#THE TRYING

[theboxfort]

Peace and love

#pink posts #i saw a tweet that was like “i see other people's art” --> i get discouraged #i understand that seeing art that is prettier than yours can be discouraging but why not twist that a bit? #why does it look prettier to you? is it the colors #is it the textures they used? the brushes? #study them and try to put your spin on it #and maybe you'll find your art beautiful as well

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

#yeehaw #1k #5k #10k #posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours? #also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that! #unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference #edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense #also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags #1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now #he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic #2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign #like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock #3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing #it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is #extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once #it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life #i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about #Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect #if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it #aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week

[cemeterything]

it's such a bummer that losing control of your emotions only makes the entire situation worse in really embarrassing personal ways. losing control of my emotions should give me pyrokinesis.

#🐉 #guess who just had another goddamn breakdown #caused by trying not to have a breakdown and failing no less

[omegasmileyface]

realizing that sticking to the "do it bad" "do it scared" mentality implies theres also a "do it bored"

#cartoon blood #guy whos on 2 adhd meds and an antidepressant trying to function any executive at all ever:

[not-quitenormal]

Rage. In my heart. All-consuming. FUCK AI.

#i can't even function i am so fucking livid right now #they didn't even TRY to match the pattern!!!! #congrats!! you fucked it up!!! now burn your computer!!!!!

[fattylime]

a study i did because i realized idk how to draw environments at all LMAO

a few people have asked, so this is a now a print <3

#was gonna fill the space a lot more #but i got laaazy #i was fighting trying to make that brush in perspective #anyways impressionism is my friend #illustration #fattylime #digital art #digital illustration #art study #lime made art

[nighthawkes]

I must sleep. Sleep is the mind-healer. Sleep is the big-life that brings total ability to fucking do anything. I will face my bed. I will permit the blankie to pass over me and snores to pass through me. And when sleep has gone past I will turn the outer eye to greet the new morning. When the sleep has gone there will be everything. Energy and will to live will remain.

#having a come to Jesus with myself about trying to work late #sleep is the only path to productivity. rest is the only thing that lets me get things done. #litany against not laying down

[captainjonnitkessler]

Sometimes I wish we would start calling out the performative radicalism on this site for the poser bullshit it is. "Remember, it's always morally correct to kill a cop!" "Don't forget to firebomb your local government office!" "Wow, it sure would be a shame if these instructions on how to make a molotov cocktail got spread around!"

Okay. But you're not killing cops or firebombing government offices. You are posting on a dying microblogging website to a carefully-curated echo chamber that has radicalized itself into thinking that taking the absolute most extreme position on any subject is praxis but that anyone discussing the most practical way to effect actual change is your sworn enemy. You do not have the street cred OR the activist cred to be talking about killing cops, babe.

#thinking about the person i saw saying that if you're at a protest #and other protesters try to stop you from becoming violent you should just kill them bc 'peace police are still police' #even taken as hyperbole that's simply dumb as shit on every conceivable level #it's also pretty blatantly hypocritical coming from people who are usually self-avowed prison/death penalty abolitionists #like i'm sorry but you don't get to be a death penalty abolitionist and also call for the death of your political enemies online #this isn't a major issue or anything i'm just bored and annoyed

[beaft]

can anyone tell me why i enter the grocery store a normal person and emerge as some sort of vile ravening monster

#was trying to leave the self-checkout and someone was standing in front of the exit gate looking at their phone and blocking the whole lane #the malignant influence of the grocery store transformed this from a minor inconvenience to a cardinal crime #i was ready to leap at them like a coyote and tear them to shreds #be shh now

[sleepygaymerdisease]

#'who was this about' dont worry <3 #EDIT hi i didnt realize this would get notes LOL. um everyone reblog with what character ur thinking of because im NOSEY i WANNA SEE #edit 2 to everyone trying to guess what the character i made this for was. youre all wrong. this was about kamen rider #youd think lupin because of my profile picture but alas i have other interests as well... #anis gaymer moments

[normal-thoughts-official]

Please stop seeing politics as an identity and start seeing it as a collective means for change

#i am so tired of ppl trying to use 'theres no ethical consumption under capitalism' in regards to BDS #it's not about ethics it's about participating in a political strategy palestinians have spent YEARS promoting as a means for change #some things are in fact not about you #social justice #I/P #social issues #palestine #gaza #free palestine #free gaza #id in alt #overflowing trashcan

[trans-cuchulainn]

i do think there is a degree to which certain kinds of Instagram activists have convinced themselves that traumatising themselves in solidarity is a useful form of activism. "I'm having nightmares and crying so much I want to be sick because of all these videos of dying children but I can't look away while people are getting hurt" I mean don't you think you'd be able to help more if you weren't having nightmares and crying all the time?? don't you think this is a one-way trip to burnout? don't you think maybe increasing the amount of trauma going around is counterproductive? I dunno bro there's something to be said for bearing witness but there comes a point where you gotta look hard at yourself and go "am I helping, or am I just making myself suffer so I don't feel guilty for not suffering while somebody else is experiencing bad shit"

#and they try to drag other people down with them #BUDDY I AM NOT USEFUL IF I'M HAVING A PANIC ATTACK #vicarious trauma is not like. a useful form of solidarity. in my opinion #personal

[bumblebeebats]

"Don't just throw ripped jeans away, you can repair them using these 10 cute Visible Mending techniques!!" unfortunately my friend the first point of failure for every single pair of jeans i have owned in my life has been the Crotch and Ass. Knees: fine, cuffs: fine; but 3 years in, and all that stands between the world and my astronaut-patterned taint is 0.5µm of denim worn so thin that every squat threatens to tear it to shreds like wet toilet paper. If the Tiktok craft community could figure out a way to resurrect jeans afflicted in such a way that doesn't involve adding a whole ass buttpatch like some sort of inverse assless chaps situation then that'd be great

#and yes i have indeed experimented with trying to add invisible patches on the INSIDE of the jean but unfortunately #trying to sew anything to the non-euclidean hellscape that is the crotch area of a pair of pants #inevitably ends up 1. (hand-sewing) puckered as hell or 2. (machine sewing) w me accidentally sewing a leg hole closed 😔

[ackee]

to all my mutuals and friends. im so sorry

#THIS IS JUST WHERE IM AT RN. TRYING SO HARD #txt

[atissi]

i don't really like when people say dungeon meshi is accidentally good autistic representation, because while i understand not wanting to make conclusions without explicit confirmation from the author, there's always the weird assumption that non-western authors somehow don't know about things like neurodivergency/queerness/etc. (on top of the assumptions that east asian authors are somehow more naive or oblivious to "western" social issues).

given that dungeon meshi started being published in 2014, it's not really a "work belonging to its times"—it's as contemporary as any other media we discuss on this site, which means it should be fair to assume it engages with contemporary topics (and at the very least, you shouldn't say that the representation is accidental with so much confidence)

but anyways, the chapter "perfect communication" in ryoko kui's "terrarium in a drawer" is some of the most straightforward autistic representation I've seen, and from now on I'm going to assume that laios's character writing is absolutely intentional in that regard:

#beepbeep.txt #dungeon meshi #ryoko kui #this is me trying to explain h/ollow knight lore #also yayyyy reading new things. chapter 18 'spring' is basically UFUT if you squint (sorry for the jumpscare if you know UFUT) #but the last two pages were such a surprising gut punch....it's hard not to see it as a metaphor for both the experience of raising childre #and of taking care of your parents in old age....aughh....

[blorbopolis]

im cooking

#bg3 #gale of waterdeep #astarion #karlach #shadowheart #lae'zel #wyll #halsin #not art #didn't try to fit jaheira or minsc in there. or withers #or minthara #haven't played with minthara yet so idk her. but. got the rest of the polycule pretty good i think