#i am deeply

[gardenofnoah]

i did not mean to write this. and yet, here we are. nanami breaks my heart every day. i'm debating whether to make this a multi-part thing because personally i am a fan of make up sex but we'll see wc: 1.2k cw: conflict in established relationship (this is the comfort part)

You’ve been in the kitchen for at least an hour now—standing over the cutting board on the counter, making no move to slice up the vegetables in front of you. Really, all you’ve done is put water in a pot and set it on the stovetop—you didn’t even turn it on. By now you know it’s a lost cause, cooking— but it would be effort you’re not willing to expend to move from the spot where your feet feel like they’re trapped in cement. Because leaving the kitchen means walking past the living room, where you know Kento sits, and if you see him and he looks at you with that face you will split apart at your seams.

You should apologize. You should go out there and tell him you love him because that is what any sensible human being would do for someone they care about after they’ve hurt them. But you can’t, so you don’t. You can’t, because saying the words you’ve been screaming inside you aloud will make this real, and if it’s real then he will have a tangible reason to walk out of this house and never look back. You wouldn’t blame him.

You’d regretted it the moment it left your lips. What he'd said to you cut you deep, and your mouth opened almost automatically. You saw the way it registered with him—shocking at first, that expression quickly replaced by what you knew to be incredible hurt. He said nothing—just turned from you and walked to the bedroom, gently shutting the door behind him. Leaving you to stand in your shame that ricocheted off the walls, cutting you down over and over again. If he was packing his things in there, who could’ve blamed him? It’d be a long time coming.

You’d been at each other’s throats for weeks. Kento was chronically late getting home and you were irritable and distant and standoffish, and it dawned on you that you don’t know which one came first. You don’t even remember how tonight’s argument started—it didn’t feel like it mattered anymore, with the way it escalated—it was something that had been building for far too long and had come to a head the moment you opened your mouth. You might as well have told him he was worthless, with the way you’d cherry-picked your worst words for him. You knew they would hurt him and you said them anyway, that’s what you did when you were hurt and afraid—you’d lash out like an animal caught in a trap. The weight of the aftermath, this time, was more than you could hold.

“Sweetheart?”

A string of expletives leaves your lips as the knife you’d been holding clatters against the cutting board. You spin around, trying to steady your breathing as you take in the man now standing in front of you. The man who is certainly too close and looking far too vulnerable for the way you just punched a hole through his chest. You could feel yourself tense, bracing for impact. The one you get is almost more devastating than the one you’d been expecting.

“Be sweet,” he murmurs gently, lips brushing over your temple. He reaches his arms around your shoulders, one hand coming up to tangle itself in the hair on the back of your head.

“You first,” you sniffle, and you jab him in the side lightly before you allow your fist to unfurl and curl around his shirt, pulling him to you. It’s not what you wanted to say, but you hope he hears what you meant.

“I love you,” he tells you. There’s a soft smile stretching across his face—tentative, like he knows he’s pushing his luck, but he thinks it’s safe to do so— and it is. You need him like you need air. You want to hear him say it again, but you can’t bear to ask. Can’t bear to put him through anything more tonight.

“I’m sorry,” you croak, and he presses another kiss to your hairline. You bury your face in his chest and squeeze your eyes shut, too proud to let him see you cry again. He knows anyway—of course he does—and you feel his arms tighten around you. He presses kisses to the crown of your head and whispers his love to you again. Your grip on his shirt tightens. Anything to tether you here—the alternative, to be without him, is unbearable.

“I don’t want you to leave,” you confess, and it’s barely audible, but you assume he’s heard by the way his grip on you turns to that of a vice.

“Sweetheart,” his voice is strained, and the guilt squeezes around your gut, “look at me, please.”

You take in a shuddering breath to steel your resolve, and you lift your head up to meet his gaze. All you see is hurt. You think he might actually cry, and it breaks your heart again.

“There is no reality that exists in which I belong anywhere but where you are. Do you know that?”

And you can’t say anything. How could you? You can’t tear yourself from his gaze, because he’s showing you everything. He’s torn himself apart just to let you see inside. He does so, full of fear that you’ll reject what you’ve found. He does it anyway.

“We will let each other down—there will be days where you are certain you can’t bear to look at me again, and there will be days where I feel the same. But we’ll still choose to love each other. We’ll still choose to be here.”

You shake in his arms at his words. You’ve not said a thing since your quiet admission, and it doesn’t thwart him at all. He keeps talking—keeps shredding your insides with the love he lets drip off of him like he has spare to give away. You’re bleeding out in front of him and he holds you tighter. Holds you together.

“Do you still love me?”

You look at him, incredulous. “Of course I do,” and it comes out sharper than you intended. He doesn’t flinch. He exhales, like it’s a relief. You think it should feel like a life sentence.

“Do you know that I love you?”

“Yes,” you breathe, and you feel tears well up in your eyes again—your entire body is screaming to look away, to get away—to leave before his love swallows you whole, but you don’t. He’s rooted you to him. You’re surprised that it doesn’t hurt like you thought it would. Not in the ways that would really be damaging.

“Okay,” he whispers, cradling your head against his chest to tuck you under his chin, holding you tightly to him, “okay.”

You let go of his shirt for the first time and let your arms wrap around him, holding him tightly. You feel the tension in his muscles subside—like he was waiting (hoping) for you to hold him upright. He trembles slightly in your arms and you hold him tighter.

“Ken,” your whisper is soft against the fabric of his T-shirt, and he sucks in a breath at the familiar way you shorten his name, “can we go to bed?”

“Yes,” he says wetly, pressing a kiss to the top of your head, “let’s go to bed, my love.”

this fic belongs to me (@b-writes-things). i do not allow anyone to repost, edit, or reproduce this work.

#nanami #nanami kento #jjk nanami #jujutsu kaisen nanami #nanami x reader #nanami x you #nanami x gn reader #nanami writing #nanami fic #i am deeply #deeply #projecting here #bwritesthings #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #i just want to date this man #and love him everyday until i die

[kurjakani]

I dont wanna hyperfocus on arcana i dont wanna i d

#Arkani #The problem is #I am deeply #Un attracted to the main six aside from like. Muriel and nadia & portia a lil bit. #Bawling froeing uo #Kanitalk

[hawkpartys]

POV you made a popular post about insects

#inaturalist #naturalist #nature #ecology #zoology #biology #insect #insects #bug #bugblr #entomology #bugs #hawk screeches #yes i am deeply petty. dont worry about it

[monstertidbits]

ryoko kui is hands down the queen of character design

#she included so many new elven dwarven and half foot characters in the new daydream hour... i am so deeply in love with her work #aaaah her dark skinned characters... the dark skinned dwarven lady... aaaaahhhh!!! #had to include the pages from daydream hour 3 with the ogres and kobolds to make it complete #shes the best of the best of the best #dungeon meshi

[pinkiepig]

when the moon covers the sun, they finally get to see eye to eye,,☀️🌙

bonus:

✨Lofi beats to clean ur daycare to✨

#Fnaf #fnaf security breach #fnaf ruin #my art #procreate #artwork #illustration #sundrop #moondrop #fnaf eclipse #it was good drawing them again :3 #I went to crazy with the colors I am deeply sorr

[secondbeatsongs]

as a bi person, the bisexual flag brings me infinite joy and always puts a smile on my face, however as a person who has a Passion for Graphic Design, that undersaturated shade of purple infuriates me when it's used digitally

like, on an actual flag - which was its original purpose - it looks great!

those look fine! lovely, even! with the semi-transparent fabric, the way it catches the sunlight, it looks beautiful!

but now look at how it looks digitally

the pink and blue are so vibrant compared to the sad, lonely lavender!

and let's look at this statement from Michael Page, the creator of the bi flag:

(sidenote: he created this flag in 1998, so if his takes on bisexuality is different from yours, it's okay to notice that! a lot has changed since the 90s when it comes to lived experiences and the way we describe them. but, it's also important to respect his thoughts about this and the way he presented them, even if today, we'd probably not say that bi people "blend unnoticeably into both the gay/lesbian and straight communities.")

so in pantone colors, the pink is 226 C, the blue is 286 C, and the purple of the flag is 258 C.

but...here's the deal

Michael talks here about how the key to understanding the symbolism is to know that the purple blends into both the pink and blue. and on a physical flag, I think you can see that!

but digitally, it absolutely does not blend. it clashes badly, and looks oddly separate from the other two colors.

which got me wondering...what purple do you get if you actually blend 226 C and 286 C?

oh! oh, my god.

look at that! look at how nicely it fits between those colors!

look at it next to the original color scheme! look at how much more vibrant the purple is!

and friends. this is just blending through rgb! you get even more purple variations when you use other color spaces!

let's compare all of them:

(top: original, lab. middle: lrgb, lch. bottom: rgb, hsl)

look at all of the different purple options you can get just by combining these two colors!

if you want almost too-vibrant saturation, you can go hsl, if you want something more relaxed that's closer to the original, you can go lab or lrgb. and if you want to split the difference, lch is bright and violet, while rgb is there with its saturated but darker purple.

anyway, I guess I don't really have a point here? this isn't so much an informational post as it is Me Getting Weird About Colors, but I think it is a useful lesson about how colors look very different on screens compared to how they look on objects in real life.

and sometimes, I think it's okay to compensate for that.

out of all of these, this is my favorite bi flag:

it's the one where the colors were blended in lab color space. for me, the lighter, softer purple is close enough to the original bi flag purple, while also feeling like a smoother blend of the blue and pink

but that's just me! and it might not even look the same to you, since every screen is different, because technology is a nightmare!

anyway, thank you for coming with me on this colorful journey! I will now retreat back to inkscape and make pained sounds about inkstitch gradients until something tangible pulls me back into reality

#bi #bisexual #bisexuality #bi flag #bisexual flag #sbs rambles #graphic design is my passion #id in alt text #but #the ids are probably deeply unhelpful for the different variations of flags #in the alt text of the six flags all grouped together #I just put what method the purples were blended with #and then tried to describe them more in the paragraph below #but this is an inherently visual post #so if you're reading it with a screen reader I am sorry :(

[pixelizedprince]

#bg3 #gale of waterdeep #gale bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #baldur's gate 3 #gale dekarios #im sorry to make another one and i know this isnt funny like the other one but i am so deeply loving him #abraca-arrows

[ciil]

what makes us any different?

#my art #alien stage #alien stage spoilers #i finally scratched the itch in my brain just a lil #anyways i am fondly thinking abt comic of ivan antagonizing sua and respectfully sir ur a clown (me saying this while crying) #tfw ur both dead eyed dark haired high achievers who love deeply and would risk it all for ur person #i love that they r so similar in the lengths they'll go to but they're also like ewwww at each other #ivan and sua alien stage u'll always be famous to me

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Bonus 8: How met your mother (CSSR design by @qourmet!)

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #cangse sanren #wei changze #jiang fengmian #It was important to me that WCZ had the hereditary mole. I will die on this hill. #I have been *waiting* for the day to finally arrive when I could finally make this comic. It's been marinating for months. #My mission is to redraw all of qour's character designs one day. They are just *that* good. #CSSR has the vibes of a wandering menace who shows up in towns like a stray cat arriving at a new doorstep for treats. 10/10. #While YZY strongly leads us to believe that JFM was in love with CSSR and that's his whole motivation behind taking wwx in- #-I do think this is (once again) rumour being presented as reality. It's the juicer story to tell after all. #It is still possible that he did love her! But I think that story undercuts the relationship he also had with WCZ. #Yall ever think about how JC and WWX parallel their fathers? How Wei Changze also left the Jiang Leader's side? I do. #Unlike JC though It is far more hilarious and plausible to imagine JFM begging to be CSSR and WCZ's third. You know he would. #My wild headcanon is that JFM and YZY are in a mlm and wlw arranged marriage situation. Deeply unhappy as partners. Better as friends. #they care for each other and I'll admit that there is a beautiful tragedy in them having romantic feelings for each other the whole time. #But I am also here for the gaffs. Let them be unfulfilled homosexuals together. #Meanwhile cssr and wcz are having incredible hetrosexual sex in a bisexual way that WILL leave him pregnant by the end of it.

[sentientsky]

why do they do this. every time !!!!

#was watching the idiots lantern and LO AND BEHOLD DAVID TENNANT LICKS SOMETHING #i watched jodie whittaker eat dirt the other day and instantly fell truly deeply madly in love. thirteen i would devote my life to u #they're so silly i love themb #anyway this was originally a meme for alex but u guys can have it too ig. it's 2 am so i'm going to BED. good NIGHT!!!! #doctor who #shitpost #david tennant #jodie whittaker #tenth doctor #thirteenth doctor #doctor who meme #dw #doctor who shitpost

[dogerbooger]

Roomies

The original !

#Sorry this is deeply unserious it will happen again #Also if any of yall thought i would make any form of angst with them you are sorely mistaken #They get to be silly. as a lil treat IS THAT SO BAD #I am just /joking #life series #trafficblr #life series fanart #mcyt fanart #secret life #secret life fanart #secret life smp #slsmp fanart #grian fanart #zombiecleo fanart #ethoslab fanart #roomies #dogieboogie art

[frodo-a-gogo]

Let us be brutally honest with ourselves and with eachother for a moment. If he weren't obese you motherfuckers would be capable of percieving evrart claires sexy sexy moral ambiguity and complex charms

#i am (lesbian) sipping him like a fine DESSERT WINE #my evidence by the way is very simple and very damning. joyce messier. there i said it. #if you guys can appreciate the fact that Joyce is a complex figure worthy of disgust yes but also worthy of empathy #despite being a venal coward facilitating acts of violence and slaughter of the organized working poor of martinaise in the name of capital #if you can understand that she is a dimensional figure while also being an embodiment of the moral apathy and cruelty if capital owners #but you cant look at evrart and see that he is (while deeply flawed and morally suspect) also a dimensional figure #on top of the fact that his motivations are eminently relatable and dare i say it baser #and his greatest failing imho is in failing to advocate for the interests of *all* the poor of martinaise #opting instead to marginalize the inhabitants of the fishing village in favor of a power grab in the interests of himself and his union #though this is imo a bit of a grey area morally. undeniably a wrong and bad thing to do but done in service of clairs political goals #to gather power to advocate for the working class against ultraliberal monoliths like wild pines and fascistic orgs like krenel #still super wrong but i can follow the moral arithmetic there tho i don't like it #but like my point is if u can see that joyce is evil and pathetic but still cool and sexy but you consider clair flatly distasteful #thats cus hes not conventionally attractive #cus he is *every bit* as dimensional and interesting as joyce and he is not nearly as politically shite even if hes interpersonally a jerk

[howdify]

TRESPASSER!

#melanie king #she is so special to me #melanie king the magnus archives #the magnus archives #art #magpod #magnus pod #tma #magnus archives #artists on tumblr #audio drama #i am deeply unwell #how do i tag on tumblr #i never post here

[aziraphalalala]

Hey! Hey, Michael Sheen. Come here. I need to talk to you.

I need to talk to you about what the hell even is your face!!!

Explain yourself immediately. How can you just

what even are is do

are you a real-life angel because I am not sure it's humanly possible to make actual heart eyes

And yet here you are. OK. But wait, I'm upset and I have more.

Will you please just explain this to me because my brain has decided to permanently cease functioning and I can't

Excuse you sir

Did you just grab him by the hips and help him walk and THEN just leaned in when he scolded you and made all this in this here expression with your actual face and made me feel things

Without!!! Speaking!!! A. Single. Word!!!!

I am pretty certain you're breaking the UN Human Rights Declaration by doing this sort of acting and breaking our shriveled little shipper hearts.

Yes, you know exactly what you're doing. The notes probably said "fondly", and you went "Aziraphale looks at Crowley and sees the most inviting ox rib in existence" and don't you dare deny it. We see you.

Come answer for your crimes sir

#This is becoming a Michael Sheen love/hate blog #Am I finding this a problem? #Hmm #I am going to go with NO #I continue to be deeply unwell about good omens #good omens #ineffable husbands #ineffable idiots #aziraphale #crowley #michael sheen #crowley x aziraphale #good omens season 2 #Screaming about Sheen

[obsob]

autism 2 autism communication

#mine #original #orange overlay pink multiply layer my beloved #what hve i done today.....done some face studies!! very helpful!! #i am . beginning...to find.....a way of drawing that feels comfy to me...ouh #i will hopefully do some portfolio drawing tomorrow hehe #im going to re do my website...how it is now is. ugly. i wouldnt hire me #what else is going on...ive ordered some wool bc i hve learnt how to KNIT #im so alarmed. im going to attempt to make a cardigan i am so deeply alarmed #i need to exercise and have a bath. mmm. i will play vid game and then chores and then exercise and then eat and then bath #hve a good evening my friends

[miyakuli]

Bonus

#helluva boss #EXCUSE ME BUT THAT EPISODE WAS SO SWEET IN SO MANY WAYS #AND THOSE SCENES TOUCHED ME DEEPLY #WTF AM I STILL WATCHING A CARTOON ABOUT HELL BECAUSE IM MELTING BY THE FLUFF THAN THE FLAMES OF HELL x'DDD #cute #my gifs #my posts #wtf tumblr is ruining the quality of the gifs ;__; looks better in my files