#jibbs | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tragic-shadows · 1 year

Note

Can I get a fic using 7. " She had a way of making you see things differently" and 39. "You tell me how it’s your fault and I’ll tell you how you’re wrong"

Title: Mourning Period

Word Count: 1471

Warnings: Thoughts of suicide/drinking (!!! also major spoilers for anyone who hasn't watched judgement day part 1/2 !!!)

Pairings: GibbsxReader, (past GibbsxJenny)

A/N: for purposes of causing the most pain possible, let's just pretend diane and macy were dead before all of this.

He didn't know what to do, his brain was spinning in circles as he stepped around the room. He didn't dare touch anything, didn't dare breathe too hard for fear of his own scent overpowering hers. Her jacket was still draped over the bak of her chair, the fabric was soft between his fingers as he ran his hands over them. It had been a week. 7 days. 168 hours. 10,080 minutes. 604,800 seconds. Vance was moving in his stuff tomorrow. He hadn't let him sit in the chair, or at the desk, just at the conference table.

He also couldn't sit. At least not on the furniture. He found a corner beside the liquor cabinet that seemed suitable enough. Liquor and guns never mixed, and yet at the moment he had both. One in one hand and one in the other. Both of them were targeted for his head. He chose the drink first, keeping the gun close, just in case the alcohol didn't work. He drowned himself in the memories and the feelings and the touches. All the stolen glances and conversations that went on longer than they should have. All the knowing smiles and unknowing ones too. He never really loved any of his wives after Shannon. But he loved Jenny Shepard. He had always loved her, and he always would.

-

"Gibbs, breathe." You handed him a glass of water. You had come back to the office late to drop off a small box of Jenny's things that she had left at your apartment. Her house had had to be fumigated about a year ago and she had never gotten around to picking them up. The funeral was today and you figured it was time. While you were in the office, you spotted your boss sitting in the corner on the floor, a bottle and a half of scotch completely gone. "It's ok, it's gonna be ok." Now you were sitting next to him, the alcohol far out of reach, instead a glass of water and two aspirin took its place. You had also noticed his service weapon tucked in his lap, unloaded, the magazine sitting on the table in front of you. You didn't want to think about why he had it, so instead you focused your attention on him.

"I miss 'er," he slurred, head against the wall. "Loved 'er."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Mhm. She was erey' thing. Franks told me she still had feelin's. Shoulda been there. Shoulda saved 'er. Not Tony or Ziver's fault. My fault."

You sighed, reaching over to take his hand to stop him shaking. "You tell me how it's your fault and I'll tell you how you're wrong."

"My fault cause I shoulda told 'er I felt the same. Never stopped lovin' Jenny."

"I know. She was my best friend, I know."

"She ever talk 'bout me? Did ya' know?"

You gulped. She had, quite a lot actually, but you weren't sure if that was going to help the situation or make it worse. You tapped your glass a few times, thinking, before you answered. "She did. Sometimes she complained about how you never listened, but then she would tell some story and you were always the part she smiled at."

"Shoulda' told her."

"She knew."

"Then why the hell didn't she do somethin' 'bout it?"

"Probably the same reason you didn't."

You watched the way he stared at her desk. You had seen that look often, when he stared at Ziva's desk. Even though she was a great addition to the team, he missed Kate. It was also the same look he got on a single day of the year, the day Shannon and Kelly had been killed. He had loved and lost so many times you weren't sure if there was any love left for him to give.

"What was she like?" You asked. "Before I met her, before I met you. Paris."

"She had a way of making ya' see things different. We could be lookin' at a case file, I got one idea and she always had the right one. Not even that, jus' any situation she could turn 'round. I's half empty, she'd always be half full."

"What happened between you two?"

"She left." He stated plainly. The drinks had certainly gone to his head and part of you felt like asking him questions that he wouldn't like sober was wrong, but you needed him to talk. He needed to talk. He wanted to talk. "Didn't fit into her picture perfect plan. Too many loose ends, a liability." He finally knocked back the pain medicine you had set down for him.

"Is that what you think you are? A liability?"

"Why ya' ask that?"

You shrug. "I figure a self respecting, half-decent, Marine doesn't drink himself silly with a gun sitting three feet away unless he plans do to something to himself."

"Not gonna do anythin'."

"You know, for someone who's a great interrogator, you're not very good at lying." You gently laid your head on his shoulder. "Why do you think you're not good enough? I see it in your eyes all the time. When you're bossing us around, you seem like the biggest guy out there; when you sit at your desk and just look at us all, being silent Gibbs, you look like you're thinking. Like you're afraid to say the wrong thing. You don't believe in yourself."

"Everyone I love dies, Y/N. Everyone that loves me is dead."

"And why do you think that?"

"Shannon, Kelly, Kate, Diane, Macy, now Jenny?"

"You think those are the only people that love you? What about our team? Abby, Ziva? Me?"

"Don't love me like they did. Not like Jen. Miss 'er."

"I miss her too."

"Why didn't ya' save her?"

You had momentarily forgotten the fact that he was drunk and probably suicidal but the question made you realize just how much he was hurting right now. It was true, it was your fault. Well- not really your fault, you had agreed with Ziva but Tony had insisted that everything was fine and the Director could take care of herself. You shook yourself out of your head and went back to Gibbs. "You need to get home, or at least off the floor." You put his arm over your shoulder, doing your best to lift him off the ground. You made it a few steps over to the couch and helped him down. "I'll stay if you want me to. If you'd rather be alone.." You bit your lip, not really liking the idea of leaving him alone in this state. Before you could stay, a single word slipped from his lips.

"Stay."

"Ok.." You grabbed a blanket from the bottom drawer in Jenny's desk, draping it over the both of you. You wanted tea but that would mean leaving the room, and Gibbs. You counted the seconds as the clocked ticked and ticked and ticked.

The next time you looked over, his eyes were closed and his breathing had steadied. You were sore for sitting for so long and you decided getting yourself a cup of coffee would be helpful. You stood up and took a few steps but before you could get past him, he snagged the hem of your shirt.

"Huh?" You turned around.

"Wanna talk."

You nodded, understanding. "I'm going to use the restroom and get some water. You want water or a coffee?"

"Coffee. Black."

"Ok. I'll be back." You patted your hip to make sure his gun was still there next to your own.

The office was dark. Even the janitors had gone home and there was no flashlight of any of the night officers to be seen. The only light was that from the vending machines. You filled up his cup with coffee and yours with water and grabbed you each a chocolate bar. You took your time walking back upstairs, just trying to give your boss some space. You missed Jenny like hell but you had a different way of dealing with it. Instead of crying about it, you blocked it out. You clicked open the door, expecting to see Gibbs in the chair. Instead, he was curled up on the couch reading a magazine.

"You look better," you say.

"Just because I look better doesn't mean I am."

"Here." You hand him the coffee and situated yourself on the couch next to him. "I'm gonna get some sleep if you don't mind. Jenny always let me sleep on her couch when I didn't want to go home. You can stay if you want."

"Yeah."

You stayed like that for a minute or two in awkward silence when you felt tears welling at your eyes. You hadn't cried when Jenny was shot, you hadn't cried at the funeral earlier today, you couldn't remember the last time you cried, and yet here you were. About to cry. Crying. "Gibbs." you whisper. Nothing else needed to be said.

He pulled you down on the couch next to him and let you lay down, your head on his chest and his arm around you. He placed a gentle kiss on your forehead. If you didn't have each other, you weren't really sure what either of you would do. "Thank you, Y/N. Need you right now."

"I think…" you trail off, "I think I need you too."

TAGS:

@aleck-cross @ah-blossom @ilovemark1951 @marennnx @originalsoulcollector @hotchmeeeeeuppppp @kittenlittle24 @twilightlover2007 @whoreforhondo @pinkcrystal44 @marvelslut16multistangirl07 @alexxavicryry @leroyjethrogibbsgirlrl @hobbsy27-blog

#ncis x reader #ncis #leroy jethro gibbs x reader #leroy jethro gibbs #gibbs x reader #jibbs #grief/mourning

122 notes · View notes

wambsroy · 2 years

Text

Gibbs: ten years ago i married my best friend.

Gibbs: my wife’s still very angry about it but me & tobias were drunk we thought it was funny

Jenny: *sighs deeply*

#ncis #jibbs #humor #leroy jethro gibbs #jenny shepard #tobias fornell #ncis crack #married jibbs bc i love them #actually canon #source: twitter #abby sciuto #tiva #incorrect quotes #incorrect ncis quotes

275 notes · View notes

aserene · 4 months

Text

February Ills

@fluffbruary prompt for Feb. 14 (phone)

The next in the Carol's in the Night Series.

Leroy Jethro Gibbs may be a tough-ass marine but, holding a baby that had just emptied her stomach onto him, was just not intimidating. Jenny stepped down the last stair carefully biting her lip to withhold any sound that may remotely sound like laughter or giggles.

#jenny shepard #jibbs #leroy jethro gibbs #ncis

8 notes · View notes

purplelephantsarewrong · 7 months

Text