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#I could recognize him by his voice
ashes-in-a-jar · 2 months
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Mixed feelings about the Jon mention in this one tbh
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sysig · 24 days
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Homesick (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#Helix#ZEX#DAX#Hhgghghhhh ;;;; ♥#Have I mentioned I love them lately#ZEX recognizing DAX's voice in Dexter is /so/ good ugh#For so many reasons! The implicit trust! How Dexter is able to manipulate him even unwittingly just how much of an effect he can have!#But also of being able to be honest with him in a way that he won't let himself be with other humans because well they're human#ZEX is terrible in many ways that I love him for deeply <3 His biases let him self-sabotage so easily haha#He has so much to unlearn from VUX propaganda even being as open-minded as he is! Well also in part Because of his open-mindedness lol#Fetishism rather ♪ Seeing humans as a monolith and getting so hopelessly swept up in his attraction across the board#He's a complex individual with a long history rooted in what and who he is! I like him very very much!#His biases cut both ways of course - since Dex has a familiar voice he of course must be a VUX! And here he could be ;;#Someone who just by the nature of his familiarity is safe but to actually listen to and validate him ugh ;;♥#The thing that kills me the absolute most is that Dexter /could/ give this to him - but won't#He has his voice his cadence his accent his way of speaking - and yet#At least if DAX was actually here he could offload some of his emotions properly rather than bottling everything up#ZEX keeps a lot of things to himself :( Like he can't bear to burden anyone else with them - or else his pride gets in the way haha#He's so condescending towards humans to his own detriment <3#At least if he had DAX he'd have more-or-less an equal - someone he could share his pain with ;;#As well as the comfort of validation and something - anything - to keep him grounded and tethered to his life#Comfort is just as precious a commodity as information - allies - weapons - supplies! It's all about balance <3
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somniorumfactus · 2 months
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i'm being so embarrassing about aaron tveit this week. literally grow up you do NOT have to watch american horror stories because he's in two episodes
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rayroseu-reblogs · 3 months
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just thinking about this thery that Crowley might be one of the original disney villains LSDKJDK like how Maleficent (Thorn Fairy) is a real person in TWST that once lived in Maleficia's castle.... Like he's actually Diablo not twisted from that character yk
also would explain why hes so heavily maleficent inspired lol
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twpsyn-who · 2 years
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AU where Eddie is a radio host and Steve is listening to him every night.
Okok, so Steve found out about it once when he couldn't sleep and did go on a drive around the town to clear his head. And he's not a big fan of metal or rock (because that's the kind of music they play) but the host's voice is calm. Relaxed. Steve doesn't know himself what it is about that voice, but it makes him feel safe. So, every night he couldn't sleep or he would wake up from nightmares he would play the radio and listen to the host talking for hours. Steve isn't sure when he began imaginating that person being next to him, holding him close while talking about random things. When he began wondering how he looks, how he might be as a person...
Meanwhile Eddie is having the biggest crush on that one guy working at Family Video and he thinks both employees might like the same gender but he's not sure and he doesn't wanna risk flirting with the guy and get punched in the face and banned from the only place renting movies in their shitty town. So he's pinning hard. Totally not coming in there daily just to see the guy. Making a little bit of small chat with the girl cuz somehow he never gets the guy at the register and the girls always offer to help him up so he doesn't get to actually talk with the dude.
Robin 100% notices the guy comes daily and is a little sus of him, but she doesn't know if he's there for Steve or for her cuz damn is he giving mixed signals.
Yes Eddie complains about it sometimes at the radio, but makes sure to be vague enough so people wouldn't know he, a guy, is pinning after another guy. Meanwhile Steve is dense as fuck and can't connect the dots.
Is a whole shit show. They finally get introduced to each other via Jonathan Byer.
#'So how do you know Jonathan?' 'Oh. He's my ex's boyfriend. You?'#Eddie 'I can not tell him that Jonathan is my ex' Munson - 'I sell him drugs from time to time'#Idk I just wanna Steve to fall in love over Eddie's voice#also Steve listening to Eddie talk and paying the price for it by being forced to listen to metal 👌🏼👌🏼👌🏼👌🏼#this could also work as post season 'whatever season Eddie died in' if Eddie graduated when he was supposed to and his smitten ass couldn't#recognize Steve as yk King Steve Harrington#stranger things eddie#stranger things#stranger things steve#stranger things robin#steddie#stranger things steddie#steve harington#steve harrington#eddie munson#robin buckley#ok before anyone comes at me for the prev tags - I had at some point this vague idea for a multiverse AU for stranger things and some#variants of Eddie showed up to save this Eddie and they all found out at some point they have been dating Nancy's exes (with this Eddie#pinning over Steve aka Nancy's ex and another Eddie dating Jonathan aka Nancy's ex in that universe- cuz in there Nancy got together with#Jonathan first then they broke up and she got together with Steve- and that other Eddie who's dating Billy aka Nancy's ex but they lasted#only 3 weeks so idk of it counts)#they also came to the conclusion that they have no taste in man but that's another thing altogether#anyway the conclusion is that I'm a multishiper and I love to ship Eddie with people and why there are no ficts of Eddie and Jonathan :(#I would write one myself but I don't know the plot of the show or Jonathan's personality rip#I should read more Jonathan centric
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magentagalaxies · 9 months
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re-editing some stuff for the buddy cole doc trailer rn (bruce sent me his notes and they were all very good just a few changes to make it even better) and i keep thinking about how one of my professors who knew kith last year one time interrupted me in the middle of telling him a toronto story after class and was like "y'know you actually remind me a bit of bruce. you have very similar speech patterns" and now as i'm having to hear my voice and bruce's voice back to back on this editing timeline i'm like oh shit we do talk similarly
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polyamorous-elevenv2 · 11 months
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henderhop harry potter au, in which El is in a quidditch team and Dustin is a quidditch commentator
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eyivibyemi · 5 months
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✧ I won’t really write descriptions for these, but see original post tags for explanation/commentary on the song snippet ✧
#This was literally just off the top of my head improvising words that rhyme (as is obvious from me rhyming the word#'on' with the word.... 'on' (what's going ON my name is ON' etc. lol) but after actually thinking about it this kind of seems a little#sinister?? why is his name on the news? why is he fleeing town? makes me think of of some guy who's killed#someone or is finally getting caught for his crimes so one last stop before he flees town is he returns home to his husband (who he#calls Hummingbird sometimes I guess) and is like 'erm... tee hee.. I can't tell you why but I shall leave. farewell' etc.#also 'I guess I could show you' having a bad implication like.. yeah I COULD show you the dead bodies and evidence of my crimes#but I will spare you from that and simply let you live in ignorance (at least until you see the news at 10.. but I will be long gone by#then.. eating green beans somewhere lol).. ANYWAY.. 100% unintentional but you could actually almost read some sort of meaning#out of this one. until the green beans part ghhbjb.. I try so hard for everything to just be meaningless gibberish#that has no connection but I suppose sometimes a connection can be made. alas.. a perhaps accidentally Dark seeming song snippet#OR alternate theory. uhh... actually his name is on the news for a good reason. he donated all his money to charity and now#he's fleeing town just because he's embarassed to be publicly recognized.. a shy philanthropist OR an evasive murderer#BOTH versions of him like green beans. which is the truth? up to listener interpretation lol.. Also I#still find it immensely funny for some reason to do this lower sounding style of singing. which not that I really care about like having a#Broad Range or something since I don't think it'd even be possible to have one in my position (as someone#with zero musical/vocial training/etc.) BUT because part of what I find fun is like.. experimenting with all different sorts of sounds#and also doing choir type stuff. So then I do want to be able to sound like multiple people.. if that makes sense? I want to have a really#high voice and the a really low voice and have them sing together and it sounds like a duet or something when it's really just one person.#etc. Thus have a passing interest in learning to adopt different singing styles if I can. because then that's funny and I can do a wider#variety of things like it's all different characters or something as if all the song snippets are done by different people or etc.#(maybe just part of the nature of it being experimental).#And the low voice is always the goofiest sounding to me and very 'fake' seeming I guess#like blatantly is just someone putting on an affect or whatever but still in a kind of fun jokey way lol#beepo tag
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sluttyten · 1 year
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crying laughing about the drama in my life right now😂😂
#so my work friend got fired yesterday because of bullshit reasoning rught#and so tonight I’m out in public telling my best friend about it#but like there’s no one around at the moment when we’re talking about this because it’s right after a movie we went to see#and she pushes the door of the theater open and we are the last ones leaving this showing ok#and she opens the door and she’s shit talking my boss because she once worked with me a long time ago so she knows him#plus I’ve given her all the details I know about this dumb situation#and who should walk by right as we fucking open that door??#my boss’s boss…. the one who fired my work friend yesterday and who we were also lowkey shut talking#so I immediately shut the fuck up because he knows me well enough he could recognize my voice and/or my face even if I’m out of work and out#of uniform luckily he keeps walking straight and we walk in a different direction but I’m like ‘that was *insert boss’s boss’s name*’ so we#are both laughing like oh shit 😂😂 and she’s like damn hope you’re not the next one to get fired now which like cmon I don’t think they can#fire me for that even if I was saying this stuff at work#but we walk outside towards her car and we get close and realize that his truck is like 3 away from her car and I’m like hiding at this#point so he won’t see me bc he definitely went out a different exit door than us and pulled out of the parking spot right as we reached her#car but I’m like…. what are the odds of running into him here? he doesn’t even live here so I wouldn’t have thought he’d be hanging around a#and going to see a movie on a Thursday night by himself instead of driving home since he lives like 3 hours from here
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louismygf · 1 year
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lucky again lyrics
#i love this song. i love it so so much....:(#louis said i can interpret it in anyway i want to so im interpreting it as kind of a love letter to himself#hes saying he was just a regular guy once but he was just lucky once bc of xfuk and his time in 1d#theres this maturity in there where he accepts the criticism people throw at him bc 'he must have incredible luck to get picked'...#bc ''his voice isnt that impressive or that hes not enough''#he accepts those....‚ but then he says he could be lucky again in his next endeavors. in his solo career#in fitf interviews i've noticed how he keeps saying he's ''lucky enough'' to be making the music he wants to make#to share his music without... really worrying about money or the means to make his own festival or etc#fame (and especially at the level 1d had) can really make you lose your way#louis once ''chased radio'' by following the trends‚ by having those collabs w steve & bebe#not speaking for him but im guessing those songs (or the sound at least of those songs at least) didnt make him fulfilled‚‚#but now. he figured it out‚ and he made his way back to a life he would choose.#i'm a hard man to find (meaning he lost himself along the way) but HE figured it out and he loves himself for that 😭 <- my interpretation#idk i think it's a self-love song and he's recognizing his own strength by pulling himself out of that darkness/madness#and finding clarity in how he wants to live his life or how to manage his career from now on#he dresses songs up as love songs directed to his partner so well#in this song its probably supposed to be about him & a lover getting back together but for me it feels autobiographical#the superman lyrics are really good too 😔😔😔#rrghhrgr i just think these lyrics are so good . many layers to them. it's one of the most hopeful in the album :‚)#very curious as to what louis thinks of this song and what sentiments he can share about it#oh god i havent even talked about the first verse🥺#you give and give until it's gone away. in his relationships‚ in his career‚ in 1d most especially.#i see how hard youve worked to be yourself GOD. this ties in w the negative side comments he keeps getting. way back then (xfuk) & even now#hes. just reassuring himself. it's a feel good song for himself (tbh hearing the song is so uplifting & motivating i love itttt)#YEAH ok enough. again‚‚‚ i. want to hear louis speak ab this song i hope he does somehow....‚#he accepts he was lucky for being put in a band like 1d but he also accepts and affirms the hard work he's done in his life#and that... he could be lucky again....:)#louis it's just bad luck for now 😭❤️‍🩹 you'll be lucky again !! rest up & gws‚ dont be too hard on urself ily🫶🏽#also just to be clear those critics r wrong ok sure luck was involved but what really made louis get picked is his perseverance
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icharchivist · 1 year
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If I can recommend something in return, Final Fantasy XV is a really fun rpg, if you're into those kind of games anyway lol. The four main characters are really likeable and it's pretty easy to get into, although the plot itself is kind of scattered everywhere over a movie, a series, multiple dlc's etc. Other than that, it's a banger with cute birds in it, maybe you'd like it too :)
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wAIT WERE YOU S SERIOUS
I was about to answer with a joke because i thought you knew but i
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sweetie.
(i was talking about replaying it just a few days ago it's so funny i genuinely thought you knew and you were joking knowing i was talking about it recently dLKFJDLF)
But hey at least, i can reassure you on that, you ARE correct that i would like it, i would in fact like it really much. Though trying to get me into it with "there's cute birds :)" while trying to hide the soulcrushing emotional grief this game puts one through is truly outstanding.
And yeah other than that i've been a ff7 fan for a very long time, have played the 1997 game and the prequel so many time, though i've never finished my playthrough of the remake. (and i watched playthrough of DOC and ofc watched the rest)
as FF goes i'm a bit unevent as in, i own a lot of them, i started a lot of them, but i didn't get too far in them all for various reasons DDLKFJDLKF
so, in a way, you ARE correct this would totally be my type of things! so hourray? ;D
Take care!
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0rionz-belt · 2 years
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I JUST REMEMBERED WHO HE IS HOLY SHIT HOW DID I FORGET ABOUT HIM??? WE HUNG OUT ALL THE TIME—
#for context: i found one of my vent posts from 3 or so years ago in which i mentioned a bunch of people i used to friends with#There were two names on that list who i could not for the life of me remember anything about. no face or memories or voice or ANYTHING#it actually took a few days or so of brute forcing my brain to even remember what my brain associated their names to their appearances#like i could remember that the girl i forgot had curly hair like mine but that was all.#and today i saw someone who i now can recognize as looking like him#and it just clicked in my brain and i felt a chill wash over me#but it makes the fact that i forgot him like i did so much more concerning#because i had been giving my brain the benefit of the doubt and letting myself think that maybe this was a guy i didnt know for very long.#But now I know that this was a very good friend of mine who I knew for multiple years in elementary and hung out with almost every day.#i can remember his voice and where we talked to each other after school and how tall he was and his most noticeable features.#I have thought about those years if my life countless times within the past few months purely because of all the shit that happened there.#stuff that formed me as a human being. the good the bad and the flat out weird as fuck.#and somehow NONE of those memories of him ever showed up.#its incredibly upsetting to me. i value nostalgia and sentimentality to a high degree.#ive kept old apps on my phone YEARS after ive stopped using them out of fear that all the convos and data will be erased.#and its troubling to me that i still can't remember anything about that other girl except for her name and hair and when i knew her.#its so fucked the human brain is so weird. literally this is why im a psych major.#vent
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gludgenbell · 2 years
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do you play hades? The video game? Who's your favourite character?
Yes!! I love hades
Been dying to actually draw one of the characters but I doubt I'll serve them any justice
Zagreus is best boy, but I love Thanatos! He's just a little guy,,
After him is Zag, after him is Hypnos, and Megara is really starting to grow on me but I really love Tisiphone
She's a real treat
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rowarn · 19 days
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cw: gun play, throat fucking with a gun im sorry, simon coming untouched, masturbation (reader) I NEEDED TO GET THIS OUT OF MY BRAIN SO unedited
simon with a gun kink that he's kept hidden would be crazy.
imagine ur big, beefy husband coming home after a long deployment. he's tense, his fists are clenched tight and it's clear he's got a ton of steam he needs to blow off.
at first, you expect a normal night together of him plowing you into the mattress so hard that the bed creaks and hits the wall with every thrust. the kind of fucking that leaves you trembling for 15 minutes after you've finished and cleaned up. the kind that has him pulling you into his arms to soothe and coo at.
but something is different this time.
he starts removing his gear one by one as usual but instead of removing the holster with his gun and safely placing it down, he unholsters the gun completely.
you're watching with bated breath as he unloads the weapon, carefully pulling it back and peering into the chamber. you're watching his hands move, admiring how strong his fingers are and how the veins in his hands bulge out with every movement
you deviously excited by the time he approaches you -- the gun still in his hand.
he brings it up, placing the nozzle against your chin, finger hovering off the the trigger. but you know how well-trained he is -- how good he is at his job. you know that he could have that finger on the trigger in a milisecond, faster than you would even be able to comprehend.
"open," he orders, a voice that sends shivers down your spine. it's firm, rough, authoritative. it's a tone you imagine he uses when he's on the field.
soliders bow to his every whim and you're no better. but unlike those who are trained to obey him because it's their job -- you obey him because you know if you do, you'll get the sweetest reward in the world; that thick, full cock still hidden in his pants.
your panties are already wet and sticky and your brain’s already feeling fuzzy by the time you open your mouth. 
the shock of cold is the first thing you recognize followed by the tang of metal as the weapon settles on your tongue. your lashes flutter as you look up at your husband, face still obscured by his balaclava but his pretty, brown eyes burn holes into you nevertheless.
he slowly and carefully slides the gun deeper into your mouth until it presses against the back of your throat and you involuntarily gag. a groan rips from his cheeks as he watches the tears gather on your lashline.
"that's it, pretty," he coos, "bet you wish that was my cock huh?" you nod your head as best you can with the weapon lodged in your throat, "maybe i'll give it to you if you put on a real nice show for me."
his words take a moment to register in your fuzzy brain but once they do, your hand is flying down between your legs at record speed. you slip it beneath the band of your panties, barely lifting his shirt that you're wearing out of the way so you can finally find relief in the ache that has settled in your cunt.
your folds are wet and sticky as they part around your fingers and you struggle to swallow around the gun in your mouth. there's no give to the metal and drool begins to dribble down your shin in long, thin strings.
simon's cock is hard, heavy and leaking against his thigh. this has been one of his best kept secrets, to watch you submit to his gun -- to the weapon he has used to murder countless people with.
and here you were, doing as you're told, throating his gun while you play with your pretty cunt. he can hear how wet you are, can see the way you desperately hump your own hand trying to get your fingers deeper and deeper. but they'll never feel as good as his, you both know this.
so all you can do is tearfully look up at him through clumped lashes as you choke and gag on the gun he continues to keep stuffed down your throat.
his cock throbs at the thought of being where his weapon is now. he envies it.
you mutter something, muffled and incomprehensible but he knows what you're saying. he can see the way your pupils blow out, hear the way your breathing grows erratic and choppy. you're trembling and breathless, messily jerking your hips into your own hand as you desperately look up at him -- begging for anything to push you over the edge.
his finger finally lands on the trigger of his gun and he sees your eyes widen but the desperate, teary look you give him only tells him more of what you need.
there's a muted, empty click when he pulls the trigger. the gun is empty, you both know this -- but it sends you over the edge anyway.
simons cock twitches and twitches, balls tight and heavy before he's spurting his load down his thigh at the sight of you cumming on your own fingers and moaning around his gun.
the hand holding the weapon trembles as he cums untouched at the entire scene. you pull your head back, gasping for air before pulling your hand out of your panties.
simon lurches forward, you don't even have time to react before he's taking the sticky, messy, cum-covered fingers into his mouth.
he's on top of you, pressing you down beneath his weight, the gun tossed and forgotten on the bed because now all he can think about is fucking you into the mattress. <3
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hxltic · 9 months
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ghost yellin pt. 2!! (and 2k followers. omg.)
(mention of blood n knives n stuff in here)
pt. 1~~~
It was still early in the morning when your puffy eyes blink open. Despite the mission that had your arrival around 3-ish in the morning, it was still the crack of dawn, which meant the start of your day, mission or not.
The warmth you had longed for encased you, but today, it felt unfamiliar.
You hadn’t forgotten about yesterday (or earlier today). And even though what happened upset you, you’d still wanted him, so you could feel the comfort your father never gave you after an argument. You’d never received a genuine apology from him, just an offer for new shoes or to go to your favorite restaurant that day.
Even in anguish after what he did, you still wanted his touch. Or that may have been what you thought, because now you were peeling his strong arms off you, and creeping to the bedside. You cautiously swing your legs over and slowly step to the door, but even though you were going unbelievably slow, the pain underneath your feet made you wince.
“Wait—”
There’s a gruff voice that your back is turned to, making you jump at the realization he was awake. You had been taught all your life to fight when your fight or flight response flickers, but he noticed how you almost bolted towards your room.
He had been awake the whole time. He’d vouched to himself he wouldn’t close his eyes until your breaths were regular again, but even after they had, he’d barely gotten any sleep. If he had tears left to cry, one would’ve slipped.
Whenever he did fall to the night, in any circumstance, his body physically would prevent him from staying such. He was a light sleeper to another extreme. His body was trained by none other than trauma and instinct. So when he felt you raising his arm, he’d awakened and watched you do everything silently.
He would’ve said something, but he didn’t know what. An apology would sound fake in this situation.
Ghost was a hands-on man, so he moved. His large body flipped the covers off him and hastily brought itself to you.
The last time you’d let him get close, he screamed in your face. You took an involuntary step back, but had you thought about it you probably would’ve taken it anyway. His quick steps pause.
He gazes into your frozen eyes, glistening and pretty even in upset, but underneath carrying fear and shock.
Seeing him, one side of you wanted to apologize for not taking your job seriously, even though you did, or say you were sorry for the other things he mentioned. And you may have when you were 13, but you were a strong woman that built off men’s bullshit over the years, so you hold your ground.
He shrunk himself and moved effectively before you. No unnecessary movements.
“Please. Wait.”
You could tell he was trying to make his voice soft, but the octave and accent just did not allow it. He was trying though.
Do you book it, or stay?
You stay, to hear him. He recognizes your stance as one specifically military-taught, ready to move.
“I didn’t mean to yell at you. I should’ve been better,” he started. You’d come to realize even with small issues, he was an okay apologizer. “I’m sorry. You’re the last person who deserved that.”
He inspected the way you heard him but just stood there awkwardly. You were never awkward around him. In fact, he was the awkward one.
His heart dropped at how visibly uncomfortable you looked. He wanted to touch you—to take all your problems away, but it wouldn’t work this time. Not when he was the problem.
Ghost was the type of person to do anything for you, anything to get you back. You were the only one who saw him as Simon now, ever since the others died or were killed. He ruined that.
He let the mask get the best of him, finally turning into the murderous, scary man the world sees him as, everyone but you. You’d never been afraid of him, and he himself had changed that.
So in the silence he scans your beautiful eyes again, the brightness they usually reflect gone and replaced. You blink at him like a puppy. A small, scared puppy.
He’d made you cry. He’d made you cry.
He wasn’t expecting forgiveness, or your usual unconditional love, but the silence was too much to bear. He knows what he did, but he genuinely has no idea how he could make it up to you. Once you realize the conversation was over, and that’s all he had to say, you turn your head and limp past the doorway to your room. You were going to cry again.
But that was far from what he wanted to say.
He didn’t realize it when a tear of his own bundled up under his blonde eyelashes, a feeling so rare that people’s jokes about him being a robot could seem true. It had been so long, but watching you sadly walk away from him was enough.
The door was wide open, but he stood there, feeling more useless than he ever had.
These were the times he wished his mother was here. To tell him what to do. To spread the emotional knowledge of loving someone so much it pained you, something she had perfected over the years. Instead, he picked up the brutalities of his father. And he will never forgive him for that.
. .
You’d avoided him for an entire day, almost two, despite being in such close proximity and having to do everything with the squad. He didn’t know whether to leave you be or try again and again. Ultimately, he picked the first. That didn’t mean there weren’t subtle things to get your attention though.
He couldn’t think about yelling again. But it was only at you. So everyone else was graced with their lieutenant in a worse mood than he’s usually in, but they wouldn’t dare ask what was up or say anything to you. Actually, they had barely spoken to you like they had orders not to.
Ghost was rarely in the common room anyway, but now he was really tucked away in his quarters. He preserved his words, though even then they were still snappy. He had an attitude, yes, but he’d come to his senses enough to reflect and prevent himself from saying anything potentially hurtful.
He’d cherished the moments you had no choice but to be close to him a lot more than before, and his voice was barely even the tone of regular speech. Because now, he was scared.
He’d seen how bad relationships can turn, and it doesn’t help it was the man he’s seen all his life ruining what a woman gave him. He doesn’t want to be like that. And if he already has been, he tries to calm himself at night by running through his head “you’re already better than him by trying to fix it,” like a mantra. He’s cried the nights without you. He felt like he was floating away all the time, away from the Earth and the people around him. He barely knows himself anymore.
Little does he know, the time spent without him converted your sadness to anger. Rage.
He has the audacity to scream in your face? After all you do for him? After you put your life on the fucking line and take bullets for him every day?
With your father, it never did convert to anger, because you refused to let it. Being a child, you were way too dependent on him emotionally and physically. He was still your dad, you’d think.
And yes, while you loved Simon, there wasn’t the biological connection to pressure you to him. He was just a man. And if there’s anything you learned yourself, it was that you wouldn’t be pushed around by one.
So the day progressed on with an assignment. The troops were sent out, Ghost in charge.
He had made an order to surround the building, stay hidden in tall grass. A few would push in. They were armed and dangerous.
His voice was loud through the comms, going directly through the headset clear as day. Your team pressed forward alongside his. He had made every order around the fact that you needed to be right next to him, always in view, so he could keep his watchful eye out.
You crouched around the corner, waiting for command. You whisper in mic to your own squad, instructing them to watch for third-party while everyone’s idle.
The second he calls it, you all infiltrate right after smoke grenades set off. It was quickly cleared of the criminal within a few minutes because there weren’t many to take out, just a few in nooks and crannies, but one of them had caught you through a closet door. It had small blinded windows in it.
A quick sharp pain let you know there was a knife drilled into your side. It was small, and could be a lot deeper, but it still hurt like a bitch.
You had taken worse, so you gunned him down with a swift turn and ignored it. The adrenaline was medicine.
Once everyone returned to base with evac, people noticed the spot of red on your uniform but brushed it off as a battle scar. Until they saw the knife. It would be stupid to remove it.
“That looks pretty bad, you should get that patched up,” someone says. Someone you didn’t know, probably from another unit. You refrain from saying no shit and keep walking to the infirmary.
You finally decide remove it with added pressure to the wound, keeping the gauze close and the slim slit through your skin tight. The adrenaline was wearing off now and everything started to come back to you. You groan loudly when you touch it.
Red stains your fingers. It wasn’t deep but it had to be pulled out, and standing would be hard. You sit to see what you were doing.
“Fuck!” you yell.
The pain was ten times worse when you sat down, the fold of your body at the hip right underneath the opening. You feel like you could imagine the knife scraping other parts of your insides.
Suddenly the door opens. No one other than Ghost stands there, fully in gear, searching for the source of the cry. Once he locates you, you barely hear him murmur “bloody hell.” You glance up at him, then back down to what you were doing. He tries to ignore the equivalent stab in his heart at that, the one that matched the way his face drops at the sight of you. You would be able to see the white of his eyes through the mask if you’d look at him.
You were unconsciously trembling, attempting to mentally prepare yourself to pull the knife out slow. The man before you just watched.
“Get out,” you demanded.
“No,” he calmly replies. Once again, barely above a whisper, but heavy with accent.
You visibly roll your eyes and continue picking at the knife, trying to find the easiest way to retrieve it. Of course Ghost would take this time to be near you when you can’t run away from him.
He removes his gloves and opens the cabinets beside him, getting peroxide and other medical things. He walks to you with them in hand, and you bring it upon yourself to completely ignore him.
He steadily drops to a knee in front of you so you see eye to eye. You hiss when you pull at one side and it doesn’t work.
Softly, he breaks the silence, “When did this happen?”
No response. He was looking you dead in the eyes despite how horrible at eye contact he usually is.
“When did-“
“Earlier, Lieutenant.” You speak. He knows this was you digging at him. It worked, but he brushes it off.
He reaches his bare hands rid of the supplies up to help you. He was mad at nobody other than himself for not being there.
“Stop,” you shoo his hand away, tending back to your wound. Even though he wanted to help, he backed off.
To be honest, you had no idea what you were doing, and he’d probably had this happen a thousand times. He was inevitably better at medical anything compared to you.
“How did it happen?” He waits. Wasting time talking to him will have you bleeding out. The knife was a little under halfway visible.
“I was taking my job seriously, Lieutenant.”
He cringes at the words he��s shameful to call his own. He wants nothing more than for you to at least be on speaking terms with him, but even that he knows he doesn’t deserve. He sighs deeply.
“I’m sorry, let me help you. Please,” he begs.
“I don’t want your help, and you don’t want mine. So we can keep it that way.”
What he said that night was far from true; you did more than just help him. He was dependent on you. He surveys the way you hiss at the straining feeling, attempting to take deep breaths between tugs, but only making it worse. He won’t let everything you’re throwing at him break him down in this state.
“Grab it from the top, do it all at once. Then stop the blood immediately.”
You huff in annoyance at his words, causing yourself pain from your own irritation. But, he did know what he was doing, so you followed the orders. He inspects you.
You tug on the knife with a painful deep breath and moan at the pain, shutting your eyes. The view alone gives Simon whatever you’re feeling tenfold.
It only goes up about a centimeter. It hurt so bad though, your breaths were heavy and enhancing the stinging sensation. Your audible whimper was enough for the man in front of you to take action.
You almost forgot how mad you were at him from the pain, so when his hands reached up to you, you just let them. His right applied pressure to the sides. He couldn’t care that it stained his rough, pale hands. The left rests on your hand planted on the seat, then he instructs you to lay down. It’ll avoid scratching any more areas inside by stretching out.
“Relax. It’ll hurt, but you got it.”
You don’t respond to this, and stare up at the ceiling. You still didn’t want to look at him.
Simon has to remember you were still fairly untouched in comparison to his background in the military, the scars and scratches proof to where he’s been. He’s not used to being gentle. He’s around grown men for god’s sake.
And while he knows you’re strong, he wishes someone took the time to allow him some vulnerability back then.
You’re on your back, awaiting his next move. He hovers over you.
“I’mna to count to three, alright? I know you can do it.”
You blink, but he knows you can hear him. Somehow it hurts worse to breathe so your chest runs shallow.
“One,” he starts.
Were you ready? He was going to-
You scream loud enough to have the entire base questioning what was going on before he gets to three, but Simon’s face doesn’t falter from his soft expression as he accurately rips the object out of you. Your hands subconsciously reach for his, then grip him with a pure strength you didn’t even know you possessed. You yelled a long line of curses with tears pricking at the corners of your eyes until it all ended as fast as it came.
You were heaving and your face was hot, sweat gathering along your hairline.
“There you go,” he praises, his movements were quick and efficient. The tape was being placed over the filled injury. “Good girl.”
You were breathless, tired, and red. You wanted to lay down.
“It hurts, Simon,” you whisper.
“I know baby, I know.”
. .
You laid in bed with the dinner one of the soldiers brought you. Simon walks in sometime later, his hand cupped.
“You alright?”
He steps in beside your bed, sitting on the covers. He releases some painkillers right next to the water on your nightstand.
You just nod.
He nods approvingly back, then rests his forearms on his thighs. There’s an uncomfortable silence. An uncomfortable silence.
The ink on his arm was visible along with the scars he’s carried. Some new, some old. It’s a simple t-shirt that stops at the bicep, but he never likes to have his arms out because he’s never comfortable with them showing.
“I just wanted to say—”
“I…don’t want to hear it.” You shut him down.
“Please?”
His ocean eyes survey yours for some type of mercy, some hint you’ll hear him out again. He has concluded that he can speak, but the worst that can happen is you’ll stop listening. You can’t really walk away.
And this was the first time his please seemed to end with a question mark.
“I didn’t mean to yell, but I did, and it hurt you. Even though I just aided you, I did it as a partner. Not just a comrade. You are great at what you do, but you mean a lot more to me than just business—I love you, because you see me differently than everyone else.”
Knowing Simon, it probably did take him the whole day and a half to come up with that and relay it. This tugged your heart strings a little, but then it all came back to you.
“On top of calling me useless you yelled in my face. What were you so angry for anyway?”
Truthfully, he felt that had he told you the real reason, It’d make him look worse. But you deserved it.
“One of the soldiers in another unit looked into my background. Found out about an old mission and the people behind it.”
You hadn’t known much about Simon’s life, because he never talks about it, but you knew enough. It was the mission where he was set up. Betrayed.
You would be pissed too.
But his head hung low in shame, angry that he let an old part of him rekindle in the form of fury. He let out said fury on you.
“Regardless, it was uncalled for. Just think on it, yeah?” He pleads. He’s not sure what he’s telling you to think on, though he doesn’t know the active status of your relationship. But he understands how degrading what he did was, and he’ll never forgive himself for it.
But you already had an answer.
“I don’t have to think on it,” you say.
His head whips around, the sadness on his face replaced with shock, and the crinkles coming to form between his brows in confusion. He’d expected the worst, but the worst was what he deserved.
“I’m still very upset. But I don’t hate you. I want you to go to therapy,” you insist.
On the inside, Simon was thrilled. This is the best outcome, better than anything he’d conjured up in his head, and he’d been told a billion times to go to therapy. If it meant being able to hold you again, he’d stay the whole day on a little couch instead of downing prescribed medication that wasn’t working every night.
“I’ll think about what to do from there. But I don’t want it to happen again, because I promise I know what my decision will be the next time,” you declare. He took this message more seriously than he takes Price some days. There was a fire in your eyes to show him how serious you were, and that you’d get up extra close to him just to point your finger in his face if you could.
He understood you hadn’t forgave him, but was giving him some type of redemption. So he could prove himself.
And he was damn good at proving himself worthy of things, hence the Lieutenant in front of his name.
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