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telltale-heart173 · 4 months

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I want you to know I have SO MUCH lore for this oc Ive been cooking up so i'm gonna paste what I was telling my friend on the discord here and if some poor soul reads it all they bear the curse of knowledge and binding

I wanted to make them interesting not just lore wise but gameplay wise so it would make sense and work if they were actually ingame [applause

bold claim to assume my little guy is an employee and not a punishment to people who sit on the terminal the entire fucking game because my little guy is actually a little virus that will fucking kill you if youre on the monitor for TOO FUCKING LONG (/j i'm the person who stays behind a lot) meaning as the one who stays behind its an extra threat thats not just "oh watch for dogs past 6pm and the occasional mask" and it makes it more challenging also they dont kill you instantly the first sign would be like a light breaking in the ship and youd have to fix it meaning it takes your attention away from your crewmates meaning you need to be sparse with your usage of the terminal and the longer you sit on it the more the ship breaks and you need to fix things and if you reach 3 "ship problems" (aka letting it roll over and not fixing it) it's them drawing power from the ship to become physical and once they have enough power they reach out and fucking KILL your ass and theyd function just like a masked in the way they'd linger in the ship and hide until the crew gets back wondering why their guy wasnt responding to them and HOLY SHIT ITS THE COMPUTER GUY!! GOD DAMNIT JERRY WE TOLD YOU TO FIX THOSE DAMN SHIP PROBLEMS AND LIMIT YOUR TERMINAL USAGE THIS IS ALL YOUR FAUL [dies

which means that overusing the terminal not only puts yourself at risk it also puts your teammates at risk

and theres many different problems that can ERUPT

heres like a short list of the randomly selected (only one is picked) tier thingies and what they do!!!!

Tier one - You've been looking at the monitor for 10 minutes. 3 seconds to fix and very minor, but don't let it sit for too long. You can still take off with just a tier one malfunction. This tier will always be announced via audio cue, but it isn't very loud, meaning you need to keep in tune with your surroundings. Charging station shutting off will not be noticed if you're glued to the screen.

-Lights shutting off

-Monitor shutting off

-Charging Station shutting off

Tier two - You've been looking at the monitor for 15 minutes, and you have ignored the Tier one malfunction. 5 seconds to fix. You can still take off at this point. This tier will be announced the same way you're told things in game, that little red box in the bottom right "ERROR: [randomly selected tier two thing] MALFUNCTION." This is the FINAL WARNING you get as the person who stays behind.

-Speaker box malfunction (This counts as noise, the eyeless dogs WILL hear it)

-Door controls will malfunction (That'll really suck if you're being chased by something and you can't close the door)

-Terminal Error (You won't be able to purchase anything, won't be able to transmit messages, won't be able to open doors and shut down turrets) ((keep in mind this only affects the terminal, the monitor isn't affected))

Tier three - You have been looking at the monitor for 30 minutes, and have ignored the Tier one and Two malfunctions. 10 seconds to fix. You will not be able to take off until this is fixed. If you are the one that stayed behind, you will die at this point. Crewmates coming back from scavenging will need to deal with the threat and fix at LEAST the tier three problem before they can take off. You can tell what you need to fix here if you hover over the take off lever, instead of "start ship" it will say "[tier three thing] malfunction".

-Engine Failure (Engine can be found under the ship, you will need to crouch to reach it.)

-Power Failure (Monitor, Terminal, and general power will be completely off. You will need to climb the ladder and go on top of the ship to mess with the funny little satellitte dish)

now you may be wondering HOW THE FUCK WOULD SOMEONE COMING BACK FROM SCAVENGING DEAL WITH MY LITTLE GUY BECAUSE THEY'LL BE IN THE SHIP!! so glad you asked theres actually different ways to deal with them that get more effecient the more progress you have in the game

you can fix the problems the ship is having, which'll cause them to dissapear without a power source to draw from (this is one of the harder ones because theyll still be roaming amuck in the ship BUT its one of the beginner friendly ones, can be done without needing to buy anything from the store)

hitting them with the shovel will stun them for a few seconds, you can use that time to fix the ship problems, so either be strategic with your shovel hits or have a teamate just fucking stunlock them while you fix shit.

And then, finally a use to the zap gun if you're playing solo mode, the zap gun will get rid of them INSTANTLY, BUT at the expense of also overloading your ships systems which'll break 2 more things, but they can only be tier two's or one's. you will never have more than one tier three critical failures, aka no two 10 second fixes, so its a bit easier

then finally, you could buy something from the shop in the ship upgrades category

probably like 600. be called like "Reliable Software" or something which means you will never get a tier three failure, BUT you can still die if you get three malfunctions, it'll just replace what would have been tier three with a tier two, less time fixing, and you can start the ship without fixing it!!! still punishes the person who stays behind, really its just for the people who come back to the ship tier three is the only tier that will prevent you from taking off

this is an AMAZING mechanic that really makes staying behind less boring and less "okay get the scrap.......ok opening the door..........watch out red dot....."

because currently the only real threats you have staying behind are the eyeless dogs which only spawn after 6pm (unless its eclipsed) or the masked which have such a low fucking chance of spawning

which means a solid 50% of the time youre just sitting there staring at a monitor

btw when you fix a tier one malfunction the timer resets and the next one will be tier one again

so as long as you get in a good system of fixing them when they happen, its very easy to avoid

the times to fix the malfunctions get longer as the tiers go up as a way to punish the player like "hey remember how you ignored the lights shutting off guess what fucker now you need to fix that AND this other thing thats 8 seconds at LEAST that you cant help your teammates

also in game you can move the lightswitch so one of the problems you can just move to the front of the monitor

so itll take even less time

it only gets annoying if you ignore it and go "bahh i can fix it in a second...."

i really do love this idea, it doesnt feel too out of place of vanilla

and i think it would be so fun to have to work with because as someone who stays behind a LOT

i get bored

fuckin round on experimentation with no mask spawns and dogs only spawn at 6pm so until then youre just kinda sitting there staring at the screen

and even if tier three happens and your monitor guy dies hope is still not lost!!!!!!!!

perchance you come back to the ship and see the smoke coming from either the engine or the satellite dish

youre like god damnit juan you fucking idiot warned you about those malfunctions

its an early warning so you can be like "ok its gonna be in there. need a game plan."

it wont come out of the ship unless it chases you out

so you COULD fix the tier three first

before even going in

then you can deal with the THING and just take off

then fix the minor ones in orbit

and depending on what you have, dealing with the CREATURE is super easy

also if you have literally ass nothing on you, you can lure it out by getting its attention then just fucking sprinting out of the ship so it follows

it kills you in three hits, so its not just an instant kill

meaning you have some loosey goosey leeway to get creative with how you either fix the problems or take off

really theres a lot of ways to fix it, the best thing is the more stuff you have the more effeciently you can handle it

and even withOUT stuff you can still deal with it, its just harder and has more risk, just like everything else!!!

ok look I know the ingame days are like 11 minutes

okay so since i dont plan on implimenting this ingame as a mod at ALL i can say "ermmm well actshually in my oc lore universe a day is an actual fucking day so thats 24 hours 🤓 " so the tier timing still WORKS

i guess if i were to impliment this in game tier one would be every 5 minutes, you have 60 seconds to fix this before tier two happens (6 minutes), and heaven forbid you dont fix THAT in the next two minutes (8 minutes) or youre FUCKED

this leaves 3 minutes to the surviving crew to DEAL WITH the PROBLEM if tier three happens

but whatever

IF YOU'VE UNIRONICALLY MADE IT THIS FAR I LOVE YOU HERES SOME FUN LITTLE DESIGN QUIRKS ABOUT THIS GUY

fun quirks about this design!

-Semi transluscent, has a tv screen effect

-Eye is actually just an enemy dot (themself), if a player approaches them it will show up on their face (hence the 'now monitoring' their face IS the monitor)

-'oxegyn tank' straps show current time and profit quota (they dont have an oxygen tank its what they use as a power storage, if they took it off they'd poof lol)

-Constantly emitting smoke/steam from somewhere, a few wires poking out of places

-also their bestiary entry would just be "entity" if you couldnt tell

i could get into harvard with a paragraph like this

#you dont have to read the lore its like a mile long #but id like it /j #lethal company #lethal company oc #art #artists on tumblr #digital art #oc art #oc #ocs

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januslikesbooks · 4 months

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HELLO and welcome to my rant about the PJO TV show

in honor of season 2 being announced, here is everything i loved and everything that needs to change.

i would like to preface this by saying that while my overall rating for the season was 7.5/10, the rating of each individual episode vary WILDLY, and there are reasons. even so, i still loved the show and cannot wait for season two.

STUFF I LOVED:

THE CASTING <3 <3 they have my whole heart all of them.

percy and sally's relationship

the little allusions to future books

episodes 1-3 *chefs kiss*

the design of the world and the monsters they looked SO GOOD

the changes to the conflicts and interactions, especially medusa and the tunnel of love

LIN MANUEL MIRANDA

the poseidon and sally scene. you know the one.

the gods speaking ancient greek YES

the fact that poseidons mom is proffessor mcgonnegal lmao

2X RICK CAMEOOOO

the dream sequences

oh golly, the roads gettin bumpy cause i got me some friends--

"i am impertinent" DIRECT BOOK QUOTE HELLO

"guess i'll lose my dessert privileges" DIRECT BOOK QUOTE PT. 2 ALSO CLARRISSE?????

the ares fight. i thought it would be cheesy but nope. massive W

the fact that this is my favorite book series <3

okay. now that that's out of the way.

the main problem was the directing.

series that use multiple directors (different ones for different episodes) are never good imo. when you're building a world u can't have clashing perspectives on what that world looks and feels like. bc of this, most of the season just felt empty. the riordanverse is set in our world, yes, but theres such a specific tone and vibe of this world in the books that was entirely absent in the show. the only time i even slightly felt it was in the first two episodes, and, what do u know, those were both directed by James Bobin, a veteran director of kid and teen shows.

on top of that, the structure was entirely too stiff. each episode was obvious: here is a monster, we know exactly who it is, this is why they're bad, and this is how we defeat them (usually with no fight scene, might i add, even tho there were multiple fights in the book). there was no SUSPENSE. every episode felt exactly the same, even though each monster is supposed to give us a different feeling. the first time i truly noticed this was in episode 5. the lotus casino felt SO flat. i was really disappointed, since that situation offers so many feeling and conflicts, and those were all ignored. AND THE BIGGEST MOMENT IN THE SEASON, the luke betrayal, THERE WAS NO BETRAYAL? percy just FIGURES IT OUT??? the fight was great, but that did not sit right with me.

2) why is this written by millenials omfg (and the characterization was off)

dude. percy jackson saying "period" in a serious context is NOT HOW THAT WORD IS COLLOQUIALLY USED. same thing with "i think we're going to have to be detectives here 🤓". These kids are supposed to be gen z in the show. Did they not get ANY gen z readers? or even just longtime fans to approve that yes, these characters are speaking how they're supposed to? im a gen z kid, and this pained me. this leads into my bigger issue with how the characters were depicted. lets talk abt it shall we!

tell my why annabeth chase wasn't a know it all. shes supposed to be the smartest girl in the room, always trying to prove it, not just to other people but herself too, that she comes off as a bossy know it all in the first book and we love her for it. so WHY was percy the one explaining EVERY SINGLE MYTH. go back and watch it. annabeth doesn't explain a single monster, or myth, or situation, or ANYTHING. i LOVE leah sava jeffries and i know she knows what she's doing, but the writing is entirely against her. tell my why the only times i really felt like annabeth's personality was written into the scene was the candy scene, the "are we under arrest", and at waterland. every other little piece of her was offered by leah, not the writers, so THANK YOU to leah sava jeffries and nobody else.

on the flip side of that, percy knew way too much, and they somehow made him clueless about the wrong things? he explained nearly every myth and monster, but couldn't understand that other people also have a bad relationship with their godly parents. like, he was surprised by annabeth and luke when he found out that the gods didn't care, which makes zero sense since he's so angry about his own dad not being in his life? it's really supposed to be the other way around-- clueless about the myth world but sure about parental relationships. i guess i can sort of see how this character change contributes to the plot, but i don't like it.

meanwhile grover has now been diminished to a comedy relief. the only times he did anything substancial was when he tricked ares, and the conclusion of which turned out to be wrong anyways, so there wasn't even any point. (also the getting percy kicked out of school part, which i don't have any critiques of). justice for grover man.

3) why. why is percabeth like this.

okay.

i love percabeth. i think the kids nailed it. i'm loving the slowburn. but why are they changing the relationship trajectory???? again, a writing issue.

one of the biggest and most important scenes, which is even alluded to in later books, is the oreo scene in the Kindness international truck. Missing. annabeth saying "because you're my friend, seaweed brain, anymore stupid questions?" gone. the suspense of not knowing anything about each other and still choosing to protect each other? not the same at all, because annabeth tells him her entire life story in episode 4, and for what? WRITERS, WHY ARE YOU MESSING WITH PERFECTION.

on top of that, some of the other relationships were just not developed enough. i ADORED the sally and little percy flashbacks-- sally percy relationship is on point. but luke and annabeth? annabeth struggled for the whole series with her brother-like figure, who she did everything for, and the understanding that he's now evil. that's a plotline that's super important to me specifically, and we had almost zero buildup of their relationship. and again, for what? that could have been fixed in ONE scene, just one where they're alone and talking to each other (and also, that could have been where we the audience learn a little about annabeths past, instead of changing her character, who's supposed to be very guarded, so tell percy her whole life story after knowing him for like a week). and THEN, the fact that they just skipped from the betrayal to percy leaving? no emotions? no discussion with chiron?? no annabeth realizing she's lost her brother??? i don't understand it.

also, percy and grover. we didn't see enough of their bromance. i don't have specific recipts for this one, just a feeling. i missed their friendship.

anywho.

MY FINAL STATS FOR PJO SEASON 1:

Episode 1: 9.5/10 (would be 10, but gabe wasn't right)

Episode 2 AND 3: 10/10

Episode 4: 6/10

Episode 5: 8/10

Episode 6: 4/10

Episode 7: 7/10

Episode 8: 9/10

writing this was exhausting. if you're still here, tysm, love u

#percy jackson #percabeth #percy jackon and the olympians #percy series #percy jackson tv show

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mxyx-rx444 · 1 year

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Let the Good Times Roll

Sevika x NOLA!reader x Izogie part 1

summary- it's mardi gras down in New Orleans and your lovers decide to participate in its festivities this year, what they don't know is that they're in for a surprise with the style of dancing that's known around this time of year.

(18+) MEN & MINORS DNI!! this is for the sapphics only, mentions of alcohol, drug use (weed), ass shaking, maybe smut??

music to follow along with the story below

(Y/N's POV)

I sat at my vanity finishing up the final touches on my hair, making sure it was straight and checking my make up when my lovers walked into our shared bedroom. "Look at what we have here sevika, a beautiful princess getting all dolled up, what's the special occasion sweetheart?" I heard izogie ask as I made eye contact with her in the mirror. "Yeah, what's the special occasion doll? Did we miss a memo or something? " Sevika chimed in raising a perfect eyebrow in question. "Its Mardi gras, I'm one of the dancers on the floats, are y'all gonna come to the parade this year or stay here and be cooped up inside again?" I questioned my accent heavy on my tongue as I turned to face them. "Dancer? You never told us you dance." Sevika stated as she looked over at izogie who looked just as puzzled as her and shrugged. "Well, it's a...form..of dancin' , y'all are free to come and watch it won't hurt to have fun, it is the most fun holiday in New Orleans after all." I said sending them a wink as I went to put my shoes on. "You dance in that outfit doll? You look amazing though so I'm not complaining." Sevika commented coming behind me to give me a slap on the ass. "The type of dancing I do requires me to be as comfortable as possible baby." I said turning to check my outfit in the body length mirror by the bedroom door. A black long-sleeved crop top that stops right under my boobs paired with black ripped biker shorts and my black platform Converse. "So you two comin' or no? The parade starts in twenty minutes and it takes 10 to walk there since they have the streets blocked off and the streets are crowded." I explained grabbing my bag, making sure theres enough water for the three of us and stuffing a sweater in there. "Why not, we have nothing better to do than sit here all day. What about you sevika?" Izogie asked walking to the front door to put her shoes on. "Sure why not, but the first person to try anything we're leaving, got it?" Sevika said sitting on the couch putting her boots on. "Like anyone would try anything with two 6ft tall intimidating women walking with me, as long as you dont go on Bourbon Street that is." I stated walking to the door unlocking it. "What's wrong with Bourbon Street?" Izogie asked walking up behind me. "Its where all the crime happens. More now than ever as it's a holiday, everybody getting drunk and some not knowin' how to hold their liquor, they get rowdy. We ready ready to go?" I asked opening the door hearing the jazz band a few houses down and seeing people crowding the streets. "Yeah let's go so we can find a good spot to see you dance." Izogie said closing the door and locking it behind her. I turned to look at them with a wide grin on my face, "Let the good times roll baby." I said as I began walking towards the huge crowd with my 'bodygaurds' right behind me.

•time skip•

As we're walking through the crowd of dancing people to find a good spot for sevika and izogie to see the floats and the performances I see my best friend who's dancing on the float with me and some other dancers. "Sookie sookie if it ain't Ms. Cookie, what's up baby how you doin'? You shakin' on the float this year?" Tootie asked as she hugged me placing some beads around my neck and looking over my shoulder at sevika and izogie who are giving each other weird looks. "Who's these two with you?" She asked raising a pierced eyebrow at me. "These my ol' ladies I was telling you about at practice, and yeah I'm shakin' on the float this year, they're here to watch." I said turning to introduce them to each other, "Sevika. Izogie. This is my best friend Tootie, I've known her since we was in primary school. she'll be dancin' on the float with me and some others. Tootie, these are my girlfriends Sevika and Izogie," I said standing in between the two buff women. "Old? We're not that old, do we look that old sevika?" Izogie questioned looking down at me as I laughed.It's just a sayin' we have down here in the dirty south, we say ol' lady or ol' man when we're talkin' about our lovers." Tootie explained to the confused women standing beside me as she laughed. "Hey, the parade's about to start you comin' ?" My best friend asked as she turned to walk to our float. "Yeah I'll catch up to you in a second hol' on." I said said turning to the silent duo standing behind me to find their eyes already on me. "Alright, it was nice meetin' y'all enjoy the parade," tootie said as she began walking away. "What does she mean by 'shaking' I thought you were dancing?" Sevika questioned, "Yeah and why did she call you baby? Is there something we dont know about going on?" Izogie joined in as I chuckled. "Like I said, it's a form of dancin' and no ain't nothing goin', on that's what everyone calls each other, it's a New Orleans thing. Are y'all okay though? This a good enough spot to see the floats and the performance? " I asked looking around at where we're standing. "Yeah, this is good enough for us." Sevika said grabbing me by my waist, pulling me to her and giving me a rough kiss. Izogie was next to do the same pulling me towards her, wrapping her arms around my waist and giving me a soft kiss. "Break a leg pretty girl," izogie said pulling away from the kiss, both of them leaving me a bit dazed as she slipped my bag off my shoulder handing me the sweater I stuffed in there. "Thank you baby, I love both of you and catch some beads for me I'll see you when it's over," I said hugging them both as I ran off to catch up with tootie linking arms with her once I did. "Ready to shake the house down?" She asked looking over at me with a smirk.

a/n: here's part oneee!!!!I haven't written in so long feel like i forgot how to😭. let me know what you think. thank you for reading<333333

taglist: @zestgodtj

#Spotify #sevika #arcane sevika #sevika smut #sevika x poc!reader #the woman king #izogie #Izogie x poc!reader #mardi gras #new orleans #wlw story #sevika x reader #izogie x reader

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fyeahcompetentwomen · 1 year

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Elimination Poll Group 3

This is the first of two elimination polls that I'll post today. The top three scorers in this group of 10 will get the three spots left in Group 3 of the bracket! This poll only goes one day, so vote quick!

Endorsement/blurbs under the readmore!

Fleur Delacour, Harry Potter: Part Veela, adept with charms and overall magic, plus a proven healer with Hermione Granger.

Iris, Pokémon: [good at] Pokémon battling

Guinan, Star Trek: Excels at bartending and knowing absolutely everything that is happening on the ship and being always a few steps ahead of others. Always ready to listen, even if she probably already knows what you're going to say.

Jocelyn "Joss" Carter, Person of Interest: An excellent detective and probably the only truly good cop ever. She cares about helping people and refuses to use her power as a cop to take advantage of others. Her ideas of good and bad are clear, but over the course of the show she learns where to be flexible in order to do the right thing for people who need her help.

Amy Rose, Sonic the Hedgehog: 12 YEAR OLD WITH MASSIVE HAMMER. UNGODLY STRENGTH (CANON. IN THE COMICS SHE LIFTED UP A HAMMER 14x HER SIZE). LED(LEAD?? I CANT REMEMBER IF LEAD IS LIKE READ WHERE IT CAN BE READ DIFFERENTLY) A WHOLE RESISTANCE TO SAVE THE WORLD AND IS STILL ORGANISING THE EFFORTS TO FIX THE WORLD AFTER EVERY SINGLE DISASTER!! is being The most emotionally Mature motherfucker in her Friend circle count Towards being competent? OH YEAH SHES ALSO GREAT AT FORTUNE TELLING! TO THE POINT WHERE THEY ALL COME TRUE. IIRC. I DONT KNOW IF SHES MAGIC OR IF THE CARDS ARE. THERES A GOOD VIDEO BY AL THE BOI ON AMY AND HER CARDS. yeah :) i love Her shes Silly :)) she's Also a very good Cook!

Donna Clark, Halt and Catch Fire: Engineering. Can fix pretty much anything. Successful business woman

Cassandra Pentaghast, Dragon Age: When she sees a problem she does something about it. She has no time for people who “sit in the fire and complain that it is hot.” She starts an entire organization to combat problems the government and church would prefer to ignore. She has a fine tuned sense of justice and is excellent at sword play.

Donna Noble, Doctor Who: even before she was the DoctorDonna, she was able to research enough to follow the adipose trail and find The Doctor. She is a temp, and doesn't care who knows because those skills are worth more than people think.

Miranda Priestly, The Devil Wears Prada: Editor in Chief of Runway, she runs a fashion empire and she's always in charge and more than on time!

Nemona, Pokémon: [good at] Pokémon battling

#bracket prep #elimination round #1 day poll #poll #group 3 #fuck yeah competent women #fyeahcompetentwomen

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fallish · 11 days

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i will absoluely take this baton, thank you for tagging @fairlylokai 🥰

1 ) do you make your bed? the truth is i tried for a while and i still do try occasionally but a majority of the time it ends up with me sleeping on top of a comforter because my brain cant put together the effort to pull it back and actually get in. im going to go with no (despite the state of my very made bed that i am currently sitting on at the time of this post)

2 ) what's your favourite number? two-way tie between 58 and 87. iykyk ;)

3 ) what is your job? im a software developer, its kinda a boring title but im getting good at it!

4 ) If you could go back to school would you? it really depends on the day you ask me this one. like generally? fuck no, it was hell on my adhd. on a particularly self destructive day? yeah and i might finish a college application before deciding to sleep on any major life decisions (and then i wont do it! 10pm rule that shit!)

5 ) can you parallel park? yes! i used to be the only one of my friends who could but i live on a street with only parallel parking and i think theyre getting better at it :D

6 ) a job you had that would surprise people? i used to be a camp counselor for one summer! everyone used to always tell me id be bad with kids because i didnt really like them, and i actually tried failing this interview but i guess they needed people, so i got the job. i got on swell with the kids! uh. not so much with the other adults tho. i accidentally made the ice tea spiked at the end of the summer and needless to say i was not invited back. i look back on it fondly :)

7 ) do you think aliens are real? of course. its unthinkable that humans are the only ones around in the whole universe. as they say, life finds a way

8 ) can you drive a manual car? nope. dated a guy who did once, and im ngl i was kinda into it, but i never learned myself.

9 ) what's your guilty pleasure? k pop photo cards 🙈 while I agree that guilt is for the weak, I do think I spend an unreasonable amount of money on those

10 ) tattoos? not yet, but ive got plans. my mom is super against them so while im at home, i cant. when i move out tho, i really want to get a set of wings in honor of ffvii (the first video game i finished)

11 ) favourite colour? i like yellow, like the mustardy kind but im partial to green and black

12 ) favourite type of music? i spend a lot of my attention on the punk/rock so like fall out boy and mayday parade and i listen to a lot of indie shit like glass animals and basement punk like the front bottoms and mobo, and recently im into kpop, particularly zerobaseone. also! i suspenct that no matter what, if i like the rhythm of the rap put in front of me, its highly likely ill enjoy it

13 ) do you like puzzles? i like puzzles so much i made it my job! one could absolutely say i like puzzles lol, me and my sister used to do them a lot and for her last birthday i got her a 10 pack.

14 ) any phobias? im not fond of men with raised voices, but on a lighter note, i wont go more than 5 feet into the ocean because i grew up in jersey on movies like jaws that made me wuite scared of shark attacks

15 ) favourite childhood sport? i uh didnt play sports 🫡 i liked watching hockey though and i still watch nhl hockey now! so that might count?

16 ) do you talk to yourself? oh yeah. all the time. i cant do tasks if i dont talk myself through them. it might not be out loud all the time (i respect public spaces and the quiet associated with them) but theres a constant running monologue i promise.

17 ) what movie(s) do you adore? cheesy answer but i LOVE inception its one of my all time top 5 movies i could watch it in any mood and it would amaze me.

18 ) coffee or tea? i like both, i prefer tea, but im not allowing myself to have either right now. im trying to get myself off of caffeine again because i recently started going back to work and drinking more coffee and what do you know? my migraines made a comeback

19 ) first thing you wanted to be growing up? i wanted to be a famous singer, and sometimes i still want to make music but i dont know, i guess it got away from me at some point. i still make little singing audios and send them to my friends and my mom always says i have a nice voice so the dream stays alive :)

thanks again for tagging! im going to tag @doomcannotbethisadorable @alittlebitofrainbyyourside @sherlockholmeson and anyone who wants to do participate!!

#b talk #thank you for the tag i love doing these!!!

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diesoonandsuffer · 2 years

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i just rewatched ‘taste of armageddon’ from tos and god what an episode. objectively its not “the best” but i think i was right to put it at the top of my rankings

basic plot summary if you forgot: kirk and the enterprise are ordered to approach a planet and establish diplomacy with them even though the planet warns them to stay away. when they land they learn that the planet has been fighting a war for 500 years but purely done through computers. the enterprise is declared a casualty so kirk and the landing party are taken hostage until the enterprise crew agree to come down and submit themselves to a disintegration machine, which the civilians of that planet do if they are declared casualties. kirk and the landing party end up destroying the computers and force the planets to either negotiate peace or fight a real war.

there are so many things i enjoy about this episode. i think for me, if you ask me to name you a quintessential TOS episode, this is it. theres some sort of strange premise that seems like a silly concept on the surface but leads itself to further philosophical thought. spock gets to do some weird vulcan telepathy. kirk busts out his sick karate moves. scotty blatantly denies the orders of a federation ambassador. kirk is a wiseass who comes up with some sort of solution somehow. the primary directive is almost certainly disobeyed but no one cares. its missing some things i would have liked, for example sulu is replaced by some guy and bones and uhura don’t get to do much, but for the most part this is everything i expect in a TOS episode wrapped in one.

feel free to stop reading here but i’m just gonna mention specific things that i like

1) spock saying there’s a certain logical approach to the computer war, and when the council leader says “i’m glad you approve” spock is like “i do NOT approve”

2) a female character who is not a love interest. this is an incredibly low bar but every time they played that violin music i would get scared

3) kirk saying “you will have a longer casualty list than you know what to do with if you don’t let us out of here” like he really said fuck the laws of this land i WILL slaughter you

4) the council leader using a voice disguiser to pretend to be kirk and scotty immediately being like “that’s not kirk” ashdjksahd

5) kirk watching spock do his vulcan telepathy. he’s a little too turned on by it

6) to follow that kirk’s little smile as he watches spock trick the guard to knock him out and take his gun. he’s like heehee hey girl look what spock’s gonna do i love this trick

7) spock getting the gun in the stupidest way possible. like hello

8) the ambassador being wrong. i love when federation officials look like dumbasses. yes i love search for spock why do you ask?

9) kirk’s little “come here” finger motion to the council member before throwing him headfirst into his own guards. incredible work king and he almost won the fight too with his karate chop action

10) spock telling the yeoman to “sit on her if you have to” to get the other woman not to kill herself

11) “what are you doing, mr. spock?” “practicing a peculiar variety of diplomacy, sir” *blows up disintegration machine*

12) the council leader saying kirk is a barbarian the scene before, and then the next when he’s like what kind of monster are you kirk goes “i’m a barbarian :)”

13) also that whole scene of the council leader being like war! destruction! death and violence! millions of lives slaughtered to save your 500 people! how could you let this happen! and kirk is like that is literally not my problem

14) kirk somehow taking down a room full of guards and getting TWO guns and saying “now we’re talkin :)” he’s like hell yeah TWO GUNS

15) spock walking in like oh. i guess you’re fine. ok then

16) the fucking line delivery of kirk saying “knowing we’re not going to kill......today” i need to clip that because i quote that shit all the fucking time. he’s like yeah i have an innate bloodlust and every day i have to fight my own instinct to bite and rip and shred but i won’t do it......today! god it’s so funny

17) last but not least in case you bitches forgot THIS EPISODE is where the incredible luck and miracles line comes from. it absolutely comes out of nowhere and they play it for laughs? for some reason? but this is where it comes from! LUCK AND MIRACLES BABEY!!!! YEAH!!!!!

#genuinely i dont know if anyone else likes this episode as much as i do #which i sort of get i feel like its a very standard average tos episode but thats sort of the appeal to me #like its quintessential star trek #like are episodes like a piece of the action or the trouble with tribbles funnier and probably more enjoyable? yeah #episodes like city on the edge of forever are more well written #episodes like amok time are gayer #episodes like shore leave are more insane #but if we're talking like a good enjoyable solid tos episode this is a good one #i would even call this like a good intro ep if you want someone to get into star trek #anyway. i watched this because i felt too tired to pay attention to tng like i think it deserves and now im wired.#lol #sam's thots #tos rewatch #tos

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scarsmood · 1 year

Note

You were cool for exactly five seconds until I found out you’re pro endo. You realize endos suicide bait, right? You realize DID systems have died due to their suicide baiting, physical, emotional and sexual abuse? I’ve known people who have died because of endos. Way too many people. Where’s your support for them, asswipe? You gonna turn your back on your own community for a bunch of attention whores? Man, fuck you.

Get fucked asshole, I have no idea what type of “endos” your talking about I’ve never had this problem. More often than not I see people like you bullying them into hiding. There’s literally nothing wrong with being endogenic. Their behavior is not because their endogenic either correlation does not equal causation.

Also between the two of us for the community I can say I’ve done way more than you. I’ve participated in DID research, talked and worked with previous trauma institute leads, i have been in the community for 10~ years now and none of it has ever had to end up dealing with “endos” if “endos” are the issues your facing with DID. I don’t understand why it’s at the top of your list when daily activities, professional misinformation and forced integration are way more pressing issues. How about the fact that it’s ethically okay for professionals (and encouraged) to hypnotize people with DID without their consent. When it’s shown that DID makes someone extremely prone to hypnosis in the first place.

But your telling me theres these vauge people that are endos that suicide bait. Thats cool. You know the suicide rate for DID is sitting comfy at something like 40-50% anyways? Let me tell you people bullying you, oppressing disabled people, and causing more trauma to people with DID are the real problem. Suicide baiting is terrible but its not because someone is endogenic. Do you realize how god damn stupid you sound? Thats like saying “don’t support bears we should kill all of them because my friend was mauled to death by one”

If your going to target a random ass group from your personal experience at least back it up with something substantial. But you cant. Because research shows and has always shown that plurality is not disordered. What is disordered is dissociation between parts. I have so many endogenic friends. I have tulpas myself, i have all kinds of shit im a polyfragmented system thats how it goes.

Why would I give a fuck about endos? Why would I be upset about someone who is plural without trauma? They are great people. Unfollow me. If you really wanna have a conversation get off anon im more than happy to have a long form discussion about this. But right now this keyboard warrior hiding behind anon is not impressing me. You are not doing anything at all related to what you were hoping.

Do not fuck with me on this. If you really care I’m more than happy to be kind and explain my side but it doesn’t seem you want that. I want you to know that I am not alone. Endogenic support is strong and thriving in spite of people like you. You have no excuse to repeat what was done to you onto them. None. Are we clear?

#asks #i can be nice #i swear

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yearningandpatheticaboutit · 2 years

Text

SPEAK FOR YOURSELF

CHAPTER 10: YOU SHOULD BE SCARED OF ME

warnings: suicide mention, drugs mention, sa menton

word count: 7111

previous chapter

***

San

when i wake up from my suffocating nap, yaera is tugging on my arm for us to get off the bus. i jump in my skin, looking out into the kind of neighbourhood i only pictured in movies.

my family was never really wealthy, but i know we always tried to do nice things. the houses and the clean streets and palm trees, everything around me just reeks of tax evasion.

"its not a long walk from here," yaera says, her voice sounding muffled. did she sleep in the bus too?

i cant hide my staring as we walk, feeling completely out of place. yaera's been hanging around my shitty apartment so often i forgot where she actually comes from.

it bothers me. i dont know why. sometimes i cant believe this partnership is real. there'd just be so much i'd overlook if all my needs were taken care of like hers are.

if its one thing im tired of, its surviving. just that. i dont remember the last time i had a good day that wasnt ruined by the impact of my fathers decisions.

we reach a white house that looks like something out of old hollywood. yaera stuns me by walking through the gate like nothing. i look around like a kid at a carnival, lost in the fantasy of how nice it must be to grow up around a functioning neighborhood.

yaera takes her shoes off in the front of her door, giving me some home nostalgia. i didnt realize a lot of people did that. i do the same thing, gazing around her sunlit foyer.

"no ones really home besides the maids so we can go straight to my room," she says, then turns around to look at me. "can i get you some juice? water?"

"do you have coke?" i ask.

"im not allowed to drink gas in this house. dont ask."

"juice is fine then."

she leads me to her room. her house has a lot of clocks. everything so simple and white. i pass by a wall on the way to her room, spotting a few baby pictures.

her room is even more bare than the rest of her house. everything i see...i never expected. nothing about yaera ever told me she has such a simple room.

it looks like something out of one of those modern home magazines. no posters on the walls, no pictures, no stuffed animals, nothing at all that showed her personality. not that i was an expert on that. but still.

"go ahead and make yourself comfy, ill be right back," she says and tosses her bag onto the bed. the weird sound it makes reminds me of the things she stole. she wants to sell them yet shes so careless.

i get up and walk around slowly. her room carpet is soft on my feet, better than the rough wooden floor at my apartment. because nothing in her room tells me anything, i go back to that wall.

im nervous because i dont like walking through the homes of others, but something intangible tells me to do it. theres a bunch of pictures of yaera as a preteen and a kid. she looks like a mess in all of them. her curly hair wild and her clothes hanging off her body like she played a rough game. and next to her is the girl identical to her, wearing the biggest smile.

it feels eerie to look at almost. knowing what happened to her.

the two of them are so tight knit, theyre inseparable in every photo. even though yaera is almost never smiling, she always has a hold on her sisters clothes or arm, while the girl looks so out of place next to her brooding twin.

i feel bad looking at it, feeling like im intruding. i hear footsteps coming up the stairs so i quickly run back and pretend to take my books out. yaera comes in a few seconds after, holding a tray of juice and a bowl of chips.

i shift awkwardly as she sets it down on the bed and sits down, roughly pulling at her school tie. her shirt pops open at the top, and i immediately divert my gaze when i catch a glimpse of her black bra.

dont. dont do this to me today. im begging my body to stay in check so she doesnt realize how starved of human interaction ive been before i met her.

"lets leave the studying for later," she boredly says and starts opening her bag. i frown at her, remembering what mrs evans told me.

in one of earlier periods, she basically begged me to tutor yaera, saying she was on the verge of failing and doing pretty much horribly in all her other subjects because she didnt try. if she didnt do well for the next few months, she wouldnt be able to go to any college.

"i dont think thats a good idea," i say, finally looking her in the eyes. her tie is around her head for some reason. "i was serious about tutoring you. it sounds like you really need help. we should get it done."

yaera rolls her eyes. "so im guessing evans spoke to you?"

"i think most people know you arent doing well in school."

"fuck you, san."

i almost smile because of the bland look she gives me.

"im just telling you the facts. what exactly are you going to do in italy?" i ask her. with the lengths shes going to, i know she has to have a plan.

"my grandmother from my mother's side, shes still alive. im going to stay with her. she owns a bakery and will take me in without saying anything."

"didnt you say you wanted to fall off the grid? away from your parents?"

yaera takes a handful of chips and throws it back into her mouth, exposing her chest yet again. i wince internally. i dont know where to look at this point.

"my mother got disowned by her mom a long time ago, when she left the country with my sister and i," she mutters, her tone quieting at the mention of her sister. "my nonna's family immigrated to italy from south africa years ago, so my mom was born in italy. my sister and i were born there too, so my grandmother was really upset when she left with us. they never talk, so i know im safe with her."

"how old were you when you left italy?"

"eleven," she answers, smiling fondly to herself. shes pretty when shes not plotting or wearing her insufferably sly smirk.

"we still go back and forth a lot. because of my parents business. i stay here for school and go back for vacations and holidays."

it must be nice, i think. im surprised shes handing out information so freely. i guess she does really trust me.

"maybe we can visit each other," she suddenly says, the smirk ive seen too many times hanging on her lips again. "when we're both wild and free in europe."

"you know england and italy arent down the street from each other, right?" i laugh slightly, wondering to myself why she would say that.

"so? you know what they say, in europe everything is walking distance."

i chuckle, i dont know why. shes not funny. its embarrassing how a week ago she was blackmailing me and now im eating chips in her room, listening to her life story.

wooyoung would be fuming if he could see me now.

he'd ask me why i was letting in a girl so notorious, so much of a fiend. someone so shady, who isnt at all afraid of danger. and even if she is, thats not gonna stop her at all.

i wont have an answer for him when he does question me. because i dont know why either. maybe im just letting myself have something for once. even if its not the smartest or sanest thing in the world.

yaera takes out the stuff she stole from her bag, snapping pictures of a shiney watch. "people will buy anything online, its crazy," she tells me slyly. "all i have to do is say free delivery and they come crawling like rats to a pizza slice."

so this is what shes been doing for money. "how much does it make you?" i question.

"a lot. i recommend it. even if there isnt a fixed amount, theres no way youre going home with coins."

she leans in to me suddenly, her bra poking open as a gold cross necklace hangs from her neck. i gulp hard. what is she doing?

"and i was thinking...if you cant get rid of all the rosies on time...maybe you can just give Miss A the money?" she continues on as if she doesnt realize how hot she is. or maybe she does, maybe shes doing it on purpose.

it takes me a few seconds to digest what she says.

"what?"

"we can dump it, or sell it ourselves for an even higher price," she says excitedly. "we pay off your amount and then just make double it. you know?"

i dont like the sound of it. im not good with finances, which is exactly why i do the rough stuff. its why im known for being the muscle. i still dont know why miss A gave me this shitty job, knowing i had no expertise. maybe she wants to get rid of me.

"lets play it safe for now," i say, stuttering slightly. im taking a lot of risks so this is going to have to wait. especially because i have enough to hide from miss A.

yaeras proximity is so close to me i cant ignore it anymore. her skirt is hiking up as she sits, her long knee highs distracting as fuck. im biting hard on my lip, the strain tugging in unmentionable places. i cant do this anymore.

"your top is a little...wide," i say suddenly.

"huh?" she looks down and realizes. i expect her to go as red as i feel, but all she does is grip her shirt closed and smile crookedly.

"my bad. i didnt mean to give you a show," she jokes. "wanna stand in the hall for a second? i'll put on something else."

i can never tell if shes being serious when she flirts with me. it feels like everything is a joke or a lie. no ones ever acted the way she does towards me before. i dont know how to deal with it.

i get up and leave, hardly making eye contact. my skin is prickly and hot. i cant be getting affected like this. im such a loser.

my imagination tries causing my downfall while her door is closed. the clocks in her house are ticking and im trying to focus on them instead of picturing her getting undressed. fuck, what is wrong with me.

i reach for my phone, hoping to get distracted. but when i reach for my pockets it isnt on me. i go back into yaera's room, without thinking at all and her back is faced toward me.

luckily it isnt her bare back. she has a pink tank top on. i lose my sense for a few seconds when she turns around, her top still dangerously low, and my phone right in her hand.

its open.

i fight my glare, i probably just left it open by mistake; but shes looking at me like she wants to kill me. her jaw is clenched, her dark eyes narrowed at me like i kicked a puppy.

"why do you have my phone?" i ask her cautiously.

"why do you have this picture on your phone?" she says back, cold as ice.

my mind goes blank. "what?"

she smiles but its nothing sweet. "yeosang emailed you. he wants to meet you for drugs. now tell me why he sent you this picture?"

oh. the picture of her with that older guy. the colour feels like its leaving my body. oh fuck.

"i-i can explain–"

"i noticed you got it a day after we met. were you trying to get leverage on me?"

im embarrassed. i dont know what to say. but my brain tells me to just be honest. theres no way they can look any worse.

"yeah, i was," i admit. she scoffs and rolls her eyes. "i wanted something on you the way you had something on me. but i dont plan on using that. ever."

"thats supposed to make me feel better?" she questions angrily.

"well, you still have that video of me dealing drugs. do you think that makes me feel better?"

she clamps her mouth shut and bites her lip in frustration, tossing my phone to the bed. i want to approach her but i feel like shes about to kick me out of her house.

she cant be mad. i know its fucked up but i was just getting even. i hope this doesnt ruin everything we tried establishing a day ago. that would be so exhausting.

she drops onto her bed, pushing her hair back as she glares onto the ground. "fuck that asshole, yeosang. that picture is useless anyway."

i frown and finally get the courage to move to sit next to her. "what do you mean?" i ask.

she scoffs again, a forced smile on her face. "because that isnt me. its my sister."

my blood pauses in my veins as i look at her. yaera sighs, the look on her face distant and pained. what?

"but yeosang–"

"is a fucking idiot," she finishes off coldly. "he leaked that picture of her days after she went missing. everyone thought she ran away and was rebelling so brands started dropping her. my parents threatened to sue and he swore to delete it. my parents made me step up and announce that i was the one in the picture so that yasmines name would stop getting slandered. so they called me a whore instead."

she chuckles darkly. "i guess it was easier to believe i was the whore and not her. they werent expecting her to be a bag of bones at the bottom of a canyon."

what the fuck. i bend my elbows on my knees and rub my face because i dont know what to say. yeosang is such a fucking asshole.

"i'll delete the pic," i say heavily. "i didnt know. yeosang said it was you."

"most people believe it is. to this day. but nah, thats my innocent sister in the arms of some guy."

"what the fuck is that angle?" i ask her in disbelief. "it doesnt look like she knows she was being watched."

"i dont think she did," yaera admits frighteningly calm. she reaches for something in her bag, and pulls out the camera she stole.

"i think my sister was being stalked. and i think that person is stalking me too."

"what?" i raise my voice. shes dead serious.

yaera holds the camera towards me, showing me a folder. when i look at the pictures inside, my face goes icy. hundreds of pictures of her at school, smoking, sitting around, completely unaware that a camera is on her. then as i scroll further down, i see the exact same picture yeosang sent me.

the original.

"what the fuck?" i whisper and shake my head. "we have to take this to your parents. or the police. what if this is the same person who killed your sister?"

yaera nearly drops the camera and i swear she looks like all the colour has drained from her face. she feels her head and shivers. "i-i think im going to be sick."

"i'll go get a cold rag. hold on."

i get up but she pulls me back by my shirt, shaking her head. "no please. just stay here," she almost begs.

we have to do something about this. this means the stalker is a student, or even worse, a teacher.

it cant be the guy in the picture, hes older and hes being watched too. it has to be a student, and it has to be someone part of the soccer team.

"did yeosang ever say where he got this picture?" i ask her.

she gulps and shakes her head. "no he said it was sent to him. and because he knows everyone, he was told to leak it. so he did. he thought it was from her or someone else saying that shes safe and alive. but...then..."

she takes a deep breath, and it sounds like theyre getting smaller. her chest is rising and falling harder than usual, a slight whistle in her breathing. i reach for her bag and rummage through it, finding her asthma pump.

"take this," i tell her and hand it to her. she takes two puffs, her breathing harsher than before. shes almost shaking.

"ill go with you," i tell her firmly. "to the police, or to your parents. we can show them this. you might be in danger."

"they wont do anything," she says defeatedly. "the police buried the case and i would just be bringing up old wounds to my parents. so much has happened...they wouldnt believe me."

"but we have evidence right here!" i groan, unable to believe what im hearing. "youre just going to accept this?"

"what do you want me to do?" she snaps her head at me. "do you want us to find this guy? then what?"

i clench my jaw thinking of it. hes probably some sick fuck getting off to pictures of yaera and a dead girl. how fucked up do you have to be to still hold onto this?

"we kill him."

"what?" she looks at me horrified. "what the fuck are you talking about?"

"okay fine, we dont kill him. but lets fuck him up, or get him in trouble. because this is messed up. i can find out who this belongs to. just give me your word and i will."

yaera nods with difficulty, looking like shes choking down sobs. this day has taken a completely different turn, we havent even gotten to studying yet.

my phone rings and buzzes again. i look at it. its the thirtieth call yeosang has given me. i pick up in annoyance and nearly growl into the phone. "what the fuck do you want?"

"fucking finally!" he screams, making me pull the phone away from my ear. "you asshole! ive been tryna reach you all day? you finally out of marino's ass? can i fucking talk to you?"

"what do you need?" i grit out because unfortunately i need this fucker and his money.

"i need you to give me like four bags before saturday. ill pay you today, okay? this shit is addictive im literally shaking and if you dont deliver im gonna fucking beat your ass, okay? im thirsty!" yeosang demands, his voice unhinged and feral.

"when do you need it?"

"did you not hear me? today asshole! drop it at the rockstar cafe near school. one of my girlfriends work there. give it to her."

"fine. ill send wooyoung to drop it."

"fucking thank you. god, was that so hard?–"

i hang up on him and turn my attention back on yaera. shes looking at me with a closed off glint in her soft brown eyes, her lips slightly pouted. i stare at them a little too long, against my will.

"how do you know yeosang?" she asks me suddenly. "or more, how did you start selling drugs to him?"

i cant for the life of me find out why she wants to know that. i did tell her i would let her know anything she wants, so i guess i should be fair.

"he knew one of yunho's guys," i say. "he used to sell him drugs when he went clubbing. long story short, the guy died and yunho asked me to start supplying yeosang instead. he was surprised when he found out we were at the same school."

"and he kept quiet?" she asks in genuine disbelief. "yeosang? the guy who tells everyone with whom and where he has sex? the guy who cant keep a secret for shit? that guy?"

"yunho warned me about him. i have a little leverage on him to make sure he doesnt squeal."

her eyes suddenly light up with that dark, mischevious flare she uses when she wants something. "what kind of leverage?"

"before i tell you, whats your relationship with yeosang?"

"he tried to fuck me," she says crudely, making my mouth nearly drop open. "and he knew my sister. he tried to fuck us both actually. and when i didnt let him he went around spreading rumors about me. he still does it to this day."

okay so she has it out for him. and rightfully so. everytime i hear about yeosang hes out disappointing his parents.

"his scandal is kinda fitting then," i chuckle humorlessly. "he had sex with this girl at one of yunhos clubs. he drugged her drink. yunho has it all on camera."

yaeras face morphs into disgust. "thats not fucking sex thats...he literally...oh my god."

"i know," i sigh. "hes a real piece of shit. yunho had his hands on that. and now it belongs to the gang. he knows if he speaks, his life is over."

"how the fuck did yunho record it?"

"he used to record everything in his club. hes was one sick fuck. there were cameras in every corner of that club. every single one. its how the police busted him. luckily for yeosang, his video already made it out of there beforehand."

yaera shakes her head and grips her hair. "this shit is fucking crazy."

thats my life. shes horrifed. i can feel it. but she wanted this. she wanted to be a part of it. luckily it wont be her forever. i dont know when it will end for me.

***

i tried my best to tutor yaera after the revelation of all the upsetting news. she struggled to pay attention, i could tell. her answers were all delayed and she kept zoning out on the diagrams.

at some point i accept we wont get any work done today. i look outside and see its getting late. yeosang is ringing my phone again, as well as wooyoung. i realize i have stops to make.

i close my textbook which happens to be open on the diagram of the heart. yaera blinks slowly, then sits up when she realizes we're done.

"oh. sorry," she mutters. "i wasnt really a good student today, huh?"

i shrug, its not a big deal right now. "we can try again tomorrow. you have a lot on your plate."

"thank you." she says in the smallest voice. its humble coming from her.

i open my bag and shove my books in and she helps me pack. eventually she hands me the camera.

"you take it," her voice is tired and flat. "do whatever you need to with it. i dont want in the house, im going to stare at the pictures all night and its gonna make me sick."

"ill take it away tonight," i tell her. "you remember the mongols? those guys you met when you followed me the first time?"

"yeah?"

"theyre my dads old gang. they do favours for me sometimes because they feel bad for ruining my life. i can get in touch with mao's niece. shes a hacker. i'll take the camera to her and see what she can do."

"thanks. i'd go with you but my parents are gonna be home anytime soon," she sighs. "be careful."

i swing my bag onto my shoulder and we walk out of her house. we schedule to study sometime on the weekend again, right before yeosang's party.

when we get outside the sky is almost pitch black, except for a faint line of blue over the roofs of the mansions. its going to be a nightmare to get transport this time around. i decide to call an uber.

"i wanted to ask you," yaera says as we wait in silence on the pavement. "theres this thing coming up with my family. like...an event for that photoshoot i did. and i need a date."

i raise an eyebrow. is she seriously asking me to go to a fancy event with her family? me? the poster boy for poverty?

"dont look at me like that," she punches my arm lightly, scowling. "im not into you or anything. i want you to meet the models im dealing to. theyre going to be there."

i narrow my eyes at her. "you want to deal at your parents party?"

"no, san. i wanna see you in a suit and drool over how hot you look."

my mouth hangs open at how completely serious she sounds while saying it. i nervously look away and wipe my face with a sigh, irritated by how easily she affects me. she bursts out laughing and my embarrassment worsens.

"you keep asking me dumb questions. obviously! and dont worry about the suit, ill get you one myself."

i dont meet her gaze even though i can feel her staring at me. "so you didnt mean what you said before that?"

she comes to stand right infront of me, that devious smirk on her lips once again. goddamn it. i fail to look away, not wanting to be intimdated except i am.

"about wanting to drool over you?" she asks lowly, her smirk dripping with smugness. "you want me to mean that, choi san?"

my body is abnormally fucking hot. i hear a horn beep a few feet away and see a black toyota waiting. thank god. i clear my throat awkwardly and tighten my hand on the strap of my backpack.

"i gotta go. i'll text you." i say and scurry away as fast as i can.

yaera waves slowly to me when i get into the car and look at her through the window. i need to keep myself in check, no matter how difficult she makes it.

on the way home i get texts from wooyoung complaining about yeosang and about me taking my sweet time at yaera's house. hes convinced we're having unprotected sex everytime hes not in the room.

my face warms again as an image appears and quickly vanishes from my mind. that wouldnt be the worst thing in the world, right?

no. what the fuck san. get it together. what the hell did you just think.

it was the grief and trauma from seeing yunho get sliced up. im convinced. no way would i be having these disorderly thoughts unprovoked.

the uber drops me off infront of a tattoo parlour, aespa. mao's niece is a tattoo artist here. ive only visited a few times, mostly doing errands.

its evening so the place is shut down, but i know shes here. i slam my hand onto the door and peer through the glass waiting for her to show up. it takes me a few aggressive policeman knocks before she eventually comes strutting out through the dark shop, scowling at me.

she unlocks the door and glares at me. "what the hell? do you pay to knock down my door like this?" she snaps.

"hey, ningning, right?" i say. "im san. you know me right?"

she squints her eyes at me and then clicks her fingers. "ah...that guys kid. i dunno his name. tekken?"

"yeah. can i come in?" i sigh.

she opens the door and flicks the lights on, allowing me to pass through. her hair is bright red and she has two full sleeves on both her arms. last time i visited she only had a few tattoos.

"im guessing youre not here for a tattoo appointment?" she says and goes to sit on a spinning chair. it accidently slides across the floor and she tumbles out of it. she gets up and smiles awkwardly.

i take off my bag and pull out the camera. "i need a favour. can you help me find out who this belongs to? its urgent."

"mmmmm did you steal it?"

"not important. i just need a name or an address."

she crosses her arms and nods. "that'll be easy. depending on how long this takes me, ill give you a price after."

i scowl. "please dont be unreasonable."

ningning gives me a nasty look. "hey, my uncle owes you favours, kid. not me, i didnt ruin your life. this is not a charity."

i sigh and nod, giving her the camera. i follow her to a backroom that ends up leading to a basement under her shop. she unlocks nearly four doors to get to her station, and i see massive monitors and a sick computer set up that i know costs more than my apartment.

she lets out a sigh and jumps into her chair, taking out the camera. im curious because i didnt even know cameras could be traced back. the police do it, right?

"so how do you do this?" i ask when she starts typing abnormally fast.

she chuckles, and my eyes widen when a bunch of alien code appears on the screens. "come on, even if i explained to you, do you really think your dumbass would get it?"

i scowl. damn it shes right.

"you couldve just said no," i mutter pathetically under my breath.

"serial numbers kid. serial numbers. theyre a godsent gift. also photos. does this camera have any photos?"

"yeah, a ton." my anger returns just thinking about the creep and his 'hobby'.

ningning pulls up the pictures from the camera and puts them onto the monitors. i bite my lip awkwardly when she turns and side eyes me.

"are you stalking someone?" she asks me dead seriously.

"no," i scoff. "im trying to find the stalker. and even if i was, you'd have no grounds to judge me with what you do."

"i may steal and sell peoples information but at least im not a weirdo," she rebuts and sticks out her tongue. seconds later she pulls out a piece of paper and starts writing shit down.

"theres an account attached to the camera. heres a name and address." she hands the paper to me. i frown looking at the name.

"Apple?" i scowl. this feels like a prank. and severely underwhelming. but at least ive got an address. im going to break this fuckers legs.

ningning smiles, sighing as if bored. "too easy. i was actually hoping this would be a challenge. that'll be 50."

i groan in the back of my throat, feeling like im giving out more money than im bringing in. yaera better pay me back for this. i dig into my wallet and give her my paper and it turns out its my last. broke.

ningning sends me a wink as i make my way out. "good luck, Lucky. or whatever they call you nowadays."

wooyoung picks me up a few minutes after, a new license plate on his van. hes honks obnoxiously for me to get in, nearly waking up the entire neighbourhood.

"never send me to plug that yeosang fucker ever again!" he immediately whines when i slide in passenger. "i cant stand that guy. how does he have that many girlfriends and i dont?"

"youre not a rich sexy creep i guess," i tell him and then sigh. "woo, we need to kill someone."

"what?!" wooyoung screams like the human loadspeaker he is. "who? the blackmailer?"

"no!" i snap and glare at him. i pull out the address and show him. "this is the address of the fucker thats been stalking her. including her dead twin sister."

wooyoungs jaw nearly drops. "woah. yeah thats fucked. when and where?"

i look out the window, thinking back to how she said she didnt want me to hurt anyone. i would probably piss her off and scare her. who knows what would happen. she doesnt want me to do things behind her back.

"let me tell her first. but tomorrow after school, we're paying this person a visit."

***

Yaera

it feels like everyday i wake up i feel more and more like trash. the nights feel long. the day feels too early. i know whats coming. its getting bad again.

ive been called depressed by my therapists and teachers. then it quickly became an excuse. an excuse to them i constantly use to be bad at school and everything else. all i know is everytime i think my happiness will last it doesnt.

when i dont feel my emotions, i dont remember them. they become foreign to me, like nothing. but recently ive been feeling a lot. san has made me feel a range of emotions.

sadness, fear, anger. excitement. fucking arousal. he makes me feel the way a cigarette does. which is crazy. i never thought i'd feel anything for anyone like that ever again. not since jongho.

i sit with silent admiration as he approaches me in the parking lot the next day. of course he has his resting bitch face on, but its one of the things i look forward to these days.

my hands are shaking inside my blazer pockets as i lean against the wall, my nicotine addiction not fulfilled for the day because i spent money on hairdye and forgot.

sans eyes shift to my now black hair and an awkward smile (i think its a smile?) sits on his face. "hey. did you get my texts?"

"my phone died," i say. i actually passed out after doing my hair last night, completely exhausted and terrified by the information that hit me. all that and i forgot to charge and bring my phone the next day.

"oh. i guess i have to say this in person then," san frowns. "i got an address and name for you. of the stalker."

my blood feels like cold sludge in my veins and i immediately feel more lightheaded. my stomach churns. "oh," i try to keep a straight face. "thank you."

he sighs and takes out a piece of paper. "before i show this to you. i want you to know wooyoung and i are planning to go to this address after school. you can come with us to confront the bastard. are you okay with that?"

my mouth is dry and i dont even know what to say. i didnt think he would actually find the creep. i dont even know if i can face him.

i nod with difficulty and san gives me the paper. my stomach immediately plunges like a fucking roller coaster.

no fucking way.

"i couldnt get his actual name. this is all thats available on his account." san sounds disappointed. his face drops further when i meet his eyes.

"are you okay? do you know this person?" he asks, hands hesitantly reaching out as if hes afraid im going to fall over.

i just cant believe it. after years and years i didnt ever think this could happen. but it makes sense, doesnt it? everythings starting to make sense.

"this is jongho's nickname," i utter lifelessly. "and this is his address."

"what?" san raises his voice. his eyes turn into planets. "the annoying prefect?? the one that hates you??"

i nod and almost start laughing. i almost start crying too. jongho is my stalker. he was my sisters stalker. i guess i shouldnt be surprised, he was literally in love with her. but me?

why me?

i cant fucking breathe.

it all gets worse. i reach for my asthma pump and it falls out of my blazer and plonks onto the cement. san picks it up and wipes it off, placing it in between my lips.

he pumps it for me, and i would almost consider this romantic if not for the fucked up circumstances we're always in.

"do you want me to hurt him?" san asks me seriously. "because i will."

i shake my head and scoff. "and face a lawsuit? you have nothing and jongho has everything."

san has a terrifying look on his face. "it doesnt have to be me. you know i know people that would make him pay for this."

i dont want him to pay. not yet. i just want him to be honest. i want this to fucking make sense.

"i knew he was fucked up but wow," i laugh to myself, making san more concerned. "imagine he did actually love me all this time? imagine he loved us both?"

"yaera." san sternly says. "process this and lets talk later. we have class. dont say anything to him or breathe near him. he could be dangerous. he couldve harmed..."

the sick feeling sweeps through me and i find it hard to digest. i gag and nearly throw up, but luckily nothing comes up. thinking of jongho, the asshole i cant stand but also one of my first loves throwing my sister off a canyon after strangling her is making me want to off myself harder than i thought.

and the image never leaves me.

even when we get to class, i find myself

lost in my own head thinking about it. i cant enjoy history for the life of me because im thinking of the past. im thinking of my parents that trusted him. yasmine trusted him too. so much. she thought he was fine with just being her friend.

no, im lying. she knew choi jongho wasnt fine with being just friends. i know she teased him with a relationship that would never happen. i know she kissed him a few times, maybe did something more. i know she led him on for years and he never really gave up because he thought they were perfect together. she could be cruel about it, the way she kept him on a leash.

now shes fucking dead.

"choi san!" someone screams, tearing me out of my thoughts as the classroom door roughly swings open. everyone stands up as our headmaster appears in the doorway, with...jongho behind him.

my breath hits a wall when i look at him, and hes glaring straight at san. the soccer coach is standing in the doorway as well.

san stands up awkwardly, confusion lined in his features. "yes sir?"

"it has come to our attention that items have gone missing from the boys lockerroom yesterday afternoon. choi jongho stated that you were the only one he saw hanging around that area at the time. can you confirm?" our headmaster asks, making the entire class fall into hushed whispers.

no fucking way. san is going red out of panic.

"i-i mean i was there. but i didnt steal anything. h-how or why would i?" san asks.

"you're a scholarship student," jongho spits at him like hes filth. "its not farfetched for you people to get carried away at a school like this. youre already here for free."

"excuss me?" mr grüne, my history teacher interrupts with a glare. "choi san is a good student he would never do such a thing. you can ask anyone of his teachers."

jongho lets out a spiteful laugh. "an expensive camera and watch have gone missing, i dont care about his reputation i care about my team. and choi san is the only person i saw at the lockerrooms yesterday!"

"i didnt steal anything," san defends, clenching his jaw as he grips his desk.

"then surely you will not mind us searching your locker?" the soccer coach says. san's face drops.

i hold my breath. i hold it because i know san has the camera hidden in his locker. we were supposed to confront jongho after school.

"i-"

"you cant search his locker," i say, scoffing and bringing the attention on me. "thats an invasion of privacy."

"its school property," headmaster corrects me. san is looking at me like hes internally begging me to stop. but i wont because i need to save him from himself.

"if you think he stole your shit, call the police," i say. jongho clenches his jaw at me.

thats right. you wont call the police because once they find your camera youre fucked.

"this doesnt concern you, ms marino," headmaster tells me sternly. "choi san im going to need you to come with us to give your locker combination please."

oh fuck. oh no oh fuck.

san slowly leaves the classroom and i can see jongho smirking evilly to himself. no way i cant let san go down like this. they'll destroy him. he doesnt know how to verbally defend himself.

"sir i need to be excused," i say and immediately bolt after them. i pull jongho to the side, making him glare and rip his arm from me. i grab him again, digging my nails into his skin.

"what the fuck are you doing? let go." he hisses at me.

"call the search off," i grit through my teeth. "call the fucking search off right now."

jongho chuckles. "and why would i do that?"

"because if you dont i'll take your camera to the police and let them know youve been stalking me and my dead sister," i say. his face crumbles.

in seconds jongho's smug grin shatters into utter disbelief. hes taking too long. san is going to get caught.

"go fucking call it off!" i snap. "tell headmaster your parents found it, say something or else im letting everyone know what a fucked up creep you really are."

jongho runs and nearly trips over his feet as he chases after our headmaster. my skin is pricky because im scared he wont get there in time. im scared san will go down for this. for MY doings.

i let out a sigh of relief when all four of them come walking back and san isnt in handcuffs. but jongho is giving me a terrified look. good, he should be fucking scared.

"i want to apologize to everyone here for interrupting your lesson and also choi san for the inconvenience," our headmaster says. "it was simply a misunderstanding."

mr grüne looks like he already knew san was innocent and san shrugs it off like nothing. he looks at me wondering how i did it. i mouth to him that we'll talk later. jongho drops something on my desk before he leaves, a note.

meet me on the soccerfield after break. i'll explain everything.

A/N: AYEEE NINGNING CAMEO ANYONE? AESPA X ATEEZ CRUMBS?

next chapter

#ateez angst #ateez imagines #choi san angst #ateez fanfic #ateez fic #ateez scenarios #choi san #choi san fluff #san angst #gang au #ateez mystery #ateez thriller #ateez ot8 #ateez au

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unethicalexperiments · 1 year

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idk how to really start this but like. my mental state is just so exhausting like im so tired of it. theres no reason i should be this volatile theres no reason i should react to situations the way i do. just last night i had a weird (not even that bad) interaction with a stranger and it pissed me off so much i tried to kill myself. i wasn't sad or embarrassed i was just so furious over it, because it was a 10 second interaction and i couldn't explain myself to the other person, and i was just so fucking angry i was ready to physically hurt the other person over it well after i walked away. and then once i got home i was so upset that i got that unreasonably angry over a nothing interaction. and its not like i even got angry while i was still with the other person! it wasnt until after i walked away! there were only two thoughts circling in my mind for about 30-60 minutes after (idk im so bad at keeping track of time) that were just "why do i react to things like this" and "i just want it to stop hurting" bc thats the worst of it it just hurts so much. i swear im in physical pain after having breakdowns like that i feel hollow in my chest and obviously i dont have to say anything else about how much it emotionally hurts. i just want it to stop hurting. is that really too much to ask for? to not be in so much pain for just a little while? i guess i still havent come to terms with the fact that im disabled, because i still think of being disabled as someone who uses aids, even though i know invisible disabilities are a thing. i dont see other peoples invisible disabilities as being invalid, just really my own, because i still feel like im high enough functioning that i shouldnt consider myself disabled. i dont use mobility aids yet i dont take pain medication yet so therefore the literal brain damage i have isnt bad enough, im still fine. i kind of got off track but thats also part of it i guess. another thing that really gets me is the fact that i actually do have bpd, i was diagnosed by an actual doctor at 17 and its still a more than valid diagnosis. i feel like im in this constant cycle of "i have to get better because i cant keep living like this" and "i have to get worse so everyone else can see what theyve done to me". like last night i literally had to sit down and reread the dsm chapter on bpd to remind myself this is why youre like this. you do have this diagnosis its real and it is a problem. my 30 minute episodes of actively trying to kill myself to be followed by watching tv or something and laughing as if none of that happened. i still cant fathom not living like this, not having to go through this every fucking day. and then on the other hand i had a great interaction today at my job that made me feel really good about what i do and proving the work that i do is actually helping the community around me. and i felt on top of the world for like an hour, i felt great! and then another thing at work happened where i proved myself/my team to be right about something! which was also great! and i got another half hour of happiness. and then i get home and im reminded of how alone i am, how i really have no one to do or share anything with anymore. which is partially my fault and partially not! im not gonna act like im the most pleasant person to be around or that im easy to deal with, but fuck, man, i try. and it always feels like no one else is trying. i cut my own hair for the first time a few weeks ago; it came out great! and had no one to tell about it.

and now im just staring at a wall over all of it. none of the bad stuff happened none of the good stuff happened. im gonna get violently angry later and im gonna be nearly euphoric later, its just another day. and i want to change i want to change my lifestyle so bad but how can i do that without any help. i spent years of my life begging for other people to help me and got ignored, which resulted in my disability. i tried so hard to fix it on my own but i couldnt! im not a doctor! and now ill never be because i couldnt finish my pre-med classes because of my disability! i feel like im constantly screaming at the top of my lungs and waving red flags shouting please for the love of god someone help me every day and every day nothing changes. they say you cant help someone who doesnt want to be helped, but has anyone actually tried helping people before? youre telling me you cant problem solve? you cant find a different road to a solution, just because we cant take the easiest one? im sorry that its not easy for everyone else to help me, but how does anyone else think i feel?

but whatever. im fine now. i relived every emotion i went through while writing all that but im fine now. now that its all out there its all out there, out of my system. i dont care anymore. because it didnt matter. because it doesnt matter. none of it matters. it happened and its gonna happen again. ill go through these cycles again tomorrow and the next day and the next week and the next month and the next year and so on. it is what it is i guess. but does it really have to be.

#talking to myself #content warning for like. borderline personality disorder. i guess.#this is just a wall of text bc i wont go back to therapy no one feel obligated to open or read this

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randomquietkid · 2 years

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"Surfboards and Sketchbooks" pt2

(If you haven't read part one of surfboards and sketchbooks please read it before you can find it on my page. Sorry I don't have a masterlist with all my fics yet, I can't figure out how to change the name on the links and I don't have that many posted. This part accidentally kinda turned into an all about me so you get to learn a little about me. If you want me to change some of the things because it is too personal and isn't varied enough I can totally do that. I'm pretty sure I'll be doing another part and I know what it will basically be talking about but I don't know what will happen so who knows I might have a fourth part too. I do think this part was a little all over the place and I don't like it as much as the first part so sorry If it disappointed some of y'all cause I think I could have done better.If you enjoy don't be afraid to send in requests there is a pinned post on my page of all the characters I would write about)

Trigger warnings: none. Probably cursing

Enjoy <3

Y/n POV:

I walked into school with my music blasting in my ears. I was listening to Alec Benjamin. As I looked around I saw that pretty much everyone looked the same. Tan, blond or brown haired, and a Summer wardrobe. Me on the other hand pale, brown hair and graphic tees, flannel and ripped jeans (I put what I would wear just because it was easier to write but I will change it if any of you would like. Kinda like a description of what I look like though ;) stood out from the crowd. My phone was laying on top of my sketchbook and book (right now I'm reading the Good Girl Complex but you can choose whatever you want) with my wire earbuds out the charger plug. I walked into the office to get my schedule from the front desk lady and saw the guy that I drew at the beach walk out. "JJ not even into first period and your already here" the Lady at the front desk said as she walked back from the printer with my schedule. "Yep. Sorry Mrs. B" he said "Y/n Y/l/n,here's your schedule dear. Have a great first day" she said as she handed me my schedule "thank you" I replied and walked out the office. 𝘑𝘑 was his name. As I made my way to first period from the office I saw JJ look at me walking away. Did he recognize me too, I really hope not.

First period was Social Study's. It was boring. I get the whole "don't want to repeat history" thing but if this generation did anything for history it would be either burn the world down or get so bad that people leave it, probably both. As I drowned out the teacher and started drawing in my sketchbook I heard shuffling next to me and saw 𝗝𝗝 sit in the desk next to me. Fuck. "Well I didn't want to jump right into work so I want everyone to fill out this get to know me worksheet" the teacher explained and many annoyed groans and complaints were verbalized but I just rolled my eyes. What are we 10, my teachers have been giving us that same worksheet since 1st grade. JJ passed me the sheet with a smile and leaned over to whisper " Have you also been doing this sheet on the first day of school for forever" he questioned with a small laugh "yep. Pretty sure they don't even read them just throw them away, basically gives them a free day" I said telling him my theory. He laughed "makes sense. I would" I nodded in agreement. " this may seem weird but, were you the one to sketch me at the beach two weeks ago" JJ asked. Shit he knows. " umm yeah. I'm sorry about my friends" I said apologizing for whatever they did. " don't worry about it, you have real talent. It was amazing"." why thank you" I smiled back at him as I felt my face heat up. Our conversation ended with both of us smiling as I looked at the sheet and saw the same questions as last year. 'What is your favorite food' *favorite food* 'what is your favorite music to listen to' *favorite music* (character playlists. Very hard to choose. Theres sooo many good artists) 'what do you like to do in your free time' *what you like to do* (for character purpose y/n will like drawing/painting and reading) 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑜𝑟 𝑝𝑎𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑑𝑟𝑎𝑤𝑖𝑛𝑔. 'Your favorite show' *your favorite show* 𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑚𝑔𝑒𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠 𝑜𝑟 𝑡𝑒𝑒𝑛 𝑤𝑜𝑙𝑓, 𝑑𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑙𝑦 𝑐𝑙𝑎𝑠𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑠ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑘 𝑠ℎ𝑜𝑤 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑓𝑢𝑙𝑙 ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑠𝑒/ 𝑓𝑢𝑙𝑙𝑒𝑟 ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑠𝑒, 𝑓𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑑𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑔 𝑠ℎ𝑒𝑙𝑑𝑜𝑛 (I have an unhealthy obsession with sharks thanks to my sister making me watch jaws at the age of six and then i had a really weird dream that got over my fear of sharks) 'favorite movie' 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑣𝑒𝑙 𝑚𝑐𝑢 𝑚𝑜𝑣𝑖𝑒, 𝑗𝑎𝑤𝑠, 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑚𝑒𝑔, 𝑢𝑛𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑡𝑒𝑑, 𝑎𝑙𝑙 ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑟𝑦 𝑝𝑜𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑚𝑜𝑣𝑖𝑒𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑓𝑎𝑛𝑡𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑐 𝑏𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑠, 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑚𝑎𝑧𝑒 𝑟𝑢𝑛𝑛𝑒𝑟 'favorite summer memory' 𝑤𝑒𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑎 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑐𝑒𝑟𝑡 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑚𝑦 𝑓𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑑𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑤𝑒𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑎 𝑙𝑜𝑡 𝑜𝑓 𝑏𝑜𝑜𝑘 𝑠𝑡𝑜𝑟𝑒𝑠 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑚𝑜𝑠𝑡𝑙𝑦 𝑚𝑜𝑣𝑒𝑑 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑝𝑎𝑐𝑘𝑒𝑑 𝑏𝑜𝑥𝑒𝑠 *what you did* (I did go to a concert and a lot of book stores but summer isn't over yet where I'm from) 'favorite color' 𝑏𝑙𝑎𝑐𝑘 𝑜𝑟 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑠ℎ𝑎𝑑𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑔𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑛 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 * your favorite color* (black or greens) 'do you have any pets' 𝑛𝑜 *your pets if you have any* (I kinda forgot what else were on those sheets so that's all and I have two dogs) 'dinggggg' finally class was over. "As you get ready to leave put your papers on my dest, I can't wait to read them" our teacher said. Me and JJ gave each other a look and both laughed a little as I bet he thought about what I said earlier. I got up and put the paper on the teachers desk and left the classroom. As I put my earbuds back in and pulled out my schedule to see where I was supposed to be next I felt a someone tap my shoulder. I turned around and saw JJ behind me playing with his rings and his friends by the staircase doing a horrible job at trying not to watch whatever was about to happen. "Hi" "hi" "umm so I was wondering if you want to sit with me and my friends at lunch" he asked "yeah I would love to" "awesome" I laughed a little and he smiled "what's your next class so I know where to pick you up from" he asked "wow such a gentleman, umm I have *blah blah blah*" he smiled and said "really, me too. Well actually all of my friends and me do" "that's great. Do you mind walking me I have no idea where I'm going" I asked as I put

My schedule in my back pocket. "Yep no problem" he said leading me to his friends. "Y/n this is John B, Pope and Kiara" JJ said as he introduced his friends "hi" I said and they all waved. "Y/n has the same class as us next and she doesn't know where to go so she's walking with us" he explained to his friends and the nodded and started leading the way. I got a little distracted when my earbuds got tangled in the swirl of my sketchbook as I tried to untangle them I heard John B ask JJ "sooo definitely don't have a crush on her" not convinced. I heard him wince because JJ elbowed him in the ribs "shup up. And I don't know but shut the fuck up I don't want her to hear you" JJ said. I laughed a little at his antics. When we got into *blah blah blah* classroom JJ and his friends sat towards the back, as the sat down I almost sat in a seat towards the side of the classroom with the door but JJ patted the seat next to me implying me to sit there. I gave him a 'are you sure' look and he nodded. "You sure" I asked again once I sat down. "Positive" he replied smiling.

As the teacher went on about some of the class rules and units and shit I started drawing a little alien dude in the corner of my sketchbook as I felt a piece of paper hit my hand. I looked over and saw a crumbled up piece of paper on my desk and I saw a smirking JJ next to me. I opened it to read it and it said "go on a date with me Saturday" with two boxes below one with yes one with no. I could feel my cheeks heat up as I read that. I checked the yes box and gave it back to JJ. I looked over at him to see his reaction, he had smiled really big. That made me smile. So we were just some idiots smiling in the back of the classroom as the teacher explained rules. But I didn't care, even though i don't know the kid I'm freaking out about our 𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗲 Saturday.

#jj x reader #JJ #obx jj x reader #obx netflix #obx fic #maybank #jj fluff #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank #made by myself #part 2 #Surfboards and sketchbooks #Surfboards and sketchbooks pt2

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