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princhii · 7 months

Text

↳ Feel It

bada lee x fem!reader

not proofread!

↳ cw!: 18+, dom!bada, drinking, use of weed, smut, use of strap, sub!reader, age gap (reader is of age, just refers bada as older woman!)

a/n: ahhh this is my first time ever writing anything so pls go easy on me yall 🫡 heavily inspired by the song ‘feel it’ by jacquees :] also lusher is referred to as both seoyoung and lusher! hope u enjoy also happy thanksgiving to those who celebrate ⭐️

“do you like the way it feels, mama?— shit, back that ass up on it just like that baby.”

and just like that, you were there. on her bed. ass up face down. how did you even get there again? oh yeah, that’s right.

the club.

———★✮꩜⋆

you were never really one to go out and party, let alone in a setting where you didn’t know your surroundings. yet, here you were, letting your bestfriend of five years, seoyoung, also known as lusher amongst everyone else— help you pick out an outfit for the night.

“oh, what about this? it’s…cute!”

“lush, i told you i want something casual. not an outfit that draws attention towards me.”

you rolled your eyes as your bestfriend kept begging you to please do it for her, just this once. and because you love her too much, and kind of wanted her to shut up, you decided to wear it. the rest of your evening was spent trying to get ready for a clubbing event your bestfriend got invited to. she’s known lots of people throughout all these years of being her bestfriend, yet you never really agreed to going to events like these with her. not because you were being rude, but because you genuinely just didn’t like that setting. it wasn’t really your ideal way of having ‘fun’. it also made you a little uneasy and a bit overwhelmed knowing lusher would probably get out of her way to show you off and introduce you to literally everyone she knew. and yes, that meant everyone.

that’s what you get for having a dancer as your bestfriend— even better, she’s in a crew.

of course, after five years of being very close, you knew about it all. you were there when it was announced she’d be on the second season of street woman fighter, and you were there when her crew ultimately won the show. you were also there when it came to her introducing you to her beloved crewmates. she was very affectionate and wanted her members to meet you personally. it was also an excuse to get to invite you to places with them, in which you did go— well, sometimes.

the rest of the crew grew fond of you and got used to your presence when you’d accompany them for rehearsals or just other activities. you yourself grew fond of the girls. except for one girl in particular. bada lee. you didn’t know what it was, but there was something about her that made you feel the most nervous around her. it could probably be because she was a bit older than everyone else, or it could be because of her carefree nonchalant aura, or it could also be the fact that she was so insanely attractive. and that’s something you for sure kept to yourself. you felt small around her anytime there’d be an interaction. like that one time you went back into their shared studio to grab your phone because you had left it in there.

you made your way back into the studio, heading towards the far right corner where you had left your phone. realizing you also left your charger, you quickly grabbed both. as far as you knew, it was just you in there. that was until you heard someone clear their throat rather loudly. as if they wanted you to know.

“ah, so that’s who’s phone it was.”

you froze. the all too familiar voice infiltrating your ears. you placed your missing items in your bag before turning around and making eye contact with the taller girl. she was standing by the doorway, keys in one hand and duffel bag in the other, assuming it was her dance bag. she gave you a small smile once you met each others gaze. it took everything in you to not audibly whimper at the sight. she was wearing her signature baggy sweats, some oversized shirt, and a cap to hold in her hair, a few strands loosely peeking through along with her bun. it was such a basic, casual outfit— but it had you melting. her attractive nature was something you were definitely not immune to.

“oh uh, yeah. was in a rush and must’ve forgotten it.” you awkwardly laughed, subconsciously gripping onto the straps of your bag for dear life.

bada glanced over at you before giving you a small nod and turning the main lights off.

“well, it’s a good thing i came back. otherwise i would’ve locked up and not notice someone being in here.” bada’s voice was kind, speaking to you very respectfully. truth be told, there was honestly no reason for you to be so nervous. but you were. you were very nervous around her. more nervous than the time you had to bail lusher out of jail, but that’s a story for a different time.

———★✮꩜⋆

“look, y/n, i promise you everything will be fine! just loosen up a little, it’s not a bad thing to have fun y’know?” lusher tried cheering you up, touching up her makeup in the backseat of the uber. you, on the other hand, were very anxious. in this moment you began to regret even coming.

“you know this isn’t even my thing. i just said yes because you promised me you’d do my laundry for a month…” and at that, your bestfriend laughed and lightly smacked your arm, gasping as she faked being offended.

the uber arrived at the infamous club lusher had been yapping about the entire drive there. you two stepped out before making way towards the entrance. it’s not like you were insecure about showing yourself off, you’re a very confident person actually! it’s just you hardly know anyone who’s attending and it’s the way your dress would tend to ride up with every step you took. lusher took your hand and gave it a light squeeze before sending you a smile as you both walked inside. the vibrations from the blaring speakers already reverberating against you, the reek of alcohol and other substances hitting your nose. you were quick to notice that lusher had immediately began greeting people, her hand still in yours as she tried to get you to engage and make conversation with a few people she knew. needless to say, it all went well. after a good thirty minutes of being dragged around and forced to interact with people, you were then led to the mini bar. you gave small waves and smiles as you saw some of the girls waiting for you and lusher to arrive.

“y/n, you look gorgeous!” kyma squealed, practically jumping out of the stool to wrap her arms around you and fawn over your outfit.

“that’s literally what i’ve been trying to tell her but she thinks it’s ‘too risqué‘, can you believe that?” your bestfriend laughed, some of the girls joining and trying to boost your confidence. and to all of their commotion, you said your thank you’s when accepting their compliments and attempts at bringing your confidence up.

eventually, you decided to indeed let loose, and ended up having a few drinks, a shot or two, and moved your body onto the dance floor with the girls. throughout the night you really did try your best to have fun and take advantage of it since it’s not something you go for. and it was working! you were genuinely having a good time. as you made your way back to the mini bar to grab another drink, the bartender working was quick to grab your attention.

“‘s been paid for, ready to drink.” was all he said before going back to attend other club goers. you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion before grabbing the drink the bartender had referred to. obviously skeptical, you eyed the glass. hell, you even sniffed the drink, because you know, you never know! after observing the glass full of alcohol you decided to down it. tonight you were letting loose, remember? might as well go all in. your face became flushed and slowly but surely, all the drinks were making their way back to hit you.

“didn’t really take you as a drinker so i had to see for myself, pretty.”

once again, you froze. only this time, you could feel the older woman’s breath down against your neck as she leaned into your ear, causing you to shudder whilst her velvety voice rang through your ears. bada always had a habit of just appearing out of nowhere— at least, that’s what it seemed like. turning around to face the taller girl, who was a little too close, you forced a half assed grin and gave her a small ‘thank you’ for the drink. you discreetly held your breath as best as you could, she was seriously standing close. her gaze slowly dropped down your body, confidently checking you out. a small chuckle left the dancer’s lips before backing away realizing she was indeed, way too close. you cleared your throat, trying to ease the tension and act normal— whatever that is.

“you looked like you were having fun just a while ago, why so quiet?”

oh i don’t know maybe the fact that you bought me a drink and proceeded to call me pretty then just happened to stand right in front of my face, i don’t know.

you thought to yourself, letting out a soft frustrated sigh, you rolled your eyes at the girl and turned back around getting yourself ready to order yet another shot because clearly you were not loose enough if you still managed to get this tense around bada even while being tipsy. before you could even open your mouth to order, a hand grabbed your shoulder, pulling you back slightly. whymewhymewhymewhyme, you cursed at yourself, gritting your teeth behind closed lips.

“slow down, you’ve drank quite a bit i saw you. let’s go with the others, yeah?” her hand trailed down your arm, leaving goosebumps across your skin, grabbing your hand. “i don’t normally condone this but,” she continued. “minah and tatter recently got new stuff, c’mon.” and with that you found yourself getting dragged to a far corner to a lounge room of some sort, some of the girls already sitting there. excited squeals and claps were given once you and bada walked in to join, taking seats with them. you groaned when you realized what the girls were doing, then groaned even louder when lusher blew a cloud directly into your face followed by a fit of giggles. tatter looked over at you, handing you the freshly rolled joint you assumed she just made not even minutes ago. bada nudged your arm, giving you a small nod and encouraging you to take it. you knew some of the girls would smoke every here and there. you even smoked occasionally with lusher some nights. it’s not like you’ve never smoked, you just didn’t want to deal with the consequences of your own actions the morning after. ultimately accepting tatter’s offer, you grabbed the joint and let minah light it up for you. you placed the joint in between your lips and inhaled deeply, taking in as much as you could despite already being somewhat drunk. exhaling, you blew out the smoke towards the ceiling, throwing your head back and smiling to yourself. you took another generous hit then handed it over to minah.

“what?” your voice cracked slightly as you coughed, bada glaring at you.

then she smirked.

then her eyes darkened.

then her tongue swiped across her puffy lips.

oh god.

———★✮꩜⋆

bada’s grip on your hips grew tighter, forcefully pushing you against the wall. your fingers lost in her striped colored hair. the kiss was filled with nothing but pure sin. her tongue hungrily exploring the inside of your mouth, she’d occasionally pull her tongue away to suck on yours. bada pulled away, giving you both time to catch your breaths. she looked down at you, her thumbs rubbing circles against your hips.

“ever since seoyoung introduced us to you, i’ve been dreaming of this.” she huffed out, grabbing you by the chin. “you’re so fucking bad.” her thumb lightly grazing your bottom lip. looking up, you caught her biting her lip as she focused looking down at you and scanning your body in a now disheveled dress. bada’s hand’s slowly trailed down your sides, then down to the hem of your dress that was now hiked up even more. she let it sit up above your hips. you felt her lean into you, her large hands going back to firmly grip your hips, only this time she placed her leg in between yours, pulling you down against her thigh.

“fuck, you’re so pretty…” her voice sent chills down your spine, she sounded so sexy.

“follow me.”

and you did. she opened the door to her master bedroom and let you walk in first. before even having any time to observe the older woman’s room, you felt her arms wrap around you from behind, her face buried into your neck. she placed small kisses across your neck until she got comfortable enough to start biting and sucking. your breathing grew shaky, whimpering ever so slightly at the attention bada gave your neck attentively. although this was not the time to think about it, you were definitely not excited to have to explain to lusher why you and bada left together so secretively.

“bed, now.”

you snapped out of your thoughts once you heard bada’s voice and felt her breath against your ear. she guided you over to her bed, laying you down gently, contrary to the way she was just being rough with you. bada swiftly helped you out of your dress before leaning back slightly to take in your now exposed figure. she smirked to herself before tugging her bottom lip in between her teeth, glaring back over at you. you felt a familiar heat pool in your lower stomach, quickly reacting and crossing your legs. the striped haired girl snarled and forced your legs back open as she placed her large hands on your thighs, forcefully separating them.

“don’t get all shy on me now. i see the way you stare at me, god, you really thought i wouldn’t notice?”

her hands slowly caressed your inner thighs. a low groan escaped her lips.

“and now you’re making a mess on my new sheets.”

you bit your lip trying to hold back your whimpers. you couldn’t help but drip at the way bada spoke to you, the way she teased you by grabbing on your thighs, just shy away from your heat. a surprised yelp was let out as you felt bada pull you just towards the edge of her bed. she knelt down and propped one of your legs up on her shoulder. the older woman lightly blew against your wet core, the cool sensation causing you to moan and involuntarily buck your hips towards her.

“such a needy little thing.” bada teased you, placing a small kiss against your inner thigh.

“tell me what you want, princess.”

her long slender fingers softly tracing just the outside of your folds, teasing you when she lightly brushed over your now wet cunt. you felt your heart beating out of your chest as your breathing grew heavier, shakier.

you looked down at bada while she peered up at you from in between your legs. unfortunately you couldn’t hold back any longer and the sight alone was enough to make you throw your head back and let out a desperate whine. bada laughed at you, her laughter bouncing off the walls.

“i’m gonna make you feel it, mama.”

she got up from between your legs and leaned into you, placing a soft kiss against your temple.

“make me feel like you ain’t ever had it..” she huffed out lowly into your ear, nibbling softly against your earlobe. you heard a light ringing in your ears as you started to feel dizzy. her weight on top of yours, one of her hands still groping and caressing your thigh while her other hand was trailing up and down your side, nails slightly scratching at you. wet sloppy kisses were scattered all around your neck, bada making sure to mark every spot her lips connected to. definitely was not going to be fun explaining why you have so many hickeys along your neck.

“b-bada wait—“ you pushed her away gently, her face hovering above yours. she furrowed her eyebrows at your sudden movements.

you looked away shyly, turning your head to the side. a low chuckle erupted from the older woman, it was like poison.

“haven’t even started giving you what you need and you already wanna run from it, baby?” bada teased, pressing her hand down against your lower stomach with slight pressure. you instinctively let out a rather loud moan, arching your back into her touch. she took this as her sign to keep going, lowering her face down to your chest this time. her warm tongue swirling around one of your nipples, her free hand pinching and rolling the other. you let out quiet curses and whimpers as she got to work. and, yes, she marked you there too. after a few minutes, bada pulled away and looked down at your chest, contently humming to herself as she saw the bruises forming across your chest, on your boobs themselves, and right underneath. she came back to lean in for another kiss.

her tongue almost immediately forcing itself into your mouth. loud wet noises from the kiss were all that could be heard in the room. her hands freely roaming across your body, groping you hungrily. you let out moans into the girl’s mouth, your arms snaking their way to wrap around her. you bit her bottom lip, tugging on it slightly in between your teeth. your eyes fluttered opened to look up at bada, her lip still in between your teeth as you pulled it slightly, never breaking eye contact. you felt her grip tighten on your waist, her thumbs dipping into your sides roughly.

“fuck…” she groaned as you released her bottom lip, now becoming slightly swollen. giving you a light peck against your temple once more, she went back down to kneel in front of you. repeating her previous movements and propping your leg up against her shoulder.

“seoyoung never mentioned anything about you being a slut.” bada chuckled, her index finger lightly, so painfully lightly, tapped on your throbbing clit. your hips naturally bucking up to gain more friction. the girl continued doing this until she herself grew impatient.

“be good and take it all for me, yeah baby? be a good girl for me?”

you whined shamelessly, nodding your head and babbling incoherently. bada smirked, assuming that was your way of agreeing with her. she peeked up at you from between your legs, giving your thighs a light squeeze before peppering soft kisses just on the outside of your heat. a loud cry rippled through the bedroom walls as you felt her tongue lick a long strip against your folds, hands immediately darting down to grip onto her hair, your chest shakily rising and falling. her tongue dangerously, and skillfully, working its way into your wet cunt. you felt pressure being applied to your clit which caused you to choke out a moan, your fists now full of her colored hair. her thumb rubbed circles across your clit, applying pressure as her tongue continued to work its way into your core, going as deep as she could. strings of babbled whimpers and curses escaped your lips as the girl kept working her way into you. bada’s lips locked around your aching clit, teeth lightly grazing on the bundle of nerves with every suck she gave. tugging on her hair, you tried pulling her in even closer. until you felt two long digits scissoring their way inside of your sopping cunt.

“h-hey slow down—“ your barely coherent sentence was cut off by a loud moan, feeling her fingers curl up inside of you as she gave a particularly strong suck on your clit. you felt her moaning into your pussy, causing the vibrations to make you weaker, needier.

“ ‘m gonna cum..” you whimpered out, your hands moving to grip the sheets, bucking your hips into the older girl’s mouth.

taking note of this, bada completely removed herself, now hovering over you once again. you mewled out at her, begging her to go back and finish what she had started. in swift movements, she removed her top along with her bra. you gawked at her, eyes lighting up at her exposed upper half. she smirked at you, lowering her face into the crook of your neck. she gave small kisses this time, they were sweet and playful.

you could hear sounds of rustling fabric, you craned your neck to the side and tried to look down at both of your bodies. her pants now disheveled and tossed elsewhere. but that wasn’t it. your eyes practically bulged out once you noticed she was already wearing a harness with a very large toy attached to it.

“like what you see, princess?” bada chuckled, her lips kissing all over your jawline. her large hands roaming your body once more, groping you with desire and the need for more.

“you know, when i found out you were coming with seoyoung,” she gently and carefully sat you up before flipping you over. your stomach now on the bed and your face resting against one of her soft pillows.

“i just knew i had to wear this.” she teased, her hair brushing up against your skin as she leaned to whisper in your ear. snaking one of her hands to the front of your neck as the other one stroked her strap, playfully rubbing the head against your wet folds. you opened your mouth to say something but ultimately failed doing so. the only thing coming out of your mouth being whines and weak attempts at begging. her hands roamed down your back before stopping right above your ass. she slowly trailed her hands down lower before forcefully groping your ass and letting out a guttural groan.

“such a nice ass you have , baby, fuckkk.” bada bit her lip, leaning back and smacking your ass, cursing under her breath as she watched the way it jiggled. you cried out as you felt her hand forcefully smacking your lower half. you managed to lift your head up slightly and turn around, looking back at bada. her eyes were dark and heavy, wet tongue licking her lips, her gaze never leaving the sight of your ass. you suddenly had an idea.

keeping your sight on her, you lifted your hips up, now supporting yourself on your knees. you kept the upper half of your body pressed nicely against the bed. your position was nothing short from slutty. your back creating a perfect arch as your ass was fully on display for the older woman right behind you. heavy breathing was emitting from bada, her hands now holding onto your hips as she slowly and teasingly rubbed her silicone cock across your folds. over and over and over again. you moaned desperately, grinding back against bada, wanting to feel more of it. you heard bada mutter a few curses before feeling the tip of her strap peeking it’s way into your heat. you couldn’t help but let out an almost pornographic moan while you felt her forcing just the head of her strap inside of you. to say it was big was an understatement. it was huge. the tip of her cock alone was enough to make your eyes water. another whine from you was let out when you felt her hand smack your ass once more.

you grabbed fistfuls of the sheets just beneath you, trying to pull yourself up. it all failed once you heard bada growl lowly, forcing your hips backwards which caused you to take in her entire length.

you cried out loudly, giving in and letting your tears fall freely. bada laughed quietly at your given state. but she’d be lying if she said she didn’t want to absolutely ruin you right here right now. she gently started to pull out but was quickly stopped once your hand went back to grab hers.

“don’t take it out…please d-“

bada didn’t need you to tell her twice.

she shoved her strap all the way in one sharp thrust, her nails digging into your hips. you moaned her name out, your face falling directly into her pillow. she gave a few shallow thrusts, wanting to give you at least some time to adjust to her length. regardless, you kept whining underneath her, begging for more.

bada didn’t give you what you wanted. so naturally you decided to do what you thought was best.

you took the initiative and started rolling your hips back, shamelessly fucking yourself on her strap. you kept rocking back, wanting to feel every inch burying inside of your cunt. bada couldn’t help but let out a rather loud moan at the sight, her eyebrows furrowing while her face contorted into one of pleasure. her arm draped across your back before her hand grabbed a fistful of your hair, forcing your face back down on her pillow, your cheek pressing up against it.

“do you like the way it feels, mama?— shit, back that ass up on it just like that baby.” bada talked you through it as you kept fucking yourself onto the silicone cock attached to the older woman, her own clit becoming even more sensitive from the friction. she groaned right beside your ear once she lowered herself and hovered above you.

“so so so fucking pretty and good for me.”

she forced your entire body back down so you laid flatly across her bed. her strap coming out of your now painfully aching pussy. it’s not that it was actually painful anymore, it was the fact that she removed herself when all you wanted was to take her inside repeatedly until it became too much. and even then, you’d still want even more. your little crush on the older woman now becoming complete lust and desire, you wanted her more than anything ever right now.

and as if she could read your mind, she was giving you exactly what you wanted.

she placed her knees on either side of your body, her long legs slightly draping over your smaller ones. she pressed her body completely on top of yours. you could feel how hard her nipples were as they brushed against your back. bada grabbed her strap before aligning it directly in front of your heat. she let out a needy groan before shoving it all inside, chuckling slightly to herself when she heard you whining. her hands smoothing down your back and on your sides.

“so fucking pretty.”

bada huffed out in between each rough thrust, loving the way you cried her name out. you gripped onto the sheets once again, practically screaming into the pillow. your vision became blurred from the tears, your mouth biting down onto the pillow. bada did not like that one bit. grabbing your hair, she yanked you up towards her, your back pressing against her front perfectly. from this new angle, you could feel her thrusting even deeper. throwing your head back, you rested your head against her chest, her long arms wrapping your smaller figure. you choked out moans, your mind growing fuzzy. but god it felt so damn good.

“jesus christ, y/n you’re so hot. god you take me so well, don’t you? you like that?” she teased, biting down on your shoulder. she picked up her pace, thrusting faster, deeper. her hand trailed down to your lower stomach, pressing down.

“you feel that, princess? be good and tell me how good it feels, y/n.”

you turned your head slightly to look up at her, well, at least try to. you opened your mouth to respond but only managed to moan erotically, her hand still pressing down.

“feels so g-good— bada please!” you wailed out, reaching down to rub your neglected clit. you shut your eyes closed, letting the overwhelming waves of pleasure take over your entire body completely. bada smacked your hand away, not being too happy at your movements. instead, she replaced your hand with hers. her long fingers rubbing your bundle of nerves while she kept fucking into you.

you gasped for air as your legs started to tremble, your thighs growing weak. bada could tell just how close you were, and she was enjoying ever second of it.

“mmm, ‘m cumming bada i’m—“

once again, she pulled out completely. in which you let out a frustrated groan, lightly smacking bada’s arm.

“wanna taste you.” she whispered to you, kissing your cheek softly before taking the strap off and tossing it to the side. she turned over and laid on the bed, taking your hand and pulling you towards her.

“sit on my face baby, want you to finish here.” she pointed to her mouth, giving you her signature smirk as she winked at you. hesitantly, but still obeying, you climbed over on top of her until you hovered just a few inches above her face, not wanting to fully sit. you felt her kiss your inner thigh before she wrapped her arms around your thighs and forced you to sit on her face fully. immediately her tongue darted out, prying inside your heat. your eyes rolled back as you leaned over to hold yourself up, grabbing onto the headboard. her nails digging into your thighs as she devoured you. your hips started rolling frantically against her face, the top of her nose brushing against your clit repeatedly.

“o-oh my god yes…bada fuck please.” your grinding grew erratic, you felt yourself nearing your much needed orgasm.

you felt her voice vibrating through your cunt, but couldn’t make out what she was trying to say as she never once separated her tongue from working its way into you. her hand reached up to rub your clit, licking and sucking like her life depended on it.

she’s too proud to admit it, but she was getting off to this. her own hips needily bucking into the air with ever moan of her name you gave out, with every cry and whine, with ever lick she gave your cunt. and god was it her favorite.

all it took was one final lick and rub on your clit before you felt yourself coming completely undone. your body shook above bada, your thighs trembling against her head. you leaned forward to rest your forehead against the headboard, letting out continuous moans and wailing out bada’s name. the dancer lapped up the mess you made, helping you ride out your orgasm until she felt you stop shaking and recollecting yourself. her arms extended out to help you off of her. you managed to make yourself comfortable and laid next to the older woman, your breathing still heavy as well as hers. bada brushed some of the hairs out of your face, some of them sticking to your forehead due to the sweat. she kissed your nose and poked at it, giggling at your dazed state.

‘she just fucked me stupid and now she’s acting all cute, how is that even possible?’ you thought to yourself as you looked at her with admiring eyes.

“you did so well, princess.” she praised you, stroking your hair. all you could do was give her a small smile and lean into her touch. you scooted closer to her, burying your face into her chest. her heartbeat was still pretty fast. she wrapped her arms around you trying to pull you in even closer. she peppered kisses onto your head, whispering sweet praises to you. you felt your face heat up all over again as you grew nervous. which is very ironic given the fact that you had just been fucked by bada. you removed yourself from her chest to look up at her only to find her already locking her eyes with yours. you couldn’t help but laugh softly. she was so beautiful. her lips curled into a smile. before you knew it, your lips locked and soon grew to be a playful yet passionate kiss. you cupped her face with one of your hands, your thumb caressing her cheek. her teeth lightly nibbled on your bottom lip.

the sound of a loud ringtone could be heard coming from the living room. you smiled into the kiss before pulling away and kissing the corner of her lips.

“it’s my phone, let me go ch—“ you were cut off by bada pulling you back down.

“we’re not finished.”

just like that, bada had you pinned down once again.

———★✮꩜⋆

“ugh, why won’t she pick up the damn phone?” lusher sighed and threw her phone onto the couch.

“i’m sure y/n is fine! i saw her leaving with bada. actually, me and kyma saw them leave together.” minah perked up, trying to comfort a worried lusher.

“dude…they’re probably fucking..” tatter joked, trying to stifle a laugh.

lusher’s eyes widened at the thought, quickly shaking her head and trying to erase the image from her head.

“oh my god! they’re so fucking.”

#Spotify #bada lee #bada lee x reader #swf2 #swf2 x reader #bada lee smut #bada lee x fem reader #street woman fighter 2 #oh my god i need her #bada lee one chance #bada

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lxclerc · 10 months

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𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 | 𝐝𝐫𝟑

summary... it’s never the right time for you and daniel, always something pulling the two of you away from each other. requested... yes by literally everyone. yall were coming at me with pitch forks for this warning... age gap (7 years), emotional cheating, physical cheating, angst, angst, angst, light smut (more on fade to black) pairing... daniel ricciardo x horner! reader

note... i am tagging each and everyone of you who asked for a part 2 bc this fic has quite literally loomed over my head ever since i posted it a year ago. literally everytime i open this godforsaken app, someone is offering me their first born for the part 2 so yall better give me all the notes!!!

𝙢𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩

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high tide came and brought you in

“if you could go anywhere in the world right now, where would you go?”

the question caught you off guard as your friend drunkenly pondered over it out loud. where would you go? you were sober enough to say home, the most acceptable answer that would not invite any other follow up questions. it’s simple and doesn't need a discussion. the reason it caught you off guard wasn’t just that though but because your answer was instantaneous in your head. your answer isn’t a where but rather a who, came your bitter realization.

and you knew that if you could go anywhere in the world right now, it’d be him you’d go to. he always lingers in the back of your mind, everything that reminded him of you tends to bring a certain kind of aching and longing you’ve grown to resent over the months and years spent without him.

daniel sent you away and deep in you, you know he meant good. he’d done a selfless thing, loving you and setting you free. but missing him was unbearable, loving him all consuming and you resent him for doing this to you. you resent the world for making you fall for a man without letting you have him.

still, you did as he told you. you went back to school, pursuing a career in a field you knew he’d be proud of, achieving your dreams and living your life as though a part of you hadn’t been left with him.

your friends carry on with the party. half of university was partying which is a scene familiar to you. this time, it’s on the beach, the salty air and sound of crashing waves echoing with the sound of the music and chatter. still though, you can’t help but scan the place as though looking for him among the crowd of people the same way you always would. you miss the way you’d find his eyes already on you, pools of brown dripping like honey on your skin.

but he’s never there and you feel dirty whenever another man looks at you, their gazes too eager as they look at you as though you’re a piece of meat, never gentle like his as though you’re aphrodite herself walking among mere mortals.

you miss him is the ugly truth. you miss him so fucking terribly it makes you angry. you don’t want to miss him. you no longer want to love him. loving him hurts, as though he’s clawing at your chest and squeezing your heart together in a sick sort of torture.

but even before he touched you, you were his. all he had to do was look at you. you exist in two places – here and wherever he is.

eventually as the night progresses on, you move away from the party. you’re in some fancy country club and the tile is expensive on your feet as you step out of your heels and walked towards the beach, feeling the cool sand against your skin.

in hindsight, you really shouldn’t have been surprised to find him in a place like this but despite looking for him wherever you go, you’d never expect to find him. searching for him has become a comfort the same way longing for him has – in a sick, twisted and painful way.

but he’s here now and in the one time you hadn’t searched for him, he found you. the moment you’d spotted his figure looking out at sea, he turned to you as though a gravitational pull connected you to him.

one year, three months and fourteen days. that was the last time you saw him but he looked no different from the man who’d brought you back to your hotel room only to say goodbye.

and then he smiled and it was as though the sun shone on you again.

“honey,” he says and your heart trembles.

daniel.

it was too early. and you’re drunk and you aren’t entirely sure if you were dreaming or not.

but he stands before you, eyes of brown looking as though you’re aphrodite herself and he can’t quite believe he gets to stand before you. eyes of brown that seem to be sobbing without tears. daniel.

you’re still not talking and he’s letting you, watching you so intently as though he’s memorizing your face. he looked the exact same but you know what he must be seeing. you look nothing like the woman he left behind. you’d cut your hair short and dyed it. long gone were your summer dress, replaced by tight fitting ones that showed off your body. you feel different and you tried so hard to make sure you wouldn’t recognize yourself in the mirror. you hated seeing the woman who couldn’t make him stay.

but in his eyes, you see your reflection and you recognize her well.

“daniel,” you muttered as the crashing waves touched your feet. would you love me now? you wanted to ask.

he smiled again. “you look beautiful as you always are.”

please touch me, you wanted to beg. soft eyes and soft soft hands. you’re lonely without him.

you manage a grin. “sure, old man.”

the laugh that he let out echoed against your soul. “i’m being honest.”

you missed him. god, you missed him so fucking much.

but daniel still would not let himself love you. not yet, not now that you’re finally building something for yourself. you have friends and have set goals. not yet.

“y/n!” someone calls from behind you but you’re hesitant to take your eyes off of daniel, terrified he’d become a figment of your imagination the moment you do. but your friend's familiar calls force you to. “come on, we have to go.”

you ignore her, turning back to daniel and he smiles at you, offering his hand for you to shake. this is the best he can offer for now. “i’ll see you around, kid.”

you wanted to cry, wanted to scream that it’s so unfair, but you smile sadly as he shook his hand, his calloused fingers so familiar against yours.

“in a few years,” you say.

and as the ocean brought him back to you, the waves must return to the sea.

but you were still gone and gone, gone and gone

the next time you see daniel again, you were twenty four. you’re in your last year of university, applying for your doctorate. you loved academia, you loved your two cats and your little apartment downtown, you loved science and the galaxy it holds and you eventually realized that this is why he let you go. he wanted you to have this — be more than someone who just follows a man around country after country.

he wanted you to grow, wanted you to find the things you really loved without influence from him. he wanted you to find your independence and learn to stand on your own two feet.

max brought you here. it’s his first world champion and as his self proclaimed best friend, he refused to allow you to skip this one and so you pulled up your big girl pants and got on with it, arriving in abu dhabi on friday.

by some cruel twist of fate, he’s the first person you find the moment you enter the paddock. it would have been rude to ignore him and so you smile even though you can clearly see the woman next to him and the way she stands close.

goddamn it.

it hurt. it hurt seeing her there. it hurt seeing her cluelessly smile at you. the way he looks at you now, eyes of brown full of silent apologies, looking as though he wanted to reach over and touch you, to comfort you.

you release a shaky breathe, raising your hand in an pathetic attempt of a wave before you walk past him. you aren’t the same young kid like before. now, you have enough self reservation to not actively put yourself in a situation that would only hurt you. you don’t need to play besties with daniel’s new girlfriend.

the moment you enter the red bull motorhome, you hit max at the back of his head.

“what?” he exclaimed as you glared at him.

“you’re an idiot,” was all you said before moving towards your father. you’d ignore daniel and his girlfriend. you’re here to support max – even if he is a stupid idiot – and there’s no need for you to obsess over daniel.

but of course, you still do anyway. even as you watch the race, you’re watching him. he looks good, amazing, fucking edible. he looks like he stepped right out of your dirtiest dreams, all thick neck and stable arms. he looks beautiful, absolutely gorgeous and breathtaking and you selfishly want him just for you. but you’ve always wanted that and you’ve never been allowed to have him.

and then you’re watching her. she’s grace herself, really. she’s exactly the kind of woman he needed and you wonder if she knows about you and then you wonder what it is about her. what is it about her that made it so that daniel thought she’s good enough for him to love when he never could you?

“mate, it’s getting creepy,” max said as he took the seat before you. he looks tired but he looks determined and the way the hair falls over his face makes you smile. max is a very special person to you and you know that he always will. you hold him close to your heart and you know you’d move the earth for him.

you reach over, fixing the collar of his red bull shirt. “shut up.”

“her name’s caroline,” max says. “if you want to get to know her then just approach her.”

you glared at him. you don’t want to know her name. you don’t want to know what her laugh sounds like or the color of her eyes. you don’t want to know what made daniel fall in love with her. you don’t want to know her.

“shut up,” you say again. “i’m still blaming you.”

max laughed and you think him annoying you might just be his way of distracting himself from the race so you let him. you let him talk on and on and on the entire time till he’s needed back in the motorhome. you let him steal yur ice cream and tap your nose.

but when you turned back to her, caroline, you find him staring right back at you, anger and jealousy in those brown eyes you missed so much.

and it was like you’re twenty again, petty and young as you glared right back at him. he had no reason to be jealous when he has her beside him. he has no right to be jealous when he’s the one who’s never allowed the two of you to be more.

these hands had to let it go free

that night, he called you for the first time in three years. his name lit up your phone and your hand shook as you picked it up. his picture, smiling up at you taken at your twentieth birthday stares right back at you.

“daniel,” you breathe out as you press the phone against your ear. you’d arrived back in your hotel room two hours ago smelling of champagne and victory. max’s world championship trophy is laying next to you after being forgotten because your best friend was far too drunk to grab it before his girlfriend dragged him out. throughout the party, you avoided daniel like the plague, keeping to your side of the room and never straying towards him.

“i missed you,” he says from the other end, voice cracking and slurring. he’s drunk and you push back the blanket as you enter the bathroom, hand gripping your phone. “but fuck it, i don’t miss this.”

“what are you saying?”

“he’s my best mate, y/n.” there goes your name. not sweetheart or honey. he says your name like it’s sacred, something he’s only ever allowed to say when he’s at his most vulnerable, completely raw and baring his soul to you. “and i wanted to fucking punch his face the entire night.”

you close your eyes. this is familiar to you. daniel and his raw honesty when he’s drunk. daniel and his jealousy of max. this is all so familiar to you that you feel twenty again. you feel young and out of control and so drunk in love with a man you can’t have that it physically hurts. he’s ripped you off the past few years where you’ve grown into yourself. you’re twenty again and so tragically in love.

“i wanted to punch his fucking face because his touching you, because i’m not allowed to touch you,” he continues as you sink to the floor.

“you’re the only one who’s never let yourself touch me, daniel,” you whispered on the phone, broken down from one phone call.

he laughs bitterly and you might as well not have said anything. “and here i am, can’t even sleep next to my damn girlfriend because i keep thinking of you. it’s so unfair.”

you wanted to laugh too. unfair? how does he get to talk about unfair when he’d been the one to create this mess for the two of you? how dare he talk about being unfair when he’s the one who’s with another girl? this is unfair. it’s unfair to you. he doesn’t deserve to talk about it being unfair.

the night he left you in your hotel room on your twenty first birthday, you’d called his name again and again like a child. you hoped by some magical thing that he’ll appear. you were desperate.

“you shouldn’t have come back,” he says. “not yet. we both weren’t ready.”

you wipe the tears falling to your cheeks. “and when will that happen? when will we be ready? maybe it’s time to accept that it isn’t us.”

you heard him let out a shaky breath. “don’t say that. don’t say it.”

“i’m so tired of waiting. if it wasn’t us then and it isn’t us now, why do we still believe that it’s us someday?”

“ask me to stay,” he whispers. “ask me to stay and i will. ask me to drop her and i will. i will drop everything if you ask me to.”

you cry, pulling your knees against your chest. “goodbye, dan.”

struggled through the night with someone new

the next time you see daniel again, you invited him. you’re twenty five, it’s two thousand and twenty two, you’re engaged and you’d gotten arrogant.

you met your fiance, james, in university. you’re in the same program and the same friend group though you never paid much attention to him. for the most part, you never really paid much attention to anyone. six months later and he asked you on a date, one you’d declined without a second thought. it didn’t matter how many guys asked you out, you always declined, daniel in the back of your mind always reminding you of what you’re truly waiting for.

but james never treated you any differently. he never made it awkward and never put you on the spot. for the most part, you both acted like it never happened. but you applied to the same doctorate program and coincidentally ended up in apartments right next to each other. he was a comfort, a friend you already knew that you could rely on. he never made anymore advances towards you but it was inevitable to grow closer.

he’s stability and curiosity. he never once pulled back whenever you touched him or apologized for liking you. it was a breath of fresh air – to be admired so freely. you did your thesis together, hands tightly clamped together as you defended it.

you were the one to ask james out on a date, knowing he wouldn’t again in fear of making you uncomfortable. and after leaning on each other as friends for so long, transitioning to become lovers was so easy, you didn’t have to worry what anyone would say or think of you. you didn’t have to worry what your family would think. everything was easy with him.

james was so different from the type of love you were used to. you could love him without guilt, without pain and longing. you could love him simply, easily. you didn’t need to ask him to love you back, didn’t need to wonder if he’d still love you tomorrow. it was so easy being with him and you’d gotten lazy. waiting and hurting and crying for daniel was exhausting.

you wanted a love you didn’t have to fight for.

you’ve convinced yourself that you no longer felt anything for daniel, gaslighting yourself into believing that you’d close that chapter and left it in the past. you can move on now. there was no need for you constantly being miserable and lonely waiting for him to be ready.

and yet here you were, your fiance’s arm around you as you stare at the front door. you shouldn’t have invited him. there was no reason for you to do so but you wanted to prove yourself. you wanted to prove to yourself that he no longer affected you. daniel is in the past and you’ve told yourself repeatedly that you’ve let him go but now you wanted to show yourself that you have.

if you’re lucky, maybe he wouldn’t attend at all.

“are you okay, love?” james whispered against your ear, having noticed your stiff posture. you spent weeks planning your engagement party, stressing over the smallest details but now you don’t seem to be enjoying yourself.

you loved this about him – the way he’s able to read you like an open book. james knows there was someone before him – someone who’d left you broken and torn apart. he just didn’t know that person would be attending today.

you nod, taking a sip from the champagne glass you’d been holding as an excuse to stop your hands from fidgeting. “just a bit nervous from the crowd.”

“don’t worry too much. it’s just friends and family.” he gives you an assuring smile, accepting your reasoning as he pulls you closer towards him to try and comfort you.

you’re an idiot, the biggest one there is. max told you himself after you told him that you sent the invite to daniel. you’re a massive idiot and you’re in denial and you set your own trap, tempting yourself when there was no need to and now you were going to hurt james because the moment daniel entered the room, your breath was knocked out of you, heart beating furiously as though it recognized him.

it was daniel. how can you be so stupid?

his eyes meets yours and you missed the way those eyes of brown settle on your skin, grazing as though his soul was touching yours. but they’re sad this time – sad and exhausted and defeated and you can practically hear the way your heart shatters. it was daniel. it has always been daniel. it will always be daniel. how stupid were you to think otherwise? how stupid were you to believe you could ever forgot the way your heart and soul roars back to life the moment he enters the room.

you’ll break james’ heart, you’re breaking your own and you’ve broken his.

the entire time, you and james had stood before the door, greeting all of your guests and showing them where they can wait. you absolutely had no plans to greet daniel. it was bad enough that he was here, but james, sweet sweet james, who had no idea what he was doing dragging you towards the formula one driver, hadn’t gotten the memo.

he didn’t know that having daniel’s eyes on you so close would set wildfires in your stomach and he didn’t know how exhausting and difficult it was to contain those wildfires. he didn’t know that he was burning himself as he all but dragged you in front of him.

“hey,” your fiance says cluelessly. “daniel ricciardo!”

daniel is looking at you and you feel frozen under his gaze. it’s heavy. he makes you feel heavy, like you were cheating on james simply by looking at you. you feel nauseous but with guilt eating up at every cell in your stomach. but you shouldn’t feel guilty. he had no right to make you feel guilty for moving on. he moved on. last you him, he had a girlfriend. why aren’t you allowed to do the same? why can’t you go on with your life and build a future with a nice man that isn’t him?

“i’m a big fan,” james says cheerfully, offering his hand for daniel to shake and forcing him to tear his gaze away from you.

daniel forces a smile to his face, moving to shake his hand and you know this is the part where you’re supposed to introduce him. daniel is your guest after all and so you clear your throat, hoping your smile isn’t as stiff as you feel like it is.

“james, this is my friend daniel. daniel, my fiance james.” you manage to let out, gripping your champagne glass to avoid having to touch either of them the same way you avoid the way daniel’s eyes hardened when the word fiance tumbled from your lips.

“it’s really nice to meet you, mate,” james says with a massive smile. god he’s so nice and sweet and you hate what you’re doing to him.

daniel says nothing, only smiling and you end this entire interaction the moment you get a chance to. pointing at the snacks table, you turned to him. “there’s food over there and max is around here somewhere. nice seeing you again, daniel.”

you were lying through your goddamn teeth. thankfully, he seems to have taken the hint, walking away without saying another word.

the entire night, you feel his eyes on you. even as james makes his speech declaring his love for you, daniel stares at you with hooded eyes. he looks pissed and sad at the same time and you wanted to scream. stop looking at me! you couldn’t take anymore of this. he’s looking at you as though you’re under a microscope – staring into your soul like he could reach you there.

you’re an idiot and now that he’s in the same room as you are, the illusion has left you. you’re not over daniel because you can never be over him. he’s engraved in your soul, his fingerprints all over your heart. he was, and still is, the sun that made your universe turn. you’re choking and you needed to get away lest you burst.

daniel is overwhelming. he’s terrifying and addicting and you hate him but you’re madly in love with him. and worse of all, you’ll spend the rest of your life being in love with him. you’ll spend the rest of your life wanting him and hurting for him and and longing for him and that’s a goddamn fucking tragedy.

you manage to get through the party, practically dissociating yourself. eventually the guests leave one by one, only your family and closest friends left. you sit on the foyer with max, the dutchman watching you drink champagne straight out of the bottle.

“you shouldn’t have invited him,” he tells you quietly. “you were fucking yourself over.”

you roll your eyes. you stare inside the house where daniel is talking to your father. your dad offered his home for your engagement party. you know he likes james. your mother too and your little siblings can’t get enough of him. that fact almost makes you want to throw up.

“i thought i was over him,” you say.

it’s max’s turn to roll his eyes. “you’re just a good liar. you’ll never be over daniel and he’ll never be over you. even i know that.”

you glared at him. you already know what he’s telling you and quite frankly, you had no desire to hear it again. “i hate you.”

“neither you nor dan would survive this long without me.” max laughed and you threw the throw pillow at him.

not that he’s lying. you met max the same time you did daniel and you clicked immediately. he knows everything, comforted you many times as you pined over dan. he’s your best friend and he’s also daniel’s best friend. he knows more than anyone how deep the connection you two shared.

“go home already,” you tell him. you’re tired and slightly drunk and you just want to go to bed now. “and make sure you take him with you.”

max laughed at the way you said him like it’s a bad taste on your tongue but did as you said anyways.

that night, you laid on the bed you and james shared, you couldn’t sleep. he’s fast asleep next to you, his arm over your stomach as you lay wide awake. you shouldn’t have invited him because now he’s turned your world upside down again. everything you’ve built for yourself was gone the moment his eyes met yours. he’s a plague, sucking all the happiness out of you.

eventually though, the restless night was about to get worse as you picked up your phone, scrolling through your contacts till you found his name. you stared at it for a while, knowing that you shouldn’t but you’re rattled and your self control is at an all time low. you shouldn’t have been trusted to make any types of decisions.

you come back to what you need

daniel was waiting for you when you parked your car outside his apartment building, hand gripping his phone as he watched you step out of the vehicle. four years since he first let you go and one year since he last saw you and you look as beautiful as you ever were.

he shouldn’t have told you to come but he’s so exhausted from staying away, from waiting for the right time. there will never be a right time and tonight, he’s done holding back. he wants you, he always has and he no longer has the energy to stop himself from wanting you.

“i shouldn’t be here,” was the first thing you said as he opened the door for you.

a lazy, almost mocking smile covered his lips. “and yet here you are.”

you glared at him but daniel’s heart was soaring. it’s been so long since you were this close. he can smell the perfume that followed you and the scent of your shampoo. he’s so so tired, he just wanted to hold you.

he’s going to make this as hard as possible, you realize. you’re no longer a child, he doesn’t need to play nice and easy with you anymore. you’re a woman now and he’s going to treat you like one. but you just need to get over this. you need closure. you need to put him in the past where he truly belongs so you can go about your life. you need him out of your system.

daniel may be everything you wanted but it’s time to accept that he’ll never be what you need.

“why did you come?” you asked, wanting to get this over with as quickly as you can. three years pining for him in red bull and four years of longing for him and everything leads you here.

daniel cocked an eyebrow. he’s done with playing nice. “you invited me.”

okay, you walked right into that one. “you still shouldn’t have come.”

daniel wanted to laugh. “i guess we both like doing shit that we shouldn’t do. now the question is, sweetheart, what are you doing here?”

“i’m getting married, daniel,” you whispered. “we need to accept that it isn’t us.”

“i thought you did that in abu dhabi.”

he’s being an asshole. “you’re the one who told me to leave. you don’t get to be mad that i’m moving on.”

“you’re not moving on,” he laughed, leaning against the wall.

you glared at him. “yes, i am. i’m getting married!”

he looked at you as though you said something hilarious and you wanted to punch him in the face for it. “and yet you’re here.”

“for closure.”

he stepped towards you and you found yourself holding your breath. from this close, you can see the freckles on your cheeks, the ones you used to spend all your time trying to memorize. the curve of his plump lips and the intensity in his eyes. and when he touched, it felt like the first drop of rain after a million years of dessert. his hand perfectly fitted on your hips, warm and so achingly familiar.

his hand snaked from your hip to your legs, finger light on your skin as he ever so slightly tugged at your shorts. you need to pull away but your body needs him closer. you want him. you want him to get closer. you want him to touch you more, to feel his skin against yours. you can have every single inch of his body pressed against yours and you’d still begged to get closer.

his lips graze your cheek before it reaches your ear, even breathes in contrast to your desperately shaky ones. “is that really what you want, baby?”

with every ounce of sanity you have left, you forced yourself to nod and you can feel the way his lips formed into a mocking smile against your cheek.

“really?” he mocked. “then why are you clutching my shirt like you want more?”

you hadn’t even realized the way your fist is holding on to his shirt, pulling him closer towards you like you’re terrified he’d disappear right between your fingertips.

“fuck,” you muttered, the heat of his skin against yours dizzying. james is nowhere near your mind as your hand slips under his shirt, self control flying out the window as you feel the curves of his abs. you want him. you’ve always wanted him so desperately that you’re willing to go to hell for it. “fuck me.”

he kissed you then, fire in his lips as it finally finally touched yours. this is all you’ve ever asked for and it’s worth the damnation you’d be paying in return. you pull him impossibly closer, going on your tiptoes. you need to get closer. closer, closer, closer.

like an addicted chainsmoker to cigarettes, you can’t get enough of his kiss. you want to inhale the fumes of his breath, of him, deep into your lungs. he tugs at your shirt and you pull away enough for him to get it off.

you grunt in complaint when he pulled away from you, only to swallow it back as his lips attached to the skin of your chest, licking and nibbling as it slowly made it way down.

“oh,” you breathe out as he lips attached to your breast, your fingers tugging at his curls as his tongue circled your nipple.

you should have stopped him the moment his hand unbuttoned your shorts but as he bent you over and his hand slipped between your folds and he trapped your moans with his mouth, you were far too gone. god be damned, morality be damned. you’d crawl through hell for this.

but eventually, reality comes knocking and morning comes and your bliss ends. you woke up from your phone ringing, cocooned in daniel’s arms.

“don’t answer it,” he mutters but sleepily, you grab your phone from the nightstand, seeing james’ name on your screen.

and that snaps you out of it, being reminded of what happened the night before and what you did and you all but jumped out of his arms as though his touch burned you.

“fuck, fuck, fuck,” you mutter under your breath as you hurriedly put on your clothes, daniel watching you still naked from his place on the bed. you turned to him, “this never happened.”

you watched as anger slowly filled his eyes. “are you being serious right now?”

“i’m getting married, daniel!” you’re panicking now, screaming as your phone rings again.

“then why the fuck were you knocking on my door at two in the morning?”

you ignore him, gathering your things. “it was a mistake.”

he’s glaring at you now, looking like he wanted to start screaming. but he remains silent, only glaring as you gather your things and put on your clothes.

you look at him again, apologies and sorrow in your eyes. “i’m sorry but this isn’t me. this can’t be me.”

and then you left, not allowing yourself to look back as you ran to your car. maybe in a parallel universe or a different world, you sit next to each other at the kitchen table and go over the grocery list, but for all the universes and worlds there are, this one was not enough, not for now and not for you and daniel.

when you finally arrive home, your father is in the kitchen, eyeing you up as you walk past him. “where were you? james was looking for you.”

you grimace. there’s a knowing look in christian’s eyes as though whatever you reason he already knows will be a lie. and unfortunately, he’d be right. “i was out with friends.”

“at seven in the morning?” he narrowed his eyes and you hated his timing. of all times, did he have to question you now?

“breakfast.”

you all but run to your room before he can question you further, thanking all the gods that james isn’t there. for a moment, you stood stunned, reeling from the past twenty four hours as the guilt settles in your chest. you need to get as far away from daniel as you possibly can. you can’t be the type of woman who cheats on her fiance. you refuse to be. you refuse to break a good man’s heart like that.

and yet as you finally calm down enough to try and fix yourself, your phone buzzes, his name appearing on your screen saying he sent you a text message.

daniel i’ve loved you in every way i can. i loved you selfishly and so i tried loving you distantly, i tried loving you selflessly, i tried loving you correctly but i just want to love you now. if i could do it all over again, i would love you better but i can’t love you more than i do now.

this love came back to me

the wind is chilly as you step foot in hungary and the dress you wore is definitely not meant for it but still, you persevere, finding your way to the red bull motorhome and greeting your father. the last time you attended a grand prix was abu dhabi 2021 and yet it still feels like home.

“there’s my biggest fan!” max cheered the moment he saw you, immediately wrapping his arms around you. he hasn’t seen you for nearly a year and he missed his best friend. to be fair, no one has seen you for nearly a year, disappearing from the face of the earth after your failed engagement.

after the night of your engagement party, the guilt ate you alive as you realized that you were exactly the kind of girl you didn’t want to be and so you came clean to james. he screamed and cried and said you could work it out but you were exhausted from lying to yourself. as long as there was daniel, you can never be happy with anyone else and no man deserve to be someone you simply settled with.

you realized then that you’d lost yourself. you don’t know who you are, don’t know who you’ve become and so you left everything you know, ignoring everyone’s calls as you attempt to find yourself.

“actually, i’m supporting ferrari,” you joke once max finally lets you go.

“i’ll disown you!” your father screamed from across the garage, making you and max laugh.

“have you seen him?” max asked, whispering as though he’s telling you a secret.

you shake your head. coincidentally enough, or ironically, the first gp you attend in a while, daniel is announced to race in. and max, quite frankly, is far too excited for the two of you to see each other again. he’s had enough watching you both be stupid.

after catching up with max and the mechanics you still know, you find yourself in a cafe with your father, talking about everything and nothing at all. christian watched your every move and you can see the worry in his eyes. he’s part of the people you ran from and you know that it was a cruel thing to do to your father.

and then he was there and you’re all too familiar with the feeling of your world freezing the moment your eyes meet. he looks better, happier and you’re sure you look different too, hopefully more grown.

“you’re here,” he says, unbelieving.

you smile, genuine and free this time. “i’m here.”

and this time around, you were both tired of fighting it. it’s him. it’s always been him. there was no point denying it. he’s the only person you’ll ever want. you are totally and irrevocably in love with him – the kind of love that’s so intense it feels like an explosion of fireworks throughout your whole body. the love that leaves you sleepless but exhilarated, speechless but poetic, lost but exactly where you're meant to be.

and in that moment, your lives flashed before your eyes – marriage, children, growing old together.

daniel ricciardo is the defining moment, the collision of stars that slammed into you so hard it tore your heart in pieces and only he can put it back together again.

he smiles at you and you smile back.

hello, love, welcome home.

and finally, finally, it felt like the world isn’t burning anymore.

taglist: @ricsaigaslec @dragon-of-winterfell @coffeehurricanes @rdtbattinson @privcherry7 @miniminescapist @sebsdaniel @strelcka @writing-about-current-obsessions @amsofftrack @lostinketterdam @bisexual-desi @cialovessirlewis @multilovebot @lovelynikol16 @troybolton-14 @ohthemissery @dr3lover @myescapefromthislife @sunf1owerrq @the6ccnsp6cyy @t-nd-rfoot @navixfr @xjval @gridbunny

@heyoooo1111 @littlefreaksatellite @imxthunderstorms @o0itsjustme0o @bigdickdannyric1 @hellomumitsme @llarue @ironmaiden1313 @magic-s0ul @lynnthinksthings @vainbimbo @3khaos @chimchimjiminie16 @lost-heartbeat @thxtmarvelchick @s4dgir1jaehyun @dreaminofpoison @lewishamiltonstuff @mk15x @angywritesstuff @that-aesthetic-chic @artemis-medusa @capbuckybuchanan @moonvr @softsakusas @closhelby @

#daniel ricciardo x reader #daniel ricciardo #daniel ricciardo angst #daniel ricciardo fluff #daniel ricciardo x you #daniel ricciardo imagine #daniel ricciardo one shot #daniel ricciardo fanfic #formula 1 #formula 1 x reader #f1 #f1 x reader #f1 one shot #f1 fanfic #formula 1 one shot #max verstappen

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sh1-n0bu · 11 months

Note

yall this is my first time requesting something from someone so im a bit nervous but

imagine overstimulating venti until he cries 🤭

also can i be 🌊 anon ? PLEASE tell me if anything i asked made you uncomfortable!!

♡︎ 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙚𝙢𝙤 𝙜𝙤𝙙’𝙨 𝙙𝙚𝙫𝙤𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 ♡︎

characters: sub!venti x nb!dom!reader

warnings: overstimulation, size kink, dacryphillia, reader’s genitals/pronouns are never mentioned so the cock can be interpreted as a strap on

notes: of course you can be 🌊anon! and yes, i’m slowly coming back to life. man author’s block is hard to beat. also, if this get’s flagged by tumblr when i wake up tmrw, i’ll delete it and post it again so don’t get too scared if it’s suddenly gone bbies

venti, or better yet known as barbatos to his people, was never really much of an archon.

he never plays by the rules, governs over his people nor even tries to abide by celestia’s rules. often, the wind spirit simply prefers to lay back and watch as his people takes care of any problems. they’re strong after all, his children always has been. of course, the windborn bard slurs out words of being the anemo archon in his drunk dazed self but no one ever takes it seriously.

and another thing was that, venti never worships the celestia. the floating island in the sky is full of nothing but liars, manipulators and cowards. besides… why would he worship those pathetic things when you’re right here?

why kneel before them when he can kneel before you?

why worship those who spat venom everytime they open their mouth when ballads and praises, songs of life flow from yours?

why chase after meaningless praises when your words sting like the strongest alcohol, burning his throat, making his eyes water as he becomes more and more addicted to you?

that’s exactly why the anemo archon prefers to worship you instead. when you braid his hair and comb out the knots as he nuzzles against your form, dazed and sleepy.

when you’re there to console him, help him through his darkest days when those wretches of celestia has done nothing.

when you’re kissing away the tears that spill from his eyes, shushing his slurred speeches and sobs of pleasure as you continue to ram into that one spot inside him, making him shriek and spill over his stomach again and again.

the windborn bard could worship you for eternity.

spilling another load into his stomach, the god in your arms spasms and twitches as his legs weakly wrap around your waist to at least try and calm the twitching of his small body.

dear stars above, you felt so big he could almost feel your tip in his stomach in his sex drunken haze. slurred whines of what seems to be your name flowing out of his mouth as he tries to keep his last threads of sanity together but how can he do so when he can just feel your previous loads slipping out of his rim and down to the sheets.

it all felt so hot, the room was so hot, everything was spinning. the warmth of your cum seeping out of his hole, the slight bulge in his stomach, the feeling of your finger wiggling in next to his already stuffed hole and pushing the cum back inside while your cock stays in — venti lets out a weak sound.

“look at you, little bird. you’re leaking out my cum that i worked so hard to put in you. can’t have my hard work being spent, right?” you coo out teasingly, a grin bit too sadistic tugging on your lips as venti writhes under you when you add in another finger. stars above, were you trying to break him?

venti couldn’t respond. he couldn’t even fully understand and register your words. brain too fried from the previous rounds of your just absolutely handling his small body around, pinching, teasing, smacking, leaving marks and hickeys but he loved it all.

as a response, the bard only weakly bucks his hips back into your strap again seemingly wanting more. my, what an insatiable little bird.

throwing his leg over your shoulder, you take out your fingers from his hole and squeeze his tiny waist once in a warning before fucking back into him again. small whines, weak noises and slurred whorish moans spill out from under you, the anemo archon far too fucked stupid to even try to properly say your name anymore.

making a grabby motion with his hands — a silent ask to hold you close while you fuck him full of your cum again — you decide to be nice and lean down, the absolutely filthy wet noises of your cock easily entering him causing venti to dig his blunt nails into your back, pulling you closer to himself.

feeling another orgasm building up embarrassingly quickly, the archon chases after your lips with weak whines, a sob following as you deny him of a proper kiss. instead teasing him by kissing his soft cheek. he didn’t even realize he was crying.

but soon those soft and weak whimpers and slurred words turn into a sharp scream as he feels himself cumming into both of your stomachs again, a sob of your name following along as you chase your high, getting more frantic with your movements.

the archon feels himself getting filled up again when your hips stutter, causing the short man under you to whimper a quiet “[n-nameee…❤︎︎]” in your ears.

after having caught your breath, you pull away from him slightly. pushing his hair away from his face, you couldn’t help but laugh as you wipe away his tears. but that laugh is cut off short as the archon bucks his hips against yours again, a cheeky grin pulling on his lips.

#nobu.writes #sub genshin impact #sub genshin #sub!genshin impact #sub!genshin #sub venti #sub!venti #genshin impact smut #genshin impact x reader smut #genshin x reader smut #genshin smut #venti x reader smut #venti smut #🌊 anon #new anon!!!#gender neutral reader

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wlfpet · 1 year

Text

(Abby Anderson x Fem!Reader)

— PAPI BONES

A/N: Hi, this is the formerly scrapped, 3x longer, 2 months writing project that I had because I wanted to fuck abby in a closet! this was actually supposed to be my first post on tumblr, but i got mad at it and sent it to the dungeon for two months :/ but yall wanted it, so I'm super happy i got to finish it, even though it took multiple days and cups of coffee to power through. sorry for the wait, hope you fuck wit her.

content tags (can you tell i don't want to write anymore ;w;): college au, childish antics at a big age, drinking, cool, ellie and dina are in this! kind of abstract sexual descriptions, assplay, cunnilingus (r!receiving), boob... touching? small mention of drugs because dealer!ellie, drunk sex, enthusiastic consent! :D, reader is kind of annoying sorry, men being assholes, reader catching feelings for a girl she fucked once, real.

wc: 7.6k ;w; (send help)

proofread?; barely.

tl : @clearheartgreyflowers, @oatmilkchaii, @ghostfacebunny, @ellsbclls (thank you to the sweetest deb @ellsbclls for helping beta read this, i appreciate your suggestions and encouragement and this would probably have been scrapped TWICE without your help ;w; )

synopsis: your best friend dina drags you to a college frat party. you hate shit like this, and you're painfully shy but when she does those puppy dog eyes you can't say no, so in a cruel twist of fate you end up in the closet with abby Anderson, and lose your virginity. yay college! (apart of the 'jackson university' thematic!)

Your idea of a Saturday night well spent wasn’t squeezing through a sea of sweaty backs; but like many things in your life, it wasn’t up to you, because you were easily swayed. Everything was overstimulating, the waves of bodies on bodies that pulsated and threw you between different poses and balances to keep on your feet, the ringing of laughter, of music, of every sound echoing in your head, around your body, vibrating through your very core. The smell of liquor and drunken antics and that one guy puking in the corner made you sick. But somehow, you were here, spurred on by peer pressure friendship and goodwill, trudging through the blackened room to your target; the snack table.

Dina, your roommate, and determinant best friend held a firm hand on the small of your back, pushing you through the crowd and causing a small jolt to run down your body as she steered you around every obstacle and corner in the room. She was a woman on a mission, and the one who dragged you out of bed, convincing you - against your better judgment- that it was fatal that you accompanied her to a frat party. You knew she was good-natured, and your first friend when you moved 500 miles away from home to college. It was an instant click, but you were opposite best friends.

Dina, ever the social butterfly, had connections in all different spaces; she could party with the sorority girls –hold the coke, please,– out-cram everyone, even the National Honor Society kids, all the way to the top of the class, hell, she was on the damn debate team, which was probably why it wasn’t a struggle to get a ‘yes’ out of you. You, on the other hand, were uncomfortable at bars, school sporting events, and parties, and one time you even thre– fuck, never mind. It was all effortless to her, in almost an enviable way. Dina loved to go clubbing, loved to hang, out, and she had been near-begging you to come out with her and her cool friends for months, not that you’re not cool, I mean.

And somehow, despite everything, it worked.

You could almost remember how you got there if you put away the sticky crunch of coke sticking to your shoes with each step, and reached back into the recesses of your mind. Or at least, back three-and-a-half hours ago.

“They’re all great people, no weirdos, promise!”

It was the emphatic plea made to you as you lay on your bed, queuing up the next episode of the apocalypse show you watched each week, watching her make Dina list off every reason why you just had to follow her out tonight. It was clearly very life-or-death shit to her, but you were unconvinced. It was just a party but there was going to be a smaller, more intimate kickback in a friend-of-a-friend’s basement. She was in the middle of getting ready, sitting at her school-issue desk and looking at herself in the mirror, dark hair coned over her head in a bun as she sat in deep concentration, words slurred and simple as she applied mascara, her mouth slacked into an O position.

“So you’re gonna like, fucking go, yeah?”

She said it as though it was obvious, like it wasn’t a question, but one look at you, –curled up in covers, laptop on chest, martini glass pajama pants and teddy bear teeshirt ON, unbothered– showed her that it would be a tall order, and that big guns would be needed.

“Not interested, sorry.”

“Not even a tinyyyyy bit?” Dina squeezed her fingers together for emphasis, throwing her head back in mock exhaust, a theatric groan rumbling out of her throat. “Not even a little bit.” You echoed, your roommate cutting her eye at you through her handheld mirror, but it was what it was. You weren’t into all of that stuff; the bump and grind of sweaty bodies wasn’t alluring, listening to someone else’s shitty music at ear-bleeding levels felt like hell, and if you wanted to get pitifully drunk and throw up all over yourself, there was a garbage can right under your bed. But your friend really, really, wanted your company and it made you feel, really, really bad to always blow her off.

“Why are you going so hard on this?” You bemused as you propped up on your elbows, watching as she stalked around the room in her newly painted face, quickly rummaging through her drawer for a spare outfit.

“Maybe because it bums me out to see my super cool roommate wasting away in her dorm every weekend?” In Dina’s mind, she was making a lot of sense. She was waiting for you to chime in, to say you know what, Dee? You’re right, I get it. But instead, you stared blankly, and she threw down her arms in exasperation. “You’re in fucking college, man! You don’t even wanna have one night of fun?” She punctuated the ‘fucking’ with a wild gesture around her head, which made you chuckle to yourself.

“I mean, I was planning on wa–”

Your body was jostled by an insane amount of weight, almost turned completely over by two roughhousing dudes– a mess of limbs and arms, who looked at you and then at each other, as though they had spontaneously sobered up. You didn’t even have the time to start to be angry when they prattled off a blended, slurred apology and thrashed somewhere away through the mass of hands and faces in the dark room.

Fucking assholes, ruining the flashback sequence.

The room was lit only by haphazard mood lights; soft LEDs and gaudy, flickering Christmas baubles, a solitary television, camped by stoners who laughed madly, and the dim auburn glow of the odd ceiling lamp nestled in the far back of the house. You were out of your element; you couldn’t dance, weren’t the most social, and even though you were with a friend, all of this made you feel very alone.

Dina cut through the crowd with her elbow, bellowing out “Ex–cuse me!” while she pushed you through gaps as they formed. Her voice fell to mutter again, barely audible, chunked and cut by the music bouncing from wall to wall, grumbling that she had places to be, and if E*&^$ didn’t get her off at least once, there would be hell to pay. She was determined to get to the other side of the room, where it was arranged that by the chips, as smokers usually are, she would find her current fuckbuddy and her friends, waiting to hotbox and pregame a bit more before the room peaked. She was driven by horniness and selfishness, as one typically is after four shots of Tito’s vodka, and getting smoked out and ‘taken care of’ upstairs was half the reason she even came.

You’d never met her most recent suitor, and the question of her girlfriend was always met with a ‘no, she’s just my sneaky link.’ but you didn’t question it enough to know more. She was just the girl who Dina would go off campus to meet, and as long as she wasn’t a slasher, and her pre-rolls knocked you on your ass, it would be what it was. You were carried away by your friend’s excitement, by her heavy hand nearly lifting you off of your feet as she beelined to the kitchen, wrangling your twin bodies every which way.

“Ellie! Ellie!” She yelled, jumping up and down a bit to compensate for her voice being swallowed by the bass. She burrowed through the wave, pushing you towards a girl leaning against the sink, nursing a red cup and low, hazy eyes. Her auburn hair was swallowed by a black docker, and a dark-coloured backpack jutted out from behind her as she smiled and waved the two of you –mostly Dina, into her orbit. She looped her head under your shoulder to be pulled into the strong hug of firm biceps, and Arms looked you over, offering a friendly nod.

–

“It’s on streaming. You can watch ‘Many of Them’ literally whenever!”

“Live tweeting is a part of the experience.” You chided matter-of-factly, sitting up cross-legged. It wasn’t like the brunette was wrong, exactly, but you couldn’t give up too much at once. Going soft was not a part of the plan.

“Fuck, whatever– You know the girl I’ve been hooking up with, right?” Her eyebrow raised at your dispassionate ‘not really.’ “Well you know her fucking joints, she sells– weed, shrooms… pills?” Dina listed off with her finger, mulling over the last detail for a second, then confirming in her head with a nod. It’s fine, you’re cool, and the two of you had always bonded over your love of recreational joy anyways. “So, if you wanna smoke orsomething– I got you, all you have to do is show up.” Her hands were up almost sheepishly as she tested the waters, but you weren’t super convinced, and your idea of fun wasn’t exactly playing wingman while she got tongue-fucked by a drug dealer, and the pregnant pause was enough to cue her into having to bring out the big guns.

“-And, and! I'll wash all our dishes, and cleanyoursideoftheroomforaweek.”

Damn, she practically ran through that last part, so under her breath you knew she was hoping that you didn’t hear. But you did, and for a second you could almost see a smirk play on her face as your eyes lit up. She was always up for a good bribe, and even though she would act annoyed, it was great for breaking you out of your shell. She would offer to watch the zombie show if you came out to the bars in your college town with her, pizza if you confessed to your crush instead of instastalking them three times a day, even though it didn’t work, –oh well, shooters shoot– and tonight? A week free from chores if you just spent a couple of hours in your own personal hell. Yeah, you would give her this one.

“Now we’re talking. If you want someone to be the lookout while you and Jesse Pinkman go at it, who am I to deny?” You teased, kicking your legs over the edge of the bed.

Your roommate craned her head up, momentarily stopping her mission of rifling through her clothes. “Who said that?”

“You’re in your ‘good panty’ drawer.” You whispered cheekily.

“Well, you got me. Someone has to get fucked around here.”

“Oh fuck you, bitch!” You laughed, throwing your pillow, hitting smack in the center of her chest.

Dina bounced around the room, practically billowing with glee. There was a descending, barely audible ‘fuck yeah’ as she traipsed down the hall towards the bathroom, rounding the corner and disappearing from your periphery.

“By the way, you know Jesse’s last name is Huang, right, not Pinkman? And we’re uh– not together anymore.” Dina shouted through the silence.

“That’s a character from Breaking Bad. It was a joke– because he’s a drug de–” You stopped yourself midway. “Never mind. It’s not funny if I explain it.”

“Oh– I never watched Breaking Bad. Too Long.” She deadpanned. You chuckled to yourself, shaking your head as you slid your way off the bed.

That’s how you found yourself in a dimly lit bathroom, missing the comfort of your memories as ‘Ellie’ rolled a blunt. You stood leaning against the door and Dina sat on the closed toilet seat. The dealer sealed the last of the leaf with a flick of the tongue and a lick of spit, maintaining direct eye contact with Dina so she could not-so-subtly show off. She passed it to the brunette first, who mimed a cheeky, ‘why thank you’ and drew poutily. You three sat there for a while, smoking and talking, steam from the hot shower wafting above your heads as music pumped through the foundation of the house.

There was laughter outside of the door and it soon became awkward for you, Ellie and Dina finishing the blunt, –you were a lightweight– and chatting idly as Dina traced a fingertip against the outline of the tattoo Ellie was showing off.

The temperature of the tiny room ran hotter between their reddened eyes, and it was as though you were being banished by a galactic force. You couldn’t mistake how the red-haired girl’s glance caught an extra second or so at the way Dina’s body was hugged just right in her party dress, cleavage strained against the fuchsia PVC of her neckline, and how she bit the corner of her lip when her eyes hooked on a dark mole on Dina’s breast that was framed by the feathers of her black hair.

It was time to go, unless you were interested in seeing your best friend get dug out on the countertop.

You were already a little bit wobbly, hearing a giggle that slipped from Dina’s lips morph into a squeak as you slipped out of the crack you pulled in the door and into the fray, getting carried down the stairs and back over to the drinks. You crossed over a kissing couple, cutting into their makeout and heavy petting session, and through a huddled together group of girls whispering something about seeing an ex across the room.

You gripped onto the countertop for stability when you finally broke free from the pulsating wave of bodies. There was a bit of everything surfing in deep bowls of ice and water, open bags of chips and snacks bunched up together on the island. You could not be sober for this shit. You wedged up the pop cap on a hard seltzer and brought it to your lips, the spirit coating your tongue and boiling its way into your stomach. There it was again, the familiar warm feeling in your hands and feet, the soft pressure already creeping across the flat of your face. Yeah, now that was it. The anxiety began to melt away, and you leaned against the countertop, flexing your legs.

Wow, they’re inviting giants to the shindig too. You laughed to yourself as the scarlet-lit ocean parted, and a tall, wide figure walked through and into the darkness of a descending flight of stairs. If only it was that easy when you needed to piss, notwithstanding that you had already been in the bathroom.

It’s fun being sardonic sometimes.

Out of the corner of your eye, you could see your roommate coming down the stairs, the dealer’s deft fingers pulling down part of her dress that rode up her ass. She arched her head up, straining left and right like the eye of a submarine as she looked for you; her eyes lit up, waving to you as she fisted her companion’s belt loop, bouldering through the sea of people. She was high as fuck, if her bright pink eyes were enough to speak to it, and your gaze lingered over the new expanse of a deep purplish hickey on her neck, small indents from teeth glimmering with saliva in the light.

There was that hotness again that burned in the pit of your stomach, not from drunkenness or anxiety, but the can of fruity liquor in your hand covered up for the embarrassing flush of your wild cherry-coloured cheeks. You peeled your eyes back up to her face and smiled dumbly. You’d never had *that* before. You’ve watched things before at least, and obviously, touched yourself to the thought, but you’ve never had someone to fool around with in bathrooms or hold your skirt when it rode up.

There was your first kiss, but it was in middle school, so it didn't count. It was all clammy lips, two noses that couldn’t get the space between them *quite* right, and an overzealous set of chompers that left you with a bloody lip. Actual horseshit, but somehow, a core memory. It was annoying in a way, how it just didn’t come to you, but you wanted to be wanted. To be lusted over, desired even in that casual touchy way that simmered between your best friend and the girl you didn’t know very well. Dina was making grabby hands at you, wide-eyed and bushy-tailed. Your drink bobbed as she whisked you to her will, you and Ellie sharing a knowing look as she pushed your bodies through the hall and down the darkness of the stairwell.

–

“RULES ARE SIMPLE,” some asshole in a hat bellowed as he stood over all of you who sat in the circle, mildly drunk off your asses and looking for easy fun. He held up a black beer bottle, carrying it like a trophy and swishing it around your noses for a closer look. “You kids might know seven minutes in heaven.” You didn’t know him, but according to Dina, this was his house, his party, and his very annoying rules. A light patch of raised skin played against his nose as he scrunched his nose over and over again, hands on hips, clearly trying to steal back whatever thought the liquor took from him. Jason, right?

Whatever.

“But we’re all grown-ups here, so I present to you–” He rolled the bottle in hand, clearly soft-launching his bright idea. “Fifteen minutes in purgatory!” There was a deep groan radiating from some, but there was a small minority that exploded in cheers, and whoops. “Pretty self-explanatory, two adventurers venture deep into purgatory, and come out forever changed.

“Two adventurers go deep into purgatory,” He gestured his head at the foreboding broom closet in the back of the room. “And return forever changed.”

“We’ll use the bottle to choose our unlucky voyagers, and you’ll spend fifteen minutes in the closet.” He explained, dropping the mystique in the second half. “Alright kids, let’s start; and just for the record– If you’re a pussy, get the fuck out of the circle!”

The drunken cast of partiers whooped and cheered, hyping each other up, spilling beer out of red cups as they gestured wildly, entirely too grown for this. The room played ‘not it’ to pick who got the first spin, and the unfortunate soul was a blonde who sat cross-legged, blank-eyed at the black glass handed to her, nodding her head tersely.

“We got our very own Abigail Anderson– !” Her eyes narrowed. “Andddd….” Hat praised, cueing her to spin. She took the bottle, pointing the tip towards herself and then spinning it, the glass doubling, tripling the circle, making you dizzy chasing it with your eyes, and everyone sat with bated breath. It slowed and slowed and slowed, until, like ugly fate, it stopped at your feet.

“Our newbie!” He got up to cheese, leaning over you, placing his hands over your shoulders, and rocking you from side to side. You laughed awkwardly, putting your palms up defensively at nothing.

“Um– uh…” You were at a loss for words, only cut off as his head shot into your field of view, hot, hopsy breath tanging your nostrils. “What, you scared?” He taunted, all eyes on you, watching as you nursed a deep discomfort about the whole thing behind an uneasy smile.

“You’re a fucking asshole, Jordan.” The girl, Abby, groaned. She looked up at you from her downward pointing head, swishing her bottle of hard cider in the hand propped over her knee. Jordan, that was the name of this dickhead. Yeah, fuck him. “If she doesn’t want to get in the closet, she doesn’t want to get in the closet. I’ll just spin again.”

Dina cut in, the redhead still leaning lazily against her. “Yeah, don’t–dont be a dick, Jordan.” Her face was tight, and Ellie was annoyed because Dina was annoyed, and the room held a pregnant silence, and even though it wasn’t your fault, you felt all too responsible and all too uncomfortable with all of the eyes watching you.

“It’s fine, guys. Let’s all– eh, chill out, okay? I’m going to take the dare.” You leaned in, voice dropping to a whisper, trying to steal back the vibe, trying to replace the tension with playful drama as you circled your head around, wiggling the fingers slightly of your held-up palms. “Because I’m not a little bitch.”

The crowd exploded in raucous laughter, each voice clashing together and mimicking the sound of a pipe bursting. You looked over at your partner, who seemed pleasantly surprised, a smirk playing on her peach lips. She placed down her bottle and stood, and as she towered over you, you realised that maybe you were playing with fire. She was scary and nonchalant, but the outer workings of her face were soft and gentle. She didn’t look like the girls in the videos you watched at night; she was something different, uncharted, and before you knew it, a nervousness, and something lower, darker, ran through your body.

Then it was time to go, you piling in first, looking around at some of the half-darkness in the room, barely enough to fit two people in.

The asshole patted the girl’s back, corralling her into the closet behind you. Blood rushed to your head, the pressure was too great, like getting skullfucked through your ears. show her a good time, you could hear him say, and then something that you couldn’t quite understand over the bass. The mountain’s eyes narrowed, but before she could shoot back, her large body crashed into yours and the space became tighter and tighter, just enough for the two of you to put your arms out to either side or turn around. For a split second, you could see Dina’s face from over Jordan’s shoulder, tightened in concern, a timid thumbs up at the side of her head. Then, he closed the door, and the last of the light slipped out through the crack in the wall.

There was a deep silence, and somehow, like the hazy feeling you get right before you wake from a dream, you were chest to chest in the darkness with her blue eyes staring back at you, damn-near bioluminescent. You’d seen her around, because everyone sees her around, but it hadn’t registered that the giant who had parted all of those people in the crowd like they were just water, was standing right in front of you. Outside you could hear the rumble of the music, vibrations of the bass wrapping around you and shaking you from the inside out. The closet was too tight, too warm, too filled with smells from towels and coats and folded blankets and dusty boxes of light bulbs and two cramped, awkward bodies.

Suddenly, you felt all too intimidated.

“You’re Abigail, right?” You questioned. “Off the rugby team?”

“Abby.” You couldn’t read her face in the dark, and though she spoke pointedly she didn’t seem angry, but the accidental overstep was enough to make you want to dig a hole through the floor with your bare hands and die in it. “And yeah– captain, of the rugby team.”

“Oh, sorry, sorry.” You yielded. “So… what are we supposed to do? In here, I mean.” You gestured at nothing, knocking some washcloths from a top shelf down in the dark. “Ah, damn it.” You cursed under your breath, bending down to pick up the small stack. You could hear Abby behind you, sucking her teeth with a judgy hum. Her brows were almost touching her eyelids, captured in secondhand embarrassment, and she almost felt bad for how awkward you were, scrambling to pick them up from the floor.

If you could see her face, you’d be able to tell how her eyes flicked up and down her body, taking everything in. Your black skirt slid slightly to bunch at the front, uncovering portions of your doughy thigh and the ever-so-tiniest range of fabric hiding your prettiest secret. She had to tear her eyes away, almost. She jumped, even, glad you couldn’t see as you popped back up.

You were cute, holding the disheveled stack in your hands, a look of sheer pride on your face. You looked over to the side, tossing them unceremoniously on a free shelf, gravity taking a couple back to the ground. Your sated chuckle, the way your tits pushed up slightly, illuminated, almost framed like art by the neckline of your cream cardigan made her hungry. She pushed the ideas of what she wanted to do with them out of her mind, but damn, she could think about some things that would make the devil embarrassed. She stomped down her desire, stoicism crossing her for a second, only for her to open it back up on second thought.

“They want us to fool around, fuck, ideally.” She started, analysing your expressions for any hint of discomfort at the conversation. “But– we don’t have to do anything.” She tried to cut some of the thick discomforts with a placating smile, almost lost in detail in the low light. She was huge, more so than you, or most anyone else you knew, the jutting-out edge of a shelf knocking the back of her head every time she leaned her head back in the tight space. The hard washboard of her torso was framed by an opening of a grey hoodie and barely much else, just the thick band of her boxers peeking from her sweatpants, and the black of a cropped tank top that stopped right below her bra line.

“Jordan… is typically a good guy, but when he gets drunk he’s a total POS.” Abby was sallow-faced, pursing her lips, tension running through her jawline. “I shouldn’t have let him put you on the spot like that. So… I’m sorry that you got pressured to get in here.”

“It’s fine, I just.” You started, ready to say that big phrase, the one that slightly burned your back to admit. “I’ve never done anything like this before.”

“What, played seven minutes in heaven? Yeah, kind of a jackass thing to suggest in your twenties.”

Shit. She was going to make you say it.

“No. I mean I’ve never–” and you thought your tiny voice couldn’t get any tinier. “had sex before.”

Abby breathed in the deepest sigh, pure anxiety crossing her face for a split second, before she was feeding you apologies. “It’s fine, we don’t have to do anything we can just sit here and talk. Or be in silence if you want it’s alr–”

“I want to do it.” You said doggedly, pressing yourself into a tiny corner. Her brow perched, and there was something in those narrowing blue eyes that said she didn’t believe you. You were pigeontoed, legs shifting against one another, declaring in your firmest voice that you wanted her to take your virginity.

“Are you sure?” She breathed out, stepping a bit closer. “You don’t have to feel pressured to do anything because you think they want a show.”

“Oh, my god.” You were pouting, annoyed. “I can choose if I want to have sex you know, and I want to have sex right here right n–”

She kissed you, softly as possible, testing your waters to see how far you were willing to go. Her hands were patient, one lightly knotted in the woolen knit of your cardigan to lightly pet your lower back, the other making gentle grips on your sweatered arm. Her fingers were barely bruising, gripping around your wrist almost tight enough, and a tiny shockwave coursed between your thighs and convinced you that you wanted more. In this low light, in this dark room, in this place between space and time, you wanted to be her conquest. To be taken, touched, manhandled, to be made to weather the storm of her overwhelming strength against you, lost in the middle of the ocean.

It was perverted, almost, how the idea of her showing restraint raised hairs on your skin, how you deepened the kiss like you were being overcome with an insatiable, bloody hunger. You had to take back the moment, to steal her attention in a way she couldn’t deny before she thought you were all talk; you stepped closer, positioning yourself so that her thigh hovered right below the heated space under your skirt. Her hand was warm, soft as you grabbed it, moving it lower, deeper down the divot of your back and where the fat of your ass connected. She caught on, groaning into your lips as she kneaded around your body, her tongue sweeter and heavier against yours, working that one damned hand up your skirt to cup bare skin.

You jumped.

As fast as it had come, her hand slipped back from under your skirt and the touch was lost completely, awkwardly hovering for a second until Abby pulled it back into her pocket and stepped back. You were miserable, eyes welling up in frustration like a lost dog at the lack of feeling. She was pulling you into insanity but was too chivalrous to drown you in it, rubbing the back of her neck sheepishly as she looked down at you.

“Fuck– didn’t mean to be aggressive like that. I–” The redness bled across her cheeks, freckles on full display as her fingers met the wet spot that you were hiding, your hands guiding hers to the space between your thighs. There was a pause, a knowing, a challenge between the two of you as an unknown heat spread throughout your bodies, and you collided once more. The blonde’s mouth sucked a nasty pressure into your throat, agitating it with bites and licks as her head traveled deeper, hands playing at the front of your sweatered torso to undo the buttons that held your breasts hostage.

Her entrance was assured as she popped the loops open, fingers gripping the fabric of your camisole and lifting up, taking your bra with it. She nipped at the exposed flesh, heat from her mouth traveling directly to your vagina, clit throbbing hard with need. Abby engulfed a nipple with the wetness of her tongue, closing her lips around the rapidly hardening bud to pull it to full attention, chuckling as she scraped the flesh with her teeth. The wet head was replaced with her palms, each thumb and forefinger rolling one or the other. The sensitivity of the tiny flesh was insane, enough to make you whine out loud as she continued, better than anything you had ever done to yourself.

You were biting your lip, eyes big and doe-like as you waded through your pleasure, soft pants heaving your chest. She fished it out from between your teeth and hooked it within her own, popping the plump flesh into her mouth as she pared yours with her tongue. You swore the room was spinning, a wetness slicking between your thighs, a drip positioned between two pairs of hungry lips. You could’ve spent all fifteen minutes– or an eternity, in this beautiful hell, giving and taking and relishing in a different, sort of strange type of want.

“Don’t stop.” You moaned in between stolen breaths, the blonde chasing your mouth each time you pulled away.

“For you, pretty?” Gripping you tighter for emphasis, pressing you closer into the wall, angling further between your spread legs. “Never.”

It was like you were some weird intoxication to her, a drug that she couldn’t get enough of. How your ass molded right into the divots of her palms, those tiny moans that rang through the cage you two were in, the rapid beating of your heart rippling through your body. She wanted to peel your cardigan from your shoulders, wanted to shred your clothes from your body and take you however she liked, and make you feel better than you knew what to do with. Needed to make you scream and fuck you until you cried. But it was your first time, so she resigned to being gentle and soft, like you were a little deer in the forest, and she was trying to get close without scaring you off. so she would give you only what you needed.

She didn’t have a lot of strong feelings about that nickname she had earned in sophomore year, War Machine, from all of the pretty girls she ran through and left unable to walk, unable to talk for a couple of days or more. but when Jordan said it, in front of you, in front of sweet and innocent, pretty and tiny *you* she could’ve reeled back and torn him apart. But she still didn’t want to scare you. So she had forced an alright, the one a child forces when they get scolded, and hid the burning in her palms that made her want to fight in the pocket of her pants.

Your eyes bored x-rays through her formidable thighs as she bent her knees to squad before you, strong hands rubbing up and down your thighs with contrasting gentleness to the hard angles of her face, the brow that was crooked down slightly in concentration, the slightly parted lips playing with mischief as they took you in. You were frightened for just a second, until Abby looked up at you with sympathetic eyes, a hand leaving your thigh and linking with your fingers, guiding you to the base of her skull to envelop her honeyed strands.

She was back at you, the darkness in your stomach leaking out as you palmed her head, and she ran her hands upward, more upward, until the ruffles of your cotton skirt were overturned in her palms. From the waist down, you were completely exposed, a wet spot working itself into your panties from your innermost recesses and a musky scent betraying your shyness.

Abby pressed herself gently into the fabric, her fat lips creating a cool pressure against the hot flesh, her nose itching lightly into your pubis. You bucked your hips unconsciously, nearly fucking her face in your abandon. A vibration from her laugh traveled through you, nestled inside of you, and more wetness began to slick your channel. That friendly ache formed in your rapidly hardening clit, and a similar pain throbbed in your pinkie and middle finger. Her other hand moved up, gripping fistfuls of your ass, less forgiving now, and forcing a squeak from your lips.

You were dumbstruck; a stranger’s hands all over you, mouth nearly on top of your sacred place, nearly leaking from sheer lust. She had barely done anything. Your jaw slacked, and in your mind you felt like a fool, lamenting how you thought your first time would be special. Soft circles rubbed into your inner thigh as she pulled your legs apart, peppering angel kisses throughout the little divots.

“S’okay, baby.” Her voice was barely a whisper, a tiny encouragement that calmed the buzzing in your mind. “Tell me how you want me. I’m yours.”

and you thought that declaration would destroy you,’ I’m yours.’ and it felt very, very real.

“I want you to touch me.” You said, barely a whisper, nodding as she pressed her face to your thigh, sliding down your panties to about knee-level. It was as though she had seen heaven’s gate open, awestruck at the blood rushing to engorge your lips, how your clit stood on end without even being touched. The thatch of hair curling between your thighs and around your depths. She had to have a taste, and there wasn’t much room for second-guessing as she pressed her mouth to the hot spot and flattened her tongue directly against the wettest space.

Juicy noises slid from her mouth as she rolled your clit between her tongue and sucked sharply with her lips, and it was as though you could’ve sunk to the floor, the way your legs became distinctly not yours. It was enough, enough, not enough, then too much. It was like you were an endlessly gushing fountain as Abby’s wet, firm tongue parted your lips, dipping ever so lightly into your hole as she licked out a string of nectar from your drooling cunt. It was as though you were animated, possessed even, as your hands flew into her hair, pushing her head down further and further, to that release you chased violently and madly.

Abby was humble, letting you guide her where you needed her; she was soft at first, but you didn’t want soft, you wanted more.

She obliged.

The blonde slipped her fingers between your thighs and parted your slit, opening up an endless, waiting tightness. She was intrepid, pressing through your clenching muscle and opening you up more than you had ever done; thick digits tearing through you, fucking your pussy at an unforgiving pace, concentration forming in the muscles of her neck. You hid an inhuman growl in the pit of your throat, in the crook of your sweatered elbow, and she moaned out, satisfied with that which she had created inside of you. You were fucking her face in a tight, dirty closet, calf propped over a muscled shoulder for support, the heel of your booties pressing into the wall, locking her in.

It was as though the two of you were fighting, every roll of your hips she chased with her head, every time you shied away from the pleasure she held you harder, taking you even hungrier, diving deeper to a spot you didn’t know was there; every taut pull at her scalp met with an even tighter grip into the flesh of your plush ass. The pads of her fingers violated the sopping warmth of your cunt, and you clenched your stomach unwittingly, walls flexing, holding her hand there. Drool dripped from between her lips, pooling and soaking down into the fibres of an old shag rug, caked with dust and whatever else.

Your own slipped between your lips before you could suck it back in, and the silver trail bounced, the way it does when it breaks, and the thick drop cascaded down her temple, getting lost in your brow. The piece that was yours snaked down your collarbone and between your breasts and somehow, you felt a connection.

Abby snorted, sucked in a breath as her fingers left you empty. Fuck. She didn’t go for her face, wiping them on the skin of your pussy, they traveled upwards, firm grips on your ass. She rubbed the flesh as though she was throwing clay, stretching the skin between her rough fingers, calluses on her palms coasting over every bump and groove. She had found what she had wanted, craning her neck lower, lower, until you could just barely see her eyes. Her fingertips prodded, greedy, opening your lips, tongue leching against your soft fruit as though she was funneling the juices directly into her mouth. You thought your thighs would give out but she held you, stronger, and you fed her willingly.

Her middle finger dipped down into the slit, collecting juices, stealing a breath from your lungs, you wanted to scream her name but it was caught inside of you, so you stood slack-jawed, fuck drunk as she abused your walls, fucking every ridge painfully slow. The tight hole stretched around the meatiness of her finger, and she hooked it as though she was searching, retreating from the warmth, slick with your nastiest of liquids. Again, she split your ass with one hand, and you clenched your tightest hole without thinking about it.

“Don’t worry,” She said, muffled against your mound as she latched against it once more, “gonna help you so fucking good.” You were confused, but you trusted her, a complete stranger. For a second you began to ask what there was to worry about, but your mind was pried away from you as you felt the pressure of her coated fingertip tracing around your asshole. A gentle kiss played at the head of your pussy, comforting you as you nodded your head wildly, something of a ‘yes’ flying from your throat as her middle finger parted that threshold.

Your mind exploded, head shooting straight up into the air, a small yelp burning into a silent open-mouthed cry. You were spinning, the room was spinning, your body heated up instantly. Then, the wet warmth traveled back to your clit, her opposite hand nestling two fingers into your aching, needy twat, her tongue lapping as her fingers resumed digging and that one damned finger fucked in and out of your tightest hole painfully slow.

She fucked you like an animal; you cried out like a bitch in heat. The music trembled through your ears, and you were afraid it wouldn’t be enough, that everyone would hear, everyone would know. You were both drunk and this didn’t matter, didn’t mean anything, but she was bottoming her tongue out in you and you wanted it to mean a lot. Girls talked and you fucking hated them all. She was loose, she got around, and you wanted to be hers.

You wanted to capture her and be interesting to her and walk with her hand on your lower back around campus. Wanted her callused fist in your hair, around your neck as she took you every night. Wanted badly to fucking cum, to open the portal, to wash her face with this unholy water, wanted to kiss wet lips and taste everything. Wanted to know if she could ever like you, after you gave it up, quickly, bellowing like a foghorn against a rack of coats. You wanted to be kept, to keep her spit inside of you like a keepsake but she sucked it back in a quick second, before you could even feel her cheeks hollow between your thighs, and felt dirty for even thinking of it.

A sweet pain formed between your thighs and you couldn’t stop the groan that rose from your throat, every muscle in your face clenching and unclenching, your eyes crossing as your orgasm came quickly into view. Abby fucked you through it, fingers slow and forgiving. It was as though a stream of slowly descending tidal waves were crashing against you, and you needed more, it hurt but you needed more. Something deep burned inside of you, endlessly hot, and you wondered how she could stand the heat as she hit it over and over again. You sobbed, and swore that you could feel a tear roll down your cheek, feeling the need to rub your eyes for good measure.

She looked up, entranced, face softening for a second, watching as you gave up your mind to your body. There was a hard knock at the door, the music lowered a decibel, silence filling the two of you, her fingers still deep inside of your two holes. A sing-song voice bellowed out ‘five minutes!’ and the darkness ridged her eyes.

For the first time, her voice was hard, removing her hand from your cunt, making sure to curl the one in your ass tighter in compensation. She slammed the door twice with her fist, the frame bulging in a way that made you fear the whole thing would just fall down. “Fuck off.” Her voice was loud enough to tear through the uncomfortable tension. There was an apprehensive, ‘woah man,’ that you could barely hear, and the music regained, the party rejoiced, and hopefully, the fear of God being struck enough in your host to leave well enough alone.

Her lips were still slick, soft, kissable with your juices. She flashed you a genuine, pretty smile. Her hands gripped a little too tight but you wanted it all. She looked down at the mess between your trembling thighs, then at your heavy, panting face. She leaned back on her heels as a wide smile played on her face, satisfied with herself. A windy chuckle passed through her glistening lips, wiping her mouth and chin on the inside of her hoodie. “Fuckin’ insane.” She breathed out in between pants.

“Abby.” She said, as though the strength of your orgasm traveled through your brain and made you forget the events of the last 15 minutes. “Constance Hall. Dorm 425 on the second floor.” It was as though your heart skipped a beat, but you punched it down, a weak smile playing against your lips.

She was fucking disheveled, almost inhaling the last sweet smells of your pussy, creating a memory of the flavour and filing it away in her mind for safekeeping. She was delicate, pulling your white panties up to your thighs again, soothing a finger where those soft, curly pussy hairs were hidden again. She let down her hands, skirt furling down, covering the marks of dark possession that she left behind. “Come see me again sometime, ‘kay?” She chuckled, giggled even, and that glint in her eyes was enough to make you faint.

She stood up, waiting for you to compose yourself and straighten everything out before she pushed open the now-unlocked door and peeked her head out.

Jordan was already on her as the door flew open, and you could hear his hushed nosiness as you hugged the wall and tried to act casual, eyes locked on her retreating back as she reentered the room, light haloing her. ‘So what happened?’ you swore his lips read, and your stomach dropped. But she cut through his questions, loud enough for you to hear, convincing enough that he wouldn’t have anything to run his mouth about later on.

“Nothing man, we were just talking.”

Maybe she was actually just that charming.

Yeah.

#tiki writes #abby x reader #abby anderson x fem reader #abby anderson ff #abby anderson x reader #abby anderson smut #abby tlou #abby tlou smut #abby smut #abby anderson x female reader

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emeraldspiral · 8 months

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I know a lot of people like to do Invader Zim crossovers with Gravity Falls and Paranorman so Dib can be paired up with some boys his age who are into hunting ghosts and cryptids and the supernatural and stuff. But I feel like yall are sleeping on the most obvious universe where he'd fit in: Danny Phantom.

Like, Dib would fucking love Danny's parents. They're living his dream. They're not just running around in the woods scribbling notes in a loose leaf journal, they're building high-tech devices designed to help them capture, study, and better understand what ghosts are and what they can do and what other kinds of applications ghost energy and ectoplasm and shit can have. And they know what it's like to have to their chosen field mocked and dismissed and discredited as legitimate science for most of their lives before ghosts became a commonly accepted fact of reality in their world. Danny's parents would love his curiosity and enthusiasm for their work and he'd love having some actual good role models in the paranormal community. I feel like if he spent enough time around them he'd really start to see how bad of a parent Membrane actually is and develop a healthy disrespect that allows him to finally break free of his need to impress him.

I think he'd get along fine with Danny himself too. They're only two years apart in age and Dib's a pretty tough, self-reliant kid so he wouldn't be the annoying tag-along child Danny has to protect, he'd be an actual useful ally. And I think having Dib around would motivate Danny to mature more as a hero to set a good example for him, and that would maybe help Dib learn to be less of an asshole when dealing with Zim.

#invader zim #danny phantom #dib #dib membrane #danny fenton #maddie fenton #jack fenton

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sorchathered · 3 months

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In your love (part 2 of something in the orange🧡)

Pairing- Robert (Bob) Floyd x medic reader

Summary- Deployments had always been risky, this one more so than others. Bob is on edge and feeling his mortality, all he wants is to bury himself in his wife and forget the pain for a little while.

Warnings- this is 100% filth yall, smutty smut minors dni and wrap it up if ya know what I mean. Mentions of death, injuries, ptsd.

A/N- This is a part 2 of Something in the Orange, if you haven’t read it yet check it out here. Can be read without!

You could see the carrier in the distance, nervously rocking on the balls of your feet near the dock and you were dizzy with the anticipation of what was to come. Your husband had been gone 6 months on a deployment that had originally started as two. It had been an honor to be chosen from a select few pilots and WSO’s but it had broken both your hearts for you to have to stay behind with the rest of the squad. You’d moved to San Diego nearly two years before to be the Chief Medical Officer for the Dagger Squad, reuniting with the love of your life Lt. Robert Floyd. It hadn’t been long before he was on one knee, and then even less time for the two of you to head to the altar, life was too short and you’d spent too long apart to wait for the perfect time. This mission in particular had been more dangerous than others, sometimes going weeks at a time without contact and from what you had heard from the carrier there’d been significant injuries and one casualty. He’d been on edge the last few calls you’d gotten, his normal bright demeanor overpowered by short snappy answers, but he’d been quick to apologize in the next breath because that was just who Robert Floyd was; unwaveringly kind even when everything was going to shit.

You knew this reunion would be different than others and you had already been mentally preparing yourself for the weekend ahead. Prepped all his favorite meals and snacks so they could be easily accessible, bought almost an entire paycheck’s worth of fancy lingerie and primped and prepped every inch of your body to look like a perfect little housewife when he crossed the dock to meet you. He would need control after the time away and you would give him anything he wanted until he was completely sated and at peace.

He’d been pacing the dock since dawn, bunk completely spotless and packed full of nervous energy. This special mission had been too close of a call, two people on the team had been seriously injured after a dangerous ejection, and he and Phoenix were nearly caught in a jet wash during a dogfight that had him feeling his mortality. It had been hard without the rest of the Daggers and his favorite medic to keep them grounded, He needed stability more than ever right now, in all honesty would probably have to see the behavioral health counselor for a few sessions to begin the process of feeling like himself again. None of the squad had been themselves lately, holding themselves together by a thread just so they could get home to their loved ones. He could see the dock now, and his phone lit up with a text from you.

“I can see the carrier, I’ll be waiting near the lot for you baby.”

He quickly replied with trembling fingers, “Be ready for me sugar, I’ve missed you so much.”

You felt a chill run down your spine as you read the message, the anticipation was getting the better of you squeezing your thighs together in your tiny pink sundress for some relief.

It felt like ages as he milled through the crowd, everyone rushing to meet their loved ones made the air suffocatingly heavy. He couldn’t blame them truly, if it had been a run of the mill deployment he would have wanted the same from you, but his skin was on fire and he couldn’t get out of this crowd fast enough. He caught Natasha and her girlfriend on the way out to the lot, hugging them both quickly knowing she was no doubt as weary as he was. As the crowd began to clear he finally saw you, leaning against his old truck anxiously scanning the throngs of people for him. The moment your eyes met you were on the move, rushing for him as he dropped his duffle and caught you around the waist. He breathed you in as you cried into his shoulder, you smelled like your strawberry perfume and he let it ground him. He was home, you were both safe, and everything would be ok.

He’d dropped his bags and said hello to your menagerie of animals, before plopping himself down on the couch with a heavy sigh. He made to unlace his boots but you stilled his hands, settling on your knees while you helped him remove them both. He leaned forward to steal a kiss, he’d meant it to be innocent really, but once he’d tasted your lips he needed more, hauling you up into his lap while you both disrobed with urgency, moans spilling from your lips as he tasted your tongue and slid his hands underneath your dress to find you bare for him.

“Oh good girl, you knew exactly what I needed didn’t you baby?” He said as you nodded furiously and made to remove him from his flight suit, dragging it and his briefs to his ankles. “Use me Robby, let it all out it’s ok sweetheart your home with me you’re safe now” you said as you settled back into his lap and he couldn’t hold back anymore, sliding into you was like heaven, warm, wet heat enveloping him as he fucked you hard, both of you falling over the edge in a matter of minutes, Bob stifling a cry as he bit down on your shoulder, tears of relief in both of your eyes.

You showered together which resulted in you on your knees, he hadn’t planned to need you again so quickly but his body clearly had other plans. Once you were both clean and comfortable you sat in his lap and fed him dinner, and once again he felt that familiar feeling take over, pushing the plates and cups out of the way so that he could spread you out across the table, unwrapping you from your robe like a Christmas present as his hands and mouth roamed over your neck and shoulders, littering more bruises along your collarbones and the tops of your breasts before sucking a nipple into his mouth. You whined his name and pushed your chest into him as he licked and sucked there, then paid equal attention to the other. You were desperate for him as you wrapped your legs around his waist and he could feel you dripping onto his abs and leaving a wet patch over the top of his briefs while you grinded on him to find some relief.

“Please Robby, I need more- so good baby please” you fussed and moaned restlessly but he wasn’t letting up, he hadn’t tasted your skin in months and he was going to take all night if that’s what he desired, and he knew you’d let him because you needed him just as much.

He slipped his index and middle finger into your mouth to soothe you as he hushed you, beginning his descent toward your soaking wet pussy. When he finally wrapped his lips around your throbbing clit you sobbed, tears pooling from your eyes and he’d be lying if he said it didn’t make him impossibly harder watching you cry from pleasure. You’d always told him he went down on you like he was starving, you being the only thing that could fill that void and you couldn’t be more right. He relished in it, the noises you made, the taste of your arousal as he licked you from your hole to clit, the way you trembled and grasped his hair, all of it was the best medicine for what ailed him. You were so close, shaking thighs and sweaty limbs as you babbled nonsense at him and he had a brief thought to edge you a little longer, see how mad he could truly drive you but you’d been so good for him today so he gave in as you begged and begged for him to let you cum.

“Ok pretty baby, it’s ok shhh ‘m gonna give you what you want sweet girl” he murmured into you and then slipped his two fingers from your mouth into your aching cunt. Your back came off the table and you gasped out a shocked cry, gushing onto his hands and into his mouth, it felt like you had been pulled from your body and you couldn’t seem to come down from your high, vision blacking out at the corners and you were sure you’d lost consciousness. Bob was kissing you, that was one thing you were sure of, but you couldn’t seem to form words or use your hands to reach for him and he just chuckled at your feeble attempts to reciprocate his affections.

When you finally settled for the night he’d pulled you tightly to his body, desperate to keep the nightmares at bay with your warm embrace. Eventually he would talk about it all, how he’d thought he’d never see you again, the thought of leaving you and the baby girl you were carrying bringing a fear he’d never known to the surface. Hand pressed to your stomach as he felt her little flutters and kicks the tears finally flowed freely, his whole world was here in this bed, everything he’d ever dreamed of.

Words of reassurance and kisses pressed into his chest were enough to finally send him off to sleep, dreams no longer filled with longing, but full of hope.

Tagging people who might be interested- @mamamaystbr @mamachasesmayhem @sailor-aviator @bobgasm @floydsmuse @floydsglasses @attapullman @sebsxphia

#top gun maverick #robert bob floyd fic #robert floyd imagine #robert floyd x reader #robert floyd x you #robert bob floyd x reader #robert floyd #robert bob floyd #bob floyd imagine #bob floyd blurb #bob floyd fic #bob fucks #bob floyd smut #top gun maverick fanfiction #top gun bob #Bob Floyd

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twirlingsmilingwriting · 5 months

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Can't you see the Starlight? || Finnick Odair X Reader

"Look at you worrying to much about things you can't change, you'll spend your whole life singing the blues if you keep thinking that way"

Getting dragged to a capital party to satisfy your mothers wishes could not have gone any better when you get asked to dance with the capital darling, Finnick Odair.

Warnings: Fluffy, mentions of death, kissing, dancing, fem! reader, alcohol mentioned, Finnick getting humbled A LOT

Word Count: 4.7K

A/N: I knowwwww I know yall have been asking for more Coriolanus Snow content but I needed some Finnick fluff in my life I love him so much. Might write more parts to this if yall like it :D

The music was so loud I swear I would be able to hear it ringing in my ears for the next days to come. Everyone was dressed to the nines and other girls scurried past me in large, sparkling, extravagant gowns shaped like cupcakes. Awkwardly, I stood there watching the people dance and talk.

This was my first time going to a capital party. My mother decided I spent enough time locked in my room and decided to drag me along to the party.

She had barged in that morning and said, "Y/N it is not normal for a girl your age to have no other friends other than her dog. You're in university. You should be in the club but instead your here. I'm sorry Sweetheart but that is just sad." I understood where she was coming from. It's not even that I don't like being outside, I love it actually. I love going on walks and watching the birds in the trees or even reading in the park and watching the leaves fall. All of that stuff is so much fun. The thing I don't like is the constant judgment from the other people in the capital. My family used to be incredibly wealthy, so much so my father had a hand in a big part of the economy of all of Panem. He was also deeply tied to political affairs in Panem, often having meetings with President Snow. My mother said they went to school together. But when my father died suddenly and mysteriously, our business had plummeted. My mother, bless her soul, tried to step up and handle things but our financial status had gone down significantly.

In all truth, we weren't doing well at all and the pretentious shallowness of the other capital citizens only viewed you as the numbers in your bank account. My mom could barely pay the tuition for the University I'm attending. I felt like an imposter at this party. I know these people think less of me and it's so uncomfortable. It's not even the stares, it's more the lack thereof. I wasn't perceived at all because the other people at this party didn't think I was worth their time. I played with the fabric of my silk red dress awkwardly while I watched my mom chatter with another woman her age at a table across from where I was. Sighing heavily, I closed my eyes and pretended to be anywhere else.

Suddenly, I was pulled out of my daze by a hand on my left shoulder and someone's breath on my right. I jumped and turned around, my gaze being met with the most marvelous pair of sea-green eyes. The man took a step back.

"I'm sorry, did I frighten you?" he chuckled.

I didn't respond, just gave him a confused, almost disgusted glace. He scoffed a little and let a smirk run across his face while extending his hand out.

"I'm delighted to make your acquaintance Ms..." He looked at me with curious eyes, wanting me to finish his sentence. Cautiously, I reached my hand out to meet his, never breaking eye contact.

"Y/N, Y/N L/N."

He shook my hand shortly and firmly. His smirk turned into a charming smile, exposing his charmingly crooked white teeth and dimples. I squinted my eyes at him, examining his face. I felt like I knew him from somewhere, he looked so familiar. His smile started to fade, I think he was a little offended by my glares.

"I'm sorry but do I know you from somewhere?"

A loud laugh left his mouth.

"I'd be more surprised if you didn't haha, do the Hunger Games ring a bell?"

"Gasp... Peeta Mellark?!"

Excitement started to rush through my veins. My eyes lit up and I started to get all giddy. I loved Katniss and Peeta's games. They just finished last week actually. It was really the only one I tuned into and actually paid attention to, I was too invested, enthralled even with their romance. God, I was such a sucker for romance. Peeta looks so different in real life. A lot taller actually. Blond as ever though.

"I- no... Finnick. Finnick Odair." He looked at me a little offended and confused. Now this was awkward. I calmed myself down and shook my head.

"Hmm, I can't say they do Mr. Odair." I glanced around and noticed the number of eyes that were on us, "Though from the amount of girls around here who look like they want to tear you apart, I'm going to assume you're famous or something."

"Ha, well I guess you can put it that way, what a way to humble someone Ms. Y/N... Anyways, I came to ask you a simple question, may I have this dance?" He bent at the waist slightly like a prince, his hand reached out for mine waiting for me to accept it, his stunningly green eyes never leaving mine. What a charmer. I laughed a little and looked around again. There was still a few eyes on us but just as many people were enjoying themselves. Something about the joy buzzing off of the other people just gave me this sudden urge to do something I was always taught not to do; let a stranger who just seemed to have the sharpest jawline, dimples, boosted ego, and the absolute deepest sea green eyes take me by the hand and lead me somewhere with even more strangers in a strange place. I'd say the stranger-danger aspect of it all was worrying but the pros of, "ooooo hot man" seemed to outweigh that.

"Well Mr. Odair, it's between that or sitting here for more painstakingly long minutes so I guess I'll dance with you," flirtatious sarcasm was dripping from my voice but I shot him back a smirk like the one he was giving me. I placed my hand into his and took mental note of how big and rough his hands were compared to mine. In one swift movement, he stood up straight again and interlocked his arm with mine.

"I'll make it worth your while," He joked and I rolled my eyes in response. For being an outdoor event, the area felt so claustrophobic with the amount of people around. The heat radiating off of everyone was unbearable, the aroma was sticky. Finnick held my arm close to him, afraid to lose me in the crowd. I could feel my face getting hot and I couldn't tell if I was flustered from the sudden male attention or if the heat was getting to me. Soon enough, we reached a small clearing, just big enough for the two of us and I felt Finnick let go of my arm and spin me around so now I was facing him. The way he was looking at me made me feel all warm and gooshy, ugh I hated it. With half-lidded eyes and that smirk that was starting to become oh so familiar, he placed one of his hands on the small of my back, pulling me close to him, and the other interlocking with my hand, extending them outwards.

I tried to pull every amount of falsified confidence out of the depths of my soul when I placed my other hand to meet his shoulder. In theory, this should've gone smoothly but I was so nervous my hand was shaking on the way up, none of my fake confidence could cover that one up. He started laughing and I cringed so hard. I looked down at the ground and my legs wobbled a little when I felt my posture start to slip in these heels. I wanted nothing more than to melt into a puddle of nothingness.

"Oh Ms. Y/N... you sure have a lot of bark for a girl who can't even stand up straight. My presence must be too intoxicating for you to handle."

"Ha. Ha. Ha. And you sure have a lot of confidence for a 'Famous' man I didn't even recognize."

"Ouch, dear let's hold off on that one, now please..." his hand lifted off the small of my back and I felt his fingers under my chin, lifting it to look at him.

"Look at me when I talk to you, it's rude not to"

His hand returned to my back and I stared at him flabbergasted. This man had such a hold on me, literally and figuratively, and I had just met him. This was crazy.

"Oh you're dangerous Mr. Odair," I whispered a little too loud for my liking. He heard it and started to laugh again. God that laugh was like the best sound I've ever heard.

"Trust me darling, I'm a daydream. Now, are we gonna start dancing or are you just going to sit here and stare at me while I get lost in your eyes."

Oh, this absolute weenie. Now I knew I was blushing. His facial expression was the embodiment of pride. It was like he was so accomplished in getting me so flustered. Suddenly, the reality of what was happening sank upon me and so did the remembrance that I didn't know how to dance. Smiling awkwardly at him I started to try and uncomfortably sway our bodies in an off-rhythm pace. His mouth formed an 'O' shape of realization like he just read my mind.

"Just follow my lead,"

He started to move his feet and I followed along one step behind him. I was fumbling over my self a lot but he whispered little encouragements into my ear over the party music. Soon enough, I was working in perfect rhythm alongside him and things started to get a little more fun.

"Look at you, good girl. You caught on so fast,"

Oh god, how can someone be so charming? His presence was almost intoxicating. I turned my head again to avoid eye contact. If I stared into those green eyes for a moment longer I would surely fall into the depths of them and never be able to get out.

"Don't get shy now, darling. Come on," he teased before pulling me closer. My chest was pressed up against him and my eyes widened. Looking up at him slowly, I simply hit him with a shining smile. "Who me? Shy? Never, I'm clearly the most outgoing and social girl out there, that's exactly why I was standing at that table by myself for so long," I joked sarcastically and he rolled his eyes. The song changed and blasted through the speaker and played yet another slow dance song. I groaned and his ears perked up. He swooped in to take that as an oppertunity to ask,

"Are you bored yet?"

"Do you want the honest answer or the delusional one?"

"I'd rather us start our relationship with honesty so I'll go with the first option."

I swear, did this man ever stop smiling?

"Relationship? You're talking crazy Mr. Odair... but to be honest, I'm a little bored... Just a little."

He chuckled a little and continued to lead our bodies elegantly across the dance floor.

"How about we get out of here after this song? There's a lake a short walk down from here, we can go watch the stars."

"Oh Mr. Odair, you better not be trying to murder me... it's okay you don't have to drop everything for me. Clearly, you're enjoying the party."

"Don't worry... You can trust me and it's less that I'm enjoying the party and more that I'm enjoying you"

"You tease~"

"And without giving away too many details... You'd be doing me a favor getting me out of here," he spoke with a changed demeanor, a slightly grim and sad one at that. I brushed it off and nodded.

"So it's a deal?"

"Deal."

He smiled and then pulled away from me, lifting my hand. I understood the assignment and did a little spin, feeling my dress float a little around me. I giggled and spun back into his arms. While my dancing was still quite stiff, I felt so happy. He pulled me close and we helplessly gazed into each others eyes. The song ended and the music dwindled and he pulled away, smiling uncontrollably.

"Stop looking at me like that~ you're giving me the creeps," I teased and giggled, playfully hitting his slightly exposed chest from the V-neck of his white flowy top. He threw his head back laughing before extending his hand out to me again for the second time that night.

"Creeps? I'm sure you mean "Oh Finnick, stop killing me with that beautifully charming, elegant, and stunning smile"'

I huffed and rolled my eyes.

"Are we heading out now?"

"After you."

Words just seemed to roll right off his tongue like honey dripping off a warm spoon, shockingly sweet and smooth. His eyes never left mine. Ever. His hand reached for mine once more and we interlocked fingers while I started to try and find a path off the dance floor. Once we were free from the sweaty dance floor, I turned to Finnick with wide eyes ready for him to lead us down this 'short walk to the lake'. He gladly accepted this task and we walked out the gates of the capital party, not caring if anyone saw us.

As soon as we stepped out of the area I paused for a moment to take a deep breath in. "Oh man I swear it is so hard to breathe in there"

"Oh absolutely. Especially over the heavy perfumes that smell so strong yet can't cover the smell of B.O." Finnick laughed.

"Eww when you put it like that it makes it seem so much worse"

"Oh, but it is that bad let's just be honest here. Like I said earlier, I want this relationship to be started on a foundation of honesty, though, I do love a good secret."

I scrunched my face at his comment and laughed, interlocking my fingers with his again as we looked up ahead of the night in front of us.

"The lake is right down that way," he pointed off to the distance to where we were met with a little stone and dirt path leading. Logically thinking, now was really the time I should be using stranger danger logic. Good thing I wasn't thinking. I grabbed onto Finnick's arm and he started to walk me down the moonlit path. The misty coolness of the nighttime felt so nice on my skin while I cooled off from the party but the warmth of Finnick's arm against my body felt even better. The sound of the music from the party started to get fainter and fainter in the distance.

"So Mr. Odair,"

"Please, just call me Finnick, we aren't around all those fancy people anymore. We can drop the formalities."

"Hmm okay Finnick," I liked the way his name rolled off my tongue and from the way Finnick was grinning and the path in front of us, I think he liked it too. "Where are you from?"

"Wow... you really don't know anything about me huh?" He asked, genuinely so shocked.

"Oh I'm sorry famous-capital-man. How dare I not know how lucky I am to bask in your glory," I rolled my eyes at him.

"Ah that's- that's not what I mean... It's refreshing in a way. It's like with you my reputation doesn't precede me." His tone was open. Honest. He spoke slowly in his last words as if he was searching deep within that beautiful brain of his to pick the right words to say. I didn't respond. On one hand, I was very flattered to see him be so honest. On the other, that sentence was setting off a few more red flags in my mind. What could his reputation be that he finds it enlightening that I don't know who he is? Either way, I brushed off that idea. Finnick seemed like an honest man.

Now that we were alone with just the two of us it felt like his whole demeanor had changed. Inside the gates of the capital party, it felt like he was masking himself a little. It was like he was playing a character, a charming playboy who only had one goal but here, he was still charming but in a different way. His presence reminded me of sitting on the warm sand of a beach watching as the ocean waves crashed into the shore. It draws you in, gives you warmth, and is stunning to look at. I hadn't realized that I had been standing there in silence, lost in my own thoughts, for longer than was comfortable until he continued.

"I'm actually from District 4," He said with a soft smile, a little different from the smirk that usually rested on his face but a lot cuter.

"Really? District 4... So do you like fishing?" Dumb question. I felt the instant cringe rattle my bones after I let those words out. He didn't make a big deal out of it at all though. He laughed a little, "Yeah actually, I don't get around to doing it anymore but I was very good at fishing when I was younger. I'm quite talented with a net."

I feel like there's a joke I'm missing here. I didn't have much more time to psychoanalyze the man because soon enough, we made it to the lake. The moonlight reflected down upon the lake allowing for the beautiful ripples of the water to be seen. The moonlight also shined down on us, being the only source of light in the darkness of this twilight hour. I took a moment to bask in its tranquil beauty as I watched the fireflies dance through the tall grass like little stars that had just dropped down to earth.

"Here it is..." the words left his lips softly and I could feel his eyes staring at my face, trying to read my expression but I was too busy being astonished by the beauty of nature.

"I have lived here my whole life and I have never even heard of or seen this place before..."

He took my hand and led me down to a little clearing in the grass, right above the shore of the lake where we sat down and continued to look around. His head hung down and he looked at his lap, laughing a little before saying, "You must not get out much, huh? Why? I mean, you must have money, why don't you leave and have fun more often?"

"Eh it's not as simple as that, I just... I really can't stand the environment or the attitudes of the people in the capital. They can always find a way to dehumanize another person. After my father passed, my family lost a significant amount of our income and we practically became invisible to the others in the capital. When other people treat you as lesser than or inhuman and like they can do whatever they want to you it's disheartening. The shallowness of other people gets to me too. How am I ever supposed to make friends if they don't care to get to know me? My family just keeps getting hit with trouble after trouble I'm just... I don't know."

I felt a little pathetic rambling on to Finnick. I'm sure he wasn't ready for that kind of trauma dump. My fingers tangled with the hem of my dress and I looked down, examining how my nail polish had chipped at some point during the night. Finnick was silent for a moment. I started to feel even more embarrassed. I didn't need to give him that much information. I was about to open my mouth again to talk about something else but he beat me to it.

"Y/N... Honestly, I understand that on so many levels. Especially as a person who isn't from here but always has to be here for business, I understand fully what you mean but, not everyone is like that and in a way, you're sort of doing the same thing if you're generalizing other capital people like that too... Not to say that you're at fault or anything though but... think about it this way. The way they act is because they were raised that way, truly if you hadn't gone through what you went through you would end up the same way they are,"

His words made me flinch. The idea of being just as shallow as them scared me, deeply. He looked at me, laughed a little, and continued.

"I know I know... This is kind of a hard thing to say, I mean, it's easier to say than to do but, every barrier we cross is another lesson learned. The things we go through turn us into the people we are today and it's our job as people to be people, good people. There is a lot of bad in this world, the least we can do is try to make light with the small things we do. If you spend your whole life worrying too much about the things you can't change, you'll spend your life too stuck in the past and miserable. I was dealt a pretty shitty hand in life but I'm trying to make the best of what I was given and hey, my shitty ass circumstances led me here, with you right now and that seems pretty cool to me"

My heart skipped a beat and I moved my head up to look at Finnick. He was now laying on his back staring up at the sky, head turning to make eye contact with me. I swear this man had a way of reading just the deepest parts of my soul. Deep green eyes met my own and I saw a glimmer, a shine in his eyes that hadn't been there before. A warm smile tugged at the corners of my lips and we sat in silence for a moment, just staring deep into each other's eyes.

"I'd have to agree with you on that one Finnick..." I whispered. He chuckled then turned back to look at the sky.

"Y/N... come join me, the stars are beautiful tonight," He said and patted the ground next to him, ushering me closer. I followed and lay right beside him looking up at the twinkling stars. Normally you can never see the stars so clearly in the capital because of the amount of air and light pollution was so dense but right now, they were shining bright. Maybe things just looked brighter with Finnick next to me. I looked back at Finnick's face, he seemed lost in thought, staring up at the stars.

"Don't you see the starlight? Isn't it crazy to think about how something so far can still be seen be seen by us here? They shine so brightly so that they can bring joy to the rest of the universe. I want to make a change in the world that significant one day. Do something so great that it will bring great joy to everyone for years to come... like even when I die I will be happy knowing there will be happiness after me because of me... I don't know maybe I'm just unrealistically daydreaming right now," Finnick rambled on so confidently but pulled back on that last line. I turned onto my side to look at him, hand coming to stroke the side of his face.

"I- I think you can do it... you're meant for something greater than this Finnick I can feel it..." earnestly, I spoke. While I had just met the man I could just feel this energy radiating off of him. "Sorry if this is sort of sudden but, you have such a pull to you Finnick... You seem to make everything feel like magic when I'm around you. I'm so enchanted by the life you bring to the room and it's actually insane to me. I have been having a great time tonight and I know I wouldn't have had the tiniest bit of enjoyment if I didn't get to meet you tonight. Finnick, you shine brighter than the whole sky and I'm sure you'll make the whole world feel your warmth too."

Finnick didn't speak, maybe I word vomited a little there but I meant every word I said. I swear I could see tears welling up in his troubled eyes before he closed them hard and started to speak. "Truly... those are the kindest words anyone has ever said to me y/n. You don't have any idea how much your sincerity means to me. Thank you" He propped himself up on his elbow to turn to me too. I can't describe what took over me when he finally opened his eyes again. With piercing green eyes and just the hint of a smile on his handsome face, I subconsciously started to lean forward and to my surprise, he was mirroring my actions. It happened so fast, his warm lips were on mine and his free hand found its way to my cheek. The moment was magical, our lips moving in a rhythmic pattern. He pulled away slowly and looked deeply into my eyes while we took a moment to catch our breaths.

"Finnick..."

"Yeah?"

"I think I like you... a lot." My face grew more red with embarrassment while my eyes searched his face for a response. He smiled at me, lips slightly parted before he leaned back in, kissing me a little harsher, lips burning with passion. He lightly placed me on to my back and we continued to share this moment of innocent intimacy while he hovered over me. My fingers tangled in his soft, blond hair and his weight pressed against my body, one of his hands on my face, keeping me close to him, and the other propping himself up. I knew I had to stop myself before this went too far but I really didn't want to. I wanted this night, this moment, to go on forever. Unfortunately, that decision was made for me when he pulled away and looked down on me. The gold shark tooth necklace he was wearing dangled down in front of my face. He smiled again at me. "We should head back to the party now before it gets too late... It'll be more fun I promise," he leaned down to kiss my forehead then came back up, "They play faster-paced music at the end of the night because that's when all the old people go home. You know they might have a heart attack once the bass kicks in," We shared a laugh and he leaned closer to me again, he nuzzled his face into the nook of my neck and placed a soft kiss on my collarbone that sent shivers down my spine. Goosebumps pricked at my skin and his breath tickled as it brushed against my my ear before he whispered, "I like you too y/n... a lot."

I was a blushing mess at this point. He kissed my cheek before sitting back up. He hit me with that charming smile and I pathetically tried to cover my face with my hands but he grabbed my wrists and stopped me.

"No no none of that, I like seeing how flustered you are it's kind of funny."

"Oh boo you asshole," I joked, sitting up and playfully punching his arm. He laughed hard and stood up to his feet, extending his hand out to help me up. Taking his offer, he helped me onto my feet.

With arms linked, we walked away from the lakeside shore and back to the capital party. My eyes searched the room to see if my mom had noticed I left and from the looks of the third empty glass of liquor on the table she was at and the way her eyes were lit up while she continued to chat with the other women her age, she didn't notice a thing. Finnick's hand squeezed mine tightly and gave me a reassuring smile and we walked back onto the dance floor.

By the end of the night, I couldn't tell if it was the intoxicating spirit of Finnick or the amount of times I had spun around the dance floor but I was so dizzy. I could barely think straight but there was only one thing on my mind.

When could I see him again?

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autisticlancemcclain · 5 months

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fic rec friday 59

hello and welcome to fic rec friday! where, on friday, i rec five of my favourite fics.

Lance Denies The Feels by @bleusarcellewrites

“Hey, knock it dead, Sharpshooter.” Keith winks and Lance’s weak. ‘Thanks, I’ll be right back.’ He tries to say, to excuse himself calm and collected so he would exit the training room and go to a corner on a room with no boys with hot mullets, so he can maybe, just maybe, come to terms with the sudden events like a normal person. “You fight good!” Lance shouts instead. [In which Lance isn't aware that he has a crush and the realization hits him hard enough to screams his bi feelings out. On an empty room. Which turns out not to be emtpty. It works out for him in the ends, thanks to a Mulan reference.]

big big fan of fics where lance is so obviously crushing on keith that its just embarrassing for everyone around him. and keiths fond and quiet indulgence fucking -- well. truly gets me every time. also love the clowning he gets from the team lmao

2. See no Evil, Hear no Evil, Speak no Evil by galaxymilk

Lance becomes the vessel for a high-tech Galra weapon that will detonate at the mere mention of its existence. The clock is ticking, Lance, you better think fast.

i read this when i was the tender tender age of fourteen and let me tell you it FUCKED ME UP!!!!!!!!! imagine carrying a bomb in your body that might kill your friends. but if you tell anyone it detonates. that fear? that terror? it is REEKING off the fucking screen. you will read this fic breathless. your heart will make home in your throat. your muscles will cramp in their tenseness. also it features lance bragging about keith to random strangers in the beginning lol

3. When Did This Happen? by memoriesofrain

What do you mean they're together? I thought they were just really close! OR No one knew Hunk and Lance were together and Lance is homesick.

some hance!! yall know i love me some secret relationship. and i love it so much more when its not actually secret relationship and is instead 'yah weve been openly dating this whole time yall are just too dumb to notice' like that one makes me giggle

4. Space Is Cold by corvus (borrowedphrases)

Lance is a pain in the butt, but Hunk loves him and worries about him anyway.

was in my hance era when i was making these bookmarks apparently. and u know what? i was correct. hance is cute as shit. also, 2016 fics will always hold the most specialest of places in my heart. each one of them ate truly. this one is so cute and intimate.

5. Snapshots and Other Bonding Moments by @shyfoxes

Hunk and Lance are constants in each other's lives, and that will never change. Four moments between Lance & Hunk and One moment spent with Team Voltron.

four plus ones!! my beloved!!! small moments of regular life love!!! my beloved!!! 2016 fics!!! my beloved!!! god some of the tags on this thing...nostalgia. anyways. i loved this fic because i have always loved fics diving into the characters' lives prekerb, u know? i want Backstory. also the lilo and stitch references were cute. if youre not a fan of hance, this is pre relationship so can def be read as platonic!! such a cute fic fr

that’s it for today!! i’ll see y’all back next friday for the next fic rec post!!!

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hearts4youz · 7 months

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The Captains Daughter Chapter 11

A/N: kinda rushed this one but a lil more action for ya. Thank yall so much for reading my fic!!

1.5k words

Reader pov:

The next morning at breakfast you were extra groggy. The single off day had thrown off your sleep schedule. Dark circles hung under your eyes, you squinted at the bright light in the mess. You felt a presence behind you, you turned around to reveal Ghost.

"Listen Y/N..." he said in a monotone voice.

"About the other day, at training. I'm sorry." He let out a breath as he said the last word.

You raised an eyebrow.

"You... your sorry?" heat flooded to your cheeks.

"Yeah I... shouldn't have pushed you so hard." This was very unlike him. It felt like the walls were down. You took this opportunity to slip in a joke without getting yelled at.

"You have a heart?" you smirked.

"A cold one" he grunted.

You smiled, you felt like he opened up, like there was some understanding between you two now. Like you were closer. He didn't appear to reciprocate as his face had the same stone cold look. Your mind was taken off of it as everyone else began to gather at the table, talking loudly. Price quickly quieted them down as he cleared his throat to make an announcement.

"Meeting room, right after breakfast. Mission today," he kept it short and sweet.

You finished your breakfast while listening to Gaz and Soap debate on a variety of topics.

"Pineapple belongs on pizza!" Gaz shouted.

"No. It. does. NOT!!!" Soap said, standing up.

Things were just getting interesting, but then your father scolded them. At that point, you decided to throw away your trash and head towards the meeting room. You walked down the corridor and stopped for a moment to look out the window. Snow whirled around, the pine trees outside had icicles dangling from them. It was a truly picturesque scene. It brought you back to years ago, when outside your living room window was a landscape just like this one.

It was a beautiful morning, just like this one. It was a dreamy white Christmas, one you would only see in movies. The family, gathered by the tree, basking in the comfort of each other. The mother, recording the kids opening the presents. The father, just as surprised at the gifts as the kids are. Except, this was not the movies, your mother had left that summer, and your father was slowly recovering. He managed to put together a breakfast for you, the pancakes were burnt, but you knew better than to complain. At this point, you understood that mommy wasn't coming back, and daddy needed his space. Today was especially hard for him, even at your young age, you knew to be extra cheery to try and bring up his spirits. You opened the gifts he bought you, thanking him after each one, until there was one remaining under the tree. He squinted at it.

"I didn't put that one there" He said suspiciously.

"I did!" You said with a grin.

He looked at you, puzzled as you placed the wrapped present in his hands. He tore off the wrapping paper and it almost brought him to tears. He held up a framed picture of the two of you standing together at thanksgiving at your grandparents house. You had on the adorable long sleeve with a cartoon turkey on it, your father wore a polo and nice pants. It was one of the first times he had genuinely smiled since your mother left. The frame was decorated in a kiddish fashion, you had made it yourself at preschool.

"Y/N..." he choked.

"I love it."

You broke into a smile as he was at a loss for words. To this day, that picture sits on top of your mantle. After that day, Price's mood improved tremendously. He no longer spent long hours in his bedroom alone. There were still tough days, but from that moment on, things got better.

Your trance was broken by Gaz's voice, "Y/N come on! the meetings about to start."

"Coming," You said, as you made your way into the meeting room.

The second you sat down, your father began to speak. He talked about today's mission. Your head perked up at the word mission.

This is my chance to prove myself to Ghost, you thought.

Price droned on about the details and you listened intently, not wanting to mess anything up.

"Today's task is simple. Take out a person of interest, and head home. Lets try not to cause a ruckus in the town, alright"

A picture of the man's face was broadcast on the screen at the front of the room. He was quite ugly, with a long scar running down his ghostly pale, blotchy face. If you weren't so focused, you would laugh at that man being considered a threat.

When it was time to board the helicopter, you triple checked your gear, this earned you a laugh from Soap. When you reach the designated area, you follow protocol exactly as you are supposed to. You act exactly like a young, green, recruit, which is slightly embarassing, but hopefully it will pay off when you do something right. Last mission you weren't exactly impressive, this mission, you will prove yourself worthy of working with the 141.

Everyone gathers around as the helicopter drops you off.

"Alright listen up" Price commands.

"Trusted intel says our guy is in a house about 5 miles from here, I had us dropped off here so we can make a discreet entrance. We don't want a repeat of last time around."

"Gaz and Soap will enter through the back when we get there. Ghost, Y/N, and I will go through the front. Understood?"

Everyone nods a yes. You all begin trekking through the woods. Gaz and Soap continue their arguement from earlier.

"YES you can put ranch on pizza!" Soap yells.

"NOO!" Gaz yells.

Everyone chuckles as they carry on, their bickering passes the time.

Hours later, you finally reach the house. It is on the outskirts of a small town, only a few people mill about in the streets. Your group crouches at the edge of the woods to avoid being seen by civilians. Once the coast is clear, You, Ghost, and Price run to the front door, while Soap and Gaz do the same in the back. The team moves almost in sync with each other. They break down the doors on both sides immediately taking enemy fire from the occupants inside. You are severely outnumbered, but this is nothing that the 141 hasn't dealt with before. You do an impressive job, taking out many combatants and helping advance further in the house.

Once the first floor is cleaned out, the team moves up the stairs, there are a lot less soldiers so the next few floors are quick work. When you reach the door where intel says the POI is, it is of course, locked. Gaz takes a step back, winds up, and kicks the spot next to the lock, effectively breaking it. You wait a moment before opening the door, listening for how many are inside.

You find yourself at the front when the door is finally opened. Swallowing your fear, you rush inside, there are multiple soldiers. You fire three rounds, three enemies fall backward onto the floor, blood pouring out of their chests. Soap and Ghost take out a few more.

"Where's the POI?" Price says.

Everyone looks around uneasily.

"He has to be in this building, there's too many soldiers here for there to be nothing of value," you answer.

Everyone backs out of the room through the broken door, but you feel like you're being watched. You decide not to say anything out of fear of being mocked. You decide to bring up the rear of the group so you can watch your six without being questioned for turning around so often.

You give the room a last glance, you are startled by a tall, lanky man, possibly in his early 50's. He points a pistol at you with his finger on the trigger.

Your eyes widen, "DOWN!" You scream.

Without questioning, everyone hits the deck, flattening themselves to the weathered floor as a shot whizzed by overhead. Like lightning, everyone is on their feet again in a flash. Returning fire to the man. Multiple bullets hit him, his body convulses, then crumples to the ground.

"Fucking hell," Ghost sighs as he catches his breath.

Price claps a hand on your shoulder, "Way to watch our backs kiddo." he says with a proud smile.

You release a pent up breath and smile. You slightly relax as Gaz identifies the body as the POI you were after.

"You've done well today, kid," Soap exclaims. Everyone nods in response.

He was right, you did well today. Maybe tomorrow Ghost wouldn't go so hard on you in training. Maybe you could even share a moment together like this morning. Your heart fluttered at the idea of his praise, since it was so rare.

You went to bed happy that night. Exhausted, but happy.

Taglist: @abbiesxox @n30n-j3lly @weird-katthing @kayoyamamegame

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badasmuse · 6 months

Text

“Old Ass”

Simon Dominic x Reader

Warnings: 18+ (MDNI) language, lowercase intended, penetration, oral m!receiving, protected sex, reader is impulsive

Summary: you’re a new artist at aomg and you become besties with simon. yet you end up making fun of his age and that gets you in a tough spot. not like you don’t like it tho

a/n: look yall, there is not enough simon dominic content on this app. it’s time for me to make it. for the smdc girlies🤞🏼

“everyone please welcome AOMG’s new artist, choi y/n. she- where is simon?” the ceo asked.

“i’m here i’m here.” he ran up bending over slightly, hands on his knees trying to catch his breath. “i was in the bathroom you were taking all day.”

“old ass.” devita mumbles, ducking when simon swatted at her.

“this is choi y/n. since you were late, you get to look after her.” he moves you in front of simon gently. “show her around, give her what she needs, make sure she’s comfortable. okay bye.” he walks away.

the other artists disperse and simon sighs, “hey i’m simon. sorry about that.”

you nod, bowing slightly, “no problem. i’m y/n. can i just.. not to fangirl, but you are my favorite aomg rapper.”

simon smiles, “well see now i like you. let’s go i’ll give you a tour of the building.”

he guided you gently with a hand behind your back. not quite touching you, but if you were to stop abruptly his hand would hit your back.

“this is where the dancers practice. i don’t dance so i don’t go in there. you dance?” he asks.

“mhm. i love dancing.” you stick your head into the room looking around. “ooh this is pretty.” you pull back and continue walking.

“this is a vending machine. it sounds uninteresting, however, there’s like three more on the other side of this corner.” he walks you around the corner. “that one is my favorite it has ice cream in it.”

you smile, “can i buy one?”

“i’ll get you one. as a welcome gift.” he puts his card in and let’s you hit whatever option you want. “thank you!” you exclaim grabbing it from the machine as it fell. “this is why you’re my favorite.” you giggle, following him to the studios.

“this is the one i record in. feel free to use it until they get you a permanent spot.” he looks at his watch, “i have to run but here’s my number, call me if you have questions.”

from that day forward, you and simon became two peas in a pod. you both spent a lot of time together. you were always in his studio either watching him or recording your own shit. he always helps you out, giving input on the flow and the lyrics.

then he started inviting you to his condo. obviously for group get togethers but then it was just you. you’d drink jack daniels together and you’d end up staying the night. this was a weekly thing. now you have a drawer in his dresser.

you’re used to coming to his house for the night but… tonight was weird. you got a different vibe when you walked in using the key he gave you. you took off your heels and hung up your jacket like always but you didn’t see simon. “si?” you said looking around. where is he?

you walk towards his room, you might’ve beat him here so you’re just gonna change into something comfortable. however, when you approach his door, you hear soft groans. your ears go red and you’re about to leave until you hear your name.

“fuck y/n why can’t this be your hand..” he grunts.

you peek your head through the door and see him thrusting his dick into his hand almost desperately. you watch for a good minute undetected, but your stupid watch just had to ding letting you know you got a notification. damn snitch.

he stops and looks up at the door, “how.. long have you been standing there?” he says tucking himself back into his shorts.

“long enough to hear you wish for my hand.” you respond, walking in and sitting on the bed. “move, let me do it.”

“what- WOAH!” he exclaims when your hand disappears down his shorts.

you smack his hands away when he tries to grab you. “sit still.” your hand moves faster on his dick and he moans louder. “fuck that feels better than i imagined.” he says.

you’re bored now, so you decide to kick it up a notch. you grab a hair tie from your wrist, pulling your hair back so it doesn’t get in your way. he’s confused but when your tongue licks his tip- well he’s not confused but he can’t think. you slowly take him into your mouth, giggling when he grabs your hair. your tongue swirls around his tip when you come back up and he groans louder.

“fuck y/n you’re gonna give me a heart attack with that mouth of yours.” he says when you take him all the way down your throat.

“no you’ll have a heart attack cause you’re old. don’t blame me.” you say taking him back in before he could respond.

“shit i’m gonna cum.” he groans, now fucking into your mouth, and you take it cause momma didn’t raise no bitch. he cums down your throat and you swallow it all.

he’s not too sure what to say or do. he just lays there awkwardly.

“all that talk you do in your songs and now you’re gonna act awkward?” you say pushing him.

“um.. thank you?” he says uncertainly.

you sigh and stand up walking to his bedside table. “do you have any condoms? honestly i wanna fuck and i’m not on the pill.” you looked through his drawers and pull one out. “can we? or can your old ass not take it?”

he grabs you by your shirt, yanking you on the bed before turning you over on your stomach and pulling your ass in the air.

“there’s the simon i know from his music.” you giggle as he pulls your skirt up over your ass. he then reached into the drawer and pulled out a pair of scissors. “what the fuck are you doing?”

“don’t feel like ripping them.” is all he says before he slides the scissors under and cuts your underwear.

“simon! tf what if you cut me?”

he doesn’t say anything, he puts on the condom and just pushes into you without a thought causing you to let out a squeal.

“talk too damn much.” he starts pounding into you relentlessly. you hold onto the pillow letting out whines as he hits your gspot over and over.

“god simon just like that.” you whine out, a few tears slipping out.

“damn it’s like.. you were made for me.” simon says as he pushes your upper back down some more thrusting deeper.

“fuck… fuck made for you yeah, i’m gonna cum!” the headboard hits the wall as he speeds up. your vision goes white and you forget how to breathe as you clench tightly around him, cumming when his fingers come in contact with your clit.

he releases in the condom and pulls out. he cleans himself up before grabbing a cloth to clean you up as well. you let out a whimper when the cloth comes in contact with your sensitive clit.

“i’m sorry but you’re gonna be sticky so i have to clean you up.” he mumbles. after he’s finished, he pulls you into his hold patting your head. “there there. you’ll live.”

you don’t have any strength to hit him so instead, “fuck you simon.”

“we did. want to go another round? i can do more with my mouth than just rap.” he lets you go and shimmies down so his face is between your legs.

this is gonna be a long night.

#simon dominic aomg #simon dominic #squidnotes #aomg smut #simon dominic smut #simon dominic x reader #aomg x reader

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obsessedelusional · 1 year

Text

I love you, that’s all that matters

paring ✦ Bella Ramsey x Plus Size Fem!Reader

summary ✦ When fans find out Bella is dating a plus size women, you, most are nothing but evil. Causing you to have anxieties about your relationship. What happens when it’s time for the first public outing at a premiere? This was requested - here

word count ✦

authors note ✦ YALL are so sweet to me. I’m glad y’all are enjoying the Bella lil oneshots I’m putting out. Have a few more ideas for plus size reader so I might make this some kind of series if y’all want that THANKS

masterlist

FEEDBACK AND REBLOGS APPRECIATED!!!

⊹ ꙳ ✦ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹

Time had finally came for you to be Bella’s plus one to The Last of Us season two premiere party. You were so proud of your partner, they were out there doing the damn thing. Selfish is how you felt, the week leading up to the event. Doing everything in your power not to make it obvious that you were nervous, not wanting to ruin Bella’s big moment. This was your first official outing together.

You and Bella had been dating for less than six months. Meeting them as you were part of the hair and makeup team for the show. You had joined the crew for season two. Early morning were spent aging up Bella with your makeup skills. You quickly noticed how often they’d mess up their makeup to have to sit in you chair again. Couldn’t help but wonder if they did it on purpose? Turns out it’s was on purpose.

When filming had wrapped up little did you know Bella was torn up about not making a move. One morning you woke up to a instagram dm, it was Bella asking to take you out. You said yes and the rest was history. The two of you spent every possible moment together. After the first date Bella came over to your home and basically never left. Their apartment was in the UK, you had visited once only to meet their parents and find out Bella was selling her apartment. So she could live full time with you in LA.

“Are you okay, babe?” Bella asks, taking you out of your deep train of thoughts.

“Yeah.” You mutter. Bella approaches you, your sat at your vanity getting ready for tonight.

“Ay do not lie to me,” Bella responds, grasping your face gently so they can get a better look at you.

“You haven’t stopped fidgeting with that same brush for a while now. Every time I walk in here your staring at you reflection, deep in thought. What’s wrong?” Bella was right, you’d been sat here for over an hour and you haven’t even started.

“I’m scared.” Like clock work, the tears start to fall. You apologize for crying only for Bella to tell you it’s okay, pulling you into a tight embrace. Soothing your emotions, running their fingers through you hair.

“There’s no need to be scared baby.” Bella says pulling alway briefly to, wipe away at the tears that had stopped as fast as they started.

—

Your relationship with Bella was private, you were more than happy to have them all to your self. It made it hard to go on dates but you two managed. Normally opting for ordering in and spending the whole night intertwined. That all came to an end when three months into the relationship, you made a mistake. You woke up late after a late night of work to find Bella sat at the kitchen counter, playing on their phone. You do what you normally did, walk up behind them placing sweet kisses down their neck while wrapping your arms around their waist. Normally Bella would reciprocate but this time they didn’t. Causing you to pull away looking at Bella’s phone only to see that they were on instagram live.

“Fuck I’m sorry.” You say, moving out of the way of the camera.

“It’s okay, I gotta go guys.” She says before shutting her phone off, ending the live right then and there. Bella sets her phone down, pulling you into a hug.

“I should of told you.” Bella says.

“I should of used my eyes and seen what your were doing before throwing myself at you in front of thousands.” You sigh, looking to Bella apologizing.

“Don’t ever apologize for throwing your self at me.” She laughs causing you to laugh.

“It was gonna come out sooner or later. It’s fine we’ll deal with it.” Bella smiles reassuring you that everything is okay.

It was okay. Until you opened your instagram later that day, fans recognized you from behind the scenes videos finding you easily. Every social media account of yours was filled with comments about your relationship. Some were nice, most of them nasty.

Most of them directed at your weight. Pointing out how much bigger you were than Bella, like you never noticed. You had noticed quickly but Bella reassured you that they loved you just the way you were. Your whole life you had been bigger, it never bothered you as much as it appeared to bother others. When you were younger, bullies had made you feel bad about your body. As you got older, you worked so hard to learn to love your body. Deciding in that moment to shut off your comments on instagram, deactivating your twitter. Making anything else private.

—

“People are gonna hate me.” You explain why you’re filled with so much anxiety.

“I love you, that’s all that matters.” Bella kissing you softly again. They stand up behind you, letting their hands rest on your shoulders.

“You are beautiful. I love you. If those people were actually my fans, they’d love you too. Anyone who has anything nasty to say about you doesn’t matter to me. What matters is the feelings we have for each other, okay?” Bella is looking at you through the reflection of the mirror sat in front of you. Their words bring a big grin to your face.

“Okay.” You let out a defeated sigh.

Bella spends the rest on the time in the room with you, spread out on the bed. Watching you do your makeup, complimenting you. Hyping you up with ever step in your makeup routine.

“I feel bad this is your big day and you’re doing the most for me.” You say, nearly done getting ready.

“It’s working out great for me. Too distracted by beautifully amazing sexy girlfriend to be nervous about tonight.” They tease, making you smile for the millionth time today.

“You’re too good to me.” You respond. Bella gets up from where they’re laid.

“That’s because you only deserve the best, duh.” They kiss you again, their hands find their way to hips. Pulling you in closer, messing up your lipstick in the process.

“Oh shit we’re gonna have to fix that, huh?” Bella laughs looking at their own reflection. Your red lipstick smeared on their lips.

“How am I supposed to kiss on you? You’re gonna keep getting lipstick on me. With you looking like it’s gonna be so hard.” Bella whines, wiping away at the lipstick.

“You can’t last a few hours?” You shake you head disappointingly.

“Nope.” They say, kissing you one more time.

“One more for the road, I’m done for now.” Bella adds, once they finally find the will to pull away from your lips.

“For now?”

“Just wait till this is over.” They wink before their phone goes off, letting them know the car is here to pick the two of you up.

#bella ramsey fluff #bella ramsey x you #bella ramsey imagine #bella ramsey x reader #bella ramsey pov #bella ramsey #bella ramsey oneshot #bella ramsey x plus size reader

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mugentakeda · 6 months

Note

oh sorry!! misinterpreted!! pls tell me abt his 500 mental illnesses and horrors please

NO UR FINE HEHEHDHSHD i figured id get an ask abt it at some point cus most people dont talk abt iroh in such deranged ways.... but . idk i really just sort of take literal facts abt iroh and stretch them so they become hcs??? and i also take little worldbuilding hcs ive seen other people have and adopt them because it adds spice.

this is gonna get long and crazy cus its just me musing about shitty iroh qualities ive noticed and trying to clown a bit in his pov so im gonna put it all under a cut. read it only if you dare thoughf

first of all. iroh is like a hypocrite among all hypocrites. its funny as it is pathetic. sometimes he knows it and tries to adjust his thinking because after all he DOES actively try to change himself for the better. sometimes he knows it and just doesnt care. maybe feels guilty for not caring, maybe he sometimes doesnt feel guilty. and sometimes he doesnt notice it at all because well. 6 years of changing yourself means what exactly to 30 something years of being one of the biggest baddest fn ghouls???? theres still a lot of unlearning to do, and he thinks he can be all hoity toity grand lotus. like boy bye. i think that if he knew he would work to submit to humility and i say that genuinely but sometimes old fire nation crown prince habits die hard. he wears silk robes under his armor baby. he was the spoiled rotten eldest son!!! theres a way you can balance iroh actively practicing humility but also him being patronizing and holier-than-thou.

iroh spent years and decades believing in the fire nations old cause. i bet yall anything the siege wasnt his only crime, just the biggest and most notorious. and on top of that hed believed that taking down ba sing se was his destiny from a vision that had been sent by the spirits. as if spirits gaf abt war shit humans do like boy youre just delusional and have always been delusional. but im sure that everyone took it seriously cus im p sure fn folk take spirit stuff seriously considering the fire lord is supposed to be like... a god human and his word is divine law or whatever idfk.

lu tens death was world shattering to iroh beyond belief if it managed to break that. iroh is a spiritual guy and takes spirits dead seriously, and if he believed him taking ba sing se was decreed by agni- well. look at how hard it was for zuko to give up those beliefs, and he was only sixteen and his track list is prob mickey mouse size compared to irohs. thats why lu ten being just a mentioned ghost character kinda bothers me cus i think if we knew more abt him itd put just how earth shattering his death was into more perspective. if he meant that much to iroh that it stopped iroh from caring when fn folks care so much about their cause, awful as it is, then he mustve been something special.

as for how iroh is with women i couldnt give you a good answer on that. the fn doesnt really seem to have roles like the nwt so i dont think its a common fn man thing to objectify women. which means thats just an iroh specific thing. which is insane??? but i watch one piece which has sanji in it so ive seen far worse but still. this isnt the objectify women olympics. i think as far as i can remember the only time iroh had been annoying and needed to be curb stomped about it was with june and then every other time it was reciprocated flirting with women his age but i digress. itd be pretty funny if lu tens birth in general almost became a scandal because iroh didnt know who the hell the mother was. This isnt one of his 500 mental illnesses though its just an annoying iroh quality ive noticed. Lets cut his dick off

NOW BACK TO MY FIRST POINT specifically ab him being a hypocrite and knowing it and feeling guilty but also sometimes not feeling guilty. i was talking abt him and azula. I have no idea if iroh knows how similar he and his niece are. frankly i believe itd be funny if he didnt because hes deluded as hell. i know people say oh iroh doesnt like azula bc she reminds him of himself WELL I THINK IROH DOESNT LIKE AZULA BECAUSE SHE REMINDS HIM OF OZAI. as if iroh would compare her to himself!! hes not that gd self aware. which comparing her to ozai is very unfair to azula and stupid i know. and humans do and think things that are very unfair and stupid and hurt the people around them. and its sad and it sucks but thats just how it is. him being the age that he is beefing with a teenager is a bad look and these bad looks are what make iroh whole and human and a shitty uncle. i dont hate him for it but i also think azula can rip his face off like a rabid chimpanzee for it if she felt that way

i think its like, he knows that azula is only 14 and is only doing what ozai teaches her and will just get the short end of the stick at the end of the day because thats just how ozai is, and thats when he feels guilty. but then shes manipulating and pulling zukos emotional strings like hes a puppet and shes rushing in with a smirk thats identical to ozais and shes rushing at zuko and thats when he stops feeling guilty and stops caring about her age and only cares about what she can do and what she will do and attacks her the same way hed attack anyone else. crushing her hand in his own and then kicking her in the face off war ships.

and then i think that guilt about her age and seeing it as just something that war does to even children eventually wears off entirely and all he can see when he looks at her is his own brother, and that means he needs to keep her far away from zuko no matter what. so yeah i think he really meant it when he said he thinks azula is crazy and that she needs to go down and no i dont think hed have too much of an issue with being the one to do that if it meant zukos safety. how does iroh feel like shit over lu ten dying but not over the idea of possibly killing his niece? couldnt tell you. i know a lot of people think its misogyny on irohs part and i mean. maybe?????? but i honestly dont think so. i think blaming it on misogyny actually makes their beef less intriguing, if anything. i think he just hates azula for azula.

and i dont even think comparing azula to ozai is something he only does with azula. i bet there are times where zuko shows his soft side and instead of being filled with love and admiration for his nephew who is compassionate despite it all, the first thing that comes to his head is look at that, look at how hes not entirely like ozai, theres still hope for an honorable and idealistic leader for our nation in the future. like i said before, old habits die hard. sometimes iroh Has to think like a general with his family for the wellbeing of literally everyone else on the planet but in moments like that, its just unfair to zuko as his nephew. thats something i dont think he even realizes is bad of him as an uncle- that hes made himself one of many people that only ever compare zuko to the shadows of his family members that loom over them.

which then moves us to the question of, do i think iroh projects his feelings about lu ten onto zuko. my answer? sort of yes?? but sort of no?? sort of no because zuko makes that impossible. even if i personally hc that there was a lot of lu ten that iroh didnt know, the lu ten that iroh knew couldnt be anymore different than zuko. so iroh cant use the same parenting techniques on zuko, he cant have the same quiet and casual moments with zuko, theres no teasing and banter and rough housing with zuko. lu ten had been self assured in the way a boy can be when he has a father that doesnt instill fear into him.

However comma. i think that paternal love and adoration is the same as the kind he had for lu ten. that protectiveness is the same. theres the amused affection at how similar lu ten and zukos stubborness is, how expressive their irritation is- the way they both flail their hands around and in the air whenever they get frustrated. their undying dedication, the honor and belief in justice. it took iroh forever to see the similarities, only until he got to know zuko a little better aboard the ship. its the same feelings and most of the time that new love makes iroh feel new.

but i also think that sometimes its agony. sometimes that desperation and mourning of lu ten, wishing there was something, anything, iroh could do or give to bring him back, manifests in the form of if zukos wellbeing isnt at a certain standard at all times im going to lose my mind. its one thing for zuko, who is young and hurting, to be codependent on iroh. its another for iroh to be codependent on zuko. he hopes zuko never stops thinking iroh is just a worrywart, that iroh is just kind of overbearing in the way annoying grown ups are, because if he ever stopped and saw the truth, the terrified desperation that iroh has to make sure zuko gets out of this year alive??? i dont even know what iroh would do if zuko died during the show if im being honest. thats something thats beyond my comprehension lol.

i think for a while irohs dedication is this gross mix of codependency onto zuko and zukos overall wellbeing, but also this weird convoluted mess of guilt over lu ten that he doesnt want to relive with his nephew so this is like.... something he thinks he owes zuko. which hurts and sucks but i think those two things can and do co exist. i dont think irohs love for zuko becomes entirely uneffected by lu ten and the loss of lu ten until like. literally book 3.

and im serious about that too i think the "owing zuko something" bit had been stronger in book 1 when iroh had been more apathetic but then in book 2 when iroh was literally Living in lu tens grave site and im pretty sure even losing sight of zuko in ba sing se would be enough to freak iroh out. irohs a general and a genius in strategy, but the instincts of a parent- a stressed one, because you cant tell me that just because iroh is endeared by the people of ba sing se that thats enough to qwell his fears- squashes all of that into dust. hes living in the grave site of his son. him and zuko could be recognized. his contacts warned him of the dai li and long feng. he only truly relaxes until zuko comes back through the door. he only truly sleeps well when he can feel his nephews bright and alive chi near him.

and i think that when he mourns lu ten and is scared for zukos life in the earth kingdom he hates himself more than hes ever hated himself ever since losing lu ten in the first place. the personal killer of so many earth kingdom sons, so many earth kingdom fathers lives that he personally ruined, and here he is, alive.

But then thats when rationality and humility leaves him and that royal selfishness shows itself- he knows hes the one at fault- the murderer of earth kingdom sons of all ages, daughters of all ages, elderly, mothers and fathers, babies and toddlers, homeless that dont have the means to scurry to the inner walls and hide in homes, family pets and family livestock, ash and blood in the water that they need to drink and cook the food they had left with, running out of supplies, running out of the medicine pregnant mothers need to ease their pain during labor, medicine needed to perform amputations from violent and infected burns, sickness thats bound to show while under siege and cut off from the rest of the world, entire bloodlines ended, brains and blood and body parts covered in ash and littering the streets that he now walks as a fugitive.

its all his fault and yet hes still so angry at himself and the world and his god damned family, he wants his god damned son back. he tries to be a good example for his nephew who has so much to learn still, the world depends on his nephew learning the things this uncle is trying to teach him-but hidden poorly under the mask of a wise and worldly old man, he wants to have his cake and eat it too. he tries so hard to change and be humble and think beyond his own interests the way a grand lotus ought to, but when the gap in his chest left behind by his son that he murdered, that wouldn't be dead if it werent for his sorry excuse of a father, starts to ache so tangibly he almost wants to keel over and vomit.

SO . yeah i think that theres a way to balance irohs many lovely facets. his calm and collected mentor side that is observant and patient with the angriest teenage boy on earth, his ridiculous side that does stupid annoying shit to spite and tease his nephew, his protective and nuturing side that adores his nephew and wants him to be happy, his snobby pretentious ex crown prince side that thinks achieving peak open mindedness is joining a secret society with dudes like pakku, his angry and hateful side that did so many cruel things yet learned what fire can really mean from the masters but is still selfish and also wants seconds out of his self made grief despite taking the first plates from others and cant even bring himself to care, his manipulative side that earned him a reputation in the snake nest that is definitely the fire nation nobility and court, his hypocritical side that hates azula for the same reasons he hates his brother and hates himself but somehow cant fathom correlating himself with his niece.

Hes the worst hes the best hes my favorite hes my worst enemy. when do you ever get a character as ill as iroh at irohs age??? its always the mentally ill 20 something anime dude. never the shitty old man. im so insane

#what can i do to convince you guys that on my top 5 list sokka actually places before iroh #Nothing most likely. whatever #i hope this whole essay is entirely nonsensical to you all #asks

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