#...because i would RATHER be grieving over somebody's transness than worrying if i'll be hatecrimed...

[uncanny-tranny]

It's really frustrating being trans sometimes with cis loved ones because other cis people will go, "oh but it's such a huge adjustment for them! They're grieving for your pre-transition self/they aren't used to the change yet/it's hard on them!"

It's just so frustrating that people forget that trans people's feelings on this matter, too. Cis people aren't the only ones who have adjustments to make. Frankly, as much as I sympathize with cis people in this position, I can't help but be really jaded about it because so often, cis people jump to the defense of other cis people and they will seemingly forget to or refuse to give the same grace to trans people.

#trans #transgender #lgbt #lgbtq #ftm #mtf #nonbinary #like at what point is it 'they aren't used to it yet!' and it morphs into 'that person is actively refusing to acknowledge you' #i'm at a point now where i have been out as trans for half my life. at what point is this willfully refusing to see *me* #it's just amazing that it doesn't matter what the trans person could do because it's their fault for bringing 'burden' onto cis people #i UNDERSTAND that it can be hard for family for instance to flip a switch with their trans loved one... #...but i can't help but notice that so often it's because they *refuse to try* #why is it that cis people can do almost anything to trans people but trans people must be perfectly understanding and perfectly... #...content with whatever cis people in our lives have to say about how hard it is on THEM... #...like that's insulting to me. imagine being so willfully incompassionate... #...i'm worried about if i'm safe in my own workplace or in my gym or in a medical setting... #...i feel like we need a sense of scale about who is most affected by transness in this scenario... #...because i would RATHER be grieving over somebody's transness than worrying if i'll be hatecrimed... #...there's a difference in the experience between a trans person and the cis people in that trans person's life learning to adjust to... #...that person's transness. which is why i don't think it's comparable to say that cis people have it just as hard in this case #transphobia #transphobia tw