#i need to get my ideas out now tho

[cerisereids]

thinking about the time henry wanted to be spencer for halloween. he was clearly so excited, now imagine how excited he’d be with his own baby :,) i hc spencer as a girl dad always, so i think he’d love playing detective with his little baby girl 🥹🥹

#going to write this soon #i have such a busy week at work this week #but then i have next week off #i need to get my ideas out now tho #or else i’ll forget #writing coming next week 🫡 #criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid fic #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid blurb #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x reader #belle’s blurbs s.r.

[luck-of-the-drawings]

OH ARTHUR BENNETT.. such a gorgeous and intriguing character. terribly burdened by a GRUESOME set of crimes, his light suffocated by a HEAVY century of GUILT. so tragic, so dark and broody, and yet PAINFULLY awkward in any social setting ever

#jrwi fanart #cw blood #jrwi show #jrwi suckening #arthur bennett #OUHH THIS ONE WAS SITTING IN MY WIPS FOR SO LOOOONGwhen i took it out there was mould on it :sob: #BUT i think i was able to fix it up okay #i keep seeing SO MANY MISTAKES RRAAAHHH BUT YOU DONT SEE THEM RIGHT?? THATS ONLY ME. RIGHT?? EXACTLY. #THE KEY IS TO SAY. AND REPEAT AFTER ME. 'FUUUCK IT WE BALL #so anyway. arthur bennett huh? grizzly says that arthur is reaal fuckin difficult to play. and i SUPER get that. i mean LOOK AT HIM.. #grizz often needs a minute to think abt what hes gonna say in a way that matches w that Stoic Personality. which is FAIR but also that #ends up making way for awkward confrontations like: the lady in the parky lot. he took too long to answer and scared her away.& I LOVE THAT #arthur is tragic and sad and cool and stoic but hes ALSO awkward and silly and kinda dumb and short sighted. HE HAS COMPLEXITIES #I LOVE WHEN TTRPG CHARACTERS HAVE A GOOD SET OF SHORTCOMINGS. ESPECIALLY WHEN U FIND THEM ONLY AS U PLAY THEM. #I COULd go on and on saying the same things w different words abt arthurs intriguing and entertaining character but i shall spare u. for no #ILL ALSO MENTION HOW MUCH I LOVE HIS FLAVOR THO.. I LOVE TALL HOT BOY WHOS ONE W THE DARKNESS.. I REMEMBER WHEN HE FIRST MENTIONED THE #BADLUCK. N I WAS LIKE OOOHH THATS WHY HIS DESIGN IS SO COOL N CHAOTIC N ASYMMETRICAL. HES UNLUCKY!!! i love love love his design so much... #GRaaauruguguraguhhghghgh what else what else is there for me to spew on abt...i think im reachin a limit here..OH MAGNUS. i hope that #we get to know more abt how magnus and arthur met.. like How they became besties... ouuhh... I ALSO WANNA KNOW MORE ABT MARY DAVIS. LIKEHOW #he also apparently spent alotta time in a zone dominated by edward twilight? all he remembers is constant partying? I WANNA KNOW MORE.. #i think i got room 4 one more ramble SO. THE ART PIECE.as i said its gone a lil stale BUT. im still very proud o the bits where hes allScar #I WANNA SEE HIM GET SCARYMORE. I like the idea of shadows solidifying to make him strange and eerie.like TEETH n CLAWS n SPINES n YESS #also the SILVER EYES.no1 does silver eyes like the show Claymore. they make em look so striking and eerie...i also like to think that #human arthur had deep beautiful brown eyes.just in my beaitufl heart.i mean look at him..i wanna cook him n eat him.ANYWAY #i think thats all my ramblin for this piece. now i gotta go cancel a single day i had ata hotel bc my work schedule change last minute FUCK #feel free to ramble in my tags aswell tho i read all of them and i chew on thenm and i love them so sos os mcuh

[veinsfullofstars]

🪞 Fallen angel... who do you see staring back from the Mirror? 🪞

(ID: Kirby series fanart of Galacta Knight and my personal interpretation of his Mirror World counterpart. GK hovers above facing slightly to our left, his feathery wings spread wide, shaded in lilac and tipped with gilded wing talons, a swallow-like tail visible. He holds his shield forward in his left hand (our right) and his lance to the side in his right (our left), a single magenta eye leering at the viewer through the visor of his mask. A halo of heart spears floats and shines angelically behind his horns. Below him, M!GK hovers in the same pose but flipped horizontally and without the halo. Visually, M!GK has mostly the same features as GK, with his color palette being darker and less saturated (dusty purple body, dark gray armor, gray mask, maroon lance, rose-gold horns and weapons accents). His eyes are not visible in the shadow of his mask, but there are signs of erosion running down the metal surface in rusty orange lines, almost like tear tracks. Instead of feathery wings, M!GK has wings composed of jagged shards of pink crystal, glittering and lit from within by a luminous glow. A few pale feathers can still be seen peeking out from his back. END ID.)

Hey, so... what if... I went a little insane for a minute? What if I just... concepted a character... for the sequel... to an AU... I've told no one about... and haven't even finished writing yet? What if I then... pulled the salt shaker labeled "ANGST" out of the pantry and just... unscrewed the cap all over this poor lad? Oh, and Galacta Knight's here, too, I guess.

Sketch started 02/21/24, render started 03/01/24, finished 03/06/24.

#veins art #veins ocs #veins fanart #fanart #kirby series #kirby #galacta knight #original character #oc #kirby oc #my ocs #mirror galacta knight #<- (note that I don't claim to own the concept of M!GK itself - just this specific interpretation of him) #AU #kintsugi au #<- ('cause apparently I needed to lose my mind in yet ANOTHER au rather than finish any of the others) #I'm having Ideas(TM) #me concepting: “hmm...how could I possibly hurt him more?” #“oh easy. by taking away his wings and putting his own crystal prison in their place! :D” #me realizing I have to actually draw said wings: *suffering* #I mean I guess they came out alright in the end but *frustrated artist noises* #regular GK still gets to be the Bastard of All Time tho - at least in this version #he also can be a li'l extra and have some gold wing claws as a treat :3 #how many eons do you think it takes to cry through your own mask? #*pounds fists on table* Rose! Gold! Horns! ROSE! GOLD! HORNS! #buh okay I need to stop looking at this thing for a minute - I'm gonna conk out now see ya'll tomorrow honk shoo mimimi #swallow tailed galacta knight #<- (inspired by @starflungwaddledee) #angst tw #veinsfullofstars

[crybaby-bkg]

Arranged marriage AU with Barbarian Bakugou who is so daunting to be around at first. He’s all gruff curses and broad shoulders and scarred cheeks and neck and jaw. He scowls constantly, stares at you while your parents auction you off like some show pig, but doesn’t say much to you besides a grunt of his name. You’re terrified, thinking that he’ll be cruel to you, that you’re being set up for a life full of unhappiness and terror and regret.

But he’s the exact opposite. Bakugou is gentle in ways a man of his size typically wouldn’t be, but he shrinks himself for you. Not in a way that diminishes his status as the newly appointed king, but to respect you, show you that you’re beside him instead of behind him.

He picks you berries on his hunts because he knows the smell of a fresh kill brings nausea to your stomach. You find him along with the other maidens and helpers around his village, sitting beside them, big fingers holding tiny little flowers that he weaves into a crown for you. When he sets it on your head, he purses his lips, mutters something under his breath in his language that you’re still not too familiar with, but sure it means something along the lines of pretty and soft.

And when he finds you bathing in the river only few have access to, he’s sweet the whole time. Doesn’t make a spectacle of you being naked, and is relieved when you don’t instantly cower when he wades his way over to you. You try not to stare at the clawed scars that decorate his pec and jaw when he stands above you, and it helps when he suddenly dumps water all over your head. He shushes you when you splutter, continues on with cupping his hands and letting the water run off of your hair and down your shoulders, scrubbing at your skin until your flesh squeaks. He doesn’t expect you to do the same for him, but he hums in satisfaction when you push him down a little lower so you can wash the crown of his head.

#I don’t think I’ve ever actually written a full blown barbarian bkg fic which should be a crime #bc there are so many good ideas for it #but I’ve been struggling with writing creatively so I will put this idea as a full fic on the back burner for now lol #in the drafts for another 8 months! ☝🏻 #sorry I’m lying I’m about to write it rn aidsjdhdjf #anyway interaction has been so low and that doesn’t help with the low energy level when it comes to writing #I do it for myself but it’s a little sad when it feels like I’m talking to myself since I do that enough already lmfao #it’s the beginning of the semester tho so I GET IT bc I’m struggling to read too #this semester isn’t even all that hard but I’m so mentally checked out from school that everything is so much more complicated than need be #I just need a really long break to find myself #feels like I’ve been on go for a few months straight now #okay bye my stomach started cramping really bad which is a single to take my ass to bed lmfao #—new treat in the streets! 🍫 #bakugou treats! 🍬

[starflungwaddledee]

been working on answering a prompt i received in an ask the other day, and so i'm back thinking about... the Thing... 💖🎀 and thought maybe prompt doodles might help me work through this a little?

so uhhh.... if by any wild chance anyone has any ship suggestions for starstruck...??? feel free to send them through!

#this is *only* for starstruck and is not general requests! i'm just trying to figure out how i feel about this 😳 #obviously no guarantees that i will be confident enough to draw any of these or that i'll enjoy them all but i just... am considering it? #idk idk idk is this stupid.... #hope i won't regret this or won't get genuinely weirdass things. #just to be transparent this is sfw exclusively tho implied flirting is a-okay. please don't be weird....? i'm trusting folks to be nice!! #i would also happily take little prompts if you have thoughts about how it would work or whichever! like if you're a character Understander #if you have an idea how it would Work or what it might Be Like that would also help me to get a concept on how i feel about it!! #also i would.. consider ocs (only from their creator) if you... wanna??? character+artist *must* be an adult. starstruck is in her early 30 #also with ocs preferably from folks who i've at least interacted with before and like.. not just bc u want art ;;; #like... do u geniunely think they could have a cute dynamic? i'm just wondering if she could be Cute w someone. AUUghhGHHHH #again no promises and also for now i need this all done on the assumption it's just for fun!! just funsies. i'm just... thinking i guess! #want to try and figure out what it might be like if she WAS involved in a little ship/romo space...? as a treat? auughghhggghGHGLLG #also fair warning i may just get super embarrassed/nervous about this all and delete!! but i'm.. yknow. trying! #also i figure you can kind of tell my faves and who i hardly know much about. might not have lots of feelings about most side chars! #delete later #probably #wheeeeeEEEEeeahahahah okay;;; just post it. just post it starflung. just do it. hit the button hit the button hit the b

[waitineedaname]

thought I should collect my vague fma/mp100 thoughts here to make it easier to have them all in one place !

basic plot/character stuff

ed and al are both talented young psychics who got their powers when they were pretty young. ed got his powers around the time their dad (a CRAZY powerful psychic) left, and al got his shortly after their mom died :(

they thought they could use their powers to bring their mom back as a spirit, but it went. very bad. instead, an evil spirit took advantage of them and started fucking Eating Their Life Forces. al freaked out and astral projected out of panic, but his entire body was consumed so now he's. stuck like that. ed managed to exorcise the spirit, but not until after his arm and leg are devoured too

their motivation is to get rid of evil spirits that take advantage of people and hurt them like this, which is what takes them to roy mustang's door

roy mustang is a fake psychic pretending to have pyrokinesis (he just has a flamethrower behind his desk) because I think that's funny. he's running an exorcism business like spirits and such, except he has a larger crew -- mostly his friends he can call up to do odd jobs for him, like fixing the leaky pipes that make noises that make people think their house is haunted or whatever. he's also the only exorcism business that's willing to hire a teenager, so that's how the elrics end up working for him

in addition to mustang's crew of non-psychics, he also has hughes, who is tragically a ghost. there is definitely some tragic back story here that I'm still working on hashing out, but they've kind of come to terms about it now. he still haunts his family, who know he's there, and he agrees to help out mustang with Actual Spirit Issues when the elrics are unavailable

the elrics' quest to deal with manipulative evil spirits leads them to encounter the sins, who are all very powerful evil spirits. one of the first ones they deal with is greed, who they mostly exorcise, but he manages to just barely survive, dimple style. he's looking for ways to bring himself back up to full power

enter: ling yao, recently awakened psychic who is also looking for ways to become more powerful. he keeps over-exerting his psychic powers and exhausting himself, which is how the elrics come across him mostly unconscious. he's very excited to meet another esper, but he makes the mistake of asking why al doesn't possess ed, since he knows that can enhance someone's psychic powers. the elrics are both Very Sensitive about that kind of topic and tell him to fuck Right Off

bad idea, because then he goes and finds a spirit of his own. both he and greed approach their mutually beneficial consensual possession situation for self-serving reasons. both of them look at each other and think "yeah I can definitely manipulate this guy into making me more powerful" [fast forward a couple months to when they've become Extremely attached to each other] oopsies

lan fan is a telepath. ling did not know this, so he tried to act soooo normal about being possessed around her. that didn't work for long, jackass! she got so fucking angry with him when she heard a literal devil on his shoulder, and even though ling stopped her from destroying greed, that evil spirit is on THIN ICE.

scar's family was killed in a psychic terrorist incident (think kimblee if he was part of claw). he's one of those really late bloomer espers -- it wasn't until this traumatic event that his psychic powers awoke, and he hates them because of the link to the event. now he's on his vengeance based quest, going after psychics that abuse their powers

things I'm still working out the details for

mustang was involved in some high profile fuck-up. kind of like separation arc reigen except uhhh people Died. hughes was likely one of those people. no one has enough proof to outright prove he did it, but he is definitely linked to the event, especially because he was a pretty public psychic figure at the time. in reality, it was the fault of the sins, but it's harder to find evidence when it was evil spirits doing it

olivier + the rest of briggs are an anti-psychic terrorism government agency (kinda like joseph) and initially scar is one of their targets, but they end up recruiting him bc they have a common goal

eventually scar starts working at spirits and such (olivier's assignment so he can keep an eye on mustang) but he fucking hates it. oh my god I cannot emphasize how much he hates it. imagine reigen serizawa and mob at spirits and such except none of them can stand each other. that's mustang, scar, and ed having to work together.

mei is also a psychic! she kind of latches onto both scar and alphonse (separately) because she needs some help killing someone. they have very different reactions to this.

the someone she's trying to kill is father, a super powerful psychic who's been orchestrating much of the psychic terrorism, as well as directing the sins. he's like if toichiro had a specialty for spirit wrangling like matsuo

miscellaneous au details

ed and al's auras (and al's spirit form) are mostly gold, ed's leaning more coppery and al's more of a green-gold. ed's kind of has the look of fire crackling around him. ling's aura is a blend of red and purple and has a kind of watercolor/bruise look. it's more vibrant and has more purple when greed is possessing him. mei's is mostly pink with some red.

mob psycho spirits range from completely abstract to mostly humanoid and frequently have multiple forms in between. hughes looks mostly humanoid most of the time, but can go simplified and silly when gushing about his family. al has a more powerful form that looks like the full suit of armor but he doesn't like using it very often, so most of the time he's a long blob that's just kind of armor shaped (like when the armor is simplified for silly moments). greed at full power looked like the ultimate shield, after being weakened he looks more like a dimple-like blob that resembles the face in ling's mindscape. when possessing ling and both of them are using their powers, ling gets lines on his face like on the ultimate shield (like dimple's cheek spots!)

other spirits: pride looks how you'd expect. horrible shadow spirit. envy bodysnatches a lot. wrath has been possessing a politician for Literal Decades. it's no good. I'm not sure about the other sins

people's feelings on possession range from the elrics (Fuck No), to hughes and mustang (if necessary to get a job done), to greedling (they like it like this actually)

the rockbells aren't psychics but they live kinda adjacent to the psychic world bc theyre family friends with the elrics + hohenheim, so they know more than most about psychic powers

#this ended up SO LONG. WHOOPSIE. #fma #fma mob psycho au #this is now my masterpost for this au #if more details get worked out then I'll edit it #but I thought it would be easier to have a post with all of it than having it scattered across dms and posts #speaking of dms tho. for me creating aus is a very collaborative process #so I would LOVE to hear input and ideas and stuff to mold this into the best it can be #especially since I have my favoritism and my blindspots #which means I've thought a lot about the elrics and greedling and scar #but less about like. the mustang gang #I've tried multiple times to write stuff for this and it's never quite come out like I want #bc I hold my aus to too high of a standard I think #I'm like ''my writing must be COHESIVE and tell a STORY that MAKES SENSE'' #which then keeps me from writing things just for shits and giggles when it's for a big au like this #alas. I need to work on that.

[nomiyakazehaya]

random au idea where megatron is a walking wasteland (literally based on that same trope) because of his antimatter

what's the reasoning behind this au? solely an excuse to see a horrendously depressed, melancholic, and sad despairing megatron who's a victim of her own circumstances. that, and some musical brainworms but we don't talk about the brainworms i just love the idea of such a sweet and gentle megatron progressively growing so solemn and despondent, and actively having to avoid people and isolating herself or even going as far as self imprisonment so much as to not bring harm to others

#⋘ 『 ─ noms' chatter log; 』 ⋙ #megatron #also very loosely based off of furi #amazing game btw #inFURIatingly difficult but fun :) #where did the antimatter come from? #idk i didn't think that far #no particular continuity either despite the obvious idw antimatter inspiration #now that i think about it sg megs could actually fit here really well too tho... #i'm highkey just talking out of my ass after listening to furi ost and getting the brainworms from it #i just really needed to jot this down somewhere #i should do it more tbh but i'm abysmally shy with sharing my dumb ideas :( #i realize the more i write these the more i find out i REALLY have a thing for decadence/the beauty of corruption...

[phoenixcatch7]

Okay but like Peter Parker reincarnated as dick grayson angst

#peter parker #dick grayson #nightwing #spiderman #Me in my little head listening to music and suddenly it auto fills a gap that wasn't even there and now I can't stop thinking about it #batman #story prompt #fic prompt #Fic idea #The angst would be juiciest if he didn't keep his powers #So like he's always pushing his body further to try and gain back just an inch more of what he had #Because even as spiderman he was too slow or weak to save everyone and he never realised just how dependent he was on his spider sense #At first he's living the dream with alive loving parents and acrobatics and travelling the world in peace #He's crushed when they die. In a way spiderman could have so easily prevented with his webs. He had to watch AGAIN. He's furious #With his experience from his previous life he latches onto batman and creates Robin from that. He balances school and hero life once more. #He becomes night wing when Gotham grows too dark and stifling. He needs out. To be a solo hero again. He hates that he has to leave batman #But at least he's alive to be mad. #When he gets siblings wow new experience!! Batman parenting normal kids is Such a bad idea but he'd die for them! #Then everything cascades and batman goes from iron man/daredevil to punisher/black widow and Jason doesn't want to listen #Even tho he died too and it hurt and b had a bio kid and he's batman until he isn't and he misses aunt may and still he loves being alive #Because spiderman was killed #And nightwing is older than he will ever be

[ace-apple]

roier lore, fred not being dead, and quackity lore tomorrow... im just saying this feels like something connected

#mcyt #qsmp #my guess is the roier lore is gonna involve one of the two. #i know ppl are saying purgatory 2 but i think its a bit too. early before when that will probably happen? #for him to be setting it up already idk. cuz its gonna be in like the last 2 weeks of the month it feels weird for setup #for him to start NOW so long before. maybe thats just me tho idk. #im thinking either. getting dragged to where q is. #or getting dragged to where fred is. #but i dont actually have any idea lmao. #sorry im talking into the void but i needed to get this thought out there

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#just an observation bc im avoiding working on stuff but i draw a lot and post basically everything i draw thst gets finished #and its v funny to me how u can tell how out of focus i was based on the quality of the drawing #or like when i post something and its like ok some of that was good but u def gave up halfway thru one of those lol #inconsistency i funny like that. its also funny to me that now a days i get comments like COLORS!!! #which is funny bc i notoriously haaaaaate coloring. like i will sit around whining and complaining when im home with my parents bc i dont #wanna color. its just so easy to fuck things up when u draw traditionally and it takes a million years so its a big ask lol #but i guess i dont hate is so much right now bc i kinda just slap whatever colors i want together like fuck it we ball #and thats kinda fun. reckless i suppose #its agony when u wanna try to do shadows and lights tho. like finding references ugh #or wanting to draw big ideas but then its like oh god its gonna take so long and if i dont do it all in one sitting i might die #im a lil better abt thst now bc it would b impossible but in my head i still hate it #ugh. all i wanna do is draw. theres another universe where i went to art school. or just like took art classes. and i wanna say id b happier #but thats def a lie XD i like learning too much and i dont have the attention span to hardcore learn genetics outside an academic #environment. and i got way too excited abt exploring the genetic traits of my cyano species #like i can make genetics trees for traits and look for. fuck. i forgot the word. how tf did i forget the word. oh god. horizontal gene #transfer. jesus christ its like theres a hole in my brain. well. i guess i did get only like 4hrs sleep. ugh im rambling. #i need to finish getting ready for Monday so i dont have to tomorrow and ill have time to draw. prob wont stop me feeling nauseous abt #teaching tho. OH FUCK. i just remembered i have a new office space now to decorate. fuck i need to hang up pictures and stuff #what would b the funniest way to put narut0 on my deskspace? idk ill have to think abt it. oh god im not ready #my head is like a handbell. one of the big ones when u ring it and it hits soft and u can feel the vibrations. someones wrung my head lol #unrelated

[skunkg1rll]

im in love w him not only bc of who he is as a person nd how drawn i am to his personality, but also bc i feel like he's the only one who has ever wanted to see me. who i am, like deep down. he's the only one who i feel like i've ever connected with, in an easy nd genuine way. the only one who i feel has ever gotten me. he's the only one who's ever made me feel like we actually have a connection we're both in on, bc i havent had to pretend or put up a fake front for him bc he wanted the real image of me.

#unfortunately he has his own shit to deal w #so bc of one thing that was actually a mistake from me #he misjudged it nd saw it from his own perspective nd didnt understand mine #nd thus concluded that he saw me wrong nd didnt actually know who i am #nd then he had decided that so strongly he wasnt wven open to hear me out or try to understand what that situation was for me #that made me very sad nd hurt nd like #he doesnt actually like me as much as i like him #bc i would always always ask him nd hear him out before jumping to conclusions #i have asked him abt this but he is a wall nd doesnt wnna talk abt it #nd i cant force anyone so... yeh. it is what it is #i wish that we had the connection where he wanted to understandwhere i was coming from #instead of being like ughshe isnt the perfect image that i had constructed #so now im writing her off completely bc she doesntlive up to my expectations #but... my heart just loves him sm i can look past that #however... that is meaningless when i dont even know what he feels for me nd i cant get an answer out of him #maybe he doesnt wanna tell me bc he doesnt return my love nd he knows i'llbe hurt nd he'll risk losing me as a friend #i'd never stop talking to him tho.. that is the worst part #if imginna get over these feelings #i need to hear it straight from him. i need him to tell me thatno i am not in love with you #then i need to never talk to him again nd never lookat his social media #then it will hurt a lot but after a year or so i will only feel empty nd not hurt when i think of him #but i am tooweak to be the one to stop talking to him now #my entire day revolves around him nd i know its unhealthy but idk how to stop #since this obsession is unrequited i dont actually wanna feel it #but i have no idea how to stop #god this is driving me insane wtf is wrong w me??

[lady-grace-pens]

Hey writers

Has anyone else ever had this thing when they’ve been between projects for a while and haven’t been writing much, and they’re getting antsy for something new? And they have ideas they like, but they like. Literally just got them. Like a week ago. Or just yesterday.

And planning take a while. A lot of time and energy. You can’t really force it even though you try. So now you’re in this weird messed up grey area where you’re excited but absolutely terrified of starting something new. And you’re also being extra hard on yourself because you have to make it perfect, it has to click immediately, otherwise you feel useless simply resting and not being creative/productive. So you tend to obsess over planning to the point of anxiety, which only makes you stress out more and feeds this negative cycle. But you have passion for the ideas, you do, and you want to work on them. But you stress yourself out so easily because you’re so antsy and you haven’t had a project in a while.

Anyone else get that?

#kaitlyn talks for once #writeblr #writing #whoops didn’t intend for this to be this long #i can’t tell what to do #do I embrace the rest? embrace the slow nature of planning? #plannin usually takes a little while for me anyway. I’m that kinda person #how can I do that while taking care of the Antsy and The Pressure? #above all I just need to know that this won’t last forever like I’m scared it might #i mean. I’m glad this is a sign I’m a legit writer and creative person who cares about writing and the ideas she gets #I’m grateful for that. but it would be great to stop feeling useless and so stressed #ugh #writing is hard #In any case I should probably take a day to chill out. i think? maybe? idk #right now I should get dinner #haven’t eaten all day #bleh #friend of mine said I should focus on writing snippets for now #probably #i can’t with The Stress tho. maybe I just need to force myself. or should I calm down and like. take my time? both? idk #I haven’t been in this situation before #i don’t like it very much #does this make any sense to anyone? i Hope so

[cestacruz]

Mmm Jeanne

#servants cant learn new stuff (i'll talk about jalter in a second) therefore #jeanne shouldnt know how to read or write #we actually Dont get a confirmation that she can do those things in summer 3. because the book that jalter thought jeanne wrote #was actually Her own book #jeanne works with marie. maybe she comes up with the ideas and does rough drawings that marie would be Delighted to bring to life #marie reads to jeanne is my image #jalter taught herself how to read and write and i think that was possible because of the unstability of her existence #if you try to teach jeanne how to read and write it will stick for a second but if like idk 15-20 min pass she would likely find herself #unable to read again and her writting to be suboptimal #she can sign her own name ofc thats historical #she can recite the bible from memory iirc #i love jalter's ability to be her own person even if it comes with the fact that she is very much. an ephemeral dream #like her FCKING SKILL IS CALLED. #WHY MUST YOU HURT ME LIKE THIS FGO #anyway. now jeanne again but physical #oughhh thank u for the support in the tags when i said jeanne should have self image issues because she looked different in life #i hadnt fully talked bout it i just went with hair but yeah. i need to check again because im pretty sure her body wasnt Suuuper different #but i just gotta confirm #but im just so i love the idea of her just not liking the way she manifested abd not knowing Why she manifested like that #when there are Countless depictions of her with her short brown hair #sieg looks to the side whistling (its not his fault but he knows the pseudo servant part #and its probably a mix of . fate apocrypha's manifestation and of how some people imagined jeanne looked like #but it still upsets her #not that she'd ever complain to people #you can probably get it out of her tho #unrelated and only to those who reached this far: im thinking of a singularity set in 15th century orleans in the Middle of the hundred year #war. but the difference aint “oh jeanne d'arc came back to life evil” rather than “there seems to be a battle here where it shouldnt and oh #my god is that jeanne- oh god jeanne d'arc fucking died-- #and chaldeas has to try and fix the war without living breathing jeanne d'arc #actually thats not the middle of the 100yearwar but yknow what i mean. also haha jk unless...

[pallases]

ourgejjg

#i am feeling so ill rn for no reason and i need to shower and wash my hair so bad but i can tell if i do it rn it’ll make the #lightheadedness ten times worse and there is a nonzero chance i will just pass out in there 😭 #best guess is bc my period started today and yeah the first two days suck but they’re not usually This bad #personal #also this is the last thing i need rn it’s tech week and all rehearsals lately have been going/are going to go till 10 pm and i have no tim #to do all my assignments and my probability prof assigned a lab today that’s due TMRW AT MIDNIGHT? <- we usually get a class period btwn #it being assigned and the deadline and he’s not even giving us until the next class period to do it now like why is it due at midnight #instead of noon the next day… also i have not one but two exams immediately following this weekend and i really want to see my family for #easter but that sounds like such a bad idea im so unproductive at home and i’ll be busier than usual when i go home on top of that bc easte #and one of the exams is circuits for which exams are worth 90% of our grade and im averaging a 74% at the moment which is NOT #promising and. AAAAA #also have an exam this thursday which imnot nearly as worried abt but still. and i have to meet w someone abt a scholarship tmrw during my #free period so i Still can’t work on that stupid lab due tmrw night like. this sucks okay ‼️ #the engineering chronicles #the music chronicles #i know it was only a matter of time before musical started stressing me out but 😭 please give me back the joys of saturday’s rehearsal… #oh also there’s ANOTHER probability lab due day after easter and same day as circuits exam and the prof is the same so he knows full well #what he’s doing like. why are you not giving us the usual period in btwn for these anymore fuck you <3 #OH ALSO soldering qualification i need to do for like 3 hours wednesday the night before my thursday exam. nearly forgot abt that one i hat #it hereeee #soldering i could reschedule tho which i might do. but ive already pushed it back once so im like :/ do i really wanna do that #idk. still feel sick as fuck and still need to do physics prelab tonight 😭 it shouldn’t take long but i really don’t want to get up and #stare at my computer even more ifeel so awful rn #ANYWAY. sorry that was oversharing even for me i am just 😐 you know.

[sevicia]

I wanted to make a cleaner summary of last week's classes and also review the classes I have this week since the material is already uploaded beforehand but I was feeling so horrible throughout the day that when I sat down I was just gonna look at the ones for tomorrow but I think I'm just gonna go to bed because I just gave my little numbers game a few tries and not even the joy of tribial elementary school-level math games is bringing my brain cells and/or full sentience back

#diary #accessing it through the CMD thing and not just running it from the IDE made me realize a few things about it though so I'll hav #I'll have to maybe jot them down somewhere when I'd normally just be rly excited and try to fix them straight away like I am truly fucked r #I do wanna make an eng version of it sometime soon so I can share it even tho it's literally the simplest little thing. it's fun if you're #an easily amused nerd that loves playing with numbers in a truly useless manner. if that makes sense #also very obviously text-only I am NOT torturing myself with any graphics of ANY kind rn #it closes immediatly as they do and also when it comes to having double/triple digit starting numbers it becomes a lot less fun I think tho #though I haven't used it much with those yet #I still wanna figure out a way of making it better when it comes to 2/3 digit starters. and my original idea included maybe keeping track #keeping track of how many steps you took even between different rounds but I made the simplest version for now. I also think making like a #''this was the least amount of steps possible!'' type thing would be very very cool but that is FAR too big brained for me rn #cause I can figure out how to do the record keeping thing but that last one is like. let's stop talking for a little while................. #oh but adding an actual interface sounds so fun even though I have very little clue on how to do that rn I could probably STOP typing becau #because I can feel my stupid ass self start getting excited about this which will make it so I start working on it instead of going to bed #NO. DOWN !!!!!!!!!!!!!! auhgh............ oh man I had a lame joke to make but I completely forgot what it was #I have coding class tomorrow in which I normally just do the exercises as fast as possible before playing around but the only Python editor #I could find installed on the school computers was Visual Studio Code and I have no clue how to use that shit like I don't need so many #so many buttons. probz. OKAY GOODNIGHT