#with poor life choices

[soleiltac]

Okay, recently I found out the information from Disney Wiki that AUTO from WALL-E is the only non-sentient robot in the movie. And I don't feel like that. :(

I am aware that he is meant to be an antagonist, the "villain" of the story as he follows his directives like there's no tomorrow. But, I didn't think this trait should define ALL of his personality. Like, he clearly had emotions and showed them in a restrained way. Or at least I thought he did?

I decided to rewatch it.

Warning: spoilers, potential grammar, punctuation mistakes. Excuse me, english is hard!

***

Why do I think AUTO is a sentient robot? My observations.

• Every bot on this ship is capable of emotions, when why an intelligent steering wheel isn't?

• Well, why, he actually has them! You can tell it by his body language and a tone of deep synthesized voice.

He expresses:

1. Frustration, annoyance.

- "CAPTNNNNN D:" – AUTO said calmly.

2. Surprise.

- He is genuinely shocked to see WALL•E with 'the p l a n t' on his head. I actually laughed at his reaction.

- "n ot pos sible! 0:" every now and when.

3. He is persistent and blutantly stubborn. Strict on himself. Some people can be like that without any directives.

- Captain McCrea needed to give AUTO 'a stern look' for him to share the information about directive. AUTO reluctantly obliged. (At least he tried to reason with Captain.)

- "sir, i INSIST you give me the plant." (Dutch Van der Linde voice here: "he INSISTS...")

- (And the whole plot obviously.)

4. Anger, fear. McCrea: – You want it? Come and get it, blinky.

Auto: – N O.

- "E N ouGh" 😡 *flips the ship around impulsively*

- "NOT POSSIBLE D:" but with more panicking tone.

- "NoOOo..." when he gets deactivated.

• The whole sequence with manual is... interesting.

- At this point of the story AUTO ordered GO-4 to steal the plant from EVE to make her look defective in Captain's eyes.

- I felt how much AUTO and McCrea are tired of each other's presence. AUTO is patiently anticipating McCrea's attention, he is eager to do his job.

(- Captain tries to imitate jogging in his seat and AUTO for some reason looks at him with puzzled and uncertain look. )

- AUTO keeps pretending like he doesn't know anything...

• Which is actually not a common thing for robots. "Lying is a human emotion." (c) HAL 9000

And yes, hiding the truth is considered to be lying too.

It's not like he was instructed to lie by his superiors, they didn't care. But rather it's the tactic that he learnt while being active for 700 years. I bet he understands it would be much easier to secretly yeet the plant into space without bothering captain with a decision. I suppose it required some thinking in his mechanical brain.

When why does he show the captain an operation manual? Good question. My personal headcanon: he loves doing his job so much, it doesn't matter for him if it can increase risks towards his global goal. That is why I can tell it wasn't a programmed, logical decision of the machine. If non-sentient perfect AUTO knew about A-113, he wouldn't let captain see the possibility at all. He hasn't considered that his domestic human pet might get interested in whole "Earth" thing. And he hasn't considered sentient WALL•E and EVE as serious obstacles. He did a crucial mistake to satisfy his ego... Or... Or maybe not? It's a headcanon, after all. Maybe it was a part of protocol. Or maybe he tried to entertain McCrea. AUTO seems to care about him in some way as he didn't push him out off the power until the last moment. (uwu) Choose whatever you like more. It's a thought-provoking subject.

• That aside, have you noticed that there is not a single character in the movie who would not be terrified of having to leave the comfort zone? It's only AUTO, who is opposing this idea for the sake of survival. Recolonizing nearly-dead Earth is not an easy work, someone can get really hurt and, well, die. And knowing that AUTO is based on famous computer HAL 9000, who is, in fact, killed people because of his panic attack (he didn't want to be deactivated/murdered), this situation kinda gets a new meaning? It's an interesting perspective to look at AUTO's character, too. AUTO, like HAL, at the start of story was okay and non-hostile towards others. Eventually, as the story progresses, AUTO becomes more and more impatient, eager to complete his primary task, thus taking violent measures. In AUTO's eye WALL•E & EVE are rogue robots anyway, defected and dispatchable. But attacking the captain? AUTO's final step to AI "madness" was fighting the man he is designed to serve. And though I believe he wouldn't kill him, we can imagine AUTO was panicking at this moment. So, no programmed logic there either, pure emotion of fear and reckless behaviour, almost like HAL. And HAL is 100% sentient and conscious entity.

*** Well...

Maybe it's just me and my anthropomorphizing tendencies on non-living fictional objects. I can be self-projecting too much, so if you disagree, let's say it's my headcanons and leave that at that. After all, AUTO is a direct representation of BnL – heartless company, that destroyed life on Earth and continued destroying it in space. They made humans, their customers, helpless like babies! And I am afraid it could only be worse in the future, if it wasn't for WALL•E and EVE.

It's quite a tragedy that AUTO can't escape from this never-ending system of least resistance and comfort. He is the system. He is made to be an autopilot of Axiom, he IS the Axiom, programmed to do his job fully dedicated to the mission of saving mankind. And if he was really fully-sentient... well, it would've made his life even more miserable. What's the use of the steering wheel on Earth surface? It's not like they are gonna fly into space again. Captain's dead and woah, hello eternal loneliness, next generation forgets about your existence or decides to ignore it like a bad memory about containment. Even AUTO's closest henchman GO-4 is forever destroyed... *sigh*

I am overthinking too much, aren't I? Gosh, this wheel NEEDS a redemption arc. And friends. My heart bleeds for him, really.

#AUTO is a sentient being #with poor life choices #nevertheless #give him a chance to be nice #I made it angsty in the end #analysis? #text #wall e #wall e auto #my thoughts #ai

[delborovic]

Watched the Fallout tv show! Had a good time, had to doodle my favorite ♥

#his intense expressions and poor life choices have bewitched me #fallout #fallout prime #fallout maximus #maximus fallout #fanart #portrait #blood tw #i am still so tired and so behind on so many things haha #will probably be only the doodliest of arts for a while yet

[local-cryptid]

i am devastated

#dont look at me i cant handle eye contact right now #tbb #the bad batch #tbb spoilers #tbb finale #tech does NOT live #and im about to make poor life choices #tbb tech #clone trooper tech #tech my beloved we never even got to see you without your goggles #my own memes

[meredithmoriarty]

Help, I'm being bullied by an amnesiac!

#we're bffs and our love language is questioning each other's poor life choices #baldur's gate 3 #shadowheart #bg3 #fan art #tav #astarion #adeline #minor spoilers #comic

[arcadeplayer-nickonz]

i was listening to TV Girl and suddenly i was compelled to drew these bastards

they suit the post valentines mood

#rick and morty #rick and morty fanart #rick sanchez #prickcest #or at least implied? #rick prime #rick c137 #don't you just hate having a hologram of your nemesis haunt you? so does Rick but he hasn't managed to get rid of him #guess old man Rick is stuck with a reminder of his poor life choices #i don't exactly ship anything within the series but somehow my interest was very much peaked at the idea that these two had a fling in past #so these doodles are a result of that- #bottom sketches were just me messing around with brushes and drawing the younger duo #nickonzart

[lizziestudieshistory]

Someone send help, this is my "currently reading" pile and I'm fearful it's going to topple over if I keep going at this rate! Worst part is this isn't a complete picture of how out of control I am because I'm reading two fantasy books on my Kobo!

#books #reading #bookblr #currently reading #nightstand #bedside table #booklr #please ignore my antibiotics on top... #in my defence three of these are history related because I MAY be applying for a PhD for 2025 entry #but the rest are just the product of no self control and poor life choices #Oh and I'm not actually worried it's going to fall onto the lot candle

[theminecraftbee]

future ravager names for ravager replacements, according to tango: "Skill Issue" or "Poor Life Choices".

#stream liveblogging #imagine. [hermit] was killed by Skill Issue #[hermit] was killed by Poor Life Choices #that's incredible

[waterdeeping]

straightforward inclination pawns my beloved 💜

#i just started my second playthrough and my new main pawn is a beastren called brynjar who has the straightforward inclination #and honestly it’s the best choice i could have made he’s done nothing but sass me every 5 seconds for my poor life choices and i adore him #capcom really went out there and just threw pawns at us that call us out for how terribly we play video games huh #i love it so much #dd2 #dragon's dogma 2 #pawn #dd2 pawn

[copingchaos]

#poor steven #he truly looks done #like he's rethinking every life choice #same boat tbh #literally me everyday when i wake up #mood knight #moon knight #edit #meme #steven grant #marc spector #jake lockley

[crazydaymycrazyway]

Alberu: Let's be more than friends

Cale: Aren't we already?

Alberu: What? Since when?!

Cale: What do you mean since when? Is your memory alright?

Alberu: How come I didn't know about it?

Cale: Seriously hyung, you yourself declared me as your sworn brother and now you forgot?

Alberu: ...

Alberu: Why did I even try?

#trash of the counts family #tcf #lout of the counts family #lcf #cale henituse #alberu crossman #alberu crossman × cale henituse #albcale #cale is dense #when it comes to other ppl's feeling for him #poor alberu #he's contemplating his life choices #he's thinking why he fell in love with a dense idiot #he still loves him anyway #the kids watching facepalmed #even they get it #come one cale! #incorrect quotes

[theayesphere]

Missed our last session of Baldur's Gate 3? Catch up on our YouTube channel!

#the ayesphere #ayeforscotland #thebibliosphere #youtube #badlurs gate 3 #baldur's gate 3 #also subscribe to keep watching Joy make poor life #vampire-shaped choices 😂 #Youtube

[felixakranken]

TWF fans have a strange habit of, for lack of a better word, woobifying Mr. Walten.

I think a lot of you seem to take this series a lot less serious than it actually is, and those same people have a very bad habit of making Jack out to be a saint. He's just a normal guy. Just because he loves his family doesn't mean he's some sweet and perfect guy who has no flaws. I never see any of you discuss or portray his anger issues that Martin has mentioned numerous times.

You all blatantly ignore the fact that Sophie's only memories she retained of him were that he was angry and he worked all the time. Just because he loves his family and didn't abuse them doesn't mean he's perfect. To deny him of these flaws take away what a dynamic character he's being written to be.

We know Felix sucks. We all know this because no one shuts up about it. That's his best friend of 20 years, someone he chose to have around his family, and someone he chose to start a business with. Felix's actions don't reflect on Jack, obviously, but you have to think about the fact they are best friends of 2 decades.

The small bit we know about Jack and what things Martin has let on to his personality over time is very different than what everyone makes him out to be, and it's strange. If you choose to ignore that Jack is just a normal middle-aged man in the 70s, that's on your own inability to actually like the character that's there.

#I could continue about this rant but truly it's grating on my very last nerve #i remain the only guy on this site that likes the workaholic chainsmoker 40 year old man #you guys do realize a guy can be goofy and love his family and also have flaws #does anyone remember when martin said that jack and felix hang out at bars together? we ignoring that? #just like how we ignore the sophie's memory of him on the site? #or how martin has said when jack dislikes something he actively shits on it (cartoons fashion choices music etc) #its weird to make him out to be some poor saint of a father who has zero flaws and his only personality traits are i love my wife !!! #him being a normal human with a multifaceted personality makes what happened all the more sad and realistic. he was a normal guy #with a normal life that was torn apart in a horrific unforeseeable accident. let him be dynamic. let him be an actual character and not jus #some goofy cartoon funny man. #rant over #twf #the walten files #jack walten #🥃.txt

[tampire]

Melissa McCarthy as Ursula in The Little Mermad (2023)

#Ursula #Ursula The Sea Witch #The Little Mermaid #filmedit #tlmedit #thelittlemermaidedit #ursulaedit #Melissa McCarthy #Disney #disneyedit #My Gif #userstream #userbbelcher #chewieblog #weheartevilwomen #ladiesblr #Poor Unfortunate Souls #Life's Full Of Tough Choices Innit #tvanndfilm #dailyfilmgifs #Drag #Drag Queen #dragsource

[dragon-razor-writings]

Jaune: “Come on, I’m a responsible adult!”

Ren: *raises brow* “Really now?”

Jaune: “...I am an adult.”

Ren: “You bought more merch, didn’t you?”

Jaune: “...No?”

Pyrrha, with the Disappointed Parent Gaze™: “Jaune…”

Jaune: “Come on, it was a limited edition!”

Weiss: “You spent $500 in two hours, Jaune.”

Jaune: “Hey, at least it’ll be around for more than 48 hours.”

Nora: “Okay, I know that was a dig at me, but I don't really have a response that would make me look better. Touché.”

#rwby #rwby shitpost #jaune arc #weiss schnee #nora valkyrie #pyrrha nikos #ren lie #rwby college life au #He shall do the college staple: poor financial choices #which isn't that big of a deal #but still funny anyways

[rainbow-cadenza]

elder to elder communication

#WELCOME TO THE FAMILY KERRY #yes poor mama welles is questioning all of her life choices #cyberpunk 2077 #cp2077 #kerry eurodyne #mama welles #shitpost

[themadlu]

Astarion's Star Elf Background Headcanons

In collaboration with the lovely @spacebarbarianweird!

A bit of a less popular take on Astarion’s background headcanons—I know it is generally accepted that he is originally a moon elf from the Faerunian upper class, but, between in-game trivia and developing my own stories, a different idea came up. 

I’ll outline why I think the Star Elf headcanon fits the sassy elf, and how it plays into his storyline.

Obviously, this is all done for the shits and giggles, so every headcanon is valid, and I’d love to hear about different takes on Astarion’s origins!

Race: Star Elves

Star Elves, or Ruar-tel-quessir, have only recently returned to Faerun due to repeated attacks by an extra-planar entity on their home-realm of Sildëyuir. 

Because of their prolonged absence and reclusive communities, Star Elves are not familiar with most of Toril’s customs and history. In Sildëyuir, they had no contact with most other species (such as humans, dwarves, halflings, gnomes, etc.), and they prefer to keep to themselves once in Faerun too. 

They are particularly wary of humans, as their misuse of magic and warmongering tendencies were what caused Star Elves to flee Toril in the first place. 

They consider themselves better than most other races, only getting along with other elves. They fear for Moon Elves and half-elves who mix with other species, and they consider them overly-generous and too naive. 

As such, Star Elves tend to come across as aloof and cautious. (I know this may not sound like Astarion at all, but bear with me).

Their moral alignment is purely chaotic, with a majority of them being in the chaotic good or neutral categories. 

Physically, Star Elves share some traits with their fellow Moon Elves: light skin (check) and gold, red or silver (check) hair. 

However, Star Elves have grey or violet-coloured eyes with gold flecks in them (imagine an Astarion with violet eyes!).

Star Elves are also taller than other elves, standing between 5½ to 6 ft tall, with a slender build.

They are also considered extremely beautiful by human standards, much more so than any other type of elf. 

Astarion’s Background as a Star Elf:

Right, let’s talk about objective things first: physicality. 

Astarion fits the Star Elf type quite well: 

He has silver hair, light skin (given he is still the palest of the bunch even after he is well fed).

He fits the height range at 5 ft 9.

He has a slender body (a bit too built for an elf, but that is likely Larian knowing what sells),

Most importantly, he is strikingly handsome. Exceedingly so, more than most other elves in the game. 

As there is no confirmation about pre-vampirism eye colour, in my head he used to have violet eyes. I think that would have made him stand out in Baldurian society even more. 

Which gets me to the more subjective part of personality and backstory. 

Aloof and cautious may not be the first qualities that come to mind thinking of Mr Sass, but work with me. 

Someone aloof is not overly friendly, being cool and distant instead. Is Astarion friendly? I mean, genuinely friendly to people, and not forcing himself to look eager because he is forced to do so by Cazador or by circumstances? 

He threatens Tav as soon as they meet, is snarky with everyone else for a good portion of Act 1 (and with some even during Act 2 and 3), and at the end of game party he keeps mostly to himself.

Ultimately, Tav is the only one he seems comfortable enough to be open and friendly with, and that requires a lot of trust, care and work (especially for good-aligned Tavs). 

As for the cautious side, he is a bloodthirsty little shit who loves a good fight, but he doesn’t strike me as someone who would throw himself into desperate situations (without proper compensation at least). 

He disapproves of Tav doing things for free or forcing him into situations where the risks are too great, often stating that ignoring those needing help is the easiest thing, they just need to ‘look away and keep walking’. 

His inherent racism towards other races (ehem, gnomes) can be a result of spending his early years in a very secluded environment.

He presents himself as someone loving life luxuries, but I think that's his Baldur's Gate, more constructed persona. He seems just as happy to fondle about in the dirt TWICE, despite claiming he is not used to it. Maybe he's not as upper class as he wants to appear.

Granted, these traits may be a result of him being a glorified sex slave subject to unimaginable torture for 200 years, but I think his need to be have the upper hand in power dynamics existed before his undeath too.

The chaotic nature is evident, and I headcanon he starts off as chaotic neutral, starts leaning into the evil side as he gets corrupted by power first and by abuse after, then he can either get back to chaotic neutral with a good-aligned companion or become fully chaotic evil as the Ascendant. 

And this leads me to the actual backstory.

Astarion’s Backstory:

Larian originally set Astarion out to be a noble, then changed his background to charlatan and, in some lost character sheet, courtesan (fancy type of prostitute). I’ll stick with the final charlatan/courtesan version. 

Astarion was born somewhere in Faerun in a community of Star Elves. 

His family was of poor background, having fallen out with the leaders of the enclave.

That, paired with the isolation of the community, prompted Astarion to leave his home in his early 20s, slightly earlier than usual for elves. 

He wanted more from life than being stuck in a reclusive society and being looked down upon from others. He wanted to live a comfortable existence, be wealthy, be admired, and to achieve that he needed one thing: power. 

He headed to Baldur’s Gate (convincing fellow travellers to let him on their carts, horses, etc.) with nothing more than the clothes on his person, attracted by its reputation as a multicultural hub brimming with opportunities. He did forge some documents proving he already had some basic qualification to enter law school (not sure reclusive elves issue any), completed his studies and started a career as magistrate. 

During this time, he quickly realised how his looks were one of his biggest strengths in forging alliances. He had been complimented before, but most Star Elves are beautiful, so he was not as universally admired as he was in Baldur’s Gate. He used and abused this knowledge, flirting with individuals from many other races (gnomes aside, he has standards) and genders, enjoying the perks his smooth persona got him (money, status, promotions) and revelling in the adulation of his admirers.

He became even more power hungry, signing laws because they would benefit him or his upper class acquaintances rather than the general population. He was ready to do anything to achieve his goals. 

It was in one of the many soirees he attended that he came across Cazador (or rather, Cazador noticed him). The Vampire Lord saw an astonishingly handsome, young and inexperienced elf who could work most people around his manicured slim fingers and immediately singled him out. Studied him. I don’t think he introduced himself before turning him; rather, he gathered information about him via his connections and learned he was an up and coming magistrate, an outsider, conveniently with no family or stable relationships who would miss him or go look for him should he disappear. 

We know Cazador is a machiavellian villain, so he probably found a way to convince Astarion (through a bribe and pulling at his dislike of lower class vagrants) into signing a law forcibly evicting the Gur from the land they settled on, on the basis of it belonging to some patriar or noble and therefore their permanence being illegal. Cazador knew retaliation would be swift, and I bet he probably even had someone tell the Gur which magistrate had them kicked out. 

Cazador waited nearby while Astarion was being brutally assaulted, chasing off the Gur thugs to claim his prized future spawn. He didn’t need permission to bite Astarion and turn him, but he asked likely because he knew he would never turn down a chance at eternal life and because it would be another way to torment him later (‘Remember boy, I gave you the grace of my gift, you begged for it!’). Probably, Astarion’s last words as a living elf were, ‘Do…any…thing…please’. 

After becoming a spawn and suffering centuries of abuse, Astarion forgot about his past, himself and his family. He doesn’t even remember what type of elf he is (Moon or Star). His parents may still be alive, but with their life being secluded from the outside world, it is unlikely he will come across them in their lifetime.

#astarion #astarion bg3 #astarion headcanons #bg3 headcanons #cazador szarr #star elf #dnd lore #astarion with violet eyes lives in my head #poor background astarion makes poor life choices #bg3