#jason was very confused

[glitter-stained]

Random goon: Hey boss, were you the one to pick that name as an alias? And why this one?

Red Hood : I used to have another name, before... A long time ago. But that person is dead now. I get to choose for myself now, they can't take that from me. I won't let them.

Goon: Huh.

***

Random Goon: Say boss, why do you never take off your shirt in front of us?

Red Hood: Well uh, I actually have that really fucked scar on my chest and I'm not comfortable with...

Random Goon: Don't worry boss, we get it, you don't have to explain yourself to us.

***

Red Hood, high on some toxin: God, I wish my family...

Random Goon (on boss-sitting duty): why not try reaching out to them?

Red Hood: They would never accept me as I am now... They wouldn't agree with my so-called "life choices". Besides, they don't miss me, they miss the person they think I used to be... I wasn't even a man when I last saw them.

Random Goon: Damn boss, that sucks.

***

And then the goons throw the Red Hood a party on trans visibility day and Jason is so confused he straight up cries.

#supportive goons #Jason read somewhere that showing vulnerability helps being a good leader #they have pool parties #the goons love jason #best mafia boss ever #he knows all their names and helps their kids study for school #they're all very concerned to find out he's 19 #jason todd #under the hood #under the red hood #red hood's goons #oh to be a zombie drug lord in this economy #they're a little confused but they got the spirit #batman #batfam #batfamily #batman and robin

[feyburner]

Guess who got hit with a de-aging beam 👍🏻

Page one text:

Dick: Let’s see, you’ve met ✨me✨, Duke, Dami, Al… who else is around…

Dick: Oh hey! It’s Jason!

Jason: Uh.

Timmy: Jason………. Todd?

Dick: That’s right!! (Wow, good memory!)

Jason: Hi.

Dick: T-TIM?!

*

Bonus:

#tim drake #bruce wayne #dick grayson #jason todd #bat family #dc #droring #sometimes you’ve already had a very long and confusing day and you are simply not prepared to meet your hero 😔 #this was a groupchat concept that rapidly spiraled out of control. see also: mammutblog #timmy au

[dragonpyre]

Ok but au where Jason had vitiligo or poliosis since he was a kid and always had the white hair streak but just dyed it when he was with Bruce so as to not give away Robins identity. Stops doing that after he died cuz there wasn’t really a point. Somehow the rest of the family (minus Bruce) didn’t even KNOW he has poliosis/vitiligo and just assumes it’s a death thing

This leads to many confusing conversations

#Cass gets very upset when she comes out of the Lazarus pit with no cool hair streak #dick once bought him a shirt saying #“I died and all I got was this cool hairdo #much to Jason’s confusion #text post #dc #dc comics #jason Todd #red hood #batfamily #batfam #Batman

[ghost-bxrd]

Prompt:

Tim is the first to find out the Red Hood’s identity and from then on sticks to Jason during patrol like glue (much to Jason’s chagrin, dammit, it would feel wrong to beat up Robin when he’s that starry eyed…)

Cue: PANIC from the rest of the Batfamily, who still think Hood is a forty-something year old crime lord and now assume they’re dating.

#misunderstandings #miscommunication #protective batfamily #dick is NOT having it #neither is Bruce #I connected the dots- YOU CONNECTED SHIT #I connected them #Tim is very confused about all the ‘you can tell us if anything is wrong’ talks #are they talking about the one time Jason shot at him? because honestly it was pretty obvious he wasn’t even trying to hit him it’s FINE #if I see anybody add something that comes even CLOSE to ship bashing I shall make this Jaytim out of spite #no bashin in this house nah-uh #maybe some mild joker bashing #but it’s still ok if you like him #let’s keep this ✨harmonious✨ #jason todd #dick grayson #batfam #bruce wayne #robin #tim drake #red hood #fic #Nightwing #Batman #prompts #this is part of my fic roster btw hehe

[kaidatheghostdragon]

Good reveal au, where after learning phantom's identity and realizing the atrocities that the GIW have committed (or alternatively, ethical science au, where they find out the GIW plagarized them), the fenton parents decided to create the 'ultimate ghost-ending weapon' and sell it to the agents.

They go absolutely overboard, describing to the agents in meticulous detail how it evaporates any ghost it hits near-instantly and describing it quite ruthlessly in the blueprints, and soon the GIW have raplaced all their main weapons with the new gun.

Except it doesn't actually kill ghosts. It's the Fenton Bazooka. You know, the one that creates a portable portal to suck the ghost back into the ghost zone? What they actually did was retool it slightly to make it look more grusome than it actually is. They even added a beacon in Phantom's Keep, which all Fenton Bazookas will target when they open a portal, so the ghosts are always delivered to the keep.

From there, Phantom stationed an emergency medical team at the keep to treat the many injured and ragged ghosts that the GIW 'destroyed,' and to explain what just happened.

What they didn't anticipate was that now that the GIW have a mass-produced weapon that they believed would effectively eradicate ghosts, they would go on the offensive. They have a number of cities they've been monitoring but didn't want to get involved in without better tools.

One of those cities is Gotham.

And the Bats are ectocontaminated enough to register as ghosts.

Batman witnessed several of his children get evaporated by green energy weapons within mere moments of each other. He's absolutely gutted. Devastated. They didn’t even stand a chance.

He'll get his revenge, and it's frighteningly easy to track the weapon to private subcontractors. The Doctors Fenton, in Illinois. Their research calls for the genocide of all ghost kind, and apparently, that war started by killing his own children.

His children will not die in vain.

He gets to Amity Park and finds the Engineer's Nightmare of a building that is Fentonworks, but that night, before he can hack through the security and break in, one of the windows opens.

It's one of his kids that he had watched evaporate before his very eyes. They give him a silent signal of one of their identifying security codes and gesture for him to come inside.

Is it a trap? A prank in poor taste? Utterly genuine?

He goes through the window.

All of his dead kids are there, wearing borrowed pajamas and only their dominoes to conceal their identities. Daniel Fenton (son of the Fentons, this is his bedroom, has voiced a few arguments against his parent's views, but still an unknown) is among the crowd of teens and young adults, twirling on an office chair and obnoxiously sipping a capri sun.

"First thing you need to know, Bats," Daniel says after finishing his drink, "is that my parents are absolutely NOT genocidal ectophobic scumbags, and that is the reason why your kids are still alive."

#the bats are not the first human liminals that the giw 'killed' #whenever humans land in the keep frostbite immediates calls phantom to take them back to earth #alternate scene at fentonworks: #bruce spies maddie on the phone and overhears her saying she'll 'inform batman when he arrives' #its frostbite/phantom on the phone telling her to keep an eye out for any bats because some of their team was 'killed' #and shortly after she spots batman spying on her and gestures for him to come in #and when theyre both in the lab the spectre speeder returns chock full of various bats and team phantom members #needless to say bruce is very relieved and incredibly confused #and his kids have a pretty wild story to tell #i deliberately left which kids vague #but i imagined jason and tim for sure and possibly two others #they hadnt left fentonworks yet as to not inform the giw that they survived and knowing that bruce would find them #it would also give away the fenton's trick and dont want to reveal that before the agency has been stopped #so they have to make a plan that doesnt reveal that theyre alive or expose the fentons deceit too quickly #the fentons may have to be temporarily arrested by the justice league while the investigation is ongoing #to hide the fact that they werent actually helping the giw #dpxdc #dp x dc

[determined-ghostworm]

Nom. Nom,nom,nom,nom!!!

Danny is a bite first, beat up later kinda guy when it come to clowns.

-So is Jazz, she just has more self control-

Inspired by

Which was inspired by a prompt from @p0ssym1lker

Both are ✨✨✨ beautiful.

#batman #dp x dc #dpxdc #dp x dc fanart #dpxdc comic #danny phantom #danny phantom comic #danny phantom fanart #dp x dc art #jason is confused #but he is enjoying this very much #he will buy this feral scrungly teen a smoothie

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 109

“What the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck-” Tim chanted to himself, looking down at his cup of tea in betrayal. Was he hallucinating, had he been drugged with something? He had slept last night! 

Yet there in their own Lazarus Pit, the one in the cave not the giant one somewhere under the rest of Gotham, was a literal baby, looking just as surprised as he was. Of course that didn’t last, and its face scrunched up as it started to cry, which was his first hint that no, this was not in fact a hallucination. 

 There was a pit baby in the Lazarus pool. 

. . .

 There was a pit baby in the Lazarus pool. 

OH FUCK, there was a pit baby in the freaking Lazarus pool- 

#dcxdp #dpxdc #prompts #Tim has reverted to tea to try and not drink as much coffee #Will that last now? who knows #tim is so done #He fishes the lazarus baby out with a cloth and his pole #Danny's accident happened when he was a toddler #he was in the lab with his parents and they left him unsupervised #He's a toddler and big shiny button ooh- #He's very confused and scared but latches onto the first person he sees #The rest of the batfam are also confused when they head down and Tim has?? a baby??? #A baby who looks like a reverse Jason with white hair with a black streak #Tim what did you do-

[allthegothihopgirls]

when the batboys (as civilians) have to speak to authorities about situations, they're all pretty accustomed to having to lie to keep their vigilante identities a secret. so they'll fabricate why they were in a certain place at a certain time, how they landed in a situation, or how they sustained different injuries.

they were all properly trained on giving false accounts to protect themselves, whilst still giving ie: police the important crime details, or doctors the relevant medical info. and it's just one of The Things they all do and don't really think twice about.

then damian comes along. constantly going "to say that is how i ended up there would be simply belittling to my character" or "that's absurd. no one will believe that. why can't i just tell them what actually happened?" and no amount of explaining will help him understand why.

there is a lot of subtle nudges and whispers of "damian, just do it for god's sake", because he finds the absolute worst times to question their strategies too.

#i think the whole soup of league training and bruce training gets to him more than just a little #he gets. very confused #damian wayne #damian al ghul #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #dc batman #dc comics #dcu #dc #robin #the robins #batboys #batfam #batfamily #gothihop speaks

[mikakuna]

i have this thing where i involuntarily make really high pitched noises because i literally cannot help it. it's basically a vocal stim.

so now i'm imagining baby jay during his robin run who has little vocal stims that sound like a baby chick. he already looks like one with his yellow cape wrapped completely around him and only his little wide-eyed face poking out.

sometimes he gets so excited or worked up during patrol that he makes baby chick noises while hopping around and hiding in bruce's cape. it just happens, okay! bruce absolutely loves it-- he imagines his inner self just falling to his knees and clutching his heart because oh his little baby is so precious...

+

bruce: robin, this is superman and wonder woman.

little jay who's so happy he can't form words: *squeaky baby chick noises*

#jay baby is just very precious #he tilts his head like a puppy when he's confused #the manor floor has a dent from how many times bruce falls to his knees #happy baby jason just casually making grown adults fall to their knees because he's so cute #jason todd #red hood #jason peter todd #robin jason todd #second robin #batman #bruce wayne #bruce and jason #superman #clark kent #wonder woman #diana prince #(( writing 💌 ))

[caspertheloudassghost]

Sooooo in Batman: The Adventures Continue #9, Jason has a dead older brother named Danny Todd (who is only mentioned in that issue and never again).

Where are the DCxDP people and why haven’t they found this yet

#dp x dc crossover #jason todd #danny phantom #dc comics #I have the comic somewhere #it’s the first one I ever read for dc #i was very confused #when I learned Jason’s actual backstory #they killed him off in the same panel they introduced him #dc x dp au #phantomsweep

[flamingpudding]

Time for some time shenanigans?

Here is an idea.

Time is an interesting thing but not something one should mess with unless your the being ruling over it. And in a moment of true Clockwork No! Clockwork Yes! Fashion. The ruler of time decided that something needed to be done to help his king heal once more after having lost his family.

And as someone who lived millennial of years and no real understanding of humans aside from what he sees from watching timelines, Clockwork came up with the, in his opinion, perfect solution. Deaging his king into a toddler and sending him into the past to expirence some familial love. He had made sure his little king was getting picked up by the man with an adoption problem. A family with a lot of siblings for his king to love and to get loved back.

Now, that would all be fine and dandy if Clockwork had remembered to at least seal or erase his kings memories. The problem was he didn't. But really, what could his little king with his memories but the mind of a toddler do?

Apparently a lot. Espacially with the help of the family that picked him up.

Okay, plan B. Clockwork was going to send all his king's rogues to keep him and his vigilante family occupied so his king would stop attempting to get to Amity Park and change his own past and focus more on his new family.

Meanwhile the bat clan is freaking out. Their newest baby brother of 3 years old appears to be the constant target of other worldy attacks they barely managed to protect him from. Why were these weird beings after a little toddler that hasn't harmed anyone?! And why in the name of anything good did it look like the toddler was okay with fighting them too?!

#danny fenton #dp x dc #danny phantom #dpxdc #crossover #dcxdp #clockwork time shenanigans #deaged danny #exists at the same time as normal dp timeline #clockwork promises its a plan to heal his king #deaged danny just needs to keep out of amity #danny is stubborn though #so clackwork sends in the ghots rogues #the bats do their best to protect baby danny #while also getting very worried and confused #why do these beings keep attacking a toddler in their care?! #bruce wayne #damian wayne #jason todd #tim drake #dick grayson #cassandra cain #batpham #random ideas

[nerdpoe]

It's the End.

A huge mission, the world at stake, and in the end only Red Robin, Impulse, Wonder Girl, and Superboy made it to the center to place the bomb that would the alien mothership.

Superboy is injured.

Red Robin is injured.

Impulse is injured.

Wonder Girl is injured.

They know they won't be able to outrun this.

They die in sacrifice to something Greater, clinging to each other for comfort.

They wake up.

And oh shit look at that they've been reborn.

But there's been changes.

Bart is reborn as Tim's fraternal twin. Instead of loving but distant, Jack and Janet are criminal in their neglect. Not even Tim can defend them; they forget to leave food for their toddlers, for fucks sake.

Bart takes control and ends up speeding to Central City as soon as he can toddle to go on food runs. He knows what it's like to go hungry, in the future that wasn't, and he isn't going to let that happen to Tim.

Kon is reborn as Clark's actual, legitimate firstborn with Lois, who Clark had gotten together with far sooner in this new world. They love him so much and he...doesn't believe it. Can't. He isn't who they think he is, he doesn't deserve this, and when they find out it'll only hurt him more if he falls for it.

Cassie is reborn as Wonder Woman's only daughter, and spends her summers with her father, Steve Trevor, before he passes away and all other times in Themyscira.

Now they have to grow up in a world so very different but so very similar.

Cassie still looks in on her other mom, her first one, but has nothing she can say to explain it to Diana.

Bart still has super speed, but Tim is still a non-meta.

Kon struggles with the Clark he's seeing growing up and how much it clashes with the Clark he knew in his past life.

#young justice au #batman au #superboy au #flash au #impulse #tim drake #kon-el #conner kent #cassie sandsmark #bart allen #reincarnation #just a fic idea #story prompt #fanfic #all of them relearning how to function in a very slightly different world #tiny tim with a tiny bart living nextdoor to the waynes #and tim being confused because he DID NOT live next to the waynes growing up #and bart getting overprotective when bruce adopts jason #clark not understanding why his toddler son seems to distrust him and lois #it's breaking his heart and he's trying his best but there's always suspicion in those tiny eyes #diana is convinced that cassie is trying to find maternal comfort with a complete stranger and doesn't know what to do about it #everyone hurts and it's D E L I C I O U S #Also dick and barry know for a fucking fact that bart drake is a speedster #they fucking caught him multiple times goddamnit but he just keeps wriggling his way to freedom #Dick tries to tell Bruce but he and Bruce are on rocky terms #but Alfred listens #and Alfred learns that not only was Dick right but that Bart wasn't doing it just to be a little devil #once Tim knocks on the Wayne Manor door with his twin draped across his back sick with fever #and asks for food with bright red ears and eyes that refuse to meet the older mans in shame

[mokulule]

The Number You Have Called Cannot Be Reached 2

Part 1

Ship: Dead on Main (Danny/Jason) Warnings: angst/depression and canon typical violence

Jason stared. He stared at the spot where the Ghost had literally sunk through the roof - and would Dick just be unbearable when he heard that, how the name he’d given their thief was even more fitting, but this was just the sort of stray thought a person had because their head was filled with other things that they couldn’t as easily understand.

Absently he registered the demon brat scolding him haughtily for letting the villain get away and how he would never have allowed such a thing had he been the one to capture him, tt.

Jason didn’t pay it any mind, knew Damian was just as confounded by the Ghost getting away like a literal ghost, as he was. The Batclan had been hunting this guy for weeks and for all that time, he’d only shown invisibility as a power, something that was easily countered by the thermal filters in their masks.

Absently he touched his chest, where just a moment ago, the guy had snuggled up to him, and… and purred?! It was the only word he had for it. How else could he explain that humming sound at the edge of his hearing. Guy had been so overwhelmingly happy, and for a moment Jason had been shrouded in those feelings again. There’d been something like a questioning tilt to the humming, but Jason didn’t know how to respond, didn’t know why the guy had been so loopy. Had followed him up desperately like a man drowning, headbutted himself into his chest and snuggled up, so happy.

And then the spell had broken, as suddenly as it had appeared.

The guy, deeply embarrassed, had sunk into the rooftop, but that was not what Jason had noticed. It was not what had his mind chasing its own tail. No, it was the way that call, those foreign feelings, cried out in sorrow and such soul crushing loneliness as he disappeared. Jason felt hollowed out from the whiplash.

Bruce stood up from where he was crouched by the spot Jason had initially tackled the ghost, instantly commanding attention in the way only Batman could.

“Hood, debrief back at the cave.”

It was testament to how out of it Jason was that he just nodded with a quiet yeah. A large black gloved hand set down on his shoulder squeezing for a moment. Jay looked up and met the white-out lenses of the cowl. He shrugged off the worry and stepped back defensively, “I’m fine.”

Bruce watched him for a moment before nodding and moving across the roof, Robin at his heels. He jumped down but Robin paused and looked back and now Jay was even worrying the brat. He sighed and waved him on, he really had to get his head back on straight.

Anger come on, he could always count on that, he was always some level of angry, the pits made sure of it, he had it under control but that didn’t make it gone. He waited for that familiar angry bubble in his chest… nothing. Bruce! Bruce patronizing him, replacing him… nothing! Just sadness, longing to belong again - his shoulder burned where Bruce had touched him to make sure he was okay - he shook his head, this wasn’t working. Leaving the Joker alive! That was better but, there was only the most sluggish bubble at that like a sleeping dragon huffing at him as it turned over to continue sleeping.

Jason walked backwards until he hit the ledge. He had his helmet off and in his hands before he knew it. He needed to breathe. Heavily, he sank to the ledge, his gloves creaked as he clutched the helmet.

The pits were quiet, for the first time since he came back to life he was alone in his head. Fear clutched his heart, because what was he supposed to do with that?

Answers, he needed answers. One step at a time, he berated himself, taking slow breaths. To get answers he needed to find the Ghost. To find the Ghost he needed intel, intel the others had. The Ghost hadn’t operated anywhere in Crime Alley and hadn’t been Jason’s problem, until tonight when the chase had gotten near enough to his territory that he’d bothered to come back-up the brat instead of just mocking the rest of the clan’s inability to catch a simple thief. There wasn’t anything simple about Ghost, he thought, remembering those piercing glowing green eyes. He had to have something to do with the Lazarus pits it was the only thing that made sense. And he realized, he’d deliberately been hiding the extent of his powers. They’d been trying to catch him for weeks and he’d never phase shifted before.

His thoughts were going in circles again. It was no use staying here. Time to go to the cave and see what the others had - he stood up and braced himself for the whisper: the ever present distrusting voice berating him for being a fool for following Bruce’s orders, for letting himself be drawn back into the fold. He had all his arguments ready to convince himself that he was going for his own sake.

Silence. There was no whisper.

He shuddered, deeply unsettled and pulled his helmet back on. The faster he figured this out the better.

Oo o oO

Danny entered his temporary haunt, a long abandoned subway rail yard, dragging his feet after him, and sank down in front of the still mostly bare frame of the portal in the central open space. He rested his head on the cool metal. It hurt to breathe, particularly slumped like this, but he didn’t have the energy to move.

Slowly he rubbed a hand across his face, gingerly touching the bump on his forehead. He couldn’t believe he was so starved for company that he had somehow interpreted getting bowled over as a hug, and yet the ghost of the touch still lingered. His core ached in outrage over loosing that closeness. Well, his core was stupid anyway - he was stupid.

He’d dropped the spectral calibrator too, this entire evening was a waste. It had only left him hollow and hurting, and no closer to getting home.

Slowly his eyes, tracked over to his worn blue backpack all of six feet away from him, where his dwindling supply of dry granola bars was. He wouldn’t have much choice but to go out again soon. At least nicking food usually didn’t get him the attention of the local “heroes”. He’d had enough of those for a while.

He should eat something now. But it was too far too reach and he didn’t feel like moving.

The ambient ectoplasm of this city really wasn’t enough to keep him running at full strength and he knew, in theory that he should make up for it by eating more.

It was the pro of being a halfa that he could transform food into energy for both his forms, the con was that he was terrible at being a halfa and he just wasn’t hungry. Just tired, always tired.

He longed for home, for Jazz and Sam and Tucker - heck he would take Valerie hunting him down in another dimension to shoot at him over this. He felt himself fraying at the edges and now apparently because he had no one, he’d latched on to the first random person who felt like a ghost, like some kind of weirdo. The man probably wasn’t even a ghost, he hadn’t responded at all like one. He doesn’t know how he could have been so fooled.

He let his head rest on his knees, closing his eyes. The ghost of a warm body surrounding him taunted him. He gasped down a sob, then gasped again because that hurt like a kick to his ribs. He pressed his eyes shut around pained tears. His ribs were definitely broken. At least the pain brought him back to the present. He breathed shallowly, considered just stopping, but he had lungs in his body and there was something about how it was best to use them so he didn’t get pneumonia. They’d been through that debacle once before. Besides usually breathing was nice.

Before all this falling into a portal to a crappy dimension he would have healed by now. Another point in the should-eat-more column.

A small squeaky noise drew his attention back to his bag. Just as he blinked to clear his blurry eyes a rat exited his bag with a granola bar and sprinted across the floor into the shadows.

Danny sighed - and now he had rats.

Yeah, so these snippets aren't going to be overly long, because it's going to be faster updating this way, but once I'm more into the story I will probably compile them more before starting to post to Ao3.

Edited with link to next part: next Masterpost where you can subscribe: link

#dead on main #dp x dc #Missed connections #angst #cw depression #Danny is not doing so good #Jason is very confused #Jason is catnip to Danny

[ghost-bxrd]

Prompt:

Damian, who has just lost the last member of his family, goes off the deep end and, in a fit of violent rage, goes tumbling through a portal and back in time.

Jason doesn’t know how the scary guy with the gunshot wound became his problem but he’s not heartless enough to leave him to bleed out beside some dumpster in Crime Alley.

#Damian imprinting on Jason like a duckling #but like in reverse #grown up Damian adopting baby Jason #reverse robins in a way #Damian landing several years in the past in league outfit: #Damian’s mental stability is like a house of leaves #during a hurricane #not very stable #Jason as Damian’s emotional support kid #what do you do when there’s a highly trained assassin running around Gotham killing anybody that breathes the wrong way at his kid #right you call the bat #said Bat is very confused #look I know this prompt is similar to the last one but I needed to get this outta my system #just like the goddamn anesthesia #prompts #jason todd #batfamily #batfam #Damian wayne #Damian al ghul #Damian casually starting a new life #slowly but surely gathering his family #because we all saw what happened when he lost them #dick grayson #bruce wayne #robin #tim drake #red hood #fic #time travel

[bruciemilf]

I don’t know if this counts as a repost, so please tell me if it does , I’ll gladly take this post off, but good lord, the Harvey Dent energy this clip has

The robber is Jason btw

#it’s giving Jason trying to intimidate Harv and tf in his first week as red hood LMAOOO #text #harvey dent #two face #dc comics #genuinely I think Harvey would be a strict dad. like— Bruce is very permissive because he confuses enabling with affection #while Harvey may confuse harshness with discipline. both kinda align. #dc

[arrowmaker15]

(Bruce looking in-between Tim and Jason)

Bruce: Which one of you thought that faking a fight, a very public one, and using real blood to help, was a good idea?

Tim: *points at Jason*

Jason: *points at Tim*

Bruce: Both of you?

Tim: Jason brought it up first and I gave more ideas to make it better.

Jason: That's true.

#dc comics #incorrect quotes #incorrect dc quotes #batfam incorrect quotes #bruce wayne #tim drake #jason todd #they faked a fight #Tim gave ideas #it was very public #the citizens of Gotham are very confused as to who the villain in this fight is #Red Hood used to be the head of the mob #but Red Robin has been on the very edge of being a hero and being a villain for years now #so nobody fucking knows