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herotheshiro · 7 months

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Spoilers for weak hero webtoon ch 267 but...

SHOOK that the author actually had stephen wake up AND have stephen and gray reunite. I mean i suspected stephen would wake up at one point bc why put him in a coma instead of killing him off then, and i also suspected he would wake up/they would reunite at the very end bc it makes sense narratively for gray to "finish" all his eunjang shit before meeting stephen again... but still. Having all that actually happen fr still surprised me.

I wonder how much the drama adaption influenced the webtoon or vice versa bc they had stephen working at a cafe (food place) where gray meets him again... either the author liked suho working his odd jobs or it was in the author's plan all along and the drama writer just low key "spoiled" it when adapting.

Anyway, i did go and read that last ch, and reading it made me kind of have a better idea of what the drama will look like... based on the fact they could p much summarize the main points of the entire story in 1/3 of that ch means they could reasonably adapt the entire webtoon in the 2nd season (w some story adjustments/cuts obvi) and end w suho and sieun's reunion in the very last scene. Yes it would be kind of rushed or they would have to remove a ton of stuff to have the pacing feel more natural but they could feasibly do it... otherwise if they follow the pacing of s1 then i can definitely see them adequately adapting in 2 more seasons (so a total of 3 seasons). Also the story summary had a shot of gray driving a motorcycle... i can totally see them bringing that to the drama since suho's key character trait was him biking around everywhere... drama!ben being like woah you know how to work a bike? And sieun being like yeah... i learned from my friend

Anyway while we're imagining drama scenes... i can totally see a way they could do the reunion scene in my head.

Sieun enters a korean grilling place similar to the place featured in s1 (i'm p sure there's a korean term for this kind of restaurant but i'm too lazy to look it up rn). Sieun looks out over the restaurant, a voice calls out "welcome!" camera pan or cut to suho's back (or a shot of sieun at the door w a blurred suho in the foreground), he's clearing a table and not looking at the entrance. He tells sieun over his shoulder to sit down and he'll get to him. Sieun stays rooted, silent and comprehending that suho is awake and moving around like he had never been in a coma. Suho finally turns around, wonders why the customer is just standing there, then has whiplash when he realizes who he's looking at. The scene could finish either 1 of 2 ways - 1. hyunwook and jihoon's comments abt their reunion could be used, w sieun hesitatingly (or sarcastically) asking "do you remember me?" and suho cheekily is like "ya i'm not stupid, weirdo. how have you been?" While sieun smiles at him and the scene cuts to an aerial view of the restaurant w the eunjang bros milling abt (similar to webtoon) OR my original thought of 2. suho looks at him in silent shock, sieun smiles at him as the camera zooms in closer to him and he says "hey, it's been a while" cooly and then hard cut to credits.

Anyway so if the author goes w realism, then that means stephen must have woken from his coma p soon afterwards? Bc technically the longer someone is in a coma, then the more messed up they are upon waking up... he's working fine (assumingly) and also seems to remember gray or at least the feeling of gray... technically we know it's likely been over a year since stephen went into the coma since i think gray transferred to eunjang abt the same timeline sieun did and the ending ep had someone talk abt how the school yr had finished... the webtoon has the benefit of stephen getting transferred away so gray couldn't keep up w him, but as i said in my prev post, the drama will likely also similarly transfer him away in s2 to get him out of the picture for sieun's further development... or maybe not? There's a couple ways they could go about it i guess. But anyway yeah this confirms choi hyunwook will be coming back at one point lol. Idk i convinced myself they wouldn't bring him back, that they would effectively write suho off but i mean as i said. He's in a coma, not dead so.

Also that webtoon ending scene is gonna adapt so well in the drama if they choose to use it as the ending... it will truly be a full circle w the drama starting w suho and sieun's story and then ending w suho and sieun's reunion. However it does kind of make the vibe different bw the drama and webtoon... w the webtoon focusing more on gray's character and his impact on a larger social network while the drama focuses on that first friendship sieun has and how it shapes him to face his later struggles (and then he is able to return to that friendship in the end, changed for the better (?)). Maybe i'm talking out of my ass since i've barely read the webtoon but again it's interesting to see the changes bw source and the adaption.

#reading #technically bc this stemmed from me learning abt the webtoon update and i went and read it too #watching #Also technically bc i'm commenting on where they could take the drama in light of this ending #weak hero class 1 #Yeah i'll tag this time despite my great hesitation to #I only have 1 other wh post on my blog and it's hella long so don't check me out

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herotheshiro · 7 months

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alrighty it's been a few days since i finished weak hero class 1, i wanted to write down my thoughts about it asap before my perception gets molded even more by time, online posts, and fancontent.

for anyone interested in reading this HELLA long post, just note that i'm p much a drama-only person. i did read up to ch 39 of the webtoon though, and i still plan to make comments about the adapation aspect & where s2 can take the story from here based on the drama/webtoon but just note that's where all my base knowledge is coming from. this post will have spoilers about the full drama

the show & story as a whole

i feel like i generally share the same opinions as mainstream about the drama... it was a good story - the pacing was excellent imo, i don't feel like anything lingered too long or was waaay too underdeveloped. i was honestly shocked when i saw we were at like ep 5-6 when bumseok finally turned, i thought he would've turned at the halfway point (ep 4) but again based on all the developments and what was to come, it was a good time when he did.

i went in p much having some idea of future scenes, and then later knowing roughly the plot of the season. i had no knowledge of the webtoon, like i think i learned it was based off of a webtoon when i 1st looked it up to watch but i had never heard of it before despite it being popular (?). i watched 2 eps, learned that the entirety of s1 covered the backstory of sieun that was simply just 1 part of the webtoon, read the webtoon to read the original writing of the backstory up to ch 39, and then finished the rest of the drama. did not continue past ch 39 bc tbh the webtoon does not interest me, the plot of HS boys warring really does not intrigue me lol.

(also... when stories that are not romance-based have female characters/representation i'm not happy with... that also turns me off to the story. i can make excuses for romance-based stories having weak characterization for the losers lol but to my knowledge weak hero is not a romance story - even if i am really suspecting the author low-key wanted to write BL but didn't go through w it. some of the stuff i'm seeing from later ch of the webtoon... why was gray lightly blushing when he was like i could have been friends w donald? sure technically there's nothing inherently romantic but that but also...)

i kind of wish i had gone w a completely or almost completely clean slate, i think there were a couple scenes where i didn't get the full emotional hit of bc i had seen gifs of it before (like the scene where sieun smiles for the 1st time when suho is poking at him in the hospital). i started knowing bumseok was gonna pull some shit, but i didn't know the full aspect until i read the webtoon. so i think if i had a do-over, i wish i could have looked at less stuff before finishing the full series... but i think knowing the webtoon story definitely made me like less sad about & better understand the developments overall.

honing in on some aspects

i feel like this hinges on a hot take but perhaps not surprising given my comments just now, but i honestly think the drama's writing is much better than the webtoon's - and this may be bc the drama had the benefit of retrospect, of having a solidified trajectory of sieun's story after this. (note: from now on, korean names refer to the drama character, anglicized names refer to the webtoon version) i was really surprised to see how different suho and stephen are as characters, but i do prefer suho over stephen... like the character morals are still present in the drama, and both characters are ppl who you really feel for when they're suffering through the injustice, but honestly... stephen is kind of not as likeable.

like his shtick of donating all his awards and stuff to the class & being like "oh i really enjoy helping others :)" just feels kind of fictional (derogatory) to me... while suho is more relatable with his initial resistance to help someone he barely knows, and his morals of doing the right thing shown through smaller actions (stopping his hit when he realizes someone is down fr - also his fight w the baseball team is so good bc it is a really good intro to suho's character without words; demanding the bullies get back in line when they cut) rather than a grandiose kind of thing. maybe it's bc i'm cynical and irl low-key suspicious of ppl who are extremely altruistic, and stephen being the way he is makes what happens to him in the end even more unfair which is the point - but yeah. also i prefer suho in the drama over stephen's "i would wipe the floor w all of your asses academically if i applied myself but i just won't ;)" even if technically the sentiment is still there w suho's ability to beatdown. but yeah, the rewrite of suho was really good (perhaps even needed) imo.

also them rewriting suho as someone who knows how to fight while stephen just got his ass beat... again, makes his fate more excruciating w how he let himself get whaled on & bullied to protect gray, and makes the bullies even more cruel but... i'm sorry i prefer suho fighting back. tbh i wonder why they didn't keep the story aspect of being put into a coma via falling from the roof but i guess it gives bumseok/bryce more direct involvement and reason for sieun to go off like he does (he's let this slide for the entire time but this time he can't given the direct action against his best friend)

i've seen posts being like suho seems to have aspects of sieun's future eunjung friends (me when i saw gerard sleeping on the desks: is this an ahn suho reference???), which i think will actually make s2 better bc it gives more incentive as to why sieun will even consider befriending the boys - rather than in the webtoon, which iirc/imo feels more like the boys just hang around sieun enough times for him to be like "fine, i guess we can be friends". bc remember, he has just lost his 2 only friends in extremely painful ways... he will need to be drawn to positive aspects (e.g., things he liked or remembers distinctly about suho) in order to open his heart again.

also... i have to bring this up bc i distinctly had thoughts about this when i saw it but them having a shower scene to match the same scene in the webtoon... literally groaned bc enough sexualization of younger characters but also of all the things to be faithful on... i get why they included it to show how suho is p much living at school and doesn't live the same life as his classmates but why... i saw an interview (supposedly, it was someone writing it up on twt) where choi hyunwook was like "it's hard to watch that shower scene bc it was my 1st ever exposure scene but i tried my best" and i'm like dude... i feel you as a viewer

other than suho/stephen, bumseok is the biggest and most obvious example of adaption change - like sure, characters should be allowed to just be assholes with no sob story to "explain" their actions, but i enjoyed them expanding bryce's character to be a bigger part of the friendship trio and give more reason as to why suho and sieun let his assholery slide until it's too late. bumseok's inferiority complex is honestly pretty relatable, and the scene where they reveal for the first time how badly his dad abuses him made me cover my mouth, but obviously it doesn't excuse the shit he ends up doing... but all together, it's understandable why he breaks down the way he does.

also, i really enjoyed how the violence at the end of the season took on more of a tone of "you can beat up whoever you want but it won't necessarily satisfy you how you like or bring back what's lost". bumseok had multiple times of beating ppl up and when he finally got his kicks in on the guy who really set off his inferiority complex, he realizes this wasn't what he wanted. in the webtoon, gray's beatdown of suho's bullies was presented kind of triumphantly, and there was definitely a sense of "hell yea" when sieun was going apeshit on them - but by the time we get to the last guys, that scene w bumseok where he can't bring himself to hit his ex-friend despite literally watching bumseok kick the shit out of suho... not only does it show sieun's warm-heartedness, but it adds to sense of defeat he has at the end with his outburst in the hallway and visiting suho after the adrenaline of fighting wears off. i think part of it was the show not wanting to support senseless violence in schools, but i think it was a nice change from the webtoon. also matched the story better since bumseok had more of a sympathetic backstory, had regret over what he did to suho, and also already got his ass beat physically & emotionally by his dad over suho anyway. no need for him to keep getting whaled on for the point to sink in

i'm also pleased they didn't super push a romance with youngyi, the initial interactions bw her and sieun were refreshing but i was still scared and thankfully p much the rest of their interactions in the season can easily be interpreted platonically. i still wonder a little if her character was really necessary given bumseok was already a 3rd wheel (like it was pretty obvious he wasn't exactly on the same standing like sieun and suho are to each other, mostly bc they didn't know much abt him really), but it is bc her headstrong nature kind of forces bumseok into the 4th wheel category and worsens everything since we all know bumseok embraced his inferiority complex rather than the discomfort of putting himself out there for his burgeoning friends.

i kind of wish though she didn't have so much dialogue of her being like "do you have a crush on me? ;P", like the times it happened were p much in a row repeatedly within 2 eps and i was like ok let's chill we know she's mainly here as a love interest but... i would've preferred less focus on her relation to male units and more about her as a character. on the other hand, her constantly checking her romantic value could kind of imply she has issues with self-confidence and is just putting up a front (also noting that she loves to post to social media of her having friends p much)... to her, it's like her involvement w ppl she considers her friends ends up hurting them in the end (seokdae getting beat up and arrested, sieun losing suho). which would add to why she was so affected by bumseok's accusation at the end, that maybe she wasn't that confident in them liking her as a person and that sieun, p much her only friend at the end of all this, may actually hate her bc she inadvertently contributed to suho's coma.

i personally think it's pretty likely youngyi will return in s2, i was surprised when they kinda wrote her off real quick at the end but no way she (and seokdae) are gonna be 1 season characters... i'm really betting she will return in s2 and (cringe) become sieun's love interest fr. i'm not necessarily against them being a thing, but i don't think there's enough development bw them yet at this point to be for it / not a huge fan of their dynamic in a romantic sense... honestly if anything, i would be for suho/youngyi, but sieun has the main character rizz i guess lol. anyway that one scene in the hospital where they handwave a love "triangle" bw sieun, suho, and youngyi... ngl the 1st time i watched it i really felt like it was less suho & sieun -> youngyi and more suho & youngyi -> sieun (and i'm not even talking about the scene afterwards where suho calls sieun warm-hearted which i think a lot of ppl tend to interpret romantically. also i feel like the term "warm-hearted" is such a good, succinct descriptor of sieun's character - to me, it doesn't necessarily mean kind per se but that he cares).

the gilsoo story (hopefully i'm spelling that right, i feel like i saw su before but idk the hangeul being used. but apparently u and oo are both used?? all my korean lang knowledge is from duolingo so forgive me)... i was wondering how relevant this addition is to the overall story (idr it being in the webtoon, i know gilsoo as a character wasn't in the stephen story for sure but idr if there was a gambling thing going on), but i was thinking on it while writing this and i realize it could actually be a good lead-in to s2 developments... it could be that gilsoo was part of donald na's network of dealings and sieun taking him down is partially why donald goes after sieun... and then seokdae could come back and help sieun take down donald based on his knowledge of how gilsu worked and who he worked with... i am aware that eugene supposedly plays a role in taking down donald by impacting his networks (this was based on a reddit post i read, i literally don't know) so if you remove that (sorry man, but for the record i also don't enjoy eugene as a character based on what i've read so far so. not sorry) this could be a good way to have a continuity bw the 2 seasons. if they don't do something like this, then that's unfortunately mediocre writing, or i'm missing info of what exactly gilsoo is adapting from the webtoon.

where do we go from here

and now another extremely hot take... i actually think the ending of s1 is a satisfying conclusion to suho's story. this is mainly due to that last scene bw suho and sieun in the hospital (which is also actually my favorite scene out of the entire show, with the surrounding context. i had actually seen gifs of that scene beforehand, but i was so happy afterwards that i never got spoiled to the surrounding context bc i was able to get at least a good chunk of the emotional effect... genuinely felt that crushing feeling in my chest every time i thought of that scene the day after finishing the show. i'm really affected by ppl mourning/yearning for things they no longer can have) - their soft apologies to each other for hurting the other, albeit if it's technically one-sided, i think is a good wrap-up of sorts since suho will be in the coma indefinitely (webtoon knowledge lol). it does provide a sense of finality of their friendship to sieun, not only the imagined apologies but the realization that they both made their choices and sieun (and tech suho) is left to deal with the aftermath.

but also narrative-wise it makes sense for sieun and suho to never interact again - it's what drives sieun's protectiveness of his friends, the fact that his 1st/recent close friendships were shattered and are no longer accessible to him. him regaining suho's friendship via suho waking up in s2 (if it's not at the very end after everything w the association) just weakens that point imo, he needs to develop his relationships w the eunjang bros separately. i've heard stephen does get mentioned/"show up" via memories but i'm under the impression he p much disappears after his flashback arc (outside of the impact on gray's character) - honestly i wonder why the author left him in a coma instead of straight up killing him since that "good bye stephen" seemed to have a lot of finality to it... but i mean the emotional hit to gray would've def been way worse if he had died straight up. anyway low-key suspect the author might have him wake up in a post-story side story but that's just wishful thinking. i personally suspect suho will get "written off" p early in s2 since they didn't already in s1 - like sieun will go back to seoul to visit suho and the hospital will be like "oh sorry he got transferred and we can't tell you where due to confidentiality" and i guess the grandma died or got put in a nursing home to remove that possibility bc no way the grandma wouldn't tell suho's friend about where he went. and sieun will be in despair for a few moments until his eunjung friends are like "hey you good?" (via text message or maybe they came w him) and he decides to move on idk lol. all in all, i don't think suho is gonna feature a ton in s2 and i think that's for the better.

tbh, given the ending of s1/sieun's backstory with suho, i think people should actually go into the drama either having read the backstory itself via webtoon, or have the knowledge that suho's story is literally only 10-15 ch out of a 200+ ongoing webtoon. i think that's definitely what made me accept suho's coma more easily - i've read a few fix-the-ending fics where suho wakes up and while those are sweet & i get why they're wanted, i think it is unrealistic given the knowledge of where the webtoon goes from here. but tbh, i'm really surprised they chose to focus the ENTIRE s1 on the stephen backstory... like how tf are you gonna adequately cover the rest of the gd story in the next season? i'm saying that bc i heard the original plan for the weak hero drama was to have 2 seasons, but bro you need 3 seasons even if you remove a bunch of the fights and reduce the length of time spent on flashbacks... again, i have very little knowledge of the rest of the webtoon after ch 39 (arguably nonexistent) but idk. also the reference to donald na and the association at the very end... it is really super random given the story of s1 and how they did not mention ANYTHING about HS gangs/wars until now. again, given that the webtoon's literal MAIN STORY is about this gang wars stuff, i'm surprised they spent so much time on sieun's backstory nor did they have ANY mention of HS wars (btw was none of that happening in seoul? or is everything happening in the neighborhood that eunjang is in)... like tbh i feel like they could have provided enough meaning if they had just dedicated 3 eps to suho. to my knowledge, there's not TOO many events they pulled from the main story to write the s1 story, so there's a ton left to get into. plus there's like maybe at least 10 significant relevant characters to introduce in s2... how are they gonna develop all of those units well? s1 did p good w its current number, but idk how good self-contained stories can be when there's like billions of units involved. i personally think they'll remove a good number of units to the chagrin of webtoon fans, but man it is necessary fr.

anyway all that p much implies i am interested in watching s2 when it releases (i'm saying it will but i guess it's not really set in stone yet?). i actually wasn't really planning on it when i was in the middle of s1, given that i'm not interested in weak hero's webtoon & therefore its actual story, but man park jihoon. he really drew me in and i want to see where his character goes in s2. honestly still can't get over the fact that he used to be a relatively well-known kpop idol with a cute image and all his prev acting roles are cutesy characters... really explained why he seemed super comfortable in interviews & variety show esque stuff. as everyone else has been saying, the acting was good in this drama - i feel like i really realized what subtle acting was from this, but also for the record weak hero class 1 is the 1st tv series i have finished in maybe years, i don't watch much stuff out of depressive laziness lol. park jihoon's expressions were subtle but definitely enough to key you in on sieun's various emotions despite being relatively emotion-less - i read he purposely spent a lot of time developing that, and his hard work obviously paid off. his "crazy eyes" at the very end when he's in eunjung... ugh so good to show how much sieun has changed from that 1st instance he was bullied by youngbin.

hold on! what do i hear...

one last thing before i finish up - the soundtrack. omg. i was listening to hero and homesick on repeat for like 2 days... the music & lyrics match the show really well. homesick and again's lyrics... genuinely was struck by them when i read them for the 1st time. homesick is also very nostalgic-sounding to me bc it reminds me of music i listened to during a recent period in my life, so there's that too. hero is really good as well, and also them playing that acoustic version during the ep 7 credits... ough...

personally, i associate the songs this way, maybe this is common thought but i was like eureka when i came to these realizations:

hero - general

brass knuckle - general

homesick - sieun's pov

self - suho's pov

again - honestly... bumseok's pov. originally i thought of it as sieun, and it does match sieun imo, but i read the lyrics again thinking about how this plays when bumseok realizes what he's done to suho and i was like wait...

in summary

weak hero class 1 was a good drama/season. the writing of the season's story was solid, and the actors do a good job of showing not telling through their expressions/body language. the cinematography/editing is pretty, really liked the constant use of blue. the choreography/editing of the fights is also good (again, suho's fight w the baseball team... chef's KISS), even if there are definitely shots where you can pretty clearly see the gap of space bw the hit and the person being hit (complete tangent, but i always think of this video essay every time i think about fighting choreography so i kind of judge all fighting choreo off of that lol. yes i know it's just 1 person's opinion but whatever they're right). my very 1st opinion upon finishing it was "this was an interesting adaption of the webtoon (positive)" and that p much summarizes it. i don't know if i'd ever rewatch it (kind of the case w p much everything for me though, i'm p lazy and don't enjoy re-doing things), but i'm glad i watched it in the 1st place. also i definitely do not have a network of ppl who consume korean media bc i had never heard of this show before i saw it in passing on IG but it came out literally a year ago lol... based on that, i wouldn't even be surprised if i ended up missing s2 when it 1st comes out

also real quick now that i mentioned it... the IG vid i saw was an edit/cut of sieun and suho's 1st meeting with the music "sweet little bumblebee". cannot get over how much that song does not fit them yet that was my 1st experience w this show/series

an aside

alright i waited until the very end to bring this up bc i know this is not everyone's cup of tea but. i have to mention it given the nature of my other posts on this blog. i did touch on this kind of topic earlier though so y'all should see this coming

the ship of suho and sieun :) y'all know me, i think it's cute bc i love genki-adjacent units x reserved units. but overall i think what is most engaging about this drama is the complicated relationships bw sieun, suho, and bumseok (not shipping) and how other folks play into that storm. also i have read fics and seen fanart and honestly i'm not a huge fan of the popular depiction of the ship... like babygirl sieun, suave or super excited suho... no offense, but that's not how i would characterize them... idk how to really explain bc i don't have much plans on producing a significant number of fancontent (if any), but i feel like they would be a very reserved kind of couple. like suho would barely change how he treats sieun bw friends and dating, maybe just a bit more flirtatious language just to get a rise out of sieun. maybe sieun would warm up to suho but he would still be very reserved, half the time he would still push suho off if he tried to kiss him or get handsy but in an annoyed way rather than embarrassed (if you don't let me study by god i will not be responsible for what happens next). idk, this one is less clear in my mind bc i feel like i'm getting affected by the fan stuff i'm seeing and the amt of time since finishing the show is making me lose my memories lol. btw still on the fence about some of the suggestive dialogue in the drama, maybe it was meant to just show suho was a playful character but also stfu about being a married couple in a past life... (sarcasm. but also the "stop playing hard to get" line during the pool scene got to me more since i hadn't seen it online anywhere before, really wish i understood korean so i could tell if that was an accurate translation or not)

talking about suho/sieun... honestly i was surprised when the webtoon author explicitly covered ppl seeing gray and stephen as gay... pleased there was no homophobia bw the 2 which i was honestly expecting, just them brushing it off & being like "damn ppl just don't understand our bond". but also it isn't entirely out of left field to say gray may have had some romantic feelings toward stephen, w the way he reacted to the idea of them dating, which is apparently a reaction he has never had again in the webtoon... not looking that deep into it though, same-gender-friend-crushes happen. again, i don't read the webtoon so idk where they go from there. just adds more to gray's sadness when he reflects on the past if anything

#i don't want to tag the series but i think even just mentioning it in the post is enough for it to show up in the tags #watching #wow have never used that tag bc the last time i reviewed something i watched was literally years ago before i started specifically tagging #also idk how good this post is bc i wrote half of it 2 days after finishing and then wrote the rest like days later #might re-read later and add on. the point of this post is really just something for future me to remember the show #i've gone back on this post several times before posting so i should have gotten everything i wanted to #added subtitles for easier reading for future me lol. even i don't want to read all this

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herotheshiro · 11 months

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and i know the counterargument against getting a lot of engagement is that you get more unwanted attention - haters, art thieves, reposters, etc. But i just want some kind of confirmation that i'm not just fluffing myself up, that maybe my art is decent and liked by others.

I know there is no art style liked by everyone universally, and i do adhere to the belief that everyone can draw and every art style has its appeal... but still. I just want the rewards of being liked lol. Obviously i am not sharing my art with anyone irl, i do not feel comfortable being a weeb openly

Sorry to turn this blog into a general life rant blog, but it really is so demoralizing posting art while trying to get over your perfectionist tendencies only to get no engagement while another artist w a simple art style gets 100+ likes within 5 min of posting. I AM NOT SAYING THAT SIMPLE ARTSTYLES ARE LESSER - it really is the case that you need to put in a lot of work to get comfortable with any style regardless of whether it's "simple" or "complex" - but... it just sucks when artists who most likely spent ~1 hr get rewarded for their ordeal of being known while otber artists who spent the same amt of time or even more get nothing. Obviously there's the concept you should enjoy art for the practice and not for the social rewards, but as they also say, art is meant to be shared.

Then again there are a couple details -relevant or not - i'm omitting from the situation above... the piece i'm thinking abt is for a relatively-active eng fandom for a relatively popular character. My piece i'm thinking abt is a ship that's not a rarepair but is not popular in terms of active fans, and is also for a dying fandom compared to where it was a couple years ago. And my piece was a traditional pencil art while the other art is digitized color. Let's also mention the other artist has a following of thousands while i am nowhere near 100, plus my currwnt followers are not particularly active anymore. So sure it technically is not fair to compare the 2 pieces and the situation, but at the same time... i want engagement too...

#Also my belief that everyone is good doesn't apply to me lmaooooooo (sarcasm)#But also not sarcasm. My fellow low self esteem ppl rise up #rant #art

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herotheshiro · 11 months

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#Not even gonna get into the AI art discussion and how it really sucks to see ppl produce art liked by the general masses in less than half #Of the time a regular artist would have spent. What is the point of continuing to produce when someone else cheats the system like that #I don't have anyone to produce for other than myself p much. Being your own only fan only gets you so far imo #rant #art

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herotheshiro · 2 years

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HOLD UP !!! before i wrote up this rant, i reposted a piece WITHOUT the twitter link and it seems to have showed up in the tag(s) bc i got a note !! idt it’s a follower either so omg. was it really the external link doing me in

[another not-a-review-post, thanks for your patience. idk where else to complain tbh]

so my art blog’s posts have not been showing up in the tags since like early october 2021. on one hand, it’s not a big deal since i’m just drawing this fanart as a hobby and it’s not like i NEED exposure; but on the other hand, it’s so frustrating bc tumblr is where i get comments on my art and i like seeing those. i may get (some) engagement on twitter to offset the lack of notes here on tumblr for my confidence boost (lol), but it really sucks when a post flunks on twitter so then i get absolutely zero engagement overall.

as i said, numbers shouldn’t matter to me but come on if i’m sharing art online i at least want SOME eyes on it… some sense of approval esp since it’s not like i’m sharing my fanart w ppl i know irl. posting it online is the only way it ever gets shown to eyes past mine. but anyway it makes no sense bc some posts do show up in the tags, but most of my posts don’t and there’s no pattern i can discern for the ones that don’t.

it’s not the linking-to-external-source-issue bc i link to twitter for almost all my posts and some of those have shown up.

my blog isn’t super new: it’s a side blog of my main blog i’ve had for years, this side blog has existed for over a year now, i post at least every few months, i’ve set a profile picture. i don’t have any questionable content on it (like everybody is fully dressed and stuff lol) and i don’t think i’ve ever been flagged

my other blogs (main AND my multiple other side blogs) have never had issues w stuff showing up in tags either. or at least the posts i wanted to show up did show up

i make sure to put all of the relevant tags in the 1st five tags

i don’t really care enough (aka don’t feel like spending my precious time and mental energy) to wrangle the algorithm/tumblr’s system, but it’s genuinely frustrating to see my art get engagement on twitter (when we all know posting on twitter is the equivalent of chucking it blindly into the abyss) but nothing on tumblr due to my posts not showing up in tags. i have enough of an ego to know that my art doesn’t BLOW, it’s decent enough for ppl to like so i KNOW it would get some notes if tumblr decided to not block me from the tag(s). tbh the only reason i want my posts to get engagement on tumblr is for that chance of getting tag comments… i want to read what ppl think of my art…

i’m also assuming that i’m the only one this is happening to, or among the small number of ppl being affected. stuff does regularly show up in the tags i’ve posted in (tried to) so other ppl’s tagging does work. but if this is happening to a large chunk of ppl… yeesh. then that really stinks that there might be more art/content out there for things i like that i’m not able to see

#it shouldn't be bc as i said some of my external link posts have shown up #and i think i have tested before removing links and the posts still didn't show up in the tags #hmm #reblog

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herotheshiro · 2 years

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[another not-a-review-post, thanks for your patience. idk where else to complain tbh]

as i said, numbers shouldn’t matter to me but come on if i’m sharing art online i at least want SOME eyes on it... some sense of approval esp since it’s not like i’m sharing my fanart w ppl i know irl. posting it online is the only way it ever gets shown to eyes past mine. but anyway it makes no sense bc some posts do show up in the tags, but most of my posts don’t and there’s no pattern i can discern for the ones that don’t.

it’s not the linking-to-external-source-issue bc i link to twitter for almost all my posts and some of those have shown up.

my other blogs (main AND my multiple other side blogs) have never had issues w stuff showing up in tags either. or at least the posts i wanted to show up did show up

i make sure to put all of the relevant tags in the 1st five tags

i’m also assuming that i’m the only one this is happening to, or among the small number of ppl being affected. stuff does regularly show up in the tags i’ve posted in (tried to) so other ppl’s tagging does work. but if this is happening to a large chunk of ppl... yeesh. then that really stinks that there might be more art/content out there for things i like that i’m not able to see

#kind of censoring myself to try to get this into the tags #tumblr #tumblr tags #tags #rant

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herotheshiro · 2 years

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sigh... i’m sorry but another personal, not-a-review, not-about-any-specific-fandom-in-particular post. i have a couple other blogs but i feel like this blog is the one that would fit this rant/offload the best. topic: being an artist online

so actually what kicked off my thoughts today was remembering the drama w n/ozmo and reading up on it again... i mean it’s a shitty situation for everyone involved but this post isn’t abt that situation. what i’m thinking abt is that even though n/ozmo got all this dirt smeared on them, they’re still relatively thriving bc they have a p decent artstyle... i’m saying “decent” bc even though their style isn’t among my favorites, it’s not bad objectively. also bc i just saw some old t/apv panels and i was like wow. they have definitely improved a ton compared to their current work lol.

i’m not surprised they’re decently popular on the jpn side of the internet bc i think their style is really unique esp among jpn artists (i.e. i don’t really see much art like theirs when looking at jpn accounts/pixiv’s for fandom/original content) and n/ozmo is also decent at storytelling if my memories of how i felt abt t/apv are indeed correct (i stopped following it years ago and i think it’s basically discontinued rn) so combine that and ppl will like your work. and it made me think abt how much of a benefit having good art ability can have in online creative/fandom spaces. (note: i’m not including ppl who actually draw professionally/have actual art jobs and had fandom drama happen to them. i’m thinking more of hobbyists. although i guess technically n/ozmo falls within the 1st category, i think they’re a freelancer iirc?)

recently i’ve been thinking abt how my art isn’t really in a place i want it. i’ve gotten decent engagement on twitter -- by no means am i scoffing at 60-200+ likes which is PRETTY GOOD for a small potatoes account like me lol -- but i just can’t help but think if only my coloring was better, if my style was more unique/fleshed out, i could get even higher numbers. obviously that’s the trap of social media and i know that numbers shouldn’t mean anything in terms of how i view my own art but idk. i think recently i’ve gotten that engagement and am just thinking to myself “...so what’s the point? of doing this fandom stuff?”

tbh i’m at a point w fandom that i don’t really want to interact w anyone on headcanons or discussing story or whatever (v lucky to have a sibling who’s also a weeb bc i can just discuss w them instead) so it’s not really like i’m getting social cred out of it. i think it’s moreso bc i’m starting to really burn out on my current fandom that i’ve been in for almost 2 full years, when historically i tend to only stick around in fandoms for abt 1 year. i’m not in school anymore and applying to jobs is just solidifying that feeling of uselessness for me... just wondering what i want to do w my art, w fandom. my recent thought was that i just want to post ship content that i haven’t seen before, but also i’m still somewhat triggered by ship stuff for this specific fandom so that’s also why i’ve been pondering my future on it (for the sake of my mental health). my bandaid solution for now is to try to wean off of being on twitter so much but then i feel like i move to scrolling aimlessly on tumblr instead so like. technically it’s better since i see way less of that specific fandom on here unless i specifically search for it, but i mean. not really deriving any joy from being on here tbh

but anyway yeah reading the n/ozmo stuff made me feel a bit sad thinking abt how my style isn’t really good enough i feel. i mean obviously i’m still working it out, i just recently got back into digital art basically last year after literal years of not using my tablet so of course stuff is still gonna be a little wonky but. just makes me consider that maybe i’ll never be “good enough” in art or storytelling for it to make an impact on someone. like ppl just look at my art and is like “oh cute/[some other simple positive compliment]” and then forget abt it. i’ve also been comparing myself to other fanartists more recently and i can feel it taking a toll on how i draw/feel when i’m drawing. although tbh i really do need to try to practice coloring/shading more... most of my wips/unfinished works i just stop at the lineart stage so it’s no wonder my coloring has stayed mediocre all this time lmao.

but anyway yeah i want to just finish this one general, non-ship fanart and then take an indefinite break from twitter, try to finish some pieces on my own (i.e. w/o seeing other ppl’s work). i have some wip’s for this fandom i’d like to finish fr bc i like the concept/idea but yeah i think being online just de-motivates me sometimes/most of the time. the other thing is that i’ve also been working on improving my self-esteem in therapy so i’d also like to try to finish pieces and be satisfied w them on my own terms without comparison or continuous concern abt reception

#sigh #not gonna be sharing my art accounts bc i'm not trying to fish for comments or anything #you can just imagine that my art is either good or bad based on your own tastes #the likes statistic i gave literally means nothing if you know what i mean #i could either be doing shitposts or insanely rendered art w those numbers #personal

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herotheshiro · 2 years

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i know what i said last year but against my better judgement i have been looking at the s2 updates for even if you don’t love me... and man. i don’t think i’m strong enough to keep reading.

[cw for this post: s*xual ass*ult/r*pe. sorry i have to censor those words bc idk if writing out the full words will get this blog nerfed]

like i literally got nervous at just the simple intro of the new couple bc while thankfully i don’t think they’re gonna do an open relationship and have hyun and jiwook be an actual thing, i do basically guarantee some shit is gonna happen to them/their relationship bc of the fact that guy is a cop ... he’s prob gonna stick his nose into the idol manager’s murder case or get suspicious of something and then get into some shit or maybe even killed bc the author isn’t above killing off their characters. (no comment on the age gap/couple dynamic of assumingly a cop getting w a kid brought to his police station. that’s literally the least of my concerns rn, i honestly just want one couple that’s not entirely fucked up so if this is it...) anyway i think their white + black pairing motif is cute (white hair + white coat & black hair + black jacket during their alley meeting), idk if that was done on purpose or it’s just a coincidence. tbh even when hyun was 1st introduced, i was concerned if he was gonna be another freak after jiwook but thankfully it seems at most they’ll just be friends w benefits and he’s not interested in jiwook like that. which is good bc i want jiwook to have at least one semi-normal person on his side to some degree

talking abt friends w benefits... dude. can jiwook fucking catch a break for once. not only was he r*ped right before the timeskip but you’re telling me during the timeskip he ALSO gets gangr*ped to the point he doesn’t even get turned on/er*ctions anymore ??? and you know seungeon is gonna be a BASTARD when they reunite. the author seems to like writing fucked up stuff but man. please. don’t do this to me, to jiwook. literally when jiwook was recounting all that i was like bro... i can’t do this anymore... i need to stop reading these updates...

anyway yeah idk if i’m strong enough for this, and fr this time. i was already nervous reading the tags for s2 but w this... i can’t do this. shit’s too sad/dark for me rn. i’ll just keep this on the back burner indefinitely and not look at new ch until i see an update where jiwook seems to be happy (albeit most likely temporarily. god.... get these freaks away from him)

#reading

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herotheshiro · 2 years

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alright i am going to apologize in advance for this post. first off, i’m really only writing it up to get it off of my chest and not have it keep knocking around in my brain. second, it’s mostly going to be abt criticism of certain fandom spaces w no constructive aspects -- just me ranting about the state of things. i’m not trying to make any beef with this, it’s just my observations and how i think abt it. i considered that maybe i shouldn’t post this since it’s gonna be lowkey bashing on certain fandom behaviors/headcanons but i’ll try my best to censor everything so it doesn’t show up in tags. but in the off chance someone who knows the fandom/ships finds this and reads it ... just something fun to read i guess

anyway this post is going to be abt the a/3 ship ts/tm, particularly the eng fandom. which btw i DO ship and stan before you assume, it is actually my #1 a/3 ship, but i have some complaints abt the state of affairs

so for ppl who’ve read my prev a/3 posts on this blog, you know i dislike the pairing bn/tm. well today i found out abt a bn/tm fic where tm is a camboy. tm, who canonly (and also i accept as personal characterization/hc) is not sexy and does not know how to use technology (ok in the fic’s defense, i didn’t read it nor note the fic rating so maybe it wasn’t actually a sex camboy setup, but i’m running on assumption here and specifics don’t actually matter for this post tbh). i think the fic is relatively popular but let’s get to the things that frustrate me abt it. first thing to note abt me is that i don’t actually ship any other tm or ts ship other than ts/tm. so:

a successful fic for a ship i dislike being able to run w concept(s) that are kind of ooc for characters? technically there’s nothing wrong w fans doing ooc stuff but after seeing that i literally couldn’t believe i’ve been beating myself up for coming up w ts/tm concepts that are maybe “too ooc”... clearly nobody gives a fuck. anyway i’m not surprised a bn/tm fic was the one to feature the tm camboy concept but more importantly,

HELLO TS/TM FANDOM? WHY DO WE NOT HAVE THESE KIND OF CONCEPTS IN OUR FIC OR ART TAGS?

and that 2nd point brings up maybe my biggest issue w the ts/tm fandom: perceived lack of creativity.

alright, putting my bias aside and looking at things realistically: i’ll admit that ts/tm is not a very interesting ship. it falls under pretty standard and very very oversaturated tropes: childhood friends, friends to loves, muscle jock w traditionally masculine vibes x kind twink w some traditionally feminine vibes. i personally like these tropes tbh, and i don’t think there’s anything wrong w shipping “boring” ships if you enjoy them. bn/tm on the other hand does pull tropes i personally don’t enjoy: age gap, smug character x kind character, and other senior x junior dynamics that depend on how you ship bn/tm (or tm/bn). as i stated, i personally don’t like these tropes even before knowing abt the ship but obviously other ppl do and i have no beef w that. however, i think the differences in these ships impact the kind of fan content created, and wildly.

now bn is a very popular character, and therefore i personally feel the artists who gravitate towards him (and therefore his ships) are usually very good artists -- either technically or conceptually. i will admit the bn/tm art i’ve happened upon are usually very well drawn (or relatively well drawn if not conventionally good) or the artist has a style i like. i actually have the majority of bn/tm artists/accounts blocked, but i am under the impression that ppl tend to stick w this ship for a long time and/or produce interesting and a wide variety of ideas for them.

now... this next part is by no means meant to be hostile towards the current artists producing for ts/tm. i truly value the work you are doing and understand that it’s difficult to constantly churn out creative pieces esp for a fandom/as a hobbyist. this next section is partially why i am PRAYING nobody finds this post but i need to write it out due to my building frustration. but my beef w the ts/tm content i see is that it’s all... very much the same kind of content. i don’t know if this is bc i don’t really branch out too much as admittedly some of the ts/tm eng content i see is not to my quality tastes so i tend to stay away, but for instance: i generally feel i do not see many AUs for ts/tm or dynamics contrasting from their standard close childhood friends relationship. for example, ts/tm meeting and dating not as childhood friends, but as ppl who’ve met each other for the first time. i mean, i get it: the childhood friends thing is fun and feels good, but i personally would LOVE to see ppl push ts/tm as a ship, their relationship dynamic, more. if you believe ts/tm are destined as a pair, then why not have them find each other again without that history? on the other hand, i will admit a lot of the appeal of the ts/tm ship is BASED in that growing-up-together-history so i do understand, but surely there are ppl out there who are able to think abt them past that... as a no-frills active guy and a reserved guy who should prob work on his confidence... haven’t y’all read original BLs w that kind of ship (i’m saying this while weeping softly).........

ADDITIONALLY, although i by no means would ever call ts/tm a rarepair... i genuinely feel like there’s very little content for it. on one hand, yes, i think there’s a lot of content out there esp if you are just getting into the ship, but in terms of new content being continually added to what’s already out there? as someone who has thoroughly dug through both the pixiv and ao3 tags for ts/tm, and know basically all of the active ts/tm jpn accounts on twt... i genuinely feel like i have exhausted all of the ts/tm content avenues. i have only gotten into ts/tm in late 2019, but i feel like there used to be a lot of ts/tm artists back then (like actively producing back in like 2017-18) but the majority of them have moved on to other stuff (another point here is that twt is AWFUL as an archive so even if i find an account that used to draw ts/tm, it takes too long and too much effort to scroll down down down to their ts/tm stuff). and i personally believe the reason for that is bc the majority of the ts/tm content does not push the ship further than the standard depictions. if other tm ships are out there making tm a sexy and seductive guy... WHERE TF IS THAT FOR TS/TM? it is -- imo -- so easy to do that for ts/tm... like, imo, ts is essentially tm-sexual so all tm needs to do is flash his midriff and ts can prob get turned on just by that lmao. i mean yes you might ask “now herotheshiro, why don’t YOU produce that content then” and tbh i do, but i don’t post it online bc i don’t have much confidence in it. BUT i’m beginning to believe now that i need to ignore my personal qualms w it and just post it for posterity and for those other fans like me seeking out more unique ts/tm content. i’m going to be brutally honest here, i literally fucking LEARNED to draw r18/lewd content BECAUSE of ts/tm and me not wanting to just revisit the same old artists/pixiv sets when i’m looking for an r18 fix (lol). my wish for new content is also getting to the point that i am literally trying to apply ts/tm to any interesting original BL i read, even if the characters are not ts/tm at all in personality...

as someone who’s read a fuckton of BLs and has seen a lot of fandom ships, i can understand why ppl are more willing to push the envelope for bn/tm. i’m just frustrated and kind of sad that i can’t see those kinds of concepts for ts/tm too when i personally believe that ts/tm has the potential for them. i’m not saying to go and copy bn/tm or other ships’ fan stuff, i’m just hoping some ppl will sit down and try to think abt ts/tm from a different perspective. the reason i feel so strongly abt this is bc ts/tm is like the only ship i ship for both ts and tm as characters; multishippers might not care bc they can just go to other ships for specific content/dynamics, but by god for the single shippers like me... ts/tm deserves those too. and at the end of this long post, i’m starting to think maybe it’s me who has to produce and publish that content... even though i’ve seen it all before myself, but perhaps it’ll help spark something for someone else out there. and if not, well... at least the ts/tm space will have some new ideas.

#rant #fandom #tbh this actually felt p good to write up #yes it's kind of vague at times but the tl;dr is that i wish i saw a larger variety of concepts by fans for this ship #yes part of it is on me to produce the content i like or want to see but #we are all in the same boat. we all want others to create the content instead of us #anyway if any ts-tm fans are interested in chatting you can hmu #tbh i prob won't delete this. thankfully nobody follows this blog lol

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herotheshiro · 2 years

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ok i just caught up on the happenings of even if you don’t love me and hooooo-eee bc i am actually quite excited for the manhwa’s return in feb now. if you want to read my thoughts on the story prior to like ch 40ish on, it’s here ... i’m not reblogging it for my thoughts here today bc that post is so long even w a read more and i expect this post to be on the longer side

but ok, first off, i did NOT realize there was a fucking time skip... i knew jiwook left school and his apartment, but i thought their next meeting after that was them still the same age as before... i was looking at the korean version so that’s one reason but also usually stories do a visual version of “du-du-du-du-du, X years later” but the author didn’t here, instead they had the characters verbally be like ‘oh the last time we met was 4 years ago’... which i actually like bc it feels more realistic. also that pic of the white shiba makes more sense bc i suspected time had passed but literal years makes more sense than like the maybe weeks-months i thought before

but anyway i’m surprised i predicted the plot point abt seungeon agreeing to be part of his family’s company in exchange for the loan money but i mean if you looked back on the beginning of the story you’d know (bc the last time i wrote about this manhwa, the latest ch had just ended w seungeon barging in to his sister’s office so you knew shit was abt to go down bw them even if i didn’t know what abt exactly). obviously this doesn’t excuse seungeon’s later behavior, but i can understand why he’s so pissed at jiwook during their reunion bc he basically gave up his life for a family who doesn’t care for him FOR jiwook but then jiwook left so now he’s just doing this shit for nothing.

and man reading jiwook’s thoughts abt how he wants seungeon to hate him so they won’t meet again (also title reference/explanation... i’m emo) ... and then it’s implied that he prob still holds a flame for seungeon even 4 years later (when he hesitated to hit him even tho he had good reason to bc he knew seungeon doesn’t like it.... it’s sad bc you should really have stopped liking him esp after he raped you, but also bro.....)... EDIT: ok nm i went back and actually reread the time jiwook was thinking back on and i think he hesitated to hit him more so bc he was afraid of a potentially violent response. bc i forgot seungeon hit him back in that scene :/ but i mean i still get the vibe that jiwook hasn’t fully gotten over his feelings for him or it’s complicated rather than complete dislike/apathy

second, i went back and read through some old chapters again and i actually did not remember/read (lol? i’ve mostly “read” this manhwa in parts rather than like all at once bc some of the shit that happens is kinda fucked up so i don’t wanna read it lol) that seungeon actually doesn’t really have any part in the succession of the company he was born into which i thought he did before... which is important info and reasoning as to why he clings so hard to jiwook. obviously it was fucked up when he tried to use his sad backstory to get jiwook to stay w him out of pity but i was like damn he truly is so emotionally messed up that he’s like i NEED jiwook’s love..... i also re-read the aftermath of blondie (i still can’t remember his name lmao) killing the idol’s manager which 1. made me learn again the whole drama bw him and seungeon is mainly abt their statuses which i literally never commit to memory bc i don’t care abt blondie at all and 2. confirmed that he had jiwook’s dad killed. i mean even looking at the korean version the dad’s death felt suspicious PLUS jiwook’s accusation in the first few pages of ch 1 but then when blondie was like ‘lmao time to fuck up their relationship’ i was like damn... so he knew abt the dad’s debt and predicted how the need for a fuckton of money would mess up their relationship. idr what i thought before bc the ch 1 stuff makes it seem like seungeon was the one to kill jiwook’s dad and i don’t think i had reread the manager murder aftermath in my last post but looks like it’s just jiwook’s misunderstanding (maybe even blondie insinuating that lol)

anyway i’m excited for season 2 fr now after getting all this info. so w a timeskip of 4 years, that means that blondie will prob be returning to korea again soon, and just in time to keep throwing wrenches into the relationship bw seungeon and jiwook as i provided an example of above lol. and obviously the idol’s role in the story isn’t over, i’m fully expecting him to return and try to blackmail blondie for hurting him both physically and emotionally and i’m looking forward to it lol. i mean yes this manhwa is kinda stressful to read bc i’m like i know y’all are just fresh out of schooling at this point and have a lot of feelings abt your relationship(s) but can we please learn to be emotionally healthy and communicate for once BUT i am looking forward to the journey! slash looking forward to the next time we can have jiwook and seungeon smile at each other genuinely which i hope will actually happen in s2 bc idk if i can handle an entire season of them at each other’s throats the entire time on top of other forces putting pressure on them

#but yeah s2 won't be until a long while from now so #fully expect to forget everything again by the time i realize it's updating again #reading

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herotheshiro · 3 years

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ok slightly unhinged anxiety abt fandoms/being online below. “slightly unhinged” bc it’s irrational anxiety to have not like it’s anything batshit crazy fyi. i’m sorry i have nowhere else to post this bc i am not writing abt this on main, putting this on a twitter thread, nor speaking abt it to my therapist despite having a call in the next hour bc i’m still to embarrassed to talk abt weeb/online stuff w them rn

i’ve been kind of low mood since this morning. i first found out an a/3 translator i follow on twt is in contact with and/or friends with another translator who i know ships b/ntm, and i didn’t really consciously respond at the time other than w dull disappointment but then i felt uneasy being on twt after that and it’s prob bc i’m like eh abt the 1st translator bc of their connection w the b.ntm shipper and i’m still anxious enough abt that ship that i get in a bad mood whenever it comes up even in passing or literally barely indirectly like this. i mean it shouldn’t be a big deal, bc (1) the 1st translator has never listed what they ship in a/3 (if any) so they could very well have been shipping invalid ships this entire time and i just never knew, but also (2) just bc you ship a pairing doesn’t mean you necessarily discuss it w all the ppl you contact in a fandom. and they’re both (good imo) translators so good to have someone to compare notes to.

but it just makes me feel meh bc i’m already eh abt the other translator despite knowing their (understandable as a fan) sometimes ulterior motives for translating some content and now i’m like man. ANOTHER translator to be side eyes about ?? it’s not like they put their shipping googles on when they translate tho unlike another (a 3rd diff one in this post) translator i’ve seen. and even if both of these translators ship b/ntm they talk abt it on separate accounts (the confirmed b/ntm translator does. idk abt the 1st translator and i didn’t dig into their main twt) so technically they do keep it away from non-shippers. and there are worse things to not be friends w someone over slash these are not even ppl i know personally, but man. it still bothers me a little. i feel like i’m getting a little better in my gut response to the ship and i prob should talk abt it in therapy but man i don’t understand ppl who are comfortable discussing it bc i still have some embarrassment/shame associated w being a weeb “publicly” even though i’m not into shady shit like loli secretly or whatever. even just telling them i’m on tumblr was so cringe lmao... i’m p sure they know what fandoms are bc they also see young patients but man. i still find it embarrassing to say that i like or even partake in that kind of stuff (fandoms, tumblr) like drawing fanart. anyway that’s a whole other can of worms (?) but yeah back to twt.

so i was scrolling on twt to kind of like forget abt the whole translator social network debacle and i started reading up on the controversy/recent events w princess mako in japan and wow reading both sides’ takes on the issue is so tiring... like there’s ppl who completely romanticize it being like aw hehe she gave up her status for love but then there’s other side who’s like yeah we’ve been against the marriage bc the guy is kinda shady and she deserves better. i mean personally wouldn’t wholly romanticize it when i tbh don’t know the full story and literally just learned abt the relationship today but also i’m weak to romance so i would just like to believe they do genuinely love each other as individuals... and like good for her for getting out of what is prob a really stifling situation w all the public scrutiny and attention but also it’s fucked how only the royal women lose their status when marrying a non-royal... basically just a ton of mixed feelings. and that kind of news spiral is partially why i took like a 2-month break from twt bc seeing those news stories can be so depressing either bc of the news content itself or seeing ppl’s takes on it or both. so yeah i just feel bad now. btw don’t ask me abt the princess mako stuff or my opinion bc idk tbh, plus it also brings in opinions on how japan’s current political sys works and i know there are STRONG opinions on that online and this is a fucking manga/BL review blog not current events/political blog. i just hope that the relationship works out bc if it fails ... bruh she cannot return to japan. she would be a social pariah fr and that sucks so bad to think abt

#personal #rant #fandom #man i never remember what to tag these non-review posts as

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herotheshiro · 3 years

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learned abt the manhwa cosmic seven today and of course i went to read the raws. unfortunately i’m unable to look at (i’m not even gonna say “read”, i’m literally just looking at the art lmao) like the last 15+ chapters so lol looks like i’ll never see the ending of this story. [spoilers for story ahead] i suspect endgame will be w leo but i mean honestly it’s pretty up in the air for me. i looked at the preview images and in a ch i wasn’t able to read i see that minkyu gets it on w niger (i’m using the eng localization names btw. idk if it’s the same in korean) and i think it would be more revolutionary (for a BL) if they endgame w minkyu x niger. personally i like leo x minkyu more... i don’t have any beef w niger tbh but i’d like to see more of his character. also my god there is so much sexual assault/rape in this manhwa and i mean sure it’s a prison setting but WOW i don’t really like reading that stuff (literally skipped past that inital scene of dustin in the warden’s office. god). the later ch where minkyu seems to use his body to try to get info/connections (idk the story tbh so maybe this isn’t what’s happening) is kinda interesting for him as a character but ugh

also i was so surprised to learn that the author of cosmic 7 is the same author of trap trap... although in retrospect i can see the similarities (like uh the uke being like really into sex/getting it on after he establishes a relationship w the seme. lol)

the art is quite nice; i actually thought it might be a western comic bc how many asian comics do you see these days that actually have darker-skinned poc in them but nah it’s a korean comic so nice. i mean obviously use critical thinking tho... the darkest-skinned characters are still side-lined (i.e. not main characters or play super huge roles in the story) and the two main characters who are basically lusted after by multiple ppl are both light-skinned asians... not really judging or normalizing that but just a note to keep your standards/ideals high, folks.

#reading #hopefully i don't have to censor the titles #kind of in a rush rn so i can't write up much. i may add more later

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herotheshiro · 3 years

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ok apparently i have never written about the manhwa mania on this blog which has to be false bc i SWEAR i have but apparently not according to my tumblr blog search lol. anyway read the latest update today which is the aftermath of seonjin finding out his dad is hooking up with the guy he’s sponsoring (sorry i forgot their names rn) and i’m like HOO WHEE... i was actually surprised he brought it up immediately after, i thought the son was just gonna stew on it but i mean it’s a pretty traumatic thing to find out. the ending of the update tho... ngl i was like yeah... YEAH.... >:)

every time i read an update i’m always reminded that i really genuinely like this manhwa. the art and sex scenes are quite nice sure but i think i just really like this specific story’s couple dynamic. i’ve never really been interested in the author’s other manhwas which i feel tend to lean towards another dynamic... but this one though. YEAH! i think i can work with their possessiveness dialogue bc the power dynamic shifts bw them throughout the story and also in the end you know they do care abt each other’s wellbeing fr. btw i have not reread this entire manhwa so i don’t even know if that’s accurate but based on what i remember

anyway i always feel this manhwa’s story is convoluted so every time i read i literally have no idea what’s going on... but i think the reality is that i’ve never read this manhwa all in one go before nor do i reread it often so i always forget the story by the time the next update comes. like i went back a couple ch today and only remembered “oh right the dad wants to kill himself and has this whole plan on how to do so” and then reread that the wife told mun-hyeok (yeah just went and looked up his name lmao) abt the plan before which explains the recent updates better bc mun-hyeok knows what yeonjin is doing and will fuck w his plan no matter what bc he doesn’t want yeonjin to die. anyway i know this manhwa has ended already so i looked at the ch preview images and looks like they have a happy end together so NICE. maybe after the final ch gets uploaded i’ll read through the entire thing at once.

tl;dr i like the manhwa mania and am disappointed i never wrote a review on here apparently. i really like the main couple’s dynamic and also the sex scenes are real good ngl lmao. i feel like it’s usually a couple dynamic i’m usually meh about (master-”dog” relationship) but i like how it’s done here. prob bc there’s less like humiliation play which i’m usually not in the mood to read

#reading

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herotheshiro · 3 years

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so i reread all of behind the desks today lol bc i was thinking abt it last night as i was going to sleep, and also fully read through the epilogue chapters which i don’t think i had done before. which means i read through all of the plot points all at once this time around. i think my thoughts for this readthrough might end up being the length of a regular post so i’m just writing up a new post instead of reblogging my old review of this manhwa. obviously spoilers for the story below the cut

again i like this manhwa mainly bc of 2 things:

i like the juxtaposition of young’s obviously manipulative language with taesung’s innocent language that also sounds suspiciously the same. obviously you know taesung has positive intentions and isn’t a controlling freak like young but it’s such an interesting way to depict the aftermath of an abusive relationship and the difference in intentions despite the same words even though in retrospect that probably wasn’t what the author was trying to do. unless... ?

sunny seo as a character!! on the surface he definitely seems to fall under the standard BL uke tropes of being clumsy and looking pretty and stuck in a love triangle as the shared obj of affection but from the very beginning you already know he’s not a pushover but he just seems like that bc he doesn’t really have or express strong opinions. a lot of BLs tend to have the shared obj of affection be like oh nooo i can’t pick bw the 2 of them... but i mean from the start sunny doesn’t want to be w young and his fear of backlash and change is what motivates his secret-keeping from taesung... also throughout the story they imply that he’s a good match for taesung who canonly likes action stuff by being someone who actually likes high-energy activities/vibes. tl;dr sunny is generally a good character who also has a lot of foreshadowing done for him to reveal aspects of his personality that contribute to the story

anyway onto my thoughts that i had during this specific readthrough

jaeyoon. anyone who read my prev review for this manhwa knows that i had beef w how they used him during the conclusion to young and sunny’s relationship. i now realize that maybe they DID actually give him a face reveal during his wedding when young and sunny split off to chat with a friend each and the friend who spoke to sunny was actually jaeyoon himself... BUT YOU GOTTA FUCKING SAY THAT!! i suspected they were the same guy bc of the hair color and them always hiding jaeyoon’s face until that “random” moment where they give this character who looks like him a face but like i was never sure... no offense to the author or anything but i think you have to put in-text that it’s jaeyoon and not assume readers will know based on your art that it’s him... there are too many side characters who show up so it’s not like we’ve ONLY seen taesung/sunny/young so far so now this 4th person who shows up has to be jaeyoon... i mean maybe other readers ID-ed it as him w no issue esp since he shows up being like ‘dude...’ when that other friend is like ‘well jaeyoon was in rehab and stuff’ but i personally think it should’ve been mentioned in-text esp since that face reveal wasn’t nearly dramatic enough to 100% capture readers’ attentions.

otherwise i think the fact that jaeyoon and taesung are similar is a great plot point. jaeyoon was clearly the only friend in that group who saw young and sunny’s relationship accurately so i’m glad sunny had at least one GOOD friend then. jaeyoon is implied to be someone who takes care of others similar to taesung (even if it’s only sunny he dotes over the most) too. other than young’s general possessiveness of sunny, them being similar also explains why young saw jaeyoon as such a threat. but yeah unfortunately i still don’t think it was handled as well as it could have been.

young’s explanation for his behavior towards sunny... i hesitate to say it was the standard “villain redemption” but tbf i think it was a good explanation for his actions even if it felt a little too clean of a conclusion (young letting go of sunny so easily and also apparently realizing and accepting how damaging he was to him). i say it’s partially redeeming bc it shows that young was kind of trapped in such a specific and damaging way of thinking abt life that it affected how he treated sunny but it’s also not really redeeming him bc like. be normal man lol you don’t have to be like that to others.

separate but related note but young’s mindgaming of taesung... when he was like oh everything abt sunny seo you like is bc of me... like DAMN that’s evil and good (writing-wise). although the thing is that young and sunny also haven’t interacted apparently for 5 years so i mean you do have to realize that by the time taesung reunites w him, sunny has developed enough of an individual personality so it’s not ALL young’s shit.

in my last review i said i felt like i wanted more of young and sunny’s history... tbh i think they gave us enough actually. all we really need to know is that they’ve known each other for a very long time and that young manipulated sunny enough during an impressionable time (young age, college. ppl know how college can be lol) that sunny felt that young was the only one for him. i was actually surprised jaeyoon’s story/details came up so quick in the story (i think it showed up in the 1st half of the manhwa) but i think it was a good point bc the story had to move on to the middle/2nd half of sunny and taesung trying to get their relationship to work. past me was also apparently looking for this scene in the bar apparently where young explains his “reasons” to taesung lol

not really much to say this time abt the hosung x young endgame. still don’t think they should’ve done it or had hosung have unrequited feelings but whatever i guess. tbh i didn’t really realize/connect until this time around that hosung actually was in freelancing art/publishing which was why taesung had him look at sunny’s work lol... i think last time that part in the epilogue hadn’t been translated yet so i just didn’t have the room to make the connection maybs

the epilogue ending... so i actually never read the epilogue ending or at least its eng translation, and i was like hell yea at the full circle shit w sunny being like ‘oh the cherry blossom petals are falling just like when i first met taesung in the infirmary’ but then the ch kept going w taesung and sunny on the beach... idk i think ending it literally at sunny being like ‘w you i feel alive’ was such an abrupt ending... like maybe if they added another panel of them smiling at each other it could’ve been fine but if the author was running low on time i honestly think they could’ve ended it at the scene of sunny accepting his contest award

also when sunny was like ‘yeah lol all my classmates at the children’s book program also get sick all the time’.... i was like bruh this author is prob speaking from actual experience lmao

the other thing abt the ending that was a little random was the quick aside abt taesung’s mom being against their relationship... i mean it was a reference to the mom wanting taesung to get married in the main story but then they dropped it and then suddenly brought it back up again... randomly adding that taesung had a sister who was his contact w their mom... like i get it, it wraps up the loose end of his mom but wow i was uh ok random ch abt potential family conflicts. also where are sunny’s parents lol but that would’ve been too much to get into too regardless of homophobia or not lol

overall it’s still a pretty solid manhwa. stuff proceeds at a good pace and the conflicts/misunderstandings make sense. i said before it’s kinda like a love triangle but it’s really not which works w me bc i don’t like love triangles that much (they stress me out lol); it’s also good bc young is clearly toxic for sunny and it’s good that sunny knows that rather than sunny being like “oh i know he’s bad but also... hmm maybe i can overlook it”. the manhwa’s not perfect -- i still get the sense the writing could be better even if i can’t really enunciate why -- but enough details are tied together that there’s nothing major i have to extrapolate bw (like i can overlook the jooyeon mishap even though it legit threw me off the 1st time i read through). also yes i know the manhwa is based off of a game w characters essentially already established but my understanding is that the author/artist essentially had to write up a lot of the actual story themselves even if they had a general plotline provided to follow

also the final author’s note abt the author personally preferring fucked up stories... when i started rereading i was like wait isn’t this the same artist for that one manhwa where the characters look like the k!lling st@lking? mains and even if i didn’t remember i would’ve realized w that author’s note lol. i think fortunately for them that sunny isn’t an entirely “pure” character so they had enough room to make him a little more twisted.

#reading #reread

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herotheshiro · 3 years

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ok i didn’t do a review of the phoenix wright trilogy but i’ll do a mini-write-up on apollo justice which i just finished earlier. this is mainly due to me looking up apollo justice/ace attorney afterwards and seeing ppl talk vaguely abt how and where the series and characters go after this... i wanted to add my 2 cents to the void of the internet i guess lol

spoilers for aa4 below

i think as a story, apollo justice is quite good but definitely a bit lacking in writing compared to the 1st trilogy. i feel like this is pretty much the common fan opinion, esp since the 1st trilogy was written all together as a 3-game-set and apollo justice has to conclude everything within 1 game. i think this game did real good at revealing info over time... i remember when they revealed the troupe gramarye poster and i was like WAIT... THAT’S SHADI SMITH... HOLD UP... personally though, i think the ending was not very strong for me -- i feel like we nailed kristoph almost a bit too easily at the end without much i guess concrete evidence linking him to everything even if basically everything was really pointing to him. [EDIT: lol ok reading summaries on aa4 and yeah apparently this is the point and why it being a jurist sys trial was so important… and the realization that he really could get nailed for the crime that he’s been paranoid abt for years made him break down at the end. Ok that makes sense I guess, I was just used to things playing out like the 1st trilogy where you would last min get decisive evidence lol] other than that, there was quite a number of loose ends that didn’t get tied up

so what happened to valant? i think the implication was that he was gonna turn himself in out of guilt even if he didn’t actually kill magnifi (sp?). and also w trucy having the rights i guess it would be complicated for the 2 of them to work that out. that whole aftermath wasn’t entirely clear to me esp since they didn’t give him a post-credits scene

so we’re not gonna get an explanation for why thalassa left her not-even-1-yo son to fend for himself? that was like my no. 1 thing i would’ve liked to get a reason for but the ending is just her being like oh yeah i remember now he’s my son and that’s it. no explanation for why she left him behind and returned to troupe gramarye w/o him. like at least a “oh it would’ve been complicated to bring a literal baby to raise back into that traveling group” would’ve sufficed, esp since we’re supposed to get the impression that lamiror is a kind woman. yet she left her damn kid behind with only a bracelet. were we just supposed to assume the explanation i gave above? i mean yes i’ve looked it up vaguely and i think we get more info on apollo’s growing up in later games but i’ve heard w very little mention of thalassa. which i mean i get, thalassa left him when he was around 1yo so he prob wouldn’t remember shit but man we never gonna get that explanation huh. it’s kinda messed up to leave this baby behind who i assume you care about; it’s another story if she didn’t want the kid and therefore didn’t care what happened to him but she left a bracelet w him which implies she does care

also the loose end of them not telling apollo and trucy they’re siblings. i’ll save this for a later paragraph though

also side note but when i was finishing the game up and before i saw the ending, i literally had a passing, very brief thought like “oh what if lamiror was actually trucy and apollo’s mom lol. what a crack thought” but then it actually happened... i mean it’s good to wrap up that mystery of lamiror’s past, plus they were insinuating so hard that maybe thalassa wasn’t actually dead lol so yeah you knew the mom was gonna pop up fr by the end

apollo himself as a character. now i’m not gonna nit-pick as much here bc he does show up again in later games w more backstory and character development as i’ve heard, but yeah he is very much a mystery character in aa4 i feel. he has basically no given history throughout the game, and the lack of detail made sense at first when you slowly started connecting the dots that he and the gramarye power were related, but then they never really shed any more light on him at the end. they really only reveal he and trucy are related just to explain why and how he has the power to perceive, not even to really indicate anything abt them as characters. i kinda forgot about this as i played the game, but i read a write-up by someone else being like “oh yeah phoenix you know his motivations as a defense attorney but apollo has basically none” and i was like yeah that’s right huh. bc the 1st trilogy reveals p early on that phoenix had a certain motivation to be a defense attorney but apollo you don’t get that, he’s just an attorney just to be an attorney i guess. which i mean is fine, you don’t always need a reason to do stuff sometimes, but it does make him a weaker character. i think maybe in the beginning they were like oh apollo respects kristoph as a lawyer but then they don’t really develop mpre backstory there like how they met or why kristoph decided to take him on. i thought the latter was gonna be a point that was gonna come up, like maybe kristoph took apollo on as part of his large masterplan or something bc i think kristoph does mention being aware of apollo’s “power” but yeah they didn’t delve further into that. anyway i’ll go less on this bc i’ll just assume they had plans for him to show up in later games therefore they didn’t fully flesh him out here. otherwise that means they just didn’t bother on him other than him having the perceive power and having a personal relation to the whole gramarye case

how did drew misham or vera idk who painted it know abt all of apollo’s 3 cases? i thought it was gonna be like oh phoenix or kristoph saw all this coming and somehow told misham abt it who drew it but uh that didn’t happen. was that bc drew misham was following phoenix in the news and saw the stuff happening w apollo and was inspired to draw his cases? that was a dramatic reveal when apollo/trucy/ema found it out but i mean i guess it was just to show that misham was connected to them/the overall story more than just a simple jurist sys test case

the last writing thing i’ll mention is abt trucy and apollo being siblings. after the whole phoenix x maya crap in the 1st trilogy i suspected they were gonna do the same with apollo and trucy... thankfully they didn’t which was good bc i liked them a lot as a platonic duo, also since i actually thought apollo was 25yo for a while so that age gap is pretty weird too if you do it romantically. i suspected they were actually related p early on after discussing my playthrough w my sis who upon googling info said ‘lol i did say why not ship them but i will not say that anymore’ so i was like lol it’s prob bc she found out they were related or something. regardless i mean i would have suspected that anyway bc the game pushes the ‘oh this perceive power is really only seen in trucy’s family line’ so hard so it’s like not that hard to draw the line bw them, esp when they’re super vague abt apollo’s history and how he even got that bracelet in the 1st place. anyway i think it’s cute to imagine two siblings running all over town to solve shit. as expected tho, there are still ppl out there who ship them even after knowing the truth which is meh but i mean what do you expect of fandom/the internet.

although one of my biggest disappointments is the fact that apparently even in later games, the two never find out they’re siblings. i mean i guess it’s not a major plot point that NEEDS to be addressed as covered in point #3 above, but come on? their mom is literally still alive? a mom and her children reuniting and developing their family relationship again? i mean she’s been so distanced from them for so long that a family reunion would be awkward sure but zak literally made phoenix promise to tell trucy apollo was her bro so i’m surprised he never told her even before his conversation with thalassa at the end of the game. like i thought for sure they were gonna reveal their sibling relationship in aa4 but sadly my imagined revelation scene never happened

(i literally thought up a funny scene too... them seeing thalassa and both being like “MOM??” at the same time and then looking at each other in confusion before thalassa confirms that yes she is both of their moms. although this makes less sense on apollo’s part since he prob wouldn’t remember what she looks like but i mean same bracelets)

otherwise, gameplay was pretty interesting this time around. music was bopping tbh, i played aa4 right after finishing trials and tribulations and wow the music quality improvement was so obvious. the perceive thing was pretty cool and their tutorial on how to use it was super cute lol (apollo: that’s cool but i’m freaking out a little here // trucy: yeah your eyes are kinda bugging out); although absolutely hilarious on how apollo "explained” it in court... imagine a lawyer looking real hard at you and then being like ‘actually you swallowed weird when you said this therefore you’re lying’... i cannot even imagine how that sounded the 1st time to the judge and klavier... anyway i also thought the MASON technologies chapter was really interesting, w phoenix going back and forth through time and using evidence from the future for the past and vice versa. fun time traveling stuff!

ok and that’s kind of all i wanted to say i guess. i’m prob gonna try to stay in the dark on fan content stuff like i was purposely doing before playing aa... i was looking some stuff up and i was like ‘huh... i didn’t get this impression of apollo or the apollo/klavier ship when i was playing aa4...’ i don’t want to get my own opinion of these characters warped by fan content/others’ opinions so i might just take a bit of time to solidify how i feel about/characterize each of the characters before i trek out into fandom land. also it’s prob bc i haven’t played apollo’s later games since he supposedly gets more character dev later. tbh idk if i will bc to be frank i’ve been using emulators to play aa so far and i don’t think there’s a rom out for the later aa games on 3ds. i mean if there really isn’t, i’ll prob just watch a playthrough on YT so i can continue the aa story since i did like apollo as a character despite his lack of backstory.

i was considering skipping edgeworth’s games to go right to dual destinies and continue on apollo’s story/the aftermath of that game, but tbh i’m less incentivized to since i’ve heard that the story/character continuity aspect kind of goes out the window in later games (also the point abt apollo and trucy still being in the dark abt them being siblings. even though yes it wouldn’t change how they interact w each other, i would also prefer the fact to be known officially in-universe so characters don’t be freaks as apparently there are some lines in later games that are a little weird). i mean i could end up having a different opinion abt the continuity, but yeah seeing those comments did put a damper on me diving straight towards dual destinies. so i might just play edgeworth’s games first as i originally planned anyway since they were developed right after even if they take place before aa4

#hopefully i don't have to censor the series #i don't say anything controversial in this but idk. sometimes ppl just want to have beef #i'll just say i've only played aa1-4 so just keep that in mind if i say something that doesn't sound right abt apollo #gaming

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