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justrandomselfships · 3 years

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Little steps- my self insert Fic (S/I POV) with a bunch of silly illustrations! Oh did I mention that this involves Kaeya? Well he's the main focus here even though Lisa is mentioned shit ton of times! Might write something for her focus too someday.

I finished it ages ago but I was afraid to post it- I'm not anymore and also✨ it's my birthday ✨

Ever since I joined the knights I decided to write in a diary, it helped me keep track of time. Lisa told me that it can help me in various ways, like for example remembering names of the other knights, or checking my personal progress. Now that I think about it, it was long since I checked my old entries. Nothing interesting happened today anyway so I might as well read some. I don't really remember anything that was going on when I started so I suppose I could refresh my memory.

Today Lisa wanted to introduce me to someone- she probably wanted to help me by looking for training partner for me, however I had to refuse. You probably remember why was that, I got scared of meeting someone new again. I couldn't get that mess on her shoulders when she has so much to do as it is! And there was no way I'd meet them alone it'd be too akward for both of us!

I remember the exact moment I tried to come up with an excuse for future me... It kinda made me giggle how stupid I am sometimes, but let's look at something else...

I've never felt as lonely as I do now, I don’t even know why. I don’t miss anyone nor I ever craved any interactions... But to make that feeling go away I thought about talking to Amber but when I left the house she was talking to Noelle and I got scared to approach them... Instead I decided to sketch something and stay inside for the rest of the day.

I immediately looked at my sketchbook, I don't even have to look inside, I was drawing what's outside my window like always. Maybe I'll find some better memory if I keep looking?

During my patrol I got a bit lost... It was scary... But I wasn't alone, an Adventurer found me... However he got lost too. It was a bit unlucky day since I picked the wrong maps, we also got attacked a few times by monsters. I kinda feel bad for him since he tried his best to cheer me up but I stayed silent. It should've been other way around a knight shouldn't le

Bennett! How could I forget his name when I was writing this? He was such a sweetheart I obviously had to mess it up and make him feel uncomfortable... But I did make up for it! Maybe I'll finally read something positive? I somehow can't remember how exactly that went... Or if I was daydreaming about apologizing?

I decided to bake something for Bennett as thank you and apology for acting so cold towards him. But I had no idea on how to find him... Or what to say... So after thinking for few minutes I decided to talk to Katherine and ask her to give it to him. After "talking" to her I locked myself in my room out of embarrassment, I messed up again. I just said "Bennett" placed my pastries and left. Now I probably won't be able to face her for at LEAST two months.

I cringe at the memory... Gosh now this will keep me up at night for sure... I finally forgot about it and now it'll haunt me.

Wait a second... Did I really not made any progress at all!? I was trying so hard to socialize with others and get out more but I seem to still not be able to do it right. No, it's impossible. I'm good friends with Lisa! So I definitely made any progress... Or is she just so easy to talk to? Time to take a final look at something recent for a change...

Capitan Kaeya Alberich wanted to talk to me outside work... It might not sound like a big deal but somehow I just froze... I wasn't able to respond properly and he probably guessed what I was going to say, not that he ever can't do that... I might be too predictable. Either way I feel bad, my behavior was really disrespectful and I knew better than that to just ignore someone like him. I still have much to learn and I'll need to properly apologize for staying silent.

I only ever failed... There is no mistaking it. Great way to note down progress huh? Too bad there is none.

Think, what do I need to do to finally do better? I am the problem for sure but what do I really need to change? Maybe I should just start observing how others act... After all I never bothered to do that. It might help in one way or another...

Obviously there's only one place where there is a lot of people and I won't look like a total creep if I'll just listen in the conversations and look at random people... It's no other than the tavern. I'm scared to go there alone... But I don't have to!

Lisa would be willing to go right?... Then again I rely on her a bit too much and going out like this could be an opportunity to break the ice with someone else...

Jean is always busy, Amber will be way too distracting and we might end up somewhere else, Eula is too scary, Venti... I don't even know why I'm considering him.

Maybe that offer from capitan Kaeya still stands? It's from bearly 2 weeks ago so maybe if I get lucky and he happens to still be interested, I can actually go...

What am I even thinking!? I didn't even apologize for the last time... But being around so many drunk people is terrifying... However I can't bet on the fact that he won't drink too much... On the other hand he seems to handle people and I'll definitely learn something.

Screw it. It might be scary but I need to do it. Tomorrow I'll ask him! That's for sure! He's the most respectable and trustworthy person who isn't always busy and will not distract me.

~⏳

I'm scared to do it but I have to! I need to... Did I really say that I'm gonna do it today? Or should I just pretend that I never thought of it. He's probably busy today. Yup definitely that no need to feel stressed.

I haven't seen him back at the headquarters nor did I see him around town when I was coming back from my patrol- that's a good sign. It's still pretty early but I don't think that I'll see him today... What a relief!

Before I left the headquarters after finishing some paperwork I hear a voice that belongs to a beautiful librarian I am lucky to be able to call a friend.

"Hey there cutie, are you okay?"

"Just a little bit nervous that's all, nothing new haha"

"Do you need me to pass a message again?"

"No need! It's something I need to say myself..."

"I see..."

"But if you happen to see capitan Kaeya it would be nice if you could tell him that I was looking for him" out of habit I grab my hair and begin to play with it. Lisa's warm soothing voice blessed my ears as she said "No worries darling, I'll let him know" before she left and giggled to herself...

Wait... Oh no.

Why did I say anything!? Is she that magical that I can't say anything but what's on my mind.

If she happens to meet him my request will be unavoidable! Even if I tried thinking of something else Kaeya will know that I'm lying. I can't avoid him either... Can't waste his precious time...

How do I even ask him!? Do I need to change from my work clothes before I go? What should I do...

I didn't realize that I started walking in circles before someone approached me.

"Heather?"

I turn around and see the man I was thinking about all day. Dammit... I have to say it. I can't think of an excuse and staying silent is now unacceptable.

"Oh-uhm... Greetings Capitan Kaeya"

"Lisa informed me that you were looking for me"

"Oh right!... That... Haha..."

"I don't want to rush you, however I do have some business to attend to"

"I'm so sorry! I mean- since you're busy then my silly request is irrelevant"

"Come now, I believe that I should be the judge of that" his smug look made it ever so slightly more challenging to say anything.

"I just... Ugh..." I took a deep breath "Look as you know I was trying to loosen up recently and well I realized that I wasn't making any progress at all. So I remembered that one time you asked me to go to the tavern with you and I refused... I mean ignored you, which I am VERY sorry about but now I think that it was a mistake and today I wanted to ask you to accompany me but since you're busy let's just forget about everything" I felt relieved getting that off my chest.

"I don't think that will do, in fact I was heading towards the tavern so if you really want to I suppose you can join me" Oh right... I forgot about him gathering some information there from time to time. So it might work after all! He won't pay too much attention to me and I could investigate without tons of distractions.

"Let's get going then capitan" I say before he smiles softly in response "Wait do you want to get going now or-"

"Yes" he cut me off, which was fair and I'm glad he did it before I said something dumb.

We're almost there. Before we get closer I suddenly stop.

"That reminds me!" I realized I spoke out loud, as he looked at my direction my confidence dropped dead "I've never actually tried any alcohol so would you be so kind to recommend something for me? I figured that since I'm already getting out of my comfort zone might as well try something new" I said under my breath but he definitely understood what I meant judging by his facial expression and well... response.

"Absolutely" my heart skipped a beat. I desperately tried to start a conversation topic... But choosing alcohol might be something I'll regret...

Kaeya started listing few drinks I could enjoy his words were poetic as he described the beverages, however the names of the drinks went over my head. It wasn't that bad but I just felt stupid over how clueless I was. He definitely knew what he was talking about and I'm more than interested in hearing more. The more he talks the less likely I am to say something I'll regret.

"Obviously since I don't know how much you can handle I won't be forcing you to try too much too soon" he paused "Your father probably wouldn't be happy either if you returned drunk" he said teasingly. It invited me to respond less seriously.

"Oh no! This means that we'll have to do it again, how awful"

"We didn't enter yet so you can feel free to leave now before you regret spending time with me of all people" his voice was now suddenly much more hostile... Did I mess it up!?

He laughed softly "I'm sorry did I go too far? While I don't want to force you to do anything, I won't lie... I'm a bit curious to learn something new about you tonight"

We were still outside standing right in front of the entrance to the tavern if not for chatting we could hear from the inside there would be total silence.

"I'm sorry for being quiet again! It's just that you caught me off guard haha" I look away "There isn't much to know about me so I feel like I'll only disappoint you"

"I'm not so sure about that part"

"Wait... Did my father tell you anything about me!?"

"Look let's just get inside, We'll discuss it later"

Nervously I followed him yet again. The atmosphere was warm and I could see different kinds of people all over the place. We sit down.

"So did he tell you anything?" I ask immediately.

"Relax, he didn't" he seemed amused by my desperation to know. It's understandable... And I'm probably overreacting anyway. I collect my thoughts "I'm sorry"

"What are you sorry for?"

"I'm just making this into some big deal for no reason. Maybe the reason is the huge amount of respect I have for you that makes me freak out"

"I see, well I don't see the reason to be so formal now. We aren't working after all" his soft smile was enough for me to calm down.

"Thank you" Maybe it was all I needed to hear, after that everything went smoothly.

I start feeling proud of myself... Maybe I can change after all? Either way it only shows that I have to write it down! And once I was back home I did just that.

Today I had enough courage to take a step in right direction! I went to a tavern with capitan Kaeya. It was fun and for the first time in years I wasn't that scared. It wasn't totally perfect but it was definitely worth it.

#❄️ frozen in tide 🌊#selfship #self insert #oc x cannon #self ship #my self insert #self shipping #my f/o #kinda self ship related #my self ship #kaeya x oc

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doodlydoki · 4 years

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#1 My love for my world

Present Mic x Reader

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Summary: Hizashi and the reader are invited to a talkshow, behind the scenes the reader expresses her concern for the unwanted media attention she's getting and Hizashi comforts her.

Genre: Fluff

Words: 1200~

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The small talk show microphone gets attached to your blouse as you fidgeted with your fingers nervously. You never expected to be interviewed live on one of the most famous talk shows there is, normally known for interviewing heroes exclusively. The staff already gave you and your boyfriend a heads up, fifteen minutes tops, before the two of you were expected on stage. You could already hear the crowd, cheering and laughing behind the curtain for their current guest hero. If only that enthusiasm could be for you, but you already know what to expect when you enter the scene.

You turn your heel to look at your boyfriend. As you expected, he was already hooked up to the audio system of the studio, and happily tapping his feet while he waits for you to be ready, smiling broadly and fully prepared to and ready to hit the stage with his usual enthusiasm. Why wouldn’t the man be excited? The crowd loves him, his fans love him, but you?

“Hey Babe! It’s almost time, aren’t you excited?” He asked while hopping over and holding your hands. You gave him a small smile back as you replied, “I mean, I guess I am.”

“Babe?” he immediately looks concerned, letting one hand stray from your fingers as he places it on your face, rubbing your cheek lightly with his hand. “What’s going on? Why are you upset?” He only let’s a second slip by, not giving you the time to respond as he adds a quick, “and don’t tell me you’re not upset because i know when you are and it's clear that time is now….so tell me sweetie, what’s on your mind?”

You hesitate as before you answer, “It’s just, the fans love you so much and I know they want you to have the best there is out there...Including the best girlfriend…”

“Sweetie, what do you mean?”

“I’ve seen it, ‘Zashi. The comments online about me, how some fans say that i’m never gonna be good enough for you, that they think you deserve someone who's prettier, who’s maybe a model or an actress, who understands you better then i do, who can work with you and make you feel proud of having a big name beside you. Someone who’s important. Some of your fans think that because i’m not pretty nor famous, i will only get in your way, that i only use you to get my 5 minutes of fame.” You wipe the tears away that have started rolling down your cheeks, only for a hand to aid you, wiping them for you and a soft kiss is placed upon them.

You hear Hizashi whisper as he holds your face in his hands. “You know what i heard sweetie? I heard that my fans find you really pretty and that they are happy I found such a loyal and patient girl to stand beside me. To wait for me till late to greet me with cuddles and kisses, to congratulate me with every victory in my career, to support me from the shadows as my number one fan and to make me the happiest man there is to live.” A soft smile paints his lips as he places a kiss on your nose, making you giggle through tears. “Aw, babe please stop crying.”

“These are happy tears.” You say as you smile widely through them. “Thank you.”

“You know what babe,” He grins as he hops around, exclaiming loudly; “you just gave me enough reason to proclaim my love for you to the world!” He looks at you again walking over to you again with a smile on his face as he leans close to your ear, whispering; “I love you.”

“Why did you whisper?” You ask him confusedly.

He kisses you on the forehead, before placing a few strands of hair behind your ear. “Because you are my world.”

You turn red as you bury your face in his shirt, the man only hearing some mumbeling from your hiding spot. He smirks as he looks down at you, mischievously saying. “Sorry, what was that?”

You look up at him with red dusting your cheeks, a slight pout on your face as you repeat what you said. “I said cheeky bastard.” he chuckles picking you up in his arms and twirling you in the air before setting you back down and pulling you in a loving kiss.

“I love you, you sap.” you say smiling.

“I love you too, dear.”

You two hug and wait for a few minutes before a crew member leads you two to the spot where you have to enter the stage. Hizashi holds your hand as he moves the curtain and the two of you enter the stage together.

It has only been a few hours after the interview, you comfortably watching TV on the couch before your boyfriend's yelling draws your attention. "Babe!!! Have you seen the news?!" Hizashi comes storming out of his study and places the laptop on your lap, a video link already open, showing the talkshow's backstage scene with the two of you at the center. The video was called "Backstage leaks of talkshow 'hero talk'. Present Mic and his girlfriend behind the scenes.".

You've barely finished reading the title when your boyfriend plays the video exactly showing everything the two of you said, voice clear as daylight, probably because the microphone audio was used. Then he starts scrolling down to the likes and comments."Look at this! It already has 1.24 million views in the last 2 hours with more than 300 thousand thumbs up! And the comments are so positive babe, look!" He starts scrolling further down and then you see it too.

Cupcake_pinguin

-OMG I told you guys the two are so cute together! And when he placed her hair behind her ear and told her she's his world omg he's so hot and sweet!!! <3

Mr.no_can_do

-When she was crying and Present Mic was like please stop crying and she said these are happy tears, you gotta admit the girlfriend is kinda cute

Nr.1MicStan

-Him reassuring her and telling her he's so happy with her is so wholesome and it's so sweet to know she cares so much about him and supports him <3 also him declaring she's his world has me dead that was so adorable~

Hizashi places his hands on your shoulders and kisses the top of your head before resting his chin there, "You see? The fans love you and there are a lot of them who support us. You don't have to worry about it anymore, while there will always be people who will not approve of our relationship, there's only two things that matter." He stops resting on your head so you look up, only to see him looking down at you with a smile: "That I love you and that you love me. As long as that's happening, no matter what anyone says, I will never stop showing the world how much you mean to me." He leans down and places a kiss on your lips before softly stating:

"I love you�� My number one listener."

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Hello everyone! I'm officially off hiatus after a year. I'm so sorry I didn't come back with an aizawa x reader, but I've had this story idea in my head ever since I stopped writing for a while. I hope you enjoyed this one shot I created while trying to get back into writing again.

Have a good day Buttercups!

~Doki 💙

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arrow-romantic · 4 years

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The Middle

Chapter 1/?: First Day of My Life

Content and/or warnings: Anixety, negative thoughts, light flirting, break ups, canon ships implied. Linda/W@lly. AU.

Timeline is odd but semi explains itself. Autistic main character, gay characters.

Characters: Earth 1 H-unter Z0lomon, Fr3ddie Park[me], L!inda P.ark, Ir.is W.est, C.aitlin Sn0w, Jimmy Ol.sen[mentioned], brief v.ibe content.

Summary: Freddie wasn't expecting to drop coffee on a stranger that day, but he did and everything changed.

Words: 1,400

“Yours is the first face that I saw; I think I was blind before I met you. I don't know where I am, I don't know where I've been but I know where I want to go”First Day of My Life; Bright Eyes

When Freddie’s alarm went off at at 6:30 he realised that he’d not slept yet. He had promised himself that he would go to bed in a few minutes that was at midnight. He rushed up out of bed to shower before leaving his and his sister’s condo. It had taken ages but he finally convinced his parents he could move out without a hassle when he was nineteen, on the condition that he move in with her. Which had been fine, except for the first week when she forgot he was there and brought Barry to the condo and they stopped their makeout session when they saw him.

That was six years ago and honestly living in the city was expensive, so he stayed with Linda. He refused to move back home. “Are you going to work?” she asked him from where she was stress baking inte the kitchen.

He jammed his feet into his trainers, flattening the heels without a care. He hesitated, he wanted to ask why she was stress baking. He really did, but he also promised Caitlin he would help her. He bit down hard on his lip for a moment. “I’m going to help Caitlin in the lab for a few hours, but I promise I’ll come right back home!”

“I’m not your keeper,” Linda rolled her eyes and went back to baking.

Freddie was already out the door and rushing down the street to get to Jitters. He made his way in and got into the line. Hopefully he’d just missed the big morning rush by the time he got there. “Hey, Freddie!” Tracy grinned at him. “Your usual?”

“That’d be awesome, thanks Trac’. Could I also get two Flashes and a vibe?”

“Going to S.T.A.R. Labs today or does the editor have you on a coffee run again?” she asked casually as she started on the order.

“S.T.A.R. Labs, and I’m late.” he chagrined. His cover story was that he took photos for Iris’s articles about S.T.A.R. Labs’ contributions to the city and to the scientific world. Neither she, nor his bass was aware that he was a vigilante.

Tracey laughed. “Dr. Snow is not gonna be pleased …”

“Yeah,” he laughed softly. When she gave him his coffee he rushed out, unfortunately backing into a rather tall man. In the process he knocked the man’s coffee into his tan jacket.

“Oh FUCK. Dude I’m SO sorry!” he scrambled to balance the coffee tray into one hand so he could give the guy his napkins. “I am SO sorry. Uh, fuck. I swear I'm usually more careful. I'm so sorry. I'll fix this I-uh.”

The man stopped and watched Freddie’s fumbling for a moment, just a little awestruck. He’s cute. The man thought a bit dumbfounded. “It’s alright,” he smiled a little. “It’s not too hot.” He felt like he’d just been hit with a ton of bricks. He didn’t believe in love at first sight, but man this fumbling man, apologising for coffee … he felt something, a spark.

Freddie quickly grabbed a crumpled business card from his pocket. “Tell Tracey, the manager to put your new coffee on my tab and call me if that needs to be dry cleaned. I’m so sorry. I have to go.”

He accepted the card on autopilot. He knew for a fact that the last time he felt butterflies like this he was in his early twenties.

He was already forgetting the man’s face when he rushed into the S.T.A.R. Labs elevator and shoved on his mask. Maybe if I’m lucky she’s late too. He was not lucky, not even a tiny bit. “So nice of you to finally join us.” said Caitlin, a bit tight lipped.

“Look, I’m sorry. Last night was …”

“Whatever.” Caitlin sighed. “Alright, everyone. This is Nightfoot.”

The two kids, probably around fifteen just looked at him. “Yeah,” he mumbled. “I’m Nightfoot and I’m here to help you guys out with uh, powers and stuff.”

“...Okay.” said one of them a bit awkwardly.

“So, uh firstly I struggle with social cues, so if I ask you to clarify something I promise I’m not being condescending.” He started a little awkwardly.

There was a bit of reluctance from one of the kids. They had pressed a little; as they were not aiming to make these kids superheroes. That wasn’t the goal: the goal was to get them to a point where they felt comfortable going to school without the fear of accidentally using their powers resulting in harm to themselves or others. When the kids left however, Caitlin had stuck him into a chair and ordered him to wait for her.

He found himself getting a bit bored again as it was taking her a while to deal with things. He started to spin in his computer chair, thoroughly bored with the prospect.

“Hey, ese,” Cisco said casually. “How was the class?” he asked as he pulled off his Vibe gear.

“It went … okay. One of the kids was real worried we were gonna shove them onto the team though.” he began to explain.

“Well, do you want to go train or something?”

“I’m waiting for Caitlin.”

“Oh, I’ll leave you to it then.” Cisco headed out.

Cisco came running back into the room when he heard Cait exclaim.

“I was gone for five minutes!”

“Well, when you yell at me I get stressed and can’t come down.” Freddie shot back, currently stuck to the high wall by his hands and feet.

Cisco sighed deeply, heaving his whole body. “I’ll get the broom.” he replied and headed down the hall to grab a set of brooms. He began to work to poke his hands and feet in the hopes of encouraging his grip to slide.

That was an ordeal he never wanted to think about again. After that he went to let Caitlin draw his blood. “I still wonder what gave you such an odd assortment of powers.” Caitlin mused as she eyed one bottle of his blood. “and why it turned your hair white …”

“Yeah, we’re not any closer to answers?”

“About your powers? No. Your hair though, I think I’m getting close.” she seemed pleased with herself, and awfully interested in his biology. His combination of powers had taken them all by surprise when he initially reached out to them for help.

There was a loud beeping that filled the room. “What’s the sitch, Cait?”

“Are you ever going to stop doing that?”

“No.” He grinned.

“Hartley just took a chunk out of Emerald High School.

His phone went off then.

-----

When he finally returned home, he could tell Linda wasn't pleased with him. Which of course made dinner even more quiet and awkward for the four of them, until they started to gush about Linda's job. He was glad his parents were behaving somewhat. They were divorced and their father had a difficult relationship with them, but they managed.

By the end of the night, things were quiet. “I’m sorry,” Freddie finally said as he started to take care of the plates. “There was a thing with H.artley…” he trailed off.

“It’s always something with you,” Linda was exasperated as she nearly slammed the plates into the sink. “It’s not just H/artley. You’re always lost in your own little world! Nothing going on around you matters! You’re so self centered. If it doesn’t affect you it doesn’t matter.”

He hated that argument. He hated being told he was selfish. “You know that’s not true!” He hated that it was always selfishness somehow. There was never an understanding. “and don’t imply I don’t care about the state of our family, that is not fair and you know it.”

“I’m sorry.” Linda sighed and ran a hand through her hair. “It’s just a lot. You know dad is a handful.”

“I really didn’t mean to forget.”

“I know you didn’t. But you did.”

“and there’s nothing to do but move forward. I’m tired, I haven’t slept yet. Goodnight.”

He never went to sleep. His brain wouldn’t turn off. So he sat awake, working on photos and writing anything that came into his brain. He considered calling Jimmy, the time difference would mean they could talk for a bit but he knew that was a bad idea. He may have been mostly over their breakup but there were things his voice always dragged up.

#fall writes #book: hot shot central #YEAH I GOT A NEW FO #lmao #ss: never too late 🏳️‍🌈

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