#🦒.anon

[adventuringblind]

Jos hate jos hate jos hate

He just gives me the creeps. Like Max’s tone when talking about him reminds me of myself talking about my parents.

Detached. Wanting to move on but still try to be open about it even though it’ll make ppl ask questions especially if you avoid and don’t answer the question. (Did that make sense?)

So yeah. I don’t know him, but from what I can observe through a screen I’m not a fan.

- 🦒

IT DOESSSSS

(Hello new anon! Thanks for joining me and starting a rant!)

Don't get me STARTED on the psychology that is Max Verstappen. His mind is my obsession and how anyone could ever paint him as a villain hasn't been through trauma with a parent (or hasn't realized that they have).

Like, joking about trauma is a very clear indicator?? "My dad did that once to a mechanic??" I'm sorry??? Max, baby, that's not something you're supposed to laugh about...

Key word here is supposed. I laugh about my trauma all the time and it concerns my therapist.

It sucks that Max's personal life is out there for the media to pick apart. I've seen debates about Jos' parenting style and how he has given Max everything. I don't see any ungrateful bone in Max's body. If he was, then Jos would've been out of Max's life the second he turned eighteen.

So then people ask: if Jos is a bad parent, why is he still around Max?

Answer: Traumaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

(Rant under the cut about abuse trauma... you've been warned)

Good god, are people so ignorant? It's hard to detach from a parent! Specially one who you spent all your time with! You get used to it eventually, you figure out how to cope and then you know nothing else aside from that.

All those times Max was driving recklessly when he was younger? I've listened back to his radio. He was in fight or flight because he had learned early on that it's better to risk crashing and injuring himself then placing lower.

I did the same thing! I was good at archery. Like, I was giving adults a run for their money at the age of thirteen. I switched from a recurve bow to a compound and about two weeks before a tournament. It was an absolute pain because it was an entirely different way of shooting.

I have this memory of my dad driving me to his friends house to sight in some longer distances the day before. As in, crunch time. We were out there in the cold and rain for hours. I was sore already because constantly pulling back sixty pounds of resistance with just your arms gets tiring. I broke so many fundamental rules; the ones my instructors were specific about. However, I knew it was break myself or my dad was going to lash out.

Anyway, I tore two muscles in my dominant arm by the end of the day. I got home and my dad went to shower so I hid with my mom in the kitchen icing it to hopefully lessen the pain.

I placed second in regionals. My dad lectured me in the car on the way home. He said the injury was my own fault. The doctor I saw said they didn't know how I managed and my instructors said I couldn't shoot at the range for over a month.

My dad hailed me a hero to everyone who asked about it.

Jos Verstappen is so outwardly aggressive that anyone who has been through something similar can see what's happening. Just because he's done a lot for Max doesn't negate the other behaviors. This isn't math, you can't cross cancel, two negatives don't make a positive.

Rant over! :)

#Ren's.inbox #Ren's.thoughts #maxverstappen.things #🦒.anon

[theemporium]

Hooooooly shit I just got off of work AND AHHH MORE PPL ARE FEEDING MY BRAINROT WITH ROYAL LESTAPPEN. HELL YEAH.

Also general question to you and the other anons: do we actually like queenie as a nickname? I just kinda went with it after the original confusion.

Ok ok ok so so so more brainrot time

This little SHIT of a head knight would be sooooo fucking smug (privately unless they’re in the bedroom) that he bagged not one but TWO royals (to the anon that brought this up; your so real for this). And they’re from THE two most powerful kingdoms in the realms…. Oh he is sooooo smug and is such a little shit about it if he gets a chance.

I’m adding to my personal head cannon from the powerful kingdoms here… let’s assume that Charles and queenies betrothal is an alliance thing, since the two kingdoms have been at war for GENERATIONS. One is successful because of their kindness and generosity, the other because they’re feared. Even better they’re neighboring kingdoms, and queenie is an only child (not, her dads a manwhore but she’s the only one with a claim to the throne). So with the betrothal, there is also an agreement that when queenies parents abdicate/die the kingdoms are gunna be merged… yeah max is SO FUCKING SMUG.

Which just makes the Jos is alive and trying to get max to fuck over the royal family even better bc he KNOWS that the kingdom is going to get more powerful at one point and he wants that power.

But also once max puts his foot down and says to hell with jos’s plan, his is trying to assassinate queenie. Charles is fine, he likes Charles, but let’s go with the theory that Sophie (maxs mom) was his second wife and an assassin or something of the sort from queenies home kingdom killed his first wife. Which is why queenie is his main target and not max

Ok I have more ideas but I’m stopping here I’m getting hangry

Also is the 🦒 emoji taken yet? I’m forgetting my (and yours IM SORRY BTW) indecisiveness for now and am going with the tallest animal I can find bc I’m also a “giant” (according to my friends)

I don’t know why the assassination plot gave me flashbacks to ella enchanted😭that scene where she fights back against the curse and doesn’t kill the prince like she was intended to. I don’t know why that came to mind but it did!!!

but the way that max originally trained/became a knight because his father wanted someone in the inner circle. the fact it started as a way to please his father but then he fell for the king. and then the queen. and for a few months, it’s so easy for max to feel like he’s living the perfect life until jos steps back into his life

and imagining max first pulling away from charles and the reader because he doesn’t want his father to know. but then he does it because he doesn’t want jos tainting this pure thing in his life, or hurting the people he loves

and maybe charles and reader knew his relationship with his father was rocky, but when they find out the truth??? when they find out how badly max was treated??? THEY ARE HAPPY TO SHOW JOS WHY THEY WEAR THE CROWNS AND NOT HIM AND MAX IS JUST SO OVERWHELMED BY THESE TWO PEOPLE WHO LOVE HIM ENDLESSLY

#cece answers #royal!lestappen #lestappen.thots #🦒.anon

[inkykeiji]

Those prompts are so cute. 28 with sd-natsuo!Touya -🦒

prompt: time for [blank] series: sugar daddy natsuo warnings: touya is his usual abhorrent, despicable self, toxic relationships, noncon touching, female reader, use of the pet name princess, daddy kink words: 1.1k

i know right!!! i really love them!! thank u so much for requesting sd!nat touya giraffe bb!! <3

Time for… has become one of your least favourite combinations of words. You’ve learned to fear what comes next, the beginning of that sentence always sending splinters of ice shooting through your veins, leaving behind an unsettling chill of dread.  

Because time for is one of Touya’s favourite phrases. 

And nothing good ever follows.

“Oi, wake up,” rough hands curl around your shoulders to shake you from your slumber, dirty fingernails digging into your bare skin. “It’s time for school.” 

“Leave me alone,” you grumble, attempting to wiggle out of his grasp, his grip only tightening in response, callouses decorating his palms sanding against your flesh. “I’m not going anywhere if it’s with you.” 

“Hey now,” he begins, and you can hear the shit-eating grin in his voice, the barely restrained amusement fizzing with anticipation in his tone. “Daddy’s rules, not mine.” 

“I don’t care.” 

This is the fourth morning in a row that you’ve been woken up by someone other than Natsuo, who has apparently been needed at the hospital all fucking week. For the first three days of Daddy’s on-call shifts, Shouto had been there to wake you, to dress you, to feed you and bring you to school and take you back home, with his gentle voice and tender hands and murmured out praises, floating on the tails soft laughs, sandwiched between private smiles and twinkling eyes. 

But it was only a matter of time until it wouldn’t be Shouto.

As it always is when it comes to Touya. 

He’s inescapable, looming in the background of your mind, the everlasting threat of him tinging every interaction, every experience, everything.

“I don’t care if you don’t care, you brat, Daddy says so. And what Daddy says goes, whether you like it or not, whether it’s from my lips or Shouto’s.”

Yeah, sure, except whenever the order is coming from Touya’s lips it is always, without a doubt, tainted—dipped in his own opinions, coated in his own special brand of venom and malice and deranged glee, and it always overrules whatever Daddy actually said. 

“Screw you,” you spit, trying to wrench yourself from his hands, to turn over and roll away from him, face scrunched with the force of your squeezed shut eyes.

But Touya is faster, Touya is smarter, Touya is larger. 

And that means Touya is better. 

He’s on you in a flash, nothing more than a blur of sapphire and ink, yanking you flat on your back, trapped between him and the mattress. Jagged hips squirm between your soft thighs, bones carving into flesh and pinioning your body to the bed, coarse palms collecting your wrists and cuffing them, pinned high above your head. 

“Screw you, huh?” his breath wafts across your face, spicy nicotine stinging your eyes. “That’s cute. Though I know you’d like to supplement that with a dirtier word,” he leans forward, presses his forehead to yours, noses brushing. “And I am just begging you to do it.” 

It bubbles up on your tongue, a caustic curse that erodes your teeth as it tries to escape.

Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you! 

Fury thrashes in your chest, and Touya raises an eyebrow, smirk stretching into a full grin. Your molars mash together, jaw flexing with the action, and you swallow thickly, a desperate attempt to keep those two little words from escaping, letters scraping the walls of your throat as you force them down, leaving a burning ache in their wake. 

You know what game he’s playing. You know how to play it, too.

And you refuse to give him the satisfaction of winning.

Fuck you, you fucker. 

“I’m not going to school with you,” you say instead, the words ground out through clenched teeth. “You’ll have to drag me by my hair.”

“That can be arranged,” Touya says simply, and he looks like he’s genuinely considering the prospect, weighing the pros and cons to determine if it’s truly worth it, when his phone begins to buzz.

He transfers your wrists to one hand, putting pressure on the joints as he leans to the side and fishes the device from his pocket, bones grating together between his palm. 

Your resounding yelp does nothing, doesn’t even seem to phase him at all as he answers the phone, wedged precariously between his shoulder and his ear. Sharp hipbones dig into the flesh of your inner thighs as Touya shoves his hips down harder, an attempt to garner more leverage and steady his arched upper body. 

“Hi, Natsu, what’s up?” 

“Daddy!” you gasp, the word rushing from your mouth in an involuntary gush, Touya throwing you a look of warning. 

“I wish I could say everything’s fine, but I’m having a bit of trouble with your princess.”

And, really, he does sound regretful; you’d mistake him to be genuine had you not been able to see the sharp glint in his eyes, the malicious smile slapped across his face. 

“No, unfortunately she’s being quite uncooperative this morning; no, I don’t think Shouto had any issues,” sapphire eyes glance toward your face, and he winks. 

You glare back at him, steadily holding his stare. Blue flames blaze, licking around his pinprick pupils, and your eyes water a little, beginning to burn. 

It hurts, like gazing directly into the roiling center of a bright inferno, but you will not look away, proud and stubborn as your glassy eyes, now shielded with a thin film of reflexive tears, bore into his. 

Squirming beneath him, you shove your hips into his, a feeble attempt to throw him off your body, and he grunts a little, gruff sound bleeding into a vicious chuckle. 

“No, I’m fine,” he says to Natsuo on the other line, voice just a hint huskier than normal. “Of course,” he becomes a little more serious, features flattening out a bit, eyes glazing over as they focus past your face, suddenly concentrated. “Hey, listen, don’t even worry about it, alright? Nii-san will handle it...Promise. Love you, too.”

And then he’s hanging up, tossing his phone on the mattress beside you, device bouncing a little upon impact. Touya’s eyes refocus, knocked back into kilter as his attention hones in on you again, gaze sharp, crisp, distinct. 

“Daddy isn’t very pleased with your behaviour,” he tells you, mocking pet name dripping off his tongue. “You’re such a stupid little thing, y’know that?” 

His laugh vibrates against your chest, his free hand beginning to creep up your bare thigh, fingers sinking into tissue and dimpling skin as they knead higher and higher and higher, slipping beneath the lace-trimmed silk of your skimpy nightgown. 

“You think you can just act like a disrespectful little bitch with me and get away with it?” his tongue licks at your parted lips, tip tracing the bottom one before dipping inside your mouth to lick at your teeth and gums and you recoil, face screwing up in a soured wince. “It’s time for retribution, baby.”  

#dabi x reader #todoroki touya x reader #EEEE THANK U SO MUCH GIRAFFE BB #I LOVE WRITING HIM HE'S SO FUNNNN #had an absolute blast with this one hehe i hope u enjoy!! #have a fantastic weekend and pls stay safe n hydrated as always! #sd!nat universe #🦒.anon #clari gets mail

[gabessquishytum]

Thinking about warprize cat!dream having king cow!Hob's bigheaded baby.

Cats do tend to hide when it's their time is it not? So I imagined Dream slinking (waddling) through the corridors when he feels the first twinge, and suddenly he feels like he has to press close to the wall. Everything is just so vast and open, TOO vast and open, and it makes him extremely uncomfortable. Cow architecture is made to fit many people at once because they're extremely sociable, high ceilings, big rooms, big windows, big everything. Dream feels slightly nauseous, even if it didn't bother him before.

So he hurries through the castle, searching for something, not quite knowing himself for what exactly, when he gets closer to the servants areas and happens upon the first (huge, built-in) linen closet.

In the blink of an eye, Dream is inside and curled up. It's narrow, dark, soft, and smells good, and the best thing is that nobody's around.

This changes of course when, a few hours later, the contractions get worse and he can't keep quiet anymore. Also the whole castle is searching for him because he just kinda vanished.

The first poor servant who tries to open the closet gets their face full of claws. The light hurts Dream's eyes (and he's hurting enough already, thank you) and also he needs to be safe.

Through the haze and his own pained sounds Dream can hear more people arrive and then leave again, and then there's a soft, soothing voice, reassuring him that nobody's gonna disturb him, that that is gonna be okay.

It's Hob. Hob sits himself in front of the closet and keeps watch, and talks the whole time to keep Dream grounded (and has a hard time not opening the doors himself with all the sounds coming out).

He's rewarded when, after a particularly nasty hour of screaming, he's tugged into the closet by a weak paw, the doors shutting behind him.

His eyes have a hard time adjusting to the dark and the air is thick with the smell of amniotic fluid and sweat and blood, and then something squirming and slimy and warm is pressed into his arms. Hob's entire existence screeches to a halt the first time their child drinks from him.

He's kinda lost to the world, cradling them in one arm, Dream in the other, half asleep and drinking from his other teat.

That's probably why, when someone tentatively tries to open the closet again, he decidedly shoves it closed again with his foot.

(The linens are kinda ruined, tho. But that's a price Hob is absolutely willing to pay.)

(🦒 anon was kind enough to let me know that this one came from them!)

I absolutely adore this idea. And God do I feel bad for Dream. However many months of carrying Hob’s huge baby have truly done a number on him already, and he's so ready to not be pregnant!!!! He'd dearly love to be back in the cat kingdom now. They tend to set up special nooks and crannies like catperson sized cardboard boxes for their pregnant individuals to retreat to when the time comes. Cat midwifes are also very "hands off" - nobody interferes unless there's a serious problem. To be honest, Dream wouldn't mind a helping hand just to haul the baby out by it's adorable little horns. But he knows that it's best to let nature take its course.

The labour is worth it in the end, because the baby is perfect. Dream even finds himself thinking that another one wouldn't be so bad. The sight of their little one suckling enthusiastically from Hob is truly one that Dream will never forget (and he is very grateful that his husband is a portable source of milk, because he really needs it right now).

Hob finally emerges from the closet hours later with the baby latched on firmly to his teat, and a very exhausted Dream wrapped around him like a deflated serpent. At this point he's thinking that they'll just remodel the closet into a birthing suite... because the way Dream keeps looking at their newborn so adoringly, he gets the feeling that it won't be the last time it's needed!

#🦒 anon #the sandman #dreamling #nsft #cw pregnancy #cw mpreg #cw hybrids #cw birth #catboys #cow hob

[lpsotd]

May i request Giraffe #526? i belive it has already been LPSOTD in the past but I still wanted to suggest it.

Sincerely, giraffe anon. 🦒

todays littlest pet shop of the day is ... giraffe #526 !! for you, giraffe anon !!

#🩷.requested #giraffe anon 🦒 #giraffes 🦒 #lps #littlest pet shop #kidcore #toycore #y2k #2000s #toys #early 2000s #2000s toys

[ian-galagher]

Not really an ask - just wanted to let you know I miss Africa like crazy!!!

Hope you are well and happy - you are amazingly talented and I love your writing 🥰

ehm THANK YOU THATS SO SWEET 😭😭😭

I miss Africa too 🥺 I weirdly got it in my head that no one wanted any more after that last chapter and went on break for a little bit 😅 but I've recently started up again and did finish the first draft of the next chapter, I'm currently working on getting it finished 🤗

thanks for your message, that was really sweet! 🤗🧡

#🦁🪶🦒 #more is coming! im determined to get this thing finished #now if this cold could just leave me alone that would be great #africa #ask #anon

[writers-ex]

Okay but I have this fantasy of riding g!p Yeji in the cinema but then you cum in one part of the movie that its quiet so you have to be silence

-🦒

:} i knew i liked you 🦒 anon <3

bc yeji would be so bad convincing you to sit on her lap during the movie a quiet place bc can you imagine with every jump scare you jump and sink yeji's cock deeper inside you to the point that you can feel her in your stomach but you're so turned on and scared by this whole experience that you orgasm rather quickly making yeji quickly turn your head to muffle your moans as you cum all over her lap while the movie is silently playing in the background, the movie staff isn't too happy about her soaked seat but yeji is thrilled that you managed to cum two more times before the end credits roll and that you're still hungry for more that you decide to ride her some more in the parking lot

#gp!yeji #g!p yeji #gp!itzy #g!p itzy #yeji hard thoughts #yeji hard hours #hannie.txt #itzy hard thoughts #itzy hard hours #🦒 anon

[arkhammaid]

Ok but continuing my little stark x mick agenda

Tony and Michael definitely have met at some point. And if we wanna pull from MCU cannon stark industries probably was a sponsor (let’s face it it was probably Ferrari) . So yes they’ve met

And while mick and little stark didn’t meet in that way, they’ve def met at FIA events (if that’s a thing) or sponsor events because again they’re parents are champions. And to clarify, they’ve met as kids.

So REALLY if we wanted to…. Childhood friends/acquaintances to lovers who have always been able to be BRUTALLY honest with each other about their feelings about their parents because the other just GETS IT.

-🦒

tony and michael definitely have. tony knows so many people, OF COURSE he knows the schumacher family. and especially as tifoso.... he also knows kimi and fernando, all the big ferrari drivers and champions!! and yeah definitely, during tony's play boy days (up until iron man happened) he sponsored ferrari. then he slowly started to pull back, especially after the fiasco after monaco in 2011

so... the thing is, tony didn't know little stark was his kid until her late teens. BUT mick and little stark defo met during FIA events because of her mother. so yes, they're kinda childhood friends

which means... they qualify for the childhood friends to lovers trope!!! and you're so right, brutally honest to a point where they can't even hide their growing feelings for each other. one day little stark just asked mick "do you like me?" and mick just wants to panic but he says yes because why would he lie?? only for him to have a bigger shock when she says "cool, i have feelings for you too." and that's it. then they came together and happily lived after...

#anne talks: with anons #anne talks: with 🦒 anon #— ˚₊‧⁺˖ lightning on track #mick x little stark

[ewanmitchellcrumbs]

a lot of yall stuff are being translated and reposted on wattpad - 🦒

Please send us links to it whenever you see it! Wattpad is fucking useless at taking down plagiarised work, but it at least gives us the opportunity to reach out to the users and request that they remove it.

#🦒 anon #asked and answered

[sluttywonwoo]

B-but did you see dk's most recent photoshoot (typing from the grave) -🦒anon

the w stands for Whore

#answered #anon #🦒 anon #dk

[adventuringblind]

Dear gods you and 🏍️ are braver than I am with the energy drinks… I even refuse to try more than the original flavor of redbull because I’m that fucking scared… also redbull scares me the least ingredients wise

It’s not that I hate monster, I’m just scared to add more variety to the energy drinks in case i end up addicted more. The possibilities scare me.

And no, I haven’t tried other flavors yet because I’m indecisive af and probs wouldn’t like them anyway… I’m extremely flavor picky (I drink like a sum total of 5 things in life: COLD(!!!!!!!!) water, apple juice, FLORIDIAN(!!!!(don’t ask me why specifically Florida I don’t like anything else)) orange juice, yellow gatorade (don’t come at me plz I’m sorry) and now Red Bull).

And now for a small confession: I’m really bad at thinking about dynamics between people. Which means the times you hear thoughts about pairings for fics from me is little…. I would love to write but as soon as I start thinking about stuff like this (especially as an ace/aro spec individual) I struggle big time. So sadly I’m struggling to provide Max/Osc/Lando thoughts. Sorry :(

Anyways I’m going to bed now and sorry about the constant yapping and long asks from me.

- 🦒

Yeahhhhh the ingredients are kinda trash garbage. But like... they are in a lot of things, so I've based it on a pick your poison kind of thing.

To each their own for drinks of choice! Not judgment here! ... except for the cold water because HOW?! Ice hurts my teeth. They are sensitive okay T_T

Also, apple juice for me. But specifically the kind from Washington because the local stuff is really good, and I get it from farmers markets and the stall is a cute little decorated thing and the people who sell it are so nice.

Anyway...

I, myself, am not on the aro/ace spectrum. But! Understandable. I think I'm more demi leaning? It's like if I had to describe it. Like me and my fiance have known each other for so long, it's kinda like kissing your best friend? But I'm also too logical for most relationships, which is why Para social and imagination all me a little wiggle room.

My partner isn't polyam, but I have been for a long time. But just in the way that I like having other people close in the 'we're more then friends' way but not in the 'we have sex way'. Idk, am weird like that.

THE POINT IS! I see you and empathize. Specifically in the amut department because AHHHHHHHHHHHHH??? How do people write smut with no plot? How do they write these words? Because I can't figure it out T_T

It's so much easier to allude to it and just do the build-up and emotions and whatnot. Sometimes, I can make it work, but those fics take me months to write, and I refuse to go back and read them.

Tis why I usually end up writing angst.... and ya know, gore. But that's fine because to each their own!

ALSO DON'T APOLOGIZE FOR TALKING TO ME!! litterally say whatever in my inbox because FRIEND! INTERACTION!

Weird to think people actually wanna talk to me even if it's like this 🥺

#🦒.anon #Ren's.inbox #Ren's.thoughts

[theemporium]

just got back from work!

This morning I was still convinced this was all speculation

My coworker who knows I follow f1 (doesn't himself. Only knows stuff from my rants) came in at 13:00 (1:00 pm) yelling at me if I heard about Lewis to Ferrari 2025.

1 was STILL DEFENDING THIS AS

SPECTUALYION

I CONFIDENTLY told him it's bullshit

I GOT HOME TO THIS.

AAAAAAAAAA

l've now spent the last two hours looking at f1blr collectively loose their minds.

I've joined them

Wtf.

And I'm a closeted f1 fan at home cause it's

"not a sport for girls*

AAAAAAAAA

- 🦒

it’s truly been a mind fuck since this morning😭😭😭😭like I genuinely can’t believe this is the timeline we are currently in like HOW????

I’m sorry you can’t talk about f1 at home tho :(

#cece answers #🦒.anon

[inkykeiji]

By now I have a stepfather part 2. As you know I have weak spot for Jouno, but little guy hates him immensely. His reaction was there's hilarious. He said would live with his father if he became his stepfather (he's really a momma's boy). He even rather had PM!Dazai or corrupted form Chuuya as a stepfather. That shows how much he dislikes Jouno.

I'm not that surprised little guy choose Dazai as his first choice. What little guy finds important is that someone is there for him. Who is puts him in his place when he needs it or advise him when needed. -🦒

omggg this is so CUTE HAHAHA the hate for jouno is strong (i can’t necessarily blame him tho; jouno is extremely scary and i wouldn’t want him as my father either,,, my Daddy on the other hand,,,, EHEHE)

i see!!! that makes sense!! dazai would definitely be good at that! i think he’d try his best to be a good father to your lil guy irregardless, and he would be sooo flattered when ur lil guy looks up at him with stars in his eyes and just pure wonder in his voice while he fires off a million questions at dazai that dazai smoothly and effortlessly answers one by one <3

#ur son would soooooo melt dazai's heart HAHAHA #i can just hear him chuckling at him and staring down at him with a soft smile and melty eyes <33 so cute!!!! #i hope ur having a fab day giraffe <333 #pls stay safe n don't for get to drink water!! #have a wonderful week ahead!! #🦒.anon #clari gets mail

[gabessquishytum]

Feel free to delete if too weird (cw childbirth). But someone mentioned cow!Hob having cat!Dream's kit and it wouldn't let me go.

I hope you're well. Take care

— — —

Hob kneels in front of the bed, his pained lowing muffled by the sheets, his strong thighs trembling. It is no wonder, Dream thinks, that the body that nourished his child so well for nine long months would have trouble letting it go. They have been here for almost a day.

Hob is tired but determined, strong, driven. As he should be. As Dream has grown to know him. Dream plasters himself to Hob’s back once more, purring, massaging his hips, squeezing them during contractions.

“My king,” Hob breathes weakly after a particularly nasty one, “I don’t think I can do this.”

Then he shouts, straining again, and as Dream reaches down between Hob's thighs he can feel the tiny sliver of a wet head under his paw. Would their child be more like himself? Or more like Hob?

“Do not despair, my pet, you are almost there,” Dream whispers into his ear, the rumble in his chest trying to soothe Hob’s pain. “Push for me.”

And Hob does, crying and shaking and shouting, but he pushes, and when he has almost run out of air to scream, the small head comes out. “Good,” Dream purrs. “So good. Wait for the next one.”

The next one makes Dream’s ears ring and their child slip into his waiting paws. He holds it for a moment, letting Hob catch his breath, before placing it in his arms after Hob has turned and slumped down. It is a brown-furred kitten, its eyes closed, tiny, stubby horns just about peeking out next to its ears.

Dream’s purring intensifies, and when Hob huffs and tenses again, no doubt to pass the afterbirth, Dream severs the cord with a sharp claw and takes the babe from Hob, starting to lick it clean.

He only looks up again when Hob’s groans get louder instead of quieter, and what he sees has his heart thumping and swelling with pride. Between Hob’s legs, coming out of his folds, are two white hind paws.

Instinct makes Hob draw his legs back, his face scrunching up in pain as he pushes. He's exhausted, Dream can see it, and so he reaches down with the hand that isn't busy holding their first child and gently tugs at the legs of their second as long as the contraction lasts.

It makes Hob yell and push some more, which is good. As the second kitten slowly emerges it becomes clear that it's got its paws up by his head, so Dream slowly, carefully pulls out the arms one by one.

Hob's head has slumped back onto the bed, his eyes closed. He must be so tired.

“You are magnificent, my pet. Such a gift you are giving me. I promise you, you are almost done.” He can feel the little body rotate, so he places the black kitten down onto the bed. It mewls pitifully.

“I know, my darling, you are missing the warmth, but I promise you that the small wait is worth it,” Dream soothes. “Your sibling is about to be born, and then you will be together again.”

He can see the next wave approaching on Hob's face as it scrunches up, a small wail turning into a hoarse scream rasping through his throat. Dream gently helps guide the head of the white kitten out of him, again with just one push. Hob is so strong, almost as if he is made for this. Dream is so, so proud of him.

Their second child is a little different. It's got no horns, but very big, soft ears that resemble Hob's, and dark brown eyes, peering up at him.

When he places them into Hob's arm, he makes an executive decision to break with protocol and call the servants in early. They are supposed to be alone until Hob has passed the afterbirth, but the unexpected twin and Hob's exhaustion call for more help.

He helps Hob up into the bed, heedless of fluids and mess. Sheets are not what's important right now. Hob needs rest, and food, and maybe warm milk with a generous helping of honey for his throat.

The servants, who bring sheets and warm water and cloths, find their heavily purring king wrapped around Hob and not one but two eagerly nursing kittens. Dream alternates between grooming each of them with his tongue.

When more servants arrive with food and water, Dream feeds Hob, bite by bite, sip by sip. When Hob drops off into an exhausted sleep, Dream curls around him, making himself into a nest, making sure Hob and their kittens are safe and protected.

Now Dream has three of them to spoil. He can't wait.

🦒Anon

Akaksjshdhaah never apologise, we need more vaguely erotic birth stuff around here!!! This was gloriously written, I love all the little details. I'm now absolutely obsessed with Dream being the one who delivers their children every time Hob gives birth!!! Oh, and the kittens being a combo of Dream and Hob, that's so cute as well. A cat with horns will be a magnificent heir to Dream’s throne indeed!

I love that they didn't know they were having twins, hehe. I wonder if that's Dream’s fault, since cats tend towards multiples and cows don't so much? I think he'd be very proud of himself for giving Hob two kittens. Hob is just glad the kittens are pretty small, so he didn't get absolutely enormous during his pregnancy. Then again, he may not be so lucky next time!

Thank you for contributing to the cow!Hob brainrot <333

#🦒 anon #the sandman #dreamling #nsft #cow hob #cw birth #cw lactation #cw pregnancy #cw mpreg #cw hybrids

[lpsotd]

Could i request Gia Giraffi (#1-202) for LPSOTD? I really like their mold!

Sincerely, giraffe anon. 🦒

todays littlest pet shop of the day is ... gia giraffi #1-202 !! for you, giraffe anon !!

#🩷.requested #giraffes 🦒 #giraffe anon 🦒 #needs ids #lps #littlest pet shop #kidcore #toycore #y2k #2000s #toys #early 2000s #2000s toys

[writingsofwesteros]

Bloopers are just filled with Tywin and Stev trying to say their dialogue,but their babies want attention so they just start saying mama or papa over and over again.

They're trying to discuss something serious like Viserys' disease,and then the kids who are supposed to be on the ground playing start tugging on their clothes, saying "papa/mama up up"

Some of them make it into the final cut.

-🦒

!!!!!!

LOVE ALL OF THISS

Stev just automatically picks her babe up and continues speaking. Her hand brushing their hair for a moment as they settle.

-- they so pick up one of Viserys' toys oopsie

#au #celeb doe hotd series #celeb doe #🦒anon