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#meanwhile im on my knees crying in the corner

ihavesomejays · 2 months

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roll with it

the aventurine trailer???? so ill so ill so ill im on my knees he had one hand behind his back the whole time i'm shaking and sobbing and yes i am aware of that one random stroke on the bottom right but i drew this all on three layers so i can't fix it sorry folks

closeups below keep reading

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vvampir3s · 7 months

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☆ One Last Kiss.

✮ pairing:

Stalker!König x fem!Reader

✮ warnings:

stalking, mentions of cnc, brief mention of murder, PLEASE tell me if i missed any 😭.

✮ word count:

1.1k words (sorry for the shortness 🙏).

✮ a/n:

couldn’t stop listening to this song, had to write this! absolutely adore the result, and the first time im posting a drabble/fic?? 🙏.

this is just the first verse!

uhh thats basically it, this was kinda self indulgent but wtv 🤷‍♀️. stalker and slasher könig fics got a chokehold on me atp 🤭.

“Heavy humid night, corner of Park and Main,”

You were sitting on the cold wooden bench, late at night. Dumped by your boyfriend a mere 15 minutes ago, just as you were about to go on a dinner date. Dressed in a short black slip on dress, your favourite navy blue heels, your hair straightened with bouncy curled ends.

Hugging your knees to your chest tight, you silently cried, unbeknownst to the man stalking walking along the park trail towards you. As you sobbed in a ball, you felt and heard the bench creak under someone’s weight, not yours, of course. Someone just sat down next to you, earning a jolt of surprise and gasp from your end.

— “Heard you were crying, ma’am.”

Said the Austrian man with a gruff voice, placing a handkerchief in your small palm. His touch lingered for a brief moment, before pulling away almost sheepishly. Despite his hardened appearance at the moment, his eyes softened upon seeing your teary bloodshot eyes.

He fucking hated seeing you cry. His little taube, no one and nothing deserved her mere breath. He would slaughter the scum who even think to upset her, let alone make her cry. Or maybe, he had already done it.

— “Thank you..?”

You sniffled, feeling yourself burn with shame for crying in a public setting. Alone. At night, in the pouring rain for gods sake. With an obsessive piece of shit following you.

“Cast that first glance, your smile, my veins,”

He thought his heart would burst. Just as you wiped your tears away, cleaned your nose free of snot, you looked to him with a soft, appreciative, painfully angelic smile. He should’ve known what he was getting into. His veins boiling, his heart pounding, his mind racing with a multitude of thoughts, mostly perversions.

— “No problem, mein liebling.”

He said with a small nod, leaning back against the bench. It was silent between the two of you, only the noise of the rain pouring down to fill the void. But you enjoyed it nonetheless, putting your knees back down, crossing a leg over the other, with your hands resting in your lap.

You couldn’t help but look him over, noticing large, muscular beefy build. One of a Greek god at that, really. His black combat boots, large grey hoodie, and black cargo pants. Unfortunately, his face concealed by a sniper hood. He had his sleeves rolled up slightly, his large, somewhat veiny, calloused hands in view for you to ogle at.

“At maximum capacity, blood pumpin' so fast,”

He knew you were staring. God, just the feeling of your eyes on him had him overdosing on pleasure. On one hand, he wanted to take you home, shower you with love and affection, wife you up, have a little family back in Austria, practically domestic you all for himself.

On the other hand… he was fighting back the sickening urge to just take you here and there, lap at you like a starved man, make you gag on his monster of a fucking dick, fill you to the brim with his seed, paint your walls—

All the while you thought you were being sneaky about it, he simply acted oblivious. Believably enough, too.

Snapping out of your trance like state, you were about to call for a taxi to drive you home. Meanwhile, he put his left arm over the top of the back bench, practically wrapping his arm around your shoulders. He rested his arm there, slouching back and spreading his legs out comfortably.

— “What happened, schatz? I’m all yours.”

— “Pardon me, sir?”

Did he just say that? Fuck, it slipped from his tongue. Whatever, act natural. His little liebe is too innocent to see past his ill intentions.

— “I’m all ears.”

Must’ve been your imagination, or the rain messing with your ears. He seemed like a nice man, right?

“My girl, if looks gave heart attacks,”

— “You’ll make fun of me, sir.”

— “I would never, mein kleiner liebling. No need to adress me as sir. Just König.”

You poured out your heart to him. Your shitty boyfriend who just dumped you, left you here to rot after planning a whole date with you, giving you a half-assed apology of “I’m so sorry, I don’t have feelings anymore,” when really, he just got bored of you.

Tears pricking the corners of your eyes, your bottom lip quivering, your eyebrows creasing throughout the whole explanation.

Just one more word about your shitty ex would send you reeling back into a hot mess of sobbing and crying. You couldn’t help it, as the pathetic, naive, and desperate little girl you always have been.

König listened. He nodded along, adding a few words of “I’m sorry about that,” and “You deserve so much more than him, hase.” You knew he was speaking another language, but not sure what he was saying. It sounded sweet and comforting, so you appreciated it nonetheless.

His fucking blood was boiling. Not like before, when he was overheating with lust, love, and pleasure for you. No, now he was fucking pissed.

How your ex used you with his pathetic little 10cm dick, never gave you attention, barely ever looked your way? Slept with other useless dirty whores, all the while you adored him with all you had?

Fuck, he’d treat you so right. He’d fuck you just right as well. The thought of you with him got him hard, whether that be willing or not, friends or foes. He hated himself for the lack of control, but you were an irresistible little thing.

But paired along with that anger, was fear. You loved another man so easily, who was to say another couldn’t just sweep you off your feet? He couldn’t imagine you with another man, hand in hand, kissing, hugging, fucking. It drove him mad. Fucking mad with obsession and possession.

That’s it, he decided. Whoever was to lay a hand on you, speak a word of romantic affection for you, or even think of you romantically, will fucking face his wrath. He was a literal colonel, a fucking beast.

— “I’m so sorry that happened to you, liebste. Say, how about I take you out, a harmless little dinner? To make up for your shitty boyfriend.”

You couldn’t believe it. He was really about to take you out, after hearing your sob story of a ex?

— “I… would love that, really. Thank you so much, König.”

He walked alongside you, listening to you rabble on. He couldn’t get enough of you.

Hearing you say his name was enough, for now. But soon enough, you’ll be mewling his name over and over as he’d pound into you relentlessly, hot tears streaming down your face.

All he had to do now was take you on a little date, take you back to his place, and fuck you dumb.

Ah, after he cleaned up your ex boyfriend’s dead body in the basement of his house. Forgot about that part.

#könig x you #könig x reader #yandere könig #könig fanfiction #könig x y/n #older könig #obsessive love #stalker könig

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vxiphoid · 11 months

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MISTY COMPREHENSION

❨ summary ❩ genshin › second chance. (ft. cyno)

tags ✧ angst/comfort to fluff, modern au, crying, guilt, mentions of an argument, overthinking, a bit of a soft cyno, second chance trope, nb reader, happy ending dw!!

amanuensis’ message ⊹ KICKING, SCREAMING, CRYING, THIS WAS SO HARD TO WRITE. i was really thinking about this song actually. i listened to it over and over, it gave me second chance vibes and i have no idea why… i didn’t want it to be full angst though. im still a little rusty with my writing and just barely grasping the strings but i hope this is enjoyable😋

⌜ 1k ⌟

♫ karma - sarah kinsley

genshin masterlist

CYNO

ʏᴏᴜʀ ꜱᴜᴘᴇʀꜱᴛɪᴛɪᴏɴ ᴋᴇᴇᴘꜱ ᴍᴇ ᴛʜɪɴᴋɪɴɢ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀꜱ ᴋᴀʀᴍᴀ ʙᴜᴛ ɪ ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ʟɪꜱᴛᴇɴ, ᴍʏ ɪɴᴛᴜɪᴛɪᴏɴ ꜱᴀʏꜱ ɪ ᴡᴀɴᴛ ʏᴏᴜ.

— its been about three months since you and cyno’s departure. the argument was loud, reckless, and honestly? both of you got some hurtful words in. yet when he got a text from you, asking for a bit of his time to accompany you to the newly opening cafe for brunch, who is he to refuse? he owes you that much and so much more after what he’s put you through.

what could he say? what was even is there to say? the tension was so thick you could slice it with a butterknife, tension so thick he could drown in it if he really tried. his mind ran wild, he couldn’t concentrate on anything but you. you sat on the other side of the private booth, your knee pressing just barely against his under the table. yet you sat calm, composed, enjoying the slice of cake you ordered, none the wiser to the swirling emotions webbing themselves on the insides of his head. no words were exchanged for the eight minutes you’ve sat with him yet you couldn’t have looked more relaxed meanwhile cyno is on the edge of his seat.

you fork some of your cake, gathering a dollop of frosting on the sweetened sponge before pointing your fork at him. he wouldn’t blame you if it was accusatory. “weren’t you busy?” you asked, waving your utensil expectantly.

“free for you.” cyno eyed it, gingerly taking the portion into his mouth. it was perfect, the rich sweetness dripping down his tongue to taste it all the way down to the core of his stomach. something flavory, something you would choose. leaning over the table, you swipe frosting from the corner of his lip, licking your thumb clean afterwards. “can’t say the same for others.” he says matter of factly.

your eyes widened a fraction at his response yet relaxed as quick as it came. your palm held your cheek as you let out an approving hum, the smallest of smiles gracing your lips. “you always did know what to say.” you say softly, your gaze falling to his lips. his throat felt dry, like sandpaper was scraping across it.

he swallows hard, trying to get rid of the lump in his throat. “i know you well.”

with that your eyes darted back to your dessert, leaving the poor man to breath correctly again. your actions spoke that you were fine, the silence however, was anything but. this was far too familiar territory for cyno and it made his skin crawl in discomfort. not that he could blame you, it was him that caused the parting. yet somehow, despite everything you still planned this, despite everything he said. you wanted to at least attempt to fix things, that gave him some dim flame of hope. he wanted to be the first to say something, to atone.

“i’m sorr—“

you meet eyes. your expression softening and he can see the hurt in your eyes but it quickly dissipates, replaced with an emotionless facade. “you start first.” you insist, taking another bite of cake.

“right.” he murmurs, clearing his throat before speaking again, his tone firm but not unkind. “i’m sorry. for everything i’ve said because you surely didn’t deserve any of it. i was angry after i came back to you, and still took it out on you by screaming at you when you were only trying to help me. i promise you, you didn’t do anything wrong.”

the words he said to you were a blur from months but they still haunt him. they must’ve been horrible because the expression that sunk your being had his body run cold, like an ice cube dropped into steaming hot coco. and as the ice cube chipped and shattered so did his heart. work kept pulling and pulling and pulling him away from you until the last fatal string had snapped. the realization and guilt didn’t set in until you slammed the door. cyno remembers waiting by the front door, silently begging you to walk back in. praying that you didn’t leave him for good. he remembers the pain that flashed across your face and how you didn’t return to him. even after weeks passed without seeing you, he remembers how it tore him apart. how it drove him insane, left him restless and unable to breathe. and most importantly, how it nearly ripped you in two—

“cy,” you place a reassuring hand over his that was absentmindedly clenching over the table, snapping out of his revere. “its okay.” you continue, brushing away the stray tears that were yet to spill over his cheeks. “i understand. i was angry and confused too, we both were. i understand.”

“but i’m sorry.” he mutters all too desperately, something that your heart wasn’t used to seeing. “i don’t think i’ll ever be able to forgive myself for what i did to you.”

you could feel the pull of your eyebrows as you inhaled shakily, tears threatening your very being. you wanted to be strong, hoping that meant no tears that could make cyno doubt your honesty, not that he would. you’ve both spent so much time building and nurturing this relationship for it to come crumbling down like this. but you also knew you were also the one responsible, you were also the one who pushed cyno away; you didn’t know what he was going through or why he lashed out at you. and it broke your heart knowing that he thought that you blamed him. that you hated him for feeling. you’ve spent so much time and you sure as hell weren’t going to let it wither like this.

you stood, rounding the table to settle down on his side of the booth. your eyes never left his as you take his hand and intertwined your fingers. “and that’s completely valid. but i forgive you, and i’ll be there to help you forgive yourself if that’s what you really want. no more hiding shit. promise.” you say softly, your voice wavering in the middle. your eyes are full of emotion yet there was no judgement, no anger, nothing negative. just the same person who loved him through and through. enough to make his vision blur from tears, enough to make his chest ache. the amount of love you have for him makes him choke, his throat constricting almost painfully.

you wipe the tears from his eyes with the pad of your thumb before wrapping your arms around him yet he still beats you with the tightness of his embrace. his tears soiled your shoulder but that was the least of your worries as you bury your face in his snowy hair. oh, who knew. the man who is known for his stern attitude and dangerous gaze, sobbing so heavily against you.

a watery smile wobbles its way onto your face, your hand caressing the back of his head. “sorrows, sorrows, prayers.” you mope dramatically earning a jab in the stomach from cyno.

“shut up.” he says weakly but in the corner of your eye showed you a softened grin.

the two of you stayed like that, unmoving; a comforting touch to soothe the turmoil that plagued the both of you. it took some time for your own tears to subside, but when you finally did you leaned your forehead against cyno’s and closed your eyes. it was silent between the two of you, save for the occasional sniffle here and there.

“can i ask you something?” you hum in response to his question, “if i were to make a joke right now, how would you react?”

a small chuckle left your lips, “i would leave.”

“how could you say that? :(”

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clover0101 · 9 months

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I saw a yumeship week on twt so im hoping in even if mine is oc x canon idk the differences anymore

Day 1: first meeting!! I made a drabble and a sketch for this

(click expand to read)

The shouts, complaints, and arguments filled the common area of MILGRAM, which, despite being quite large, seemed to shrink more and more for the blue-haired boy. The footsteps of the other prisoners echoed along with the crying of some, others remained apart trying to think rationally about what was happening, but the only certain thing here is that nothing was rational.

Everyone woke up in an unfamiliar place, wearing prisoner's clothes, assigned numbers and cells, and given a brief explanation of why they were there - they had all ended someone's life, and it’s time for them to get their judgement. One group protested the accusation, another part accepted it and decided to remain silent. Despite listening carefully, Haruka could not fully understand it. The place seemed to function in a strange way, to say the least, and he had always been a bit slow to comprehend strange things.

The danger of the unknown and the nerves that interacting with others bring led him to just take a seat in one corner of the room, watching the chaos come and go in front of him. He hugged his knees, trying to make himself smaller. Sudden movements made him startle, but he couldn’t react in any other way, he didn’t want to leave his precious 'refuge' out of fear of bothering others. After all, he was different, and even if he wanted to contribute, he surely couldn’t do anything...

His thoughts were interrupted by a red-haired boy, who had apparently been arguing with a brunette man; "Hey, the guy in the corner!” he pointed directly at Haruka, taking steps that seemed intimidating towards the younger boy. The other man followed him closely. "This loser here says it would be better to wait and see what’s happening, but I think we should find the guard and kick their ass already. What do you say? We need strong people on our side."

"I don't think we could solve it just like that..." The brown-haired boy scratched the back of his neck, an uncomfortable smile on his face.

"Uh..." Haruka opened his mouth, trying to say something. Someone was talking to him... These two guys were looking at him right now. His heart was pounding from anxiety and he clenched his fists, his nails digging into his already wounded flesh. "I, uh, um... Ah, n-no... I-I D-"

"Pffft. Nevermind," the redhead interrupted before he could even finish the sentence, turning his back and returning to where the rest of the group was. You can't count on anyone here, he thought. Meanwhile, the other boy waved goodbye to Haruka, who hunched over and buried his face between his knees, closing his eyes tightly. He had barely arrived and already disappointed someone? This can’t be happening.

He remained silent for several more minutes, his eyes fluttering open when the argument seemed to calm down. A person was looking at him over their shoulder, their appearance standing out among the others due to an eyepatch and big, bright red eyes that seemed to stare right into his soul. They approached Haruka slowly, almost carefully to not to scare him, which made the boy slowly straighten up a bit, but not enough to make eye contact.

"Hey," their gentle voice made the boy startle even if they tried not to. "I know this can be hard to understand, you see, I'm a little scared too!" they accompanied their attempt at socializing with a laugh, standing beside him and leaning their back against the wall, their hands fidgeting restlessly in front of them.

A few seconds of silence passed, in which Haruka debated if he should even speak. His companion quickly realized, and just continued; "You don't talk much... right? Well, you might be lucky, because people often tell me I talk a lot!" they smiled, extending their hand downwards. "My name is Matsuo Hikaru, but you can just call me Hikaru. What's yours?"

He blinked a couple times, glancing out of the corner of his eye at Hikaru's pale hands, adorned with every color he could imagine, contrasting with the simple and plain prison uniform. He squirmed in his place, looking down again, embarrassed. He wasn’t able to look at them in the eye, fearing disappointing them as he did with the other man earlier. "Uh... My name is Haruka... Haruka Sakurai." he managed to murmur after a while of silence, daring to try to look the prisoner in the eye, but quickly glanced away again. "N-Nice to meet you, uh, Hikaru..." Is this what people say after introducing themselves? He shook his head, chewing on his lower lip.

"Ah! Haruka-kun is a cute name! And your hair is also quite cute, it reminds me of lobelias!" Hikaru extended their hands again, waving them as they spoke. The blue-haired boy ducks his head self-conciously, a faint blush tinting his cheeks at the praise. Why was this person being so nice to him? "Everything that's happening is strange, but I'm sure it'll turn out well... For you guys, at least," Haruka didn't fully understand what Hikaru meant by those last words, but for the first time in their encounter he looked up and nodded. He thought that, at the very least, Hikaru deserved that from him. For giving him some attention. "Ah, of course, Haruka-kun! We must be more optimistic. Not like that idiot over there, he's just giving everyone a headache."

Their complaint made Haruka's eyes open wide. He would never dare speak about anyone like that, much less if they could hear him. Still, he laughed a little, enjoying the conversation, even though the one talking the most was Hikaru. "Hah... I-I guess you're right..."

#milgram #haruka sakurai #art #my art #milgram fanart #ocgram #hikaru matsuo #haruhika #haruhika week

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beladeprived · 3 years

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Pocky Game

with the gremlin daughters + alcina, donna and angie

Warning/s: none :] its fun

i didnt mean for this to be a something like a fic but oH WELL. also tagging my good friend @donnasdimples for helping me with some parts! (this was supposed to just be like an hc but 😭)

You were bored out of your life. You had finished all your chores for the day so you were just relaxing in your chambers but oh boy were you starving. So you pull your locked drawer and take out a box of Pocky sticks for yourself...when a slightly mischievous idea hits you.

You smiled to yourself as you pulled yourself out of your bed and outside into the kitchen where the three, beloved daughters of Lady Alcina Dimitrescu were bickering at.

"Ladies!" You beamed and it stopped their bickering. All three heads turning to look at you," Would you like to play the pocky game with me?"

"P-pocky game?" Bela tilted her head to the side, her cheeks tinted with a light shade of pink as if she knew what the game was.

"Is it a kissing game?!" Daniela excitedly jumped, a huge smile plastered on her face.

"Kinda?" You replied, quite unsure of the explanation forming in your head," You put one end of a pocky stick in your mouth while the other end is in my mouth and we slowly bite at it until one of us couldn't take it anymore so we break it,"

An amused smirk formed on Cassandra's crimson red lips,"Ooh, im intrigued. Let's play,"

"Who goes first?" Daniela asks, eyes open and expectant to be first.

"What about Lady Bela?" You turn to the said person and she steps forward, nodding her head. And you swear you saw Daniela cross her arms and pout.

Bela steps forward and you take a single pocky stick from the box. You bite on your end with a smile and you look up to see Bela's cheeks flushed red. She anxiously (and carefully) bites on her end of the stick as a grin formed on her face. She slowly blinked as her amber gaze remained focused on yours. You end up taking turns with Bela in biting the stick. The two of you kept biting until you were just a few centimeters apart from each other, and from there you saw Bela start to lose her cool. Her cheeks were much more red than before and honestly? You were kind of the same. Neither of you dared to move then, neither of you dared to break the stick. You both just stood there, waiting for one another to make a move.

Honestly it just took forever with the two of you that Cassandra had to push her sister out of the way, causing the stick to (sadly) break.

You quickly bite on another stick since you felt Cassandra's impatience in the air. She quickly bit her end of the stick and to your surprise, you immediately found her lips latched onto yours. You heard Bela cough and Daniela whistle moments before Cassandra pulled out. You were in a daze, and confused since you saw that the whole Pocky stick remained unbroken.

"Oops, I forgot," Cassandra snickered, biting off part of the stick and chewing on it as she turned around to laugh more.

You sighed, rubbing your face free of the heat. Cassandra, to you, really is often overwhelming. You never complained though, you kinda loved it anyway.

"My turn!" Daniela happily exclaimed, taking the initiative to pull a pocky stick from the box and biting on her end almost too quickly.

You stood there, staring at her with a grin on your lips. The action amused you, but also terrified you. Who knows what kind of tricks Daniela has up her sleeve?

"C'mon, Y/N!!" She muffledly called, beckoning you over to hurry up and bite on your end so you could start with the game already.

"Okay, okay," You chuckled, taking your end of the Pocky stick in your mouth. You soon bite on it, signaling the start of the game. And an overexcited Daniela tried to bite too much that she ended up poking the back of her throat with it. Her beautiful face twisted into a hilarious expression where her tongue accidentally slipped out of her mouth as she gagged on the Pocky stick.

Daniela's little accident caused all of you to break down in fits of loud laughter. Cassandra ended up with her knees on the floor as she gave it hard, sloppy slaps. Bela had to cover her face due to secondhand embarrassment and you just couldn't stop laughing you had to put your arms around your belly. Meanwhile Daniela recovered after a moment and started scowling at everyone in a loud voice. Though Daniela suddenly burst into a fit of giggles as she tackled a teary-eyed Cassandra on the floor.

It was at that fun moment when the castle doors creaked open revealing a very tall vampire lady and a veiled woman carrying a porcelain doll in her arms.

"What is going on here?" Alcina asked, her expression curious as her gaze fell on the laughing mess.

"Mother!" Bela beamed, still trying to contain her laughter," We were just playing the Pocky game and Daniela gagged on it!"

"Hey!" Daniela yelled, throwing a pillow she picked up from the couch.

Bela's statement caused another round of genuine laughter and a content sigh from Alcina.

"Aunt Donna!" Daniela smiled, waving.

"Oh! Lady Beneviento," You greeted the veiled woman, bowing down to her," My apologies for the mess,"

"Pocky game!" The doll, Angie blurted out of the blue," I want to play too!"

"So, how does this 'Pocky game' work, my darlings?" Alcina asked, an amused look on her face as the four of you explained the mechanics of the game to her.

Alcina held up a hand, sitting down on the couch," Come now, I want to try too,"

You saw Donna sit on the other end of the couch along with Angie. You inhale before you pull out a stick, putting it in your mouth and then you went to stand right infront of Alcina. She took her end in her mouth and the moment the stick was in between her teeth, she immediately took a bite at it. Her eyes teased you and you were unable to break eye contact, let alone bite down. From the corner of your eye, you saw her mouth curl up into a smirk.

Your heart was hammering in your chest. Heck, you were playing the Pocky game with your boss. Alcina's face was only an inch away from you when she broke the stick and stood up.

"Have to go now, darlings," She smirked, walking up the stairs," Have fun with Aunt Donna,"

You cleared your throat," Yes my Lady,"

Your boss just teased the life out of you in a Pocky game and you felt so embarrassed you had to once more rub your face free of heat. You thought it was time to say goodbye so you could retreat back into your chambers but the youngest daughter spoke up.

"Aunt Donna! Wanna play with Y/N too???" Daniela smiled, looking straight at the veiled woman.

"C'mon it's fun," Cassandra grinned," Just don't be like Daniela and gag on your stick!"

You saw Daniela scowl and Angie look at Donna, waiting for an answer.

"But i'm too shy...," Donna hesitated, turning her head to the side.

"Do you want me to go first so you could warm up to the game?" Angie asked, looking at Donna.

There was a short pause before Donna replied," Okay,"

"Great!" Angie bounced. Her little feet tapping on the ground as she reached for you. You picked her up with your arms after you pulled a stick. Once it was settled in both of your mouths, Angie began biting too fast. She bit too much in a short amount of time that you both weren't aware of how close she is to you until you felt sharp pain on your lips.

Angie accidentally clipped your lips.

"Oh no," Donna panicked, quickly standing up to pry Angie off of your lips.

You let out a soft cry as your lips were trapped in between Angie's wooden mouth, earning a hilarious round of laughter from everyone except Donna.

"Holy shit," Cassandra cackled as she turned to face the wall.

Soon, Angie was pried off of you by Donna and you mumbled a soft "thank you" as you touched your slightly red lips.

"See, Donna?" Angie maniacally laughed," You just have to give Y/N a little smooch!"

That wasn't just a little smooch all right.

"Miss Donna?" You asked, dabbing a wet napkin on your lips," Do you still want to play?"

"I'm still too shy, Y/N...," She sighed," B-but sure. I'll play,"

Everyone cheered as you took out another stick from the box, placing it where it should be. Donna decided to play as long as she keeps her veil on, and you could only see her lips and everything else was covered.

You started biting slowly and Donna never bit. She just stood there. You were halfway into the stick and Donna still hasn't bit at all.

"Donna???" Angie pulled on her leg, but Donna gave no response," Oh dear,"

Bela stepped forward and tried to shake Donna's shoulder. Then the stick broke and Donna fell straight on her back, causing her veil to show a part of her super red, flushed cheek.

"Did...Did she-," Bela asked, pointing at Donna's body.

"...Did she...," Cassandra blinked.

"Did she faint?" Daniela asked the whole question and it was answered the moment Angie poked Donna's cheek.

"OH DEAR SHE FAINTED," Angie blurted out, her voice laced with panic.

You could only cover your mouth while everyone else shared another round of hearty laughter.

#resident evil village #bela dimitrescu #cassandra dimitrescu #daniela dimitrescu #alcina dimitrescu #donna beneviento #angie beneviento #bela dimitrescu x reader #cassandra dimitrescu x reader #daniela dimitrescu x reader #alcina x reader #alcina x maiden #donna beneviento x reader #donna x reader #comedy #resident evil 8

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heeberry · 3 years

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It’s Not What You Think

(Loona) Jung Jinsoul x Female!Reader

Requested: yes!

Berry: Hello may I ask for Jinsoul x fem!reader angst where reader spends time with a member a bit too much cause they're planning a surprise for Jinsoul but JInsoul ends up thinking reader is cheating and confronts them about it. Reader feels conflicted and says smth along the lines of "Im not that kind of person" but they make up after a long ass deliberation. Sorry if it's a bit much, thank you!!

A/n: don’t worry berry it wasn’t too much at all!! Sorry for writing this late </3 it’s a tiny bit rushed so if you don’t like it let me know and I’ll write it again :]

Jinsoul crossed her arms, slumped up against the couch. She huffed, watching you and Chaewon huddled on the couch across from her, giggling and doing things on the computer.

The Tv was just background music to her at this point, her eyes drilling a hole between you and Chaewon. You glanced at the girl, but soon looked back at the computer, her gaze was enough to tell you that she wasn’t having it. It sure was scary to you, not familiar with her angry side. Jinsoul was usually sweet and affectionate, but what you saw was the complete opposite, which you knew why, but you can’t really do anything about it at the moment.

“Y/n ignore her, we have to focus” Chaewon snapped you out of your thoughts, you nodded at her words, going back to picking out decorations online.

Jinsoul’s birthday was just tomorrow, so to show some appreciation you decided to throw a party for her. You picked Chaewon to help you since she’d been hanging out with Jinsoul often, and because you two were the closest ones in the dorm.

At first Jinsoul didn’t mind, she knew how close the two of you were so she let you be. But as time passed she noticed how less you spent time with her, which made her heart ache.

“Should we get those confett shooters?”

“Why not” you laughed, adding it to your chart.

After checking the items out and paying you turned to Chaewon. “Do you think Jinsoul’s mad at me right now?” You suddenly asked.

Chaewon glanced at Jinsoul, she was talking to Heejin but her expression still showed how upset she was. Chaewon turned back to you, with a slight smile, “yeah probably” she paused “still don’t let that get in the way right now, the decorations are coming tomorrow so we have to plan out how we’re gonna surprise Jinsoul”

You nodded, though there was something telling you that talking to her won’t hurt, it’s not like your avoiding her with bad intentions. “I’ll just talk to her for a few” you whispered after noticing Heejin leaving and going towards the kitchen.

“Jinsoul!” You cheered, climbing on her to give her a tight hug. “Are you okay?”

Jinsoul kept her mouth shut, she tried not letting the warmth of the hug get to her. As much as she was desperate to wrap her arms around you she contained it, wanting to let you know how upset she was.

You cup her face, turning it to face you. “What happened? Why aren’t you talking?”

Jinsoul scoffed at your words, brushing your hands off. She pulled you off of her, getting up without a word and leaving.

You felt a pang in your heart, you must’ve really made her upset. Tomorrow was her birthday too, and having this happen wasn’t apart of the plan.

Walking back to Chaewon with a frown, you hugged your best friend. She pats your head, witnessing the whole scene. “It’s okay y/n, she won’t stay mad at you for long. Your her girlfriend anyway.”

Chaewon put an arm around you, squeezing your cheeks. “She’ll probably be like, oh my baby y/n! I’m so sorry for being mad, this is amazing!” You laughed at Chaewon’s words as she continued, “thank you so much! Seriously babe, I wasn’t expecting this!” Pointing at the computer as if there was something valuable actually there.

You kept laughing with her, eyes closed shut and holding your stomach. She knew how to comfort you for sure, as she soon laughed with you.

As much as the two of you were having a good time, someone in the corner surely wasn’t. Jinsoul stared, stunned at what she just heard. “Did she just? Call y/n, babe?” She mumbled to herself, recalling Chaewon’s words and use of physical affection.

Now Jinsoul knew she had to do something. Her heart immediately smashed into pieces, like a hammer hitting glass. She felt like she was stepping on lava, feeling betrayed and hurt.

She walked into her room, the door slamming so loud that the two of you were awoken from your own little worlds.

You cleared the tears on your face, “alright Chae, let’s inform the others about what their roles are”

...

The next day rolled around and you felt excited. Removing the covers off of you and heading towards Jinsoul’s room to greet her a happy birthday. You knocked twice and opened the door, greeted by the coolness of the ac that was in her room. You jumped on her bed, “Jinsoul get up!” You laughed. Ruffling her hair as she woke up.

Her face dropped when she saw you, but you didn’t seem to notice. “Happy birthday babe!” You cheered, peppering her face with kisses.

Though Jinsoul didn’t seem as excited as you, pulling you away from her face she got up without a word. You stared at her, “the silent treatment again?” You frowned.

You couldn’t tell how upset she was, surely you did spend less time with her but that usually happens whenever the both of you are busy anyway, how come she’s suddenly like this now?

“Jinsoul!” You whined, grabbing her hand before she stepped out the door, “why are you suddenly ignoring me?”

Jinsoul kept her anger inside, if she dared to open her mouth she knew she’d explode. You pushed her around and attempted to hug her, Jinsoul just stood, letting it all happen.

Soon enough you grew tired and annoyed, “can you just tell me what happened to you?” You snapped. “You’ve been ignoring me since yesterday giving me the silent treatment, what’s up with that?”

Jinsoul turned to you with a scoff, “are kidding me?”

You raised an eyebrow, “what?”

“You’ve been the one ignoring me! What’s up with that” she mimicked, “since last week you’ve been clinging onto Chaewon like I don’t exist”

“God every single day I’ve seen you with her and the two of you are giggling like there’s no tomorrow” Jinsoul’s voice kept getting higher and higher, with each word hitting you in the face.

“I mean at first I didn’t mind of course since she’s your best friend but yesterday was where the line was crossed” Jinsoul yelled, ruffling her own hair.

She paused, her vision becoming more blurry from the tears forming in her eyes. She sniffled before pointing a finger, “YOU CHEATED ON ME”

You gasped but before you could even speak Jinsoul cut you.

“I saw it all L/n Y/n. Chaewon calling you babe to the two of you acting all lovey dovey. Don’t act like you guys didn’t do that yesterday because I saw it with my own two eyes!”

“Jinsoul I-”

“Don’t Jinsoul me, I don’t care about your explanation. What I saw was as clear as day and for that we’re breaking up right here and now” Jinsoul snapped, “Don’t you dare try coming to me again, go hang out with your new girlfriend.”

Jinsoul headed towards the door, which made you panic, forgetting what things were prepared outside. “Wait Jinsoul!” You yelled, yanking her away from the door.

It was now the other way around, you stood in front of her with tears in your eyes. “Soulie please here me out, it’s not what you think! Please”

Jinsoul leaned against the bed, a sigh escaping her lips. She kept her tough imagine outside but inside was filled with hurt and sorrow. Not only did she caught you with Chaewon, seeing you like this also made her weak in the knees. But she kept it in, gesturing you to talk.

“I swear I didn’t cheat on you” you paused to wipe the tears that spilled down your eyes like a waterfall. “What you saw yesterday was Chaewon mimicking you I promise!”

“But why?”

“Because we were getting things for you and while doing so we started talking about you”

Jinsoul scoffed again, “yeah right like I’ll believe such a thing now”

She walked towards the door again, leaving you crying on the floor. Jinsoul opened the door to see Chaewon and the others with party hats on. Usually on birthdays you’d cheer and scream, but this moment in particular wasn’t what they did.

It was silent, the members heard everything. They stood there with frowns or blank faces. The house was decorated with balloons and all sorts of things. A cake sat perfectly on the table, candles sitting on it with the words, “Happy Birthday Jinsoul!” Written in blue, the color she liked.

Jinsoul’s jaw dropped when she saw everything decorated. Chaewon frowned, breaking the silence. “we were together to plan out your birthday”

She turned to you, your cheeks puffed out and eyes bloodshot red from continuessly crying.

Jinsoul looked at her members apologetically before going towards you. Closing the door behind her, she crouched down to hug you.

“Well what now?” Yeojin spoke, breaking the silence. “I think we should go, things will get better later so let’s leave them alone for now” Haseul replied.

“what about the activities we planned?” Yerim added, “we didn’t make reservations for nothing”

“We’ll do what we planned later stupid, they need each other right now” Heejin said, rushing the members to sit in the living room and wait.

Meanwhile you smacked Jinsoul, “I told you! I told you we weren’t doing anything romantic” you frowned, “why would you even accuse me of cheating when I literally cling onto you 24/7?”

Jinsoul kissed you, “I’m so sorry for yelling at you, I knew I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that”

You shook your head, “it isn’t your fault, I mean, I was technically the one ignoring you but only because I didn’t wanna accidently spoil the surprise for you”

Jinsoul grabbed your hand, getting you up on your two feet before smiling at you. “Let’s pretend that never happened yea?”

You nodded, and Jinsoul pecked you on the lips. “Next time I’ll hear you out instead of yelling at you like a total idiot”

“Yeah you definitely should next time”

Once the door of Jinsoul’s room opened it was like nothing never really happened. The members stood there shooting confetti and shouting happy birthday.

You laughed at their antics, turning to Jinsoul to give her a rightful kiss. “Happy Birthday my love, and don’t you ever think I’d cheat on you”

157 notes · View notes

heyitsyn · 3 years

Text

RANDOM SEIJOH HCs ACCORDING TO GIGI

a/n: this is a thing i cooked up between doing trig exam and ap gov review akdsjfldskfj

IM PRETTY SURE I ALREADY USED THIS GIF BUT IM WANTING TO RE-DO MY ENTIRE PAGE AND MAKING BANNERS SO THIS IS A TEMPORARY THING AJDJDJJD ALSO I DONT KNOW HOW TO DO THE KEEP READING THING ON THE APP BYE

oikawa def listens to indie music just bc he wants to feel unique and the 'iM diFfErENt fRoM oTHeR gUrLs' vibes

i FIRMLY BELIEVE IWAIZUMI HAJIME IS ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE WHO CHOMPS ON HIS ICE CREAM BC HE LIKES TO FEEL THE COLD ON HIS TEETH AKSJSKSKSK

meanwhile kunimi eats a kitkat like its pizza just CHOMP

makki caNNOT sleep without a pillow between his thighs LIKE LISTEN he has 2 sisters and they all told him its so comfortable and at first he was like,, ??,, then he tried and now cant sleep without it

bUT MATTSUN LIKES TO SLEEP WITH PILLOWS SURROUNDING HIM bc it makes him feel safe and like there are two body pillows on either side of him and hes kinda trapped in the middle aksjskdk

when kyo was younger, he was really short and although he had other pants, he loved this one pair but they were really long on him and he wore it all the time and the part of the pants that touched the ground is torn in shreds

kindaichi steps on the sofa before sitting LIKE puts one foot on the cushion then the other until hes literally standing on the couch before folding to sit with his knees up to his chest (i do this)

watari sniffs his food before eating it no matter if its something he eats all the time or something new, he still sniffs it either way

yahaba is really particular with his feet and he likes to get a really big tupperware (duh one only meant for his feet) and fill it up with warm almost boiling water and he just soaks them

oikawa has sleep paralysis and he oftens hallucinates about aliens in the corner of his room

kunimi does this thing where he makes weird noises with his mouth like sounds of his mouth opening LIKE when youre tastinf something new and you do that sound with your tongue (I DUNNO HOW TO DESCRIBE IT AJDKSKKD)

makki bends his knees just to crack his ankles

iwa sneezes a ton but he has those sneezes where theyre quiet that you dont even notice or really loudly that it just echoes throughout the gym

kyo sleeps with one sock on bc his feet gets cold easily but both socks make him feel really hot so only one sock is perfect

for a tall and hunk of a guy, mattsun is a very light walker like his footsteps are very light and if he wants to, it can be practically silent

watari actually hates vegetables ajssksksk he particularly hates zucchini, eggplants, any vegetables that are that shape

kindaichi likes to stick or lean against walls because to him, they feel cold and can decrease his body heat

oikawa stands and places his feet at V position like \/ instead of ll because his sister did ballet and he was taught that was the right way of standing and it was considered graceful

yahaba has a fear of cactuses

mattsun does so badly in the heat because his body temp runs so high and the hot surroundings make him feel so uncomfortable and so he takes a lot of cold showers

iwa cannot swim like he freaks out immediately when his toetips can no longer feel the bottom and he panics with thoughts of drowning

watari has really small feet that he still buys big kids shoes to save money

kyotani considered playing baseball because he thought baseball bats were cool but he got angry and threw tantrum after missing his first pitch

iwa chomps on a whole raw chili while eating ramen akskksks

oikawa actually hates sweets bc when he was younger, he had cavities and iwa showed him a cartoon of cavities eating his teeth and will make him toothless

kindaichi really really likes hugs but hes too awkward to ask them even from his parents

yahaba chomps on mints so he goes through boxes of them in a week

i feel like theres a boy in the team who doesnt brush their teeth everyday and rubs a towel on their teeth to make it look clean and take mints to hide their bad breath

iwaizumi is actually iron deficient so he bruises super super fast and he even developed iron defiency anemia when he was younger bc his parents didnt catch on which caused him to be put on strong medication for months and still takes it now

WAIT,, OIKAWA IS LACTOSE INTOLERANT BUT HE LIKES MILK SO HE EATS MILK BREAD TO MAKE HIM FEEL NOT SO BAD OR GUILTY OF CONSUMING STRAIGHT DAIRY

seijoh four bonding time is watching gordom ramsey shows and yelling and screaming 'YEA! EXACTLY!' as if theyre also cooking genuises

watari used to eat grapes all the time until his mom got worried and told him if he doesnt stop, he will eventually turn into one. he only eats it every few weeks

when he was younger, kunimi cried because he had befriended a chicken on a trip to a farm and his mom took him to eat fried chicken after and he thought it was Chicky (his chicken friend :"))

kyotani used to stick out his tongue when it was raining so he could taste the raindrops. they taste better than bottled water

one time, during a seijoh sleepover, they dared oikawa to wear his sisters old uniform, skirt and all, and it backfired so everyone turned red and couldnt look at him in the face

their pregame ritual is touching each other's shoe tips

they tried doing yoga at yahaba's house before by watching yoga youtube videos but everyone ended up having to go to the chiropractor after (how did makki even turn into the human pretzel?)

the local gym gets so scared when they see the team coming through the doors bc these men are so LOUD like they HYPE EACH OTHER UP SO MUCH THEYRE SO ANNOYING AKSKSKDK

also never take them to an all you can eat sushi place. if you do, bring them earlier of the day like 30 mins after opening time so the cooks can cook enough for them without running out of ingredients (even then sometimes they still run out)

oikawa used to eat his mom's roses from her garden because he thought it would make his farts smell good like roses

takahiro is a surprisingly good artist like he draws really cool action fighting scenes in the corner of his papers and stuff

in my work: it's canon that iwa is half filo and his nanay used to dress him up in a barong all the time during halloween bc she wanted him to showcase his heritage

yahaba drinks a lot of milk because he hopes to one day grow strong and bulky like the 3rd years instead of being seen as a pretty boy

kindaichi's mom is a hairstylist and she always scolds him for using a lot of gel bc she's always the one who washes his hair

makki never learned how to do taxes and hes had the government knocking on his door a handful of times (BOKUTO AKKDJSKKS)

kyo has a dog: a chiweenie

there's someone on the team who wears those socks with individual pockets for toes

their pinterest is so different from what they look like for example, mattsun has a board of different flower decorations and arrangements

kunimi throws up during intense horror movies

watari's celeb crush is emma watson

the team alternates from different music genres like from ateez and bts to mxmtoon and beach bunny

they still dont know how to pronounce camila cabello's name

theyre all active in social media but only oikawa is on it 24/7 and in all platforms while the others have insta and snap

mattsun has twins as little siblings and he used to get them mixed up all the time that he used to draw a sharpie dot on the girl's forehead to determine she was his sister

watari hates sitting on the floor bc his butt bone hurts really easily so he can only sit on cushions for long periods of time

the team was supposed to have a party but everyone didnt know what to bring so they proved they shared the same braincell by bringing the same thing: a box of pizza

makki's an old soul and prefers to play records on a record player or watch old movies

kyo is surprisingly good at giving massages because he really pushed hard on those tense muscles

kindaichi knows how to crack necks so everyone goes to him a lot to do it (a friend of mine does this and can i say its terrifying yet so good?)

the only one who has a license is matsukawa and thats because granny needs to go to the doctor a lot and he hates her walking by herself and cabs are expensive

kyotani and yahaba are actually,,, lowkey close,,, not like best friends but theyre nice to each other and they got a stick and poke together (yahaba's was: :) while kyo's was: >:))

watari has a collection of mangas (some bl maybe 👀)

WARNING SAD: mattsun’s future job is a funeral person right? he ends up taking care of granny’s funeral free of charge and he had to take a week off because it was really painful for him

oikawa learned spanish SUPER fast to the point he forgets japanese sometimes but there are moments where he forgets both languages and hes just,,,, ???

makki’s unemployed yea but he rooms with mattsun in exchange of cooking because makki’s surprisingly good at cooking

iwa is practically the nutritionist of the team because he knows everything about proteins, carbs, iron, and needed vitamins so they all go to him to know what to eat and what they need

kunimi has lots and lots of shoes but usually only wears 2

kindaichi has a habit of pretending hes chewing gum even though he doesnt have gum, his mouth just chomps and moves with air akasldfjkf

there was a clown phenomenon in america but in their city, they had a mascots and seijoh 4 went around scaring kids :”(

oikawa never manspreads he gets too insecure to spread out like that akdjfkd

kyotani can easily sleep anywhere like he would be standing and just fall asleep or he sleeps with his eyes open

yahaba’s parents own a restaurant somewhere in the city and he works there sometimes

IM REALLY GOING TOO MUCH ABOUT THIS YALL AKSDJFKL

SORRY IM WRITING TOO MUCH I FEEL BAD THAT I HAVENT UPDATED BUT IM IN A CAR RIDE RN AND I WAS ABLE TO WRITE AGAIN AND MY EXAMS HAVE FINISHED THIS WEEK IMMA CRY

PLEASE, FEEL FREE TO REPLY WITH ANY OTHER HCS YOU GUYS KNOW OF SO I CAN PUT IT IN HERE AND CREDIT YOU WITH IT SO WE CAN HAVE LIKE A HCS BOOK FROM EVERYONE BUT THIS IS WHAT I STARTED WITH

oikawa screams a lot according to gigi but he’s actually a really quiet guy and not easy to scare

OKAY YOU GUYS DONT KILL ME I SWEAR IVE BEEN SO TERRIBLE AT WRITING BUT YOU KNOW WHO TURNED ONE TODAY? THIS PAGE!!! MY BABY IS ONE ALREADY 😭😭😭 ANYWAYS, HOPE THIS CAN MAKE YOU GUYS SMILE TODAY AND SCHOOL ENDS NEXT WEEK AND IM ALREADY AT 132 DRAFTS AMSJKSDKSK SO OH MY GOD THERES GOING TO BE SO MUCH COMING AND IM SO EXCITED TO GET THEM OUT 😩😩

159 notes · View notes

ambria · 3 years

Text

everytime // Sirius Black

Sweetener x Marauders

play ‘everytime’ by Ariana Grande <3

pairing: sirius black x reader

word count: 2.3k ✨

warnings: angst, fluff at the end, mentions of drinking, under-age drinking, partying, depression?, mentions of drugs and drug use, someone trying to take advantage on the drunk reader, crying? Let me know if I missed something.

This also might have a few time jumps

A/N: I wrote this in 1st person but I feel like I should make these in 3rd so that’s what I’ll start doing. But this is also my first time making a one-shot fic so cut me some slack if it’s trash. But I hope you enjoy!

I get tired of your no-shows

Taking in the warmth through my fingers I look at the door once more before glancing at the clock.

He’s late. Again

I take a deep breath to cool down my nerves and sigh. I sip the rest of my butterbeer before looking at the entrance once more and packing my stuff and walking out. I look around once more before giving up and walking back to the castle.

You get tired of my control

As I’m walking back I start to get more irritated by the step. This isn’t the first time he’s done this. Always too busy to hang out because of him with his friends or too busy because of pranks. The missed dates and the interrupted times. All for his friends. I’m clearly not a priority in his life and that has to change or I’m not going to be in it.

Walking through the castle I collect my thoughts on how I’m gonna approach this situation. But since I’m so pissed off, I’m gonna take an angry approach.

I walk up to the gryffindor common room and say the password before walking in.

As I stepped into the common room, lo and behold, the marauders spread on the couches talking loudly and laughing. Seeing that made my blood boil. As I walk over I catch the attention of the brunet,

“Y/N!!!!! Hey!!!” The Potter boy called out. I gave a weak smile. Which caught the attention of my boyfriend.

“Hey, babe.” He smiled at me. I internally roll my eyes and keep an emotionless face on. At this point all the attention from the boys is on me.

“Hey. Can we talk?” In the corner of my eye I can see Remus and James glance at each other and look worriedly at Sirius. Yeah. They know better.

“Uhh. Sure. About what?” This time I rolled my eyes. I ignore his question and grab his hand before dragging him up to his dorm.

We enter and I close the door before leaning on it. He goes and sits on the foot on his bed.

“What do you want to talk about? We were in the middle of planning.” Bouncing his knee, I can tell he’s getting impatient and just wants this to hurry up and be done with this. I get even more annoyed at this.

“What do you want to talk about? We were in the middle of planning.”- I mocked him- “This is exactly what I’m talking about! You’re always busy! Doing this and doing that!” I start to raise my voice. My face starts to heat up due to my anger. I try to calm down but it doesn’t seem to be working.

He opens his mouth to say something but I cut him off,

“Where were you today?! I was waiting for you! For our date that YOU literally planned!” His eyes widened with realization and looked at me with a guilty face. But I’m too pissed off to care.

My eyes start to water with tears of frustration but I’m nowhere near done,

“Everytime I want to hang out you’re always busy with your friends and pranks! You never have time for me anymore!” At this point tears are streaming down my face and Sirius doesn’t look that far behind.

“This is the third date you missed! Because you forgot! I’m done with being second best. Im probably not even that!” He has his head down, hands on his knees.

“I—I-I” he stutters out what I think is going to be some wack apology. But I’m done. I can’t do it anymore.

“No. I’m done.” As soon as I said those words his head shot up fast and looked at me with wide eyes.

“No-” he goes to protest but I cut him off again.

“No I can’t do this. Not anymore. This has gone on for too long. You need to fix your priorities. I hope you don’t treat another girl like this. I’m breaking up with you, Sirius.” I don’t wait for a reply and I simply walk out of the door and walk back down to the common room, wiping my tears.

They keep telling me to let go

As I make it to the common room I notice the boys are still there. They see me and go to talk but a loud sound cuts them off. Items getting thrown around, is what I guessed it to be.

We all freeze and guilt washes over me. It’s Sirius.

But I don’t really let go when I say so

I turn my head to the staircase with a sad expression before brushing it off.

I had to. I deserve better. I thought to myself.

I look over to the boys to see that they have worried but knowing expressions on their faces. I gave them weak smiles and walked away to my dorm.

I keep giving people blank stares

Drama travels fast around here at Hogwarts. So it wasn’t long until word got out that infamous Sirius Black was single again and back on the market.

My friends are starting to get worried about me because of my reaction to the breakup, or lack thereof. I know how to keep my emotions buried. I know it’s an unhealthy coping mechanism but I refuse to be sad over a boy who treated me like shit.

I’m so different when your not there

What they don’t know is that I cry myself to sleep. Everyday. I close my curtains around my bed and put a silencing spell around it and sob. For hours. It’s pretty sad.

But I keep my neutral face on for everyone else. From what I know Sirius isn’t doing much better. He’s just more open about his broken heart. Lily tells me he mopes around and doesn’t speak much anymore. Let alone prank anyone.

Everytime she tells me about him being sad it makes me want to run out the room and find him to cuddle with him and kiss him and apologize profusely for the break up.

But I remind myself that it’s not my fault and that I deserve better.

It’s like something out of Shakespeare

Because I’m really not here when you’re not there

I tried to fight our energy

It's been three months since the break up and I have developed some pretty bad habits.

I’ve secretly been drinking to numb the pain. I know it’s not healthy but I can’t seem to stop.

Once all my roommates are sleeping I drink by myself on my bed. It helped in the beginning but now I can’t stop.

I’ve perfected my fake smile so no one could tell the difference. Well one person did, but I was unaware.

I’m in a deep depression and I have no one to talk to. None of my friends know, I can’t tell them. They won’t understand.

Meanwhile,

“Pads, you can’t keep moping around. She’s moved on, you should too.”

“No, I can’t. I still love her.” Sirius said but due to him being face first on his pillow it came out muffled.

“Well then you’re going to have to work your way to get her back. Show her you’ve changed.” The werewolf suggested to his friend.

“Really?” He picks his head up to face his friends, red and puffy eyes with a hopeful expression.

They nod.

But everytime I think I’m free

As the weeks pass I start to receive notes and letters with little flowers attached to them. I know they are from Sirius but I can’t seem to open them and read. It’s too hard and I’m not ready yet.

You get high and call on the regular

Once I reach my empty dorm I run to my trunk and collect all the saved letters. I place them on my bed and chuck my shoes off before climbing on my bed while getting comfortable.

I sort the letter from how I received them. I slowly open the first one,

Dear y/n,

Looking at us now I regret a lot of things.

I don’t blame you for not seeing us together in the future.

I was horrible, but for you I am willing to change. No. I will change.

You deserve so much better and if you let me I could be that person.

But I have to fix myself in order for that to happen.

If you're willing I would love to have another chance.

forever yours,

Sirius

As I finish reading my eyes are cloudy with tears. I continue to read all of the letters.

And by the end of it I’m sobbing.

I get weak and fall like a teenager

I knew it was a bad idea to read those letters. Because after that I am ready to run back into his arms and express my love. But I can’t until I know that he’s changed.

I deserve better. I keep telling myself that.

Why, oh why does God keep bringing me back to you?

Everytime I see him now I try to avoid him. Everytime he’s in a room, I leave. Everytime class is over I run out before he gets the chance to talk to me.

Because I know if I take one look into his beautiful stormy gray eyes I will fall all over again. And that can’t happen.

I deserve better.

I get drunk, pretend that I’m over it

It’s Friday night and today is the big Gryffindor party. Being stressed with liquor and drugs is not a good combo but I haven’t been safe these past couple of months.

I’m in my dorm room getting ready. I decide on a natural glam look with a bold red lip and a black satin body con dress with some black heels.

As I’m walking down the stairs, I can hear the music blasting and the red led lights are turned on. I part from my friends and immediately head to the liquor table. As I’m walking I fail to notice the pair of eyes following my every move.

I take a plastic red cup and I fill it up with the hardest liquor I could find on the table. After downing the cup I refill it and make my way over to my friends who are currently in the corner smoking what the muggles call ‘weed’. It’s strong but it helps me relax. Who knew muggle were so helpful.

Self-destruct, show up like an idiot

About an hour into the party everyone was either high, drunk or both. Which I was. Again me with my unhealthy coping mechanisms.

I ended up dancing in the middle of the room with a huge group of people. I feel eyes on me but I’m too drunk to care at the moment.

As I’m dancing I feel someone come up behind me and grab my hips. I turn around to see a random 7th year boy. He begins to trail his hands on my body.

He leans down to whisper in my ear,

“How about we go to my down, sweetheart?” His hot breath makes a shiver run down my spine, and not in a good way.

I began to shake my head while saying no but he clearly didn’t get the message because he gripped my wrists and tried to pull me with him. But because I was too drunk I couldn’t defend myself properly.

As I continue to struggle I see a person step in front of me, glaring at the boy,

“I suggest you let her go. Now.” I heard a familiar voice, I couldn’t tell who from my drunken state. Once the person turned around a smile involuntarily appeared on my face,

“Siri! Hi!” I giggled as he guided me away from everyone.

“Hi. Let’s get you somewhere safe.” He picks me up bridal style and starts to carry me up to the boys dorms and to his room.

I yawned and cuddled up into his chest,

“I’m still mad at you.” I mumbled. He set me down on his bed and goes to his trunk to take out some clothes,

“I know.” He said, sadly. As he’s helping me I go on a mini rant,

“You know you treated me horrible. I just wanted my boyfriend but you never made time for me. You missed dates, you cancelled on me a lot. And whenever we had time together alone you had to leave early. I just wanted you to give me your love and attention. But I was never a priority. I miss you so much, Siri.” After he tucks me into his bed he kisses my forehead and responds,

“I miss you too, baby.” He goes to walk away but I grab his hand. Which makes him turn around and give me a questioning look,

“Please stay.” I pout. He smiles and climbs into the bed with me. I turn to look at him,

“Cuddles?” I ask him with puppy eyes.

“Cuddles.” I snuggle up next to him with my head on his chest and my legs bunched up with his. He puts his chin on top of my head and begins to play with my hair.

“You know, I still love you. And I’m willing to give you a second chance, Siri.” I can’t see him but I can tell he has a huge grin on his face.

“I love you too, pup. Go to sleep. We’ll talk in the morning.” I start to drift off but before I do fully I feel him kiss my forehead again and whisper ‘I love you’ one last time before the darkness engulfed me.

Why, oh why does God keep bringing me back to you?

****

Taglist: @blackpinkdolan

If you want to be added to my taglist for this series message me or comment under the post.

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wh6res · 3 years

Text

sedan | jaemin

—part 2

synopsis. it was only a matter of time until he snapped. he was right, you should've seen it coming.

warnings. noncon, swearing, yandere themes, there’s a knife lmao

note. yalls idk :( it keeps deleting paragraphs when i add a readmore wtf is this sorcery IM SO SORRY

[read part 1]

apparently, your captor had enough respect for your dignity not to take you in the backseat of his old sedan. saying something along the lines of how you had completely ruined the mood by how much you were crying underneath him. “it’s not even pretty crying!” jaemin had exclaimed, hauling you up to your feet and carrying you bridal style towards the house.

respect? pft. he has long passed the line of respecting your dignity—the moment he forced that drug into your system and shoved you inside his car, he was a goner.

you don’t bother thrashing against his arms, having thought better. with your wrists and knees duct-taped together, running seemed like a joke. instead, you stare longingly at the outside world over jaemin’s shoulder—it definitely isn’t the last time you’ll see it, but if you were here because of his fucked up possessiveness over you, then escaping will be a challenge.

three months of working alongside jaemin is enough for you to know how thorough he can be. he’s quite the perfectionist, and you remember admiring his keen attention to detail but now you only fear for the things he has in store for you to make sure you’ll never leave his side. it was due to this train of thought that you involuntarily start shaking against him. the automated lock in the front door beeps into place and now you were stuck here with him, once and for all.

before you are able to take a look around the house, scoping enemy territory, a hand comes up to cover your eyes. the moment your fingers wrap around his wrist to pry it away, he hisses, and you let go immediately.

“stay still or else,” you obliged, scared of what he can do now that he has you all to himself inside the house. “i know what you’re thinking. still so fucking predictable. you’d have to earn my trust until i let you roam around here.”

the loud clicks of your restraints locking together prove that he is a man of his word.

the basement he keeps you in is disgusting. the tiles beneath you are cold, a few leaking pipes in the corner, dust everywhere, and a tiny window across the room—you doubt your chains can reach that far. but what captured your eyes the most is the numerous pillows stuck onto the walls and ceiling. the colors of its casings are faded, none of them matching one another at all. it was as if everything was messily put together at the last minute and you almost feel a tiny bit of relief that maybe, jaemin isn’t as thorough as you thought he’d be.

“i soundproofed the walls and everything, isn’t that romantic?”

you don’t answer, too caught up thinking about how you’ll stay warm that you don’t notice the way his eyes trail over your shaking figure, knees tucked under your chin, pressing yourself firmly against the wall to appear smaller. to create as much distance from him as possible.

jaemin frowns in distaste, a low hum resounding in the back of his throat as he thought; no, this won’t do.

“are you cold?” he asks.

once again, he’s met with silence.

if there is one thing jaemin absolutely hates with a passion, it was being ignored. the feeling is so foreign to him. maybe it was because of how much he naturally expects to bear the spotlight, that when you refused to even slightly acknowledge him as anything, he was confused. fascinated but frustrated at the same time.

it is the same frustration he felt when you turned him down. the same frustration he felt when you fought against him. the same frustration he felt when you don’t stop crying underneath him. the same frustration he felt right at this very fucking moment.

“i don’t think ignoring me will do you good, sweetheart. i asked you a question, didn’t i? i’ll say it again, one last time,” the edge in his voice is unmistakable. “are you cold or not?”

at this point, jaemin feels stupid for even thinking about granting you the slightest bit of leniency by leaving you alone tonight. jaemin had been willing to put aside his desires and wants for you. but his patience can only stretch so far until it comes snapping back.

and boy, were you in for it.

he utters your name, low and threatening and you just knew what it meant. as the victim, it should’ve been in your best interest to keep your captor from losing his shit and hurting you… and yet, you remain silent. you don’t know what’s gotten into you. the words are right at the tip of your tongue but you don’t say anything. it was as if time had stopped and your brain had short-circuited, making you forget how to speak.

when he stood up from the stool and started stalking towards you, you knew it was too late.

“jaemin…” your voice shakes. “jaem—yes, yes—i feel—i feel cold—”

the sting on your right cheek is the only thing to register in your mind for a few good seconds until it all clicks into place. he just backhanded you.

“i never thought you’d be such a fucking bitch,” he hisses, pulling at your restraints. “you were so silent, i thought you went mute, baby. how can you treat me like that? it’s no way to treat your lover.”

his soft tone catches you off guard for a fraction of a second. it was the same way he spoke to you before… all of this. it was the same tone that had once lulled you into a sense of security when you were stuck in a new environment, scared, making mistakes left and right, but jaemin had proved he can be someone you can depend on.

and look at what that cost you.

jaemin’s eye twitched when he noticed the slightly dazed look on your face, eagerly slotting himself between your thighs before holding your legs down with his shins. his hands dart out, grabbing your jaw in one hand before placing the other snug around your neck. the man can feel the rush of his blood flowing through his veins, ears ringing as he admires how pretty you were underneath him—pretty and helpless.

with a sudden urge, he darts his head forward to take a long whiff of your hair, eyes rolling back in ecstasy. he barely even registers the tears wetting the hand holding your face. jaemin is too far gone in his head because finally, fucking finally, he has you right where he wants you and absolutely no one can steal you away from him anymore.

meanwhile, you try hard to push him off of you but the pressure he’s applying to your legs proves too much. the hand encased around your throat pulls away and your happiness was short-lived as jaemin reaches for something above your head. it glints against the sole fluorescent light in the basement—

you freeze at the sight of his pocket knife.

he laughs, sounding too sweet and lighthearted. “now, now. i won’t hurt you…”

you hold your breath when he drags the knife across your body. from your collarbones, down the valley of your breasts, and finally settling at the bottom of your shirt. “i won't hurt you if you don’t move around too much.”

the sound of fabric ripping against the sharp blade made you want to thrash as hard as you can but jaemin had purposely angled the knife so the tip dragged against the surface of your skin. bile rises up your throat when you notice the way he eyes every inch of your torso as its slowly revealed to him.

“see, i know you’re a good girl. i just have to force it out of you sometimes, huh?” he mocks, quickly hooking the knife under your bra so he needn’t struggle reaching for the hook in the back.

his reaction is immediate the moment he sees you bare before him. he doesn’t even grant you the chance of hiding when he’s managed to hold your wrists in one hand, the knife clattering loudly on the floor as he surged forward, lips latching onto one of your breasts as his free hand feels the other one up. you turn your head to the side, not wanting to see his ministrations. until one particularly hard nip makes you yelp, his teeth latching painfully against a nipple before glaring at you through his eyelashes.

“eyes on me.”

jaemin can’t have you turning away from him. it simply looks like another act of defiance, as if you were depriving him of the expressions of pleasure found in your face as he continues to lick and suckle at the skin of your breasts, purple and red blooming on your skin.

when jaemin retracts from you to pull his shirt over his head, you made the last feeble attempt of trying to escape him. you’re able to free one of your legs from underneath him and have successfully delivered a kick to the groin. jaemin folds in pain. you managed to flip onto your stomach, dragging your body away with just your arms. you’ve only managed a few inches, chains rattling aggressively, when you felt his nails dig into the back of your thighs.

“fuck,” he grunts. “you’re going to fucking pay for that, pretty thing.”

he turns you around with one hand, unfazed by the pitiful look of your tears and snot cascading down your face as he looms over you, his knife in one hand as he fists your hair.

you shook violently as you brace your hands against his bare chest. jaemin would’ve revelled at the feeling of you touching him if you hadn’t kicked him in the balls only seconds ago.

“jaemin, please… i don’t want any of this—”

“you’re so cute, begging like anything could get you out of this.”

you flinch, eyes shutting closing on instinct. you feel something sharp poking on your neck, and it only takes you a fraction of a minute to register that jaemin is now holding his knife against your throat. digging the blade enough for you to know it’s there but not hard enough to draw blood.

“look how much you’re shaking, baby,” he coos, the tightness in his pants becoming unbearable as he gives you a one over. “such a sheltered kid, aren’t you? no wonder you’re so fucking naive, always making mistakes. always making the wrong judgement. you’re used to depending on someone, right? well…”

jaemin slices the skin above your collarbone. you don’t scream, the fear of him slicing your throat all together lies heavy in the air.

“…it’s a good thing you met me, huh?”

fuck you.

“i’m here, baby. you can depend on me all you want,” the giddiness and the sudden spark in his eyes make you dread what he’ll do next—you hear the sounds of a belt unbuckling. “i’ll bathe you, i’ll feed you, dress you up, but…”

there are no tears left when you feel his fingers pulling your shorts down together with your underwear. no tears left when you feel the tip of his cock prodding at your entrance.

“…you’ll have to give me something in return. that’s what good girls do, right?”

you screamed.

#yandere nct #yandere jaemin #yandere kpop #tw noncon #tw dubcon #tw knife

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dirtyoatmeall · 3 years

Text

Good for you

A/N: Wow sorry I've been gone!! I suddenly got back into reading and suddenly found myself in the middle of multiple series! anywayz, I finally listened to Olivia Rodrigo's new album so here is a songfic for good for u. I ended up going in a completely different direction than I had in mind. It's also long as fuck. I proof scanned it, but it's like 18 pages, as always sorry for the incorrect grammar, I do what I want. Call me Maybe will be getting one soon as well :)

Pairing: ex!Kageyama x reader, foreshadowed Atsumu x reader

Genre: angst? hurt/comfort? Its sad for pretty much most of it.

Word Count: 10.3k (im so sorry)

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol and drinking, implied adult themes, all characters are 21+ !!, detailed breakup. 16+ only por favor

Well, good for you, I guess you moved on really easily. You found a new girl and it only took a couple weeks.

Your phone chimed, alerting you of a new text, you reached for it on the side table, pausing the movie you were watching. It was a message from Shoyo and an image: ‘I’m sorry, I figured it’d be better if I told you instead of finding out on Twitter.’ Your brow pinched, what could that mean? You unlocked your phone to open the text.

The pinch deepens as you zoom in on the picture, eyes beginning to prickle with tears. It was a photo- most likely taken by a fan or paparazzi- of Tobio, your boy-, ex-boyfriend. He was with a woman, she seemed slightly familiar, probably a model or something along those lines. Your face heated and shame burned in your chest, the embrace they were in looked so intimate; private, that it seemed wrong to look. You deleted the image and left Shoyo on read for now; you’d reply when you’re in a better headspace.

It had only been a couple of weeks and he had already moved on, meanwhile, you were just starting to not cry at the little reminders of him scattered about your apartment. He hadn’t even come to get his stuff. You sniffle and walk over to the wall to your left; the picture wall- and gently take one of the photos off, smiling faintly at the memory it brings to the surface.

Remember when you said that you wanted to give me the world?

The sun filtered through the blinds, casting a soft glow around the room. Groaning, you squint at the brightness before rolling over. Your eyes find blue ones, startling you slightly. He chuckles softly, voice deep and gravelly with sleep; sending heat through your body. “you’re so jumpy in the morning.” he whispered in the otherwise empty apartment.

You roll your eyes and let him pull you into his chest, listening to his heartbeat and his fingers traced lazy shapes into your hip. “Shut up, you know it takes me a day or two to adjust after you’ve been gone.”

You meant for the words to be light; not expecting the emotion you heard behind them. He sighs, arm winding tighter around your waist as he kisses the top of your head. You bring your head up to meet his gaze and shift in his arms, frown tugging on your lips. “’m sorry, I didn’t mean to ruin the mood.”

He sighs again, shaking his head softly. “You don’t have to apologize for anything, I should, for never being home, missing holidays and-“ You put a hand against his lips silencing him, brows drawn tightly together.

“You don’t have anything to apologize for either. I knew what I was getting into when we got together, it didn’t bother me in school and it doesn’t bother me now. I’d much rather you live out your dream than being stuck here with me all the time.” You feel his mouth open to object, but your hand stays firm. “I’m serious Tobio, I mean every word.” He nods against your hand and you release him. You flush slightly at the open emotion in his gaze. He pulls you into a kiss, murmuring against your lips. “I don’t know how I got so lucky with you, I promise I’m gonna give you the world.”

And good for you, I guess that you've been workin' on yourself. I guess that therapist I found for you, she really helped

A few days later you meet Shoyo for lunch, a new onigiri place where he apparently knows the owner. He sighs as he sets down his menu, your eyes snapping back your own, pretending like you’ve been mulling it over this whole time. “Alright, go ahead and ask.”

You look up from your menu, feigning innocence. “Hm? Sorry I wasn’t paying attention.” He rolls his eyes and raises an eyebrow. You hold his gaze for a few moments before your shoulders sag in defeat. Your eyes fall to the table as you pick at the corner of the laminated menu. He gives you a minute to collect your thoughts before he places his hand atop yours, a sad smile gracing his features.

“(Y/N), it’s normal to want to know how he’s doing.” You chew your lip and mumble, “Well he’s obviously doing good since he already moved on.”

He continues as if you hadn’t spoken. “He started going to that therapist you recommended a day or so after,” he pauses, trying to gauge where your mind is. You’re meeting his gaze, and he can see you got what he was implying so he continued. “He’s been going consistently; says it’s really helped him.” You nod, blocking out his next words; too busy thinking about how you’re going to find a new therapist.

Now you can be a better man for your brand new girl

As you eat, you think over his words. You swallow and take a deep breath, trying to instil confidence in yourself. “Are they… good together?” Your voice comes out softer than intended and you inwardly cringe. He smiles faintly and nods. “They are.” You nod in understanding and turn your focus back to your meal.

Well, good for you. You look happy and healthy, not me-If you ever cared to ask

You knew it was inevitable, your apartments aren’t that far apart, you just wished it wasn’t so soon.

You were grocery shopping for the week, trying to figure out how many oranges to get before settling on 4 with a sigh, you toss them into your cart, turning around to see blue eyes at the other end.

You inhale sharply, your gazes met and he was too close for you to run away, leaving only one option. You were suddenly glad you met Shoyo for breakfast this morning, you were dressed up a bit, but you weren’t so glad when you became queasy. He opened his mouth to say something, but stopped, letting it fall shut. You feel your face flush with heat and you duck your head, mumbling a soft “sorry!” and move to continue down the aisle, hoping he’d let you go.

Those hopes were crushed with the hand that gently captured your elbow, halting your escape as he turned you to face him. You were silent for a moment before he realized he was still gripping your elbow, dropping his hand to his side. You crossed your arms around your middle, trying to look- be smaller, small enough to get away. Though the rational side of you knew it wouldn’t happen, that you’ve known each other too long to simply stop. So you raised your gaze, uncurling your arms and bringing your shoulders back to at least look the part of an old friend caught by surprise, smiling as you spoke.

“Oh, Kageyama! I didn’t see you there, how are you?” He cringed ever so slightly at the use of his last name, filling you with a sick sense of pride that weighed uncomfortably in your chest. He opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted by a brunette coming up to him, not noticing you as she surveyed the list in her hand.

“Babe, did you find the oranges? Oh, remind me to pick up my birth control at the phar-“ Her eyes widened as she noticed you; cheeks flushing slightly in embarrassment. Unfazed, Kageyama snorted softly, wrapping an arm around her waist before turning back to you. “This is Yumi, babe, this is (Y-) uh, (L/N).” You smiled and waved, which she mirrored, going to speak but instead was interrupted by you, who had decided to spare all of you of the awkwardness of prolonging the conversation. “It’s nice meeting you Yumi, and it was nice seeing you Kageyama, but I gotta run.”

They nodded and waved in farewell as you continued down the aisle, letting out a deep breath before heading into the next aisle. You needed more alcohol.

Good for you. You're doin' great out there without me, baby. God, I wish that I could do that.

You saw them a few more times during your shopping trip. You had wanted to leave right away, but you had been putting off groceries for too long, and leaving your cabinets and fridge almost barren. Thankfully they were always far enough where if you accidentally made eye contact a smile in passing was warranted enough.

As you contemplated between mini pizzas or a large pizza, you heard a loud giggle from further down the aisle. Your head turned towards the noise instinctively and you saw them at the end, near the ice cream, which you hoped they moved soon because that was next on your list. They were laughing, her arms around his waist as she looked up at him, he had an arm around her, resting on her hip as he met her gaze and you felt your chest tighten and an emotion you definitely did not want to name and wanted to shove down, down far enough to forget it. They looked the part of smitten lovers, and you decided you didn’t need ice cream all that bad and grabbed the mini pizzas before heading to checkout, continuing to ignore the emotion swelling, weighing down your chest and moving up to your throat.

I've lost my mind, I've spent the night cryin' on the floor of my bathroom

You took a deep, shuddering breath that broke halfway into a gasping sob. The emotion was suffocating, burning in the back of your throat and pulsing against your skull as you hugged your knees to your chest, the cold press of the tub against your back doing nothing. You tried to take a breath again but your chest was too tight, it was constricting your lungs, pushing hot tears down your cheeks and pulsing harder as with the ringing in your ears.

You could faintly comprehend the door to the bathroom opening, but didn’t look up as someone wrapped their arms around you, pulling you to them; the feel of fabric twisting in your grasp somewhat grounding as they smoothed down your hair, their words muffled under the ringing. You couldn’t think about the tears and who knows what else dampened their shirt, couldn’t think of anything except the emotion weighing so heavy in your chest you were positive it was going to break your ribs, break through you and continue down, down, deep underground.

You have no clue how long you were there with them, not even sure how long before they arrived. They shifted their arms to pick you up, and you let them, not even moving your hands from their place on the shirt, you were sure they were glued there, the tears acting as an adhesive. Sobs still racked your frame as you were set down, tucked under the covers of your bed before the person laid next to you, resuming their soothing touches as the weight in your chest slowly lightened, gradually releasing its grip on your lungs as the ringing quieted, allowing you to hear the slew of soothing words softly coming from the person next to you.

But as the emotion lessened its grip on you, tiredness swiftly replaced it, the pounding at your temples only encouraging the darkness to weigh you down, until it settled over you like a blanket, your fingers laxing enough for them to fall back to your side. Your breathing slowed, the occasional hiccup breaking the silence as you slept.

But you’re so unaffected, I really don’t get it, but I guess good for you

Shoyo let out a deep breath as he gently shut the door to your bedroom behind him, shoulders slumping with exhaustion when he heard the latch click. He dragged a hand down his face, combing his fingers through his hair as he went to your kitchen to finish putting away your groceries, throwing away what was defrosted before collapsing on your couch, pulling out his phone, debating whether or not to text the person likely responsible for your tears. Turns out he didn’t even have to, they had already called him and left a message about an hour ago, a little after Shoyo first got to your apartment. He brought the phone up to his ear as he pressed play.

“Hey, I ran into (Y/N) at the store today, you know I thought you might be right; that our friendship ended with the breakup, but it was like nothing had changed! She even met Yumi though Yumi didn’t notice at first and started talking about her birth control,” a laugh, “I don’t know why you were so worried, she seems perfectly fine. I was thinking about having a little get together in a few weeks, Yumi really wants to meet everyone from Karauno, you both should come! Oh one sec, what? Okay! Sorry, I gotta go, Bye.”

Shoyo slid down the couch slightly, groaning as he pinched the bridge of his nose. Really? He was glad you stocked up on alcohol at the store because after hearing that, he needed a drink.

Well, good for you, I guess you're gettin' everything you want. You bought a new car and your career's really takin' off.

Two weeks later you sat on your couch, eyes focused on the match televised. You tell yourself you’re watching the tournament to see who Shoyo will end up going against; if you can give them any pointers, though a part of you knows it’s a lie.

At the end of the match, the Adlers, no, To- Kageyama, had scored the winning point, securing a spot in the semi-finals. You lifted the remote to change the channel, but you froze as the camera zoomed in on the edge of the court, where you watched Yumi jump into his arms, he threw his head back laughing as he spun her around before kissing her. You could hear the commentators discussing the game after making a cheeky comment but you tuned it out. You watched them walk off the court, snapping out of the trace as soon as the camera cut to the other team. You quickly turned it off. Taking a deep breath in your silent apartment.

You were going through your Instagram feed when you came across a post from Tobio. It was him and Yumi in front of a new car, kissing. You noticed it had multiple pictures, and swiped through, all of them of the couple. The last one was the most recent, earlier today, in fact, you recognized the jersey of the other team in the background. You part of the caption, deciding to scroll past before scrolling back up to read the long paragraph that was pretty much a love letter to Yumi. You bit your lip and liked it, cursing afterwards, you didn’t want him to know you still followed him. You debated unfollowing but decided against it, it’d only look weirder if you had liked a post and weren’t following him. You couldn’t get his expression out of your head, he looked so happy.

It's like we never even happened. Baby, what the fuck is up with that?

Over the next few days you received multiple texts from Kageyama, updates on his family; that they were asking about you, wanting you to visit, an invitation to a small gathering they were having next week, Tsukishima, Yamaguchi and Yachi were in town and he wanted to introduce Yumi to everyone. And several attempts to start a conversation.

You replied to all of them, thanking him for the update, politely declining the invitation; using work as an excuse, and you halfheartedly tried to keep up with the conversations until it got to be too much. It was like nothing happened, like he hadn’t suddenly broken up with you, after almost 7 years together. There were times you wanted to remind him, but decided against it. You didn’t want to be the bitter ex, you wanted to move on, like he had.

And good for you, it's like you never even met me

You think Shoyo had a talk with him.

After it all became too much, the media, the texts, the times he tried to call you, you told Shoyo. He was furious, ignoring your pleas to just leave it be as he left your apartment.

Later that night he came back, less angry and with takeout. When you had asked where he went he just smiled and told you not to worry about it. You watched movies the rest of the night. When you awoke the next morning there were no texts from Kageyama, and nothing on social media. Your nosiness got the best of you and you looked him up, only to furrow your brow as the results came up blank. You checked the other social media you had each other on and couldn’t find him anywhere. You didn’t dare text him, just in case, but it was obvious- he had blocked you, on everything.

There was an emotion curling in your chest, but you couldn’t quite name it. You didn’t know how to feel about it, so you stayed in bed for a few more hours before migrating to the couch. Shoyo didn’t come over that night, and you hated that you were slightly relieved.

Remember when you swore to God I was the only person who ever got you?

You sighed, still slightly out of breath and damp with sweat, snuggling into the body next to you regardless, smile stretching your lips. He tightened his arm around your waist, petting your hair as he shifted onto his side, bringing you closer and tangling your legs together. You wrapped your arms around his neck loosely, softly kissing his throat, right below his adam's apple before resting your face against his collarbone. He shuddered and drew you impossibly closer. “I know I don’t say it as often as I should, but I love you (Y/N), so much. I swear sometimes I feel like you’re the only person in the world who understands me. Ugh, that sounded so cliché.” You snorted as he slightly shook with laughter. “I love you too Tobio.” You brought your head up for a tender kiss before the two of you settled into a peaceful slumber.

Well, screw that, and screw you. You will never have to hurt the way you know that I do

You awoke the following morning with a hollow ache in your chest, your eyes burned but nothing came. You don’t know if it was good that the tears never came, but the hollowness settled heavily in you, it seemed to be all around you, weighing down the air equally. You were on autopilot the whole day, not fully there.

You blinked at the chime from your phone and raised your brows at the time, and your eyes widened at the name in your notifications. You quickly opened the text and looked at the image 2,3,5 times. It was a selfie, only the top part of Yumi’s face was visible, she must’ve been taking it, having to have it out enough to get Kageyama and all of his family in the frame, everyone smiling brightly. The typing bubble popped up for a few seconds before it disappeared and was replaced by a small message. You read it over and over before biting your lower lip. This is when the tears would normally come, when they’d be expected and yet they didn't. The burn was there, the lump in your throat but nothing else except the hollow pulsed in your chest. You didn’t think that was a good sign.

From Tobio:

We miss you! The kids keep asking when you’re going to come to play again. We love you, and you’re always welcome to visit. -Miwa~

Well, good for you. You look happy and healthy, not me if you ever cared to ask

You decided not to tell Shoyo about the picture, after all, it was his sister who sent it. He sent an apology the next day and you quickly dismissed it, asking him to tell her thanks and to tell everyone hello for you and that you hoped they had a great trip.

He unblocked you later that day. You assumed it was because of your text, he probably thought everything was fine now, that little bump in the road passed and things were back to normal again. And you tried, you tried so hard to go back to the person you were before. Fake it ‘till you make it was something you lived by, and you certainly were doing a great job faking it, but the ache in your chest told you that you hadn’t made it yet.

Good for you, You're doin' great out there without me, baby

You always kept up with the volleyball news and media, now for just Shoyo, but it was impossible to not see Adlers updates, and as MSBY’s rival you felt you needed to keep up. They were a force to be reckoned with, win after win; tournament after tournament they were at the top, MSBY one of the few to keep up. You sent him a congratulatory text after his last win, if he didn’t want to leave your friendship then you’ll try your hardest not to either, even if it hurts.

God, I wish that I could do that

Well, that lasted about 2 weeks. It’d been about 2 months since Kageyama broke up with you. You texted occasionally, most of them short conversations. They used to be longer, but you knew that to really get over him, you couldn’t be his best friend like before, you had to distance yourself. Shoyo wanted you to block him, even if just for a few more months, so you can move on quicker, but you disagreed. Your lives were so intertwined it wasn’t possible to not see him or hear about him at least once a week, usually in the form of sports journalism.

You laughed at Tsukishima’s joke, choking on the margarita you were in the middle of drinking, causing the others to laugh at you. Everyone was miraculously in town this week and demanded that you all hang out all week. Yachi stayed at Hinata's apartment since he had a roommate, and Tsukishima and Yamaguchi stayed at yours, though everyone decided to congregate at your apartment, the former two falling asleep on your couch and after the third night in a row, you convinced them to just stay. Hinata packed a bag and slept on your futon, Yachi slept in your bed with you, and the last two shared your guest bedroom.

While they all swore it was a mere coincidence everyone was in town, you had a strong theory that Hinata invited everyone down to stay with you, since in 3 days was what would’ve been your 7 year anniversary with Kageyama. They did their best to keep you distracted, going out to clubs, having movie marathons and game nights that lasted until dawn. You were filled with immense gratitude for that, and you made sure to let them know it. You were glad your little group was able to stick together, even if the shadow of the empty seat at the table grows with each passing day.

I've lost my mind, I've spent the night cryin' on the floor of my bathroom

You almost made it. Everyone stayed in today, keeping a careful eye on you all morning, until you got a call from your mother. Your parents lived in the countryside, they didn’t have great reception out there, even if they did they’d keep the single landline they have now. They called every so often, for holidays or updates on health and family members. The last time you talked to them was about 6 months ago. You head into your bedroom before you answer, a little worried about what might be going on, you knew your father’s health was declining, could something have happened? You took a deep breath and accepted the call, bringing your phone to your ear. “Hello? Mom?”

It takes a second before she replies, probably trying to get your father to stand next to her. “(Y/N) sweetie, sorry it’s been so long, it’s been busy down here and since your father can’t do a whole lot anymore, it’s been taking longer to keep the farm in shape.” You can hear your father grumble something in the background and you can imagine your mother rolling her eyes.

“Nevermind that! We were calling to congratulate you and Tobio on your anniversary, that’s today right? 7 years, I hope you know how lucky you are dear, these days relationships just aren’t lasting like they used to, but I’ve always known you two would stick through, I still do. Hopefully one of these days I’ll get a call about a ring? Or maybe some grandbabies?” She giggled on the other end, going on to talk about her and your father’s relationship, not paying attention to if you’ve replied or not, and you haven’t, you’re- you’re- you jolt out of whatever trance you were in to find yourself on your bathroom floor, back against the tub, your mother still chattering away in your ear, though you can’t hear her.

She’s right. Today is- would’ve, been 7 years. A flurry of emotions roars to life in your chest and you feel the familiar burning and grip start to take hold. You clear your throat, interrupting her story.

“Uh mom, me and Tobio aren’t together anymore. I’m sorry, I meant to call earlier, but there’s a lot going on. I actually have to go, I promise I’ll call later okay? I might be able to get away from work in a few weeks to visit. Love you.”

You ended the call, guilt joining the mix, you had completely forgotten to tell your mother, her words stirring the pot of emotions and memories in your gut as they rose into your chest, filling your lungs, spilling into your throat into your nasal cavity, behind your eyes and into your skull. You slackened your hold on your phone, and it tumbled onto the tile. You choked against the burning in your throat, pressing your palms into your eyes, trying- uselessly- to stop the slideshow of memories.

He had been your best friend, your longest crush, your first- well, everything. You truly thought you would be spending the rest of your life with him, travelling the world as he plays volleyball, eventually settling down and buying a house somewhere, anywhere. Marriage, a cat, maybe a dog, and kids. You never once thought the father of your future children would be anyone but Kageyama Tobio. Apparently, he thought differently. Against your will, the night he ended everything played back in your vision.

You heard the door close as you finished up dinner, a smile stretching wide on your face as you imagined his reaction. You spent the week learning how to make this dish, an old family recipe from his grandmother that he apparently adored and ate every time he visited home without fail. After years of watching her make it, you’d think you would have a good idea of how but you were naïve to think so. You finish plating the dishes and setting up the table, brows pinched in confusion, he hadn’t come to greet you yet, which he always does. You shrug it off, he might’ve had a tiring practice, hopefully the food makes up for it.

You pad down the hallway, thinking he jumped straight in the shower. You stop in the doorway of your shared bedroom; He was sitting on the edge of the bed, head in his hands as his elbows dig into his knees. Worry and confusion rose; what was wrong? Was practice that bad? You don’t try to mask your steps towards him, though he flinches all the same when you lay a hand on his shoulder, quickly withdrawing it. You sink to your knees in front of him, gingerly holding his wrists as you speak softly.

“Hey babe, what’s wrong? Did you have a bad practice? Why don’t you tell me about it over dinner, I got everything at the table.” He sighed deeply, sagging further, like the weight of the world weighed down on him. Your concern grew and you squeezed his wrists in a silent question. He took a deep breath and sat up, you let your hands fall away but he caught them, cradling them in his grasp, pity and guilt swirling in his glassy gaze as it met yours.

You sat up on your knees, why in the world would he look at you like that? “Tobio? What’s wrong, baby you have to tell me so I can help, you gotta let me in.” You were pleading at this point. He so rarely showed this much sadness, you were sick with worry, mind going to the worst-case scenario. He squeezes your hands, bringing them up to his lips. He keeps them there for a moment, his eyes shut, brow drawn tight.

He brings them back down to his lap and lets out another sigh, meeting your gaze again. You can see the conflict on his features bright as day. “(Y/N), I’ve been so lucky to have you in my life, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to pay back what you’ve given me. I’m truly, truly grateful and you've been one of my longest friends, one of my best friends. Which is why- why-“

He lets out a shuddering breath gaze dropping, tightening his grip around your hands. Your brow is pinched deeply, eyes searching his features for any sign of what could be going on. He takes a breath, trying to calm himself before continuing, and when he meets your gaze you no longer see the guilt, you see a wall you worked so hard to bring down. You open your mouth to speak, but he cuts you off. “You are one of the most important people in my life, which is why I have to do this. I can’t keep doing this, prolonging the inevitable only makes it more painful and the last thing I want to do is hurt you. But, (Y/N) I can't keep this up any longer, I thought- I thought it might pass, if I kept going along, pretending like everything is fine, when it’s not.” Your heart drops, no, it can’t be, what does he mean?.

“Everything is fine Tobio, what are you talking about? What are you saying, I-I don’t understand.” The emotion thickens your voice and his face falls as he sees the tears gather in your eyes. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I loved you so, so much. I promise, I loved you more than anything, so much it hurt.” The tears are escaping both your eyes. You want to get out of his grasp but his hands only tighten around yours, like a lifeline. You suppress a sob bubbling up to speak, the world tumbling softly from your quivering lips. “Did?”

A hand touching your shoulder tears you from the memory. You’re aware of the hot tears streaming down your face, of the tight sobs wracking your frame, ripping from your throat against your will. You feel hollow, the ache grows and pulses until it’s all you feel, grief rising to meet it. You blink the tears away, to look around the room, you hadn’t recognized it right away, still disoriented from the memory. You see your friends, concern and in some cases, anger, in their gaze as they hover. You were surprised to find Tsukishima was the one at your side, the one who had pulled you from the memory turned nightmare. Your lip wobbles and he pulls you into his arms, embracing you as you cry into his sweatshirt, much like you had to Hinata weeks ago.

You’re vaguely aware of hushed voices around you, the rumble of Tsukishima’s voice oddly soothes you. You can hear Shoyo behind you, you think you hear him say your mother’s name, was she calling again? The thought slips from your mind as quickly as it came. You sat in your bathroom for who knows how long, crying in Tsukishima’s arms, surrounded by your friends.

But you're so unaffected, I really don't get it but I guess good for you

Later that night, when everyone has finally passed out, you slip through your apartment door, pulling your hood up as you head towards the street. You have your phone, keys and pepper spray. You just wanted- no, needed to get out of there, the slight chill in the air rousing you. You take in the surroundings, letting your feet take you wherever they please.

You sigh as you take in the park in front of you. You used to come here a lot, whenever you needed to clear your head. It was a space for you to be truly alone to work out your emotions. Which is exactly what you needed now. You smile faintly as you reminisce, not paying attention as you head to the swings, only to stop in your tracks, still hidden in the shade as you watch on. What the fuck.

The creak of the swings is drowned out by laughter, two people sit on the swings, legs pumping to go higher and higher. Her hair whips in the wind and she closes her eyes, leaning back for a moment. You watch him slow down, eventually stopping and getting up to approach her flying form. Right when she is about to pass him, he moves, grabbing her and the swing, halting them mid-swing. She squeals, which quickly melts into laughter as she lets go of the chains, wrapping her legs around his torso and her arms around his neck. Her smile is a sun in the night, love radiating from the couple as they kiss. You look away and spot an open picnic basket, a bottle of wine poking through on a blanket rumpled from use.

You leave as silently as you came.

Maybe I'm too emotional but your apathy's like a wound in salt

The hollow ache starts to burn as you walk back to your apartment. You didn’t expect him to be as affected tonight as you were but you thought he’d- what did you think he’d feel? Mourning? Grief? Sadness? Why would he? He was the one who broke it off, who ‘fell out of love’ or at least that’s what he said when he broke your heart. And to bring her there?

Maybe I'm too emotional Or maybe you never cared at all

You shared that spot with him a year after you moved in together, he knew its significance to you, to your relationship. How long had he been bringing her there? What did he tell her about it? Did he use the words you said to him all those years ago? You wondered if he even remembered what today was. He said he had loved you, but was he truthful? He promised quite a few things during your relationship that were broken when he admitted it, when he confessed ‘what had been eating him up inside.’

Maybe I'm too emotional but your apathy's like a wound in salt

The hollow was slowly filling, bitter, anger, loss, and more flooded the space as you recalled his words that night.

“I can’t do this anymore.” You had never felt more dread than in that moment.

“I loved you so, so much.” You had wished the past tense was a mistake, but you knew it wasn’t.

“I don’t know when it happened, if it was slowly or quickly.” You could tell it was a lie.

“I-I just realized I loved you in a different way than you loved me.” A cute way of saying he no longer loved you.

“I thought that if I just stuck with it, that it might change, that it was just a slump.” Another way to say ‘leading you on because I was too afraid to tell you the truth.’

“I tried, I tried so hard to love you the way you wanted me to.” For how long? How many years did he lead you on, how long did he let you think everything was ok?

“You deserve more than I can offer.” You knew that was true, you did deserve more. You deserved a lot more than this, than an offer.

Maybe I'm too emotional Or maybe you never cared at all

You were crying by the time you got to your apartment building, but it was different. You didn’t feel the aching hollow as strongly as before. You felt anger, bitterness about what he said, you had a million things you wanted to say to him, to make him know what he did. But didn’t he already know? He was there, he saw what his words did, he saw the aftermath, at the very least he heard about it. And yet the night after he was pictured entering a popular high-end club. It was on your Twitter feed that morning, effectively pouring salt and lemon into the hole in your heart. You had thought it then, and you’re thinking it now.

Well, good for you. You look happy and healthy, not me If you ever cared to ask

The next morning, no one brought up last night, and you were thankful for it. You think they could sense the shift, from the aching despair to the brittle anger. So you all lounged on the couch, playing Mario Kart to help you channel it.

You were on the fourth stage of Grief according to Yamaguchi, who brought it up the following day over breakfast. He explained: Denial- which was during the breakup and right after, Depression- which came to fruition after you ran into them at the store, Bargaining- When you tried to go back to how it was before, trying to keep the friendship alive so you’d still have him around, Anger- which was now, when you realize that you wasted years of your life for someone who didn’t even love you and now they want to go back to friends, after they immediately get into a new relationship. The next step would be the final- Acceptance, when you would finally accept he was gone, when you could finally move on.

Good for you

After that night the change became more obvious. You weren’t hiding anymore, you would hold your head high and snap others off if they trod down the wrong path. You felt the hot anger slowly cool over time, as you continued to go out, to clubs, bars, parties Shoyo always invites you to but you always decline. You met his teammates, finally after too long.

He had dinner for you and the team at his apartment that he shares with one of the said teammates. You dressed up a little, enough for Shoyo to whistle when you showed him over facetime as you finished getting ready. You weren’t planning on going anywhere except your apartment after; there was just something about knowing you look good that does wonders to the confidence. You grin widely as he complains about not wanting to deal with his teammates crushing on you. You end the call when you get into your car, you were going to stop by the store to get something and then head over, despite his assurances no one else was bringing anything.

You purse your lips in thought as you surveyed the wine selection in front of you, bending slightly to read the label of one on a lower shelf. You didn’t realize you were taking up the aisle until someone cleared their throat behind you. You paid the little mind, murmuring an apology as you stepped to the side. You felt their presence next to you, and after a minute of them burning a hole through you with their gaze you turned towards them, lips pursed in annoyance rather than thought.

You're doin' great out there without me, baby, like a damn sociopath

The wide eyes of Kageyama Tobio meet yours as you study him for a moment before smiling. “Kageyama! Sorry, I didn’t realize I was taking up the whole aisle, you know me; always so indecisive.”

Your joke seems to snap him out of whatever train of thought he was in. He smiles and chuckles, turning to look at the wine in front of you. “What kind of an occasion is it?” He asks after a beat. “Oh Shoyo is introducing me to his teammates today, wine’s something people bring to dinners right?”

He smiles and nods before pointing out several bottles. “These would be appropriate, and Shoyo likes this brand.'' He plucks one from the shelf before presenting it to you. You smile and thank him, before parroting his question back to him. He turns back to the wine. “Uh, Yumi got a promotion and I’m surprising her with dinner with her coworkers.” You hum in thought before grabbing a wine off the shelf for him. “I think this would be a good one. It's white, so the stain won't be as bad and won’t stain her lips like a red would. It’s a dessert wine so even her younger colleagues should enjoy it. Oh, and tell her congrats for me.” He smiles and thanks you before you part.

You arrive right on time at Shoyo’s, the wine was well received and his teammates were great. They were everything he told you and more, you all got along great, especially you and Atsumu, he was Shoyos roommate and it was great to have another person to make fun of his horrible habits with, much to Shoyo’s dismay.

The dinner flies by, and eventually, you’re the last to leave. You wave to Atsumu before hugging Shoyo. “Thank’s Sho, for everything you’ve done for me these past 6 months. I love you.” He squeezes you tight, kissing the crown of your head before pulling away.“You don’t need to thank me (Y/N), I know you’d do the same. I love you too, drive safe.” You wave as you leave back to your apartment.

I've lost my mind, I've spent the night. Cryin' on the floor of my bathroom

The next 6 months fly by, and you spend more and more time with Shoyo and his team. Bokuto dubs you an honorary Jackal and you celebrate drinking until dawn, as a true Jackal would. You spend time with them individually, the gym with Bokuto, reality TV with Sakusa, movie nights with Shoyo, and all of the above with Atsumu, in addition to annoying his brother Osamu at his restaurant.

It hits you out of the blue. You had felt a little off all day, but you had chalked it up to the takeout you had last night. You glance at the calendar as you walk past, only to backtrack and look again, with wide eyes. Today marked a year since the breakup. It had taken you a long time to move on, but you were finally starting to feel yourself again, so why did your heart ache all of a sudden? Why did the burning rise in your throat, prickling the back of your eyes as you began to breathe faster, feeling the despair rise out of the depths to rip a sob from you lips? You try to stop, taking deep breaths, count five things in the room, but none of it works. It’s not as bad as the other times, but you feel shame crawling up to join, you were finally turning things around, how could you let it all go to waste?

You curl into yourself on the couch, blindly calling Shoyo to ask for his company, maybe he’d know, he helped you get this far, maybe he can make sure you don’t fall too far. You listen to the rings until you hear the click of an answered call, not even letting him speak before crying into the phone, asking him to be with you, help you understand. Half your words are unintelligible as you ramble on, not really listening to the other end until you think you hear him say he’s on his way, but he sounded odd, different. Had you interrupted him? Was he too busy? No, he would’ve told you and sent someone else, probably Yachi since she was the closest.

You quickly tire of trying to hold everything back, and let it wash over you, all the feelings from this past year rise up, poised to drown you, and you allow it, letting it crash down and wash over you. You let the sobs free themselves, somehow knowing it was the right thing. You give yourself to the despair, the anger, the loneliness.

You don’t hear the knocking at the door, or the sound of the door opening, too absorbed untangling the knot of emotions in your heart; until you feel the cushion next to you you sink with the weight of another person, and a hand gently rubs your back soothingly.

You lean into him, letting him pull you to him like many times before. He pulls you into his lap, curling an arm around your waist while the other hand cradles the back of your head, letting you sob into his shirt. You take a deep breath, letting his familiar scent calm you- wait.

You freeze and your stomach drops. It’s not Shoyo. They're bigger, enough to cradle you against their chest. They’re whispering soothing words into your hair, and you hear a familiar accent, leaning back quickly enough to send a wave of dizziness through you and you sway for a moment.

“Woah, what’s wrong?” Atsumu asks, moving his hands to your hip and back to steady you. Your wide eyes meet his and he tilts his head slightly in confusion. “(Y/N), hey sweetheart, you okay? Gave me quite the scare there earlier ya know?” You continue to stare at him until he waves a hand in front of your face, breaking whatever spell you were under.

You blink a few times, shaking your head slightly as the corner of his mouth quirked up. You look back at him, brows furrowed, cringing when you hear your voice, hoarse after however long of crying. “’Tsumu? What’re you doing here? Where’s Sho?” He raises an eyebrow at your question, lifting his hand to wipe a tear from your cheek.

“Whaddya mean? You called me cryin’ an’ askin’ me to come here to keep ya company. Speakin’ of, what in the world is wrong? What’s got you so sad sweetcheeks?” Your face heats at the nickname.

“Oh, ‘m sorry, I meant to call Sho, he knows; it’s- today is-” He embraces you as a fresh wave of tears springs from your eyes. You can hear the rumble of his chest as he speaks, breath fanning your ear. “It’s all ok, ya don’t haveta cry, I can call chibi if you want him instead of me, it's no prob-“ You shake your head, cutting him off.

“No, s’kay. Thanks for being here ‘Tsumu, sorry I pretty much threw myself into your lap when you sat down.” You rub an eye, feeling awfully close to a toddler. He chuckles and combs your hair back, tilting your chin up so you’re looking him in the eye. “No needta thank me doll, and I won’t object to a pretty thing like you throwing themselves into my lap, though I’d enjoy it more if you weren’t crying. Now, d’ya wanna tell me what made you cry a river in here. Or at least what I can do to help.”

You curl inward slightly, not sure how to explain your wants at this moment, the emotions tangling in your chest too raw to name. You use actions to express your needs as words continue to fail you. You shift in his lap, straddling him instead of the awkward side hug you were doing before. You break eye contact, looking anywhere but him, feeling awkward and exposed. He snorts softly and his hands run up your knees, palm flat against your thighs, up and over your hips to splay against your back, bringing you back to his chest. Your pals lay flat against his sides, sliding along his ribcage and then south, fisting the fabric against his lower back as you rested your cheek on his shoulder. You waited and waited but the tears didn’t come, you could feel the tear tracts cool on your cheeks, trying to put your feelings into words.

A shudder than through his body as he felt you sigh into his neck, arms wrapping tighter around you, pulling you closer, until you were flush against him. The minutes passed by as the two of you stayed wrapped around each other, you breathing the only sound in the apartment. You sighed again, pulling away from him slightly to lean back to look at him. He searched your face, taking in the emotions clouding your eyes, thumbs rubbing circles into your hips soothingly. You gave him a weary smile and took a deep breath, looking down at your hands as you spoke.

“I don’t know if Sho told you about this, but about 6 months before I met you guys I got out of a pretty serious relationship, I mean it was my first relationship and the breakup hit me really hard. The day of the dinner was one of the first times I had truly felt myself again.

“We got together in our first year of high school. We had been friends years before that. God, I had a crush on him for so long, I can’t remember anyone before that.” Your voice is whispy, reminiscing on a better time. “I wasn't a manager that first year, though I was around often enough that I helped where I could. I was at almost every practice, which is how I got acquainted with the other first years. He was still guarded and grumpy then, so I was friends with everyone first, and we all slowly warmed up to each other.

“When he asked me out at the end of the year, after saying goodbye to the third years, it just- it felt so right, like this is supposed to happen. I was a manager our last two years and by graduation the six of us were close. We managed to stay in touch and visit each other whenever possible. Sho had gone to travel, Kei to Sendai for school, Hitoka and Tadashi stayed for school before she went to Tokyo and he stayed in Miyagi. Tobio was picked up by the national team immediately after graduation, to play in Rio. I was accepted into a university in Osaka, and he moved in with me when he got back.” You ignored the way Atsumu’s hands tightened their grip when you said his name.

“It was perfect, we- we were doing fine, or at least I thought we were.” Your voice cracked and you took a shuddering breath before continuing. “He traveled between Tokyo and Osaka a lot and of course for games but it never bothered me, I knew what I was getting into. Eventually, Sho came back, and joined your team, moving into an apartment not far from ours. I was so happy.” You whispered the last sentence, afraid if you said it too loud it’d sound like a lie.

“I hadn’t noticed any changes, he didn’t seem withdrawn or unaffectionate, he was like he always was, until he wasn’t. He came home one night and said he didn’t love me like that anymore, that he couldn’t love me the way I loved him. He- he said he tried to, he said he tried for a long time, in case it was a slump but it wasn’t. And all-all I could think about was the way he said it, like he had been thinking about this for a long time, he looked so tired like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders as he told me the last who knows how long was a lie.

“He left and stayed at a teammate's house until he could get an apartment. He moved close by, I still don’t know why he didn’t move to Tokyo. Sho came and stayed with me for a few days, until I kicked him out so he could focus on the tournament that was coming up. He kept in touch with Tobio, and would update me when I asked.

“That was a year ago, and I know I should be over him, and I am, or I thought I was until I realized what today was and- and everything, all the emotions I had pushed down came back up, no longer letting me ignore them. All the grief and anger and insecurity kept rising and rising until I thought I was gonna drown. Which is when I called Sho, or at least I thought I did.” The corner of your mouth twitched into a small smile as you met his gaze.

But you're so unaffected, I really don't get it

“I- I think it would’ve been easier if he hurt too, if I saw that it affected him even half as much, because that would mean he had felt something, he had loved me at one point. And I don’t know, maybe he came to terms with it before he ended it, but seeing him with someone else, not even 3 weeks later just rubbed salt too deep into the wound that just seeing them happy together sent me into tears. When I ran into them days after I found out, when I saw with my own eyes how good he was, how happy he was without me; I don’t know how long I cried, but it was suffocating, it had such a tight grip on me I couldn’t breathe, I didn’t even realize Sho was there until he was hugging me.” You watched your tears fall onto your hands, leaving droplets on his pants. You took in a shuddering breath, suddenly meeting his gaze.

“I just- I don’t know what wrong with me, why can’t I let myself be happy?” Your voice cracked, and you brought a hand to your face, embarrassment simmering low in your gut. Atsumu gently pried your hand away from your face, replacing it with his own as he cupped your cheek. He wiped the tears that fell from your lashes with his thumb. He brought you forward to kiss the crown of your head before returning his gaze to you.

“Doll, look at me. There is nothing wrong with you, ya hear? Your heart was broken, it ain’t gonna fix itself in a day. You will be happy, I promise. Whenever we lose someone we love, a piece of us goes with them. He was sucha huge part of your life, I’d be more worried if you weren’t sad. I can’t say when, but one day you’ll notice it hurts less and less until you barely notice it. Until then you have me and everyone else to help you, so don’t hesitate to lean on us when you need to, got it?”

Your bottom lip wobbled and your eyes were glassy with tears yet again, though this time for a different reason. You threw your arms around his neck and crushed him into you as you cried his name. “I didn’t know you were such a softie! I bet no ones gonna believe me when I tell ‘em.” He wrapped his arms around you again, you were so close you could feel his laughter in his chest. “Yeah, and I didn’t know ya were such a cry baby.” You snorted and pulled away, “That’s on you, I am a well-known cry baby.”

You matched his grin, feeling lighter. You pulled yourself off his lap, but he didn’t let you get very far, pulling you into his side, your legs thrown over his thighs as you turned on the TV. You ended up falling asleep on your couch together, your neck cramped and you found out you drool, but it was worth it.

But I guess good for you

The next few months went by relatively quickly. There were a few hiccups, mostly on holidays, but you listened to what Atsumu had told you and you leaned on your friends during those times. Speaking of Atsumu, while you two were close before, after that night you felt even closer. You found yourself at the apartment he shared with Shoyo more and more. You came to every MSBY game you could, usually helping Osamu run his booth.

When you weren’t with him, Atsumu would often find you helping his brother run orders at the restaurant; under the guise of an apology for annoying him so often, but both twins saw how happy you were when you were working. Eventually, Osamu just gave you a position there, because he didn’t want to get caught exploiting free labor, not because he liked you or anything, you were just as annoying as his brother- or so he says.

The blonde hadn’t noticed just how much time the two of you spent together until you went to visit Yachi in Tokyo for a week, and had odd chunks of time with nothing to do. It was confusing, and frankly off-putting how different it was when you weren’t around. Everyone noticed of course, and teased him for it, more the team than Osamu, because he couldn’t deny he missed you too.

Despite your protests that it was just a 2-hour train ride from Tokyo, and maybe another 10-minute ride to the stop near your apartment, Atsumu insisted on picking you up from the station during your call earlier. “ ‘M not taking no for an answer doll, I’m picking ya up.” You rolled your eyes at his stubbornness and sighed. “Fine, but I’m venoming you for the gas, no ifs ands or buts about it.” You smiled at the sound of his groan from the other line, good thing you were just as stubborn.

Well, good for you, I guess you moved on really easily

You were idly scrolling through your Instagram feed, about 10 minutes away from Osaka when you saw a glimpse of a ring, you scrolled back up and read the caption. ‘I’m the luckiest man in the world’ followed by a picture of what must’ve been Yumi’s hand, and adorned on her left ring finger was a large, and no doubt expensive, engagement ring. 6 months ago it would’ve summoned tears, but now you smile faintly, commenting your congratulations before scrolling past. Atsumu was right, eventually, it started to hurt less and less and now it was barely there.

You stood up when the announcement of your arrival in Osaka rang overhead, tucking your phone away and grabbing your bags to exit the train car. You immediately spotted your chauffeur, thanks mostly to the gaggle of young girls surrounding him as he laughed and signed autographs. You walked slowly, trying to buy time until they left but (un?)fortunately he spotted you. A wide grin stretched his features and you couldn’t help but reciprocate, lifting your hand in a small wave. He turned back to the girls and said something before breaking through, jogging towards you as you met him halfway.

You had an amused look on your face from his theatrics and the wide gazes of the girls he left behind. “Hey.” He said when he stopped in front of you. You snorted, “Hey.” He pouted at your tease, which only made it more funny, before rolling his eyes and taking some of your bags, giving you a pointed look when you tried to object. You huffed and walked next to him towards the exit.

You startled slightly when his arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you by your hip into his side. You looked up at him but he kept his gaze ahead, though you could see the slight flush to his cheeks and the slight twitch of a grin. You reciprocated, hooking your thumb through the belt loop by his hip as you kept your gaze ahead, his stare bringing a slight heat to your face.

He laughed lightly and you two continued out to his car where he tried to make you sit in the back seat because “ it’s not professional for a chauffeur to let their passenger sit up front.” You laughed before letting your face fall into a mock-serious stare and said “no.” in the best deadpan tone you could conjure up before climbing in.

You raised an eyebrow as you looked at him when he didn’t start the car. His hands were on the steering wheel and he was looking ahead in thought. “Atsumu?” He looked at you, smiling softly, still not saying anything. “Uhh you okay? Do I really need to sit in the back for you to be able to drive because-“ He laughed, waving your concerns off. “No, no, I’ll allow it this once. Sorry for spacin’ out, I’m happy yer home.” You looked at him incredulously, “ I was 2 hours away ‘tsumu.” You see a faint flush creep up his neck and he clears his throat, turning back to the wheel and turning on the car. ‘I know, I just missed ya ‘s all.”

You were just able to make out his dejected mumble, quietly huffing in amusement as you glanced down briefly before turning to look forward, biting back the smile at his flinch when you grabbed his hand, bringing it to your lap as you intertwined your fingers. “I missed you too, ya big softie.” Smiling, he squeezes your palm before focusing on the road, and you feel something stir, a bud sprouting from the once hollow place in your chest. It hasn’t bloomed yet, but you have a feeling it will soon.

#my writing #haikyuu!!#haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x y/n #haikyu #miya atsumu #miya atsumu x y/n #miya atsumu x reader #miya atsumu x you #atsumu x reader #atsumu x y/n #atsumu x you #haikyuu atsumu

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theravencawsatmidnight · 3 years

Text

Rabbit iiiiiii

Ending.

Want a chapter two? Let me know!

Draco finds a Hufflepuff attempting to cheat. He torments her, keeps her under his wing becoming possessive , unsure of his feelings. After turning Reader into a Rabbit he realizes how much of an ass he was. But now hes in Azkaban for his crimes.

A/n. Okay. So i asked Multiple people. “What happens in Azkaban?” They all said “you sit in a cell.” And im sitting here like. “I cant write that.” So THIS is what i came up with. I hope its okay :/.

W! Mind games, self injury(scratching), fear of going insane, Draco gets kicked and punched around.

@khemz1312 @goofygobber @rosiehufflepuff @trashyvicks

“Cheers love”

Draco said once you vanished from his sights, he never thought the twins would help you come see him, or anyone for that matter. Of all people, he was not exactly the most loved at Hogwarts. The man looked both ways down the very long hallway not seeing anything except for darkness. At least no one would bother him while he was thinking.

He made his way back to his spot under the window to think about his actions; maybe he went a little overboard with how he handled catching you. But a teacher? That's not as fun. Draco looked down at his hands counting the cuts all over them, he had the most on his palms and around his fingers. He was very roughed up, as soon as he got here the dementors were not very kind to him. Draco blinked his eyes feeling sleepy and slightly cold. He rolled his eyes leaning back on the wall reminiscing the time he turned you into a rabbit.

You were so cute like that; so little, curious, fit right in his pocket. Dracos hands fell to his sides and his eyes started to close. You had gotten used to him when you were a rabbit…

So tired…

When he got out Draco wanted to master the spell to change humans back whenever so he could turn you into a rabbit again. If you let him of course, he laid down on his side, holding himself.

Fading….

His father.. What would he do about that? Obviously he could not take you home . Maybe a flat of his own would be better. And that shop? It made him smirk as his eyes started to close. Cute..

Footsteps could be heard and they were getting closer now. It woke Draco up from his slumber which he was not happy about. The one time he was actually getting some sleep in this place.

“Dinner already?’ he asked, in a condescending tone as he got up to rest his back against the wall. “Is it more than bread today?”

The cell opened and closed after the figure stepped in. Draco scrambled to his feet with wide surprised eyes,“..Father?”

“Not the best cell.. But it suits you.” the man said, dusting the dirt off his clothes.

“What are you doing here? Who let you in?”

“I'm here because I have unpleasant news for you.” he took off his gloves while he spoke.

“..news?” Draco stepped over to his father.

“That girl you turned into a rabbit is dead.”

“..she… shes ……….” Draco went as far as the chain would let him to his father. His ankle was straining against the cold tight cuff link. “H..ho-w…”

“Quiddich”

“What?.. But she doesn't fly! She doesn't have a broom!” the man grabbed his fathers coat shaking it, asking him multiple questions just for Lucious to throw him off and kick him away from him. Draco hit the cold brick wall on his side in the corner. He held his head trying to process this , he was hurting inside and out.

“They needed one more , and you were not there so I suggested...”

Draco glared over at his Father, who looked rather proud of himself. His hands went to his hair white knuckling them. “You…”

“She didn't last long, it was a waste.” Lucious stepped to his son grabbing his chin so he was looking at him. “And to think she would still be alive if you just left her alone”

“Its not my fault!” Draco shoved his father just for him to strike him down into the cell floor. “Get your hands off me boy, remember who your authority is. “

“Shes dead because of you!, shes.. !!! …………………..” Draco felt very cold all of a sudden, looking down he saw that his hand was fading as if it was getting sucked up by something.

“Wait.. Azkaban would never let you come into the cell…” Draco stumbled up, hitting the wall to steady himself. “They wouldn't.. Your not my father! Get out you bloody dementor!!!”

“Draco dont you know your own father?”

“Shut up! I know my father and thats not you!”

“Pity, enjoy your time here.” the figure of Lucious faded and Draco woke up in a very cold sweat. He was still laying down under the window, no one was with him in the cell and his body ached.

“Dementors.. “ slowly he got up moving to the corner to hug his knees. “Do your bloody worst, im Draco ffffffucking Malfoy.”

It won't be the last time the Dementors mess with Draco… they were determined to break him. Throughout the two years he was there you had not come to see him again except that one time the twins helped you. Draco told you now to bother the twins so you didn't. Fred and George did try to cheer you up though as much as they could. They even got a hold of Dracos old robes that they gave to you. It helped but you wanted the real thing. Him.The carrot cravings went away after a couple weeks which was nice. You did not need to carry a bag of the produce with you anymore.

Hufflepuff was still weary of you and Slytherin were still jerks. The Ravenclaws sympathized with you and you found comfort in them when you needed it. You wanted to visit him, see if he was okay. But all you could do was hope and stare out your window at the moon knowing he was looking at the same one ..

Two years later.

“You killed me”

“Shhhuut up….”

“Im dead, because of you.”

“...”

“Do you ever wonder? What could you have done differently? Acted in a more.. Reasonable way?”

“Your not .rrr.-re-al..”

“Not anymore, my time on this earth has ended. Because of you Draco”

Draco ran into the bars punching at them, blood was dripping from them now. The figure of you faded away right as he got to them to reappear in the cell next to him now. “Your not real..” he said again.

“Treated me like an animal, toyed with me..-” he swung at the dementor watching it fade away then reappear. “I was just a hufflepuff, an innocent girl.” Draco shook his head but the thoughts just got louder and louder.

“Dead”

“Gone”

“Killed”

“Stay here”

“...with me, let's be together” you held out a rotted hand to the shaking man. “Be like me”

Draco had been tormented by these dementors at least 3 times a week ever since his ‘father’ had come to see him. Day in and day out for at least 6 hours a day a dementor came to him as you to try to get Draco to crack.

The first time he almost fell for it, but he quickly realized it was not you. You were not a crying mess trying to touch him and you could not float….

But still seeing your figure hurt him, your body was made to look dead to cause even more damage to the man which it did. All he could do was endure and think about you, the real you. It was all he had to hold on to. He told himself when he spent his first night here that he would be okay, he would make it out fine.

But now hes crying on the floor at least twice a week with new bruises, cuts, and a giant headache. He fully knew how awful he was to you now, he had to apologize properly. That motivated him to fight, along with keeping you safe from his father. He would get out, he would be okay.

“...b-b-b-e like you?”

“Yes Draco, like me. Lets be together, lets get out of here.”

“Get .. out..”

“Yes , lets get-”

“No, you get out. Get out of my cell, get out of my head just GET OUT!, ill never go with you! Your not real and your NOT HER!” he stepped back, tripping over his feet and grabbing the cell bars to steady himself. His clothes by now were tattered and his dirty dark blond hair was in a pony tail. The cuts on his face turned to scars and his nails were bloody from him scratching at his itchy skin . Everytime he swung at the dementor it would fade out leaving traces of itself on the man making him freak out and scratch at his own skin till they turned purple.

The dementor faded through the bars down the hallway and Draco sunk down to his knees scratching at his arms trying to free himself of the lingering black smoke.

“Rabbit… “ Draco choked in a big breath glancing over at the small window to see the moon shining in on him. “Ill get out.. Ill be okay. We will be okay……………………….”

A few days later a man had come to Dracos cell. He unlocked the old door letting it swing open. The man stepped to the side gesturing to the hallway and Draco looked up from his hand to see Snape looking in at him.

“Hurry up, its filthy in here.”

“How is she….”

“Why don't you see for yourself? Do i look like a owl?”

“More like an over dramatic snake.” Draco slowly got up limping to his old professor who helped steady him.

“Im glad your okay, Malfoy.”

Draco rolled his shoulders and cracked his very purple bloody knuckles. “Of course i am”

Meanwhile, those two years you had graduated and opened up your own shop with the help of Fred and George. They pulled some strings and found an empty building you could sell potions in. it was a small building but you liked it.

The Wet Nose it was called. With little bunny decorations all over the inside and on the sign, the sign was your favorite. It had a little bunny looking over the sign with its ears down. You tried to make it apparent you were here so Draco could find you.. All you could do was wait now..

Draco had left Azkaban with Snape , showered, eaten , and dressed in real clothes. He was in clean black pants with a matching suit top with awhite shirt underneath and black shoes. His face was still heavily scared and his knuckles were starting to slowly heal. The scratches on his arms would not heal though. They would stay that way for a really long time. He worried if you would still want him like this. He also kept his hair long , just past his neck he liked it. Draco was not completely free of the dementors, he could still hear them in his head from time to time. Whispering things for him to come back and what not. He always had to shake his head and they would go away for the time being.

Snape had dropped him off at Diagon Alley as he requested. Before he left he got out of the car to give Draco one final word.

“Malfoy”

“What? Which way am i going?”

The man rolled his eyes and pulled Draco in for a one arm hug, even though draco loathed this. The poor man fought and cursed, slipping free of this unwanted affection.

“The bloody hell was that?”

“Go down this way, on the left.”

“Fantastic but what was-” he slapped him on the head.

“Oww!!! What gives?”

“Thats, for barging into my classroom.” and with that he left.

“Barging into my classroom” mocked the man fixing his hair.

Draco wasted no time getting to your shop. He found it easily and just stared at the sign. He was scared. Terrified, would you still want him… you said you would wait for him.. But.. the way he looks. He shook his head, making the dementors stop. “No. she will, she waited all this time. She will.”

Ring ring!! The bell on the door went off once Draco opened the door. The first thing that got his attention was the many smells coming from all over the room. All the windows were open with plants sitting in them . He had to make his way to the back where the register was, passing all types of potions a variety of colors. When he finally went to it he saw a little brown rabbit sitting on the counter wiggling its nose. The rabbit tilted its head at Draco and the man did the same.

“Biscuit? Is someone here? And you didn't ring them up you silly animal” you joked coming from the back room up to the counter.

You looked up from the rabbit to see Draco standing there, his smile slumped and he had his mouth half open. He was in awe. It was really you. The real you. Quickly he fixed himself and his smile went all the way up his face, the man stepped closer with a happy, relieved tone.

“Hey, Rabbit”

#draco 😤#draco x hufflepuff reader #draco malfoy x reader #draco x reader #.RabbiyFic

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erismerald · 4 years

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Ｉｗｉｌｌｐｒｏｔｅｃｔｙｏｕ (Credence Barebone x reader)

Part 2

Hey angels!!! So im back again, this time I'll dedicate this chapter to my baby boy Credence Barebone, I swear he really deserves a lot of love :3

_________________________________________

ｗａｒｎｉｎｇｓ: Mentions of psychological and physical abuse, Blood, Semi-Mature, Cute

The boat was tearing the waves every second, towards New York. Your parents died about a month ago and now your nanny was taking you to a family that decided to adopt you, the family consisted of 4 members, Mary Lou (your new mother) and 3 brothers that you thought were your age, but you had no more information about them, the nanny preferred not to reveal more information.

Your eyes were filled with tears again, the longing for your mother's arms calming you down, and the fear you felt for living with complete strangers made your head too heavy, and because of that the nights have been a nightmare, you were already used to wake up screaming, calling your parents. Your thoughts left your skin burning and without noticing tears flowing down your cheeks as you looked at the horizon where you saw huge buildings increasing in size as the ship approached land, while you closed your eyes to try to imagine your mother's caring smile again, you felt a hand resting lightly on your shoulder, you turned around scared but you saw your Nanny smiling a little worried for you.

"Are you nervous, honey?" she asks you, pulling you closer, wrapping you in her arms and stroking your hair in an attempt to calm you down.

"A little..." you paused and pulled your body away from hers slowly and lifting your face so that you could look at her "I'm still overwhelmed by their death... it's been very hard, I don't know if I'll fit into this new family" you looked down and stared at your feet. Fear invaded your thoughts again but you were interrupted when your body was hugged with force. Your nanny put her hand on your face and faced you with a gentle smile.

"You don't need to be afraid, they will treat you well, and if you need something..." she stops and removes a small serpent shaped medal "just hold on to it and the fear won't bring you down again" she says and gives you the small medal.

"Whose was it?" Your eyes were analyzing the little object while you waited for an answer.

" Your mother, when she was studying at Hogwarts, we met there, and that was a gift given by your grandmother when she was chosen for the Slytherin house. She was proud, and she always wore that medal, it gave her courage and motivation...so I think you'll need it more than I do" she answered by approaching the edge of the boat looking at the sea, I followed her body and continued looking at my mother's medal.

You felt a smile on your lips and grabbed the little snake gently, through that little object you felt that your mother was still there, and you hoped that one day you would become as good a witch as she was.

When the car stopped in front of a house that looked like a church, your heart was beating constantly, your stomach was full of butterflies and your head was invaded by all kinds of thoughts, in a few seconds the door was opened and a hand was extended in front of you.

You grabbed the hand to support yourself and got out of the car looking at the pile of children coming out of the house, my instinct was to look at the nanny, and her reaction made your nervousness calm down a little.

You took a deep breath and walked towards the house followed by your faithful nanny, when you entered you saw a middle aged woman walking towards you and you felt a very strange energy coming from her, her smile seemed forced but even so she represented her joy in seeing you.

"Welcome dear! We were waiting for you" she says hugging your body and squeezing hard, almost stealing your air. Her gaze examined my body as if I had never seen a human being before, until it melted away when your nanny called her attention to talk. Meanwhile, you decided to observe the space around you, and in almost every corner it was possible to see anti-witch propaganda, my gaze despaired when I saw the prison where I was welcomed, how could I be accepted if they were against my kind?

My gaze analyzed corner by corner until my attention was stolen because of a powerful magical energy, I looked everywhere and felt my gaze heal with his.

He looked older than I was, and his body, even though it was muscled, looked frail and frightened, his gaze was black but he managed to steal all of my breath and made my cheeks burn.

He looked away from me quickly, looked nervous and scared of something, until I felt another pair of eyes analysing me, it was Mary Lou with her disapproving look at you when she saw that boy, after all who was he?

The nanny came up to you and gave me one last hug, and promised to visit you soon, at that moment your last memory of her was to see her body move away from you and disappear inside that car.

"So my child, it's time to introduce you to the rest of the family, what do you think? "Her voice echoed inside that little room and her hand picked up yours pulling you to the top floor.

As you walked upstairs the energy you had just felt began to grow stronger, and as you reached the floor you went into what was supposed to be the living room, your heart stopped beating again and your breathing became heavier when you saw him again.

Mary Lou sat down on the sofa waiting for you to follow her, and without delay sat down next to her facing your three new brothers.

" Well as I told you, from now on you'll have a new sister, this is Y/n, I hope you treat her well okay?" Mary lou looked at you then and smiled "This is Modesty, Chasity and Credence" she smiled again and got up and headed downstairs, followed by Credence, but first she stopped and looked back and headed to him

"Credence help her with her bags and take her to your room" she spoke harshly, it seemed their relationship was different, she was cold with him, maybe with time you can find out what was going on. But what she said was still in your head, your room? You'd have to share a room with a boy? You followed Credence until you reached the attic, it was a small room, but it was very cozy, and tidy, he had put your bags on the foot of your new bed and you just followed his body movements with your gaze, in a short time Credence felt himself being watched and looked at you timidly, and your gaze swerved quickly.

"I-i hope you feel comfortable here", he said, staring at the floor, his voice was hoarse but shy, he approached the door and stopped right in front of you.

"D-dinner is almost ready, in a while Modesty will come and call you" he said and left the room.

«TIME SKIP»

A few hours went by and you were still nervous, not because you were in that family, even though the idea of calling Mary Lou a mother was completely unthinkable, but because you were going to sleep in the same room as Credence you couldn't deny how wrong it was for you to find Credence attractive, but now he was your brother you couldn't think of that, could you?

You were lying in bed watching your mother's necklace, it was really beautiful, it was green and full of emeralds and silver, but something called your attention, a leather noise hitting something, and sometimes you heard some moans of pain.

You got out of bed and even barefoot you went out of your room and walked towards the stairway, and the vision you had broke your heart into a thousand pieces. In front of you was Credence crying and with some blood on his body and hands and in front of him was Mary lou with a leather belt in her hand, her expression was of anger, your eyes turned again to Credence who at the same time looked at you scared and ashamed. Mary Lou followed his gaze to you and her expression froze, she approached you and would try to speak but realized that your gaze was in credence.

"I was just teaching your brother that he shouldn't be home late," she said with a little irony, her voice repulsed you, you couldn't believe that from now on you'd be living with a monster.

"By beating him?What kind of teaching is that?" Your voice echoed through the house, your anger was eminent.

"He MUST LEARN" she said in anger as she turned to hit him again, but your anger increased the adrenaline in your body and you ran in front of him trying to protect him.

The sound of the leather hitting your skin echoed again through the house, your eyes closed tightly in an attempt to ease the pain and contain the tears, Mary lou raised her belt once more and hit you again on your back and this time you felt the hot liquid dripping down your back Mary lou looked at you and still you killed your position in front of credence. She grumbled something and went downstairs until she left the church, closing the door tightly.

Finally you fell to your knees with your lips trembling, and with a great deal of anger, your gaze rose and stared at the gaze of credence that was frightened and worried about you, you stood up and took her hand, guiding him to the room, you sat him on the bed and looked at him and smiled softly.

"Where is the first aid kit?" You asked in a quiet, low voice, you wanted to take care of him, he's helpless, he needed you.

"In that wardrobe" he pointed with his hand shaking, you took his hand carefully and his reaction was to remove it immediately, you looked at him and smiled, standing up and walking to the wardrobe and taking the little box that had it.

You went back there again and calmly looked at him again:

"Credence my love, can I take care of your wounds?" you asked quietly and he just nodded "for that I'll need you to remove your shirt please" this time your voice was shaking, it was the first time you'd even see a boy without a shirt, he hesitated but nodded, and started to unbutton his shirt while you burned with shame and tried to look the other way.

When he finally believed he had removed the tissue from his body you examined his body for injuries, his arms were full of bruises and his back a bit bloody, his gaze was glued to yours, his face was flushed, and you could see that his breathing was speeding up.

His body and the very attractive even with the scars, it took you some time to get all the wounds on her back treated, and now you were addressing her hands. The silence was comfortable, he felt confident with you what was new to him, he watched every move you made and blushed every time your eyes went in. He was worried about you, and felt a strong connection when you put yourself in front of him to protect him, he could see the pain on your face, he felt guilty.

You noticed his expression, which changed from calm to serious, and it left you worried

"Did I hurt you? I'm sorry I'm not very good with injuries" you said apologizing for any pain you gave him

"No...I'm just worried about you" his answer made your heart stop a bit "she hurt you...you need care too" he said softly and a bit ashamed.

"Oh sure, let me just finish putting the bandage on your hand, okay?" you said equally embarrassed. When you finished you let go of his hand carefully and let him put something on, you looked at him and with a nervous and shy look you turned on your back and knelt in front of him.

Credence followed your movements with his gaze and felt his heart shooting, you removed your nightgown showing your back to him, his breathing accelerated when he saw your naked skin exposed to him, and even more when he saw the dried blood on your skin. His chest was invaded by the feeling of sadness, he approached you and put his hand on your back, which made your body stretch, the feeling of his touch on your skin, it was too pleasant for you, he was gentle, he didn't want to hurt you, so he tried to be as careful as possible with you., his hands were delicate but robust and soon the feeling of a cold liquid goin' down your back, made you move away a little bit.

"Did I do something wrong?" he asked immediately, you looked ahead and saw the rain hitting the window of the room, and a few seconds later you looked towards him covering your chest, you felt his gaze descending and a little later staring at the floor, he was embarrassed to see a girl's body for the first time.

"No, don't worry dear, it was just the feeling of cold" you said and you turned to the front feeling your cheeks cheeks cheering, he just let out an "oh" and went on with what he was doin

Credence stopped for a moment...he knew what pain was since he was little, and seeing the mark on your back made his eyes fill with tears, he didn't know what he felt for you the moment he saw you, how he could trust so much a stranger, but seeing your act of courage in protecting him made his heart open to you.

You were not understanding what was happening, and suddenly your thought was invaded when the arms of credence wrapped around your body holding you tight.

He hides his face in your neck and you begin to feel his tears running down your neck, you couldn't move, he grabbed your body with affection, and even though you were half naked in front of him, he didn't care.

Your heart was a thousand, you just wanted to feel his arms wrapping your delicate body:

"I'm sorry..." he says with a trembling voice, his response moved your heart, you turned to him slowly holding the fabric of your nightgown over your breasts, you look at him and he stared at the floor, you delicately put your hand on his face, he came closer trying to feel more warmth coming from you, even with his gaze on the floor.

"Why?" your voice was like a whisper, your thumb stroked his cheek, waiting for an answer from him, and finally his gaze was stuck to yours, his eyes were red from crying, his reaction was unexpected, his face approached yours and little by little you could feel his breath near your mouth, and finally his lips touch yours.

It was a simple and innocent kiss, without maliciousness, his body stuck to yours and you felt your hands letting go of the clothes that covered your breasts, your arms embraced his body and his hands wrapped your back.

A few seconds later you felt him walking away without air, his gaze was still red, but when he looked down and saw your body sitting on his lap and saw your skin uncovered, he closed his eyes tightly, when you noticed your body you immediately left his lap and put on your pajamas again.

"You don't have to apologize to me Believe me, I promise you I will protect you from that monster, and you don't have to be afraid or apologize to me... I will take care of you" you said looking at him with a shy smile

"I want to protect you too, I won't let her touch you again, I'm sorry Y/n for what happened" he looked at you and you saw the most honest smile of your life, he was really beautiful and sweet, your will to protect him was immense... is it too soon to admit that you had fallen in love with him?

He put his gaze on you, his thought was invaded by emotions, he couldn't help noticing how delicate you were and how attractive your body was, you noticed his gaze and he was fixed on your body, and your cheeks turned red.

You said, "I think we'd better go to sleep" and you were going to lie down on your bed when Credence holds your hand, looks back and sees his eyes glued to your hand.

"Can I sleep with you?" he asked shyly.

"Of course...come on" you held his hand and pulled him up to my bed and let him settle down and then I lay down beside him, his head rested on my chest, and his arms wrapped your body.

The sound of rain made the room even more cozy and little by little you felt your eyes closing...the warmth of credence made you feel protected, and the love and affection you showed Credence made his heart open to you.

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Would you like part two? I hope you enjoyed this story :3 <333

#credence barebone #credence barebone smut #credence barebone x reader #credence fantastic beasts #credence x reader #credence barebone x plus zise reader #ezra miller imagine #ezra miller #Ezra miller x reader #Ezra miller x plus size reader #fantastic beasts and where to find them #fantastic beats the crimes of grindelwald #harry potter books #harry potter imagines #kevin khatchadourian #kevin khatchadourian x reader #we need to talk about kevin #flash

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ridiasfangirlings · 3 years

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okay... im not a big fan of mikorei but, what Would it be like for mikorei taking care of crying and distressed fushimi (I just love your works too and this came to my mind)

I kinda imagine Mikoto just passing him off to Munakata like 'this is your problem, right' XD The question is what would make Fushimi crying and distressed. Maybe like Everybody Lives AU and post-ROK something happens to Yata which puts Fushimi in a bad place, like the two of them are going after a Strain together and Yata ends up getting pretty badly hurt protecting Fushimi. Say Homra and Scepter 4 were on a joint mission dealing with some rogue Strains, Yata and Fushimi separate from the rest of the group to try and infiltrate on their own. They end up getting unexpectedly jumped and are holding their own for a while when one of the Strains manages to get the jump of Fushimi and aims a gun at him. Fushimi turns, knife in his hands ready to defend, but he's just not fast enough and he's about to get hit point blank when he hears Yata yelling his name. Fushimi suddenly finds himself thrown to the side, when he turns to look there's Yata who's just taken the blow meant for Fushimi. Yata gives Fushimi a weak smile and then falls down into a pool of his own blood, leaving Fushimi there staring in shock.

Meanwhile their respective clans have taken care of the rest of the Strains and Munakata and Mikoto are headed together to where Yata and Fushimi were last seen. They stop dead upon turning the corner, there's Fushimi all cut up and injured, on his knees by Yata's unconscious body with a bunch of unconscious Strains all around them. Munakata quickly calls for an ambulance for Yata and there's like a flurry of activity as Yata is taken to the hospital and Munakata has some of his men come and take care of arresting the Strains. Once Munakata's finished giving orders Mikoto taps him on the shoulder and points to Fushimi, still crouched there on the ground looking at the stain left behind by Yata's blood and just looking totally shattered.

Munakata immediately goes over to him, putting a hand on Fushimi's shoulder and saying his name quietly. Fushimi doesn't answer and Mikoto crouches down on his other side, saying Fushimi's name a bit more forcefully and making Fushimi look up. Fushimi gives this little lost 'Mikoto-san...?' and Mikoto sighs, running a hand through his hair as he says he isn't really good at this. Munakata's right there though, telling Fushimi that he's done well and he needs to go get checked out as well. Fushimi looks up at him and then back down at the blood stain, Munakata assures him that as soon as they're certain Fushimi himself is fine they'll take him to Yata. Fushimi's just totally shell-shocked though and maybe Mikoto's the first one to move, just grabbing Fushimi and picking him up bodily. Munakata notes that if Suoh could please not manhandle his clansman too much and Mikoto just snorts and asks where Munakata wants Mikoto to take Fushimi. Munakata smiles and runs a quick hand through Fushimi's hair, Fushimi looking torn between grief and indignation, saying that the vans would be sufficient. Once they get Fushimi back to the vans imagine Mikoto gets to keep Fushimi sitting in place so Munakata can look him over, the two of them just getting to fuss over him a little together and eventually Fushimi falls into an exhausted sleep leaning on Mikoto's shoulder while Munakata bandages some of his cuts.

#k project #Talking K #ooh I like this #crying Fushimi yes let's do this #and both of his Kings taking care of him in their own way #Mikoto being a bit rougher and more straightforward about it #while Munakata's all gentle and doting

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futurewriter2000 · 4 years

Text

Close Friends - pt. 6

A/N: I got inspired by my dreams for this part and I know it’s a mess but hey, you’re gonna love this mess and I get you back on your toes because now all you can expect is the unexpected , which you don’t know. Hehe. Wait till Remus comes in and the hogsmeade guy. You’re gonna love this.

"You're stealing." you said, grabbing the handmade knitted bracelet from his hands.

He turned around, not letting go of it and turning around with a grin. Both of you stared at each other with a mirrored, smug expression.

"I thought you were evolving, Froggie." you pulled the bracelet to you and he only fell forward, pulling it back to him. He spread his smile into a cheeky grin and narrowed his eyes.

"I'll give it back."

"What pleasure do you get from being a perfectly bred, pure-blood little thief?" you scrunched your nose and pylled the bracelet off him and locked it into your palm.

"Look Twizzlers." he opened his arms and shrugged. "She accidentally lost her grandma's handmade precious bracelet and I am the hero who found it. Once I give it to her, be all humble, she'll love me." he put his palm in front of you, requiring it back.

You leaned back and crossed your arms, narrowing your eyes and waiting for further explenation.

He rolled his eyes, took your arm and pulled you around the corner. He pressed you against the wall and locked you with his palms against the wall, his eyes staring intensly at you.

"James?" you asked, staring at him with wide eyes and feeling extremely confused by his sudden reaction.

He seemed to notice the discomfort he put you in, so he only chuckled and licked his lips. "Dont flatter yourself, Twizzie. I don't fancy you but you know who does? Padfoot does, or as you might know him Sirius Black."

"James..."

"No. Don't James me, (y/n). It's December and Christmas is coming. He has bought you an expensive bracelet, he's always around you, he's hugging you every chance he gets, he looks at you 24/7 and can't look away... And you know what? You know it. You know it and you keep moving away. You keep pushing him away because you do not feel the same for him so stop giving him hope like he has a chance with you because he clearly doesn't. " he was now extremely close, his forehead on yours and his eyes continously gazing into yours. "So who's the lil prick, you've been seeing? - The cologne guy? - Is it the guy from the Hogsmeade- the buzzcut with the apron-"

You cut him off with putting your hands under his jaw and pulled him into a kiss. When your lips crashed together and he couldn't realoze what was happening, all he could do was stare at the girl in front of him until she pulled away, staring back at him with petrified look on her face.

You kept looking at him, waiting for a reaction. His glasses were a bit crooked but you could see quite clearly in his hazel eyes that he had not expected this once in a million. He blinked and that point you knew the wheels in his head started spinning.

But there was only one wheel in his head spinning and that was the taste of your hiney chapstick and your plush lips that left him craving, more or so it let his hormones go wild. He couldn't think straight and before he could realize it, you started appologisin and he started to panic, grabbing you by tge wrist and pulling you back. His hands mirrored what yours did before, placing them under your jaw and crashing his lips into yours. His full body pressed you against the wall and as you felt his tongue slip into your mouth, wet and warm, it traced your teeth and your tongue.

It was your first kiss ever and it felt like heaven and hell colided together into this perfect mass of exhilaration. It was your first kiss and you thought you wouldn't know the first thing about kissing but your body seemed to know how to react because the next thing you knew, your hands were gliding up his chest and grabbing his shirt. Your fingers cramped and you crumbled the fabric into your palms as he continued to lean on you, kissing you so faultlessly.

"James?" both of you heard all of a sudden, coming from the corner.

James pulled away immediately and as breathless as you were, feeling his breath inside of you, filling your lungs- your fluttering heart, you could still see the horror in his hazel eyes.

You turned your head to see who it was and it was no other than his and yours best friend.

And then it hit you. Everything. Everythi g James said, everything Sirius did for you because he was in love with you and you knew it. You knew it for months and you kept avoiding it- and now he was here, looking at the two of you as both of you betrayed him.

His eyes were hollow, broken and filling themselves into an ocean.

"Pads, mate I swear it's not what it looks like-" James started to approach him but Sirius started to back away.

"Shit." you put your hands over your face and rubbed them down, not being able to think clearly.

"You knew." he said to James, shaking his head at him. "You knew and you- you and her-" his voice was shivering and cracking from the lump forming in his throat.

"It just happened right now- I swear mate- (y/n) say it's true, please help!" James turned to you, pleading for him to say him of this betrayal.

You looked up at his eyes that seemed to be just as broken as Sirius'. "You said nothing was happening between the two of you?" he kept looking at James, his heart unable to function properly in his chest.

"I kissed him, Sirius." you turned to the boy that kept distancing himself, shooting his head to you. "Today. Only today I kissed him for the first time and I didn't think before I did it-"

"You're in love with him?" he asked directly, interrupting you and staring.

"No- she can't. We're friends, me and Twiz-"

"I'M NOT ASKING YOU JAMES!" Sirius shouted at him and continued ti stare at you who kept quiet since his questions. "You are, aren't you?" he said and James shot his head to you, his eyebrows furrowing.

"I'm sorry, Sirius-"

"Give it back." he said and your head shot up, noticing he glared down at your wrist. "I want it back and I want it back now- GIVE IT BACK!" he started shouting as you took a hold of it.

"Sirius..." you said, holding up your wrist and pressing it to yourself. "You- I love- I'm sorry!" you keep trying to figure out what to say but nothing reasonable didn't come out.

Sirius didn't listen. He didn't want to listen.he was furious and petty. All he could feel was emptiness and hate for everything and everyone. So he rushed to your side and ripped it off your wrist, leaving a red mark around it.

You felt your heart break, just as his when he left you alone to stand there.

Everything seemed to happen so fast and so unclear. You felt confused, the boy next to you felt confused as well unable to know what had just happened.

But he could see you leaning yourself against thewall until you fell to the floor, holding onto your empty wrist and crying.

He wanted to leave he wanted to chase after his best friend, make it all your fault but he couldn't. He wanted to but something wouldn't let him just leave you. It almlst felt immoral if he did.

So instead of being the usual selfish self, he turned to your aid and picked you up. "Come here- let me see." he said, taking your hand to see the bruise.

He was furious. He was confused and he did want to shout and yell at yoy for being so reckless but there was a voice in the back of his head saying 'You kissed her back. You let it happen.' and he couldn't deny himself that.

"Is it bad-"

"I'm so sorry, James!" you sobbed, knowing how disgusting you must have looked right now with yoyr fat tears wetting yoyr cheeks and clotges, your runny nkse doing just the same. "Im so sorry! James, I'm so sorry-"

He pulled you into his embrace and pressed your head to his chest, shushing you quietly. He didn't know what to say. You kept doing and saying things he is not prepared for and that is making him act completely out of his character.

He pulled away, cupping your cheeks and smiling. "What are you sorry for, Twizzies?" he wiped the tears with his thumbs and kissing your forehead. "Kissing me?" he asked, looking at you softly and putting your hair away from your forehead. "I loved the kissing."

You looked up at him, feeling so desperately in love with him as you did back in second year that you yourself were speechless. "You did?" you asked and he nodded, making you smile.

"I just didn't expect it, that's all." he shrugged, sitting next to you and leaning his head on the wall.

"I thought you knew?" you looked at him and he did the same.

"Knew what?"

"That I'm in love with you. I thought it was obvious."

James didn't believe the words that were coming out of your mouth. He couldn't. He leaned his heas back on the wall and looked up at the ceiling, smiling. "I used to say you were so dense to not see Sirius' feelings towards you meanwhile I was so dense to nkt see yours." he turned his head to you, smiling but not really knowing why. "I thought you liked him back. The two of you were always so close."

"I wanted to make you jealous but you just didn't care." you shrugged, wiping the runny nose into your sleeve.

"I cared." he said before he could think,surprising himself as well. "At first I was like... You and Sirius? - And I thought you'd be just another of his exes but you never did and I-" he stopped himself, looking away and feeling extremely guilty to say what he wanted to say. "I denied you and me."

"What?"

"I knew there was something- chemistry and all but you were for Sirius. He loves you so much more than I do. I couldn't do this to him." he hung his head between his knees and let out a scoff. "And I still did it." he ahook it and leaned it back on the wall.

You observed his movements, feeling confident enough to ask him any question. "Did you ever think of me?"

He turned his head to you and stayed silent. "At first... When you and Sirius started hangong out, I wanted to ask you out again and I thought about you and me for a long time before I realized that it's wrong. But you were always there, with us, and it was hard moving on but I did and I said I want Lily. " he continued to speak but still felt like he was lying to himself.

"Do you still want her?" you asked. "And be honest- I can deal with you being in love with her. Just tell me the truth."

"Honestly?" he asked, turning his eyes back to you. "Honestly, I think you and me would be a great couple. Honestly, I always found you so attractive, fun and Merlin-such an amazing personality. Honestly, I would die to get a second date with you but... If I have to choose between you and Sirius, I'd-"

"-choose Sirius." you finished for him as he nodded.

"I can't feel these things for you. I can't. I have to feel them for someone else-"

"Lily."

"Yes, her. We can't (y/n)." he stood up as you watched him. "I can't do this to Sirius."

"And I can't be with Sirius when I am clearly in love with you." you stood up as well,standing behind him as he wanted to walk away.

"Why? Why can't you be with him?!" he turned around.

"Because I don't love him!" you shouted back. "I love him... But not the way he wants me to."

"He's my brother and (y/n)... He won't choose you and neither will I." he said before turning you his back and walking away.

Walking... And not turning back.

#sirius x reader #sirius black #sirius black imagine #sirius #sirius black x reader #james potter imagine #james #james potter x reader #james potter

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lemonietrinket · 4 years

Text

Love ||| Wayv x Reader

Summary: Everyone needs to be taken care of sometimes, no matter how strong they are. And so when you come home from an awful day in the outside world, you are blessed to have several people come and pick you up again, setting you back on your feet. Though, not everything is as a clear cut as you perhaps once thought.

Genre: Angst, but then lots of Fluff to make up for it!! and Humour too bc i think im funny

Warning(s): Detailed description of big crying, no mention of reasons why, just left as a very bad day; single sentence description of a mild bruise; a bit of arguing but it’s mild and there as so to highlight something

Word Count: 20,314 jesus christ

Theme Song: The Flower (feat. Maximilian Hecker) - Leo; Heart Flutter - W24; Only Love Can Hurt Like This - Paloma Faith

AN: original was a request from @idont-knowapil. I hope yall enjoy the rewrite. It’s pretty different in some places, but now there’s actually a lot of foundations for what is to come. Fem!Reader

~~~

It had taken all of your strength to not cry on the way home on the bus. There were too many people around for you to let the tears fall, but you’d bitten your lip so hard it bled and had held your breath until you were heaving, for it to all prove to be little use.

You tried your best, turning your head into the glass and staring into the darkness outside, praying that no one turned to look back at you or your reflection.

As soon as you got off at your stop, unable to utter a ‘thank you’ to the driver which made you feel even worse (if that were even possible) your defences began to break down.

Tears streamed down your face in the frozen evening air, merging with the rain and slipping between your trembling lips, the salt tingling on the tip of your tongue. Your nose ran viciously because of the wind, which also mussed up your hair causing you even more frustration as you tried to hold it out of your face, only for it to cover eyes uncomfortably again.

Your voice seeped into your breath as you tried to remain silent, strained whines at the effort it took to not openly weep as you needed to, whilst you prayed endlessly that no one would pass you by on the street and see the mess you were in.

Fumbling with your keys, just inches from being inside and away from the world, almost sent you over the edge. The key had got caught in one of the keyrings and with your shivering fingers and blurry vision, it seemed the world was kicking you while you were down.

A cry rose in your throat, and you forced it down as best you could, until finally you crashed into the house, bags toppled by the oven across the room. You were home at last. Slamming the backdoor behind you with a strength you didn’t realise you had left, you took merely a single step inside before you tripped over an abandoned pair of shoes and fell to the floor with a thud and a sob so hard no noise came from your body.

Today was not your day.

Your chest constricted upon itself, ribs very nearly bruising your lungs and heart, until you finally caught some air and howled.

You were ashamed of how you must have looked, sprawled on the kitchen floor, weeping hysterically, no doubt with a muddied coat and a bruised knee and hands pressed into wet footprints upon the linoleum floor.

If you’d been told to write the worst day you could have, today took that itinerary and then dragged it through hell.

You didn’t have the energy to stand, even if the puddles from outside that your shoes had dragged inside were being soaked up by your socks, unrolled at your heels and stained from their pristine white. Lethargically, you began to lift yourself out of the doorway as best you could, and to your feet. Your success was tainted however as you accidentally knocked your elbow against the counter ledge, and fresh tears immediately sprung to your eyes. It was the final straw for you, as you leant over the countertop and wept. Your fingers gripped the wood roughly, your forehead coming to rest against the cupboard as ‘what if’s swirled around your head. What if you’d been more polite to her. What if you’d done your printing the day before. What if you’d taken your lunch break elsewhere.

You knew rationally that nothing was your fault, but the rational part of your brain was far surpassed by raw emotion of emptiness that the uncaring world had showed you that day.

Your ears just about caught the footsteps outside before the door opened. When it did, you flicked your head towards the man out of reflex, your muscles tensed and breath shallowed.

“Y/N?”

The door closed, and the man came to a stop a few feet from you. The light flickered on suddenly—you hadn’t noticed his hand reach to the corner and turn on the switch—and the two of you suddenly reached a realisation as quickly as you were bathed in light.

It was Kun, a sight that you unfortunately greeted with creased features and tear-stricken face.

He responded to yours with a sharp inhale. His voice was hushed and filled with concern however, as he shrugged off his bag and immediately made the rest of the way to you, “Y/N…”

The man’s palms hovered beside you, unsure of what the situation was and what to do about it.

You opened your mouth to speak, but a broken cry was the only sound you could make.

“Y/N, are you ok?” he exclaimed, lightly brushing the hair from your face to try and understand what was wrong. “What’s wrong love? P-please, I don’t…”

At the first touch of his fingertips against your damp cheeks, you shook your head, instead slumping into his chest. You clung to him, fear gone as you cried openly into his jumper, speckled with rain. Kun was very nearly speechless, his hands eventually settling upon your back. Though of course you were still in your coat and the weather had left it sodden.

“Oh, love, oh…” he trailed off, unable to find the words. Seeing you like this hurt him beyond explanation, and he had no idea how he could even convey what he needed to do. Slipping off his shoes as quickly as he could and discarding them by the door, he reached his arms between you. “Come on, love, let’s get you out of this coat. You’ll catch a cold.”

A pang of hurt struck your heart briefly as he somewhat unceremoniously pushed you off him, but before you could begin to wallow again he’d slipped the coat off your shoulders and hooked it by the door, speaking once again, “You can get your shoes, right?”

You nodded sullenly, reaching down to undo your laces, meanwhile Kun rested his hand upon your back to hold you steady. His touch was surprisingly warm for someone who had only just come inside from the cold, however the chill of the room was creeping into your bones as your shirt provided you little warmth in the barely-heated house.

One shoe was off without a problem, however as you lifted your leg to take off the other, a twinge of pain ricocheted through your knee. You had clearly fallen harder than you had first imagined.

“Love? Did you hurt yourself?” he enquired, as his mind finally connected the dots as to what had happened, roughly.

“I…” you began, swallowing thickly, before you realised you didn’t exactly have enough energy to finish what you had started.

“It’s alright, I’ve got it.” And without hesitation, Kun crouched down to remove the shoe for you.

You felt pathetic to say the least. Like a child who had thrown a tantrum but had a parent who spoiled her nonetheless. You’d only hurt your knee, too. How could you possibly need someone else to remove your own shoe?

Truth be told, Kun felt like he wasn’t doing anywhere near enough, and had leapt at the chance to help you in absolutely any way possible.

Besides, before you could really do anything about it he’d placed your shoes neatly on the rack and returned to your side. “Alright, you’re good to walk?”

You nodded after a moment of hesitation, making his concern worsen. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah.” Your voice was shaky, but possessed enough certainty to convince him at least.

“Ok, that’s good. Where does it hurt?”

“Just… my knee…”

“Cut? Bruise?” His eyes dropped down instinctively to check, to only find a few muddy splotches upon your trousers.

You sighed, trying to work up the effort to explain. “I o-only tripped… hit it on the… the floor—stupid shoes.”

He was mildly startled by the sudden venom in your voice, glancing back to try and see whose shoes it had been. A wave of panic rushed to his chest as he spotted his overturned shoes in the middle of the doorway.

“Love… I’m so sorry, they’re mine. They must have fallen, I’m sorry—”

Your heart crashed to the pit of your stomach as you heard his words, and suddenly you felt terrible for even speaking.

“I-I’m sorry, I’m ok, it’s ok, I’m not mad, it—it…” Your teeth sank into your lip as you desperately tried to quell the overwhelming urge to cry again.

“Hey, it’s alright! I…” Kun’s eyes flew wide open as he attempted to ease the situation. He quickly changed tact. “Love, why don’t you go get changed? You’ll get cold otherwise. I’ll get an ice pack for your knee, and everything will be alright… yeah?”

You swallowed, mouthing a ‘thank you’ that you had intended to give a voice to, but it did not come. Deciding he had the right idea as you shivered, you edged your way out of the kitchen and up the stairs to your room, clutching to the banister as you went.

Stumbling into your bedroom, you set yourself down on your bed with a sigh, disgruntledly throwing some the clothes you’d discarded on the covers that morning out of the way onto the floor beside the end of your bed.

You haphazardly removed your clothes, your elbow crying out in pain now too as you stretched a bit too far, leading you to whimper. Even after changing into a warmer set of pyjamas, you remained cold.

As you began to shift your legs to attempt to remove your dirty socks, Kun knocked on the door.

You really wanted to reply with a ‘come in’, but all that really came out was an awkward hum.

He got the message however, slipping his body through a tiny crack in the door as if he didn’t want to disturb the room. He’d put himself into a more comfortable hoodie to keep himself warm before he’d come to you, a pack of cold peas in his hand.

“Honestly, you’d think we’d have specific ice packs in this household but, no,” he chuckled sheepishly, “all we have is cold peas. For some reason. Who here even likes peas?”

Had you been bright as you normally were you would have pressed the charge, accusing him of being the pea lover, since he was the dad of the house, obviously. You lamented the fact that you weren’t able to really muster even the melancholic humour it at the very least required.

In the period of time you’d been zoned out, the man was by your side, eyes searching your face. “Are you sure you’re doing fine?” He handed you the peas as you nodded slowly, accepting them with an empty face.

While you grimaced, feeling the ice cut deep into your bones, Kun found himself unable to watch, turning his attention elsewhere. He couldn’t help but note that whenever the slightest bit of pain touched you, whether it was physical or emotional, he couldn’t stand it. It was as if his entire chest contorted into a cage, the bones of his ribs becoming iron bars and just… crushing.

He found himself scooping up your dishevelled clothes from the floor and folding them neatly, before stacking them on your desk chair. Except the dirty ones, he’d looped those over his arm.

“Hey, I’ll just go put these in the wash real quick, ok?” His eyes carefully moved to look over to you again. He found your own gazing at the trousers upon his arm, glistening.

Before he could mention any comfort, they’d slipped to the pitiful state of your socks, as you choked an apology. It seemed so irrational to you to get so upset about socks, but they had been so clean and you’d just messed them up and you couldn’t help but blame yourself.

Kun however wasn’t letting you descend again.

He came to your side, shushing you gently. His fingers reached your head, stroking your hair with a gentle care you’d never felt from him before. “Love, sweetheart, it’s ok! It’s ok, it’s not your fault.”

He cursed himself in his head. If it was anyone’s fault in this scenario, it was his. He didn’t want to upset you further by mentioning that though, and so managed to keep it to himself.

“Let's just get you out of these, so they can be washed and all clean again, yeah?” He gave you a reassuring squeeze on your shoulder. “Do you need any help?”

You really didn’t want to accept that you did. To try and prove that, you slipped your left sock off with an issue, to which Kun took off your hands swiftly and added to his looped pile. However, even with the added angles from your bed, the makeshift ice pack prevented you from really removing the second one without pain.

Kun wordlessly took to his knees so he could help.

His kindness was tugging at your heart, smashing it to pieces in your vulnerable state, only to pull it all back together again. You didn’t feel worthy of his care, but on the other hand all you wanted was him to stay and never leave you.

In seconds the sock was gone and your foot cool. You expected him to stand again, but he remained on the carpet.

You peered down at him. “K-Kun?”

He was looking at the peas. “Love, can I see your knee?” He glanced upwards, soft eyes meeting your own for a brief moment before slipping away. “I just want to make sure it’s not too bad.”

Lifting the ice pack away from your knee cautiously, you helped him ease the cloth of your pyjamas up over your knee.

He hissed at the sight of the bruise you found there, as if the pain were his own. “Oh, love that looks painful.”

“D-does it?” The sight of the pinkish circle only startled you in the sense that it didn’t look that bad.

“It must hurt a lot,” he reiterated, “be careful around it. Don’t want you getting hurt more.”

“Oh… ok…”

The rough pads of his fingers left your skin, as you shifted the cloth back over your leg, all while goosebumps began to speckle across your arms.

Kun noticed immediately, eyes darting around the room as he got to his feet. Eventually he settled on the blanket balled up somewhat at the foot of your bed. Unravelling it, he brandished it around you like a cape, before wrapping you up in it.

“There.” He seemed pretty proud of his work, a smile finally adorning his handsome features. “Feel a little more comfortable?”

You pulled your eyes up to meet his gaze, and attempted to give a smile. It didn’t work. You settled on another nod.

“Well, that’s a success.” He laughed softly. You always liked the sound of his happiness, he always sounded so warm. “I’m going to head back downstairs, you want to come or stay up here?”

“I’ll…” you took a deep breath, “I’ll come.”

“Yeah? Great!” Your answer made his face light up even further, eyes actually turning into beautiful crescents. His sudden excitement reflected in his actions too, as he outstretched his hand to you, to help you up.

You took it as quickly as you could manage for how tired you still were, and the thought of how nice it felt to be holding his hand crossed your mind without a single hindrance. In fact it worried you, for reasons you were too exhausted to try and determine. And so you decided to drop it, fast.

It was surely nothing after all.

After leading you downstairs in a comfortable silence, you were eventually on the centre of the sofa, all the remotes beside you, with Kun by the entrance to the kitchen.

“I’ll make you some food? Ramyun will be good right?” he hesitated, feeling the corners of his lips twitch at the sight of you, encompassed by the blanket like a burrito. It wasn’t fair how adorable you were. “Or grab you some more blankets, anything you need.”

You hummed sadly, trying to draw your lips together to speak.

“Yes, love?”

He was so patient.

“I…” you swallowed, hands tiredly lifting away from your body and towards him, as outstretched as you could manage, “can I have… have a… hug? Please…?”

His features softened even further, if that were even possible, his eyes regarding you carefully as his lips curled into a smile.

Before he could answer—and make no joke, his answer would have been to take a seat beside you and instantly take you into his arms—there was a clatter, as the back door opened. Several voices swarmed over one another, littered with giggles and whoops as they bickered in the falling darkness.

Kun’s head turned to the kitchen, and he nodded as he saw what you presumed was the face of one of the members through the doorway. “I think you can get a really big one, now,” he remarked, a tinge of sadness in his voice.

Not quite understanding the situation, you merely pouted, feeling the burn in your heart.

Kun was extremely aware of how your face fell so drastically “I can’t leave them in charge of cooking can I?” Kun explained with a chuckle, worry tinging his voice. “Please don’t be sad, love. I-I’ll hug you later I promise.”

“Promise?” you asserted.

“With my whole heart.”

His words threw your own through a loop.

Kun meanwhile called out to the others, “Welcome home! You’re late, but I’ll let it slide if you come here and help me.”

There were a couple of confused ‘eh’s until a few familiar faces came into the room, shrugging off their coats.

You almost broke into fresh tears as you saw Xuxi’s bright, sunny smile drop from his face when he laid eyes on you.

“Y/N?!” he exclaimed, glancing at Kun for an explanation.

At the sound of his deep-set shout, Sicheng leant out from behind the giant puppy’s shoulders to see what Xuxi was so upset about.

He too went from quietly happy to extremely concerned at the sight of your reddened cheeks.

You quickly became very embarrassed. You hadn’t been cute crying, exactly, and you figured you still looked like a dazed, tear-stained mess.

That was when Ten slipped past the two of them abruptly, running over to you before you could even cry in surprise.

“No no, no…!” he cooed, perching very carefully on the edge of the sofa, his body turned completely towards you as he extended his hands to your face. He dabbed at your mottled cheeks rather frantically, the coolness of his fingers making you shiver, as they were chilled the winter, whilst your skin had been made hot by tension and stress.

“No, baby, are you ok? What’s wrong? What happened?” He glanced back at Kun who was heading through into the kitchen. “Kun, is it just my hands or is she running a fever?” Before you could answer he continued, eyes shining, “Are you hurt? Sick? Did someone hurt you?”

“They better not have hurt you!” Xuxi interjected, leaning over the back of the sofa. “If they did then you tell me their names, Y/N,” he said diligently, “I’ll make sure they never even look at you again I swear—!”

Sicheng rolled his eyes, a light scoff drifting from his lips as he patted Xuxi's shoulder, before heading round to the chair opposite you. “It’s ok guys, she’s not dying.”

He’d said it with a joking lilt and a gentle tone, but Ten’s mouth hung open as he shot him a look. “I know she’s not, but she’s upset and I’m not having that!”

“Neither will I!”

“Xuxi, you couldn’t hurt anyone even if you tried,” Ten returned, turning his full attention back to you. “Now, if my girl is not sick, and not physically hurt, then I know exactly what she needs, don’t I?”

As soon as he grinned at you, you couldn’t help but let the corners of your own lips lift. And, much like a chain reaction, as soon as he saw you brighten, even if only slightly, his smile grew into a beam.

“My girl wants hugs, doesn’t she?” he murmured, giddily tapping his finger against the tip of your nose.

You couldn’t avoid emitting a squeak at the contact—his fingers were too cold—but rationale had also left you in some parts, perhaps, as you nodded eagerly, dragging your arms up and throwing them out to welcome him in.

Ten slipped back on the sofa, pulling you into his chest protectively. He was careful to place his hands where they wouldn’t touch your skin, but also where you would know he was there, and so he nestled one into your waist and the other upon the back of your head.

Adjusting your position only slightly to lessen the pressure off the bridge of your nose, you settled your face in the nook of his neck, fingers laced in his shirt, as you took in the scent of his cologne. He must have several varieties but this one was easily your favourite—whatever it was. It was light, but deep and welcoming, with the openness of a spring day but the independence of a lucid dream, which was kind of how you felt held so close to his heart. You could feel it beating against your arm, seeping through your sleeves and sinking into your skin, through to your own heart, which skipped as soon as the thought of it all struck your conscious mind. You very nearly forgot about the others around you, though as soon as you’d been dipped into the waters of serenity, you’d been pulled out by your own awareness.

Ten was stroking your hair gently, though his touch was shallow to avoid both knots and making you shiver.

Kun was instructing someone about something, words just out of reach for you to piece together, but no sooner than he’d finished, a loud voice that could only be recognised as Xuxi’s, yelled, “group hug!” and a figure then bounded around the sofa.

You couldn’t see Sicheng, so had no idea what he was doing, but you heard a chuckle that sounded like his.

And a second after you’d questioned the reasoning behind his amusement, you felt a weight crash behind you on the couch.

Ten snapped up out of surprise, indicating he perhaps hadn’t seen in coming either, and with his hand leaving your head, you pressed yourself up slightly to try and get a better look at what happened.

“Hm—?”

It was no use however, because you were knocked back against Ten with a yelp from both of you, as the newcomer practically slammed his weight against your back.

Ten hauled you up as best he could so you weren’t stuck in a folded position but what you had ended up in nonetheless was still not overly comfortable. As you glanced at him you could see his lips wavering, formulating a sentence to most likely scold whoever had pushed the sudden attack with.

But there was no need, as you felt a pair of much longer arms encircle you and pull you more upright, a chin coming to rest surprisingly neatly on your shoulder.

“Hi, Y/N!” Xuxi sang, tapering off into a giggle as he gave you a tiny squeeze.

You laughed bemusedly, relieved to be alive, but also welcoming the warmth from the other side. Xuxi was in fact much warmer, to the point he could be described as an actual radiator, and with him smushed against your back you felt as if you were truly at home.

After a few seconds of his eyes evaluating the sight that he could see and you could not, it seemed that Ten appeared to accept it eventually too. Even with you practically stolen from his arms, he laughed it off, identifying that he could be perfectly comfortable laying into you rather the other way round.

With roles reversed, he slipped a hand up to your collarbone, resting his head just above the other, and seeking the opportunity to wrap one of his legs over yours, which was jutting out over the side of the sofa. Now you could see the room more clearly, and, with a tired laugh, you waved at Sicheng who was watching the borderline catastrophe with a confused but delighted grin on his features. There was a shade to his eyes though, something that you couldn’t quite place.

Peering over Ten’s head, you could see Kun leaning against the doorway, smiling proudly, as if the whole thing had been his doing.

Though thinking back to Xuxi’s sudden, but most likely inevitable, surprise attack, it maybe had been.

“Hi…!” You waved at him too, leading him to chuckle.

“Hello,” he replied, “you look better already.”

And with a brief scrunch of his nose, he was pushing himself off the wall’s edge and heading into the kitchen.

You pressed your chin into the crown of Ten’s hair, smiling tightly as quiet settled over the room.

You loved all of them, you honestly did, and you would never do without their bickering and yelling and screeching laughter. But it was relieving to hear peace every once in a while, with the only sound being the sound of steadied breaths—two pairs of which had become more-or-less synonymous with your own.

“You sure you don’t want to join us, Chengie?”

It was Xuxi that spoke.

You could have bet a million with certainty that it would be him that broke the silence. Man could never stay quiet for long, which was often one of the most endearing parts about him, as it often led him to some extraordinary lengths to find something, anything to say, crafting absolutely wonderful results. A lot of what Xuxi had to say ended up being enshrined as legendary tales that got passed down the long line of units until everyone had heard some form of what he’d said, and if not, they were plastered all over social media at the very least. At least half of them were your doing as well, in the sense that you were the prime messenger, relaying it to Johnny when you next video called him just to hear him one-up your story with one that originated from Mark, or Jungwoo whenever he visited.

The thought of how long he’d been missing for washed over you like sinking into a silent lake. He was back now, and you had been elated when you’d heard the news, waking up to a call from a no doubt bleary-eyed Jungwoo. But the pain of the near radio-silence at some points or his hiatus had been particularly tough to bear. And you hadn’t been the only one suffering.

You glanced back as best you could to the man who had spoken, his words on this occasion unfortunately not sparking much interest, as you waited for a response.

“No.” Sicheng shook his head once, voice neither amused nor melancholic, continuing, “But thank you.”

“Oh, ok! More space for us!” Xuxi’s responses were always bright and cheerful. You felt your heart lurch at the memory of the few times when they hadn’t been.

Meanwhile the man in question punctuated his words with another, tighter squeeze, which made you cry out in mildly strained laughter as you were brought back to the real world.

“Hey!”

“Dear lord…” Ten sighed, rolling his body-weight to allow his voice to carry into the kitchen. “Kun?!”

There were a few moments of silence, besides the sound of a knife meeting a chopping board from the kitchen. As you knocked your head back, Xuxi fingers digging into your sides, Ten proceeded, desperately trying to avoid your jolting legs, “When are the kids—ow!—when are the kids getting back?! Xu—xi!—is getting boisterous again!”

You freed one of your arms to poke your assailant’s side, making him jump and momentarily loosen his grip with a yelp—an opportunity you took without halt, shifting yourself out of his arms so you could tackle him head on.

“Ten, play nice!” you asserted gently, catching Xuxi’s hands and pushing against them as hard as you could with a laugh. You knew that if he was genuinely trying he would own you in an instant but you appreciated his instincts telling him to go easy on you. At least for now.

“I could say the same about you, actually!” Ten huffed, curled up on the furthest corner of the sofa and feeling rather discarded.

He watched the two of you wrestle, giggling through puffs of worn-out breaths, and couldn’t quite stop the corners of his lips twitching into a smile. He did find it endearing how you cared for the others, and how bouncy you could really get.

Though it was clear to say you were quickly tiring, and couldn’t keep up the chase as much as was perhaps needed. And so, he came to the rescue.

“Y/N! I’m cooooold…!” Ten whined.

Just because he was second oldest didn’t mean he was above whinging to get what he wanted.

Regretting how you’d unceremoniously shoved Ten off you, and accidentally somewhat kicked him, and then forgotten about the poor guy, you just about managed to slink your hands out of Xuxi’s with a quick exhale, swiftly backing off and sweeping your hands out of his reach as he tried to catch them again.

“Xuxi, no,” you murmured very softly, as if you were talking to a puppy, which to be honest it could be argued that you were, “Ten’s sad I gotta go.”

“Awh…”

“I’m also tired…”

“But what if I’m sad?”

Behold. There it was. The legendary Xuxi pout. Irresistible to those without prior training.

You shook your head, laying back to recline in Ten’s open arms. He immediately curled into you, cheek nuzzling your hair as he smiled victoriously.

Meanwhile Xuxi’s eyes widened further, glistening like clear gemstones in the evening light.

You held out your own hands, inviting him to come to you, however. “You can come and cuddle again though.”

He accepted that point, albeit a little sulkily, as he leant down, placing his head in your lap and a hand in yours as he arranged his unimaginably large frame into a ball to fit on the sofa, with room to spare.

It always confused you how someone so big could be so small.

Both their grips were a little firmer once they’d reestablished them; Ten’s now warmer hand had found its place upon the bare skin below the hem of your shirt, shielding it from the chill of the room while simultaneously making your heart beat just that little bit quicker, and Xuxi’s rested neatly around your thigh.

You were comfortable though, at last.

The kids, as they had been dubbed, arrived not long after, just as the delicious scent of Kun’s famous cooking began to fill the whole room to the brim. They stepped into a delightfully warm house, the tips of their noses and clouds of their cheeks blushed pink from the cold outside, and immediately they were stripping themselves free of their coats, as the temperature difference made them feel too hot to cope.

You’d rested in peace upon the sofa, kept warm but not too much so between the combined body heat of Ten and Xuxi. Sicheng meanwhile had taken out his phone a while ago, occasionally showing you funny memes and pictures he found. You didn’t really understand some of them, and he had to explain them, but you enjoyed it nonetheless, even if that same shadow tinted his eyes again as he did it.

As he entered the living room, Xiaojun regarded the sight of the three of you piled on the couch with curiosity to say the least, brows furrowing as he let the two behind him pass.

Yangyang barely scraped a glance at you, until he came back and saw it properly, smirking. “What is this?”

“Y/N was feeling sad, so we had to come and cheer her up!” Xuxi jumped in, shifting his weight upwards so his head was resting upon your stomach and where he could just about see the new arrivals.

“By… piling on the sofa?”

“What’s wrong Yangyang?” Ten snickered, before cooing, “Do you feel left out that I’m not babying you too?”

The youngest narrowed his eyes defiantly at the elder, who merely stuck his tongue out.

“Hey, you can join us if you want,” you interrupted cleanly, the wobble in your voice long gone.

“Can I?!” Hendery called from behind the two stood in the walkway, slipping through to poke his head around Xiaojun where you could see him. His lips were curved into a tiny little smile, eyes wide and clear and glimmering in hope for a ‘yes’.

“Of course!” you replied, hand leaving Ten’s arm and beckoning both of them over.

“I don’t think there’s any room,” Xiaojun remarked, exhaling amusedly as he hung up his bag round the banister, “you might have to take it in turns.”

At this, you felt both pairs of hands’ grips tighten, as if in reflex.

“But...!” Xuxi stuttered in his defence. “But I’m—!”

Ten meanwhile snorted in disapproval. “No, I’m comfy. You’ll have to drag me off yourself.”

“Not sure that’s a wise idea,” Sicheng said, barely looking up from his phone, “you’re the lightest one here, you know.”

As the two chaotic forces glanced at one another, grins affirming their idea before snapping back to begin stepping over to the smallest link in the chain, Kun’s voice rose above them all.

“Dinner’s ready! Come get it! The later you are, the less dumplings you get!”

It was as if it was a survival zone, as everyone barrelled to the kitchen.

Xuxi, no matter how loyal he could be, was always swayed by food, and so you had anticipated his sudden departure. However you could never have claimed to have expected the brief placement of his lips to the skin of your temple.

It was so quick and sudden and barely there that you couldn’t even begin to rationalise it. In fact, you only ended up conceiving that it hadn’t been a kiss at all. Perhaps it had never even been. You could have so easily imagined it, his lips grazing the air that surrounded you, muttering something instead. He could have so easily done, as you hadn’t really been listening.

Either way he slipped out of your hands, leaving you wrapped in Ten’s arms.

He—not that you could see due to the angle you were resting at—sent a glare to the retreating man as he made his way to the kitchen. He couldn’t help but do it, and he stopped as soon as he realised his features had become twisted in such a way.

He remained pressed against your back, unwilling to leave as he was not affected as severely by the thought of dinner, his hands remaining in their places in proof.

“Can’t we stay here and eat dinner?” he mumbled against your ear.

“I don’t think Kun would ever allow that.” You giggled. “Not after last time.”

“You never know until you try…” Without much warning, Ten tilted his head towards where Hendery had just exited from and shouted, “Kun?! Can Y/N eat her food on the sofa?!”

The man’s response was immediate. “No! Definitely not—! Not after last time!”

“See,” you snorted, patting his knee in consolation, “told you.”

The man rolled his eyes, sitting up reluctantly with you following suit, as he stretched his arms and back. “Fine. Come on, let’s eat.”

Dinner was a ruckus, as usual.

You cram eight people around a table and it will always be noisy, but if you then make half of those people crackheads and the other half happy to allow them to be crackheads, then you’ve got yourself a table of absolute chaos.

With the conversation flitting every few seconds, words bouncing from one side of the room to the other to a rhythm of laughter, many would probably have arranged to sit in their rooms to eat but you would never dream of doing such a thing.

Hearing the banter, weekly in-jokes and teasing was necessary, as it always lifted your spirits—as long as you weren’t upset at the time they picked on you. Luckily the previous cuddling had worked, and you were back to feeling ok, your problems not seeming so impossible anymore.

However, ‘ok’ was not good enough for these guys, and you knew they wouldn’t leave you at just that. They’d already given you some of their own dumplings (except Xuxi who had kept his to himself with a muffled apology) to you. And besides, you had a promise to keep to the two youngest.

As soon as you spotted the natural lull in conversation, you piped up, “Hey, do you guys want to watch a film tonight?”

Your suggestion was met with a flourish of agreement, only that two faces also fell.

One tried to hide it somewhat valiantly, no doubt to protect you from feeling bad. The other didn’t possess the finesse for this as such, and more-or-less openly sulked at the dining table.

You looked at the two of them. “Ten? Xuxi?”

“SuperM,” Ten remarked, voice monotonous, “meeting on tour dates.”

You let out a small ‘ah’ in understanding. You attempted to look on the brighter side. “There’s always next week…!”

Xuxi nodded sadly, while Ten huffed, earning him a side-eye from Kun.

“In my defence,” he began, holding up a finger to the eldest in a request for him to wait, “they’ve worked out all the dates that don’t clash for us. It’s 127 they’re having trouble with, and the managers there can’t seem to do basic maths, because they’ve confirmed two lots of dates that don’t actually work. It must be driving Taeyong mad over in Korea.”

“Why do you need to be there, then?” Yangyang asked.

“We don’t,” Xuxi emphasised.

Ten sighed. “No, I think we do. Even if we’ve outlined our schedules a hundred times, we still need to be in the room while they set the dates, for legal reasons. It’s just irritating that we have to sit there for hours on end, barely able to do anything to help, and if we do have any suggestions, that a—jerk of a—what is he? A producer? Executive? I don’t even know—he won’t let us speak half the time, because of his strange superiority complex that basically means he won’t allow us to ever speak, the absolute f—”

“Ten.” Kun’s voice was hard as stone, his eyes carved into a warning stare.

He sighed, standing and offering to take the others’ empty bowls and plates. “The point is, this shouldn’t be going on for any longer than it already has, and so tonight won’t be very peaceful, but it’ll be worse if we don’t leave soon.” As he leant over the table to collect your bowl, he whispered, “I’ll be here pretty much all tomorrow though. You?”

You nodded, eyes fallen at the sound of the mess he’d been drawn into. Everyone was so tired, him and Xuxi especially with their extra schedules, and so being dragged through that was only going to stress them out even more. They needed the movie night more than perhaps the others did.

Noticing the downturn in the energy of the room, as well as how crestfallen you appeared to be at his plight, Ten offered you a wink in response. It took a lot of energy to try to slow the tempo of your heart after that.

Xuxi collected the remaining utensils in one hand, giving everyone a big wave with the other. “We will return!” he announced.

“What are you going to do?” Xiaojun enquired. “About the ‘guy’, I mean?”

Ten shrugged, tilting his head to the side melodramatically. “Guess if he tries anything this time, he’ll face the pure wrath of this bad bitch.”

“Ten!” you cried in faux shock, a gasp quilting the air. “What have we said about swearing in front of the child!”

Laughter erupted as everyone synchronously looked at Yangyang, who was sending you an exaggerated scowling pout. “Not cool Y/N! I’m not a child!”

“Oh yes that’s right, you’re not a child, Yangyang,” Kun interjected plainly, leading the table to hush as each person accepted his words as an instruction to quieten.

Except everyone was wrong.

Kun glanced at you with a surprisingly sly smile, and then at Ten, then round the entire table, before looking Yangyang dead in the eye, and uttering the words, “You’re baby.”

A plume of cheers erupted round the room as Hendery shrieked with laughter, Xuxi dropping a spoon out of pure joy, leaving Yangyang to merely accept his fate as burned.

You bid both Ten and Xuxi farewell from your place in the armchair closest to the kitchen, soon enough hearing them slip out of the backdoor and into the night. But you barely caught Kun as he seemed to follow them.

After performing a near-comical double-take, mind ticking and realising that the person who had silently swept through in their wake was Kun, you very nearly leapt into the kitchen, the clunk of a car door slam piercing the darkness as your eyes searched for the leader.

“Kun?”

The man jumped nearly out of his skin, just outside in the cold, halting his motion to shut the door as you poked your head into sight. “Oh, Y/N. Is everything ok?”

You nodded, humming. As you stepped forward, you pulled your shirt further up to your chin to try and retain some heat so as to combat the flurry of new, cold air. “Where are you going?”

His eyes were transfixed upon your face, not that you could make that out in the dim light. All while he could distinguish yours much more clearly, the chalk platter face of the moon granting you a celestial glow from where it rose above the neighbouring buildings. “Oh, giving them a lift, so they don’t have to walk, since it’s so dark out,” he sheepishly apologised, “I should have mentioned it, sorry. But you can start the film without me, I don’t mind!”

“Oh, ok,” you mumbled. You had been about to say you’d make sure everyone waited for him, as you were aware the drive wouldn’t be long, but his words had stopped you in your tracks.

There was no way for him to avoid the dip in the glimmer of your eyes at what he had said, but he couldn’t push his departure any longer. “I’ll see you in a bit, Y/N. I promise I won’t be long.”

You tried to lift your arms in time to request that hug he owed you, but the door had closed before he could have accepted.

You couldn’t help but wallow a little bit in your thoughts for a moment. You’d wanted to have as many people in as possible, as those were always the best times. And you understood you couldn’t have Ten and Xuxi, so why couldn’t you have Kun to make up for it…?

He was helping them, however, and going by how freezing it was out there, you had to acknowledge you would have scolded him for not offering to drive them the pretty long distance to the executive building somewhat on the other side of town. It made you kind of hypocritical, and you couldn’t quite shake that thought off.

At that moment, there was a slosh of water that made your ears prick up, leading you to turn towards the sink.

You hadn’t even noticed Xiaojun there, doing the washing up as he’d been elected to by Kun as he left the table. You felt bad for a bit but it was surprisingly dark in the room, and in your defence, he’d been basically silent the entire time.

“You alright, Y/N?” he enquired, adding more hot water to the bowl.

“I could ask the same about you?” you glanced around the room, looking for the lightswitch. “Has the bulb gone again?”

“No, the light’s fine.”

“Oh, well…” You made your way over to the switch.

“Don’t turn it on,” he announced, tipping his head over his shoulder. The lights from the next room crystalised in his eyes, azure-gold and tracing a diamond upon his cheek. It illuminated the curve of his lips, as he spoke again, quieter this time, “Come here.”

You did what he asked, brushing his shoulder with yours as you came to his side.

You tried to meet his gaze, looking up to his face and drawing across his features, only to get distracted by the shine of his silver hair, tracing down his skin and curling round the shell of his ear so neatly. Plush lips parted as he spoke and you raised your eyes to meet his, only to have him turn away at the last second.

You were left with no choice but to follow where his stare was facing.

“Look, out there,” he whispered, gently placing a plate at the bottom of the bowl.

You peered into the garden, dimly lit by the light from the living room dancing beyond you, the faint silver of the moon, next door’s garden light, and nothing more—the sky starless and as dark and thick as ink. You couldn’t see a single shape, or even determine the colour of the grass, and it disheartened you to have to explain it to Xiaojun, who was clearly much more excited than you were.

“Jun? I can’t see anything,” you murmured, but he hushed you suddenly, leaving you to slam your lips shut, heart pinched.

After a few seconds he spoke again, voice barely above a whisper, “We have to be really quiet. And no sudden movements. She’ll appear very soon, I know she will.”

You frowned, glancing through the dark window, confronted by the hazy grass of the garden meeting the grey tile of the patio, and then your own musty reflection as your eyes switched focus.

You couldn’t see much of Xiaojun in the glass, the shadow engulfing much of his mirrored-self. However, you could see one half of his face, shaded as if through clouds, his crown crudely lit like a halo from the auburn behind.

A sigh very nearly left your lips as you stole another glance at his real face, his brow furrowing while his eyes narrowed into the darkness outside, teeth ever-so-slightly teasing his bottom lip as he peacefully waited.

It wasn’t fair how ethereal he was sometimes.

Suddenly he perked up, eyes widening, and leaning into you as he carefully pointed with a soap-sud painted finger into the black. “Look! There!”

You leant forward on the edge of the counter, eyes desperately scouring the garden until you spotted what he was waiting for.

A small bundle, tapered with jagged edges upon its top, snuffling through the shadows. A moment’s thought, and you finally put an understanding to the creature.

A tiny hedgehog, on the search for food.

As she came closer, you could just about make out the twitching of a nose, while she made a somewhat beeline for the fence on the left hand side of the garden. There you could just about make out a weathered blue pet-bowl, filled with some food of sorts.

“There she is,” Xiaojun sighed, whispering a laugh sheepishly. “I was beginning to worry there for a bit, I’ll be honest.”

A wide smile rose to your face, overtaken by the purity of an animal that small just... shuffling through the cold to find food which had been placed in the back garden—and just for her too.

“Did you…?”

“Yeah, the dog food was me,” he replied. “She only comes when it’s quiet here, which isn’t often but it does happen after dinner, as the others get quiet. That’s why I offer to do the work here, so I can check up on her.”

You couldn’t glance away from the hedgehog, especially when she finally reached the bowl and began to tuck in. Though it was in the shade and it was very hard to see anything besides the bowl by that point, made to stand out against the night by the brightness of its sides.

“She’ll eat it all no doubt, she didn’t come yesterday. Unless she has somewhere else and is just running rings around me,” he chuckled, picking up the plate.

“Why didn’t she turn up?” you asked, wrenching your eyes away to look at Xiaojun again.

The corners of his eyes rose as he wrinkled his nose briefly. “Xuxi’s euphoria last night?”

You stood confused for a second, trying to retrace your memory, until you finally struck gold. “Oh yea! Jungwoo’s message! I think it was everyone’s euphoria to be honest,” you sighed, laughter at how over-the-top-bubbly Xuxi had been at the sight of his groupmate just texting him ‘hello’ dwindling, “I’d been worried sick about him. No matter how many times anyone assured me he was ok, I knew I wouldn’t settle until I heard it from him himself.”

“It’s alright, I understand that. And I’m pretty sure the others do too.”

As your eyes fell, remembering the anxiety you had about his condition, Xiaojun’s finally settled back on you.

“You’re extremely kind Y/N, you almost care too much,” he said, “I know Jungwoo can’t wait to see you again, too.”

You finally met his gaze, letting a small smile rise to your lips as you did so. He was just so beautiful, you couldn’t actually look away even if by some bizarre curse you wanted to.

“Thank you, Junnie.”

“I mean it though, Y/N,” he insisted softly, eyes alight with a sudden certainty, “I worry sometimes you care too much about others, and though we appreciate it very much, I don’t…” His voice faltered, as if he’d spoken too much. “We don’t want you to hurt yourself in the process, and forget to care for yourself. We all love looking after you, but we also don’t want you to be hurt at all, if we can help it. So if something hurts you, let us know immediately, so we can support you… yeah?”

You nodded, swallowing as you felt your throat clench. His words were so kind—too kind. It made your heart wrench. Blinking quickly, you looked back into the garden, spotting the hedgehog making her way back to the hedgerow.

At that moment, a voice rose from the living room. “Y/N! What film do you want to watch?”

Somewhat grateful for the distraction, you felt the urge to cry dissipate as you took another glance at Xiaojun. He hadn’t looked away from you this time, it seemed, but you didn’t focus upon that for your own sanity. “I’d better go,” you said, “thank you for showing me the hedgehog. She’s really cute, I’m glad you feed her.”

“No problem, I’ll let you do it tomorrow, if you have time and would like to?”

“That sounds great!” You sent him a grin, covering any sadness you had felt a few moments before. Laying your hand on his shoulder for a second before you passed as a small farewell, you made your way to the living room to go help Yangyang.

As you reached the archway though, you turned back around to ask one more thing, the thought suddenly preoccupying you to a stop. “Oh, Xiaojun?”

“Yes?” He finished washing a plate and placed it on the draining board, peering over his shoulder at you once again.

“Does she have a name? The hedgehog?”

In the shadows of the kitchen, you thought you saw him falter, his lip waver in an attempt to formulate a sound, a shape, a word. Brash to the silence, you heard a stutter in his answer.

“Actually, no, I didn’t think... I just call her ‘hedgehog’.”

You spluttered at his seeming inhumanity. How could he possibly not name the poor little thing?

Your disappointment in him was obvious too, and so he hastily added, “Maybe you could come up with one?”

You reasoned with the suggestion, but it didn’t take long before you responded happily with a nod. “I’ll see what I can come up with. See you in a bit!”

After you left the room, however, he let out a sigh of relief.

He was glad you’d fallen for that excuse, especially since it was so far from the truth. The first thing that he had done, once he realised the hedgehog was a regular, was give her a name. And since she was adorable, with her little nose and love for food, he decided to name her after the first adorable thing he thought of.

He hadn’t foreseen the issue that would occur if he showed her to the person of which he’d secretly named the hedgehog after.

You spun round the door-frame, willing your thoughts to clear and dissipate. You clapped your hands against your cheeks to try and cool them from the raging pink they had flushed from your previous conversation. Being so close to him had hit a nerve within you somewhere, though what it was, you couldn’t quite comprehend.

As you passed through, Hendery slipped round the other corner and collided into you.

His sudden appearance made you jump, a rather pathetic yelp uttered past your lips as you quickly found yourself losing your balance after an effort to haphazardly make distance between the sudden newcomer.

Luckily for you, Hendery’s reactions were faster than your falling. He grasped your shoulder firmly, though in such a manner it made you wonder if he wanted to touch you at all—you were at arm's length, his fingers fanned out to rest upon your shoulder blades, his touch barely there, yet very much present.

You were quick to slot back onto your feet as you staggered to accommodate for his reflex. Only to push yourself further into his arms. You felt as if your luck couldn’t get any worse, face burning up once again as you almost butted Hendery’s head with your own. It was almost as if you were in some cliche skit where you had temporarily become a hapless staggering damsel for the day, and you weren’t going to have that for any longer.

You freed yourself from the sudden proximity with Hendery, refusing to make eye contact as you moved from staring at his exposed collarbone and instead the floor as you rooted yourself to it, folding your arms and huffing.

He watched you attempt to reclaim your pride, exhaling in relief as you seemed to grow in confidence once again. He had to admit, he understood well that you’d had a bad day, but he couldn’t help but find it odd how flushed your soft cheeks were and how on edge you appeared.

Meanwhile, his face had been a picture, lips pursed into an ‘o’ of moderate horror as he’d almost knocked you to the ground, which then spread into a wide smile as he giggled sheepishly. His eyes were clear as glass, dark and glinting and rueful, as you finally worked up the courage to meet them again.

“Sorry Y/N!” he said, mischief lacing his words.

You scoffed, staring him down, though feeling more of a rush flood through your chest. “Y-yeah, you will be!”

He laughed at your response, quickly dropping the issue entirely. You were grateful for that, you didn’t want to admit that he’d spooked that much. “We need to choose a film, so… what one do you want to watch?”

“I don’t…” you shrugged, “I don’t really know.”

You were glad that you didn’t need to look at him now that he had shifted to your side. You could feel his stare on you however, and it made you want to shiver.

He nodded, interlinking his arm with yours. “Shall we go have a look, my lady?”

Before you could let any words slip through your lips in bemused amusement, he pulled himself closer to you, arm interlocking with yours, and then led you through to the corridor with the shelves stacked with movies.

Slipping through the archway, thanking any deities that were listening that there was no reason for Hendery to be able to hear the heightened tempo of your heart, you found Yangyang already there. He was squinting up at the top row as you reached the rack, fingers running across each box like a small child reading the letters of their first book.

Hendery extended his free arm towards the shelving, bowing his head, “Your moving pictures, my lady.”

You snorted, taking in the sight of the stockpile of films. He was always so extra. In fact, it made it hard for you to focus upon the selection, barely registering the fonts of the titles and colours of the boxes, as you were hit by a sudden spring of sentimentality.

They’d been ordered alphabetically by title, and you remember the day starkly that you’d sat down with Xuxi to organise them.

He wouldn’t have been your first choice to help order things, since his attention span normally lasted around that of a cocker spaniel with a new toy, but he’d been the only one in the house at the time, and he was the only one tall enough to reach the very top shelf regardless (you still didn’t understand why that top shelf had been installed and even being used, because if Xuxi wasn’t around—which did occur often due to his new schedules—then it was a real safety hazard to get a film down from there, seeing that no one else in the group managed to grow anywhere near 6″).

On this occasion though, he’d been uncharacteristically focused, listening to your instructions carefully, his dazzling grin a sight to behold as he had cocked his head to one side whilst he thought—you could have seen the letters wafting across his thoughts as he counted them. He’d been very calm and rational, as if the bounce had been temporarily quelled, and he’d made jokes about how short everyone else was only a couple of times, too.

In fact, he’d been a very big help, and the afternoon had also proved useful in the sense that you weren’t the only one with a better idea of where all the movies were. Even if they were organised well, the two of you could still find them faster than the others usually could, simply due to the fact you could remember where you’d placed them on the shelves in the first place.

Kun had been extremely happy with the end result as well, which was always a bonus. Meanwhile Ten still didn’t believe you’d managed to get Xuxi to sit down and do it with you. You didn’t blame his disbelief. You could barely believe it yourself. But there he had been, clear as day, settling himself on the carpet without you even inclining to ask him to.

However, you did admonish the system you’d used now though. Perhaps taking the extra time to organise them into genres would have been better, as after all, you rarely knew a specific movie you wanted to watch.

You suddenly became very aware of Hendery’s presence. He’d inched forwards, his lips pursing out of the corner of your eye as he narrowed his sights on the possibilities for the night.

His movement had snapped you out of your thoughts, though it took a lot of effort to avoid getting caught upon the sight of his lips, beautifully curved and the perfect shade of rose—

You forced yourself to scour your eyes over the titles, eventually straightening to join Yangyang in peering up at the very top row, where the box-sets were kept.

“Whatcha looking at?” you asked Yangyang, a giggle thinly veiled. His thoughtful little frown was adorable, and it was clear he was thinking very hard about something.

“Did we watch the final part of The Lord of the Rings?” he answered.

You and Hendery both nodded.

“Oh... well there goes that suggestion then.” He shifted down from tiptoe and came to lean against the table beside the shelving, sending you a sweet smile. “Y/N, what type of movie would you like?”

Eased, you sent him a quick smile before glancing down at the films at the lower rungs. “I’m not sure, really. Nothing too heavy, and nothing that will make me cry.”

He hummed. “So, a comedy then?”

Hendery’s eyes went wide, a look of genuine fear playing on his features. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

“Why not?”

“Our senses of humour in this house, when it comes to films can…” he paused, silk voice tentative, “…vary, a lot.”

You nodded in agreement. “Remember what happened over that Robin Hood film?” You shook your head very firmly. “Bad times, my dudes.”

Yangyang cocked his head to one side in thought, frowning at seemingly nothing. “Fair enough…” Suddenly, he perked up, showing a grin you knew well. “I’ve had an idea. What if we watch a really bad movie, one that’s so bad, it’s actually kind of good?”

You clicked your fingers, before shooting him finger-guns, “Now that is a good idea!”

The three of you turned towards the mountain of films. It wasn’t long before your attention was drawn from them once again, as Hendery gently lent upon your shoulder, letting his fingers just brush the jumper at your shoulder. Once again you were convinced he wasn’t perhaps focused on the films.

“Ok… bad… films…” Yangyang murmured, pulling out a blue box to read its description on the back. You didn’t even gather what he’d picked out, as your eyes had been drawn back to Hendery’s as if magnetised.

As it turned out, he was a lot closer than you had previously thought. This time, it was his eyes that formulated the centre of gravity, and you immediately found yourself held in them, glistening mahogany so dark the tints stowed away in the shadows of the curtains of his fringe.

You sent him a smile, awkward and most likely faltering out of no reason other than mild shock at just how well poised his features could be, enquiring with a stutter, “Do you have any ideas?”

He smushed his lips together, as he usually did when he was thinking, something of which that always made your heart simper, and let his eyes wander away from you and up to the penultimate top shelf.

“’Azure Shadow’?” he said, reaching up and grabbing the box, his arm shifting lending his hand to consequently rest around the curve of your shoulder, fingers grasping ever so tenderly as if you were an artifact he wasn’t supposed to touch. You couldn’t help but freeze up at it, all while he didn’t even seem to notice, his voice as clear as a cloudless, spring day sky. “I heard it was pretty bad—hey The CP Times gave it 4 stars!”

Yangyang pointed victoriously, as he quickly realised a point he’d made long ago was now finally proven. “See! I told you guys you should never trust the CP Times!”

You were grateful for his interruption, as it drew potential attention away from you, stuck in your emotionally stumbling mess. You felt his grip tighten lightly, fingertips rubbing ever so slightly against your shoulder blade as laughter seeped into Hendery’s voice. “What? What problem do you have with the CP Times? I…?”

“Oh come off it, Hendery, you know! That awful article they posted about—!”

“Oh…! I see where your allegiances lie, Yangyang the Traitor!”

“I—what does that mean?!”

“They published a lovely one about my favourite—”

The hand finally left you, your shoulder falling into the grips of a surprising cold, but your mind began to pull itself finally out of its trance.

“And? They were horrible to mine!”

“They didn’t mention her though!”

To be frank, you had no clue what their little squabble was about, and it didn’t help that they kept interrupting one another. You shivered as you regained your sensibility, tiptoeing forward to urge yourself to enter the fray.

“Exactly!”

“She was on hiatus at the time!” Hendery countered, eyes bright in contrast to Yangyang’s wilder ones. “You’re just too in love with her, that’s what.”

Yangyang had no words for that. His mouth hung open like a guppy fish, as he scrambled for something to retort back. But he was panicked, and it showed on his face, as colour seemed to simultaneously drain from it but also rush to his cheeks.

“I am not in love with her?!” Yangyang was scowling, his voice jagged and incredulous and harsh. You winced at the unexpected sound, leading his eyes to quickly flicker to you. Any strength that had once been in them vanished before your own, as all fighting energy left his body limper. His voice was much quieter as he echoed himself, glancing away from you and staring at the floor instead, “I am not in love with her…”

All the while Hendery just laughed it off, as if everything that had just happened had been a ruse to rile the youngest up all along. “Yeah, yeah, of course. I got you.”

You decided it would be wise to intervene before their bickering ended in a tussle again.

“Well… maybe this film isn’t bad enough,” you remarked, earning a nod from Hendery and leading him to put it back on the shelf.

Yangyang remained silent for a while, even as Hendery suggested some other movies. His gaze was uncharacteristically vacant, while his presence had grown rather small.

You wanted to go over to him, to make sure he was ok, but there were many contradicting messages going on in the room, and you couldn’t really tell if it was that serious or not. One was behaving as if it was, the other as if it was not. Besides, Yangyang was neither super cuddly nor super solitary, so it was more of a case by case thing as to whether he wanted attention to help him calm down and cheer up or not.

“What about ‘The Man of Blade’?” he measured suddenly out of the blue, scoffing weakly as he retrieved it, “this one doesn’t even show its ratings, it must be awful!”

You skipped over to him, now given an inclination that he wanted to socialise. You really didn’t want to leave him, even if you didn’t know what the hell had just happened. And so you took hearing him talk as an invitation for you.

Placing your hand on his shoulder, you ducked your head in carefully. You wanted to see the description, but you also wanted to offer him some comfort, thus your cheek just barely brushed the cloth of his hoodie.

You had expected Yangyang to read it out, but feeling him shift his weight, perhaps just to accommodate for you, but you expected it was more out of sudden nerves, so you decided to take the role up instead.

As you cleared your throat in order to begin reading it dramatically to keep Hendery on side, Yangyang turned the box at an angle so you could read it better. You snuck a glimpse at him, to find a smile already filtering back onto his face. The signs of there being no lasting impact boosted your confidence as you found courage in reaching success.

“’A man makes a wish to a genie’,” you began, the corners of your mouth twitching already as you attempted to keep your tone serious, “‘to become the most powerful man to ever live so he could face God in a one-to-one’ battle to the death—”

“I’m sorry what?” Yangyang was back in business, ripples of his laughter seeping through his chest to where you could feel it, lending you further chance to rest your head fully against his shoulder.

All the while Hendery merely laughed.

You tried to hold it together. “—a-and restore not only his pride but his… his…”

“Oh no, what?”

Laughter bubbled in your throat as you forced the final sentence from your lips. “His valiant steed’s honour—yo, what the actual—?!”

Yangyang cackled as he began hastily opening the box. “It’s decided! We’re watching ‘The Man of Blade’! And we can all suffer together!”

Hendery snickered, shaking his head. “I’m sorry, but why the hell is that even here?! Who bought it?”

“It must be a present?” you insisted. “Surely! No one in this house would buy this in their right mind otherwise—”

“I bought it.”

Three heads simultaneously whipped in the direction of the living room.

There, standing in the archway, was Sicheng.

A moment of silence passed as the three of you stared at him, mouths agape and words lost, until you exclaimed, in more fear than you had perhaps originally anticipated, “Chengie, no!”

“Look,” he projected, before the other two could add to the confusion, “it was supposed to be dumb gift for Ten, something that I could hide his actual present behind, and so I decided to hide it plain sight until his birthday.”

A chorus arose. “Ohhh.”

“But, does that mean we can’t use it then?” Hendery questioned.

“Oh, yeah, damn,” Yangyang said, closing the box, “it’s ok Sicheng, we’ll put it back.”

“Actually,” you began, eyes flickering from each man, and finally resting on the box, “Ten isn’t here, so as long as no one tells…”

“We can still watch it!” Hendery finished, clapping his hands and motioning for the box. “Let’s start it up, I want to see the menu page!”

As the two fought over who got to put the disc in the player, their squabbling much more harmless this time, you made a mental note to ask someone about the debacle later, turning your attention currently to Sicheng instead.

His eyes, dark caramel and hidden from the light, were down-turned and avoiding your gaze. They seemed to graze across your cheeks instead, flickering up to your own only occasionally.

You offered him a smile, small and soft, and then walked over to him. “Hey, thanks for the film! It sounds perfect for tonight.”

“It’s no problem, I’m curious to watch it too,” he grinned back, before easing you out of the way of the two bundles of energy that bounded through into the living room, “I really hope it’s as bad as it sounds.”

“Oh it’s got to be!” you assured, feeling warmth settle back into your system, slowly, but surely, as you laughed. Relief felt good after all. “Come on, Chengie, help me get some snacks?”

“Of course.” He stepped backwards, letting you past to lead the way.

Back in the kitchen, you began to scavenge for all the food you could find, layering Sicheng’s arms with bags upon bags of snacks. You weren’t exactly paying attention to the number you’d piled, however, until you swung all the cupboards closed and aimed to place a final packet on top, only to find that you’d crafted a tiny mountain, and Sicheng’s face was practically completely obscured by its silhouette.

“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry Chengie, I didn’t notice how much…”

“It’s alright,” he answered brightly, peeking carefully round the precarious pile, “I got it!”

His smile was glimmeringly bright, and you couldn’t help but be stunned by it, since a bright smile like that wasn’t exactly common for him, even in the dorms. He stepped forward carefully to request the final snack be crowned upon the summit above his eyeline, and with caution, you obliged, balancing it on top as best you could.

“Now all we have to do is get you into the living room without dropping them—are you sure you don’t want me to take half? It’s not hard at all for me to do so…!”

He turned so he could see you. “It’s ok, you’re already doing too much by organising this. I can carry a pile of snacks, don't worry! Just… warn me if I get too close to an obstacle.”

You nodded, peering over his shoulder to see his way. “I can try and do that. I can promise I can help you avoid a chair, but I must warn you Sicheng, I can’t guarantee I can help you avoid other ones such as Hendery and Yangyang.”

You heard a laugh from behind the snack pillar, and felt your heart leap with pride as a response. It wasn’t that Sicheng was boring—no, far from it—it was just he wasn’t on the verge of being a giggling mess all the time like the others were. You’d guessed it came with maturity. Then you remembered how much of a dork some of the older members could be in general, and then admitted to yourself that you had to more or less discount that theory.

“Moving obstacles are always the worst,” he agreed, shifting his hands slowly to keep a firmer grasp on the mountain as he turned to make his way back into the living room. “But I appreciate your effort nonetheless. You ready?”

You hummed in affirmation, and the two of you began your careful trundle into the living room.

With snacks arranged on the coffee table, you slumped on the sofa, taking care to mind your feet as you went—you didn’t want to knock all your hard work on the carpet, as then you would have to vacuum it all up and unless you had someone to make the pain more bearable, it wasn’t fun in the slightest.

You watched as Hendery emerged victorious over the disc and scampered over to the TV, fiddling with the DVD player.

Yangyang, pouting from the sidelines, perked up once he realised that he now had a crucial advantage.

He bounded over to you, barely choosing a side and instead practically flung himself onto the sofa too. He threw his arms open to encase you as he went, and once his back hit the cushions, he pulled you into him.

Shrieking in surprise and glee, you shuffled yourself round so you could rest your head more comfortably on his chest.

“There,” he murmured proudly, a hand coming to pat your hair softly, “comfy?”

“Very.” Your voice was muffled against his hoodie.

Hendery glanced back over his shoulder at the sight, and hurried himself. You couldn’t see, and even if you could have, you wouldn’t have been able to notice the brief pang that hit Hendery’s heart at the sight of you snuggled closely into his warmth.

You would have been able to witness Yangyang’s smirk that he sent him as he began to make his way over.

All of this knowledge of course was obsolete to you, as you could see nothing at all, enveloped in warmth and seeing nothing but darkness with your eyes closed, your ear pressed against Yangyang’s heart.

Its beat was wild.

Sicheng meanwhile took a seat where he had been previously, spinning the chair around so he would be able to see the screen.

You heard it creak and peaked out from beneath Yangyang’s arms to catch a glimpse of him.

“Hey,” you called softly, causing him to swivel a bit further round to see you, “you sure you don’t want to come sit over here? It’s comfier than that desk chair.”

“But it is a spinny ch—” You hushed Yangyang before he could finish.

Sicheng smiled, the dim in his eyes growing as he shook his head. “No, it’s ok, I’m good here.”

“You sure?” You couldn’t deny it to yourself: you really did want him to sit over there with you. You didn’t know why, or what you wanted to do with him had he come over when you beckoned, because he wouldn’t have been comfortably with you draped over him in any shape or form, which you respected, but you also wanted to touch him in some way. You hated seeing that grey hue in his eyes that forced him to turn them away from you, you reasoned.

There was probably something more to it all too, but as per usual, your ramblings were interrupted by his response.

It was a nod, and the very gradual spin of his chair as he pushed himself back to face the TV subtly.

You tried not to take it personally, but you couldn’t hide the falter in your smile. It was hard to get all your feelings together sometimes after all.

Yangyang couldn’t quite see it at his angle, but Hendery could, and it led to him pouting at you as he waddled over.

“Y/N?” His voice was soft, as if he didn’t want the others to hear. You were thankful for that, if it was the case, as it wasn't that big of an issue, and you didn’t want to worry anyone else.

“I’m ok, don’t worry!” you declared. “Just tired, is all.”

Your response had been too fast, and it was just your luck that of course both Hendery and now Yangyang had noticed. You cursed your accidental volume, sending them both an eye roll as you played it down.

“It’s been a real long day, but you guys worry too much,” you jested, poking the arm beside your head.

You received a little huff from above you in a wordless reply, whilst Hendery quickly settled down beside you, inclining into your sloped body as he held your hand tightly, fingers laced with your own. They were a little clammy but then again so were yours, and you never cared.

‘Attention whore,’ you thought to yourself, a chuckle seeping into reality. Yangyang frowned at the random burst of humour, since no one had done anything as you did. He wondered what was going in your head. It was a merciless thing to chase, since no one would know, and he’d never really understand—that’s kind of how brains worked after all—but he loved hearing what you had to say about everything. He shifted his weight to bring you just a little bit closer, as if it would make a difference, let him understand why you were laughing.

He didn’t have long to consider much at all, with the film menu loading up and sending everyone in the room into a bout of horrified laughter.

“What even is that?!” Yangyang yelled above you.

“That, dear Yangyang, is an actual, colourised depiction of hell,” you countered, lips twisted in terror as you sat up instinctively. Yangyang too was tense—it was as if the atrocity had immediately set off fight-or-flight responses of every single person in the room.

Hendery flicked his head over to you. “In the shape of a horse?!”

“It’s never going to leave my head,” Sicheng murmured. “There it is. Emblazoned into the insides of my skull. Behind my eyes. I’ll never escape it. Set me free from this torment—”

“What’s going on?”

Xiaojun had come through from the kitchen, drying his hands on a tea towel and striding through into the living room as if he’d been summoned.

Everyone silently and simultaneously pointed at the TV, depicting the single-shot menu screen of an abominable CGI horse crowding the entire screen.

“I don’t—mother of sweet jesus—”

“I know right?” Yangyang exclaimed. “It’s horrifying. I hate it!”

“It’s actually cursed,” Xiaojun stated, unable to draw his eyes away from the savagery of art he’d been presented with. His mouth was agape as he leant on his hands, placed on the back of the sofa. “Obscene!”

Winwin’s voice was still low, but you could just about hear it over the whoops and cries of the others; “My sleep paralysis demon.”

“Is this what we’re watching?” Xiaojun asked, deep eyes wide and begging for the answer to be any cognate of ‘no’.

“Yep.”

He turned to look down to you, his expression torn in misery. “This crime to humanity?”

“One hundred percent.”

Xiaojun stared at the screen, eyes alight with the tacky flames of the anathema displayed before him. Eventually he snapped out of his cursed gaze and headed back into the kitchen. “Dear lord—don’t start without me!”

As the laughter died down, you settled back into Yangyang’s embrace, ushering Hendery to come closer too so you could have him near too.

He looked over to you, feeling the tug on his hand. With only a momentary pause to check if you were sure, he flopped down onto your stomach, exhaling happily with an arm stretched.

“You feel happier now, right Y/N?” Yangyang suddenly asked, voice low, and just below a whisper.

You were surprised, but nodded nonetheless. “Yeah, I’m feeling much better than I did before. Don’t worry.”

“Are you sure?” He cleared his throat, shifting his balance to support the extra wait Hendery brought to the table. “You’re certain we don’t need to enact special measures?”

You frowned, tilting your head up to come to look at his jaw, as he quickly looked back up to somewhere else in the room—or at least, anywhere besides the TV, for clearly very rational reasons. Bemusedly, you asked about his supposed ‘special measures’, but won little response. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed, before he glanced down at you, eyes flickering across each paradigm of your face with his lips pressed plush as he thought.

He parted them eventually, ebbing with air and possible words, until you felt the rise of his chest as he inhaled and readied himself to speak.

Only then did Xiaojun enter the room and take the final spot at the end of the sofa, patting Hendery’s legs to get them to move.

“Ok, I’m back, we can start now!” he announced.

The ball of conversation was knocked from its ledge and rolled in a different direction to what you’d hoped.

“Who has the remotes?” Hendery piped up, feet repositioned but this time on top of Xiaojun’s legs. The elder of the two wasn't impressed by it all though, and instead shoved them off by flicking his toes.

“I do,” Sicheng replied, already frowning at the buttons. “Can someone get the lights?”

“Sure.”

Yangyang stretched up behind him, hand awkwardly sliding up the wall as he sought for the switch. Eventually his fingers struck gold, and the room snapped dark.

And then the menu finally disappeared as the horror of a film began.

And by no surprises, it was utter garbage.

But it lived up to expectations in that sense, and it was thus absolutely hilarious.

You’d spent the first hour shrieking with laughter, and then you proceeded to tear each scene and every piece of dialogue apart as a five-piece.

The entire film was in itself a curse, a sin, blasphemous.

Hendery was slapping criticism on the plot left, right and centre to the point it made you wonder why he was here at all and not a movie critic. Meanwhile, Xiaojun just snorted at everything he said.

The two had come to an unspoken truce, after squabbling over where Hendery could put his feet. They were now situated on Xiaojun’s thighs, and swinging every now and again, especially when the owner got particularly pent up and passionate about a piece of dialogue or plot hole.

You felt your heart burn at how adorable it was, though also suffered the pain of the jerks that Hendery made every time he had the sole of his feet poked or tickled, which Xiaojun seemed to enjoy doing too much.

You stroked Hendery’s hair gently, lightly pressing his fringe out of his eyes where his head rested on your stomach, whilst you peered around to Sicheng to check if he was alright, having not heard a peep from him in half an hour or so.

What you found was borderline horrifying. He was completely engrossed in the movie, with a grin plastered on his face as the lights of the terrible CGI glowed in his irises and fashioned him into a cult leader in a fantasy movie, watching something demonic burn.

You hushed a chuckle behind your hand, as you leant back to turn your attention to Yangyang.

He’d been the forerunner of the jokes, cackling at every little thing and turning it into pure comedy gold for the rest of the people in the room, which you were very grateful for. The movie would have been brain-soup without him.

He’d re-positioned himself slightly so you were higher up on his body, head much closer to be of an equal height to his. This way you could press your temple against his cheek, if you wanted.

However, it was him that had his head nuzzled against you, his cheek resting in your hair.

He eventually quietened down as he grew more drowsy, instead taking in the scent of you, sweet and calming. It only lulled him into more peace.

With you in his arms he felt complete, in a way. As if he had a duty of sorts and when you were there he was completing it. Not that he’d ever tell you as such.

But he wasn’t sure what this meant to him, and he didn’t want to think about it too much.

A part of him deep down knew that it would cause some pain, somewhere along the line. And so he didn’t spare those thoughts the chance.

However, he couldn’t still the beating of his heart whenever you moved against him, whenever you looked at him and smiled.

As the credits rolled, there were several sighs of relief, but otherwise it was complete utter silence as the room tried to comprehend what abomination you’d just witnessed.

You glanced over at everyone to see if they were just as confused as you were. Seeing you were in firm company in your bemusement, you announced, “The Oscars are clearly rigged for this not to win.”

Yangyang snorted. “Of course!”

“Best film ever! Y/N couldn’t make a better one even if she tried.”

Xiaojun flicked Hendery’s toe for that one.

“Oh of course, honey.” You leant over slightly, arms gently squeezing the boy in your lap, giving him a squeeze. “And you couldn’t make a worse one.”

Hendery seemed to take it as more of a compliment as he grinned, nose scrunching as he headbutted you softly.

You tickled his sides briefly, seeking joy in the squeal that it earnt you, and let Xiaojun take the fall as he got kicked in the arm. You sent him an apologetic pout, not that you deep down meant it wholeheartedly.

“Ow! Y/N!” he exaggerated, “And to think I defended you!”

“Karma,” you responded simply, much to his chagrin.

“For what?!”

“For all the headbutts I got in the stomach?” you asserted

Xiaojun shrugged, admitting his faults and hence, defeat. “Yeah, that’s fair—”

It was Sicheng that interrupted. “Oh.”

His voice was disappointed, and where his melancholy suddenly procured from confused you, since you couldn’t see any possible origin anywhere. Had someone done something? Said something to dismiss him? More likely ignored him. You hoped for the others’ sake they hadn’t. He’d been so sunny during the movie.

You looked over to him, trying to veil your concern in its entirety, but still show care. “Chengie?”

“The time,” he said, holding up his phone.

It was nearly midnight.

“How long was the movie?” Yangyang exclaimed.

Sicheng answered, “Longer than you’d expect.”

“Well over two hours?” Xiaojun suggested. “But that time included the credits.”

“Haven’t you guys got to be up like, stupid-early tomorrow?” you asked, voice timid, fearing the ‘yes’ that you knew would follow.

A moan of irritation ricocheted across the room.

Xiaojun confirmed it for you. “Yeah, we do.”

“I don’t want to go…” Yangyang whined.

“I’m sorry but you gotta,” you encouraged sadly, “you need sleep.”

“And so do you,” Hendery added, kicking his legs off the sofa and stretching as he stood.

It was your day off tomorrow, though you couldn’t deny you were pretty tired. You decided not to protest. “I guess so.”

“Yeah, come on, otherwise Kun will be mad at us,” Xiaojun chuckled, “not sending you to bed at a responsible time, you know.”

You snickered, slowly shifting yourself out of Yangyang’s arms.

His hands seemed resistant to the idea, catching on your shirt as you moved away.

Eventually though, he was freed from any of the ‘constraints’ he had—and thus all of his possible excuses as to why he wouldn’t head upstairs too—and was ordered by you to head to his room. “Come on, Yangyang. You gotta go.”

He pouted at you, in a last bid attempt to get you to have mercy and stay just a bit longer.

“I’m sorry sweetheart, but I can withstand even the strongest Xuxi pout,” you explained. From behind you heard someone, the identity of which you could not tell, whisper that that was a lie, but you ignored it and continued, “I’m sorry, but you’ve still got some training to do before you can win me over like that,”

“Yeah, ok, I’m going,” Yangyang reluctantly nodded his head, mumbling, “Worth a try…”

Hendery followed second, waving to you as he went with that Prince Charming smile almost knocking you off-guard again. It hadn’t, but of course something else was going to succeed in its stead. That ‘something’ took the form of Xiaojun, bidding you goodnight with a chaste kiss on your cheek. You were startled to say the least, it had been so brief, but felt like it had also lasted for minutes. His lips were warm, soft, but you hadn't been able to hold onto much tangibility to them, as no sooner had they met your skin, they were whisked away again. Like the touch of a spirit, afraid of the rapidly rising sun. It seemed no one else noticed due to the darkness of the living room and the fact that most of them were already halfway up the stairs or gone.

You remained in the living room a bit after they went, pretending that you needed to stretch on the sofa for a bit before getting up. It was a lie, though, and you knew that well, and you felt your fingers tracing over the curves of the invisible imprint he’d left there.

“You need to head up too.”

Sicheng’s voice was light and airy, like the shadows had engulfed it. You barely heard him, but he made you jump nonetheless. With one hand at your kiss-embroidered cheek, you threw one down to your chest where you wished the weight of your hand would somehow slow the sudden spike in your heart rate.

“I know,” you assured just as quietly, “I’m just… taking my time.”

You could just about trace the lines of his smile in the dim light after he turned the TV off. His presence was faint, but what you could feel was warm and gentle.

He whispered something that this time you didn’t catch. But you felt the tethered urge to know what it was.

“Sicheng?”

“Don’t worry.”

You swallowed, knowing that you weren’t going to get it out of him, much to your disappointment. He had just said what sounded like a collection of random syllables, but together they had carried something heavy, something with depth, something that had been patient for quite a time.

He sighed, getting to his feet. You heard the crinkling of wrappers and the clatter of bowls as he began to tidy up.

“Here, I’ll help,” you began.

But as you sat up, you felt a hand press firmly against your shoulder.

“There’s no need, it’s ok.”

You frowned into the dark. He wasn’t looking at you, which was why his voice sounded distant. You could make out his silhouette, broad and proportioned as if he was drawn. He was like an artist's unknown creation, stood in the background of their studio, overlooked by many but appreciated much more than any by the few that knew him.

You worked up the courage to enquire about the occurrences earlier. “Why wouldn’t you come over and sit with us? Like, during the movie or before.” Feeling intrusive, you hurriedly added: “I mean, I don’t mind of course, just… you know?”

That caused him to look at you, dead in the eye, but he remained silent for the longest time.

You reasoned that maybe this was why he never made eye contact with you. Because when he did, it was like he was peering much deeper than just your eyes. His stare was the definition of eyes being the gateways to the soul. You briefly considered if this one worked both ways when he finally replied, eyes dipping away once again.

“I didn’t want to get in your way,” he cleared his throat, scooping up an unopened snack bag under an arm, “besides, you were already quite busy with the others, so… I didn’t want to overwhelm you with anything more.”

Your features softened at his words, a pang in your heart. “I appreciate that, Chengie. But please remember that you won’t overwhelm me or get in my way. I like hanging out with you just as much as the others.”

You could make out the smile on his face, small and sweet, before he ushered himself away towards the kitchen. “You need to head to bed, Y/N, you need some sleep.”

He was right, but you were convinced you weren’t going to leave until you got one thing. If you'd calculated everything right, he wouldn’t have a problem. In fact, it may just be what he specifically wanted.

You headed to the entrance into the kitchen and waited for Sicheng to come back. Upon his return, he almost bumped into you, but caught himself just in time.

Your eyes met in the darkness, lit by the streetlamp from outside the window far behind you. His hair glimmered with the golden haze, crowning him surreptitiously, as he wordlessly questioned why you were there.

“I know, I’m heading up I promise,” you answered for him. “But… I just... can I have a hug first? Please?”

With his lips pressed into a small ‘o’, he looked shocked by your request to say the least. You worried for a moment that you’d misjudged, and was asking for too much of him.

Before you could backtrack and hurriedly explain that it didn’t matter if he said no, you’d be fine and wouldn’t think any different of him, that delicately crafted yet stoic face melted right before your eyes into the softest smile you could have imagined. “Of course.”

The silhouettes of his hands rose in the dark, barely touching your body as he brushed them along the slopes of your shoulders. He was gentle, but they moved with a certain affirmity, as if they took a mind of their own, following an old familiar road throughout their long-left hometown.

You found your own fingers gracing his collarbones, before shifting up, your arms coming flush against his bare, smooth neck, and finally interlocking gradually behind him. Sicheng meanwhile rounded the curves of your upper arms, eventually spiralling around to make the jump to your waist, where they wasted no time in nestling into the nook of your lower back.

He held you delicately, but firmly against him. It was reassuring, despite the lack of time you spent there pressed into his warmth, as you felt your breath slow, and your eyes close.

He felt so… tender? Vulnerable? It felt like he really meant whatever he was trying to convey through his actions. You just felt at such a loss because you couldn’t figure out what it was.

As his head came to a gentle rest against yours, his hands secure at the small of your back tightening as if instinctively, it occurred to you awfully suddenly.

It was if he was hugging you like he was never going to get the chance to do so again.

Once you’d reached your room, you’d breathed a sigh heavy with a boiling froth of emotions.

In a cruel sense of irony, chasing after comfort had only succeeded for so long, as you were drawn back into the realms of stress once again.

It was of course something you could handle, you imagined at least—you’d gotten through the day of hell, you imagined you could handle a cornucopia of thoughts. Though you had to admit to yourself that there was a lot of string to unravel.

You couldn’t help but remember the thrum of your heart as Sicheng had placed his thumb against the cusp of your jaw while he gradually pulled himself away, encouraging you to go to bed. His palm had barely touched your neck, the contact was so brief it felt like the breath of a ghost, but you had found yourself barely able to use your lungs regardless.

For a brief moment there had been a light in his eyes, that despite the dark shone so brightly. And then he’d pulled himself away, and that grey from prior had returned, like clouds pushed by a November gale.

What did it mean?

Oh please. You knew, didn’t you? Deep down the understanding was there, not that you could perhaps believe it.

What you were rather dealing with was the question of what it meant to you.

You decided to watch Youtube for a while to calm yourself down a bit after… whatever had just happened, and consequently ended up staying up long enough for the others to return.

The sound of the door opening and the joyous cacophony of Xuxi’s laughter—instantly answered with incessant hushing from not just Ten but also synonymously Kun—reminded you of one of the no doubt many reasons why you were unable to settle.

Kun had promised to return quickly, but he had been gone all night.

You wanted to ask about it, desperately. However, this coincided with the fact it was very late indeed. And how comfortable you were in bed. But it was also going to drive you crazy all night if you didn’t find out why. Kun was a man of his word. He would never just… break a promise like that. Would he?

After a few minutes, once Ten and Xuxi had retired to their rooms, your disgruntled prayers were answered as Kun knocked on your door, face peaking through the gap.

You stared up at him, eyes big and expectant with your lips pursed. He had explaining to do after all. It appeared he was aware of this fact too, with guilt written over his face.

“Hey, Y/N, I’m sorry,” he began, “can I come in?”

You pretended to think about it for a few moments, even though you both knew the answer. He waited though, and it was only when you gave him a ‘yes’ did he come inside.

He sidled over to your bed, eyes sweeping the shapes formed by your bed covers, to make sure that when he eventually perched on the side, he didn’t accidentally sit on your feet interlocked beneath the blankets.

“I’m sorry, I promised I would come back but the other two swore it wouldn’t be long, and it would be more rational to stay,” he explained, “but then it took longer than they thought, but I couldn’t risk coming home only to then head out again and… I don’t know why I listened to Xuxi about it to be honest, it’s not an overly rational thing to do.”

“Did he pout at you?”

“No! I am above falling to such… charms…”

“Sure you are.” You arched an eyebrow. “Did Ten tell you to stay?”

He nodded, his eyes surprisingly big. He wasn’t really one to pull the ‘kicked-puppy’ image to try and gain mercy, but here he was.

“Well, I’ll let you off then,” you let the faux scowl fall from your face and giggled instead, “we know how persuasive he can be.”

Kun paused, eyes flitting to yours. “So you’re not mad?”

You scoffed. “Kun, I wasn’t even that mad to begin with, I promise! I can’t be mad at you for long anyhow. You’re just too—”

You’d let your mouth talk without your brain, and it suddenly occurred to you what you were saying. As your voice faltered, you weren’t sure what was supposed to follow.

Kind? Sweet? Cute? Handsome?

Kun was waiting for you to finish, and unfortunately, you panicked a bit.

“Kun.”

He frowned bemusedly. “I’m too ‘Kun’?”

You nodded awkwardly, while you interrogated your own intelligence in your head. “…To be mad at for long, yes.”

He cocked his head to one side, eyes narrowed towards but not quite at your bedside table. “Well, I mean, I prefer that to you being mad at me.” He exhaled, clearly relieved, looking straight at you instead. “Did you enjoy the film?”

“Oh it was awful!” you exclaimed. As you saw his eyes widen again, you laughed. “We enjoyed it so much.”

He was clearly very confused, and his lips wavered as he didn’t know how to respond.

You took some delight in his confusion, you couldn’t deny. “Well,” you propositioned coyly, “you’d understand if you’d been there.”

“I’m sorry!” he reiterated, eyes wide and searching yours for any sign of relent.

Normally, you would have perhaps kept up the teasing for a little while longer. However, sleep was lodged beneath your eyes, encouraging them to close.

“Ok, I’m sorry, I’ll stop now,” you laughed, though you felt a little bit guilty and sighed, sending him a small sweet smile. It still, however, occurred to you that he still owed you. “But… there would be something that would make it all up to me—”

To your surprise, Kun interrupted you, already one step ahead, “I know. Here.”

He shuffled along the bed so he was much closer to your body, arms held out for you. And you didn’t hesitate, much to his gratitude, levering yourself up with a temporary, newfound energy and straight into his embrace.

His warmth enveloped you, strong hands holding your upper back firmly, gently pulling you even closer. He didn’t even hesitate, nestling his nose into your neck, much similar to how you’d buried yourself into him.

Tender and tranquil, Kun seeped solace no matter the mood of the room. Some would perhaps identify this as a negative, but they would be wrong—very much so. He was needed to balance everyone else’s volume, brashness, fire. And you probably had very much needed him all day. Things could not be changed however, and the world kept turning even if you had previously wished it to. You wished for it to stop turning this time too, although for different reasons.

His fingers drew art upon your back, much to your soothed delight. It wasn’t something he did super often, but it was a characteristic of his: whenever someone needed comforting, he caressed characters into their back. They were often straight lines, as you’d found over the time you’d spent living with them, decorated with divots and curves.

His head tipped into yours, his voice a deep murmur, “I’ve been waiting hours to do this.”

Your heart skipped a beat. You couldn’t even help it, though you shook it off as best you could. You’d been all over the place that day, emotionally, so of course you were going to be reacting all fuzzily over general acts of kindness. Well, that’s what you told yourself. Besides, he was just stating facts.

However, you were distracted by a small epiphany that hit you somewhat out of the blue. The calligraphy he traced between your shoulder blades felt so foreign to you, and it took no shape you recognised. This wasn’t something new to you, admittedly. You’d felt these moments of tenderness before. And since you could assemble no familiarity, you normally led yourself to just move on. But with silence in the room, the pure stillness that so rarely occurred, you were able to pay a fresh attention to the patterns, to the weight of his hands. It occurred to you that his ministrations were not random. In fact, his fingers drew the same code into your shirt, over and over. It was a long line, three consecutive dots, another line—was it lipped?—horizontal, then swooping, then flat, finalised by two curves. And subsequently, it repeated.

You had barely an idea of what it was, but whether your scrap of a theory was right or not didn’t matter to you, as you were curious and were going to ask him nonetheless. He still owed you, you rationalised

“Me too,” you finally answered, frowned absentmindedly into his shoulder as you asked, “Kun, are you drawing something?”

“Hm?” He paused, confused by your words out of context.

“Into my back.” You shifted your face further into his hoodie, as if to hide yourself. Though it would be from him, which was slightly counter-productive. “You often draw as you hold me.”

“Do I?” Quickly though, his tact moved away from feigning ignorance, as he sighed, “Oh, that. I’m not really drawing, it’s more writing, actually.”

“Oh?”

“I-I do it to the others too…! Whenever they really need it. Though I’ll admit that’s not often,” he explained, his fingers halting as he spoke, “It sounds odd but… well actually quite silly actually…” he laughed breathily, awkwardness seeping into the corners of his eyes as he peered down at you. It was rare for Kun to get this anxious. “I write Mandarin kind of… without realising it,” he finished, “it helps the others and gives them some familiarity I guess? I figured subconsciously, I suppose, that it would help you a bit too? I don’t know really.”

He seemed pretty worried about what you thought—groundless, as you found his habit extremely endearing, actually, to the point you felt your heart swell. “Kun, that’s so sweet! Is it always the same thing for everyone?”

“No,” he answered after a moment’s thought, “I think I kind of write a specific one for each, but I can’t be sure now I think about it. To be honest, I don’t really pay—”

Your curiosity was not sated, and unfortunately for Kun, you couldn’t stop your nosey self from asking the question that this prompted. “Really? What do you write for them?”

“Well, like I said I don’t really pay attention to what I’m doing,” he responded sheepishly, “but… Ten gets ‘strength’, I know that one for sure, because I feel that’s what he has more of than he realises. Sicheng would get ‘ān’—you know, calm, content—because he is, but I've never had the chance to, as you, well, you know why. Lucas is lucky, he gets two characters because he’s ‘puppy’—”

“Obviously.”

He continued with a laugh that reverberated through to your chest. “—A-and I couldn’t honestly tell you what the others get. One of them I gave ‘loud’ because I think that’s what he needs to work on but—”

“I thought Lucas was ‘puppy’?” you snickered.

“Yeah, well,” Kun trailed off, “maybe it was him… I don’t know, I can’t remember.”

You smiled, releasing one of your hands from behind him to nestle instead amongst his hoodie as it had grown cold. You took this moment to work up the courage to enquire about the part that you couldn’t deny your interest was invested in the most. “What… what about me?”

He pulled away from you gradually, his hands coming to rest upon your upper shoulders, so very close to the sensitive parts of your neck. He studied your face, his own twisting into an expression of concern. “You really need to sleep,” he said, “your eyes are constantly closing.”

You pursed your lips at him. What did he have to hide about it? Was it something rude? It better not have been. “Hey!”

He cocked his head to one side. “What? They are. And you’ve had a tough day, you really should get some sleep.”

It was evident that it wasn’t him deflecting or avoiding your question—tiredness had seeped so far into your body that your voice had been barely audible, especially muffled by his clothes.

Hence you acknowledged his remarks reluctantly with a lethargic nod, before shifting yourself out of his grip, billowing the blankets out so as to allow yourself to lie down beneath them. Kun had stood to allow you more space, thus letting you curl up to conserve warmth properly.

He gazed down at you with particularly softened features. It was only in the dim golden light that you noticed how rouge his lips were naturally tinted, and how they curved into a smile as they opened to speak. Or how soft his cheeks were, as a long, slender dimple appeared as he did.

“You got everything you need?” Voice as light as silk, he leant over to catch your eyes behind the bundled blanket.

You affirmed with a simple nod, feeling your body give into the approaching heaviness.

You were barely able to work up the effort to speak anymore. The tiredness swept over you suddenly, but you didn’t fight it. Your body was crying for sleep, and your mind very nearly relented. But there was one more thing you had to clear up in some capacity before he left.

“Wait, Kun.”

The man turned back swiftly from where he’d gotten, heading towards the door. “Yes, love?”

You hummed, working up the words. “Something happened while you were out.” Upon seeing his face turn stony in concern again you proceeded before he worried too much. “Nothing bad! Just… Hendery and Yangyang had a bit of a bicker earlier. Over a newspaper? The CP Times? I think? Hendery really seemed to have struck a nerve though.”

Kun nodded, eyebrows furrowing in familiarity. “What happened specifically?”

“Well,” you sighed, propping yourself up on your elbow, as if it would help you think any clearer in your dozy state, “I think it had posted something mean about someone. Or excluded them from something when Yangyang thought they should have been included?”

“Yeah, that’d be the one.”

Confused, you frowned at him, silently requesting him to continue.

Kun winced as he drew forward a bit, in fear that the person in question would overhear from down the hall, “The CP Times wrote an article about YFCN—you know, the girl group?”

“Ohhh…” you drawled, things clicking into place a bit more.

“Yeah, one of the members was on hiatus at the time because she was ill, if I remember correctly, but the journalist wrote as if everyone was present and basically ignored her existence entirely. Lili I think her name was?”

You hummed in confirmation, “Does he like Lili a lot?”

Kun waggled his head slightly. “I guess you could say he’s a fan. Why?”

You shrugged, sinking back down onto your pillow, your arm struggling to keep you upright for any longer. “Hendery teased him about liking her, and Yangyang just… got all red and exclaimed ‘I am not in love with her.’ It really did come out of nowhere—and he did back down into himself after. He was totally fine once it had passed, though.”

Glancing back over to Kun, you saw his shoulders slumped ever so slightly, his eyes narrowed in pained thought at instead your blankets. His energy seemed to drop and disperse, just as though he had something he needed to mull over.

In fact he was suddenly thinking over what you’d told him very carefully. “Did he say it like you said it to me?”

Your eyes trailed away from him as you nodded, fiddling with the covers of your blankets. “Why, do you think he was lying?”

His head flicked up to you at hearing your interpretation. He couldn’t believe you had ignored the emphasis in Yangyang’s words; you were usually so in touch and intuitive with the group’s tones. He excused it though, and waved it off as nothing to further worry about—you’d had a long day, the intricacies of Yangyang’s secrets were not exactly your top priority that evening.

However, this did leave him with a dastardly tantalising opportunity. He could take control of part of the narrative. He could curb some of the risks, even manoeuvre himself into a better position. It disturbed him how big of a part of him actually wanted to seize the chance and bathe in the possible outcomes.

Luckily, his morality immediately crushed those considerations, coupled with a healthy dose of realism. It wouldn’t be fair to anyone, especially you. And that was not the sort of person he wanted to be. Ever.

Meanwhile you had your own subtle pain to fret over. Its origins were difficult to distinguish, as they always appeared to be that day. If Yangyang had a crush on Lili then it made perfect sense. She was gorgeous and strong—you were familiar with her group’s music, and you could never say you didn’t approve of his choice. She was the lead rapper, and an absolute badass with her own neon-punk style that contrasted so drastically but also gelled so well with the others in her group. It was no surprise he liked her—hell, if you had to choose a bias yourself you would choose her—and so you shouldn’t have been surprised. And, in all degrees, you weren’t.

No. Instead you were stuck with this uncomfortable pit in your stomach. A swollen stone that weighed just a bit too much for you to dismiss.

“I don’t know,” Kun finally finished, almost making you question yourself if he’d spoken without you even realising, caught up in your own head. He hadn’t, but it made you realise how correct he was in suggesting you go to sleep.

Watching your eyes anxiously wander about the room, he added hastily, “I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about. You know how weird those two are sometimes.”

You chuckled softly, and Kun found himself inclining towards you, just to catch a better glimpse of the beautiful sound; only for him to stop himself just before his movement became noticeable.

“Anyway,” he sheepishly started, never intending to ever finish.

You echoed him, before letting yourself take in his face one more time for the night. No matter where or what the lighting was, he was incredibly handsome.

Settling into your pillow at last, your subconscious finally quelled itself, agreeing at last that it was maybe time to give into that small, tired voice that begged you for rest.

Kun was grateful you were calming down, and as soon as he spotted his relief he felt the fangs of guilt bit into his neck. He didn’t want to leave you in any distress, and so he wanted to stay with you for as long as possible. But he also had his own emotions that were now deciding to not remain in check. And he hated it, but he had to acknowledge that he inevitably needed to be left alone to have his epiphany, and motivate himself into a game plan.

He nodded absentmindedly, straightening up and heading for the lamp on your bedside table. As his fingers flipped the switch and the room was plunged into darkness save for the blade of silver from the hall, his brain stuttered.

He’d wanted to do something for a very long time, and this was the perfect opportunity to do it. In fact it would be a way to get ahead of everything, perhaps. And it wasn’t like there was no evidence for his wishes. You’d already been desperate for a hug from him and him specifically.

But it was if his words were stolen, his movements forced to a halt.

Was it fair to do anything after all?

He wasn’t sure.

And so the lights went out, and he felt his feet moving by themselves towards the doorway, arm outstretched instinctively towards the handle, but too early to catch it—away from where he truly wanted it.

“Goodnight, Kun,” you called after him, watching his retreating silhouette carve a shadow in the light from the hall. He looked so tall and impending all the way over there. It was rare for him to be so tense—in fact, you couldn’t name a single instance where he was this pent up, and the other members could be a real hassle when they wanted to be.

As you began to worry in your sleep-deprived state for him, he reached the door and held it open. His head turned, and he stole a long, gradual glance into the darkness to take in a glimpse of your face. You already had your eyes half closed, cheeks sweet and squished against your pillow as you squinted over to him, waiting for his next move. You looked so adorable wrapped up and surrounded in warmth, and with your hair crowning you, gifting you a makeshift halo, your temple was left exposed and waiting.

But Kun, as he cursed himself numerous times in his head, was a coward.

“Goodnight, love.”

And with that he left the room, leaving the door ajar just how you liked it.

As he trundled to his room not far down the corridor, his knuckles reached up to his chin, and then his lips, where they rubbed uncomfortably hard.

There would be another time. Surely? He prayed that there would be, and that it was him alone who got the opportunity. But he couldn’t bring himself to believe it.

Hearing the click of a door from further down, he desperately slipped himself into his room, narrowly failing to avoid Ten’s omniscient eyes as he exited his bedroom.

He didn’t know where the younger was going, and he didn’t want to know, his brain was too preoccupied with other things.

Yet he knew that he knew too much. Ten knew everything. Kun didn’t have any proof, or know for sure, but he had a feeling that the guy thrived off knowledge, things he could perhaps perhaps spin.

No. That was too far. This was all just a strange bout of paranoia.

But he couldn’t deny his disbelief at how all the members never chose Ten as the member they were most afraid of on variety shows. Maybe it was the age dynamic.

“And there’s no evidence to show that Ten would ever do anything low like that,” he murmured to himself as he closed his bedroom door, “pull yourself together, Kun.”

He let himself exhale all the air that had built up in his lungs.

The conversation overall for him had been around a solid 4 out of 10 in terms of success. Not ideal.

He guessed he had to count his blessings though, that you didn’t apprehend his deflection prior over the characters. The idiot he was. Tracing ‘love’ into your back without even realising.

He was entirely lovesick.

And now he knew he wasn’t the only one, too. Of course he wasn’t. Why he hadn’t realised it sooner was a real challenge to his personally-perceived trait of ‘aware’ that he often took pride in.

It was him, and Yangyang. But was it just those two? His thoughts flipped like a switch, as if the vintage slideshow in his head had changed and had confronted him with nothing more than the purely angelic moving picture of you. Giggling when he had bought you ice cream at the beach, eyes gazing wide up into the grey skies as you’d been caught in a downpour and huddled under his tiny umbrella, the peace upon your features that he had just witnessed.

He had to come to the conclusion that it was most definitely not just him and Yangyang.

Xuxi? Of course. The kid couldn’t hide anything, and he had seen the way he stared at you 24/7. The optimist in him had just dismissed it because he didn’t want it to be true. There wasn’t a lot he had on the guy. It was purely down to your preference, as he lamented to himself, because there was no way he could compete with Xuxi’s face, his humour, his doting, puppy-love affection.

The qualities Kun did have were somewhat echoed in Sicheng though, he decided. And was it him too? He was always willing to help you. And just because he kept to himself more… Kun resolved he couldn’t count him out.

And Xiaojun? God, he wasn’t sure, but would he explain to him what he named the hedgehog after? No.

The leader cursed under his breath. He was in trouble to say the least.

Again, he questioned himself why he was so surprised. You’d been living with them for a while, for efficacy to begin with. And then you’d chosen to stay. It was practically inevitable that since he’d fallen so quick and hard that the others would obviously do so too.

He was left to establish Ten’s involvement, and the diagnostics were hardly in his favour there either.

As he contemplated everything, sitting on his bed with his phone discarded in his hands, the man in question meanwhile barely let himself look away from where the retreating shadow of his leader had stolen away to, so guilty-like. Ten’s gaze was only snatched away by the image of your passed-out face that he caught a peek of through the gap in the door.

Your beauty glimmered in his mind, a fuzzy image hazed with holy pink. And then he was silently taking the stairs, his mind becoming stuck on the picture of Kun’s eyes that he’d briefly seen before his head ducked away, and now covered his thoughts of you. They were glazed over, his real priorities tucked elsewhere. And as he noted where he’d just come from, and the context for the entire day, it wasn’t difficult for Ten to connect the dots.

He knew.

~~~

AN: here it is. The final piece. look out for the coming Endings!

Also, all film names were randomly generated on a title generator. If they are actually the names of films then they weren’t intended to be.

Ending One - Kun Ending Two - Ten Ending Three - Sicheng Ending Four - Lucas Ending Five - Xiaojun Ending Six - Hendery Ending Seven - Yangyang

Masterlist

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dialovers-translations · 4 years

Text

DIABOLIK LOVERS MORE, MORE BLOOD Vol. 1: Sakamaki Ayato [Track 5 + Epilogue]

Original title: どこへも逃げられない ll エピローグ

Source: Diabolik Lovers More, More Blood Vol. 1 Sakamaki Ayato [CD not owned by me]

Audio: Here ll Here

Seiyuu: Midorikawa Hikaru

Translator’s note: Part of me was expecting another plot twist in which Ayato’s plan backfires and he has to find a way to break free from the loop, but it seems like it’s just the MC getting the short end of the stick here, lol. Getting your blood sucked over and over seems painful, but at the same time, the CD does a pretty good job at convincing you that it’s actually pleasurable? One thing’s for sure, I wouldn’t mind listening to Ayato’s sexy voice forever. The tone of his voice is just so much lower and more seductive in these solo drama CD compared to the ones that feature multiple characters.

This track was requested by @derangedsilence! If you would like to request a translation, please contact me through IMs or drop an ask!

Track 1 ll Track 2 ll Track 3 ll Track 4 ll Track 5 + Epilogue

Track 5: Nowhere to Run

“Well then, first I should punish you for trying to get away from me. I’ll make it loud and clear that you have nowhere to run.”

You back away.

“Heh. You don’t know when to give up, huh? However, if you keep backing away, you’ll hit the wall. Trapping yourself in a corner like that...You’re basically begging to be assaulted.

Hey, classes are a pain, but don’t you think the after school time is nice?”

Ayato starts stepping towards you.

“You can kill some time doing the things you like and such. No matter what you do, nobody’s there to scold you.”

He pins you against the wall.

“No matter how many times I repeat the same scenario, I don’t get bored at all. This after-school...No matter how many times I corner you, no matter how many times I bite you...Your screams and lewd expressions never fail to turn me on.

So? What are you gonna do now, knowing that I’m the one who has been manipulating time? You’ve been pushed around by me this whole time...How does it feel?”

You beg him to stop.

“Heh. As if I’d pass up on such a fun way to mess around. This scenario has been repeating itself so you know already, right? I’m thirsty right now. Each time your clothes got in the way, huh? I’ll make it easier to drink for me.”

He rips up your uniform.

“What are you screaming for? Aren’t you already used to this stuff? You’ve been stripped down by me plenty of times up till now. Or are you perhaps trying to seduce me? In that case, I can’t give you much credit. Let me hear a better cry.

Ayato places one hand on your exposed skin.

“Hehe. Incredible. When you’re this heated, isn’t it rough on you as well? To think you’d become like this from memories alone, you’ve exceeded my expectations.

...Hey. You remember every single time I bit you, right? The pain from having my fangs rip through your skin...The aching sensation running through your veins...Recall all of it. On top of that, I’ll fire some more pleasure at you. I’ll make you feel it with every cell of your body.”

He bites you.

“Nn...Haah...Woah there! Don’t you dare collapse just yet! Come on, stand up on your legs. I told you this is punishment for running away, right?”

He steps back.

“No trying to cling onto me. Next time you sit down without my permission, I’ll drink blood from your entire body. Until there’s not a single drop left. I don’t really care if you die. All I have to do is rewind time. I’m sure you’d remember the sharp pain of being sucked dry by my fangs though.”

You look terrified.

“What a miserable expression. I can’t get enough of your frightened face. I get to do what I want with you, meanwhile you can’t run away ー However, isn’t it fine like this? I bet you’re overjoyed to get messed up by me. You don’t even need to reply for me to know. The scent of your blood got sweeter again.”

You nearly lose your balance, too frightened to even say anything.

“Say, your knees have been shaking this whole time. If you’re having that hard of a time standing, place your hands ‘gainst the wall. Come on, turn around.”

You do as he says.

“Now you don’t have to sit down, right? You better be grateful for my kindness. Although now you don’t know what I might do to you from behind.”

He kisses your neck.

“Heh. It has seriously gotten sickingly sweet. I might just get drunk on the scent alone. How does the sensation of being sucked by me remain? Are you getting worked up by recalling it inside your head? Or does your body remember instead? Well, either way, like this you’re no different from a cat in heat. I wonder what will become of you if I keep on looping time over and over.”

You beg for mercy.

“Hehehe. You want me to stop rewinding time? Then say it. ‘Ayato-sama, I’m begging you. Don’t use the hourglass. In return, you can have as much of my blood as you’d like’, that is.”

You shake your head.

“If you can’t say it, I don’t mind just going back in time again. I’m sure you’d lose your mind from being bitten by me repeatedly though.”

You finally give in.

“Heh. So you finally said it? Fine by me. I’ll suck you plenty.”

Ayato bites you once more.

“Haah...This is dangerous. I’ve gotten heated as well. Hey, you feel great too, right? Remember this feeling very well. I’ll rewind to right before I began to drink your blood.”

You protest.

“Did you really think I’d stop just because you listened to me? Fool. I never said anything about stopping.”

*Tick tock - Tick tock - Tick tock - Tick tock*

“Heh. It’s a pain how the uniform I got rid of earlier is back in place though.

...Hey, you’re aching, right? Your blood’s gotten incredibly sweet...Even though I haven’t done anything yet. Right here...The mark I left with my fangs earlier has faded as well. I mean, it’s obvious. Hahaha. Are you going crazy just from having me trace over it? I bet. According to your memories, you’ve had your blood sucked mutliple times by now, so the inside of your head must be a hot mess.

You want me to bury my fangs deep inside, right? You can no longer be satisfied unless I bite you strongly, giving you the kind of pain that makes your toes curl. Say it. What do you want me to do? Come on, say it!”

You beg for his fangs.

“Heeh? You want me that badly? Then put me in the right mood. Try and beg for where you want my fangs.”

You start exposing your skin.

“You must be really desperate to start stripping down by yourself. Your skin hasn’t even been scarred yet, but the scent of blood is already overflowing.

You’ve become like that just from being touched? Are you that frustrated you could just cry? In that case, I don’t mind playing ‘round with you for a bit. It’d be fun to see how long you can last while being denied what you want. If you don’t want that, you know what to do, right?”

You nod.

“Okay. I’ll bite down deep. Go crazy!”

Ayato bites you vigorously.

“...It almost burns my throat. This might just make me go crazy as well. Hey, you’re about to lose it as well, right? Receiving even more pleasure when you’re already on the breaking point...However, this isn’t the end just yet. If we rewind time, we can do this at any time even if you run out of blood. Even if I hurt you, I can turn it back...Even if you’ve been sucked dry, we just start over...I’ll lock you up in an endless loop.”

You retaliate.

“Heh. You’re still saying that? Are you that scared of what lies ahead? If time rewinds again, you’d be in trouble after all. But isn’t it fine? Seeing you slowly become a mess...It makes it so worth it. (1) I’m having a blast so it’s fun for you as well, right?”

Ayato picks up the hourglass.

“Well then, shall we rewind one more time?”

You shake your head and beg for him to stop.

“I can’t get enough of your desperate, crying expression. Just how long will you be able to remain sane, I wonder? I’m looking forward to it.”

Track 6: Epilogue

“...Ugh. What? She fainted. Did I have too much?”

Ayato walks closer.

“Ah-aahー The blood’s dribbling down...What a waste.”

He laps it up.

“Haah? Hehehe...Feeling it even in your sleep, huh? Great. Feel me at any time. I’ll engrave who you belong to into your body. When you wake up, we’re going at it again. After having my fun watching your frightening expression, I’ll give you my fangs. Over...and over...and over. I’ll make you lose your mind. You’ll no longer be able to live without me.

Hey? Aren’t you happy too? For eternity ー you’ll belong to only me.”

ーー THE END ーー

Translation notes

(1) Ayato uses the phrase くるもんがある or ‘kuru mon ga aru’, which according to @maimaiotome is the Japanese equivalent of ‘to have an axe to grind’ in English. I wasn’t familiar with this expression myself but it means that you do something with selfish intentions in mind or with an ulterior motive.

--> PROCEED TO ANOTHER STORY [DELUXE EDITION]

#diabolik lovers #dialovers #ayato sakamaki #diabolik lovers more more blood #diabolik lovers translation #diabolik lovers drama cd #drama cd

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