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#why is this only hard for me…how tf is everyone else able to read and remember and understand this much??
transmechanicus · 1 year
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“I’ll be fine i just need to uhhhhhhh idk kill” but like…what if i did haha
#my stuff#dear diary and the several thousand mfs who can see it. Despite arguably good academic performance today feels like a bad day#bc i skipped lab to take a nap#and i feel lonely and incapable of connecting more than superficially with my classmates#like i can talk to them and i do and we get along well but i never…hang out w em#or at least not as much as they seem to without me#it’s not a malicious thing i think a huge part of it is groups of ppl living or working in the same space#and i’m in a different lab building than a lot of ppl#idk…struggling to find anything that sparks joy. unable to see the future with optimism#it’s just day after day of Job where i’ll beat myself up on weekends if i don’t do Even More Work#bc that’s the nature of grad school. always homework or literature review to do like i give a shit abt the latter#i don’t care what other people are doing i don’t wanna obsessively comb through journals to make sure i’m doing Brand New Shit#i want it to stop#i don’t want to read anymore. i don’t wanna have to worry about my job outside of work.#i want to cry and scream and#like i don’t wanna quit after i worked so hard to get here#i don’t wanna wuss out#but i’m always tired. i’m never rested or relaxed or truly enjoying myself#why is this only hard for me…how tf is everyone else able to read and remember and understand this much??#like yeah maybe i should be on adhd meds but those are fuckin spensive and a pain in the ass to get#i’m tired of being tough#i want to curl into a ball and be told it’s going to be okay and that i can rest and have it not be a lie or a half measure
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bluesidez · 9 days
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OKAY I HAD TO HIT YOU W THIS BC I NEED THIS TO COME TRUE 🗣🗣‼️‼️
AcademicRival!Miguel x AcademicRival!reader
where they will do quite literally ANYTHING (legally) POSSIBLE to one up each other.
whether their petty rivalry began in high school or first year of uni/college, IDC- but they absolutely despise each other.
and!!! at some point down the track, they forgot why they were beefing in the first place, only for it to start stemming from a place of 'jealousy' (yk how sometimes jealousy is actually feelings of romantic interest in disguise,, yeah, that) and it gets to the point where they are quite literally making it all their friends' problem bc of it.
like i can imagine reader drinking something that Miguel sees and Miguel going 'i need to have this all the time and sell it out so reader can never have any' and Peter is like '???', or reader finding out Miguel got a certain mark and goes 'nobody speak to me for a month i have to understand everything about quantum physics before that smug asshole opens his mouth' and Jess is like '??? just kiss, fym??'
and then they finally have a moment where they have no choice but to rely on each other- whether Miguel's car breaks down on the side of the road reader happens to drive by and she takes him to his, or if reader desperately needs help in a situation and immediately calls him bc she knows he'll pick up bc she needs scary dog privileges and thats HIM so then they end up having a moment of reflection together with either super fluffy smut or absolute debauchery and fluffy aftercare i totally dont mind either way.
IDK do you know what i mean??? 🫣🫢🤭
anyway LY BLUE-BLUE, thank yew for letting me ramble on 🤍🩵
Are you asking me to write this? 🧐 (I shall add it to the pending ideas list just for you 🐰🩵)
I wrote that as a reply as soon as you sent it, but now I have more ideas that I wanna yap about to go along with this.
SO!! You already have a rivals, enemies to lovers trope going on. What better way to make it even more fun than to add the stoic x chatty dynamic???
Like I’m imagining the reader and Miguel first meeting in middle or high school. He’s a transfer student that’s immediately making the top grades and people are like where tf did he come from?? Reader doesn’t really think anything of it, she just carries on with her school life, chatting away (and getting in on the gossip about Miguel).
It’s not until he ends up in the same class with reader one semester (probably in high school) that reader is finally able to be in close contact with him. He’s so quiet and a little boring, but there’s always random girls coming in and out of the classroom to attempt to chat to him.
They’re always bringing snacks or sweets for him. He always turns them down with a “No thank you. I don’t like chocolate.” type of response. (What he thinks to be polite and cordial)
The guys in the class think he’s a huge jerk. The girls in the class still fond over him. You think he’s an oddball, a weirdo. But you really have no solid information to justify it.
It’s not until one day that the teacher asks this obscure question that he pisses you off. (I havent thought of a weird question yet tho). Everyone else has given crude or stupid answers, riling each other up and joking. You raise your head to give the most out-of-the-box, yet plausible answer that leaves the teacher impressed and the class laughing in shock. Miguel scoffs and debunks it so fast, that you start to feel like one of his rejected groupies. If you thought the laughter for your answer was loud, the laughter for his sounds like the crowd in a football stadium.
You’re embarrassed but you don’t really show it. You just brush it off and joke with everyone else like usual.
Then, one of the class’s first huge tests come. You’re gunning for the number 1 spot although you figure it won’t be too hard with half of the room being class clowns and the other half not giving af. You read over the material once and already have a good grasp on it, so you joke around with everyone else. There’s rap battles and TT routines. You guys even manage to get the teacher in on some of them. From the front of the room, you can see Miguel glancing back at you with such a sour look on his face. Wtf was his deal??
Test day finally comes. You’re the first to turn yours in with a smug smile on your face. You even take a nap until the next bell.
You’re on cloud nine for about a good week. Although, every time you open your mouth in class, Miguel looks like he woke up on the wrong side of the bed.
Then, the time came for the teacher to hand out the papers. He was pretty theatrical and loved to announce who got the highest score.
You were gearing up for him to say your name. And you don’t know of you’re crazy, but you’re certain your mom didn’t put “Miguel O’Hara” on your school registration form.
You frown as you come back to reality, watching as teacher handed him is paper. From your seat, you can see the bright red 100 in the corner, a smiley face to adorn it.
Then the teacher hands you your paper. A 99.5. Just 0.5 points from a perfect score. And what you got points taken off for is something so ridiculous that you could scream.
You can see him in your peripheral as you chat with the other students about the answers. Just as you discuss your silly mistake you take a small look at him. He has a faint smirk on his face, as if to laugh at your downfall.
From then on, you decide that it’s a war.
[and obviously, the story would travel with them as they grow. Once they’re adults, I can imagine Miguel to still be this same stoic, yet more approachable person who has had a ROSTER of hookups and a reader who’s still so flirty and chatty, yet can’t find a good partner to save their life. The dynamic of him knowing exactly how to make reader feel good verses reader being overwhelmed for once would be sooooo good]
What do you think Lexie-bun?? 🥸
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time-is-restored · 11 months
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btw this might be me swinging a bat at a hornets nest but like. absolutely none of my disappointment from the tl finale comes from ship baiting or any relationships that didn’t happen (though to be clear, i think the tedbecca fake outs were meanspirited and served no narrative purpose - in noted contrast to the season's earlier jamiekeeley fakeouts, for example, which were explicitly there to demonstrate jamie's growth + maturity)
tedpendant is a really fun concept for me, and i LOVE the characterisation + thematic potential there!
but as someone who personally resonated with a lot of ted’s struggles, the idea that ted could leave richmond so… seamlessly, for lack of a better word, really doesn’t sit right with me. the thesis of the shows entire first season - assuming it can be said to have only one - was about how everyone needs the love and support of a community, whether that comes in the flavour of someone who hypes u tf up or someone who will relentlessly call u on ur shit (or, as happened quite frequently, both!).
rebecca, roy, jamie are the clearest examples as the characters with the most screentime: they were all deeply isolated and disconnected from the people around them, and that was making them miserable. the connections they made with the team, the vulnerability they finally allowed themselves to express (the ghost banishing ceremony comes to mind!), and them going on to want *more* out of their life are what made their arcs about *progression* rather than *regression*. without that clear theme of compassion + community inspiring positive growth in everyone who encounters it, there is, frankly, no season one.
my personal favourite scene from season one comes right after michelle walks away from ted, when they’ve agreed to get divorced. ted sits down on the bench looking gutted, and a little shell shocked - and beard sits down with him. hands him the drink, and they sit there together. silent, but together. to me, that scene is an implicit promise from the episode, to the audience: ‘it’ll be okay. it’s going to be hard, but ted isn’t alone, and his friends won’t leave him behind.’
it also makes it clear to the audience that ted isn’t the saintly-giver-of-grace who needs nothing in return, as one might assume on first brush, but rather that he’s Also struggling with his own shit (as is everyone, always, in real life!) and he has something he needs from the people around him too.
and looking at the text of s3, and the conclusion to his arc in the finale, i just don’t believe that he got it. he wasn’t just sad that he was leaving (which would be understandable!), he was completely closed off. unresponsive to the people around him reaching out, borderline confused as to why they were trying so hard!
(side note, while i completely respect the read of ted and trents last interaction being rather rude + ooc on ted’s part, i personally read a different motive into it. for me, it was more like… he didn’t understand where trents enthusiasm was coming from? like, he read that as trent being too invested in what other people think of him, and responded in a way that he hoped would emphasise that ted doesn’t *need* to laugh at everything trent wrote, bc trent Already Knows that he’s done something really cool and kickass, and he shouldn’t value anyone else’s reactions above that. basically, based on his demeanour in the episode, i genuinely don’t think it would’ve even occurred to him that trent was more invested in HIS reaction than he would’ve been with anyone else.)
again, looking purely at the text, the show had already established that ted has really strong depressive + avoidant tendencies, as well as panic attacks (largely triggered by his fear of not being ‘good enough’ in various roles, ie: a father). we saw one area he was able to calm HIMSELF abt these fears (worry for henry, which is a Hell of a choice considering the ending…), but in literally every other heightened moment, he had to rely on his support system to help him make the choices that he WANTED to make, rather than ones inspired by avoidance and fear (ie: confronting michelle abt jake, talking to his mum abt why she was visiting + his dads death).
and to be clear, this is a GOOD THING! we’re not supposed to go through life alone, no matter how bad OR well we’re doing. rebecca and keeleys friendship isn’t worth less for all the scenes where they’re both in good places. if anything, the opposite is true - it’s lovely that they both have someone who want to celebrate the achievements in their life!
and fuck it, we’re sure as hell not supposed to go through life with exactly one (1) person whom we expect to fulfill ALL of our emotional needs at all times either! like, im sure i don’t need to labour my point here, but tying everything to one (1) person in ur life doesn’t make u any less isolated than if u were going it completely alone, whether it’s a family member, a friend, or a partner. i won’t pretend to know the first thing abt what it’s like to be a parent, but i don’t think it’s unreasonable to say that no parent would be at their best if they had absolutely no support/camaraderie/general love provided to them from Anyone other than their child.
so when ted is SPECIFICALLY shown to be in a bad place, over and over again (did he come to terms w his fear to be close to henry overnight???????), and then removed from his community? of COURSE the audience is left feeling unsettled, and like the rug has been pulled out from under them. there was no time in this finale dedicated to how ted would still be in contact with anyone from richmond. no promises of visits, or phone calls - fuck, nothing about emails!! according to the text, we might as well assume this is a clean break (and the maybe-dream-sequence does Fuck All to assure us otherwise. if ted doesn’t go to beards wedding, what WOULD he go to????). and since the show has ALSO completely failed to give us even an IMPLICATION of who/what ted’s support system would be in kansas, there’s… a reasonable argument to be made that this is It for ted. that, after two seasons doing NOTHING but attesting otherwise, the audience is supposed to suddenly believe that ted can (and SHOULD!) pull himself up by his bootstraps, and cope entirely on his own.
that, to me, is a betrayal of the show’s premise. we were promised a show about how, no matter how dark things may get, none of the characters would be left to struggle alone. and then they ended the show with ted alone.
i don’t know. i guess if i had to give this post a tldr; if anyone has any gen fic/meta/Literally Anything in the pipeline, i would absolutely love to be tagged/directed towards it. i’ll be endeavouring to write something myself, as well, but it might take a while before i can return to my WIP, lol.
#this is the most measured version of this post i was capable of fghjskdjhgfdgjhsfd#the least measured one is just the aromantic flag with the ‘we are going to beat u to death’ meme overlaid#look ik this is hardly impartial wrt very small + insular communities like nuclear families#but its fucking impossible to go into media analysis and not bring Anything from ur real life in there w u#so im trying to forgive myself for being a little hashtag Vulnerable + Opinionated on main#in the spirit of what this show could’ve been lol#if not here then where etc etc#Ted lasso spoilers#Ted lasso meta#Ted lasso critical#also just to be clear here im being dead serious abt that last point#im spiritually doing the jamie run to demonstrate to u all how badly i want gen shit#please. p l e a s e .#okay wait last ramble here but. this is also why the lack of information we got on trent was so crushing to me#like ur telling me this man went through the incredibly painful + harrowing process of breaking out of his (comfortable! safe) shell +#cynical journalist persona. came out to someone VERY important in his life. and has done nothing but face the music wrt acknowleding#his past mistakes + endeavouring to be better and kinder. and we never get to know if he has ANY support through all that? at all?#is he dating? what's his family situation like? does he have full custody? any friends from work? any friends period?????#like i can should must and will die on the beard + roy + higgins + colins are trents best friends hill but#its like the premise of the show stopped mattering just in time for him to be left in a legitimately depressing limbo#like 'yes everyone needs love + support bc life is rlly hard. but we're tired of making a show abt that so This Is All Ur Getting#+ screw anyone's personal life that u didn't already see in s1. You Know Enough.'#anyway i love u all this is a very silly show and im gonna go play t.o.t.k for a few hours o/ <3
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freemindedspirit · 10 months
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Jk is the DF, he awakened first and was able to accept his connection with more ease compared to his tf. Jk believes in fate and always believed he could possibly find that special person whom he would just know was made for him. There’s so much in his behavior since 2018 that shows he’s been longing for his tf even though during those years he had no idea what it was. Many emotions were mixed up. He has already crossed paths with his tf in 3D and that began his awakening to the tf connection. You can’t and won’t consciously know you have a tf until after meeting them in 3D only then will you be able to understand. This is how real tf connections work and tf are very very rare but since it became a trend online everyone is thinking they have one
More than a trend, it has also become extremely sensationalized, and its meaning has been mixed with the typical, heteronormative, amatonormative ideas of romance.I agree many people think they are going to meet their twin flame, because they are lonely and it is being sold to them as the remedy against loneliness, the "only love" which could "cure" them from it.
From the energy i get, his TF is also someone who believes in fate, the Lovers and Four of Wands come out quite a lot when i ask them about their view of the world, or it comes out naturally in their readings. I still dont agree on the DF/DM labels.There is literally no reason why from the outside we could tell someone lean into one or the other side.Also, if the energies really are fluid, then it makes no sense to say the "DF" is aware before the "DM", because these terms will be exchanged at one point or another of their lifetime.These terms are just labels we use because, as always, we have a hard time understanding relationships outside of a binary system.
When i ask, it is usually ambiguous wether they have met yet or not.
I also disagree on the "has to meet in 3D" part. It has not been the case for me,nor for at least a few people I know.Actually, from what I have read, there is at least two main ways to live this twin flame journey.There are the people who meet out of nowhere, which triggers a major growth, and which tends to end up in chaser/runner dynamics and to separate indefinitely.The other type experience yearning and awakenings before the meeting, and are usually familiar with the concept of twin flames upon meeting.These people tend to have an even harder life than the first ones.And when say harder, i mean much much harder.Traumas all around, repetitively.These people are a bit more likely to have permanent union.I INSIST, the purpose of twin flame journeys is NOT permanent union, it is growth and learning major lessons.Twin flames are a gift as much as they are poison, it is all on the dosage and your personal sensitivities.
Also, it's hard to call someone else experiences the " real" deal when it comes to tf journeys, knowing there is literally no way you would know it if you arent them ??Like you guys seem SOOOO confident about it, it seems like there is five people here who know JK's relationship more than himself.
Should i just make a post about TF so we can clear this up ?
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emonaculate · 3 years
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Streamer!Eren headcanons
❥ AU: Modern!AU
❥ Genre: Fluff
❥ Rating: Anyone can read
❥ Pairings: Streamer!Eren x Black!Reader
❥ Author Note: Ive been having the biggest brain rot about streamer!eren cause i just feel in my bones, it would be perfect for him so here are some head canons.
inspired by @sleepysnk
Eren would play any game that peaks his interest, but gets the most views when he plays any horror game, minecraft, or among us.
Its mainly due to how serious he gets when he rages over losing/dying or getting a jump scare.
"SON OF A BITCH! WHERE THE FUCK DID THAT ZOMBIE EVEN COME FROM?"
"Eren babe, not so loud."
"Sorry beautiful."
There are tons of video compilations dedicated to you walking in to shush him
His fans ADORE you
Most of them are baffled that Eren is in an interracial relationship but quickly grow used it after seeing your interactions
He often answers questions surrounding your relationship without invading what you want to keep private.
He would 100% let you sit in his lap whilst streaming
His views always rise when you are there, people just like seeing the adorable banter and romance
Everyone can tell how much he loves you
Literally he will visibly soften whenever you enter his line of view
Demands kisses whenever you enter or leave his "office"
If you ever miss a kiss, he will take a break from his stream and track you down
Plays with Jean, Connie, and Armin often
Plays with you too and gets super overprotective if anyone kills you in a game.
Once the entire gang played Among Us together and Eren went completely batshit after finding out Reiner and Bertholdt were the imposters that killed you.
The next round he is the imposter.
"And I took that personally."
He's oddly the scariest imposter.
For some reason, he becomes rational but manages to hide it well behind his usual hotheadness.
Still would never kill you tho <3
He would completely obliterate you in minecraft however
"eren stop I only have one heart left. you play too much."
"you didnt seem to mind playing when you hit me into lava... I lost all my fucking diamonds so you know what they say... hasta la vista baby"
Sucks at building but sucks at mining as well
usually fights mobs all night to stack up xp
says he's training to fight the dragon
swears he'll slay all creepers
deathly afraid of endermans
when they pop up, his screams are girly and loud
"HOLY SHIT. NO NO NO RUN YOU DAMN MIDGET! FUCKING MOVE!"
when he isn't fighting, he'll gather flowers for you and constantly leave them in places for you to find around your house
"Thanks for the flowers baby, yellow is still my favorite."
"I know princess."
he also puts gifts in your chests even though he sucks at mining, because you deserve the best.
Eren is pretty perverted and though he doesnt look at his stream chat often, whenever he sees any comments about your body or how lucky he is, all he does is grin knowingly and mumble "all mine."
HATES whenever people make it a big deal that you're black
addresses it once and swears if shit starts up again, he'll leave forever and never come back despite streaming being something he loves
will never tolerate racism or hearing stereotypes toward you EVER, even if its unintentional, pops off ever mfing time.
"Whether or not that's her real hair, it doesn't fucking concern you. Stop asking when you clearly look like you have uneven extensions, Brittany. Mind your fucking business."
"Baby chill, maybe she was just asking a honest questions."
"Nah fuck that. I don't give a damn, don't worry about whats in my baby's head."
You know those social media stars, who turn the cheek and allow people to say rude and hateful shit?
Yeah thats not Eren, he will always clap back harder and its beyond disrespectful.
"How are you gonna tell me to kill myself, when your bio literally says fly high mom? You must want me to pay her a visit or something."
"I'm too short? Well I think my height is just fine compared to your brother who seems to be just below six feet."
He has been cancelled TOO many times
its always for stupid shit
for being able to speak Japanese despite being a white man
for thinking pineapple on pizza is good
for liking Pepsi over coke
for pouring his milk in before his cereal
His COD lobby trash talk; while he doesn't say slurs or racist remarks, its too damn vulgar. He was built for that lobby 😭😭
His trash talking is elite and most times you can hear the person he is shit talking on the verge of crying. Its so fucking brutal.
In the same breath, he turn around and ask for kisses from you, as if he didn't make someone rethink being born.
That side only pops out when he is extremely pissed and he tries to avoid ever getting that mad because he knows words can hurt.
AN ADVOCATE FOR THE LGBTQ+ COMMUNITY
Gets super confused whenever someone asks what his thoughts on the community are.
"Love who you want, why the fuck should I worry about what some else gets off to?"
"If dicks makes you hard, cool. If pussy get you off, me too, lets be friends. Sexuality shouldn't matter people, grow tf up."
Donates a huge sum of the money he earns to different causes such as: cleaning up the polluted ocean charities, Black lives matter, protect Asian lives, and feed the hungry.
Basically he's caring and just wants to help despite his impulsive personality.
Once a month, he visits orphanages to talk to the kids, no camera no video nothing just to hang with the kids.
The only way his followers find out is because others posting about it.
Overall, Eren is in love with what he does and you, but if he had to pick, he'd choose you every single day over and over again <3
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tommybaholland · 3 years
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bnha boys as viral tiktok sounds + their reaction
Tumblr media
featuring: bakugo, kirishima, kaminari, amajiki and dabi
bakugo swearing, mentions of titties, dabi gets suggestive. you know, the usual. enjoy!
bakugo  
physical embodiment of ‘how big are those titties bitch?! hurry up, i’m getting weird stares!’ 
you have him listen to the sound and you’re like ‘this u?’
“WHAT?? i sound nothing like THAT, you IDIOT” 
“and DONT ask me to make one of those stupid videos”
and of course you ask him and at first he’s pretty resistant to the idea
but he could never resist for long 
“OKAY FINE, IDIOT. just tell me what to do.”
you tell him what he should do and start the video
you make him hold up a tape measure and everything like you had seen in other videos
he seems to get into it and playfully shakes you by the shoulders while yelling the last line, making you laugh
“there. now stop bothering me and you better NOT post that anywhere.”
“thank you, katsuki,” pressing a kiss to his cheek, making him go red 
“yeah, whatever.”
you’re already thinking about how you can convince him to let you post it >:))
he finally lets you post it but only lets you keep public for one (1) day
but thats long enough to get everyone’s attention 
kirishima actually notifies him of the popularity and even turns baku’s attention to the comments
“dude, everyone thinks you’re so cool! and even some people are...well..”
amongst the simp comments, he becomes livid over the one that are like, “so...how big are their titties??👀” 
and it doesn’t bother you because people will just say whatever they want on the internet 
but he feels like he at least needs to reaffirm something 
“i dont care how big your... titties are. they’re big enough and i love you just the way you are.” 
then he grabs you and pulls you closer to him and starts attacking your neck with kisses
“now put that shit on private or i will reign hellFIRE on all those IDIOTS” 
kirishima 
definitely that one that goes ‘*sigh* i love you *kiss kiss kiss kiss* you set my soul on fire’ 
he’s familiar and comfortable with tiktok so you decide to surprise him with the sound that makes you think of him
“what do you want me to do, pebble?” he asks curiously, holding you in his lap as you set up your phone
“nothing. just be your cute and manly self. ready?” 
you start the video and look him right in the eyes as you sigh and say, “i love you” before leaning in to make him think your lips are gonna touch his
but then you quickly change direction and press multiple kisses to his cheek on the kissing part, making him giggle loudly and hug you close to him
you look back into his bright eyes while speaking the last line and he sees an opportunity to caress your cheeks to pull you in for a passionate kiss at the last second 
and the camera catches ALL of it 
he thinks it’s super cute and encourages you post it 
you’re not one to flaunt your relationship on social media but you do it thinking it’s not going to get much attention anyway
but it blows tF UP 
it gets to almost 1M views and 400k likes in just two days 
even though you made the tiktok, all the comments are about your boyfriends cute ass reaction like “oh to be them 😔” “the WAY that he looked at them and kissed them like😭” “if my boyfriend doesn’t do this then i don’t want him”
you show him how much attention he’s getting like, “wow kiri, they love you!”
and he gets all modest like, “i think they love you too because you’re my cute little pebble! now give your boulder a kiss..”
is totally down to make more tiktoks with you anytime <3
 kaminari 
this is not denki slander but 
‘you don’t have a thought behind those eyes, do you? sweet boy’
he’s actually the one that brings it up and shows you immediately when he hears the sound
he’ll be like, “is this what you think of me?”
and he’s joking but you know he can be self-deprecating sometimes 
“of course not, babe...well, sometimes. only when you’ve short circuited.”
he appreciates your honesty but still looks kinda sad about it 
you get closer, and caress the sides of his head to make him look at you
“you are a sweet boy, though. you’re my sweet boy.” and then you make him giggle by giving him eskimo kisses 
he wants you to film a video with the sound while his brain is fried 
at first you’re like, “are you sure?”
and he says he wants to keep it to remind him how great you are when you’re not around
he’s too cute so you agree
he makes himself short circuit pretty easily and without using his quirk by reading one of momo’s books with a lot of large, confusing words in it
you start the video and look him in the eyes to say the first part while holding his face
on the ‘sweet boy’ part you pull him to rest his head on your shoulder while your stroke his hair carefully
after you stop the video and he calms down he watches it and thinks it’s cute that you continue to hold him even though he emits small waves of electricity that can shock you 
“you’re the best s/o, you know that? i love you so much, my wonderful buzzy babe.” and he hugs you real tight
you offer to let him post it if he wants 
“no way, this is too special to share with anyone else.”
he is such a sweet boy >.<
amajiki 
thought about this one long and hard bc there’s honestly nothing cuter than this shy boi 
but ultimately 
‘you’re my honey bunch sugar plum pumpy-umpy-umpkin you’re my sweetie pie’
he doesn’t understand why you associate him with it when you show him
“because you’re so cute and precious, especially when you get all nervous and shy”
he disagrees, “no, bunny, i think you’re the cute and precious one here.” 
easily starts a ‘no you’re cuter’ war between you two 
but then he suddenly gets really nervous
“you’re, you’re uh, not gonna post a video about me, are you?” 
you’re like, ‘of course not’ but that doesn’t stop you from singing the song to him everytime hes being a cutie 
which is like, everyday 
and he thinks it’s equally embarrassing 
“bunny, please. i, i know you love that song, but i want to be cool.”
he just doesn’t get it
“but you’re both cool and cute, tamaki. the duality of you is one of the many reasons why i love you so much. i may be cute but i could never be as cool as you.” 
he’s so red in the face but he has to take the chance to kiss you with everything he has 
because if he can’t say it at first, he just feels it and does it 
“i love you so much, too, bunny. and you’re cute and so many other w-wonderful things. please never forget that.”
in conclusion *exhales* i love tamaki amajiki 
dabi 
two words: simp scream
you know what i’m talking about 
that’s the only sound i think about when i see this man
it’s either this or the one that’s like ‘sometimes bad things happen to people with nice tits’
but anyway so...simp scream 
one time you decided to make a tiktok with that sound while you two were getting ready for bed 
you’re just lying there, all innocent, and start filming right before he pulls his shirt off
he turns over to you with your phone propped up on your stomach
smirks once he realizes you’re filming and walks over to you as the ‘WOW w o w’ part plays 
you’re able to catch all of it before he gets on top of you, hovering above with a devilish smirk still present on his marred face
your phone falls against your stomach when he pins your hands down to the mattress
“what do you think you’re doing, hm princess?”
and before you answer he’s already leaning down to kiss and nip at your neck
you giggle as you reply, “nothing...just admiring my favorite burnt boy”
“well,” he lifts his head back up but remains close to your face, speaking seductively
“if you wanted to make a video with me, babydoll,” he kisses your lips slowly
“all you had to do was ask...”
[the rest of this headcanon was redacted bc mans too hot]
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how we feeling on this lovely bnha night?? send all your desires and requests..
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ok so guys, remember that “my father always says azula was born lucky, i was lucky to be born” line? yeah, now explain to me why tf are we even considering OZAIs words?!?! like some people use this line as an argument against azula when its literally what OZAI SAID?!?!!?!!?!
Zuko’s good and bad luck, as well as Azulas. Was either of them lucky? Let’s see.
Please read all of it before drawing assumptions.
Zuko’s luck:
- has mums care and affection
- has irohs care and affection
- can get away with being a softie as a child, because he may get disregarded and called weak but lets be honest, azula wouldnt have been able to get away with his behavior because she didn’t have firstborn privilege (which is a thing while azulon lived) or mummy’s protection like he did.
before anyone comes at me i’ll expand a bit on the firstborn privilege. as first born he was instantly considered more important by the masses since birth, that might’ve changed later but before neither could bend that much was still a fact. which means azula wouldn’t really have any recognition for anything unless she surpassed him in every way, which is what became her goal especially when ozai became the one who spent more time with her rather than ursa, anyways lets continue.
- constantly receiving second chances; iroh, the gaang minus katara, katara, azula (even if not from the “good” side), ozai (no matter the intentions, this much is true), iroh again, mai, the entire fckng world.
- he had a guide and help throughout his long healing and learning process.
Zuko’s bad luck:
- Unloving father
- Mummy disappears
- Doesn’t train that hard and surprise surprise, is worse than azula. Because if he had really trained hard, he would’ve at least known the formations wether he was able to firebend with them or not, but he was just clearly trying to copycat azula while tripping over because he didn’t have that much experience doing it. This is something no one can change my mind about. How tf did he expect to excel if he didn’t train enough. This wasnt about luck but hard work which he didn’t put in, too busy playing with mum and the little turtleducks. And I do not hate Zuko, I really love him but this is just a fact and he’s too fixed on blaming everyone else for his own mistakes and problems (esp Azula). Like, im sorry to break it out to you honey, but Ozai hates you because he’s an asshole, and that’s his own fault, not Azula’s.
- Scar and exile time, we all know this.
- Ugly haircut because of dishonor
- Finally achieving his goal of regaining his “honor” but realizing it wasn’t what he wanted only when he was already at the Fire Nation palace having all the glory from Aang’s presumed death.
- Katara’s distrust after his betrayal (bc who would’ve expected that to happen /s)
- Getting zapped in an attempt to save Katara.
I mean except for the things related to Ozai, most of this was all consequences from his own actions.
And I’m sorry but I don’t understand the fixation he has with having Ozai’s love. Unlike Azula, he has had his mother’s love and his uncle’s love. He knows what real love looks like and he has never really seen anything that could imply Ozai likes him, while he has Iroh treating him like he’s his actual father.
I’m not invalidating his traumas in any way and terrible things did happen to him, but why is he so obsessed with Ozai and why would he choose him over Iroh, he’s 16 and has been with Iroh since age 13, he was also with Ursa for the majority of his childhood, make it make sense.
Azula’s luck:
- Uh she was born rlly smart i guess
- She had some natural talent and knew to train hard to shape it to perfection, as well as studying a lot about war tactics and shit ig
- Ty Lee and Mai loved her and she loved them back
I mean as far as luck goes, that’s it. Everything else was achieved on her own merit and even if she had no scar, her traumas are just as valid as Zuko’s, neither is worse or better, we do not compare traumas in this house and they were both terrible.
Azula’s bad luck:
- Bad mother (i’ll make a post on why Ursa sucks)
- No second chances
- Mum never said goodbye just like she never said “i love you” lol, except in that one hallucination
- Never has had any real help to heal (i’ll make a post on why the asylum was a trash idea that would’ve never worked)
- Can’t fully trust anyone, not even herself, or will be punished for it
- The only people who loved her, Mai and Ty Lee, “betraying” her (check out my post on that, its under #jinta’s commentary)
- Ozai psychologically abusing her all her life
- Some characters may have been lonely, but she was genuinely absolutely alone. And she knew it.
- Hurt and self-hatred channeled through anger like Zuko did sometimes when he had that shame shave ponytail, but with her, its all the time.
- Even his abuser abandons her
- Everyone hates her but forgives Zuko, Mai and Ty Lee. And it’s so annoying because all Mailee did that Azula didn’t was swap sides almost at the end, if the excuse is that they were being manipulated well Ozai was manipulating Azula so what’s the excuse.
- Is always believed to be lying but usually isn’t (check out my azula always lies post)
- Has a mental breakdown and nobody gives a shit?! Like the first think Zuko thought of was “ooh she’s slipping lemme take advantage of that”
- Has nothing and no one, yay
- Gets thrown into a stupid asylum but not rlly because there are no comics in ba sing se
While Zuko had Ursa and Iroh to protect him and stuff, she was victim of Ozai’s manipulation and psychological abuse all her life.
So when we know Ozai said she was lucky, why tf is anyone taking his word for it??!
Plus when Zuko was born they didn’t know how he would be and Azula didn’t exist so there was no way he could’ve been lucky to be born.
Zuko was very unlucky, but he was also lucky.
Azula was just unlucky.
edit: as bellatrixobsessed1 said, azula had the illusion of luck.
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boyfriend!bakugou headcannons
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before dating
- will start noticing you only after you either,,
A) do something intentionally heroic
B) do something incredibly stubborn/borderline reckless to save someone
-there is no room in his big boy ego brain for anyone who doesn’t possess hero qualities,, soz thats just the way it is
-thats not to say he would only date someone from the hero course tho,, he would 100% take interest in someone from any course
-as long as they’re as dedicated to helping others and giving their 100% to everything they do,, he’d be happy
-would watch you for a long time but would be incredibly obvious about it. he’d try and hide it and be sneaky, but everyone knows. even you.
-when he finally asks you out, there was not a single plan involved. he just saw you alone and decided to man up about it on a whim
-that being said- after he does ask you out, he immeadiately panics about what to do on your first date. que frantic google searching-
top searches from that night include
how do cool guys dress
how to stop blushing
first date ideas that arent romantic
why am i sweating so much
-first date is an utter disaster by traditional standards
-he takes you somewhere with an athletic aspect- like minigolf or laser tag. he pays for you but immeadiately follows it up with “you better actually play and don’t just make me waste my money! its not gonna be fun kicking your ass unless you try, got it?”
-you have fun and can’t stop smiling- but not bc lil katsuki is charming you.
-no, you’re smiling bc he’s embarrassing himself at every turn trying to impress you. at first it’s a little off-putting, but then you realize just how much he cares and it’s kinda cute
-cute in the a dog-chasing-it’s-tail-until-it-gets-dizzy-and-falls-over kinda cute; but adorable nonetheless
-bakugou walks away from the date thinking he crushed it. just absolutely blew it out of the water,, there’s no doubt in his mind even though there 100% should be
early relationship
-incredibly touchy,, but not in like traditional or “cute” ways
-prior to you, bakugou’s only significant feeling was pure rage,, so needless to say he doesn’t know how to handle his sudden urge to touch you all the time
-he’s super nervous about it and doesn’t know if it’s suddenly okay hug and touch you as much as he wants to,, so he resorts to less traditional means of skinship
-so he’ll flick your forehead when you smile just right at him. he’ll pinch your cheeks when you talk too much. he’ll drop his hand flat and heavy over yours while you’re writing,, just so the pencil skitters across the page and you yell at him.
-he’ll push you over. not like a hard shove or anything,, but if he sees you sitting on the ground or squatting, he’ll just sort of push you over??? especially if you’re standing up from a chair,,
-ofc he catches you before you can fall or anything, but really he just uses “saving” you as an excuse to touch you
-he’ll push at you, catch you, and then smirk at you with “god, you’re so clumsy. i won’t always be around to save your sorry ass, you know.”
-it’s annoying so you just push him away and glare, but unfortunately for you, that’s what he wanted the whole time bc he’s a little shit
-that being said,, he’s still suprisingly sweet in even weirder ways
-bakugou’ll make you food. but he’ll never be around when you eat it,, you’ve tried before to eat the meals he cooks for you right after he cooks them, but he gets too embarrassed and finds an excuse to leave right when you’re about to eat the first bite
-he’ll tease you. a lot. about everything. but nobody else can tease you,, if somebody’s embarrassing you, bakugou will either threaten them until they stop talking or make a scene until nobody is paying attention to you anymore
-he’ll leave you little notes. most of them just have little doodles on them with reminders about homework or training, but they’re cute nonetheless
-when he takes you out on dates his hands always crackle when he first sees you. you’ve come to learn that the more dressed up you are, the more his palms will crackle
-normally you have to be the one to initiate any sort of romantic contact,, pls just kiss him already he’s almost always thinking about it but cant find the courage to do so
-when he does kiss or hug you on his own accord,, don’t say anything. he’ll pull away super quick and get all red!!!
established relationship
- suuuper clingy
-, not in the sense that he’s constantly phyiscally all over you,, he just won’t go anywhere with the class if you’re staying back, or will just follow you around the whole day if he’s got nothing else to do
-like,, if the bakusquad is looking for him they’re honestly just better off looking for you since he’s never far behind
-strangely enough, bakugou’s pretty quiet?? if he’s comfortable around you, he’ll stop being so prideful and picking so many arguments.
-his whole badass front at school wears him out,, so if katsuki comes to hang out with you after a long school day he’ll probably want to sit and just listen to you talk
-is a whole ass cat when it comes to physical affection. he normally acts indifferent entirely, but when he wants attention he wants attention
-might as well just drop everything you’re doing since he’s gonna throw you on the bed and just lay directly on top of you until you stop fighting him
-pet his hair super softly and tell him he’s strong and that you’re proud of him pls,, katsuki will cry
-formal dates happen less often now, but you see him more,,, in fact, you’re almost never without him. when he’s not doing school or studying or training katsuki is always where you are
-he’s pretty possessive and jealous- not just of like other guys, but literally anything that’s getting your attention. see examples 1 & 2
1.) ooo new book that has you super enthralled??? soz, it’s not just your book anymore. katsuki sits you on his lap and tells you that the only way he’s gonna let you continue to “waste your time on something so stupid” is if you read it out loud to him
2.) omg you got a new puppy that you’re just enamoured with?? tough, it’s bakugou’s puppy now too,, and he never lets it leave his side so the only way you’re gonna get to cuddle with the puppy is if you cuddle with bakugou too
-he’s super proud of you so he’ll introduce you as his s/o to everyone he meets,,, and if the person he’s talking to also has an s/o??? good lord katsuki would never shut tf up about how much better and stronger and cooler you two were than the other couple
-is not embarrassed about pda. at all. if everyone already knows you’re together than there’s nothing to hide,, he thinks that since he put in all the work to get you to love him than he should be able to reap the rewards,, anywhere. at anytime.
-that being said, he does find showing affection in front of others to be v v embarassing!!! so to combat that he turns it up to 11 and flirts and flusters you so bad so that all the 1A guys just think he’s super cool and manly with u instead of soft
-that being said, the second you guys are alone it’s like a switch has been flipped and you could fluster him only by batting your eyes just right
-insists you ‘cook’ with him. katsuki doesn’t let you do much but like cut up vegetables or stir, but he likes to listen to you talk while he does everything else
-generally pretty touch starved but only really indulges if you make the first move. like, he won’t ever tell you to come sit with him on the couch, but if you sit down?? then immeadiately he’s pulling you into his side and doesn’t let you up until he’s ready to get up as well
-still pokes and flicks and shoves you. also now feels comfortable enough to prank you. he thinks you’re adorable when you get mad enough to yell at him so prepare to be mad a lot.
-tells you he loves you damn near constantly. he wont say it first tho bc ~tsundere~ but after you admitted it first, he’ll say it. and once you know??? then he’s gonna make sure it’s known,,, blasty baby doesnt do anything half-assed esp not something as important as showing his love
-he likes to pick out your clothes for you bc otherwise you’ll walk about looking too cute and its a problem bc he never figured out how to get his hands to stop crackling
-will call you dumbass, idiot, moron, halfwit, klutz, etc in public but in private it’s usually princess or little brat or very rarely baby
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phantomchick · 3 years
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Merlin fic rec list
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To Be A King by clotpolesonly Teen And Up, No Archive Warnings Apply, Gen, Merlin and Arthur, Merlin and Mordred, Gwen/Arthur, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Merlin's Magic Revealed, Canonical Character Death, BAMF Merlin, Dragonlord Merlin, Original setting, Magical kingdom, King Merlin, Royal!Merlin Summary: When Merlin discovers that his father was an estranged prince and he himself is now the only heir to the throne of a magical kingdom, he is forced to leave Camelot for the perils of a royal court. Will Merlin be able to win Arthur's favor again before Morgana launches an attack on a defenseless Camelot? Will he be able to defend his own kingdom at the same time or will all be lost? -
A Matter of Sovereignty by Kizmet Gen, No Archive Warnings Apply, Friendship Summary A visiting prince takes it into his head to brutalize Merlin, but sometimes the solution to a problem is in how you phrase it.
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Bumps and Bruises by platonic_boner merthur, implied/suspected abuse, Protective Arthur, Magic Revealed, pre-relationship, teen an up, canon typical violence,
Summary: Arthur notices Merlin’s constant injuries, and decides he needs to step in and protect Merlin.
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Finding Home by riventhorn Arthur/Merlin, Hurt/Comfort Summary: Written for a kinkme_merlin prompt. When Gaius retires a new physician takes over and quickly kicks Merlin out of his room and takes it for himself. Arthur finds Merlin sleeping in the stables...and it's winter.
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How To Love A Living Thing by Polomonkey Mature, merthur, Merlin/Arthur, Pendragon (Merlin), Hurt/Comfort, Abuse, Violence, Sexual Harassment, Drowning, Guilt, Romance, Protective Arthur, Mild Sexual Content, Redemption, Healing, Canon Era
Summary Guilt ridden and lonely after his confrontation with Nimueh, Merlin slowly begins to isolate himself from Arthur. When two knights take it upon themselves to teach him his place, Merlin finds himself with nowhere to turn. Will he be able to reach out to his prince before it's too late?
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Obeisance by casspeach Gen, No Archive Warnings Apply, Merlin/Arthur
Summary: It's not that Arthur won't share his toys, just that he expects to get them back undamaged
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All's Well That Ends Well by StormDancer explicit, Merlin/Arthur, Arthur Finds Out, magic reveal Summary: Merlin spent the week and a half that Arthur was gone splitting his time between crafting careful explanations that never ended up explaining the important things, the things that would make Arthur listen, and making half-baked plans to escape to Ealdor. He found a number of fire-proofing spells that would have no effect if they decided to cut his head off, and figured out how to adapt an invulnerability spell he had been trying to find a way to cast on Arthur without him noticing so that it would protect him from being decapitated, but it would have no effect on anything but metal. Despite all his frantic searching, he did not find a teleportation spell, because that would have been too simple and if there was one thing Merlin had learned in his years at Camelot, it was that nothing was ever simple.
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Deeds by the5leggedCricket Merlin/Arthur Pendragon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Episode Related, Oblivious Arthur Pendragon, Teen and Up,
Summary: Arthur is coming of age, and that means he’s about to get Deeds—marks on his body telling him of his soulmate’s greatest accomplishments. But as he tries to find his soulmate, he also makes some worrying discoveries about the kind of person his soulmate is.
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Honorable Intentions by smilebackwards Gwaine/Merlin, Guinevere/Arthur Pendragon, Courtship, Protectiveness, Protective!Arthur, Teen and Up, Summary: There are several considerations Arthur would like to go over, starting with the state of Merlin's virtue.
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Laundry's Hard Work by supercalvin Gen, Teen and Up, Canon Era, can be read as pre-slash, BAMF Merlin
Summary: Wasn't Merlin supposed to be...tiny? When the hell had he learned to use a sword and not fall on his backside? Where the hell did those scars from? What the hell?
or Arthur still thinks Merlin is the young boy he met ten years ago and he starts to notice things in his manservant that he wasn't aware had changed at all.
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Fathom Me Out by supercalvin Merlin/Arthur, Canon Era, Magic Revealed, Teen and up,
Summary: After ten years, Arthur thinks he has Merlin all figured out. But as he watches Merlin, he finds out that he has more questions than answers. The longer he thinks about it, the more uneasy he feels. So he pushes it aside. Except, he can no longer ignore the questions he has about Merlin. Not your everyday reveal!fic
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Loyalty Before Royalty by CaffeinatedFlumadiddle Gen, Gwen & Merlin, Arthur and Merlin being the most iconic duo? I think tf not, Gwen and Merlin wreaking havoc? Teaming up against Arthur? That's the most iconic duo there, as usual, Explicit Language, Fluff and Humor, Attempt at Humor, Arthur is so exasperated, someone help him, good thing he loves them both
Summary: "Where did you get that?" Arthur asked, but he already knew the answer. "Gwen." "...and the horse?" "Gwen." "What about the-" "Gwen." Merlin interrupted. Arthur nodded. At this point, he wasn't sure why he even bothered to ask. He was pretty certain his wife was going to knight Merlin any day now.He looked Merlin up and down for a few moments before accepting it all with a sigh. "As long as you get my armor to me tomorrow...I don't care." He finally said, turning away. Merlin cleared his throat. "Gwen gave me tomorrow off." "For the love of God." Or I hate that Gwen and Merlin's friendship kind of withered away in the later seasons so here's a oneshot about her and Merlin abusing her new royal powers because that's what happens when your best friend becomes queen.
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Know It All Knight by Shi_Toyu Leon & Merlin, Knights of the Round Table, Magic Revealed, protective leon, Arthur Finds Out, Oblivious Arthur
Summary: Leon couldn’t say for sure when the exact moment was that he figured out Merlin had magic. He’d suspected it for a little while, to be honest. He definitely had it figured out by the time Arthur managed to ‘kill’ the Great Dragon. What Leon could say for sure was the exact moment he figured out that no one else had figured out Merlin had magic.
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The Nature of Trust by Lynds Merlin's Magic Revealed, Leon is the Mam Friend, Leon is so done, Protective Gwaine, Lancelot Lives, Canon Era, Arthur Finds Out, Hurt Merlin, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Torture, Canon-Typical Violence, reference to hunting and cooking animals Summary: Leon starts to notice that the knights, one by one, are starting to trust Merlin's judgement. That he keeps warning Arthur about danger, and being right. Is there more to Merlin than meets the eye?
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Repercussions by PeaceHeather Fix-It of Sorts, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Lecture, Rants, Episode: s02e06 Beauty and the Beast, Episode: s02e05 Beauty and the Beast, Canon Era, One Shot, Gen Summary: Uther married a troll. In canon, that all worked out fine eventually. In this slight canon divergence, there is at least one noble who's not willing to let it slide so easily.
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No Harm Will Come to You Here by fancyh Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Season/Series 05, Merlin's Magic Revealed, Fluff and Angst, temporary amnesia, teen and up,
Summary: "That was magic," Arthur accuses.
"Oh." Merlin just nods, looking unperturbed.
Arthur fights to keep his expression calm, mind racing and heart pounding. "Sorcery is outlawed in Camelot. On pain of death."
Merlin splutters, finally fixing Arthur with an affronted glare. "It's not like I meant to do it!"
***
Merlin gets hit with a spell meant for Arthur and loses his memory. Revelations ensue. Set sometime after 5x02.
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Metamorphose by clotpolesonly Merlin/Arthur, Teen and Up, Between Seasons/Series, Episode: s03e01 The Tears of Uther Pendragon (Part I), Episode: s03e02 The Tears of Uther Pendragon (Part II), Mpreg, Magic Reveal, Angst with a Happy Ending, Pining, morgana redemption, some transphobic language from Merlin when he finds out he’s pregnant because of magic but it’s mostly just the shock that does it Summary: When Merlin falls into bed with Arthur, he doesn't expect for to wake up alone. He doesn't expect Arthur to give him the cold shoulder either, but there is something else he expects even less which forces him out of the kingdom for over a year. He returns to find a traitor in the court, an army on the way, and a love he'd thought all but lost waiting for him with open arms.
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Four Days To Fall In Love. by CupCakezys Teen and Up, No archive warnings apply, Merlin/Arthur, Morgana/Gwen, Soulmate AU, Arthur Knows About Merlin's Magic, Protective Arthur, Mutual Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, Secret Relationship
Summary: In a world where everyone has a soulmate (or two or three), Arthur Pendragon knows he is destined to be alone. For Arthur can see his heartstring, could follow it to where his soulmate lived, and that could only mean one thing.
His soulmate had magic, and should they ever meet, Arthur would have to kill them.
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Sacrificial Lamb by RurouniHime Angst and Humor, Pining, First Time, First Kiss, Post Season 1, Initial Misunderstanding, But it’s resolved, Happy Ending, Fluff with a touch of angst at first
Summary: Arthur's been overworking his knights, so they come to Merlin as a last resort.
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Cheers and Spirits by CaffeinatedFlumadiddle Gen, The knights are kinda fools, but the best king, Humour, Fluff, Fluff and Humour, Knights of the Round Table & Merlin
Summary: Despite all the supposed trips to the tavern none of the knights have seen Merlin drunk. They decide to rectify that. A poor decision, really.
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Circle 'round the Truth by enviropony Merlin + Knights friendship, Gen, Magic Reveal, Oneshot, Knights of the Round Table & Merlin Summary: They know about the magic. Or, more accurately, Merlin's magic is the truth the knights circle around, and Merlin's loyalty is the one 'round which they rally. (A character study with some yelling, an action sequence, and a bit of walking.) Post-S4.
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Strict Justice by schweet_heart mutual pining, BAMF Arthur, magic reveal, canon au, oneshot, teen and up
Summary: After a particularly grueling battle, Merlin and Arthur share a quiet moment in their tent.
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before it breaks by schweet_heart Teen and Up, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, merlin whump, magic reveal, merlin & arthur, merthur
Summary: “It’s not what it looks like,” he says, hand still outstretched, barely a waver in his voice as he lies, outright, to Arthur’s face. “Sire, I can explain.”
“Can you,” Arthur says. He’s aware that he’s trembling, a seismic reaction to the outrage and denial still fighting it out inside his head, but he knows what he’s seen. What it must be. “Well, then, you’d better be quick about it, because it looks a lot like magic.”
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Until the Day I Die by Cookie Teen and Up, Oneshot, Angst, Temporary Character Death, Angst with a Happy Ending
Summary: Arthur believed Dragoon had killed his father, and so he plunged his sword deep into the sorcerer. Now Merlin was dying in his arms and Arthur was facing the future alone.
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These Castle Walls Bleed Lies by marguerite_26 Mature, hurt/comfort, Magic Reveal, Angst, Merthur, mentions of arthur/gwen, Gwen/Lancelot
Summary: With his father unfit to rule and Camelot decimated, Arthur must assume the role of King. But the truths he discovers shake the foundation of all he holds dear.
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before his eyes (he now sees clear) by hwc Teen And Up Audiences, Uther Pendragon is terrible and complicated, Merlin/Arthur
Summary: It takes Uther half a second to see Balinor in Merlin, and he's almost sure of what he should do.
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Keep Your Secrets by new_kate, orphan_account Mature, rape/non-con, torture, captivity, romance, alternate universe - canon, canon typical violence, hurt/comfort
Summary: Arthur Pendragon is captured by the bandits. While he waits to be ransomed, he slowly gets to know Merlin, the prisoner being held in the next cell.
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Crossing the Line by Ultrageekatlarge BAMF Merlin, Gen, Crack, Oneshot, Magic Reveal, Hurt! Merlin, Humour
Summary: In which Merlin gets bludgeoned, strangled, attacked, smothered, shot with glass, and tossed out a window, burned, whipped, stabbed, thrown down stairs, nearly drowned on dry land, and harpooned, and still manages to save Camelot from seven evil sorcerers, before lunch.
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Your Touch Is My Salvation by elirwen Magic Reveal, Canon Era, Oblivious idiots in love, Curses, Teen and Up, Oneshot, Hurt/Comfort
Summary: Merlin suffers from an effect of a curse. Arthur can help more than he initially thought.
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A Heavy Heart to Carry by Thursday_Next Rescue, Hurt/Comfort, Magic Reveal, Oneshot, Mature, Merlin/Arthur Pendragon
Summary: When Merlin is captured and injured, Arthur must face up to his own feelings for his manservant as well as the many secrets he discovers are being kept from him.
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Can you do that? by no_nutcracker Merlin/Mithian, no archive warnings apply, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Episode: s04e11 The Hunter's Heart, Arthur & Merlin friendship
Summary: Merlin should be overjoyed. He just found his soulmate. If only she was not betrothed to Arhur.
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His Remedy for Care by ArgentSleeper Teen and Up, canon au, Episode: s02e13 The Last Dragonlord, Angst, Canon Typical Violence, Hurt/Comfort, Fix It
Summary: Injured in the dragon attack in lieu of Arthur and afraid of being stopped from going on the mission, Merlin kept away from Gaius and never learned that Balinor was his father. Instead it's Arthur that puts two and two together as he seeks the dragonlord out, first to save his servant (not friend- they can't be friends), then to save his kingdom.
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A Considerable Head Start by ughbutidontwantto BAMF Merlin, Gen, when villains have more regard for you than friends, Camelot has a serious class problem, Merlin deserves better
Summary: Merlin is frighteningly competent and his friends are correctly concerned. Obviously they're going to follow him out to the woods. And obviously they're not going to like what they hea
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The Conscience of the King by ughbutidontwantto Gen, Post-Magic Reveal, Legal Drama, Oneshot, Friendship feels
Summary: Merlin's magic was revealed and now everyone has to deal with it in an official capacity since tragically most of these characters work in government. Arthur, predictably, is struggling to cope.
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Out of Sight, Out of Mind by BabyStepsAreStillSteps Merlin Deserved Better, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Merlin Needs a Hug (Merlin), Episode: s05e09 With All My Heart, Fix It
Summary: When Arthur turned his back on the Dolma that he didn’t know was his manservant, Merlin reminded him that he was missing a very important member of their rescue party.
What if he hadn’t?
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What They Owe Us by ironspidereilish Merlin/Arthur, Alternate Universe, Aredian’s a tax collector instead of a witch hunter but he’s still a bastard, Hurt/Comfort, Poverty, Angst with a Happy Ending, Protective Arthur Pendragon, BAMF Arthur, Canon Era, Romance, sexual coercion mentioned, BAMF Merlin
Summary: When Arthur finds out that the castle staff are having their wages held for weeks at a time and can no longer afford food or their homes, he will not rest until they are protected and Aredian is stopped.
The fact that Merlin’s stomach is rumbling while he delivers the prince his breakfast, and Arthur hates the thought of him suffering, only serves as extra motivation to fix this.
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royal blood by Rona23 crack!fic, humour, comedy, Balinor Lives, Dragonlord things, Golden Age, Bamf Arthur, Bamf Balinor, Bamf Merlin, Fix It, Magic reveal, Oblivious Arthur, Merthur
Summary: ..... as if Balinor could be killed by Bandits O.o
Alternatively: An alternative take on Balinor surviving and saving Camelot. ... And then proceeding to hold the entire kingdom hostage, because he has a frigging Dragon at his disposal :)
- The way by Naelyn Episode: s04e11 The Hunter's Heart, POV Arthur Pendragon, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Oblivious Arthur, Until He’s Not, Hurt/Comfort, Merlin Deserved Better, Communication or lack thereof, Canon Divergence
Summary: "One more word out of you, and I swear to God I will send you into exile."
He knows it’s not the pyre, knows there’s much worse, but banishment would mean staying away from Arthur forever – and, as pathetic as that might sound, he thinks he would rather die than let that happen. It is clear that the feeling is not reciprocated, clear that in Arthur’s eyes, he will never come first. There’ll always be people coming before him, and he’s made peace with that long ago – but if even Agravaine can come before him, then anyone could, no? Anyone could replace him. Call Merlin a traitor and have Arthur get rid of him. Anyone could.
Merlin no longer feels safe in Camelot.
or: Arthur threatens Merlin of banishment. To Arthur's eyes, it's all forgotten. To Merlin's, however... Well, let's just say that his faith in their mutual destiny, once unwavering, finds itself faltering at a dangerously quick rate.
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Better in the Mourning by CaffeinatedFlumadiddle Gen, Lancelot & Merlin, Knights of the Round Table & Merlin, Grief, Fluff and Angst, Gwen/Lance mentioned, let the characters grieve, 5 Knights of Grief
Summary: Merlin mourns Lancelot's death. The rest of the knights help out. (AKA Merlin gets to take advantage of not having to keep a dead loved one a secret and gets some goddamn support in this castle)
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I suppose that I look different (without the robes and crown) by WingedWolf121 Canon Era, Episode: s05e03 The Death Song of Uther Pendragon, Uther Pendragon’s A + Parenting, Ygraine/Uther, Arthur/Merlin, Balinor/Hunith, Dragonlord Merlin, BAMF Merlin, Fix-It, Angst with a Happy Ending
Summary: When Arthur blows the horn of Cathbdhah for the second time, the horn doesn’t just send Uther to the other world. It sends Arthur away as well – to a world where Ygraine never died, the Great Purge never happened, and magic lives freely at court. As do those who practice it.
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For Your Information by reni_days Merlin & Uther, Merlin/Arthur, Modern Era au, Oneshot, Teen and Up
Summary: Merlin sighs. "After your...announcement," he explains, "your father decided he needed a bit more information. Which is apparently where I come in. I'm sort of like his gay tutor, it's hard to explain."
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Good Fortune by platonic_boner Canon Era, Fluff, Merlin/Arthur, Oneshot
Summary: Arthur makes Merlin a lord, and Merlin does an astonishingly good job of running a village.
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Within Reach by foxy_mulder Explicit, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Sex, Merlin/Arthur, Angst with a Happy Ending, Oneshot, Slowburn
Summary: Nobody touches Arthur.
Merlin realizes it slowly, and when he does, he wants to kick himself for not seeing sooner. ___________ (Or, Arthur and Merlin's relationship with touch over time.)
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Moment of Weakness by TheAsexualofSpades Gen, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Arthur Knows About Merlin's Magic, Protective Knights, Protective Arthur Pendragon, Protective Merlin, Whump, Oneshot, Merlin/Arthur
Summary: After all Merlin's gone through, you'd think it would take some world-ending magic spell or an almost successful attempt on Arthur's life to shake him properly.
It isn't one of those, and Merlin has no idea why.
He just knows he can't be weak.
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The Only Reward Bestowed Upon Me by greatdumbking Gen, Oneshot, Merlin/Arthur, angst, hurt/comfort, angst with a happy ending, Episode: s04e05 His Father's Son, Fix-It, Agravaine, Canon Era, Love Confessions
Summary: “You’re wrong Merlin. I don’t need anyone. I can’t afford that luxury. The kingdom's my responsibility now, and mine to bear alone. And you must learn to accept that.”
How could this hurt so much, a third time? Merlin could feel the façade of his casual indifference faltering. His face fell, tears were clawing at his throat, creeping into his eyes. It took all his effort to nod, steel his eyes, and swallow down the rising sob.
(How did Merlin get chosen the be the bait? Why did Arthur start pushing Merlin away? Why couldn't he see how much it was hurting him?)
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Maybe Not the Most Awkward Dinner to Happen in Camelot's Citadel, but it's Definitely Up There by HopePrevails Gen, Gwen/Arthur Pendragon, Merlin, Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Oneshot, Humour, past Gwen/Merlin
Summary: When an argument about whether Merlin is remotely attractive or not breaks out over dinner, Queen Guinevere accidentally drops into the conversation that she had a crush on him when he first arrived in Camelot. Arthur takes it... like Arthur.
--x--
“Don’t look so surprised, Merlin.” Gwen said kindly. Perhaps she was the psychic. “You’re sweet and gentle, charismatic-” Arthur snorted. “- and I’m not going to let you walk out of those doors thinking you don’t look the part, either. Remember, even when you first came to Camelot, I-” She stopped herself, snapping her lips tightly shut.
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255 notes · View notes
tracer85s · 3 years
Text
yizhan fic rec (2)
part 1
glute bridges by sunstainedsheets
[explicit, 29k, complete]
personal trainer and dancer yibo and graphic designer xiao zhan. GYM AU omg i love this. xiao zhan signs up for a gym membership and personal training sessions where he’s totally not ogling his coach. there’s also a scene with xiao zhan attempting to converse with yibo in korean that got me cackling lmao, our resident koreaboo indeed. it was also great to see mentor yibo here, it reminded me of his prod 101 days when he was so intimidating as a mentor, also... very sexy. anyway i adore this, they’re just thirsting over each other, especially yibo checking out the zhass, it’s okay bobo we’ve all been there
i’d wear gucci for you by Anonymous
[teen and up, 16k, complete]
abo au where alpha yibo and omega xiao zhan are photographed going into xiao zhan’s apartment together so they’re forced to pretend that they’re mated to prevent a scandal. this has become my favourite fics because i’m an absolute sucker for fake/pretend relationships and the way the writer incorporated canon stuff like yibo answering interview questions for xiao zhan ugh guys i love this fic. when yibo was so exasperated near the end and said “i’m wearing gucci for you” & waving his hand i really lost it. JUST READ THIS I PROMISE IT’S A GOOD READ
if you would only let you by gdgdbaby
[explicit, 32k, complete]
ah where do i even start with this one? xiao zhan gets drunk and texts yibo, yibo shows up at his house and whisks him away on a road trip. i felt so much emotions reading this fic, everything was so raw and it really deals with the pressures of being famous and homophobia. this is a super realistic fic and there’s a lot of emotional hurt/comfort, you’ll literally end up wanting to wrap these two in a big blanket and just protect them from the world (lol like we don’t already want to do that). my absolute favourite part was the confession scene, like it was so messy and funny, and it’s just so them, especially the pokemon part lmao. this art is based on that scene and it’s exactly how i imagined it 🥺 this is just so well written and it’s one of my favs!
love in the time of coding by theivoryflute
[explicit, 26k, complete]
hacker yibo and cyber security engineer xiao zhan. yibo cyber flirts with xiao zhan and also flirts with him in real life. *SCREAMS* i never thought we’d have a hacker au in the fandom but i’ve been blessed, this was literally the cutest online romance fic with a bunch of mutual pining. my favourite dialogue is “the whiplash from wanting to ride yibo to wanting to coddle him was severe” i’m literally wheezing, this is a perfect representation of the fandom, also the usernames that yibo picked got me cackling there’s one in particular that made me laugh, you’ll know what it is when you see it so go read this gem!
Peace & Love by ella_minnow
[explicit, 51k, complete]
my favourite writer is back again with this baby! idol dance captain xiao zhan and non-famous dancer yibo!!! ARE WE KIDDING? slow burn sdoc au? I’M SO IN WTF. guys listen to me. yibo has a low ponytail and arm tattoos *goes feral* one of my favourite scenes from this fic is when xiao zhan had to convince yibo to join his team (bro. he didn’t even have to try) because yibo says “no, Xiao-laoshi. I would of course never leave you.” i’m screeching, totally gave me tgcf hua cheng vibes. my absolute favourite scene, however, is when yibo says xiao zhan doesn’t have to worry about sending him home because he’s going to win everything... like... the sheer bde this man exudes in real life and fiction... very sexy of him. i also love how this showcases how well they work together and of course the *whispers* celebratory sex!
Hyacinth by stickyriceu
[explicit, 76k, complete]
racer yibo celebrates after a competition and meets hyacinth’s number one host, zhan-er. slow burn with LOTS of pining and angst. i finished this in one sitting and i’m still screaming over it, it’s so good!!! genuinely felt my soul leave my body reading this because zhan zhan with shoulder length hair? tied up in a messy bun? *SCREECHES* everyone go read and get your angst on, don’t worry, there’s a happy ending ;)
Song of the Sea by LaMachina17
[explicit, 48k, complete]
mermaid xiao zhan and pirate yibo !!! xiao zhan meets yibo and has one very exciting night with him so he ends up following him aboard their pirate ship! i’m literally on my knees praising this fic. i will re-read this until i die, it’s perfect. AND THEY’RE CAT DADS IN THIS FIC TOO. seriously i don’t need to say anything else go read this gem
The Dragons by MadFilaments
[explicit, 31k, complete]
xiao zhan is his village’s marriage offering to dragon lord yibo. are you kidding me? shapeshifter yibo? arranged marriage fic? YES. this is one of my favourites, i always re-read it because the way their relationship just naturally progresses in the story warms my heart 😩 AND they call each other husband and i just *melts* they’re ! so ! domestic ! there’s angst but it’s not too bad and i’m in love with yibo’s speech about how dragons love forever *cries*
golden hour by Deinde
[explicit, 35k, complete]
professional snowboarder yibo teaches actor xiao zhan how to snowboard in a show! OH MY GOD THIS WAS SO GOOD *SCREAMS* it’s literally just them flirting and being absolutely thirsty for each other, especially in the photoshoot scene dear lord. i’m so annoying, this fic tab has been open in my safari for forever and i forgot about it until i watched ddu’s snow sports episode so don’t do the same thing as me and go! read! this! fic! immediately!
Falling In Love by beeswaxing
[mature, 65k, complete]
celebrities yibo and xiao zhan star in a we got married/hello baby inspired reality show! oh my god. the domestic fluff in this i am reeling, THIS IS JUST ADORABLE. this is definitely the domestic kid fic i so desperately needed 😭 and the way the writer added in those canon bjyx details is just perfect, everyone go read this please!!
Legend of the Jade Rabbit: The Musical by emma_screams
[explicit, 12k, complete]
high school au with lion hybrid yibo and bunny hybrid xiao zhan. this fic has musicals! it’s really quite fluffy, yibo literally calls zhan zhan “bunny gege” and i’m just *SCREECHING* also i love protective yibo 😭 i really love this it’s so cute & has a very refreshing plot!
pick me, pick me up by domeeneec
[mature, 10k, complete]
college/uni wrong number au where xiao zhan keeps accidentally calling yibo to bail him out of his bad dates and yibo ends up becoming his “personal dating assistant” this was the FLUFFIEST. although there is some light angst when xiao zhan drunk dials yibo and cries about not being able to find love, but i swear this is super soft and fluffy!!! READ THIS FOR SEROTONIN
Ruby and Gold by aces_low
[explicit, 16k, complete]
mob boss xiao zhan and his trophy husband yibo. HELLO? MURD3R HUSBANDS YIZHAN? this was such a fun read! trigger warnings for blood and violence though so look out for those! yizhan will literally not hesitate to beat you tf up in this fic they’re so badass here but they’re so soft with each other. xiao zhan literally calls yibo gǒu zǎizǎi and tiánxīn i am. Melting. also there’s a proposal. it’s unromantic but still so romantic, i love it. i also saw this art and i think this would be how they look in the fic
To Be Human by purplemonster
[teen and up, 19k, complete]
humanoid yibo and ceo xiao zhan. xiao zhan tests out his company’s newest creation and falls in love along the way. android aus always hurt me so. good. and this one’s not an exception. it’s pretty slow burn and definitely angst-y but it has a happy ending! i love the domesticity, i have no idea why i love grocery scenes so much? but anyway this is perfect for a rainy day and you’ll coo at the ending
Falling by brooklinegirl
[explicit, 42k, complete]
yb and xz behind the scenes while filming. this was such a melancholic read for me (even though there’s so much papapa) because they pine SO HARD at the start, don’t get me wrong though, it’s also cute because there’s so much canon flirting!but my heart really broke when filming was ending and yb’s thoughts were “We could run away together. Miss our flights. Stay here in Hengdian, or fuck it, go somewhere where no one knows us and just...” *sobs* pls go read!!!
What’s Your Emergency? by bluefloral
[general, 2k, complete]
police officer yibo and single father xiao zhan! yuan, xiao zhan’s son calls 911 for help with his math homework and officer yibo helps him 🥺 this was such an adorable short read!
165 notes · View notes
bpdanakins · 3 years
Note
i just infodumped to my friends about bpd anakin and i have No Regrets snakjdkajfsk
anyway, doth thee have any more bpd anakin (or just anakin in general) headcanons becuase i am living for this
I am So Sorry this took so long, but hopefully the length makes up for it. Thank you so much for sending this to me bc BPD!Anakin is my entire life. I could talk about it all day, every day.
I’d like to thank @apple-grass-and-smiles for helping me organize my Thoughts on all of this, prompting me to focus on certain things and giving me feedback in general too. 
Okay, here goes:
Anakin fidgets!! I’m not even sure if this is a headcanon but if it is I will die on this hill. He can’t stay still for the life of him and doubly so when he’s anxious, nervous or Ready To Do Something Already. 
We know Anakin can’t hold eye contact to save his life when he’s upset or insecure, but I can also see him having issues with touch when he’s upset, unless it’s from certain people only (Padmé always gets a pass, for example).
Anakin’s quick to let some small stuff go, but larger things people do that hurt him (whether intentionally or not) aren’t really ever forgotten, and he just kind of takes that in and suppresses it, until random moments when it pops up, he remembers, and it just hurts like it’s happening all over again. The people around him often have no idea what fully sets him off, bc to them, his reaction now seems out of nowhere while his mind’s still stuck on this other thing.     - His reactions also seem sometimes like they’re Over The Top, but even just remembering past hurts can feel almost disabling at times. It’s worse when he ends up ruminating on it, because the hurt and feelings of betrayal just keep building up over and over until it almost blots everything else out.
When he���s happy or surrounded by those he loves, everyone kind of can feel it too, bc he’s just fuckoff powerful in the Force and esp other Force sensitives kind of gather around his space and just… his affection and excitement are literally infectious. 
This probably runs closer to ADHD than BPD for sure, but get him talking about anything mechanical (robotics, engineering, racing, etc) and he will go from 0 to 100 so fast you’d get whiplash. No one minds though bc, as I said, his excitement is infectious and honestly those around him just adore listening to him go off even though half of it goes over their head.     - Ahsoka may not ever get Gotta Go Fast, but she definitely loves it when he really talks her ear off about all this stuff, bc it makes her excited to learn and she picks up on all of it easily. (There’s a part of her that wants to emulate him and she does def look up to him obviously.)     - We see it with Obi-Wan, but people love to use his love of all things mechanical as a way to distract him from things that upset him. It doesn’t always work but they try.
With Obi-Wan, he ends up on the side of Anakin’s splitting like, all the time. And unfortunately sometimes Obi-Wan can’t tell that Anakin’s lashing out not because of something Obi-Wan’s actually done, but bc Anakin’s young and Obi-Wan’s the figure he can project a lot of his frustrations on.     - It can lead Obi-Wan to being confused and hurt sometimes, bc he doesn’t always understand Anakin’s thought processes when this happens, and it definitely sometimes cuts him to the core. On the reverse side, though Anakin might not always say it to his face, Obi-Wan definitely can overhear him at times when Anakin’s ready to 1v1 anyone who even so much as makes a frowny face about Obi-Wan, which helps Obi-Wan remember that Anakin does love him too, actually.     - It ends up being one of the points of frisson between Anakin and Mace, bc Anakin can’t read body language perfectly, especially when it comes to feelings of abandonment or someone seemingly not loving who Anakin loves to the same degree. Mace has a drier sense of humor at times and defs has a more resting frowny face, and this rankles Anakin at times bc he can’t always tell when Mace is just chilling vs being disappointed, and while Anakin will take it all personally, he ALSO takes any perceived criticism to those he loves personally too.     - Both Mace and Obi-Wan don’t get this bc they have a perfectly fine relationship. Anakin’s just Like That.     - (And super overprotective of people’s perceptions of Obi-Wan. Anakin will go off about Obi-Wan being mean and all that, but fuck you and your entire family tree if you ever even think Obi-Wan’s anything short as the most amazing Jedi to ever Jedi.)
Everybody and their mother can see the pedestal Anakin puts Padmé on, and surprisingly she rarely is on the end of his splitting. When he does, he just internalizes it bc he can’t stand the idea that he’s somehow seen her in a wrong light, or he feels guilty for getting angry with her.     - He also defines a huge chunk of his life around loving her, making her his center for a lot of his decisions and reactions, so when they’re off, his whole world seems backwards. It makes him Really uncomfortable and unsure. He gets panicky and upset and often people have no idea what the cause is so they just end up a lil panicky in return.     - He tends to take it out on others, by doing an exercise or by disappearing to fiddle with something.     - Pads has an easier time recognizing Anakin’s emotional needs, bc in some ways they’re the same as hers. She’s good at reaching out to him, comforting him and reassuring him of her love. And in turn, he like, never fucking shuts up about how much he loves her, and those moments are what make her feel so special around him. Being loved by Anakin makes someone feel important and even get tingly, bubbly happy feelings, because it’s hard to doubt it sometimes.     - There’s a part of her that sometimes worries about how Intense he is, but, like I said, when his positive intense emotions are focused on you, it feels wonderful. And he’s genuinely super sweet and gentle, and she appreciates that, when she tells him to back off about something, he’ll listen to her wishes. (I’m using movie Anakin as my base here bc TCW!Anakin in this regard is just…. bad y’all lmao)
Anakin’s anxious about Ahsoka All The Time. He’s afraid he’s a bad teacher, he’s afraid he’ll mess her up somehow, he’s afraid he’ll hurt her or she’ll get hurt, and that’s why he can’t stand the idea sometimes of her being on her own. It’s not a lack of trust in her abilities, but because he feels responsible for her, and that’s why he’s always ready to put himself between her and literally anything that could potentially hurt her. (Even if it’s not a physical threat.)     - There are times she finds this amusing and times this makes her angry, but mostly she is long suffering. There are times she appreciates it though, bc she’s still a kid and isn’t always sure which way is up, especially when in a war. Anakin is often a cornerstone for her, and though she’d literally NEVER admit it, his overprotectiveness can sometimes be a reassurance. She knows she can handle herself just fine, but when she has an inkling of doubt, she’ll remind herself that Anakin will be there, and then go and take care of the problem herself.     - She doesn’t always get his moments where he’s not always falling over himself to talk Obi-Wan up or go out of his way to sass at him. To her, they have a wonderful relationship and she rarely notices when Obi-Wan might say something that pokes at Anakin wrong, so she often just winds up ???? when Anakin is huffy or annoyed with her grandmaster.     - She sees Anakin’s anger issues a little more easily than others, and she worries about it but always brushes it off or downplays it, bc she always sees why he’s angry, and also always just assumes (like everyone else) that he can Handle It.     - Anakin’s recklessness and impulsivity are some of her favourite things about being his padawan. He’s literally never boring to be around, and Ahsoka needs that sort of excitement to sometimes push aside the knowledge that she’s literally in a warzone. Anakin’s also really good at doing this intentionally; he’s literally always worrying after her, and all he wants to do is take care of those he loves and make them happy, so sometimes he’ll be Extra just to get under her skin or distract her and honestly this is the basis of where their playful competitions always come from.
If Ahsoka is long suffering, Rex is doubly so. Sometimes it’s all he can do to keep up with Anakin and Ahsoka, but he appreciates Anakin “thinking outside the box”. He also appreciates knowing that Anakin is just as loyal to him and his men as he himself is (well… Anakin is until he isn’t lmao)     - Rex, like Pads, is really good at picking up Anakin’s moods and even trains of thought, so he’s always able to work around that, or even see where Anakin’s mind is going when coming up with a plan. They make a really good team bc while Anakin can jump from one idea to another without them seemingly correlated, Rex immediately follows Anakin’s leaps and they just end up in sync.     - That being said, Anakin can be really confusing at times. His moods are often so all over the place, that Rex generally has no idea what tf is going on. He deals with it by learning to be calm when Anakin’s unable to, and just ride out Anakin’s worst moods until they pass by, learning not to let it all phase him. Anakin lowkey hates it when he’s upset, but once the worst of it passes, he really appreciates that Rex will just… not press like Obi-Wan, or balances out the moments Anakin’s mind is so cluttered by instead just keeping a good focus on things.
Probably everyone’s most baffling symptom of Anakin’s is his paranoia. Obi-Wan kind of sees it the most, because Anakin is always testy with the Council and often feels put on the spot, dismissed and looked down upon. To everyone else, they don’t get where Anakin’s ideas come from, bc everything seems chill on their end. His fretting about others’ well-being is straightforward enough, but his instant panic-turned-anger shift when he receives any criticism (especially the perceived type) always gives people whiplash. It’s hard to keep up with, hard to see what it was that got to him so much, and hard to know how to help (particularly when they’re worried that trying to help him will feel like “taking sides”).     - Ahsoka takes Anakin’s POV of the Council pretty easily, at least when it comes to him. This is mostly bc she’s not there when there’s a meeting or tension around them, nor was she there when Anakin first arrived, so she just assumes they must genuinely often have issues with him too. She doesn’t see it to the extent Anakin does though, but she recognizes that sometimes he seems to blow things out of proportion when he’s upset, and figures it’ll just blow over once he’s calmed down.     - Pads, on the other hand, is always kind of aware of Anakin’s fears of losing her. He often not-so-subtly looks for reassurances that she loves him and won’t leave him, that she’s feeling alright or not angry/annoyed with him. She chalks it up to his trauma with his mother (and she’s partially right), so even when sometimes it gets on her nerves that he seems to doubt her so much, she tries to remind herself of that and let it go. 
Those closest to him can pick up that Anakin tends to see the negative in things, and is generally really hard on himself. They try to help out by giving praise where it’s due and just overall Being There, but it’s Rough to know they often don’t get through. (Palps, on the other hand, knows how to weaponize this.) 
The saddest part is that I don’t think anyone once thought Anakin was Seriously Ill, partly out of ignorance, partly bc they assumed it had to do with his age/upbringing, and partly bc, eventually, everyone was dealing with trauma and even if someone wanted to send Anakin back to the Temple to have a nap or something, they legit couldn’t bc there was a war going on and he also would never have tolerated it at that point in time.     - Obi-Wan’s the one who worries about all of this the most, because he’s always felt such a huge responsibility for Anakin and loves him a lot, he’s just never fully been able to understand how to get on the same wavelength as Anakin.     - Anakin, too, actually never fully figures out that there is something Going On. Everything’s always overwhelming him and even though he prefers doing things at 100mph, sometimes it seems like there is Too Much going on, and even during peace times it just felt like he couldn’t keep up with everything. He hates internal reflection but also can’t stop overthinking about everything, and so he just ruminates and goes in circles and often just ends up going nowhere when it comes to dealing with things. He tries his hardest all the time, he is ALWAYS trying, but doing stupid stunts, fighting droids, making robots and speeding everywhere all the time is truthfully only a bandaid.     - Being surrounded by those he adores and receiving affection from them/seeing them happy boosts his mood a lot but he doesn’t have enough self-awareness to guess at why his happier moods just won’t last.     - Sometimes he can figure out when he’s being irrational and then just takes it out on himself, which only exacerbates his bad episodes. 
Palpatine doesn’t help. He’s abusive, manipulates Anakin all the time and is the Worst and definitely makes everything Anakin is struggling with harder and I think we should all just punt him into a sun thank you this isn’t a headcanon I just want everyone to know how much I hate him
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franniebanana · 3 years
Text
CQL Rewatch - Ep 19
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Wow, Wei Wuxian looks so rough here. He’s spent some time under the knife (with no anesthetic), and then after that, he has just been waiting around for Jiang Cheng. It’s been seven days since Jiang Cheng went up that mountain. And of course Wei Wuxian is worried about him. What if something happened on his way down the mountain? What if he’d been captured or killed by the Wens? All the while, he’s basically defenseless here in Yiling (iirc). He’s sweating profusely, clutching at his middle—it’s possible he’s even suffering from an infection due to the transfer surgery. Seriously, the poor guy!
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I love the visuals here: all these cloaked figures just filling this tea house, and not another soul in there other than the waiters. It’s both comical and heartbreaking the way that Wei Wuxian tries to immediately nope out of there, because he knows it’s a trap right away. Even with his Golden Core, I don’t know if he could have escaped them all—there were too many Wens, including the Core-Melting Hand. This part always really gets to me, because it truly is the first death of Wei Wuxian. It’s the death of who he once was: that smart, quirky, rascal of a youth, who made a very honest oath that essentially guided him to this point.
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No joke, the first time I watched this, I was like, “Is that Lotus Pier? How tf did he get there?! How much did they change the story?!” And then a few seconds later, I realized this was a super sad dream/vision that Jiang Cheng was having and I channeled all my anger into sadness. This part is also super depressing. He has this vision of this happy family: his mother laughing, his father kissing his hand, just the picture of love. But it’s so far from what he had growing up, and you just realize that his greatest desire was really to have that happy family. But his parents are dead, he’s lost just about everyone at Lotus Pier—it’s so heartbreaking.
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God, he just looks so broken! I’m sad now.
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So even though I know the cost of Jiang Cheng’s happiness is Wei Wuxian giving up his own Golden Core, I still feel so happy here, seeing Jiang Cheng feeling like himself again. It’s because Wei Wuxian knows Jiang Cheng’s heart truly that he could offer up his own future so that Jiang Cheng could have a better one. I also just love this shot of Jiang Cheng kowtowing to the Immortal One, thanking her for healing him, and the camera pans past him, showcasing the beautiful scenery again. And then he walks down the mountain path with such a spring in his step! I love it!
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I love that Wei Wuxian is still able to use his mind and play to their weaknesses. Wang Lingjao is extremely superstitious and fearful of the supernatural, and just the idea that he could haunt them scares the shit out of her. It’s just very cool to me that with all the abuse he endures, he still maintains a clear head and is able to fight back with his wit. This is yet another reason why I get annoyed when I see Wei Wuxian characterized as an idiot or someone who isn’t very smart. He proves his wit in just about every scene, so I don’t know why he gets this reputation in fanon. I feel like it’s derived from some overused yaoi/shojo trope where the “girl” has to be less smart than the “guy.” I don’t know how many things I’ve watched and read with a scatterbrained (but not charming) female lead—it’s overused.
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This is so cool, because Wei Wuxian is scared out of his mind—he’s terrified of being left to die in the Burial Mounds. He’s heard all the stories: people don’t return, their souls get torn apart, etc. But what is cool is that he turns everything around and makes this place his source of power. He’s the man who conquered the Burial Mounds. It’s very satisfying to see that. FYI, I’m not going to talk about how he falls for like 20 minutes.
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But I do think it’s really cool how the dark spirits catch him (and that’s all I’ll say).
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This part still gives me major chills: you hear so many people calling out Wei Wuxian’s name, and then a “Wei Ying” breaks through. My breath always catches in my throat the first time I hear it. And then you hear it again, and the other voices have faded away before you hear it a third time. And that all feels nice until the screaming starts, which is hard to listen to, let alone hard to watch Wei Wuxian go through the mental turmoil.
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Lan Wangji is back, bitches! He’s got a new title, a new headdress, and he’s hotter than ever. Jokes aside, though, this entrance is beyond epic. Other than that tiny glimpse of him in the last episode, it’s been ages since we’ve seen him, and it’s so satisfying that we get this great entrance, walking up this enormous staircase. Obviously by this point, I’m ecstatic to see him (it’s been way too long). Everything about this scene is great, from his entrance, to the way he uses his guqin as a spiritual tool, to the way he and Jiang Cheng are now a team. I don’t think there’s an awful lot of comradery there, but they have a common goal: find Wei Wuxian.
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So we’re not really used to seeing a ton of emotion from Lan Wangji. Even when he’s annoyed, he doesn’t tend to show it. But, man, he is pissed here. Because of the magic of fiction, he’s probably heard the Wens’ conversation as he was walking up the stairs, so he heard them mocking Wei Wuxian (and the Yunmeng Jiang Sect), and he is not happy about it. He even uses the Chord Assassination Technique right off the bat against at least two of the Wen soldiers. Lan Wangji means business, and he’s not leaving until he gets what he wants.
The other great thing is that he doesn’t even need to come up all the way. He defeats them at a distance, while he’s still on the stairs. And the power and respect he commands is so great that they all know him by his face.
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What Wen Chao does here is so relatable. His girlfriend is freaking out, having nightmares, convinced Wei Wuxian is going to turn into a ferocious ghost and haunt them until they lose their minds, and he, of course, rationalizes: they’ve sent so many people to the Burial Mounds and none of them have ever come back. In other words, “You’re being ridiculous.” But when he turns away from her, you can see the fear in his own eyes. When something spooky happens, my first step is always to rationalize—there’s a logical explanation for most things, right? And it always makes you feel better to rationalize it to someone else, but when you’re alone and thinking, your mind starts to wonder, your imagination starts to go wild. It’s easy to psyche yourself up in the dark and quiet of the night.
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There’s this really gorgeous cello version of “Wuji” playing during this scene—it’s so beautiful, so moving, hitting me right in the feels. The look on Lan Wangji’s face when Jiang Cheng is telling him about how he and Wei Wuxian were supposed to meet in Yiling, how he thought Wei Wuxian had abandoned him to meet up with Lan Wangji in Lanling—he looks so defeated there. Defeated despite taking down the Qishan Indoctrination Bureau. Defeated because he hasn’t found who he’s been searching for. And then he holds Suibian so tenderly and lovingly—I’m emotional, okay?
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It’s really cute and heartwarming to see Jin Zixuan starting to fall for Jiang Yanli. We’ve known for quite some time how Yanli feels for him, so it’s quite satisfying to see his walls come down as he starts to care more and more about her. He becomes protective of her. When she gasps at the hanging head at the gates of Qinghe, his instinct is to hold her—of course, he stops himself, but it’s very obvious that he wants to comfort her physically (and not in a dirty way, get your minds out of the gutter).
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I love the dichotomy here: on one end, you have Jin Zixuan asking Lan Wangji where Wei Wuxian is, while you have Jiang Yanli echoing that on the other end with Jiang Cheng. Jiang Cheng can’t answer—he’s crying, trembling, emotionally responding to his sister without speaking. And Lan Wangji can’t speak either. His lips part, but no words come out. Again, you get this great sense of defeat from him—he’s completely at a loss, but he can’t or chooses not to show those emotions.
It’s also interesting how they kind of clipped the reunion between the Yunmeng Jiang siblings in favor of showing the conversation between Jin Zixuan and Lan Wangji. In my opinion, it’s to remind us of the reunion that isn’t happening right now—the one that should have been—the one between Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian. And why isn’t it happening? The conversation reminds us that he’s still missing. I don’t doubt the importance of the Yunmeng Jiang siblings in this story—they are obviously instrumental to the plot and to Wei Wuxian—but it’s choices like this where the writers/scene directors remind us that the relationship to focus on is the one between Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji. Lan Wangji, and not Jiang Cheng, holds onto Suibian, the only remaining item that is most spiritually connected to Wei Wuxian. Isn’t that interesting?
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“A-Cheng, you’ve grown up. As your sister, there’s nothing I can do but worry about you.” Such a wise line—such a sad line. This really brings out how powerless she feels in the lives of her brothers. She’s a bystander, she has no influence. All she can do is watch and worry, and nothing either of them says or does will change that. It’s something we as parents and caretakers and guardians at some point have to admit: we can’t control our children’s lives, we can’t control those we take care of. Once they reach a point in their lives, it’s them who has to make their own decisions. They must thrive on their own, they must fail on their own. And all we can do is watch and worry and hope for the best. God, Yanli breaks my heart.
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Me in bed when I watch a scary movie any time of the day.
She does crazy so well, though.
Other episodes: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 |
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Text
Random Wanda Vision Thoughts--
Episode 1: I am an emotional bitch crying at Wanda and Vision saying “i do” at the end of episode 1, like can these babies please catch a break? they just want to be happy. 
Also Agnes and the 70′s show mom are my favorite wtf. 
STARK TOASTERS I SEE YOU. 
WHO IS WATCHING THEM WTF 
Episode 2: 
Dottie should die, she seems like the type who needs gently run over by a bus
WHO IS IN THE RADIO
Elizabeth Olsen is so cute in this, absolutely adorable 
IS THAT DAVID SCHWIMMER PLAYING THE PIANO
Vision is drunk from getting gum in his gears, I’m actually cackling right now. 
Tiny bit culty with the “for the children” thing, huh? Yikes
BABY BUMP! 
Some creepo decides to get in on their world and Wanda literally went “i think the fuck not, let’s try this again and this time in technicolor” 
is that the cop who asked out Ant Man on the radio?
The difference in “sitcom” Wanda who is happy in her world and “real life” Wanda when she realizes something isn’t right is honestly astonishing and Grade A Face Acting. See what happens when they let women do more on screen then walk around in tight clothes with full lips parted in a sexy pout? 
Episode 3: 
Seventies Vision’s hair is ENDING ME, I can’t even deal with that. 
IT HAS TO BE DAVID SCHWIMMER except he looks like “russ” from friends instead of “ross” 
Poor Vision is not handling impending fatherhood well 
COMIC BOOK NAME DROP BILLY AND TOMMY I LOVE IT 
Poor pregnancy fritzing Wanda. DID WANDA JUST GLITCH A TIME ERASE AND NOT MEAN TO? Listen, I did not expect to love them as a couple this much. EW HER WATER BROKE OMG 
A STORK 
Oh Wanda, poor baby she’s so afraid, I write way too much fan fiction about how all these characters are secretly terrified to go through life alone to be okay with this. 
Why did I start crying immediately when the babies were born, I’m too emotional for this. She is so beautiful and Vision is so soft meeting his son as himself, oh my gosh. THE TWIN SCREAMS while the other twin comes omg this is Grade A Sitcom bullshit. 
The doctor knows something is Up and so do Herb and Agnes. *don’t be suspicious, don’t be suspicious*
...have we actually seen Ralph and I’m just blanking on it? WHY DON’T THEY LIKE GERALDINE? WHO IS SHE?
Oh no i’m crying again over pietro and the sokovian lullaby. Don’t let me watch this while I’m PMSing wtf this is torture. GERALDINE KNOWS ABOUT ULTRON
OH SHIT WANDA IS PISSED LOOK AT THAT DANGEROUS LADY. that head tilt is fucking lethal. 
I love agnes oh man. I know because of spoilers she’s something of a bad guy? but I love her
WHAT HAPPENED TO GERALDINE OMG DID WANDA KILL HER
Oh no, not dead. Just kicked tf out of the bubble. I just realized the symbol is for Sword. Is this some sort of experiment to keep Wanda contained post Endgame? I should have read more spoilers, I’m fucking confused. 
Episode 4: OH HOLY SHIT IT’S MONICA RAMBEAU AND IT’S POST EG SNAP OH MY GOSH SHE HAS NO IDEA SHES BEEN GONE FOR FIVE YEARS MY HEART IS BREAKING MY HEART IS BREAKING I CAN’T TAKE IT 
It IS the cop that hit on Ant Man! WHAT DO THEY MEAN WESTVIEW DOESN’T EXIST 
Oh it’s Darcy! Damn straight it’s Dr. Lewis. How very shocking, a woman was the one to show a room full of Ridiculous Men what’s going on?
ZOMBIE VISION OH MY GOD “no we can’t” oh man she is starting to CRACK and Vision knows something is wrong OH NO 
At this point I should point out that I am 1000% surprised at the quality of the show and 1000% pleasantly surprised by how much I’m enjoying it. The bar for Wanda’s character development was literally subterranean, but this is has been frankly sort of amazing?? 
Episode 5
Agnes asking about “taking it from the top” WHAT. I love so much the way the characters “break character” it’s so interesting and well done! WHY IS WANDA LYING TO VISION. 
WHERE IS RALPH
oh my god the babies are children now?? why isn’t agnes noticing?? THEY’RE SO CUTE I COULD CRY ALL OVER AGAIN 
I do not. trust. hayward. Why is he asking about Wandas nickname? Monica knows whats up-- she knows Wanda is grieving and hurting. 
THE VISIONS CORPSE WHAT? WHAT IS WANDA DOING OH MY GOD SHE STOLE VISION. Vision has a living will? Don’t you have to be human for that? Are you telling me the woman that loved Vision would straight up ignore his wish to not be turned into a weapon after his death? I have a hard time with this. 
Oh no Vision is starting to worry me. He’s onto Agnes, he’s noticing Wanda getting careless...the boys are adorable though. Good on Agnes for not even flinching. 
DAMN RIGHT WANDA COULD HAVE TAKEN OUT THANOS LETS HAVE SOME RESPECT PEOPLE. Also, why is Monica being sketchy about Captain Marvel? 
EMAIL ALERT EMAIL ALERT “none of it is real.” oh my god what is happening?!?!
“Is this yours?” OH MY GOD. “This will be your only warning” she is so unafraid and I love her for it. I love her accent coming back when she breaks characters LOOK AT HER TURNING ALL THOSE MEN AROUND I LOVE HER. 
“Fix the dead” oh my god the shock on her face. The absolute irony of her trying to tell her boys there’s rules when she’s writing the playbook as she goes. Oh my god. “Can’t I?” Jesus, then the credits start rolling because she wants the episode to be over but Vision won’t let her OH MY GOD. My heart is breaking
WHAT DOES IT MEAN SHE DOESN’T KNOW 
SHE RECAST PIETRO
Episode 6
OOOOH look at the classic costumes! Pietro is slaying me. I mean, it’s the wrong pietro but its still very funny. The way Vision calls her out and then plays it off is.... spooky. She is fully aware thats not her brother. “Be good.” holy shit. 
Look at me not liking Hayward again. “which one is the sassy best friend” i feel like that’s....racist. “don’t use the last five years as an excuse to be a coward” DRAG HIM SIS 
Listen Uncle Pietro being a little shit head is my favorite. I use the OG Pietro in my fics but this one is hilarious. 
Vision lied about being on duty? Yikes. The one house where people are stuck in a loop? YIKES. Its crazy how everyone is starting to be super aware of Wanda pulling the strings--MAGIC CHILD OMG. 
Whats past ellis avenue? Is that the limit of Wanda’s powers? I don’t super understand how Vision has his powers if he’s technically dead. HE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT THE AVENGERS ARE she really just gave him enough life to exist just barely. Agnes knows he’s dead so she wasn’t snapped??
Agnes’s witchy laugh while dressed like a witch is legit awesome. We call that FOREEEEEEEEESHADOWING! Oh and there’s Ellis Ave. Got it. 
Monica’s blood is changed?? Idk how to feel about Black Character willing to die for White Charaxter? I mean I know Wanda should be Jewish but still. Uncomfortably close to icky tropes but maybe I’m reading too far into it.
YIKES where was she hiding the kids till now? How’d she do all this? “I’m not a stranger or your husband” YIKES.
OH MY GOD DEAD PIETRO
OH MY GOD VISION STAY IN THE BUBBLE SOMEONE SAVE HIM SAVE HIM OMG BILLY CAN HEAR HIS DADDY DYING SAVE HIM
“The people need help” oh Vision you are truly Worthy
She literally expanded her world to save him omg
DARCY WHERED YOU GO geez look at power of this girls mind it’s about damn time we got a glimpse at just how intense her powers are
Season 7
Ok is this like a reality show? Oh man she is GLITCHING.
Oh no it’s just Wanda not Wanda vision cos she feels alone? So sad. She really is losing it isn’t she and not in a “lol how awkward” sortnof way but in that truthful hard to watch way that so many of us feel when we’re at the breaking point
“I actually did bite a kid once” I literally ugly laughed right there
I KNEW I COULDNT TRUST HAYWOOD
It’s so nice to see Darcy used in a real way. Her character was totally wasted in Thor
The way Wandas little interviews get more and more sad :(
Uhhh what does that mean Agnes is quiet on the inside? Again with the Ralph thing. I’m starting to think there’s no Ralph at all??
LOOK AT THIS GIRL WITH HER SPACE ROVER . She’s got that same look of determination her mama had. WHAT IS HAPPENING TO HER WHY ARE HER EYES BLUE
“....soooo Wanda killed me?” I’m ugly laughing again and I shouldn’t be but the comedic delivery is excellent. The whole “office” vibe with the cameras is making an otherwise devastating episode fairly funny
LOOK AT THIS GIRL STANDING UP TO WANDA we love a sharp cheekbones beauty
“Maybe I already am” I mean, I would have loved to hear that post Ultron when for some reason everyone blamed Tony for everything?? But hearing it now is just horrifying and I hate it
Oh vision deciding to go get to his wife is beautiful.
WHERE ARE THE BABIES WHERE ARE THE BOYS OH MY GOD IM FREAKING OUT WHAT BASEMENT THATS NEVER GOOD
Uh hey what the fuck is up with Agness creepy basement of horrors??
AGATHA HARKNESS OH MY GOD
This song is a BOP wtf she deserves an Emmy for this shit
Snoopers gonna snoop what?
Episode 8
Of course it’s Salem, where else would a witch story start
“They simply bent to my power” What a queen
lmaoooo THAT ACCENT COMES AND GOES Agatha really said what we’ve all been thinking
Wait so Wandas power drew Agatha in? I thought maybe Agatha trapped her here?? SHE DOESNT KNOW WHAT WANDA IS
THE BABIES
Oh ouch this trip down memory lane is gonna hurt me isn’t it?
Oh no her mama I’m dying inside send help. The TV sitcoms. Oh my god is this her last memory before her parents died. HELP ME I CANT WATCH THIS
Oh my god, she had powers when she was little?? SHES NOT AN EXPERIMENT???
Listen I generally think telling a story retroactively is lazy writing? Just give us a well developed story the first time?? But this is BRUTAL and brutally well done.
SHE SAW HERSELF IN THE MIND STONE???
Would it have been so difficult for them to give us even a PEEK at this version of wanda vision in CACW? Marvel has the worst habit of just popping up like “oh hey these two love each other all the sudden with no real reason for it” but this is wonderful. So much character development.
Oh listen to this woman begging to be able to bury her husband omg. WAIT SO SHE DIDNT BREAK IN AND TAKE HIM?? WHAT ARE THEY DOING TO VISION?? DID HE PUSH HER INTO THIS PSYCHOTIC BREAK?? HE TOTALLY PLAYED HER INTO RECREATING VISION SHE JUST WANTED CLOSURE. He literally showed her visions dismembered corpse and said “say goodbye” I will kill this dude wtf
“I can’t feel you” guys I have to pause this so I can cry for a minute
“I can’t feel you” and then she leaves. Totally alone in the world. My heart is an empty husk.
Why the house though? Why west view?
OH FUCK ME UP ARE YOU KIDDING ME VISION WAS GOING TO BUILD THEM A HOUSE I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE
It’s not even real vision? Just the projection of her broken heart? “Welcome home” I am broken. Physically broken.
CHAOS MAGIC
SCARLET WITCH
I CANNOT
OH MY GOD WHITE VISION??? NO NO NO
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seijorhi · 3 years
Text
asks :))
what i have learned today is that y’all wanna get fucked by some monsters...
What does nostos mean? What language is it in? 🤔 also I of course loved it, mind blown as usual queen
it’s ancient greek! it means homecoming, the idea of a triumphant return home for the hero after a long journey. i found it through looking at the root of nostalgia. in this fic of course it’s kind of a grim tongue in cheek play on it. the reader’s coming back to the mountains, but she’s running away after a bad breakup, and the welcome she gets is... shall we say less than ideal haha
Just read nostos-
First of all as a person who reads monster shit- hell ya. Mhm. That’s some good shit right there. That was DELICIOUS horror. It actually had me a bit nervous and afraid to read what was gonna happen next 😳
Secondly- omg I wanna know what happened next (at the end) 👀 know what I mean??? 😼
ANYWAY AS ALWAYS you never disappoint and your writing is fantastic (if/when you write horror yandere stuff again I’ll be there- frothing at the mouth. A+++++ work ILY💖)
you want me to write the monster porn, just say it bby ghfjdkshgfjkd but ty
Omfg that fic was so good!
Did the readers mom know about monster kuroo?? Or was she just worried because of the previous murder? And did Kuroo somehow manipulate reader into coming back to the forest or was it just a big coincidence? (👁👄👁 there's no such thing as a coincidence)
Looking forward to your future work <3
ty nonnie!! i didn’t have the right space for it, but after kohsuke was ripped apart and eaten kuroo stayed by the reader’s side until late in the night, only disappearing when he heard the reader’s parents/search party approaching. they found her lying in pools of blood (and scattered half eaten body parts), shaking and unresponsive – they knew no animal could’ve done something like that. so they knew something lurked in those woods, but considering the reader had repressed the memories, her mom couldn’t just come out and say it <33
You are an AMAZING horror writer!!!
The uneasiness I got from the conversations with the mom is just *chefs kiss*
A+++++
ahh thank you!! horror is such a hard genre to write because i’m never sure if the suspense and everything’s gonna hit right haha
I read Nostos before going to sleep last night and at the time I was like “sure hope this doesn’t give me nightmares” and thankfully it didn’t lol. But I think I’m willing to take that chance again because it’s so GOOD and I think I’m just going to have to relive it – @ohno-otome
fhdjgbfhjkdfn i’m glad it didn’t give you nightmares bby!! but i also appreciate that haha, i’m an absolute wimp with scary movies and stuff but i just can’t stop watching them haha
I just wanna say that I was listening to "You're a psychotic villain playlist" on youtube while reading Kuroo's oneshot and I can't explain the emotions I felt, but I'd let Kuroo do things to me asdfghjkl – @itishebihime-samaforyou
ooh nice! sometimes the right playlist makes things doubly as fun haha
OH MY GOD!?!?! Nostos was soooo GOOD?!?!? Like it was so creepy (but in a good way), and scary and suspenseful!! And the ending!?!? Omggg honestly one my fav fics from you!! You did my mans Kuroo justice 🥺💖💕
TYYYYYYY i was genuinely concerned i was gonna scare everybody off haha
Ah! The new fic! Chiefs kiss! Magnificent! Bravo!🧚‍♀️✨🧞‍♀️🦖🦭🌹💫
tysm nonnie!!! <33
i’m pretty sure i’m in the same/similar timezone as you? and i do be staying up late to be one of the first to read your fics (i usually stay up late anyways). so imagine my surprise when i see you post in the afternoon. in conclusion, whether you post to align with your european and american readers’ timezone, my gmt+10 arse will still be one of the first to read your fics. also nostos sjdufigyyjf i have to admit, i recently just found out about monster fucking and nostos scratched the itch😫 i feel bad for kohsuke though
bby i always post at like 2-4 in the morning please get some sleep!! the fics will be there in the morning lmao. i kinda low key forget about my aussie/gmt+10 followers because i think there’s like... 3 of you haha
Honestly if i could give u a dollar everytime i got off to your fics, you'd probably be rich by now
lmao the idea that people find my fics hot enough to get off to still blows my mind lol
your newest kuroo fic was so SO good!! its totally okay if you dont want to answer this so you can keep things ambiguous but is monster kuroo planning on killing the reader after he's...done with them
thank you, bby!! but no, monster kuroo isn’t gonna eat her – he’s had plenty of chances to do that if that’s what he wanted, but he has other plans for the poor reader
RHI, I WANT TO STATE FOR THE RECORD THAT I AM OKAY WITH MORE MONSTER FUCKING IN THE FUTURE. i also want to say im not a monster fucker, but that just feels like a lie at this point. okay, now that that's off my chest, i love it. the mystery, the connections of kuroo to a cat. kuroo's probably gonna go and batter around his prey once they're under his grip like my cat does. hopefully the reader will come out somewhat unscathed, if they are ever allowed to leave 😌 love this, love how different it is, the way kuroo just tries to weasel in. very monster and yandere vibes, very you. have i said i love this yet?? id willingly let him get me drunk on his cock, maybe never leave the peace of the mountains again
‘i want to say that i’m not a monster fucker’ bby the denial will get you nowhere haha. just lean in and embrace it hgfjkdlkfgjnkdl ahh but thank you this is such a sweet ask ILY!!!
Omg omg the monster thing kuroo was in ur latest fic is so familiar to me abdhdmfnjfjf. I remember being told abt a monster with VERY SIMILAR characteristics to it (aka the not being able to go inside a house unless invited and using fire to lure ppl out) AND JFC IT TERRIFIED ME. Esp how when i told ppl around me and they didnt recognize what it was, but it was somehow known to the kid that told me abt it.
(Some ppl thought it was familiar but still didnt know what it was)
Do u know what im talking abt? Hopefully u do
-🥚
GHFJDK so the monster in this is kind of based off the nekomata spirit in japanese folklore - they can appear like people, torment victims by reanimating the corpses of their loved ones, they’ve been blamed for forest fires, so it was just fun to use that as a basis and then go buck wild haha. anyway thanks for the ask bby!
Rest In Peace Kohsuke, you would’ve loved Haikyuu season 5😔✊– @joyvstheworld
poor kohsuke deserved better, i’m just mean to the oc’s i throw into fics haha
Monsterfucking ❤❤❤❤❤❤ a little annoyed you're making me simp for yan Kuroo though (a vibe tho tbh). You're so extremely talented!!!! &
This is probably a stupid question, but how did Kageyama react when he couldn't find y/n? How is life with yan Suga? I imagine probably awful BUT yknow maybe the stockholm syndrome set in fast lmao. Sorry, I'm going on a binge reading your stuff. - @oracleofdin
i will not apologise for making you simp for kuroo he deserves it the man’s a snacc. and as far as your second question, suga’s a very caring, very smothering kinda yandere, so i guess in some ways it’s better than what the reader had with kageyama but... pick your poison haha
That was so good. I’m so shook rn I can’t comprehend anything but how good that was and how good a writer you are
TYSM NONNIE!!! <33
Ok, so, I just read Final Girl and the lil' ticket addition to it and just---
Well, ok I've been playing Dead by Daylight a lot lately? And I'm just picturing Tetsu as the newest killer "The Trickster" and I'm positively RANDY.
Your writing is ALREADY thirst inducing and just as satisfying, but this has SENT ME- If you're not familiar, please...
https://youtu.be/iowkiPobYYQ
Understand my thirst. (I'd also like to clarify, I use a different skin for him that gives him black hair and he looks like Kuroo with an undercut.)
~ @the-casual-hedonist 🌸
i love how feral y’all got for final girl kuroo. like bo and akaashi had his fans, but i put a spiked bat in kuroo’s hands and y’all lost your goddamn minds and i love to see it. fghdjkvhfjdkls thanks for the ask bby
idk why but I love preggo reader as long as I don't pretend it's me 😢✋ I hate babies n pregnancy anywhere else other than horny haikyuu fics
i think that’s a valid thing for a lot of fans. the idea of breeding is sexy, the actual getting pregnant and having a kid thing... not so much. but especially with non-con scenario’s, it’s more about the aspect on control than the actual desire to have kids. but yeah, i feel you
Sorry to bother but uh was just wondering in fracture did Osamu kill his wife or was it actually an “unfortunate event” ? Love your work btw!!
he most certainly did :))
LMFAO RHI i totally get not liking cheating/infidelity fics (towards reader) bc IT HIRTS ME SO BAD I CANNOT HANDLE THOSE.
id be reading fics those fics like: tf you mean my yandere aimt gonna baby me and only want me??🤨🤨🤨⁉️‼️
EXACTLY! listen i get that it’s a fucked up fantasy, but in my fucked up fantasy you damn well better have the decency to be loyal smh
Finders keepers is the most beautiful thing I've read by you: I read it twice like I normally do and here's what I figured out the second time (that's when I analyze it and find the little tidbits of things that are much darker than they appear (: )
To start I LOVE THE DETAILS OF THEM NEVER TEACHING READER ANYTHING- at first I assumed "oh they might see her as a little sister or child or something" but realized thAT WAS THE ISSUE!! they infantilize her and isolate her from everyone but her group. the small details like that are what make the story amazing 😎💅
ahh thank you so much, nonnie!! pls this is making me soft 🥺
I just wanted to stop by and say that I love your writing and I hope you're doing well!!! Drink plenty of water and keep up the amazing work :) but seriously you're one of the best fanfic writers I've seen on tumblr! I read your "Imitation" piece about kuroo and i keep coming back to it, it's so good! I did want to ask if you think it'd be possible for the reader to ever escape with the baby (or at least attempt to). Or if Kenma would "help" at all just to put an end to kuroo's antics lmao
kenma would in no way help the reader, and tbh by that point if kuroo did get her pregnant, she’d be far too emotionally dependant on him to actually even want to leave, but thanks for the ask!
You know who I think would be a perfect Yandere in the JJK world? Choso.
🚨Spoilers Ahead🚨
After being locked in a glass jar for however long he was, and all that happened with his brothers, I feel like he would absolutely never let his darling out of his sight. He would be possessive. Obsessive. And Oh So delusional. Sure he’d be your anything - he truly is a softy - but to what end?🤤
choso would make an excellent yandere, ngl 😌
what au/troupe of your fav character(s) that you have written do you like the most?
(rlly hope this makes sense🙏)
i am always a slut for soulmate au’s :))
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animatedrapture · 3 years
Note
I HAVE GASOLINE LAYING AROUND IN MY HOUSE AND IM OMW TO SET KANA ON FIRE :))))
ok im about to compile possibly like 10 chapters worth of kana hate KJHLDSDJS
so. sorry i wasnt able to respond to so manyyyyyy of these on time and all, i get overwhelmed super easily but i truly, truly love all of you and appreciate each msg :DD these have all either made me think real hard LMFOAHJSKD or had me laughing so hard and gasping lmfao. but yeah, i appreciate all of these and everything i mightve never gotten bc tumblr asks is dumb as well as the ones ive still yet to come back to or answer. almost each and every single one of these have been a guidance with what i wanted to do with the smau, whenever i wanted to switch something up or make something better in the smau, your msgs helped a lot in improving it in some way and helping me figure out what i truly wanted to do with the smau and for that, thank u!!!
Anonymous asked:
FUCK KANA ALL MY HOMIES HATE HER HANA SPILLED HER DRINK ON HER? SHE DID THE RIGHT THING ALSO FUCK SUNA BC EVEN UF HE HAD SEX WITH YN AND SAID HE ADORES HER HIS ACTIONS/AFFECTION TOWARDS KANA GIVES MIXED SIGNALS AND ITS TIME HE GET ACCOUNTABLE OF SAID ACTIONS sorry for the rant 🥴
Anonymous asked:
the “tw kana” absolutely sent me into orbit i cackled 😭
Anonymous asked:
anons bonding over kana hate🤝🏻🤝🏻🤝🏻
Anonymous asked:
yeah its only you who doesn't dislike her FGHDJGKUJ IM KIDDING no but really more than hate her its hate the way shes in between like it pisses me off the cockblock she is 😭😭
Anonymous asked:
if i were kana,,,i would either tell him i still have feelings OR hurt in silence (step back) since technically he or should i say they decided to be JUST bestfriends not cockblocking the possibility for him to be in a relationship
Anonymous asked:
kana has to make a choice: she confess or shut the fuck up bc as far as we know they decided to be just bff (highkey think suna was more into being just friends and kana kinda lied) so IF he likes someone else why the fuck try to sabotage him (his happiness with someone else) when he find it out then what? would he still keep her as a friend? 🧐
Anonymous asked:
What if I just...shift or whatever you guys call it, into As Friends universe...and bonk Kana on the head...lol just kidding...ah ha ha ha No please she is starting to sound like the girl best friend that would make couples break up because she does not care about boundaries...honey, you're the best friend, yes, you're important, but that's his girlfriend...stay in your lane. Lol like "I don't want to confess" but "He's mine so I have to get rid of all competitions" lol fucking clown yeah no, I don't have to wait for you to write more about her to make me hate her sksksksksk I already do
Anonymous asked:
Ayo istg kana's been giving y/n the stinky eye... if she stares at y/n like that one more time LAWD HELP HER SOUL, im coming for her eyes!!! But fr,, Rin better treat y/n right and put kana in her place. Bc y/n got a best friend too (samu) u^u and he can cook and would treat her good.
Anonymous asked: likE I KEEP SAYING eAT SHIT KANA
Anonymous asked: I am CRAVING IMMENSE VIOLENCE bring that girl kana here lemme knock her teeth down her throat. >:(
Anonymous asked:
kana (derogatory)
Anonymous asked:
istg if a bus doesn’t hit kana i’m gonna do it
Anonymous asked:
kana toxic best friend it’s time for suna to realise IT 😤😤
Anonymous asked:
kana has family problems only rin knows about? what in the ao haru ride manga 😐
Anonymous asked:
WHY KANA FUKC
Anonymous asked:
NAH MY GUT FEELING TELLING ME KANA WAS BAD NEWS SINCE THE BEGINNING also she wants suna all to herself (he sees her as a bff) but doesn’t say shit to him... if course he’s gonna find someone in the future whether in college or after (unless the bitch will still to his ass even when he goes pro)
Anonymous asked:
everyday i wake up with notifs from u i feel like im about to get subjected to pain and IM RIGHT THIS TIME TOO what the hell kana u will never be yn (me) 🙏🏼🧇
Anonymous asked:
bro part of me wants to punch suna so bad bc like hes so awkward but so smooth like who tf do u want stop being a smooth ass mf u know these two bitches like u
Anonymous asked: i might just obliterate everyone named kana cause of as friends THE WHOLE TIME MY EYE WAS TWITCHING CAUSE OF HER FUCK KDDSKDLSDK EVERYONE WHO WANTS TO OBLITERATE HER SAY "I" but like hi! i hope youre well
Anonymous asked:
even tho u always insist you'd never het mad at me girl HUHH i used to be genuinely good w kana now she's just a manipulative bitch :// kana babe sorry but ur best friend is allowed to spend time with other people 🙄
xmyshya asked:
I 👏 love 👏 Hana 👏 Also 👏 fuck 👏 Kana 👏 and Rin you idiot, what do you mean he's not gonna pursue dating T_T it's just a few chapters till the end T_T wut T_T
yourstarvic asked:
Kana needs to back up before she gets beat up 😤 me and my homies ain’t playing no more 😤
Anonymous asked:
omg that ur probably mad (even tho u said u’d never get mad at me!) broooo
Anonymous asked:
kana gonna get even more territorial in the next chapters im getting kinda scared to see how rin reacts 😒 shes gonna lowkey (highkey) manipulate rin like oh u said youll never leave me you said i come first and all that mhmmm girl dont make me break your neck 👎🏼👎🏼
Anonymous asked:
huh so is kana basically a pick me girl
Anonymous asked:
“you’d be selfish abt this” girl
Anonymous asked:
why tf kana gotta ask yn bro u don't know her just ask suna directly 🙄 putting her in an awkward ass position how's she supposed to say no i'm sorry kana's being annoying as hell rn
Anonymous asked:
it’s time for kana to realise: - yn aint just a fling bc suna is spending more time with her - suna clearly sees her just as his bff
Anonymous asked:
Kana saying "I was worried you'd be selfish about this haha" well bitch now I gotta be 😒
Anonymous asked:
“i was worried you’d be selfish about this hahaha” -the one who’s for the streets kana better watch herself…y/n was being kind, i will not be
Anonymous asked:
DID KANA REALLY HAVE THE NERVE TO ASK US?????? TO POSTPONE OUR PLANS WITH RIN???? pls that « you understand, right? » was just so manipulative oh my god-
Anonymous asked:
kana can go cry & write to her diary about it 😘😘
Anonymous asked:
“y/n right?” after literally meeting her plssss
Anonymous asked:
miss kana is just gonna have to miss him a little more bc i'm not canceling SHIT!!
Anonymous asked:
kana is playing chess while we’re playing checkers
Anonymous asked:
everytime you post and kana gets fucked over my day is made and it all I'm going to think about
Anonymous asked:
im catching up on as friends bc i havent read a few chapters and kana saying “arent you just with yn” made me extra angry go trip down some stairs kana
Anonymous asked:
u made my week with the update 😭🖤 i hate kana sfm lol
Anonymous asked:
kana suffering either way the story goes? I'm in -🦄
Anonymous asked:
kana n suna need to grow up lowkey it’s very highschool
Anonymous asked:
WHOEVER SENT THIS I AM CHOOSING VIOLENCE who's in, let's go beat kana-🦄
Anonymous asked:
hELL YEAAHH GET FUCKED KANA /neg
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mevekagvain · 3 years
Text
Chapter 93 - Fancy chair, love it.
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- So my theory is that Raizel just never learnt how to write in Lukedonian either.
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- Tbh the janitor is suspicious. Like how hard was he googling M-21?
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Chapter 94 - SUYIIIIIIIIIIII
- Ah geez the first of the racistly depicted characters.
Chapter 96 - Suyi getting mad at the kids for complaining about Hansu is so funny like when she first appears you think she's perhaps a stuck up celebrity or a pushover but it turns out she's just a really sweet friend.
- Suyi being stunned by Rai's looks but not falling for him (same with Yuna) is one of the things I always liked about Noblesse. Like sure in the first meeting they get blushy but I'll just jot that down to the inherent beauty of nobles since I can't relate to it at all.
Chapter 97 - Frankenstein's house always being stocked with so much food because the kids just started coming over daily is hilarious. Even funnier since Frankenstein obviously thinks it's overkill but is the one stocking up anyway.
Chapter 98 - Regis and Seira 🥺 Seira's og outfit was the best one she had like it only goes downhill from here folks.
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Chapter 99 - It would have been so funny if Frankenstein went "they must be cosplayers" instead of realising the two were nobles.
- Regis taking all the initiative shows how it's his roadtrip coming of age journey which is pretty clever. Also Seira's just like that but still.
- Shinwoo stop exercising in class bro. Do not flex on the rest of us this is so rude 😭😭😭
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- Regis confidently saying he's a noble in class to humans he doesn't plan on mind controlling... Baby boy why are you so dumb? How is this hiding your identity??? And Seira just lets him,,, good for her.
Chapter 100 - Ah yes their elegance boner at seeing Raizel... nobles are so fucking weird.
- M-21 thinking he won't get any information because of his time at the Union and thus being surprised at how open Frankenstein is is actually really sweet. Like yeah I still think Frankenstein is an unethical and questionable person but he is kind to most humans (werewolves and nobles can go fuck themselves I guess lmao).
Chapter 101 - The second hand embarrassment I felt when M-21 called the two noblesse... how do I even consume content?
- Yeah 100% most union members don't know the difference between nobles and vampires. I bet they'd classify jiangshi as either mutants or werewolves. Or to be more specific, that would be the classification given to low leveled members. On one hand I think it's dumb that the Union gives members twisted information because how would they even use it? But on the other hand it makes sense since it prevents said members from seeking nobles for help. After all, if they believe even the 'noblesse' are vampires that drink blood, than obviously they won't see them as possible escape routes.
- 'Noblesse only applies to one person'. Yeah because Rai's brother is fucking dead. And so is whoever was his predecessor/parent.
Chapter 102 - Those bullies got backup so fucking fast like Shinwoo literally just asked Regis and Seira if they were okay then boom! They're back.
Chapter 103- Regis going ??? essentially when Shinwoo tells him to take care of Seira is so funny like yes ofc he's confused she's literally a clan leader + noble females aren't physically weaker + noble women work out just like the men.
- Rude, Regis. You can't just ask someone why they're mingling among humans. You're doing that too. Who doesn't mingle among humans smh. Even cats and pigeons mingle with us.
Chapter 105 - Love how everyone else in the household is so sick of ramyeon like Raizel stop please you're being selfish.
Chapter 106 - Frankenstein is the definition of the 'right in front of my salad?' meme at Regis and M-21 arguing at the dinner table. Then there's Seira and Raizel just waiting for the noodles to get soggy so he can't even eat. Wish Urokai could see him getting tortured like this.
- The soldier rejecting backup because he knows the enemy is the Union hurts my heart. Wanting to prevent casualties... iwi
Chapter 107 - Shark how tf do you not know about South Korea? That's one of the asian countries people actually know about. I guess maybe it's because this is from around a decade back? K-pop is more recent and made the country more visible I guess.
- Ah yes Takeo. Forever known as "the first time I read Noblesse and he appeared I thought he was Marie's sister since they had the same hairstyle". Like I thought that before even learning about the Aris Taivra fiasco. My power 😔
- Oh don't worry M-21, Frankenstein stopped experimenting on people 830 years ago. You know, as one does.
Chapter 108 - Shark has like no general knowledge. Geography? History? Tf is that I guess.
- Tao saying they're the worst possible people for the job is so funny like yeah he's right. "All we do is massacre people in warzones why are we in Seoul?"
- The rest of the squad complain or are confused about the peace meanwhile Takeo is vibing. He's the normal guy TM of the group.
- Ah yes noble lore. If you take canon at face value than the fact that nobles were around when humans first emerged and there being about 2-3 clan leaders before the current generation means you can estimate their lifespan. Ofc it differs wildly depending on how you interpret the 'first humans' part. I'll assume there were 3 generations before the current generation (mvp lord being the third generation) and won't be adding the current generation since a 0.5-2k years is kinda meaningless. I'll also be assuming that mvp lord entered eternal sleep at around the same age as his predecessors and that he would have died soon from old age anyway (since canonically they do have limited lifespans). If we assume it's just the first human ancestors (7 million years ago) than the average pureblood lifespan is 2.33 million years. If we assume it's when homo sapiens started to emerge (300k years ago) than it's 100k years. If it's about modern humans (130k years ago) than it's 43.3k years. Regardless I'll ignore it since my hcs are that nobles are effectively immortal unless killed and that the 2-3 clan leaders is a misconception due to a mix of Gechutel just straight up lying, because there are clans that have had fewer clan leaders, because I have nobles settling on Lukedonia only 30k years ago, and because Gechutel is factoring in his own age of 10.2k so it's more like 'There have been 2-3 Ru clan leaders before the Ru clan leader 10k years ago since after we settled in Lukedonia'. There's also the possibility that nobles didn't have lords or clan leaders until a few thousand years ago in canon but the species has existed for much longer.
- 'Nobles are individualistic... They don't despise humans but don't love them either.' Humans w/ ants. Now if the ants were capable of speaking with us it'd be exactly the same situation.
Chapter 109 - "What were they researching here?" Since when does the Union research anything aside from human modifications Kranz? Why do you even need to ask? More seriously this means that the Union doesn't actually only do human experimentation and weapons lmao. The other shit just isn't relevant I guess. It's a shame, I'd have loved to see how a lab focused on like, fixing up polluted waters, would be fit into the story.
- The fact that Tao beat Jake up is never mentioned enough. Also confirms that Jake was lying out of his ass about being the strongest.
- Marie being the weakest assassination squad member is interesting like I know why Crombel doesn't need bodyguards as the reader but you'd think the Union would be suspicious of him not having a stronger bodyguard. Also I still can't believe the Union doesn't bother learning who the members are aside from the ones Crombel tells them about like. Bro???
- Shark calling Takeo uptight is hilarious because the guy literally just shot the falling ceiling light which is the opposite of uptight. Either he was preventing them from getting hurt/being caught or he wanted that to happen considering the fact that he shot it and it shattered. And then he just goes back to leaning against the wall. Takeo please 🤣
Chapter 110 - And Shinwoo's still staying over at Ikhans place. Wonder when he's gonna move back. I really love their dynamic like yeah I beg my sister to get me food all the time too. Also love the apron and skeleton hoodie.
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- Shinwoo went through the five stages of grief pretty quick huh? Like yeah it's his own misunderstanding that Ikhan is dating someone but still. Homophobia is annoying as always though.
Chapter 111 - Suyi paying for their food is so sweet of her and also I relate so much like yeah mood that's me and no I don't want to be paid back.
- Takeo,,, the fact that he just hands his wallet over because he doesn't like violence and doesn't want to beat them up,,, my heart. Otoh... how did he even get cornered in an dark shady alleyway lmao.
- Aris managing to make herself look like a teenager as Taivra is interesting since Takeo says he wants her to be able to go to school like Yuna and Shinwoo when he's treating them. I guess she looks younger without makeup.
- Takeo just straight up pointing his gun at Shark in public because he mentioned Taivra... anger issues much? I understand why but taking your gun out is an overreaction.
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