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epiphany-of-a-madwoman · 2 years

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The Other Woman | Steve Rogers

▹ Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader | Implied potential Bucky x Reader

▹ Genre: Angst

▹ Words: ~3.4k

▹ Summary: Steve had told you Peggy was his past, yet when time travel becomes an option, it turns out you were the other woman all along.

▹ Notes: I just like to be sad I guess. I have also decided to open my requests! I think I need some new inspiration while I work on some other pieces :)

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ

You were trapped, stuck in a fantasy you'd created on how things were supposed to be. Time seemed to drag on. It could've been an eternity or just a minute that passed, you wouldn’t have known the difference.

You stared out the window, mesmerized by the water as it washed away any remnants of the past five years. The meteorologists were predicting this storm would be one of the worst of this year. It was poetic, almost like the flood in Noah's Arc, if you believed in that sort of thing. Droplets clung to your window and obscured your vision making everything outside blurry and unimportant. Incense hung thickly in the air, the smell of smoke from the match you struck burning your nostrils. A lukewarm cup of hot chocolate rested on your side table, relatively untouched. You’d lost the appetite for it shortly after making it. It had been a force of habit, an old routine you hadn’t quite shaken.

Four months, and all you had to show for it was sleepless nights, tear stained cheeks and bloodshot eyes. You still couldn't find it in yourself to begin the process of moving on. To pack away the photos that littered your home. To get rid of him.

You half expected your front door to swing open. For him to burst in with his winning smile and bright eyes. He’d grab you in his arms and hold you tightly, thankful that the both of you had made it out alive. Two rounds with Thanos and neither of you died. Everything would be fairytale perfect: the world was safe, you weren't fugitives anymore, and Steve finally had Bucky back. That's how it should've been.

But he didn’t.

Steve never came back. Those fantasies and dreams were dashed and divided, like glass shattering on the hard floor. Millions of shards created thousands of open wounds.

He didn’t die a heroic death, sacrificing himself as Nat and Tony had. He chose to leave you. To stay in the past, a world he assured you he long ago made peace with losing. Swore to you that Peggy was nothing more than a fond memory he cherished like his old war buddies.

‘She’s nothing compared to my girl.’ he’d always say. The words that used to quell your deepest fears and insecurities now felt hollow. You were always the other woman. It just took you four years to discover that. All the years you’d wasted, the opportunities you’d passed up when you'd gone on the run for him. It had all been pointless.

He never even said goodbye. Steve couldn’t even bring himself to look you in the eyes as he broke your heart. You had to learn the truth from Bucky, a man you only knew by association. Sam had been there too, hand on your shoulders, holding you up as your whole world crumbled. You were barely coming to terms with the fact that Nat was gone, and now you’d have to live in a world without either of them.

Figures formed in the haze of the low fog the rain had brought. It brought buried memories to the forefront of your mind. Tears clouded your vision, making everything out of focus. A single tear fell, your first meeting with Steve playing behind your eyes like a movie.

----

“So it’s true then, Captain America is defrosted and ready for action.” Your voice was soft, a bite of snark hidden deep under the sweetness of it. You crept up behind the super soldier, but he’d known you were there. You weren’t a trained assassin, nor did you ever claim to be. Just someone good with a gun and even better at executing orders, even if not in the manner originally intended.

Steve turned, a polite smile on his face. He seemed confused and disoriented, like an old man trying to keep up with technology. An accurate description of Steve Rogers. The sun shone in his eyes, making them shine like light against blue waters. He was attractive, obnoxiously so. With perfectly tousled blonde hair, a strong jaw, and lips that looked too soft to not want to kiss.

“Ready and willing to jump back into action when I’m needed,” he said, holding a hand out for you to shake as you closed the distance separating you. He was even taller up close, nearly a foot taller than you. Which was new, you weren’t exactly short. “But please, call me Steve.”

You took his hand in yours, enjoying the sensation of his calloused and much larger hands in yours. All too quickly the handshake ended and he was retracting his touch.

“Y/N.” It was all you said, allowing yourself to stare into his blue eyes for one last moment before steeling yourself to distractions. This was a mission, not meet your local fossil at the Smithsonian. But that train of thought was harder to hold onto every time his arm gently brushed against yours.

“There’s quite the buzz around here, You’re all anyone can talk about,” you said, glancing at him out of the corner of your eye, mindful to keep your gaze professional.

“I didn’t think I’d be that exciting of a topic,” he said, an easy smile on his face as he looked around the helicarrier.

“Please, America’s hero melted and returned to modern America is cause for talk. Coulson swooned so hard he nearly fell to the floor,” you said, a whisper of a laugh at the edge of your words. Steve paused, turning to face you and you mirrored the action. You could feel the warmth radiating from his body, he was much closer than he had been a minute or so ago.

“And you, Agent Y/N?” he asked, a slight red hue dusting his cheeks. The grin on your face widened, eyes softening as you allowed yourself to get lost in his eyes one more time. “How do you feel?”

“Very happy to have you with us today, Captain.”

The grin on his face turned softer as the flush on his face got brighter. At that moment you noticed small flecks of green in his eyes.

“You always were my favorite part about learning about WWII in school.”

With a single pat on his shoulder, you continued making your way to the meeting room Fury and the others would be waiting in.

---

Christmas lights glistened in the large room, chatter and laughter in every corner. The room was grand, ostentatiously so. With vaulted ceilings, marble floors, and pretentious art that only had value because a bunch of rich people decided it did. Women in beautiful dresses of various dark shades were lit up with glittering jewels while men wore extravagant suits that were probably more expensive than your rent. The holiday gala had been in full swing for two hours now. The alcohol had made everyone's eyes glossy and lips loose.

You hung close to the bar, swirling the straw your drink had been served with. Your free hand rested on the bartop, manicured nails tapping against the wood. You were never good in events like this, all the glitz, glamor, and underhanded words. You were awkward and unsure of yourself outside of the battlefield. Fancy galas and parties exasperated that clumsy attitude. So you preferred to stick to the bar, hoping to get through the night with as little interaction as possible.

“What’s a pretty gal like yourself doing all by herself?” the voice of Steve Rogers said, interrupting your awkward fidgeting. You turned, a pleasant smile overtaking your frown. Steve was standing right behind you, dressed in a simple black suit. In comparison to everyone around him, the outfit was plain, but Steve made it look anything but that. He made everything he wore look breathtaking. It was infuriating.

“Just waiting for a fella to come sweep me off my feet,” you said, a coy grin pulling on your lips. One of your hands smoothed down your knee-length black dress. Steve’s smile broadened and he held out a single hand.

“Then how about a dance?”

You didn’t answer him, simply taking his hand in yours. He pulled you towards the center of the room, the sound of your heels matching the pace of your heart. People parted for the two of you like the Red Sea, all the attention on you and Steve. Anxiety began to rise in your stomach, nearly causing your throat to close up. But you glanced up, meeting Steve’s blue eyes that were as deep and vast as the ocean. In the most cliche way, everyone in the room became formless blurs. All that mattered was Steve and his hands that circled your waist, pulling you closer to him than probably necessary. You relished the proximity though, his heartbeat matching pace with yours, his warmth heating your chilled skin.

Your hands wrapped around his neck, the tips of your nails gently grazing his skin. Slowly, the two of you began to sway with the gentle piano that filled the room. The both of you wore matching smiles that were brighter than any lights in the room. Steve raised his hand, coaxing you to spin. The wind caused your hair to fan out, creating a halo effect as you did. The spin was more clumsy than you would’ve wanted, causing a shy giggle to leave your lips.

“I’m not very good at this,” you muttered a dusting of red on your cheeks. Steve’s grip tightened slightly, amplifying the butterflies that had been exploding in your stomach since he first approached you.

“It’s okay, neither am I,” Steve said. His smile quelled the insecurities that lingered in the back of your mind. In and out, you took a steady breath.

“You seem to be hiding it better than I am,” you said in a slightly sardonic tone, your nose scrunching for a moment. Steve shook his head, a whisper of laughter leaving his mouth. The soft sound sent your heart racing and caused your mind to turn white.

“Trust me, I’m not. See.” Steve unwrapped one of his arms from your waist, holding it out to you. You grabbed it, feeling his hand shaking. “You’ve got me seeing stars, doll.”

You’re silent for a moment, a dumb smile stuck on your face as you looked at Steve with adoration in your widened eyes. You grasped at straws, trying to think of something clever to say. But there was just static. You’d secretly been hoping for your friendship with Steve to blossom into more, and now it seemed you were getting your wish. You wanted to pinch yourself if only to see this was a dream.

Steve didn’t talk, content to watch you struggle with breathing properly. His smile was lazy, head tilted slightly to the left like a cute puppy. His eyes were filled with adoration that was directed at you. Something you’d wanted from the moment he first spoke.

“How long have you been holding onto that one, Cap?” you finally uttered after a few seconds of long silence.

“The moment we met, back on the helicarrier. Just been working up the courage to let ya know,” he said, his cheeks as equally as rosy as yours.

“Well--” you lifted Steve’s hand, spinning once again. This one was much smoother than the previous, Steve’s confession giving you a burst of confidence. “If it took nearly a year for you to tell me that, how long until you ask me out?”

After you spun, Steve's hand wrapped around your waist, both hands holding you close. You reveled in the feeling of being trapped in his arms, chest to chest and eye to eye.

“I’m free this Friday. We could go out to dinner, maybe go dancing after if you’re up for it,” Steve said.

“Oh I’m up for it Rogers,” you said, resting your head on his chest, inhaling the scent of his cologne. He leaned his head down, pressing a kiss on your forehead. It was gentle and over quicker than you would’ve liked, but you closed your eyes, imprinting the moment in your brain.

---

Something was wrong, you could feel it. There wasn’t anything tangible that set the paranoia off, no action or word was spoken that would stoke your fear. You shouldn't feel this way, but the pit in your stomach wouldn’t go away.

You brushed it off, the death of Nat and Tony had shaken you, especially with them being so close together. That had to be why there was a lump in your throat that wouldn’t go away. It had to be why you were imagining that Steve hadn’t been able to look you in the eyes for two weeks now. Or why he would brush you off when you’d try to grab his hand or hold onto him for comfort. None of those things were happening, you were just imagining them.

But even as you were thinking it, you knew it was pure delusion. You could read the writing on the wall.

Steve had been off the moment he returned from retrieving the stone. You’d been so wrapped up in losing Nat, that you never lingered on the implications that could have for the future of your relationship. There had been some complications and Steve and Tony had to go farther back to get the Tesseract. If you’d had a clearer mind, you would’ve understood the distant look in Steve’s eyes.

He’d seen her, Peggy. That sighting was all it took to give him doubts. You never confronted him, of course, too cowardly to face that your relationship was crumbling. You loved Steve, you'd stuck by his side for four years, enduring the worst so you could keep him. The thought that it would've all been for nothing was terrifying. So instead you tucked yourself into bed every night, promising you’d bring it up the next day, only for the cycle to repeat.

Most days you awoke hoping this had all been a terrible nightmare, but that never happened.

‘Just one last thing, and then everything can go back to normal,’ you told yourself. Steve, Sam, Bucky, and Bruce were all outside, a little ways away from the small home Pepper had. Steve was going to return the stones, and then this whole thing with Thanos would finally be put to rest.

You were at the sink, handwashing the same five dishes. It was therapeutic to have something to focus on. It kept your mind off of thoughts that you’d done your hardest to shove into the darkest recesses of your mind. Tears pricked at your eyes and your grip on the ceramic cup tightened. You clenched your jaw, inhaling then sharply exhaling.

‘Don’t cry, not here.’

Morgan and Pepper were somewhere nearby, their voices filtering into the kitchen from somewhere deeper in the house. You wouldn’t want either of them to walk in on you having a breakdown. Because if so, then you’d have to explain why you were sobbing in the middle of the kitchen. It would legitimize your fears, making the inevitable end of your relationship real.

By chance you glanced up, seeing Sam and Bucky standing with each other, but no Steve. Their backs were to you as they looked at something you couldn't quite see. A moment later Sam walked forward, slowly and almost unsure.

A glint of metal in the light caught your eye, causing you to drop the glass in your hand. The shield. Steve’s shield. You could make out the bold, red, white, and blue coloring with the large star in the center. Even from this distance, it stuck out like a sore thumb.

'No, no, no, no--'

Panic surged through your body, the lump in your throat getting worse. You could hardly breathe as you forced the door open, rushing outside. The cold air hit your face, making your hair whip around. Clumsily you ran down the steps of the porch, bare feet touching green grass.

Closer now you could see an old man. Sam and Bucky were with him, helping him get into a car. The air was knocked out of your lungs and you nearly fell over. Tears broke through the damn you’d created, staining your cheeks red and splotchy. You inhaled sharply, gasping for air.

The old man was Steve. You stood there like a fish gasping for air as you realized the man you’d loved had abandoned you without so much as a word. It was only after the car was out of sight that your mind fully processed what had happened.

Bucky and Sam turned, seeing you standing there completely still, the only noise you could make was a choked sob.

'He left. He just--'

---

You opened your eyes, grabbed the mug of cold hot chocolate, and walked towards the sink. The drink poured out of the cup and down the drain, washed away with warm water. In complete silence, you stood there with your head in your hands. The breath you’d been holding left your mouth, slowly. A few stray tears lingered, and you scrubbed your face, trying to destroy the evidence of your crying.

A knock on your front door chased away the silence. It was startling, pulling you out of your melancholic state. You straightened your back, hands smoothing your clothes and hair as you walked to the door.

In and out.

You let out one last breath before opening the door.

Bucky Barnes stood on the other side, his previously long hair cut short, more like the style he wore back in the 40s. He was dressed in simple jeans and a t-shirt. His metal arm poked out from the sleeve of his leather jacket causing it to gleam in the dim lighting. A large grin lit up his face, making his ever-tired blue eyes brighter than usual. He held a grocery bag in his dominant hand and leaned nonchalantly against your doorway.

“I thought we’d try our hand at making something for once instead of ordering out,” he said. A tentative smile blossomed on your face, stepping aside for Bucky to freely enter the apartment. He’d started coming by two weeks after Steve left, mumbling something about not wanting you to have to be alone. Though you both knew he needed the company as much as you.

“Oh, you might regret that Barnes. I don’t think either of us has the natural talent to cook,” you said, following him into the kitchen. He took off his jacket, setting it on the back of one of your chairs.

“I’ll have you know I make a mean batch of pancakes,” he said as he pulled grocery items out of the bag.

“That doesn't mean shit. Everyone knows that waffles are superior,” you smugly said. Bucky rolled his eyes, shaking his head as his lips pressed into a thin line.

“What? Not even close, waffles are so hard and difficult to chew, pancakes are so soft and fluffy,” he said.

“Waffles are fluffy too!”

“Not like pancakes!” Bucky fired right back.

“Besides, waffles are not hard, you just always burn them,” you said.

“That was one time!”

The two of you continued to playfully banter, poking and prodding each other with quips as you cooked in your tiny kitchen. It was a relief to not have your thoughts constantly wander to Steve every five seconds. At some point he melted away completely, leaving only you and Bucky in the candlelight glow of your apartment. At some point, he'd become your rock, the one thing keeping you from going completely adrift. The time spent with Bucky was an escape, a chance for you to pretend you hadn't been completely shattered.

You smiled at a stupid joke he'd made, a sarcastic quip snapped at him like a whip. You both sat on your couch, eating the food that had taken far longer than necessary to make. But you weren't mad, in fact, you hoped the raging storm outside would be enough excuse for him to stay the night. If only to avoid the feeling of drowning that always followed Bucky's absence.

Yet you couldn't ignore the flutter of your heart or the lightheaded feeling whenever Bucky laughed. You didn't acknowledge it, simply relishing in the moments spent together. The hole Steve had left behind slowly filled each day Bucky smiled at you like that.

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haggishlyhagging · 8 months

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“In the Chinese myth of the great flood, the Moon Goddess sent her representative to earth, after the waters had subsided, to repeople the world. In the Babylonian account, Ishtar, the Moon Goddess, is reported to have both caused the great flood and to have saved a remnant of her people. Here her dual character is clearly seen, for she herself sent the flood and then lamented over the havoc she had wrought. On the Eleventh Tablet of Creation is told the story of the flood. It is called "The Lamentation of Ishtar at the Great Deluge." According to this ancient record the goddess Ishtar prophesied evil which immediately came to pass. If a person endowed with magic power prophesies, according to the "magic" way of thinking, she evokes that which she has prophesied, whether it be good or evil. We are still swayed by this old attitude when we feel it to be unlucky to suggest that something may go wrong, or that there may be an accident, or other misfortune, and we can still "feel" a hint of the dread which was caused by a witch's curse. For the curse was by no means only a wish that evil might be fall, it was believed actually to bring to pass the evil that had been "wished on" the cursed one. This colloquial expression gives the nearest modern equivalent to the old concept of a witch's prophecy or curse. So Ishtar, who was a noted prophetess, as were all the moon goddesses in whom the dark side of the moon was represented, prophesied evil, thus bringing the flood upon the earth. Then when mankind and all the animals were threatened by the rising waters, she pitied their plight and saved them.

Spake Ishtar like a child uttered the great goddess her speech, “All to corruption are turned and then I in the presence of the gods prophesied and

As I prophesied in the presence of the gods evil, to evil were devoted all my people and I prophesied

I the mother have begotten my people and like the young of the fishes they fill the sea

The gods concerning the spirits were weeping with me

The gods in seats seated in lamentation covered with their lips for the coming evil

Six days and nights passed

The wind, the deluge, storm overwhelmed.

On the seventh day in its course, was calmed the storm and all the deluge

Which had destroyed like an earth quake,

Quieted.”

As the poem proceeds, Ishtar is depicted in the boat which she has made and from which, like Noah from the Ark:

“On the seventh day in the course of it I sent forth a dove and it left”

. . .

"I sent the animals forth to the four winds"

There was probably an earlier version of this myth which makes the Moon God the central figure. Noah, in the Old Testament story, is probably a form of Nuah, a Babylonian moon goddess, and like Ishtar, he saved a remnant of the world from destruction in an ark which he built. Then when the waters subsided, Noah, taught by a dove, the bird which is invariably associated with moon deities, came out onto the land. The depopulated earth was repeopled from him and his family alone. He was thus the father of all who were born subsequently. As he had taken with him in the ark one pair of each animal species he was thus the generator or creator of all animal life on the renewed or redeemed earth.

The word ark is cognate with the Hindu word argha, which means crescent, and also with the arc of a circle. The ark in which Father Noah carried the animals over the flood was thus a moon boat. This story is put into the form of history, in the Old Testament, as is so much of religious myth. Even today, controversy still centers around the problem of the factual basis for the almost generally accepted legend of a great flood. Whatever may be the truth in regard to the deluge, it is clear that the story of the moon boat refers to psychological events. In the Chaldean story the whole happening is concretized. It is living men and animals who are transported over the floods to the "New World." In the Egyptian story Osiris, the Moon God, ferried the dead man who had been initiated into his rites, over the waters to the Isle of the Blest, and so gave him immortality. This also was a concretization. It was thought of as having an actual physical reality. But the Hindus, who were more psychologically minded than either the Chaldeans or the Egyptians, speak of the moon as carrying the souls of the dead over the waters to the sun where they live a redeemed life. This transition is represented in the Tantric diagrams of the Seven Stages of Consciousness. There the crescent moon is seen in the watery region, above which comes the fiery region of the sun. But already this is realized as symbol. The psychical is no longer projected into a concrete semihistorical happening, but the myth is recognized as representing stages of consciousness or of psychological development.

The moon boat of the Hindus carries the souls to the new world, the new incarnation, it is the boat of immortality. The Chinese moon goddess after the flood gives birth to all living things. It is a renewed world and a new creation. Men, women, and all animals arise from the different parts of her person. The moon goddess of Western Asia and of Europe similarly gave birth to all living creatures. The statues of Diana and those of the Asiatic moon goddesses in their hieratic form show animals and plants springing from heads, limbs, and breasts. For the Moon Goddess is the Many Breasted Mother of All, creator of all life on the earth.

The Moon Goddess is, in literal fact, the mother of all living things and yet, strange though it may seem, not only is she the life-giver but also the destroyer. She creates all life on the earth, and then comes the flood, which overwhelms it. And this flood is her doing, for she is cause of rain and storm and tide and also of the flood. But like Ishtar of Babylon, she laments at its consequences and does her best to save her children, who have all become ‘like the fishes of the sea.’ Similarly, though she stands passively by when her son is killed, the Moon Goddess mourns, as Aphrodite did, at the defeat and death of Adonis, an event that was commemorated annually, in the festival of the ‘weeping for Adonis.’”

-M. Esther Harding, Woman’s Mysteries: Ancient and Modern

#m. Esther Harding #flood myth #moon goddess #ishtar #Noah and the ark myth

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katyspersonal · 23 days

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Okay I will shut up about it honestly, but it still makes so much sense that Aldrich started eating people? 🤔 Humanity is naturally darkness, and the Deep is darkness "beyond human ken". So, darker than dark. *cue Gaster joke* *cue 'THIS IS ADVANCED DARKNESS meme from Spongebob yeah yeah whatever*

Like, if they wanted to stand the chance to survive it, they needed to become dark themselves! It was basically building in enough of this darkness within bodies (he and his deacons I mean), since no individual person has enough of it anymore because of the thing Gwyn did. That factor also unfortunately demanded that most people just become a mass, not travelling in a twisted Noah's Arc but making it. And they needed to survive it! It is like Darkness was confined within a dam, and repeated cycles of banishing the Darkness (linking the Fire) kept filling its volume for centuries or longer. It is not like it just stopped existing! It was flooding where light would not reach it. Eventually that metaphorical dam would become full of Darkness and the water is going to pour out of it and flood everything!

Maybe it was close to happening already at DS3 time, or maybe Aldrich decided to not test it or waste the time. Making him Lord of Cinder could have been sort of betrayal and he'd rather use more time to do his thing, or maybe he agreed to it specifically to bring the inevitable close? Who knows! It is probably that Aldrich started to think about it seeing the parallel as the holy body of water from Church of the Deep became filthy the more human dregs they kept washing away from people. Or he was clairvoyant and literally envisioned it xd You know. Sea and eldrich horrors in Soulsborne.

+ You know how Orthodox priest baptise people not by pouring water over them, but by plunging them head down into a vessel with water? Maybe this is how Aldrich could show the true state of the world to those he deemed more worthy than becoming a 'mass'. (they'd usually scream in horror afterwards and never be the same again)

#dark souls #dark souls 3 #aldrich devourer of gods #I love him so much he was never actually wrong lol

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yuri-is-online · 12 days

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Hey boo uh. How many asks do you have rn? Cause I want to flood your inbox with my Jade simpery but I don't want to like. Recreate Noah's arc if your inbox is already full

Like 9? But it's more like 3 since most of them are stuff I've just been being lazy about answering I am so sorry.

#<3 asks #which is to say send me jade thirst please please please please

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rappaccini · 13 days

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.......... kingdom of the planet of the apes thoughts

noa

great new protagonist. excited to see how he evolves as a character. he's definitely The New Caesar, but his gentler personality is a welcome change.

damn somebody else CAN actually hit the andy serkis notes for playing an ape. props to this actor.

glad he isn't caesar's descendant and that his clan's totally apart from caesar's tribe. thank you for expanding the world instead of star warsing it. -- and for calling out the obsession with nostalgia via proximus.

his arc was great. questioning the state of things and wanting something better should hopefully spell good things for the development of the ape society in the reboots. more on that in a sec.

that or he's about to have one hell of a disillusionment arc.

these movies keep coming up with clever ways to distinguish their ape characters. the bald spot, green eyes and armband being his thing are his.

his tribe and their eagle culture is fascinating. the concept of apes using abandoned skyscrapers as towers for bird husbandry comes from a history channel documentary i remember watching as a kid and i love seeing it pop up here.

even the eagle song, which could've been so cheesy, works in context.

even his name is so well thought-out. noa as in noah, who guides people through a flood; which noa does at the climax. and noa as in 'no', the first word an ape spoke out loud in the first trilogy, which is paralleled when mae shouts his name- the first word a human speaks in the second trilogy.

.... anaya and soona were certainly there.

the soona romance felt out of nowhere. like oh ok so the one girl in the friend group is the future gf. we're doing that. fine.

and all that just so her designated bf can emotionally cheat on her with a human for two more movies. girl. get out of there now.

yes i think noa and mae had chemistry. pota is a franchise that simply does interspecies romance. a lot. you just have to roll with it if you're gonna be here.

i was wondering when that would make it to the movies again, and it seems like they're trying to see how much they can get away with.

like it's 100% intentional that they have young adults who aren't married and have no kids as the pro and deuteragonist in this trilogy. they know about the chemistry. they animated him checking her out like that on purpose. they made them co-leads for a reason. they did a parallel to the "NO" scene in rise with mae calling noa's name. they gave mae a beat of jealousy when she learned about him and soona. he's catching her on horseback and giving her a token of clothing from his clan. he's unable to choose between his childhood sweetheart and the girl he's been traveling with for weeks. there's a layer of innuendo in the climb to access the military silo that had me cackling.

they know what they're doing.

it's probably not gonna be a literal ship, more like a symbolic one. i don't want them to kiss or fuck or say i love you i want them to stare at each other, obsess over each other, debate the nature of humanity and sentience, touch foreheads, save each other, try to kill each other and die in each other's arms. they're gonna make their symbolic breakup everybody's problem.

general worldbuilding thoughts

maybe it's just that i've been getting back into fantasy but there's a very... familiar vibe to the rhythms of the story. a noble prince, a fat goofy monk and a belle dam sans merci setting off to fight an evil king. but it's apes!

damn we're really so desperate for gay rep that we're taking raka saying "he was my village" about a guy he was close to and running with it huh

(👀 at noa and mae encountering another unconventional couple. it just keeps stacking up.)

okay. then we have to talk about how the only possibly queer character is the guy who can't even admit that he's gay even though none of the characters should have a problem with it, who drowns halfway through the movie. and is played by the only person of color in the main cast. oh so i guess these apes aren't that different huh.

no this is such a gripe i have with pota reboot worldbuilding. the apes are starting a new civilization... and building it like humans. everyone's straight, even though bonobos are famously up for anything and even chimps, orangutans and gorillas have been known to get gay. apparently monogomous mates are a thing even though apes don't do that. all power is held by male characters, even though bonobos are matriarchal, orangutans wouldn't give a shit either way and female chimps may not lead their troops but they sure as shit don't hide at home with the babies. yeah okay ~they don't have to behave like their species~ but... isn't that a missed opportunity? if you're going to build a new society based on a species of animal, wouldn't it be more interesting to build it around how those animals behave? or at least do something different than the same system we have?

at least this reboot doesn't fridge any of the female characters. was sure noa's mom and soona were toast. still think they won't make it to the end of this trilogy but they got through part 1.

.... so are gibbons evolved too. i think raka mentioned gibbons. wtf would that be like. skinny little dudes with big voices. can we meet some.

mae

a great deuteragonist. another gripe i had about the caesar trilogy was how male-centric it was. no seriously i was sitting in the theater ten years ago watching dawn, thinking, those humans could've sent a team of women up to restart the dam and this whole mess could've been different because koba's specifically triggered by the presence of men. because men were the people abusing him. (and because bonobos follow the females in the group)

not a coincidence that when the apes adopt a human into their tribe, it's a little girl.

so kotpota having a female deuteragonist was very needed and even something as small as noa's mom being a leader figure was too. the bar's in hell. don't love soona being The Designated Girlfriend, and mae only interacting with guys though. please let her interact with women.

seeing kingdom actually use that angle, of apes being calmer and more accepting of women than men, and having mae exploit that with those puppy eyes? oh that was smart. even if they didn't realize they were writing it that way i'll take it.

another smart detail: the bunker being in the plains. humans were grassland apes. makes sense that would be where they'd continue to exist, and where the other species would avoid.

adding onto that: humans are good swimmers compared to other primates. wish more was done with that given how much of the story revolves around being near water. i'm just saying i wish we got a scene where mae casually swims across the river while raka and noa are like. trying to inch their way over a fallen tree or something. different apes are good at different things. let's see more of that.

anyway love the mae twist. love that she isn't an astronaut-- but is setting in motion events that will lead to their return. and that there are pockets of intelligent humans out there.

extremely funny that she keeps accumulating dirt and has the rattiest side braid. this girl simply does not bathe.

i am staring hard at the implications behind mae always wearing eagle clan blue after she accepts noa's mom's blanket. it's the blanket, then the shirt, then the poncho. hm.

i'm wondering if there are in fact cultures where humans and apes are living together peacefully. or if this is the story of how one is created.

regardless it looks like the conflict's going to shape up to be humans trying to reclaim earth and apes fighting to maintain their new lead. cool.

still annoying that even in the apocalypse women have tweezed eyebrows and hairless armpits. okay.

i'm so curious about mae. how much of her backstory was true and how much was a lie. her group being massacred was clearly true, but her mother being dead may not be. she's clearly isolated from the bunker civilization given that she isn't allowed inside, so is she just... alone. unable to go home again. do they think she's contaminated. is she going to be stuck outside alone in a hostile world for years until the next movie comes out. what's going on there.

anyway the foiling of her and noa is great. smart but naive rule-following son of the chief who's never had a hard day in his life, vs bitter manipulative grimy girl who grew up in constant fear. that's juicy. he can fix her! she can make him worse!

she's clearly not evil. she's just been through some shit. you can see the wheels turning in her head as she realizes raka and noa are genuinely kind, and where her fears about apes are coming from when she literally watches them hunt other humans for sport, had her group murdered by them last week and just narrowly escaped being killed by them. her paranoia and bitterness is actually justified. when she lies to noa, it's because she has good reason to fear him and her distrust of him is well-founded. when she blows up the dam to destroy the weapons inside the vault, it was the right move because proximus absolutely would have used them to enslave more apes. and when she conceals that she has the gun, i don't blame her. (also worth noting that she takes the smallest one in the locker and leaves the rest)

... love that she's the one who made the choice for noa about ~which girl will you choose to kill~. nah bitch. she's choosing YOU.

and she WAS honest to noa about what she wanted from the bunker. dude's not gonna get what a hard drive is, so "book that lets us speak" WAS accurate.

(... very clever of the movie to have noa and co pick up a book of abcs, aka, a book that teaches you how to translate letters into sounds, and see images of apes in cages. the misunderstanding makes sense: he thinks she was here for that. and symbolically, she kind of is.)

the mission she's on IS that serious. fuck yeah getting the satellites working so we can speak to other survivors is worth taking all those risks.

.... and fuck yeah it's gonna lead to some conflict. gonna be interesting to see what mae does when that breaks out.

if she's getting a redemption arc, i love it. if she's about to turn into a tragic villain, i love it.

she's the koba of this trilogy.

(... and since koba was gay as hell for caesar. you know that that means.)

proximus

great villain. great personality. great example of the apes getting in on serfdom and organized religion. he's got an immortan joe flavoring that's exciting.

i know i'm the only person who gives a shit about this but noa should absolutely have been a bonobo and proximus should've been a chimp. putting aside that we're really doing that Good Chimp Evil Bonobo shit again... the softboy from a pacifistic clan being a bonobo just makes more sense because bonobos are the peaceful apes. like yeah ~they don't have to be exactly like the species they're based on~ but when are we gonna get a good bonobo depiction. why is every bonobo an evil wannabe dictator.

and the violent caesar wannabe being a literal chimp and using that heritage to try to claim an inherent connection to the ape messiah feels like a missed opportunity.

especially when you consider that the bronze age apes are already starting to take after humans in their social structure: the apes, all on their own, just invented organized religion, monks, animal husbandry, kingdoms, patriarchy and raiding parties that capture and forcibly convert other tribes to make them into slave labor.

... odds are speciesism is next. it's already there with the humans. how long's it gonna take before they start insisting that certain apes can only serve certain roles in society. we already have it as a given that the chimp Must Be The Protagonist and the bonobo Must Be The Antagonist, that the always-male gorilla's the enforcer, and that the orangutan's always a chill smart guy. what happens if someone doesn't fit that caste system, or if the system fragments into tribes that don't mix species. probably not anything good.

... at what point are we gonna talk about how humans are apes too. it's not the 60s anymore, let's go into that.

or how we really needed to expand the 'proximus wants to be like humans and that's why he's bad' theme to 'any ape that becomes as evolved socially as humans will end up emulating human civilization in all its best and worst ways because humanity isn't the problem, power is'

i hope we still get there. the reboot spent an entire trilogy building up how human apes are and how apelike humans are; let's see the lines start to blur.

anyway frank gallagher being his human advisor was fun. proximus has a real king louie vibe that's funny and eerie.

did proximus and frank gallagher explore each others bodies

of course this fucker's obsessed with the roman empire.

.... still think there's a missed opportunity. like. think about it: proximus wants to be human and is obsessed with evolution and speeding ahead through it by any means necessary. and with bringing an intelligent female human to his court alive and mostly unharmed, and keeping her in a gilded cage. and his manservant's warning said human female captive that whatever the fuck proximus wants with her, it might be worse than death.

all i'm saying is, when proximus literally pulled a 'bathe her and bring her to me' and had her eating at his table as he was breathing down her neck right in front of the guy who has a crush on her who he's trying to break the spirit of, talking about speedrunning evolution and how superior he thinks humans are, preening about how he's made himself a kingdom, sneering about how interesting it is when humans and apes pair up, and. uh. the innuendo in him saying he wants to speed up evolution by forcing his way into an enclosed chamber that's important to mae that she desperately wants to keep him away from that she insists is only for humans (... which she will let a different ape into anyway later that night by clinging to noa as he... you know. gets her there. as they're soaking wet.)

look i was waiting for him to drop the bombshell that he's looking for a human queen and has decided that he wants mae.

you know what that implies.

i wish they'd gone there. it's not even new territory for this franchise!

it would've given mae a visceral reason to snap necks and blow shit up that the audience would understand a lot easier than amorphous ~mistrust of the apes~ -- you really needed a concrete example of what mae personally is afraid of, and this was the best opportunity to give her that while disrupting as little of the story as possible. it would've taken one line of dialogue and maybe one gesture from him to pull that off.

it hammers in that proximus really does want to repeat the worst aspects of human civilization. which contrasts him to noa, a chance to do things differently. the law is wrong, and whatnot. what's the point of starting over if you're going to do it all the same.

it gives proximus another level of menace. fast way to switch the audience's perception from 'he's a dick but he's fun to watch' to 'oh yeah this guy needs to die.'

and since you're clearly playing with interspecies relationships, you gotta establish that they're going to start happening. this would've been a good opportunity to say "yes, we're going there" and show the audience what a bad one would look like, so they can recognize that the good one is different.

predictions.

... ok so beneath the planet of the apes is next, right? and then conquest to close out the middle chapter trilogy?

my wild guess is they'll focus on mae and her bunker people to contrast noa and his clan, and they'll have a female human antagonist to balance out the male bonobo. possibly dichen lachman's character.

maybe they'll drop a male human love interest in for mae to balance things out. another layer of plausible deniability. also it would be extremely funny if he and soona met and were like 'wait a damn minute'

… if they’re really doing a beauty and the beast, what if he’s the gaston figure

and to really drive the foils home, this time noa's gonna have trust issues and instigate the shady fuckup that results in the climax.

and then in the third, there'll be another war that the apes, in some form, will win. and noa and mae will either be trying to prevent it or leading their factions into a death spiral. fun either way.

they won't ever Go There with them being a couple. like no way would they have the balls to do it, and soona being the out-of-nowhere gf for noa pretty much confirms it. unless she's fridged. (man i hope she dumps him)

but their dynamic's got that vibe for a reason. i wouldn't be shocked if they ride that ambiguity through the trilogy and then have their historical interpretations in poto 7-9 be assumed to have been a couple, the same way caesar's been reinterpreted-- either the story of a human-ape relationship that made it possible for their species to live together, or a cautionary tale about Why We Do Not Mix. or springing some indication that the first human-ape hybrid came from them after the credits roll on the third movie, assuming they survive it. which i doubt.

part of me really fucking wonders if the twist for this reboot's going to be that apes and humans DO find a way to live together and noa and mae do succeed at getting their respective factions to live together. maybe it will be some romeo and juliet/uniting the tribes through symbolic marriage shit. feels like the fullest encapsulation of the do-things-differently theme they're playing with in kotpota.

or maybe they'll kill each other. which would also be fun but in a tragedy rubberneck way.

either way i'm excited. i missed these movies!

#planet of the apes

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q-starhalo · 8 months

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Welcome in fellas let me tell you why q!Bad and Crowley are so similar because I want to and because they are and you can't stop me.

[undercut ↓]

Now, we'll start at the first episode of season 2, where we see Crowley before he fell. Before the Beginning. It seems that he is tasked with making the universe where Earth is going to be planted which is a big deal honestly. How does that fit with Bad? Well, we can only guess this but with a throne with angel wings behind it and a halo like chandelier above it we can assume Bad has a higher archy angel. Not exactly an archangel but close to it (or maybe a archangel who's to say but time). Now I'm not saying Crowley was one but being tasked with the creation of the universe where Earth was going to be? Pretty big deal that I would say only a higher archy angel would have. But that information is still to be confirmed.

Now the Garden of Eden, 4004 BC. Of course Bad isn't going to meet an angel at the wall that goes around the garden and he actually arrived in 960 BC, way before 4004 BC and blah blah blah. BUT I want to point out a few lines Crowley says to Aziraphale; "I can't see what's so bad about knowing the difference between good and evil anyway" and "It'd be funny if we both got it wrong, if I did the good thing and you did the bad one". We've all mentioned how Bad chooses to be kind despite being a demon. That it's funny that he's doing good even though he's an entity that's defined as evil and dangerous. Which, yes, he is evil and dangerous but not always. The line is also supported by a good amount of actions Crowley does within the show; not killing the goats nor kids, helping Aziraphale, trying to help Maggie and Nina, etc. But he's not necessarily NICE. He only chooses to be nice from time to time. Especially with Aziraphale, someone he considers close. Just like Bad. He's only nice to those close to him and he choses to be kind to others if he wants to. He's literally known as the islands babysitter and someone you can trust. He has experienced almost everything that has happened on the island since the start.

Now let's go to Mesopotamia, 3004 BC. Noah's Arc before the flood. Crowley finds out that God had gotten angry and planned to wipe out most of the human population. Including the kids (actually one's + baby goats). Crowley, despite being an entity of evil and this being in his lots range, it's too much for even God to do. The Federation being as messed up as it is, them kidnapping their children, doing experiments on these babies, and everything else is something way out of Bad's demonic morals. He's a entity of chaos and even this is too much. For Heavens sake, even MOUSE, the Queen of Hell, finds it all too much. Too much for a demon. A war that'll end Earth. A Federation and an Island filled with horrors and chaos.

2008-ish, 11 years before the war between Heaven and Hell, the apocalypse, Crowley is assigned to deliver the antichrist. Himself. He's all for the war, but him delivering it and realizing that it's actually going to happen is another thing. Bad is all for chaos, pranks, spying, and lieing but when it comes to doing that stuff for the Federation that doesn't benefit the Island but just them, that's something else. That is something he doesn't want to do, ever. He checks every task he's given or others are given to make sure it's nothing.

And another thing. Atlantis. Bad, upon his arrival, was part of a historical event that we can confirm as the sinking of Atlantis. Killing off everyone he loved. He's haunted by it, a reason for his paranoia. Crowley was the one who had to deliver the antichrist, being the reason why Earth might've ended, a guilt throughout the years before the end times were to happen.

Now, the following will be during the week when Armageddon is to happen. The end of the world:

"I didn't mean to fall, I just hanged around the wrong people" WHEN I TELL YOU I LOVE THIS LINE. And it fits q!Bad soooooo well. "I didn't mean to fall" HE DIDN'T MEAN TO FALL. Many members have mentioned how nice Bad is, and within the story when you think about it, it shows that Bad is kind in his way. He didn't mean to be a demon. If anything, he tries to hide that fact and that he was extremely dangerous that he sunk a city once and killed everyone he ever loved. During and after the acceptance stage, Bad has given in into his messed morals and demonic nature a bit more. He had to ACCEPT his demonic nature after so long of holding that guilt of being something that killed everyone he cared for. While he still does hide the fact he's a demon, he acts more like it now. "I didn't mean to fall".

And I don't mean that q!Bad never loved having power of destruction, as if he wouldn't be gossiping with the witches during the salem witch trials knowing one of them is going to die and praying on one of their deaths. But he never destroyed, he never did anything BIG. It's only small pranks and he usually leaves a present after. He now, he's testing, he's becoming more risky, more dangerous. He didn't mean to fall but he certainly doesn't want to be an angel again if he can't have as much fun as he's having.

"But evil always contains the seeds of it's own destruction" No matter how well crafted Bad's disguise is, the seed of his destruction he made is marked on that universe. While this line isn't really directly about Crowley nor did he say it, it is directed to Hell as a whole. No matter how well made their plan for the apocalypse, for the antichrist to be delivered to the right person, to have Hell win, there's always going to be something against them. Something from their plan. And in this case, it's Bad against himself.

"I'm a demon, I'm not nice. I'm never nice, nice is a four letter word" Now, we know Bad is kind and from times admits it. But he most usually says he's hardcore, not nice. That he literally has bad in his name. However, as mentioned, the islanders see him as a nice guy despite the chaos he would sometimes cause. Crowley said the line because Aziraphale said that Crowley had some kindness deep down inside him and by God if that isn't Bad. Might've taken a bit during his first years but he's nice deep down, just more dangerous and crazy the deeper you go.

Also, 6 years before the world is supposed to end, Crowley dresses up as a Nani, and Bad's the Islands babysitter. I don't know how much more proof you need ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

Okay thanks for reading o/

#I WANTED to add more but the post felt long enough soooooo if there's more from season 1 I'll add it through a reblog #and then I'll watch season 2 and see if I can get any other comparisons :P #also as always please correct me with anything (wording - character - etc.)#this took so long but it was worth it bye o/#qsmp #badboyhalo #qsmp badboyhalo #erm yeah nah I won't tag it but this is also about Crowley from Good Omens!! :D

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kyros-tha-soldier · 1 month

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⚠️ ONE PIECE CHAPTER 1113 SPOILERS ⚠️

Spoilers aheeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaad!

You've been warned

We are SO back with another glorious set of brief spoilers until the scans drop, so I'll give you a quick spin on what's gonna happen (spoilers by @pewpiece from twitter btw)

🔥last time we saw Mars wander into the lab from where the live broadcast was ALLEGEDLY being aired and searches around for the den den mushi, he finds it but then looks up at something that's making bubbling sounds, turns out it was a big jar with vegapunk's head inside it which is... Odd? Like, didn't he die a couple of chapters ago?

🔥Mars destroys the den den mushi but it turns out it's only a decoy, the broadcast keeps on running and vegapunk resumes talking after a 10 minutes long pause.

🔥 we can see the reactions of various arc and island characters, i still don't know which ones but I'm hoping... just hoping 🥺

Oda pwease answer my plea 😔

🔥The gorosei are absolutely clueless about what kind of hot tea Vegapunk will be spilling this time so they're trying to stop the broadcast at all cost because either way he'll end up serving some SERIOUS tea. And having worked with the elites of the world, he sure does know a lot of dirty stuff.

🔥Nusjuro and Sanji encounter and Sanji attacks him.

My boy saw a centaur and said "Giddy up"

🔥 back to our silly willy goofy but formerly shady scientist, vegapunk says that if this broadcast plays then that means that he's dead (RIP) he confesses that he has done so many misdeeds and bad things which is why he decided to record a message where he wants to share something important to redeem himself

🔥Saturn arrives to Usopp's group and starts talking (I don't know exactly what he was saying) and Robin remembers his voice.

NO FUCKING WAY SATURN GETS AWAY WITH TRAUMATIZING LITERAL KIDS!

First robin and now Kuma, ginny and Bonney????

Your spider ass better be PREPARED for my making my Robin cry!

🔥 at the end, Vegapunk drops some truth bombs and says that the world is going to sink into the ocean!

(let's hope your OP favs live in an area higher than sea level like Alabasta or dressrosa or wano or in fishman island or water seven or anywhere that cant be fully submerged in the flood)

Also is it just me, or is Oda trying to bring his fans to think back on the noah arc back in fishman island because, you know, this sounds like the abrahamic/biblical/quranic retelling of the great flood?

But how will he use it is what's still a headscratcher to me but we'll figure it out soon.

On a sidenote ive seen some people theorizing that the OP world actually went through a flood before which is why islands like wano and long ring long land ended up being submerged and their geography changed.

I dunno man, i think those theories are correct. Also what caused this flood? Was it Imu? Was the world government itself? Was it because Poseidon fell in the wrong hands?

So many questions! But i hope we get to answer them soon

#one piece #One piece chapter 1113 #One piece spoilers #Monkey d Luffy #sanji vinsmoke #roronoa zoro #nami one piece #usopp #tony tony chopper #franky #brook #nico robin #jay garcia saturn #Saturn is so fucking unhinged holy shit #Imagine if the people got shocked from the news and Vegapunk is like “bro just learn how to swim lol”

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warrioreowynofrohan · 5 months

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Getting back to Marmion! Some bits of context for the last few days’ posts.

A palmer was sort of a continual pilgrim, who spent a period of time travelling to holy sights and praying. The greatest holy sight of all was Jerusalem, where the palmer in the poem has in fact been, along with a huge list of other holy sights, from Mt. Ararat where Noah’s Arc reputedly came to rest after the Flood, to Mt. Sinai, to Santiago de Compostela in Spain, and in England Durham and Canterbury among others.

I think (I am not sure) palmer paid for their travels in part by donations from pious people, who might want the palmer to pray for them at some shrine. Marmion himself expresses a more lighthearted picture of palmers in general -

I love such holy ramblers; still

They know to charm a weary hill,

With song, romance, or lay:

Some jovial tale, or glee, or jest,

Some lying legend, at the least,

They bring to cheer the way.”

- and that may not be unrealistic for a category of people that could have included the medieval equivalent of a tourist with a GoFundMe. But this palmer is not of that kind - he’s haggard and gloomy, and kind of disturbing with his nighttime mutterings. But Marmion chooses to accept him as a guide all the same, and the next morning the whole group departs.

The first canto (The Castle) ended, we switch scenes and characters for the second (The Convent), to a boat travelling north, up the eastern coast of England, from Whitby to the island of Lindisfarne (also called St. Cuthbert’s Isle) with a group of nuns aboard. Now, where has Lindisfarne been mentioned in the previous canto? In the bit about Marmion’s former page:

That boy thou thought’st so goodly fair,

He might not brook the Northern air.

More of his fate if thou wouldst learn,

I left him sick in Lindisfarne:

The voyage is both a little scary and exciting for the nuns, who don’t get out much. Many of the castles the pass, like Warkworth and Dunstanburgh and Bamburgh, are ones you can still see on the Northumberland coast today.

But two of the group in particular are not having fun: the abbess (chief nun), who is not named, and the novice (i.e., has not yet taken vows and become a nun) Clare. Clare joined the convent recently after the loss of the man she loved, and in order to escape an unwelcome suitor who is trying to marry her in order to get at her property.

She was betrothed to one now dead,

Or worse, who had dishonoured fled.

Her kinsmen bade her give her hand

To one who loved her for her land;

Herself, almost heart-broken now,

Was bent to take the vestal vow,

And shroud, within Saint Hilda’s gloom,

Her blasted hopes and withered bloom.

On top of these griefs, there’s been an attempt to murder her, and the people who attempted it are now prisoners in Lindisfarne awaiting trial:

And jealousy, by dark intrigue,

With sordid avarice in league,

Had practised with their bowl and knife

Against the mourner’s harmless life.

This crime was charged ’gainst those who lay

Prisoned in Cuthbert’s islet grey.

Moving back a bit to yesterday’s entry, this is why the abbess of Whitby is going on this journey: to sit in judgement on these attempted murderers.

Sad was this voyage to the dame;

Summoned to Lindisfarne, she came,

There, with Saint Cuthbert’s Abbot old,

And Tynemouth’s Prioress, to hold

A chapter of Saint Benedict,

For inquisition stern and strict,

On two apostates from the faith,

And, if need were, to doom to death.

Lindisfarne is a tidal island: at low tide it is a peninsula that can be reached from the mainland across mudflats, but at high tide it is an island.

The tide did now its floodmark gain,

And girdled in the saint’s domain:

For, with the flow and ebb, its style

Varies from continent to isle;

As the ship reaches Lindisfarne, the nuns of Whitby on the ship sing a hymn, and the nons and monks of Lindisfarne sing one in return.

#marmion #lindisfarne

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salty-protagonist · 10 months

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Determining Star Lords with Astrology (Part 2)

This post references back to Part 1 and includes the analysis for Polaris and Canopus.

Polaris ****

Polaris is the most common blood type in the series. But what makes it special is the fact that we actually met Lord Polaris (with his identity concealed)!

I assume that Lord Polaris is male because he is/was a butler and it is traditionally a masculine role.

Polaris is the “Pole Star” that moves around very slightly compared to the average star movement has has been used as a guide to determine the direction of north over many centuries. It’s part of the Ursa Minor (Little Bear) constellation.

Polaris is known for being a trusty guidepost that leads people with a purpose. These qualities are shared with his identities as butler.

The second thing we know about Lord Polaris is that he is dead. When did he die? Was he always dead? Well, according to the fan translation I’m putting here, he was alive until very recently. (If anyone has the official copies, it would be great if you’d share your wisdom because the English translations are not sold in my region and I have no means to look for one at the moment)

Blue stars are the hottest stars (simply due to the electron jumps in their atomic levels). Here, I’m guessing it’s either to talk about Lord Sirius because he is more powerful compared to the other Lords, or to talk about Lord Sirius because it is associated with the Phantomhives who’s trademark colour is blue. (Ciel means sky in French as you all know, which is blue). A third possibility would be to talk about Lord Sirius, since it’s a white-blue star (sourced from the internet).

I would like to elaborate more on this but I will do so regarding chapter 169 in the future when Polaris becomes relevant again. I was busy at the time 169 came out so I couldn’t directly comment on it at the time.

Moving on, the reason why I mentioned the official translation is because how I understand the panel above is as he wasn’t dead at the time. So I want to make sure the meaning is as close to that as possible. Nevertheless, something has happened between RC reveal and ch169 for Polaris to have died. Perhaps when RC stopped being Lord Sirius, it also meant the fall of the Blue Star that led Polaris to sacrifice himself in a cultish way? Or RC needed an organ and Undertaker took it from Polaris?

Still, I don’t think we can create solid connections between any butler character we already know and Lord Polaris. Many new characters were introduced during the last few years so it would be safe to assume he hasn’t been seen in the story before this.

(Disclaimer: Most if this is regarding ch 169, so if any of this has been mentioned by someone else before, original credits are directed to them)

Canopus** (Doll)

This is where the theories for the orphanage arc start

I will be connecting Canopus to the dog orphanage because all the other Lord seem to have connections to one of the new settings. Although orphanage is the only one left (process of elimination), there are still some connections between Canopus and Lord Canopus who I think is Doll.

Canopus is the second brightest star in the sky (1st is obviously Sirius) and it is a part of the Carina constellation, which stands for the lower part of a ship. Carina used to be a part of the Argo Navis ex-constellation until it was divided into 3 others. Argo Navis means Argo Ship. It is the ship used for the quest for the Golden Fleece. Carina doesn’t have a legend for itself so it ties with the myth for Argo Navis. Other 2 constellations that were a part of Argo Navis are Vela and Puppis, whose names also stand for parts of a ship.

How ships and sailors tie in with Doll is through the circus which was named “Noah’s Ark Circus”. To summarize, Noah had a boat (Ark) which carried 2 of each species on Earth to conserve life after God flooded everything else.

If we consider Argo Navis as Noah’s Ark Circus, we can relate Carina, Vela and Puppis to the 3 pieces of the circus. Carina is Doll, Snake is Vela and the deceased circus members are Puppis (meaning back of the ship therefore making it seem like they’re left behind in a roundabout way).

We already know that Doll is a bizarre doll and a newer model too. So, it corresponds with the other confirmed Lord Polaris, and relates to Layla as Vega. It would make sense for Undertaker to have revived someone without any family to look for them and to have given them command over a blood collection operation.

Let’s look at the Canopus bedroom in Sphere Music Hall blood experiments wing.

Compared to the rooms of all the other star lords, it doesn’t have any personal decoration or belonging of any kind. Much like a hospital or a hotel room, it seems to be for temporary residence. A logical explanation regarding Doll would be that she was only kept here until she was able to move on her own. The bandages could be from the injuries Sebastian gave her.

The lack of any personal belonging could be because Doll is used to frequently moving around rooms in the circus. She didn’t do anything special to settle in with OC when they were roommates too.

The placement of the stool doesn’t match either object in the room. It’s too far back for anyone to have looked into the mirror (for makeup or sth you know) or for someone to have helped whoever was on the bed to take of the bandages in the orientation shown above. Maybe it was pushed away as Doll went up to the mirror and saw that Undertaker fixed her eye after ripping off her bandages by herself. (This is very deep speculation without any concrete proof)

The speech bubble belonging to Lord Canopus is impatient, wanting to begin the plan for bringing back RC. This could be about Doll wanting to take revenge on OC as soon as possible.

I would also like imagine Doll’s real name is Carina, because it’s a great name with a beautiful meaning. It peaked in the era that she is living in as well.

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Thank you for reading!

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emwallas176 · 10 months

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Good vs Right (GO2 meta)

[Disclaimer: Good Omens Season Two Spoilers]

So, I have a lot of thoughts about the finale...

More specifically, I have a lot of thoughts about Aziraphale and how/why he did what he did. I feel like I usually understand/relate to Crowley's character more easily so it was kind of fun getting a chance to break down Aziraphale's character for once and try and get inside his head. Anyway, I hope someone else finds this interesting because I had a lot of fun writing it!

(DISCLAIMER: GOOD OMENS SEASON TWO SPOILERS)

Good vs Right

(A Mini Essay on Aziraphale and Heaven’s Toxic influence)

By: Me

I’ve seen, since the release of the final episode of Good Omens Season Two, a lot of varying reactions from fans. A lot have jokingly raged against Neil Gaiman — the majority creator of the tv show and the original story of Good Omens — for the painful end of the season ( I will admit to being among them). A lot of fans also have hope that, if the story has the opportunity to continue, it will get better and reach a satisfactory end (I also have this dream). A lot of fans do not agree with Aziraphale’s decision to go back and lead Heaven. I very much do not agree either. When I first finished the episode, I asked myself “Why? Why would he do that? How could he do that?” And I think I’m finally starting to understand it now that I’ve had time to think about it in-depth.

In order to understand the end of Season Two we must go back to the beginning, to a garden on a nice day (yes, that far). The first we see of Aziraphale, he is on watch in the Garden of Eden and we learn very quickly that he has just given his holy flaming sword to Adam and Eve who have just been cast out. As far as character introductions go, this is a great one. Not only do we get the dynamic of Crowley and Aziraphale and their opposing roles as demon and angel instantly established. We also are introduced to the epitome of that which is Aziraphale’s character: Doing Right vs Doing Good. By giving his sword away, Aziraphale, for the first time ever, choses doing good over doing right. This introduction, while demonstrating the importance of Aziraphale’s title as an angel of God, also frames it in a way that suggests, when push comes to shove, Aziraphael would rather be a good person than a good angel.

Following that, many years later Aziraphale finds himself standing at the base of Noah’s Arc right before the Great Flood. His conversation with Crowley illuminates both his aversion to what is about to happen and his compliance through inaction. It seems pretty clear that he doesn’t want the Earth to flood, but neither is he willing to stand against God and stop it. When Crowley asks if even the children are to be killed, Aziraphale looks even more uncomfortable. Killing innocent children is a quintessentially evil act, and yet it is being done by his benevolent God. These two facts are contradictory. Aziraphale reconciles this by falling back on the one word that has always swayed his doubts — ineffable. He believes that God knows better, that God is good and therefore must also be right. Unfortunately, we do not get to see Aziraphale’s reaction when the flood finally does come, but I’d bet that his doubts during those forty days and forty nights are louder than they ever had been before.

Another instance of note is during the minisode of Job. In it, Aziraphale finds out that God has entered into a bet with Satan about the human Job. To test his faith, Satan is allowed to commit atrocities against Job and everything he loves. One of these tests is that Job’s children are to be killed (again, innocent children). Aziraphale, when speaking to Crowley who has been sent to complete the job, shares his disapproval. Later, Aziraphale even goes to Crowley and pleads with him to not kill the children. This could be seen as a small rebellion against God’s wishes, but I don’t think Aziraphale sees it as that. He is not pleading for God to make a change; He is pleading to Crowley and, by association, Hell. Despite that, despite his obvious disagreement with what is about to take place, Aziraphale walks away.

We see it time and time again through the series. Aziraphale has a better moral compass than the other angels. He knows when something is not good. And yet he is unwilling to directly influence anything. He doesn’t stop Crowley when he thinks he is going to kill the children, but when Crowley ends up saving the children later on, Aziraphale doesn’t stop him then either. He is merely a bystander. It isn’t until near the end of the minisode when he lies directly to Gabriel and the other angels’ faces that he gains any true agency in the situation. More importantly, in the final scene of the minisode Aziraphale asks if Crowley is there to take him to Hell. This shows us that Aziraphale lied to protect Job’s children while believing that it would lead him to fall. And yet he did it anyway. I believe this gives us a lot of insight into Aziraphale’s mindset. This, similar to when he gave away his sword, is one of the few instances in which he choses being good over being right. And it terrifies him.

Aziraphale is terrified to fall. Being an angel is a huge part of his identity and to lose that would be traumatizing. Not only does it scare him because Hell is, well, Hell. But because Hell is the place where bad people go and if he falls then that means he is bad. This is Aziraphale’s biggest fear. His entire character, his entire life is based on the belief that he is doing good, so it is understandable that he doesn’t want to fall. Unfortunately, Heaven is no longer based on doing good. They (meaning the collective entity that is Heaven) believe more in doing right than doing good. But Aziraphale doesn’t see that. His faith in Heaven means that he doesn’t understand that, for others, there is a disconnect between the two concepts.

This misunderstanding puts an enormous strain on Aziraphale. It also leads me to what, I believe, is Aziraphale’s biggest motivator, which is Moral Perfectionism. The best summary I’ve found on this idea comes from an article from the 16personalities site which describes two kinds of perfectionism: Material and Existential. Most of us understand the more common use of perfectionism (material) which focuses on attention to details — perfect grammar, perfect grades, perfectly clean room. This type of perfectionism is more tangible, whereas moral (existential) perfectionism is more abstract and, in some ways, more personal as it pertains to an individual’s character and sense of identity. The article describes people with moral perfectionism as people who “try to be perfect on a moral, rational or even spiritual level… For someone dealing with existential perfectionism, “Am I a good person?” is the unrelenting question. Furthermore, for them, the “good” in the question usually means “perfect.”” Sound familiar? Maybe like a certain angel we know?

Aziraphale is obsessed with always being good because he believes that even one simple mistake could mean the end of who he is and all he loves. If he isn’t an angel, he isn’t good. If he isn’t an angel, he can’t continue to help humanity or even just experience humanity. Falling means failing.

Fast Forward to the end of the world. Aziraphale is faced with the ultimate choice. He can either follow orders and do nothing or he can act and save everything that he loves. And he chooses to act. Of course, he only does so after Crowley words it in a way that makes it seem as if they are not directly opposing Heaven and Hell, but for the sake of the argument let’s say that, deep down, Aziraphale knows what he’s doing is treasonous. He goes against Heaven and Hell and it takes a lot of bravery, but he does it. And when Heaven and Hell (Gabriel and Beelzebub) come to punish him, Aziraphale takes one out of Crowley’s book and reframes the situation. It may be that he has gone against the Great Plan, but it may not be the Ineffable Plan. This is his justification and it works. It gives Aziraphale more freedom to make his own choices because he no longer has to follow a script he doesn’t fully believe in. When the first season ends, Aziraphale and Crowley are free from both Heaven and Hell, and they enjoy their new future over a toast where they say “To the World”. It is the perfect quote to represent their love for humanity, for free will, and for choosing good.

So we go back to the final scene in Season Two. We go back with a new perspective, one in which Aziraphale is motivated by fear, one in which he is a moral perfectionist and desperate to be both good and right. And it all makes a little more sense.

In the final scene of Season Two, Aziraphale comes back into the bookshop after talking to the Metatron looking extremely excited. He steamrolls over Crowley, definitely not reading the room, and tells him the “good news”. Now, for anyone who watched the show, I’m sure you knew that Crowley was never going to be happy about that news. For two seasons we’ve seen him show nothing but resentment towards Heaven. And one might (Aziraphale certainly does) interpret that as bitterness, for being cast out of a place he can’t but wishes to return to.

This is not the case. Crowley has mentioned before to Aziraphale that he is not “nice”. At one point in time, he even shoves Aziraphale against a wall for saying so. He is very adamant about not being nice. Similarly, in the bandstand scene, Crowley tells Aziraphale that he is “unforgivable”. Aziraphale, after thousands of years knowing Crowley, knows that neither of these things are true.

But I don’t think Crowley really believes these things either. I think he rebels against the idea of being “nice” because it feels too much like being associated with Heaven. Heaven is supposed to be full of the nice guys and he certainly isn’t one of them anymore. Being called nice, when Aziraphale does it at least, means being called inherently good. You’re nice because you’re supposed to be. And that is certainly not the case for Crowley. He’s not supposed to be nice. He’s supposed to be bad, to be evil, a demon. But he choses differently. And when Aziraphale calls him nice it feels like he’s diminishing the absolute effort it takes for Crowley to be good. He isn’t nice. He’s not supposed to be. But he does nice things anyway. And that means a whole lot more than being inherently nice. I’m sure there is other reasoning that makes Crowley adverse to compliments (and I have a few more theories of my own) but to resist going on a tangent we will limit it to that line of reasoning for now.

Similarly, when Crowley says he’s “unforgivable”, it isn’t a value judgment of himself. Crowley has shown several times throughout the show how he doesn’t believe he did anything wrong. He doesn’t believe he deserved to be cast from Heaven. What he means is that he — quite literally — will not be forgiven. He has a better understanding of how Heaven and God work. He knows that Heaven is a corrupt system. He knows that God is not all benevolent. That’s the point he’s trying to make. He’s trying to open Aziraphale’s eyes to the truth, to the imperfection that exists on “his side”. Heaven isn’t all good. He tries to tell him. They will never accept me back, and I would never go back to them even if they did.

Which is why Aziraphale’s offer — his excitement at the idea — is so devastating. He doesn’t understand what Crowley has been trying to tell him this whole time. Crowley doesn’t want to go back to Heaven. He doesn’t want to because “we're better than that”. Crowley isn’t one to follow blindly. He’s an independent thinker. It’s the whole reason why he fell. He’s always felt like he’s on his own. But at the same time, he was never really alone. Because he had always thought — hoped — that Aziraphale was at least with him on this. “you're better than that, Angel,” he says and he means it. He’s spent lifetimes believing that Aziraphale is one of the last angels who believe in doing good.

And he’s right. Only Aziraphale doesn’t know that. He thinks the system can be saved. He still believes that Good and Right are the same thing. Because if they aren’t, then maybe God made a mistake. Maybe it was wrong to cast Crowley out (wonderful, demonic, good-by-choice, good-despite-everything Crowley). However… If Crowley comes back to Heaven, then Aziraphale’s world view doesn’t have to crumble. He can do that reframing technique he loves so much. He can tell himself that Crowley falling wasn’t a mistake, just a temporary setback, a lesson that needed to be learned. He’s begging, pleading for Crowley to fix things once again, to do this one thing for him so that everything doesn’t have to change. “Crowley, come back to Heaven!” “Work with me!” “We can be together!” “Angels... doing good!” Angels. Doing good. It’s all that Aziraphale wants. But he can’t have that. Because he says, “I don't think you understand what I'm offering you.” And Crowley responds with, “I understand. I think I understand a whole lot better than you do.”

Because… Good and Right aren’t the same thing. And Aziraphale doesn’t understand that. It’s not entirely his fault. This notion is his own kind of coping-technique, the way he justifies all the bad. He wouldn’t have made it this long as an Angel otherwise. Because doubt leads to questions and questions lead to falling. And falling is failing. And Aziraphale is terrified of failing. For thousands of years, he’s existed under the thumb of Heaven’s power, a system built to motivate through fear, through punishment (the threat of the fall).

So it makes sense why Aziraphale is the way he is. And it hurts all the more because looking at it through that lens makes the season finale seem almost inevitable. Aziraphale was always going to be excited by the Metatron’s proposition. And Crowley was always going to say no. And they were always going to end up where they are now, one way or another. Because for as much they’ve worked against Heaven and Hell together, fighting for freedom, fighting for themselves (their own side), they aren’t really together. Aziraphale still supports the system. Crowley still wants to see it destroyed. They are still on different sides.

My hope is that in the Third Season (please, please, please, let us have a Third Season) Aziraphale is able to learn that Good and Right aren’t the same thing and that sometimes doing the good thing means going against what you’re told is right. But I hope he doesn’t have to fall to learn that lesson. More importantly, I hope he doesn’t lose his hope and kindness and faith. There’s something beautiful about believing in goodness. So I guess I’ll end by saying, I think Aziraphale is a flawed character, and I don’t agree with some of the things he does, but, I think, this meta has helped me to better understand him. Because good writing isn’t having characters always make good decisions. It’s about making the bad decisions believable. And Aziraphale’s journey is incredibly believable and human and compelling. I can’t wait to see what happens next!

(And if you've stuck around this long, thank you for coming to my Ted Talk)

#good omens #good omens 2 #rambles by me #long rambles #Aziraphale #ineffable divorce #character study #character analysis #Neil Gaiman why #renew good omens #Crowley #(but it's not about him)#maybe I'll shout into the void about him another time #I have a lot of feelings about Crowley #And Good Omens in general #good writing #but I'm scarred #what will happen next #I wonder

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