dollmillk

[dollmillk]

sorry for being inactive.

been struggling a lot.

[dollmillk]

the holidays were hard

#anamia #ed journal #ed goals #ed advice #tw ed account #just ed shit #tw ed thoughts #tw ed related #ed #ana #tw ana things

[dollmillk]

ƸӜƷ

[dollmillk]

lost the weight again.

cannot afford to let that bullshit happen again. i haven’t ate in two days after weening myself off food again.

if anyone has any advice on how to burn through my fat faster, please let me know. my progress is slowing down and i need help.

#anamia #ed journal #ed goals #ed advice #ed coach #tw ed account #tw ana things #just ed shit #tw ed thoughts #tw ed related #ana #pr0 @na #thinspo #thinsinpiration

[dollmillk]

like a stupid pig i gained 2 kg back during my birthday celebrations

i feel so fucking gross and heavy and it’s like i’m poisoning myself which i don’t think makes any sense. anyway.

i hate the way eating makes me feel.

#anamia #ed journal #ed goals #tw ana things #tw ed thoughts #tw ed related #thin inspo #thinsinpiration #thinspo #ana #just ed shit #ed #meanspo

[dollmillk]

i love tight lacing so much and with my weight loss my waist is starting to look smaller and smaller and it’s so doll like and pretty 🥰

#anamia #ed journal #tw ed thoughts #tw ed account #ed goals #ed advice #ed #just ed shit #ana #tw ana things #thinsinpiration #thinspo

[dollmillk]

just weighed myself again after my post.

i dropped 2.27 kg in 2 days. i’m so thrilled

#anamia #ed journal #tw ed thoughts #tw ed account #ed goals #ed advice #ed #just ed shit #tw ed related #tw ana things #ana #thinsinpiration #thinspo

[dollmillk]

i didn’t eat yesterday at all.

normally if i’m working i’ll eat something really tiny like a pickle or a few bites of chicken just to have something so i don’t get faint in the heat of the kitchen. i’ve always wanted to feel that faint empty feeling but i don’t handle discomfort very well at all.

i lasted really well until about 830pm and my brain got all fuzzy and everything got really hot and i wasn’t able to walk very well cause it was so fucking hot and it wasn’t helping at all. the heat with the faintness made me nauseous cause i’m a lil pussy and i ended up throwing up a few times. (just all my water and then this morning i threw up stomach acid so i’ve hit the bottom.)

my coworkers who noticed my relapse tried to get me to eat but that sent me into a panic when they slapped food down in front of me. i started crying and that embarrassed me but the way they held me and told me i was going to be just fine. that i’m beautiful and that i didn’t have so anything hard for the rest of the shift during break down was so nice.

even though i was miserable, all i could keep saying to myself with a smile was that i’m going to be so pretty.

#anamia #ed journal #tw ed thoughts #tw ed account #ed goals #ed advice #ed #just ed shit #ana #tw ana things #thinsinpiration #thinspo

[dollmillk]

back to say that i lost another 5 kg (13 1bs) in 2 weeks.

i’m hoping to lose another 13 kg by jan. 1

[dollmillk]

sorry for being inactive, thanksgiving was tough this year. been sleeping a lot to avoid eating left overs and i’ve cut down to strictly soda water with lemons in it. hopefully by valentine’s day i’ll be down to where i want to be

#anamia #ed journal #tw ed thoughts #tw ed account #ed goals #ed advice #tw ed related #ed #just ed shit #tw ana things #ana #thin inspo #thinspo #thinsinpiration

[dollmillk]

the fact that i can tuck my legs up when i sit in a chair now !! or crawl between seats in a car without running out of breath or not being able to squeeze through !! i can cross my legs for the first time in years !!

there’s no better motivation than seeing my progress some days. i’m accomplishing something i never thought i’d be able to. my gw seems tangible now and i can’t wait.

#anamia #ed journal #tw ed thoughts #tw ed account #ed goals #ed advice #ed #just ed shit #tw ana things #thinspo #thinsinpiration #aesthetic thinspo #sweetspo

[dollmillk]

“Henry, I wish you’d put me down. I’m too heavy for you.”

He smiled at her… “You’re as light as a feather” he said.

- donna tartt

#thinspo #aesthetic thinspo

[dollmillk]

good morning !!

it’s another water fast day. my grandmothers funeral was yesterday and i had to eat food because my mother was making making me feel guilty.

i should be able to burn it off quickly..i hope so…if i gain after all this progress i’ll die

maybe leave some meanspo or sweetspo..or advice…i’d love some advice actually. i’m so close to my gw

#anamia #ed journal #tw ed thoughts #tw ed account #ed goals #ed advice #ed #tw ed related #ana #sweetspo #meanspo

[dollmillk]

working as a server with an ed is hard. this food is so tempting hnnng

[dollmillk]

hearing people say,

“but you’re not gonna look right at that weight.”

“you’ll loose all your ass and boobs.”

“you’re fine the way you are.”

all i hear is motivation to show them what their missing, it just fuels me to loose more. skinny skinny skinny

#anamia #ed journal #tw ed thoughts #tw ed account #ed goals #ed advice #tw ana things #tw ed related #just ed shit #ed #ana #thinspo

[dollmillk]

my ex who was with me through my biggest commented on how much weight i had lost.

told him the fat would never take me alive again and he laughed.

i mean it though. if i start gaining weight again after being overweight since i was 13, i don’t think i could handle that.

i’m so tired of being the fat, large, beastly tomboy of the group. i wanna keep being be the pretty one for once…i’m determined to stay this way.

#anamia #ed journal #tw ed thoughts #tw ed account #ed goals #ed advice #ed #tw ed related #just ed shit #ana #tw ana things #thinspo #thinsinpiration #aesthetic thinspo

[dollmillk]

for those asking it took me a little less than 6 months to loose 45 kg (100 1bs).

the biggest reason i think i lost weight is because i smoke a lot of weed for my depression and anxiety. whenever i feel hungry and the such, i smoke or drink carbonated water. i cut down to eating one small meal or snack a day and a lot of days i wouldn’t eat at all.

pot helps boost your metabolism and such so i believe that combined with not eating and water fasting, i starting shedding weight with the work i do.

#anamia #ed journal #tw ed thoughts #tw ed account #ed goals #ed advice #ed #ana #sweetspo #thinspo #thinsinpiration #thin inspo