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pedrito-friskito · 1 year

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strawberry wine - joel miller x ofc!liv stone/fem!reader

during - part fifteen

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this is happening.

a/n: ….I got nothing folks, my askbox is open if you wanna yell about it 😇 this is wildly unedited but it’s late so HERE U GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

word count: 6.6k

warnings: MY BLOG IS 18+, MINORS DNI, canon typical violence/injuries/it’s all for the PLOT OKAY

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Since the moment he set foot in Boston, Joel’s been loathe to leave you.

Even when he first arrived, when his head was buried so far up his ass, when he was keeping himself awake at night convincing himself that he didn’t love you anymore, that you couldn’t love him anymore, he still worried. He paced the floor of your apartment until Tess all but forced him to get some sleep.

Those two days you were in lockup, he thought he’d go mad, with the worry. And then when you did come home, dripping blood on the floor and collapsing into Tess’s arms. He had to remove himself from the room, because he knew if he didn’t, he would have fallen at your feet, have held you close and refused to let go.

Now, things are different. He’s yours and you’re his and everything is as right as it can be to Joel, but he worries more. Every run you go on, he wants to go with you. When he doesn’t, all he does is worry. He knows full well you can handle yourself, has seen you in action often enough to know he doesn’t have to put himself between you and the line of fire. But it doesn’t matter how many times he sees you with a gun in your hand, sees you swinging the bat he gave you so many years ago, watches the gears turning in your head when things don’t go exactly as planned.

You’re a badass, and he knows it, but he loves you and he has to protect you. That’s his job. And without Sarah to—

No.

He tries to cut off the train of thought, tries to blink away the memories that threaten to form behind his eyes. Time won’t erase them, and lately, they weave with his dreams, turn them to nightmares. He sees the faces of the people he’s killed, smells the gunpowder in the air. He loses his daughter, over and over again. He loses Tommy, loses Tess.

He loses you. Over and over. Hears your screams, feels the heat of your blood on his hands. He can’t—

“Joel?”

Your voice yanks him out of his head, deposits him back on the broken road he’s standing on. You’re a few feet ahead of him, your brow raised, the bat propped on your shoulder. There’s a smear of dust on your cheek, no doubt from the path you’d taken out of the QZ, squeezing through rubble until you popped out the other side — your least favourite way out, Joel knows. There’s a handgun strapped to your thigh, a knife hanging from your belt. His shirt hangs from your torso, the top buttons undone, the bruise he’d left on your collar the night before visible from where he’s standing, knowing he put it there. Your hair is half-tucked behind your ear, but a strand flutters across your cheek in the breeze.

You’re…beautiful. There’s no other word for it.

“Take a picture, Miller,” you say with a laugh, walking back the few feet separating you. You hook your fingers in the collar of his shirt, pull him forward and lean up on your toes to kiss him at the same time. His hand finds your waist automatically, fingers seeking bare skin, and you’re grinning when you lean back. “It’ll last longer.”

Joel grunts at you, unable to hide his smirk as your fingers twine with his, pulling him forward, boots shuffling across the gravel. “How much time we got?” he asks, falling into step beside you.

You glance at your — functional — watch. “An hour,” you reply, shaking out your wrist, tapping the bat against your boot. “Time to kill.”

“Gonna have to go through the museum,” he tells you, and you nod. You’d scoped things out at the hotel, like always, concern on both your faces when you saw the water that had begun to pool in the sunken lobby. An easily bypassed obstacle, but the decaying city was showing more and more wear, the Infected getting closer to the QZ.

“Fine by me, there’s a place I wanna check out between here and there anyway.”

“A place, huh?”

You shrug, your face noncommittal. “Yup.”

The place turns out to be a jewelry store, tucked between what was once a coffee shop and a dentist’s office. The entire strip has definitely seen better days, and Joel’s instantly wary, reaching for the gun at his waist while you bee-line for the front door, barely hanging onto it’s hinges.

You pay him no mind, using the bat to clear the jagged edges of the broken window, making a clear path into the store. You disappear through the opening and Joel follows, calling after you. “Liv, wait a sec.”

Joel’s sure the place has been well looted, probably nothing of any value left — not that it matters anymore, what good is a diamond ring when you could have a stack of ration cards instead? He can’t even remember the last time he saw a dollar bill out in the open. He still has his wallet, tucked away in one of your drawers in the apartment, still with a twenty in it, his driver’s license, a credit card that expired in 2004. None of it means anything anymore.

“It’s clear, Joel.”

Inside, just as Joel suspected, the place is a disaster. Shards of glass crunch underfoot with every step you both take, display cases turned on their sides, velvet cushions and those creepy hands used to showcase rings scattered across the ground. There’s no light inside, save for the bit of sunlight that creeps through the broken windows, and Joel watches his step, gun still in hand.

You’ve headed straight for the back corner of the store, and it takes Joel a minute to figure out why.

You and Tess have a bet going, of sorts. Every time you go on a run, you try to find the other person something outrageous, always trying to top the last item with something more ridiculous than the last. It started when you brought back this gigantic jar of marbles, then Tess came back with a whoopee cushion. On and on it’s gone, with Tess currently winning, returning from her last run with Tommy with a mostly complete deck of Uno cards.

“Shit,” you grumble, poking through the pile of glass at your feet, pulling the sleeve of your shirt over your palm so you can lift the display case. “It’s all broken. I wanted one of those little glass animal things. Like a turtle or a deer or something?”

“Baby, they bombed the city,” Joel retorts, putting his hand on his hip. “You really think the little glass animals survived?”

You blow out a breath, pouting, and Joel stifles his chuckle. But then your eyes go wide, and you crouch down, bat dragging through the glass as you move, reaching for something in the mess. “A-ha!”

It’s not a turtle. Or a deer. In fact, Joel has no fucking clue what it is, at first glance, until you place it in his palm for further inspection. It’s a fox, no bigger than his index finger, curled up in his hand. And it’s made of crystal, a slight crack up the middle of the tail, but otherwise intact.

“What d’you think?” you ask, laughing as you take it back from him, pulling your bag off your shoulders so you can stow the thing. “Do I win?”

“For now,” Joel says, smirking at the beaming look on your face. “I’m sure Tess’ll show up with a damn giraffe next time.”

You glare at him, zipping your bag shut. “Appreciate the vote of confidence, Miller.”

He offers you his hand, pulls you to your feet, leaning in to give you a quick kiss once you’re upright. “Anytime, baby. You good?”

“Yeah,” you nod, slinging your bag back on and heading back towards the front of the store. “Y’know, I think I might have her beat for a while now.”

Joel only half hears you.

Something’s caught his eye, on the ground. Tucked partially beneath one of the overturned displays, it glints at him, catching the dim light in just the right way. Joel crouches, uses the end of his gun to move the shards of glass away before he reaches for it. Not silver, not gold, but a rosy colour, something he’s not sure he’s seen before. It’s pretty, a flat band, no gems, but flowers engraved into the metal, all the way around. It’s light, in the palm of his hand, has a few scratches but nothing serious.

Instantly, his mind wonders what it might look like on your finger. The thought nearly bowls him over, and he almost stumbles back a step, reaching up and dropping the ring into the pocket of his shirt.

He could ask…couldn’t he? He wants to ask. The feeling bubbles up, crawling up the back of his throat. It’s not the same as it was before, not that anything is. There’s no fanfare or big white dresses — though knowing you and Tess, he’s sure you could find something — or drinking until you forget how sore your feet are from dancing. It’s just a piece of paper, signatures tying your lives together, indefinitely to FEDRA’s eyes. Another note in your file, the first person to be notified should you show up dead somewhere, lucky enough to be recognizable.

But…he wants it.

Fuck, he wants it. With you. For you. You.

“Joel?” you call, your voice laced with concern, and he calls back, jogging towards the front of the store, watching his step as he goes.

“Comin’, baby.”

You meet Gwen in the usual spot. She’s been your go-to for some time now. Her drops are always good, always on time, and you’re always happy to give each other something extra. The first chicken you traded for didn’t last long, and you’d tried to extend the life of the second, but the clucking pissed off the neighbours, and Tess makes a mean chicken casserole.

This time is no different, at the start. There are faces amongst her crew you don’t recognize, a couple younger guys that are clearly just getting their feet wet. The trade is for first aid supplies from Gwen, produce seeds and a few boxes of ammo from you. The pharmacy in Boston has been running low on things for weeks now, with no promise of anything coming anytime soon. Deanna’s been worried as hell, grumbling at you any chance she gets, and you know this’ll help some.

“Who’re the newbies?” you ask, jutting your chin towards the two guys, your bag filled with Gwen’s supplies, zipping it shut once more. They’re young, maybe mid-twenties, and it makes you uneasy to see unsure hands on such a large gun.

“My brother, Trevor,” Gwen offers, and you lift a brow. “And the other, Noah, just arrived in Hartford a few weeks back.”

Joel glances at the men before turning to Gwen. “Not wastin’ any time, huh?”

Gwen’s face goes dark as she look between you and Joel, and it makes your stomach turn. “Hartford’s not what it used to be. I don’t…I don’t know how long it’ll be until we can make another trade, Liv. Things are changing.”

“Meaning?” you ask. From the corner of your eye, you can see Joel’s jaw go tight.

“FEDRA’s making it harder and harder for us to live in peace. Let’s just leave it at that.”

Her tone tells you you’re not getting any more information besides that, so you just nod, thanking her for the supplies. She offers a hand to shake, and you take it, nodding to her. “Stay safe, Gwen.”

“You too, Liv.”

“SHIT!”

Everyone whirls at the same time, watching as Noah goes toppling backwards. You’d met up at one of the intersections near the remaining chain link, same as always. A crater left by the bombs takes up the right half of the road, and Noah falls straight into it with a loud yelp. As he goes, his gun goes off, spraying the wall of the crater with bullets, and your heart sinks into your toes when you see where they land.

The crater is filled with cordyceps.

It’s taken a while, for FEDRA to figure out just how the fungus operates. They still don’t totally know, that much is for sure, but it’s not just in people. It’s underground, everywhere, branching out for miles in every direction, sprouting up through the earth in strange patches that you would almost think beautiful if you didn’t know firsthand the devastation they’ve brought. Disturb a patch in one place, and all you could do was pray that the Infected you’d awoken were too far away to get to you before you could get away from them.

The crater is lined with it, the cracked asphalt painted like a canvas, tufts of grass poking between, signs of nature taking back the earth. The sound of the bullets rings through your skull, the noise almost muffled as it breaks through the fungus.

Not a second later, you hear the screams.

There’s seven of you, total. You and Joel, Gwen, four of her men. Well, three, since Noah is now at the bottom of that crater, and hasn’t reappeared. You’re not optimistic.

Joel grabs your arm, pushes you behind him, towards the drugstore on the corner of the road. “Inside!” he barks, and you obey, purposeful strides carrying you towards the storefront, pulling your gun from the holster at your thigh as you go. Gwen waves her guys towards the building as well, and as soon as you’re through, Joel presses you into the wall, keeping himself between you and the outside.

Your heart is beating so hard you can hear it, your jaw solid and your grip on the bat so tight your knuckles are screaming in protest. Joel’s chest is heaving, his face a hard mask. You reach out, wrap your hand around his arm, squeeze lightly.

I’m here.

The screams echo through the city. It’s nothing new, to encounter Infected on a run. You’ve killed dozens of them at this point, bat, gun, knife. Whatever works. It’s become second nature, an unfortunate old habit. But the sound of them, no matter how many times you hear it, you still feel your spine bristle, like a cat that’s been cornered, making you want to hiss and spit.

Joel covers your hand with his, the other brandishing his gun. Slowly, he moves you back further, your back against the wall, inching away from the storefront. Maybe you could slip out the back, take the long way around back to the QZ, lose the Infected that way.

You open your mouth to suggest it to Joel just as the swarm of Infected sprints past the front of the drugstore. It’s unnerving, how fast they are, the way their bodies move in that almost-inhuman-almost-human way. Nerves rise in the back of your throat as your boots slide backwards on the tile, Joel still leading you backward.

It all happens in one instant.

There’s a door, towards the back of the drugstore. An office, break room, you don’t know, but it swings open, and something lunges at you, knocking you to the ground with insane force that pushes all the breath from your lungs, your head smacking against the ground, bat flying from your grip, ringing when it lands beside you. You slide into a long-empty shelf, metal cutting into your shoulder.

You hear Joel shout your name.

You feel something rip into your side, tearing flesh. You scream.

You smell blood.

You see flash of Joel’s gun, the barrel bright silver. Has it always been that bright?

The gunshot rings loudly through the drugstore, and all the heads that had turned to you — Joel, Gwen, her men — all turn back towards the outside. Most of the horde had gone straight to the crater, bodies tumbling into it, but some, maybe ten of them, all turn their heads towards the drugstore.

Joel stares at you, his eyes wide as dinner plates. You shove at the now-dead Infected, ignoring the drips of blood down your shoulder and side as you scramble to your feet, pulling your handgun from it’s holster. Your arms are shaking as you lift it, cover one hand with the other to steady your shots. This isn’t happening, this isn’t happening, this can’t be happening.

As the Infected start to draw into the drugstore, you all start shooting. The sound is piercing, echoing through your head, every nerve in your body pricking with pain with each shot that’s fired. Bodies drop, screams bounce off the walls, but you’re focused, picking them off one by one, ignoring the way your stomach turns with each one, the way you know what just happened, but you don’t — you can’t address it. Not yet.

This is happening.

Your clip runs out, and you drop to a knee, grabbing another from the holster, letting the empty clatter to the tile as you reload. For just a minute, Joel looks at you over his shoulder, his gun still raised, something you have no name for in his eyes.

This is happening.

Your blood is thrumming in your veins, birdsong you haven’t heard in a long time, making your ears ring, making your heart race. You keep pulling the trigger, half a mind to grab your bat off the ground and charge headfirst into the swam.

What difference would it make, anyway?

Gwen and her men move forward, brandishing knives to pick off the stragglers that climb through the broken windows. Joel lowers his gun, you shove yours back into its holster. He’s on you an instant later, turning you towards him, pulling at the fabric of your shirt. “Let me see.”

“Joel—” you start, pushing at his hands.

This is happening.

“Let me see,” he growls, and you relent, feeling your lip start to quiver as you let your arms drop, turning your head as he lifts the hem of your shirt. You hear his sharp intake of breath, see the crease between his brows deepen, and you know it’s exactly what you think. You felt it, different from the scratch Dean had given you on Outbreak Day. This was much different. Teeth, tearing, blood, saliva.

Infection.

Joel turns away, his face now pure anger. He kicks at the wall so hard his boot goes through, and you lift your shirt again, peering down at the wound. It’s a bite, no question. Teeth marks at the edge, blood seeping down your skin, turning the waist of your jeans dark.

This is happening.

Slowly, Gwen walks towards you. Joel cuts her off before she can get close, watching you inspecting your wound. “Oh god, Liv,” you hear her say, and behind her, someone cocks a gun. It makes you gasp, the sound choked, and Joel lifts his own gun.

“Get out of here,” he barks, his voice a terrifyingly deep register you’ve never heard before. “Now. I’ll deal with it. Go.”

Gwen just nods, gives you a sympathetic look before she’s herding her guys out, all of them picking their way around the bodies littering the floor. You let your shirt fall back down, the blood making the fabric cling to your skin. Your shoulder aches, blood soaking your shirt there too, but you’re too busy starting to lose your shit to really notice.

This is happening.

“Liv,” Joel says, his voice softer now, cracking around your name. Your chest aches. You just got him back. You can’t leave him, you can’t go, you can’t turn into— “Liv.”

You sink into a crouch. You bury your face in your hands, feeling the tears pour down your face. It’s done. It’s over. There’s no getting out of this. I’ll deal with it, Joel said. Meaning he’ll deal with you, meaning he’ll put you down. Knife or bullet, bullet or knife. What’s the kinder way to go? What’s the better way to let the love of your life kill you?

Which one will haunt him less, when you’re gone?

It’s not fair.

But it’s happening all the same.

Joel sinks down with you, slides his bag from his shoulders. You peek between your fingers just enough to see him pulling out bandages, a bottle of water, an alcohol wipe.

“Don’t waste it on me,” you mumble, pushing at his hands when he reaches for you. There’s blood on your hands, streaked up your forearms. “Don’t, Joel.”

“Stop it,” he says, shaking his head. His hair’s gotten longer, you notice, watching the dark curls ruffle along his scalp. “I’m gonna fix it.”

“You can’t!”

You scramble back, out of his reach, until your back hits another shelf. The metal rattles, your skull along with it, and you pull your knees to your chest, wrap your arms around them. It makes your side sing with pain, but it just adds to the mix, to the riot in your head, the ache in your heart.

“I’m sorry,” you murmur, barely above a whisper. Your voice is thick with tears, and they won’t stop. You know they can’t stop. You can’t stop.

“Liv—”

“I don’t want to leave you.”

The bottle of water slides from Joel’s hands, and your eyes track it as it rolls across the floor. You don’t want to spend the time you have like this, hiding from him, keeping your distance. It’s not fair. You just got him back, just got comfortable. Why did you let yourself get comfortable?

You want to die in his arms, to breathe your last breath with his eyes on your face, you want to—

“I saw Anna.”

The name makes you stop short, your head snapping up, eyes glued to him. Your heart skips, you’re sure of it, every drop of blood inside you freezing for one singular moment. He stares back at you, those dark eyes impossibly shiny, lined with silver tears that haven’t fallen yet.

“Anna?” you repeat. Are you going already? Is the fungus already in you, creeping up your spine, taking over your brain? You’re supposed to have more time, you’re supposed to—

“Anna, Liv. Anna, your sister. Six months after the outbreak. I saw her, when Tommy and I were on the road. Some makeshift shelter FEDRA set up in Cincinnati. She recognized me, nearly bowled me over when she saw me and Tommy.”

Your mouth drops open. “My…sister.” My sister, my baby sister, Anna, my little sister. Your mind whirls, Cowan’s voice in your head, the radio room before the walls went up. There is no record of Anna. Your heart is shattering in your chest, you’re sure of it. “She’s alive?”

His head drops. “A few of the soldiers got infected, started turning, started biting.” Joel swallows hard, and your eyes flick down as his throat bobs. “She got caught in the chaos, fuckin’ soldier bit her ankle. I put him down. And she hid it, at first, asked me and Tommy to get her to some guy outside the city. I can’t remember the name, said it was her boyfriend or something, I can’t…it doesn’t matter.

“We were planning to leave the shelter, trying to gather supplies to get the hell out of dodge, when she got caught. Someone walked in on her changing the bandage on her ankle, saw the bite, screamed for help. I tried to stop them, but FEDRA doesn’t take chances.”

“So they killed her,” you say, the words blunt, laced with tears.

“They took her away. I never saw a body.”

You shake your head, let your eyes drop closed. “Then why tell me, Joel?”

He slides across the tile to you, pulls at your limbs until your legs are spread either side of him, your arms limp in your lap. Before you can even try to shrink away, he’s got your face in his hands, wiping at your tears, warm palms pressed to your cheeks.

“It was three days, Liv. Three days between her getting bit and FEDRA taking her away. She never showed any signs, never turned, never fuckin’ twitched. She was immune. What if…” He leans forward until his forehead touches yours. “What if there’s a chance? What if you are too?”

Your mind is racing. The pain in your side throbs with every beat of your heart. You don’t have words, you can’t bring your lips to form them. Your brain offers up images, only making your thoughts move faster. The infection running rampant through you, replacing your blood stream, clogging your veins. Your sister, bruised by the outbreak, the loss of your parents — did she even know that they were dead? — but alive, those eyes bright as you remember them.

Her ankle, Joel had said. The soldier bit her ankle. In your head, she hides the bite beneath thick socks, cleans it and pulls her jeans down over it. Her eyes snap to yours, big and filled with tears.

“It’ll be okay, Liv. Just wait.”

Wait. Wait it out, wait to lose your mind, wait to turn into one of them. Wait to feel like you’re not in control of your body anymore. Would it still be you, buried beneath all of that? Does the fungus keep you alive, turn you into a puppet, make you watch the harm you cause, the violence that ensues?

But Joel wouldn’t let it get that far, would he?

Knife or bullet, bullet or knife. What’s the better way to go?

Your mind cycles through everyone back in Boston, Tess, Tommy, Emily, Henry, Deanna. Hell, even Cowan shows up. You see their faces, hear their voices, immediately imagining the reactions when Joel tells them what happened. And Emily, she—

Your brow goes hard, more tears slipping down your cheeks.

Emily watched her father kill her mother, after he turned. In the mall, before the wall went up, when you were still considering leaving. Contaminated food, they said, moved you to the apartments, made you wait it out. Six other people turned, FEDRA put them down without batting an eye. But you never did. You’d ate the same food as Tim, Emily’s father, the night before he turned. You both wanted Thai, Marcy and the kids had soup instead. You still remember Emily’s giggles when you slurped your noodles.

But you never turned.

Anna’s voice is in your head again. It’ll be okay, Liv.

You curl your fingers in the collar of Joel’s shirt, pushing at his chest slightly, enough that he pulls back, enough that your watery eyes can meet his. “We wait it out,” you tell him, and his brow crumples completely, a sharp sob in your ear as he collects you into his arms. “If I start to turn, Joel, I swear to god, you put me down and you don’t think twice about it, you understand?” You keep your gaze on his face, watch his eyes slip closed, and he nods. “You put me down, and then you go back to Boston. All right? You promise me. You go back, and you tell everyone I’m sorry.”

“Liv—”

“Promise me, Joel.”

He swallows so hard his throat bobs.

“I promise.”

You wait it out.

Joel feels like he can’t breathe. He doesn’t want to take his eyes off you, doesn’t want to miss anything. He’s memorizing you, all over again, trying to paint you in his mind. Something clear, something pure.

Something to remember.

In case he’s wrong. In case he has to put a bullet in your head before the sun comes up. In case he’s about to lose you. He wants to remember you as you are, not what you might become. Alive, intact, whole.

Liv.

You let him tend to your wounds, after a bit of convincing. Joel cleans the blood from your skin slowly, meticulously, tapes the gauze to your shoulder, to your side. He clears out the office your attacker had been hiding in, makes it as comfortable as he can. He can feel you watch him, just like he’s watching you, and one it’s safe — as safe as it can be — he sinks down beside you, puts his arm around your shoulders, pulls you against his chest.

And waits.

There aren’t many words. You flinch with every sound that echoes through the city, the creak of buildings, the shrieks of the Infected. Joel shushes you each time, hauls you closer until you end up across his lap, one arm banded around your back, the other hooked behind your knees, keeping you close. Closer. As close as possible.

Eventually, it gets so quiet that he can hear the thump of your heart, feel the flutter of your lashes where you face is buried in his neck. He rubs his hand up and down your arm slow, pushes his nose into your hair. You stretch out a bit in his arms, roll your head onto his shoulder, your eyes shut.

“Sleepy.”

He presses a soft kiss to your forehead. “Get some rest, darlin’. M’right here.”

You blink once, and your eyes are so shiny that Joel’s heart jumps in his chests. “What if I…?”

You trial off, the rest of the question left unsaid, but Joel finishes in his mind. What if you turn? What if you bite him? What if you take him down with you? He doesn’t care, he thinks, and is suddenly acutely aware of the ring sitting in his pocket.

“You won’t. I’ll stay awake. I won’t let you…I won’t let you turn, okay?” He leans down more, brushes a kiss across your mouth. You whimper, tightening your grip on his shirt. “I’m right here, Liv. Not goin’ anywhere.”

Your brow furrows as your eyes drop shut again, and Joel lifts his hand, drags his thumb over the crease in your skin. “I love you, Joel.”

He moves his thumb again, over and over until your face softens, but keeps it up even then. “Love you.”

He doesn’t mean to fall asleep. Knows he shouldn’t, knows he should be keeping an eye on you, but as the sky outside gets darker and darker, his lids get heavier and heavier. You’re a warm weight against him, your own eyes twitching as you dream, your breath hot on his neck. Dreams take hold of him — dreams, not nightmares — and he dreams of you, in a pretty white dress, his scavenged ring on your finger, a smile on your lips. He holds you in his mind, too, keeps you impossibly close, kisses you until he’s not sure where he ends and you begin.

And then he wakes.

To you.

To you, shoving at his shoulder, climbing into his lap, curling your fingers in his shirt. You’re crying, your hair a mess about your face, and it takes a moment for him to pull himself out of the dream version of you, to the real version.

“You were supposed to stay awake, you jackass!” you’re shouting, your voice breaking on the words. Your fist thumps against his chest. “I could have killed you! I could have—”

He’s very awake, suddenly. It’s…daytime. He can see the sunlight through the little window in the office door. Joel catches your wrists, stops you from hitting him again. You suck in a breath, freezing, and your head lifts, hair falling away from your face, fresh tears on your cheeks. He can’t stop himself from smiling, and his chest explodes with warmth when your grin matches his.

“But you didn’t.”

He pulls you against him, and you kiss the air from his lungs. Your mouth is hot and insistent on his, yanking your hands from his grip so you can dive them into his hair. His own drop to your waist, curling around your hips, pulling you closer, closer, closer.

You’re alive. You’re you.

He’d sit there and let you kiss him all day, but the echo of an Infected scream makes you both freeze, and his instincts kick into gear. With one last kiss, you disentangle from each other. Joel’s back screams in protest from sleeping sat up against the wall all night, and he groans as he gets to his feet, helps you to yours. You wince at the movement, one hand gripping your side, and Joel inspects you, lifts the hem of your shirt and peels the bandage back.

He’s seen bites before. Seen the strange, spidery lines the spread from them, the infection curling beneath the skin like a raised tattoo. Your wound is still angry, still seeping blood, but not enough to soak through the bandage. You might need stitches, Joel’s not sure. You wince again as he presses it back into o place, smooths his fingers along the tape.

“We need to get you home.”

You just nod, leaning against him, and he kisses your temple. The relief in the air is palpable, unbridled joy laced with nerves and worry. You have to keep this a secret, that much Joel knows. He still remembers the terror on Anna’s face, when they took her away. He tried to fight them, tried to stop it, but they put a gun to his head, to Tommy’s. Anna told him to stand down, to let her go, and then she was gone.

He won’t let them take you. Never.

It’s slow going. He takes you out the back way of the drugstore, avoiding the bodies littered at the front. Joel’s learned the city a little more with each run, he knows your shortcuts, the long and short ways, the quickest way back to the QZ in a pinch. He knows which routes you favour, which ones are last on your list.

He keeps your fingers laced with his, lets you lean into him as you walk. The pain you’re feeling is clear, but you grit your teeth and carry on, squeezing his hand tighter every few miles. He asks you if you need to stop a few times, and each time, you just shake your head.

It’s even slower, getting back over the wall. It’s midday, by the time you’re nearing the gate, and the ideal path — the one that takes you right under the wall — is too dangerous in broad fucking daylight. So you take the same path you’d lead Joel and Tess in with. Your chest is heaving by the time you reach the top, and Joel lifts the hem of your shirt to see you’ve bled through the bandage, drops of blood sliding down your hip.

You stop inside, Joel forcing you to wait a goddamn second so he can clean you up, replace the bandage. He grits his teeth; he can’t take you to the clinic, can’t involve Deanna in this. Can’t involve anyone in this.

“What the fuck are you two doing?”

Corporal Nick fucking Cowan is standing at the mouth of the alley, gun hefted in his hands as Joel lands on the pavement, holding his arms out as you climb slowly down the ladder of the fire escape. It’s a good five foot drop down, and he knows even landing on your feet isn’t gonna feel great.

Joel stumbles back as you drop, your boots sliding against the asphalt. He tries to support your weight as much as he can, and you let out a sound that’s not so much a wince as a sob. You bury your hand in your side, gripping tight as he slides his arm around your waist.

“Nick,” you breathe out, and Joel looks up to see the soldier glance down the road before jogging towards you, concern on his face.

“Where the fuck have you been?” he asks, and you heave a breath, your head lolling onto Joel’s shoulder. “Tess came to find me last night, asked if I’d seen you, if you’d gotten yourselves thrown in lockup.” His brow hardens as he looks at you, looks at Joel. “You were out all night?”

Joel tightens his grip on you. “Didn’t plan it like that.”

“We got cornered by a fucking horde of them,” you breathe out, hissing as you take a step forward. Cowan holds a hand out to you and you wave him off. “I got…”

You trail off, and Joel bristles, scared you’re gonna say it.

Bit.

Cowan wants answers, pressing harder, and Joel can see how he’s inspecting you, his eyes darting all over you. “You what, Liv?”

“I got hurt, asshole,” you spit through gritted teeth, trying to angle yourself away from him. “Is that really not obvious?”

“I’ll take you to the clinic,” Cowan says instantly, and reaches for you again. Joel nearly growls. He knows you made your peace or whatever, but he still doesn’t like the guy. Doesn’t like that he acts like he’s got some kind of claim on you. “Deanna’s working, she can—”

“No,” you both say at the same time, nearly shouting, and Cowan takes a step back, staring between you, trying to meet your eyes. Joel can see it, the wheels working in the soldier’s head. You straighten a bit, staring back at Cowan. “I’m fine, I just wanna get home.”

For a minute, Joel thinks Cowan will accept the answer. He pulls you tighter against him, tries to sidestep the soldier, taking you with him. But he’s still blocking your path, and everything in Joel turns over as he reaches for the handgun on his hip.

“Show me.”

You freeze, your entire body going taut in Joel’s grip. “What?”

Cowan doesn’t lift the gun, but Joel sees his thumb pull back the hammer, cocking it. He reaches for his own gun.

“Nick, what’re you—” you start, but then the soldier lifts his gun, aiming for you.

Joel steps in front of you, shielding you with his body, holding an arm out, lifting his pistol, aiming right back at Cowan. “Cowan, stop it,” Joel grits, and the soldier just stares back, his eyes wide.

“You are the last fucking person who gets to give me orders.”

“I know that,” Joel replies, and lifts both his hands, something like surrender. He points his gun at the sky, feels your hand curl around his hip. “I know you hate me. I’d hate me too, if roles were reversed, and I don’t expect you to do me any fuckin’ favours. But I know you care about her. So, please. Do this for her.”

The gun wobbles slightly, but Cowan shakes his head. “Don’t.”

“Please, Nick,” Joel hears you say, a waver in your voice, your nails biting into his skin. “Please, just let us go. We’ll leave the city, we can just—”

“No!” Cowan shouts, the sound echoing down the alley. “You know I can’t.”

“Nick, please,” you say again, and the gun wobbles again, Joel moving to put himself in front of it, to keep it away from you.

“Put the gun down, Cowan,” Joel says, his hands still in the air, trying to force reason into his voice. “Just put it down, we can fix this, we can talk this out, just—”

“Shut up!” Cowan yells, and Joel’s heart is in his throat. “You don’t deserve her, Joel. Look what you did, you put her in harm’s way, over and over and over again. You nearly got her killed, and still she chooses you over me.”

“Nick, stop—” you cry, and Joel can hear the tears in your voice. The gun points at you again, and anger, fear, terror rises in Joel’s gut. He points his gun back at Cowan, finger twitching on the trigger.

“You don’t fucking deserve her.”

“And you do?”

Joel’s not sure which one of them fires first.

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#my fics #strawberry wine #joel miller #joel miller fic #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel miller fluff #joel miller angst #the last of us #the last of us fic #the last of us spoilers #joel miller x oc #joel miller x liv stone

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morallyinept · 4 months

Text

A full transcribe of MARCUS PIKE'S dialogue/lines from the TV show THE MENTALIST

Includes full dialogue, and dialogue from any deleted/additional scenes available.

I've created this as a point of reference when writing for Pedro's characters, and I hope you find it useful. Even if you just want to read the dialogue. 🖤

FULL MASTERLIST OF PEDRO CHARACTERS DIALOGUE

☝🏻Dialogue has been fully transcribed by myself using reference to original scripts (if available), audio subtitles and using my own two ears. Therefore, mistakes can be made, however I have tried to be as fully accurate as I can. If you spot an obvious mistake, please kindly let me know. Where audio is not clear, I have marked with *inaudible* Scenes are separated for ease of reference.

FULL SCRIPT DIALOGUE: (ALL EPISODES - MARCUS WAS IN 6 EPISODES IN SEASON 6 AND 1 EPISODE IN SEASON 7)

EP 16, S6 VIOLETS

Mrs Hennigan, why was your husband trying to save this painting in particular?

We’ll do our best to get it back for you.

I’m special agent Marcus Pike, this is agent Searles. You’re… Patrick Jane, right? Abbot’s guy?

What makes you say that?

Sure. I’ve heard good things about you. We’d be happy to have your input. These guys, they’re… they’re really good. And our cases don’t usually lead to homicide.

__________________

Art thieves used to be about sneaking. Night time break-ins. Not anymore. The new generation prefers guns. This guy is the leader. He does the talking, runs the show. But until yesterday morning, he’s never killed anybody. They’ve done about six jobs between Dallas and Phoenix in the last two years, taking down about one hundred million worth in art and artefacts.

Stolen art can take a long time to sell. So our guess is they’re sitting on a lot of the art, including the paintings from yesterday's heist.

Well, they’ve only slipped up once. We found a glove a few blocks from a gallery they robbed in Phoenix. We managed to get a partial print and we got a hit. Aaron Polaski. Time for armed robbery and battery, he’s also the former middleweight boxing champ at Fulsom prison.

Yeah, we brought him in for questioning but he lawyered up quick and told the CIP. These guys are pros.

We do, but nothings popped. Doesn't seem to have a lot of friends. He hangs out a lot at a bar on sixth street.

So, how do we do that?

I don’t know what any of that means.

__________________

I always feel a little bit like Aladdin right here.

It’s stolen.

Sometimes we just get part of a haul. We sit on the art so the crooks don’t know we have a lead and we keep it here while we investigate the rest of it.

Well, we keep a pretty tight lid. Our own secret museum.

No. Just, once or twice…

Well, I-I don’t wanna second guess you, Mr Jane, but if you wanna use these paintings as bait, the guy running this crew knows a lot about art, he’ll know this stuff is stolen.

__________________

We ready?

What the hell’s that?

He asked him for some napkins, so?

__________________

No, he's gonna do it… watch.

There you go.

__________________

Pass the rice, please.

It’s a drug forfeiture. On loan from the DEA. So, what’s the story with Jane and Lisbon?

No, I mean are they in a relationship? A couple?

It’s going good. You got a nice red cross.

Yeah.

__________________

This is Pike.

Okay, well, we, uh… we shut down the inside cameras, so you don’t have to worry about any more prying eyes, and just so you know there is someone outside the house, we’re guessing it’s another one of McCabe’s crew.

No, we’ve got eyes on ‘em. Don’t worry. You’re safe. I wouldn’t lie to you.

Well you’re… you were real good.

Well, that’s a shame. There’s a pretty good diner just down the street from you. Biscuits and gravy, if that’s your thing.

Alright, well what about pancakes?

They have about six kinds; chocolate chip, banana, all that good stuff.

Maybe, just a… little bit. I can have some sent over to you.

No, you’re right I won’t tease you anymore. I won’t even mention the waffles.

Right, well I don’t know what a canape is, but bon appetit. Goodnight, Lisbon.

__________________

This is the part I don’t understand; we’re not gonna rob the museum?

Why not? I mean, he robs the paintings from the museum, we catch them red handed, case closed. We all go home.

Then why is he at the museum with Jane?

__________________

How is it?

You probably like that Chicago style stuff, right?

Hmm… I'm not really in the mood for pizza. You know what sounds good? Those pancakes we were talking about before.

Do you wanna go?

Yeah. Dinner is the best time for breakfast. What do you say?

Look, if you don’t wanna go, just say so. We’re cool. It’s good, but I like you, and I think you’re a hell of a good looking woman and I’d love to get to know you better.

Let’s go.

__________________

Uh… well, uh… Y-you-

__________________

EP 18 S6 FOREST GREEN

Hey.

Coffee?

I made you breakfast.

Well when there’s a guest, I like to make a fuss.

Yeah?

It’s just work stuff. Listen, I was wondering if we could get dinner tonight? Or… is that weird because we went out last night? Is-is two nights in a row weird?

Okay, good. I’ll make a reservation.

Well, like I said, I like to make a fuss.

Yeah.

__________________

I came looking for you, but they said you’re still in the woods. I’m disappointed.

No problem. What’s holding you up?

Have your people tried accessing a forestry satellite? They’re imaging that area all the time looking for fire outbreaks.

I used one once to find a guy who was running with some stolen Frederick Remmingtons.

Bye.

__________________

No, it’s okay. I took another girl out to dinner last night instead.

Yeah.

Gladys. Eg-Eg-Egbert.

It’s the best I could do in the spur of the moment.

Oh, well, I’m glad. I’m a lousy liar, so you’re right. Actually, there’s uh, something I wanted to tell you.

That work stuff, it’s actually a promotion. The Bureau is forming a task force to deal with international art theft. It’ll be working with Scotland Yard and a few other agencies. Long story short, they, uh, they-they want me to run it. Yeah, but they want me to run it from DC.

So, I’m telling them no.

Well, I’m allowed.

I’m not a kid. I’ve been married and divorced. I know when something’s real. And when it could get serious. I feel that way about us. Do you… feel that way?

Look, one thing I know is that when you feel that way about someone, you gotta hang on ‘cause… because it doesn't happen very often.

I know. It’s okay.

What if you came with me?

I’m asking what if we went to DC, you and me, together? What do you think of that, Teresa?

__________________

EP 19 S6 BROWN EYED GIRLS

You fell asleep.

So listen, urm… turns out my old band’s playing a gig downtown tonight. Do you wanna go?

I never told you I was in a band?

Bass. Vocals.

Yeah?

Okay then. We need a cab.

Was that “do you like butter with your popcorn” or “will you come with me to DC?”

I understand, a hundred per cent. Take your time, there’s no deadline.

You’re welcome.

Go ahead.

__________________

I got some Thai from that place over on South Congress.

I know.

Not really, I have an ulterior motive. Just trying to make DC look attractive.

Yeah… yeah…

__________________

Hey.

Guess what? That show we missed the other night. They’re playing another one in forty-five minutes, we can catch it if… if you guys are done?

See ya, Patrick.

__________________

Am I interrupting?

I heard about your grand jury. I’m pulling for you. But I think you did what any good father and husband would do.

__________________

EP 20 S6 II TOVOLO BIANCO

Oh. Oh look, Casablanca’s on. “Here’s looking at you, kid.” You know Bogart made that line up? It wasn’t in the script.

What? Are you serious?

This is not an old movie! This is a classic, you gotta watch this. You’re gonna love it.

Is everything okay?

Well, Teresa, I may not be able to read minds like Jane, but even I can tell when something’s going on.

Do you wanna talk about it?

Just wanna say that I know that moving to DC is a big thing and it might raise issues you don’t feel totally comfortable talking to me about, but I just want you to know it’s okay. You go through whatever process you need to, just… let me know when you make a decision. I’ll be here.

Well, various things, but basically it’s a love story about a woman who has to choose between two men. There’s also a baseball game on.

Yeah, let’s do that.

__________________

Jane?

Yeah. Teresa! It’s, uh… It’s Jane…

__________________

EP 21 S6 BLACK HEARTS

So… what are you thinking?

Well, Abbot’s right, it’s a great job. And Don’s the best.

Look, Teresa. I’ve been patient. But… I kind of went out on a limb for you. Pushed Don to pass on other candidates so that I could have you with me in DC. I mean, I know it’s a big decision, but it’s a decision you need to make.

__________________

There you are. Ready to go?

Look, about, uh, DC. I know it’s a lot to take in and I didn’t mean to pressure you.

Yeah, I did. Maybe a little. But, it’s your life and… I just wanna be a part of it.

Are you sure?

Wow…. wow, I wish we were somewhere more romantic, but… but what the hell. Will you marry me?

Don’t freak out.

I know, I know. You need time to think about it.

There’s no pressure, okay?

You’re a tough date. Have you told Jane that you’re leaving yet?

Oh. He’ll understand.

I’ll be downstairs.

__________________

EP 22 S6 BLUE BIRD

Hey, sweetheart, How are ya?

Yes!

Okay. Alright, alright. Text me your flight information and I’ll be there. Teresa, it’s gonna be great, you’re gonna love the neighbourhood. It’s-it’s full of restaurants, your favourite kind, I got a number to an excellent… (fades out)

__________________

EP 1 S7 NOTHING BUT BLUE SKIES

Jane.

I was, uh, looking for Teresa.

Yeah, she probably is.

It’s for an undercover thing. So, it’s, uh… you and her.

I know. I know that. So do you have a plan?

Well, I was offering her a life. A home, a family if she wanted one. A future. Have you thought about any of that?

Well, what are you offering her? I mean, other than Patrick Jane?

Well I was upstairs, giving a deposition. I thought I would say hi. Stupid idea.

Anyway, It’s good to see you, Teresa.

Jane.

__________________

FULL MASTERLIST OF PEDRO CHARACTERS DIALOGUE

#pedro pascal #marcus pike #pedro pascal characters #marcus pike the mentalist #the mentalist #PPCU #marcus pike dialogue

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certifiedlovergirlsstuff · 11 months

Text

as it was

pairing: peter parker x sister!reader

WC: 3K

warnings: small mentions of anxiety, maybe some cursing, just no way home angst. there is no physical description of reader, so you could read this as adopted!reader or however.

summary: you feel like there’s something missing from your life when may dies. you just aren’t sure what that thing is.

A/N: i started this april 11, 2022. something just came upon me to start writing for this draft again. i dont live in nyc so ignore all directions. my own gif (that’s why it’s shit)

@alecmores my editor💗

been in the drafts since march 25

masterlist

You were sitting in front of her grave.

The cold chill of New York winter settles into your bones. The trees were barren of any leaves with autumn having left a few weeks ago, no snowfall yet thankfully. The grass has been freshly cut along with some watering causing you to sit in a bit of wet grass, at least your coat was taking the moisture.

You brought some new flowers, just some simple white roses. The other flowers have been slowly wilting since your last visit, and you never want to have dead flowers resting with Aunt May’s grave.

As you replace the flora you sit back on the ground with the wilting stems staying in your hands to keep you from fidgeting around and picking the grass as you talk to her. You try to visit once a week, but sometimes you can only come twice a month because it will just hit you really hard one day that you have no one left, no immediate family anymore. The closest you have to any type of family is Happy Hogan, MJ, and Ned, which is kind of weird because when you think of your memories that involve the three of them, something is missing, a piece of a puzzle that won’t fit in its place.

“How are you today, may?” The wind just blows the hair around your face in different directions.

“I started to work at the Peter Pan cafe with MJ. Sometimes we have shifts together, but honestly, it’s kinda rare since it doesn’t get too busy there. The boss is an older man who’s lazy and has a snippy attitude for no reason, but it's an easy job. Don’t have to worry about my anxiety kicking in.” You stared down at your gloved-covered hands that clutched your crossed legs. Your lips rolled together as you let the silence cover you, thinking of what else to mention.

“Uh… Happy. Happy- he misses you, I miss you. He- uh… he took me in, unofficially adopted me. I’m thankful for him cause if I had to do all this- this, I don’t know, just I’m thankful he took pity on me and didn’t leave me to the wolves. MJ and Ned said they would’ve taken me in, but I think they just said it out of friendliness.” You shrugged your shoulders at the thought.

You perked your head up and glanced around the cemetery. Dozens of headstones, some having more grandeur stone carvings with angels or whatever. Fallen autumn leaves tumbled and kicked across the grass, sticking to trees or headstones before a breeze pushed them away and further off. It seemed you were the only person visiting a loved one at the moment, you wished someone accompanied you, but you liked being with May by yourself.

“Oh, uh, school. Probably want to know about school. I- I- I think I’m gonna take a gap year. Process and readjust to everything and I know if I was doing school I wouldn’t give my all and I don’t want to let you down. Plus, I need money and so I’ll probably need to work a few jobs- wanna help Happy with bills so he doesn’t feel stuck with me.”

A puff of air left your lips as you rubbed your arms up and down your biceps to get a good warmth back into your bones so you could stay longer. With a lick to your lips and a furrow to your brow, you hesitantly spoke a thought that’s been sitting on your tongue for a while, only feeling brave to speak them towards May.

“Ever since you- since you left… something has felt… off. I- I don’t even know what feels off, just that I’m missing something- someone in my life. But I don’t have anyone else. Mom and dad were gone too soon for me to remember their faces, Ben passed away a few years ago and then all I had was you. May... you’ve been my mom, you are my mom. And- and when the blip happened and we came back, that was the scariest thing I’ve ever experienced. Feeling like you were gone for only a minute but then people are telling you that it’s been five years and half the population turned to dust… but you came back and I felt safe again. And we got back into some normal groove again. And then hearing that you got into an accident and were killed-” your throat started to choke with restrained tears, “I’ve never been more scared in my whole life.”

You let a cry free before pulling yourself back in, wanting to continue your rant, “but, what I’m trying to get at… something feels out of place. I feel like someone is missing from the giant picture, memories feel like they’ve been edited- cutting out that person from our life, my life. Memories with MJ and Ned feel weird, and memories with Happy feel weird as well. Like trying to think about how the two of you met… something is burned away. I- I don’t know, probably just trying to find something to focus on.”

Your eyes met the dark stone, the words May Parker engraved with her date of birth and death. Your shoulders sagged, you were just talking to air about a nagging thought. Should probably look into getting therapy.

“I should start heading back, Happy’s probably worried about me.” You dusted your jacket and pants clean of any grass, might have a few wet spots soaking the fabric.

You stuffed your hands into the jacket pockets and just stood, not making an effort to leave just yet. There was a crunching of leaves that soon filled the quiet and you didn’t think anything of it, it could have been another visitor or Happy who came to visit and take you home, which happened a few times already. But when you looked in your periphery, it wasn’t someone at another grave and it wasn’t Happy. It was a boy.

Out of curiosity, you turned your head enough to get a proper look at the new arrival. You eyed him from head to toe, never seeing him around before. He looked to be about your age, just a teenager. A beanie covered his head, he wore a blue puffer jacket with a few stripes at the top with simple jeans and sneakers, nothing standing out. But there was just something about him…

“How did you know May?” The mystery boy spoke. It took you off guard, “huh?” Was all that came out. He cleared his throat and jerked his chin, again, “how- uh- how did you know May?” He turned to you before turning away.

“Oh, she- she was my aunt. Well, my mom really. Lived with her when I was young.” You stopped there and it was silent. You counted to five before asking, “how did you know her? If I may ask?” Your manners popping in.

The boy was quiet, eyes set on her name. He sniffled then wet his lips, “feast. I knew her from feast. She was- she was nice, always kind to everyone. She was like the mother I never had. I’m glad you had her as family.” His voice cracked on the word family, something you noted but didn’t push for further.

“Yeah. She was always looking out for the little guys.” A smile to your lips. “Was it just the two of you?” The boy asked then backed tracked, “only if you feel comfortable saying. Sorry, it just- it just slipped.”

You looked at the boy. He wasn’t fidgeting, but you could tell from his eyes that he was nervous about something. Your eyes just wandered over him, sure it may seem rude but you couldn’t help it. It was like a magnet was pulling you and you couldn’t resist the hold it had on you. You thought about lying to this stranger, but you didn’t. “Yeah. Well, it wasn’t always just the two of us. She had a husband, his name was Ben, and he’s buried in his home state. But he got shot during a robbery about… a decade ago… blip time difference is weird.” You mumbled off, realizing he died five years ago for you but with your dusting, that added an extra five. The boy agreed with a light chuckle, it warmed you.

“What about you? Any family still with you?” Bouncing back on his question.

His eyes drooped a slight frown on his face, “uh…no. No family, just me.” His eyes caught yours before, once again, looking away. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to-“ “Oh! No, it’s- it’s fine. I was asking the questions first anyway.”

You rolled your lips as you swayed on your feet. Neither of you decided to speak, just stood beside each other as you stared at the headstone and listened to the leaves falling. You wanted to look at the boy again but withheld yourself from doing so.

“I should- I should head home. But it was nice to meet you…” you trailed off hoping he’ll present his name. “Peter… Peter Parker.” He held a smile at the last name.

“Huh, funny coincidence. I’m (Y/n), Parker obviously.” You bid Peter a smile goodbye and turned your back to make your walk to the subway.

“Hey! Uh (Y/n)!” You heard the shouts and the crunching of leaves beneath his feet as he hurried to catch up with you. You stopped your steps and looked at Peter as he stopped a few steps away.

“Do you… do you take the subway?” “Yeah…”

“Do you mind if I walk you? I just- I would just feel a lot better knowing you made it safely plus I think May would… sorry- sorry. Only if you want, of course, I mean you just met me and-“

You stepped closer and touched his arm, “hey, it’s fine. I would like the company. Plus, it’s just the subway, you’re not walking me to the front door.” You shrugged at the end before nodding your head to the iron gates.

The two of you traveled down the busy and packed streets of New York. Shifting and turning your bodies so you didn’t bump into anyone, especially someone who wasn’t in the right mood that day. The walking was quiet at first, two strangers who just met and didn’t know what boundaries were already drawn. You kept making glances at Peter beside you before looking away, at the sky or the buildings around you.

“Are you in school?” Peter was the first to ask, once again. You were thankful he took the first steps.

“Oh, well I’m eighteen so I’m about to graduate high school. And I was planning to go to college, out of state or in state, not sure. But after May… I’m taking a gap year. Want to get my bearings first before I focus back on school… How’s your academic future?” You eyed him as he watched you talk.

“Uh, well I’m eighteen as well. And something happened during the school year so I kinda have to start senior year over again. I was planning to go to MIT for college, but that’ll just have to wait.” He scratched his nose before stuffing his hand back into his jacket pocket.

“Another coincidence. Two of my friends are going.” You saw the smile Peter tried to hide from your comment.

“Do you have a job, Mr. Parker?” Already giving joking nicknames.

You didn’t notice the stiffness to his shoulders or the sadness that glazed over his eyes before stuttering, “uh, I’ve applied to a- a few different jobs. Kinda hard- not a high school graduate so my options are limited. Gotta look for the desperate places.”

“But those are kinda sketchy. Not the safest.”

His attention was on you, “yeah, well, I can handle myself.” He nudged your arm and pulled a smile from you as you shook your head. “What about you? Any sketchy jobs?”

“Not sketchy, just boring and quiet. I work at a small café with my friend. An easy job since I have anxiety.” You keep your answers vague with enough detail.

Silence came back around. Cars honking and people talking to each other or over the phone. Couples holding hands or looped around each other.

“Anyone special in your life?” Was your first question to come to mind.

You weren’t sure if the flush was due to the low temperature or the abrupt question towards Peter, who’s still a stranger, about if he was seeing someone.

“No, no. I- I had someone, but she left me. For the best, I think.”

“Why is that? Secretly with the mob or something?”

He laughed, “Nah, nothing like that. Just… I'm broken and a mess. Don’t want her dealing with… all that.” He made a circling hand gesture. You just hummed.

You weren’t paying much attention to your surroundings so you didn’t see the group of kids running and pushing into everyone coming your way. So with a tight hold on your bicep and a yank, you yelped and looked around. Peter pulled you behind him and you followed his eyes as you watched the kids pass as they shouted and yelled.

“Stupid kids.” You muttered before continuing your walk. “Thank you, for pulling me.” “Oh, it’s nothing.”

You were only a block or two away from a station.

“What about you?” “What about me?” “Anyone special?” He had a playful tone to his words. You just shrugged your shoulders.

“I’ve never been anyone’s first choice. I stick more to the shadows anyway, used to get bullied, so I keep my head down and mouth closed,” you looked to see if he was listening, and he was, “also, I’m kinda a hopeless romantic. Romance books, love songs; especially Taylor Swift's love songs, and a few rom-coms. Anyway, what I’m saying is that, no. No one special, probably not for a while. But maybe that’s okay, maybe I’ll find ‘the one’ when it’s time.”

Peter didn’t respond to your words. You smacked a hand over your face.

“What? What’s-“ “I just spilled my random thoughts to you, who’s still a stranger.”

You pulled your hand away and ran your fingers through your hair before moving it to your pocket for warmth. You looked at Peter and you were just full-on staring, eyes roving over his side profile or his face if he looked your way before facing forward. A tilt of your head came up.

“You know… maybe it wasn’t a coincidence.” You kept looking at Peter. “What wasn’t?” His eyes were on his feet.

“Meeting each other.” And you looked away just as Peter almost tried over his feet even as he watched every step. You kept walking, not aware of the cogs turning in Peter’s mind as he processed your words.

“What- What do you mean? How isn’t this a coincidence? I think it was just lucky timing.”

You threw a hand out as you talked, “What I mean is… maybe May sent you this way. Two people she knew and cared about, both lonely and without a family around. Plus come on, your last name is Parker. That's just crazy. I don’t know, just- it’s just crazy!”

You smiled at the boy as you crossed the street and walked down the crowded and smelly stairs leading to the subway. You checked to see if Peter was still with you and when you saw he was pushed back by a few people, you moved to the side and waited for him to meet your side. You flashed a smile when he reappeared and you both continued on your walk toward the entrances. You checked to see if any cops were around and seeing none you hopped over the spinning entrance, Peter a second behind.

“What train do you take?” “A train, you?” “F for me.”

You thought this meant that the two of you would split up, but Peter walked with you and stayed by your side as you waited for your train to arrive. You checked your pockets to make sure you had your phone, wallet, keys, and headphones, along with your taser and pepper spray that Happy bought for you. You texted Happy that you were waiting for your train and should be home within the hour.

After about thirty-five minutes you heard the screeching of wheels on tracks and saw the lights glow into the station. You turned to Peter with a smile, “well, looks like my ride's here.” He nodded at your words and he opened his mouth and then closed it. You stayed back seeing if he’ll say the words on his mind.

As the train got closer and he didn’t say anything you decided to be the first to speak. “Would it be okay if I get your number? I- I know we just met, but… you seem like a good friend.” You cringed a bit, it was almost like a terrible pickup line. And you weren’t hitting on him, it just felt gross to even think that.

“Yeah, yeah. I’d love to have a friend.” Peter stopped your worrying thoughts. You passed him your phone and then he passed it back before pulling his out and showing a text on his home screen.

You started towards the open doors and passed the rushing people and with a quick turn, you called out to Peter and he looked your way waiting to hear what you needed to say before you let the subway whisks you away.

“Stop by feast when you can. We can always use the extra hands and May would be thankful.” And before you got any reply you walked further into the metal tub and took a seat, sticking an earbud in and pressing play on an album you’ve had on repeat.

Already planning to visit May tomorrow after your morning shift to talk about your new friend. And Peter would keep watch from a distance and when you left he would speak with May quietly. Promising her that he’ll keep you safe and be your friend, maybe not your brother never again, only in his mind.

…

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cowboyfromh3ll · 6 months

Note

a little bit of John's fear of commitment for the angsty girls in the back

Me And My Husband

(John Marston x Fem!Reader Angst/Fluff)

Warnings: Angsty, John's usual fear of commitment, arguing

For the earlier half of your and John’s relationship, the two of you liked to keep things under wraps. You kept your relations hidden under a veil of privacy; though there were still many wordy ruminations of ardor in private. You’d produce the occasional poem, which you’d give to him to read after sex. The two of you thought it to be a rather juvenile gesture, but sweet nonetheless. And if read by anyone outside of the two of you, it would be obvious you were smitten with him. You frequently told him you loved him, a behavior he often encouraged by a response of reciprocation. There were many spontaneous dates, many passionate exchanges, many nights where you lay together in his tent and many contemplations of your future together.

Overtime he claimed he didn’t want to use the word ‘love’ anymore; that you should be able to feel it by now, and that repeating it over and over to each other was unnecessary. This often became a point of contention between the two of you. Arguments would ensue where you often argued that no matter how childish he thought it was, it’s still a nice thing to say to one another, and that it offered you a sense of reassurance. And reassurance was the one thing you needed right now. The ache in your chest would be temporarily remedied by gratifying sex, which would momentarily allow you to push away your worries to the back of your mind.

You composed less poems than you had before; John’s hastiness in reading them suggested he wasn’t interested in them. There were often nights where you’d hand him one and he’d stash it somewhere, not caring to look exactly where, and insist he read it after he wakes up. But when you asked him if he liked it the next day, only to be given a confused stare and told “what poem?”, you knew he hadn’t read it.

“You want to get married right?” You’d ask, laying your head on his chest while the rest of you laid on the grassy pasture beneath the two of you. You’d feel the vibrations in his chest as he hummed in confusion.

“We’re already married.” He produced a tired response, a yawn slipping past his lips. It was early afternoon, was he really tired? Or was this conversation just such a fatigued topic that he was no longer interested in having it. In fact, his response would’ve initially given you the satisfaction you needed to leave it alone, but as you begun to dig for specifics, you noticed how he began to skimp out on details, dodging and avoiding certain aspects as if you were a Pinkerton trying to interrogate him for answers on a recent crime. You didn’t appreciate his attitude towards the topic, but at least pushing it would rile him up to the point of receiving some sort of genuine answer; be it good or bad, you just wanted some form of palpable response from him.

His response caused you to lift your head from his chest, looking at him straight in the eye.

“What?” He looked back at you, a confused look coming over his face. It was not legitimate confusion as though he were a kid trying to work out a math problem he just couldn’t figure out; no, instead it was one of annoyed perplexion, like he were a kid who had just finished a long list of chores and was beckoned forth by his mother, anticipating another arduous job.

“I mean for real, like with a wedding and a ring. I wanna get married in front of god.” You urged, a hopeful glint in your eye.

“I mean, I don’t know about that yet. Don’t you think you’re fast forwarding a bit?” He sighed, perhaps a bit too harshly, because it came out more like a scoff. You persisted though.

“John, we've been together for so long now!” You slapped his chest, moving to sit on your knees next to where he lay. He scoffed intentionally now.

“Don’t you see me in your future?” Your voice wavered, your inflection desperate. John sighed, sitting up alongside you. “Look, (Name)-”

“Do you love me?!” You were frantic now, clutching the fabrics of your skirt at your knees. Your knuckles turned white as you pulled anxiously; the stitches you had sewn on there yesterday ready to tear once again.

“This is tedious…” He sighed, cupping his forehead.

“Do you love me!” It came out as more of a demand, imploring him for any sort of response that didn’t dance around the question. You just needed some form of clarity, some form of directness.

“What do you think?” He responded with aggravation. You neither nodded nor shook your head. There was a moment of shared realization between the two of you that neither of you wanted to address. Too scared to confront it.

“Y’know, you think EVERYTHING about me is tedious now.” You moved your hands in the air animatedly to emphasize your point. “You can’t entertain my little wedding fantasies. You can’t even say I love you back! What? Because it’s too laborious for you? You think you’re too good for that?”

“You know how I feel about you, (Name).” He tried to reach for your hand, but you promptly slapped his wrist away from you. For a moment, his eyes flashed a resemblance to a kicked puppy.

“Well if you feel it, why can’t you say it?” You sobbed, hugging your knees to your chest now. The two of you faced each other defensively. It felt more like you were having an argument against an adversary than having a productive conversation with your man. Silence settled in between you two as you both contemplated your next moves, not quite knowing how to navigate this difficult situation. But in your mind, these were simple circumstances. Though even if John finally said he loved you, you weren’t sure you’d feel better at all again.

John sighed and shrugged his shoulders; that being the only response he could muster. You scoffed angrily before standing up from where you sat next to him, storming off wordlessly, and without giving him a second glance. You just wanted to hear it—you couldn’t understand why he wouldn’t say it. You bit your quivering lip in an attempt to hold your tears back, bee lining towards the girls’ tent. You thought you were doing a good job at containing your river of emotion behind a dam, but when Mary-Beth looked up at you with a face of bewildered concern, her eyes softening in realization, and she asked you “Are you okay?”, you were done for.

At once, you crumbled in on yourself, your shoulders beginning in a series of heaves and irregular trembles. Your cries were silent at first, until Mary-Beth pulled you into her arms, bringing you down to your knees. Your cries grew in volume, drawing the attention of a few gang members, namely Tilly and Karen, and the two scurried to your side quickly in concern. You received a flurry of questions from the three of them as they ushered you away from camp towards a more private area, away from curious eyes.

“It’s in his tone, like, in his voice and in the way he talks to me. It’s like he’s working up the courage to say something!” You sobbed, receiving a chorus of pitiful “oh”s. It wasn’t the first time the camp girls had heard your endless rants about your love life. They’d seen your relationship from the very beginning, even from the days where you merely had a crush on John. Now they were subject to every little detail about your partnership with him.

“What if he’s working up the courage to say I love you?” Mary-Beth suggested.

“But why now?! He used to say it all the time so what changed?” You asked, hoping from some sort of answer that would satiate your need for clarity. But you knew that the girls could not provide it. Not even the man you loved could provide it, and that drove you crazy.

“What if I’ve scared him off though? Like, with my neediness! I always say I love you and I even wrote those stupid poems for him. And I talk about our future and marriage, and what if that’s too much for him?!” The words flew out of your mouth now like the tears from your eyes. You’d resorted to wiping away your snot and tears on your arm until Tilly handed you a handkerchief.

“But you two have been together so long. You’re not irrational for wanting to discuss those things. And if he doesn’t want the same things then he needs to be direct.” Tilly squeezed your shoulders and moved you to look at her as the two other girls nodded.

“But I’m always leaning on him and—”

“Leaning on him how?” Karen asked.

“Well… Like, wanting reassurance and stuff…”

The three girls looked at each other in shared disbelief.

“Well, that’s what he’s there for…” Mary-Beth said softly.

“But he says I shouldn’t need it, I should just know!” You argued. It sounded more like you were defending John at this point.

“Well, maybe…” Karen began hesitantly. “Maybe he’s just not the right guy…”

You took a moment to finish cleaning your face up with the handkerchief before handing it back to Tilly, who held it an arm’s length away. You thanked them promptly before standing up and storming back to camp. You felt their troubled stares on your back, and you felt the urge to arch your back inwards as if you were splashed with cold water from behind.

You had decided to isolate yourself for the later half of the day, keeping to your own devices just outside of camp as you leaned up against a tree and read. Mary-Beth had approached you momentarily to offer you a spot by her cot if you preferred sleeping there for the night. You noticed her grimace when she saw your somber face, and you also took note of the way she hesitated to speak further; her questions of concern for your well-being held back.

She reminded you that she was there for you and began walking away, and just as if she were leaving the stage after an audition and the next contestant was up, she switched places with John. You continued to look down at your book, and when you saw the familiar worn leather boots, you tried your best to keep reading. You hadn’t even realized you were reading the same line over and over, unable to process the words on the page. But in your stubbornness, you refused to look up or acknowledge him.

“(Name).” He began, his inflection wavering.

You refused to look up or even speak for that matter.

“(Name), I’m sorry.” He kneeled down to eye level with you, tipping his head to the side in hopes of catching your gaze with him. Your eyes moved opposite of where he looked, dropping your reading facade.

“Listen I… I’ve been a fool alright.”

You scoffed in laughter, rolling your eyes. “That’s an understatement.” John was relieved to have gotten some sort of reaction from you, falling back to sit on his rear more comfortably and crossing his legs.

“I would just, really like it if you still slept with me in the tent tonight…” He went on to say.

“What for?” You finally looked at him and cocked a brow quizzically, crossing your arms over your chest defensively.

“I just wanna talk, okay? I’ve been real indecisive and I just… think this would do us some good y’know. Instead of uh, yelling at each other, and stuff…” John cleared his throat, struggling to come up with the perfect combination of words that would convey his message perfectly. Though you found his ineloquence charming. You closed your book and sent it down on your lap gently, beginning in a small nod before becoming more profuse.

“Yes, I’d like to talk.” You admitted. “No yelling.”

John offered his hand out towards you, and the way the sun hit his back made it appear as though there were some incandescent halo around his body that made him appear holy; the guardian angel you needed so badly in your time of melancholy finally being sent to you. You took his palm, being pulled to your feet by his strength.

“I love you. John.”

“I love you, too.”

Me and My Husband - Mitski

#red dead redemption 2 #red dead fandom #red dead redemption community #red dead redemption 2 x reader #writing #van der linde gang x reader #red dead fanfiction #john marston #john marston one shot #john marston x reader #John marston x reader angst #john marston x reader fluff #John marston angst #John marston fluff

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psychelis-new · 2 years

Text

pick a pile: "What do you need to leave behind"

take a breathe and choose the photo/number that calls you the most to read about what are you supposed to leave in the past in order to give birth to a new cycle of your life.

don’t take the reading too seriously. only take what resonates with you and leave the rest. remember that is a general reading and some things may not resonate with you. Also, you're in charge of your life.

(photos found on unsplash)

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1 - 2 - 3

- ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ -

pile 1

Anxiety (social anxiety/ruminating in particular) and attachments issues. Especially waiting for an answer/feedback and like... keep checking on others to see if you can grasp it. Or keep checking your phone waiting for a message reply. And immediatley read it when it arrives. You may be quite impulsive at times, start acting out of nowhere, probably overworking even when you get a rush of adrenaline going. Maybe you do this to distract your mind when doubts arise.

I'm smelling almonds now, it may mean you don't do this on purpose, your intentions are good ofc. It's just something that is stored in you (probably from a childhood/past life trauma related to emotions/lack of feedback); you may need to deal with this cause it can get difficult to live with such expectations and anxiety towards others (and how they may react and all that noise inside of your head). Focus on you the most. On doing your best. And balance your energy (I think the masculine is a bit too strong: nurture yourself). This Mercury retrogade may be talking to you in a particular way, enhancing this problem with communication and relationships/insecurities.

Yup, your feminine energy is a bit blocked now. You might be stressing a lot over emotional responses from others. But you need to learn to let go a bit, to trust, and to believe that if someone is not answering you right away, it means they may be busy not that they hate you or you have said something terrible or dumb and they don't want to have nothing to do with you anymore. Keep working on yourself, so to be able to attract what you really desire, and balance yourself better. And stop self doubting, you're worthy, keep that in your mind.

Learn to be strong and to realize your own power. Be present in yourself fully: don't let your mid wonder and take over, it is often wrong and seeing stuff as worse than itactually is. Be objective and pay attention to facts when things get overwhelming (even if it's hard). And start giving to yourself, and especially your inner child: it may have wounds you really need to take care of.

Stop hurting yourself with the overthinking, it's not worth the pain: you're the only one making yourself suffering, while you're supposed to make yourself happy.

songs: give me love | ed sheeran; burst into flames | cavale; anxiety | black eyed peas

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pile 2

You may need to let go of fear. There's probably some thoughts that are blocking you or triggering you very deeply. My heart kinda jumped out of my chest and I almost want to tear up. What is going on pile 2?

Could be related to love for some tbh, maybe there's a new love that seems too good to be true or you have never experienced love before and it's kinda scary or your'e unsure of how it'll turn out (it may also trigger you somehow).

Do you fear trying? Are you scared of someone's reaction or something's outcome (maybe a new career/self employed job you wanna try)? Of being different?

Don't worry it's all in your head. You're doing great and you are also healing yourself successfully (you still may need to work on a few things though, seen what I got. Maybe some of you may even need to start their healing journey but you know you you need to do it and you wanna try). You know it takes time and patience, you're not rushing/you won't. You're finding out so many things about yourself, how strong you are, so why are you letting fear/overthinking block you? I know from the outside it all looks clear and obvious, but when it's time to act from the inside things look worse and harder... but try. You really only need to try, to take a leap of faith and make your own reality (I almost wrote destiny, so yeah, that's a massive confirmation). Focus on the happiness, the good, your bravery, how things can (and will) go well for you, don't do what we usually do, when we focus on that small thing that is going wrong while forgetting about all the good around us literally yelling at us. Let things change, welcome that change and don't let your worries stop you. Keep giving love to yourself: you know the choice is only yours. You can decide if to stay in the same mold, or to jump where you need and feel you belong. It's a matter of taking control of your mind and its twirling, but you can do it. It won't be easy, but to have a different result, to go to a different place, you need to change what you do and how you think. And everythign here says you can. You totally can. You only need to believe and try. Things are gonna go great for you. Focus on the now, take that little step that you are missing and that separates you from success.

songs: yours to keep | jordan mackampa; with me | sum 41; bitter sweet symphony | the verve

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pile 3

You probably need to change your environment at least for a little. I keep hearing "emotional dept", maybe there are situations that are getting kinda tough right now or overwhelming. You need to put a few miles (or kms at least) between you and what is hurting you (especially who is hurting you): you deserve some peace, a time out from all that noise inside. You need to do something nice for yourself, to distract yourself especially if you're healing (doing things for us, that relax us, that make us feel good, that we enjoy like baking, painting, taking a walk in nature, meditating... you name it, it's a crucial part of healing: you don't have to work 24/7 on a real deep healing, it'll only have the opposite outcome for you. You need breaks. Even more if it's related to karmic family relationships). Do something you enjoy.

You may feel like you need to control yourself inside pretty often, to be in charge, to take care of others and be their anchor, but the truth is you need to change your point of you. You need to be in charge (and you are) of your own happiness and yourself. Only that. Trust your Guides and inner self, and start a different journey all for yourself. You may be overthinking on things that are not very important, that are just taking away your inner peace and stressing you out (maybe what others may think? Not your problem, at the end of the day).

You have been giving away a lot of you (time and effort), it's time for you to start taking back and learn how to take care of your needs, nurture yourself the way you need. Body and soul (use lotions, creams, take warm bath, go running, meditate, do yoga, work on your chakras... act on both your sides). Learn how to treat yourself if you wanna teach others how to truly show care for you too.

And keep manifesting, keep working on your dreams: no matter the noise around, you can get anywhere you want, especially if you need to really go away. You can.

Let go of this self inflicted pain, stop always being there for others: use your life experience to shine and go away from the environments that aren't for you anymore. Take this leap of faith, be more aware of all the good can be hidden for you in another place and follow your guts. A small change of view can give you a lot (in particular if you are a creative person: but anyway, changing air can be very inspiring and help you take a break from the wrong energies around you). And remember if you're waiting for the right time, it may never arrive. Start moving the focus on you and what you want now. Be your "one". Mercury retrogade is the best moment (as for travel, be a little more careful, plan accurately. Or start planning now and leave later on. But I think your Guides will take good care of you, just be sure to double check everything).

songs: be the one | dua lipa; 神樹 | huan chen yu; control | metro station

#pick a pile #pick a card #pick a card readings #pick a pile readings #pick a picture #pick a pile tarot #pick a pile reading #free tarot #intuitive readings #tarot reading #intuition #intuitive #tarotblr #pac tarot #puck a picture #pac #tarot

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a-boca-do-inferno · 5 months

Text

i decide what’s appropriate (john milton x reader) [request]

summary: (y/n) is growing tired of her boss' advances.

warnings: light angst, light fluff, a little stalking

words: 0.8k

notes: just another day of wanting to fuck that old man. enjoy <3

“Giddy up, we’re going for a ride”, his voice sounds somewhat demanding, the look on his face making the girl shiver from head to toe.

(y/n) lets out a heavy sigh as John takes her out of her thoughts. She turns to see him standing in the doorway with a wide smile. Repetitive. Things were starting to get repetitive and (y/n) didn’t have the stomach for it anymore. Could she perhaps quit the job and move out of town? Who was she kidding, in what world would John let her do such a thing? He had connections and money, she surely wasn’t getting away that easily. She couldn’t even sue the guy for his uncomfortable comments, as he was the hottest lawyer in town. Hell, John would make her pay him money for suing in the first place. That was the type of power he held. With another defeated sigh, she only complied in silence. Nothing she ever said made a difference, anyway.

John walks with her towards his car, which probably costs more money than (y/n) will ever make in her lifetime as a secretary, and swiftly opens the door for her. “After you, sweetheart.”

(y/n) hesitates. He’s been stalking her in the office for a month now, but getting into this man’s car just seems too much. She should probably run and never look back, but her feet don’t share the same opinion as they make their way into the vehicle gracefully. The girl doesn’t even have to look at John's face to know he’s got a smug smile painting his lips while he sits beside her and turns on the engine. They drive to seemingly nowhere in particular, and his conversible causes her hair to blow with the wind as he steps into the pedal without ceremony. The breeze hitting her face is nice, and for a moment she forgets her annoyance at her boss these past few weeks.

John doesn’t say a thing for quite some time, but he keeps an eye on her every now and then. He doesn’t stop at red lights and she feels slightly anxious, however, his relaxed demeanor ends up affecting her in a good way. His confidence that they could never crash somehow soothes (y/n) and the only thing in her mind now is the sound of the roaring wind in her ears. Her hair is a mess, but she doesn’t care. For a split second, she doesn’t care about anything. Her lips curve upwards at the thought.

John takes note of it and raises his brow. “Someone’s loosening up, I see.”

She only hums in response, closing her eyes and resting her head against the seat. “Yeah.”

“Your brother said you wanted to quit”, he says casually, but it’s clear he’s not pleased with the information. (y/n) thinks about punching Kevin in the face as John adds with a snort, “why didn’t you tell me?”

“You don’t exactly talk about quitting your job to your boss, Mr. Milton”, she laughs it off awkwardly, avoiding his piercing gaze.

He finds the comment funny, as he chuckles along and nods. “Call me John.”

“That’s not appropriate”, (y/n) looks down at her lap, her voice sounding more submissive than she initially intended. There’s just something about this guy.

He clicks his tongue, shaking his head slowly. “I decide what’s appropriate at my firm. Don’t you worry about that, sweetheart.”

“What else did Kevin tell you?”, she gives him a questioning look. She figured they spoke of her on occasion, as it was inevitable. Kevin had been the one to recommend her to John when she moved to New York. Everything she did would weigh on him too.

“Nothing much, really. We talk mostly about work. We’re professionals, you know?”, he grins at her knowingly, as if he had just read her mind.

(y/n) feels a shiver up her spine, but smiles shyly. “Good.”

“I told him I wanna figure you out”, he continues, parking the car in front of a fancy restaurant. Even the doors look expensive. (y/n) stares back at him with a slight frown, trying to understand what he means by that. John gets out of the car and opens her door, offering his hand. She blushes a little and accepts his help. Her knees feel weak with his proximity, his rough palm still holding hers firmly. Their faces are close when he mumbles, his hot breath hitting her mouth, “can I?”

(y/n) reckons this is the only time her words might make a difference, after all. Yet, with his dark eyes watching her every movement like a hawk, her mind goes completely blank. She feels enchanted, under a spell. Her voice comes in a pathetic whisper, “yes.”

John smirks.

#the devil's advocate #the devil's advocate x reader #john milton #john milton x reader #al pacino x reader #al pacino imagine #al pacino

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hawkinsuniversity · 2 years

Text

𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐥𝐲 𝐚 𝐠𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐠𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐭. 𝟒

series summary : when fionna brings you home one night the gallaghers are unsure of how to react, however, if there is one thing they are sure of, it is how much they each want a turn with you.

series warning : this series is going to contain extremely explicit and smutty content and is quite literally the most shameless thing you may ever read. this series is mainly going to consist of smut and content discussing poly relationships.

pairing : debbie gallagher x fem!reader

warnings : lots of swearing, arguing, oral (female receiving)

10:38 am (third person perspective)

“the fuck do you mean she gave you a blow job ian?!” lip shouted at his brother who was standing across the room from him.

“i mean she put her mouth on my dick and gave me an orgasm. i’m pretty such thats what a blow job is lip.” ian responded sarcastically while reading the back of the newspaper that had previously been sitting on the kitchen table.

“she gave you a blow job less than 24 hours after having sex with me?” lip questioned, still struggling to process the information he was being given.

“yep, pretty much.” ian responded.

“well where is she now?” lip asked as his brain was flooded with a wave of different emotions.

“wheres who?” fiona asked as she entered the kitchen to see the two brothers arguing with one another.

“y/n.” lip replied angrily.

“woah. whats your problem?” fiona inquired.

“y/n and lip had sex and then she gave me a blow job like 12 hours later.” ian said as he looked up from the newspaper.

“wait what!” fiona shouted. “y/n gave you a blowjob? i mean thats fine but i thought you were gay.” she said as she turned to face ian.

“exactly! stay in your fucking lane man” lip shouted out to his brother.

“ok first of all i am gay, and second of all sexuality is subjective.” ian replied to his hysterical siblings.

“good morning.” debbie announced as she walked into the kitchen.

“debbie can you shut the fuck up for two second please!” lip shouted. “and ian why the fuck would you let y/n blow you if you’re gay?!”

“WAIT WHAT!” debbie yelled. “y/n blew you?!”

“yes debs calm down.” ian said as he sighed.

“y/n as in the russian prostitute fiona brought home from the club?! she blew you?!”

“she had sex with lip too.” fiona then chimed in.

“WHAT!”

“debbie seriously shut the fuck up.” ian snapped. “and lip, i let her blow me because i was hard and needed something to jerk me off, ok? i’m pretty sure i’m still gay so there’s no need to freak out.”

“pretty sure?!” debbie gasped.

“woah now you don’t even know if you’re gay anymore?!” lip spat.

“no i — i didn’t mean it like that.” ian responded. “i just meant that i’m not sure how i feel about what happened yesterday. i mean, i like guys but now i’m not sure if i could like girls too.“

“are you fucking kidding me right now?!” lip replied.

“k seriously lip calm the fuck down.” ian shouted. “why are you so pissed off anyways it’s not like you actually liked her.”

“it doesn’t fucking matter ian! i still slept with her! you don’t sleep with somebody your siblings have slept with!! thats just basic fucking logic!” lip screamed.

“ok seriously you both need to calm down.” fiona jumped in. “you two head off to work i’ll handle y/n.”

“how are you gonna deal with y/n, fiona?! you have a shift at patsey’s in a half hour!” lip asked while pacing the kitchen.

“i was gonna get debbie to hangout with her today!” fiona defended.

“no. absolutely not. she can come with me to work.” lip spat refusing to compromise.

“i can hangout with y/n!” debbie offered.

“oh fuck off.” ian joked from the kitchen table.

“no seriously, i wanna get to know her! plus, i was just about to head to the mall, she can join!” debbie squealed excitedly.

“ya well thats not gonna fucking happen debs. she’s an ex prostitute with who knows what kind of issues and trauma. we don’t need debbie freaking her the fuck out right now.” lip aggressively spat.

“lip seriously it’s fine.” fiona stated bluntly. “go to work and don’t even worry about it.”

and with that fiona started pushing lip towards the front door, trying to get him out as quickly as possible so he didn’t have time to argue.

“ok whatever, i’m leaving.” ian said as he stood up from the kitchen table and left out the back door.

that left only y/n and debbie in the house together and at that exact time y/n happened to come walking down the kitchen stairs.

“hi!!!” debbie greeted the girl enthusiastically.

“hi.” y/n said back plainly.

“i’m debbie!” she introduced. “fiona, lip and ians sister!”

“ohh ya hey.” y/n responded dryly.

“so i was just about to head out to the mall. wanna come?” debbie asked excitedly.

“ya sure.” y/n replied dryly once more.

“great! let me grab my keys and then we can go!” debbie squealed in delight.

5:12pm

“come on y/n! we’ve been trying on dresses for hours!” debbie complained from the big sofa that sat in the middle of the dressing room.

“just one more!” y/n exclaimed from behind the curtain that was currently shielding her naked body.

the two girls had been shopping for hours and not only did y/n take forever but she also spent a shit ton of money.

that girl seriously needed to learn how to cut back a little bit.

“what do you think!” y/n squealed as she came out from behind the curtain wearing a silver sparkly party dress that was so short it didn’t even cover up half of her ass.

“you look amazing now can we go!” debbie said hurriedly while looking down at her cell phone.

“but you haven’t even seen it!” y/n exclaimed while walking towards debbie and lifting her chin up with her right hand so she could look at the dress.

“y/n we really don’t have ti —“ debbie started but quickly stopped talking once she saw how y/n looked in the dress.

it was beautiful. it was like the dress had been designed to look only as perfect on her.

“wow.” debbie said in shock.

“so should i get it?” y/n asked happily.

“definitely.” debbie said firmly. “how much is it?”

“like $725.” y/n responded quietly.

“725!!” debbie screamed. “holy fuck y/n we can’t afford that!”

“i know, i know! i just wanted to try it on.”

“ok well you just did so go take it off now so that we can finally leave.” debbie said back hurriedly.

y/n pouted and walked behind the curtain again to take the dress off and put her regular clothes back on.

“debbie!” she called

“yes y/n!” debbie called back from the couch.

“i need help with the zipper! can you come undo it for me!” y/n asked.

debbie sighed and stood up from her comfortable seat.

she walked behind the large curtain to find y/n with her back turned and her ass completely exposed.

debbie felt her heart beat faster and her breathing turn heavy.

before she knew was her hand was grabbing onto y/n’s ass as a slap echoed through the dressing room.

y/n let out a yelp and quickly spun around.

debbies face turned bright red as she realized what she had done and immediately started repeatedly apologizing.

as debbie was ranting on and on about how sorry she was y/n slowly started to move closer to her and cupped her right cheek with her left hand.

debbie looked down at her and immediately stopped talking.

slowly debbie moved in and started gently kissing y/n on her soft pink lips.

“mhmm” y/n moaned into the kiss and started running her hands up and down debbies clothed body.

debbie quickly pulled away from the kiss and grabbed y/n’s hands before pinning then behind her back and sucking gently on her neck.

she slowly ran her hands up the side of y/n’s thighs and pulled her dress up so it was sitting just above her waist.

she then brought her hands back down to y/n’s upper thighs and started tracing shapes on her warm skin.

she moved her hands up even more and gently grazed her thumb across the top of y/n’s clit.

y/n moaned softly as she watched debbie touch her in the mirror of the dressing room.

debbie gradually stopped sucking on y/n’s neck and crouched down to come face to face with her perfectly round and plump ass.

moving even closer to y/n’s cunt debbie licked a firm strip up of y/n’s folds.

y/n wasn’t wearing any panties and her pussy was already soaking wet.

debbie was quickly lapping at y/n’s folds before starting to suck at her clit gently.

y/n moaned softly again and reached backwards to grab onto debbies head.

debbie continued to go between sucking and licking at y/n’s pussy until she finally pushed a finger into her cunt carefully.

y/n groaned trying to keep her composer.

“shhh be quiet. we don’t want someone coming in.” debbie mumbled against y/n’s folds.

she then slipped another finger into y/n and started to kiss and caress her thighs softly.

y/n felt herself about to come undone but tried her best to keep herself together.

“its okay baby let go for me” debbie praised.

y/n continued to moan softly as she came on debbies tounge.

debbie quickly lapped up all the cum that slowly ran down y/n’s thighs before standing up again.

and all that went through debbie’s mind in that moment was : what the fuck were lip and ian gonna say.

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jaesvelvet · 2 years

Text

every cloud has a silver lining

SUMMARY ➤ there's an idiom— every cloud has a silver lining but to Jake he has you.

PAIRING ➤ sim jaeyun + gn!reader

GENRES ➤ fluff, comfort, established relationship

WORDS COUNT ➤ 1.09k words

WARNINGS ➤ reader is like cottagecore kind of person(??), mention of food, slightly mention of taylor and kanye's scandal (is that a warning?😭)

NOTES ➤ after writing this, i lowkey wanna write about how their love story began— a swiftie with a kanye's listener lmao it's a roller coaster mode

It's raining again… it’s been two weeks of raining, the weather has become cold and blue. People bring umbrellas whenever they go and the playground gets quieter since there’s no children left home due to the rainy season.

You stopped reading mid-sentence of your recent book as your ears catch a sound of doorknob being twisted– you put the hard cover book aside, fixing your sitting posture on the couch and smiling widely as a tall figure enters the house, totally covered by rain.

“You forgot your umbrella” you said, giggling as he responded by a single scoff. You make your way to your shared bedroom to give him his towel.

“Take a shower first, I’m gonna make something hot for you” you said and hand him a Tiffany blue towel.

“But you’re hotter” you roll your eyes, the never-ending tease.

“Just go!”

You felt warm, standing in front of the boiled chicken soup, you took a spoonful of the soup to taste it, a proud smile could be seen on your face as the soup tasted good for a human to eat. While serving the food on the table, you peek at the window from your living room apartment, the rain didn’t show a sign to stop, it gets heavier every second followed by a loud thunder.

Rain is a second thing making you calm– after your boyfriend of course. Everytime it’s raining you thank God for the scientific reason it made your anxiety go away. But at the same time you felt sad, your pretty flowers on the balcony. They must be annoyed getting shower everyday, and it’s been a while since you hang out on the balcony to take good care of your flowers.

“Emm! Smells good” your boyfriend enters the kitchen with his full set of his navy blue silk pajamas.

“Let’s eat it while it’s hot” you said

For a few minutes, there’s no sound in the kitchen except the sound of both of you chewing the food and the sound of spoon clunking with the bowl. Both of you enjoy the silence, after a hectic day– a moment of silence you need to rest your brain from processing anything.

“Did you have a great time today?” he asked, as if he didn’t text you for every second today.

“Yes. I finished knitting your sweatshirt!” you beamed.

You spent a week knitting a sweatshirt for him, you worried if he caught a cold from his workplace while the rainy season was going on.

“And my folklore vinyl arrived”

“Hm? You said you don’t want to buy vinyl records anymore”

“The rainy season makes me blue!” you reasoned, and he giggled at your statement.

“How about you?” you asked him, you could see his tiredness from his face.

“Like usual, working on the same thing everyday, getting yelled with no reasons by your senior and the copy machine still broken” he sighs

You smile and give a spoonful of your rice to him.

“Anyway, you still did a great job today and I’m so proud of you”

“Thank you, baby”

You noticed something. A new pattern was created due to the rainy season, both of you getting a little sensitive at the end of the day. Everyday, the two of you never miss pouring out the overwhelming feelings that have been bottled up in your body.

Staying at home is the best, but it’s been a while since you go out and visit a flower shop.

“You finished?” he asked, and you nodded. He takes the empty bowl of you and him to do the dishes.

“You want to watch Netflix?” you asked, while helping him wiping off the dirt from the wooden table.

“Not in the mood” he answered

You nod even his back is facing you. You walk towards the vinyl record player and put the folklore vinyl you bought a few days ago. The truth is, you also did not have the mood to watch anything. The heavy rain makes the weather become colder than usual, all you need is something warm.

The piano sound resonated in the room, track one from a folklore album being played from the vinyl record. The indie song fits the gloomy and sad weather out there, you turn off the lights– leaving the light from the table lamp from the side table beside the couch.

“Let’s sleep” Jake hugs you from behind, kissing your shoulder which makes you giggle while moving your body like a worm. You love his kisses but not on your shoulder and neck– a cons of dating a ticklish person like you.

“Can we lay on the couch first? I wanna hear songs first before we sleep” he didn’t say anything but dragged you towards the couch, after making both of you comfortable, Jake covered both of you with a thick blanket.

‘I guess you never know, never know

And if you wanted me, you really should've showed

And if you never bleed, you're never gonna grow

And it's alright now’

“Why did we need to hear some angsty song while we’re in love?” Jake asked, his hand naturally coming up to your hair– softly caressing it.

“Because you’re dating a swiftie” you smile sheepishly while Jake rolling his eyes.

For sure it’s an enemy to love trope for you and Jake, a swiftie date a Kanye West listener? It’s a roller coaster ride. You hated his guts as soon as he suggested you a Kanye West’s song but Jake, on the other hand, didn’t know anything about the scandal between the two famous people and he was genuinely confused when you acted cold towards him.

Long story short, he caught your heart and here we are.

“I hope the rainy season stops, it’s been awhile since we’re going on a date” Jake pout, he really misses going to the outside world with you, spending time with you and watching the sunset with you.

“Me too…” your hands slowly wrapped around his torso and turned your body towards him, leaning your head on his chest. Jake does the same thing, and kisses your head.

‘I guess you never know, never know

And it's another day waking up alone’

With Taylor Swift's soothing voice both of you slowly close your eyelids and whole body slowly relaxing from all the burdens the both of you carry during the day. Jake is pleased to say, after a tough day– cuddling with you is the best thing ever (but he still prefer Kanye’s songs rather than Taylor’s)

Well, like the idioms said; every cloud has a silver lining.

#enhypen imagines #enhypen jake #jake imagines #sim jaeyun #sim jake imagines #jake x reader #enhypen fluff #enhypen one shots #enhypen jake imagines #sim jake fluff #enhypen x reader #enhypen

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astralwaifu · 9 months

Note

Hi! Hi! Hi!!!

Remember me? It's the one who encouraged to do the genshin character compatibility trend i have been dying to do! Unfortunately, i couldn't find the person who i saw started this trend so here i am in your ask box doing this. So i guess you know how this thing works- like you send three characters to see your compatibility with, and then you send a little bit of info about yourself such as personality and hobbies. I love that trend so much and as much as i wanna stay sane, i wanna know if my favorites will actually match or vibe with me ehehehehe-

So anyways! Let's start!!!

Characters : Pantalone, Venti, and Diluc!!! My favorites!!!

Apperance (ft. Picrew) :

About me : So technically, i am currently a drained out student (and help me school starts soon), but i am studious and hardworking! My problem is, i cannot seem to focus on one topic at a time and i ended up forgetting things. I don't socialize much, yet i would always greet people with a smile. But i never had anyone else to share what i have on my mind (usually books and my own ideas) and i tend to overshare and sometimes change the topic that it gets all too confusing. I only have two hobbies, reading and listening to music. And i pretty much wanna stay indoors all the time and then be alone in a pretty, fairy-tale like place in nature sometimes. I am very much clingy, and somewhat get attached way too easily. And yes i do require headpats and cuddles because i never got any affection. And i get easily irritated and when i am pissed i get too far, sometimes. Yet i just want cuddles and affection because i am lonely, lol. Oh and i love stuffed animals and books and sweet-scented perfume as an addition. Also i have a fear of spiders, i pray at least someone can get rid of them for me. That is all ✨️✨️✨️

Author’s note: Heyya! Sorry it took a couple days, I got my nails done and can’t type as fast as before! We changed Pantalone with Welt from HSR, because for some unknown reason I can’t write him. Anywaaay, I hope you’ll enjoy this! Sending all my hugs to u. <3

Venti

I have a strong feeling that his outer persona is your inner one, so you sort of complete eachother in a way none of you really expected.

Although it would take a while to get used to his extrovert self, since you seem to be pretty much introvert, the moment you decide you are comfortable enough you’ll see a big change. Meaning - EXPECT UNENDING AFFECTION AND CUDDLES!!!

I swear Venti wouldn’t be able to keep his hands off of you - always needs to give you reassurance and to have you close to him. Would totally do the thing where he squeezes your hand three times to silently tell you he loves you.

Would show you the most beautiful views in Mondstadt, he knows every place worth seeing and knows which one will leave you absolutely breathless.

Whether you like it or not, he will sing to you all the time. You like a certain song? Expect to hear to it singed by Venti for the next two weeks, until you physically can’t listen to it anymore.

A small issue would be that he constantly need to be around people, to interact and be present, which you’ll find a little tiring. Loves to annoy you too so he could get a reaction out of you. Don’t worry tho, he will never cross your boundaries!

Overall, on a scale from one to ten, I’d give your compatibility an 8.5 .

Diluc

The moment I finished reading about you I immediately thought that Diluc is the one.

It’s just that the two of you are fairly similar, both in the way you are around others (although you are quite a pleasant presence, Diluc is just more grumpy) and in the way you share the same wish in your heart - to be loved by someone, held amd cherished despite your flaws.

And I can say that the two of you do a pretty good job at that. Main love language between you is physical touch, since both of you are touch starved. When you are around others PDA is kept to the minimum, but when the two of you are alone HE WILL BE ON YOU ALWAYS! Holding your hand absolutely everywhere you go in the Dawn Winery and around its domain, random back hugs and normal hugs, headpats whenever he sees you around the house.

Also kisses on the crown of your head and forehead (they are Diluc’s favourite form of intimacy), which make you feel so special and seen.

He will always find time for you despite his busy schedule. His favourite activity together is reading in silence next to eachother, shoulders touching, but each doinh his own thing. He is the type of person that would put your legs over his during this to help you sitt mor comfortable. You will absolutely fall asleep in his lap like that.

Carries you to bed when that happens - no one can change my mind !!!

The two of you strike me as that couple that doesn’t really fight and not because you ignore your problems. You really don’t have reasons to fight.

Did I mention you will never have to worry about bugs again? :)

He is THE MAN - 10/10 compatibility.

Welt

Loves to take care of you in any possible way he can. Mans just trying to make you feel as safe and as comfortable as he can. He loves you too much to have you feeling bad about yourself or lonely.

Indulges in all your little habits such as going rants whenever you find something you love. He’s listening to every word carefully, absorbing information. You will maybe think he doesn’t care, but in the next couple days you will find a lot of things related to your new book or idea in your room on the Astral Express.

He’s more mature and a big stand-offish, so expect cuddles only when you request them or really really need them. Doesn’t really initiate this kind of things. You will however have your hand held and head pat by him at all times.

Saved you more than once from Himeko’s bad tasting coffee.

His main love language would be quality time, you will find yourself sitting next to him anytime, anywhere, each doing his own thing.

Whenever the Astral Express stops on a new planet for a trailblazing expedition, he will take you on cute dates and a walk in the nature.

He gives me a 7 vibe. Maybe 7.5-8.

And little note to u : all of them would find you absolutely beautiful because, honestly, who wouldn’t?

#genshin impact x reader #genshin impact #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail #venti #venti x reader #diluc ragnvindr #diluc x reader #welt yang #welt x reader

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imtherain · 1 year

Text

The Difference Between There and Here

Heyo

So it’s been a holiday, right? For me it’s Christmas which means going home to the frozen wastelands my parents live in. But it’s pretty. And as one does, I got lonely being home, and I’ve been super in love with Simon “Ghost” Riley, so this happened. It is extremely self indulgent and technically not finished. But I wanted to post it anyway, so I chopped it up, glued it back together, and made this little thing out of it.

Maybe one day I’ll finish it in the way I originally planned, but for now, this is how it is.

Warnings: Christmas talk, travel, forbidden relationship, snow, family, no pancakes, threat of bad tea. Some vague allusions to naughty things. idk it’s pretty tame.

Anywho

~~~

“You got any plans for Christmas, hen?” Soap asked. I was laying on the couch in the rec room, feet over one armrest, face to the army grade ceiling. It wasn’t often we got leave around a holiday, but the stars had aligned, and we’d been cleared to go our separate ways, go home, go anywhere we wanted.

“I’m going to go home, I think. Haven’t been back in what? Three years?” I was staring at the places where the tiles of the ceiling connected. My parents didn’t understand where I was or what I did for a job. They just knew I worked in England for the government. They didn’t even know which government employed me. Even so, I was kind enough to not explain how closely I walked with death so they didn’t worry about me anymore than necessary.

“I bet they’ll be happy to see you,” Soap smiled. “I’m going to see me mam too,”

“I’ll bring you treats from my mom if you promise to bring me back some from yours,” I grinned back.

“Deal,” He said.

“What’s got you all smilie,” Ghost entered the rec room from behind the couch, so I couldn’t see the tall man until he put his hands on the back of the couch above me.

“Just talking about Christmas,” Soap said. “Say, you got any plans LT?”

“No,” Was all he said as a reply. I looked up at him and while he glanced down at me briefly, he kept his eyes on Soap.

“Wanna come home with me?” Soap asked, batting his eyes like a teenage girl. I could almost hear Ghost’s eyes roll.

“Negative,” Ghost said.

“Oh come on, my mam would love to have another mouth to feed, I was gonna ask y/n, but she’s heading home to her own family,” Soap said it as if it was such a crime for me to go to my own family.

“I’m sorry to abandon you so heartlessly,” I was grinning though. Soap sighed dramatically.

“Well, I’m going to go pack up my shit, I’m leaving in a few hours,” Soap stood and stretched, his shirt riding up since he hadn’t had it tucked in properly.

“Merry Christmas!” I called after him.

“Don’t worry, I’ll call you,” Soap made a cheesy phone gesture as he waved at us. He was gone just like that.

“You really not doing anything, Ghost?” I asked, laying my head back to look at him. His eyes were tracing my face in that way that made my cheeks get hot.

“Affirmative,” He said, just staring at me. I frowned slightly.

“There anywhere you’d like to go?” I asked.

“Not really,” He leaned down on the back of the couch and reached out to poke me in the cheek. “I’ll just be here, do some paperwork, read,”

“You want some company for that?” I teased him. He moved to run the last knuckle of his finger along my cheek. Without realizing it I leaned into the touch.

“No, you’ve got your own plans,” His eyes were trained on the spot his finger held against my cheek. I hummed at him.

“I don’t want you to be alone on Christmas,” I told him.

“Wouldn’t be the first time, likely won’t be the last,” He drew his hand back, but his eyes remained on my face.

“You could come home with me,” I told him. “It’s nothing fancy, just my parents and me. No big crazy parties or giant family gatherings. Just the three of us and some shitty movies and way too much food.”

“That sounds nice,” Ghost said. “But no,”

“Why not?”

“Don’t want to scare your mother,” He deflected.

“Oh please,” I rolled my eyes at him. Ghost was smiling behind his fabric mask, just barely. I could tell by the way his eyes softened.

“I’ll be fine here,” Ghost said again.

“I’ll be better if you came with me,” I told him. This made him look away. We hadn’t talked about feelings yet. But there was always something there in the air between us. Nevermind the nights we found ourselves with nothing between us at all.

“You best be careful how you say that,” I could hear the smirk in his voice. “Might give me the wrong idea,”

“You offering to come keep my bed warm tonight then?” I asked with a smirk of my own.

“Officially, I have to say no,”

“Hasn’t stopped you before,” I reminded him with a cheeky grin. He hummed slightly. “But really, I’m leaving in the morning, 0800, if you change your mind.” I stood up and stretched like Soap had. His eyes followed the movement, a hungry glint visible above his mask.

I winked at him before heading towards my bunk, hoping he’d follow me, but knowing he likely would not.

I spent most of the night packing my gear and digging out my civilian stuff. I had a separate phone, keys to my car back home, some various other keys, exactly two sets of clothes I could never wear on base, and my stash of cash that I kept for just this sort of situation.

I went to bed, duffle packed up and waiting by the door. I settled into the bunk and sort of wished Simon had followed me to bed, if only just to say goodbye.

I woke up at the same time as always, a habit from living with the 141 for so long now. I finished my morning routine easily enough, but imagine my surprise when I returned to my room to find a tall shadow waiting for me at my door, his duffle bag over his shoulder.

“Good morning,” I said, eyebrow raised. He watched me open my door.

“Plane leaves soon,” Ghost said from the doorway.

“It does,” I agreed. I picked up my own bag and came back out into the hall. “You joining me LT?”

“Figured you needed someone to keep an eye on you,” He shrugged. I scoffed at him.

“Sure,” But I shut my door and started heading for the hanger, Ghost following me like a shadow.

It was a long journey home.

Across an ocean to the East Coast of the US. Another flight to the Twin Cities and a puddle jumper that Ghost barely fit in to get to the center of Wisconsin. The state I grew up in. The state I had lived in for most of my life.

I called my mom after we’d picked up my banana yellow pickup truck.

“Hey mom,” I smiled as my call was answered. “Guess who’s in town?”

“Baby!” My mom’s voice came over the radio. “Are you really?”

“Yup, and we’re about 2 hours away.”

“‘We’re’?” She asked.

“Yeah, I’m bringing someone home for Christmas,” I said. I could feel Ghost staring at me from the passenger seat, but I chose to ignore him, keeping my eyes on the road.

“Ooooh?” My mom was excited and reverted to a twelve year old girl. “Who is it? Is it a boyyy?”

“He is a boy I’m pretty sure,” I teased. “And you’re on the speakers, so be careful what you say,”

“Is this that guy you were telling me about? The one with the big hands?”

“MOM I SAID YOU WERE ON SPEAKER,” I felt my face flame as Ghost suppressed a laugh.

“Sorry, sorry,” She laughed back. I rolled my eyes because I knew she did it on purpose. “Do we need to get anything for you both? I can send your dad to town,”

“Oh no, we’re good. And we mostly need showers and sleep because we’ve been going since 5am England time,” I told her.

“I still need that cup of tea,” Ghost said.

“And we need a cup of tea,” I repeated even though I knew my mom could hear him.

“You sound lovely,” My mom cooed. “We look forward to meeting you,”

“Likewise,” He replied.

“Well, we’ll be there soon, just wanted to give you a heads up. Oh and don’t worry about getting the room ready or anything, I can do it when we get home.”

“Ok, well, drive safe! We’re so excited to see you baby!”

“Love you,” I said.

“Love you too,” She replied before I hung up.

“Sorry, she’s very excitable,” I laughed, hoping he didn’t make a big deal out of her comment.

“Big hands, huh?” Of course not.

“They match your big head,” I stuck my tongue out at him and he chuckled, crossing his arms and settling back into the seat. “Are you seriously going to sleep more? You’re going to be up all night,”

“We sharing a bed?” I was surprised by this question.

“Um, probably, there’s just the one bed in the guest room. It’s a king sized bed if that helps, or I can sleep on the couch,” I told him, unsure if he wanted to sleep together or not.

“If you’re in bed with me, I’ll sleep just fine,” He said and yet again, my ears grew hot. Somehow it was worse now that we were off base. There was less pretense maybe, but either way, his effect on me hadn’t gotten any weaker.

“You’re a romantic, Ghost,” I shot back.

“You going to introduce me to your mom as ‘Ghost’?” He asked.

“I do call you that most often,” I said. “Though they are likely going to ask you a ton of questions anyway, maybe calling you Simon would be easier,”

“That’ll do,” He agreed, settling again.

“Simon?” I asked, tasting his name as though it were new to me. He made a hmm sound in acknowledgement. “Thank you for coming with me,”

He turned his face to me then and his eyes, while tired, were solid and sure as they traced my profile. I glanced at him and gave him a small smile. He nodded once and shifted so that his arm rested on the center console with mine. It made me brave enough to slide my fingers into his. I half expected him to pull away, but instead, he just brushed his thumb along my palm a few times before he drifted off into that light sleep he always seemed to have waiting for him behind his eyelids.

The rest of the drive was uneventful. Just a quiet ride, the hum of my tires, Simon’s soft breathing. If I didn’t have to drive, it would have been easy to just fade into the moment and disappear.

As we got closer to home, the snow got deeper, the speed limit got slower, and the trees got taller. Like driving straight into the past.

Simon finally stirred when we drove through town.

“Good morning, sleepy head,” I squeezed his hand. He looked at me for a moment as if he’d forgotten where we were. “Need anything, love?” I asked carefully. I wondered if he’d had a bad dream, or one of the ones you couldn’t quite remember, but held onto you after you woke.

“No,” He sat up and took his hand from me. I was just happy to have had it for as long as I’d been able to. It was nice that for once, no one was watching us.

“We’re actually almost there, like 15 more minutes, I promise,” I said.

“Good,” He looked out the window, taking in the small town. There was a gas station, a bar, a restaurant. An old motel eight that had been converted into something forest themed. The high school.

“That’s where I went to school,” I told him. “I did prom, the whole thing, wore a purple dress.” I smiled at the memory. “And never in a million years did I think I’d end up doing what we do.”

“Do you regret it?”

“Do you?” I looked at him for a moment while we waited for the light to change.

“I didn’t have much else to do,” He said.

“I worked a lot of shitty jobs,” I said. “Did a lot of stuff that anyone could do. But then I ended up in the right place at the right time, and suddenly I didn’t need to wear dresses anymore,”

“I don’t think I’ve seen you in a dress,” Simon mused.

“Would you want to?” He shrugged. The light turned and we headed away from town, out into the growing darkness of the woods.

“I bet you’re pretty in a dress,” He said as if he had had to think about it for a moment.

“As if I’m not pretty otherwise,” I snorted.

“Last time I compliment you,” He shot back.

“I was teasing you,” I told him. “You know, like couples do,” the term felt weird in my mouth, but good.

“What else do couples do?”

“Oh you know, hold hands, kiss each other, cuddle? I don’t know, haven’t dated anyone… probably ever now that I think about it.” I told him. “Haven’t you dated someone before?”

“No,” He said.

“Come on really? Never? I bet you were really popular with the ladies when you were in school,”

“Not particularly,” He said.

“Then how the fuck did you get so adept with your mouth?” I asked before I could think about it. He actually chuckled at that.

“You might be surprised to know, you can have sex with someone without dating them,” He explained. “Besides, you were easy to figure out,”

“I should be offended,” I shook my head. “Speaking of sex, probably don’t be too crude around my parents, they still think I’m fifteen,”

“Somehow I doubt that,” Simon said.

“Please just behave,” I said.

“No promises,” I could hear the grin in his voice.

The lights of town were long gone, and the sun had faded beyond the trees. The clock said it was only 5pm, but this far north, that was almost full dark already. I turned down the next road that cut through the forest and then there it was. The house I grew up in.

The front porch was all lit up with big hanging bulbs, which were covered in the most recent snowfall. The pine trees that towered over the house were blanketed in white as well, the yard almost waist deep in snow. I parked my truck in the driveway and just stared for a long moment. I could see the lights on inside the house and the hint of movement.

“You good, Angel?” The callsign made me look at him.

“Just, it’s been a long time,” I told him. He shuffled a bit and pulled off his balaclava. My eyes grew wide. “Why hello handsome,” He ran his fingers through his blond hair, trying to bring back the waves that his mask had crushed.

“Figured there would be less questions,” He said.

I smiled at him and reached out to touch his face. There were less scars there than most people thought. The rumors usually say he wore the mask to hide deformity. But really, he was quite handsome, fair skin, strong nose, strong jaw. And those lovely eyes I always loved to see. One eyebrow was split with an old scar, and it was clear his nose had been broken more than once. I always told him he was perfect, even though I knew he very rarely believed me.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” I told him. Simon leaned into my hand and kissed my palm.

“I’ll do it for you,” He said and I swear my heart stopped. I ran my fingers over his hair to adjust a few more of his waves before giving a big sigh.

“Well, we can’t sit out here all night,” I said as if that decided it. I turned off the truck and hopped out before my anxiety decided it would be better to pull out and drive all the way back to England.

Simon was behind me when I opened the door.

My parents’ dogs both started barking, not knowing who I was right away. I smiled seeing them. One was a big lab, Zeva, and one a small mix of fluffy breeds I couldn’t remember, who sometimes answered to Taya.

“Ok, ok! It’s just me,” I told them, and they both were happy to sniff me and ask for pets. I was able to rub Zeva’s head once before they were shooed by my mom. I felt my throat pinch seeing her. She looked the same as I remembered her, maybe a little older, hair a little grayer. I hugged her without even putting my bag down.

“It’s so good to have you home,” She said into my shoulder. I was taller than her normally, but with my boots on, more so. When she finally let me go she caught sight of Simon, who was still standing in the doorway, back straight.

“Oh, yeah, this is Simon,” I said, stepping farther into the house, dropping my bag. Trying not to make a big deal out of the fact I’d brought a man home, nevermind all the other things I was hiding from her about what I did for a living. About how closely I walked with death.

I swallowed all the things that rose in my throat to choke me. I had faced worse things than my mother.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Simon,” My mother smiled at him.

“You too, ma’am,” He extended his hand and she took it in both of hers.

“Ma’am? No need to be so formal,” She laughed again, just happy to have us. He nodded and I watched him with a small smile. I hadn’t really thought too much on how this might feel for him. I knew his family hadn’t been good and that he had nothing even close to it anymore. That was part of why I asked him to come with me.

My dad appeared from the living room. In his prime, he’d been six foot two, so Simon wasn’t quite so big compared to him. I hugged him and introductions were made.

“Well, come sit,” My mom said, ushering us into the living room. As soon as we sat down, Taya, the smaller of the two dogs, decided it was time to run around the living room, including across and over Simon since he was in the normal spot she ran to get to the back of the couch. He cursed under his breath as she did it but I just laughed at him.

“Sorry, she’s a ball of energy,” I told him. I was sure my parents couldn’t tell the difference in his face, as it was outwardly stoic. But I could tell he didn’t mind.

“It’s fine,” He said. “Just never seen a dog so small,”

“Really?” I asked, surprised.

“That one looks more my speed,” He nodded to Zeva who was laying happily on the rug, just vibing.

“That’s Zeva and she’s a princess,” I told him, quite seriously.

“Takes after you then,” He teased and I elbowed him. Zeva, having heard her name (and title) came over and set her head in my lap, asking for pets. I gave her lots.

“How was the flight?” My mom asked.

“Long, we were in the air for almost 12 hours,” I groaned. “But we’re here now, and I can already hear the bed calling my name,” I yawned as though my body needed to agree.

“No! You just got here,” My mom complained.

“I’m not going to bed just yet, don’t worry.” I told her. “And I’m pretty sure I owe someone a decent cup of tea,” I patted Simon’s thigh and he narrowed his eyes at me, just slightly.

“I can make it,” My mom said, about to stand, but I was quicker.

“No, no, he’s picky,” I said, heading into the kitchen. But a devious thought entered my mind.

“So, Simon, tell us about yourself,” My dad said. I could see the couch where Simon sat from the kitchen, but my parents couldn’t see me. I got the kettle out and filled it, setting it onto the stove top. I dug through the tea chest that had been in the same spot in the kitchen since I was about eight.

I could hear Simon try to answer my parents' questions as vaguely as he could. It was strange to me hearing him talk about himself. Normally, he just ignored questions, but he was trapped by a mix of social obligation and the fact he had literally nowhere to run. It was a whole side of him I hadn’t had the pleasure of knowing until now.

When I thought he’d suffered enough, I hit some buttons on the microwave, knowing that Simon would kill me if I microwaved his tea.

“Bloody hell,” He muttered standing. “Angel, you better not be microwaving my tea,” He warned, coming for me in the kitchen.

“Told you he was picky,” I said loud enough for my parents to laugh. He stopped next to me when he realized I hadn’t actually microwaved anything. “Like I would fuck up your tea,” I whispered. He narrowed his eyes at me.

“You’ll pay for that,” He said softly. I bumped my shoulder into him.

“What kind of tea?” I asked, pointing him to the tea chest. He picked one while the kettle began to whistle. “Anyone else want some?” I called into the living room. My dad said no, no surprise. My mom said sure. So I went to the cupboard and grabbed mugs, Simon put the tea bags in and poured the water in. I grabbed the milk and added it to his. I added honey to mine and my moms and Simon just rolled his eyes at me, because that ‘wasn’t how you made tea’.

Simon relaxed with tea in hand.

Though it might have been the fact that I could field most questions now that I was sitting between him and my parents. Eventually, 9 pm rolled around and my parents headed off to bed. Goodnights, I love yous, we’re happy you’re homes.

“How are you doing, love?” I asked Simon as the house stilled for the night. His eyes were tired, but his face was soft. He put his hand on my thigh.

“Tired,” He said.

“Does that mean you won’t stay up and watch Family Fued with me?” I smiled when Simon rolled his eyes at me.

“You won’t make it ten more minutes,” He said.

“Since I didn’t get to nap all the way here, I suppose you’re right,” I scooted closer to him so that I could swing my legs across his lap. “And we both need a shower,”

“Could always save water and shower together,” His mouth twitched towards a smirk.

“That sounds lovely, but we won’t both fit in the shower here,” I took his hand in mine and traced his knuckles with my finger. “Wanna know a secret?”

“Go on,” He said.

“I’m looking forward to sleeping with you without having to worry about getting caught,” I brought his hand up to my mouth and kissed his knuckles.

“Hmm,” He smiled at me, a sight I so rarely got to see unobstructed.

“And I won’t lie, I’m enjoying seeing your face,” I admitted, scooting just a little bit closer, hoping he’d let me get close enough.

“Don’t get used to it, Angel,” He almost purred.

“Why do you get to use my callsign and I don’t get to use yours?” I mused, fingers tracing along his jaw. I followed one light scar from near his ear down the side of his neck. He tipped his head for my fingers to trace back along his throat.

“Habit,” He admitted. “You should go get cleaned up,”

“You saying I smell bad, LT?” I almost whispered it.

“Say my name,”

“Simon,” I murmured. He smirked at that.

“Say it again,”

“Simon,” I repeated, smirking back. My fingers moved to grab a handful of his shirt.

“Again,”

“Simon,” I pulled him close enough that his name was a prayer against his lips.

“Again,” His breath mixed with mine.

“Simon,” And I tugged him that last bit closer to cover his mouth with mine.

~~~

Inspiration Pictures:

My mom’s porch/Yard being pretty

Princess Zeva

And Taya (who was begging me for pizza)

[Masterlist]

#simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley x you #simon ‘ghost’ riley #ghost x reader #christmas #christmas fic #shameless self insert #doggo #snow

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domripley · 6 months

Text

Left to Face This Alone - 6

pairing: rhea ripley x reader; mentions judgement day x reader; eventual liv morgan x reader

warning: dubcon, stockholm syndrome, mommy kink, physical abuse, fingering, ruined orgasm.

summary: you don’t listen to rhea and she’s not having it anymore.

It had been three weeks since you had last worked, and a part of you felt anxious. You were scheduled to do a few interviews and you knew that Rhea was looking for any excuse to hurt. You made sure you didn’t look at Anyone for too long or even talk to them for longer than she liked. You were walking on eggshells now, making sure to not make Rhea angry or upset in the slightest.

“When is your next interview?” Rhea asked as she got dressed for her match.

“Right after Finn’s match, then I’ll be sitting in your locker room like you told me.” you said quietly, trying your best to maintain eye contact with her. You weren’t sure if that would make her angry, but you really didn’t want to find out.

“Good girl,” she praised, reaching her hand out to caress your cheek. You flinched, but tried to play it off - silently hoping she wouldn’t point it out. “When we get to the hotel room, I wanna make you feel good for being such a good girl.”

You held back the urge to throw up - you hated the fact that she was being this way towards you. A part of you wanted to quit and go back to your hometown, knowing that your family would take you in.

“But please don’t come to the interview, I need to focus on my job.” you said, but as soon as it left your mouth, you regretted it.

“Excuse you?” Rhea snapped, grabbing your throat roughly. “If I want to be at your next interview, I will. Or should I remind you that I can and will make you quit your job faster than you can say ‘no’. Don’t fucking try me.”

When she let go of your neck, you took a deep breath. “I- I’m sorry. Please don’t make me quit. I love this job and- and, if you want to be at the interview, you can.”

She smiled softly, “Good girl. Who are you interviewing?”

You whispered, “…Liv…”

You watched as Rhea’s smile faded into a glare - she knew the two of you were really close friends and she hated it. “What time? I’ll be there.”

“It’s after Dom vs Cody.” you said, and she nodded.

Rhea walked away, leaving you unsure of what to do. You were afraid that she was going to start something with Liv during the interview. For the next two hours of Raw, you couldn’t get your mind off of Liv or Rhea. You missed Liv, but with Rhea constantly watching you, you weren’t able to hangout with her. Hell, you weren’t even able to contact her without Rhea reading your text messages.

——

When the cameras landed on you, you took a deep breath. Smiling, you spoke up, “Hello, I’m here with one half of the women’s tag team champions, Liv Morgan!”

You were doing so well and like usual, your chemistry with Liv was great. Flinching a little when Rhea appeared in your field of vision. You tried your best to stay focused on Liv and what she was saying, but the way Rhea was staring you down began to make things harder.

After the interview, Liv came up closer to you and asked, “Are you okay? You’ve barely been working and I’m just really worried about you. Are you able to come out for drinks tonight with me and Bianca?”

You took a deep breath, knowing that Rhea was going to be angry. “Yeah, send me the address and I’ll come by.”

Liv tried her best to give you a convincing smile, knowing that you actively ignored the rest of what she said. But it soon faded as she watched as fear washed over your face as Rhea approached the two of you. You began to make yourself smaller, hoping that Rhea wasn’t going to ask questions.

Glaring at Liv, Rhea snapped, “Go away.”

Liv shook her head, stepping up to Rhea. “Don’t think you can push me around, Rhea. You don’t think people are talking? Ever since (Your Name) and you have gotten closer she’s been sporting so many bruises.”

Rhea smirked, “What can I say, she loves rough sex. Now go.”

As soon as Liv was out of sight, Rhea grabbed your arm roughly. “What did you tell her? Huh?” she snapped.

You tried to push her away, but her grip on your arm was too strong. “N-No, Mommy. I didn’t say anything. People can see the bruises, I’m sorry, I should be wearing long sleeves until they heal.”

“You’re going to quit tonight,” Rhea stated as a matter of fact. “And you will be moving in with me. Do you understand?”

“No,” you snapped, eyes widening once you realized what you said.

“No? Did you say no to me?” she asked, almost in disbelief. “Get in my dressing room now and we’re going to discuss this after my match.”

You rushed past her, doing as she said. You knew you were in for it and you didn’t want to make things worse for you. As soon as you got to her dressing room, you jumped at your phone going off. When you pulled it out of your pocket, you were relieved that it was just Liv sending you the address. She had let you know that she was already on the way there.

You were going to go - but as you changed into comfortable clothes, you knew it wasn’t going to end well. You knew Rhea would catch on and she was going to hurt you, but for the past few weeks all you’ve been doing is staying around her. You needed human interaction that wasn’t involving someone actively hurting you.

You texted her back, letting her know that you were leaving now. Rushing out the door, you realized that the bar wasn’t as far as you thought. Walking down the street, you had a plan to go back to the arena after Rhea’s match and post-match interview. That way she would never know that you went out without telling her.

When you reached the bar, you went in. It was busy, but not overly packed. Liv was sitting at a table in the corner with both Bianca and Becky. She called you over, greeting you with a smile. You smiled back at her as you made your way towards their table

“(Your Name)! We’ve missed you!” Bianca called out, getting out of the seat to hug you. You winced, earning a concerned look from Becky.

“I missed you guys too,” you said as you sat down next to Liv. “I’m sorry, I’ve been busy with my personal life and I’ve been so sick.”

You knew you were a bad liar, but you hoped they’d at least believe that. You weren’t sure as to why you were protecting Rhea, but you knew you needed to. Dom broke your trust and as much as you trusted your friends, that fear was in the back of your mind again.

The first hour was great, having a few drinks and catching up with everyone. You were having too much fun and you had realized that Raw was done for the night when Rhea had texted you.

Rhea: Where the fuck are you?

Rhea: Answer your fucking phone. Now.

Rhea: That’s it, I’m coming to find you now.

You put your phone down, trying to calm down but as your anxiety grew, you couldn’t relax. Taking a sip of your drink, you soon focused back on the conversation.

An hour later and there still was no sign of Rhea, but as soon as Damian and Finn walked, you began to panic. You weren’t sure if they knew what Rhea was doing to you or if they even cared.

Making eye contact with Damian as he said something to Finn that you couldn’t make out, you knew you were screwed. But when Finn pulled out his phone, you began to panic even more. When your phone went off again, you knew you weren’t overthinking.

Rhea: I’m on my way to that fucking bar you’re at.

You took a deep breath, jumping a little when Liv wrapped her arm around you. You quickly looked over to see both Finn and Damian glaring at you.

“So, (Your Name), what’s going on with you and Rhea?” Becky asked, and you shook her head.

“We’re- We’re… I don't know,” you said quietly, unsure of how to respond to that. Rhea had only ever called you hers, but you still weren’t sure if that meant you were dating. It made you a little sad, but you shook the thought away as someone pulled you out of the booth by your arm.

“We’re leaving, say goodnight to your friends.” Rhea snapped, but Bianca and Becky both got up out of their seats.

“She’s not going anywhere.” Liv said, causing Rhea to roll her eyes.

Glaring at you, Rhea asked, “Are you staying here or coming back to our hotel room? Because I just want to spend time with you before we’ve got to sleep.”

You looked between everyone - a part of you wanted to believe her, to believe that she had no intentions to hurt you. The other part of you knew better, so you spoke up. “I’m staying here.”

To your surprise, Rhea let go of you. Walking away without a word, Liv rubbed at your arm. You sighed, not saying anything to the others as you watched Rhea storm out of the bar. You knew you should have gone with her - considering all she wanted was for you to come back with her. You felt as if you hurt Rhea and that was something you never wanted to do. Did she hurt you over and over - yes - but she didn’t deserve it. After contemplating things for a good twenty minutes, you spoke up. “I think I’m gonna head out, I’m super tired.” you said, which wasn’t a complete lie.

“Oh okay,” Liv nodded, giving you a small smile. “Do you want me to drive you back to your hotel?”

“No it’s okay, it’s not that far of a walk. I promise.” you said, standing up from your seat.

Liv got up after you, giving you a small smile. “Okay. Just… if you need anything, please don’t hesitate to text me or even call. I promise that I’ll come get you.”

“Thank you, I’ll keep that in mind.” you said before making your way to the door.

As you passed Finn and Damian, you could have sworn you heard Finn whisper ‘Dead’. You turned to look at them, but dropped it as you finally reached the door. You took a deep breath, knowing as soon as you got to the hotel room, Rhea was going to hurt you.

As you turned the corner, you were surprised to see Rhea still sitting in the rental. You rushed towards the car, begging her to let you in. She glared at you, not bothering to roll her window down.

“Please, I’m sorry. Please let me in,” you cried out. You weren’t sure what washed over you, but you were needing her to forgive you.

Finally, Rhea rolled down her window. Glaring at you, Rhea sighed. “You chose them over me. You left when I told you not to go anywhere.”

“I should have chosen you, Mommy.” You whispered, head hanging in defeat.

“Yeah, you should have, because I had no plans of hurting you tonight, actually. But you’ve royally fucked yourself over with that one.” she said, turning the car on. “Now get in the car.”

——

The car ride was quiet, but that didn’t help as you stayed on the edge of your seat. You looked out of your window, confused as to why she passed the hotel.

“Wh- Where are we going?” you asked, turning your head to look at Rhea.

You watched the smirk on Rhea’s face grow. “We’re making a detour.”

You went to ask what she meant by that, but as she pulled into a dark parking lot, you began to panic. Rhea parked the car and turned it off before she pushed her seat back.

“You’re going to quit tomorrow,” Rhea stated, unbuckling her belt. She reached over and grabbed you by the hair. Pulling as hard as she could, you were surprised that she wasn’t pulling your hair out. “Do you understand me?!”

Using her other hand to punch you, she laughed as you cried out. You covered your eye, knowing that you’d have a bruise tomorrow. “Do you fucking understand me? You’re not going to come in tomorrow. Instead, you’re going to call in and quit. If you don’t, I’m going to hurt you really bad.”

“You’ve already hurt me in ways I never thought of, what more can you possibly do?” you cried out as she finally let go of your hair.

Rhea slapped you across the face with the back of her hand, not once, but twice. You cried out, knowing that if you did go into work tomorrow, everyone would start talking. You didn’t want that for Rhea and you knew you wouldn’t be able to lie well.

You whispered in defeat, “I’ll quit.”

Rhea began to smirk menacingly, “What was that? Can you repeat that?”

“I said: I’m going to quit tomorrow.” you sighed, knowing that you really had no choice in the matter. Rhea was going to get you to quit no matter what, so you thought that this was a lot easier than anything she was going to do to you to get you to quit.

“Good girl. You know what? I’ve decided I’m not going to hurt you tonight.” she stated, and you breathed a sigh of relief.

“Th- Thank you,” you whispered, relieved that she wasn’t going to hurt you.

She turned the car back on, giving you a small smile before driving out of the parking lot. You began to relax, and as soon as the two of you got back to the hotel room, you were ready for bed.

Getting into your pajamas, you crawled into the bed beside Rhea, who was scrolling through Twitter on her phone. Locking her phone and setting it on the nightstand, she turned her attention to you. Leaning in, she began to kiss you on your neck. You tried your best to relax, not wanting to make her angry.

“Hand me your phone, I’m keeping it near me tonight.” she stated, and you handed it to her with no hesitation. “Now, take your shirt off for me,” Rhea said.

You did as you were told and as soon as it was on the floor, Rhea attached her mouth to your nipple. Playing with the other one lightly, you whimpered as she bit your nipple lightly.

“Mommy, please,” you begged, squeezing your legs shut as you tried to get some friction.

Pulling off your nipple, Rhea looked at you. “Pull your shorts and underwear down.”

You did as you were told, pulling them down halfway down your thighs. Running her hand down from your chest to your pussy. Rubbing your clit, Rhea kept her eyes glued on you.

“See what happens when you’re a good girl, I make you feel good.” Rhea smiled, bringing her hand down. She slipped two fingers into you, fucking them in and out at a teasing pace. You closed your eyes, trying your best to focus on her fingers, but all you could think about was if Rhea was going to check your phone later. You had been texting Liv a lot more recently and you were usually deleting the texts, but you realized you had forgotten to do it this last time.

“Please, please mommy,” you begged as Rhea wrapped her lips around your nipple once more. Sucking as hard as she could. “Please, m’need you to go faster, need it.”

Rhea did just that, fucking you with her fingers as fast as she could. You were growing closer to your orgasm and you were beginning to feel gross. Rhea was constantly hurting you and now that she was acting a little soft with you, you were ready to give her what she wanted.

“You’re going to come for me, aren’t you?” she asked.

You nodded frantically, but as soon as you went over the edge, Rhea pulled her fingers out of you.

“You won’t be coming tonight, but, come and put your mouth to good use while I check who you’ve been texting.”

#my writing #mine #dark au #dark rhea

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yellowkitkieran · 11 months

Text

Rumors (Kieran Tierney)

Masterlist

Word Count: 2.2k

Summary: Kieran doesn’t tell you about his set-in-stone transfer to Newcastle and you can’t trust him.

Kieran Tierney set to leave Arsenal- exclusive interviews reveal all

To be honest, you aren't sure you remember where you read it from first. You've dived deep into the dredges of the football tabloids, the rabbit hole swallowing you up without a second thought. The deeper you go, the darker it gets, and the harder it becomes to read articles as tears blur your vision.

Arsenal's next captain? More like their next sale

Your worst fears are coming to fruition. Everything you've worked for, gone. Your entire future, that family you thought you'd planned with the love of your life? Gone up in smoke over the course of an hour as you find credible sources that back up the sketchy claims you'd stumbled across.

It hurts more this way, finding out second hand, than hearing it all from Kieran's own mouth.

Say goodbye to London- Newcastle comes knocking for Arsenal's talented bench

Each word hits you like a stone. Kieran hasn't mentioned a word of this to you. Up until an hour ago, as far as you knew Kieran was set to renew his contract with the gunners for at least another season. Just last week, Kieran came home bouncing on his toes over how well talks had gone at the club. Now, you have every reason to believe it had all just been an act.

From the beginning, Kieran has ensured that honesty is the cornerstone of your relationship. After a history of exes that left you in the dark, Kieran was a breath of fresh air. He always communicates and includes you in planning his time. Hell, if he was ten minutes late coming home from training, he’d send you a text to let you know he was behind so you didn’t worry.

You find yourself asking again and again what has fundamentally changed that he would keep this from you. Are you not good enough anymore? Does he not want to stay in London to be close to you? You can't up and move, your job doesn't allow for that sort of flexibility. And you've spoken about your desire to help provide for your future family; you don't want to rely on Kieran for everything. When you landed your dream position he was over the moon for you- was that an act as well? Everything you've worked towards, all for nothing.

"Ohhhh my darlinggggg! Your lover boy is home-" Kieran stops short when he sees you curled up on the sofa, his smile fading as he takes in your red-rimmed eyes and splotchy skin. "Sweetheart? What's wrong?"

"You tell me." Your voice is rough and foreign to your own ears. Makes sense, considering how raw your throat is. You’re surprised you can get any words out at all; the tightness in your chest only gets worse now that Kieran is standing in front of you.

Visually, he isn’t any different than he was a few hours ago when he left. Sure, his hair is washed and he’s changed his clothes, but that’s standard after a training day. But looking at him now, you feel as if you don’t know the man in front of you. It sickens you to think that he would deliberately keep something this life changing from you.

Kieran shakes his head, immediately coming over and sitting at your feet. You pull your knees to your chest, not wanting him to touch you for fear that you'll crumble. "I dinnae understand- I have no idea what's happened? Please tell me my love, what's got you so worked up?"

While Kieran's voice is soft, you can't help wondering if he already knows the answer. How can he not? Did he really think he could not say a word about a move and keep you from finding out until he was gone? If he did, he severely underestimated you.

"You're leaving, that's what's wrong." You spit the words like venom, wishing to wound him as painfully as he's wounded you by keeping secrets. "You didn't even think to tell me? Newcastle?! Fucking six hours away- you didn't wanna tell me?" You're angry, not thinking rationally as your vision clouds with hot tears. "Fuck you, Kieran. Honestly, fuck you! How could you?"

Kieran rakes a shaky hand through his hair. He rocks back on his heels, wounded and reeling. "I was gonna tell you-"

"When?! The day you pack up and move?" You're desperate now, on your feet and looming over him. You can't see straight. A storm has been brewing for hours and you're ready to explode.

"Nothing is set in stone yet," he says as if it will help. It doesn't matter though, the damage is done. He stretches a hand towards you but you step out of his reach, his fingers closing helplessly around air. "Mo ghràdh, I didn't want you to be worried before I knew it was for sure."

You shake your head, needing a second to detach. The nickname you used to cherish lands hollow now, sounding like an insult instead of a sweet reminder of his love. "Don't you dare call me that name. Don't try being kind now when you've broken my heart, Kieran Tierney." His face crumbles but you can't bring yourself to care. He's hurt you more than your cold tone could hurt him. "How dare you keep this from me! Did you think I was too fragile or weak to handle this? Did you think I'd pack up and leave at the first sign of something going wrong? We planned our future!"

"And that future didn't include me going to a smaller team like Newcastle!"

The room falls silent in the wake of Kieran's outburst. Finally, some emotion from him that isn't shame. Something you can latch onto and run with. Proof that this is killing him the same way it is killing you.

"Do you truly think so little of me," you start in a dangerously even voice, "that you think I wouldn't love you if you left Arsenal? Do you think a paycheck, that any of this-" you gesture to the house around you, decorated with expensive curtains and fancy decor you paid someone to pick out- "matters more to me than my love for you? That if we had to pack up and move to an apartment, I wouldn't love you anymore?"

"That's not at all what I'm saying." Desperation creeps into Kieran's voice as he begins to pace, trainers scuffing on the hardwood every few steps. "I'm saying that I dinnae want to worry you if something isn't serious? Sure, it's been in the works for a month or so-" your stomach sinks, expression souring but Kieran doesn't notice- "but I thought I had more time. I was going to tell you over dinner tonight, because Arteta said-"

"Arteta said what? What did he say exactly," you interrupt, aware of how childish you're being but not possessing a care in the world. Your fingers tingle from how hard you grip your phone, the weight of Kieran's betrayal causing you to shake with rage.

Kieran has the audacity to let his shoulders fall, as if he's pained by what he's about to say. "Arteta said that they're likely to sell me. He told me he wants me to develop more and maybe one day come home, but he doesn't want me wasting away on a bench. I'd get playtime at Newcastle," Kieran notes with hope, thinking that might soothe things over like putting a plaster on a scraped knee. "They'd make me a regular starter. It's all in my contract."

Your laugh comes out as shrill as nails on a chalkboard. "Oh, regular playtime yeah? Starting every game, huh? Well that's good, cause without me around you'll need to keep yourself busy."

The house falls silent. A spring cold snap presses at the windows, but even the heating doesn't dare break the quiet. You stare hard at Kieran, hoping he finally understands how badly he's hurt you.

"You- what? What do you mean, without you around? You don't mean… you're not breaking up with me." He says it as a statement, like he has the power to trap you here and not let you leave.

"I need a break Kieran, that's what I mean. I don't know if I trust you anymore-"

"Because I didn't tell you about a potential move?!" Kieran's laugh is humorless as he rakes a hand through his hair. "Rumors come out every day- am I supposed to inform you each time a club comes asking about me? If I had known it was that big of an issue I would've told you, but I didn't realize you were gonna hate me for keeping it to myself until I knew for sure!"

"Of course it's an issue Kieran! You're moving across the country, who knows when I'll be able to see you- I can't just quit my job and follow you! I'll be stuck here, you'll be there-"

"You're not coming with me?"

Kieran looks as if you've just shattered his dreams. His hands are limp at his sides and his mouth hangs open like a fish as he struggles to find any sort of excuse. But you don't want to hear it. You don't want apologies or sweet words that he has carefully selected to force you to fold. All you've ever wanted is Kieran, in every sense of the word; now, you're not sure you'll ever believe you have all of him again.

"How am I ever meant to trust you again, Kieran?" Your voice is soft, devoid of the anger it held a few moments ago. You know what you have to do, no matter how much it'll hurt.

"Because I love you. I didn't think- I was only trying to protect you. Please, just stay and we can work all this out."

"No, Kieran." You shake your head. Kieran steps forward, you step backwards. "I'm sorry, but you did this to yourself. If you had been honest with me from the start, maybe it would've been different."

"Let me talk to Arteta, maybe I don't need to go." He's grasping at straws and you both know it. Nothing can change your mind once it's been made up. "If I stay, would you stay? Please, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I didn't mean for any of this, I swear I was going to tell you tonight."

"I can't let you do that either. This is your career… if Newcastle is going to provide you with the stage you need to succeed, then that's where you need to go. I shouldn't hold you back."

Turning on your heel, you head for the hallway. Kieran follows you upstairs like a lost puppy. He sits on your bed as you pack your most important things into a suitcase, intending to come back at a different time for the rest of it. Each shirt and pair of socks you pack away feels like tearing out a piece of your heart. You go to grab the ratty, faded green celtic shorts you love sleeping in and stop yourself, leaving them in the drawer for Kieran. They're not yours, not anymore.

"Where will you go," Kieran asks flatly around the gravel in his throat. He's trying so hard not to cry, to ensure the last image you have of him isn't a teary one.

"Probably to Chloe's. I'll be okay, so you don't need to worry about me. I'll come back for the rest of my things in a couple days, when I've had time to process."

"Okay."

You pause in the doorway, glancing at Kieran over your shoulder. He hangs his head in his hands, his body shaking with the effort of holding back his sobs.

"I hope you do great at Newcastle," you murmur, unable to leave him with such a sad memory. You smile when he looks up, trying your best to make it warm and sincere. Despite your initial rage and what he probably thinks, you don't want to leave. The problem is, you respect yourself too much to stay in a relationship where your partner clearly doesn't share the same basic values as you do.

"I love you."

You sigh, gathering the last bits of your courage to offer Kieran a nod. "I know you do. I love you too. Unfortunately… that's not all I need from a relationship."

Your grip on your bag is tight as you take the steps slowly. You pause at the front door, taking one more look around the house you'd thought of as home for the past year. You'll miss it. You'll miss late night snuggles on the overly firm leather sofa, neither of you watching whatever film you'd put on. You'll miss Kieran's laughter ringing through the kitchen as you try desperately to fix the meal you'd burned. You'll miss sitting on the deck with him on warm summer afternoons on the rare days you both had spare time.

You'll miss all the memories this house contains, but you'll miss the man living there most.

#kieran tierney #kieran tierney fanfiction #kieran tierney fanfic #kieran tierney fic #kieran tierney imagine #kieran tierney fantasy #jac writes #forbidden fruit #arsenal fc

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secretwriterpp · 1 year

Text

Interrogation 3

Downhill

Summary: Frankie Morales x Reader (mention of the other TF boys)

You and Frankie are caught off guard at the safe house. The aftermath of what happened leads you to a very dark place

Warnings for this specific chapter: PTSD, hyper sexualisation, drug use leading to dub-con (kinda) alcool, swearing. A little smut, I guess 😅

{Masterlist} {Chapter 4}

“Can’t wait to see you guys!”

Santi hung up and looked at Frankie who was sitting at the kitchen table.

« The Millers, they are coming back soon! » he said smiling at the good news.

Frankie simply replied « good! » and took another bite of his peanut butter toast.

You went down the stairs , straight to the pantry to grab the box of captain crunch.

« Hey, good morning! Will and Ben are coming home in a few days. » Pope said waiting for a positive reaction.

You turned around to look at him, purposely avoiding to look at Frankie and replied « good »

Santiago took a deep breath, he wasn’t a man of patience, he wasn’t the most understanding guy, he didn’t have a well develop empathy. He tried to have compassion for what happened to the two of you, dammit , he did have some, but he was fucking done with this ambience.

“Fuck, you two are insufferable! It’s unbearable to breath the same air as you! Do something about it , fuck, talk to each other , talk to a shrink , go outside, I don’t fucking care , but do something. I can’t tolerate this dreading atmosphere anymore” he grabbed his jacket and stormed outside to take a walk away from the house.

Frankie was looking at you , you couldn’t see him cause he was behind you, but you could feel his gaze linger on you.

“I’m sor.” He started, but you didn’t let him finish.

“Santi is right … and I’m doing something about it. I’m going out tonight. I’m gonna… I’m gonna go to the movies , alone , I need time to think.”

You left your bowl of cereal on the counter and went back to your room. You stayed there for the most part of the day, reading.

————///————

It was finally night and you were ready to make your plan come to life. You spotted the perfect place to find a man, you bought a new flirty dress in a local boutique and you came up with a lie so the boys would not worry about you.

“Bye guys , see you after the movies” you left without letting them ask any questions.

Santi looked at Frankie with question marks in his eyes. “What?”

“She told me she was going to the movies , alone. She needs to think.” Frankie shrugged his shoulders not knowing what to add when Santi wasn’t satisfied with his answer. That’s all he knew about your plans . At least you had plans , maybe it meant you felt better.

————///————

The moment you entered the bar, you felt a couple of guys looking at you. This was going to be easy, the outfit and the makeup were doing their job. First you needed a drink. You stopped by the bar and ordered a few shots and drank them quickly. The guy next to you watched you gulped down the content of the three glasses with wide eyes.

“Damn girl, someone you need to forget?”

“Yeah… something like that” you replied winking at him.

He was handsome, maybe a little bit older than you. He didn’t look dangerous, you could probably neutralize him easily, that was an important criteria. You smiled at him and asked

“Wanna drink one more with me?”

He did and just like that you had him all wrapped around your finger. ~that was easy~

“Hey pretty girl . You want to dance with me?”

“Yes , come on! ” you grabbed his hand and guided him to the dance floor.

“Oh , I meant to ask , what’s your name sweetheart ?” he asked.

“That’s not important” you replied

“Oh come on babygirl , my name is Dave , what’s yours?” ~Oh fuck no~ you thought.

“Ooohh, I’m sorry, I changed my mind.” You turned around and started walking away from the guy.

“Hey come on! What’s your problem?”He asked following you.

“Nothing , it’s me, not you” you said trying to get rid of him.

He grabbed your wrist and pulled you against him:

“don’t be a fucking tease! Come on.”

You quickly released yourself from his grip and pushed him away.

“I’m not interested anymore , so back off” you told him with a cold tone. He flipped you off and walked across the room and left the bar.

Well, that wasn’t going as smoothly as you thought it would. You walked toward the bar and ordered a few more shots. Liquid courage could not hurt.

The second guy you talked with was drunk or high , or both. He was good looking, kind of. You found him on the dance floor. You started dancing with him and he took the bait right away. He tried to grab your ass while dancing, but you pushed his hands away. “No touching , I’m the boss tonight okay , you do as I say” he nodded enthusiastically, obviously excited at the idea of playing this little game with you. It took only a few minutes to lure him outside the bar.

“where’s your car?” You asked him.

He fumbled through the parking lot and opened the door of an old rusted red truck.

“Get in the backseat” you told him bluntly.

He obliged and you followed him into his truck, closing the door behind you.

“Take your pants off” you ordered him. He didn’t lose a second and dropped his pants to his ankles, followed by his boxers. His erection was a disappointment, but you didn’t really care. You took a condom from your purse and gave it to him so he could wrap himself up.

« Woah, someone is eager » he said , you ignored his comment.

“Okay, listen, this is serious” He looked at you and nodded making a small military salute. You rolled your eyes “You can’t touch me , you can’t kiss me, understood?” He nodded again and asked « so you’re just using me? I’m okay with that » he smirked.

You lifted your ass from the seat to take your panties off and secured them inside your purse. You took a deep breath before straddling him. He was looking so fucking ecstatic, it was ridiculous , it almost turned you off. The alcool was going through your veins and made the experience less weird than it really was. You took another deep breath and took his cock in your hand, pumping him a little before guiding him to your entrance. He gasped at the feeling of you on his tip.

« Awww fuck. I wanna see your tits » he moaned into your ear.

« Shut up… » you said while sliding yourself down on his dick. You were holding his wrists above his head on the headrest , riding him with no real conviction. ~it’s not working , I feel nothing~ you thought. Tears were starting to form at the corner of your eyes when you felt him shake under you. He was moaning loudly in your ear, you couldn’t bare to listen to the sound. You lifted yourself off of him and bolted out of his truck without saying anything. ~fuck this was the dumbest thing I ever did~

You went straight back to the bar, directly into the ladies room. You locked yourself up in a stall and started crying. ~ fuck this isn’t working. I still feel empty! That’s all I will ever feel now?~

After a while, when there was no more tears coming out of you and when you managed to control your breathing, you got out of the stall and took a look at yourself in the mirror. You rearranged your hair and corrected your makeup. ~I look like shit~

You needed something, anything to make you feel numb. You went back to the bar and asked the bartender for another round of shots. You took the 3 down in seconds and then you asked him :

« Who should I talk to if I want something stronger? »

The bartender gave you a name and he told you to go behind the bar, in the back alley and talk to the guy in the white car. You followed his instruction and got there as fast as you could. The guy wasn’t in his car , he was standing next to it , having a conversation with another guy who looked just like him. Tall, blond guys, blue eyes, brothers. Not as gorgeous as the Millers , but pretty decent. You walked towards them with determination in your steps.

« Can we help you? » the one with a green shirt asked.

« Yes, I’m looking for something to get this night … more interesting » you were already pretty far gone with all the shots you took , but it wasn’t enough.

« What’s your poison baby? We got everything. » the one in a black tshirt replied. He smirked at the way you weren’t standing straight.

« Surprise me…baby » you replied imitating his tone.

« What about coke? Wanna try it » he assumed you never had coke and he was right.

« Let’s do it » you said , he looked at his brother with a smile.

« Alright , one line of coke for the lady. Do you mind if we join you? » he asked playfully.

« The more the merrier » you replied even if it didn’t really make sense.

He prepped the lines on a small mirror , using the hood of his car as a table. The green shirt brother snorted his line first and then black tshirt did. You felt nervous when it was your turn , not really knowing how to do this. You bent down over the mirror and sniffed the line in one shot . It felt like it hurt your brain at first. It only took a few minutes before you felt the rush in your veins. You felt lighter and happier.

« How are you feeling pretty lady? » green one asked taking your waist between his hands, bringing you closer to his chest.

« Euphoric! » you answered him while touching his forearms.

« You know we can have even more fun if you let us » black tshirt whispered into your right ear.

You didn’t even see where he was coming from. You couldn’t really concentrate on anything. The rush of dopamine streaming down your veins was guiding your next moves. You took Green’s face between your hands and kissed him hard. Black tshirt was behind you kissing and biting at your neck. You felt your dress being pulled over your head and the rest was a blur, a messy mix of moans and hands all over your body. The next time you were able to concentrate for a second , one of the brother was between your legs, pounding into you on top of the hood of the white car. You didn’t stop him ~ that’s why I was here for in the first place~ You lost track of time and events again. Four hands roaming all over your naked body, faces switching in front of you, the brothers fucking you, taking turns, one after the other, again and again. The idea of what was happening was exhilarating, but you really felt nothing.

« That line was free for you pretty lady. You can come back whenever you want. » Green said kissing your neck while black tshirt was putting his pants back on.

When your high was finally coming down and when you gained enough balance to get off the hood of their car, you took your dress from the ground and kissed one of the brothers before leaving to the front of the bar. A few clients were still there, drunk, shouting and laughing, completely unaware of what happened just behind the building. Black tshirt ran behind you, you didn’t see him do it but he slipped something inside your purse.

« You come back anytime you want pretty lady. Free lines for you, always » you laughed at his comment.

It was time to go home but you couldn’t remember the address of the safe house…

« Fuck! »

You had no choice , you couldn’t walk , it was too far and you were too fucked up to do it anyway, so you texted Santi. You waited for what felt like an eternity before resigning yourself to text Frankie , you didn’t really have a choice. His answer came back almost instantly.

————///————

Frankie wasn’t sleeping. He was waiting for you. It was pass 2 am and you were not home yet. He was almost having an anxiety attack, thinking maybe the guys who sent Dave a week ago found you when your text came in. PING.

Frankie was relieved , but he was also pissed when he saw your text

- What’s the address to the safe house ?

He replied

-Where the fuck are you?

You didn’t answer right away, it got him even more angry at you.

- The address

He clenched his jaw

-Where are you? I’m coming to get you

Once again, it took you so long to reply. He was nervous that something happened to you.

-No. The ADDRESS Frankie

« Fuck! » he gave up and sent you the address.

He waited for you sitting in the dark. He didn’t unlock the door , he wanted to see if you were going to struggle to open it. A few minutes later, he saw the lights of a car approaching the house and then he saw you walk towards the door. At first glance , in the dark, you looked like you were okay. He shifted forward resting his elbows on his knees. When you reached the door he heard you crash into it hard. He got up fast to listen closer to the door. He could hear you mutter some profanities. You must be drunk, so you lied about the movies , he already knew, but now it was obvious. You didn’t make any noise for a while and then he could hear you sobbing. He unlocked and opened the door and you fell on your back on the entrance carpet.

« Y/n ! Are you okay? »

You were sobbing hard and you couldn’t control your voice. You almost screamed at him.

« I fucked up! I fucked everyone and , and , and , I drank and did all the lines. »

He wasn’t sure what you were trying to say. You didn’t make any sense. He helped you get up and took you to the couch. You were looking bad , hair disheveled, makeup smeared, your dress was plastered with dirt. He could see scratches and bruises on your exposed skin. We’re they from tonight or from last week, he wondered.

« Where the fuck did you go? And don’t you fucking lie about going to the movies »

You were crying even harder , sobbing like a child who lost her favorite toy. You were pretty far gone, he could tell, your body couldn’t stand straight even if you were seated , he had to hold you up against the arm of the couch.

« At the bar »

He paused « you drank a lot , anything else? »

« Coke »

He raised his eyebrows, surprised at your revelation and then he was pissed « What the fuck y/n. That’s the lines you were talking about? »

« Yeah »

« Are you feeling okay? You should drink something » he got up, pushed your body in the corner of the couch so you wouldn’t fall and walked to the sink.

« I’m broke » you cried again « I’m ruined Frankie »

He walked back to you with a tall glass of water. You drank it up fast.

« No you’re not. Don’t say that. What did you mean by you fucked everyone? » that part of your chaotic speech was scaring him the most.

« You don’t love me anymore » you cried out

« That’s not true » he said « I will always love you » he whispered. It was tough for him to see you cry, he wanted to help up, but he didn’t know how.

« He was supposed to kill me…Cat » you blurted, chocking at his nickname. He knew what you meant, but he wasn’t ready to have this conversation, not like this, not in the state you were in.

« Fuck him! I don’t want him to be the last» you took a deep breath, tears still running down your face. «You don’t want to help me, so I fucked 4 random dudes, or 3, can’t remember »

« Oh » he didn’t know what to say to that. He felt jealousy and anger grow inside his chest, but he knew you were already suffering enough so he didn’t say anything. He just took you in his arms and held you there until you fell asleep. His chin was resting on your head, he felt guilty for not « helping you » like you wanted him to. Felt guilty for the choices you made instead of getting real help. Again, it was all his fault, from the moment he let himself get duck taped to that chair to this moment.

Next morning you woke up in your bed , in a fresh pj , a glass of water and tylenol waiting for you on the bedside table. Your headache was bad and your mouth was dry. ~ what the fuck did I do?~

{Chapter 4}

Tag list: @rosaliedepp

#frankie morales x reader #frankie morales #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #Santiago Garcia #triple frontier #triple frontier imagines

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