ivnwrites

[ivnwrites]

“9/13 this year is the Chinese mid-autumn festival(a.k.a moon festival). Guess who are making mooncakes for us on the moon!” (x-post: /r/aww) https://ift.tt/31nZaBw

#saving this

[ivnwrites]

From Syfy’s “queerest moments of 2018″ (and can I just say how much I’ve come to despise the word queer, it just makes me flinch every time I read it).

Were we watching the same show, syfy?

Delle Seyah was kidnapped by Aneela’s followers, knocked out, and forcibly impregnated with Jaq. Then she decides to keep the baby, leading to a whole mystical pregnancy trope that lasted midway into season 4 (i’m aware the actress was pregnant, but ‘magical alien pregnancy’ is a cliche). Yes, she was still a badass during and after the pregnancy, but that still doesn’t excuse the use of a misogynist trope. Delle Seyah was completely unable to give consent, so her bodily autonomy was violated, and the narrative plays it off as a net positive.

Also, great job playing into the psycho predatory lesbian trope. There was no evidence that Aneela had any plans to forcibly impregnate Delle Seyah. She created a way to combine a female’s DNA with a male’s outside of the womb, aka basic in vitro fertilization. Yes, she convinces her to keep the baby, but I’m not excusing that either. There’s nothing progressive about making the lesbian characters a couple of raging psychopaths.

With the pregnancy, though the plot allows Delle Seyah to remain active in other story lines, in this one she is just a vessel without any say in what will happen to her body. It’s an example using of a woman’s loss of control over her own body to advance the plot with no real care given to the psychological and physical effect on the pregnancy will have on her. It’s misogynistic and exploitative, and shouldn’t be praised as any sort of positive portrayal.

If it was Delle Seyah’s choice and she agreed to the pregnancy, I would have less of a problem, it would still follow the mystical pregnancy trope, but at least it would be the woman’s choice. I enjoyed Killjoys a lot, but this plot line still angers me.

#killjoys #mystical pregnancy #tropes vs women #sci-fi commentary

[ivnwrites]

The balance, the artistry, the deliciousness.

I WANT IT

the longest day in chang an :: lantern festival banquet

#shut up ivn #food

[ivnwrites]

If i'm honest, with the new watchmen, I get that it's been over 30 years since the events in the comic book, and she’s had time to grow and change, but I'm bothered by Laurie using blake as a last name and just calling the comedian "my dad" She knows about everything, and so she also knows about how he tried to assault her mother. she even confronted him about it, and at the end of the book she acknowledged it but didn't seem to really be ok with it. She and Dan were both using Hollis as a fake last name, so why not just stick with that? It just bugs me.

But otherwise I’m enjoying it. I’m glad they didn’t try to make another straight adaptation, and i’m defiinitely going to keep watching.

#watchmen #laurie juspeczyk #hbo watchmen #still upset that dan isn't there though. they left out my precious bird boi! #shut up ivn

[ivnwrites]

For a long time I was wandering what is that headwear Qing's noble women wear? I always thought it is sort of hat/cap until I saw it close up and it seemed like it's wrapped in hair. Did they shape their hair or wrap it around something?

It’s always difficult to look at drama hairstyles and figureout the physics of Qing hairstyles, because it’s difficult to tell where realhair ends and extensions begin, both in and out of universe. But I have actually done too much “research” on Qing dynasty hairstyle for someone who actually can’t read Chinese. Here’s the takeaway:

Keep reading

#saving this #historical hairstyle

[ivnwrites]

also it’s just interesting to realize how my politics (more social politics) have changed since i started this blog

[ivnwrites]

“From the script’s first draft, Larson says she noted the significance of women being involved, in all stages of the film’s creative process.”

#it's the same reason why they call it 'girl power' and not woman power #captain marvel #brie larson

[ivnwrites]

ain’t that the truth

When you set a goal for your neural network, and it *technically* has the correct output.

#shut up ivn #computer science

[ivnwrites]

probably going to be an unpopular opinion, but i think i'm actually liking s2 of terror better than s1 they're falling into a bit more traditional horror story beats and pacing, but i'm more creeped out and curious about the storyline and invested in finding out what the fuck is going on

and i just realized why it's called infamy, because the episode ends on the night of december 7th 1941 "a date which will live in infamy" ... I’m dumb

#The Terror #the terror: infamy #horror #horror tv

[ivnwrites]

The Terror: Infamy gets you literally in the first couple of seconds with some of the most unsettling physical acting I’ve seen recently.

#The Terror #the terror: infamy #infamy #well done AMC

[ivnwrites]

The eyes are killing me with the way they look like they’re glowing.

Free theme Friday for sketchdaily yay

#art #neon genesis evangelion #rei ayanami

[ivnwrites]

I keep getting inspirations for fics from things people do, asking permission to write the fic, then never actually managing to write something, and for that I apologize.

#shut up ivn

[ivnwrites]

The fairies from the royal ballet’s sleeping beauty drawn with their element using deepart.io and some maipulation afterward.

#ballet #neural style transfer #ai #yuhui choe #claire calvert #hikaru kobayashi #digital art #deepart

[ivnwrites]

It isn't really passover unless you singe your sinuses a couple of times.

Me, dipping matzah in horseradish (you know it’s the good stuff when you get a bit too much and it feels like you’re about to start breathing fire out of your nose)

#passover #pesach #judaism #jewish holidays #jewish food #shut up ivn

[ivnwrites]

Someone who hasn’t seen Babylon 5, please tell me what’s happening in these out of context stills.

#babylon 5 #out of context #tell me what's happening #memes #shut up ivn #I love this series so much but some scenes look really weird without context

[ivnwrites]

How Asuka Langley Soryu is a realistic portrayal of teenage female sexuality

Neon Genesis Evangelion is a legendary science fiction and mecha anime created by Hideaki Anno in 1995 (though there's some heated debate over the second designation given the reality of the evangelions). It's noted for its psychological and theological discussions and its questions about humanity, loneliness, and what it means to live with other people. The main characters have also achieved this sort of legendary status, becoming easily recognizable, but they also are notable just for how well they're written.

Asuka Langley Soryu is one of the main eva pilots and, I am going to be talking about how she is depicted in terms of her developing romantic and sexual awareness in the series and how it's still one of the most accurate depictions of female adolescent sexuality in any media.(I am doing this as a currently 21 year old woman who went through being a 14 year old girl)

Asuka fits almost perfectly into the mold of a traditional mecha anime protagonist; we're told that she got her college degree at 13, she's an ace pilot, she's assertive and much more determined than the actual main character, and has a dead parent. But Evangelion isn't a traditional mecha anime so none of this happens without consequence. Asuka's accomplishments and her need to be the "best" are shown to be the result of her desperation not to be ignored. This in turn stems from her mother's insanity during which she thought a doll was Asuka and couldn't recognize her own daughter. Needing her mother to see her is so important and fundamental to her character that knowing her mother is still literally there 'watching over her' inside the eva is enough to pull her out of complete catatonia in the series ending. This background allows Asuka to have more depth than a traditional character who is simply portrayed as sexy with no knowledge of it or acknowledgement from other characters in the series, making her simply eye candy for the audience but has no ownership of her own body.

The most famous (infamous?) scene that needs to included in this discussion happens when she is attacked by Arael in episode 22 and has her mental breakdown, we see a snippet a the scene I'll talk about later with Kaji. It repeats over and over the last moment when she yanks open her shirt to expose her bra and the top of her breasts and screams "Look at me, dammit, look at me!" As a result of her mental state, we don't know if this is what actually happened, but that doesn't matter because the scene tells us that this is part of how Asuka thinks of her body in her own mind. One analysis I've read talked about this scene as Asuka's frustration that "her body isn't developed or adult in the way she wishes it was." I agree with this, and also read the scene as her sort of trying to physically reinforce her assertion that she's an adult, and her saying 'I have an adult body, why don't you want me?'

This frustration and anger stems from the conflicting messages that girls receive. They're told at various young ages that they're women just because of their bodies development. Growing breasts mean that they are "getting a woman's body," they "become women" when they start menstruating. However, these physical experiences are universal, and pay no heed to a girl's individual mental development. Physical changes can only exacerbate this, because girls see their bodies matching those of women, and so does society at large. Girls the world over start to be treated as adults the instant they start developing breasts when it comes to seeing them as sexual objects, but at the same time, they are still belittled and told that they aren't smart enough to know their own bodies. Girls are also told that they supposedly mature faster than boys, and all of this together creates a strange conflict where girls are at the same time told that they are supposed to be adults and yet only treated as adults when it is convenient for those around them, or when they do something wrong, otherwise they are seen as foolish children. "Save the world, but don't expect your emotional turmoil to be taken seriously."

This can be seen clearly in her relationship with Kaji. Throughout the series, Asuka is shown to be infatuated with him, even though he’s in his 30s and already in an on-again-off-again relationship with Misato. He's shown openly flirting with other adult characters in the series, and multiple characters even get in cracks about it, but from his first appearance onward, he brushes off every one of her advances. We see what is perhaps the most significant their interactions during the Arael scene. The audience is shown a flashback to the two of them having a nighttime conversation on the deck of a ship while they're traveling to Japan from Germany during which she tries somewhat clumsily to seduce(?) him and convince him that she's not interested in anyone else. His ultimate response is to tell her that she's still a child and doesn't have to rush into everything because she still has time.

In reality, it isn't rare for teenagers to develop crushes on adults in addition to their peers. In real girls, the same way as in the series, they can see it as a sign that they are more mature than their peers or even more ready for an 'adult' relationship than those around them. Asuka has what is probably the best outcome; the subject of her affection turns her down but is otherwise kind, as are the other adults around her. In the end it's her own deeper unacknowledged problems that cause the situation to spiral. The problem is that unlike in the series, there often seems to be no way for girls to win psychologically. In real life, if a girl's feelings are returned this leads to obvious problems, and public rejection can lead to ridicule. Girls are blamed for mistakes on the one hand, and belittled on the other. They aren't given the compassion and understanding that they need most at those times.

Through her interactions with Kaji, we can see the disconnect between Asuka's desire to be seen as an adult and her actual actions. She become hyper, somewhat aggressive, and slightly possessive when Kaji is around, becoming frustrated when the relationship between him and Misato rekindles. From Asuka's perspective, she can't see why she isn't the better choice. As discussed above, she sees her physical body as functionally the same as all the other women Kaji expresses even passing interest in, and psychologically she sees herself as more mature than Misato (and she is both right and wrong depending on which aspect of their personalities you examine, but that's a whole unrelated issue). The problem is that she has no idea what the adults around her are thinking; an adult man will not be attracted to an adolescent girl, and though all of the women around her can see that this is just a teenage crush, Asuka herself doesn't have the life experience to know this yet. This, combined with her fear of being ignored, means that what is actually a perfectly reasonable rejection registers to her as abandonment.

We can see this even more clearly if we look at her relationship with Shinji. The two of them are the same age, classmates, living together with Misato, both lost their mothers at a young age, both pilot the evangelions, and have grudging sexual tension that persists to the very end. Despite this, their personalities are pretty much incompatible. The line that is most iconic between them is Asuka's  "what are you, stupid?" (the english dub's version of her japanese line "Anta baka?" basically asking 'are you dumb?'). Shinji is a lot more timid and less self confident than Asuka, and she frequently is shown literally pushing him around. We see in other parts of the series that he is attracted to her but is too intimidated by her to really be able to do anything.

At one point when the two are alone at home, she kisses him, explicitly stating that it's because she's bored. It predictably doesn't go well, with Shinji just standing there frozen until Asuka backs away and then runs to the bathroom to dramatically rinse her mouth out, declaring that she should never kiss to kill time. It's played as a funny scene, but later we see that it actually had a deep effect on Asuka. It's implied that she did see Shinji as a potential romantic interest, but saw his silence and his lack of engagement with her as rejection, and this along with his improvement as a pilot over the series leads her to resent him more and more. During her mental breakdown, Asuka sees an image of his face and screams "You won't help me! You won't even hold me! You're no one! No one!"

In her mind, she has been rejected by all of the people sh's approached romantically. This leads her to feel unwanted and she starts to draw in on herself, and her feeling of animosity grow to encompass all of the characters in the series. In the same episode as her breakdown, she's shown standing naked in front of a bathtub (see note below) saying how much she hates having to be so close to Misato and Shinji. She become more and more worked up until she kicks something across the room yelling "I hate Misato, and I hate Shinji, and I hate that First Child bitch Rei! I hate my dad, I hate my mom! But mostly, most of all, I hate myself! I hate this! I can't stand it anymore! Why do I have to do this! Why me?!"

It is intriguing that Asuka, and the other female characters in Evangelion who show similar insight, came from the mind of an unmarried (at the time), childless man in his mid-30s. Anno himself says that "I like to read romance novels written by women. Since I'm a male, I don't really know the emotions of women. And because I want to understand their feelings, and create more realistic female characters, this is something I have to pursue." and there are plenty of accounts of him asking female animators and voice actresses for their input on characters to ensure that they were realistic. Because of this, Anno allows Asuka to express some of the frustration teenage girls feel with their bodies, and manages to walk the thin line of making Asuka real as a burgeoning sexual being without crossing into the sexualization of a minor.

Note: It is uncomfortably easy to find sexual art and dolls of the underage main female characters in the series but none of this comes from the series itself (there is one character who provides occasional 'fanservice', but she is an adult woman in her 30s). In the actual anime, nudity is not treated sexually, rather it is used to represent and heighten characters' feelings of vulnerability and isolation, reinforcing the idea that characters have been left completely alone with nothing except for their own skin, and at times not even that. Despite this, fans in Japan fixated on the character Rei Ayanami, which Anno attributed to the fact that "They can't handle strong women such as Misato and Asuka." This is even more unfortunate because it abandons the character's stoic loyalty and dive into self reflection midway through the series in favor of reducing Rei to an injured quivering victim using just the visuals of episode 1 (though once again, there's character traits there that are ignored as well). The most important part to say about this is also the fact that both Rei and Asuka are 14 YEARS OLD IN THE SERIES. For god's sake Japanese men, WHY!

Another Note: Actually I can explain why; the age of consent in Japan is 13 which has led to entire industries based on the exploitation of teenage girls, which means that child prostitution and pornography are rampant. Essentially, pedophilia is totally legal in Japan, in addition to child pornography as long as it isn't of real people, meaning that pedophilic anime and manga are totally legal, because easily available child pornography has 0 negative impacts, right? (WRONG). industries based on exploiting young girls: https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/asia_pacific/for-vulnerable-high-school-girls-in-japan-a-culture-of-dates-with-older-men/2017/05/15/974146c4-035d-11e7-9d14-9724d48f5666_story.html?noredirect=on&utm_term=.a58a262e1867 child pornography laws in Japan: http://time.com/2892728/japan-finally-bans-child-pornography/ https://www.bbc.co.uk/bbcthree/article/57eaaf23-0cef-48c8-961f-41f2563b38aa

#neon genesis evangelion #asuka langley soryou #analysis #character analysis #evangelion #this turned out longer than I expected

[ivnwrites]

“Bertie!”

The man in question nearly jumped out of his chair when the door slammed open. He’d retreated to his office to escape the commotion of the holiday party downstairs, but evidently wasn’t going to be completely spared. “Thack, sorry, do you need me for anything?” He’d begun to reach for his jacket where it was draped over the back of his chair, but stopped when his concern was waved off.

“No, not at all.” Thackery crossed the office in a few long strides, clearly drunk enough that it had started to affect his mobility. It wasn’t enough to be a real inconvenience, but his hip banged loudly against the desk as he perched on the corner to look at Bertie. “Mostly just wondering where you were.”

“I guess it was just too crowded for me down there.” Even on the second floor he could still faintly hear voices from the lobby now that the door had swung open. The surgical wing was all but empty of staff save Bertie and the night duty nurse, the other offices locked and bolted. It had been the respite he’d needed after spending the past hour glad handing with random donors and city officials whose names he wouldn’t be able to recall if his life depended on it.

“Fair enough. Would you like me to kiss you?”

Bertie blinked as the sudden change of topic almost gave him whiplash. “I’m sorry?”

“Bertie, since your first day here you’ve been staring at me like a puppy when you think I can’t see. It’s adorable, but I’ve been wondering if you’ll ever do anything about it.” Thackery tilted his head with a shrug when his remark was met with silence. “Edwards has gotten it a few times too recently, but never Gallinger.”

“I respect Gallinger as a surgeon, but he can be an ass sometimes.” The response was almost automatic as Bertie tried to latch on to an easier question.

Apparently that was the right answer, because Thackery threw his head back and laughed loud enough for it to echo down the empty hallway. “That’s a fine assessment of him.” The grin stayed on his face even after his laughter died down and he returned to gazing expectantly at Bertie. “You still haven’t answered my question, though.”

“You’re sure you won’t wake up and regret this tomorrow?”

Thackery chuckled. “Bertie, I’m drunk enough right now that I’ll probably regret ever having been born tomorrow. This won’t be anywhere near my mind.” He reached out and cupped a hand around Bertie’s jaw as the other came to rest on his shoulder. His voice had been low before, but now it dropped to just above a whisper. “You can say no. It won’t change anything between us, I promise.” 

“Then yes.”

Bertie gasped when lips covered his own without warning and he found himself being pressed back into his chair. To his credit, Bertie did try initially to give as good as he got, but the combination of surprise and height disadvantage meant that he soon gave up. He let his eyes fall closed and brought a hand up to wrap around Thackery’s wrist, more holding on for dear life than trying to take any sort of control.

They separated and Bertie blinked down at Thackery’s coat buttons for a few moments to get his bearings, drawing in large gulps of air one after the other. His entire body felt jittery and frozen at the same time, the same way it had when he’d shocked himself trying to repair a frayed wire. He wasn’t quite sure what he’d imagined kissing Thackery would be like, or if he had really tried to imagine it at all. A strange mixture of thrill and disbelief was circling through his brain in a dense fog that he couldn’t quite shake until a voice broke into his thoughts.

“Are you still with me?”

“Yes! Sorry.” His gaze snapped back up to see Thackery’s amused grin. 

“If I’d known you’d react like that, I would have done this sooner.”

Bertie’s expression darkened. “Please don’t make fun of me.” 

A half smile spread across Thackery’s face as he leant down again. “I’m not.”  He raised his eyebrows in the way that meant he was being earnest and pulled Bertie into another kiss. This one was gentler than the first, less desperate, and Bertie was actually able to reciprocate, placing a hand on Thackery’s waist to pull himself up straighter. Thackery tasted like whiskey and the omnipresent sting of disinfectant that seemed to permeate everything in the surgical wing. More than anything though, he felt solid, steady in contrast to Bertie’s still racing heartbeat.

This time Thackery only tilted his head rather than pulling away entirely, leaving their foreheads still pressed together. It left them still cocooned in the moment before, breaths ghosting over each other’s lips. At some point, Thackery had begun to run his thumb back and forth over Bertie’s cheekbone, and the younger man found himself leaning into the touch with a sigh, lulled by the steady rhythm.

“I can make some excuses if you want to go home, say there was some minor emergency that I sent you to deal with.” His eyes slid to the still open door and the light spilling down the hall from the stairway. From the sound of it, the party would last for at least a few more hours before the guests began to leave. “You can go through the basement and I doubt anyone will notice.” 

Thackery wasn’t wrong. No one had come looking for Bertie when he disappeared over half an hour ago, but he’d still been reluctant to leave entirely. Having someone to cover for him though, that was an entirely different matter. “I’d appreciate it.”

Even with their agreement, it took a few minutes for them to actually break apart, longer still for Bertie to rise from his chair. Thackery’s position on the desk meant that for once Bertie was looking down at him rather than the other way around. He couldn’t help but grin at the novelty as Thackery wrapped an arm around his waist. “You have to let me go if I’m going to leave.” In truth, he disliked the prospect of leaving now, not wanting to break the intimate contact for longer than needed for him to breathe.

“I don’t really want to.” The answer was given with a look of mock seriousness before Thackery slid off the desk and began to propell them both toward the door. “But tomorrow will inevitably be hell, so go home, get some sleep, and I’ll see you in the morning.”

#The Knick #thack/bertie #anther random obscure show #first kiss #fluff #My fic #this has been circling around my brain for a while #john thackery #getting back into the swing of writing