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j4gm · 9 months

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SPOILERS!!! REFERENCES AND EASTER EGGS IN F&C ep. 2: SIMON PETRIKOV

Let me know if I missed anything!

First of all the title sequence is fucking cool. I don't want to speculate about the various things we see in it, like the apartment getting blown up or the Fern tree growing into its 1000+ version, because I'm sure the show will get round to all that!

The first scene was an awesome reintroduction to the post-apocalypse, showing us the dynamic between Simon and Marcy. The button popping off Marcy's dungarees was a reference to young Marcy's first appearance, Memory of a Memory, when she removed one of the buttons herself to fix Hambo's eye.

Simon was show playing a live set at Dirt Beer Guy's tavern in Obsidian. It seems they've gotten to know each other quite well over the past twelve years. Dirt Beer Guy asks Simon if he's read his new book draft, about a character called Joe Milkshake who was first mentioned in the episode Root Beer Guy.

Despite the fact we saw Jake in the trailers, Finn and T.V. pretty much confirm in this scene that Jake is dead, and has presumably been dead since before Obsidian. I guess Bronwyn wasn't the only Jake descendant who Finn took on as an apprentice, but T.V. doesn't seem all that into it. The Finn and Jake we saw in the trailer are likely from an alternate universe that we have yet to see.

Finn uses his weed whacker to cut through these bushes. A nice way of showing he's fully recovered from his Fern guilt. The focus here is very much on Simon's problems instead of Finn's.

Finn parts with Simon to go and visit Huntress Wizard. The nature of their relationship remains ambiguous and I expect it to stay that way.

Simon has the Island Lady from The Party's Over Isla de Señorita in his phone. I guess they reconnected after he became Simon again. He also has Abracadaniel. I always liked Ice King's friendship with Abracadaniel and the rest of the Order of Giuseppe so I hope they're still friends!

Cute Bubbline scene. Back in the episode Bonnibel Bubblegum, Mr. Creampuff suggested he and PB get matching tattoos. Now she's (trying to) do the same with the girl she's chosen rather than some guy who was chosen for her! Also Marceline is using the same phone she's been seen with in a few previous episodes, including Go With Me and Be Sweet.

I think the flying human city is called Up-Ton.

Choose Goose! He keeps coming back! And he's evil now! People were joking about him being the antagonist of Fionna and Cake after that weird post-credits scene in Wizard City and the fact he was in hell in Together Again. I wasn't expecting that to actually come true. Glob knows why he's hanging out in a cage in Simon's house.

The pattern of GOLB's eyes is reflected in Simon's glasses during the ritual. He is doing the same dance that Betty was doing to summon GOLB in the finale.

Among the objects in Simon's GOLB shrine are the Farmworld Enchiridion, the flying carpet that Simon stole from Ash and was later frequently used by Betty, the crocodile clips that Betty used for her magic rituals, two effigies of GOLB, and what looks to be the shell of the snail who was seen throughout the original series.

In this credits sequence, Fionna and cake are dreaming about the mask being worn by the bear than Finn slew, and a butterfly with a smiley face on it. Perhaps symbolising Finn?

Tune in next week for episodes 3 and 4!

#adventure time #fionna and cake #easter egg posts

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foone · 9 months

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idea: a warlock researcher. That's not a researcher of warlocks, but a researcher who is a warlock. At least, that's what they appear to be: They've got a patron and all, and they are able to research things incredibly effectively because their patron is able to find out all kinds of information for them.

But it turns out they're really a chronomancer: Their patron is themselves, in the future (or past, depending on how you look at it).

Their patron doesn't have incredible knowledge: their patron doesn't know anything they didn't spend the time to find out themselves.

But once they finish learning the thing, they send it back in time to their previous self, making it look like they got the answer immediately.

So, like, if you go to them and pay them a dozen gold to develop a reusable genderswap potion recipe, they'll call up their patron and their patron will hand them a scroll with the ingredients on it. Bam, done!

Except what actually happened is that they spent weeks or months studying the problem, scouring libraries, consulting other wizards, getting into swordfights with the God of Gender, and endless experimentation on their poor apprentices. Just when they were done, they sent the results back in time, undoing that branch of the timeline, resulting in the recipe appearing out of nowhere, a grandfather-paradox item with no creation event.

Really, 12 gold is a bargain for how much work they didn't have to do for you.

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dailyadventureprompts · 1 month

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Monster Hunt: Roilwreak, Temperamental Elemental

WHATS SHAKING YOU WIZARD BITCHES, GUESS WHO BROKE CONTAINMENT AGAIN?? THAT'S RIGHT, ITS MEEE!!!

Beginning life as an apprentice's over ambitious and much procrastinated thesis project, this arcane entity has entered into a troubled adolescence marked by making itself a calamitous nuisance. Being a Weird ( an elemental composed of two contradictory natures) Roilwreak is possessed by a destructive restlessness that only seems to find an outlet in causing problems for others, whether it be in property damage, petty arson, or the disarray of arcane workings for the sheer shit-disturbing fun of it.

Adventure Hooks

Roilwreak spends most of its time in a warded enclosure on the grounds of the academy in which it was summoned, tended to by apprentices and occasional studied for its unique ability to interfere with different kinds of magical energy. There's a rumour that upperclassmen (and even faculty) sometimes sneak in after hours to bargain with the elemental in order to fuel their more elaborate rituals.. which might be how the Weird managed to escape this time. Pheraps the homebrew potion dregs and scraps of firecrackers from the nearby market can point at a suspect.

The elemental has given the academy the slip and disapeared into the city's pipeworks, resulting in minor flooding as pipes crack under unexpected pressure and a number of injuries as a pubic fountain boiled off into scalding mist. The local garison have put a bounty out for whoever can slay the elemental, but the academy just want it returned safely. It IS a sapient creature after all, and it can't help that chaos is in it's nature.

A villainous mage has heard of the Weird's powers and wants to make use of them, binding Roilwreak into a weapon or draining off its energy for some awful ritual. Having organized an infiltration (or perhaps the current breakout) it's a race to see who can catch the hyper-charged herptile first.

#elemental #seeking power #wizard #mid level #low level #mystery #dnd #dungeons and dragons #d&d #ttprg #pathfinder #monster hunt #arcane

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natalieironside · 1 year

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There were some, like, fantasy guys dealing with fantasy problems and they were like "We need The Wizard for this" but The Wizard's apprentice was like "He's dead. :( I'm here, tho!" and went on the adventure and when they got to the place where a wizard would be most useful/necessary the apprentice takes The Wizard's ashes out of his backpack and resurrects The Wizard and it's revealed that The Wizard committed suicide shortly before the adventure guys got to his house because he didn't want to walk all that way and found an easy way to make his apprentice carry him.

I swear to Garsh I've read this plotline in a book or seen it in a movie or something but I cannot remember where and it's been bothering me my whole life

#if magic island and cowboys of moo mesa turned out to be real then i have hope for this one

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probablyfunrpgideas · 9 months

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Alternative Specialties For Con Artists

Maker of taxidermy cryptids.

"I can drink more ale than anyone" but you have a bag hidden under your shirt or a magical storage ability. After you win the bet you still have like, a week's worth of ale for later.

Pretend to cast Sending spells for a fee, make up a response.

Trick a wealthy person into committing a crime (or believing they have committed a crime), then ask for money to "make the problem go away".

Counterfeit spell scrolls for apprentice wizards. "Oh, that's too bad. You must not be ready for spells of the second order yet." Remember, people don't get to know the result of their caster level check when they try to use a scroll!

#idea #d&d #d&d 3.5 #d&d 5e #pathfinder #tabletop rpgs

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lorkai · 6 months

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づ A/N: This idea has been living rent free in my head for a few months now and I finally had time to sit and write down. Might write a part 2 but idk yet. Also reblogs are appreciated!

Characters: Thirteen, Solomon, Simeon & Barbatos

There are stupid things that are expected to be common sense. For example, everyone knows that eating Solomon's food is an extremely dumb idea. Alas you are dumb and decided to eat the pasta he had made after one lesson you had; resulting in you gaining immortality.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Thirteen is the first being to notice the change. Your candle is forever frozen just like Solomon's, motionless, the flames static and the reaper is left in a mix of feelings when she understands what happened; what that terrible wizard have done to you, poor you and your beautiful soul and mortality. She questions you about it as soon as she sees you, no matter who is around, questioning you about your immortality, about what happened and if you are happy with your decision.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ For her, this was what you wanted so when she finds out that you didn't even know about it Thirteen doesn't know how to react. You recount the day's events to her, how you trained magic with Solomon and then had dinner with him. It's so comical, so unbelievable, several humans searched for a way to obtain immortality and you just had to eat the food that Solomon prepared for you. She is crying with laughter and rolling on the floor at this point, however, the reaper will be more than happy to help you find a way to undo your immortality if you so desire.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Solomon was by your side when Thirteen appeared suddenly and he is so surprised by this information. I mean, he doesn't understand how a simple pasta can make you immortal since he himself only became immortal through one of his failed experiments, but he also didn't know his cooking could do this??? He is not at all sad about the news as now he know his beloved apprentice will live forever, however, yes, immortality has its downsides; the death of friends and family, the pain of remembering how you forgot their faces, voices and cherished memories and there is nothing you can do to get them back.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ But he is here to support you in every difficult and painful moment as well as in the most joyful and happy moments. He's here forever to be by your side, to give you a helping hand and a shoulder to lean on. Though saddened he would help find a way to reverse your mortality if you truly wished for it.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Simeon's mouth had never been so open. You, immortal? How, when, why? He listens to you recount the day's events, but he still can't comprehend how Solomon's dish could do something like this. Simeon knows that the thing Solomon calls food is capable of doing, but being able to grant immortality to someone? By heaven, he doesn't even know what to say, he doesn't even know what to do. Do you need to be comforted? Do you want a hug? Are you well? He's more nervous than you are, honestly. Simeon tries to calm you down and offers solutions to your problems.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ When everything was done and said, he felt a little happy. Angels don't know what the pain of loss is like and he wishes he didn't know what it's like, he wishes he didn't live to find out what life was like without you. You're like a ray of sunshine, so cheerful and chaotic and a welcome part of his life.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Barbatos found out about it from Simeon. The embodiment of "disappointed but not surprised", if you subjected yourself to eating the horrendous pestilence that was Solomon's food then you knew the risks you were taking and didn't care. The lord of time holds back from giving you a good lecture as soon as he sees you. Who in their right mind would eat that??? Why, MC, why??? He wants so much to understand what you were thinking at that moment and what you are thinking now, what you feel now, becoming immortal can be a bit shocking, even more so with all the pros and cons that come along with the experience of being immortal.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ He is the one who helps you adjust to your new life as the years go by. The one who helps you get a house, new documents and teaches you how to deal with everything when things get too much. He already did it once to his master and now he's going to do it to you now. If you ask and Diavolo allows it, Barbatos will look into the future for a way to reverse your immortality. That's your wish and he respects it but then why does this possibility leaves an empty feeling in his chest?

#obey me #obey me solomon #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #obey me thirteen #solomon x mc #solomon x reader #barbatos x mc #barbatos x reader #simeon x mc #simeon x reader #thirteen x mc #thirteen x reader

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captainlilyuniverseworld · 2 months

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What If...

What if Astarion and Gale had met years prior to the events of the mindflayer invasion? What if instead, Astarion had met a young wizarding apprentice at a bar?

Pairing: Astarion/Gale

Rating M (Nsfw under the cut)

Sweet and Supple

The tavern is noisy when Astarion walks inside, the conversation doesn’t stop but he clocks the interested stares and glances his way as he takes off his cloak and drapes it over his arm. It’d been a long day of signing warrants, issuing warrants, dealing with the petty problems of even pettier people and now he wanted a drink.

Maybe something tart. He passed by a young elfen woman. Her eyes like pools of water. Or spicey, the tiefling near the stairs to the second floor wasn’t hard on the eyes. Maybe robust? He ran a hand through his hair clocking the ranger at the bar.

He sat at the bar, a seat between himself and the ranger and drummed his fingers on the counter as he waited for the bartender. He ordered a glass of wine. Red. It tasted like vinegar but one did have to keep up appearances.

Astarion barely hid his grimace on the first sip and scanned the tavern again. He knew the ranger kept glancing at him. Could feel in the interested stare, the low hum of his pulse from the blood rushing through his veins.

He was prepared to give the ranger what he wanted when another smell reached his nose. Something soft and sweet. He turned in his seat, curious and narrowed his eyes at the young man almost huddled at a small corner table.

Young. With a soft face, dark eyes, shoulder length mousy brown hair. He kept scanning the bar as if he was waiting for someone but it was mostly nerves. There was a glass of wine on the table and a bottle.

Broken heart perhaps? Astarion titled his head to the side.

He ran his tongue over his teeth and stood, ranger forgotten as he made his way to the table. The young man startled when he saw Astarion leaning against the chair opposite him.

“They say drinking alone is worse than finding a kobold in a barrel of firewine,” Astarion smiled a bit. “Waiting for a friend?”

“I…was supposed to,” the young man nodded a little. “Seems, they forgot…” he cleared his throat. “I was just leaving though, you can uh, have the bottle if you like.”

“Now, what did I just say about drinking alone?” Astarion chastised with no real bite behind it. He pulled out the chair he’d been leaning against and sat down. “Stay a spell.” He looked at the bottle and whistled impressed. “Arkhen’s hoard? Pricey.”

“Is it? I uh…just sort of picked something random,” the other man admitted and rubbed the back of his neck.

Astarion leaned back in seat, glancing him over once more, taking in his appearance. He was dressed in a bit more finery than those of this particular tavern might be. There was a half of a crest that he could make out on the young man’s coat.

“You’re not from around here, are you?” Astarion guessed.

“I’m visiting from Waterdeep,” the young man told him. “I, well I was visiting Sorcerous Sundries. I had hoped to get a peak at some of their more priceless volumes but, even a student of the great Eliminster can’t get past the clerk…” he sighed. “I’m Gale, by the way.” He offered his hand.

Soft. Warm. He could feel his pulse quicken slightly.

“I’m Astarion,” he smiled and shook his hand.

****

“I um, I have a confession to make,” Gale glanced over at Astarion as they continued to walk down the street of the upper city.

They’d left the tavern a little after the sun had set completely, the air was cool and smelled like saltwater from the docks not too far off. Gale’s cheeks had a nice flush to them, almost rosy in color.

He’d gotten progressively closer to Astarion in the course of their walking. He didn’t seem to pay too much attention to his surroundings once he started talking and gods did he talk.

“I’m an apprentice wizard,” Gale told Astarion. “Elminster is my teacher and I’ve been told I’m something of a prodigy.”

“How modest,” Astarion had teased drinking more of his wine.

He talked about magic, he talked about Elminster, he talked about the Weave and someone named Mystra. Who she was, Astarion had no idea, but Gale was mesmerized by her it seemed.

“And what’s that dear boy?” Astarion asked.

Gale’s cheek darkened more at the term.

“I wasn’t actually waiting for anyone…” he rubbed the back of his neck. “I did go to Sorcerous Sundries, but I was hoping to speak to the man who owned the store, the wizard Lorroakan. All I got was a smart ass projection and a not very helpful rare book clerk.”

“So you intended to get drunk and forget it happened?” Astarion asked.

“More of less,” Gale nodded a bit embarrassed.

“Well, I’m glad,” Astarion mused. He reached out, first touching Gale’s cheek, running his thumb over the young man’s lower lip. “Because it meant that I got to meet you.”

“O…Oh?” Gale looked up at him.

Those big dark eyes, so open.

“Mhmm,” Astarion leaned in.

He took his time, both as not to startle Gale, but not so fast that he could pull away if this isn’t what he wanted. He brushed their lips together, Gale still hadn’t moved, but then he surged forward, pressing his lips more firmly to Astarion’s.

Astarion made a pleased sound in the back of his throat, backing them up they were partially hidden under one of the stone walkways. He pressed Gale against the stone wall, one hand at Gale’s lower back, the other braced on the wall.

Gale’s hands were around Astarion, gripping his coat so tightly Astarion was briefly worried it might tear. He only pulled away when he could feel Gale’s chest heaving against his own, the young wizard titled his head back against the wall, panting.

Astarion could almost hear the blood rushing in his veins and moved the hand against the wall to the back of Gale’s neck, wrapping some errant curls around his fingers. He kissed him against, working his way down his chin, his jaw, letting his teeth scrape against the soft skin of his throat.

Gale shivered parting his legs as Astarion nudged them apart with his knee.

Astarion peered up at him threw his lashes. Gale’s eyes were closed, his lips parted, panting. He licked a stripe up his throat and tugged at the ties of Gale’s pants. He wormed his had inside, wrapping his hand around Gale’s cock.

“This alright?” Astarion nibbled at his neck.

“Nng,” Gale thrust into his hand.

“Words darling, words,” Astarion teased.

“Ye..yes, fuck,” Gale held onto his coat tighter. “Please, please, please.”

And who was Astarion to deny such sweet words. He gave a few teasing strokes, smearing the precum along the length. Gale rocked his hand, trying to thrust into Astarion’s hand. His cock throbbed, the scent of him quickly filling the air.

Astarion quickened his pace wanting to time it just right, Gale’s pulse quickened and Astarion opened his mouth, sinking his fangs into the young wizard’s throat as Gale tensed pressing against him, grinding against his knee and hand as he spilled into his hand.

Astarion moaned as the blood filled his mouth. So sweet and supple. Like a pear just the right side of ripe. He pulled back, running his tongue along the marks he made. He slipped his hand from Gale’s pants, licking the spilled seed from his fingers.

Gale slumped against the wall, Astarion shouldering most of his weight. Not that he minded at the moment.

“That was uh...um…” Gale panted and swallowed.

“Wonderful? I couldn’t agree more,” Astarion leaned in and kissed him. Softly this time. “But alas, it is late. Where are you staying?”

“U…uh,” Gale licked his lips and swallowed. “The Elfsong.”

Astarion deftly retied Gale’s pants, stepping back so the young man could compose himself. “I shall walk you there.”

“Oh…I couldn’t ask you to do that,” Gale replied.

“Good thing you’re not asking,” Astarion told him.

The walk to the Elfsong was not as long as Astarion would have preferred. Feeding aside, he actually enjoyed the other man’s company. It was refreshing, not talking about warrants, and citations. Petty problems of the upper elite.

Astarion stopped just outside the Elfsong, with his hands in his pockets. “Will you be in Baldur’s gate long?”

“Couple more days,” Gale nodded. “I wanted to visit the Stormshore Tabernacle. They have a shrine dedicated to Mystra and I’d feel rude not paying my respects.”

“I’ve unfortunately got a mountain of paperwork to accomplish, but perhaps the day after tomorrow, we could do something a bit more proper?” Astarion asked.

“More proper as in, not shamelessly making out and ahem, shoving your hand down my pants,” Gale coughed lightly into his hand. “Not that I minded.”

Astarion chuckled and nodded. “Is that a yes then?”

“Yeah, yes,” Gale nodded.

“Good. Tomorrow night after next,” Astarion told him.

He watched Gale head into the Elfsong and ran his tongue over his teeth again. He could still taste remnants of the sweetness of Gale’s blood, the musk of his seed and turned on his heel as he began his walk home.

“Absolutely delightful,” he mused.

#baldurs gate 3 #bg3 #astarion #gale #gale of waterdeep #astarion ancunin #bloodweave #gale x astarion #what if scenario

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barely-living-wizard-apprentice · 1 year

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what about being an old ass wizard makes you answer every question with cryptic nonsense. "Only time will tell whether you surround yourself with allies or enemies" dude I just asked what kind of chips you want

#why do they make everything more difficult than needed #wizard posting #wizard apprentice problems #mentor

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the-gnomish-bastard · 10 months

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Turns out one of my apprentices has been teaching someone behind my back. He had his own secret apprentice that he was teaching everything that I taught him. Apparently, he had plans to overthrow me with his apprentice.

I’ve never been prouder. Both of them have been cast into the astral plane.

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troublesometrollhunters · 11 months

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Jim's sibling AKA reader meets douxie for the first time?

~ First his mom falls for a changeling and now THIS??? Jim's honestly tired of his families sheingians. He knows he's heads over heels for a sorcessres but that's a bit different.

~ You and Jim have always been close and after dad left you got even closer, which makes him protective of you even if your older. For a long time you didn't need anyone except your family and Toby. And for most of your life it really was just you, Jim, Mom, Toby and of course Aunt Nana. Until you and Jim started falling for different people. Jim fell for Claire and theater while you fell for Hisirdoux and music.

~ You met the handsome wizard at the cafe he works at. You were picking up an order before your college classes and one to drop off for your mom since Jim forgot to cook that week. He was so nice to you and the shop was really serene so it becomes your regular place and after awhile you just begin getting closer. You'd always loved that area but you'd never been into that cafe before that instance. And when you bumped into the mysterious hazel eyed stranger it just became apart of your routine.

~ When Jim became the Trollhunter you started seeing Douxie less and apprentally he noticed. After a long month of homework, trollhunting, and dealing with an angry mom, you popped into the cafe to get your favorite comfort pastry and drink. Douxie winks at you when he sees you, waving the charge and asking where you've been. You couldn't be more greatful as you began to drink your large order.

~ After the free drink and him really showing an interest in you, you ask him for his number. You begin texting regularly and even start to meet up on campus. Your still busy with trollhunting but you do your best to make time for him. You start seeing each other a lot more and get closer. You can't tell him about what's happening to you but you can tell him about the stress and all the pressure mom puts on you. He can't tell you about his wizarding night job but he can talk about his stressful cafe job and a growing pest problem in Arcadia.

~ Jim started to complain about a punk guy he'd seen around while you complained about a certain purple haired theater nerd. Neither of you understanding or knowing that you were talking about your respective girlfriend/boyfriend.

~ You finding out each other's secrets was an accident on both your parts. Hisrdoux was fighting some ancient evil from the shadow realm while you were going against a troll assassin sent by Gatto. As his spell collided with your enemy, your weapon went straight through his. It wasn't how you wanted him to find out and it wasn't how he was going to tell you but standing there adrenaline coursing through your veins you couldn't stop yourself from the kiss you'd wanted to give him for weeks now.

~ None of your confession went to plan. But neither did his. That wasn't how you wanted him to learn you were the Trollhunters sibling. And that's not how he wanted you to learn he was Merlin's Apprentice. But life doesn't always go the way you want to and while Merlin and Jim didn't love it you both loved each other and really? That's all that mattered.

#trollhunters #toa #toa x reader #wizards #wizards x reader #hisirdoux casperan #toa hisirdoux #wizards hisirdoux #hisirdoux x reader #douxie #douxie x reader #douxie casperan #douxie casperan x reader

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thecarnivorousmuffinmeta · 3 days

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I honestly cannot recall where I heard this, it could have been a comment or part of the fic, but the idea was that in TMWWBK if Tom had the chance to go back in time he'd take Lily before she even went to Hogwarts to really bring out her potential.

How would that go, you reckon? Would he just show up at Alphard's place with Lily, saying she's his new apprentice while omitting the fact he basically kidnapped her?

The Man Who Would Be King by me and @therealvinelle

Alphard mentions it in the disastrous Order meeting he and Lily attended where he noted that if Tom had his way, Lily wouldn't have attended Hogwarts at all where they'd teach her how to hold a wand wrong and that for Tom it makes sense to make her learn what to a wizard is fucking Muggle gibberish.

That said, it was an offhand comment Alphard didn't really think through nor have to. Tom would do it... but it'd get a little convoluted.

Tom Kidnaps an Eleven-Year-Old (Or Not)

I imagine he does not kidnap Lily because a) what the fuck would he do with an eleven-year-old b) he doesn't have to. I imagine what he does is he shows up after Lily's eleventh birthday and Lily's gotten the "yer a witch" spiel from McGonagall and says, "Hello parents, would you like an option where your daughter doesn't go to this magic school but learns how to control her powers and gets a five-star education?"

We don't see enough of Lily's parents to know how thrilled they were about her going to Hogwarts. We know that Lily ultimately went and that Petunia at least at the time wrote begging to go, we know Lily was stupid with displaying her magical abilities so the idea that their daughter was telekinetic/whatever you want to call it wasn't out of left field for them, but we don't know if it was something they liked the idea of. Given how Hogwarts is presented, could be her parents thought this was an opportunity she'd never otherwise get (the description of Spinner's End does not lend itself to the idea that Lily would have been attending a prestigious boarding school otherwise). Could be they were prepared from whatever Lily had learned from Snape and told them in turn (though we don't know how much that was/if it was much of anything). Could be they thought "you know, this is a great opportunity for Lily to learn how to control her weird psychic abilities that we clearly don't know what to do with" which is only emphasized by McGonagall.

However, the fact of the matter is that they're proposing sending Lily to the middle of nowhere Scotland, to a school that her parents are not allowed to visit or even see under any circumstances, where she'll learn nothing they're familiar with, and Lily won't be able to tell them much if at all. Oh, and they'll have a hard time even taking Lily to get her supplies because their world is built purposefully to exclude people without magic and make their lives as difficult as possible.

Regardless, good-looking Tom who happens to run into them in Diagon Alley and is advertising his tutoring/home schooling services, does a bang up job scaring the shit out of them about what can happen at Hogwarts (severe bullying, high death/injury rate, the Muggle-born problem, the fact that classes are kind of tailored to the lowest common denominator and not the best achievers)/what will likely happen to Lily when she graduates (0 prospects). By using Tom to homeschool her, Lily can continue to pursue her Muggle schooling, stay at home, and learn at a faster pace than Hogwarts will teach her.

(Lily, of course, will likely be mortified and horrified because here she and Severus have been so excited to go to Hogwarts, she really is a witch, this cool castle sounds great and now Severus is going without her, is telling her how stupid her parents are being, and Lily will be the only witch in the country not attending Hogwarts.)

On the off chance the parents still do send Lily, Tom probably doesn't do anything, but does offer to tutor during the holidays/summer. "I can totally get around that 'no magic' rule as an official instructor" which is actually true because the 'no magic' rule has hilariously terrible enforcement that's practically useless.

So, even if she goes (and she probably still will), the family/Lily certainly wouldn't say no to being able to practice magic over the summer and get ahead of her peers (as she's starting behind as a Muggle-born).

(Yes, eleven-year-old Severus hates Lily's stupid hot tutor that she doesn't even need/shouldn't have. He also hates that Lily increasingly notes that her stupid hot tutor is really smart and that they're covering material way outside the curriculum, and she thinks they're not actually learning much in Hogwarts in retrospect.)

Tom though would either halt his Voldemort activities completely (as there's a chance, he could accidentally blow-up future apprentice and he has all the time in the world anyway) or else make sure Lily is very very very far away from them. Given he'd need something of a double-life though, I imagine he'd put it on hold/not really start things up so that he, as Tom Riddle, can have come back from abroad to do this tutoring gig (and conveniently check back in with Alphard earlier).

I imagine this does end up with Tom getting more than one student to stay afloat, and he hates it so much.

#harry potter #the man who would be king #tom riddle #lily evans #meta #vinelle #therealvinelle

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deconstructthesoup · 20 days

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So, this is inspired by @tai-janai's new Slay the Poet AU, where LQ has to rescue the Narrator and is being guided by Shifty. I saw their idea post, and my brain demanded that I put my own spin on it, so... yeah. Go check out their AU, though, it's probably gonna be better than mine and it actually has drawings.

I've already typed out the overarching plot (tldr, Shifty's the player and LQ is the "guide," and Narry is a professor who's trapped in a library in an abandoned city), but here's what I think the Narrator's chapter 2 vessels would be like:

The Wizard: You get the Wizard if you don't go into the library's basement with the knife, you make the decision to free the Professor, and you resist when the Guide makes the desperate choice to take over your body (while repeatedly apologizing over and over in your mind). The Wizard is unflinchingly kind and has that classic Disney-fairytale whimsy about him, and will always encourage you no matter what you do---and is the only one who undoubtedly means you no harm. The voice you gain in your head is the Voice of the Apprentice, who believes that the Professor is a learned and wise soul who can teach us everything, and we must listen to him.

The Warlock: You get the Warlock if you don't go into the library's basement with the knife, make him think you're going to free him, and kill him---either via getting the knife or letting the Guide take you over and winning the ensuing struggle. The Warlock is a slightly draconic being who is devious and cunning, but very clearly bitter towards you, and there's no doubt that he's thirsting for revenge. The voice you gain in your head is the Voice of the Charming, who uses flattery and deceit to get her way, and encourages you to do the same to the Professor---after all, we did it once, and we can do it again, can't we?

The Creation: You get the Creation if you immediately kill the Professor, attempt to leave and fail (which causes the Guide to panic, saying that this wasn't how it was supposed to happen and he doesn't know what's wrong), and kill yourself once you see no other way out. The Creation is a stitched-up, reanimated corpse who somehow managed to bring himself back, and he's a lonely soul who just wants you to set him free. The voice you gain in your head is the Voice of the Restless, who's a listless and tired individual who's aching for things to change... and whether or not we choose to help the Professor or not is entirely up to us.

The Scientist: You get the Scientist if you go into the basement---either armed or unarmed---talk with him, and decide to just leave him there... except, if you do, he'll figure a way out, and he'll electrocute you with a single touch. The Scientist is every bit the sadistic mad genius, and while he knows full well that he needs you in order to get out, he sees no problem with torturing you if that's what it takes---and he's incredibly transparent about his desire to end you once he's finally free. The voice you gain in your head is the Voice of the Doll, who claims that she's not scared and that everything is fine, but is very bad at lying and is clearly shaken by everything the Professor does.

The Academic: You get the Academic if you go down into the basement with the knife, talk with him, attempt to kill him... and when he fights back, you submit. The Academic is self-absorbed, condescending, and controlling, believing himself to be superior to you in every way---and he soon proves that he's not just some entitled asshole, as he's able to take control of you with his words alone. The voice you gain in your head is the Voice of the Humbled, who is openly terrified of the Professor and sees no problem with just doing what he says.

The Archivist: You get the Archivist if you go down into the basement with the knife, decide to free him instead, and resist when the Guide takes you over. The Archivist, who is free from his chains but is unable to escape without your help, has nothing better to do other than to reorganize and catalog the books in the library, and has become incredibly cynical and emotionless as a result. The voice you gain in your head is the Voice of the Curious, who constantly asks questions and wants to look further into random things---something that at first seems irritating, but you eventually realize just how helpful she can be...

The Doctor: You get the Doctor if you go down into the basement with the knife, talk with him, attempt to kill him, and fight him until neither of you can fight anymore. The Doctor openly hates you and sees you as his only obstacle, and will engage you in combat whether you want to or not---and once you fight back, you discover that no matter how brutally you fight, he knows just how to set his organs back to normal, and he knows just how to wreck yours. The voice you gain in your head is the Voice of the Hateful, who wants nothing more than to crush the Professor to a pulp and make him suffer.

The Dragon: You get the Dragon if you go down into the basement without the knife, decide to free him, and don't resist when the Guide takes you over---though you do let the Professor win, in the end. The Dragon is the most beastlike and inhuman of the vessels, and all he wants is to devour you so that he may escape. The voice you gain in your head is the Voice of the Warrior, and she knows exactly how to fight him so that you can make it out of there alive... but be sure to listen to her, because ignoring her warnings could end very badly.

The Inventor: You get the Inventor if you either kill him immediately and check to see if he's dead, or if you question for one second whether or not he's armed... either way, you soon discover that you've brought a knife to a gunfight. The Inventor is cheerful yet murderous, and has several contraptions up his sleeves that are designed to end you---in all sorts of fun and exciting ways. The voice you gain in your head is the Voice of the Prepared, who's quick on her feet and can easily improvise ways to evade the Professor's onslaughts.

The Substitute: You get the Substitute if you avoid going to the library entirely, and instead choose to wander the city---resulting in the city reverting entirely to libraries. Because of this, the Substitute starts off as nothing more than a blank slate of a man, and gets more and more jumbled and confused the more you attempt to talk to him. The voice you gain in your head is the Voice of the Rebel, who doesn't really have a goal other than to just goof off and have fun---making choices for choice's sake.

And, uh... that's what I got!

#i couldn't NOT name one of the vessels “the archivist”#still unsure of how he got his “reflecting what you think of him” quality when he's still his very human self #maybe he got infected with some of shifty's nature? idk #slay the princess #slay the professor au #stp the narrator #the shifting mound

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