#quarter disorder

[quarterdisorder]

#gargoyles #gargoyles remastered #disney #disney games #gargoyles disney #nintendo switch #ps4 #ps5 #xbox one #xbox series x #steam #sega #sega genesis #retro games #retro gaming #video games #gaming #quarter disorder

[blurred-antics]

i hate that the medical industry doesn't take reproductive health seriously when you have a uterus/ovaries. i hate that the only solution for 99% of issues is birth control unless you visually have an immediate complication, and even then sometimes the answer is still just birth control. i hate that companies don't let you have paid time off. i hate that asking for help is seen as weak or that you're lazy for being unable to do it all alone.

#im going to fucking throw up from both pain + stress i am so fucking angry #why! do i have to try and convince doctors they should do a laparoscopy on me to check for endo #when i am left unable to even take care of myself on my worst days #when i have uncountable blood clots the size of nickels and quarters and larger every single period #when i have pain from my ribs to my knees #when its been shown that there is a connection between my connective tissue disorder + endometriosis #when i have a family history of endometriosis #and even if i can!! convince the drs!! theres no point! #bc it's just my partner and i and our kid and he cant take off work to help me recover #and meanwhile in recovery I'd be completely unable to tend to a toddler #so literally what is the fucking point!!!!! #i want to fucking scream and scream and scream #mine #rambles #will probably delete this later #im just #so fucking pissed rn

[rosalesbeausderholle]

My cousin who has money bc she's a doctor gifted me and my gf a spa voucher???? Omg

#now i can't criticize the weird was she's feeding her daughter #that child is starving for sugar #she ate a full quarter of the top part of the roscón the other day #and she's a tiny 20 month old #like tiny #but my cousin is super obsessed with imposing daily límits on sugar x number of fruits a day etc for maximum nutrition #one more cookie than the plan allows is a disaster #that child is bound for an eating disorder

[muirneach]

WHAT‼️

#having one of those eras where i read a bunch of medical wiki pages #last night i was reading about concussions. mad interesting. my favourite pages r still the ones on depression and bipolar disorder tho #anyways. what! wdym ONE QUARTER of the world. #wikipedia

[void-tiger]

Sometimes I feel like I keep having to prove my age. “No really, I really am 29. I really did start college 10 years ago (just…couldn’t finish). No I’m Not actually 15-21. YES really. It’s okay to talk to me. (But please don’t ask me what I’m doing instead of what I like to do…it’s a sore subject I can’t find a Small Talk TM response to. Especially with my age. Legit health shit has taken SOME of the embarrassment out of this…but that’s it’s own set of landmines. Can we please talk about you instead??)”

#tiger’s musings #socializing crap #baby face #aaaaand then prolly ‘cause of the connective tissue disorder…I have MASSIVE dimples that make me feel like a gargoyle #not age wrinkles forming. but huuuuge folds of skin on a thin face making ridges #because…stretchy skin. yeah. I feel like that snake in that one webcomic trying to Yawn Cute #and…it’s most obvious if I’m delighted or teasing. #…why can’t I just have smile lines. #but…yeah. I almost can’t complain I never have any decent adults act friendly or flirt in a way that’s Not Creepy #when even YOUNG children forget that I’m ‘not a kid’ #(ooooor it’s some fertility culture or ‘wants an Exotic TM girlfriend’ asshole. for fuck’s sake… #(yes I’d rather be harassed than an actual teenager or ethnic/racial minority. but it’s still deeply uncomfortable) #…there may be SOME progress with ‘YES I’m a late 20s ADULT prioritizing FRIENDSHIP I am SAFE’ #but also…it is irritating to have questions about something 10 yrs ago instead of what I like to do NOW #or that it took a year to be spoken to. and going pspspspsps! for a quarter of that because Enough. #…the ONLY time I /almost/ don’t mind someone assuming I’m nearly half my actual age #is when I’m out in public with my parents around strangers #despite it’s becoming more common for MY gen to still live with fam because late capitalism vs merican social values #buuuuuuuuut yeahhhhh… still living with family past 25 is still treated as Shameful as a cultural norm

[david-watts]

kinda mad that I bought myself something as a treat, hid it, and it’s been removed from the hiding spot twice and half used (without asking) and on top of that stuff was left in it

#I stopped doing this for two reasons one it's not good for me (hence treat) and the other was EXACTLY THIS #like I put it in a spot she couldn't reach without rifling through everything since it's above her head and the things in the way #would prevent her reaching it without moving them #like fuck's sake #I might've even been ok had she asked! but no! #it's her house therefore anything's ok for her to take #if I confront her about it she'll call me a pig (even though I eat 'better' than her because I eat more because I'm a foot taller and #a quarter of her age she loves calling me a pig for eating at all) and then say 'well my money paid for it' #even though she didn't I DID #the combination of her not asking her leaving crud in it and that I bought it for myself is just. grrrr #like I'll legitimately just eat a salad with a bit of meat (which I have been told to do by a dietician) and get called a pig #for eating 'all that'. it was literally a preportioned size from the supermarket plus a little extra on instruction. hate her for it #like congrats you've caused eating disorders in like four members of your own family! #maybe I'm just upset because I'm sick and she's going at me for selfish reasons

[ourlordapollo]

Listen I know this is bad practice for 99% of Anxiety Havers but since I've sworn off medication (for personal reasons), I've found that a good-sized dose of "stop being such a little bitch you'll be fine" actually works wonders for me

#okay it's not THAT personal #i manage my disorders with regular excercise and that works for me. FOR ME. #i've been on medication before and did naht like it #the side effects made my life sooo much work #ive been on like 6 (give or take) meds for anxiety/depression and had the greatest QOL improvements from: #1. no meds 2. environment change (that was the big one) 3. regular exercise #oops i meant 'worse' side effects made my life worse #but yeah like i know yoire supposed to be like 'okay i recognize this emotion and since it is not serving me i am disregarding it' #but with this particular kind of anxiety and need to give it absolutely NO quarter #no it's NOT valid yes i AM being kind of stupid. chill the fuck out.

[basaltbutch]

I SWEAR TO GOD THE FIRST THING IM BUYING WITH MY FIRST PAYCHECK IS SOME ACTUAL FUCKING FOOD

#it speaks #I KSJDJDKSJXKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #i LOVE how my parents have an eating disorder and refuse to get anything that isn't low-calorie low-carb #HELLO IM. I DO PHYSICAL LABOR. BOTH FOR FUN AND FOR WORK #this is why im so tired all the time i stg #feels like an uphill battle to get enough food in me. #fuck it tomorrow after work i am buying a shitton of soup cans & snacks & ready-made meals. #anyway i tried to do a food-calculator journal and stopped after a few weeks bc i was consistently getting #~500 - 700 calories #and it really freaked me out so i just. i had to close my eyes until i could do something about it #thats 500-700 a day btw. like a quarter of what's recommended

[neurosky]

remembering the beginning of 10th grade when someone in my class was faking tourette's (confirmed, they told me), and thought my tics were so cool and fun the whole time.

#they faked other things that were also confirmed fake too #also they were the only one in all of my classes that actually talked to me #so it was really hard to distance myself #because if i did i'd be alone #'twas a fun time #luckily i changed schools like a quarter of the way into the school year #tourettes #tics #tourette syndrome #tic disorder #neurodivergent

[robocops-a-christ-allegory]

Discovered there is a subreddit for “people raised by parents with BPD” that does not allow people who have BPD or seemingly even a personality disorder in general to comment. Lol.

#I Hope Everyone Dies #sorry I’m stuck between finding this hilarious and screaming into my hands #it’s so funny like ok if it’s supposedly here for people raised by abusive parents with BPD #Like. a lot of personality disorders are excaberated or even sometimes Caused by abuse #LIKE BPD. BPD IS CAUSED BY ABUSE LOL. #I might have it and my dad might have it too #I know self diagnosis is shaky but let’s be real at least a quarter of the people in that subreddit are #probably also arm chair diagnosing their parents #I found this out because I saw someone get their comment removed for saying they have BPD while answering a question about BPD #Lol. lmao.

[quarterdisorder]

#super mario bros movie #super mario bros #super mario movie #mario #nintendo #illumination #movies #gaming #video games #super mario #mario bros #quarter disorder

[quarterdollar]

LUUFFYYY 😭💕

#CLINICAL BEST BOY DISORDER #quarter watches one piece

[camotherogue]

new stress response unlocked i guess, cant eat when im at home anymore??? thats SO cool (sarcasm)

#ive barely eaten the last few days like. when ive been home i cant hardly stand to eat a quarter what i usually do #disordered eating cw #i know WHY im stressed i just. cant do nothing abou tit lol #haha my typo says tit #vent

[melathinn]

I know I didn’t actually lose 4lbs overnight bc the nature of weighing yourself everyday is that it probably wasn’t all there in the first place, but the scale says I did so it’s a big win 💪🏾

#ed but not sheeran #tw disordered eating #y’all #not eating solid food is my favorite way to be on track #it does make solid food a big scary thing tho #bc it will feel hella weird when I eat it again #I had a quarter of a strawberry and it felt like it was squeaking against my teeth

[winterblueandotherhues]

Series 1--CH 1. An introduction

Jan. 14, 2023

This is my first entry. I've been thinking for a while that I would like to put my thoughts out into the universe and see what it says back. I hope that whoever comes across these entries will feel some sort of comfort knowing someone else is going through the same things...and if no one else is going through this...well then truly good for them hahaha. Right now, I am going through a very big shift in life plans, and it feels like the worst timing because it's winter. And I can never feel motivated in winter. I blame it on the lack of blue skies and direct UV rays.

---

It's been twenty-three days since my 25th birthday, and although this is not my first quarter life crisis, 25 has me feeling like a mouse stuck in a trap...I have to find way to free myself from the things that are hold me back/holding me down. This is the year where I have to find a way to actually make myself proud.

Somehow I always find myself in this predicament as winter rolls around. I tried to start on resolutions in October but like most "new year" resolutions, they fell through. And it's pretty obvious why--there was no real plan. I like to feel like I know how to plan, but I've always been bad at it. It's probably because of the ADHD, but I feel like that's not really an excuse. This is the year for no excuses. I have to make a decision, and I have to see it through. And if it's the wrong decision, then I adjust accordingly.

Currently, I am back home after living/working in the city for the last seven years. After graduating from college at the beginning of the pandemic, I've been struggling with applying for PA grad school. I just never feel good enough. I also blame my lack of accomplishments on my anxiety which kept me from taking so many opportunities in undergrad.

And then my mom died right when I thought I was going to get my life together, and then my life really fell apart because I was looking forward to making her proud. I mean...I still think she would feel proud of me now...but I really wanted to pull myself together for her, and it felt like the rug was pulled from under my feet and I couldn't remember how to get up.

Although I surrounded myself with my friends while I was living in the city, watching my friends finish graduate school and becoming doctors was a huge wake-up call. I was wallowing in my depression and my anxiety held me back more than ever while everyone around me was going on with their lives. I felt left behind. It was like I was stuck watching a movie of everyone laughing, growing, celebrating, and all I wanted was to be a part of that movie. And I came to the realization that no one will ever stop their lives to help me live mine...that's just a selfish thing to ask of anyone...and I knew that..

So here I am, back home, trying to piece myself back together because the only person who can truly do it is me. I quit my patient care job, and I have no job right now. I am taking a biochemistry class, and it starts next week. I am scared shitless haha. It's been so long since I've learned something. I'm afraid to learn that I'm not as smart as I once was...if I even ever was...I'm terrified of failure. It feels like I've done nothing but disappoint myself for the majority of my twenties. But I know that I can't let myself be held back any longer by self-doubt and self-pity.

#journal #resolution #resolve #seasonal affective disorder #winter blues #quarter life crisis #itsgoingtogetbetter #itsonlythebeginning #patience #self growth #settingintentions #gap year #post grad life

[cosmo-spams]

why do I feel so guilty man

#(sorry I’m venting again this is just a general thing I’m fine realistically! #)* #my brain just is on a loop of appologzing? #to who? I don’t know #just keep doing so #I just want to apologize to everyone who knows me #why? who knows! #I just #I feel guilty for existing and idk how to process the possibility of having another disorder #cuz that just means that i won’t heal from this fully- #I won’t get better. this is just how I am and I have to try to deal with it but like #what does that even look like? I don’t even know if I have this #but it seems to fit too well #I hate this #plus ik no one besides ry would believe I have this cuz I’m good at masking #(even he doesn’t know more than a quarter of this- not that I lie I just hate bringing up when I’m upset cuz it always passes) #(which is like. yeah no that’s a symptom)