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wheresmymilliondollarman · 1 year

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reader x xander Hawthorne please 🥺

xander hawthorne x fem!reader

hcs about meeting & dating xander hawthorne

a/n: HI IM BACK! & tysm for the request!! xander is so underrated 👎 thats my bae fr🫶 currently working on other stuff but wanted to do this request bc i immediately had ideas for this!! i still don't completely get how school worked in the books, so if there's any wrong info please bare w me. if this wasn't what you had in mind feel free to send a specific request! again, this is kinda fic like but still calling it hcs.

word count: 7.3k

warnings: long backstory again, mentions of death, sexual themes. (pls lmk if you see anything else that should be labeled as a warning)

you’ve always lived on the middle side class of things. you were, thankfully, never poor, but also never rich enough where you could afford the more luxurious things in life.

your mother owned a small bakery 3 blocks away from your home, while your father worked for an electrician company. both jobs were stable enough to provide for necessities and both your parents enjoyed their occupations.

your parents always told you to never worry about money, but it still made you reluctant to ask them for things you wanted in fear they couldn't afford it. which is why you always tried to fix your problems yourself.

if you ever needed money, you would work for your mother at her bakery in exchange. while it was still your mom giving you the money, it made you feel better that you earned the cash.

you later found yourself working at the bakery even without needing money. you liked working with your mom, and it was fun to learn how to make different types of sweets.

at school, you were always a studious person. you worked hard to get a's and never anything below. you wanted to make your parents proud and feel as if their hard work toward the family wasn't for nothing.

you knew it would be practically impossible for your family to afford your college career without going into debt. so you always looked at scholarships and what they looked for in students, so you tried to make yourself appear well-rounded.

you joined student council, mathletes (although math wasn't your forte),library club, chess club,art club, film club, yearbook, culinary club, asl club, and a few others over the years. to say your schedule after school was always booked was a major understatement.

although your favorite was always the art club. you never even knew you had an artistic side until you joined. you explored it more with your membership and soon became quite good.

during your freshman year you took your first art class. you were excited to learn under a professional for the first time.

after a few lessons, your first major assignment was realism project; draw somebody in your everyday life.

you were both excited and a bit nervous. you had drawn people before, but never someone you knew, and you wanted to make a great first impression on your teacher.

you ended up choosing your mother as your muse; your father could never stay still enough to be drawn. it took a lot of long nights when your mother wasn't working to finish your drawing. you could've just taken a photo of her and drawn that, but you pushed for the extra mile of drawing her from real life.

you were satisfied when you finished, and your parents were in awe by your work - telling you over and over how talented you were and your teacher would surely be impressed. still, you were anxious about turning it in the next day in class.

your assignment was a big hit with your teacher, you got a perfect A+. she commented on your beautiful handiwork, noting that your drew from real life. she also advised how you should consider switching to an advanced class since it was obvious you were already beyond a beginner course.

you wanted to decline at first, being intimidated by the thought of being in a class with others who were just as good or better than you - but your gut instinct told you it was the right choice to make.

it proved to be right because by the spring you were already one of the best in your art class. you expanded into all types of art: abstract, realism, expressionism, digital, etc. your favorite and most notable works tended to be the realistic ones of people, place, and objects. art had become a part of your life in the best way.

you entered a numerous amount of competitions and always come back on top; it got to the paint your shelfs had all been filled to the brim. you parents of course were elated with your success and were never prouder.

you soon were able to make some money with your art skills as well. you got commissioned for mainly portraits of family and friends, mostly to give as gifts or to have in their household. it made you feel proud someone out there had a piece of your art and that people loved your work enough to want you to paint their family.

the biggest commission you've ever taken was a 40x30 portrait of an older man. the request was anonymous, so you weren't sure who the man was or if the request was for himself or another person.

the project took a few weeks due to your work load and having to paint such fine details on a huge canvas. you were happy with the outcome and were astonished to find out the anonymous buyer had given you 10k for your work. it was way over your normal pay grade.

your success didn't end there. in the summer before your sophomore year, you received a fancy envelope in the mail. it was addressed to you and sent from heights country day school.

at first, you were confused as to why they would send you anything. everyone in texas knew of heights country day, it was one of the best private schools in the state. almost all parents want their kids to be a student there, but the tuition was awfully expensive, so if you weren't rich you were most likely not getting in.

you didn't wait to tell your parents before your ripped open the envelop in anticipation. you unfolded the letter inside and skimmed over the introductions.

you were shocked to find out you were being awarded a full paid scholarship to attend heights country day school for the rest of highschool.

your first thought was to assume it was a prank, or a scammer trying to get your info. but you examined the letter further; the seal of the school and the dean signature did look quite authentic. then you noticed the number listed on the bottom of the page.

you figured you should just call and check for confirmation. you told yourself the worst case scenario would be they laugh at your face and tell you the letter isn't real.

you definitely did not want to inform your parents until you made the call, that way if it wasn't real, their hopes wouldn't be crushed and they would never even know about it.

it took an hour of pacing in your room to finally work up the courage to make the call. you kept tour expectations low to avoid disappointment.

the secretary of the school was quick to pick up after two rings, and you briefly explained the letter you received. you held your breath for a second until she told you to "please hold for a moment."

when she returned she informed you you were being transferred to the dean's phone. your nerves were through the roof at this point. you wanted to believe it was a good sign the dean wanted to talk to you, but maybe he wanted to tell you himself the letter was unfortunately a phony and they do not give scholarships to art students.

the dean finally picked up the call and you both exchanged greetings. from there he explained how the letter was, in fact, very real.

the school had seen a work of yours and dug deeper into your portfolio and academic career. they were very impressed with your achievement, especially given your age. the board was all unanimous in agreeing to offer you the scholarship because of your artistic talents and would love for you to become a part of their school.

the rest of the call was a blur to you. when the call ended you stood stunned in your room for a minute. you had to pinch yourself to remind yourself this was real and happening.

once you snapped out of it, you were jumping up and down in joy. you truly were elated to possibly be a student at one of the top private schools in texas or even the country.

you wasted no more time informing your parents when they arrived home. they also thought you were just pulling their leg, but after you told them you had confirmation - you swear their jaws hit the floor.

your parents were just as excited for you. your mother took the liberty of baking all your favorites in celebration, even lemon scones, which were your favorite.

before you knew it, summer was over, and it was time to get back into school. you spent the rest of your break prepping to attend heights - gathering books, supplies, and a uniform (which was mostly paid by the school).

this was your first time wearing a uniform, and you were a bit delighted to wear it. it was a burgundy blazer with a navy crest embossed, with the school motto in latin, a white dress shirt, and a pleated plaid skirt.

it screamed, "i go to a really expensive private school."

it was nerve-wracking that you were now going to school with some of the richest and elite children in america. you'd hope it wouldn't be obvious where your social class stood, or if it was, they wouldn't think of you any less for it.

you did your best to stray from stereotypical assumptions, but then again you've never interacted with people of a such higher social class - you really had no idea what to expect.

nonetheless, you wanted to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, so you held your head up high when the first day came around.

the school in no way looked like a regular public school, it shared way more similar qualities with college campuses. it was beautifully constructed, and you had a feeling the inside was even more stunning.

your parents dropped you off in front of the twin archways of the school, wishing you a good first day, and they were only a call away if you needed anything. you responded with your goodbyes and now stood on the pavement of heights day.

a part of you was glad your parents left so soon; you loved them to death, but their older modeled car stood out amongst the other deluxe cars parked and driving into school grounds. the last thing you wanted on your first day was to stick out like a sore thumb.

you took a deep breath before you took your strides through the front door.

you were happy to see no one gave you obvious looks and stares when you walked through, like those of a movie. everyone seemed preoccupied with their own things. you were silently thankful for that.

you made your way to the office on your own; luckily it was very near the front entrance with a big sign that said 'office of registrar'. making it very easy for you to find it without having to awkwardly ask another peer.

you walked to a desk of who you assumed was a secretary and gave her your name and stated your business. she instantly recognized your name and made a swift move to hand you your schedule.

the secretary informed you about the school's modular scheduling, which means they operate on a six-day cycle, and classes meet anywhere from three to five times a cycle. you were free to fit in lunch where you saw fit. you honestly didn't quite grasp it, but you figured you'd just learn along the way.

she also let you know another student had been assigned to show you around school. that's how you ended up meeting rebecca laughlin.

rebecca was a shy and a bit nervous girl, but seemed sweet nonetheless. you briefly got to know her as she showed you the different rooms; the archive room, the reflector (basically the cafeteria you realized), gym, the art center etc.

she was in the same grade as you, and had a twin sister named emily also in the school. from the small mention of her sister you sensed it was likely a sore subject. you took over from there talking a bit about yourself and your interests.

rebecca mentioned she was also new this year, having moved to texas just recently with her family but frequently visiting before that. she was able to go on a private tour with her sister over the summer, which is why she knew the place quite well already.

you two chatted a bit more until the tour ended. the last stop was the art center, and you were more than thrilled to go inside and check it out. rebecca was about to enter along with you before she saw her twin sister and people who you assume were her friends , a boy and a girl.

you turned around to glance at them and saw they were waving her over. you could tell rebecca was hesitant to just leave you for them, but you reassured her she provided an excellent tour. she reluctantly went off toward her friends, not before giving you her number and letting you know if you had any questions you could reach her.

you took a peak back at where rebecca and her friends were walking away. they all look straight out of a teen vogue catalog. emily was identical to rebecca, same red hair, eyes, and face. you could tell emily was more confident than rebecca however. there was another girl, dark eyes and even darker brown wavy hair - she was so beautiful it felt unreal. and lastly with them was a boy, he was quite tall, dark-skinned with light honey brown eyes, and a head full of curly hair. he was handsome and easily fit in with the rest of the model-looking girls.

you must've looked a second too long because he turned his head in your direction and you both made eye contact.

you quickly snapped your head away,not waiting for his reaction, and made your way to the arts center. you cursed yourself for being caught looking a bit, and now you were slightly embarrassed.

when you reached the arts center, you were amazed. it was a big building with different rooms, it was decorated as if was a museum, marble floors and pillars, archways, etc. and everything about it was engaging.

you took the time to explore the whole place; you found several different art rooms you assumed were open to students, different supply closest, classrooms for teaching, and even a few soundproof rooms. at some point you ran into a few teachers and got to know them and what they taught. you had a few of them in your schedule, so it was great to know where their classes were.

before you knew it, it was time for your first class and then eventually to your last of the day. for lunch you had opted to eat what you brought from home in the archive because you didn't feel like going through the anxiety of finding somewhere alone to sit in the refectory.

it ended up being ironic because you made a friend in there who was also eating lunch. you were sitting alone at small table when a blonde haired girl with her lunch approached you.

her name was mia, and you both instantly clicked. mia had noticed you eating at the table alone and thought she'd introduce herself since she hadn't since you on campus before. she was also a sophomore, seventeen, and she was part of height country day dance team.

she has almost always eaten in the archive since her freshman year; she enjoyed the quiet and privacy since few students ever ate or hung out there too long - you both had that in common.

after that great first meeting, the two of you became best friends. you would occasionally have a class or two with her depending on the schedule, but you both always made time to see each other throughout the day and eat lunch in the archive room.

she later on introduced you to a few of her other friends, that were now your friends as well. they were all pretty wealthy, but it didn't change the fact they were all genuine and friendly people. the fear of making friends at your new school was gone by the end of your first week.

that's set up the rest of your fantastic first year at heights country day school.

you fit in immediately with the art center and other art peers. you all carried the same passions, and it was very fun to learn from others. of course, you all intimidated to be around people so advanced and mostly rich, but it only pushed you to work even harder.

your teachers were all so great. they were also tough critiques, being professionals and all, but you took any critique you got with stride- making you a better artist.

your non-art-related classes were more difficult and work-loaded than you were use to, but you were quick to catch up with the rest of the class.

a few kids at school were stuck up and pretentious, but mostly the students weren't too far off from normal teenagers. and like high school there were cliques and popular people. you never bothered yourself with any of that, yet you always heard three reoccurring last names - hawthorne, laughlin, and calligaris.

you knew laughlin meant rebecca and emily, and it didn't take you long to figure out the other last names must belong to the other two people she was with during your first day. it made sense to you they were well-known, just their looks alone made you feel like they're superior to you.

you could've asked mia or literally paid attention to gossip around you if you wanted to know the first names of the boy & girl with the laughlins, but it honestly slipped your mind. frankly, you were too occupied with navigating your new school life to really care too much about it.

the most shocking event to happen that year was the dead of emily laughlin.

you weren't close friends with rebecca - you two did have a few chats and texts here and there; she once or twice joined mia and you in the archive. but you still felt horrible her sister died and felt the need to reach out.

you gave her your condolences when you saw her back at school, and let her know you were there for anything. she thanked you, but you could tell she needed space to grieve.

you still felt the need to do something, so you came up with the idea to make her a portrait and gifted it to her wrapped. you didn't see her reaction to it (she opened it when she got home), but she let you know she deeply appreciated it.

after that the rest of your year was quick to come and go. and before you knew it, it was summer again.

your summer stayed uneventful, but fun. you worked almost full-time with your mom in her bakery and spent time with your friends.

one afternoon, you were working the counter and you saw a familiar face walk in - a certain handsome, honey-eyed, curly-haired guy.

you greeted him as you normally did customers and asked for his order. he replied, asking for blueberry scones.

you nodded and went to get the scones from your display. that's when he spoke up again, commenting on how he'd seen you from school.

you were taken aback he’d remembered you but you nodded agreeing and replied you were new sophomore year.

"what happens to be your name, baker girl?"

"y/n. and what happens to be yours, new customer?"

he gave a dramatic offended look, hand over his heart - "you mean your telling me you don't know the name of the most dashing man at heights country day school?"

you shrugged, "i suppose not."

"when then i ought to fix that, the name is xander, milady," bowing down to give a kiss on the dorsal side of your hand.

oh he was charming alright.

to hide your blushing face you busied yourself with packing his scones into a paper bag and rang him up to the register.

"very serious question...how do you feel about blueberry scones?"

"they're good, but i think the lemon ones are better."

you've never seen someone look so taken aback as xander did in that moment. he looked as if he'd just got the news his favorite boy band broke up.

"are you alright-"

"what do you mean you prefer the lemon ones!"

xander then went into a tagent on blueberry scones stomp the lemon ones any day, and only psychos favored the lemons. you countered his claims, defending your favorite treat. you both were going back and forth until a bell rang throughout the bakery, signaling a customer has entered.

"i suppose that's my sign to take my leave, but trust this debate is not over."

you rolled your eyes playfully, but you fought back a smile at the implication you two would speak again.

he handed his black card to pay, and you tried not to look astonished at his casual display of the card. as you were swiping his card, he pulled a scone out of his brown bag and laid it on the counter in front of you.

"here, it's my treat. this is the start of my fool-proof plan to convince you blueberry scones are far more superior."

you tried to decline or offer him a refund for that scone, but ever the gentleman, he wouldn't allow it. he was out the door before you could protest anymore. leaving with a, "until we meet again," and a wink.

you hated yourself for liking his annoying handsome beautiful smirk.

as he requested, you did eat the scone. you admit blueberry is delicious, but nothing compared to the citrus of your lemon ones. plus, you found a new motivation to keep favoring them.

that was the first of xander's many visits to the bakery that summer. always the same order, and always leaving one for you to eat. he really was on a mission to change your mind.

sometimes out of spite you'd slip in a lemon scone into his bag to rile him up when he opened it. it always resulted in xander coming back the next day throwing a dramatic hissy fit. you kinda found it cute.

you two continued your light banter about scones, but ventured into different topics such as school, hobbies, and exploding robots (his favorite topic). even as you worked behind the counter aiding customers, he was there talking your ear off. not that you minded at all, it was nice to have someone other than your mom to talk to.

you found out xander was very smart; he builds replicas of star wars droids and was a three-time world champion at building machines. you'd never known someone with such intellect. whenever you brought it up, however, he'd brush it off saying it's a family thing and his brothers are much wiser.

you briefly got a synopsis of his family, and it was quite intriguing. he had four half-brother; nash, grayson, and jameson - all sharing the same mother, but none of the boys' fathers seemed to be in the picture. all of them were basically raised by their grandfather, tobias hawthorne, who was obsessed with riddles and games. he sounded like an interesting man to say the least.

you opened up to him a bit about your family and getting a scholarship into the school. which now looked not as impressive talking to a genius yet, xander was amazed at this, asking to see some of your work.

you were suddenly self-conscious about your art. you thought a rich guy like himself probably had seen hundreds of artworks better than yours and done by people younger than your age.

so, you lied and said you didn't have any pictures, and that you'll show him another time. you're gonna stall that as much as possible.

you guys later exchanged numbers, now being able to communicate outside your bakery hours during the week.

xander favorite thing was to spam you with pictures of himself eating blueberry scones, and you swore you were gonna block him everytime.

summer went by in a flash, and the school went back into session; you were entering your junior year.

xander and you continued to hang out all the time, even more than you did with your own friends. he was always the one to find you around school, no matter the schedule you had that day.

he loved to sneak up on you and jump scare you, making your heart leap out your chest everytime. you would hit his arm in retaliation everytime and swore you were gonna unfriend him if he didn’t stop. you never actually did though.

xander made sure to pull you out your comfort zone. he sometimes dragged you (sometimes physically) to the refectory to go and eat with him. occasionally, his friends would join as well. rebecca was easy to talk to since you already knew her, and thea was…. complicated, but she had her good parts once she warmed up to you.

you then demanded xander eat lunch with you and mia to compensate for eating at the refectory every now and then.

he obliged, but you told him it was better if he didn’t after he got kicked out the archive for talking loudly. he swore the archive keeper had it out for him.

he continued the ritual of giving you a blueberry muffin made by the chefs of his home. sometimes you'd bring your own lemon scone and give it to him, negotiating that you'll eat your scone if he eats his.

he'd always agree, but eat it begrudgingly. you swore he was warming up to the scone.

you two took your hangouts to after school. if you worked, it'd be at the bakery and if not, you'd go to the park and just walk.

you invited him over to your house one day after school, xander excitedly accepted. you were a bit nervous he'd think poorly of your home since you were sure he lived in a glorious mansion.

you introduced him to both of your parents, and they greeted him kindly, but your mom embarrassingly asked if he was your boyfriend.

you were quick to make a joke to cover your pink cheeks, "mom, we'd never work out we have complete different tastes in scones."

xander cut in, "well, you know what they say, opposites do attract."

was he flirting with you, or were you reading into it? and why did you like it.

xander ended up really enjoying your house; he even once said he found it more peaceful than his own. so, you guys now frequently hung out at your house after school to talk, banter, study, and or even help each other with projects.

even though you tried to avoid it, xander ending up seeing your art.

it was unintentional; you were seated at a table in an art space working on a sketch, of whatever came to mind, with your earphones in. you didn't hear xander walk in and call your name.

you noticed his presence when he swiped your drawing book. you quickly took out your earphones and tried to reach for it back, but he'd already seen your drawing. and to make matters worse it was a sketch of him.

you were mortified, but he just looked at it in admiration.

he asked if you made it, and you shyly said you had.

"can't believe you were trying to hide your talent from me. now, as an apology ur going to let me keep this."

you immediately said no, and went to take it out of his hand. but xander was quicker and took the page from the journal and held it above his head, out of reach.

after a lot of jumping to reach it, which was required because he's very tall, you gave up and let him have it. xander was pleased with that, and has carried it everywhere in his wallet since then.

he now always pestered you about your art, wanting to see it or wanting you to make a piece for him. you had to admit, you found it flattering.

to make it fair, you wanted to see him in action working on something. he was delighted to show you his robots, and some of his process making them.

you were amazed at his talent, but he could be careless at times.

for instance, you two were in the lab room and you were watching him working on a new formula to fuel his robots. he turned on bunsen burner and before you knew it, it exploded.

he ended up with a missing eyebrow, and you were laughing hysterically. you still have pictures of him without it much to xander's dismay.

you knew you'd grown a crush on the charismatic guy, but you were too scared to admit it.

you weren't sure if he felt the same way, and a part of you felt silly for even thinking he would.

you confided in mia about it, and she was convinced xander was head over heels for you. but you still weren't quite sure, and you didn't want to damage a really good friendship.

in middle of october, xander's grandfather, tobias hawthorne passed away.

he wasn't at school that day, but you assumed he was out sick or doing something important. it wasn't until you heard the news from peers talking about it did you put it together.

you immediately sent him a text sending your condolences and asked if he needed anything.

you didn't hear from him for the rest of the week, which worried you - but you knew, like rebecca, people tend to want their space when loved ones pass.

it was a friday night, you were studying for an upcoming test in your world history class on monday, when you hear a sound from your window.

you ignored it at first thinking it was a wondering animal or just trees against each other. but then you heard it repeatedly, and you realized it was sounding more like a tap against the glass.

you carefully slid your curtains from the window and took a peak outside. you then came face to face with the boy you hadn't seen all week.

it took you a moment to register it was him, you yelped at the first sight of someone outside. but then he started motioning for you to open the window and then you noticed it was xander hawthorne.

you unlatched the lock on your window and slide it open enough he could fit through. but it didn't stop him from tripping on your window still and falling onto the ground with a 'thud'.

"shh! my parents might've heard that!"

"wow, instead of helping a poor fallen man up, you scold him. what ever happened to warm hospitality?"

you ignored him and held your hand out to help him up. once he was stood up, you waited for him to explain why he was here.

he went on to say he didn't have a specific reason, he just needed to get out of his mansion home. "the first place i thought of to go was here, with you."

you swore your heart leaped when he said that. you were praying to whoever was listening that your face wasn't a tomato. how do you even respond to such a heartfelt statement?

luckily, you didn't need to respond to that because he was quick to follow up his words.

"actually, you seem to be the first person i think about every day. no matter what i'm doing, I'll start to think of what'd you be saying if you were there. anytime i see the sunset, my thought shifts to what it look like if you painted it. hell, i've even found myself eating, yes eating, lemons scones because they bring me reminiscence of you."

xander crept closer as his words flowed out. and you were frozen to your spot. heart pounding louder as he took another step closer to you - leaving less than a foot of space between the two of you.

unsure of how to react you said the first thing that came to mind.

"well, uh, maybe you should think about inflation that usually keeps my mind busy." idiot. why do you open your big mouth.

xander gives you a grin, obviously amused at your nervous rambling like the little jerk he is. he was so close to you, you were embarrassed at the possibility he could he your heart pounding.

he moves his right hand to the side of your face, brushing his thumb over your cheek - eyes never leaving yours. you didn't have the strength to look away or even move, as if he was a vampire who compelled you to stay still.

"i've never known someone to get red so easily as you."

you then realized how much of your face was burning, and then after that statement it heated up even further. stupid nervous system.

"i didn't think your face could get a deeper scarlet than it was a moment ago," he laughs, "it's quite adorable honestly."

oh, god. this guy had your heart fluttering at after calling you adorable.

"i wonder how red you'll get when i kiss you."

you did not have a moment to process what xander utter because at the next second his collided his lips upon yours.

nothing prepared you for how exhilarating kissing him felt. your knees gave out a little, and xander was quick to keep you steady. you weren't even ashamed, stuck in a trance by the kiss. it was as if a scene from a jane austen novel had come to life.

boy, was he a good kisser. it was unfair really, how perfect he could he at anything he wants.

when the two of you pulled away, he was the first to speak up.

"you're about as red as crayon right now."

that was enough to bring you back to reality and shove him.

immediately after that night, the two of you began dating.

at first you thought it was unsaid that the both of you were now dating, but you should've known better than to believe xander hawthorne would take the subtle way.

the following monday you were in the refectory waiting on xander, who'd ask you to meet him there. however, you hadn't seen him yet, so you just sat down at an open table.

suddenly, you hear some sort of a mechanical noises coming from behind you. you turned you heard toward it and nothing could have prepared you to see a life sized R2-D2 robot gliding straight towards you - holding flowers in its utility arm.

what the hell was in your breakfast that morning?

when it made it way in front of you, you were completely stunned. you could feel the gazes of people in the room also witnessing this. the robot look scarily realistic to the ones in the star wars movies, xander really was a genius.

the robot extended another arm to reveal a small envelope. you took it in your own hand, along with the flowers.

WILL YOU BE MY GIRLFRIEND?

a. yes

b. a

c. kiss me

you rolled your eyes at his antics, maybe genius was an overstatement. then you noticed some scribble at the bottom.

p.s. NUTR NUAORD

at first sight of the words - you thought you were having a stroke, but then you figured out you had to unscrambled it to reveal the words 'TURN AROUND'.

of course, xander was always one for puzzles.

you follow the directions of the note and saw the man himself standing before you with a basket full of both lemon and blueberry scones.

"a tough choice, i know. personally, option c is the most appealing."

you wanted to smack the smugness of out him, but instead you opted to answer with letter c.

dating xander was chaotic to say the least, but you wouldn't have it any other way.

you two were never allowed to go on ordinary dates, xander always made sure they were memorable.

for your first date he took you to an escape room, but reserved the whole thing just for the two of you. xander was obviously a pro at the game, but you were quick to figure things out as well. the two of you got the quickest escape time.

at the end of it, he gifted you gold chained necklace with an 'x' and a golden key. you wore it all the time after.

another time you were taken to a amusement park, also reserved for the two of you. you clung on to xander on the scariest rides, much to his enjoyment. it wasn't until the end you saw how there had been pictures taken of you both while on the rides - your expression being fear on almost all of them while your arm was tight grabbing xander's. of course his face was just his charming giant grin of excitement.

he made sure to keep them all and put it as had lock screen despite how much you told him not to.

xander was now way more lenient about the lemon scone thing, and you can proudly say he even enjoys them now. nonetheless, the tradition at lunch is still on-going.

the most nerve wracking part of your relationship was meeting his family.

you learned just how rich xander and his family are. you knew he came from a lot of money, but you were never informed he was related to a billionaire. you couldn't comprehend how having that much money was possible, but xander, of course, acted nonchalant about the whole thing. rich people.

his brothers were all pleasant to meet. nash was the nicest, similar to his brother, he was a charmer with a country accent. grayson was more closed off, and didn't say a lot, but greeted you nicely. jameson, was a wild card, he was a bit drunk, but everyone collectively chose to remain obvious to it. he was also very flirty with you, but you knew it was mainly to annoy xander.

apparently it worked because the following day jameson was found with green hair.

you were introduced to his aunt and mother. his aunt was also pleasant, keeping greeting formal. his mother was.... interesting... the interaction was small, but based on some remarks and backhanded compliments; she looked down on your lower status. xander was quick to defend you and apologize after.

you later were asked to open the front door with a jumble of keys that all looked the same. you assumed this was suppose to be a test of some sort, but you weren't a mastermind at puzzles games like the other hawthornes.

instead, you found a big rock near the front entrance and smashed it against the door locks until they broke.

the brothers looked all bewildered at your action. xander was the first to burst out laughing, come around you to wrap and arm on your shoulder and kiss your forehead.

"that's my girl. who needs logic when you have big rocks."

xander was your biggest supporter in everything. he loved every piece of art you made, and never let you scrap or throw any of it anyway. anything you ever drew or painted him, he would keep it framed and hung in a section of his room dedicated to your work.

he shows up to every art show you have, bragging to people around how his amazing girlfriend painted the work. you always blush in embarrassment, but it never failed to make you happy.

you showed the same support for his activities as well. you cheered him on at my robotic competitions and you were his assistant in helping with small tasks during his building and experiments.

xander made robots were mainly made for doing simple things in overly complicated ways. he also occasionally gifted you robots for small annoying tasks you would offhandedly mention to him.

for instance, xander was walking you to your next class, carrying your backpack as he always insisted it was his job to do. you joked about how you wished he was always around to carry your stuff so your arms wouldn't be so tired.

a few weeks later he gave you a small robot designed to carrying items such as a backup and books. he even gave it wheels so it could follow you around the school like a puppy.

with xanders extroverted personality, it shouldn't surprised you he is not opposed to any PDA. which thea always gags to in the background if she's there to witness it.

he always has his arm around you, preferably your waist, or interlocks your hands together. he loves to gives you random kisses on the forehead or cheek. xander's favorite thing is to surprise you with a kiss on the lips in public, just so he can see you blush.

your first time with xander was very romantic and he made sure it would be. there were candles all over his bedroom and rose petals scattered on the ground.

although xander was known for being a bit cocky, he was just as nervous as you that night, wanting to make everything special just for you.

once he made sure you were comfortable - it was like a switch flipped - his cocky persona was back ten fold.

let’s just say the next day you couldn’t feel your legs, nor could you hide the multiple purple marks left on you.

of course, ever the gentlemen he was - he made you breakfast in bed the next morning.

you were even more shocked to find out that was his first time. why is he miraculously good at everything?

you hung out a lot more at the hawthorne mansion, xander showed you different passages around it. the house was so huge it felt like you've only ever seen 50% of it.

you grew closer to the other hawthorne brothers, taking part in family game night. you after a game of their version of chutes and ladders, you were quick to turn down some offers to play a game.

you also became good friends with avery grambs, you had first met her at the will reading, xander inviting you for moral support. you related to how out of place her and her sister felt around highly rich people.

the events of the will were shocking, but you were happy to find out she'd be sticking around. her moving into the mansion made it easier to hang out with her. you helped her adjust to heights country day and became close.

you and xander both helped avery with what you could in solving the clues his grandather left behind for avery and the hawthornes. although, you kept quiet about the fact xander knew a lot more than he was telling.

however, xander was reluctant to let you join them on anymore research after almost getting shot at when you went along with avery and jameson.

you’d never seen him so mad at his brother, cursing him up and down for putting you in that situation.

xander was insistent for you to stay behind from then on, but you relented and kept tagging along with the others on their little scavenger hunts. xander realized he couldn’t stop you, so he forbid you from going on any clue hunts without him by your side.

it was cute how protective he was, but a little annoying too.

one day you were walking around the mansion with xander looking for jameson, who had wondered off to who knew where. you came across an unfamiliar office. you had asked xander who it belonged to and he informed you it was his grandfathers, now technically avery's.

the two of you entered the office space, you figured xander was curious if anything had changed since his grandfather's passing or if he had maybe left another clue behind.

you were looking around until you eyes came across something behind his desk - a large portrait of who you assumed was tobias hawthorne. upon further inspection, you came to realize another thing.

you painted this portrait.

"holy shit."

even beyond the grave tobias hawthorne keeps on spurring surprises.

#the inheritance games #the inheritance trilogy #avery grambs #grayson hawthorne #jameson hawthorne #nash hawthorne #xander hawthorne #xander hawthorne x reader #xander hawthorne fic #xander hawthorne imagine #x reader #x y/n #reader insert #reader imagine #fanfic

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chayscribbles · 8 months

Text

chayscribbles’ monthly writing update ☆ august/september 2023 double feature

☆ STATISTICS.

words written: 4273 in august; none in september BUT that's because i did a lot of revising

projects worked on: Gemini Heist in august; Andromeda Rogue in september, then procrastinated so hard i ended up writing a few paragraphs on Third, Secret Wip

proudest accomplishment: i compiled all my AR1 beta feedback without giving in to the urge to set the book on fire and also myself

books read: Network Effect (Murderbot Diaries #5) by Martha Wells

☆ GENERAL COMMENTS.

so basically i started off august decently solid, working on gemini heist while andromeda rogue was off being torn apart by the betas. (i'm joking. it didn't get torn apart. i think you guys were being way too nice actually.)

and then all kinds of shit hit the fan in my personal life all at once in mid-august. both good and bad. it was a lot.

anyways the first half of september was spent recovering from all that, BUT i took a week off work mid-september to catch my breath and also get back into writing, and it was really good for me.

on another note! i am very seriously considering making an etsy shop for some of my art, because as much as i loathe the thought of monetizing my hobbies, we are living in a cost of living crisis, and i don't wanna be in my ice water soup era forever, ha. anyways stay tuned. (and if you think it would be a good idea/you think yourself or others would be interested in buying things PLEASE LET ME KNOW. EXPLICITLY. because otherwise i will assume no one cares and the idea will fizzle out.)

more specific wip-related comments + featured excerpt below.

☆ COMMENTS: ANDROMEDA ROGUE (draft 2 editing)

i went through all the beta comments during my week off and while i am glad it doesn't look like i'll have to do any more BIG rewrites, editing sucks and i want to give up.

☆ COMMENTS: THE GEMINI HEIST (draft 0.5. okay fine it's draft 1 but i feel better about myself if i call it draft 0.5 okay)

honestly when i was working on this feels sooo long ago i don't even remember what there is to say?

i hit 20K at some point in august. i think.

OH YEAH i "finished" act 2/7. the quotation marks are because i absolutely did not finish it, i only finished writing all the main plot-relevant scenes and skipped anything else. which means there's like a whole chapter and a half that haven't actually been written bc they're probably gonna be exposition or character building stuff that i haven't figured out yet and i'm hoping will be easier once i know what actually happens in the rest of this story. (reminder that i am a plantser.)

anyways i suspect this wip will be going dormant again for a while as i focus on getting AR ready for publishing. (sidenote it's been over a year since i started the GH draft and i feel like i've done fuck all on it besides come up with useless lore and make extremely specific playlists. world's slowest writer. the playlists slap, though.)

☆ FEATURED EXCERPT.

uh have this random snippet of Euna about to pop off!

Somewhere far, far, away, Leo was shouting, “Just get your ass out of there, Li!” but her voice seemed muffled in Euna’s ears, blocked out by the rage that had been steadily mounting ever since that guard shot her arm and ruined the fight for her. All she could hear was the blood rushing through her own ears, the buzz of the guard’s electrified gauntlets, the crackle of the electricity in her own hand. She reared her good fist back and slammed it into the guard’s face. Their nose made a sickening crunch against Euna’s knuckles. Blood flowed down over their mouth and chin as they staggered back, but Euna wasn't done. Her right arm, still spouting sparks, swung into the side of their head, finally bringing them down. Before they could get up again, Euna dropped on top of them, pinning them to the ground with her knees on their chest. She grabbed their shoulders and yanked their upper body off the floor, preparing to slam them down one last time— Purple light surrounded her. For a frightening second, she couldn’t move. Then she was thrown off the guard and dragged, upside-down, through the air towards the exit.

☆ TAGLISTS. let me know if you want to be added/removed to any of them.

general taglist:

@nicola-writes @dgwriteblr @the-orangeauthor @onomatopiya @quilloftheclouds @ashen-crest @writeblrfantasy @celestepens @stardustspiral @pepperdee @extra-magichours @avi-why @lefttigerobservation @chazzawrites @bardolatrycore @innocentlymacabre

andromeda trilogy taglist:

@bebewrites @nicola-writes @dgwriteblr @the-orangeauthor @onomatopiya @akindofmagictoo @quilloftheclouds @nora-theteawriter @ashen-crest @corpsepng @writeblrfantasy @toboldlywrite @celestepens @stardustspiral @pepperdee @cheerfulmelancholies @extra-magichours @writeouswriter @cilly-the-writer @lefttigerobservation @rose-bookblood @drowsy-quill @chazzawrites @cynic-and-chief @enchanted-lightning-aes @aesa @outpost51

gemini heist taglist:

@florraisons @akindofmagictoo @cream-and-tea @nicola-writes @memento-morri-writes @antique-symbolism @rose-bookblood @afoolandathief @pepperdee @avi-why @zonnemaagd @chazzawrites @analogued @enchanted-lightning-aes @innocentlymacabre @kahvilahuhut @celestepens @cilly-the-writer @extra-magichours @onomatopiya @outpost51

#chayscribbles writing update #wip andromeda trilogy #wip andromeda rogue #wip gemini heist

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lysol1201 · 2 years

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Hi! 😳 👉🏻👈🏻 I saw your writing prompt post and was wondering if you could do Mammon and “I could cry, that’s how much I love you” BC HONESTLY SAME 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 I love Mammom so much honestly 👀

Also it’s completely up to you too! No pressure if you don’t want to 😳👉🏻👈🏻

SORRY, THIS TOOK SO LONG! I got a little busy with some art and work, but I finally put something together! Thank you so much for the ask! I hope you enjoy it!

If you want to ask for my 200-follower prompt list, here's the post! Leave me an ask for what prompt you want and the character!!~ <33

"I could cry, that's how much I love you." Mammon x GN!Reader

Words Count: 1139

++++

Mammon wasn’t the greatest when it came to speaking his mind. It was hard for him to really tell you just how much he loved you. Especially when he loved you so fucking much. He was afraid that saying it would just ruin everything with you. It was getting so much harder and harder every day though. He was so close to just exploding with wanting to tell you.

Here you found yourself hanging out in the room of your “first”, the Avatar of Greed. He was teaching you how to play poker so you could go to the casino with him that night.

“Are you sure this is how you play poker?” You asked with a raised eyebrow and a small smile on your face. Knowing Mammon, this is not the right way.

“It’s the way to play if you want to win!” He explains to you with confidence in his voice and posture. “Just listen to me, I know what I’m doing!”

“Are you sure? Aren’t you like in debt with the casino-”

“Shhh, we don’t talk about that! Just a small detail we can brush aside!” He kept the confidence in how voice, though this time he seemed to rush through the sentence. “Changing the topic now,” He ignored the question. “After the casino, do you maybe want to like go to Hell’s Kitchen or something with me?”

Mammon tried to continue with the confidence but as soon as the words left his mouth, he felt the need to backtrack again. Especially with that look on your face. You’re totally thinking the wrong way, that’s not what he meant obviously. “Not like a date or anything! I would never go on a date with you! I just get hungry after gambling!”

When he said those words he somewhat felt sad. And he can kind of tell in your expression that maybe you felt sad too?

“You would never go on a date with me?”

Of course not, I would love to go on a date with you! Always, I wanna be with you, and hold you, and make you mine! But of course he couldn’t say that out loud. Only in his head and heart.

“Never! I mean, you’re just a human. I am THE Great Mammon! Why would I ever go on a date with someone so weak?” He hurt himself with his own words. No, no, no, why are you saying this you idiot? Damn you!

Your frown quickly became more prominent. So did the gloss in your eyes that he hated to see. He wanted to hold you so bad. “Yeah, okay I guess,” You spoke meakly, sinking into your chair. “I don’t know if I’m in the mood to go to the casino anymore.” Your voice cracked through your sentence, standing up quickly as soon as you finished.

“Hey, wait!” Mammon stood up quickly and went after you as you headed towards the door to leave his room. “Where are you going?”

“My room,” You answered immediately, knowing you just wanted to be anywhere but there.

“Wait, but,” Mammon started to stutter trying to find an excuse, but he couldn’t find anything. So, he spat out the words that lived in his brain. “I don’t want you to go. I want you here. With me.” He blushed, not only from the fear of making a mistake but almost pride in finally being able to say the words he’s been wanting to say for so long.

“Why would you want me here? I’m just a human,” You rolled your eyes, ignoring him trying his best to get you to stay.

When you reached for the doorknob of his room, he rushed to stand in front of it to block any way to let you out.

“I love you!” He shouted at you.

What? Did I just say that? He thought to himself.

“What?” You asked in a volume that almost could not be heard by any living creature. Yet, the world went completely silent for Mammon and the only voice he could hear clearly was yours. His favorite sound.

“I, I,” He stuttered, trying to find the courage to say the words he’s been wanting to say for so long. “I love you, damn it! I love you! I want to spend time with you, but I’m afraid that if I say these things you’ll run away from me! So I say the exact opposite! Okay?”

It almost sounded like he was scolding you, but you knew that was just him using everything in him to fight the urge to not say the words he’s been wanting to say. “Really?”

“Yes! Really! I really, really love you!” He continued to shout, not even thinking about the fact that you two were next to his door out of his room so if anyone was nearby they could hear him loud and clear. “I just want to be next to you all the time, I want to take you on dates, and treat you to dinner, and hold you, and watch movies with you, all of those romantic things you see in those stupid romance movies! I want to do them with you!”

“I love you so much that I would sell every single object in this room if it made you happy, that I would move to human world with you, I would follow you to the end of all three realms!”

“I could cry, that’s how much I love you.” Mammon rambled on and on until he finally finished with those words.

By the time he finished, you already found yourself in tears with a wide smile on your face. Then you started to chuckle. “Why are you laughing, I just poured my heart out to you!” He complained, a blush prominent on his face.

“Because, you said you could cry from how much you love me,” You said with a giggle. “But Mammon, you’re already crying.”

“I am?”

“Yes.”

Mammon raised a hand to his cheek and funnily enough, you were right. His cheeks were wet with tears. “Oh,” He looked at his wet hand, then back up to you. “Well I could keep crying, that’s how much I love you!”

You continued to laugh through your tears at how much of an idiot he was. But he was the idiot you loved. He was your idiot.

You both started to laugh at each other, finding the situation funny. The both of you just crying and laughing in a moment where it felt like all three worlds only revolved around you two. Through the smiles, you finally closed the gap between you two to give him the kiss you both were oh so wanting for the longest time.

He loved you and you loved him. What more could a demon ask for?

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me mammon #mammon x reader #mammon x mc #obey me x reader #obey me x mc

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homocidal-invader · 1 year

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ok. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40

Well dang :V

1: What was the first episode you’ve seen? Episode 1 because I intentionally looked for the show to watch it after seeing clips of it online.

2: What’s your favorite episode? Episode 1. It's one of my favorite first episodes of a show ever and I really like how well it introduces everything. I love other episodes of the show of course I just think the first episode did a great job and should get more praise for that!

3: Favorite Irken? I like the main character a lot but if I had to choose a second favorite uhhh the Tallests as 1 entity I can't choose one over the other

4: Favorite Human? I like the other main character a lot also but as a second Professor Membrane bc he's funny and I had a mental image of him before watching the show

5: Favorite Other Race? There aren't really a lot of those to pick from :V

6: Any fan characters? Yesssss a few but this particular one I made several comics about

7: Favorite fanfiction? It's NSFW and I haven't actually finished the full series because it's long and I suck at reading! I might consider linking it at another point :V Favorite bc I took some inspiration from it for Est and I enjoy NSFW fics lol.

8: Favorite fanart?

I've got a few really inspirational ones on my computer! I recently made a long comment on the Irken propoganda poster fanart (and made my own fanart based off of it), I like the Corrupted Data 99% one (and made my own fanart based off of it), I like this sketch dump of Tallest Zims bc it's cool and bc of the comment "all I do is lie to myself" which I quote all the time now, this FnF song video that I keep trying to do a full version of because the OP said I could but haven't gotten around to it yet, and a bunch more I don't feel like tracking down lol.

9: Do you write for the fandom? Well I make comics but for fanfiction I've made one, short ZaDr fic but in character somehow

10: Do you draw for the fandom? Yes, here's my art tag for this blog and here's my askblog

11: Would you be scared if Jhonen found your art/fanfics/blog? I've watched his Twitch streams (he might still be doing that every Monday?) and sometimes when he searches stuff up he ends up scrolling past fanart and doesn't acknowledge it lol. So not really, he's not as mean a guy as the fandom seems to demonize him wrongly as. I actually think meeting him would be pretty cool!

12: Do you like pairings? If so, which? I mean aside from ZaDr I like RaPr and basically am open to any if ppl write it in a way I like. Those two I just enjoy in particular.

13: Do you believe there are any canon pairings? Like, intended by the writers? I don't remember any prominent characters dating canonically no lol.

14: OTP? ZaDr. I watched episode 1 and shipped it immedietely after their first interaction XD If that's not a "One True Pairing" I'm not sure what is.

15: Favorite enemies? (Tak and Zim or Zim and Dib… etc) Does enemies to lovers count? Idk I am more of a HELPLESS ROMANTIC type I am only into enemies if it's charged in some way XD Otherwise it sticks out to me less so nothing really comes to mind that easily.

16: Favorite Tallest of the four? I can't choose Red or Purple it changes every day! I like Miyuki and Spork but come on they don't have that much screentime and Red and Purple have far more changes to be funny lol

17: Favorite thing about Invader Zim? ADHD and artstyle

18: Least favorite thing about Invader Zim? that's hard. Even when the show disturbs me I take it as a positive. Uhhh. when ppl in the fandom are judgemental about other people's headcanons in a mean way lol

19: Do you have any blocked tags, relating to the fandom? probably but finding out would mean I'd have to look through my blocked tags! I frequently block people though.

20: Do you ever do crossovers? I had some Gravity Falls crossover sketches back in 2021, and I've done a few crossovers between characters in my own discord servers sometimes, but nothing large/prominent.

...Unless crossovers between zim askblogs count.

21: Any parts of show that actually scare you? Probably not scare but definitely disturb me. I'd need to rewatch it to remember.

22: Any parts of the fandom that actually scare you? I'm very sensitive as a person and have anxiety so people scare me easily!

23: Part that made you laugh the hardest… I'd need to go clip hunting for that! Good news though I recorded myself watching IZ with a friend in 2021 and am slowly editing the clips so I'll find out eventually.

24: Part that you could relate to… Zim very ADHD

25: Least favorite episode? I like all the episodes and I see grossing me out as a bonus bc rarely do things disturb me and it means that it succeeded but uhhhhhh I mean least likely to rewatch probably rise of the zitboy lol

26: Least favorite scene? Sometimes there's fatphobia in the show and that sucks :V

27: Do you like G.I.R.? YES I don't draw him as often as other characters but if you look around my askblog he makes it into tons of the posts lol

28: If you could be anyone from the show, you would choose….. Trying to send me to hell??? Rude.

29: Are the Tallest intelligent or not? Yeah they just don't care lol

30: What do you think an Irkens blood color is? I like it when it's either pink or matches their eye color. I want a rainbow blood smear of irkens after war. imagine it.

31: If you could write an episode, what would happen? I've thought of several fake episode scripts, like where Dib gets suspended for pushing Zim at school and goes to a better nicer school, then ends up back at normal school at the end of the episode because the world is built to hurt Dib, or an episode where Zim gets stuck in his elevator and can't get out bc his PAK legs are too long and his rockets are useless and GIR is useless.

If I could write an episode though it'd probably end up being gay shit tho ngl

32: If all the voice actors and artists were different, would you still want Invader Zim to come back? Well if the writers are the same... hmm, though a lot of what was good about IZ was the synnergy between all the writers, artists, and VAs, like Rikki who voiced GIR also being a background artist, and somehow a bunch of these ppl are still friends 20 years later.

I think it'd be fun to see it even if they totally and completely fuck it up though because then the fandom would tear it apart and it'd be funny

33: Do you consider any of the characters your ‘babies’? Depends on the day but I do love random navigator drone from Florpus. Baby bc Evv is totally based off of them XD Adopted!

34: Do you have any fancharacters that are the result of two canon characters getting together? Fankids? I'd say Wur, even though it's not Dib's biological kid he's still its dad XD

35: If you could meet any of the characters, who would it be and what would you say? Dib's insufferable but I think he just wants someone to listen to him lol

36: If you could meet any of the voice actors, who would it be and what would you say? Probably Richard bc I've seen lots of interviews with him and he just seems really friendly and nice to talk to!

37: Other than Zim, who is your favorite Irken Invader? Damn :V Well we don't really get to meet the other invaders much, do we? Like it's either Skoodge or you just REALLY like a background character lol

38: Professor Membrane: a good daddy or a neglectful cold father? I'd like him to be good but yk all the times he's good it could just be argued it's because his kids are science experiments XD When I write him he's neglectful and cold but more on accident than intentional abuse. He wants the best for his kids but he's just not equipped to deal with their emotions.

39: Favorite quote? I'd need to rewatch the show there's too many good ones lol

40: Zim’s taken over the planet… Now what? Calls the Tallests to tell them about it and they're like..... We're not flying over there!!! Uh... we told you to watch it not take it over!!! uhhhh whatever, good job [disconnects].

Zim would have his fun being king for a day then things get back to normal by the end of the episode lol

#verm1c1de

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malewifemammon · 2 years

Text

oh yeah baby kam's peter post made me want to share some of my own thoughts abt him (but also i didn't wanna tack em on in a reblog bc my thoughts r very related to Personal Stuff About Me and i didn't want to make their post my storytime i guess haha)

cw for mentions of sexual harassment/assault under the cut, as well as discussion of germophobia and ocd! also uh maybe some peter hate so if u don't wanna read that don't open the post! and have a nice day ^_^

so like i'm definitely not the type of person to say that nobody should ever like characters who do bad things, or that unhealthy relationships should Never be portrayed in art. so if you like peter or his dynamic with alice, please don't take this as me saying you shouldn't do that.

but like i've been into this series since i was about twelve or maybe even eleven? (long hours largely unsupervised with my best friend at the local library waiting for my mom to finish work) and while i definitely didn't understand healthy relationship dynamics all that much, i still took issue with peter forcing a kiss on alice from the get-go. i'll be honest, that along with his attitude towards her made me hate him right off the bat. these days i definitely think he has interesting and/or comedic potential in some situations, but that particular side of him still freaks me out. obviously. he was my least favorite of alice's potential interests (besides the twins).

BUT something kam brought up in their post kind of clicked with me.

around middle school, i started developing symptoms of ocd (i think triggered by a lot of stressful life events happening in quick and intense succession on top of the usual chaos of middle school). eventually it got on to be actual ocd, which i still deal with to this day. and my biggest trigger has been germs/uncleanliness. i didn't used to have this obsession with contamination, so i'm pretty sure i didn't have it when i first got into nkna. but as time went on i saw more and more of myself in that aspect of peter.

i really didn't want to, since i disliked him so much (not to mention how often ocd or similar traits are either played for jokes in most media or given to eccentric villain types to make them seem more Weird™). but over time it got harder to ignore.

kam brings up that bc of his germophobia, peter doesn't really have much experience in the way of romantic/sexual interactions. and it made me think of myself.

because aside from my tendency to not be able to interact with others all that well, my cleanliness ocd is a big stumbling block in the way of physical intimacy, of ANY kind, but especially romantic/sexual since that tends to be more... involved. and there's the screenshot of peter telling alice smth about how he doesn't mind Her Germs specifically, which is probably something i've said almost word for word to my own partner. they were my first for a lot of things, both because of my anxiety but also because of the germ thing. (side note i love them very much they're so cool and good about My Tendencies lol) and it can be really weird to be in a relationship with someone who has a lot more experience than you sometimes, because it can be easy to worry that you're somehow letting them down (not that i get the sense alice gets out all that much either, but still). but i also know the overwhelming joy and relief that comes with finding someone whose germs you don't mind.

AND IT DRIVES ME CRAZY haha because i still don't really like peter! i think it's funny to bully him but also sometimes he does genuinely anger me. and it's been an odd experience to feel myself become more like him in this very specific way over the years, to relate to some of his fears and such. not to mention, i don't remember his germophobia being played as a joke all that much?

i mean there probably are moments where it is, i wouldn't be surprised, but comparing the way he's treated as opposed to, say, death the kid from soul eater... it feels different. [i could make a whole other post about my feelings on kid but i digress]

he's just a character that i personally have a lot of really complex feelings about, because on the one hand he can be a total scumbag who i hate, but on the other hand he seems to encapsulate certain struggles i've dealt with that i don't see illustrated in media very often. he's really important to me but also i want to kick the shit out of him ^_^

anyway. i don't think i really had A Point to all of this, just wanted to jot down some of my own ideas on him ig

#nkna #.txt #peter #honking #← hope it's ok to take inspo from ur thoughtful honking tag kam if u see this lol #it makes me smile and also i'm a bit of an aspiring clown so it feels thematically appropriate

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inkofamethyst · 2 years

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August 1, 2022

If someone mentions the 1890s I practically froth at the mouth and I blame that exclusively on Bernadette Banner.

It doesn’t help that Absolute History has plenty of documentaries/series based on that era. I binged Victorian House and have found comfort in the Arts and Crafts movement of the late Victorian era. It’s a lovely little series that combines historical documentary, reality television, and competition in a package complete with lovely costuming.

I made butter cookies [edit: my mom says they taste like shortbread which I’ve never had but I’ve been binging Victorian Upstairs Downstairs and Rose used a beautiful mold to form a shortbread she made and now I want one desperately] and by themselves they’re just alright but with strawberry jam??? Impeccable. Eating one I feel like I’ve stepped into one of those cottagecore aesthetic photos. I just need some fresh fruit, a field, a picnic blanket, and a sundress and that could be me. I generally do not trust the oven in my apartment’s kitchen but since my meal plan this semester is going to be minimal I think I might try baking cookies in there every once in a while. I just wish I was faster at cooking you know? It’s another one of those things where I just have to remind myself that practicing it will make me better and that I can’t expect to immediately master cooking or anything for that matter and that it’s okay to have little (or big) fails along the way.

Speaking of things I’m getting better at, I finished the pink dress (it’s okay, and I’m glad I made it, but I need to find an event to wear it to) and immediately began working with the seafoam/robin egg blue cotton/linen. I basically worked on that thing for a whole day and cranked out most of what I’m calling a “double pleat” skirt (ankle length, side pocket opening, white cotton ‘round the interior hem (literally just copying Sondeflor tbh but it’s not like I’m selling it, I just think it’s a cute detail)) which basically gives more flare for each pleat than a normal 3-times-your-waist (this came out to ~4.5 times my waist!) and it’s kind of fantastic and I want to make so many more of these. It went together super quick (and I took my time, basting each pleat by hand) bc it was just rectangles (after I worked out the math) and I mean its main purpose is going to be a Renn Faire piece probably because the single issue with it is that I sewed some of the rectangles together (I had to use piecing bc the fabric wasn’t wide enough) on the selvages since usually the selvages are the most stable parts of the fabric but after I’d finished french seaming pretty much everything I discovered that these selvages were super loosely woven and that this caused a ton of weird warping problems and it’s like not terrible but it is certainly noticeable (and also bc the color isn’t really something I think I’d like to wear daily). BUT despite all that (I mean there’s a small chance that I could fix the warping issue but I’d have to be really careful) I really like it! It’s super voluminous and makes me feel like a fairytale maiden. Oh to be an elf named Elowyn galivanting through a forest devoid of creepy crawlies and wearing an impractically long dress (though I must say I’m glad I went for a two-piece, more mixing and matching that way (once I get to making more pieces, that is)).

The next part of the faire kit is going to be a bodice (made from the princess seam block which I’ve finally finished, I think) which will be made from whatever’s left over from the skirt fabric, flatlined with muslin probably (or maybe linen if I can find some stashed away). Ideally I’ll bind the edges with bias tape and figure out how to bind eyelets by hand, but we’ll see. Maybe I’ll even bone a few seams. I’m considering making a baglined test with some home deco fabric first, we’ll see.

As you can see, now that school is a month away, I’ve entered crunch time on my projects. I still need to prepare substantial handsewing projects.

Today I’m thankful that I might have a TA position for a class I’ve wanted to be a TA in for a year, and I may have the chance to do it twice: this winter and again in the spring. Nothing’s official, but I’m still very very very excited. I’m also thankful that I didn’t get a ticket on campus today (the parking meter didn’t print my receipt and I was quite worried (as I often am) that today would be The Day). I’m also thankful that I actually enjoy the skirt I made!! I’m also thankful for Star Trek: Strange New Worlds. It was a lovely first season and I can’t wait for the second (jailbreak episode, anyone?).

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aruuq · 3 years

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The orange cheesecake – Ran Haitani

characters: ran x gn!reader

summary: it’s one of the sleepless nights, when you hear loud noises from the staircase and decide to check it. you see your friend who you always meet at the weirdest moments

genre & style: fluff, kind of humorous, it’s not sugar-coated

word count: 4.7k

notes: first of all – i have a little request to y’all – can you please go and visit my friend’s twitter and give her art some love she deserves? her posts have almost no likes, and i think it’s not deserved. she drew ran today and, please, take a quick look, bcs he’s the beauty and the grace. oh, and don’t tell her that i mentioned her here. don’t want her to feel as if it is only, ‘cause i’ve written bout her but besides that, it took me two weeks to finish this little fucker. he was supposed to be only 1.5k words, but i failed, as you can see......

warnings: wounds, blood, food, you two playfully insult each other

It was one of those chilly, yet still strangely warm, autumn nights, where the density of the air wouldn’t let you take a proper rest and kept you awake for hours. Forcing yourself to fall asleep made no sense, so you were doing everything that could possibly get you tired. You started with finishing chores you left for the following day, then proceeded to clean the old drawers filled with yellowed papers, only to find a long forgotten family recipe for an orange cheesecake. You thought that it wasn't the worst idea to bake something while checking if you had all the required ingredients.

Shortly after, the smell of a hot cheesecake was filling your flat, and as you held a knife, ready to cut yourself a slice, you heard loud noises from the staircase. It was an ungodly hour for any of your neighbours to come back. Thanks to the thin walls of the building, providing you with the clear sound of heavy shoe soles stamping heavily on the stairs, thud of metal bumping into the walls and muffled curses leaving their mouth, you were able to recognize this person.

You rushed towards your doors, when the sound was the loudest, and unlocked them quickly. Silhouette of a familiar man was almost invisible in the darkness of the stairwell. With his back to you, a metal baton in his trembling hand, he tried to climb to the next floor. “Hi,” you tell, leaning against the doorframe, dirty kitchen apron still on you.

The man turns around, and you can see his face, illuminated by the weak light from your apartment. The blood covers his face, coming from the cut on his eyebrow and his nose, a bruise slowly forming on his cheek bone. White shirt is all soaked in the dried red liquid, torn in many places. His hair is a mess, one of the braids completely destroyed, the other barely keeping together. He looks miserable. Yet, you smile softly, moving step closer towards him. “Need a patch up?”

It wasn’t the first time you’ve seen Ran at a weird hour in a place you least expected. You two seem to keep bumping into each other all the time, as if an invisible force field was drawing you to one another. Whether it’s in public transport, during your evening walks or a quick shopping trip, he’s there too. Weirdly enough, Ran seems to not even live in this area. As he usually visited the block of flats you dwelt in maximum of three to five times a month, usually at late hours, the man simply couldn’t live here.

“Tea or coffee?” You ask, rummaging in cabinets.

“Water,” he answers briefly, leaning on the edge of the couch backrest carefully so as not to stain anything with blood.

“You should drink something warm,” you give him a look over your shoulder, putting the kettle on.

“Water’s fine, I’m not planning to stay for long anyways,” he states, looking around your apartment. It’s not the first time he’s here; he has been visiting you at least five times in the past few months, be it walking you home with your groceries after he bumped into you at the supermarket, helping you with installing the tv onto the wall, or hiding in your flat from the rain after you two met at the subway station. But it’s the first time he’s here at an abnormal hour like this. It feels as if he’s invading the undisturbed, the holy state of your personal space with his somewhat sacrilegious actions. Yet, he tries to grasp every aspect of your private, domestic life in his sight.

“It may take some time to patch you properly. I insist,” you answer without taking your eyes off the tea labels.

“Then let it be coffee.”

“One coffee, here it goes~”

Ran didn’t plan to meet you tonight. Actually, it was the last thing he wanted to happen this night. But despite this, he took the risk of entering the building you lived in, and he needed to face the consequences of it – which was exposing you to the sight of his pathetic, beaten up form.

“Milk? Sugar?” You ask him, bringing two cups to the table, one with black coffee, the other with lemon balm tea.

“Nah, I don’t use either of those” he mumbles, following you with his pupils. Your movements were rapid, the porcelain left on the desk with a loud clunk. Stress visibly sticks all over you, the boy sure the fault lies in his wrecked appearance.

“They’ve gotten you pretty badly, huh?” You joke, making your way towards the bathroom where you held the first aid kit.

“You should’ve seen them,” Ran chuckles, pushing himself off the couch. His feet felt unstable, the head was spinning as the adrenaline went away a long time ago, every slightest movement causing shooting pain in his whole body. It wasn’t common for him to get out of the fight so badly, but it was not the first time either.

“Yeah, no thanks,” you grin, tiptoeing towards him. “Take your shirt off. I can see that your pretty face is not the only thing that got beaten today.”

The boy listens to you and, without any second thought, he lifts his top over his head. His whole torso is covered in deep cuts, purple bruises easily forming on his pale body. There are streaks of dried fluid all over his pecs and stomach, coloring his porcelain skin and dark tattoo crimson. You stop moving. You didn’t even think it could be that bad.

“You don’t have to do it, y’know?” Ran’s composed voice hits your ears, bringing you back to reality. “I was about to handle it myself anyways.”

“No. It’s just… I don’t even know where should I start,” you murmur, dampening a towel you just took from the cupboard in the bottled water. “Maybe let’s clean the- the dried blood first, ‘kay? Sit here.”

“I’m serious, Y/N. I know it’s not something you see on a daily basis. If it’s too much, I-“

“Just lemme do my thing, dammit!” You press the material hard against his cheek, squeezing water from the cloth onto his skin, the thin trickle dripping from his jaw. “Oh, you don’t have to do it, you don’t have to do it. Quit bitching like a princess and let. me. help you.”

At first Ran blinks mindlessly, scanning your face. Then he smirks, sitting on the creaky kitchen chair. He closes his eyelids, palms resting on the lap. “Then do your magic,” his voice cocky while he leans his body closer to you, giving you a better access to his face.

“Thank you,” you murmur a bit less annoyed, running a warm towel over his skin. Your non-dominant hand holds his chin gently, moving his head lightly as you wish. Putting some basic disinfectants onto the wounds carefully, you have a lot of time to examine the state of his face. It was swollen, visible fist marks and cuts made with some sort of a blade spread all over the soft features. “How many?” You ask so as to not sit in total silence, while working on Ran’s temple.

“How many?” He repeats, opening one eye to look at you. Your face was focused, lips pressed into a narrow line.

“Opponents. How many you had to fight?” You squeeze the bottom of his cheeks harder, lifting his head, your fingers tenderly brushing the hair off his face. “If it was only one or two, I’m sure you’d come out without a scratch.”

“Hmm…” Ran hums, frowning thoughtfully. “I think it was seven. Two with knives, one with a bat.”

“And you beat them all?”

“Of course that I did. I never lose,” he says confidently, visibly proud of himself. “Ouch.” You press the cotton ball soaked in disinfectant carefully against his brow that started to lightly bleed again.

“Yeah, sorry,” murmuring a short apology, you take the towel and change its places with the pad. “I think you should avoid conflicts a little more. It’s not the first time I've seen you bruised like this.”

“No can do,” he shrugs his arms. “It was just some pathetic little gang, needed to teach ‘em a lesson. Besides, I still have my responsibilities. Can’t just not complete them.”

“Then be more careful,” you shake your head as you treat his nose.

His purple irises glisten in confusion with every movement of your stoic face, searching for a hint of sarcasm. Ran has almost forgotten that you are so pure and innocent, almost childlike with your sincerity. Not used to the fights, the pain, the blood, the misery and the death. You were so direct and honest with your words, no ulterior motives hidden when you asked him for this simple favor. You truly, wearing the heart on your sleeve, only want him to be safe, and it is making him all warm inside. He always felt welcome in your presence, starting from the day that you two had met for the first time. You were his refuge, a crumb, a little glint of normality that was able to brighten up his life.

And that was why Ran wanted to protect you. To keep you far away from the fights to which he was exposed, the pain he experienced everyday, the blood which with his surroundings were painted, the misery that he seemed to attract, and the death from which he could not escape in particular. He’s always glad that you do not ask many questions; it’s much easier not to drag you into the world he lived in, the world you had no right to know about, yet you still seemed to know a bit too much. But you never really asked about it, and he assumed that it was better this way. The relationship between you two was so simple and it was what he treasured the most.

“You want to take a short break for coffee now? I can cut you a piece of cheesecake I just made, and you can enjoy it while I take care of your hair,” you propose after sticking the last band aid onto his face.

“First you came with a nurse, and now you’re playing a little baker? How adorable,” he laughs, patting your head. Before you have a chance to counter him, he continues. “But sure. Give me some.”

And without any more words, he passes you to settle on the couch. He looks a lot better now, with a fixed face, soft grin on his mouth, as he checks something on his phone.

“Do you have work tomorrow?” You ask, setting next to the cup of coffee a plate with your baking and freshly cut orange slices with melted dark chocolate decorating the porcelain.

“Cute,” Ran comments on the sweet ornaments as he looks from behind his phone and quickly moves his purple gaze onto you as he continues. “Based on the fact that I don’t really have any schedule for my work ‘cause I have to be always available on the phone, you may guess my answer.”

“Wow. Sounds tough,” you blurt out, making the man chortle, while you untie his braid. “Same hairstyle as always?”

“Mhm,” his hum is soft, his body stretching with the mission of reaching for coffee. “Cheers,” he murmurs in a deadpan voice, toasting with a cup.

The moment warm liquid touches his lips and passes them, spilling over his tongue, he chokes and almost spits everything onto your brand new carpet.

“You okay?” Your query hits Ran’s ears as he almost immediately pulls his hair out of your hands, while turning around aggressively.

“The fuck?” He’s indignant.

“What’s the matter?” And you are nothing but confused.

“You drink this shit?” The pure disgust forming on his tongue as he points onto the dark liquid.

You blink in disbelief. “First of all, rude. Second of all, I don’t see a problem. It’s good,” an offended murmur leaves your mouth and you roll your eyes, while turning the boy’s head straight and yanking it backwards. “And sit still. I need to brush the blood outta these tangles, y’know?”

“It’s depressing that you call this crap good, it really is,” he comments, wrinkling his nose in disgust, and as you pull his hair harder, the man clicks his tongue in reply.

“Well, I don’t really have any other options, thanks for your snarky remark,” wrapping half of his long strands on your palm, you start untangling the rest.

“No problem, that’s my pleasure,” the fingertips of his left hand ghost over the place his heart is located as he narrows his eyelids, a sly smile arising on his face.

Clenching fists at his hair, you hold the urge from smacking him at the back of his stupid little head.

“Then what type of coffee does the prince drink, huh?” You bridle as your digits work fast with Ran’s hairstyle, entwining the strands so as to create a perfect braid.

“A good one, that’s for sure. I always drink coffee at one particular cafe. Also, before you say anything, even with my little knowledge I can tell that calling this thing you absorb a coffee is a simple desecration. Only saying,” Ran raises his hands in a gesture of defense before you have the right excuse to actually hit him.

“I don’t pay visits to cafes,” you reply, stretching the rubber band on your wrist with a little help of your teeth.

“Then I must take you out there sometime, don’t I?” He’s trying to look at you, despite the fact that you stand right behind him, while making small circular shapes with his wrist. “You work tomorrow?”

“Unfortunately,” you exhale, pressing your lips into a thin line. “But I think I’ll take a day off, ‘cause I’ll surely be dead after an all-nighter.

“Poor baby,” the man chuckles doltishly. He seems much more relaxed than at the moment he entered your house, the muscles on his body visibly less tensed, one foot pressed nonchalantly against the leg of the table, the other limb bent under his thigh on the couch. “I can come over and pick you up in between my duties. Your opinion?”

“Sounds like a date to me,” you laugh as you finish the second braid, and before you have the opportunity to explain that it was only a quip, Ran’s already speaking.

“Sounds like you’re right to me.”

You go silent, your hands freeze in place, fingertips studying the texture of the man’s hair while your heart is in your throat. Was he just being nice or was it his weird way of flirting? You bite the inside of your cheek, eyes narrowing, the pensive frown on your face, as you try to analyze his behaviour. It was true that, despite your rather unstable and unusual relationship, you seemed to get along oddly well. Because of the strangely strong bond between you two, it was almost impossible to guess what really was between you. You clench your teeth tighter, thinking intensely about what to say. If you misread his thoughts, you will either hurt his feelings or you will get laughed at. Either way it’s a bad outcome.

Before the time with no response from you changes from being barely socially acceptable to the terribly awkward, you try to make a decent answer. “Yeah,” your voice is shaky as you clear your throat. “But it better be a really good coffee, ‘cause otherwise I’m gonna kick your ass.”

“Then you’d mess up your tonight’s hard work and you’d have to patch me up again. But don’t worry, it won’t happen ‘cause you’re going to fall in love…” Ran makes a pause and your heart cannot stop pounding. This time being able to turn his body around, the braid slipping from between your fingers, legs curling on the couch as his palms slap the backrest, long digits scraping patterns on the material while a smirk appears on his face. “In coffee, I mean.”

He’s playing with you. He’s messing with you just to gain a satisfying reaction and he knows it. Little irritating bastard.

“Oh, and can I have your tea instead of this rat’s shit? You couldn’t fuck this one up, hmm?” Ran teases you, sticking the tip of tongue out of his pressed lips. Your first reaction is to grab it and pull it out of his annoying mouth, but you take an inhale and exhale so as to calm yourself before speaking.

“Everything my dearest guest wants,” you bow a little before putting the brush on the shelf and walking up to the kitchen counter. “Gonna join you in a minute, I’ll just quickly do the dishes and cut myself a piece to match with your coffee. You can turn the TV on in the meantime, remote’s under the table.”

Spending time with Ran was a really pleasurable thing, it was impossible to get bored with him. The man, being the person that always had something to say, often being it an opinion contrary to yours, was the perfect companion to have conversations and discussions with. Constantly cracking jokes in-between the exchange of sentences, grumbling playfully about the stupid stuff that was on TV and gossiping about the neigbours, you lingered over. But it was nothing surprising since Ran really was someone who you just couldn’t get enough of, no matter how much time you’ve spent together.

“You can stay there,” you say, grabbing the chair. “It’s no problem to clean your wounds while you sit on the couch, y’know?” You laugh, as you place the seat right in front of the man, a soft smile spreaded on your tired face. You finally started getting tired, but you had to dress his cuts before you could go to sleep.

Ran nods, moving his body to the edge of the couch, giving you a better access to his damaged skin. You explore his chest with your fingertips, tracing it gently, maneuvering between the harmed spots. “Is this part of the treatment?” He hums, holding a chuckle.

“No. Just wanted to do it,” you tell silently, biting your lip as you meet his tattoo. The black ink deep soaked in his skin, being an integral part of it, adorning all of the boy’s features. Your thumb presses into the soft flesh a bit, dark painting following the dimple, merging into the right shape, and you don’t let yourself blink content with the view. Observing this phenomenon has probably become your new favourite activity, addictive in its simple shell with a hint of uniqueness. You were sure that it wasn’t something many people had access to and it filled your heart with satisfaction and happiness. “How long have you had it?” You ask, your greedy gaze still investigating his tattoo.

“Hmmm… Honestly, don’t remember. I made these a long time ago along with my brother,” he answers, stroking his flesh with a flat palm.

“Oh, so this guy I saw you with a few weeks ago is your brother? Glasses boy with blue highlights?” You query immediately, looking up at Ran. His lips are pressed, eyebrows narrowed as long lashes cover purple irises, a furrowed forehead telling you that he’s at least a bit embarrassed.

“Yeah. Didn’t really tell you I have a brother, did I?” He laughs, his fingers fidgeting with one of the braids.

“Lowkey. But it doesn’t matter, I managed to figure this one out. You only delivered me a reassurance that my theory was true.” You shrug your arms at the time that you shift your attention to the medical kit. “Let’s finish patching you up, shall we?”

“Sure,” he slaps his thighs with open palms before backing his arms up. “Ready for your wizardry again.”

As soon as Ran’s legs are spread, you move your chair closer, facilitating yourself an access to his torso. Trying to be as gentle as possible, you treat his wounds with disinfectants, starting with the ones that seem to be the least harmful. This time, you don’t try to fill the silence with your empty conversations. Both of you are visibly tired after the long night and the amount of stress or pain that ruled over your bodies. As it turned out, sitting in complete silence with the boy can also be a satisfying and comfortable activity. You communicated by exchanging short glances, with much lesser gestures, sometimes slightly raising your eyebrows or puffing out your cheeks by a bit. It was as if your souls connected at this abnormal hour, intertwining your thoughts into one.

Right before you have a chance to retreat your hand clasping a soaked cotton swab with the medicine and the blood, Ran hisses, his teeth grating painfully.

“Does it hurt?” You ask like a dumb person that you clearly are.

“Like a bitch,” Ran chuckles, and you can’t stop the tiny nervous smile forming on your face. “In addition my head’s still spinning ‘n the world’s a bit blurry. It’s pissing me off.”

“Need another break?” You look for the appropriate bandages for securing the cut as the proposal lolls out of your tongue.

“Want to get it over with. Continue,” he grunts, his head leans back and a loud exhale leaves his lungs.

“Roger that,” you salute before ghosting your finger around a big wound. It seemed to be a big deal and you really wanted to suggest the man go to a hospital with it, but also you knew that he won’t do it either way, so you quickly brushed this idea off.

In less than ten minutes you were done. Finally, after many long hours of struggling, you finished fixing this troublesome boy. With a large smile on your face you plop onto the couch next to him, another plate of the cheesecake in your hand.

“We are quite a team, huh?” Ran jokes, chugging a big glass of water at once, and he sticks his right palm for you to high five it.

“Personally, I would say that I did most of the work here, but yeah. Nice teamwork!” And a loud slap bounces off the walls of your living room.

The man seizes his opportunity, his slim fingers craftily jump in between your ones, squeezing your hand tightly. “You’d better listen carefully now, ‘cause for shit I’m not gonna repeat it, got it?” He makes you look him directly into his eyes. The purple glow embraces your whole existence tightly, closing you in a tight box, forcing you to be in this moment, in this time, only for him and for what he has to announce.

“As clear as a bell.” You answer briefly.

“Huuh-uuuh…” Ran inhales and exhales the oxygen loudly. He’s so extra, and for what, you think. “Thank you.”

A moment of silence occurs between you and the boy.

“Huh? Wait. What was it?” You stutter dumbfounded.

“I said I’m not going to repeat myself!~” His free palm soared upward as his eyelids closed, the pout on his mouth.

He’s so extra. and. for. what, you think again, not sure if the urge to laugh is stronger than the urge to strangle this boy.

“I’m begging you, please, just, consider shutting up sometimes, ‘kay?” You plead, suppressing a snort, while massaging the bridge of your nose after placing the plate on the table.

“Naaah. I think I’ll refuse,” he grins widely, pulling you by your hand closer to him. Your other palm immediately supports itself onto his naked arm, the position you are in giving Ran a perfect opportunity to look down at you. “Gotcha~,” he hums, when his face is dangerously close to yours.

It might have been cliche, might been stupid, dumb and all kind of negative adjectives too, but you felt butterflies flying in your stomach, and you couldn’t resist the fact that you liked that feeling. The distance was so short, you could have felt his hot breath blowing against the skin of your forehead. Tightening your fingers onto his palm harder, the digits of your opposite hand squeezing the flesh of his arm, you move closer towards him, and the man wastes no time, pressing his lips to your forehead.

“Hope you don’t mind it,” he mumbles into your skin, and you only shake your head in a silent negation. “That’s good.” He adds, moving his head backwards to be able to look at you.

Your eyes met, and crap, when you had previously thought his eyes were beautiful, now you were astounded how they seemed to burn in a deep fuchsia color. Heavy eyelids are half closed, silver sparkles shining in their surface, light lashes like a silk curtain over them. It felt as if you were hypnotized by his beautiful orbs, and as your faces leaned closer towards each other, the perfect bubble burst with the loud ring of Ran’s phone.

“Ya kiddin’ me?” The man snaps instantly. “Ya fuckin’ kiddin’ me?!” He desperately tries to get the phone out of his pants pocket. “Sorry, wait a sec-”

“I’ll do the dishes,” you cut him off, scratching the back of your neck as you run to the kitchen counter, ignoring the aforementioned porcelain.

“No-wait-fuck!” He slaps the couch the moment he presses the icon of a green phone. “Hello?”

While he’s arguing with someone over the phone, you are trying your best so as to calm your heartbeat that could not stop pounding. What was that?! You poured yourself a glass of water from a filter jug and ten seconds later another one. What. Was. That. Trying your best not to act like a teenager right before your first kiss, you slap your cheeks without thinking (then you proceed to pray that Ran didn’t see it), and come back to the man.

“Need to go,” he mumbles, the irritation spilling off his tongue. “The boss needs me.”

“Oh.” You blink one, two, three times, and you tilt your head to the side. “Understood.” You eye him down as he rushes straight to the front door, kneeling to put his shoes on. “Gimme a second to find you a T-shirt.”

“There’s no need,” he waves his hand and mumbles without turning to you. “I’ll pop quickly to the hideout upstairs, ‘should have some spare clothes there.”

So it is his hideout after all, huh? you think to yourself, while looking around the room, trying to figure out what you could possibly tell him. A certain metal object catches your attention.

“The cheesecake was good,” Ran blurs out, throwing the braids over his shoulders. “Bye.”

“Wait a second!” You walk towards him, waving with a long object in your hand. “I think you forgot it,” you say, handing him his baton – now cleansed of dried blood. The man opens his mouth, ready to say something, but you cut him off. “And one more thing…” Grasping his two braids in a fist, you pull his head towards you and you give a short peck on the corner of his mouth. “...you also forgot this.”

Ran stares in disbelief. Maybe it wasn’t as bad an ending to this meeting as he had thought. Cupping your cheek tenderly, he leans down and meets his lips with yours. The kiss is nothing as you imagined. It is slow and soft, the man cherishes this moment with gentle movements of his lower lip, his whole body pressed with no gap to yours, one hand nested on your hip, fingers of the other ghosting over your jaw. It wasn’t a long kiss either, but it definitely was one that will stay in your memory forever.

Ran slowly moves his face away, a slight frown on his face. “Ugh, disgusting, you taste like this shitty coffee.”

“Ugh, disgusting, you taste like a lousy little bitch.” You grin widely, pushing his chin softly so as to make him kiss you again, and the man laughs into your lips.

Shortly after he takes his baton, kissing your forehead. “Gonna be heading now. Don’t want the boss to be pissed.” His thumb strokes your cheekbone as Ran sends you a warm gaze with a hint of apology.

“Don’t forget about our meeting later today.” You playfully remind him, leaning against the wall.

“Date,” he corrects you. “Don’t forget about today's date.”

Ran leaves your house with a big grin brightening on his face as his fingertips ghosts over his mouth. Your lips are the only thing he can focus on right now; all of the fights, the pain, the blood, the misery and the death are pushed to the corner of his head. Your lips tasted like a lot of things. The sweetness of the cheesecake, the sourness of the fresh slices of an orange and the bitterness of the coffee. But most importantly, you felt like home. And it was the only taste that kept lingering on his lips for the following hours, Ran never wanting to forget it.

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cerakuro · 2 years

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I admire your art reeeeally much! Can you make a video how you draw this? I really want to know the way you start to draw and how you do the thingy with the colours ans stuff!

Thank you dir posting your arts!! :> <3

HI!!!! thank you so much for ur interest!!!! i won’t make a video but i can show u some screenshots of my wips and explain my process ^__^ sorry this took so long to answer but anyways here we go!!!!! this is all over the place im so sorry- i draw differently every time and i don’t really follow a direct process so HI

this isn’t really meant to be a tutorial by any means but rather just me rambling and documenting the different stages of my drawings. the main thing is to just have fun with it!!

in case you don’t know, i draw on procreate! i use nikko rull as my main brush to block down colours, and since i draw using my finger i basically use this as a substitute for nicer shapes since i lack any kind of pressure sensitivity. i use the drawing brush eaglehawk to do all of my lines- although depending on what im drawing and what stage im at in the drawing i’ll sometimes switch to other brushes for a softer/harder look. mainly though, i’ll use eagle hawk when im doing sketches n stuff or if i want certain shapes or details. my main blending brush is spectra! i used to use salamanca to blend but that’s kinda fallen out of use for me. but if i need more textures i’ll switch it up (for example, with the kaiba drawing i did, i blended with spectra first and then softened with the standard soft airbrush tool) below is an image i posted on my story like a year or so ago about how i create that “painted” look in some of my drawings. Note: i don’t really use any opacity layers anymore except for finishing touches- i just blot colours down from the wheel

so! let’s talk about how i actually draw my pieces. when i’m not like. just doing some quick and fun sketches i always start off using the nikko rull brush to blob down some colours in the shapes that i want on the canvas. my process is essentially to blob and then refine ^__^ i’ll be going over my portrait type pieces bc the way i do backgrounds or sketches is waaay different and both change a lot

i always start off with a general circle for the head- and i draw the body in a slightly different shade for visibility. this is honestly the easiest way for me to visualize drawings bc i am very close to having aphantasia so it’s extremely hard for me to imagine things in my head and they appear more like shapes and gestures to me ^__^

i don’t really do any sketches or like preparation beforehand like im not joking when i say i just draw and that’s as far as my planning goes. i never do proper lineart ever all of my lines are the sketches that i drew from a blank canvas. anyways in these two images u can see how the drawing starts to take form on top of the bases i already drew. i pick individual colours from the colour wheel and layer them (full opacity) over top of each other to create form. i would explain how i pick colours for my drawings but honest to god that would need it’s own separate post and most of it is just instinct. but anyways you can see in the judai drawing i kinda combined both my sketch style and painted style- like i said i don’t follow any proper way to draw

i next start to refine and blend the colours that i blocked down- adding more as needed (like if i feel a colour is getting too swallowed or i need lighting in an area, etc) i’ll sometimes do this all at once or in sections like u see in the image on the right

LASTLY IS JUST. exporting the canvas and importing it back in to draw overtop of everything on one single layer, i’ll add any effects here or adjust the colours as i see fit idk. or, in the case of that judai drawing on the right, i’ll darken things to make them more visible than the original i drew. i’m not joking when i say i draw like a painter and i didn’t even know that’s how painters draw until recently but it’s all about blobbing and then refining/blending

anyways. i can certainly say this wasn’t helpful in any way at all but i at least hope it was interesting to read ^__^ thank you again for the ask!!

#not art #asks

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i-luvsang · 3 years

Text

nct dream reaction to their s/o kissing their neck

request: none genre: fluff summary: how do the members of nct dream react when their s/o kisses their neck (in a very innocent, soft way lmao) warnings: none a/n: shfjdsjshdjd this was my first time writing a reaction, i hope y’all enjoy and that it doesn’t suck too much lol. it’s really long XD like i just got more and more carried away fksdhksd

➳ mark

well

this boi loves to kiss your shoulders

i just know it i’ve also seen it in like fifteen different posts but that’s not the point lmao

anyways, this time you wanted to try it instead

so you were hugging

and he kissed your shoulder like he usually does

and then you pressed a soft kiss on the skin where his neck meets his shoulder

to put it simply, he melted

he loved it so much, like so much, i cannot stress this enough

he pauses; in shock, but quickly recovers and hugs you even tighter

he has the the softest, most adoring little smile on his face (along with a light blush cuz he’s kinda a shy baby haha)

then i think that he’s pull away just enough to press the sweetest kiss on your lips

because that little kiss you gave him made his heart overflow with so much love that he just had to

now you both regularly kiss each other’s shoulders/neck and it’s just really cute hehdhdj

bonus: when you like actually kiss his neck (rather than shoulder) he gets so frickin soft and flustered and blushes like crazy but he really really loves it lol

➳ renjun

so he was drawing/painting like the talented artsy boy he is

and you were kinda just hanging around on the couch a few feet away

you were bored, but for the moment content with just watching him be talented and pretty

the way that his eyebrows furrowed slightly as he carefully put in the details was just so adorable

so adorable that you had to do something about it

that something entailed standing up and quietly walking up behind him

at first you just admired his art for a moment, something that he was used to you doing

but gosh he was just so endearing

so you leaned down and around, gently kissing the side of his neck

this boy froze

he could not, for the life of him, suppress the smile that started to grow on his face

his dimple popped out

and he tried not to freak out

but his blush was so evident like boi-

and again, he was just so cute, so you kissed his neck again

and this child is just about to combust because of the sheer amount of hearts and uwus inside him

so he angrily slams his drawing utensil on the table and attacks you with kisses all over your face

➳ jeno

you were snuggling with jeno on his bed

and it was already very very soft and adorable

he was laying on his back reading a book and you were like halfway on his chest

and obviously you love jeno too much for your own good

so you wanted to kiss him

but you’re also a lazy child just like me, so you settled for kissing his neck

you just tilted your head up slightly and gave his neck a cute little smooch

you could feel him tense slightly in surprise and pleasure but this little fricker pretended to keep reading his book

but you looked up at his face and his eye smile was so big that you were sure he couldn’t even see a thing, much less read the words on the pages

so you smooched his neck again and there was absolutely no way that he could resist you

he set his book aside and wrapped his arms around you, pressing the most loving big kiss on the top of your head

he gave you another kiss

and another

and a n o t h e r

because he’s fricking whipped for you and then makes you tilt your head up so he can kiss your lips too

so in case you couldn’t tell jeno liked it when you kissed his neck

➳ haechan

this little--

istg he’s gonna be the death of us all

so you were sitting next to donghyuk; both of you doing some sort of work

and you finished first, so you kinda just sat around, very bored and wanting some entertainment

of course this baby boi loves to tease you

so you were like

“i should tease him back”

by kissing his neck

and you probably knew by then, that kissing his neck would not be his loss, would not act as teasing for him, but rather would backfire on you

but like i said, you were bored and you wanted some attention, so you leaned over

and kissed his adorable little neck

this babe freezes, turns to look at you, and just smirks

“awwww my baby can’t live without my affection for just five minutes, can they?” “you know you could just ask if you want me to kiss you. no need for these obvious hints”

and of course you mentally facepalm but you knew it was coming

besides it was cute because he was actually blushing

and he would never admit it but that made him really happy and soft

he ends up pressing the sweetest kiss on your forehead before turning back to his work (that he can’t focus on bc all he can think about is how much he loves you)

➳ jaemin

so this baby hadn’t seen you in a few days

and by his texts you could tell that he really missed you (and you ofc missed him a bunch too)

so you decided to go surprise him at the company building while he was practicing

you asked renjun and jeno to help you surprise him a bit, so they made sure that he knew you weren’t coming and that he’d be there when you come

you got there safely and successfully yay and headed to the practice room that jeno told you they were in

you walked in and were very happy to see the jaemin’s back was to you

so you motioned for the boys that noticed you to be quiet and ran up to jaemin, attacking him with the biggest back hug

but THEN you decided to kiss the back of his neck

he was already dying of happiness when he felt his arms around you

and that little kiss just sent him over the edge with love and joy

he MELTED OK HE MELTED INTO YOUR ARMS

it was like all the stress and any negative emotion inside of him just melted away and he just felt so touched by that little kiss from you

especially because he’s the one who usually initiates physical affection

i think he’d actually get slightly emotional, especially if he had a hard/tiring day

is just overwhelmed with gratitude for you uwu

turns around and hugs you so tight and won’t let go of you for the rest of the week day

➳ chenle

honestly who knows what you two were doing

you were messing around with each other per usual

but you got tired lol

so you kinda just found yourselves tangled up on the ground

you were probably giggling like maniacs

and you were just so happy and in love with chenle that you had to smooch him

but like i said you were kinda just a mess of tangled up limbs

so you couldn’t reach his face

therefore, you opted to kiss his neck, which was just in reach

you gave him a big, dramatic, adorable smooch right on the front of his neck and above his collarbone

when i tell you he smiles so wide? i mean he smiles so. frickin. wide.

the biggest grin adorned his face and he lets out the loudest, happiest, most pleased laugh in the world

is really just beyond happy

he literally asks you to do it again

so obviously you do

and he freaks out again

spends like fifteen five minutes trying to get untangled from you so that he can kiss you all over and hug you into oblivion

just adores it when you kiss his neck and wants you to do it all the time

➳ jisung

so you were sitting in this baby’s lap

(which made him extremely flustered at the beginning, but once he gets used to it he actually adores having you on his lap, like idc if you’re taller or bigger than him in any way, he loves it)

you were kinda just chillin on a couch, probably both looking at your phones

it was just very soft cuz he had his arms around you and you were all curled up against him

jaemin probably walked in and threw a blanket on you, as well as took fifteen thousand pictures of you without you noticing somehow

anyways, you kinda just looked at his face and were like

“dang my boyfriend is so cute and i love him more than anything in this universe” as you should

so you were like

time to initiate some sort of other physical affection to make him extremely flustered

you’d never kissed his neck before and now was the time to do so

so you reached over and pressed a sweet, gentle kiss on the side of his neck right below his jaw

as we all expected, he f r o z e

he became a block of hecking ice idc if it was in the middle of summer tho that would make jaemin putting a blanket on you slightly odd but we can ignore that

basically he was just really flustered and a blushing mess but it most definitely makes him very happy and smiley

ok does anyone know how to fix the stupid formatting/spacing error thingy it does for bulleted stuff that it does in the app?? lol

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chiro-asuta-vulpes · 2 years

Text

Greetings my lil, angels. FIRST of all I would like to thank everyone for all your support, likes and shares of my work also appreciating my baby girl Snowy, and my other characters. THANK YOU THANK YOU EVERYONEEEEE FOR ALL YOUR UNDYING LOVE AND SUPPORT☺️💙💙💙🌼🌼✨✨✨✨

Second, I wanna apologize if I took so long on MAKING AND FINISHING MY THANK YOU ART GIFTS, to you all sweeties,

🔔REASONS📣

ONE: There are some times delays because of me attending my college degree classes, also homework, projects, online classes etc.📱🖥💻

SECOND: Whenever I had new ideas popping on my head I immediately draw them📱🎨🖌 and I had a hard time to finish and focus on one art whenever new ideas comes to pierce thru my mind and beg me to draw it I do so📘🖋 hehehehehehe yea, AND YES I admit there are times I have tons of ideas EITHER RELATING TO MY OC OR ANY CHARACTERS, I wish to drew depending on the ideas i come up in my head but struggling to rush and note up before i forgot huhuhu yeaaa, IM SUCHHHH A MESSSSSS! Agghhhhh! 🥺😓😭

Uggghhh this is soooo embarrassing i get distracted sooooo easily😖😞😭

ANYWAYS rn I'm focusing on WORKING ANOTHER SNOWY ART ART, once I Get Snow Snow done I might probably go back to MAKING MORE THANK YOU GIFT ART ART AND ART COLLABS ART, if I say I promise to draw your character IM SERIOUS ON THAT I WILL DRAW IT, I just feel bad on my behavior of being ALWAYS DISTRACTED and I feel bad about it too....😰😢🥺😭

Vent Out....) (Don't worry I'm okay..this is just a thought...also stuffs been happening and bothering my brain a lot)

If you all angry or disappointed onto me for being distractive and not making your OCS in time well you all have the right to do so..and yeaaaa I'm not gonna argue on that if you all are...😓😓😔

Again..IM NOT A ROBOT LIKE SNOWY that helps and up all day, I'm a human..I have stuffs too and I if you all want art don't rush me be patient and maybe instead of darting me or rush me maybe a encouragement and support will do to help me motivated to draw although if not well might as well give up...

I have been having this issues for 2 years and one of the reasons Im scared to share my stuffs bc I fear JUDGY PEOPLE AND TOXIC PEOPLE, I maybe old but i have feelings too....such as Anxiety, Art Block, Trauma, Stress, Depression, Insomnia, Mental Abuse by a few IRL people here in IRL, Guilt trip, Emotional Scars, Etc.

Reason why I made Snowy as a enjoyment for me to do and make to escape this CRUEL FEELINGS and CRUEL REALITY I'm having in life, whenever I drew people's characters and my ocs I feel free....secure and safe...also put a smile on to my face.

I have been all over other medias and ended up being judged by my oc telling me they're waaayyyy off! And IM SICK OF ITTT!

I don't want that to happened, I already had a massive trauma about it

The reason why I was on tumblr because I was so tired being in another media of people judging my work, I was trying to run away from them...

Now things changed now I'm happy to be here in Tumblr... I met many people finally UNDERSTANDS, APPRECIATE, LOVE, AND ADORE my work... Even I'm not yet good enough.

I felt free and I feel I'm home in this site. I wish to stay here AS LONG AS I STILL LIVE,

I have an illness that I carry within my health IRL and I don't wanna tell because I don't wish to worry you all my little angels... 😣😞😢

BUT DONT WORRY I'm okay i have been having checkups and I been taking medications and being careful and still FIGHTING on surviving☺️💙🌼✨✨

If all your life's are stressing u all bc of being busy and school all i can say is no matter how many times u all tumble down, you all should always rise up never give up continue and always remember and strive for that dream and desires you all wish for ur future...youre all directors and maker of your own path and destinies, and no matter how cruel our world is but there is always a new beginning...and start and it's okay to cry feel hurt it's part of the challenges and trials in life...but we're all still here standing and surviving.

IM VERY proud of you all and sooo happy for everyone's achievements and goals u all did irl keep going onward...embrace your future and continue to dream strive and always stay the real you, don't ever give up, embrace your talents and gifts, and keep smiling.

THATS ALL FOR NOW YOU SWEETIES HAVE A BEAUTIFUL WONDERFUL DAAAYYYY OVERRR THEREEEE! I LOVE YOUUUU ALLL AND THANKS FOR READING..📘📄📄🖋💙💙✨✨✨✨✨✨

💙 JANE

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gremlin-writes-angst · 3 years

Note

Hii!! Can I please request a matchup for your birthday event? (Happy birthday by the way!!!)

For BNHA please💕 (my favorite characters are shigaraki, aizawa, shinso, tamaki, and I just like them all)

I’m a Capricorn sun (cancer moon and libra rising) I have brown eyes and blonde hair (bleached) i’m 5’6 with a slim build. I love art like drawing and painting, art history, and baking! & actually majoring in biomedical engineering lol.

I absolutely love to hang out with my friends and being spontaneous like just going out for coffee (im addicted to Starbucks and I’m lactose intolerant lol) or to a museum or just talking. I HATE bugs and I cry if one is ever near me lol.

I’m very empathetic and always trying to lighten the mood and make people happy. I’m very chill and don’t have problems with anyone (unless they’re rude or mean to me or my friends) I can’t stand people who are rude or think they’re better than everyone. I’m super indecisive and need a lot of validation. I also have a bad habit of ripping the skin off my fingers like literally until they bleed😭i’ve been told i have chaotic energy lol

I’m b l i n d so always wearing my glasses haha also I love having a sense of humor. I also have anxiety and can be way too emotional sometimes. I’m an ENFP & also I love tie dye clothes, makeup, and everything pastel.

My love language is probably receiving/giving gifts and words of affirmation. I absolutely love picking out little gifts for people and randomly giving them things that remind me of them. And when people do that for me I just love it! I can’t think of a specific favorite memory but like just over the summer after high school, hanging with friends at like 2 am in a parking lot or a McDonalds drive thru and just having no care in the world- those memories are my favorite

My ideal date would probably be going out to eat, and to a museum or an aquarium or something fun that we can explore. I also love just going to the mall and walking around and I might be addicted to shopping. I really don’t like to be outside too much bc of the bugs so no hiking or camping or anything like that.

Im sorry if this is too long, thank you so much!!!💖💖

For MHA I match you with Shouta Aizawa

Matching you was pretty easy because I just took from your list and picked you I thought would be best for you romantically based on what you submitted. I choose Aizawa because he is a very caring person in his way and he would be good for you. I think he would also be protective of you, whether, against yourself or others, he stops you from peeling your fingers, and blocks you from the view of bugs/or kills them.

Date story

You and your husband were on a replica date, replicating the two of your guy’s first dates. Mcdonalds and a walk around an aquarium. You remember it quite well, it was the first time you saw him nervous, apologizing for everything, but at the end of the night, you could see in the reflection of glass that he had relaxed and had a soft smile aimed at you.

You finished the McDonalds dinner and were now at the aquarium. The two of you walked around looking at the aquatic life that you had seen multiple times before. About to leave the sea turtle section when you feel your husband’s hand around your wrist. He pulled you back, now facing each other. His hand moved from your wrist to your hand and pulled it up to his mouth giving multiple small kisses on the back of your hand. It was a habit of his when he caught you ripping at your fingernails.

He looked up and into your eyes.

“you’re forgetting something.”

He said in a teasing tone, but you truly forgot. And he could see that in your eyes so he dropped the teasing tone.

“We had our first kiss here.”

His voice was now filled with love. You felt stupid for forgetting, but he pulled you in and kissed you, and made you feel a lot better.

The date ended as it usually did, at the gift shop. You looked around for a gift for Aizawa, you would normally find something cat-related but at an aquarium gift shop, you ended up with a key chain with a flat sea turtles charm on it.

When you meet up with Aizawa outside by the car the two of you put up a little act, showing each other the gifts and acting surprised that they got you something. This time he gave you a keychain with a sea turtle, but unlike what you got him this keychain had a plush turtle instead of a hard piece of plastic. You two both enjoyed your new gifts and new memories.

Thank you for submitting, hope you enjoy!!!

My birthday event is closed, sorry.

#mha #aizawa shouta #match ups #birthday event

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selfcareparker · 3 years

Note

okay fghsgdj yes you can say girl ! my pronouns are she/her :) okay but fr pause, i read this like 3 minutes after you posted it (or at least my notif said 3mins lmao) bUT IM IN BED AND I USUALLY HAVE MY COMPUTER OPEN WITH YOUR RESPONSE SO I MAKE SURE I ADDRESS EVERYTHING AND THEN SEND IN THE ASK ON MY PHONE HDGSJSH anyway, time to get my ass up 😔 but wait i find you so funny like honestly, reading that cracked me all the way up. and i feel the “lol” thing so hard!!!! idk why i do it all the time (i’m tryna stop) but i’ll say something with lol at the beginning and lol at the end... it might be a defense mechanism at this point lol (😔) AND (i need to stop with the uppercase too it’s not funny anymore) I DONT KNOW WHY I LAUGHED SO HARD JDHSK WHEN YOU SAID ALSO AGAIN HAHAHAH LIKE UR HAHHAH also my sleep schedule is not pretty either lmao but i’m homeschooled so i never have to get up for anything? hhdhsis idk but i’m glad you slept!! you need sleep!!

also (pls no i cannot) why did i not know what ykwim meant until i reread this?? like it makes so much sense- anyway! i think it’s so cool that you’re excited for university! idk why but i do lol like you’re getting ready for the future (masters degree and all that) & you’re (maybe) going to england anyway so that’s cool haha (hopefully when you go you can see your relatives 🤞🏾)

the fact that you get happy seeing my asks i- 💓💓

you make me wanna go to London & England so bad urghhhh like i’ve only been out of the country once (to Canada for a family reunion) but it sounds so prettyyyyy & i’m so sorry that cov*d is messing everything up and i hope you can see your relatives soon :(

now to address the whole english speaking/writing: I FIND THAT SO WEIRD DUHSKSJ i don’t know how an english speaking person could say that if you don’t write it 100% grammatically correct.... that it’s wrong? when literally, over here at least, WE’RE SO GRAMMATICALLY INCORRECT HAHHAAH in both the way we talk and write!! and lol you’re welcome,, AND THE PARAGRAPH DID MAKE SENSE HDHSJSH & your rant is fine because... that is actually a bit ??? bc no one writes with 100% grammar lol

OH MY GOSH (see this uppercase thing is addictive) YOU STUDIED LATIN FOR 6 YEARS??? that’s really cool 🥺 the way that you know/speak 3+ languages i- NOT EVEN 3+ LIKE 6+ (german, english, latin, french, serbian, italian, and everything that comes with latin lmao) even if it’s just a tiny bit like wowee. it is really fascinating!!! i had the opportunity to take latin and i... didnt. i took art instead BUT ONLY CUZ MY FRIENDS WERE IN THAT CLASS AND ART LOOKED FUN IM SORRY

PLEASE WHY DO YOU KNOW EVERYONE?? that sounds so fricking cool tell your mom (mum or mama it’s really fine lol) that she sounds awesome. i think Jamaica would be fun either way!! i mean it looks pretty from pictures? i was a baby so i honestly have no recollection hahaha

LMAOO NOT U SAYING THIS IS LONGER THAN SOME OF MY FICS- PLEASE GIRL IM TELLING YOU I VERBALLY LAUGHED HAHAHAHAHAH but yea you really don’t need to apologize i like reading everything you say 🥺 HDKSHS AND UR FINE WE WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT ME BEFORE uhhh hmm uhh lemme think i, well, i saw chaos walking yesterday (big tom holland fan over here) and it was alright.. my mom acted a fool at all the jump scares LMAO but it was funny... since i’m talking about movies (this is hella random i know) but i like shark movies HDKJSSJ my favorite is the meg (it’s so good ohmigosh) and the 47 meters down movies aren’t bad either... i have two younger brothers... iiiii AM IN LOVE WITH MUSIC PHEW anddd i’m homeschooled (i think i mentioned that lol) i think that’s a good amount ahahaha AND IM HUNGRY RN JDHSJ

now. please. let me address the edit. i just want you to know that.. when i talk about your fics and i finish them and everything i’m not looking for more? like obviously if you’re writing i’m gonna read it but you don’t need to feel pressured or anything (idk if you do) to put more fics out lol like they’re great and i’m just sending the praise bc i love the ones that are there :’) but i’m so happy you’re working through your writers block!!! yay so so happy for you!!! and PUHLEASE anything you write is fantastic, i feel the exact same way when i write but girl. you’re fine. it’s gonna be great. (idk if this made any sense but... okay)

(and my cousin calls her mom mama so it’s really okay hahah i even call my mom mama sometimes) (and where you got the number “16 sentences” beats me but i still cracked up) (is this me pretending i had tags? maybe) HAHAHAHA OK BYE ❤️❤️ why did this take me so long to send i have no clue, AND WHY AM I OVERTHINKING EVERYTHING I SAID SHAJSHSJ ANYWAY BYE btw i love us too... like iconic // lovely anon 💓

me reading this:

also the dedication you put into sending me stuff— like with the laptop and phone and ahsksk 🥺🥺🥺

i’ll update you when i’ve started uni btw, i’m getting more and more excited every single day haha but i still have 3 weeks until it starts and even then I’ll obviously have to get used to it and everything, but you’re making me even more excited about it sksjshsg

yeah i wanna go to england too dkshsh let’s be sad together over the fact the we can’t travel eksjsh😔😭 but hopefully the wait will make it even better in the end <33 also i talk to loads of relatives over the phone at least once a week so it’s not too bad for me! but i miss their house 😭lmao

and i knowww snshsh so many native english speakers just make so many mistakes— and obviously i get that some things are slang but some things are simply wrong ajsh, the thing is no one has ever told me that my english is bad (i know it’s not bad anyway, but i’m still insecure) or no one has ever pointed out any mistakes, but yeah it’s mostly just insecurity dkshsg but yes thanks for saying what you said (previously as well as in this ask)😌🥰

Okay now for latin— girlll i don’t blame u for choosing art over latin esp. when all of your friends are doing art as well!! I’d choose art over latin as well lol skshsg but in year 6 we had to choose between latin and french, and at the time i didn’t like french? which was dumb of me and now i wanna learn french ekdhs but i don’t regret choosing latin at all bc if i properly learn french one day then i’ll already know understand loads of stuff (or at least some stuff lol) just thanks to latin 😌😌 but still, art>>>latin skskshshgs

I wanna watch chaos walking too!!! But i don’t get when/where/how it’s out lmao, cinemas are still closed here so i’ll either have to wait or find it somewhere online... il*egally 🥰 i don’t have high expectations at all btw but i like daisy and tom and the dog🥺 so i think i’ll enjoy it

GIRL SHARK FILMS SHARK FOLMS SKSJSHSHS okay so there are a few classics i haven’t watched yet, and also a few new ones that i haven’t seen yet BUT I LOVE SHARK FILMS SO MUCH SKSHSGSGSKK the first like proper shark film i ever watched was the shallows (which i like but my brain is still too small to comprehend what happened at the end (i mean i get it but i just can’t imagine it— idek if you’ve seen the film but skshhs)) and after watching it three times it does get a bit boring (but now whenever i see pictures or videos of big waves i’m just waiting for a shark to show up like come ON SKSJSG

^^^that pic/scene really traumatised me sksjsh but i still like the film

I only watched jaws like a few months ago, and i get that it’s a classic and also that it’s old and they just didn’t have the best.. equipment or special effects or whatever but i mean... look at meg and then look at jaws.... no disrespect to jaws at ALL but the meg is so much cooler. (That one scene on the boat where the shark just JUMPS OUT OF THE WATER AND SKSJSHHSUSJHA i get such a shock every time it’s so good (and the dog aww aksjshssli 🥺🥺🥰 and the boy with the ice cream lmao he’s iconic)

47 metres down, wow, i liked that film too. (i’ve only watched the original/first one i think) i mean that is such a fucking nightmare scenario like ALSJDHSNEMSKDJSHSJSKWBALSODUEWBSLDKHDJSNSKSKSHSGEBWKAISGSHEKEKSKLDJDJDHDHSHAGGA (that’s the best way i can express my feelings about that scenario lmao)

oh and i’ve recently been watching more horror films but i don’t know if they’re for me... I like the thrill and whatever but i just end up being scared for my life when i have to go to the bathroom at night or when i’m trying to sleep bc suddenly my mind is flooded with all the scary shit from the films 💀💀💀

and music i mean... you know those people who just don’t listen to music? WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM???? i honestly like all genres especially in the last year, i am IN LOVE with Nicki Minaj + Megan andddd Stormzy and i like Harry Styles but i prefer his first solo album (and obviously one direction has bangers i have a throwback 1D session at least once a month), I also love MGK especially his new stuff and otherwise i mostly listen to german artists lmao. So who do you like?💖 (WHY DO I FEEL LIKE YOURE GONNA SAY SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT SKAHAGUS IF YOU LISTEN TO COMPLETELY DIFFERENT MUSIC DONT JUDGE ME AJSHDJS) (i know you’re not gonna judge me but)

++ @ the thing you said about writing, don’t worry, i don’t feel pressured at all!!! (not by you and not by anybody else.. except myself sometimes lol) and i’m just very happy that you liked my fics 🥰🥰🥰 and if i start telling people that i’m writing a fic then sometimes it puts a bit of (healthy) pressure on me. like yes sometimes it really is writer’s block, but sometimes i really am just lazy ddkshhd so now that i’ve told you i’m writing a fic i might get my ass up quicker than i would if i hadn’t told anyone 😌😌😌

#ok i wrote some if this on the tube/on the bus/at the dentist/in bed so if this seems like it’s all over the place #that’s bc i was literally all over the place skshg #*of #also i love how you used tags skajahsg #lovely anon #<3 #sorry if some of the sentences didn‘t make sense or were too fucking long i wrote half of this half asleep #and i know i dont have to apologise but still like no one should have to read all my page long sentences that arent even proper sentencesskk

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