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sturncrazy · 5 months

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New Camera 🔥

Matt Sturniolo x y/n (fem)

warnings: SMUUUUUTTT NSFW 18+ (umm lots. use of camera/recording, dom matt, degrading, slapping, language, daddy kink, slight choking, unprotected, creampie, j very rough)

authors note: so this won the vote for which y’all wanted first! ask and u shall receive! this one is FILTHY AND KINKY so if that’s not ur vibe, uve been warned…also side note, i feel like this goes without saying but, i write mostly unprotected… guys pls don’t actually do that. wrap it before u tap it🫶 ok luv u!! enjoy!!

summary: your boyfriend matt gets a new camera before going on tour and decides to experiment with it on you…

word count: 2,270 w

~you look good on camera baby let’s go make a film~

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your phone buzzed on your desk.

“be over in 10 babe ❤️” read a message from matt. you went back to fixing your makeup in the mirror, wanting to look your best for your boyfriends last night home. Matt was about to leave to go on tour tomorrow and it would be a month and a half before you got to see him again. even though you were excited for him, you wanted to make sure it was extra hard for him to leave you. after swiping on some lip gloss, you rummaged through your closet and landed on a thin white tank and flannel shorts. comfy, but still cute and showed just the right amount of skin to hopefully get his attention. your doorbell rang and you ran to answer it.

“hi, beautiful” matt said, pulling you in for a kiss.

“hi” you said smiling at him, the chill from outside hitting your mostly bare skin. he closed the door and walked in. his eyes gave you a once over as he took off his coat.

“you look hot” he smirked

“oh yeah?” you replied coyly, turning to head back down the hall.

“yeah. some shorts” he chuckled out, blatantly checking out your ass.

“what these?” you teased, bending over slightly

“don’t start with me, y/n” matt came up behind you and slapped your ass, playfully but hard. the two of you walked to your room and you flopped on your bed, reaching for the remote to your tv. matt followed and unzipped his backpack, rummaging through it and pulling out a box.

“whatcha got there?”

“bought a new vlog camera for tour!” he answered, excitedly

“wanna see?” he sat down next to you, showing off the new device.

“oooo fancy” you knew nothing about cameras, but pretended to be impressed since matt was so enthusiastic. his fingers whizzed around the buttons.

“it’s got awesome quality and it’s so easy to use” he continued, the machine chirped as he hit the red button and pointed it at your face.

“matttt” you whined, covering your face with your hands.

“what are you being camera shy?” he snickered, standing above you continuing to point the lens at you.

“cmon show me that gorgeous face of yours baby” you huffed, dramatically and lowered your hands looking up at him.

“that’s my pretty girl” he cooed, making a smile toy at the corners of your mouth. you could never say no to him. his eyes flicked over you behind the camera and you tried to read what he was thinking. he licked his lips and backed up, silently, getting a wider view of you in frame. you stayed put on the bed.

“take your top off” he stated, flatly.

“matt-what—?” you nervously laughed out

“did i say it was a question? take your top off” something about the harshness of his tone was so out of character it made your heart race. you reached for the hem of your tank and began to lift it.

“damn, baby” matt growled out, lowering the camera to capture your exposed tits. you breathed heavily, unable to bring yourself to move from your perched position on the edge of your bed. your eyes followed as his hands lowered the camera even further to where you had your hands in your lap.

“now your shorts”

“but—matt—im not wearing any underwear” you stuttered.

“and?”

“well you’re filming i mean i—“

“if you’re gonna be a little slut and not wear your panties then i get to treat you like a little slut. strip.” he interrupted, gruffly. you couldn’t help but notice how insanely hot he sounded being so demanding, and hoped he wouldn’t be able to see your already obvious wetness. you reached for your waistband, standing, never taking your eyes off him as you began to lower your shorts to the floor. you stepped out of them and kicked them aside. nervousness spread goosebumps across your skin as you became aware of how completely exposed you were to matt and his camera. this was unlike anything you’d ever done before.

“good girl” matt praised, dryly.

“you wanna give me a better view of that pretty little ass of yours and bend over the bed for me?” you felt as vulnerable to matt’s commands as the machine in his hands. you slowly turned half way and rested your hands on your bed, lifting your ass into better view for him.

“fuck” he exhaled. you could feel him move closer behind you. he brought a hand sharply down against your flesh. you whimpered.

“so sexy” he growled.

“got me so hard just looking at you baby” you turned your head back to look at him. he laughed, sinisterly.

“what? you wanna see what you’re doing to me, slut? huh?”

you nodded, dumbly. he snickered again.

“course you do. get on your knees for me.” he demanded. you followed every order like a well trained dog. you settled down by his feet and looked back up at him, as he readjusted the lens again.

“mmmm you look so perfect from this angle, babygirl” he praised stroking your face gently, before slapping his hand against your cheek just enough to sting a bit. your jaw dropped slightly in surprise, which matt took as an opportunity to slid his thumb into your mouth. you sucked at his digit and he groaned, watching you before sliding it back out of your mouth creating a popping sound.

“take off my pants” he commanded. you eagerly fumbled with his belt and zipper, hooking your fingers around the waste and and pulling slowly. his already rock hard dick sprung out and slapped his t shirt. your mouth almost watered in desperation at the sight of his veiny, practically throbbing, member.

“open your mouth, baby” he exhaled. you looked up into the camera, doe eyed and parted your lips with your tongue out slightly. he pumped himself with his free hand, the tip of his dick just grazing your lips and tongue and then began to slowly insert himself into your warm wet mouth. he ran his hand down your head, petting your hair, soothingly, as you took him all the way down the back of your throat. fighting the urge to gag at his size.

“such a good girl” matt groaned. his pets reached the base of your skull, then latched harshly into your hair. his grip was tight, as he began to thrust into your mouth. you felt tears form at the corner of your eyes as he forcefully fucked your throat. matt let his grasp on your hair go and slid himself out of your mouth. he grabbed your jaw and forced you to turn your messy face to him, getting a clear shot of the streaks of tears on your cheeks and spit running down your chin.

“get on your hands and knees. i need to feel that pretty little pussy of yours” he huffed, patting your face again. you scrambled to the bed, desperate to feel him fill you up. you’d never felt so much heat screaming from between your legs in your life. you arched your back, letting matt have perfect access to your dripping folds. matt dragged a finger down them, teasing you and eliciting a loud whine from your lips.

“soaking for me already huh, slut?” he mocked. all you could do in response was whimper.

“so pathetic for me” he taunted, pressing two fingers against your entrance.

“matt—please—“ you breathed out in agony

“camera can’t hear you, baby. be a good little slut and beg louder for me.”

“Matt—fuck—-please—i need your dick now—“ you cried out, the need for contact almost eating away at your brain. you screamed as matt rammed into you, entirely, and without warning. the unprepared sensation of stretch caused a pleasurable pain to radiant through you. he groaned, finally feeling your wet pussy around his torturously hard dick. he began to relentlessly pound into you from behind, filling the room with deafening slapping sounds intermixed with your screams and his grunts.

“MATT—“ you cried out, overwhelmed by his intensity, collapsing your face into the pillows beneath you.

“what? ” he wrapped his free hand around a fistful of your hair and yanked your head back up.

“don’t act like you can’t handle my cock now, slut.” he snarled, not letting up on his unwavering rhythm in and out of your core. he slapped your ass again.

“understand?”

“yes matt” you wheezed. he slapped your ass again.

“yes, who?”

“fuckk—yes, daddy” you sobbed out

“good girl” his thrusts hit your g spot each time, making your legs shake and stars form against your tightly squeezed eyelids.

“you wanna show me how much you love my cock, princess?”

“yes, daddy” you hardly could think straight

“bounce that perfect ass on my cock, baby” he said, slowing his thrusts. you obeyed and began to rock your hips back and forth, fucking yourself on his dick.

“good girl. doing such a good job” he sang out, one hand gripping your flesh while the other captured your movement on film. you whimpered again, your hips stuttering.

“you tired, princess?” you nodded and let out another pathetic sound.

“need daddy to take over again?”

“yes—oh fuck—please daddy-“ you managed to mumble out. Matt pulled out of you abruptly, causing you to whine at the loss. you couldn’t move anymore, but the last thing you wanted was for him to stop fucking you. he slapped your ass again

“turn over” he growled

“i wanna see your pretty face when i cum in your pussy” you felt like you could cum from his filthy requests alone. you’d barely even landed on you back before matt slammed back into your throbbing entrance. he struggled to keep his balance momentarily, too desperate to feel you around him again. he kept one hand supporting himself upright and the other still holding the camera, pointed at you as his picked back up his steady thrusts.

“so perfect—look ss-so good—with my cock stuffed inside your little pussy” he huffed out between thrusts

“OH—fuck—yes—your cock feels so good, daddy” you moaned out, helplessly. your eyes rolling back into your head. matt’s free hand wrapped around your throat, constricting your breathing perfectly.

“watch me while i fuck you, slut” he growled.

“yes, daddy” you wheezed out against his tight grip. he removed his hand and you gasped for air. within moments of his dick pounding perfectly back against your sweet spot, you felt your orgasm begin to crest.

“FUCK—IM—“ you panted.

“that’s it—good girl—cum all over daddy’s cock” he ordered. your walls clenched and throbbed around him uncontrollably, causing him to let out a string of curse words. you felt his dick begin to twitch deep inside you.

“ohh-hh-fuck—shit” he stuttered out, his thrusts becoming wilder and less expertise.

“mmm—close—“ he groaned, his jaw dropping slightly.

“mmmm fuck yeah cum inside me, daddy” you whined out, your high still settling.

“shit yeah baby? you want me to fill your little pussy?”

your brows knotted and your nodded your head desperately.

“fuck i’ll fill you up—so full of cum—baby you’ll look—-so perfect—spilling out of you” he huffed

“OH FUCK FUCK BABY IM GONNA CUM” he cried out as his whole body shook. he thrust deep into you one last time, halting as his cock spasmed against your walls. releasing a multitude of spurts of his hot white load. once matt seemed to regain his senses, he clicked the red button again—ending his taping. he pulled out of you slowly, making your legs shake. he glanced down at your trembling sensitive entrance leaking his release in pulses and bit his lip in a satisfied smirk, snapping one last photo of the mess he’d made of you.

“MATT!” you laughed out in embarrassment, shutting your legs and rolling onto your side.

“sorry…i had to. too hot not save” he said, smiling and flopping down next to you.

“are you okay? was that too much?” he asked, pushing your hair out of your face.

“no way. i loved that”

“you swear i wasn’t too rough with you?” he said with worry. you shook your head vigorously

“not at ALL! that was HOT” you replied through a smile. he fought a grin, biting his lip clearly extremely pleased at your enthusiasm.

“so can i ask what inspired the camera?” you questioned.

“well, now on tour i can reminisce what it’s like to fuck my crazy hot girlfriend” he smiled at the ceiling.

“hey!” you slapped his chest playfully “you know you can always facetime me and we cannnnn” you dragged your words out, looking off into the distance above his face in teasing suggestion.

“oh don’t you worry, we’ll have phone sex all the time. this is just for when you can’t call me and i need to…y’know” he glanced down at his crotch.

“jesus, how many times are you planning on jerking off” you teased

“twice a day. minimum.” he matter of factly stated, grinning again.

“MATTHEW!” you scoffed out in shock

“What? not my fault you’re so sexy” he laughed, leaning in to give you a peck on the lips.

“yeah yeah whatever. just NEVER show that to anyone”

“are you kidding me? you think i’d ever let anyone else get a look at you like that? nhhuhh nope.” he shook his head dramatically

“only i get to see how perfect you look getting your brains fucked out” he leaned in, kissing you playfully again. you giggled, feeling a slight blush.

“i love you, you freak” you said against his lips.

“i love you more, baby”

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ok y’all were on to something with wanting this one cause WHY DO I LOVE IT?? rly hope everyone likes it ahhh 🫶🫶

also guys imagine matt accidentally posting the wrong video and posts ur tape instead of a car video?? HAHA

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creamecafe · 1 month

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Dating MCU!Peter Parker HCs

Pairing: MCU!Peter Parker x GN!Reader (No pronouns used)

Warnings: none just fluff and suggestive themes but nothing explicit, mostly allusions.

Before finding out he's Spider-Man

Sweetest boyfriend to exist

He loves you crazy much

Golden retriever vibes (More like Brown Retriever because of his hair but you get the point)

Doesn't know what to do with PDA

You guys could be dating for a month or a year and he still doesn't know whether to hold your hand or put your hand around your waist

Loves building Legos with you

Study dates are a must have for him

After finding out he's Spider-Man

Finding out he was Spider-Man was a huge roller coaster

I mean him hiding a secret from you that he's Spider-Man? Not a chance in the world could he cover it up.

The poor boy couldn't even hide that he had the hugest crush on you since Kindergarten

Aunt May loves you. Like a lot

She would let you sleep over if you had no place to go.

Gives you food, drives you and Peter around, basically treating you like she would treat Peter

Jokes about you and Peter doing something naughty

"Oh I'm so sorry, I should've knocked. What are you guys up to?"

"Hi Aunt May, we're just studying

"Oh alright, if you're going to be "studying", make sure you use protection. I could go to the store right now to get you some condoms."

"Aunt May!"

Being awesome friends with Ned, MJ, and Betty (Flash tries to act like a friend but is only nice to Peter because your dating him)

Flash would hit on you even though you gave multiple signs that your not interested in him

Peter just gets worried that he's not enough for you.

He's insecure of how much money he has, if your bored of him, etc.

But you always tell him you love him and don't care how much he has

Sharing playlists with him on Spotify is love language to him (No premium, but that's ok because you guys have memorized the ads to keep you guys entertained)

Upside down kisses makes him weak (or is it the blood rushing to his head when's he upside down?)

Swings around New York with you to help ease stress or to spend time with you

Talks about you a lot to the Avengers and especially Tony

Could never forgive himself if you ever got hurt or Worse

But you assure him nothing will happen to you

He's such a aftercare sweetie

Gives you water, snacks and hugging you close

Praises you saying you did a good job and if he did anything that you didn't like or what he could do better

Loves discussing about the future with you

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ellaa-writes · 9 months

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The Beast Within

author note: Part 1. Part 2 here. I wrote something close to this story on my first blog but I decided to redo it and maybe make it into a series? Anyways Alpha König is back! Alpha König headcanon can be found here. Will help with understanding this König. masterlist

summary: Omegas are rare, in a world full of Alphas and Betas. Being a Omega was not only dangerous but they were highly sought after. After living your life has a Beta in disguise, you meet a scary Alpha, but not any normal alpha. But a gaint Apex Alpha who won't stop at anything to make you his.

tags: 18+ only, slightly dub-con/non-con. Kidnapping vibes, Alpha/Omega dynamics. Female reader Mentions of alcohol and blood. Marking/biting. This is an Alternative Universe (which will be expanded). No smut in this but their will be eventual smut. vague mentions of nudity. Not proof read.

This was dangerous but it was exhilarating. The adrenaline coursing through your body gave you the sweetest high. You were in a packed night club somewhere in central Europe. The special blend of herbs and modern day pharmaceuticals that your best friend Kalina gave to you earlier, helping to mask your true identity. You were an Omega, which is very rare in this day and age. And there had to be at least hundreds of Alphas packed into this dimly lit club, bodies grinding on bodies. The musky smell and loud music filling the air.

Your friends got a private table on the 2nd floor, above the dance floor you were currently looking down on. You should be at home, preparing for you next heat that is only a couple of days away. But you've had a rough week at work, wanting nothing more but to feel the buzzing numbness from the alcohol. Turning back to your friends, one of them sliding a shot glass in your direction. Grabbing it and holding it in that air with the others. Bringing it to your lips and savouring the burning liquid. Joining the rest in slamming the small glass back in the table. One of your friends already trying to flag the bottle girl down for another round of shots. You sink was feeling warm and sticky, the alcohol doing its job. You closed you eyes for a second, enjoying the music and the vibration it sent through your body. But there was something else, something different.

It began creeping up your slow spine, goosebumps forming in its path up to the back of your neck. Where it bit down and stung, your reflexes acting out you touched your neck. Trying to find any indication you were bitten, but there was nothing. That strange feeling was sitting heavy in your stomach, it was either the 3 shots and 2 margheritas you had or the world was about to end. You slowly turned back towards the dance floor, but it wasn't down below. It was sitting across, in another private section. His eyes were burning flames of ember staring into you with such a fierceness that it scared you a bit. Your best friend reached out touching your arm which snapped you out of the trance you were in. Bringing you back to your surroundings. She looked at you with concern "You feeling ok?" she began rubbing her hand up and down your arm. You gave her a smile, nodding you head "Yeah, yes... I'm good. Just getting a little warm that's all." you let her know. A few of your friends began cheering when the server brought over another tray of shots. Making you and her to laugh, joining in and grabbing the glass from the tray before it was lifted away." Hold on, wait up. I just wanted to say, that I love you all so much and let's all hopefully get laid tonight. Alright, good!" Meave said, she was the oldest out of your group. Her gorgeous red hair danced around her shoulders while she did her speech, looking right into your eyes when she mention getting laid. Which made you blush, feeling a little embarrassed that she even said that. But it wouldn't be true to Meave. Her and Kalina are cousins, after meeting Kalina in year 1 you three became inseparable. "Oh don't listen to her babe." another one of your other friends whispered into your ear, making you giggle. You took the shot, setting the glass back down. You all but almost forgot about the stranger staring you down. But another stinging bite at the base of your neck, making you jump and yulp out of shock. Kalina and Maeve looking at you with concern. "I think something bit me" you yelled out, making a few of them laugh. You didn't notice it, when Kalina found the same eyes you saw earlier. The same uneasy feeling washed over her, she knew what he was. She could feel the power radiating off of the Alpha, but he wasn't just any ordinary Alpha. He was an Apex Alpha, she knew you were in danger. Apex Alphas were stronger than a normal Alpha, not just in psychical strength but mentally too. Their senses highented, making them damn nearly a God. At one point in history they were viewed as the closest thing to a demi-God, many believing they were the most special, having the blood and DNA of the gods running through them.

She grabbed you arm quickly standing up and pulling you up with her. Laughing you asked her "What's going on" trying to balance in the heals that Meave borrowed to you. "We need to go, like right now." she began pulling you towards the stairs, ignoring the calls from the others. She lead you down the steps, through the bodies and to the entrance of the club. "Hold up, Kalina. What the hell is going on." you tried pulling back, to slow her down but her grub only got stronger while she dragging through the exit and out onto the street. "Hey Kalina, talk to me." you tried getting in front of her. Trying to get her attention, but Kalina was in flight mode. Searching the street for any sign of taxi, when she found one she marched right over with you still in tow. Banging in the front passenger window, catching the driver off guard. "Are you running?" she asked quickly, the driver bossing his head and unlocking the door. "Hurry, get in. Quickly." she said while opening the back seat door and shoving you in. "Kalina what the fuck is going on." you asked while she closed the door. Reaching for the window down button. "Please get home and lock up immediately. I'll tell you later." she told you. She then went back to the front window and gave the driver your address before he quickly pulled away from the street and towards the direction of your small apartment.

You sat in the back seat, confused and starting to feel sick. The alcohol turning into bricks in your stomach.

Kalina watched has the taxi drove away, praying you'd get home safe and listen to her and lock up. Hoping that the Alpha would lose your sent. She turned back towards the club, noticing the Alpha storming out. His nose high in the air, sniffing you out. His eyes snapped towards her, her own fear taking over. She should have gotten in the car with you, but now she's in the path between a angry honey alpha and sweet omega pussy. She always pittied you, when you were young and coming into puberty. She could smell the changes happening to you, they were different than hers. She was a simple beta, but you became an omega. She knew the rarity of it, she also knew the risk of began one. Many of the omega being snatched up, nothing more than breeding machines to produce more alphas, female or male. She began helping you mask your smell at a young age and disguising yourself as a beta.

Sticking her head up high and ignoring the heated look he was giving her. She began to make her way back inside, but not before being pulled to the side by a pair of very thick solid fingers. The alpha had her corned, looking down at her. His nostrils flaring with anger, his chest rising and falling. He was trying to control himself, trying to push the animal that was inside him down. "Where is she." he said in between breaths. Kalina yanked her arm back "None of your business, now will you please excuse me." she began to move past the alpha but he grabbed her again. "Get off me." she yelled. Causing the bouncer and a few others to look in their direction. "You can't hide her forever." he called out to Kalina as she disappeared back inside. She hoped he was wrong.

You made your way inside you one bedroom apartment. Closing the door and locking in behind you. Your feet were sore and your head felt heavy. Walking into your kitchen to grab and glass of water. Standing in the dark, debating if you should wash your face or deal with the consequences in the morning. Refilling the glass you slowly walked to your small bathroom, turning the light on which made you wince. Pulling your hair back and using your expensive cleanser, one of the few things you splurge on. You found yourself kicking off the heals and peeling the tight dress you hand on off and falling into your bed. Only wearing the silky panties you had on, pulling the blankets down and over your body. Sleep found you quickly, drifting off into dreamland.

You woke a few hours later to what sounded like banging. You sat up in your bed, the blanket having fallen to your hips. Your tits out in the open, the air was cold causing your nipples to perk up. Listening in the dark for anymore noises and not hearing anything else you laid back down. Snuggling into your pillow, ready to fall back to sleep. But you heard your bedroom door slowly creak open. Your eyes snapped open, every hair on your body standing straight up. The same stinging from earlier made its way to the base of your neck again.

You instinctively reached out to your phone, but before you could full grab it. It was thrown across the room and you were flipped over on your back. The blanket that was covering your chest now on the floor. Thick hard fingers found themselves around your throat. The same burning ember eyes from the club were looking down at you. You didn't get a good look at him before, but you could see him clearly now. He was massive, not only in size but also in height. His head had to be nearly touching the ceiling. He was looking at with with such intense lust, the corners of his mouth turning up into a smirk. "I found you." was all he said before he removed his hand from your throat and brought his mouth to replace it. You could feel his hot breath fanning out over you jaw and down your chest. He pushed his nose into the vein that ran down the side, lightly licking its trail down to your crease were you neck net your shoulders. He paused a bit before he opened his jaw and bit down hard. Causing you to screaming and thrash, trying to push this gaint off of you. The trance you were in breaking and the panic and fear consuming you. Your screams got louder before his hand found its place over your mouth. "Shhh, darling. It's ok, I found you. Your safe now." he whispered into the side of your temple. Having released your neck, you could feel the blood drip down your back and onto the sheets below you. You began feeling dizzy, your vision getting blurry. He was still cooing into your temple, lightly kissing it and brushing his free hand over your hair. Trying to easy your fear and pain. You were stronger than he thought, fighting his trance once again. Once he felt you go limp in his arms, he let you go. Moving towards your closet, pulling out a shirt to cover you up with. He needed to cover you up, he knew if he didn't he would lose control. The beast in him still snarling and growling to get out.

#könig #modern warfare ii #cod mw2 #konig #könig mw2 #konig mw2 #könig x reader #konig x reader #König au #Alpha König #modern warfare 2 #a/b/o dynamics

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creativewritersposts · 6 days

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fucked up - Nico Hischier

summary; Nico Hischier x reader.

The honest opinion from a person you really like can hurt the most. But what if Nico regrets it?

warning(s); bad language, angst, argument, fluff, maybe grammar errors

author's note; based on a true story. I'm sorry for not posting "happy-clappy fluff imagines" like usually (promise they'll come back soon). I can't write just pure fluff when I'm crying a river.

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It's the third day in a row that Nico doesn't want to talk with you. You can't explain why, but your stomach feeling tells you, something is not okay. You tried to distract yourself with work, work and more work. But when you step in your apartment, you're mentally break down. Your overthinking says hello. You grab your phone, trying to call him, just his mailbox.

"What did I do wrong", you mumble to yourself, biting on your lip. It's rainy outside, like how you feel. You're starring at other people out of the window, until your phone vibrates. "hello?", you start the conversation without looking on the screen, who it is. "it's Nico, are you at home?", his voice sounds deep and kinda annoyed, "yes", you smile, happy to hear he's alive. "Ok bye", he hangs up without a second. You stress yourself to cook a nice dinner in an hour until the door bell rings. "hi baby!", you want to wrap your arms around his neck, but he pushes you politely away, "we need to talk, something is bothering me", his brown eyes let you feel confused, he never been so serious. You nod and let him walk in your kitchen. "I cooked dinner for us two", you smile to blow the negative vibes away. "Do you think dinner will change the fact you act exaggerate?!", his tall body turns around because he stands before you. "huh?", you're even more confused. "We're not together and you stress me out", he tolerates no argument whilst speaking. Honestly you're not able to argue. It's like a punch in your face. "what did I do?", you feel so small. Even when he told you this in a respectful way. "you stress me out. You want to text non-stop and you're not my girlfriend, not yet. After last night with five text messages I'm thinking if it's a good idea to ask you for that", Nico grabs your shaky hands,"it's not like I'm not interested anymore", he kisses your forehead. You're just able to nod and accept the fact. What he needs and wants.

"Thank you for telling me this", your fake smile shows sadness. Nico doesn't want to hurt you on purpose. "I'll pack in the pesto for you", with blurry eyes you do that, giving him the lunch box. Nico just stays calm, taking it and when you close the door behind you, he thinks of hoping you understood what he meant.

The next days your chest feels heavy, texting no message, you don't call him, you let him his freedom. You know Nico lost the finals of the world championship, he looked so disappointed and usually you would at least send him something lovely, but your brain tells you; you were clingy. You're the problem. You're a bad Person for bothering someone. You don't enjoy being a clingy girl.

In the middle of night your phone vibrates again, like ten times until you groan, you're not in the shape to talk happy phone calls. "hey, are you ok?", his voice sounds occupied. "Sure", you reply. "You didn't text me once. I'm worried. We lost", he let you know the news. Of course you're not saying that you watched his game. Like he gave you a clear message. You would be clingy you're not his girlfriend and he owes you nothing.

"I'm sorry to hear that", your hands shake again. You don't feel comfortable anymore, more like you have to hide your personality to be not the problem anymore. "I didn't mean that I don't like to talk with you", he coughs. "I really like you anyway as a person who you are", he talks more. "I'm tired, good night", hanging up until he can hear how much you're hurt. Just thoughts hunting you in your head;

what are you doing now?

What is the right way to deal with this?

#nhl blurb #nhl x reader #nhl hockey #nico hischier #nico hischier blurb #nico hischier fluff #nico hischer x reader #nico hischier angst #nhl angst #nhl imagine

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undercoverpena · 1 year

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ii - it’s just aah little crush

javier peña x f!reader | chapter two of late night texts

summary: It's the year 2000. Javi is minding his own business on the porch of his pop's ranch when a text from an unknown number vibrates his phone. The only problem is, no one knows he has a phone and no one has his number.

chapter warnings: fluff. discussions of deceased parent (javi's side) continuous romcom vibes. an: i can't believe so many of you are in love with this, hope you're still grinning. wordcount: 2.2k.

text key: bold is you/reader | italics is javi

Go to song that’ll get you dancing.

I don’t dance, hermosa

Let me guess, you’re the type to sit in a corner smoking and drinking away while everyone else has fun.

for one I don’t smoke anymore

Ha! Knew it. Bet you have a moody face too. All annoyed that people dare to have fun.

i don’t know what gave you the impression I hate fun

Name a song, then.

I can’t think. what’s yours?

Tough to pick one. But, since I did just dance in my kitchen to I Want It That Way, I’ll choose that one

I bet it was a sight

You are right, it was an award winning performance.

what you wearing

Shut up, Javi.

In time, Javi begins to learn things about you.

Such as your aversion to certain weather types, the kinds of foods you dislike on pizza and that you travel for work.

It’s not every week, but most. You have a place, but you live outside of a suitcase more often than you like. But, you’re not complaining—that you repeatedly stress to him—because you’ve never really had to travel anywhere overtly far. Just from one side of the country to the other.

But, it does steal hours—both from being in the air and entering a new timezone. Something he, too, tries not to feel annoyed about, but still is.

If anything, he’s beginning to find it hard not to be that person, the one who repeats texts—obsessively checks. The one who looks forward to the time of the day he gets to speak to you.

You’re a nice treat at the end of the day—one which has spread into being a welcomed surprise at other times.

The two of you texting, bleeding from the night to the day, with him waking and seeing a text waiting for him on his screen. A ‘Good morning’ here, a ‘hope you don’t stand in shit today’ there.

you land ok

Truthfully, he knew there was a good chance you were still commuting—knowing more about this flight and your plans than previous trips.

But he still grows impatient, tapping his fingers on surfaces, hovering around, earning him stares from his pop as he makes a drink or admires the weather.

He knows his pop has picked up on it—the change. Had stopped asking him in the fields what his plans were going to be that evening, as though knowing he’d find his son on the porch or at the table, clicking keys until they spelt out a word.

But, deep down, Javi knew his Ma would have said something—made a comment about it being a girl. Likely sat next to him, asked him if you were worth the trips to the store and the amount it was all costing him.

He knew what he’d say if she were here to ask: yes.

As much as the change is noticed, his pop says nothing. Just skirts around it, the Peña way.

“You fancy coming with me tonight, Jav?”

He asks him each week, even if the answer is always the same. A hopeful look simmering in his eyes, waiting.

It makes him hate declining, hates having to summon a reason they both know is an excuse. Because even if he’s been here for years, they all still look at him like a hero. A celebrity. A walking statue they can all admire—talk to, and about.

“Not tonight, Pop.”

The nod he receives makes his stomach churn, guilt mixing with selfishness, wanting to explain—even if the two of them have had this conversation countless times.

Just checked into my room. Guess who got an upgrade?

He grins, eyes reading each word, feeling his stomach unknot, his chest flutter—all the while being aware there’s warmth spreading up to his ears.

Texting you makes him feel like a teenager all over again.

So much so, he forgets his pop is still there. Standing, hovering. Glancing up to find a knowing look, one he rather hates but doesn’t want to unpick.

Not sure how too.

Not sure what to even explain.

“Hasta luego, hijo.”

nice, they do room service at this one Maybe. Gonna order so much food, charge the company.

Javi nods to no one, biting back a smile, the one desperate to show. Sliding the paper off the chair beside him as he lies it flat on the table, hearing the distinct sound of the front door shutting, the storm door following closely.

Waiting, just like he did when he was younger, for the sound of the truck sparking to life. The crunch of gravel, and then, the noticeable silence. The one he welcomes—not that he always did.

In the first months of being home, a mist would fall over him when his pop left. A loneliness that ebbed and flowed, him walking around the house, brushing past memories, hearing the whispers of ghosts from when they were a family of three and not two. It lessened as the months added up.

Am I too late for the crossword?

Snorting, he bites his bottom lip.

He’s unsure at what point in their texting he should have told you that he waits for you. Not sure he has the words to explain that it’s become a thing for him, an extra pleasure in completing it.

Javi waits until the sun truly sets, and the day tries to turn to the next. He’s even left it to the last minute—11:36 pm—hating that you even apologised for your day having derailed what has slowly become their tradition.

just in time Perfect. I’ve just put my order in. I am ready. Test me this time, okay? Stop going easy on me.

Smirking, he releases a light laugh, fingers wiping across the hair above his lip, shaking his head in disbelief. Both in how you take it so seriously and how he likes it.

It’s odd, strange—but there’s a lot he likes about you. Like how you challenge him and hold him accountable. Making his old instincts and his gut, both of which had rotted in ranch life, awaken all over again.

In truth, he feels alive, thrumming—feeling warmth, seeing colours, expanding happiness flushing through him. It blows away all the eroding loneliness, shining and injecting light into the darkest corners of his soul—the parts wilted due to what-ifs and regrets.

superheros home, 10 letters I said test me. I’m warming you up I’m plenty warm, Javi. You worry about yourself. It’s metropolis, the answer.

His mouth slides to the side, pencil scratching at the paper.

Crosswords end too quickly with you. Your brain is full of words, ones he knows are tucked away in his own, but they rise to the surface in yours. Come so quickly, called and answered.

Somedays, he swears it takes him a while even to welcome the day, never mind finding a word.

It’s the truthful reason he began this in the first place. It helped that it wasn’t a risk. There was no real need to complete it (yet he always did). But in truth, he had felt the need to keep himself sharp. To work a mystery over, just one with no stakes, no actual losses.

His life couldn't handle that now. His back twinged at the thought, a muscle tensing under the thoughts of Colombia.

praises lavishly, 6 Javier. ha no it begins with e Extols. howd you even know that I read, Javi. I read.

pop’s just asked me if I want to go to a bingo night

I’m going to hazard a guess that you screamed yes, dressed so quickly you have headrush?

obviously

I’m cooking for my friend tonight.

Aish?

No. Different friend.

a male friend

Jealous, are we?

No, a colleague. She’s had a rough day.

do you know how to cook or will I be finally seeing your face… on the news

I know how to cook, sorry to disappoint you.

But I am impressed by your use of punctuation.

I aim to please

you awake

I am. You good?

just can’t sleep

That happen a lot

less recently, but yeah

Tell me something, Javi

what you wanna hear

Anything.

I look forward to our texts all day

You need a hobby.

maybe, but my statement still stands

I do too. Don’t think I’d even reply to anyone else who woke me up at 1 am.

shit hermosa I didn’t mean to wake you

I don’t mind.

go to sleep, we can talk tomorrow

No it’s okay, I want to talk to you.

You ever seen Charmed?

no whats that

Oh, Javi buckle your seatbelt.

What do you even meaaan

I’ve never had it

If we ever meet in person and I have a kitchen available, I’m making it you.

yeah?

Yes. I know you were in Colombia, but you’re missing out.

you wanna meet me in person

I mean, I do love second-guessing myself about if you are who you say you are.

hilarious

Of course, I do.

Do you wanna meet me?

more so now I’m gonna be be cooked for

Now who’s being hilarious.

Each bead of sweat which clusters at his waist, is rewarded with a gentle breeze. It sits, spreading patterns up his tee as it clings to his skin.

The warm, dry heat offers some relief, dancing amongst the tall grass. It rustles through the trees as he sticks the spade back into the soil, wiping his brow, allowing the yellow of his aviators to slide down the bridge of his nose—causing a contrast of lemon and natural lighting to flare across his gaze.

Javi’s been at it for hours. Having set himself up before the sun really began spreading its fingers across Laredo.

Digging, shifting wooden posts into the newly created hole, before he’s filled it back up again. With each one he completes, he takes a second to pause. To lose himself to the whims of his mind—thoughts usually stuck on how much longer it’ll take, and now perpetually on you.

What you’re doing.

If you’re having a good day.

He finds himself so lost in thoughts of you, that it doesn’t feel anything like what it has with others. Not close to drowning, but instead swimming. Moving with a current of his own making, drifting, feeling something other than mundane and boredom in his bones.

He's also noticed how the texts and conversation are no longer strained and frayed—that he isn’t picking apart intention like he once was. That he gets you, reads you. Can almost hear your voice in the way you text him.

Before, he'd never have described his evenings as empty, but now he's busy—occupied. Doing something more than simply passing the time, actually looking forward to the time between the sun going down and the stars lighting the sky.

It's on the second stab into the ground that it hits him: he'd miss you if you stopped texting.

Having grown used to you—enjoys tuning into the evenings spent with you.

He was never lonely in Colombia. A thought which has riddled him in the years since he’s been back. The goal—the job—kept him busy when his conquests couldn’t. How he had been focused on the many, the plans and the takedowns occupying all space that would allow for such things.

But this is different. A different kind of busy—a nicer one. One he craves more than he should.

“There were fresh flowers at your mamá's grave again.”

Javi slams his foot on the shovel, forcing it down further, splitting the soil—letting it cut into the grass, the roots. Turning it up, choosing then to only lift his head to meet the stare waiting for him at the last second.

Last month, he’d been able to shove it off.

He'd been able to blame the suspicions on anything but him. Javi realises how much harder that is going to be now—especially with the way his pop is leaning. How he begins tilting his hat up so he can see him clearer—just like when he was a boy.

Pushing his shades up, Javi chews his cheek, standing straighter and straighter until he fills his lungs with air. Not speaking, choosing silence.

Kicking the dirt, his pop hooks his thumbs in the loops of his jeans. “Same flowers as before.”

“Hmm, nice.”

It’s all he can muster.

All he wants to, as well—desperate to continue digging. And, do so in silence.

“I know it’s you, Jav. You don’t... Y'don't need to be secretive about seeing her.”

“I’m not.”

Even if he is.

Has been.

It hadn't been intentional to go see her. It had begun absently, without real cause or reason.

When he first came back, there was a cause, a reason. A birthday, the holidays—times when his laid-down bouquet wasn’t alone. Guilt biting at him for all the times he didn't visit when he was away, and the times he put off in the months he was back.

Then, one day he turned down a road, and he found himself there, and so it began. Now the guilt has wilted, like the flowers he often replaces. Doing this thing he does when he heads into town.

And, it just so happens he’s been in town more often as of late. The phone—the one heavy in his back pocket—being the cause. His mouth purchasing more credit while his eyes admired the store's beautiful arrangements—ones adorned with the same flowers he’d grown up with in the centre of the dining table.

“You’ve been smiling more, too.”

“Pops, c’mon.”

He laughs—his dad laughs. “It’s nice, hijo. Nice seeing it. Hearing it. She work in town?”

Shaking his head, running a hand across his forehead, he mumbles a no. Pebbled sweat collected on his fingers, closing his eyes, willing the conversation to die before it got going.

It never works, not with his pops.

“Tell me about—“

“Papá, para.”

“—you can try and hide it, sat in the other room from me. But whoever she is, I like her.”

Smirking, he snorts, dropping his hand from his face. “You don’t know her. Fu—I don’t even know her, alright?”

Shrugging, his pop stands from his lean, hand on one of the posts Javi had put up earlier. Wiggling it, testing it, brow raised in a way that screamed he was impressed.

“That’s what time is for, Jav. Getting to know someone.”

“Alright, Pop. Can I…? Please?”

Waving him off, he tips his hat at him. Shooting him another smirk, a knowing one—another Peña trademark.

Aish asked about you today.

what did you tell her

That you’re very good at crosswords.

you’re a tease.

I aim to please.

my pops knows I’m talking to you

Told him all about me, have you? I feel special.

you should feel special

but not just because of that

You’re flirting again.

I am

Charmer.

do you dislike it? me flirting

No. Not really. I like it.

that's good to know

Why?

means i can do it properly now

Is that so? Do I need to brace myself for Javi-flirting?

i would if i were you

an: yesssss, now let the menace texts begin.

next chapter ->

747 notes · View notes

katherines-imagines · 8 months

Text

Still Into You

pairings: hazel callahan x reader

warnings: obliviousness, literally so oblivious that its frustrating, bad writing

key: *** - time skip, faux - fake

summary: The Fight Club has been trying to get Hazel and Y/N forever, so when Y/N has a concert with her band, the Fight Club tries to bring the two together..

For as long as the fight club could remember, Hazel and Y/N had been hopelessly in love with each other, but the two were clearly, completely oblivious. Really, it stressed everyone out. No matter what they tried, the two idiots could not get together. They had tried everything. They planted fake love letters, they set up real love letters, they arranged blind dates with each other, they even tried locking them in a room (subtly of course), but nothing seemed to work.

“Nothing is working,” PJ complained to the group. They were having a secret meeting without Hazel and Y/N. “This has gone on for far too long,” PJ said, the group nodding in agreement. “I mean, at least Y/N tries. Hazel’s the problem.”

“No, remember when Hazel got Y/N coffee,” Brittany pointed out.

“She got all of us coffee.”

“Oh,” Brittany said dejectedly.

“Yeah, she was only going to get it for Y/N, but she chickened out last minute,” Josie recalled. The group collectively face palmed. “Ok guys, we have to come up with something.” As the group sat in silence trying to come up with a new plan, a loud gasp came from Stella-Rebecca.

“Oh my gosh I totally forgot, Y/N has a band concert and she invited all of us!” The girls started chattering excited as Stella-Rebecca started passing out the tickets before Annie clapped her hands.

“That’s it,” she exclaimed. The group turned to her in confusion. “This is how we get them together! We get Y/N to sing a song to confess her feelings, and we help Hazel know that she’s singing it for her. It’s perfect!” Unconsciously, the group mentally simultaneously agreed that Annie was the smartest of the group.

“Great idea,” Isabel gushed. “So how are we gonna do this?” The girls huddled around Annie, ready to here the game plan.

“Ok, so here’s what we’re gonna do..”

***

“Hey are you good over there,” the lead singer asked. Y/N nodded, nervously tapping her guitar. The fight club had told her to sing a love song, and look directly at Hazel to confess. In all honesty, Y/N would do anything just for Hazel to finally realize her feelings. This was the last resort, so she would give it her all.

“Ready guys? We’re on in five,” the drummer notified the group. Nodding, they got in position. Taking a deep breath, Y/N reassured herself that she could do it.

While Y/N was getting ready, the fight club found their seats, putting Hazel directly where Y/N would be able to view her easily and vice versa.

“So Hazel, you ready to see your girlfriend,” Sylvie teased. Blushing, Hazel shook her head in denial.

“She’s not my girlfriend,” Hazel said with a faux scowl. I wish, Hazel thought to herself.

“With how she talks about you, I’m honestly surprised,” Annie enticed. Annie was sure that if Hazel had puppy ears, they would be perked right now. Hook, line, and sinker.

“How does she talk about me,” Hazel asked curiously, trying to play it off smoothly. The group subtly gave each other knowing glances before Annie answered the oblivious girl.

“She always says, ‘Hazel’s so pretty’, ‘Hazel’s so organized’, ‘she’s so cool when she fights’. Seems like she really likes you.” Blushing, Hazel looked off into the distance. Maybe Y/N did like her as more than a friend? No, of course not, she think’s of Hazel as ‘just a friend’. a/n: fucking adrien agreste vibes

“I think Y/N told me that she would be singing the last song specifically for you, Hazel,” Isabel said slyly. Head snapping towards Isabel, she bombarded the poor girl with questions.

“Really? For me? You’re not joking?” Isabel blinked before answering.

“Yes, yes, and no,” Isabel smiled. A huge smile settled on Hazel’s face before the light’s dimmed. The group focused their attention to the stage, where their friend stood on stage. As the audience applauded loudly at the band’s entrance, Hazel clapped the loudest.

The band made their way through the songs, until finally they were at the last one.

“Before we finish up with our last song,” Y/N said with a bright smile. “I wanna dedicate this last one to someone I’ve been trying to tell them, but they’re just a little bit oblivious.” With a nervous smile, Y/N stared directly at Hazel, and motioned for the band to start. The main singer took a step back for Y/N to sing. They started playing and Hazel could recognize the song, ‘Still Into You’, by Paramore. Oh my god, Hazel thought. This was their song. The song playing when they met. The song playing when both girls fell for each other. Theirs. As Y/N sang, her gaze never left Hazel’s.

“Even after all this time,” Y/N sang, looking at Hazel. “I’m into you. Baby, not a day goes by, that I’m not into you!” As they finished the song, a huge applause came out, Hazel’s mouth dropped. ‘I love you Haze’, Y/N mouthed. Hazel could feel her heart beating hard in her chest and she finally mouthed the words back.

‘I love you too’.

A/N: @deadgirlwalkingtaylorsversion wrote a post asking about the reader confessing unconsciously during a concert, but I tried putting my own little twist to it (hope that’s ok). I’m taking requests if y’all have any! Hope you all liked it!

#hazel callahan x you #hazel callahan #hazel callahan imagine #hazel callahan x reader #hazel callahan imagines #bottoms movie #bottoms x reader

300 notes · View notes

mysticmellowlove · 5 months

Note

Thinking about a really tall (like 6’3-6’4) yandere who is like slender muscle and who gives off “Look at us the wrong way and I’ll snap your neck” vibes but in reality he is just a little thing for us. A big little thing. Like, he can lift almost anything and do anything but he just wants us to caress him and tell him what a pretty boy he is and how we love him. Sitting on his lap caressing his pretty face saying we’ll be together for eternity. He wants to be manhandled at the same time, spank him, tell him his mommy owns him and peg him. Use his thick long pretty pink cock however you please but just please touch and love him. Take him on walks and pet him and he should be ok.

note; the Aussie in me really comes out whenever i write mommy kink because i can't for the life of me type 'mummy' and not cringe, it's gotta be the American spelling lol

warnings; sub male, yandere male, reader is called mommy, no gender tho, mommy kink, small pet play,

The smell of freshly brewed coffee swarmed your senses as you took another sip from the cappuccino in front of you. At your side was your boyfriend of three months. The relationship was pretty new yet you had a feeling that he didn't share the same sentiment.

Ever since you had first gotten with him he was always a little too close, a little too clingy, a little too knowledgeable. You took it in stride though and made sure to enjoy the strangely attentive man.

"Hey, you're with Build Co?" Your head turned casually as you zoned back into the real world. Standing there was an older man accompanied by what looked to be the standard younger and way more attractive assistant.

"Sure am, shall we start?" You smiled at the two as you slowly pet the thigh of your boyfriend.

"You did so good today, I'm proud of you." You cooed as you languidly stroked his cock. The ministrations were repetitive, up and down like a pendulum. He sat with his legs draped over your lap, his hands holding him up as he pressed them into the bedsheets.

He was like a big puppy, sometimes he was naughty and like today sometimes he was good. You knew that taking him to one of your appointments would be a little shaky, there was something about other people that seemed to set him off. However, he didn't even glare at the gentleman you were designing a house for!

He deserved something good for his efforts.

"T-thank you mommy." He stuttered as he fought to keep his hips still, not wanting to take away his prize by being greedy. You knew all he wanted to do was thrust upwards into your hand, it seemed as if today he just wanted to be on his best behaviour. You cooed as you continued to jerk him, your other hand going to pinch at his sensitive nipples.

He stood tall and strong, muscular and intimidating and yet he had the most sensitive body. Flick his nipples and he was keening, brush over his underwear and he had tears in his eyes. Such a needy boy and yet it was only for you. That rush of dominance was like nothing else, that high of knowing he would only bend over for you. And bend over he did, he tried to tempt you all the time after all.

But now he was being a good boy and good boys deserve rewards. He already had his collar around his neck, the leather slightly biting into his skin just how he liked it and you knew that the butt plug inside him was pressing deliciously into his prostrate as he sat on his ass with his cock before you.

"Please, can I be inside you?" He whispered, his eyes directed down at his weeping cock instead of your eyes. So shy and pliant, always wanting what's best for you. A hum left your mouth as you pretended to think about it for a moment.

"Why not? You've been so good to me haven't you, it would be cruel to leave my little puppy high and dry right?" A snide grin rose to your lips as his eyes lit up, a light sheen of sweat made his skin glisten.

"Come on then, make sure to fuck me good puppy." You grinned as you gave his dick one more tug before shuffling his legs off of you. After a long day of work getting to spend the night with your overly needy boyfriend was like a dream come true. Even better if he had his cock deep inside you as tears streamed down his face.

"Of course mommy, I promise. Always."

#love for anon #sub male #dom reader #ask #sub yandere #yandere male #gn reader

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starstruckmoony · 1 year

Text

style.

masterlist

pairing - sirius black x fem!reader

summary - you and sirius start dating after accidentally running into each other at a concert but confirm nothing, just to watch everyone lose their shit online.

trope/tags - band/celeb!au, instagram/social media!au, modern!au, fluff, terrible humour

word count - 1k

warnings - language

part 1 / part 2 / part 3

yourusername

❤ liked by starmanblack, cissy_blck, r.a.black and 804,337 others

yourusername mirror's dirty but i felt pretty

7,164 comments

starmanblack damn smash

yourusername thirsty mf

starmanblack you're not wrong

cissy_blck i promise i'm cooler than your boyfriend

luciusssy i love you too bae

cissy_blck 🥰

bartyyy can you sign my house?

yourusername i'll see what i can do

lily_evans UMMMMMM MOTHER?

mmmckinnon mommy.

prongsyboy mama?

starmanblack PRONGS

user128836 i don't know the colour of anything

user702655 YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND????

user358991 sirius said smash and i agree

user073823 the only man we trust

user662627 i'm gonna clown so hard but why did half of sirius family like this post?

user491175 i almost sent a thirst tweet

starmanblack

❤ liked by yourusername, ev.rosier, marymacdonald and 799,853 others

starmanblack boyfriend vibes 😩

6,897 comments

yourusername very real

starmanblack i'm flattered

yourusername you better be

yourusername you still smell like horse tho

starmanblack go away

prongsyboy did you tell him i said hi?

starmanblack i got you his autograph

mmmckinnon you didn't even tag the photographer smh

starmanblack why are you offended in the name of the photographer?

mmmckinnon i'm just defending my wifey

casmeadowes i wasn't there???

user075764 DATE ME

user246766 you single?

user113388 he's dating y/n l/n

user300722 i volunteer to take your bf photos 🤚

user943534 CONFIRM THE RUMOURS I'M BEGGING

user855465 y/n has a boyfriend and you just put boyfriend in the caption so i'll live in delusion from now on

user464646 i wanna be a horse

prongsyboy added to their story

yourusername

❤ liked by starmanblack, pandorasbox, rjlupin and 844,008 others

yourusername london, i'm speechless. i had the most amazing time with all of you last night and i can't wait to perform for you again 💞 hearing you guys sing your hearts out with me was truly magical, thank you sooo much and i love love love every single one of you 💕 also! a special thanks that friend group from the first row who gave me a bunch of plushies, my heart is extra happy 😚

tagged ev.rosier

8,677 comments

starmanblack i was there, i can confirm

yourusername I COULDN'T SEE YOU IN THE CROWD AT FIRST AND I GOT SO SAD

starmanblack lol i love you sm

starmanblack my guitar fits your aesthetic nicely

yourusername i know right?!? me and her were meant to be

marymacdonald when i say best concert of my life i mean it

yourusername i don't deserve you

bartyyy first row seats hmghnhm 😩

yourusername perks of dating the photographer

ev.rosier you're welcome bartemius

user201010 i cried ugly tears

user927161 i formally apologise to the people who were near me 💀

user472738 ARE Y'ALL SEEING THIS??? THEY'RE DEFO DATING

user928312 YOU PLAYED MY FAVOURITE SONG AND I WASN'T THERE 😭😭😭

user446286 one of those plushies was from meeeee

user018381 lost my voice but it feels so right

starmanblack

❤ liked by yourusername, marymacdonald, lily_evans and 810,777 others

starmanblack ok.

7,995 comments

yourusername he loves you

starmanblack he bit my converse

yourusername it was an act of love

starmanblack AND HE STOLE ONE OF MY DOCS

yourusername IT. WAS. AN. ACT. OF. LOVE.

yourusername bet you deserved that

starmanblack you were just saying he loves me?

yourusername was i though?

vance_emm what in the gaslighting hell is going on above me?

r.a.black wdym? i'm loving it

user242539 i've yet to see a normal picture of this little guy

user301453 THE BICKERING LMAOOO

user463646 HELP HE'S VIOLATING YOU

user857433 he's in his reputation era

user302770 THIS DOG PLS

yourusername added to their story

celeb_gossip

♡ 37,022 likes

celeb_gossip a scandal is on its way! 👀 there's been word on the street that sirius black and y/n l/n have had a little something going on since the beginning of the year, and we are almost certain that this isn't just another case of senseless rumours. 🙈 other than constantly interacting with one another on social media, the two have been pictured entering l/n's apartment after what seemed like a romantic night out. 😌 several sources can prove that the couple has been caught in ways that scream everything BUT platonic, and we deem them quite credible. 😉 but in the light of all of this, the two singers haven't said anything. what do you think? 🤔 are they secretly together? 🤭 or are they secretly laughing at all of us? 😶 leave your opinion in the comments! 😘

12,558 comments

user438185 oH

user019570 EVERYBODY STAY CALM

user837999 i hope they sue you lol

user262626 they're defo laughing at us

user823715 THE POWER THESE TWO WOULD HOLD AS A COUPLE

user192072 LMAO THEY'D BREAK THE INTERNET IF THEY CONFIRMED IT

user137753 get a life wtf

user020191 pretty sure they're together

user647275 this is out of line

user244411 nah cause paps should be illegal

user302906 I NEED THEM TO SAY SOMETHING I'M LITERALLY FREAKING OUT

user522727 dunno but i want whatever they have going on

yourusername

❤ liked by bellatrixieb, cissy_blck, r.a.black and 855,006 others

yourusername tea pages are saying that i'm dating this weirdo 🤪

tagged starmanblack

10,675 comments

starmanblack people just love being funny

yourusername making me shed tears

starmanblack you could have found a better picture at least 🙄

yourusername fym? this is top tier stuff

starmanblack you're not getting your shades back

yourusername funny 🤣 i'll steal them back today 😐

vance_emm yeah and i'm a hamster

marymacdonald you kind of look like one though 🥺

mmmckinnon LMAOOOOO

starmanblack not you talking

mmmckinnon lmaoing ≠ talking

user283800 guess this confirms it ☹

user916373 WHY DO REG AND SIRIUS' COUSINS KEEP LIKING ALL YOUR POSTS THIS MAKES ME CONFUSEDDDD

user758234 does this mean you're free to date me?

user424116 YOU'RE TROLLING US

user021725 double meaning? (pls say sike i'm desperate)

user024477 calling sirius up rn

user555641 GUYS THERE'S STILL HOPE MAYBE THEY'RE JOKING AROUND

user828295 okay but does it actually matter 💀

starmanblack

❤ liked by lily_evans, pandorasbox, casmeadowes and 873,253 others

starmanblack feeding the paps

11,994 comments

yourusername bet they're still starving

starmanblack we should make out and post it

yourusername twitter will go CRAZYYY

yourusername we look dead tho

starmanblack i reckon it's the cheap wine

yourusername you calling me poor?

starmanblack 😇

prongsyboy i still don't get how or why you had my glasses

starmanblack aesthetic purposes

xeno_lovegood that's cute 🤩

starmanblack facts ong fr fr

cissy_blck reggie's sil

bellatrixieb i'm so jealous

user472721 I WANT

user882923 I CAN'T DECIDE WHO THE LUCKY ONE IS

user382541 NAUR STOP MESSING WITH US

user773724 WHATTGEDHQUXJQDJJQSJJW

user482972 OH MY GOD?????????

user362613 narcissa's comments making me all hopeful

user924474 I'M SO STRESSED

starmanblack added to their story

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cinnibelle · 24 days

Text

I’m going to vent. Sit tight for an artist’s reflection on the acotar fandom!

I was going to use tumblr to strictly post art (at least on my end) and engage with the wonderful ppl here as well. Except what I’ve been seeing as of late is a lot of abuse (across platforms) and it’s very jarring. As an artist, I understand to make the most of your experience in a toxic fandom is to say nothing and do nothing that bothers those a bit **too** passionate about their opinions. I get it, I’m used to being content fodder from other fandoms. So I am not new to this.

But this fandom is *so* toxic that I immediately understood why artists choose to stay neutral or entirely avoid making art for this fandom at all. I have several art friends interested in the books but won’t touch the fandom with a ten foot pole from what they’ve seen. What I’ve personally witnessed the past few months is genuinely disgusting. The only reason I’m here after being FLAMED on twitter is because 1) I began posting BECAUSE people were so kind and encouraging and I don’t want to leave them and the possibility of befriending others 2) I was fully prepared to be dragged for the smallest offense.

I didn’t want to believe people would be downright atrocious to me for Elain, being starborn, holding the sword that reflects her (as I’ve stated when I paralleled quotes) but that’s what they were: awful. And what I got in turn was: why are you victimizing yourself this is what other artists deal with! Ok?? And!? Why is it appropriate AT ALL. Why is it fine for you to do that? I don’t care what anyone ships, why do you feel entitled to comment nastiness under someone’s art. To directly be in their mentions mocking the concept and the way it looks or how you hate the character. It brings me and others joy.. why are you being ruthless? For a fictional character??

It’s too much. And you know, this is my first fandom experience where the shipping is so extreme. I would’ve loved multi shipping as I’ve done it in other fandoms, I really don’t care for what sort of crack ships people make up (though I have my limitations, I think everyone does. “Notp”.) But you know what I DON’T DO as an adult? Ridicule artists for their work. They are providing content FOR FREE. And if they aren’t, they are gifting you with their expertise and talent. You are scaring people away.

I was afraid of joining and just stayed on the sidelines for months just enjoying arts in peace. I only gave in because I showed some friends some of my sketches and they ADORED it. And pleaded that I post. So I did, and I found many others really wanted me to continue posting. So I do. Were it not for the toxicity, I would’ve drawn all types of ships because I’m genuinely someone that does not care about the ship and if it’s canon or endgame or not, if I like the characters and the vibe- cool. Draw it. That’s the beauty of fanart.

But people are acting diabolically UNHINGED over it. And treating artists like they’re players and they’re revoking sponsorships. Fandom should not be a competition. That is exhaustive and tiring. I shouldn’t have to be fearful of the engagements on my posts. I don’t even have 500 followers yet on ANY of my platforms. And still, I am treated like filth. I need people to reflect on their behavior, recognize if they don’t like something ignore it or block it or what have you and be at peace. Stop giving into negativity and using artists as some pawn- they have feelings TOO! And you really turn them off to a character or a ship or a fandom in general with the way you act.

I have my comments off where I can keep them off because I simply don’t want 1) people arguing in my comments and 2) comments that are generally unhelpful or just shaming me for what I post. But twitter I really can’t help what happens. And tumblr too there’s some limits I can take and a filtering system I can take advantage of but even here people lack etiquette. I don’t understand where people get off acting like mean girls over things people made.

This is the most extreme, unhealthy fandom I have ever been in and I’m really not all shocked when I hear an artist quit and doesn’t want to partake. This is not a competition of who has it worse. Stop bullying artists because they don’t make content that pleases you. Just drop it. I can’t believe I am being called TOXIC for defending myself and my art. And I know who these people are, I know exactly the type of content they themselves post and it’s COMEDY to be telling ME I’m toxic for standing up for myself.

Most artists leave or go silent. That’s what you want, right? Or to antagonize them to the point they really lose patience with you. This is me losing patience: a call to being better. Be the change you seek. It’s funny I have people going at me and in their bio it says “ spread kindness not hate” Pardon??

Seriously, I would’ve liked to explore any theory and a variety of arts despite my preferences but the way people act with what I DO put out, I’m just sour. I don’t even want to expand beyond the two characters I really like because I have a headache already with the “you don’t really care about-“ takes that I’ve seen other artists get when they expand what they draw in this fandom.

It shouldn’t offend you that an artist has a preference and wants to share the things that they found intriguing or makes them happy. And if it does, cry about it in private at minimum. Stop dumping your grief onto the artists. That’s all. Maybe then you will see a resurgence of artists that do content for free (and frequently) or a return of artists who left.

#sorry I’m just shaken and tired #acotar #small artist #bookish

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aspd-culture · 1 month

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Welcome back. You’re very informative.

I’m very confused about how numerous people, from you, to other antisocial people speaking from their experiences (some of which I learned are actually friends) to prosocial researchers of ASPD say that antisocial people see relationships as transactional. It’s not weird that you guys see it that way, it’s more like “and prosocials… don’t???” Because I’m certain I’m prosocial. I’m neurodivergent, sure, but no signs of ASPD. So, how do most prosocial people typically view relationships if they’re not transactional?

So I find prosocials and pwASPD both tend to think “but doesn’t everybody” when we hear this - it’s a super undescriptive term - but we’re thinking different things define something as transactional. We also see the reason for that transaction to be different.

From a prosocial generally, they’ll mean “I only want to be around people that ‘don’t drain my energy’, that don’t just take take take, that we mutually enjoy the friendship/relationship and want to be around each other”. That’s kinda their definition of getting something out of it, and they want everyone to get something out of it. If they’re draining you, they want you to be free of it so you can be happy, and the transactions involved can be purely emotional/vibes. The reason they feel this way is a desire for positive and enjoyable social connection; the consequence for an uneven/bad/missing transaction is discomfort and wasting their time in negative experiences and generally feeling bad in association with that person.

PwASPD see those transactions very very literally. There’s no vibes nor emotions in the transactions, those are either a reaction to the transaction or a bonus. We mean that we are getting something tangible or practical out of it. Rides, help with things we can’t or don’t want to do alone, sex, maybe even the social relief from the annoyance of “why don’t you ever talk to anyone?” coming from all sides. We also don’t always care if it’s even on the other person’s end. If they’re ok driving me everywhere/if they do it and don’t say or show they’re uncomfortable, then I will assume they are fine with that piece of the transaction. If I’m taking more than I’m giving and they seem chill with that then I’ll accept it. However, I won’t give them *nothing* and that’s because of our reason for transactions - it’s dangerous otherwise. First off, I have shit I need I can’t get myself as much as it sucks, so I need to be around people. But if we need something from them, what we learned in our childhoods is that we don’t get that for free. There’s always something over your head. A lot of pwASPD had friends or caregivers that would hold favors or even *basic, legally-mandated caregiving* over our heads as though we didn’t deserve it. Often our value was determined as a child by what we provided, and since children can’t provide much, we were worthless and not deserving of good treatment.

This is part of the reason (TW non-descriptive CSA mention, skip to the next paragraph if you want) that people thought ASPD was directly correlated with CSA for a long time - many cases of long term CSA come from either “I’ll give you x/do x for you if you help me with this” or worse, doing something first then saying “but I gave you X!/did X for you! I wouldn’t have if I knew you’d act like this”, often call us selfish if we tried to say no and maybe get aggressive or forceful after, and that is an easy lead-in to our view of interactions.

So a lot of us see it that if we want to be safe/know we can continue to get what we need, we HAVE to be giving them something. If you claim you like being around me “just to be around me” or worse that you’re willing to do something for me “just because I want to”, that’s not safe. You want something from me and I’ll give it to you - just tell me what it is. If you’re not telling me, that means it’s not good or you’re just gonna decide later that I’m selfish. You might hurt me to get what you want and justify it with this. Take something from my side so we’re even, because even means safe. Even means I get access to what I need and you get access to what you need - so now we’re both using this relationship/friendship/etc for something and you wouldn’t wanna mess that up by putting me in danger any more than I’d want to mess it up by putting you in danger.

Of course, not every prosocial sees it the first way and not every pwASPD had those experiences and/or sees it that way. But that’s what I’ve found to be common. If you see “they make me happy” as what your or their end of the transaction is, it’s definitely a prosocial response, maybe with the exception of thinking of it as “getting their brain to dopamine/oxytocin” vs caring how they’re actually feeling. If not, if you need it to be practical, that’s definitely transactional.

It’s important to note this is personal relationships with no practical consequences to ending the relationship - most people see relationships (platonic) with coworkers or managers as transactional and that’s a way I usually explain it to prosocials (“do you deal with your boss bc you like them or bc they sign your check - and would your boss keep you hired if you didn’t do your job because you make them happy just by being there?”). But with a romantic or sexual partner, a friend, etc. this is not a typical view of relationships.

That said - you can *absolutely* not have ASPD and have transactional view of relationships. It’s not a 1:1 thing there; not everyone with ASPD has it and not every prosocial doesn’t. It’s just a really common piece of the puzzle that is this personality disorder.

Edit: ack I’m so sorry I forgot to add the csa tw tags they’re there now.

Plain text below the cut:

Edit: ack I’m so sorry I forgot to add the csa tw tags they’re there now.

#tw mentions of sex #tw csa #tw csa mention #tw abuse mention #tw sa #tw sa mention #tw child abuse mention #tw child abuse #aspd-culture-is #aspd culture is #aspd culture #actually aspd #aspd #aspd awareness #actually antisocial #antisocial personality disorder #aspd traits #anons welcome

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inkdemonapologist · 3 months

Text

nobody asked but since I've seen a lil chatter on the DCTL Graphic Novel on tumblr too, here's the thread I posted on twitter, speaking as someone who's done a little freelance work as a comic artist, under the jump:

Main thought about the DCTL graphic novel preview is: yeah, I've made designs like that when I was being paid by the page and expected to just throw in extra design work for free and I have a deadline and no time to scour the source material or really put my heart into the design No shade to the artist; every complaint I have about the pages we've seen is that this looks like someone who was just working (quickly) from a script. The artist is likely not a Big Fan, so they only know the info and descriptions they're given. And the artist's portfolio shows they're capable of the kind of designs and dynamics this comic needed. its possible they phoned it in for no reason, but feels more likely to be "not enough time/not paid enough/not given enough info to give it that level of care." Which, don't get me wrong; an important level of craftsmanship and care is missing and im not gonna blame the artist but i AM gonna be a hater abt it lmao It's not just about designs; the convo with Joey is another good example. It's a literal illustration of the things Joey said and did in that scene, but it's missing the point -- that scene is our introduction to the way Joey throws Buddy off-balance. That energy is missing. And that's the sort of thing that needs the script to convey this purpose well to the artist, that needs the artist to have time & freedom to invest in portraying it, that needs time & investment & knowledge to ask for adjustments at early stages and get the page right one more note: begging batim fans 2 think abt the plot of DCTL and realise why "maybe we will not make the creepy guy who dies at the end a black man in this" is perhaps a reasonable choice. like im a fan of poc norman headcanons too but pls recognise this would be a tough call!! anyway, genuinely cannot wait to see how off sammy is gonna be in this lmao. will he be a mid non-design like norman or will he be conventionally handsome or will he get graphic novel dave miller vibes b/c hes an antagonist? will we get the fabled black hair sammy??? i cant wait

TL;DR I strongly suspect this was an issue of not enough time/not enough money. That design looks nothing like the description of Norman, right? Like, there's hundreds of different AU designs of all shapes, colours and sizes that you could create that would still look like Norman Polk, but somehow they managed to make a character that isnt ANY of them, lmao??? So... how could that happen, unless nobody gave the artist a description of Norman? Or if they did, how did that design make it past anyone else, unless there wasn't time for revisions or a system worked out for revisions, unless whoever was managing the comic project thought it was fine if the designs didn't fit with the descriptions in the book? If everyone is doing their job, then the artist is given the information they need without having to go do unpaid YA novel research before they can start drawing. That's why you have a writer adapting it!!

("they should hire fans, a fan would've done a better job" OK BUT THATS B/C FANS ARE MORE LIKELY TO ALLOW THEMSELVES TO BE EXPLOITED AND DO EXTRA UNPAID WORK B/C THEY CARE!! THATS NOT A SOLUTION!!!! THATS A JOEY DREW STRAT!!!!!!!)

Anyway I could yell about this for 15 years so I'm going to shush for now BUT I JUST FEEL VERY STRONGLY ABOUT IT LMAO.

#genuinely tho now that i dont have to worry abt the possibility that it might be good #i can just relax and be excited to discover how far off it will be #im a hater abt this but everyone be nice to the artist lmao #bendy saltposting #we all write on the walls #is abby going to be in a suit like she's supposed to be?#how accurate will dot be?#will jacob even be black?#we could do a whole DCTL Comic Discrepancy Bingo i think it would be fun #HOW CLOSE TO GINGER ROGERS IS ALLISON GOING TO LOOK

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moni-logues · 7 months

Text

Kintsugi 12

Pairing: Yoongi x reader

Genre: strangers-to-friends-to-lovers, non-idol!au, angst, smut, tiny bit of eventual fluff

Summary: In a fit of spiteful, post-break-up self-improvement, you sign up to a baking class. Yoongi, in a bid to appease his demanding girlfriend, signs up, too. Determined to make him your friend, you end up with more than you ever imagined.

Word count: 3.2k

Content: little bit of throwing up (alcohol induced)

A/N: thanks to @quarter-life-crisis2 for beta-ing the first part of this! This is now the second time I'm posting this so i have nothing more to say lmao

Chapter Eleven | Masterlist | Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Twelve – Peaches pt.2

You stood outside Yoongi’s front door, pie held carefully in your hands, breathing deeply, taking a moment to try to soothe your nerves. It was outrageous, you thought, that you could be this nervous. It was Yoongi. On the other hand, it was Yoongi. It was not every day that you confessed to harbouring romantic feelings for one of your best friends. It was not every day that you ripped yourself open and placed your fluttering heart before them, hoping, praying that they felt the same.

It was not every day, but it was today.

You squared your shoulders, shuffled the pie so it rested on the palm of one hand, and used the other to key in the entry code.

“I’m here!” you called as you strode in and shut the door behind you.

You could hear and smell cooking from the kitchen, music on low in the background. You kicked off your shoes and took a deep breath. You had run over a hundred different scenarios, a hundred different scenes; sometimes you just kissed him; sometimes you prepared a long, thoughtful speech; sometimes you played it casual; sometimes you told him you loved him; sometimes, even in your thoughts, you chickened out entirely; sometimes he rejected you and sometimes he didn’t. You always cried.

You were still standing in the hallway, staring up at the invisible obstacle in front of you when Yoongi approached, spatula in hand, frown on his face. You tried hard not to notice how cute he was with his apron on, how domestic. You tried to stop your mind flying forward to a future where he cooked all your dinners, or you cooked them together, in the house you shared. You needed to keep a level head.

“Oh,” he said when he saw you. “I thought I heard you come in but then you didn’t appear. Why are you just standing there?”

Good question.

You chuckled awkwardly and walked into the apartment fully, straight to the kitchen where you set down your pie on the counter.

“What’s in it?” Yoongi asked.

“It’s peach and nectarine,” you answered, wondering if he would remember, if he might understand its significance.

“It’s what?”

“Peach and nectarine.”

He looked at you with his eyebrows raised, expectant.

“It’s what?”

You groaned and rolled your eyes; your heart sang. You gave him a huge, dramatic sigh.

“It’s peachtarine pie.”

“Damn fucking straight.”

He was in a good mood. You liked that. That had to bode well, right?

“Do you want a drink?”

Yes, you were offering him his own alcohol in his own house, but you felt like you needed it. You should have had one before you came out but time hadn’t allowed.

“Sure, there’s wine in the fridge.”

Not the sort of drink you had in mind. You checked in his fridge for soju and, finding none, walked around to his drinks cabinet where you deliberated between tequila and vodka, eventually plumping for vodka. Tequila gave party vibes which wasn’t exactly what you were going for. You returned to the kitchen and poured two shots.

“Here.”

You nudged Yoongi – who had turned back to the stove – and handed him the drink.

“Wow, really? Are we celebrating or commiserating something?”

He knocked back the shot anyway and you did the same, cursing Yoongi in your head for not keeping soju – or anything more palatable – in the house.

“Nope. Just because.”

“Ok, party girl.”

He waved the glass out towards you, asking for another, which you gratefully gave, taking one more for yourself, too. That was a little more like it. You felt looser already. A little Dutch courage can go a long way.

“What are you cooking for me?”

You moved from the other side of the counter and stood next to him, peering into the two dolsots bubbling away.

“Haemul sundubu.”

“Yum, thanks.”

“It’s almost done; there’s banchan in the fridge. And the wine I said I actually wanted to drink.”

He grinned down at you and you hip-checked him, moving away to set the table and pour more drinks.

You hadn’t decided when you were going to tell him. You had told yourself that you would show up and you’d just know when was the right moment; you knew now that that was bullshit and you should have come more prepared. The fear of spoiling everything was rapidly creeping up on you; Yoongi was in a good mood and you were having so much fun. You knew the second you opened your mouth to tell him, everything would change. Even if it was what you wanted, what you were hoping for, even if he said everything you most wanted to hear, it would change things. It was the last night of your friendship, for better or for worse. You felt desperately like you had to make the most of the evening, make the most of everything you had right now: the ease, the comfort, the little sparks of something more when he laughed at your jokes, when he smiled at you, when you got to touch him even a little. There would be no going back. So you delayed your jump into the unknown a little longer and it settled your nerves. It put off the moment and you could relax, at least for an hour or two.

The addition of a film after dinner had continued; it was supposed to be your night to pick but you couldn’t focus on making a decision so Yoongi picked one for you. You didn’t care. You weren’t even sure what it was, even though it had been on in front of you for the last hour and a half. You couldn’t have explained the plot if you’d been offered a lottery jackpot for it.

You had your legs thrown over Yoongi, leaning towards him, sitting as you did every time now. He was slouching deep into the corner, his feet on the coffee table, picking idly at the threads of the holes in your jeans as he watched; your heart skipped every time his fingertips brushed the bare skin beneath.

You could almost hear a clock tick as time went by, you still not having said a thing. It was coming. You knew it was coming. You knew you had to say something; you had steeled yourself for this. You had promised yourself you would do it. You had promised everyone: Taehyung, Nina, San. You had made Taehyung go to your apartment and wait on standby, so he could be there with no delay if it was a ‘no’. You had to do this. You were going to do this. And it had to be now.

You reached out and put your hands on his, toying with his fingers. His immediately stilled and there was a twitch that told you he was going to pull them back, out of reach, but you held on. You kept his little finger in your hands, mindlessly fidgeting with it, finding yourself unable to look up at him.

“Yoongi?”

Your face was already hot, your heart already racing. He grunted inquisitively and you felt his eyes move to you.

“Can I ask you something?”

You were still looking at his hands, your stomach doing somersaults; you wished you hadn’t indulged in so much stew now that it was threatening to come back up the way it went down.

“Are you ok?”

You nodded, your throat feeling choked already.

“I, um... Do you ever... think about me?”

You risked a glance up at him; he seemed surprised by your question and then confused. He leant forward, feet on the ground, taking his hand from yours to reach for the control and stop the film. Then he sat back, not slouching this time, and looked down at you again. You focused on your hands.

“I mean,” you continued, before he could answer, “I mean that-… I- sometimes, just recently, I... I think, I have feelings for you.”

Your face burnt so hot, it brought tears to your eyes. You didn’t know what to say next; usually your mouth did all the talking for you but it had dried up. And Yoongi wasn’t saying anything. You tried to speak and nothing but a croak came out so you cleared your throat and gave it another shot. This was not how you had imagined it going; it was supposed to be smoother than this, more confident. You hadn’t expected to be this meek; you weren’t meek. But the weight of this exchange was crushing.

“I just mean that... Recently, I’ve felt... different... and I- I guess I just wondered if maybe you ever felt like... that. About me.”

It took all you had to look up at him, to try to gauge his reaction, see if you could divine what he was thinking through his face. It was closed, impassive, inscrutable in a way that reminded you of when you first met—his silence in that third class, which you had put down to his ex, but he had never actually explained. You felt the same way as you had back then. You were sticky with nervous sweat, hot and flustered. Embarrassed and self-conscious and burning like you’d been skinned alive. The anxiety was rising in you, a panic that said it was going to go sideways, that this wasn’t how it was supposed to be. That something had already gone wrong. You tried to talk yourself out of it but the longer he stayed quiet, the harder it became.

“Yoongi?” you whispered, the sound barely making it out of your throat, when the seconds felt stretched to minutes.

He wasn’t looking at you; he was staring straight ahead until he gave you a millisecond’s glance and shook his head. You waited, again, for him to say something else, to say anything at all. There was nothing giving him away. You knew him better than this; you could read him; you could sense how he felt. But not now. Not now at a moment when you really needed it.

“No?” you asked when he still said no more.

He was looking down now, not at you but somewhere on the floor. There was pink at the tips of his ears; his cheeks just barely rosy. He shook his head again and cleared his throat.

“No,” he confirmed, just as quiet as you were, his voice just as strained.

“Oh.”

Your attempt to mask the gasp you gave when trying to gulp in air was poor but you couldn’t bear the thought of bursting into tears, here and now. They pooled thick in your eyes and blinking them back only sent them scurrying, falling, streaming down your face in a deluge. You opened and closed your mouth, gaping, fish-like, a few times before you found the composure to reply.

“Ok.” Your voice wavered. “That’s fine. Yeah, ok, friends I guess then.”

You weren’t looking directly at him—there was no way you could—but you saw him, from the corner of your eye, nod, two almost invisible dips of his head. You removed your legs from over his, curling them under you, trying to keep your breathing in check. You didn’t know what to do now. You didn’t understand. You thought about what Namjoon had said, the way he had seemed so confident. Didn’t Namjoon know Yoongi? Surely he wouldn’t have encouraged you if he had known Yoongi didn’t feel the same.

There was a tearing in your chest that felt like collapse. It had been quick at least. But it was sharp. You wiped at your wet face, wishing Yoongi would just say something, anything would do. You felt shut out, iced out, pushed out. Rejected. Which was exactly what you were. In an instant, he had moved a thousand miles away as he stayed sitting next to you on the sofa. You had never felt farther from him than you did at that second. It made your stomach sink like a stone in the sea. It made your hands go weak, incapable of holding a hand even if he’d let you. It made your blood burn with shame like the acid rising in your throat.

Of all your hundreds of scenarios, all the practices you’d run in your head, none of them went like this. You always talked about it, sometimes you even argued, but it was never this. This silence, thick like fog, choking like smog, resting over you. You began to feel smothered, suffocated by it. You couldn’t breathe for fear of falling apart; you had to get out.

Yoongi stayed still, looking at the floor, his fingers worrying a loose thread on his trousers. Did he want you to leave? Did he want you to stay? You couldn’t know and were not able to wait to find out.

“I guess,” you said, when you found the ability to speak without sobbing, “I should just go.”

Yoongi turned to you then, his face for a second wearing a look of panic. He opened his mouth as you stood and you waited for him, gave him a few seconds to tell you to stay, or encourage you to leave. He said nothing. So you walked, with heavy feet and a heavier heart, to the door.

Yoongi followed you, his hands tucked into his sleeves, his fingers twisting around one another. You stooped to put on your shoes and it was only when you were leaning on the door handle that he said anything.

“I’m sorry.”

You looked back at him as you stood in his doorway; you blinked away more tears and you could almost have sworn you saw tears in his eyes, too. You didn’t stop longer to make sure. You turned tail and ran.

You had managed to hold in your sobs in the taxi ride back to your apartment; you couldn’t stop the constant leak of tears from your eyes, but you just about kept a lid on the worst of it. Then you flung open your door and fell to the floor, gasping and choking and barely able to breathe.

Taehyung was by your side in a second, scooping you into his arms, stroking your back, pressing kisses into your hair, letting you make his T-shirt wet and snotty, not saying anything, knowing you weren’t listening anyway.

You couldn’t quite believe it. Not because Yoongi hadn’t wanted you, but because you hadn’t anticipated it going like that. Because you didn’t understand. Because you somehow thought that there would be discussion; you could, now, think of things that you wanted to say, things you wanted to talk about; every thought and idea that had eluded you then flooded back now. You thought of the many ways you had broached the topic in your head and wondered why you did it like that. That wasn’t what you had planned. You hadn’t been clear, had you? Or you hadn’t got your point across? Or maybe you did? You just couldn’t tell. You were, entirely, in disarray.

You also had to ask yourself, did it matter? If Yoongi didn’t feel that way about you, did it matter how he told you? Did it matter what he said or didn’t? Did it matter how you said it? He had clearly known what you meant because he had given you his answer. You had the answer you were looking for—you had the answer to your question, even if it wasn’t the one you had been looking for. The rest was irrelevant.

The emergency treatment for your heartbreak was booze and a lot of it. So much, in fact, that you ended the night with your head in the toilet, that seafood stew finally making its burning way back up, Taehyung standing behind you rubbing your back and making sure your hair was out of the way.

He put you to bed, tucked you up nicely and, at your insistence, curled up next to you, where you clung to him like a koala, desperate to not be alone.

Yoongi stood, gasping, at his door, unable to catch his breath. He was familiar enough with panic attacks to know that this wasn’t one, but he nevertheless sank to the floor and began walking himself through it. He focused on the inhale and the exhale, the counting that accompanied each usually uncomplicated step of breathing. He needed to focus on that. Anything so that he didn’t have to focus on what had just happened.

Panic. That was one word for it. Insanity. That might have been another. Stupidity, certainly. He hadn’t expected it, could not have seen it coming even from a mile off. Nothing had seemed different. You were the same as you ever were; things between the two of you were normal.

And then you asked him that.

And he’d wanted to say yes. He was trying to. He wanted to open up to you and respond in kind and see if maybe something, anything, could have happened.

But he couldn’t. The words got stuck in his throat. He couldn’t force them out, couldn’t make himself say it. He could see it all crumbling; as if he had been watching from outside his body, he had seen it. He had seen himself fail, let you down, lie to you.

And he couldn’t explain it. He didn’t understand the gut-wrenching, visceral fear that had gripped him when you spoke, when you looked up at him—timid and shy like he had never seen you before—and asked if he ever thought about you, said that you had feelings for him. Like a pair of icy hands, one on his heart and one around his throat, it took such strong hold of him that he literally felt strangled: couldn’t speak, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t do a thing that might have led him to happiness.

And then you left. In tears. Because of Yoongi. He wouldn’t forgive himself for that. He probably wouldn’t forgive himself for any of it, but his own pain, he could handle. He was used to that. Causing you pain? Before tonight he would have said it was unthinkable. He would never.

But he had. He had lied; he had rejected you; he had let you run out of his apartment with barely a word said.

He had lost you. That was it. He couldn’t see redemption, couldn’t see a way to walk this back. Not a hurt this big. Not a stupid, pointless, embarrassing lie like this was. It was over.

He couldn’t forgive himself for that either.

He stayed on the floor in the hallway until his legs started screaming for him to move, then a little longer. It wasn’t until Cherry came to chase him into bed that he stood up, walking straight through the apartment to his bedroom, not looking anywhere but straight ahead, not daring to glance at the scene of the crime, the scene of his immodest failure, a scene the very thought of which made him feel sick.

He fell onto his bed and stayed there until Sunday.

Chapter Eleven | Masterlist | Chapter Thirteen

Taglist: @chimmisbae, @idkjustlovingbts @miriamxsworld, @tarahardcore, @simp47koreancrackheads, @xyahrinx, @olyd, @diorh0seokie, @thelilbutifulthings, @acquiescence804

#yoongi x reader #bts fanfic #bts x reader #yoongi angst #yoongi fanfic

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kozachenko · 7 months

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I RETURN BEARING DOODLES OF ZE KEIK!

Hello again! :D I felt like drawing Keiki because I had nothing else to do and I also wanted to draw Keiki again because C R E A T E !

{Artists Note}:

So I had some ideas bouncing around for how I wanted to draw Keiki, and the first time I went with a more robotic look that was inspired by BoTW. I also wanted an excuse to try out some stuff with collages, and so I used an 1800s drawing of a skeleton to put this together. I added a face and a head just for fun, but tbh I wasn't 100% happy with it even though I did like how it looked. I might wanna save the BoTW inspired parts for a future Okina design as I think the constellation motiffe some BoTW Sheikah stuff has fits her more (and I have adopted the headcanon that she has prosthetics, I love it so much).

Like ok, context for this is headcanons. So as I mentioned in my post about Eirin, I wanted to play around with the visual idea of gods in Touhou being very much related to what they're gods of.

So at first with Keiki I tried just making her look like a haniwa herself, but I ended up not going with that as I like the idea of her being distinguishable from the Haniwa she creates. So instead, I ended up going with a more cyberpunk aesthetic for her, inspired in part by Cyberpunk Edgerunners (no spoilers plz, I haven't finished it yet). It's also the reason why I did an alternative cyberpunk outfit for her (inspired by a dress I found on Pinterest).

I feel like the hardest things about drawing Keiki are her dress and hair bandanna. In the image above with her normal outfit, I had a lot of struggle with the sleeves, and I couldn't really get her hair bandanna right. In the faces I drew of her I had a slightly easier time, but still, it's hard to get it to look right. However in the alt design I gave her I somehow managed to make it look right??? Don't know what I did there but I actually like how it looks, so I'll keep what I did there in mind for the next time I draw her.

Speaking of her alt design, it was actually a lot of fun for me to do. I imagine that's her more "official" outfit, don't know what she'd where it for but I mainly drew it on her because i had a cool idea ok?

Also, on the day I drew her initial face render, I had watched Serial Experiments Lain and I think those vibes bled into the sketch version. Upon further inspection of the rendered and coloured version it kinda lost that but it's more to try out a different brush for my style.

Also also, I experimented with giving her earrings! Which didn't make it to the final cut, but still wanted to try it out! This also came as a learning experience on what makes Keiki look like Keiki... it's the hair bandanna, every time she doesn't have it, she doesn't look like herself.

To end it off, I think the unhinged Keiki face I drew for her expressions (since everyone I've been drawing recently has kinda all been lookin like varitations of this face -> (o _ o) gonna need to draw more expressions period actually, need practice on that) is now my favourite unhinged Keiki face I've ever drawn LOL. Expect more Keiki sketches in the future because I do love drawing my beloved blue haired blorbo.

#touhou project #art #fanart #touhou fanart #touhou 17 #keiki haniyasushin #doodles #art dump #long post #concept art #alt design

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stargirlie25 · 5 months

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Me through reading all the ACOTAR books.

ACOTAR: Ew Nesta and Elain are so annoying. This is going to be the best series, Feyre is such a baddie! Awww feylin so cute! DAMN LUCIENNN. I know she ends up with Rhysand but im not vibing with him......how can ACOMAF excuse this?

ACOMAF: Ohk feysands kinda cute but i dont think we can justify all that....Oooooo Cassian and azrielllllll! Awww i hope Mor and Azriel gets a book! *Goes to tiktok and finds out mor is gay* damn Azriel.OMG I LOVE NESTA NOWW PERIOD POP OFF SIS MY QUEENNN. Elain is there too. Ooooo Nessian. Elain and Azriel? I mean as long as its not mor! NAHHH GIRL DONT U DARE BLAME LULU BLAME TAMLIN! OMG ELAIN AND LUCIEN???

ACOWAR: Feyre isnt really feyre-ing any more :(.OH HELL NO SCREW IANTHE NO WAY YOU DID THAT TO MY MANSSS!!! MY POOR LULUUU Why feyre lowkey being such a bitach?

Awww Elucien is so tender! LUCIEN AS A MATE AWWEEEE. Damn Nessian making me sqeual. Lucien went away to find the queen from elains vision! OMG. CASSIAN IS SOOO FINEEEE, elriel is lowkey getting boring....Why is she disrespecting tarquin? He has ALL rights to be upset. Ok tamlin in the HL meeting is being pretty annoying and doing nothing but feyre did nothing as well but NESTA ARCHERON THE WOMAN YOU ARE!!!!! WTHHH HELION AND LUCIEN??????? OMG the war!!! NO THE SURIELLL. THE BONE CARVER NOOOO THE WITCH LADY I FORGOT HER NAME BUT NOOOOOO. THE ELAIN. THE FEYRE. THE NESTA. Omg i have no regrets in my life but this.Damn Nessian ur hurting me. NOOO papa arhceron diedddddddddddd. Damn Ok Elain and Nesta king slayers! Oh rhysand died........i know damn well he gonna come back......´´Be happy feyre´´ bawling. Omggg Lucien was besties with papa archeron???? THE ONLY FATHER FIGURE HE HADDDD DAMN WHY ISNT FEYRE TELLING LUCIEN?? Awww lucien and feyre hug! Cass and feyre are cute but i miss the og´s! Ok girl you flying.

ACOFAS: Snoring. YALL ARE CUTE BUT IM BOREDDD AS HELL. Ok literally no one asked for this Mor pov. Wait why did Elain invite lulu if she is uncomfortable around him? Her power? Elriel kinda gave me brother and sister but i guess elain likes him now.....HI EMERIE IVE HEARD ABT YOUUUUU!!! I just want my girl Nesta, feyre u are not feyreing.

ACOSF: I love nesta so much!!!!!!! Cassian is acting like Rhysands frikcing dog. I hate amren soo much. WHY is Elain acting like shes the victim like nesta told you to leave and now you crying?? Girl you are 23 years old! Ok respect azriel has never disrespected my Nesta. Aw nesta gwyn and emeries friendship is the best one yet!!!!!! Azriel is starting to show an actual personality.....With Gwyn? Okay Gwynriel is so cuteee *sees elucien and gwynriel theories* 100% on board with this!!!!! DAMN the Valkyries! I am so excited for all the other girls to tag along! Just imagine a MOB of nesta gwyn and emerie!!! Eris? HELLL YAHHHHHHH VANSERRAS FOR LIFEEEEEE!!!! YOU ARE TELLING ME CASSIAN DID NOT SAY I LOVE YOU ONCE? Of course nesta lost her powers and she obviously lost them for the sake of the main characters that im bored of :(

ACOA (A court of Azriel): You got her a rose flower......because she likes flowers??? Why is this man so insecure about his hands around her? That cant be right......MISTAKE? THANKYOU RHYSAND FOR STOPPING THIS MADNESS! Wow he just wanted to F**k her and thats it? WTH is Gwyn doing here? Ok creepy Azriel is gone and this new azriel is here? Aweee he is actually kinda cutie now and he is laughing? HE SINGS???? OMG SHE SINGS THO! His shadows singing and dancing with her??? Cuteeeeeee, Ok so he gave the necklace to clotho to give to gwyn, thats cute she does in fact deserve something beautiful like that but why Elains? Ig its the though that counts. SPARKED IN HIS CHEST???? THATS ROWAELIN/NESSIAN LANGUAGE!!!! HOW does her picture it proper?? Glowing and secret? Where the hell did he tuck the image bruhhh?

A thing of secret lovely beauty. AHHHHHHHH clotho and the shadows are team Gwynriel for sure! Gwynriel are sooo mates tho and i hate Elriel with every fiber in my being. How did azriel go from mr. creep to mr. melts my heart?

After finishing: Wow everybody on tiktok are elriels. They are so confident elriel is endgame? Hmmmm but none of their points make sense but i cant explain in a comment section! Maybe Gwynriel and Elucien isnt endgame :(

*Downloads tumblr*

Gwynriel and Eluciens on tumblr have their freaking masters degree DAMN

#pro gwynriel #pro elucien #anti elriel #acotar #acomaf #acowar #acofas #acosf #acoa

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