#it's their chance to bring back lexa

[butmakeitgayblog]

I think your understanding of canon Clexa and their characterization/dynamics is really spot on, which makes me really excited to read your canon story. The ask about canon Clarke being Loud made me wonder what your take would be on how their first time went? It’s obviously a scene that’s been written in fanfic a ton but since you seem to be against the typical “heda got fucked into a nap” narrative I’d love to know what the version of events is in your head?

Oh no, I do believe Lexa got fucked into a nap 😂

I just don't believe that was all that happened, nor that it happened the way a lot of people think 👀

Sorry in advance for the rant.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: I don't agree with some people's fandom interpretation of Lexa being this ultimately hesitant/demure or reserved person. At least not when it comes to how she expresses herself romantically. Now, I'm not shitting on the people who do see her like that and have written her like that for canon by any means because it's certainly understandable given the way she carries herself overall. I do get it.

But to me at least, Lexa is not a reserved person. Not when she's interested in someone. Not romantically, and certainly not physically.

From the very second she decided she was going to go for what she wanted with Clarke - when she decided to be honest and active about her feelings - what did she do? How did she behave?

Well. She took the reins and kissed Clarke exactly how she'd been wanting to kiss her for days

She took command and pushed into the feel of it and chased Clarke's lips to stretch the moment as long as she could

Yes she backed off when Clarke pulled away and said not yet, but that doesn't negate the fact that she very much did exactly what she wanted to do. That doesn't negate the fact that Lexa slipped her hand through Clarke's hair and tugged her in by the neck and kissed the living shit out of her simply because she wanted to.

Now here's where things get jumbled up imo and where people kind of... lose sight of Lexa for who she is. Because after this comes the mountain and then the subsequent betrayal, and after that Lexa is left hanging in this weird love/hate limbo (Clarke's, not hers. Obviously.) Was Lexa reserved during that time? Yes. Because she was trying to be respectful. She assumed Clarked hated her and would probably never forgive her. She felt she'd already done enough damage to ruin any hope for a relationship between them, so all that was left was to be respectful and love Clarke from afar. (That's glossing over many instances of Lexa still, STILL, showing her affections outright i.e. touching her when Emerson charged at her, the vow, showing up to Clarke's room dressed like a harlot a relaxed woman who just happened to like showing a whole lotta leg. You get it)

Which brings us to the afternoon Clarke was going to leave, and my God the girl was devastated. She was holding it together because that's what Lexa's does. Because Lexa was used to losing everyone she ever cared about. That's just how her life went. But also she was trying her best to keep it all together for Clarke's sake. To not make the decision of going back to Arkadia any harder for her than she knew it already was.

But even then, even in her facade of strength for both of their sake, Lexa still gave in and showed Clarke the crack in her armor. Lexa was methodical in everything shw did, and yet still she let slip, "That's why I...". Because she knew. She knew Clarke would understand what she was saying even when she wasn't ready to actually hear it. She let it "slip" because if that was going to be the last time they were together, she needed to at least know that she'd put it out there. That Clarke could carry that with her forever, if she chose to.

And then Clarke fucking kissed her.

Not once, but twice. Lexa gave her a chance to pull and think it over because of how shaky everything still was, but then Clarke leaned in and kissed her again.

And Lexa didn't hesitate again for one goddamn second after that.

Instead she kissed Clarke deeper than she'd kissed her before. Ran nervous hands all over her and caressed at her wherever she could.

She held Clarke close and actually tasted her with all the hunger she'd been pushing down for weeks (whew, thank you Alycia😮‍💨🫦).

She quite literally took Clarke's hands and tugged her to her bed. Like??? Heda really said through body language "oh we are going to fuck" (but... sweeter)

Yes she was patient and gave Clarke a chance to say no because, again, she was still very aware of how tenuous this seeming forgiveness probably was in Clarke's eyes. But that doesn't change the fact that she made it clear what she wanted. She put her affection and her yearning - all of her vulnerability right out there for Clarke to take or leave, and she did it in way that there was no mistaking exactly what she was asking for.

But Clarke didn't pull away, and what did Lexa do?

She grabbed her again. She pushed their intimacy forward again. She tugged Clarke down to the bed and not only gave herself to Clarke, but also took everything she had wanted.

So you see, Lexa was never passive in her expressions of attraction toward Clarke. She was never truly hesitant when it came to physically going for what she wanted when it came to wanting to be intimate with her. She kissed Clarke and she touched Clarke and she reached out for her time and again without shame, only stopping herself when Clarke put a stop to things because Lexa would never take something Clarke didn't openly give.

Which makes me believe Lexa would've been even less reserved when she was finally, finally, allowed to do all the things she'd yearned for. Yes she'd given Clarke the control to begin with because they both needed that kind of reassurance in their intimacy, but afterward? When it was Lexa's turn to show Clarke exactly how much she wanted her?

I believe Lexa would've been exactly who she always was when it came to being in love: giving and expressive, unabashed in her naked want. I think she would've kissed Clarke until their mouths ached and tasted every drop Clarke had to give. I think she would've begged Clarke to moan for her just so she could have those memories of making her lose control to keep with her forever. I think she would've fucked Clarke like it was their first and last time all rolled into one, because as far Lexa knew, that's exactly what it was. I think she would've teased her just to see Clarke smile and then teased her just to hear her whine. I think she would've done everything to stretch the afternoon out even while knowing they were racing against the clock. And I don't think she would've felt hesitant about any of it. Not about giving herself entirely to Clarke, both dominantly and submissively.

Cuz yeah Miss Lexa was a very happy camper after round one

But she sure as hell still wasn't shy about having her own turn

#anon #clexa #lexa kom trikru #clarke griffin #idk if this is what you were looking for but I inevitably go on rants when I answer canon asks before bed 🥴😬 #and yeah I do touch on what happened that afternoon in my canon fic 👀 #to be posted on an ao3 near you soon... ish

[heda-in-the-clouds]

Hold me close, sway me more

Modern au where Clarke and Lexa meet in a club

Read below for my unedited ficlet I wrote after watching Emily, Alycia's character in Saint X, dancing in the club

----

Anya convinced her nerdy roommate Lexa that she needed to loosen up and have fun socializing with other people at least once in college instead of staying home alone and watching her nature documentaries on a Friday night. She persuaded Lexa to go out dancing with her at the club close to campus

Lexa begrudgingly agreed on the condition that Anya would bring her home if she wasn't having fun after one hour. Before Lexa could change her mind, Anya immediately dragged her from the couch and pushed her out the door. Lexa wasn't even given the chance to change her clothes. She was still wearing her sweats and an old national park shirt in contrast to Anya who wore a black bodycon dress and heels

As soon as they entered the club, Lexa's eyes and ears were assaulted by the bright strobe lights and loud music blaring from the speakers. It was intense and awkward for Lexa who immediately felt out of her element. Before she could take a moment to compose herself, Anya pulled her to the bar and ordered them a round of shots.

Lexa had never been a fan of drinking so she eyed the clear liquid apprehensively. Anya encouraged Lexa to stop thinking and just drink claiming she needed some liquid courage in order to loosen up.

The roommates toasted their glasses and downed their first shot. Lexa grimaced as the vodka burned her throat. She was still coughing when Anya handed her the next shot and gestured "Bottoms up." She glared at her roommate as she downed her second shot.

Shortly afterwards, Lexa suddenly felt relaxed and giddy. She even sensed her inhibitions disappearing and replaced with a carefree attitude. She basked as a euphoric buzz flowed through her head. Anya was right. She actually felt more confident in herself

She's snapped out of her stupor by Anya waving her hand in front of her. She told her that it was time for her to show off her dance moves. She then dragged Lexa and led them to the center of the dancefloor.

At first, Lexa felt awkward as she stood still while the throes of bodies moved all around her. She felt self conscious since she didn't know how to dance. Sensing Lexa's discomfort, Anya gestured to copy her moves so Lexa watched her roommate moving freely to the beat.

Lexa played off her energy and movements. She tentatively bounced her body and swung her arms to match the song's beat. Her feet shuffled to coordinate her shaky movements. It felt unnatural to Lexa, so she looked to Anya for approval. Anya nodded and told her she looked good. Anya added that she needed to get out of her head and just feel the music

Lexa's confidence grew after Anya's reassurance and went with her advice. She stopped thinking about how to move and just focused on feeling the music guiding her movements. She was surprised by how easily she could dance when she let the beats flow through her body. Soon, Lexa was jumping and waving her hands in the air. Her feet glided across the floor to match the song's tempo. She even rocked her hips back and forth as she bobbed her head to the beat.

Lexa was having the time of her life in the club. She didn't care that she was surrounded by sweaty bodies or if her dance moves looked awkward. She swore that she never felt this free and relaxed in her life before. It was a feeling that Lexa did not want to let go so she closed her eyes and just danced

From across the dancefloor, Clarke watched Lexa. She was drawn to this girl who looked so out of place in the club. For one, she's wore sweats, a simple t-shirt, and sneakers instead of a slutty dress and heels like everyone else. Second, her dance moves were simply put, terrible and uncoordinated. However, she looked so cute that Clarke could not resist approaching her hoping to score a dance

When Lexa opened her eyes, she didn't see Anya in front of her. Instead, she was suddenly face to face with the bluest eyes she had ever seen. She instinctively looked away feeling embarrassed staring so openly at a stranger. Lexa had never been approached by anyone in her life before let alone someone as beautiful as this blonde bombshell in front of her.

However when she looked back, those same blue eyes were still on her. This time, they were accompanied by a sultry smile. She was saying something but Lexa could barely hear her over the loud music blasting from the speakers. Resorting to reading the blonde's soft lips, she caught the ask "wanna dance?"

Lexa felt a strong rush of confidence flowing through her that this goddess wanted to dance with her. She pulled the blonde closer and guided her hands over her ass to take the lead. The blonde surprised Lexa and tugged her even closer until their bodies were flush. She then possessively guided Lexa's body so they were rocking and swaying with the beat.

Lexa had never been held like this by anyone else before. She loved the pressure and warmth of another person on her. It made her feel desired. She felt her core heating up the longer they danced together. She looked up and found her partner's blue eyes have darkened. Lexa clearly wasn't the only one feeling the same

Fueled by her lust, Lexa turned around, pressed her ass backwards into the blonde, and grinded across her crotch. She grabbed the blonde's hands and encouraged her to feel her body over her clothes. She begged the blonde to ravish her neck with kisses. Lexa was moaning as the blonde explored and played with her body

Clarke was shocked by this girl's confidence and didn't expect her nerd to transform into a vixen in front of her. She felt apprehensive about feeling this girl until she guided Clarke's hands to roam across her body. With her consent, Clarke could not stop her exploration of her lithe body. She squeezed the girl's breasts and pinched her hardened peaks over her shirt. She left open mouthed kisses along her shoulder and neck. She dug her hands into the girl's hips and pushed her ass against her front to alleviate the throbbing in her core.

Clarke knew she had to take this girl back home. Before she could whisper the words "Wanna get out of here?", the girl was suddenly pulled out of her hold by a furious looking woman. Clarke recognized the woman as Anya and cursed.

Seeing Lexa happily dancing, Anya felt confident enough to give her some space to enjoy herself. She rarely saw Lexa looking so carefree and relaxed. It was a good look on her. Plus, Anya felt the soothing buzz of their shots starting to wear off so she headed to the bar for another round.

When she returned, she seethed at Lexa's new dance partner. It was Clarke Griffin, known player who left a trail of broken hearts behind her each week. She felt a wave of protectiveness wash over her for Lexa. She did not want to see Lexa become another notch on Griffin's bedpost. She marched over to end their time together before things could escalate any further

As Lexa danced with her blonde, she craved more. The kisses, hands, and warmth across her body wasn't enough. Lexa wanted to be fully enveloped and surrounded by her. She wanted to transcend to a new level of euphoria, one that she hasn't experienced yet. Lexa wanted to sleep with her.

Before Lexa could beg the blonde to take her home, she yelped when she was suddenly yanked out of the warm comfort of the blonde's embrace. It was Anya telling Lexa they needed to leave now. It was an emergency.

Lexa quickly looked back at the blonde hoping to apologize for her abrupt exit. She saw a somber look on her face. Lexa shouted out, "I'm Lexa. I hope we can dance again" before she disappeared out of sight.

Clarke was left alone on the dancefloor as she watched Anya take Lexa away from her. Clarke knew she wouldn't be able to see let alone dance with Lexa again with Anya in the picture. She knew her history as a player since she broke Niylah's heart, one of Anya's closest friends

Once they were out of the club, Lexa smacked Anya's hand away and demanded to know why they were leaving so soon. She was having a good time dancing with someone.

Anya told Lexa she did this for her own good. She told Lexa about Clarke Griffin's notoriety on campus as a player. She did not want to see Lexa's heart get broken. She deserved better than becoming another one of Griffin's conquests

"Promise me you won't see Griffin again. She's bad for you Lexa." Anya pleaded.

"Yes, yes. Fine, I promise. I won't see her again." Lexa grumbled

However when Lexa dreamed that night, she danced with the girl with golden locks and ocean eyes

#hope you guys like it #should i continue? #i remember clarke went dancing in season 6 and the clips fit perfectly with Emily's scenes #clexa #clexa au #rory's stuff #my writing #rory's fic #club au #clexa club au

[lexa-griffins]

Dilf Clarke takes her son to the pool for swimming lessons. She didn't expect his new instructor, Lexa, to be so beautiful. It doesn't help that Lexa wears a swimsuit that accentuates her curves especially her ass. Clarke tries to keep a respectful gaze as Lexa teaches her son but her glance always strays to Lexa's cleavage, hips, or ass in her tight swimsuit. Once practice is over, Clarke thanks Lexa. Lexa flirts with Clarke openly since she saw her checking her body out multiple times during the lesson. Gaining courage, Clarke asks Lexa if she also does adult swimming lessons. She could always improve her form and technique. Lexa says yes and she wouldn't mind helping Clarke with her "strokes" during a one-on-one private lesson

!!!!!! Oh oh oh 👀👀👀👀

Jack has been BEGGING to take swimming lessons. He still can't swim like his cousins can and Clarke can honestly barely swim too so she is definitely not the prime teacher for thia. So, swimming lessons it is, even if they cost so fucking much.

She's not expecting to have a good time. She's expecting to be bored and scared out of her mind for her little boy on the water.

Any of those seemingly awful feelings are absolutely gone the moment she hears the cheerful "Good morning class." She read the panflect, she knows the teacher is a competitive swimmer and someone who has life guard training. She knows she's youngerish, mid 20s she believes, but somehow she did not expect /her/. She introduces herself to the parents and the class as Lexa and unfortunately Clarke doesn't catch much other than that. The swimsuit is as basic as they come and yet this woman seems to make it look like high fashion lingerie, with the way it clings to her hips and lifts her chest and if Clarke so much as thinks about how it all but disappears beyween her cheeks she's gonna get in trouble.

It is only luck that her kid seems to find himself so famn attatched to Lexa during the whole class, giving Clarke an excuse to look at all while making sure her little boy is alright.

The lesson is short, as most of the kids can barely get in the water at this stage without needing Lexa's full attention. Jack seems to not want to let go of her at all.

It starts there really. How clearly Jack feels sage around Lexa, always the one to go and hug her first, clingning to her despite being a fast learned. This means Clarke and Lexa talk a lot more. /Flirt/ a lot more.

"He's like a little fish! Look at him go!"

"He seems to have taken quite the liling for the water. He's a very smart boy Clarke, you should be proud."

"Oh believe me, I am. I can't even step in the water without feeling like I'm drowning. Maybe i need some basic lessons too."

That, that right there was the magic word.

Because Lexa suggests giving her some classes. And Clarke accepts it.

It is almost embarrassing for Clarke, splashing around the pool at her big age without knowing how to swim. But it also shows her why the kids love Lexa so much, how patience and helpful she is.

Its in the locker room after their second lesson that it happens. Because Clarke cannot stop staring at the way Lexa's wet bathing suit clings to her, her drying hair curling more and more, the droplets of water dripping for its ends and making their way down her back and the curve of her ass. She knows Lexa stares too. Clarke made a point of choosing a swimsuit that is more than generous with her cleavage and knows the swimming shorts do accentuate her crotch.

They are crashing against the lockers before the other has a chance to say anything. They reek of chlorine, but neither care. Clarke lifts Lexa without struggle, pulling long legs around her shoulders, forcing Lexa against the lockers. Some adjusting is nedded to free her dick from the bathing suit, while Lexa's is easily pushed to the side ao she can enter her.

Its desperate and fast, and still Lexa has the time to bring the top of Clarke swimming suit down, freeing her tits from the small cage they were in. Clarke palms Lexa's ass, finally satisfying the impulsive desire to keep her hands there.

It lasts so little that Clarke almost wants to cry when she feels her balls tighten. Lexa grabs her by the back of her neck and crashes their lips together, seemingly finding no discomfort in her squished position as Clarke cums inside of her.

They stand there for a minute. Clarke's dick softening, her chest out as Lexa breathes heavily, eyes close and head against the locker, a satisfied smile on her face. Clarke is careful to help her down, a "wow" leaving her as Lexa nearly falls once her feet touch the ground, Clarke's arms around her waist to keep her steady.

Lexa looks at her with a genuine smile, happiness clear as day in her arms. Clarke knew Lexa had somewhat of an attraction to her, but it wasn't until just now that she realized just how big of a crush the younger girl truly had on her.

That surely complicates things.

#letter opened #wanheda's dagger #i adore the premise but i didnt do it justice!!! #but!!! there i love mom clarke just drooling over swim instructor lexa 🤤

[dragynkeep]

apparently it was Raven who wanted Clarke to make the fucking list... I cannot stress this enough fuck Raven where was she when the list was found? i remember her being fucking nowhere nearby (or worse seeing what happens and just leaving Clarke to deal with it) and fucking Jaha convinced the mob to stand down

still fucking mad that Josephine didn't get a chance to go toe to toe with Raven and obliterate her (knowing Josephine she would probably bring up a lot of shit that happens in the first episode of season five like Clarke holding a gun to her head)

yeah, clarke was expressing concern & obviously trying not to focus always on the fact that she has to choose out of hundreds which 80 will live: & raven immediately bit back with that cunty attitude of hers that she'll fix the ark but clarke decides who lives & who dies.

which absolutely stemmed from clarke killing finn & the actions in mount weather, as well as all that happened in s3 which is so fucked up. clarke at this point has, at multiple instances, had to do the worst things imaginable to keep her friends alive including raven. she killed finn because she had no choice. mount weather was either kill them or watch her own mother be killed after they had also tortured raven for her blood marrow. in the last season she had literally lost lexa & was tortured, as well as nearly dying to keep all of them alive yet again.

meanwhile raven throughout all of these instances has tried to either make the worse choice ever (finn) or seems to forget that clarke is the reason she's even still alive to bitch at her.

in this exact episode, she's having the same dilemma with adria & luna, in clarke's exact position, & there's still no leniency towards clarke. it' infuriates me because clarke has always been the one to extend the olive branch to raven while raven spits in her face or assaults her.

watching jo!clarke tear raven apart in all her sanctimonious hypocrisy would've been so good to see because josephine is exactly what raven tries to paint clarke as. someone who revels in having that power over others, literally deciding who dies for her & which body she'll have next, & raven getting to see that would've been amazing. if only for this narrative she's conjured about clarke to be finally fucking shattered because clarke has never been that & it stemmed entirely from the fact that finn didn't love her anymore & wanted clarke & then clarke didn't sacrifice them all only to still not save finn. utterly ridiculous.

#the 100 #clarke griffin #anti raven reyes #ais.txt #answered #q #seeing raven's downfall from her early seasons is god #so frustrating. hate it here #hate this whiny loser

[unchartedcloud]

Clextober 2022: "A Post-Apocalyptic Halloween"

In the years following the Outbreak, the Fireflies have been convening as many medical minds as they can find to develop a treatment. Lexa Woods has been charged to bring one such mind safely across the country: Clarke Griffin, a medical student trained before the world went to hell. But when they get separated from the rest of their group, they need to traverse an abandoned shopping mall…and find a few Halloween surprises along the way.

Read Part 1 on Ao3.

“Do you remember Auntie Anne’s pretzels?” Clarke makes a whistling sound and Lexa winces. Does she plan to attract every Runner in the area’s attention? “Fuck, what I wouldn’t give for some of that fake cheese sauce.”

Lexa rolls her eyes - for her own benefit, as Clarke is still picking her way around puddles behind her. “Quiet, please.”

Clarke huffs and Lexa imagines a similar expression gracing her face, framed by persistent blond curls. “I might take Infected for company, at this rate,” comes the response, and from much closer than Lexa realized. When she turns around the doctor is just a few feet behind her, fingers twitching at the pistol strapped to her thigh despite her words.

The woman moves surprisingly quietly when she wants to, apparently.

Being briefly impressed doesn’t stop her from reprimanding: “You might get Infected for company at this rate.”

“I thought you said this place was cleared.”

“It was. Several times.” One last hop brings her back to ground level and Lexa fixes the angle of her flashlight as she comes around the side of the info stand. Sure enough, there’s a directory. Finally. “Doesn’t guarantee it’s safe. Infected have a bad habit of moving around.”

“The fact that it needed clearing several times does seem to indicate that is the case, yes.”

Lexa closes her eyes and takes a deep breath to center herself. When she’d been assigned to escort Dr. Griffin across the country to UEC, she’d jumped at the chance. It isn’t every day you get to prove your worth to the Fireflies by bringing one of the only currently living experts in infectious diseases, trained before the outbreak, to the best research facility still in existence. The doctor is young and her training was incomplete, but it’s better than nothing. It’s a lot better than nothing.

However, the woman herself is certainly something. Clarke, as she insists on being called, is not exactly the quiet doctor-type that Lexa recalls seeing on television when televisions still did more than gather dust. She is in fact rather opinionated, rather trigger happy, if well-trained in using a gun, and rather loud.

When she isn’t sneaking up on her, that is.

“Hey!” she crows from just over her shoulder, and Lexa whips around once more, expecting trouble – but the young doctor is merely peering at the mall directory as well, a grin on her lips. Her lips which are now incredibly close to Lexa, as she’s standing a scant few inches behind her. “Looks like they had one of those Halloween stores open before the outbreak started.”

Her heart still very much in her throat, Lexa takes a few slow breaths as she follows Clarke’s pointing finger. Squinting at the name she reads, “...a Spirit Halloween?”

#clexa #clexa fanfic #clextober #clextober22 #the 100 #the 100 fanfic #clarke griffin #lexa woods #commander lexa #the last of us au #my fic

[audi0med1c]

CHAPTER 2 of "Is It Over Now?"

"Look What You Made Me Do"

3,263 words - if you prefer to read on Archive or Wattpad...links here

---------------------------------

Lexa's thumb hits dial on her phone before she's even closed the door behind her, now alone in the back seat of the black Suburban after walking the young blonde up to her door and respectfully declining the invitation to come up for a nightcap. She had used the excuse of an early call time tomorrow for her reason for needing to head home, though it was only 10:30 and she could not be more wide awake.

"So I take it you are not face-deep in your smokin' hot date if you're calling me right now." The smug voice teases through the phone.

"It wasn't even a real date Anya, you knew that." Lexa pinches the bridge of her nose.

"You said your agent asked you to take out one of his buddies' newbies to help get her exposure, that's still basically a date."

Lexa sighs heavily.

"Also...incredibly bold of you to take her to Clarke's favorite restaurant."

"I didn't choose it!" Lexa exasperates, "I felt bad saying no when she said she'd never been able to get a reservation there!"

"Well you did choose to overdo the PDA." Anya snorts, "Based on what I'm seeing on twitter."

Lexa quickly opens the app and scrolls her timeline, seeing plenty of shots from various angles within the restaurant - no doubt from other diners - from the night.

There's one picture of her back, as she reached Clarke at the front of the restaurant, with the caption "Uh-Oh, caught bringing the flavor of the week to their old go-to spot!"

She scrolls some of the comments underneath....

-----------

Damn what a power move, I respect it though.

This was definitely intentional 😳 so shitty.

I feel so bad for Clarke. They're always a younger hotter version of her 👀

Omg Lexa in suits😍😍😍

Hahaha Lexa having exactly one specific type will never stop being hilarious.

Okay but CLARKE'S DRESS🥵....like yes I'd chase after her too Lex

------------

She scrolls more of the photos, images of Raven and Octavia shooting daggers across the restaurant, Lexa guiding her date out at the end of the night with a casually placed hand on the model's lower back, plenty of shots of Lexa looking like she's having a pleasantly flirty conversation while clinking glasses of champagne, and someone actually caught her placing the quick kiss on the back of the girl's hand when she returned to her table after Clarke left. She clicks into that picture, which is captioned "Lexa's Rizz is unmatched"

She hates that word – 'Rizz'... more dumb slang from Gen Z that is cringey as hell. But she's curious about the comments under this one, and as usual, it's a mixed bag of both her fans and Clarke's.

------------

Awww I would die on the spot if Lexa ever did that to me😭

Lexa thinking "You look like my next mistake"

This is the cutest shit ever!

Ms. Perfectly Fine strikes again😬

Lexa's game >>>>>

Ew that could NOT look more forced.

I need Clexa back!

Damn what she say to Clarke after chasing her on her way out? 👀

Imagine fumbling Lexa Woods 💀💀

Lexa's roster is 🔥🔥🔥

—————-

"Ummm hellooooo?!?" Lexa suddenly remembers she's still on the phone.

"Oh, sorry uh what did you say?" She stammers.

"You are playing with fire if you keep doing this you know..." Lexa doesn't bother asking if she's referring to the public dates with models or intentionally antagonizing Clarke any chance she gets. Anya is one of the few people who knows anything about what actually happened between them two years ago when everything blew up in the media, and the fact that she is dating one of Clarke's best friends has only made it more complicated to not constantly hear about what she's up to.

"Don't worry about me Anya," Lexa tries to play off her growing remorse at not coming up with a reason to go to a different restaurant, "If I know Clarke, I'm pretty sure I just ruined her night." She laughs to cover up the worry that it might actually be true, and that makes her want to give her driver the Beverly Hills address she knows better than her own and go apologize in person.

Instead she types out a quick text, contemplating it, before hitting send.

—————————

Lexa: Hey, sorry about tonight, I really didn't think about how it looked.

She's not expecting a reply right away, if at all, but her phone vibrates only seconds later.

The One💔: Okay, sure let's go with that.

Lexa: I am😒The champagne was a bit much though. It's not like you haven't had plenty of company yourself? Including people I used to work with, btw...

The One💔: At least I had the decency to keep my nights out of sight.  At OUR fucking spot Lex? Really? That's low, even for you.

Lexa: I said I was sorry.

The one💔: Whatever.  I expect it at this point.

———————————

"Uhh Lexa?" Anya says cautiously.

"What?" Lexa's hardly listening.

"Don't think you ruined her night."

"What do you mean?" Her attention sharpens, and she gulps down the lump in her throat, hoping it's not the one thing she doesn't want to hear.

"Raven just got dropped off and heard Clarke tell the driver to head to Malibu."

The words settle like rocks in her stomach.

"You still there?"  Anya says after a minute of silence.

But Lexa hangs up without saying goodbye, her chest heaves briefly as her pulse races. Her eyes barely start to sting when she shifts in her seat, sucking on her top teeth, heat flaring behind her ears as her fingers quickly type out another text she will probably regret tomorrow.

Lexa: Tell Niylah I said Hi.

She leans back in the leather seat and lets out a sigh, satisfied with one last taunt on the night, picturing Clarke venting to Niylah over more wine the rest of the night, the girl Clarke always told her was "just a friend" which turned out to be one giant slap in the face.

They were dating within weeks of Clarke and Lexa's breakup. Looking far too familiar and comfortable for two people in the initial stages of a romance. But the relationship fizzled out after a year, and now they were back to 'just friends' again, orsomething...and Lexa somewhat relished the thought of Clarke spending the rest of the night venting to her most recent ex about herself, even if it was in a negative light.

Her phone vibrated again though, and the words on the screen sent her stomach plummeting.

The One💔: Tell her yourself,  I don't plan on talking when I get there.

//

Clarke had shot off the same message to the same three people she always does. Two of them were for a more primal purpose, and the third was just for moral support and maybe some cuddles, and usually their responses made the final decision easier if she wanted any company at all over the silent efficient satisfaction of her electronic alternatives at home.

----

Clarke:  Up for a visitor?

Bel💙:  Aren't you with O? Everything okay?

Last Resort🤢: Of course, already hard just thinking about you.

Niy💞: You know you don't need to ask. Door is open. Tea or night cap kind of night? -----

She had already given the driver instruction to head to Malibu, knowing which option she preferred, and knowing, as usual, that it was almost always available.  Perhaps the most reliant person she had outside of Octavia and Raven, Niylah and her had remained close even after breaking up last year. 

They ran in the same professional circles, with Niylah being a gallery curator, which was how she and Clarke had met.  She was a pure-heart, kind, and understanding.  She knew before Clarke did that they just were not meant to last, despite their deep respect and endearment towards each other.  It didn't surprise her or upset her when Clarke finally broke things off, unable to commit to the next level of their relationship when the subject of moving in was broached.  Clarke realized she wasn't able to offer that level of commitment, or exclusivity even, to anyone - even someone as deserving of it as Niylah.

It honestly didn't even change that much about their dynamic, except the ratio of how much they saw of each other in the daylight versus at night became much more lopsided. 

Clarke enjoyed watching the scenery outside change the further away from the city they got, until they were driving along the coastline. The vast darkness stretching out to the horizon, the waves ominous as they danced and crested in the dark was eerily soothing. 

Her phone vibrates again, and it's the last person she expected to hear from tonight.

Walking 🚩: Hey, sorry about tonight, I really didn't think about how it looked.

She huffs out loud in the back seat, instantly annoyed. Always the same bullshit. Lexa always knew what she was doing.

Clarke: Okay, sure, let's go with that.

It had been months since they had seen each other at an event for Raven's tech company.  Lexa had made the very rare decision to come solo, which Raven and Anya probably made her do for the sake of their intertwined friend group, who was all seated together near the front as Raven's guests.

They had been seated on opposite sides of the round table, with Octavia inbetween her brother Bellamy, and her boyfriend – Lexa's cousin - Lincoln, on one side and Anya - Lexa's oldest friend - and Raven on the other.  Clarke wasn't sure exactly what to expect, since usually when they had to be around each other it was premieres or parties where they could mingle within a larger crowd and avoid each other easily. But sitting at the table, it was hard for Clarke to find other things to look at.

Lexa made it easier by being preoccupied with her phone most of the dinner, making no attempt to hide her smiles as she typed away to however many people she was talking to at the time, asking Anya how long she needed to stay before she was allowed to dip out for other plans. If there was one thing Lexa was always aware of, it was that being seen in public would find its way onto social media one way or another, and after being seen at the event at the same table as Clarke, she made a point of being caught very much cozied up to some model later that night at a club.  

Didn't think about how it looked my fucking ass... Clarke thought to herself.

Walking 🚩: Tell Niylah I say hi. 

Clark grinned. She knew Raven would tell Anya, who would tell Lexa where she was going.  She'd told the driver to head to Malibu regardless if she actually ended up going or not, making sure to say it loud and clear before Raven was fully out of the car.  Lexa's favorite thing seemed to be flaunting her parade of women in front of Clarke, but two could play this game, and Lexa would very soon come to learn that Clarke was much better at it.

Clarke: Tell her yourself, I don't plan on talking when I get there.

Niylah greets her with a warm mug of tea and even warmer hug, not letting go for almost a full minute. It had been a while since she has been here. 

"You look nice." She says softly when they let go.

Clarke slips her hands around the girl's neck, "Just kiss me, I've had a long night."

"What did she do this time?" Niylah chuckles. It catches Clarke off guard a little.

"What?"

"I'm not offended Clarke, but I'm not dumb. It's almost midnight, so there's only one reason you're here."

"Niylah it's not--"

"I said I'm not offended. It's okay, Clarke." The older girl urges, running her hands up and down Clarke's arms, "We didn't work out for a reason, but it doesn't mean I hate whatever this is, you know you are always welcome here.  I can be whatever you need me to be for you."

Clarke looks down, slightly ashamed, "I'm sorry I didn't mean to--"

Niylah cuts her off, lifting a finger under her chin to close her mouth, bringing her face back up to look at her, and grazes her thumb over Clarke's bottom lip before pressing a soft kiss into her.

"I guess I should send her a thank you note one of these days, maybe some flowers..." She smiles sweetly, "...if she's what keeps bringing you back here to me."

Clarke's eyes start glistening, and she wishes more than anything she had come here under a different circumstance. Her and Niylah had remained close even after their breakup, and it changed very little about their dynamic or connection, only that there was no longer any expectations or obligations to each other.  They saw each other a lot less, and in public they were mostly just cordial friendly associates, operating within the same circles both being in the art industry.

But when they were alone, they seamlessly fell back into the comfort and ease of each other out of habit.  It was a quiet, tender caring that Clarke let herself get lost in possibly too quickly when everything initially blew up in the media with Lexa.  It was an easy escape, a refuge from the harshness of having so much of your life on display all the time, of constantly being compared to everything and everyone else around Lexa. Always feeling like she had to prove herself.

After a year together, when Niylah had mentioned Clarke perhaps moving in, it hit her that they had already reached their ceiling, and Clarke knew she didn't have any more of herself she could give to the girl, or anyone else at the time, and it wasn't fair to take such a step knowing it would never be more than this.

"You Okay?" The older girl asks gently, reading Clarke's face.

"I'm fine." Clarke tries to assure, but her glossy eyes well up even more.

The girl takes Clarke's face in her hands, "You're not fine at all." 

"Niylah, would you mind not talking?" 

She could save the guilt for the morning.  Right now she needed to feel soft hands drag along her skin, warm lips laying claim to every limb. Her fingers tangle in open hair as her head falls back into pillows and she crumbles like a piece of paper, lost in the sensation and memories that should NOT be surfacing in this moment. She lets Niylah have her completely, keeping her eyes shut so that she won't be tempted to look down and realize it's not green eyes looking back at her.

//

Lexa is several shots deep in the back of a dive bar on the East side around the corner from her high-rise. She's made nice with the owner, who lets her in the back so she can tuck away in the corner and usually goes unnoticed as long as she keeps to herself. The local patrons are mostly middle-aged men who wouldn't recognize her even if one of her movies or shows was playing on the tvs in the corner over the bar.

Part of her wishes she hadn't turned down that invite to go upstairs when she dropped off her date. She keeps staring at the last message in her phone. I don't plan on talking when I get there.

It could be anyone else. Literally anyone else.

Clarke knew exactly what she was doing.

Niylah was the reason they broke up. Just waiting in the weeds, feeding Clarke who knows what kind of lies. Lexa always sensed she was feeding Clarke anything to help her believe the never-ending rumors that would swirl around in the media about Lexa and practically any female friend or co-star she had. Just waiting for the perfect moment, the smallest crack to push through and make her move.

Fuck Niylah.

Right now she's probably waiting with open arms for Clarke to arrive and hear how much of a betrayal it was what Lexa did tonight.

It was hardly a betrayal compared to what Clarke did with Niylah.

No, two can fucking play this game.

The brunette rips another double shot, before taking out her phone and sending a message that only ever meant one thing.

Lexa:

Cos: I can be there in 20? Lexa: Bring tequila.

Morning comes too quickly, bright and harsh and Lexa's head is pounding. She's sprawled out naked, on her stomach face first at the edge of her bed, and her hand fumbles around the covers searching for her phone to check the time: 7am. Damn. The space next to her is empty but she smells coffee brewing, and as soon as she attempts to sit up, a steaming mug is placed next to her on the nightstand, and the rich aroma stings her nostrils.

"You're alive" the perky blonde girl giggles, sitting on the edge of the bed and brushing the mess of wavy brown strands back from Lexa's face as she's hunched forward, trying to will the room to stop spinning.

"Baby Love... lay down, I got you, here." She props some pillows against the headboard so Lexa can lean backwards against them. "Here let me get you some water and advil too." As she's rummaging through a cabinet of medicine, vitamins, and supplements, Lexa looks through her phone, seeing mostly more tweets and comments about the run-in at the restaurant, but the nausea in her stomach worsens when she switches over to Instagram and sees a new post at the top of her feed. She stares at it for a minute, then drops her phone and races to the bathroom to empty her stomach.

"You good babe?" The blonde says through the bathroom door, concerned.

After a couple rounds of heaving, Lexa pants, "I'm good, just going to hop in the shower."

"Okay, did you want to grab brunch after?"

Lexa wasn't sure she even wanted to leave this bathroom anytime soon, let alone eat, or be photographed out with Costia after just being seen on a date last night.

Costia knows what they are, and more importantly, what they are not. It works for them. Costia is hot and fun and eats up the attention she gets as Lexa's favorite arm candy. What started out as just purely hookups over a year ago evolved into a real friendship with convenient benefits.

"Not today Cos, sorry I have a shoot later."

"Ohhhh is it for that new show? The one based on a book?"

Lexa turns the shower on, "It's just a mini series, not a whole show, but yea."

"Aw...I love coming along for those." The girl hints, and Lexa feels a little guilty for wanting as little human interaction as possible the rest of the day.

"Next time Cos, I promise."

The hot shower has her feeling brand new when she emerges, and she's relieved to find the apartment empty as well. She grabs her phone to text her driver, Gustus, about picking her up in a bit for her photoshoot when she sees a message waiting from Anya:

Anya: Looks like you were face-first in a smoking hot blonde last night afterall😏 We still hanging later?

Lexa is confused at first, but then checks her phone, and sure enough, is tagged in a new photo:

She notices who liked the picture, grinning as she plops back into her bed in her robe, smug and satisfied, thinking:

Let the games begin.

#clexa #clexa fic #clexa fanfic #clexa fanfiction #clexa fandom #ao3 fanfic #fanfiction #the 100 clexa #clexa au #modern au #angsty #messy exes to lovers #wattpad

[waldensblog]

the 100 Re-Watch: Bellarke Season 4

So in 3x13, on the beach, I think Bellamy was getting close to saying something before he got plot blocked. Right after baring their souls, (”I was so angry at you for leaving, I don’t want to feel that way anymore”, / “You know you’re not the only one trying to forgive yourself, maybe we’ll get that some day”. He lifts his head as if considering something before he notices Floukru had snuck up on them.

I think in that moment, he had decided to say something else - but then put it on hold, because they have things to deal with. So he once again shelves the feelings as he has been since season 1. I think he decided that after ALIE, when they’ve all survived and can get back to Arkadia, have that drink they could all use (since 2x16), that he would say something about his feelings, take a chance. 

He may have even been sort of trying with it a bit when he says “Okay Princess, what now?” in 4x01. It’s been a long time since he said that - originally an affectionate term from Finn, which Bellamy used to mock her, and has long since stopped saying. But the writers brought it back. Maybe they did only as a callback - but in universe, there would need to be an explanation beyond the Inkheartesque writers-made-him-say-that, so I’m going with he’s bringing it back as an affectionate term. There would be no reason to use it mockingly here.

Before getting around to saying anything, though, they all get thrown in jail by angry Grounders. And then:

I think over the course of season 3 he had suspected something might have been going on between Lexa and Clarke, but he didn’t know for sure, and he didn’t know what, until this moment. When he sees the pain she’s in, and knows that it’s still very fresh for her... he feels sad for her, and he changes his mind about saying something.

He can’t possibly tell her now. She wouldn’t be ready, any more than she was ready when Lexa kissed her back in S2 so soon after Finn’s death (not that Bellamy was aware of that, being in Mt Weather at the time). He also doesn’t say Princess again after this point, dropping the nickname which he briefly brought back. 

Once back in Arkadia, they spend the next few episodes trying to figure out a plan to save everyone from the end of the world. It’s in 4x06 I think he got close to saying it again. 

He may have noticed Niylah/Clarke bunking up at Arkadia, so he may think she’s ready to move on from Lexa. It isn’t serious between Niylah/Clarke yet (He probably doesn’t know about the “I’m not asking for anything more than this moment, that’s how I live.” / “I know”), but he isn’t apt to get in the way, not when he doesn’t know if Clarke feels the same way about him.  

Then two things happen. 

(1) He thought she was possibly dead when that body with a tarp was found in the water - but they rescued her. Relief, gratitude, just another day on Earth. 

(2) When they get to their destination he tells her he’s going back to Arkadia, she already knows why, because he’s been upset about Octavia this whole errand. She confirms it’s not pathetic to keep trying to win her back - she’s his sister, she’s important to him, and she will forgive him eventually.

When Clarke says this, and gives him that look - she looks away quickly, but I think he noticed. The words, the way she looked at him, the tone. I think he heard the words she wasn’t saying there. I think he strongly suspects it’s not unrequited. He wasn’t entirely sure before, but now he thinks... she may feel the same way. He turns to her, looks at her...and I think he decides.

He was waiting for her to be ready to move on, and then she started moving on with someone else, but now he’s pretty sure that it’s not unrequited, and he knows they are constantly in life or death situations, so he decides he’s going to tell her how he feels. Maybe it’s not the perfect moment, but there never seems to BE a perfect moment. Nervous, but determined, he opens his mouth. 

We don’t know what he was going to say, because she cuts him off, and he hesitates, but before he can finish getting the nerve to say “No, I need to say this” - plot blocked, they have lost a barrel! He loses the resolve, and once again, walks away without saying anything. 

The tragedy is, he never did say it even after this, when it seems to came so close to it. And I think it all comes back to both of them struggling with emotional intimacy/vulnerability. 

Bellamy always has, having had an illegal sister on the Ark, and unable to really confide in anyone until he got to Earth. Even Octavia, he says himself to Kane in 4x10 “Couldn’t tell her I love her even with the world ending”. He does, finally, in 4x11 (”I knew you’d come through” / ”I love you so much”) - but as Kane pointed out, Octavia knows. Everyone knows. Bellamy struggles to say “I love you”, but he shows it. 

And I think it’s very similar when it comes to Clarke - the few times he gets close to it, plot blocked, and then he loses the resolve. 

Clarke similarly, I think struggles with emotional vulnerability after everything that’s happened on Earth. After season 2, she really shuts down to most people. She developed emotional intimacy with Lexa, but even then, couldn’t manage to say “I love you” when she was dying - it was only in the City of Light that she found the resolve to say those three words, and then she was able to say it out in 4x01 to her mother. But like Bellamy, Clarke shows when she loves a person, even if she can’t bring herself to say the words. After season 4, she shows it 2,199 days in a row, even if he never heard her once.

#the 100 #the 100 season 4 #bellarke

[coeurdastronaute]

Winter Olympics Ch. 10

Previously on Winter Olympics

There were nerves. 

There were tied in the third period, gold on the line nerves. There were shoot out nerves. The once in a lifetime moment, in a full arena that was deathly silent, every pair of eyes on you, television viewers alike holding their breaths, kind of nerves. There was a family legacy of excelling in those moments, kind of nerves. A collection of nine Olympic medals, three Stanley Cups, two world records, and a dash of sibling rivalry, kind of nerves, ever-present in the all-encompassing moment. 

There was winning.

There was the moment the puck hit the back of the net, a little up-top three hole kind of goal. Just out of reach of a glove-side save. There were all of the nerves rushing out of her body as she screamed and pumped her fist. There was a final breath as her team swallowed her whole, gloves and helmets flying in the air as the quiet was broken and everyone yelled and screamed. 

Lexa was not unfamiliar with nerves. She had plenty. She thrived under nerves. 

But as she stood outside of a certain snowboarder’s room, Lexa felt nerves she wasn’t used to. Maybe it was the steady rush she’d had during the game, and the overwhelming relief that came when they stood on the podium, at the very top, and accepted their medals. When she bit her gold and earned a hug from her father, Lexa hadn’t thought about this moment. 

But now, she rubbed her sweaty palms against her thigh and stood a bit straighter. She squared her shoulders and closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. She had to knock twice, the first time her knuckles made contact, they were ineffectual, just tapping weakly. There were parties happening everywhere, but Lexa knew where she had to be after escaping her father and seeing her brother finally win his gold. 

“You,” Clarke smiled warmly as she opened the door. 

Lexa nodded and returned it a little weaker. 

“Me. You,” she returned. 

Hair still damp from her shower, wet spots littered her shoulders, while the door opened and betrayed the steam from the shower, and the smell of Clarke’s shampoo wafted around them, clean and perfect and warm. But she leaned against the door, moving only slightly to allow the hockey player inside. 

“You did it,” Clarke offered. “Congratulations.” 

They stood close, toe-to-toe, Lexa bowing her head to look down as Clarke looked up at her, the perpetual grin on her lips. 

“You too,” she whispered, searching the snowboarder’s face, reaching her hand up to softly run her knuckles along her jaw. Clarke’s tongue darted out over her lips quickly. “Anya wasn’t too mad, was she?” 

“Absolutely livid. But another one-two punch isn’t the worst for us. She said she’s going to come for my gold next time.” 

“Can’t have that, can we?” 

“I told her she was the only Woods to not get a gold today. Chapped her a bit,” Clarke smiled and shrugged, finally bringing her hands up to tug on Lexa’s hips, closing whatever meager distance had existed between them. “That and the 1800. She hated that.” 

Lexa cocked her head slightly, enjoying Clarke’s mood, and how contagious it was. She was happy, she was glowing, she was alive and warm and open. Lexa played with a strand of wet hair and felt thumbs rubbing against her hip bones. 

“It’s time for that conversation,” Lexa started, steeling herself.

She very much wished that she could have held off, that she could have let Clarke slip into her lap and they partied with all of their friends. But how could she sit there, killing herself to know what was going to happen? It was too much. She wanted to rip the bandaid off because for the first time since Costia, she genuinely believed she had a chance with the stranger who wasn’t a stranger. She couldn’t wait any longer-- she had to know.  

“Is that why you stood outside for five minutes?” 

“It wasn’t five minutes.” 

“It was more like seven.” 

“Shut up.” 

“Not a great way to start this conversation,” Clarke teased. 

But she sighed and leaned forward, digging her forehead into Lexa’s chest near her shoulder. Her whole body followed, leaning closer until her arms slipped around the hockey player’s waist. Lexa returned the hug, hanging her head and squeezing Clarke’s shoulders. 

“I have words to say, now that I’ve finished work,” Lexa began, pulling away. “And you’ve finished work. And we don’t have any other distractions.”

“Did you practice this speech?” 

“Yeah.” 

Clarke shook her head and grinned, taking a step back. She crossed her arms over her chest, leaning against a counter in the kitchen. Lexa felt unsteady suddenly, without a prop keeping her upright. She shoved her hands in her back pockets. 

“Go on then,” Clarke ushered. 

“I think we’re cursed, me and my family. We fall in love at the Olympics. I’m not--

“Are you-- did you just say--?” 

“Let me get it out,” Lexa furrowed, aware that she was already not starting on her script. 

This was why she prepared though. Her mouth tended to make sounds that were inappropriate and didn’t help the situation. 

“Yeah, but we’re circling back,” Clarke promised, taunting her. 

Lexa took a deep breath. She’d had some champagne already. There’d been champagne showers in the locker room. Much of it had gotten in her mouth. 

“I live in Boston. I have a whole life there. I have a dog there. And you have a whole life all over. It’s kind of not fair that all of this happened. I mean… I’ve been so focused on this moment, and now it’s over, and you’re still here, and I feel very strongly for you,” Lexa took a breath and finally looked at Clarke who seemed to be waiting for more. “What I mean is, I want you to meet Odie. And I want you to see my apartment. And it’s very selfish of me, to want that. But it’s been a great two weeks. Maybe you won’t like me tomorrow. Maybe the moment we leave Canada, you’ll hate me, because it has only been two weeks. But I don’t want to not see you for four years. And… I don’t know how to have this conversation. I don’t know what to ask for, I don’t know what to offer. I was hoping you might help.”

But Clarke remained quiet, her eyes warm but not giving anything away, her face perfectly plastered and stoic. The only movement that came from her body was the gentle, steady breathing of her chest. Helplessly, Lexa swallowed, afraid she’d misunderstood what conversation they were supposed to be having, and terrified that she’d misrad so many things. It wasn’t that long. Sixteen days, in fact. 

“Could you say… anything?” 

Lexa wished she’d kissed Clarke when she came in. That would have been the smarter play. 

“I didn’t want to interrupt the speech.” 

“It wasn’t much-- I hadn’t practiced-- okay, so it obviously didn’t come out right.” 

She ran a hand along the back of her neck and hung her hand there anxiously. But Clarke was amused, and Lexa felt perpetually like the girl in the hall who needed told how to flirt. She hated Costia more than anything in the moment, not because she was a terrible person-- they just didn’t work out-- but more because she’d taken up so much time and Lexa really wasn’t good at new languages. 

“I don’t know. I thought it came out just fine,” Clarke promised. “You’re the number one scorer in your league. You’re a staple on your team. I looked up your jersey. I could see myself wearing something like that.”

It still wasn’t making sense. Lexa held her breath. 

“I can offer you me, and my time, and all of my attention. If that’s something that interests you. I think you should ask me for all of it. I’m going to ask you for everything. If you’re serious about… you know… this,” she motioned between them, the space just a few feet. “I want everything you’re willing to offer.”

“Very,” Lexa nodded. “All of it.”

“Okay. So I can visit Boston. What do you say we start there?”

“Yes please.” 

“I heard you don’t share well,” Clarke took a step, closing the self-imposed space between them. 

“I’m the youngest. It’s a flaw,” Lexa shrugged. Her hands flexed in her pockets. She wanted to take a step but she couldn’t. 

“Let’s not share then.” 

“Yeah, I like that.”

“Maybe you won’t like me in Boston.” 

“Maybe.”

Another step until they were close again. Hands moved to her neck, ran along her shoulders and anchored there so the entirety of Clarke’s body pressed against Lexa’s. 

“Maybe Odie will hate me.” 

“Doubtful. Guard dog, he is not. He’s bribeable.” 

“Are you?” 

“You mentioned wearing my jersey?” Lexa smiled, her body relaxing with the proximity. “Sounds like a good bribe.” 

“There are more conversations to be had, but I feel like this is a good start.” 

Lips hovered near her own, and Lexa chased them slowly. Clarke’s breath ghosted across her chin. She nodded. Clarke could have asked her for her pancreas and Lexa would have nodded. 

“Olympic gold medalist, Lexa Woods, continues her father’s legacy of winning and finding love in the Olympics,” Clarke announced, earning a chuckle. 

“Let’s not think about him right now.” 

Lexa leaned forward before Clarke could try to be funny. She kissed her and earned a hum of agreement. She leaned forward and cupped Clarke’s ass and picked her up again so that she had to chase the lips that now sat taller than her by a bit. 

“I think I would like to find you after this,” Clarke whispered, pushing Lexa’s hair from her face. “And keep you.” 

“Can I keep you?”

“That sounds better.” 

Clarke kissed her this time, and Lexa maneuvered toward the stupid twin bed in the corner, careful laying her down and joining in her normal spot. They were needed elsewhere, and elsewhere would happen, but for now, Lexa was ready to savor. The conversation she’d wanted to have was marry me, run away with me, adopt more greyhounds or cats or bunnies, if you want, your parents for Thanksgiving, and mine for Christmas, what kind of dresser do you want, and we should never be apart ever again, type conversation. 

But Lexa was grateful none of that had come out of her mouth. She was happy with this. One day she’d get to have those talks. They’d make sense after a longer period of time than two weeks. 

“Now that that’s out of the way,” Lexa lifted herself up to pull off her shirt. “Want to go to the party?” 

“We can be a little late.” 

XXXXXXXXXX

1 Month

There were things to be done, after the Olympics. Clarke had a full slate of press and tours and branded promotions. Lexa had an entire slate of the same, on top of it being in the middle of her professional season. 

But they finally exchanged numbers, and distance was barely bearable, but they were busy enough to try to forget most days. 

It started when Clarke posted a picture of the pair from their whale watching excursion a few days after she’d flown home, alone. Missing the whales and this girl, she’d written in a bout of loneliness and ache one night before bed, knowing Lexa would see it she she’d finished her morning gym routine. 

Before falling asleep she looked at the picture of them, with Lexa wrapped around her shoulders, kissing her cheek with sea lions lazing in the background on a buoy. And even though they were across the world from each other, Clarke smiled and texted her a brief goodnight text. 

By the time she woke up, there’d been hundreds of missed texts and DMs and comments on the photo, their official coming out despite all of the other moments stolen. It was late, but she still called Lexa immediately, asking about her day and if everything was still okay. Her girlfriend just laughed and said it’d been a busy day for some reason, and Clarke let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. 

When she scrolled through Lexa’s page, she saw their pizza night, the entirety of their two families together near a fire pit, a few pitchers of beer on the table, Lexa holding up a pint, Clarke’s arm around her waist as they sat beside each other. Winning was great, but this was better. Clarke swiped to the next picture, with both of them making very stupid faces, very unflattering, but perfect. And the next a picture of Anya and Lexa, arguing about something. The next, just Clarke winking and making a face. Another of Lexa and her dad and brother. 

Clarke had known nerves. She’d known what it felt like to stand at the top of a mountain and fling herself down it, fling herself into the air and spin until she wasn’t sure she’d survive. She knew what pressure felt like, to want to win, and believe that she could, to be happy that someone else topped her, while at the same time desperate to be the best on her own. She knew pressure and nerves. 

What she hadn’t considered was what it would feel like to stand near the glass with Anya, in a jersey with Woods on the back, and watch Lexa without her knowing she was even there. That was a lot of nerves. She’d rather be on the top of a mountain. They were great apart. They kept busy, they missed each other, they texted, they sent pics, they did their best and it was tolerable, but barely. 

She’d known her for eighteen days in person. There were a ton of fucking nerves to make it real again. 

She hadn’t seen her since the end of the games. At least not in person. There’d been quite a bit of facetime and phone calls and selfies. But this was the first step, the first part that they’d first talked about. This was the beginning, and just like Lexa couldn’t wait to have the conversation, Clarke couldn’t wait any longer. She knew what Lexa looked like when she was concentrating. She knew about a birthmark on her wrist. She knew what Lexa tasted like, and frankly, she really missed it. There was this moment, the final night, the final time, where all Clarke could remember was Lexa’s eyes when their foreheads were pressed together. She missed Lexa’s labored breath on her neck. She missed the bruises on her thigh. She missed movies in bed. 

Lexa won the game. She put on a show, with one goal and two assists and not a broken nose to be seen. It was only when Lexa skated by that she stopped and put her fist up to the glass near her cousin. 

You, she mouthed, her eyes wide with surprise. 

Clarke pressed her palm against the glass, her smile so big she was sure that her cheeks were going to break. Once separated by thousands of miles, there was just a few inch thick piece of plexi glass keeping them apart now. It was still too much. 

If it were possible, the nerves were worse, waiting after knowing. It was too much time for Lexa to reconsider. It was too much time for Clarke to think about how impulsive it was. 

“You,” Lexa greeted her, swallowing her up in a huge hug, swirling her around outside the arena, melting all other worries away. “I can’t believe you’re here. When did you get here? How?” 

“Shut up,” Clarke smiled and finally kissed her. 

It was deep. She scratched and clawed her hold on Lexa’s neck and shoulders, missing it, forgetting how good it was, or worse yet, refusing to let herself remember. But she knew, instantly. She knew from the moment their lips connected. 

Lexa couldn’t stop smiling. She didn’t. And Clarke dug her nose into Lexa’s shoulder as they sat at a small restaurant with Anya and Bellamy. She’d missed, but not forgotten that scent. She inhaled it greedily, the slight hint of sweat, the bit of body wash, fresh and forested. 

Clarke knew nerves. She felt the immediately after the elevator opened and Lexa tugged her down the hall toward her condo. 

“I can’t believe you’re here. How long are you here for? You’re here. You… do you still like me?” 

Lexa dumped her bag on the floor and placed Clarke’s next to it. Two bags remained on top of each other. Two. 

“I do,” Clarke promised. “I’m sorry I’m a bit late. I came as soon as I could.” 

A dog stretched, yelping slightly as they lights clicked on and Clarke looked around at Lexa’s space. A big TV, some video game console. A comfy looking couch. A dog bed under the window. There were pictures on the wall, frame movie pictures. There were fresh flowers on the dining room table. 

Clarke was introduced to Odie. She was given slobbery kisses and let a cold nose nudge her hip and ribs. But Lexa nudged her head and told him it was time for bed, and he listened, slipping into his giant pillow happily. 

“I’ll give you the tour tomorrow, if that’s alright,” Lexa smiled quickly. 

Clarke stood in the middle of the living room, curious about all of it, curious about making Lexa more real. She wanted to know what it all meant. She wanted to understand what was happening. She wanted to see what was in Lexa’s fridge. But she hadn’t flown across the planet to snoop. She’d flown across the world to see the lanky goofball who looked entirely too good in her leather jacket and black jeans.

And just like that, Lexa was in front of her. 

“Do that thing,” Clarke looked up at her and bit her lip. 

“What thing is that?” 

“You know. The thing.” 

She slid her arms up along Lexa’s neck and wrapped them there, tying her hands together and grinning. It dawned on Lexa, and the tips of her ears burned slightly. Clarke watched her blush migrate across her cheeks, never stopping, just burning in the low light. 

“I can’t believe you’re here,” Lexa whispered, finally leaning forward to kiss Clarke in her apartment. In an instant she was lifted up again, and kissed harder. Her legs wrapped around the hockey player’s waist.

“Still like me?” 

“Good luck getting me to let go,” she chuckled, walking them down a dark hallway. 

There was a dim light left on by the bed in the nice enough bedroom. Clarke didn’t see much mess, somewhat not surprised that Lexa wasn’t a slob. Old sneakers were on the floor, some dirty clothes were hanging out of a hamper, a glass of water by the bed, a book on the floor, cracked open to where she’d left off last. But she didn’t give too much thought to anything else, just Lexa’s eyes and playing with her hair. 

This was real. They were doing it. They existed in real life, now. Clarke hadn’t considered it entirely. She thought she had, but she really couldn’t have fathomed this moment. 

When her back met Lexa’s bed, she fanned her arms out side, not feeling an edge in either direction, grateful for the large bed. Standing at the foot of the bed, Lexa just stared at her in her sheets. She tugged off her hoodie and tossed it on  her chair. Her belt came next, slid out gracefully from her pant loops. 

Fuck, Clarke gulped. 

“How long are you here for?” Lexa asked, meeting her eyes. 

“I don’t know. We can have that conversation tomorrow, can’t we?” 

Lexa smiled a bit wider as she finally knelt down between Clarke’s legs. 

“I can make my case as to why it should be a long time.”

XXXXXXXXXX

6 Months

She might have gone overboard. 

Lexa realized that as she looked down at her sweatshirt, and the cupcakes, and the banner, and Odie’s new bandana. As if he could read her mind, the dog looked up at her from his spot on the end of the couch before stretching and rolling over and getting more comfortable to laze away the day in his favorite summer sun spot. 

She didn’t care. 

It was a little warm, but she had the windows open as the evening fell on her condo. She’d spent the summer in Australia though, bouncing back and forth between sun and snow, training with rugby players, discovering Clarke’s home. But she came home for the birth of her first nephew, and it’d been three weeks. 

The first time Clarke showed up at her game, three weeks after the Olympics ended, Lexa meant it when she didn’t want to let her go. There’d been conversations. She got better at talking. She got better at not being nervous. But they had separate lives and jobs to do, and there wasn’t much to be done. It helped when Clarke went to train in Idaho though, it was a little easier. When Lexa decided to go with her for the summer, it confirmed everything. 

They were a much loved couple, for some reason. Her father said they almost had more medals together than him and her mother, which made Lexa chuckle. Another Olympics and Clarke adding slopestyle would do it. If she won. Which she would, Lexa knew. She had that kind of faith in her girlfriend’s work and passion. 

Lounging on the couch, she tucked her beer against her side and started another game, anxiously checking her phone every few minutes to see if Clarke texted that she’d arrived. They really hated airports, choosing not to go with each other and endure it. Instead they just said goodbye at each other’s place. It was the same with pick ups, and she was actually okay with it for just this instance. 

She smiled to herself when she heard a key in the lock, Odie’s tail thumping against the blanket he’d stolen for himself. Quickly, she tossed her headphones and controller on the coffee table and stood there, still oddly nervous about the new decorations in the condo. 

“Fuck,” Clarke breathed as she tossed open the door, lugging her suitcase in, another giant one in the hallway. 

But she didn’t get the second in, just stood in the doorway. Lexa liked how Clarke traveled. One of her old ballcaps she’d ‘lost’ on a trip, well worn and with a band of discolored fabric near the bill from sweat. It was the first one she got when she was drafted by Boston. It’d seen many a run along the river. It now saw many airports and Australian beaches. 

“What’s…?” Clarke cocked her head and looked at the gear on display. Her smile started small. “Is this for me?” 

“Wanted you to feel welcome,” Lexa shrugged. “You know since you’re a college student and all.” 

“Did you leave anything at the BC bookstore for any other freshman to buy?” 

“Nope.” 

Odie thumped his tail and walked off the couch toward Clarke, nudging her hand for pets, licking her fingers and wagging eagerly. She looked at his bandana and chuckled slightly. 

“I also got you this, as a moving in present, well part of one,” Lexa moved to grab the hamper full of gear. “Got you towels, and a toothbrush. The coffee you like. Some snacks. Lots of shirts with my name on the back. You’ll be repping Boston Pride for a while, actually. Oh, can’t forget a key ring,” she held it up and smiled. 

“I’m moving in with you. Not a dorm, you know that, right?” 

“Yeah, well. I wanted you to feel at home.” 

“Because I live here now.” 

“Yeah,” Lexa smiled. 

Clarke smiled back at her. She didn’t care. She sprinted the few feet that separated them, and Lexa barely had time to react before her girlfriend was giggling into her neck, a koala on her body. 

“You,” Clarke whispered, pulling back before kissing the hockey player, her hat bill pushed back as she chased lips. 

“Me,” Lexa murmured against her lips. “I’m so proud of you. I hope I didn’t go too overboard.” 

“No, it’s nice.” 

“I also got you a night stand. With extra chargers. And your favorite shampoo. And the creamer you like. And we can go shopping. Get you whatever you need.” 

“I live here now,” Clarke sighed, content and a bit in disbelief. 

“Yeah.” 

“You do a pretty good job chatting someone up, for the record.” 

“Hopefully I never have to do it again.” 

“I’ll say.” 

“I do have a question fo you, though,” Clarke adjusted, Lexa’s hands holding her up. “It’s my favorite question of all time.”

“What’s that?” 

“Your bed or mine?” 

“How about our’s?” 

“Good idea.” 

[talktomeinclexa]

Mend The Heart You Broke (Heal The Wounds You Caused)

By: TalktomeinClexa

Rating: Mature

Warnings: None in this chapter, Panic attacks, Depression, Suicidal thoughts in other chapters

Status: WIP (6/9)

Summary: Clarke and Lexa led the perfect life. Married, two children, a big house, a group of reliable friends. Until Lexa cheated on her wife and the idyllic picture was smashed to bits. Three months later, Clarke is still trying to put the pieces of her heart together when Lexa slowly comes back into her life. The path to forgiveness will force the artist on a self-introspection journey that won't leave anyone unscathed. But isn't true love worth the fight?

***

Chapter 6: Come Home

Life thrives on being unpredictable. A lesson that Clarke should have learned by now. Yet, when her phone rings with another unexpected news, she is caught by surprise.

Dring dring

“Clarke Griffin-Woods speaking.”

After kicking Lexa out, she tried to go by “Griffin” again, only to burst into tears at the first call she received. Since the divorce is on permanent hold — and she doesn’t feel the need to let everybody and their cousins know about the state of her marriage — she reverted to her married name without too much heartache.

“Hello, Ms. Griffin-Woods. This is Marcus Kane, the owner of Arkadia, the gallery downtown.”

“Mr. Kane, hello. What can I do for you?”

She has had the occasion to visit the gallery a few times over the years. It’s not the MoMA or the Guggenheim, but it hosts an extensive collection of local and international artists on their way to fame. They have crossed paths in previous exhibitions and social events, one of Clarke’s former teachers doing the introductions.

“Well, I don’t know if you’ve heard, but I recently decided to expand and acquired the building adjacent to Arkadia. In order to celebrate this and the new artists who have signed up with my gallery, I plan to organize a large exhibition for Christmas. And I was hoping you would like to take part in it.”

Clarke’s heart hammers against her ribs at the thought. Her name has gained some traction in recent months, and she has had more commissions than ever before. But to take part in an exhibit in Arkadia? That would put her on the map. Both a thrilling and terrifying prospect.

“That’s a very enticing offer, Mr. Kane. What would it consist of exactly?”

“Well, I currently have space for four of your paintings. Possibly more, depending on a couple of answers I’m still waiting on.”

Four of her paintings. Clarke’s mind goes on overdrive as she reviews the ones she has in storage or ongoing. With most of them being commissioned, she has only two pieces that could be submitted. None of them good enough, she fears, to fit the bill should critics be there. She can’t miss this chance to shine and take her career to the next level.

Enthusiastically accepting the challenge and thanking Mr. Kane for thinking of her, she wonders how to tackle the main hurdle in her path: finding time to paint while raising two children.

The following Sunday finds her nurturing a glass of wine at Raven’s, the Latina and Octavia listening to her with rapt attention.

“That sounds like an amazing opportunity. It’s what you’ve been dreaming about for years.”

“I know. Obviously, I said yes. But how am I going to manage with the twins? They are at day camp right now so it works, but what will I do once they are back in school? I’ll have to pick them up at three most days, and with the chores and my other commissions, it won’t leave me much time to prepare for the exhibit.”

Octavia hums as she brings her glass to her lips and swallows a sip of red wine. If someone can understand Clarke’s dilemma, it’s the cop married to a firefighter. Her and Lincoln’s shifts were a nightmare to synchronize at the beginning of their careers and even worse once they had Chris and Aurora. Clarke babysat them more than a few times over the years when a nanny canceled at the last minute. Things are easier now that Indra — Lincoln’s mother — is retired. But knowing how much of a handful Aurora can be, the artist doubts Indra will be willing to take care of the twins too.

“I wish I could help,” Raven starts, sensing she might be the only available option, “but I’ll be working on an important project in the coming months. I know that Anya will be happy to have them here from time to time, but it can’t be more than occasional.”

Clarke leans heavily against the back of her chair, bracing herself. Raven has proven to be more open-minded about the whole situation than expected, but Octavia wasn’t shy about her anger toward Lexa before. Which makes sense considering that her father cheated on her mother and then took off, never to be seen again.

“Don’t worry, I understand. Actually, I was thinking about asking Lexa to move back in.”

Keep Reading

#clexa fanfic #clarke griffin #lexa the 100 #married clexa #cheating (mentioned only) #road to forgiveness #mend the heart

[popchoc]

WITH YOU I’M BORN AGAIN

Fandom: The 100 / FTWD / TWD

Main Characters: Clarke Griffin, Lexa i.e. Alicia Clark

Tags: Crossover | Adventure | Romance | Friendship | Family | Conflict | Plot Twists | Canon | Probably too much fluff for a zombie apocalypse | And yes most likely some adult cuddling too ;-)

A new planet brings new enemies, but help is just around the corner. “I told you I’ll always be with you.”

A The 100 / FTWD / TWD crossover, following two long lost lovers - together with their friends and foes - in their search for freedom.

CHAPTER 49 - LEXA | ALICIA

"You ever thought of that?" [Jesus] asks me, suddenly turning towards me again. "You ever realized that Lexa had to die for Alicia to be able to exist?"

I swallow, taken aback by his sudden question. "I... I haven't," I admit truthfully.

"You see, the thing is, I really like this me. And despite this world being as fucked up as it is, I would lie if I said I wouldn't like this life. Wouldn't have want to miss any of it. But does that mean it's been all for the better? Should I be grateful, even?!"

As his eyes pierce deeply into mine, I feel a wave of turmoil washing over me, drowning me in a pool of stupefaction.

Perplexed as I am, I can only stammer. "N- No?"

"Of course not!" he exclaims, "I was robbed! We were robbed - you, me, all of us! Who knows how great our lives could have become? How great we could have become?!"

I open my mouth, about to speak up - even though I have no clue what to say, but he's already ahead of me.

"That's what they took from us," he points out - literally, as he swiftly shoots forward, his finger only ten inches from my face, "The chance for us to find out. To see for ourselves if this new life is indeed some sort of improvement, something worth dying for."

Still lost for words I blink, hoping I can at least break his stare. I'm not sure if he's even aware of it, as he already sits back, suddenly looking all relaxed again and sounding strangely calm when he continues, "Then again, I do really like this new me. So there you go. I got stuck. You got me stuck."

[ full chapter on AO3 ]

#clexa #clarke griffin #lexa #alicia clark #twd jesus #ftwd charlie #the 100 #fear the walking dead #the walking dead #crossover #fanfiction #with you i'm born again #formally known as: #reborn

[daqueen-yihwa]

So, nighbloods can be used as hosts for other nighbloods? Then maybe they could resurrect whoever is in the Flame, soooo... Lexa could come back in another body, hoping that the Dark Commander they keep talking about doesn't hijack the whole thing

#the 100 #why would they keep bringing that commander up #it's their chance to bring back lexa #but i don't think they're gonna do it #i'm not a super fan of lexa after season 2 finale but she was an awesome character #her return w be interesting #clarke griffin #lexa #commander lexa #lexa kom trikru #heda lexa #madi #madi griffin #nighblood

[sencire]

Still thinking about writing a part 3 for Precious. Here’s a part of what I have so far (straight from my drafts). Not sure it will ever see the light of day though …

~~~

“Why didn’t you bring Madi?” Lexa asks, wrapping herself around Clarke and all that Clarke can think is that this is why.

“I’m selfish,” she admits and takes a long breath of the scent of Lexa’s skin. She always smells so good. And she feels so good. “I wanted you all to myself.”

Lexa chuckles, pressing her hips closer to Clarke’s thigh for her to feel the wet heat between her legs.

“Where is she? Your mom?”

“Yeah,” Clarke murmurs, her eyes closed again and she moves her thigh just a little bit to spread the wetness, to feel all of the heat. She can’t make up her mind: stay like this, quiet, still, and the feeling of it. Or move to ignite the sighs again, the moans, the whispers, and the feeling of that.

“That’s okay,” Lexa’s voice is a breeze against her ear. “I like Madi but I’m very okay with being alone with you.”

“We haven’t had much chance to be alone together yet,” Clarke says, having decided that scraping her fingernails across Lexa’s back is a good compromise because it makes Lexa shiver in her arms and her low growl is almost better than a sigh.

“That’s true.”

Lexa kisses her again and opens the kiss for something deeper, a slow, lazy swipe into Clarke’s mouth that makes Clarke want to explode. She runs her hands down Lexa’s back who has shifted slightly, just enough to be on top and now she slides her thigh between Clarke’s legs.

Clarke mumbles against her lips.

“I’m not going to stop kissing you for the next hour.”

Lexa kisses her again, keeping her eyes open to stare down into Clarke’s as she begins to grind her hips a little, more a tease than a purposeful action but still. Clarke’s mind has been hovering somewhere in outer space for a while now, returning to her body for bare moments to make sure she’s still breathing and replying it seems. Basic survival. It surges upwards again when the skin of Lexa’s thigh makes contact with her clit and she closes her eyes, watching the stars behind her eyelids explode like tiny fireworks.

She feels Lexa’s lips on her mouth, drawing her into another deep kiss. They fit so well. Lexa’s lips against hers. Lexa’s body against hers. Lexa’s hand in hers. Like they’re made for each other.

“Two hours,” she mumbles, “I won’t stop for the next two hours. Or three.”

Lexa pulls her with her as she rolls onto her back to get Clarke on top of her, such a swift movement that Clarke hardly realizes what happened until she sees Lexa smile up at her instead of down at her.

“Four,” Clarke states, feeling giggly all of sudden just as much as Lexa seems earnest now. Her gaze is so serious that it makes Clarke wonder what goes on in Lexa’s head in moments like this. Her eyes turn into deep, bottomless pools that Clarke just wants to jump into and get lost in. Lexa takes her breath away, with everything she is. Her looks, her manners, her brains, her whole appearance, her gentleness, her boundless patience with which she always makes sure Clarke is okay with everything they do.

“Can I ask you something?”

Lexa blinks, clearly not expecting them to talk.

“Uh, sure.”

Clarke allows herself to slide down a little so she can snuggle up to Lexa’s side and put her head on her chest. The scent, the feeling of warm skin on her cheek distracts her for a second.

“How can you feel so right?” she whispers, wrapping her arm around Lexa’s body just so she can be even closer. She hears the rumble of Lexa’s low chuckle before the sound leaves her mouth.

“I don’t know. Don’t they say there’s always a catch? Maybe there’s a catch with me too. You just haven’t found it yet.”

It sounds playful and teasing, daring Clarke to join the game.

“Well, tell me what it is. Where’s the catch? Are you, maybe, married?”

It feels as if the room goes cold for a moment, between two of Lexa’s breaths. A sharp intake, a shudder in her chest, a long exhale. Her fingers still and she swallows heavily.

“Divorced.”

Clarke hasn’t dared to move but looks up now.

“Oh. Uh. Sorry.”

“It’s okay.” Lexa gives her a smile but the tone of her voice betrays the lightness of it.

“Can we talk about something else?”

“We don’t have to talk at all.”

#it's a lovely scene #the one no-one asked for #just trying to motivate myself I guess #Precious #clexa fic #clexa #aware #kairos

[butmakeitgayblog]

Any chance of seeing CoA Clexa in their twilight years in a one-off story?

It's short and sappy and honestly barely a scene at all but I figured a few people could use a little pick men up 🤷‍♀️ sorry for any mistakes

////////////

The high whistle of steam broke the slow tapping of her thumbs.

She glanced over at its wailing shriek and hit send as quick as her burgeoning arthritis allowed, setting down her phone and Marco's idle inquiring into their day along with it. Her steps only slightly shuffled on her way to the stove, barely stopping to grab total and click off the flame before filling the two waiting mugs.

A spoon of honey and squeeze of lemon went into one, a splash of milk and sugar for the other.

She could measure the exact amount for each with one arm tied behind her back.

Naked.

In her sleep.

"You gonna help me, or what, lazy bones?" Lexa said as she carefully lifted one mug in each hand, eyeing and sending a quick kissy-click over to the dog waiting in the corner.

Sandy blonde fur swayed along to the jingle of a paw shaped collar as the man of the Griffin-Woods household padded across the kitchen and nosed open the screen door. He stood panting but patient, obediently standing in place as Lexa stepped through the doorway and out onto the back porch.

"Thank you, kind sir," Lexa cooed as she successfully made her away around the furry butt holding the door clear for her without spilling a drop. The lazy thuds of his tail wagging against the screen made her smile as Lexa gave another kiss sound to let him know it was okay to retreat back inside and out of the slight nip of the evening air. "Who's my best boy?"

"Don't let Marco hear you say that."

"While I'm sure Rave has taught him to wiretap our phones, I doubt he heard me."

"You underestimate him being as nosy and pushy as his mother."

Lexa smiled as she carefully settled in her seat. "He just text to see if we wanted him to bring something dinner on his way home," she sighed. "He's afraid we're not eating enough."

"Tell me I don't know that boy."

Reaching over and threading her fingers beneath the weathered padding of calluses and the knobbly bumps of joints, Lexa scooped up Clarke's hand and brought it to her lips. She let the murmur of, "You do," slip easily over the speckled skin.

She loved the paper thin softness that marked the passage of time over her hands. How it sunk to the featherweight brush of her lips and held it. Held her kiss. Didn't bounce back with the tight vibrancy of youthful collagen.

Clarke was prone to pout over the development of the last few decades. To say she had the hands of a crypt creeper that would scare her old stock of patients away. But Lexa adored them for what they were, a testament to a full life having been lived, and beyond that the fact that she'd been allowed them to grow that way. To watch years and life and experience imbed themselves into the webbing between her fingers. To see happiness and loss and heartache carve their marks into her palms.

Lexa smiled over when Clarke released a contented hum.

"You know he wants us all to go to his lecture--"

"No."

"Clarke--"

"I'm not flying anywhere," Clarke resolutely decreed with a sip of her tea. "I told Raven to send me a recording, I'll watch it then."

"Why are you so difficult, woman."

"Because I'm old!" Lexa let out a bark of laughter as her wife gave her an obstinate shake of her head. "I'm allowed to be curmudgeonly and generally difficult. I've earned it. I changed so many of that boy's diapers and fixed every damn boo boo he had, he can't argue with me."

And Lexa could only nod because she did have a point. Because despite being a great a mother, Raven's general dispersion of blood and all things icky had led to many somewhat frantic house calls at the Griffin-Woods home during their godson's youth.

"But it's in Boulder. And you remember how good of a time we had the last time we went," Lexa purred and leaned over, brushing aside a few sandy blonde and grey hairs that had escaped her wife's braid. She felt the rumble of Clarke's hum as she pressed delicate kisses along her jaw.

"That was a good week," Clarke groaned.

"Yes, ma'am, it was."

Tucked away in a tiny cabin in the foothills of a snow-powdered mountain, they'd spent the week of their seven-year anniversary wrapped up in themselves and each other. Lexa still laughed at the memory of them finally settling in from unpacking, how they'd settled on the front porch in picturesque fashion with blankets and hot cocoa and wonderful view of the surrounding forest. How they'd released twin sighs of serenity and shared a few weighted moments of silence.

She'd made it all the way to the count of twenty before Clarke had finally cracked.

"So..." Clarke had casually started with a drum of her fingers against Lexa's thigh, "... you wanna go have sex?"

They'd both been tripping their way back into the warmth of the cabin before she'd even fully given her emphatic yes.

It really had been a good week.

"If you went," Lexa hushed into Clarke's ear, "I could always book another--"

"Devil woman," Clarke hissed playfully swatted her away, only sending over a steely eyed glare when Lexa burst into an evil fit of laughter. "Don't seduce me with your wiles."

"My wiles?"

"Yes. Your wanton sexual magnetism that makes me agree to things I don't want to do."

"So you're saying you think I'm sexy."

"Eh," Clarke lifted her hand in a so-so motion. "Not worth breaking a hip in the snow over."

"Truly, a romantic." Lexa batted her lashes pressed a kiss to her wife's palm before lacing their fingers together and letting them rest in her lap. "Really though, we don't have to go. I just promised Marco I'd try."

"You can still go if you want to."

"I'm not going anywhere without you."

Lexa merely shrugged when Clarke continued to stare at her. It always amazed her how powerful she felt when those eyes were on. Eyes that had never lost their sapphire luster from the day she married her. The ones she woke to each morning and saw last thing at night. The ones that never failes to make her fall in love all over again.

Clarke sighed into the quiet and rested her chin in palm.

"You know, I'm kinda glad I married you sometimes."

Lexa snorted and squeezed her hand.

"Yeah. Me too."

////////////

#anon #CoA #CoA snippet

[lexa-griffins]

Did farm clexa ever carve a pumpkin and put Madi inside when she was a baby?

That is actually the plot for what was going to be the continuation of Pumpkin Spice Craving! Here's a little snippet from it :)

"Ma!" Madi sounds out again planted on the floor, surrounded by an entire council of plushie critters. She’s still scared of the cows and horses, real or stuffed, but seems to have taken an affinity for the soft versions of the critters that tend to make their small farm a home. 

"Yes, ducky?” Lexa asks, absent midedly, eyes still trying to grasp the last paragraph of the book page, taking any chance she can to get her daily reading in.

“Uh!” The baby exclaims, pointing at the window, “Ma!”

Staring out the window, Lexa’s eyes fall on Clarke walking through the backyard, a massive faded orange pumpkin in her arms, mud boots sinking down in the wet ground as she walks with the added weight, a grin morphin from ear to ear when she sees Madi excitedly bouncing on her chubby legs, perched on the small table by the window.

“What does mama have there, baby? Is it a pumpkin?” Lexa coos at her daughter as she lifts her from the ground, watching Clarke drop the off shape pumpkin on their picnic table by the kitchen door with clear pride, shaking any dirt it might have gotten on her flannel and overalls off. She quickly turns back to them, urging them to come outside with her hand.

In her arms Madi wiggles with excitement at her mama’s present, babbling away as she points to it, “Ma! Uh!”

“You wanna go see the pumpkin ducky?” 

Madi lets out an excited shriek at the proposal, wiggling more violently, never the type to stay still for long and Lexa chuckles at her, kissing a rosy cheek before making her way outside, although not before fighting to get her jiggling baby inside a warm coat. 

“Ma! Ma!” Madi exclaims the moment Lexa opens the back door, extending her little arms in Clarke’s direction, who comes running to take her daughter into her arms. 

“Do you like the pumpkin mama got for you, baby? It’s so big isn’t it, Madi?” Voice full of excitement and pride, Clarke delivers a few wet kisses to her daughter cheeks, purposefully ignoring her wife’s questioning eyes. She knows fully well she was very explicitly asked to bring a small pumpkin for Madi to decorate, not a squash so big it had taken all of Clarke’s muscle mass and will power not to drop on the floor along with all the pretty pennies it cost.

To her question, Madi drums on the pumpkin with both hands, giggling at the sound it makes.

“What’s your game plan here, my love?” Lexa questions into the nape of her neck, arms wrapped around Clarke’s mid section, “‘Cause I’m almost certain this was not what I asked you to get. Do you plan on having her decorate this for the next five years?” There is humor in her voice, and Clarke sighs, realizing she is not in that much trouble for going rogue on her pumpkin purchase. 

“Well,” Clarke starts, focused on helping Madi stand by the squash without falling, “My plan was for the three of us to decorate it together. I’ll gut it, you can carve it since you insist I don’t do it right -”

“- You don’t.”

“- and then we can let her go ham on the painting!” Clarke finishes her case, purposefully ignoring Lexa’s comment, “Also, it was so much cheaper than buying three pumpkins, Monty must be insane, seven bucks a pumpkin? Is the moonshine not selling well this year?”

Lexa chuckles and bites her lip as she stares at Madi and the her-sized pumpkin, the little girl happily slaps while babbling away. She’d envision Madi’s first halloween in detail since the past fall, when cravings and back pain kept her awake at night, including the adorable crochet duck costume Lexa started working on a couple weeks ago. She guesses the tiny, perfectly round pumpkin in her vision can easily be swapped by the wonky shaped one that seems to have marveled her daughter so much. 

“I think I have a big enough candle to light it properly.” She finally speaks up, turning her head to plant a kiss in Clarke’s neck before she leaves her wife side to go and take Madi away from the pumpkin she is trying to get on top of with shaky legs. 

The baby whines and kicks as she is taken away from her new toy, a pout settling on her lips that a kiss from her mother quickly wipes away. 

Clarke smiles brightly at her, “Of course you do.”

With the baby propped on her hip, Lexa turns back to her wife, a smile pulling at the corner of her lips “Why are you looking at me like that?”

It’s not the first time, and certainly not the last, she finds Clarke staring at her like this - lopsided smile with shinning eyes, like Lexa puts the stars in the sky in the darkest of nights. A rare sight Lexa used to catch in the corner of her eye as her and Clarke grew up side by side, now a constant in their shared life that always seems to catch Lexa off guard in the most delightful of ways.

“Hm?” Clarke hums, clearly too busy staring to register the question.

Lexa shakes her head, stepping towards her, “Nevermind,” she chuckles, adjusting Madi better on her hip before leaning in to kiss Clarke, humming into it. 

Wrapping a hand around her waist, Clarke kisses back, settling into it easily. Clarke still tastes like the coffee she had in the morning right before she left for the market, the one with added vanilla and cinnamon they spend the past five years making together after buying the farm and that Lexa has yet to enjoy now for the second fall in a row as she tries to avoid caffeine while she feeds their already hyper baby.

They settle there for a bit, enjoying the crips air as they share a warm kiss, only for a slap to be delivered right to their faces, effectively separating them.

“Ma!” The culprit exclaims with a frown. 

Madi is stingy with her mothers’ attention and doesn’t seem to enjoy when their focus is on each other when she is right there, a trait very present from the moment she was born. Clarke giggles at her daughter’s antics, taking her from Lexa’s arms and elevating her above her head, causing the baby to explode in high pitched giggles, kicking tiny legs in the air.

“Oh, do you want kisses too ducky?” Clarke asks, bringing the baby down to pepper kisses on her nose before lifting her again, “More?” She asks again, eyes wide as she brings the baby down again.

And Lexa gets why Clarke stares. She does it too. How could she not. 

#letter opened #farm clexa #my writing #clexa

[100hearteyes]

Clexaweek 2021: Day 3 - Reunited (a summary)

Several months after Praimfaya, Clarke is roaming the now deserted Earth without a destination. All her friends on the spaceship actually died (ship exploded after take-off); there’s no Madi either. So she’s roaming the desert when a portal opens and out comes.... her doppelganger.

After a less than warm introduction, because it’s Clarke (and there’s two of them now), Clarke 2 tells Clarke that they don’t just look alike — she’s her but from another world and her name is Ruby. And she makes her an offer (mind you, Clarke is desperate and 100% she is going to die sooner or later): trade places with her. Ruby will stay in the desert, where she actually has the tools to survive, and Clarke can take her place in her own world.

Clarke’s like 🤔 a chance to actually live a life 🤔 know what could’ve been in a different world 🤔 well what the hell, I’ll take it. So Ruby hands Clarke an object that allows her to travel ONCE to another world and they part ways — Ruby stays in our Earth, whereas our Clarke goes to that other world.

Clarke lands in a 16th century style palace bedroom. She barely has time to collect her bearings when the door opens and---

---in full 16th century noble garb, looking heartbroken, when she suddenly sees Clarke and... she nearly faints.

Sixteenth century Lexa goes totally neurotic because her Clarke just died so who is this imposter??? And she knocks Clarke down and is about to kill her (as if she could bring herself to do it) when the door slams open and---

Yes. Another one 👀 two Lexas. Clarke’s lil bi heart can’t take this.

This one is dressed completely different, a lot more sci-fi, almost like a modern deity. And she just comes in and MIB’s the first Lexa and Clarke is like WTF IS GOING ON HERE??? But also-- LEXA????

This Lexa, we’ll just call her Lexa for the sake of both our collective sanity and the story because Lexa is you-know-what, helps Clarke up and asks her to come with her, to which Clarke is like lol no, explain first. But Lexa’s all like annoyed eye roll and look we don’t have time, I promise I’ll explain everything if you come with me. She also assures Clarke that 16th century Lexa will be fine, she just won’t remember what happened.

Anyway, Clarke goes with her and they enter a sort of palace/tower in the middle of space or like in a rift between worlds. There’s a big room there with an oval/round table, which is basically a database for every single Clarke and Lexa in existence. The building is called The Observatory.

Lexa explains that there is a multitude of universes and timelines where the two of them exist. A lot of their iterations have different names, but sometimes they’re called Clarke and Lexa. Those are like their “purest” versions.

So, yes. They’re soulmates. Obviously.

And there is always a Clarke-Clarke or a Lexa-Lexa watching over all of them, making sure everything runs smoothly. Which is what Lexa does. When an Observer dies (time passes normally for them) another takes her place.

Basically, in this AU, every Clexa fic that’s ever been or ever will be written is canon.

Anyway, Lexa tells her tat the Lexa-Lexa or Clarke-Clarke that becomes the Observer is one who has passed away too soon. And Clarke is like 👀👀👀 so are you MY- but Lexa shuts that idea down very quickly.

So what happened to this rogue Clarke? A Clarke aka Ruby has been killing other Clarkes for a while but Lexa has no idea why and she also doesn’t know WHICH version of Clarke she is. There’s millions, billions of their iterations.

She killed 16th century Clarke (whose name wasn’t Clarke), too.

And why can’t Lexa just go after her in Clarke’s world? Because while you can detect anomalies (like a live Clarke in a dead Clarke’s world) you can only locate Clarkes or Lexas if you know WHO they are. Also, the Observer can’t stay in any world for longer than two weeks.

Clarke asks Lexa why she didn’t just go back to her world after being sort of brought back to life. Lexa explains she’s only allowed a short total amount of time in her original world and she already used some of it a long time ago when she went back to help her soulmate when no one else would. Clarke, remembering how her Lexa showed up in the City of Light to help her, says it must have killed Lexa’s Clarke to lose her a second time. Lexa says it was just as painful for her.

And she can’t stay on HER original world for longer than a day — otherwise she dies/disintegrates (and another Observer will take her place.

Clarkes and Lexas are supposed to live out their lives without outside interference. In some worlds they know about soulmates, in others they don’t, bu they need to live in their own worlds and timelines. The Observer observes — everything else is considered tampering with how things are supposed to be. So the time limit rule is meant to keep her from influencing other Clarkes and Lexas and from going back to her own world.

So Lexa can’t just jump into Clarke’s world going after Ruby because it might take too long to find her.

Still, they have a name now, thanks to Clarke — Ruby. So they look it up... Only to find out there’s like a thousand Rubys. Obviously they can’t find a ruby needle in a haystack so they try to understand why Ruby would go on a soulmate killing spree. Clarke and Lexa start visiting every world and BONDING and shit.

There’s also some soul searching on Clarke’s behalf because she’s struggling between being sad about Lexa but also mad because once again she was left behind. And Observer Lexa helps her sort through all those feelings, and our Clarke starts maybe developing some feely feels for this Lexa but also feels GUILTY.

And this one time there’s something Lexa says that makes the lightbulb go off in Clarke’s head.

What if Ruby never had a soulmate?

What if there was never someone meant for her in the first place?

Lexa counters with the fact that several iterations of them never even get together, that being someone’s soulmate isn’t binding — there’s still a choice. But, Clarke says — how heartbreaking would it be to never have a choice at all?

You can never make the wrong choice or the right choice. You can never change your mind. And it’s heartbreaking to have that choice ripped away from you.

That’s Ruby. She never had a choice. And, as they find out eventually, she comes from a world where soulmates are a pretty big deal. Upon finding out by accident that there are billions of Clarkes in millions of other worlds who have a Lexa, while she — sue to some crazy glitch of the universes — had that choice taken away from her, her excruciating pain turned into something ugly. And she decided to start killing Clarkes, so Lexas all around other worlds would feel HER pain.

And that’s how Clarke and Lexa realize what was missing: the numbers didn’t add up. The sum of Rubys with living and dead soulmates didn’t match the total number of Rubys — because there was one whose soulmate was neither dead or alive. She never existed in the first place.

So they manage to filter out all the other Rubys and find the right one. Lexa’s intention is to stun and arrest her, but Clarke is a little more practical and just takes a gun.

Before they go, though, Clarke and Lexa have a heart to heart.

At this point, their feelings for each other are too strong to ignore. So before they go, Lexa asks larke to stay with her in the Observatory even after they catch Ruby. Clarke wants to, but she also feels guilty because she’s falling in love with THIS Lexa and it feels like a betrayal of HER Lexa. And she feels like she owes it to HER Lexa to make an effort to survive and build something in their world. So she tells Observer Lexa she can’t, because she can’t run away again like she did when Ruby came to her. She HAS to build humanity back up in her world. She HAS to survive.

And that’s when Lexa — nervous, tentative Lexa — asks:

“Maybe life should be about more than just surviving. Don’t we deserve better than that?”

So, yes. It’s Lexa 😌

(If you think about it - I didn’t mention it but - she knew which Clarke Clarke is right away. She didn’t ask, the Obervatory didn’t tell her. She just knew who Clarke was. Because Clarke has that scar on her forehead from when Emerson attacked her. And the moment she saw it — she KNEW.)

Lexa didn’t say it before because she knew Clarke would want to stay with her but she didn’t know if there would be any consequences. And if there were and it turned out to be impossible for Clarke to stay, then the heartbreak would have been all the greater, because they’d be losing each other a fourth time.

Anyway, Clexa reconnect and everything is beautiful but they still have a murderous soulmate to catch.

They teleport themselves to a spot close to Ruby. Some fighting ensues, Clarke loses her gun, which ends up in Lexa’s hands, and Ruby ends up pointing her own at Clarke’s pretty head. And Lexa has a double reason not to dire that gun: one, she’s still a grounder and grounders don’t touch Mountain Men weapons; two, she’d be shooting a Clarke for all intents and purposes.

Ruby taunts Lexa about not being able to shoot her, pokes the bear a few times about how she’ll have so much fun killing Clarke — You wouldn’t mind, would you? After all, it’s just another one in a billion —, yada yada.

And then Lexa actually shoots.

And Ruby dies and Clarke runs to Lexa’s arms and Lexa is like, I thought I was over the violence, and Clarke pulls her to meet her eyes: We are now.

Clarke and Lexa go back to the Observatory and Clarke asks if it’s actually safe being there, if she or Lexa won’t be harmed for it. And Lexa tells her she’d been thinking about how everything happens for a reason and maybe, just maybe — maybe this WAS always meant to be their second chance.

(Or third. Or fourth.)

So they stay there and live out their days together traveling between worlds and making a home for themselves in the Observatory. Their maybe someday has arrived at last; they owe nothing more to their people.

#Clexaweek21 #Clexaweek21 Day 3 #Day 3 reunited #reunited #clexaweek #clexaweek2021 #mine #my fics #sorta #all great things

[femininenachos]

How are CttC!au Clarke and Lexa doing? I love that fic so much. I read it again last night. Bless you for writing such wonderful fic!

Thank you 💜💜💜💜💜

Have some notes/outline I wrote for a hypothetical next chapter:

They make plans for Lexa to fly to Toronto for a long weekend

There's some tension around Clarke's insistence on buying Lexa's plane ticket. Meanwhile, Lexa is adamant she wants to pay her own way. They argue a little - not a fight, but they're both stubborn.

Until Clarke is like, exasperated, "what's the point in having money if I can't spend it on the people I love?"

And Lexa relents, her objections dismantled by pleading eyes that haven't lost their ability to disarm her over Facetime

Lexa goes to the set to watch the filming of Clarke's show. She's met at the security desk by an assistant (Maya?)

The set: a dingy basement club, the brick walls covered in overlapping tour posters and fliers: The Stooges, New York Dolls, The Velvet Underground, Iggy Pop. A small stage at the back of the bar, lit by a couple of spotlights. Tables and chairs scattered around. A neon lit bar runs the length of one wall.

Clarke's costume: smoky eye makeup and faux fur hanging off one bare shoulder. All in black. An alluring stare directed at the camera

Lexa gets to watch Clarke in action, tearing up the stage. It blows Lexa's mind. Impressed by it all and wholly infatuated by Clarke's performance, this charge of headstrong rock, the bluesy swagger of her vocals, full of crags and cracks, and the sneer on her lips. Parading around with so much attitude. Clarke glances at Lexa while she sings in a sandpapery alto, holding Lexa's gaze for a long second and it gives her chills

Lexa gets an insight into what acting for television is really like. Each scene is shot multiple times from multiple angles, with different sets of blocking. It takes hours to shoot a single minute-long scene. Resetting the position of the cameras. Adjusting the lighting. Makeup and hair retouches. Running the same lines 20 times over, at varying cadences; faster, slower, and the widest range of emotional temperatures. Heightened or naturalistic. Intense preparation and a flurry of activity followed by a lot of waiting around

There's no privacy either. People knock on the trailer door every five minutes or you could be sitting around for hours

Clarke's process for memorising lines: she has a working script where she writes out the lines from the whole scene and blanks out her own, leaving only the prepositions as a memory aide

Lexa watches Clarke chat with the crew a little, the gaffers and grips. Jokes as a hem is adjusted or a hair is teased back into place. Sees how at ease and natural Clarke is with the crew, no ego. She's super nice and polite to the production assistants when they bring her water between takes

Murphy is the opposite. He takes a method approach. He doesn't talk to anyone or make eye contact except with the director or producers during downtime to stay focused, stay in character. Withdraws to his trailer. Even maintains a flawless English accent throughout (thick Brummie like Ozzy Osbourne? for the lols)

At the break, Lexa tells Clarke how badly she wants to kiss her. And Clarke is like, "Uh, I'm not gonna incur the wrath of the hair and makeup ladies by letting you mess up my look, buster."

But she walks her fingers up Lexa's bicep, following the trunk of the tattoo, then slips her hand around to grip the back of Lexa's neck. "Fuck. Kinda really want to though. But, hey, come discover the joy of craft services."

They hang out with the extras at lunch, and Lexa falls a little deeper as she observes Clarke interacting with people, remembering small details about their lives and showing a genuine interest in them

The AD asks Lexa if she'd like to be an extra in the scene and she leaps at the chance - can't wait to boast to her pals at the salon. Tris, in particular, is gonna flip her shit when she hears

At the denouement of the scene, Clarke goes off script, wades into the crowd, through the press of bodies and up to Lexa. Tells Lexa under her breath to follow her lead and pulls her into a hungry kiss. Lexa's dazed reaction is genuine and she sways forward as Clarke retreats

Dimly, she hears the director remark: "Okay, we're keeping this."

#asks #cttc #cttc headcanons