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dilfl0v3rss · 11 months

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restriction

“why you keep playin’ wit me ma?” your hands were held behind your back as ony pounded into you. ass clapping onto his stomach each time he pulled back from penetrating your g spot. you believed you absolutely did NOT deserve this treatment and no matter how much you wanted to scream out to him, you will not be giving your boyfriend the satisfaction of seeing you break. as you continued to defy him, you thought about what got you here in the first place…

papa🫶🏽

‘you got two minutes to get in this car or im da leaving you home’

you roll your eyes at onyankopon’s impatience. how he gon offer to take you to the mall then complain about how long you were taking to get ready? if you knew this was how he was going to act you would’ve declined without hesitation. you were just finishing putting lotion on your body after leaving the shower when you got the text so you decided to just threw on a sundress, cropped jean jacket, and slides so you don’t get left. you had recently gotten a silk press so it made the most sense to just quickly throw your hair up in a ponytail before jetting out of the house.

ony admired you from the drivers seat, licking his lips while staring you up and down. he looked like he wanted to eat you. truth is, he loved seeing you without makeup. the lipgloss and lashes combo always making him so weak, but rest assured he still felt you looked beautiful either way regardless if you had a full face or not. the attitude that was bubbling in you was quickly diminished when you were greeted with his large hand on your neck and a slow kiss on the lips. “ooouuu you look so good mama” ony said as he started playing with your ponytail. he loved how natural you looked. your beautiful skin and hair was making him want to drop all of his plans a take you right now in the driveway. “thank you boo now let’s gooooo” you smiled as ony pulled out and started his journey to the mall.

right when you walked into your first store you realized that you were in such a rush because of ony that you forgot to put on some panties. fear instantly rushed through you as you skimmed through the clothes on the rack, looking behind you to see your boyfriend scrolling through his phone. “you need any help with anything?” you whip your head around to the employee who snatched you from your thought. she was offering her assistance on a dress you were eyeing.

as you spoke to her about sizes you can almost sence your boyfriends stare. being the protective man that he was, ony walked up behind you to listen to what was going on. “yea they’ll both fit but i think this one would fit a little tighter and will help really show off your figure.” the employee said as she pointed to the smaller black dress in your left hand. she insisted that you try them both on anyways to see your yourself.

the fear that was instilled in you was forgotten as you mindlessly walked towards the fitting rooms. your slides clapping onto the floor as you moved. your man loved the way you walked, but he absolutely hated when you dragged your feet like this. the clapping sound so loud in the store making him lift his head from his phone to complain. that was until he realized that something was off about your dress.

your ass always moved when you walked and since you wore thongs often it could be easy to assume that you weren’t wearing underwear when you actually were. but that assumption is always easily debunked when your boyfriend could grab your waist and feel your panties sitting nicely on your hips, so instead of jumping to conclusions he decided that he’d try that first.

“gimme a kiss ‘fore you go in there” ony says with a fake smile as you hang the dresses up on the hook connected to the door. you absentmindedly turn around to give your boyfriend a kiss, mistaking his uncertainty for his regular clingy attitude. as he massaged your hips ony instantly got the answer he was dreading. you had no fucking panties on. it was never really an issue when panties were discarded with other clothes like pajama pants or some baggy sweatpants, but when it came to dresses he always preferred you to wear them. especially since you gave him shit for free balling with sweats so he felt that the least you could do was keep the same energy.

you turned back around to walk into the dressing room when your movements are halted by ony’s hand around your wrist. “you got panties on?” your eyes slightly widened as your memory returned to you. scared shitless that if ony was even the slightest bit suspicious with your answer he’d embarrass you. “mhm” before you can say anything else, you are lightly pushing into the small room, your boyfriend towering over you as he stood in front of the now closed door. “aight lemme see then.” you were done for…

and now you’re here. getting your guts rearranged from behind as your angry boyfriend held your wrists in his hand. “why you keep playin’ wit me ma?” you couldn’t even reply with how deep into you he was hitting. all excuses that were attempted quickly shot down with even harder thrusts. “and don’t blame me again cause puttin’ panties on only take like two seconds” it’s not like you purposely ignored putting on your underwear. you really were in such a hurry that they were forgotten, but ony wasn’t hearing none of that as he picked up his pace, feeding you all eight inches of his dick.

“da-daddyyyy im finna cu-ummm” he didn’t let up one bit as he kept on punishing your pussy. slapping you on the ass with his free hand before sliding it up your back. he gripped the back of your neck. “hold. that. shit.” each word was matched with a hard thrust as your arch deepened. you did as you were told, holding in that release while your pussy clenched around ony’s dick. you were so tight that it was getting harder for him to move around and that irritated him. he competed with your defiance with hard thrusts. “open that shit up ‘fore i really get mad”

“but i c-cant t-take it daddyyy” you whined as you tried to slowly crawl away from him. doing your best to take some of his inches out without the help of your arms. ony immediately caught on and put your other wrist in his free hand. yanking you upward as he thrusted into you so hard you screamed. he pounded into you at a quick pace, head slightly turning to see your tears drip from your face to the sheets. “you gon’ take all dis dick. i don’t give a damn if you pass out. you done when daddy say you done.” you were being absolutely destroyed right now.

your release was getting harder and harder to subdue at this new angle, but you knew if you didn’t hold it now you’d get done much worse later. this was easier said than done though since ony was deciding to whisper dirty words in your ear, hoping you’d defy him again so he can fix you. “shit so wet baby i’m starting to think you actually like pissing me off just so you can get fucked like a slut.” you grew wetter at your boyfriends words, trying your hardest to calm the tight coil in your stomach. ony knew you felt like you didn’t deserve this and he kinda agrees. he wasn’t even really mad that you weren’t wearing panties he was just mad because when he asked you about it you decided i’d be better to lie than come clean. then when you were caught you couldn’t even take responsibility and immediately pushed the blame to him.

“papa please i can’t take itttt” you whine, pulling ony out of his thoughts. he abruptly released your arms, letting you fall to the bed and fix your positioning. during this he kept stroking you roughly. if you weren’t going to say sorry on your own he was just going make you say sorry. ony licked up your back, not stopping until he reached behind your ear. he put both of his hands on the bed near each side of your head, leaning down so he can whisper dirty promises to you. you were ready to burst when you felt his wet tongue dance up your skin. ony knew it would make you weak, deciding to continue by licking and sucking on the back and sides of your neck.

“you like that? yea you do mama, i can feel you squeezin’ me” he was breaking you down. the strong defiance you once had was getting fucked right out of you and there was nothing you can do to stop it. well nothing you can do but apologize. “tell daddy you sorry mama. y’know ion play that shit” his deep voice sent shivers down your spine as he continued to stroke you to perfection. your walls fluttered around his thick dick as you felt your release begin to approach. “please pa it’s too much….m’gonna cummm” you ignored what he said, hoping he’d just let you cum. your whines fell on deaf ears as ony kept pounding into you, his plump brown lips kissing and licking all over your shoulder and neck as he waited for you to say what he wanted to hear.

your release was on the tip of your tongue now, the veins on his dick rubbing you perfectly as you began to try to fuck yourself back on him. every time you did this ony knew you were on the brink of a hard orgasm, the slick from your pussy only increasing as your g spot only needed a few more touches for you to reach heaven. a small smirk grew on your man’s face as he began stroking you so hard you saw stars. you were really being a brat today which he didn’t have the time for. if you really weren’t going to say sorry this way then he was going to use an even better punishment for you. your mouth opening in a silent scream as you gripped the sheets as tight as you can. the feeling of your sensitive clit rubbing the sheets as well as your entrance being fed deep strokes made your pretty brown eyes roll. your release was right there, on the tip of your tongue and all you needed was a little more to reach your end, but then it was gone…

ony stilled right inside of you, his heavy breathing chest making the both of your bodies move as you felt him shoot his thick ropes of cum into you “fuckkk mama….so tight” he groaned, rubbing his orgasm in your face before giving you a few more strokes and pulling out. a loud whine flew from your throat as you quickly reached behind you for his arm, trying and failing to get him to enter back inside of you. “daddy waittt m’so close” ony did nothing but laugh, getting off the bed before going towards the bathroom to run himself a shower.

“if you can’t apologize then i can’t fuck you. ima give you two weeks to get it together before i fuck you again”

#aot x black reader #onyankopon x black reader #onyankopon x reader #aot onyankopon #onyankopon x black!reader #aot smut #ony x black reader #onyankopon x black y/n #aot onyankopon x black reader #aot onyankopon x black y/n #aot onyankopon x black!reader

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widowmaxff · 5 months

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I’ve been having some bad days, could you write something where Y/N is having a rough week and pretends she’s fine except Wanda knows her daughter and comforts her?

I just love the way you write Wanda as a mother and that she just always knows

overwhelmed

pairings: mom!wanda maximoff × fem!reader

warnings: angst, reader crying, depressed reader — i think that's all!

a/n: tysm for your request love and im so sorry for your bad days, i really hope things get better for you and if you need someone to talk you can dm me, okay? <33

Interacting with any other human being was the last thing you wanted to do today. Saying that you had a bad week was an understatement, all the bad things that could happen to you happened. And not just things around you, but also your mind didn't stop for a second. You felt so overwhelmed that anyone could see on your face how much that week was hurting you.

"This can't be happening right now." You mumble as you feel the raindrops start to fall on your head. There was still more than half the way until you arrived at the Compound, you didn't have an umbrella, much less a coat to protect yourself from the cold that would come. No one could come and get you since everyone was busy and you didn't want to disturb your mother, she had enough problems to deal with yours.

You were coming home from school after another stressful day. You've spent the last few weeks studying for an incredibly difficult test, especially in a subject you had difficulty with, and seeing that big red note made your urge to cry even more. You studied so much that you thought it was impossible for that to happen. So many nights without having slept and so many energy drinks wasted for nothing.

You were absolutely soaked when you stepped into the Compound. Your sneakers made a funny noise when you stepped on them, but the only thing you wanted to do now was take them off your feet and throw them at the person closest to you, shouting in their face. "You're going to clean this up, Little Maximoff." Tony's annoying voice says, obviously joking, but still your head hurt just hearing that you had to do something that day. Your jaw tightens and you close your eyes tightly, taking a deep breath.

"I know, Tony." You ramble, trying to keep your voice as calm as possible. You walk past him to head towards your room, feeling your eyes burn from having something else on your list of things that made your week worse than it already was.

On normal days the first thing you would do was go look for your mother in her office, but the last thing you wanted to do that day was worry her, because you knew that the moment she laid eyes on you she would know that something was wrong. And filling her with your problems would make you feel guilty for a long time, you hated making people feel sorry for you and looking like you were a baby. You just needed to calm down, didn't you?

"Fuck!" You scream when you see all your notebooks soaked, especially your sketchbook, which you spent hours and hours drawing. You drop your things on the floor and run your hands through your hair, taking a deep breath. You wished your mother was there now, she would know what to do and help you with whatever you needed to calm down, but you put that idea out of your head before you ran towards her arms.

You enter the bathroom connected to your room and take off your clothes before you catch a cold. The hot water from the shower makes your muscles finally relax after the terrible days you prayed would end. In a few seconds you no longer knew what water was or what the tears on your face were. All those things that happened in your week came together into one, and you started to feel like you were on that empty, dark hole that took you a long time to get out of. You thought that maybe the problem was you, that maybe you deserved all those bad things, from the smallest to the ones that made you cry and scream like that moment.

You didn't hear the knock on your door because your bad thoughts were so loud that it was almost impossible to even hear the shower water hitting the floor. But when Wanda entered her room after hearing no response, she felt like something was wrong at the moment. She looks at your completely wet things lying on the floor and frowns. You told your mom you didn't need a ride home from school, but apparently, you did.

"Honey, is everything okay?" When she heard the shower turning off after long minutes, she knocked on the bathroom door just to let you know she was there and see if everything was okay. "Yeah, I'll be out in a minute." You say in a low voice, taking a deep breath. You knew that the moment you left the bathroom, your mother would know that your bad thoughts came back again, but you also knew that she wouldn't pressure you to say anything.

You close the bathroom door quietly, finally looking into Wanda's green eyes and seeing the worry through them. She held your backpack in her hands with her face confused at you, because she wouldn't think twice to get in the car and drive to you. "I was almost here at the Compound and the rain caught me." You chuckled, trying to hide your red eyes, your cheeks and the tip of your nose with the same color as your mother's hair.

"Are you okay, love?" She asks again, her face relaxed now. You put a fake smile on your face, but still with enormous affection for your mother.

"Yeah, just a little upset that my sketchbook got ruined, but it's okay." You don't completely lie. Yes, you were upset that your drawings would now have to go in the trash, but no, nothing was okay.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart." Wanda says approaching you. You just throw it away, muttering 'it's okay' but she wraps her arms around you, giving you a relaxing hug. Your mother leaves a long kiss on your head, making the urge to cry increase even more. You loved all the affectionate actions that your mother gave you, it made you feel so vulnerable and light. "Come on, let's get you something to eat, shall we?" You didn't like eating when you were feeling bad like that, you felt like you were going to throw up when you put anything in your stomach because of the anxiety, but you just agreed.

You were so lost in your thoughts that you didn't even notice when you arrived in the kitchen which, unfortunately, was made up of a few people. You felt so overwhelmed that being in the same environment as some people made you feel even worse. The small group of Avengers on your left irritated you. The loud noises they made. The conversations. The sound of people swallowing food. The tapping of Steve's shoe on the floor. Everything irritated you. From the small scratches on the counter to the farthest lamp that blinked every one minute and two seconds. Wanda noticed that. She noticed that you were itching to keep from freaking out. That you closed your eyes tightly trying to ignore your surroundings. That she needed to do something to help. She wanted to come to you and ask what intrigued you so much. What made you take deep breaths and crack your fingers every second was curious.

"Thank you, momma." She almost didn't hear you because of your low and hoarse voice. Wanda leaves a kiss on your head as she watches your foot bouncing up and down, eating the sandwich she made.

Wanda debated in her head what she could do to make you feel better. She knew she couldn't pressure you into saying anything, but she was so worried that she would do anything to see you well again. And even if it got to the point where she had to read your mind, she couldn't. You somehow managed to block your mother from reading your thoughts and seeing what was wrong.

You place your plate in the sink, taking a deep breath. Finally you would get away from people and that feeling of anxiety would finally leave you, that's what you thought. You thought that just a few hours of lying in bed doing nothing would solve your problems, but deep down, you knew that wasn't what would happen. And, now walking towards your room, not even your plan of closing yourself under the covers would be complete, as your mother followed you with the comfortable atmosphere that she always exuded.

You lie in your bed watching your mother calmly wait for your permission to lie down next to you. You nod to her with a smile on your face. Wanda puts her arms around your body, running her hand on your back, making your body relax. You loved these moments between the two of you, you realized how important you are to her and how loved you are. "You know you can always talk to me, don't you?" She murmurs, making you lean into her even more. Your face was in the crook of her neck, hiding how your lip trembled trying to hold back your crying. "I love you so much, sweetheart."

You finally let out a sob when Wanda murmurs those words that came out of her mouth so sweetly. Her grip around you tightens as she feels tears fall onto the skin of her neck, leaving a kiss on your head. The caress on your back never stopped, reassuring you that you were safe in your mother's arms. "It's okay, baby. Everything's going to be okay." You hated crying out loud, but at that moment you couldn't control all those feelings that made your heart ache spilling across your face, and Wanda was there to remind you that it was okay to cry and feel that way. "I-I'm sorry."

"Honey... we never apologize because of our emotions, right? Never." Wanda pulls you to place you on her lap, making you lay your head on her chest. You start playing with the hem of your mother's shirt, sniffling as you try to think of words you could say to her. "Do you want to talk about it, детка?"

"It was just... a bad week." You murmur, snuggling even closer to Wanda, feeling her heartbeat in your ear, which made you calm down a little more. "I just- I'm just feeling so overwhelmed and... and I don't know what to do."

"Oh, baby... it's okay. We'll get through this, yeah? It's okay to feel this way and I'll help you with whatever you need, my love." She strokes your hair, making your body relax in her lap. You agree, feeling her comfortable words enter your ears and help you with the horrible thoughts. "You're so strong, honey. Remember you're not alone, okay?" You mumble something, agreeing with her. You never knew how Wanda could make you feel better with just a few words, maybe it was her magic? You never knew. But she would always be your best friend and the person who would always make you feel better again. "Thank you, momma."

You would never be able to explain how grateful you were to have your mother by your side, because there are so many people in the world who don't have that comfort, and just thinking about not having someone to help you through your episodes made you feel sick. Even if she didn't say it, you knew Wanda was afraid you'd go back to that time when the hole was deeper than it is now. You remember exactly how she cried with you when you vented to her about everything you were feeling, and how she helped you every step of the way again.

"You don't need to thank me, детка. I love you so much, okay? I will always be by your side, on whatever you need." And you knew she was telling the truth, because Wanda loves you so much. You will always be her little miracle and the most important thing in her life. She feels so proud of you, because she knows that you can get through this, that you are strong enough to get through all the challenges in your life. She believes in your ability to overcome these difficult times - because you can - and there will always be people to support and walk alongside you, because you'll never be alone.

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admiringtheskies · 10 months

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okay, so The Hyperfixation Is Hyperfixating, clearly, and honestly im just gonna continue going with it bc THEM— *screams* ANYWAYS @frownyalfred uhhhhhh hope you enjoy this as well! without further ado, another idea inspired by the incomparable ✨borderline✨ that just would NOT leave me alone until i got it all down into actual real words:

at some point further in the timeline of borderline'verse, when they've finally got the whole situation mostly under control, the batfam (whenever they accompany bruce, or multiple kids go together by themselves so they're in batclan mode, to do jl/other crossover shit) sort of ends up just doing the whole Bat-Danger-Aura thing, like, Constantly; somewhat unintentionally, but also with not much effort really made to rein it in, bc they do think the reactions are hilarious lol. and like, the thing is, they were ALREADY doing it pre-bond, pretty much right from whenever dick, jason, or both made their first appearance w bruce outside of gotham and first established the existence of mini-bats for the outside world — i mean, that sense of leashed power, as well as the eerie synchronicity and ability to communicate in the tiniest of gestures, was really just a natural consequence of the crime-fighting codependency and the training bruce put them through, originally. (as you may be able to tell, i have an Extremely Normal Amount of Feelings about the concept of cryptid batfam <3). but WITH the bond?? i mean, the kids are all connected to each other, yes, but their primary connections are all to BRUCE, and once they've had time to adjust, and set + actually semi-consistently enforce some basic boundaries, they absolutely take pride in using that to it's fullest advantage (that they're capable of while not intentionally compromising anybody's autonomy, anyways).

and like… OP's already touched on this in earlier chapters briefly a few times, but i NEED a thorough exploration of the idea of bruce seeing this change in them, seeing them subconsciously incorporate even just these little subtle mannerisms, and feeling so fucking guilty about it and spiraling bc he's terrified that all of his self-destructive qualities [that he's painfully aware of in himself] will transfer over to the children, who somehow never seem to realize that how proud and grateful they make him when they demonstrate their DIFFERENCES from him in those regards. and he's just so scared that he'll somehow ruin the few parts of them he thinks he's miraculously managed to avoid 'tainting' with his mentorship/fatherhood until now… …and meanwhile the kids are about to start crying because dad no what the fuck,,, but also facepalming a little bit bc jesus CHRIST, B, did you never even stop to consider the fact that you're just… really fuckin smart and skilled and know how to do a frankly ungodly amount of Cool Shit that we all share an interest in, and we were excited to have the chance to copy more of that shit too?! just, even beyond the great mental image of the Danger Walk, what really got me about that scene was just... his two oldest boys, who are already so much like him, not hesitating for a SECOND to gleefully take the chance to match his behavior even MORE perfectly, and wanting to know where he learned something as (relatively, by their standards) simple as the Serious Business Walk, and wanting to share that memory because it's just fuckin cool, y'all! like, to be clear, i absolutely respect the fact that, at least by the time that they're entering adulthood/in the prime of their mental and physical youth, any of the batkids are pretty much on, or definitely rapidly approaching, the same level as bruce in general badassery — and they probably each have 1 or 2 specific skillsets in which they can and do surpass him. but at the same time, you CANNOT convince me that, at any given point in the established DC timeline, there exists a non-bruce batfam character who can really look at bruce (like his personality, his aforementioned ridiculous skillset, i mean everything about him) and not see at least ONE quality in him that they aspire to. maybe it's something they already have and just can't see in themselves, maybe it's more a projection of something one of their other siblings has and shares with bruce, maybe it's just some skill, some random combat move, that he doesn't need very often, and so when he does use it, it briefly reminds them that "holy shit, he's The Fucking Batman" — but there's always SOMETHING there, some reason that even when they're having trouble communicating or arguing or emotions are running high, they'll never truly lose that respect for him that compels these ridiculously independent, self-sufficient people to willingly follow him: to listen to him, to trust him, and to keep themselves ready to unite under his lead. because nobody can argue that they are a clan, whose purpose comes from being first united under the guidance and protection and love of the bat.

#borderline #batman #batfam #bruce wayne meta #bruce wayne is a good dad #dc batman #cryptid batfam #telepathic connection

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evvlevie · 6 months

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MANIFESTATION / LUCID DREAMING / SHIFTING SUCCESS STORY!!!!

EVIE HIIII 🫶 happily entering your answering box with a success story that happened today INVOLVING the implementation of something you posted recently!!

I woke up at 6:38am this morning after lucid dreaming & making a portal to shift to my intended reality IN IT!!! IM SO SO HAPPY OML. Master shifter Master Manifestor Master Lucid dreamer‼️‼️

—————

LUCID DREAM + SHIFT TO HOME

I’ll start from yesterday + recently

The other day I read your recent post how you’ve had this little spray bottle beside your bed and before you sleep you spray it on you 4 times and say “this is my shifting spray, I will now shift tonight” and I DO have a little bottle of spray water on my bedside table I thought this was cute I should do this!! and implement it in my routine!! This was like 3 days? Ago? I did it consistently every night.

Then last night/ morning when I slept at like 2am? I felt drawn to my new dragons blood crystal I got recently, even though this Crystal I hadn’t cleansed and changed it yet, since it was the beginning of Yule as well and I’d just meditated prior I decided I’ll do a quick cleanse and charge so I can use it. I usually fall asleep holding a Crystal in either hand - one being my labradorite absolutely connected to me and one being whatever I felt drawn to. So I quickly cleansed and charged it then I sprayed my little bottle of water 4 times & said “this is my shifting spray I will now shift tonight.”

Four other things to note -

1. I have insanely impressive dream recall

2. I have briefly lucid dreamt before but not as intense/proper as this

3. Lucid dreaming method of shifting like creating a portal in your lucid dream to shift I’ve always thought was cool but never fully fully tried to do it because I’ve always believed that intent is the only thing you need to shift so just sleep with the intent to wake up whenever I’m not a big fan of “methods”

4. And finally for the last week or so I’ve begun doing reality checks every day not being phased by how fast or long I began lucid dreaming (detached from outcome like I wasn’t TRYING to lucid dream for my shifting immediately I just began doing it KNOWING that it’d happen!)

NOW we get to my dream part, I go to sleep dream and dream and dream

TW: next part mentions the term abuser

SO I was at my abusers house in the dream (whom I’ve now moved out/away from because I deserve the best!!) and they were doing a range of abusive things. I went into my room and stopped, I thought- wait I thought I already escaped them? Referring to my waking life how I HAD escaped them manifested living in a better place!! When I realised this I looked down at my hands and pushed my right hand through my left (my fav reality check) and it went through & disappeared. I then counted 4 on my left and 5 on my right

I KNEW I was dreaming. I became lucid !!! I know many people forget they want to shift when they become lucid so I was grateful that I didn’t forget and it was one of my first thoughts. To further confirm that I was dreaming I grabbed a pen and tried writing my name on my palm and it came out as a different name entirely?? Astrid. It was hard to read. Then I begun my portal moving my hands in my doctor strange type opening portal way saying “open portal to *DR NAME* open portal to my home *DR NAME*” like I practiced and I thought about how I want to try get my portal done quickly because I remembered that one story about a girl who became lucid then all these bad things started happening to her in it😭 I knew I was lucid dreaming and I knew the goal was to shift to my home!!

MY PORTAL OPENED. to some random place, I kept focusing on it and repeating “open portal to my home in *DR PLACE*” it glitched to a different place, this beautiful forest that did indeed look similar to home but there was a building with turned edges so when I awoke I believed that that was to like japan or something. I was SO SO close to shifting to my home through my lucid dream SO close. Then I woke up at 6:38am and I messaged my friend all about it immediately after it happened. I was so SO SO HAPPY.

Additionally, I explained how I held my new Crystal when I slept earlier because one of the benefits of dragons blood is massive assisting in manifesting one’s dreams / desires + opens 3rd eye + assisting in lucid dreaming & dream work WITH the combination of my labradorite’s endless assistance with raising consciousness helping with reality shifting manifesting etc etc etc. I’ve also been recently adding in “I lucid dream every night” into my affirmations lately manifesting so máster manifestor at work 😮‍💨😮‍💨‼️‼️literally manifested that instantly. (Like I always do)

SO I LUCID DREAMT. LIKE A PROPER PROPER LUCID DREAM AND I WAS A JUMP AWAY FROM HOME. A JUMP. A PORTAL A JUMP. SO INSANELY CLOSE

I had to come share it with you because I think you’ll find it interesting that I implemented what you’d begun doing with the spray and sentence intent into my routine and had success!!

Do you or do you have any post or does anyone reading this have any advice for shifting through lucid dreaming?? I honestly haven’t read much to at all about how to do it I just knew you could open portals to shift in them. I opened my portal and was repeating my intent- it looked like it was trying to get there but it was showing other places- does one just continue that? Any advice? :)

Also it shows how instant manifestation is and how I’d detached from the outcome and it came.

And if anyone is reading this needing motivation “your actions today create tomorrow’s future” you can literally have anything and be anything you want, it’s all going to work out I promise!!

ANYWAY THATS ALL

❤️‍🔥YOU EVIE

Xoxo

- Master Manifestor, Reality shifter & Lucid Dreamer of the multiverse.

HIIIIII ❣️❣️❣️

I AM SO STOKED FOR YOU !!!!!!

I am so happy that my „routine“ inspired you, and that you got so incredibly close to shifting 😻😻😻

unfortunately I have zero experience when it comes to shifting through lucid dreaming, especially because usually when I become aware that I am dreaming I automatically wake up, so it‘s definitely not my method of choice.

I am glad tho, to see that my message, that you manifest as soon as you just let the universe do its thing, has helped you on this journey ❤️❤️❤️

thank you so so so much for your story, and happy shifting 😽❤️

yours in every reality,

Evie <3

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thisismeracing · 7 months

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ok so since i had dance practice today

mick and hamilton!reader would absolutely be the types to dance in the kitchen

waltzing would be their sleepy, i want to touch you but also dance but also im dead on my feet but still want to dance

and since salsa requires more energy to at would be their we’re making lunch but the food needs to sit in the pan for a bit and we have the space and time to be wrapped up in each other dance

i think they wouldnt dance in public at first cause they want this to just be their thing before its something the world knows

but one day on the paddock someone accidentally connects to a bluetooth speaker and one of their salsa songs come son and before anyone knows it mick has pulled hamilton reader close and they are in their own world salsa-ing around

everyone is like where is this music coming from and why is it so loud??? and then they turn their heads towards them two and they just watch in stunned silence and adoration

lewis is a smiling wideeeeeeee cause thats his sister!!!!! and her man treats her so welllllll

[sidebar: lewis was the one to teach hamilton!reader the waltz, but reader and mick learned the salsa by themselves]

the engineer’s phone who was desperately trying to disconnect let the song run cause they arent going to take away this moment from them

and at the end the surrounding garages give a round of applause

(maybe lewis pulls him aside later and jokingly, but not really, and gives him his blessing and he better see a ring on his sisters ring soon. mick totally isnt shitting bricks when he says that and then reader, unknowingly saves him from her brother to take him away cause its time to go home)

☕️

first of all, it's so cool you dance!!! I love it <3

second, yes, hamilton!reader and mick would totally dance, they have their own playlist after all, we should expect something like this from these two. They would waltz to the piano version of King of my heart, Mick just got home from sim work, and Yn is super tired and had just gotten home too, she's putting something together for dinner, and their shared playlist just ended, so now Spotify is playing similar stuff, and for some reason, it started playing the piano version of their song. Mick, who had just reached the kitchen door, hugged her tight, kissing her temple, and relaxing with her scent and touch. It was seconds, and they were still hugging so one of them casually started to move, and the other followed, and then they were just quietly dancing in each other's arms.

It would take a bit for them to get the hang of Salsa, but it was so much fun to learn with each other. They would share some tutorials, and their algorithm would help by suggesting salsa songs and TikToks. She would make fun of him, but also encourage him - get this right and I'm kissing you on the lips, one step wrong the kiss is on the cheek, and so on, all while in the kitchen. Some days they would move the sessions to the living room, dragging the coffee table to the corner of the room, and just having their fun. Angie would bark here and there especially when they would laugh, she would love to watch those two.

OMG OMG But the look they would share the second the music started playing, silently deciding if they would dance to this or just pretend it wasn't happening, but then Mick was grabbing her hand, and it started small, just one foot here, other there, but then you were dancing for real, and the whole time they were smiling at each other, eyes never leaving the other.

Lewis is the proud brother, and he would totally snap a small video of it (that thing about having a shared folder with Gina), whereas he's also the protective brother so yeah, he would tell how happier reader seems to be and how Yn happy means he's happy too, and meanwhile Mick is just nodding unaware of this is going, sipping his coffee, and watching Lewis go through his salad, at this point, Lewis is more talking than eating his food. And then boom, he asks when he'll be seeing a ring on her finger, and Mick chokes on his coffee, gulps at the tricky situation, and before he can confess to Lewis that he, in fact, got his mom's ring just a few weeks back, but he would probably wait a bit, Yn barges into the room laughing with Bono and Mick breaths in relief.

Side note: I am in love with all your hamilton!reader thots <3 the way you got them is just *chef kiss*

King of My Heart Masterlist

#☕️ anon #thots #komh #hamilton!reader #millies inbox #ms47 #mick schumacher #f1 x reader

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wisecrackingeric-2 · 8 months

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Luis ramble time

TW//homophobia??

I think my favorite thing about Luis has to be the idea that his religious trauma led him to become homophobic but not in the sense of how it normally is. I think he internalized it as he grew up in a Catholic setting and became more interested in other people. This is why I believe he probably wouldn't have kissed Leon,,he will flirt and make flirty gestures but I don't really believe he'd full on go for it. I think it's more believable that he would've felt guilty because we all know one thing Luis still holds dear is his religion.

To me Luis is bisexual and when he met Leon it made him remember those odd feeling but he was to afraid to express them both from fear of loosing Leon and the feeling of being sinful. (this comes from someone who connects to Luis in these regards,,dw I came to terms with myself awhile ago!) And just like everything else in his life he ran away from it and ultimately..

He never let himself feel those emotions nor tell Leon

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG TO GET TO BUT YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW FERAL I WENT OVER THIS I STARTED GOING DOWN SUCH A LONG RABBIT HOLE OUUUUGHHH

BUT YOURE SO RIGHT YOU HAVE A BIT BEAUTIFUL BRAIN IT HURTS SM,,,,,,,, I think you’re absolutely right but I wanted to add my own headcannons too cuz I think it could be a very very interesting discussion!!!!!! I’ve put my thoughts under the cut so it doesn’t clog up peoples dashboards!!!!

I couldn’t agree more I think it’d be pretty safe ro say Luis has a FAIR BIT of internalised homophobia from his religious upbringing (now I wanna clarify that I don’t have any religious trauma like, at all, I wasn’t brought up relifious but I have TONS of friends who’ve gone through it so I’ve done my best to understand it best I can!!!!) and where my headcannon sliiiiiiiightly differs from yours is that I think Luis probably would have come to terms with his own queerness by the time he’s working with Umbrella

Obviously he’s already very flamboyant and VERRRRYYY flirty w both men and women and he’s clearly confident in himself- but what a lot of people seem to forget that the lovely @blveherb and @possessionisamyth have gone into detail about is that Luis is an immigrant, and if you look at literally any piece of history from before like,,,, roughly around the 80’s queer and immigrant history were REALLY intertwined, like, the two communities would often be at the same places or facing the same struggles at the same time etc and obviously white historians haven’t done us any favours with preserving this history (and ALSO also i am WHITE AS ALL HELL so im obviously not in a position to be speaking on topics that i dont fully understand/havent affected me which is why i ask that if anyone is more knowledgable on the topic please do elaborate on it!!!!!!!)((also it’s obviously very very important not to try and take away focus from or erase poc history when talking about queer history!!!!!!!!!!!!!))

So I don’t think it would be much of a stretch to say that Luis, after leaving Valdelobos and ending up wherever he did, would have also discovered the queer community as a whole just by virtue of being apart of a minority (again, this isn’t something that’s ever even remotely effected me so please if I’ve made any mistakes or if anyone wants to point anything out do so!!!!) also I just imagine that, in general, Luis would’ve been grateful for any kind of community to fall back on after he left his own- how old he was when he left is unknown obviously but I can’t imagine being barely even an adult discovering the big wide world for the first time after spending your entire life in a tiny rural catholic village would’ve been easy which is why communities like that are so important (also you could absolutely go into how Umbrella would’ve fed that need for a community even further in a young naive Luis but that’s getting ahead of the subject)

Also somewhat on and off topic but M A A N Y historians have pointed out that Don Quixote is a pretty queer fricken book. That’s an entirely different discussion in and of itself but the whole book itself, the relationship between Alonso and Sancho, the history itself surrounding the book etc can leave a lot of queer interpretations to be read (and @highball66 has pointed out that while not specifically a term used for gay men, in some areas ‘Sancho’ has been used to refer to ‘the other guy in the relationship’, ie the man the husband is sleeping with etc) ((AND also it’s just,, kinda hard to analyse super old books through the lens of the LGBTQ+ community as we understand it roday- Kaz Rowe on YouTube has some good videos on the topic I can’t reccomend enough!!!!))

And so I personally like to imagine that by the time he returns BACK to Valdelobos, he’s probably come to terms with it- but like most traumas, returning to the place where it all started and manifested probably would’ve brought up those same feelings of internalised homophobia like you’ve said; which is why he’s so afraid to confess to Leon. Even if he KNOWS he’s come to terms with his identity n such, that doesn’t mean that returning to the place where it all started doesn’t bring back up those old feelings (also him returning home in the manor that he does just makes my theory/headcannon that he’s Trans go WILD but I’m saving that for ANOTHER DAY)

‘He holds Religion very Close to him’ GOD YOURE SO RIGHT ABT THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!! Like even if he doesn’t still believe in god or anything his upbringing still effects him!!!!!!!!!!!!! He still always does the sign of the cross whenever he sees a dead body and obviously that classic catholic guilt and need to repent follows his every actions alongside just, y’know, the average amount of guilt people would feel in his situation BCNEHENDJDND so can you imagine how much WORSE he’d feeling going BACK to Valdelobos and meeting LEON and having all those feelings and fears come up again???????????? OUGH WHY MAKE ME THINK ABT THIS OP /lh

AND and, like you mentioned, Luis always has this reoccurring theme of thinking he has more time than he actually has and that he can run away from anything. It’s honestly so so so very tragic; and just the idea of that cycle repeating AGAIN in something SO PERSONAL (ie, his love for Leon) is just,,,,,,,,,, o u g h it’s so heartbreaking man why would you say that I am strangling you /jjjjjjjj

Luis always thinks he has more time to fix his mistakes, to be a better person- and even when he starts to realise he doesn’t, he still holds out hope. He thinks, ‘tomorrow I’ll tell Leon’, but he never gets that opportunity.

And finally this one is purely self indulgent but I’ve always pictured Luis as being the kind of person to just be happy labelling himself as ‘queer’ cuz it’s quick and convinient but BISEXUAL LUIS SL TRUE

(Also obligatory ‘these are just headcannons/theories/analysis nobody is saying these are CANNON this is just an observation’ message!!!!!!!)

#ericswriting #dear god this turned out to be so much longer than I intended ABSBDBENDHDNXJDND #I have. thoughts #luis serra #this is subject to change ofc I’m no expert on poc history and I might add even more thoughts into this later xhdndhnsjdns #also also if you’re gonna be mean or homophobic in the replies. just don’t. please be nice I just wanna have a nice discussion abt Luis ok #but ofc if I’ve said anything incorrect/offensive PLEASE please tell me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#luis sera #luis serra navarro

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autisticlenaluthor · 2 months

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What's your take on Episode 7? 👀

I thought it was the best episode yet. it wasn't my favorite episode (I think the bus chaos episode is) but I think this one was the best in terms of writing/story/characterization.

(im gonna do my best to articulate my thoughts. idk how welll I'll do bc im in a verbal shut down but like i do have so many things I wish I could say)

first off, we saw so much vulnerability and so much insight into all of the girls.

the entire episode just had me wanting to reach out through the screen and give Sadie a hug. this episode humanized her (as it did all the girls) so much. it was the first time to me that I felt a true connection with her, rather than just a "she is my blorbo and I love her" favorite character vibe. Melissa is such an incredible actress, especially when given a good script, and you could just feel Sadie's stress through the screen.

the moment at the end with loafers was almost hard to watch. hearing him pile up on her, when you know what she's been through, and then watching it all come crashing down with the reveal of her needing an abortion was gut wrenching.

lola's storyline was also so important. we knew that there's a reason beneath the surface that she is the way she is, and I'd always kinda assumed her ferocity and how stubborn she is was a defense mechanism. but actually seeing it play out and confirmed was something else.

the scene where she went off on her candidate was a lot (for me to watch, not like, a lot in a bad way) but it all made so much sense. I think this episode also kinda showed us Lola being all high and mighty about everything stems from her trauma induced imposter syndrome. like-- the logic of calling her sister a nepo baby is fucking insane, because it means Lola, is a nepo baby too and just too stubborn to see it. but the scene with grace afterwards made it make so much sense.

and grace!! oh my god!! I loved all of the moments with her and Sadie. I loved her offering Sadie a hug, working side by side with her, and being her friend. the scene where she comes at Sadie hard again, is a lot, and for me was hard to watch, but it shows that even though Grace is changing. she is still her. she's written so consistently in her development, and I just love it.

also, the contrast between grace being too disconnected from her down daughter to be her mom, but taking Lola in, and mothering her so naturally. that juxtaposition was everything.

like it's so clear that Grace is afraid of vulnerability. but with Lola, it seems like there are just enough degrees of separation that Grace is able to be there for her the way she should be with Annie.

finally, Kimberlyn. I'd suspected her and Eric would come crashing down but truly, she just deserves so much better. everyone in her life keeps blaming her for going right back to work after her wedding-- seeming to forget, they weren't even supposed to get married that day. Eric dropped it on her out of nowhere, which means technically, Kimberlyn has absolutely no obligation to be being there for him as his wife right now.

but I love seeing Kimberlyn start to recognize her worth. she's been growing so much the past few episodes. and throwing out her passion planner-- it seems like she's getting ready for a fresh start??

idk. but im excited

#the girls on the bus #Sadie mccarthy #grace gordon greene #lola rahaii #Kimberly kendrick #GraLaKimDie #determined to make GraLaKimDie happen for my anon besties

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greazyfloz · 1 year

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Lovers & Strangers - Chapter 8

warning: nonconsentual creep + drug use

I walked into the party with all four girls, the music was absolutely blaring. I was late getting to the pregame so I’m not on the same level as the other girls…Yet. Nicole and I walk around the kitchen opening a bunch of cabinets looking for the liquor in Nolan’s house. We finally found it in the high cabinet above the fridge. Both Nicole and I are way too short to reach. Nicole gets onto her hands and knees and I step on her back to reach.

I was just able to reach the liquor, grabbing two bottles of vodka before stepping back on the ground. I hand her the half empty bottle and keep the brand new bottle for myself. We go back into the room where the other girls are and join the conversation they were having with a couple of frat boys we partied with last weekend.

Cassidy looks at the bottle in my hand then back up at me giving me a questioning look as I tilt the bottle back. She continues to stare as I swig it back and I just shrug at her. “Can we dance or something?” I ask and Nicole looks at me and smiles, taking my hand and pulling me away from the group so we can dance in the mob of people.

I continue drinking while dancing almost as if the vodka was water. I notice Mark staring at me across the room, looking good as always. I tilt my head and lean it back as I bite my lip softly at him, and he smirks, shaking his head walking into the kitchen. I noticed him staring at me throughout the night, but never could find Ethan.

The next time I catch him staring, I look at Nicole, “I need to pee, I’ll be right back” I mumble

“Want me to come?”

“No, because I’m actually going to fuck someone” I say but she is way to drunk to fully understand what I just said

“Okay” she mumbles

Now I’m alone staring back at Mark, I nod my head toward the downstairs bathroom, and start walking towards it. Mark understood what I was hinting at because when I looked back he was close behind. I look around before entering the bathroom. When we are both in the bathroom our mouths immediately connect.

We make out and I feel his hard cock rubbing against my leg eager to be free. I massage him through his pants as he reaches under the skirt I am wearing to pull my panties to the side sliding two fingers in. “Fuck Mark” I moan as he pumps in and out of me before curling his first making we whimper loud.

“That feels good baby?” he mumbles in my ear.

“Keep calling me baby” I moan out as I begin grinding my hips against his pumping fingers.

“Oh? You like that?” he says, “You still impressed by my thighs?” he smirks, “You want to rub your wet pussy on one of them?”

“Y-yes” I moan and Mark crashes his lips hard on mine as he backs us up closer to the toilet. He breaks the kiss putting the toilet seat cover on and sliding his pants off. I lifted my skirt up flipping so all I had to do was slide my panties off. Mark sat on the toilet and pats his leg.

I sit on one of his thighs and begin grinding my wetness all over. Mark leans forward to continue making out with me as he flexes his thigh. I moan out a little into the kiss and Mark smirks. “Ride my thigh fast baby” he instructs. I bite my lip, speeding up the pace as he begins shaking his leg up and down.

“Mark!” I moan out as my pussy crashes down hard on his thigh as im grinding him

“I need you on my cock babygirl” he says. I stand almost immediately swinging my leg over his other leg before inching closer to him. He rubs my pussy as he levels his cock into position. I look down at him and begin making out with him as I feel his tip of his cock rub back and forth on my slit. Once he stops and his tip in positioned I sink down on his cock moaning into his mouth. I began bouncing up and down forcefully as I had my legs to allow me to bounce faster.

“Oh my god!” I whimper as someone bangs on the door. We ignore them and Mark standing up and my pussy holds his cock. I wrap my legs around his waist and he places me on the counter beside the sink. He starts thrusting hard in and out, causing me to throw my head back and whimpering loudly.

“I’m cumming” he says continuing to thrust, “Oh fuck, I’m cuming!” he thrusts hard into me, filling me up. He pulls out of me and leans into my ear, “I bet you want to leave all my cum inside of you so you can feel it run down your bare legs, fucking slut” he says grabbing his boxers sliding them up then doing the same with his pants.

I lock the door again once Mark leaves and actually use the bathroom. I after wiping I try to push all of Mark’s liquid out of me before putting on my panties, fixing my skirt and entering the room again.

As I’m entering the room, I notice Caleb entering the party from the other side. Whatever I had last weekend sounds really good right now. I look around to see if the wandering eyes that were on me all night still were, I don’t see Mark or Ethan anywhere so I continue walking to the back of the house where Caleb was.

As he was walking by me I reached my arm out to block the way in front of him. “Hi” I say to him and he smiles at me.

“Hey”

“I need something, I don’t have any money, but I will buy more next weekend and bring extra money” I say nodding my head at him and he laughs

“You’re pretty, but not that pretty” he says laughing

“I have two canadians toonies” I say reaching in my back pocket making him laugh again

“Tell you what” he says looking down at the skirt I am wearing, nodding his head. “Open your mouth” he says digging in the baggy he just took out of his pocket. I let my bottom lip fall so my mouth was open just slightly as he slid one pill into my mouth and I watched his hand lift my hand to bring the bottle I was holding to my lips. I take a swig and swallow both the vodka and the pill. He holds another one up leveled with his head as he cocks his eyebrows almost to ask if I want another one. I nod slightly, almost looking scared.

Caleb comes back in and places the pill in my mouth. I take it upon myself to bring the vodka back up to my lips. “I like you” he says, biting his lips, “you’re a cool girl, that’s why I’m helping you out” he says making me smile. “Do you think I’m cool?” he says and I nod, he comes closer and starts playing with my skirt from the top trying to hike it up higher. He takes a step back and reaches in his pocket pulling out another pill then walks back towards me.

We are currently in the middle of the room, with what feels like thousands of people around us. “Open” he says and I obey him. “You’re turn to help me” he says as he puts the pill between his teeth and grabs the back of my head by the hair suddenly pulling me on to his lips. The pill enters my mouth as soon as our lips meet. I try to push him off me but he was pushing me onto his lips way too tightly. His hand slides down to my leg and up my skirt. I feel his fingers brush against my panties. “No” I say as I try again to push him off me when all of a sudden I see a hand pull his shoulder back, opening his body to reveal Mark.

“Caleb?” he asks while pointing at him, almost in a friendly way

“Ye-” he was suddenly interrupted by one hard punch knocking him out. Mark looks back at me then walks away. I look around to see a bunch of people staring at me.

The night went on and I found myself sitting on the kitchen counter by myself, because I wandered off and lost my friends.

Ethan walks in, “I’ve been looking for you all night” he says and comes over seeing how I’m sitting. He takes both my legs that were spread open and closes them, “Jesus Y/n! Keep your legs closed” he says and I start laughing really hard

“Are you calling me a slut?” I laugh out again as my legs start to slide open again.

“No, Your wearing a skirt” he says

“Am I making you horny?” I say giggling again

“Come on off the counter” He says

“No”

“I literally know what underwear your wearing”

“You probably think you know because you’re so use to taking them off for me” I say bringing him in close to me, “You can take them off right now if you want”

“Okay we are going home” he says grabbing my hips trying to slide me off the countertop. I hop on the ground

“You want to fuck me that bad we’re leaving the party early?”

“Uber’s here” he says looking up at me from his phone, He makes me walk in front of him so he can catch me if I fall. We walk through the semi empty house and on to the front porch

“Wait! Where’s my friends?”

“It’s 3:30, they probably went home” Ethen says in a voice that says ‘you’re testing my patience’

When we made it back to sophomore house, Mackie and Mark were in the kitchen when Ethan carried me over his shoulder. He sat me down on the couch for a second before then walked into the kitchen. He comes back out with water and Advil and Mark follows, “here, I got her” he says

“You sure?” Ethan says confused

“Yeah” he says and Ethan walks up the stairs, Mark bends down and lifts me up bridal style. Before walking he looks down at me long and hard but I can’t make the expression on his face.

“Hey Mark?” I ask as he starts walking, he doesn’t answer but he keeps walking, “I don’t think I hate you”

Mark's head doesn’t move but I can see his eyes look down at me for a second before we reach Ethan’s room. He puts me on the bed and walks to the door, he looks back at me quickly before leaving me.

I stand up and begin taking my clothes off until I am completely naked. I make my way to the bed as Ethan walks in the room, shutting the door behind him, “Lock it” I say but Ethan walks over to his dresser. I watch him take his shirt off then wrap one arm around him sliding it up his body, “Please Ethan”

“No,” he says, taking my hand off him.

“Are you mad at me?” I ask him and he turns around fast looking at me wide wide eyes

“Are you kidding me?”

“No, I didn’t think you were at the party so you can’t really be mad because I looked for you first and when I didn’t see you then I went and got more” I say and he just looks up at me with sadness filling his eyes

“I’m going to have to tell my parents, I can’t deal with this. You need help”

#ethan edwards #ethan edwards imagine #ethan edwards smut #mark estapa smut #mark estapa x reader #mark estapa #umich hockey smut #umich hockey imagine #umich imagine #umich hockey

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kkbardd · 3 months

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hello! i haven’t sent an ask in a while because schoolwork has been piling up infinitely :[ , but your recent posts have been really interesting to me! i really liked the room sketch one, I can’t exactly explain why but there’s something so indescribably human about it. i love spaces that looked lived in, that have personality, and I think that your room (current one? made up? old one?) has done a great job of showing that. and I’m not very good at giving advice— I can hardly follow it myself, but if you don’t know something, don’t know what you want to do, try things. it’s okay if you don’t like them. i recently found out I’m more competent in languages than I thought! i can already read and understand simple sentences in german.

there’s always more to yourself than you’ll know, I think, but the world is kinder than people think. If anything, everyone is still very new at this. we’ve never lived before. do the things you like, branch out, don’t become less of yourself for other people. everything has a place, and my best advice is to treat life as you would a vacation. do all the things you can while you’re here. build a life that makes it worth it. (sorry for the long ask and my rambling, or if this is overstepping in any way. i just read what you wrote and kind of related to it in a way. thank you for continuing to create art, it brings me a lot of joy! :] )

hey isopod!!! thanks for the ask & I wish u good luck with ur school work!

Thank u so much for the compliments, im really glad the vibe of my room was conveyed in those doodles. i absolutely looove drawing my room! It’s extremely small (a renovated utility closet) and just barely fits a bed + my desk but its packed full of the things i love. It’s very lived in and I feel like it reflects my character well.

when i drew that page I was in my senior year of high school and pressures to decide my future were overwhelming. I never thought much about it until then and I didn’t have any idea of what I was going to do. The only thing I felt I had going for me was art but I didn’t want to turn my only hobby into a job I hated. I remember going through a master list of majors on random college websites and one-by-one asking myself if I’d be okay doing it. In the end I had nothing. I was really crushed about it and felt stuck. This was right after the covid quarantine too so focusing in school was difficult & I couldn’t bring myself to apply for scholarships. I started skipping classes, smoking weed, and pushing off my assignments. All of this only made me feel more miserable, of course, so everything seemed pretty bleak at the time.

But luckily I had the support of my family and especially my mother. She would always remind me that “we have option”, “we always have options”. Because I did! This was a fresh start to try my hand at a totally different experience than what I’ve done so far. I ended up choosing my major on a complete whim after hearing my aunt had a job in an adjacent field. I was pretty sure I’d drop out after a semester, yet here I am about to graduate soon & I’m having a ton of fun!! (Hell, I’m 10 hours out in the middle of nowhere right now for my Field Methods class!) It’s not that I had a knack for Geology that I just never tapped into, or that i secretly had a passion for rocks this entire time; I just found something that seemed like an okay fit and grew interest from there. I think that a small level of commitment like that is more than enough to get you going. I had a ton of ideas in my head about how I needed to have a perfect fit major that would connect every dot I’ve laid out in my life thus far, but that’s not true at all. Life is much more messy and unpredictable than that.

But enough of my rambling!! That time of my life may have been stressful but I’m very grateful that I went through it! It changed how I viewed problems and it taught me to always look for other options when everything seems helpless.

Thank u so much for ur encouragement, I really appreciate it <33 I completely agree with everything u said!! Life is an ever changing experience & often leads u in unpredictable directions!

#ask #ilu isopod #I often look back on those sketches (and more that I just haven’t posted)#I find a kind of beauty in it idk how to explain it #teenage angst is just something we all gotta go thru #ranting #we have options

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novakaiserart · 2 months

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Rebirth Broke Me

i jusr finished rebirth and oh man i fucking love this game, it embellished the relationships between every character to well. worked on the plot so naturally and beautifully. i especially love how much they portrayed aerith and tifa, gave yuffie more of a connection to the group. i also adore how they explored the gi story and made it so much more relevant. i love how they worked out barret's struggles. absolutely in love with vincent, but i always did so lol. i saw some people complaining about cid, but imo i think he's putting up a good guy front just so he doesn't lose any business after his attempt at being a shinra pilot failed. i fully expect them to cover his story in part 3 and explore it more like they did with everyone else. im soooo happy we got to see cissnei, but so sad aerith and her didnt speak of zack :(. it's also cool we got to see some midgarian faces again even after the crew left. the trials had me actually crying, it was stunning. they really cooked

i was very confused with chapter 14 until I reached the end, but it makes sense to me. spoiler warning ahead ofc i believe aerith died. i also believe cloud is incapable of coping with the fact that she's dead, so he sees her still present with them. but i also believe she won't stay dead either, i think she was really there with cloud when they fought sephiroth. her line of "i'll pray to stop the meteor" tells me she'll come back. being a cetra and all, i think she'll find a way to return to the earth through the lifestream

my leading theory for the trajectory of the games currently goes as following; i believe that sephiroth went back in time to when it all started (crisis core time) in the hopes of changing how events played out, my biggest proof of this is his attempt at killing barret in remake and tifa in rebirth. he underestimated them in the og timeline and only took out aerith as he viewed her as the only threat, but he needs the others out the picture too sooner than later. especially tifa. hence why he constantly gaslights cloud about her being a fake or not being trustable; she's the only one that can help him put his mind back together. without her, cloud will always view the world through clouded lenses. but one thing changed about my theory with the whispers now being white and black; aerith followed him to stop him. she sacrificed her memory and recollections of events to make it back. the whispers were sephiroth and aerith's will fighting to keep the timeline intact, but they evolved and split into two factions. i also think aerith's white materia being hollowed out has something to do with that. i think she saw what he was up to from the lifestream (since shes dead in og timeline), sacrificed her memories to stop him once and for all. for a while i thought aerith was the one going back, but it wouldnt make much sense for her to undo what they did just to save herself and zack. it's possible this is an entirely different sephiroth, but i believe it's the one from the og timeline trying to reunite every world possible to make sure he wins everywhere.

it's hard to say for sure whats going on and we're only going to know once part 3 drops, but i know one thing for sure. neither cloud nor sephiroth are relliable narrators and their interpretation cannot be trusted. cloud's mind is still scattered, he's divided between denial and obedience to sephiroth. anything he says cannot be trusted. sephiroth is bad shit insane, he only accepts his view of the world. his vision is the only valid one, therefore what he says cannot be taken as matter of fact.

one final footnote i want to comment on is the "date" aerith and cloud had. yes, im a big cloti and aerti fan. also believe zack is the only right person for aerith, so maybe im coping but idc lol. i think it was all a dream or at least an altered vision of events. i firmly believe aerith still loves zack. she wrote to him for 4 years while he was taking a mako bath, waited for him endlessly day and night. she loved him dearly. but aerith is also one hell of a loyal person. i doubt she would ever be able to brush off zack like that. she also doesn't know if he died in the remake timeline. i think she projected her love for zack onto cloud; to relive the happiness she found with him one last time. she's been holding on to her grief for years, she still thinks about him. he dropped in one day into her life so suddenly and changed it for the better. as did she for him. he vanished the same way she found him. so when another soldier falls into her life the same way, carries the same sword as him, has similar mannerisms, reminds her so much of the man who she fell in love with; can we really blame her for wanting an escape of how much sadness she felt from zack being gone? i also dont believe for a second she used cloud to feel better about herself, i think she just wanted to feel the love he showed her again before she had to pass on. but cloud isn't zack, cloud could never love her the way zack did. aerith grew up without any real friends, no one that accepted her for being her. everyone viewed her as different or weird; but not zack. he was the first person to show her genuine care (besides her mothers). she misses him, as much as she's happy with all her new friends who also accept her for her; she wishes he was there too. i also don't believe that the real cloud has any romantic feelings for aerith. again, he took on the life of zack in his head. he feels drawn to her because of how much zack loved her.

it's really such a tragic story full of nuance and hurt. i noticed that zack and tifa are great parallels; both of them are the only ones truly capable of reaching inwards towards their respective partner. zack understood aerith much better than cloud ever could. tifa can touch cloud in a way no one could. but that doesn't negate the fact that cloud cares for all of them just as much. they all mean a lot to him and he means a lot to them.

also really appreciate how the devs still kept the canonity of tifa and cloud, but also gave the chance to fans of other pairings to be happy with the outcome and choose their path. its always been a divisive thing in the ff7 fandom, so its cool of them to try and make everyone happy

overall, im super excited for part 3 and i think i might recover from this by the time it comes out

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be-steddie-myheart · 1 year

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secret relationship steddie hiding from the party until they slowly find out one by one

~~okay i havent written anything in a while so im sorry if this isnt that good but here ya go!~~

Steve fell for Eddie pretty fast after Vecna was taken care of. After him, Dustin and the girls dragged his bloodied and broken body out of the upside down, Steve started visiting Eddie in the hospital. Not sure what the tight feeling in his chest was, or why he was pleading, begging, for him to wake up and look at Steve. When that day finally came Steve felt like he could kiss Eddie! Eddie was alive, Eddie was going to be okay, Eddie helped defeat Vecna. A few months after Eddie woke up, and him and Steve got closer, he finally did kiss him, and Eddie kissed him back.

It’s nearing the end of the Summer of ‘86 and Steve and Eddie have been in a peaceful, blissful little bubble of secret romance. To the party, they’re just bros being bros, but to themselves in the cover of nightfall or eddies cozy trailer or Steves big empty house theyre boyfriends. Boyfriends. Steve still couldnt wrap his head around it, but knowing that the sweet little kisses peppered all around his face and the strong arms cuddling him from behind were all his to cherish made it absolutely okay that no one suspected a thing. That is until their shared little shitbird child, Dustin, started asking too many questions.

It started off innocent enough, Dustin bursting through the doors of Family Video, “STEVE! I need a ride to the arcade tomorrow, im GOING TO beat Maxs’ high score on dig dug, i can feel it.”

“Sorry bud but i am busy busy tomorrow, I have a shift here, and then I have to take my car to the mechanic, its making an awful clicking sound, and then ive got a doct..”

“Jesus okay, a simple no would have sufficed”

“It really wouldnt have.” Steve said, sarcastically.

Dustins whole face lit up as he said, “thats okay ill just ask Eddie!” before turning heel and running to the door, Steve swearing he saw a cloud of dust following him he went so fast.

“Youre busy too?! What the hell man?! Whats the point of having two older friends with cars if i cant get rides from them?!” Dustin yelled a little too loud in Eddies little trailer.

“Sorry dude, ive gotta help Wayne out around the house, probably gonna take all day and night.” Eddie said with a smile forming on his face. Tomorrow, Steve had told Eddie to keep the whole entire 24 hours free, as he planned something cheesy, romantic and that would probably make Eddies heart swell a million times bigger.

“Ugh! whatever ill just ride my bike!” Dustin exclaimed.

“Its good to exercise!” Eddie called out the door as Dustin stomped off.

Mike and Dustin were sitting in the basement at Mikes house complaining about having no ride to the arcade the next day.

“Have you noticed how Steve and Eddie are always busy at the same time lately? Do you think theyre hanging out together without us?” Mike asks.

“Yeah you know, now that you say something it does seem like that. They didnt even know each other before us! You’d think they would be more grateful!” Dustin exclaims.

“Eddie, baby, come on in.” Steve smiles as he opens the door to his house. Once Eddie is inside it doesnt feel so empty. So cold.

“So what do you have planned for us, sweetheart?” Eddie asks, voice low, clearly excited to get the plans in action.

“Well i figured we could do some barbecuing together, skinny dip in the pool, watch the sunset and then lay under the stars,” Steve takes Eddies hand and leads him into the living room to the couch, “but right now i just really need to kiss you.” Steve spins Eddie around and gently pushes him onto the couch before crawling into his lap and planting his knees firmly on either side of Eddies waist. Steves arms drape over Eddies shoulder as their lips connect. Steve flicks his tongue out trace Eddies pouty bottom lip and Eddie opens his mouth to let Steve in. The kiss is passionate and hot and heavy and pretty soon both boys are frantically tearing at each others clothes. They try to get Steves shorts off without him having to give up his seat on Eddies lap and bump heads, giggling, as they get back into exploring each others mouths like its the first time again.

“I knew Eddie was going to be here! I knew they were hanging out without us, those jerks.” Dustin says as he hops off his bike and lets it fall into Steves front yard, Mike coming up right behind him. “Im catching them in the act of having fun without us.” He said smugly as he bursts through the front door. “Aha! Assho- OH MY GOD!”

Steve startles and jumps off of eddies lap, hiding himself behind the couch while Eddie grabs a pillow and covers his lap.

“What the actual fuck Henderson?!” Eddie exclaims. Mike walks in at that moment.

“Oh dude were you guys kissing?! Gross youre like my parents.” He said with a disgusted groan.

“Are you guys dating?” Dustin asks at the same time.

Steve holds his finger towards the boys, “First of all, its not gross because we literally are not your parents and second of all,” he looks down at Eddie, who is already looking up at him, giving him the go ahead with his eyes, “yes we are dating. But please dont tell anyone else, its still kinda new and we dont want a bunch of people knowing.”

Steve makes Dustin and Mike pinky swear they wont tell anyone what they saw. They also get a ride to the arcade by a grumpy Steve Harrington and a giggly Eddie Munson.

Two days later, at Eddies trailer, Steve is preparing breakfast for the two after a lovely night spent together.

“Kiss the chef, eh? Dont mind if i do.” Eddie giggles and gives Steve a chaste little kiss on the lips, “smells delicious sweetheart, I cant wait to eat.”

Steve smiles at the compliment and now he cant wait for Eddie to try what hes making.

The bext trailer over, El rips the blindfold down from her eyes as they almost bulge out of her skull.

“What?! Was Steve with a girl?!” Max asks frantically, the makeshift spin board with everyones names on it between them.

“No, Steve is at Eddies house and he is kissing him and making him breakfast” El says with a hint of surprise in her voice.

“No way.” Max gets up and goes to leave her trailer with El following closely behind her. They dont even knock on Eddies door, they just slam it open as Steve and Eddie jump apart from each other.

“What the hell is up with you twerps and not fucking knocking on doors?!” Steve yells.

“El saw you guys kissing so we had to come over and see if if it was really happening. Gross by the way.” Max said.

“Maybe dont spy on people if you dont want to be grossed out” Eddie laughed.

Lucas and Will found out the next day because Lucas wanted to get some basketball tips from Steve and Will tagged along because, come on, its Steve Harrington, who doesnt wanna look at that. After the boys apologized for the precarious situation they were found in, Will stayed behind after Lucas started to leave.

“Im really happy for you guys” Will spoke softly.

Eddie ruffles his hair, “thanks baby Byers, anytime you wanna talk you know you can come to us” Will thanked him and left before Lucas got curious as to why he wasnt following.

Robin and Nancy walked in on a hot and heavy makeout sesh at a party at the Hoppers-Byers household.

“Im surprised but im happy for you guys! you seem to fit well together” Nancy smiled after the inital awkwardness was over. She looked expectedly at Robin.

“Oh yeah i totally did not, didnt know you guys were together. What a complete shock but im- im happy for you” Robin spit out quick, knowing she was the only one who knew because she helped Steve through his bi-panic when we he realized he wanted to kiss Eddie.

At that same party, Steve and Eddie were interrupted again by a very high Argyle and Jonathon.

“You guys are cute. Know where we can go make-out?” Argyle asked while Jonathon blushed.

#steddie #steddie ficlet #steve x eddie #eddie munson #steve harrington

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ourflagmeansgayrights · 1 year

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i'm cry laughing some people on twitter are now saying "izzy bashing" needs to be tagged in fics. how did these people ever survive watching this show where izzy is the CANON ANTAGONIST i'll never know

benefit of the doubt but i think most of them have gotten to this point gradually. when they first watched the show they were not attached to izzy the way they are now. i know for a lot of people it was blorbo at first sight with izzy but i've also seen izzy enjoyers say they didn't like him at first, and then fandom made them care about him.

like i'm pretty sure for a lot of ppl it started off with isolating themselves from ppl who made posts that they didnt like, like ppl who criticized ofmd for being based on two real people with direct connections to actual real-world slave trade (which is an incredibly valid thing to criticize abt ofmd).

another one that i think funneled a lot of fans towards being so delusionally attached to izzy was people pointing out or complaining about the disproportionate amount of fan content for izzy compared to prominent characters of color—which is a consistent issue in fandom no matter what the media, and is also a very easy one for people to be uncomfortable with whenever they see it get pointed out. people venting that "fans care too much abt this white man" often make fans who care abt that white man very defensive right off the bat, and then rather than engage with why they feel defensive or question if maybe their enjoyment of this character is fueled by implicit bias (which it might not be, to be clear! im not saying—and i have never said—that everyone who enjoyes izzy likes him for racist reasons), they stop listening to the conversation abt white favoritism and continue blorboposting as much as they want. it's incredibly easy for fans to brush off this convo as "just starting drama" and avoid the topic altogether because "fandom is for fun!" and they dont want to think abt difficult topics like racism and implicit bias, they just want to enjoy their blorbos in peace.

so they kept narrowing the takes they were seeing until they were in an echo chamber that kept moving more and more towards complete woobification of izzy hands. these people are now looking at the show entirely through izzy's pov, making posts abt how sad it is that none of the other characters are ever nice to him, how frustrating the show is from his perspective, how it feels to be deeply in love with someone who doesn't love you back. they've stared at gifs of con's micro-expressions and read angsty fanfiction and looked at endless izzy fanart and their entire ofmd fandom experience revolves around empathizing with this one character even tho the show itself continually makes him the butt of the joke.

at this point, telling these people to rewatch the show doesn't even matter. they've spent so much time over-analyzing every single one of izzy's scenes to the point where the emotional responses they get from these scenes are not the emotional responses anyone would have watching the show for the first time. they've warped the entire first season to fit their version of the show and are forgetting how often the show itself bashes izzy.

and the icing on the cake is the trolling. there's like, one or two people on here who go around sending anon hate and leaving nasty comments on instagram posts and harassing people on twitter for... like, i would say "for liking izzy" or even "for saying positive things about izzy" but like. i've gotten these messages, and the most sympathetic i've ever been to izzy was the post i made like "maybe he's mean bc he has chronic IBS. i'd actually understand him more if that were the case." so when i get these messages it's easier for me to just laugh them off bc it's so obviously just someone trying to make me upset, but people who do care about izzy (a lot of them being the same people who avoided engaging with the "why does fandom care so much abt white characters" convo) get these absolutely horrible messages about how they deserve to get hate crimed and they should kill themselves. and these fans who didn't want to even see vaguely negative posts abt izzy bc they just want to enjoy fandom in peace are now like "im targeted for just liking a character!"

so that's how we get to people saying that "izzy bashing" needs to be tagged. never mind that their definition of "bashing" almost certainly includes things that are not bashing but are just things that contradict the way they headcannnon him.

#ask #anon #mine #txt #og #izzy critical #izzy hands #ofmd fandom crit #if this post is in the izcourse tag no it isnt u just dont know how to use tumblr #obligatory Not All Izzy Fans disclaimer #also btw in case anyone tries to come at me with “it's stupid to tell people to pay attention to different characters”:#noticing the disappointing trend of fandom to fixate on white side characters ≠ telling people to stop making izzy content #im not telling individual izzy hands enjoyers to stop paying attention to izzy. there are a lot of reasons why ppl might like izzy #if i interact w someone whose ofmd contribution is primarily pro-izzy my thought is “oh they like antagonists��#not “oh they don't care about characters of color bc they're racist” ok im not gonna jump there without a reason #but on a fandom-wide scale this is a Trend that has happened over and over again in fandom after fandom after fandom #like We Live In A Society bro we can't just pretend white men are always the faves in fandoms just by coincidence #but also tbh if you think im saying that You Personally need to make content for characters of color? and you're getting MAD at me for it??#then ur probs not someone i want making content for those characters lmao. u keep izzyposting to ur heart's content <3 have fun bestie

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stellaris-archivum · 5 months

Text

a vampire x vampire hunter au with my valorant oc because my brain is rotting over this idea for the longest time

notes:

self insert, original female character

hunter! oc x vampire! chamber

amihan is 32 years old, vincent (chamber) is about a century old

not beta read

a tentative idea, but it could be changed later on. it's 1am, im tired, but i really want to write this down because it has been CONSUMING ME

possible (very briefly mentioned) vampire hunter lore here that will be explored if i do write it down as a series

amihan can be y/n?????

"A pleasant surprise, good to see you made it in time, chèrie." An impish grin greeted her upon her arrival, his gelled, swept-back hair glistened in the moonlight. "I have been waiting for you."

There's the grin she always loathed, the smooth, suavely voice that she always grinded her gears. For the countless encounters they've had, it almost became a routine. For the hunter and solar sorcerer Amihan Mendoza to find one of the most powerful vampires in Quebec in this specific spot is no lucky chance—their connection was of uncanny circumstances. Fighting through patterns, through repetition, they just found themselves within the vicinity of one another; every other night without fail. Amihan stood within the trees, leaves, tree bark and stems underneath her feet. She scoffed, "You know I wouldn't miss the chance to finally killing you, Vincent."

"Vincent? Please, no need for such formalities." His sharp fangs poked out just enough for her to see as he grinned, standing tall atop a red maple tree. Amihan has always found it odd—no, weird to see the vampire in such a... convoluted type of clothing. It is the 21st century, people wore casual clothing and not, well, whatever Victorian era corpse he stole his outfit from. A lot of the vampires that she had hunted and killed lately were dressed within the century in order to blend in with the crowd but for some reason, Vincent the Vampire simply refused to get with the times. She couldn't really say if it was worse or not, but she absolutely disliked the fact that it actually suited him. Like actually looked good on him. For a vampire as old as he was, Amihan could never imagine anything else in his person other than expensive garments and frilly shirts. "Mon chou, it is rude to stare."

"I'll stare whenever I damn want and however long," she spat, folding her arms unamused. "And how do you want this to start, hm? I believe it's about time you make the first move."

"Dear god, mon chasseur," he snorted, "I am your prey! Do you truly expect that I will make the first move? I may be a savage, yes, but I am also a gentleman. Ladies' first."

"A gentleman or a coward?" Her sharp eyes stared up at him with the same old scowl. Was it growing deeper with the distaste she had for him? Maybe, but she was definitely curious to see if she could get him to move first. "I don't see why you shouldn't make the first move—this is a one-time offer, buddy. I reckon don't waste it."

"Is that a taunt? How cute."

"I'm just saying that if you don't move through your entire character then maybe you're not a true gentleman after all." The hunter shrugs rather dismissively. "Ladies' first, sure. But don't you think it's quite rude to have the woman do all the work? I believe for the 5 months I've hunted your elusive ass, I have done most of the initiating. It's about damn time you do so now, don't you think?" Amihan kept her dull, brown eyes on him. She wanted him to get annoyed, slighted. Out of all the vampires he had hunted, he seems to be the most elusive, most intelligent, and the most eerily humane. Upon observation during their past encounters, this vampire seems to be the only one who was thinking rationally. It wouldn't be too bad to try and take that away from him, right? Startle, confuse, overcome—that was the way to go. Would she win against him this time?

The vampire seemed to think about what she had said though, and he seemed to be a little conflicted. She definitely got him there where she wanted him. There was a stir in his mind, he couldn't care less who initiates and who doesn't; he was just trying to survive! Well, there were a lot of similar individuals in a similar situation as he, but they weren't as fortunate as he was (he did think they were imbeciles for being caught and killed like that and like before, that was not his problem). His only concern was to survive, nothing more, but for the past 5 months he did find the hunter's unrelenting resolve as something that was fascinating. As he was quite the annoying vampire to hunt and as well as the most rational, most hunters have died in the belief that he was like his feral brethren—moving solely to quench their thirst for life. Other hunters had escaped, other hunters found him difficult to contain and had given up trying.

But not Amihan.

Every other day without fail? It was only something Amihan could do. The way that she was the only one to have ever figured out his routine and had been continually meeting him here in this exact same spot, it had caught his attention and interest. His curiosity could only grow and eat him in sorry frustration as she would most likely kill him if he ever came close. What would her blood taste like, how would his skin glide to the shape of her nape? Just the mere thought of it made his mouth water but he was immediately dragged away by her voice, taunting, telling him to come closer...

"Come on," Amihan said in boredom, "Move."

For a second, his rationality slipped at the most crucial moment, finding himself right in front of her, nose touching, breaths mingling—the wind howled coldly through the trees and forests of Quebec as the space between them became occupied in a matter of seconds. His eyes were locked in one spot on her body. The nape—his mouth started to water again, his teeth felt itchy, painfully trying and wanting to sink into her flesh, slowly consumed by the thought of it.

Bite. Drink, drink, drink, drink, drink—

The hunter's victorious grin was such an eerie sight that was immediately forgotten by the sudden, overwhelming pain that flared up his body.

"Dimwit," she said, grinning from ear to ear. "I've finally caught you."

#i just need to get this out of my system good GOD this had me on a chokehold #stellaris snippet #valorant chamber #vincent fabron #chamber valorant #valorant x reader #valorant x oc #valorant x you #vampire #vampire au #fanfiction #valorant fanfiction

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kyouka-supremacy · 11 months

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TGP BSD AU DETAILS PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE I NEED TO BE FED. WAIT. DOES THAT MAKE ATSUSHI CHIDI??????? IM GOING FERAL PLEASE WHAT HAVE YLU DONE

Omg here we go

Akutagawa as Eleanor. Obvs. That Beast flavor of protagonist vibes. Unapologetical Yokohama scumbag. Used to work for the Yakuza before he died.

Atsushi as Chidi. Used to be a literature university professor. He's perfect fit to fill Chidi's anxious shoes.

This time most of the comic relief is born from having a literal mobster, for whom homicide has always been the first solution to problems, being dropped in paradise, where everyone is already dead so he can't kill. Ft. the very very stressed Atsushi, nothing more than an academic nerd who's trying /so hard/ to stop him from breaking havoc.

“Do all soulmates come with complimentary haircuts or?”

A looooot of initial conflict and Akutagawa and Atsushi fighting, even more than cheleanor, you can guess it. Yet Atsushi does never step back from offering his help to Akutagawa.

Akutagawa who struggles to even ASK for help. Atsushi is 100% done and spends half the time saying “why am I even doing this” and yet he does keep doing this.

Atsushi teaching Akutagawa to be a better person through literature more than philosophy. Them reading books together and learning that there's beauty in the concept of all humans being inherently connected through time and space by feeling the same things (cue to “we're all in this together”).

*Minor inconvenience occurs* “I say we kill them” “No, I– what?? We– you do realize we're in the afterlife, right? You do realize you can't kill people here, right?”

Please imagine Atsushi as a classical literature professor with glasses and turtlenecks and a stack of books always in his hands it's very important to me

“You know what, for someone who barely knew how to read when we first met, you speak with a surprisingly elaborate vocabulary”

Where Eleanor's struggle is constantly being triggered by people being better than her, for Akutagawa it comes more in the form of being constantly reminded that he was never good enough

When it comes to Atsushi... It's a mess. For the most part of the story, you'd see him and think he's nothing but a professor. Yet gradually, slowly, start to appear hints that something is off with him. In reality, he's absolutely tormented, he's just used to not make it transpire. Differently from Chidi, he does, very early on, start questioning if he belongs there in the Good Place– but tries again and again to convince himself that he does belong there, that he's good. That's all he's ever tried to be, that's all he's ever done, why wouldn't he? And yet it constantly feels like he's just lying to himself, but he does want to lie, he wants to believe he's good. He's tried so hard all his life to be good– and now his struggles are paying off! They are, right? So it doesn't matter if he killed that man when he was a child. He's a good person. He's spent his whole life trying to make amends for it. He's good he's good he's good (grows increasingly insane)

Aka, Atsushi killed Shibusawa when he was little. The orphanage director covered it up and nobody came to know, but the truth haunted Atsushi his whole life, and now keeps haunting him in the afterlife too, because deep down he knows he doesn't belong. Aka Atsushi going through the horrors™ once again.

So Atsushi's helping Akutagawa isn't, at least initially, moved by altruism like Chidi's (Atsushi is a pretty selfish character...), but by his desperate need to prove he's good + a sort of auto-inflicted punishment. He's fucked up...

On the hand of Akutagawa's backstory– you know when Eleanor's background is revealed, and you're like “that doesn't justify her being a shitty person, but at least I understand now?”; for Akutagawa it would be revealing he joined the Yakuza in the first place to provide for his little sister. I can see him revealing it to Atsushi after having spent a long long time together and having eventually warmed up to each other (and having fallen in love), on a particularly vulnerable night: Akutagawa tells him that although there's nothing from his life of hell on earth he could ever miss, he worries about how his little sister is doing without him; to Atsushi's genuine astonishment, because in months of knowing each other Akutagawa had never brought up having a sister.

Akutagawa's character core is once again finding the reason to his existence– or better, finding the answer. (That's taking from Chidi's character this time)

“You know the reason yourself, don't you” would be Akutagawa's “There is no answer // but Atsushi is the answer”. This au basically writes itself

Dazai as Michael... You know why

Further sskk tgp au ramblings (1) (2)

#I have no clue who to make Tahani and Jason tbh. I've been thinking about it for a year now and I really can't come up with anything #I feel like Ranpo could be a good Tahani but that's it #I guess it just doesn't fit in the bigger picture? Maybe it's better to leave it at sskk and Dazai.#Omg no wait what if Lucy is Tahani... And Atsushi is kinda attracted to her like Eleanor is to Tahani... Would that work #atsushi nakajima #ryūnosuke akutagawa #sskk #shin soukoku #bsd #bungou stray dogs #mine #bsd tgp au #people asks me stuff #Thank youuuuuu for this ask I love this au #I could never make a t/pn tgp au because the t/pn characters are just... Good people. Nobody would fit for Eleanor #And that kind of sucked but luckily for me bsd is full of shitty people

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valen-3o · 3 months

Text

My thoughts on the whole Palestinen genocide.

Because i feel like I haven't talked about it enough

C.W. war, genocides, religious beliefs

I think it needs to be said. Its sickening when people (social media influencers e.c.t.) decided to use war as a profit to them creating content. For example, Palestine's genocide. Tiktok is a platform where people would do anything for views. Around mid October, Palestine was getting the attention it needed with everything going on. And now in February, the comparison to December is crazy. I'd say I'd get 1 video every 2 weeks talking about Palestine and what is happening. But it is nice to see some platforms (tumblr as an example) to never take a minute to stop talking abt Palestine. Because you shouldn't, and it goes for other wars and genocides. What's happening to Palestines social media status is what happened to Ukraine.

The ukraine war is still going on, but its rarely recognised anymore. People using wars and genocides like that as a trend is honestly sickening, its obvious thats what happened on tiktok with Palestine. And whether your talking abt one war to another. Never compare it. Obviously, some may be going through worse then others. But that doesn't mean the situation still isn't classified as good, as im sure no one wants to go through anything like war and genocides. If a video is about another war complete different to another, don't start comparing - both are just as bad.

I've seen some Ukraine posts going up, but yet all the comments are filled abt Palestine. Yes, Palestine should be free. But that specific post was talking abt a situation different to Palestine, and a whole different country. I agree that Palestine should be free no matter what. Yet, that doesn't make it okay to make other wars all about it.

I belive what Israel is doing is wrong and there is absolutely no justification to what they're are doing is right. Images show similarities to Nazi Germany compared to Israel. I do think some people would be pressured into thinking and believing what they are doing is right - due to religious reasoning.

It's important to recognize that not all Jewish people support Israel's actions towards Palestine, just as not all individuals of any group share the same views. The relationship between Jewish identity and support for Israel can be complex and varies widely among individuals. While some Jewish people may feel a strong connection to Israel and support its actions, others may critique or oppose certain policies or actions of the Israeli government. Yet that is not an excuse.

My final point, rishi sunak is an absolute cunt for his actions. Trying to stop protest and speaking abt Palestine is stupid. It just goes to show how he doesn't have control of the UK and needs to get a grip. It's sucks that he decides to support israel of all things.

In the end, what Israel is doing is bad. End of. Palestine deserves to be free no matter what. That's why do all you can to stop - protest, boycott, never stop talking about Palestine.

This is my opinion, what I say you do not have to agree with me. I might've said a few things not how i ment it as it doesnt come across well in text. However, if you support Israel and zionism, get off my blog.

#free palestine 🇵🇸#from the river to the sea palestine will be free #free gaza 🇵🇸#free palestine #genocide #my opinion

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