases of the players remembering past seasons and alliances positively which the Watchers may have ignored. The point is, if the Watchers truly consumed everyone’s emotions to the point of a clean slate, they haven’t exactly been thorough. Nor do I think it’s very conducive for them either – don’t they want players to have enduring, unending, unresolved pain, the sweetest of all (to them)?

No, I think the Watchers HAVE been erasing/suppressing the players’ memories – they’ve just been very selective which ones. Martyn’s said that the Watchers do not care what families or connections they separate so long as they get the people they want and the plans they want. I’m going to assume the players in my theory/the Eyes and Ears AU are exactly the same as their CC counterparts. In other words: they’ve stolen Grian away from his wife. They stole Martyn away from his and his daughter. Ditto with Skizz, Impulse, Tango etc. They stole Scar away from his family. Joel and Lizzie are the only couple they didn’t separate, perhaps because they needed both for their plans, and also so they can inflict the most torture on them by ripping them away from each other, over and over again. And in order to ensure the complete submissiveness of the players to the game, the Watchers have taken away their memories of their past lives, their families, basically anyone who isn’t a fellow player in the game. The Watchers don’t erase the memories of bonds between seasons, because it’s a pain to have to teach the humans how to play all over again, but they erase any memories they find disadvantageous to keeping the game running.

They might even go one step further: while they haven’t erased the players’ memories of who each other are (so as to not cause confusion), they do try to suppress important memories. Things like how they met, the times they confided in each other after a bad day, cried on each other’s shoulder, laughed in each other’s successes, the times they hung out with each other’s families. Imagine the different alliances constantly gravitating to each other, but never being able to remember why they care about each other so much. Imagine Bdubs’ “Come on, you know you and I go way back!” when trying to justify taking Cleo’s stuff, and Cleo laughs back, even though she can’t quite remember what exactly Bdubs has done to warrant that. Imagine Joel or Lizzie trying to remember why they loved each other so much.

They fight and kill some of their friends, and protect others, because…because why again? It’s for survival value, surely, so the Watchers whisper. It’s because the strong must congregate with the strong and leave the weak to die, surely. It’s because Martyn’s always been a loner, and always will be, and should remain so. So they tell him. So they whisper, this is a deathmatch for a reason.

Grian’s Fundamental Rebellion

I think all this is the real reason Grian is rebelling against the Watchers. The most immediate reason is obvious: he wants to free his friends from this death loop. But the deeper reason as to why he’s rebelled is that the Watchers are torturing and robbing his friends of their humanity. They’re taking a tight-knit group of friends who love and would do anything for each other, and turning them against each other in a cruel and unescapable death game. On TOP of this, the Watchers have constantly messed with their heads in order to make them obedient and submissive to their schemes and the worst of their human nature, trapping them in fear, pettiness and paranoia. Of course Grian is upset. Of course he wants to save them from this fate. It’s an insult to who he knows these people to be.

This all leaves Grian in a pretty precarious position. While outwardly the Watchers want to make him a lackey as the “game master”, both he and they know he really wants to save his friends (they probably see it as their ‘cattle’ showing a bit of resistance, which once again they need to suppress). And while on one hand he’s making the games fun to ease his friends’ pain and bring the best out of them, this is just a hotfix rather than a real solution. In order to really rescue the players, Grian’s got to get them to rebel against the Watchers as well. Refuse to play by the rules, by the expectation that they must murder and kill without mercy, without any attachment to their alliances or past friendships. Make everyone like Scott refusing to be the Boogeyman, or Skizz constantly trying to be wholesome (until the bloodlust gets the better of him anyway).

Ironically in order to achieve this, Grian’s best bet is to try to jog everyone’s lost memories of each other and the things they lost, both good and bad. But ultimately, this is going to make them (in the short term) suffer more. This is where you can insert all your Desert Duo/Flower Husband/whatever alliance you like most angst. But more practically, I like to imagine when “the cameras” are not watching, when Grian knows no one will notice or catch him, he sneaks around to the different alliances, even the ones he’s not part of, to ask them how they’re doing, if they remember anything from the past etc. (in a meta sense, the players edit and cut stuff from their videos all the time; who’s to say he isn’t trying to catch a quick chat while everyone’s mining?!) It also reflects in why Grian is constantly trying to make alliances with different people instead of just gravitate to one person, he needs to check on everyone and capitalize on every single opportunity. (besides the meta reason, being that cc!Grian wants to be creative, and sticking to the same person all the time isn’t very entertaining from a content creator perspective)

One last detail about the winners: I don’t have much to say about the fragments yet, because Martyn (sneaky boi) hasn’t yet revealed the significance of the fragments nor of their healing, although he has hinted Bad Things™ will happen if a player gets too fragmented. But I do think the winners are important: with the game finished, they give Grian a very short window of time to talk to one person directly, without Watcher interference. They’re always the last to be killed/swept away/revived by the Watchers, and I can imagine there’s a brief period of time when their souls are being transferred to The Void w/e where Grian can step in and interfere. In my theory, Grian passes on some sort of clue/push to the winners, as like a subtle message about what they can do to stand up to the Watchers. I’ll detail on what I think these individual messages were in part 2. Needless to say, 3rd Life was a traumatic experience for Grian for many reasons, but the nail in the coffin was the fact that he won, and therefore there was no way for him to pass a message onto anyone.

Conclusion

Hooooooo jeepers that was long @A@; Thank you so much for your patience reading this if you made it to the end, I really appreciate it. As I said, I’ve had these lore ideas bouncing in my head for a LONG time, and with the end of Secret Life I couldn’t get out of my head the different trends/symbolism that was popping out of an improv series. It honestly speaks a lot to how genius our favorite block dudes are at improv, that they can turn their improv nonsense into a coherent narrative. I really wanted to try my hand at fleshing out such a narrative, and with Martyn constantly drip-feeding lore to the fans, I had more than enough material to not just put out guesses but construct something a full XYZ. As I mentioned, I enjoy workshopping themes and characters a LOT more than just worldbuilding or “what if this or that” details in a vacuum, hence why I’ve written all that I have, so this was a fun exercise for me all around!

Next time in part 2 I talk about Character Development™, or character specific notes and details I’ve noticed and extrapolated from what we’ve seen of each individual player, as well as what their different arcs across the seasons mean for them within the lore. Stay tuned for another wordbarf!

Bonus list of works I was inspired by for this loredump:

Log Horizon

The Promised Neverland

Danganronpa (ironic as I’m not really a fan of this franchise, but the first game has an otherwise solid premise which I found really similar to the Life Series)

The Fate franchise (when Martyn asked “what’s Fate?” on the latest lore stream, let me tell you I couldn’t stop laughing; NO MARTYN DON’T GO INTO THE WEEB RABBIT HOLE)

Various amazing animatics from the Traffic fandom: Earth, Bang!, most of Melloz Heist’s works, and of course all the amazing fanart

Way too many conversations with my friends about fantasy species

#what have I done #trafficblr #traffic life #traffic smp #life series smp #life series #eyesandears #eyes and ears theory #inthelittlewood #thematic discussion #theorycrafting #3rd life smp #last life smp #double life smp #limited life smp #secret life smp #long post

91 notes · View notes

mynameisnotsoda · 2 months

Text

NOW INTRODUCING.... THE CRITTERS !!!

Technically Corvid is still a part of an au, i really like everyone's designs so i guess its just like a weird little au that are also kinda ocs?? Idk. Im still tagging it as the animatronicfication au and using the other ccs names but im completely separating wilbur from Corvid.

The one that probably changed the most is simp LMAO i just went back to his old design that was inspired by Luna (@starrixle's transfem simpbur turned oc) and Spencer is such a fitting name in my mind i literally can not imagine him with a different name *bwomp*

Also I'm working on refs for the other characters associated with the respective critters! I wanna finish them all and dump them into one post and I'll link it here when I'm done.

ANYWAY INFODUMP TIME

Before we go into individual characters i want to say that this is absolutely Minecraft. Like. The world is built off of Minecraft lore yk !!!! The overworld will still be called the overworld but it's basically just earth, with more magic and humanoid species! Along with supernatural creatures and cryptids n stuff :D also with more advanced tech considering Corvid exists pFF

Spencer for the most part kinda was like he is in canon or whatever. She used to lean more towards incel ideology because she was REALLY insecure and uncomfortable with herself for the longest time. Despite that, Spencer and Adrianne (egirl) started dating when they were 17, his unhealthy obsession with her was only fueled by her unhealthy attachment to him. They needed each other and it wasn't good for either of them. Spencer had developed horrible separation anxiety which only made things worse. Over time Adrianne became suffocated by his constant neediness, overwhelming insecurity, short temper and lack of contribution to household chores. It pained her to leave, but things needed to change. It wasn't until the breakup that Spencer met Shepard, who was his first irl friend in a long time. They met when they were around 22/23, at first Spencer just used Shepard as a distraction from Adrianne, especially since he was surprised that they wanted to even be his friend in the first place. But after a while he genuinely started to enjoy their company, plus they offered him really good advice and helped him through a gender/sexuality crisis. Eventually they became partners! Maybe not romantically, as they're both aromantic, but life partners nonetheless.

OH and i did make Spencer white/Salvadoran. Her mom is the first generation from immigrant parents while her dad is British; And her dad's younger brother is Adam's dad! He's also an ex-christian, he left due to religious trauma and moved to America to escape his family hA

Spencer's also a no sabo kid LMAO (he knows some words/phrases but other than that he cant speak Spanish to save his life)

ALSO ALSO. Oh my god i could talk about Spence all day LMAO but i made him a werewolf !!!! Hes SOO jealous of Adam because she wanted the cat genes but instead got bitten and turned into a werewolf as a teenager. She's done a pretty good job at hiding it from her family so Shepard's the only one who knows.

I already dumped everything about Adam into that other post, so I don't really have much else to add. HOWEVER !! Him and Spence are cousins now :3 Adam doesn't get to meet Spencer in person until he moves to America with Charlie & co, but he does follow her socials with his secret accounts that his parents don't know about. The only reason they know they're cousins is because Spencer's dad told her so and she reached out! Much to the dismay of Adam's parents but they've secretly kept in touch online.

Keith's pretty much stayed the same apart from a slight design revamp. Although I've made him a little older since originally i made him look young. But then I decided hes a dad so i started drawing him older for the asks pFF he also has a hooked nose now! In case it's not obvious. Keith got married to Jean VERY young, they were maybe 17/18 in human years. It was an arranged marriage and their only goal was to have an heir to the throne. Well they did, they had two kids, the eldest being a boy named Lune and the youngest being a girl named Sunny, who's the would be heir. Until Jean took both the kids and left. It was completely unprompted and left everyone in the kingdom confused, especially Keith. Sure, they had a loveless marriage and maybe he was insufferable at times, but he wanted to make it work if not for the kids then for the kingdom! But its been almost a year since she left, he's lost hope in ever finding her. Keith desperately wants his kids back, not because Sunny is the rightful heir— though that is part of it—but he loves them both dearly. He misses them the most.

Wilfred has pretty much stayed the same as well! I did give him a grey tshirt and darker hair to further distance his design from wilbur though. Hes just as unhinged and immoral as he used to be !!!! Nothing has changed aside from appearance actually.

Tobi also pretty much stayed the same except for its now got an orange jumper and lighter brown hair pFF although i do now have a story for him! Tobi was found by Alejandro in a storage auction, he managed to sell a lot of pretty valuable things from there but Tobi stood out, obviously, so he kept it. Alejandro is a travel vlogger and lives in an RV with his friends: Tomas, Philip and Charles. His friends just call him Alex. Anyway, they go from town to town trying local food, visiting tourists traps and vlogging the journey! While doing that they also try to find out how to get Tobi's memories back and possibly turn him human again, if they even can. So far they haven't had much luck but maybe one day...

Corvid was created as the backup singer and lead guitarist of the first all animatronic band! Brought to you by Beloved Entertainment! The other members include lead singer Ranboo Beloved, keytarist Tommy Raccoon, and bassist James Tomcat. Located in Ranboo's Mega Pizzaplex, the only location in the world (so far). Corvid adopts a showman personality while on stage, hes charismatic and such a heartthrob, very popular with the ladies. Off stage he's very calm and soft spoken, he's rather shy but still manages to be a flirt and a tease. Lightly poking fun at his bandmates, coworkers and even guests at times. He's definitely a fan favorite for a reason!

This was so fun to write and i cant wait to share more !!!! Stay tuned !!!!!!

#simpbur #studentbur #keith the dragon #dr malpractice #tinybur #animatronicfication au #sodas critters

61 notes · View notes

ya-zz · 5 months

Note

okay hear me out, playing video games with ramattra. completely sfw and fluffy (unless you wanna make it nsfw somehow, idm lol), just introducing him to video games - maybe like Mario or WiSports or Minecraft or something

btw i love you (platonically ofc) and my pugs say hi!

Aaaa this is hella cute!! Imagine him sitting down next to you and he's playing minecraft because it keeps him calm, omg omg, maybe a drabble will come off of that, but anyway! You're request as requested!

Ramattra x Reader (gen)

Word count: 1544

What Ramattra did in his spare time you never knew. Sure, he would read or work on something in the workshop, but what does the omnic do to wind down? Surely meditating was all he did? How does one meditate for so long without getting bored?

He’s an omnic. A war machine built to kill. An R-7000 who had never experienced joy. He has never experienced comfort… Warmth… Love. Ramattra has never felt… content.

His stress level were alarmingly high, and the humming of his worn out chassis rattled every time he moved. He was in need of repair and you were the only one capable of helping him. The only one capable of repairing him. His joints were getting stiff and while he hadn’t been in the world for that long, he had never taken care of himself. He never found a need. There was no other purpose for Ramattra to take care of himself and by the time he had met you, he was already too far gone.

He approached you one day, albeit against his own thought systems, and he asked for you to help him. He asked for you to repair him and that was exactly what you did.

Keeping him online, you listened to him talk about his past, what he remembered from back then, his pain and directives. You made sure to clean the crevices, fix the broken parts of him, repair what was damaged, rewire what wires had been frayed and became useless.

You had never felt closer with the omnic, and while you considered him a good friend, you were sure he saw you as just a other human. So when Ramattra admitted that he enjoyed spending his time with you, that he enjoyed your presence, a warm feeling flooded throughout your body.

It took nearly a day to get Ramattra fixed, but the moment he could stand, he sighs.

“Thank you.” He says, placing a hand on your shoulder. “Though… My joints are still stiff.”

“They will be. They’re new parts so they need to loosen up a little.” You smile gently at him as you begin to clean up.

“New?” He seems shocked by the fact that they are ‘new’.

You let out an airy laugh. “Well, technically yes, they’re new, but they’ve been sat in the box for years. It’s hard to come across your models replacement parts.”

“I was not made to be replaced.” Ramattra looks off to the distance.

“I know, so I did what I could to get some parts in just in case.” You place a hand onto his jawline, feeling the metal against your palm. It wasn’t cold, but it wasn’t hot either. It was warm.

Ramattra stares at you but as he goes to move his hand to replicate yours, wanting to touch your face, his fingers don’t open as easily as they did previously. You look down at his hand before an idea pops into your head.

“Come with me.” You don’t give him a choice as you practically drag him upstairs and into your personal home. “Take a seat, I’ll be back in just a moment.”

Ramattra stands in the living room for a moment before taking a seat, his knees uncomfortably high on the low sofa. He hears you moving and complaining from a different room. Something drops, a quiet expletive follows after. All the while, he’s looking around the living room. A tidy place, one that is kept clean. There isn’t much here, but he figures it’s because you are always busy.

A few minutes later you return holding a box in your arms.

“That looks heavy.” Ramattra looks between you and the box.

“I can assure you that I have carried heavier.” You smile, placing the box down on the floor before sitting next to it. “Let’s see…”

“What are you doing?” Ramattra stands and kneels beside you, watching you open the cardboard box. Inside of it was a bunch of wires, consoles and controllers. “What is all of this?”

“This…” You start, pulling out a series of cables and a console. “This is a Nintendo system, a Wii specifically.”

“A what?”

You laugh at his reaction. “A Wii. It’s a motion console. God, I haven’t set this up in years.”

Ramattra picks up the console and examines it. “How old is this?”

“I don’t know precisely, but they were released back in 2006.” You push the box aside after retrieving two controllers and the sensor.

“That was-”

“Yeah… This was my fathers.” You smile as you work on connecting it to the TV.

“How is this going to help me?” Ramattra cocks his head to the side.

“You have to move to play.” Looking back at him, you notice that he had picked up one of the remotes. “There are more advanced systems out there now, but this is a great starting point.”

Ramattra hums as he watches the TV light up.

“By moving, it will loosen those joints.” You smile at the omnic. “Come on, stand up.” Offering a hand to him, your smile grows a little more when he accepts it.

“What exactly are we playing?” His optics watch the screen as he watches the little cursor move across it. He looks back at your arm, watching it move in the direction of the cursor.

“Wii Sports. An all time fan favourite.” You laugh, looking at him hold his controller. You explain to him how to turn it on before your fingers are touching his wrist, putting on the safety strap. “This is so you don’t break anything.”

“Have you broken a TV before?” Ramattra asks, a warmth passing through his circuitry at your motions.

“Never, surprisingly. I’m not as much as a clutz as you think I am.”

Ramattra chuckles before turning his attention back to the screen.

“Just follow the instructions- oh my, I didn’t think the save data would still be here.” You smile as you look at your character.

“Is that supposed to be you?” The omnic asks.

“Yes.”

“It does not look like you.”

“It used to look like me. It has been many years since I pulled this out.” The character was childhood you. A small, derpy looking character you thought was cute.

Ramattra doesn’t seem convinced but he leaves it at that.

“What game mode do you want to play first?” You ask while looking up at him.

The omnic notices the mischieves glint in your eyes and scoffs. “Do not think you will beat me just because I have never played this.”

You laugh at his response. “Omnics learn quickly, I’m sure I can win a few games before you truly do beat my ass.”

Ramattra laughs alongside you before he grabs your arm, making you move the cursor over the games. He stops on baseball and hums in confirmation.

You nod before clicking the game, watching as Ramattra selects his temporary profile and his hand.

—

One game turned into two, then to three.

Then it turned into the whole evening. With each game, you won the first two, at a push three, but then after that, Ramattra started getting good. Too good. Of course, he let you win a few games in between, blaming it on his joints when in fact they were loosening up quickly from all the movement.

Ramattra, for once, was having fun. Hearing you laugh and joke as he spent time with you made him feel warm. His systems were calm, but there were times when you had accidentally brushed his arm and his systems flared up like he was blushing.

Hours of fun had gone by, neither of you getting bored of playing the same games on repeat, but it was getting late and now it was your turn to feel achy.

“Are you okay?” Ramattra asks, watching you slump back on the sofa behind.

“Yeah, just worn out.” You smile, leaning forward and taking the remote off of your wrist.

“It is late.” Ramattra states, fiddling around with his remote strap.

“Here.” You stand up and help him take it off. “How are your joints?”

It takes a moment for Ramattra to speak. The feeling of your hand on his nearly made him short circuit. “Loose. Thank you.”

“I’m glad.”

“Though my fingers still need some loosening.” He admits.

You stare at him for a moment, cheeks instantly burning up.

“What is it?” Ramattra notices your sudden flustered state.

“N-Nothing!”

“Oh?” The omnic takes a step forward towards you and towers over you. “I do still owe you for fixing me…” His hand touches your cheek, finger joins still stiff.

“I-”

“Perhaps there is a way we can both settle this.” His tone changes, low and sultry.

He backs you up against the wall, trapping you in with arms either side of you.

“Ram-” Your voice was barely a whisper, light and breathy. Ramattra chuckles at the reaction.

“What do you say?” He tilts his head, leaning down slightly as his optics are fixed with your eyes.

With burning cheeks, all you could do was stare back, mouth slightly open as if you couldn’t believe this was happening.

Ramattra tilts your head up, thumb resting on your bottom lip.

“Let me play with you.”

#overwatch #ramattra #ramattra x reader #overwatch 2 #ow2 #overwatch fanfiction #ramattra overwatch #fanfic #reader insert #yazzfics

79 notes · View notes

chrisrin · 1 year

Note

hi soljade fucks tell me abt them

YES!

OK, SO! The main idea with SolJade, in my head, is that it works in combination with The MultiShip Of All Time.

That being, this abomination:

Essentially, Sollux and Jade are moirails who both share two boyfriends (Dave and Karkat) and two girlfriends (Aradia and Feferi).

(meaning the individual pairings are: AraSolFef, AraJadeFef, DaveSolKat, DaveJadeKat, and JadeSol, as far as quadrants I imagine they're all over the place with, outside of JadeSol which is firmly pale)

This is the dynamic of all time to me and it exists purely for my pleasure, and SolJade can be enjoyed outside of this BUT I think important context is needed here for the following explanation:

Now, I know there's more to love than hobbies (or apparently, my maybe-aro ass doesn't know much better) BUT let's look at the hobbies that some of these pairings share. Specifically, hobbies of Sollux's, specifically, video games.

Sollux is, to me, a big mega-cringe Gamer. However, everyone in this pairing isn't necessarily also a big capital G Gamer to me (outside of one exception, oooh foreshadowing it's obvious who, we're literally talking about it).

Dave isn't a gamer, he plays games to break the shit out of them. He runs around on a Minecraft server griefing and building giant dick towers. His sole enjoyment with the one game we know he's played is to find glitches and fuck with it until it's broken.

Karkat isn't a gamer, Karkat will enjoy the occasional casual single-player game but he'd much rather put his time into books or movies.

Aradia and Feferi also aren't gamers, they're both more athletically-inclined people in my mind and engage in different activities/hobbies with both Jade and Sollux.

This leaves Jade, who grew up on a solitary island with only access to the internet for the large majority of her childhood. Jade, is a Gamer.

Sollux and Jade mostly connect over video games. Games that Sollux would've initially put off are things that he and Jade end up connecting over. Jade introduces him to Stardew Valley, and while he thought it was a "game for normies", 300 hours later and he's trying to perfectly optimize his keg house to get the maximum amount of cashback a day. Sollux introduces Jade to some online games and is delightfully surprised at watching her get toxic during a League of Legends game (they both have fun shitting on the other team). They play puzzle games together, both of them incredibly smart and working through mysteries together. Outer Wilds is a game they hugely connect over, and I think they'd have a blast playing something like Ace Attorney.

This is the main draw for me with the pairing. This connection that they'd have over this hobby they don't really share with anyone else. There's also an interesting emotional dynamic when tied together with the giant multiship. The two of them are moirails but also share partners, so they get to discuss all levels of their relationships comfortably with each other and the roles they play in them. It's fun, they're happy to hang out for hours quietly in Animal Crossing, or work on their collective Minecraft server (Sollux is the redstoner, Jade is the builder).

In conclusion: Huge nerds, huge gamers, huge diamonds. <>

#chris talks #homestuck #hs #soljade #jadesol #arafefsoljadedavekat #<- what an abomination #anyways feel free to ask me about them any time ever i always have so much to say

145 notes · View notes

logo-ssspathosss · 10 days

Text

💚💛❤️ Third Life Series in 2024 (happy 3 years of third life!!) 💚💛❤️

“This series went from being like ‘it’s hardcore with a gimmick!’ to ‘it’s like battle dome in here!’”

so because it has been 3 years since our beloved traffic series has started, i figured a good way to celebrate would be going back and watch 3rd life from the winners pov.

this post will basically contain notes from the 1st episode that my brain has entirely/somewhat forgotten.

if you have not watched 3rd life FULLY this is will contain spoilers! i feel like thats a given, but i'll put it here anyway.

(i was thinking about making this post just for funsies but then i checked the date and realized that it was actually 3rd life’s 3 year anniversary TODAY. fjdkjfkdjd I SO PLANNED THIS. TOTALLY!)

ONE MORE QUICK THING!!: did i forget anything? reply, or put it into the tags if theres something I missed!!

EPISODE ONE: Grian plays Minecraft… With a TWIST

. this is the first series Grian’s officially played using the proximity chat mod.

. mentioned briefly at 2:55, this is Grian’s first hardcore series he’s ever played in.

. the first person grian meets up with is BigB!

. Grian only sees RenDog once in his first episode.

. Grian was originally going to base somewhere in the flower forest (closer to where Scott and Jimmy eventually live) before basing with Scar in the desert. However, once he started building, Grian immediately disliked it, and called it the ugliest thing he’s ever built.

. Grian gives his flint and steel to Scar, which he uses to burn down Etho's dark oak tree.

. Grian hides two villagers, and originally wants to show them to Etho. However, Impulse, and Bdubs, follow, and the word gets out shortly after. *

. Scar and Grian were going to team up BEFORE Scar was killed. Scar first brings up having a monopoly on sand around the 12 minute mark.

. (not really notes but) Scar takes his shirt off for the first time at 15 minutes exactly. (i can’t believe im writing this smh)

. * Grian is invited to go back to the village after venturing to the sand biome with Scar, and trades his villagers. (he trades them for 3 diamonds, a dark oak sapling, a lava bucket, a juke box and disc, a bed, and some other lint)

. Grian explodes Scar at the 21:25 minute mark. There were 6 witnesses to his 'prank'. Impulse, Etho, Cleo, Bdubs, Tango, and Martyn. (my favorite thing about this is that Ren puts in the chat "Enchanting would have helped with that")

. Grian pledges his 1st life to Scar(didn't really forget that part, but i did forget that Grian loses his first life near the end of the series

. Pizza is first seen at the 25 minute mark exactly! (i think Pizza spawned in during a cut in Grian’s video. because i am only watching his pov, i do not know where Pizza originally cane from, this is the best estimate.)

. Grian abandons his first base in the flower forest at 26:15. This hole-in-the wall base didn’t last an episode.

. Grian and Scar originally wanted to have a monopoly over sand AND dark oak, and successfully chopped down the ‘only’ forest they saw. However, there was another not too far away from their base which ultimately ruined that monopoly. That being said, if the second dark oak forest had not been there, they might’ve had a chance at monopolizing dark oak saplings.

.💚💛❤️.

I will be doing more posts like this for all of the episodes of Grian’s pov. that being said, if i miss something that was said/a scene in a different pov, i will not include that in this post.

for now, i hope you’ve enjoyed this little forgotten-info post, and i encourage you to watch the series for yourself!

I remember watching 3rd life for the first time when the episodes were still coming out, and i’ve loved the series ever since. It was, and still is a comfort series i watch when going through tough times. I’ve met lots of people, and made lots of friends through this series, and although i don’t post a lot about it on my blog, i’m grateful to have found a community who feels the same.

thanks for reading!

.💚💛❤️.

#happy 3rd life anniversary!!#3rd life #third life #3rd life smp #third life smp #traffic series #grian

20 notes · View notes

ashleymasenado · 9 months

Text

QSMP Reader Insert One-Shot: It's a Deal

Summary: You were one of the residents of Quesadilla Island running for presidency; at least, you were. Halfway through, you had decided to drop out due to some other runners having similar campaigns to yours. But after listening to them better, something about them makes you uneasy, so you decide to get back into the run…with one of the few people you would ever trust.

Hi everybody! Alexa here! I'm feeling quite optimistic about this little bit I'm writing today, even though I've told myself quite a few times to wait for when I'm getting to the real fic, but that's not important right now. What's important is that I get this out before the final elections on the QSMP, because that's what this one-shot is all about. And man, if you guys have time to read this, might wanna grab a snack and a drink cause this is lengthy; probably one of the longest solo pieces I've tried writing.

Anyway, this is a female reader insert, as those are easier for me to write and because we don't have much girl power on the QSMP. But, if you are not a girl who is reading this, feel free to change things up for your own preference. I am a fifteen-year-old Christian teenage girl, but I know I have to respect and be thoughtful of others. This takes place after the third debate (Day 106). As for what you're up to, well—you'll just have to find out.

Major spoilers if you're not following the QSMP, or if you're still catching up on it. I'm sorry if anything is not entirely accurate to the timeline of the QSMP; I've checked the characters' pages on the QSMP wiki yet they're not entirely up-to-date on events. This is actually the first one-shot in a collection of two or three, because I had to get this out soon with the recent lore on the QSMP being absolutely crazy and getting darker and deeper, and the elections being close to wrapping up. I hope you don't mind what I did to get this out soon, everyone. I just hope I did a good job.

Will also be posted on quotev.com, fanfiction.net, and archiveofourown.org, on my account with the same name: Ashley Masenado, except for fanfiction.net with the username being AshleyMasenado15.

I hope you all enjoy, and remember—stay safe, and stay weird.

——————————————————————————————————

I can't believe I'm doing this…

You pursed your lips together as you walked through the woods, far away from the town, one hand in your pocket as the chatters grew quieter and farther away from you as you walked. You shuffled around your fingers, trying to stay calm, as you went over the crazy plan in your head again, over and over, to make sure you had it.

This plan was crazy. You were going crazy, and you absolutely hated it. For a while, you always thought you were the only sane one left on the island—until now. But this—this idea changed that thought. There was no turning back—but now you wished there still was.

Your steps came to a halt as you glanced around your surroundings, then raised your left hand to look at the screen of your Portable Minecraft Guide (PMG). You pulled up the map to check your location, and your icon confirmed that this was exactly where you needed to be. Pulling up the inventory tab, you rummaged through one of your backpacks for the three item kinds you would be needing: lava buckets, water buckets, and a flint and steel.

Your plan was simple: create a Nether portal with the bucket method to get Cucurucho's attention so you could negotiate with it. Normally you wouldn't break the rules on purpose; you had strong morality boundaries after all (unlike a majority of the people on the island). But you had no choice. You had missed the chance and had to come up with this in desperation, especially after what had happened near the end of the debate today. The chaos had prevented you from even getting a chance to see Cucurucho, so this was your best and only shot. You were not going to waste this only chance.

Letting out a deep sigh, you began to build the portal as the afternoon sky gave way to night. The cool breeze cooled the heat on your face, calming your heart from the nerves of today's events. As you poured one lava bucket down, followed by a bucket of water following your exact calculations, your thoughts drifted to the past events that you were around for since the beginning of Quackity's QSMP. Some were fun and fueled your resolve for adventure and to solve the mysteries of the island, while some were quite…depressing. Ordo Theoritas had been reestablished, the Nether portals at the end of the train tracks were a huge discovery, Quackity's mysterious disappearance (which you were still trying to solve today), many eggs had died (including your own, which nearly destroyed you and you were absent for a week, even needing therapy once), and the beginning of the elections of presidency for the island.

That was actually where you were now. Out of pure curiosity you had actually opted to run for president; and being the "do-it to-it" person you were, you went for it. After a bit of hard brainstorming and plenty of rewritten drafts, you had the perfect campaign: a program designed to protect the eggs and the people, and everyone and everything on the island. Cellbit, whose primary goal you knew was to leave the island—you knew he was going to be against the idea. But that didn't bother you, even if he was a good partner outside the elections.

As the elections had gone further with the first debate, you grew bold enough to share your further ambition to bring down the Federation, as they had done nothing to stop the problems of the Binary Code Entity and its attacks on the other eggs. It had been the cause of so many deaths, of people and eggs alike, and all they did was sit back and watch? Well you had had enough. If this so-called government wasn't going to do anything about your problems, you would. You would make sure of that.

At least until the very next debate. After you had heard the proposals of Bad and Baghera, you had decided to drop out of the elections as they had similar ideas to yours, and you figured since they were older than you and had more experience with these things. And besides, you figured with your lack of self-control that you'd probably go mad with power the moment you started your first day. It was probably for the better that you had dropped out. Thanks to some negotiations with Cucurucho and having the official paperwork signed, you were out of the run for presidency.

What some people didn't know, was that not long after the second debate, you were having second thoughts. There were many things you knew that the others did not, and these things worried you. Had you made a mistake to drop out of the elections? Maybe. Especially with Bad's proposal, which you had reflected on more after reading back on your draft for the QSMP newspaper (you were the main editor as it gave you something to do after you lost your egg). You didn't want something like that to happen again; you couldn't let it. You would not let it. If anyone was going to actually make things better on this cursed island, it was going to be you.

As the heaviness of the load in your hands began to lighten, you stopped pouring and put down the empty bucket. The portal was finished and now it only needed to be lit. You stared at the flint and steel in your hand, seething through your teeth at the thought of the crime that was about to be committed. Standing in position and gripping the tools tight, you flicked the flames and the deed was done. Now all you had to do was wait.

As you stood there waiting for Cucurucho to come by and give you your news, you thought of the strange nature of this white robotic bear. Ever since your first interaction with it, you had thought it to be an A.I., due to its use of a soundboard to communicate, having no desire for itself, and its constant presence to ask questions to the reidents as surveys. You were very wary of Cucurucho, especially after its first jumpscare on you. You nearly had a heart attack that day. No joke; you had to pump your fist on your chest plenty of times and your child had to calm you down since you were even laughing your head off with insanity.

As time went on and you were noticing patterns in its behavior, you began to understand it more—at least, you hoped it did. Cucurucho was only doing its duty, given to it by the Federation. It was only doing what it was told, even if it did have some… interesting methods to getting the job done. It reminded you of yourself in a way, with your "get-right-to-it-before-I-get-too-lazy" attitude. Except you weren't the kind to use force to get your work done, so of course there were some major differences. At least you didn't laugh in someone's face when they were about to lose the last of their hearts.

A flash of white caught your eye from the trees in the left, and you immediately stepped back as Cucurucho came running. In a single click it destroyed the portal, one block at a time. Not a single trace was left, not even a particle. As soon as the portal was out of existence, it turned around and faced you with that same eerie smile, plastered on its white mask for hours at a time. It sent a chill down your spine whenever you saw it; it was like a prison it couldn't escape. If you still didn't think Cucurucho was just some AIR (Artificial Intelligent Robot, as you called it), you would have felt a little sympathy for it.

"Hello," it said, its iconic leather-cover notebook in its left hand. The feather pen was stuck in-between the pages, serving as a bookmark for where it could write when it had to communicate with the residents beyond its limited soundboard. Its white long-sleeved shirt, white pants, white fingerless gloves, and white socks and shoes were spotless as always, somehow completely free of stain. The white mask sported the usual shiny black eyes and button pink nose, and the unmoving mouth where the soundboard played its repeated words held the same old smile. "You have committed an illegal act. Please, follow me."

"Yes, Cucurucho, I know I did, but I only did this to get your attention," you muttered, holding your hands up in defense as it tried to walk away. "I just wanna talk alright? It's really important, so please just listen."

To your surprise, the bear stopped in its tracks and turned around, returning back to you as it had walked away a few paces. It opened its book and wrote down some quick scribbles, then handed it to you to read.

I'm listening; what is it you need? The text read; inwardly you sighed with relief. You didn't think this plan would have actually worked, and yet it did. You figured it was now best to move on to the next phase, so you explained that you wanted to get back into the elections, and you needed Cucurucho's help for it. The bear was quiet the whole time, completely still as you talked. Halfway through, you realized the danger of the current situation and frowned slightly, looking around to see if anyone was listening in. Internally you sighed and rubbed the bridge of your nose, reprimanding yourself for not thinking this entirely through.

"We're not safe talking about this out here," you said, turning around to the direction of your house. The bear had put the book away, its paws now empty as it stood there; perhaps contemplating its decision in the matter. "Would you mind if we have to go to my house? I think we're close enough to it."

"No."

"Okay cool," you said, as you began to walk towards the direction of your home. You turned around to check if Cucurucho was following, and you kept going as it stayed three blocks behind you. As you went, you kept your map window open to make sure you were taking the most inconspicuous route, even making sure no one was following you by checking behind you every minute of the way. Normally you wouldn't call yourself paranoid, but things on the QSMP were making you more and more afraid of the island everyday.

Ever since the death of your egg child, you had been feeling less like your old self. You had become more tense, more wary of your surroundings and especially very careful with who you made friends with. You even stopped frequently hanging out with people, which you used to do plenty before to make more friends and be more socialised. Sometimes when some players would come by to ask how you were, they would be answered with an "I'm fine" and a chill wave. But in reality, sometimes you forgot how to smile a genuinely happy smile.

It took a bit of a long walk and a bit of quick sidestepping to avoid some of the player residents, but you and Cucurucho finally arrived at your little wooden cottage in the larger cherry blossom biome, near a quaint little village where you had built your house. It stood on top of a hill where the sun could shine into your windows. You opened the door to let Osito Bimbo in, then after you closed it you flicked on the lights with your redstone-powered lever that went all the way to some lanterns up on the ceiling.

Your living room was simple, yet enough to make one feel right at home. The red couch on the right side of the house was enough to seat atleast five people, and it was clean and inviting. On the right armrest was a jukebox with a chest labeled "Non-Copyrighted Relaxation Music" on its right side. A window with shutters was on the left wall, the shutters having been pulled up so the sunlight could flow in and warm the room enough; albeit with nighttime coming through, it was more of the sunset coming in. A ceiling fan whirred on in the middle of the ceiling, surrounded by the warm glows of the lanterns above. At the far side of the room were the stairs leading to the upstairs, with the bedrooms and the guest rooms. A hallway to the far left of the room lead to the dining room and the kitchen, where you lead Cucurucho into. You gestured for it to take a seat at one of the chairs at your table, while you went into the kitchen to prepare some refreshments for the both of you.

"Hey Cucurucho," you called from the kitchen while you poured pre-prepared hot water into two little teacups. "Jaiden told me you like tea a few days ago. You want some honey in your green tea?"

"Yes."

Nodding, you took out two of your green tea bags from the second top cabinet, dipping them into the cups and stirring a tablespoon of honey into one of them. You quickly stirred it and carefully made sure to evade the steam quickly lifting from the cup, as to not burn yourself from it. While the cups cooled on the counter, you took out a few home-baked Fita crackers from another one of your storage cabinets and put them on a plate, then put them aside to make room for the cups. After you brought and distributed them on the table, you took one of your discs from the shelf in the living room and played it in the jukebox near the table, then took a seat as you took your cup to sip your tea.

With the comfy music, you took some time to collect your thoughts while you looked around the dining room. The place was rather homey as intended, nice and simple with a long wooden table and wooden cushioned chairs. It took up most of the dining room, but left enough space for people to walk around the table, especially when you needed to serve visitors their refreshments. Lanterns hung from the ceiling from reinforced iron chains, bathing the room in a warm and comfortable glow.

You put down your cup and chewed on some biscuits, then after another sip you took a deep breath and braced yourself. Gently clapping your hands, you turned your attention back to the white bear, who seemed to have not budged from its seat except for having opened its book on the table and the cup in front of it being noticeably half-empty.

"So, Cucurucho," you started, holding out your hands in a hopefully professional manner. "Like I said, I wanted to talk to you about the elections. I would like to get back into the run for presidency."

"Why?"

You shuddered inside; this was new. You didn't think Cucurucho could have its soundboard updated to include new vocabulary, especially since you were used to hearing its usual "Good morning" , "No", "What are you doing?" and its eerie monotone "Hahaha". But maybe it was always there and you just didn't get an opportunity to hear it before.

"I want to get back into the presidency because I am concerned about the proposals of some of the candidates. Not only because of what they plan to do, but also because I am wondering if they will actually do it. Many running candidates often tend to forget about their promises because of their want for power. Once they have the power offered to them, they often forget about what they've promised and only care about themselves. Do you follow me?"

"Yes."

"Well, I'm not going to be like that. I've decided that if there's a fat chance that these candidates won't do what they've promised to do, then I'll do it myself, as I've always told myself all the while while I was in the run for presidency. Basically, I'd like to get back into the run for presidency because I want to help the island, and everyone in it, in my own way. What do you say?"

There was another reason you wanted to get back into the run for presidency, but it was one you would rather prefer to keep to yourself. Not only did it make you uncomfortable to think about, but it reminded you of terrible things that only further motivated you to get back into the run. You couldn't let something like that happen again, especially not with Bad and Foolish. They were some of your best friends on the island and the QSMP itself, and there was no way you would let history repeat itself over.

H̷͙͘ö̵̼́w̵̡̾ ̶̝͐c̵̦͝a̸̫̚n̵̞̊ ̷̥̏y̵̻̍ö̷̹́ū̴̠ ̷̭̿b̵̫̚e̶̱͌ ̷̖͠s̷͝ͅo̵̝̓ ̸͇̌c̷͚̚ǎ̵ͅl̴͍͗m̴̲̀ ̷̭̈́ȁ̵̼b̷̧̈́o̵̾ͅu̴̙̍t̶̲̀ ̴̣̋j̶̝̈́ú̸̹s̷̯̋t̵̙͐ ̷͙̊t̴̹̊ă̸͇k̷͚͊ī̶̧n̵͚͘ĝ̶̭ ̸͇̔s̵̤͠ỏ̸͓m̸̜̆e̵̱͊ō̶̫n̸͓̎é̶̩'̸̫͒s̶̔

"̸W̸h̴a̶t̴ ̸h̴a̸p̷p̶e̴n̵e̵d̸ ̷t̷o̴ ̷t̷h̶e̸ ̵B̴a̷d̴ ̵B̶o̶y̴ ̸H̸a̸l̵o̴ ̴I̴ ̵u̸s̵e̶d̴ ̷t̸o̷ ̶k̷n̵o̸w̴?̴!̷"̷

"̸I̴ ̶t̴r̷u̵s̸t̸e̶d̶ ̴y̶o̴u̶

Deciding not to dwell on the past, you looked up and noticed that Cucurucho's notebook was in front of you with the words written inside: "Please wait while I discuss this with my workmates." From across the room, Cucurucho had pulled up a window on its PMG, which you figured was where it was talking with its fellow workers of the Federation. You decided to be patient and think of what you could request to Cucurucho in case it would need you to do something to fulfill your requisition. You carefully closed the notebook with the pen inside as a bookmark and slid it back to the bear, chewing on the rest of the biscuits on the plate while leaving some for Cucurucho.

After only a few minutes, Cucurucho turned off the window and carefully took out a page from its notebook. Your eyes widened as you never thought Cucurucho was allowed to do such a thing. But you figured it was best to say nothing, so instead you opened the chat on your PMG and began to talk with your friend Foolish. The QSMP members were put into an all-members group chat where if a single person messaged, everyone would immediately be able to see it. Luckily, the QSMP admins had created something new for the players: a personal chat similar to the private messages in Minecraft, except without the /msg command which made things a little tedious. You were especially grateful for this new function, which you used plenty of times when you weren't busy building.

Hey Foolish, what's up? You put in the personal chat for Foolish Gamers, his profile picture of him in his shark hoodie and doing a silly face in his selfie. This always made you giggle and actually made you feel a little better when you were feeling down, especially since you all liked to joke about Foolish being a comic relief during all of these hard and angsty times.

Nothing much, just hanging out with Leo rn He typed, an adorable little peace sign emoji following after. An image of Leo with a poppy doing a little dance came on, which you immediately reacted with a little red heart for Leonarda exclusively.

She actually misses seeing you around He texted. Asking when you gonna be able to come see her again

Tell her I said I'm sorry that I can't like, come over cause of how busy I am with my house You replied, with a little sad face emoji with the little teardrop. I do miss seeing all the eggs, Leonarda especially

Cucurucho's usual "Good morning" made you look up from your PMG at the white bear, who gestured to two pieces of paper it slid across the table to you. Curiously, you tilted your head at it then looked down at the paper, and what you saw made your eyes widen.

A little ping made you look back onto the open window, with a message from Foolish saying You still there bud? with the little sad face with puppy eyes. You giggled for a second, then replied with Yeah, but I gotta go now though. On the next message you said Sorry bud Then a little wave emoji, brown for your skin color from your Asian heritage. Bye you texted, putting away the chat window without waiting for an answer. You glanced back at the paper on the table in front of you, your heart dropping once again as you picked it up with the utmost delicacy.

The papers were but pieces of a contract, written down with Cucurucho's iconic feather pen. Despite being written with a feather quill pen, it was very neatly in the Courier New font, as if it were written on a computer and printed. The Federation's logo was in the upper-left corner, as it always were in the bear's notebook (you noticed this logo a while after it would ask you to answer its surveys). You didn't know the Federation was now starting to print contracts for the residents, which was making you nervous, frightened even. Quietly you opted to ask Cucurucho when they had started writing these for the residents, albeit it only answered with an ominous "I don't know. Maybe". With a frown, you began to read through the paper's contents, remembering to read through the fine lines so as not to miss anything majorly important. The contract read as follows:

The rest of the paper read about an agreement to keep everything about tonight confidential: the meeting, the agreement, every single little detail. Not a word was to be uttered to anyone about what had occurred in this little cottage in the woods, on top of the hill above the village. You wondered how Cucurucho had been able to write this all down if it really wasn't an A.I. Perhaps it had had some help with its fellow members of the Federation, as it had been talking with them in a private chat window just a few minutes earlier.

Speaking of the Osito Bimbo—it was making you nervous; like, somewhat jittery in your seat as you tried not to let your heart pound so hard. It had been staring at you from its side of the table, never moving from its spot except for a few notably missing biscuits off the nearby plate. The cup was empty as well, which made you wonder if Cucurucho had been eating silently while you read as you had not heard a thing.

"So let me get this straight," you said, rubbing the side of your temple to get rid of a small headache and straighten your thoughts. "If I can fulfill the guidelines talked about in this contract, I can get back into the elections—back into the run for presidency right?"

"I don't know. Maybe."

"Mmhmm, right. So this is only effective until July 31 huh? That's plenty of time for such simple items, but I'm not asking for harder work."

Carefully you read the contract's fine lines over again at least three times before nodding and putting down the paper to face Cucurucho. Its black eyes stared back at you as if it were waiting for you to make a move first before it would, and you already knew what it was waiting for. To seal the deal and get you right to work.

You stood up, locking a firm gaze with the white bear as you held out your hand in agreement. This was it—the point of no return. "I've made my decision," you alluded. "I accept your offer, and I understand that there's no turning back from here. From here on out, it's a deal. I'll do my duties well and I'll make you proud."

Cucurucho stood up as well and took your hand in a rigid grip, the touch feeling cold despite the warm feel of the fingerless gloves. With a simple handshake and a quick signing, the deed was done, and the deal was sealed.

"I hope you enjoy the island."

"I will, thanks," you muttered as Cucurucho quietly left its seat, pushing back in the chair to the table. You figured it had other duties to attend to after this, so you knew it was time to bid goodbye for now—yet somehow you knew it would always be watching. Showing it the way out from the front door, you waved to it goodbye and good night as you tiredly stretched from the doorway. After it disappeared behind the trees below, you closed the door and went back to the dining room.

The papers still lay on the brown table, a stark contrast in the color scheme that was somehow pleasing to the eye. Your brows furrowed in worry as you picked it up, knowing there was no turning back now from this. You had to do it. For the island's sake, and your friends. Even if you had to explain a ton of things later down the line.

Deciding this needed to be secure, you sealed the document into a spare plastic bag and looked around for a good hiding spot. Your paranoia was making you worry about the thought that someone could come in here while you were gone and steal it out of pure curiosity, then your secret would be out and no one and nothing would be safe. It took you a while to find a secure location, but after that you figured you could rest easy. You pulled up the Settings window on your PMG, then logged off the QSMP for the day.

Back in the real world, you took off the VR helmet and shook the spare strands of hair out of your face. A quick stretch did you good, and then you opened your face cam to talk to your chat. You had been streaming on YouTube for atleast a few hours, and you needed some food and a quick nap; that sounded good enough. And the people in the chat definitely needed some of that too.

"Alright guys, I'd say this is a good time to end today's stream," you said to the camera, smiling for your viewers. You quickly read a few comments asking what was next for the lore, and you said there wasn't going to be too much major stuff except for what had just transpired, so they didn't have to expect much to happen except for stuff-gathering for the rest of the month if you could help it. Some joked that it was a bit like Jaiden's lore on the QSMP, and you couldn't help but agree that it was a bit similar in a way.

"Please note however that everything you have seen or will see in the QSMP is all heavily improvised roleplay, so please do not send any hate to the content creators for any action of theirs you find displeasing. Thank you, God bless, and have a great day."

From there, you ended your stream with your brief ending screen, then you stood up to prepare yourself for the rest of the day. Now out of role play mode, you couldn't wait to see what would await you in the QSMP the next day.

#qsmp #quackity smp #qsmp lore #qsmp cucurucho #cucurucho #qsmp osito bimbo #qsmp x reader #reader insert #q!cucurucho #q!chayanne #fanfic #oneshot #one shot #collection

86 notes · View notes

jellori · 2 months

Note

Hiya!

I was bored so i ran some Incorrect quotes with Dawn, Sparky and their friends'- (I gave them (Dawn) friends in my Au- Spark becomes friends with them later on) but I'm drawing some of the ideas, the ones i don't draw I'm putting them here for a bit of entertainment- I'm doing more of 'em just not in an ask-

Alrighty here we go-

Tw: ther is a lot of swearing because- why not

Found this funny lmao-

Dawn: ARE YOU- Sparky: Fucking. Dawn: KIDDING ME?! YOU- Sparky: Fucking. Dawn: IDIOT! Bee: …What was that? Sparky: Dogday banned Dawn from swearing, so I’m helping them out.

Sparky and Cat Bee having a... friendly argument-

Sparky: Blue M&Ms are the best. Bee: whAT IS THIS SLANDER? Sparky: What about it? They are. Bee: I WILL NOT ALLOW SUCH LIES ON MY CHRISTIAN MINECRAFT SERVER! Bee: THE RED ONES ARE THE BEST! Sparky: YEAH? WELL YOUR MOM'S A HO! Dawn: They're all chocolate inside, the colors don't mean anything. Candy: I like the yellow ones. Sparky and Bee: SHUT THE FUCK YOUR MOUTH!

They are helpful i promise

Candy: I currently have 7 empty notebooks and I have no idea what to put in them. Any suggestions? Sparky: Put spaghetti in it. Candy: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone but you. Dawn: Put spaghetti in it. Candy: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone but you two. Bee: Put spaghetti in it. Candy: I am no longer taking suggestions.

its just-.... they- it- yes.

Candy: If I punch myself and it hurts, am I weak or strong? Dawn: Strong. Bee: Weak. Sparky: An idiot, is what your are.

Giggle

Bee: Ducks are better than rabbits. Dawn: What? Rabbits are adorable. Have you ever been in a fight with a duck? Ducks are jerks. Candy: Duck is delicious! Rabbit is all gamey. Dawn: We’re not talking about flavour, Candy! Candy: Flavour counts! Dawn: Who carries around a duck’s foot for good luck? Anyone? Sparky: You wrap yourself in a comforter stuffed with rabbit hair. I’ll wrap myself in a comforter stuffed with duck feathers! Who’s cozier? Dawn: Okay, but- Sparky: NO, NO, NO, NO. WHO’S COZIER? Candy: Then why don’t we take a rabbit, a duck, stick ‘em in a cardboard box and let them fight it out! Dawn: BECAUSE IT’S ILLEGAL, CANDY! Candy: ONLY IF WE BET ON IT, DAWN! Bee: I- Jesus-

Last one lmao-

Bee: What's the most efficient way to burn calories? Candy: Exercise more! Sparky: Set yourself on fire. Dawn: There are two kinds of people.

Hope you enjoyed these, i just wanted to share em with you now byebye! hope your doing well :}

These are so fun oh 😭😭

I love incorrect quotes so much- i uses to follow so many tumblr Blogs back in the day for these!

Dawn rlly is a silly lil bean abd sparky is so aggro pfft

#ask #dawn #poppy playtime #btw i saw ur fic!#didnt read it yet sorry #art drama and work shifts got me tired but I will get to it :^)

31 notes · View notes

mawofthemagnetar · 2 years

Text

THE OFFICIAL HERMITCRAFT SPOOKINESS SURVEY RESULTS ARE IN!

And I’ve made a lovely powerpoint to share with you all!

I’d offer a link to an actual slideshow but I tried importing it to google slides and it all went to hell in a handcart.

ID’s courtesy of the lovely folks over at @mcyt-transcribed , are under the cut!

Thanks so much to everyone who participated!

Enjoy!

[ID: A 14 page slideshow titled, "Who is the spookiest Hermit?" formatted to follow the questions from an earlier quiz, "Who is the spookiest Hermit?" "Who is the least spooky Hermit?" "Which Hermit would be a horror movie monster?" and "Which Hermit would be the first to die in a horror movie?" Each category has a slide with the top three voted hermits, a bar graph, and a responses slide. /end ID]

Longer ID under the cut! And by long, I mean REALLY long!

[ID:

Photo 1: In a spooky font centered on a dark gray background reads, “Hermitcraft Spookiness Survey! Results and witty rejoinders courtesy of you, yes you!” Underneath the title reads, “A survey by MawOfTheMagnetar with image descriptions proved by @mcyt-transcribed!” There are minecraft skins from HermitCraft’s season 7 halloween celebration in each corner, Keralis in his green ghoul head in the bottom left, Zedaph’s black and white ZedDeath. In top left, a red tinted [head] In top right, and a black tinted [head] In bottom right

Photo 2: Titled: “Who is the Spookiest Hermit?” in the same spooky font.

On the left in a text box and normal font reads, “Doc and Cleo were closely tied through most of the survey, Doc only managing to pull through at the last minute to be crowned the spookiest of all the hermits!”

On the right is a text box which reads “Joe, who spent most of the survey at the back of the pack, surged ahead in a surprise upset and stole a richly-deserved bronze!”

On the smallest podium is Joe Hills, followed by ZombieCleo in 2nd, and DocM77, edited to wear a crown, on the middle and highest podium in 1st place.

Photo 3: A bar graph titled, "Who is the Spookiest Hermit?"

The bars are red and read, “Doc = 143, ZombieCleo = 139, Joe Hills = 72, Etho = 66, Cubfan = 48, xBCrafted = 36, Keralis = 35, PearlescentMoon = 27, BdoubleO = 22, Grian = 19, Hypno = 17, Scar = 14, Tango = 14, Xisuma = 13, FalseSymmetry = 12, Zedaph = 12, VintageBeef = 11, StressMonster = 10, TinFoilChef = 10, Welsknight = 10, GeminiTay = 8, iJevin = 7, Mumbo = 3, Rendog = 3, ImpulseSV = 1, Iskall85 = 1."

Photo 4: Titled, "Selected Responses:" There are screenshots of selected text in white boxes scattered around the image.

Tango’s Minecraft face hangs from the top of the photo upside down above the text, "I can imagine Tango crawling all over my ceilings and walls in the night."

"You are nothing to Cub. I am nothing to Cub. Cub sees his goals and sees what stands between them and him and there is soon to be an empty path in his wake. (Honorable mention: Joe because he could probably pull off the next creepypasta ARG to sweep the web if he really wanted to and I am telling you right now that the seams would be nonexistent. I've seen him get soda in his beard and talk for at least ten minutes straight about rhinestones though so)"

Zedaph peeks out from the left of the photo to the left of, "zedaph is not spooky he just feels like he Would do a horrifying experiment on you"

"We all know it's Cleo. The rest of them are undeniably pathetic (endearing) but Cleo can and will kill you"

Gem peeks out from below, "Gem gets a ranking here because she's SO unassuming, but she will murder."

"Pearl seems fine at first, and then she's not."

"If you breathe on cleo wrong she would murder and she'd be right for it"

xB peeks out from the right of the photo between the next two messages. "xB is just really elusive to me lol, ive watched stuff of his but he's just like so weirdly spooky to me regardless of what he does."

"xB is mostly unsettling. like, have you seen the guy? i think it was in one of solarflare's stories where they described xB's smile as the kind of smile you expect to come with sharp teeth or red eyes or smth but it just Isn't There. and that feels Wrong. my guy feels Wrong because he's too notmal when you expect him to be more abnormal."

"If I saw doc as the fanartist depict him literally anywhere at night I would be shaking in my boots. That's the terminator. I'm out."

"have you seen joe hills."

"Keralis walks like he's going to murder you."

Keralis is below, "keralis isnt the scariest hermit, but he does have the most threatening vibes. i might take more damage by angering doc or existing in cub's vicinity when he's in a silly goofy mood, but keralis i think has the most 'theres something lurking behind those eyes' vibes, and i dont know why. i can see why he was assigned eldritch by the fandom"

"doc would be the best at ruining your life so while he isn't a scary guy he could be! he just isn't! keralis scares me.”

Photo 5: Another slide formatted with a three tiered podium titled: "Who Is The Least Spooky Hermit?"

On the left of the slide, "Mumbo was the runaway favourite to win this category right from the start, and sweeps the Wet Tissue award without breaking a sweat!"

On the right side of the slide, "Gem, in an upset so surprising an amendment had to be frantically made, apparently took third place! Congrats to her! She’s a soggy cat too, folks! “

Gem is on the 3rd place podium, Bdubs in 2nd place, and MumboJumbo, edited to wear a crown, in 1st .

Photo 6: Another bar graph titled "Who is the Least Spooky Hermit?”

"MumboJumbo = 114, BdoubleO = 94, GeminiTay = 75, Xisuma = 72, GoodTimesWithScar = 69, Zedaph = 39, StressMonster = 33, Rendog = 32, ImpulseSV = 28, Iskal185 = 25, Etho = 22, Keralis = 19, Joe Hills = 17, Grian = 16, TangoTek = 16, VintageBeef = 16, TinfoilChef = 12, Doc = 8, FalseSymmetry = 7, PearlescentMoon = 7, Welsknight = 7, iJevin = 4, ZombieCleo = 2, Hypno = 1, Cubfan = 0, xBCrafted = 0."

Photo 7: Titled, "Selected Responses:" There are screenshots of selected text in white boxes scattered around the image.

"bdubs my little scromblo skrunkle skrinkly diddly doo"

Mumbo is between the next two messages. "This man is a wet cat in human form, he is a webkin that has been soaked in milk and thrown at the nearest wall, he is the saddest most pathetic sounding squeak toy to ever be squeezed" and "mumbo jumbo the slowly boiled frog of hermitcraft"

"Mumbo is just a human chocolate éclair tbh"

"Tango looks like my dad and I believe I can take my dad in a fight so its fine"

Scar is in the bottom left corner to the left of "Yes I put Scar as most and least spooky. He has the range"

Wels is to the right of "Wels could walk into my room covered in blood and I'd laugh at him. His boots go 'cling clong'."

"the only thing that scares me about doc is the potential of him saying some dumb shit on twitter and me having to see it all over my tumblr dash for some reason. how is he supposed to scare me he doesn't even know how to roleplay without godmodding <3"

Below the previous text is a screenshot of a tweet that reads: "Docm77 @/docm77 'Day 1 at the nude spa. I won.' 3:02 PM - Sep 17, 2020."

"Wet paper towel man. Pathetic wet cat that's been left out in the rain. Man fucking confused himself with a piston. Ppl keep making xisuma the 'scary admin' but i think hed be startled by his own reflection."

"Xisuma is bitchless and literally has the vibes of a fucking cotton ball but by god is he a dude lol"

Grian's head overlaps on the word "threatening" in "Sorry Grian you're a Problem but you're not threatening"

Photo 8: A bar graph titled, "Which Hermit would be a horror movie monster?"

On the left of the slide, "Doc clinches the crown again, with Cleo right behind nipping at his heels! A richly-deserved silver for Cleo and another easy W for Doc."

On the right of the slide, "Another surprise upset came in the form of Bdubs nudging out established spook machines like Ren and Grian to clinch the bronze for himself! Soggy and Scary simultaneously- Bdubs can do it all, folks!"

Bdubs is in 3rd place, ZombieCleo in 2nd, and DocM77, edited to be wearing a crown, in 1st.

Photo 9: A bar graph titled, "Which Hermit would you most expect to be the monster in a horror movie?"

"Doc = 120, ZombieCleo = 105, BdoubleO = 53, Grian = 43, Rendog = 38, Keralis = 35, Etho = 29, Joe Hills = 25, PearlescentMoon = 22, Cubfan = 21, xBCrafted = 20, TangoTek = 18, Scar = 17, Zedaph = 13, MumboJumbo = 12, Xisuma = 12, GeminiTay = 10, iJevin = 10, VintageBeef = 8, Falsesymmetry = 6, ImpulseSV = 5, StressMonster = 5, Hypno = 4, Iskall85 = 3, Welsknight = 3, TinFoilChef = 2."

Photo 10: Titled, "Selected Responses:" There are screenshots of selected text in white boxes scattered around the image. Up in the top is a message from the creator, “Shoutout to the multiple novels I got in the responses for this one!"

"gem's like the overly friendly homeowner who turns out to be a serial killer in the third act. i dont actually think keralis is all that scary, but i do think he has too many joints and his eves are a little bit too wide."

Scar is to the left of, "scar is a monster but in a "you forgot to read the fine print. my friend" kinda way"

"zedaph is not the monster. he's the man behind the monster the victor frankenstein, except he doesn't regret his crimes against god and science. now, i could've chosen cub, but cub's a force of chaos who does science, whereas zed's a scientist who does chaos. and yes, chaos is a good motivator, but it doesn't necessarily lend itself to long term villainy. (honorable mention to tango, who is more of a fantasy/rpg villain than a horror villain.)"

Cub is below, "Imagine horror movie monster. Evil Ghost. Evil Scientist. Evil Vampire. Not inherently evil but perceived to be as such Man- eating alien. CEO of oil company. They couldn't all be played by the same guy, right? Wrong. Welcome to my perfect reality where Cub gets to be every evil guy and is rewarded handsomely for it"

"ren. were woof"

"have you seen joe hills."

"All feral"

Grian is above, "i feel like grian'd be the ominous figure staring at you from the end of a darkened corridor"

"gem is the final girl. nothing else to be said she has killed and will kill again! (good for her!!!!)"

Impulse is below, "impulse may be a canon demon. but hes simply to kind to be evil. also let him rip people apart"

"ehk. also the sight of keralis in a dark hallway staring directly at me would kill me instantly" Keralis' eyes are framed by the previous and next message, making them pop and hiding his mouth

"keralis and scar would be in a fucked up horror movie with the uncanny valley thing going on, like a parasite / alien imposter movie"

Photo 11:

Another slide formatted with a three tiered podium titled: "Which Hermit would be the first to die in a horror movie?”

On the left of the slide, " To the surprise of absolutely nobody on planet Earth, Scar sweeps this category without an issue. He’s here to have a good time and he’s having it in Leatherface’s front garden. "

On the right side of the slide, "In even less surprising news, the gold and silver winners in the Wet Paper Bag event also podium for this one! I’m as shocked as you are."

Mumbo is on the 3rd place podium, Bdubs in 2nd place, and Scar, edited to wear a crown, in 1st.

Photo 12:

A bar graph titled, "Which Hermit would be the first to die in a horror movie?"

“GoodtimeswithScar = 134, BdoubleO = 107, MumboJumbo= 81, Xisuma = 48, TangoTek = 31, Zedaph = 27, Grian = 22, Keralis = 22, Rendog = 18, Joe Hills = 17, ImpulseSV = 10, Iskall85 = 9, Etho = 7, Stressmonster = 7, iJevin = 6, Cubfan = 5, Falsesymmetry = 5, GeminiTay = 5, VintageBeef = 5, Welsknight = 4, ZombieCleo = 4, Doc = 3, PearlescentMoon = 2, xBCrafted = 2, Hypno = 1, TinfoilChef = 0.”

Photo 13:

Titled, "Selected Responses!" There are screenshots of selected text in white boxes scattered around the image. In the background is a faint image of Scar.

“Have you seen Scar”

“Listen, I know the obvious answer is Mumbo. HOWEVER, for peak wet cat-ness, I think he needs to survive a few murders and get properly traumatized. Going off classic horror movie tropes, the first victims are usually the popular kids, and Jevin has big jock energy.” Jevin is hanging from the top of the image.

“Scar….scar. *sigh* Scar.”

“Keralis’ maidenly behaviour puts him in the danger zone. The bimbo teen girl always dies first.”

“Sorry impulse. they say virgins always die first.”

“impulse: white man from the desert. there's no way he doesn't go into the forest/room that he hears strange noises from”

Impulse in his normal skin is looking from the side of these messages.

“They would all die first.”

“Its Scar. Need I say more”

“welsknight for sure is gonna go out looking for the monster/bad guy to "protect" the others and ends up getting killed first”

“ I think Scar will die first in such a comical way that the horror movie genre shifts into horror-comedy for Scar’s death”

“Scar always dies first.”

“sorry Ren, but I haven’t checked doesthedogdie.com yet and I had to make some guesses” Ren is poking out of the side next to this message.

“I know Solidaritygaming isn't here but it would be him. they'd invite him to the haunted forest and he'd die a terrible death” Solidaritygaming is emerging from the corner with several white question marks over his head.

“bdubs would immediately start screaming if left in an unlocked fully furnished upkept basement with the lights off”

“Scar”

“Bdubs would survive everything cause he would go to sleep and wake up after the horrors were over.”

“zedaph voice: "oh hey what does this monster do? fascinating!" (immediately dies)”

Photo 14:

White text on a black background. The text reads “That’s all folks! Thanks so much to everyone who participated! It was a blast!”

/End ID.]

#hermitcraft survey #hermitblr surveys #survey #long post #hermitcraft #hermitcraft spookiness survey

226 notes · View notes