#LET'S START OFF THIS NEW YEAR RIGHT

[strong-with-the-sarcasm]

part 15 - we’re all misunderstood

"Me and all my friends, we're all misunderstood. They say we stand for nothing and there's no way we ever could." -Waiting On The World To Change by John Mayer

Masterlist Part 14

The Watchtower was a marvel of engineering and fortitude, constantly in orbit above Earth among the star-studded void of space.

Just a quick glance out of the meeting hall window had proved to the Regent that her little brother would love it here. He’d inherited the innovative side of Fentonworks more than she, so the combination of one of his obsessions and tech to fiddle with was a dream come true. 

(She’d inherited the ruthlessness of Maddie Fenton.) 

Batman, the Dark Knight her little brother had trusted and the father of her soulmate, tapped away at a tablet in hand before turning his focus to her at ease form, hands clasped behind her back. Wonder Woman stood at her side and Superman at the other. A flanking maneuver it seemed. 

The Regent would’ve been offended if they didn’t consider her a threat, despite her willingness to discuss war prevention between the Infinite Realms and the Living Realm. Her armor alone was meant to be intimidating at first appearance, but it was the woman sealed into it that gave off the vibes of ‘Approach with caution’. She was a Warrior, not a pacifist,and everything she presented about herself was meant to signify that. 

However, the Regent was trained by the Ancient of Peace and would demand a peaceful resolution to a crisis rather than conflict, even if the Liminal had no desire for a battle against the Justice League. 

Constantine was a familiar presence in the room. The Laughing Magician had a soft spot for her little brother, but she felt the claim she had of his soul. It was cracked and missing so many pieces, but it was still a good one. The Sad Trenchcoat Man might’ve been a career drunk and conman, but that didn’t mean he was unnecessarily bad. 

He wouldn’t be here if he was. 

The man in question spoke first, much to the obvious surprise of those present, “How’s Phantom?” 

Her helmet turned to face him down where he sat a few feet away, an unopened flask resting on his thigh, “He is fine. Would you like me to pass on a message?” 

Constantine seemed to relax for a moment before shaking his head, “Nah, the kid bugs me enough.” 

“Regent.” Batman interrupted. “We would appreciate it if you could answer some questions we have regarding some disturbing files we received from Phantom.” 

The Liminal nodded, “I suspected as much. I cannot speak much on behalf of the King or others not present, but I will answer what I can truthfully.” 

“Thank you, My Lady, for your willingness to discuss such things with us.” Wonder Woman offered with sincerity in her words. 

The Regent shook her helmeted head, “I’d rather peace than be across from one another on the battlefield, Princess.” 

“Wisely so.” 

The Knight tapped on his tablet again, a projection of one of the Ghost Files documents spreading across the wall behind the Bat, the man in question returning his attention to her. 

“Why does the King require a Regent?” 

If Bruce was being honest, which he was, he’d rather be anywhere else than here in the Watchtower about to helm peace talks between the Infinite Realms and Earth. He’d rather be eating dinner with his children, questioning Phantom about Jason’s whereabouts, or even on patrol- anywhere but here. 

It wasn’t even the presence of the armored woman who’d answered in place of the King Constantine had been asked to summon, rather Bruce wanted nothing to do with the Death Energy he felt in lapses radiating from the Regent that felt… cleaner than that of what Ra’s Al Ghul or Talia had. 

Bruce wanted answers. 

But he also wanted to be anywhere but here. 

He supposed it was his self-preservation instincts trying to get him away from the being that’s been summoned, he had no choice but to stay though. 

“The King is too young.” The Regent replied evenly, hands clasped in front of her stomach, much like Diana would when trying to demonstrate that she’s prepared to draw her sword at a given moment. “There is still much for him to learn and experience before he is ready for the Crown.” 

Batman hummed, even though Constantine spluttered in shock- “A kid defeated Pariah Dark in single combat?” 

“Yes.” 

“There are some questions that we would like to have recorded for the record, would you be amenable to this?” Batman interrupts, “We would also discuss public use.” 

Regent nods, helmet tinting a darker green as the Watchtower lights slant across it for a brief moment. “I accept, though there are some answers that are not mine to give.” The woman takes a breath, “I cannot give the identity of the King without his permission, nor can I discuss how or when he died.”

“Is there a particular reason why?” Superman asks. “It is considered taboo to ask a ghost anything related to their death because it can cause them to relieve it.” A pause, “Ghosts, or Ecto-Entites, are a fighting-based culture. They are beings of varying intelligence, thoughts, and emotions- sentient and sapient, much like humans and aliens. Capable of great things, both good and evil.” 

Bruce processed those words, a pit of horror forming in his chest. How many times has this woman said those exact words, hoping for them to be heard? They were eloquent, with the formality that hinted at diplomatic training, but with so much hope that it almost physically hurt. 

Capable of great things, both good and evil. 

Wasn’t that the choice Bruce made every time he put on the cowl? Anytime one of his kids got hurt and he felt such rage in his bones? He made the choice every day to do good and while it may not be great in the broader scale of things, it was to somebody somewhere. That was what it meant to be alive, to have free will, to exist. 

Now he finally understood why Phantom gave him the Ghost Files. 

He needed this. This confrontation of what it means to exist outside of Bats and Birds, the cowl and the mask, as a being. Would Bruce have listened had he not seen the Files? If he hadn’t seen the inhumanity committed upon the inhuman? What evil would he have perpetuated had he refused to listen? 

(Tim might think he had been the only one to watch the video of Danny Fenton’s death.)

(He was wrong.)(What if he hadn’t heard the wail?)(What if he hadn’t seen the rebirth of Fenton to Phantom?) 

With all the bloodshed the GIW had on their collective hands, they would not go quietly. 

The Regent had emphasized their zealot tendencies, hypocritical ideology perpetuated by the Drs. Fentons and somewhat lackluster training, but exceedingly advanced technology geared explicitly towards Ecto-Entities in her testimony to the Justice League in the hours that followed. Several examples from the Ghost Files were explained and expanded on, including the destruction of the Casper High Gym which resulted in the death of a faculty member and the maiming of a student. Evidence of the town roads being utterly demolished, what looks like the aftermath of war being the norm for the citizens as they try to go about their daily lives. 

She had prepared to discuss all the above, and gone through various questions she’d been expecting from the League, but she had steadfastly avoided thoughts of the GIW’s unethical experimentation. Naturally, the League began this particular section with the Files’ opened to what Danny, Tucker, and Sam had included, a warning issued to all present that what they were about to watch was grotesque and to leave the room if they felt unable to hold the contents of their stomachs. 

The Regent was an older sister, a daughter, a leader, and a warrior- but she was still only able to take so much. (She hadn’t known the Fentons recorded Danny’s Phantom’s vivisection.)

(She hadn’t known they called each other sweetie and fudge-kins while digging in his chest cavity.)

Fury was a familiar enemy and friend in equal breaths, existing in the space between her ribs and her heart, trapped by a cage of bone and will. 

Fury echoed by her mirror image that entered the camera frame, sword first and merciless as she gutted Jack Fenton. 

(Regret was nowhere to be found.)(Shame had no place here.)

“By Realms Law 2127 subsection 32f paragraph 3: liminals, mortals, all in between may be promptly judged and or executed on grounds of threat to End a protector spirit or child. May also be decreed as battlefield law when faced with a sufficiently armed opponent and or external force.” The Regent recited monotonously. “Drs. Fenton also could have been tried for Invasion by opening the portal, but Phantom was able to give them a pardon.” 

“On what grounds?” Wonder Woman questioned, “He is a protector spirit, yes?” 

“Yes, which allowed the previous Law to be enacted and legal. By him acting within Amity Park and using Fenton tech to catch Ghosts, he gave them a pardon by an unspoken alliance.” 

“An alliance they broke,” Batman this time was clearly angry too in his clenched fists were any indication, “when they vivisected Phantom.”

“Yes.” The Regent continued, “Make no mistake, I uphold the Realms Law to the best of my abilities and expect my subjects and my council to do the same. We are a people and people have societies, societies have structures and without that, we would be no better than what the GIW claims us to be.” 

“Well spoken, My Lady.” Wonder Woman complemented, clearly taken by the Regent’s speech. 

“This is all gory and horrifying, but we still haven’t talked about preventing a bloody war.” 

While he’d been quietly observing the meeting, minor mutterings here and there, Constantine remained the only Dark member present. The Regent was somewhat fond of the Sad Man, even without having ownership over his soul (or the majority of shards) he would remain a fond memory for the Nightingales. 

 “My Lady,” the Magician belatedly addressed her, clearly having recalled to whom exactly he was speaking. 

“Constantine,” Batman warned, “we’ll get to that.” 

“Indeed we shall. In fact,” the Regent twirled a hand in a graceful motion “the Anti-Acto Acts is the main point of contention on the docket and allows that,” now she thrust a pointed finger at the Files’ section on ‘experimentation’, “to be legal.” 

“It’s been discussed, previously, to bring these laws before the UN with a censored version of the Ghost Files.” 

The Regent nodded almost immediately, “If you can, yes, but I would recommend leaking some of the data for the public to judge.” 

“Amity Park, for instance?” Superman asked, “Let the public choose a side and put pressure on the UN.” 

“Perhaps.” WW nodded, “Though there is likely chance that blame will be shifted onto the Ghosts solely for the damage.” 

“We can show the footage of the attacks that caused them.” Batman interjected, “As well as the videos of Phantom protecting Amity’s citizens at risk to himself.” 

The Regent agreed, “There are also videos of teenagers practicing drills for Ghost and Ghost Hunter attacks.” 

“What about sitting for an interview for a newspaper?” Superman suggested, “I can get a reputable reporter to conduct it.” 

“That can be done.” 

The Regent felt a slight tug on her Proto-Core, a shiver down her spine to follow- her little brother was trying to summon her back to him. Nothing urgent, not with just a slight tug, not an emergency. 

It had been quite a while here anyway and she missed her boys. 

“I’m afraid I am being summoned for a council meeting.” The Regent announced, “If I am needed again-“ 

She took a breath before turning to Batman, “You May summon me, Dark Knight, through your Lady’s Claim.” 

A friendly handshake with Superman, “Have your reporter meet me in the Ridge next Friday during the Witching Hours.” 

A clasping of arms with Wonder Woman, Warrior to warrior, “When this is settled, I would ask for a spar, Princess.” 

And the Regent was gone in a torrent of icy green-tinted mist. 

A/N:

Happy new year!

I can't believe it's 2024 already! Feels like I just got used to writing 2023.

As always, thanks to the wonderful beta @meditating-cat, who also let me who use them as a sounding board for ideas for the Regent earlier. I cannot wait to write those ideas, let me tell you.

As always, if you have any song suggestions please feel free to share and check out the masterlist for the rest of the series. It's always updated afterwards!

Thanks for reading!

#dp x dc #dp x dc au #dpxdc #dc x dp crossover #jazz fenton #regent!jazz #jason todd #anger management ship #hardcover ship #jazz x jason #batman #anti-ecto acts #let's get it #happy new year 2024 #lets start it off right with the end of the GIW

[cherrysnax]

havin the weirdest crisis of my life

#this is like. did related so im gonna sound completely uh #what’s the word. odd and shit for a sec okay? okay #so I’ve been here. hi im cheri silver yknow me for about 20 years total but jay used to front for years when we were in middle school #im not the. original host I guess but I’ve been around since #we were in the early single digits and never left #so im the host right? I existed to go thru the Trauma #but. it’s been my life for so long. my parents don’t know Her #they’ve only known me #but like. we’re finally starting to let go of that trauma #errr not let go but make peace with it. and we’ve been holding onto it for so long. I’ve been holding on to it for so long #but.. who am I without it? like yes that’s my trauma but also. is my purpose over?? is that why we haven’t been able to draw? #I’ve been the host for 20 years this is my life #my friends my gf my life my hobbies it’s mine not anyone else’s #I let others take the wheel when I can’t (or they forcibly do it for me) and jays been gone for like 3 years he only came back because I’ve #been being traumatized everyday recently. but like. will I have to go too?? #reintergration is not really our goal. never has been but like #if we do. will I be here or will She come back? we’ve had false alarms before but it’s mostly been decided that it’s my front my life #maybe im just triggered all the time and that’s why I feel extra out of it #less myself #New Traumas are happening to us everyday #but yeah. I dont talk abt this aspect of my life much but it’s so scary to think about #I’ll talk to Chevy when they get off of work tomorrow abt it if it’s still like. freaking me out #I am me. we are a bunch of niggas but I am me. #did niggas when the identity disorder makes them dissociate smh #😫

[kyouka-supremacy]

Mmmhh...

#(Basically rant on my last two posts) #I know I've said it before and sorry for coming off as annoying– #but I really wish we still had a central bsd blog on Tumblr like fy-bungoustraydogs or bsd-central or things of the kind. #I think now everyone rushes to post news first. And although there's merit to it in knowing news as soon as they happen‚ #in the long run the death of this kind of central official content ***fan*** blogs is such a huge loss of fandom spaces‚ #especially for the archiving purposes they solved. Especially today that T/witter and G/oogle have basically become unusable. #Literally. Literally. I've been doing official content archiving since I was 11 #(because that's the very specific kind of mental illness I have) #and let me tell you that the quality of web search and especially reverse image search only got worse– #in a way that is very evident and noticeable. Which is crazy tbh and not how things should work. #If anyone would like to start a bsd-central kind of blog I'll be the first one to follow. #Actually if anyone actually wants to establish it feel free to contact me and I'll be more than happy to share the resources I have!!!! #It just needs to be something multi-modded for a series of reasons I won't get into right now #I just can't personally do it (not as main admin at least) because that would be modding my FIFTH active bsd blog– #and that's a little too much even for me. #On top of some ethical concerns I have regarding whether it'd be fair for me to mod a fandom central bsd blog– #when I feel like I can't genuinely share the same amount of love for the franchise other fans share #On top of. You know. Getting a degree eventually hopefully. #Then years after the blog has been solidly enstablished and aquired enough credibility it could even open a free donations found to invest– #in buying and scanning and releasing bsd content that hasn't been shared yet like the guidebooks or illustration books or everything else– #for everyone to see... #The dream. (Is realistically never going to happen) (Won't stop me from daydreaming about it every day) #((Still salty I couldn't afford the guidebooks only due to the shipment prices. I *would* have scanned and uploaded them.)) #That was a long and idealistic rant. Kyotag out #Edit: *Modding my SIXTH bsd blog #Apparently I mod so many blogs I lost count of them

[deus-ex-mona]

rage is a ✨way of life✨

#found out that i successfully angered someone by not showing up to work on saturday lmaoooooo #and im just like… gOOOOOOD. BE MAD!!!!!!!!!!!! #mans has no room to be mad anyway. it’s his fault i had to ot for 7 hours to cover his work for him in the first place soooooooo #a nd he’s getting demoted next year and im ahauxucjsjjsjsjsjxjdhss #in other news im kinda annoyed by my mother’s (unfortunate) pressuring of me to go to the upcoming family christmas gathering :( #like no way manssssss i haven’t seen the extended fam since my grandma’s funeral and i’d like to keep it that way thanks~~~~~~~~ #and a c h r i s t m a s gathering of all places… m a n. im half expecting them to drag everyone to church to end off the gathering… #i wouldn’t put it past the hosting aunt to do that ngl. she had tricked me into attending a church service in the past and all… #like. man. there’s this local mall that has a similar name to said church service… #so ofc it’s normal to assume that said mall is what she was referring to when she said ‘let’s go to [insert name]!’ with no context right??? #and uggshdhdjjsjsjdjs i don’t wanna be introduced to my cousins’ kids as ‘auntie [insert nickname i hate]’ bc that’s lame #and m a n. i definitely don’t wanna interact with my cousins’ kids. i either don’t know or can’t pronounce (or both) their names #i only remember the oldest one’s name (bc he has a stereotypical frat boy name) and the one who’s named after a ninja turtle #but none of the rest. i think some of them have names from my cousins’ spouses’ home countries? dk about the others though #i’m 80% sure one of the girls was named something like ‘triceratops’ but that doesn’t seem right… #being named after a dinosaur sounds cool though… or any prehistoric creature really #if i could choose my own name i’d like it to be ‘coelacanth’ #just so i can say ‘i coelacan’t do it!!!!!’ if someone asked me to do something i don’t wanna do. the pun potentials are endless mans #huh. wow… i started this off with a mad coworker and ended it by turning into a coelacanth… how did we get here anyway…? #oh wells no one reads the tags anyway uehxudjdjdjsjsjss my secrets are ✨safe✨

[jedi-bird]

I'm back home, showered and in bed with my heating pad. I did not murder anyone at the event, which is good. We were lied to however, about what was required for us to bring, which I'm not surprised about. I don't want to have to repeat it all tomorrow, even if it's on a smaller scale. I'm tired.

But at least the ham tasted good and the crumble, while much less sweet than last time, was good and I didn't have to stay until super late. Small victories.

#vent post #look i like my in-laws but this year I'm just not feeling social #i sick of being judged because i need to sit in specific chairs and can't help with a lot of the cleanup #i get told in the same breath that a lot of my problems are probably because of my cats but then get asked if i want a new one #because someone has a problem cat they don't want to deal with anymore but they won't let it get adopted out #and also get told I'm probably pretty happy that mine are all starting to die off because i clearly have too many #no one told us there was going to be a gift exchange so we didn't bring anything #which is fine because we were planning to leave early anyway #I'm tired of dealing with people right now #I'm feeling very overwhelmed and at a breaking point #and i want to tell my partner that i don't want to spend my birthday helping my mother in law take down her tree #i don't want to have to cater to her on a day i already associated with bad things #i just want to lay in bed if I'm not allowed to go anywhere fun

[stairset]

I realize this could get me crucified in certain circles but as good as Andor was I really do think its fans can be truly insufferable.

#i'm sorry but so many andor fans just have this snobby ass attitude about it #and feel the need to act as if it's The Only Good Star Wars Thing Ever Made #and every other star wars thing should copy it #because clearly if the show's style works for THAT story it MUST work for every story right #it was annoying when the show was airing and it's annoying now #like idk maybe the people who described it as ''star wars for people who hate star wars'' weren't that far off #i already talked about all this in another post a while back #but y'know a new show just came out which means i have to put up with it again #even though there's really no reason to compare andor and ahsoka outside of ''they're both star wars shows'' #and most of it is just people bitching that ahsoka is more reference-heavy #which as i've also pointed out in previous shows. it's a sequel. #a sequel continues the story of a previous work that's literally the entire fucking point #like i'm sorry but when it comes to this show specifically i do not give a solitary FUCK about the casual viewer #it has been very explicitly and unambiguously billed as a direct sequel to rebels from the start #and it was announced 3 years ago which is more than enough time to get caught up #no one is forcing you to watch the sequel before the thing it's a sequel to #as far as i'm concerned if you watch a sequel before the first one that's entirely on you #you knew what you were getting into and you have forfeited any right to bitch about being confused #but anyway back to andor i'm not gonna let people being annoying about it affect my enjoyment of it #cause it IS a good show and i don't wanna end up resenting it just cause people are pretentious asses about it #but yeah i think certain people could maybe stand to get off their fucking high horses over star wars spin-off shows #shut up tristan

[finalfroevo]

wasn't meant for the direct tomorrow but

#aye you never know #gallo #dillon's rolling western #the last ranger #nintendo 3ds #nintendo eshop #aside from botw 2 news Im pretty much empty on anything else atm #but hey if dbh was started development in 2015 then released 3 years later #then if vanpool started on a new dillon right after -ideally- #development should be at a point where a trailer could be shown off #but I am #grasping at straws #and sick of a cold. let me have this (1) hope besides botw totk #id in alt

[bahrmp3]

.

#personal #now that the new year's has passed I feel like I can talk about it I did not have a good time lmao it started fine I guess? I was going to #play music for the new year but then mum made a comment about me still on laptop so I shut it bc ok fine let's not #then it was down hill from there? like I ignored it and was like let's not make a thing out of it so we are saying what we liked this year #/ what we want to do and mum goes and for my son I want x y z and didn't mention me so joe asks her and for if she has anything to say for #me? any wishes? but she doesn't lmao later on she goes (if only you would say what you want we do not know anything about you) #she didn't even mean it she said just to hurt like I was taking a video of this and lit off frame my face is dropping #later on she goes (and you didn't even say what you wish for us either) as she leaves and later when I'm talking to my brother #and I protest this he goes (welp what can I even say? like I told you before are pretty selfish) and idk what to say I was surprised I #don't think I'm selfish tho? I legit was the one to cook for us and got cake? I try so much but keep being labeled selfish this is the #second time he tells me that in the last two weeks I think and both are unfounded ngl anyway all of this pales in the last thing #so we call dad to say happy new year! Well joe does and I mean ok I was still pretty upset about what happened an hour ago so ofc I wasn't #cheerful when calling dad lmao but like I was saying all the right things anyway? but Joe kept gesturing at me to smile its a phone call #and after the phone call he has like (why are you always so depressed? if I were you and I finally got a laptop I would be flying from joy #why are you always so down? why can't you just be happy?) and I honestly don't know what to say lmao ok so I wasn't flying from joy with #my laptop but idk how to say it here but then like what's worst? being hurt and not a person recognising that you are hurt? and in fact #asking you why aren't you smiling? or idk being too depressed for others?? what's funnier is mum later on was like (don't let anyone words #change you you shouldn't yield to others) in reference to Joe's speech but like hello mama?? not 2 hrs ago??? #anyway so I asked her if I shouldn't be listening to her words then? and she was saying yes with confidence like does she not #see either how she hurts me? how she keeps hurting me voer and over and over??? #God I should have made that pizza and truly be selfish maybe I wouldnt have been hurt like that #tbd

[loverscrossmp3]

a girl will buy a new book and sunglasses and then her terrible, totally awful day will turn around to be full of LOVE AND LIGHT !!!!!!

#really though it was truly awful. one of the worst in a while but then went out and bought new sunglasses !! they’re very chic very french #and go incredibly with the fringe and leather jacket !! model off duty moment ! and THEN went to the bookstore to get foul lady fortune #which i’ve been steadily anticipating since last year !!! so excited to start it AHH!!!! #(though at the store had the most trouble finding it right. so i was with my mom n she went an asked some worker who was. a total bitch #let’s be honest. she. yeah. BUT went to a diff girl who was SO KIND! AND gave me 20% discount! fabulous!!) #love and light everyone !!!! LOVE AND LIGHT #someone shut her (liv) up! #oh AND!!! got a new wallflower for my room and it smells like AUTUMN and LEAVES and APPLES and it is FANTASTIC!!!!

[lunarharp]

a random draft where i was ramblingg about witch hat & art to myself for myself :)

rare time i feel like actually going off about the thing i’m having fun with right now in more detail ... but not on twt where strangers might try to discuss back at me lol sorry but that is scary. (not that you even have the room to soliloquy on there)

i love how there's characters for varying types of artists to relate to. people like agott who have been adept at drawing from a young age but feel overwhelmed by feelings of not meeting their expectations. and are driven mostly by feelings of wanting to prove their worth..

people like oru who have always been around the art but now are burnt out from commissions and wondering just what they're drawing for... and ones i relate to the most personally like coco and qifrey, who started drawing at an older age to the skilled people around them. like coco i'm so happy that i'm in the world of drawing(/magic) now and excited every day but also weighed down by fears that i'll never get to what i where i need to be after starting at this late stage and also whether i'm really cut out for this....

and like qifrey i only started drawing after a narrow escape from trauma... i started drawing to make sense of what my life is now, just as he was invited by beldaruit to become a witch because it was the only safe path he could take. (although i've not been through anything quite like what he's been through... ouagh)

and there’s tetia who just wants to draw to make other people feel happy about what she’s made, to have fun, and spread hope and happiness and gratitude. who feels so happy whenever someone thanks her for what she’s created - i understand now how it feels to want to thank them for thanking her and how making art, when you get a meaningful response, can be a truly warm communal type experience. but you do need that response - her overwhelming happiness when the dragon thing was happy and she said it was the first time she’d ever felt fully appreciated for her magic and it made her soooo happy. she had been drawing until then, but it was the last puzzle in place to make her realise the breadth of what magic can be for her.

and riche who is determined to not lose the “her”-ness from her art, doesn’t want to learn new techniques and become more regular and orthodox in style if it means she feels she’s losing something... i get that!!! precious autistic-coded child... the ways we feel about our art differ depending on our own mental landscapes. hahhhh... shirahama said she began this series because she was having a conversation with artist friends about how it feels like drawing just really is magic. i mean..... it is.

i think writing feels like magic too, and i’m glad i can do both now. any creation is total magic. i’ve drawn scenes that were in my head and that’s let other people see them and if i can trust their comments about it, has moved them in some way or at least let them imagine a scene or a situation that they wouldn’t have imagined otherwise. but it’s different from just telling someone about it. when you draw something, or write something it really exists now - outside of you. THAT’S SO WEIRD.

i liked drawing a lot of takarazuka things (before i realised i got kind of burnt out drawing all this transcore stuff that people were not exactly responding to because it’s so niche and weird lmao) but drawing fanart for something that also ONLY exists in art is so special. it’s not acted by real people. like.. they’re just little people that someone drew and now i draw them too. total magic. and she gets up and draws them every day the same as me...

i love that a manga isn’t just art, it’s storytelling too. doing both writing and drawing at the same time - it feels like such a perfect and fascinating combination of skills and facets of creation. i’m better at writing than drawing, so i don’t feel like i can express my original stories well enough in comic form just yet. but i might just get there.

the world is so confusing and overwhelming and terrible every day. only creation is something i can understand. sometimes i can’t understand it - when i feel REALLY bad, it’s definitely like, what’s the point. and i wish i had more things to experience at present than just creation - i want to be outside and just feel and be as well as create. and at some point i’ll definitely stop posting my creations online. but creating has become something that i don’t need to understand the reason for it - so at those times when i wonder what the real point to any of this is.... lately, i usually still create anyway. just as you’d still breathe and sleep even though you’re hurt and confused by the horrors of the world. it’s becoming how i express myself. i find myself drawing pretty much every day because it’s part of how i make sense of shit now and i naturally want to do it. not doing it is painful.

i hope this magic continues. i hope it becomes far more wonderful than i can even imagine from here.

and i won't lose.

#things really are different if you start drawing in your mid/late 20s or onwards. #you haven't developed your idea of yourself as an 'artist' at the time your brain was developing your identity. #but reading something that is basically saying- it's not too late and you have your own magic that only youan do... is so heartening. #also the manga is very gay. it's not THAT shockingly original and fascinating a story- but like... #i just don't know many ongoing fun series with interesting lovable characters where there are also major representations #for disability race queerness etc. #esp if tetia is trans. shirahama-sensei you can tell me... #MOSTLY IM LOSING MY MIND AT WHERE THE SERIES IS GOING LIKE I AM SCARED. my theories are dark and i fear for qifrey SOMEONE HELP HIMMM.. #ONCE AGAIN LET SOMEONE HLEP YOU YOU QUESTIONABLE AND TRAGIC GAY LITTLE SKIRT MAN #i hate that i had to just let my fic be so short. I CANT WRITE ANY MORE RIGHT NOW...i would have to make up so much plot stuff #bc orufrey CANNT happen they cant freaking KISS until so much is sorted out between them which requires the plot moving forward and.. #AUGHHH !!!! sensei please just tell me what happens please please please please please please please please please #the next chapter looks hella plot-ful but STILL..it's going to take YEARS..i just want to know if qifrey IS GOING TO SURVIVE THIS SHIT !!!! #if the brimhats [redacted] then he'll [redacted] and THEN WHAT IF [redacted] has to [redacted] I FEEL LIKE SENSEI'LL DO THAT !!! SCARED #SURELLLY she'll have [redacted] have to [redacted] but i dont think shed go as far as [redacted] ?????? #i plan to go to japan next year if possible anyway but what if it's too early for an anime-fuelled merch section in animate. please #this is like the first new and non-zuka thing i've been hyperfixated on for years. i need official qifrey and oru items. I need the items #once again i feel weird putting my personal feelings and theories on the internet to an audience of nobody but once again we will die. #am i going to be on my deathbed thinking 'oh i shouldn't have happily gone off about witch hat on tumblr that time how embarrassing' no. #do you know how worthwhile it is to enjoy something. and to basically avoid other fanworks for the most part so you're just surrounded #by your own pure and enjoyable feelings. #i actually went to a local queer art place yesterday and like. man i was very different to them but #there are people somewhat like me out there huh. somewhere. i'm going to make zines and art and express my world. even if just a bit. #literally why would you priv reblog something like this i think there is something wrong with you? i feel better about myself now #i will find the ones like me not the ones like you <3

[anarkhebringer]

Day infinity of my mother reinforcing why I have a personality disorder.

#negative #TLDR she lost her shit at me for daring to rightfully assume she's accusing me of things when that's her default #she ALWAYS does it even in the most menial conversations she's always like ''don't get offended BUT'' with the dumbest shit #and then when I interrupted her as soon as she started and left she accused me of ''running when we have heated debates'' #and then proceeded to scream about it to herself for like 5 minutes #if she weren't the sole controller of the money and it wouldn't ruin us financially if she died right now... I shan't say it #3 of her 4 kids have wanted her dead as we grew up and 2 of the 4 still hold to that desire #and it's because 1 of them fucked off to Kansas and cut all contact and realized she missed bumming things off my mother #my older brother and I are so sick of her but we can't leave #like when she was dying of sepsis a few years ago I was the only one to do anything and it was only when I walked by the room #my older brother just closed the door on her and was gonna let her die in there #she took herself to the ER that day and died #but they brought her back #she deserves it she truly does she's ruined our lives in new and creative ways as we've grown up and we can't do a thing about it #since we're all disabled and rely on her as our carer in a state that regularly murders disabled people in the inpatient care facilities #so my older brother and I are doing our best to not kill her ourselves by making her as miserable as possible in return for her ''love''

[saki-chan16]

2023 started with my boyfriend asking to watch Fruba and .... he LOVES it!! 🤩

Can't wait for the emotional turmoil to set in once he realizes how much of a doozy this show is 🥴 mwahahahahaha 💕

#fruba #fruits basket #tohru honda #starting the new year off right #first time watching #lets see how he handles it 👀

[non-un-topo]

The cis male ability to mansplain a subject I myself brought up astounds me. Like I actually want to study them under a microscope. My guy, I brought it up. Why are you explaining it back to me?

#anyway went to dinner with my partner's fam. actually had a good time but their father is still their father. #the waiter did his best not to even acknowledge my existence. talked to my partner's dad exclusively even though there were five of us. #he also retold the story of agamemnon (something to do w the wine we picked) and i perked up like !!!!! yes i've read it!!! #i kept coming in like yeah that's right!! but the man did not even look at me once. he was even standing so he was turned away from me. #but to explain the mansplain thing sdfghfdss.... i mentioned i was reading the name of the rose #and FIL bulldozed anything i was going to say about it and started explaining it to me as if i'd never read it? or heard of umberto eco? #my guy i literally just brought it up. #i've been noticing this shit happening a lot more lately. got serious woman-in-her-20s syndrome. #i'm simultaneously a 15 year old girl and a ghost. whoa the tiny little woman has heard of this extremely famous greek tragedy?? noooo #oh my god and she likes to read?? and she likes history too?? no she doesn't she's wrong let me explain her own interest to her. #sometimes i sit there and i honestly want to scream. like would you like to know what i know??? for once?? because i actually know things. #anyway i know exactly why cis men do this i know all the cogs. and i have no patience for it. #in good news my partner and i managed to steal a few moments alone at a book store and i bought a few history books #whose subjects would absolutely pop my sexist FIL's mind like a grape. i'm fucking pissed off. okay. i'm good i'm done.

[devilfruitdyke]

interacting with my mom when shes drunk is like being stabbed to death with a paperclip

#not even. i think its worse #victim of the self harm to weird masochism tendency pipeline here. its like being stabbed with a paperclip once #and then no other stimulation for the next 5 hours #anyway she keeps making EVERY FUCKING THING about how its so hard to be white in todays society #ok girl :) ill make sure yr nursing home doesnt have any brown pwople in it good to know #today we were at a shopping center in the middle of the day because me and mj were checked out from school for something #lets play a fun guessing game. did my mom a) get food and drive out like a normal human being #b) get pissed off because they didnt get her order right. or c) bitch about how theres too many nonwhite people shopping during the day #if you guessed c after asking yrself 'wait what the fuck lmfao' congratulations! you win a fraction of the pain im feeling #'they dont have jobs 😡😡' ok! religiously i cant tell you to kill yrself but i think you should take some time away from society #i was filling out a form to try to get hired at this place soon #i started counting how many times she was mad that it was hard for me and soooo easy for illegal immigrants. it was 5 btw #'this must be wjy i go to any place in the 3 towns near us and no one speaks english 😡😡' #< poor baby had a spanish speaking cashier at wingstop a week ago ☹️🥱 #ALSO ITS FUCKING TEXAS. YEAH THERES SPANISH SPEAKERS.. #ITS NOT EVEN THAT the person shes thinking of also spoke english just seemed mad at her #it takes concentration to speak a language that isnt yr own! could you imagine if anyone else had this attitude #i walk into my 3rd year of asl class and the teacher is like USE BETTER FACIAL EXPRESSION. #can you even SPEAK asl what has this country COME TO. like im not speaking a new langauge with a slightly bad attitude #anyway. not necessarily praying on her downfall but praying on my ascendance #ill get a good offer from a college 500 miles away. minimum

[why-animals-do-the-thing]

There's a viral video circulating from the Fort Worth Zoo, of two keepers who ended up in a habitat at the same time as a silverback gorilla. Spoiler for good news: neither the humans nor the gorilla got hurt. It's a bad situation that ended extremely well, and that's why I want to talk about it.

The audio for this video is mostly someone praying loudly, so if you need to turn the audio off to watch it, you won't miss anything relevant. If you don't want to watch it, here's the summary: it starts with a keeper running around the corner into the main exhibit, pursued by a large male gorilla. She is quickly able to get into a doorway at the back of the exhibit, but does not completely close the door because the gorilla is standing across from her, watching. He eventually moves off to the right hand side of the exhibit, where we can see a keeper is trapped in the corner at the front. She was trying to move towards the exit as he moved to the right, and she stops, standing very still behind a tree, while he stays along the far right wall. They stay like that for a minute, and then the gorilla runs to the front right corner, and the keeper is able to run to the door in the back of the exhibit and get to safety.

Let's start with basic information. Even though it's just going viral now, this video is from October of 2023. It was taken not by a guest, but by the zoo security officer responding to the situation. Hmmm, seems like he maybe should have been doing something else during that situation, instead of than taking a phone video. It's going viral now because the guy (who is no longer employed at the zoo) decided to post it on TikTok for his five minutes of fame. This guy immediately started giving all sorts of media interviews, answering questions like "why no tranquilizers" inappropriately, making memes out of his own video, generally distasteful shit.

Zoo spokesperson Avery Elander gave a public statement that "thankfully, there was no physical contact between keepers and gorilla, and all staff and animals are safe." A comment from the zoo has also indicated that the incident was due to keeper error. (As opposed to, for instance, something in the fencing breaking.) According to the guy who posted the video, a lock was left unsecured and the gorilla was able to open the door to the habitat. I don't know if I buy it, and again, this just... is probably why he doesn't have a job anymore. By sharing that detail - real or not - he places a ton of public scrutiny and blame on that keeper team. (If that's what happened, I can promise you it will have been dealt with internally.) He also was nice enough to say he wouldn't name the women in the video... but verified they're still staffers at the zoo... which means they're eminently identifiable! Excuse me while I ragequit for a second.

So there's two reasons I wanted to talk about this. The first is to make sure it is well known that this guy is purposefully and intentionally exploiting the worst day of someone's life for media attention. Their lives were in danger, and he's using it for fame. His name is in the media articles - I'm not going to share it because he doesn't deserve that attention. The second reason, though, is because this video is a masterclass on how to survive if you end up sharing space with a gorilla. Every zoo person I've spoken to or seen comment on the video is so, so impressed with how the keepers handled themselves.

The gorilla in this video is 34-year-old Elmo. All apes in AZA zoos are managed in protected contact, so keepers are supposed to be separated from them by a barrier at all times. The zookeepers were in the habitat putting out a mid-day meal when he got out. Watching the video, you can see he's not actively being aggressive towards them - he's not making threat displays or trying to approach them. Mostly, Elmo seems like he doesn't know what is going on and he's kinda freaked out about it. (This is confirmed in the zoo's press statement, too). The staff stayed calm, and importantly, watched and waited to see how he'd move and act.

The zoo did say one thing, though, that's a bit misleading. In one article, their press person I quote as saying “In general, gorillas are considered the “gentle giants” of the great ape species.” Just because this may be true in comparison to other great ape species doesn't meant gorilla aren't still incredibly dangerous. This type of messaging always worries me, because I think it leads people to misunderstand the risks of being close to megafauna. Gorilla are extremely strong animals, and their social norms/behaviors are very different from that of humans. That's why it's such a big deal any time people end up in gorilla habitats, and why sometimes in those circumstances lethal measures have to be taken to protect human life.

These keepers are incredibly lucky to be unharmed. These women stayed safe specifically because they're trained professionals who knew how to act around gorilla, they knew this particular animal well, and they'd learned the escapes from the exhibit just in case this ever happened. We should applaud them for their cool heads and quick thinking.

As for the guy who posted the video? As a colleague put it, may he always step on a Lego.

#gorilla #gorilla video #viral video #zoo animals #zoo animal welfare #fort worth zoo