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lottiestudying · 7 months

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11.10.2023—unproductive day but we need balance ✨🌾🌿🌸

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girl-please-study · 7 months

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11/25 Days of Productivity

It was a really clear day today which automatically helped with the ambience! taking a nap after doing the housework does wonders actually. I wasn't tired for the first time in a long time <3

Study Time : 5.5 hours

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ofyoungbamboo · 8 months

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@heygutlcss has been found worthy

Nayotake no Kaguya-Hime sat dutifully behind the silk panels of the kichō as she listened to the translator list the solutions this foreigner had discovered to the riddles she had put to her suitors. A dark eye looked carefully through the panels at this foreigner. He wasn't sophisticated but looked like someone who'd spent a lifetime doing hard work.

She breathed deeply and stood up, hesitating a moment before she she parted the silk panels so this stranger could look upon her himself. <<Ask him if he wishes to stay the night,>> She said expecting this foreigner to understand the implications. That was why he had come wasn't it?

#heygutlcss #heygutlcss {riff}#nayotake no kaguya hime {ic}#v; shining princess of the young bamboo

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whatsbehindthefacade · 1 year

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@heygutlcss asked: ❛ you’re not as bad as everyone says you are. ❜ ( Maria, for Riff)

"Plenty would argue with that."

Actually, he's pretty sure just about his entire life history would probably argue with that, though he's given up caring a long time ago what people think. Mostly anyway, there are certain people whose opinions matter to him. But hey, if most of the world wants to see him as nothing more than a hoodlum...let them. Not like there's much he can do these days to change their minds anyway, even more so after everything that's happened.

Still, it's true that even just a few weeks ago he never would have envisioned spending any sort of extended period of time in the presence of a Sharks girl, but apparently the world has seen fit to test him once again. That and at this point, he's not actually sure he could get rid of Maria if he tried, she's been incredibly stubborn, despite his less than stellar behaviour.

That being said, she has helped him sneak a cigarette behind the nurses' backs, huddled on the fire escape and letting the familiar smoke fill his lungs. It's a blessing to his nerves, which quite frankly have been on edge from the moment he woke up in this damned hospital feeling like he'd been split in half.

"But with that statement you're either being overly generous or way too naive," he snorts, taking another drag of the cigarette.

#answered #heygutlcss #c: riff #v: to your last dying day

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cannotfly · 2 months

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@heygutlcss's raefer mcclellan sent: ❝ stay the night. ❞

he makes her laugh. despite herself, it's fun to imagine a reality where she's able to just ask if she can stay over at a boyfriend's house, even if her supposed loving parents would even let her. she could even bring riff home. introduce them to her mother and father before he took her out. the way things should be done. not that johanna doesn't like what they have now---they have each other and that's all that really matters---but there would be a lot less stress on their plates if they weren't trying to hide from a judge with too many eyes.

the driver of the car has yet to return, but she's already pulling everything back on. just in case. in an out-of-character action, johanna pauses midway through buttoning up the front of her blouse just to smile at him. she's always happy afterward ( usually ) and prone to giggling. how could she not be when riff is her favorite person on earth and they've chosen each other? ( not to mention, he looks terribly handsome . . . especially, right now, )

❝ i can't. ❞ she's still grinning as she shakes her head. the invitation is enough to make her light-headed. she would love to be able to lay down next to him all night, even if she doesn't sleep well. ❝ just because he's out of town doesn't mean, i won't go unnoticed. mrs. eastman is staying the night in the guest room and mr. bamford is checking in early in the morning. that's the agreement whenever he's out of town or i have to go with him, but he doesn't want me missing any school so--- ❞ ( she's also prone to rambling after. ) johanna shrugs. ❝ i want to, riff, i do. ❞ a hand falls from her buttons and her fingers intertwine with his. ❝ let's go somewhere before i have to go? i have another hour? ❞

#*❈ ‣ have you decided it’s safer in cages‚ singing when you’re told? — ( interaction. )#*❈ ‣ she's been living in her white bread world as long as anyone with hot blood can — ( v: hawkins. )#heygutlcss #suggestive tw

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cagesings · 1 year

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@heygutlcss / riff sent: 😳 - caresses my muse’s body

the first time she came, she was as scared as a mouse taught in a trap. the mouse only wanted a bite of the sweetness left out and that was exactly what johanna was hungry for. some kindness. anything. anthony was dead and she was married to a man she had assumed didn’t like her for the entirety of her first marriage. she couldn’t sleep in the same bed where anthony whispered his final words to her.

now, it’s impossible to imagine a night where she doesn’t come. it doesn’t matter if they’ve argued earlier or one of them snapped at the other for something ( johanna tries her hardest to keep all of it away from laura and the bed ), she comes every night, unless he asked her not to. though, she believes he might need that just as much as she does.

with his arms around her body, she burrows her face into his chest. if johanna opens her mouth, she would surely hear them chattering. perhaps, it’s her fault for not wearing as many layers as she should. she’d made sure laura was warm before coming here. but she’d neglected herself.

❝ i’m cold, ❞ she whispers in riff’s ear. a hand lifts, gently touching his cheek. ❝ does my hand feel cold, too? i think it does. ❞

#*❈ ‣ 𝘩𝑜𝑤 𝑖𝑠 𝑖𝑡 𝑡𝘩𝑎𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑠𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑛𝑦𝑡𝘩𝑖𝑛𝑔? — ( interaction. )#*❈ ‣ 𝑖𝑓 𝑤𝑒 𝑙𝑎𝑦 𝑎 𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑜𝑛𝑔 𝑒𝑛𝑜𝑢𝑔𝘩 𝑓𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑤𝑒'𝑙𝑙 𝑝𝑎𝑠𝑠 𝑖𝑡 𝑜𝑛 𝑡𝑜 𝑦𝑜𝑢 — ( v. single mother )#heygutlcss #*❈ ‣ 𝑜𝑢𝑡𝑠𝑖𝑑𝑒 𝑡𝘩𝑒 𝑠𝑘𝑦 𝑤𝑎𝑖𝑡𝑠 𝑏𝑒𝑐𝑘𝑜𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔 — ( queue. )

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warriours · 8 months

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@heygutlcss

Ajax stood in the doorway of he kitchen, a once sulky and jittery. He was used to sitting outside in the hall he kept looking over his shoulder towards Thomas. He felt exposed with him here in Cleon and Maria's apartment. "How much longer is it going to to take?" He asked wondering if Maria saw him and Thomas any different knowing what they were.

As women went, Ajax liked Maria a lot and their talks too.

#heygutlcss #heygutlcss [maria]#you got a one track mind [ajax]

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ircnwrought · 10 months

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WHO DID THIS TO YOU

@heygutlcss (riff) to maria !!

__________♥ SHE ENTERS THEIR HOME LATER THAN NORMAL. with the light in the window, she knows he's held up for her, which brings tears stinging her eyes from something other than the bruise on her jaw or split lip. ❛ no sé. he said he wanted my money ... ❜ it's no secret what day the department store pays its employees. he must have waited, picked on her because she's the smallest of the bunch. her hand is shaking as she lifts it to show her split knuckles. ❛ i hit him just like you showed me ... i think i broke his nose. he didn't get the money. ❜

#c; maria nunez #❛ time in a bottle ❜ ▬ ( answered. )#heygutlcss #reply: riff mcclellan (heygutlcss)#❛ american dream ❜ ▬ ( maria nunez meme. )#(( PRO TIP TO THE PEOPLE OF CHICAGO #it's probably a GOOD IDEA NOT TO MESS with the wife of a former gang leader ))

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tommywllliams · 1 year

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@heygutlcss said, you need to eat better.

so grazi's NOT impressed with the humble meal tommy fixed for himself last night. granted, he isn't hiding the evidence well; he fell asleep before he could clean his dish. tried to make a poor man's dinner, but tommy's meager kitchen lacks half the ingredients necessary. frankly, he finds humor in that — imagine being too poor for a goddamn poor man's meal.

"i got you, don't i?" cue the sly, charming grin as tommy wraps his arms around the blonde's waist. he pulls graziella onto his lap, lets her have a front-row seat to his open-floored & extremely humble abode.

"one dinner of hot dogs and potatoes ain't gonna kill me. promise."

#ANSWERED.#DYN: GRAZIELLA LAROCCA.#V: GENERAL.#heygutlcss

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gathersroses · 10 months

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@heygutlcss cont.

despite trying to be serious, she can only go so long without cracking some kind of joke. the fact that she's sober through all this doesn't help either. any form of alcohol is the last thing she can afford right now. that doctor's appointment already scabbed her dry and that was only the beginning. grazie shrugs. ❝ maybe, but i’ve succeeded in getting it, didn’t i? i’m a lunatic, but a rewarded one. ❞

that gets a small laugh from her. ❝ you get slapped with a metal stick if you asked questions? if i was in that class and you asked what was in those paper bags, i would’a hit you before sister joanne morton had the chance. poor girls. ❞ tucking her hands into her pockets, grazie lets out a low whistle. ❝ wouldn’t’ve minded some jerk guy getting hit for being a prick and asking anyway. ’ she can think of a few former classmates she wouldn’t have minded having a stick knocked against their knuckles. ❝ yeah? why not? i wanna know what was in those bags. tampons or pads? or did your catholic school have that whole thing about tampons taking your virginity or whatever? ❞

grazie gives him hell every time he shows up with a new bruise or scar. this jet business has been getting more and more tiring as time goes on. when she was younger, it made her feel like it was protecting her from something. now, it's just stupid. ❝ everyone needs band aids, riff. you never know when your girlfriend’ll go up to you and tell you that you knocked her up and you burn your hand on the stove. ❞

there's already a cat in mind. the little tabby she found in the dumpster and she secretly nursed back to health for as long as he needed her. that cat was a lot easier than taking care of a human baby. when that tabby didn't need her anymore, grazie could open up the door and let him wander around as much as he wanted to. can't just do that with her own kid, despite what her mother did to her and her brother. ❝ nah. that's a stupid name. ❞ she wouldn't name that poor cat after the enemy creature. it would be as if they named this kid shark or emerald.

❝ i don't know what i'm gonna do. told you that. i just - ❞ she runs a hand through her hair ❝ - it seems wrong to just give them up like that. ❞ her parents didn't want her. who is graziella to continue the bianchi line like that? parents giving birth to kids they don't want and giving up on them. ❝ it's you and me? we're figuring this out together, right? ❞

#feel free to ignore this because i literally took three thousand years and i transferred it over to here because i was halfway done sjgkdj #look even johanna got him to talk and johanna is a prude victorian of course grazie was gonna be like this #i feel like they're not getting much done other than talk about period products cats and band aids. nice.#interaction: g. bianchi #heygutlcss #pregnancy tw #menstruation tw #periods tw

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lottiestudying · 7 months

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30.10.2023—public holiday monday slay

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girl-please-study · 6 months

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started ochem and overall it has been a really humbling experience.

🎧: Adharam Madhuram

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grazziella · 1 year

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@heygutlcss / riff sent: [ UP ]: sender briefly lifts the receiver up in the air while spinning during a dance together.

she used to shriek when he did that. it was something unexpected -- mostly because she knew how his back was and knew it must’ve hurt him. but now, graziella just smirks down at him, lifting both legs while in the air. once or twice, she’d lost her shoe while dancing, but that was fine with her as long as she got them back by the end of the night ( those shoes are one of the last parts of her brother she has left ). it’s kind of like flying, she thinks. kind of like pretending she doesn’t like in the slums of manhattan. ❝ you’re gonna make me feel like ginger rogers doing like that, ❞ grazie says once she’s back on the ground. her smile still hasn’t melted away. ❝ maybe we should hitchhike out to hollywood, yeah? get a role in a movie? bet we could - ❞ she smirks ❝ - we’re pretty good dancers. what’s fred and ginger to us, huh? ❞

#riff: twirls her #grazie: so we should run away and become famous huh #❈ — she opens her mouth but nothing comes out / * in character.#❈ — peeping in toy store windows like we could afford it / * v. pre #heygutlcss #❈ — you swore to me we was gonna dance first / * queue.

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whatsbehindthefacade · 11 months

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@heygutlcss asked: i know you think i'll leave, but i won't. not now. not ever. (Maria)

"Everyone leaves, shortstop." Riff takes a drag of the cigarette in his hand, peering out the window where he's propped himself up on the sill. His eyes are on the horizon, but they're not really taking it in at the same time, lost in his own thoughts. "S'just the way of things. Sooner or later, everybody leaves. Even the ones who say they won't."

It's all he's ever known, after all. People leaving. His father had been gone by the time he'd turned seven, dragged off to jail or god knows what. His ma had gone before he'd turned ten. He doesn't know where his uncle is these days, nor does he want to know anything about that bastard. Tony's gone, been gone twice, first off to jail, and then off to that permanent sleep. The Jets are...well, he sees some of the boys around, but the Jets are done. They're all scrambling to figure out their lives. Sometimes he wonders if there's much point. Sometimes he wonders why the hell he's still here when Tony isn't. That doesn't seem right. It should be the other way around.

#answered #heygutlcss #c: riff #v: to your last dying day

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cannotfly · 3 months

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@heygutlcss's raefer mcclellan sent: ❝ i like you here like this. ...in my bed. ❞

when he joined her in bed these past few weeks, it hasn't been the same. ( and johanna realizes how joined her in bed sounds even when it was just to fall asleep next to each other. truly. ) ever since the beach, she kept waiting for him. waiting for a sign that would hopefully be as clear as the light in the lighthouse since she could be awfully blind with such matters. waiting for the word. waiting for something as simple as a touch. and it never came. she knew he wanted this just as much as she did. as she washed away all the salt and the sand from that night on the beach, johanna couldn't help the giddy smile and excited butterflies in her stomach. they wanted each other . . . when was he going to finally --- ?

she liked the beach. she liked the sound of the waves in the background. she liked the smell of the salt and the way he touched her. they clung to each other and she smiled at his questions and tried not to mind when her cheeks turned pink when she asked hers.

gaze is fixated on the little mark left on her thigh. her thumb runs over it now. johanna had been caught in the moment. she hadn't thought about propriety and the reason behind . . . she'd enjoyed herself. she was happy.

❝ i'm usually in your bed. ❞ she doesn't move to look at him. there's the pink mark on her thigh. it's almost as if she's surprised it doesn't disappear when she traces a finger across it. last night had been real. after her wedding night with anthony, all of that happened. johanna hadn't meant to scare him. she hadn't meant for riff to find out about any of it. is she going to cry like last time? her other hand rises to wipe at her eyes before any tears could fall. she can't ruin this.

teeth sink into her lower lip. johanna knows what he means, of course, there isn't anything like being in his bed after last night ( which, technically, happened just this morning. ) ❝ are you . . . alright with it? are you alright? i didn't hurt you, did i? if i hurt you, we don't have to do anything like that ever again. i'm sorry. i should have . . . been better. should i leave? ❞ finally, she looks up at him, searching for the anger or pain in his eyes. she's ruined it already, hasn't she? ❝ sorry. ❞

#hopefully left this vague enough for us to plot around #and if we come up with something entirely different for the actual wedding night that's perfectly alright!#for now she hasn't fully begun to freak out but you know her #she'll start panicking soon enough #*❈ ‣ have you decided it’s safer in cages‚ singing when you’re told? — ( interaction. )#*❈ ‣ if we lay a strong enough foundation‚ we’ll pass it on to you. we’ll give the world to you. — ( v: single mother. )#heygutlcss #suggestive tw

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cagesings · 9 months

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@heygutlcss / riff sent: “ i love you. i’m sorry. ”

she doesn't want to talk to him. it seems whenever they fight, everyone else on the farm picks up on it. people noticed when riff didn't show up for any of the meals for three days straight, even though she avoided any and all questions about it ( it was rare to see the two of them separated; even rarer for mrs. mclellan not to be seen sitting next to her husband during meals, knees brushing under the table or gripping at his hands on the days she looked paler ). earlier, johanna went as far as to snap at lucille for not keeping up with her. if there was one person she never tried to get irritated with, it was lucille who was hardly more than a child. whatever happened, it was worse than the previous times. it was worse than the morning after their wedding night.

avoiding her husband was more difficult than she thought it would be. when he disappeared for those three days, it was him avoiding her. johanna doesn't know going into town alone and despite being the main caretaker of their finances, couldn't bare to spend any of it on an inn. not when they were saving up for a house. both of them are stubborn people. trying to out stubborn the other was like a dog trying to chase it's tail. unlike that dog, they caught up to each other eventually. johanna made him talk about what happened with uncle at some point. riff brought her to a hospital at some point. but they never had an argument like that before. johanna can't remember a single time where she had raised her voice before that. they fought before. over her desire to get a job, over each other's respective health, over the morning after a night that was soft and sweet and the sudden swift in tone afterwards. never a fight like that.

they knew exactly how to hurt each other. they've lived with each other long enough and their names have been on that marriage certificate for enough time that they know exactly what's considered off limits and what's eating the other alive. part of this aching, johanna thinks to herself, is exactly how they've stung each other. she never meant to bring up the judge in comparison to him. she never wanted to confront the ways she's broken so verbally. despite all of the wedding anniversaries that they've celebrated together, the memories associated with being called mine blocked out everything else. johanna didn't want to try to explain herself in words they both understood. she yelled and she hurt him.

he hurt her, too.

she wants to stay hidden where she is. cheek pressed against the wood of the barn. wedding ring ( the one he made from his spoon when they were at the church ), in her lap, two fingers preventing it from falling onto the dirt floor. head swirling with thoughts of how possessive her husband could be and how much she misses him. at the sound of his voice, johanna forces herself not to look at him. she can see riff out of the corner of her eye; not nearly well enough to read his expression, only to tense as if he's come back just to throw another hurtful thing in her face and leave.

he doesn't.

johanna lifts a hand to wipe away a tear.

❝ can you say that? ❞ how else am i supposed to say i love you? what she called possessiveness, he called love. she takes a quivering breath. ❝ can you say that instead of . . . ❞ they both know what she's talking about. instead of calling me "mine." ❝ can we just tell each other that we love them? ❞ as if they were a more normal couple. as if they haven't been through everything that they have. ❝ i love you. i couldn't even go that far from you. i've just been waiting . . . ❞ she doesn't bother to wipe away any more of her tears as she looks back at him. to see the hurt in his expression. ❝ i'm sorry. i said horrible things. i'm sorry. ❞

#now look. you said that the level of messed up it has to be is off the charts.#and i was rereading the 'mine' thread last night and it hasn't been more screwed up than that. so.#i was literally sobbing while writing this if it makes you feel any better #*❈ ‣ how is it that you sing anything? — ( interaction. )#*❈ ‣ don’t need a ring for my finger just need a steady hand to hold — ( v. main. feat. heygutlcss )#heygutlcss #ask to tag /#long post tw #this has been sitting in my inbox for literally six months dgjdkhj

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