#and she was like 'i DID thats the PROBLEM' bc now hes going crazy bc she wont dick him again shdndkfhdndn

[lobotomyladylives]

I think bpd is a bullshit stigmatizing label thrown at women to pathologize what is very obviously a response to prolonged childhood trauma and would be better labeled as C-PTSD. that being said my god I am bpd as fuck

#my sister just snapped at me bc i said i dont want to do a ton of physical labor for the job she signed me up for which apparently does i #in fact involve a lot of it. and her being mad for even that moment sent me spiraling so badly & i had the reaction i often do where #i start hating both her & myself terribly & want to isolate forever #i think she hates her new job & is taking it out on me but it doesnt matter bc i cant handle being yelled at #and the fact thst it took me till adulthood to realize thats bc i associate it with my father is crazy. yeah its just the cptsd like #everything else. and whats nutso is how i continue to think my trauma Wasnt Bad Enough for ptsd . #just bc he didnt beat the shit out of or molest me i feel like i dont even have a right to be this fucked up #not that it was only him. being bullied at school really did not help. i guess now that i think about it the problem is that until #i was a teenager i literally did not feel emotionally secure anywhere. home or school. always the ticking of a bomb in the bg #the inevitable moment my dad blew up over nothing or i overheard my peers talking about what a freak i was #i dont know why it still hurts to think about. im so far removed from it my life now couldnt be more different #well thats the stupid fucking thing about childhood isnt it. those are your very first experiences with the world & other ppl #i do know my view of romantic relationships was irrevocably poisoned by my parents & that is never going to be undone. so cool

[banamine-bananime]

AITA for trying to save my friend and keep the rest of my asshole friends safe from their bad decisions?

I (M26) just went through this real shitty breakup. So basically, my ex C (M lmao man fuck if i know his age idek if knows it. or has one i guess) has this god-fucking-awful habit of deciding to solve every problem by dying about it and/or fucking off without so much as a word to the people unfortunate enough to give a shit about him, except maybe his sister (unhelpful for the rest of us because she also inherited the "fucking off without a word" gene. man fuck this whole family for making me care about them. whatever). Also, killing himself inside peoples brains thats like a whole hobby for him. like okay either ghost us OR kill yourself in front of us altering the trajectory of our lives forever PICK ONE like a NORMAL person.

Okay wait im not explaining this well. So years ago C and W (M37 now) were partners but C was, uh, in a really bad place mentally (S is telling me this is more diplomatic to say than "crazy af") and that situationship ended as badly as a situationship can end. I mean W's told me he pretty much had his sense of identity as someone separate from C totally destroyed by that for a while, which like, in hindsight its kinda an accidental dick move that our team made him take C's legal identity, but in our defense a) the fuck were we supposed to know?, b) tbf he really did need it not to go back to prison, c) it's not like C was using his identity, on account of the fucking off and effectively-dying-as-a-solution habits, and d) i mean. i gotta admit it's also pretty funny in a really fucked way.

aw shit derailed on a tangent again

recently its just like, we just get so focused on one thing its hard to remember anything else, you know?

S is so good at getting us back on track though. thank god because you would not believe the number of irons weve got in the fire to keep track of, its ridiculous. (i love making my partner be the planner in the relationship lol. highly recommend being a passenger princess in the body sometimes. fuck massages, i'm telling you THIS is what you need after a long day getting shit DONE and taking care of everyone else's messes)

So I met C 6 years ago, right out of basic, when we were privates stationed at the same base. middle of nowhere. shit, this is gonna be hard to explain, just realized i should use different names for C to keep them straight. I knew "A" and W knew "E", i didnt meet E until years later. theyre alters and also the same guy but also not the same guy. dont worry about it if you dont get it bc ive dated both of them and i dont think i do. my life is stupid.

Bunch of bullshit happened, A ghosted (lol. you'd be high-fiving me if you knew him) and then found a problem to solve by dying. you get it by now.

Then i meet E, E encounters a problem and tries to die about it round one (i guess round two, after exploding in W <- LOL. you should be high-fiving me right now), E's sister drags him back to the land of the living, E ghosts, W and i start dating, W tries to martyr himself and disappears because i guess E rubbed off on him (dude i am on a fucking roll. you should be high-fiving me out of pity for my glamorously miserable soap-opera life if nothing else. homophobic not to), our team gets W back, E strolls back like he has no idea why im mad at him, we fight about it, makeup-makeouts about it, and E tries to die about it round two: in my brain boogaloo.

So thats how S and i meet. oops, guess i never introduced S? Feels weird to have to introduce ourself twice, people dont really meet us separately anymore LOL. S (M, ageless) is also C's alter, my partner in life and badassery and brain and body. and obviously freaky sex stuff, that goes without saying but i'm saying it anyway to brag. the swish swish to my stabbing people who really deserve it. Not really interested in your opinion on our relationship, it's not what i'm asking about. we're aware its not conventional, because we're not fucking braindead. Im so sick of all the "oooohhhhh this isn't healthy", "he's a male manipulator and youre codependent i know bc i learned psychology from tiktoks by girls with green hair", "why are you wearing your ex-boyfriend's armor colors while wearing his dead ex-boyfriend's armor while dating and sharing a brain with your dead mutual ex's alter", "have you considered going to therapy instead of a quest against death itself" blah blah blah. If youre so bored you need to judge our life then just get your own 🙄🙄🙄

we've been really on that sigma grindset the last few weeks. S has got our sleep optimized down to a tight triphasic 3.46 hours and we're minmaxing the fuck out of the rest of every day. Biohacked to shit over here. too much to do, so we have to make there be enough of our time to do it. who else is gonna? my teammates? the REDS? we're half batman half babysitter to a gaggle of idiots who can barely be trusted to wipe their own asses, let alone fight their own battles and make decisions like "wah wah wah A is dead let's just give up and cry about it or whatever".

Don't even get me started on W. Oh youre all about character-building wake up and grind self-improvement and taking leadership until we're making decisions you dont like, i guess. WHATEVER. this is why we dont listen to you.

its hard, okay. like, you cant understand the sheer fucking stress were under trying to keep all our plans going smoothly while keeping these guys safe while they're basically actively trying to unravel every carefully-laid thread and also strangle themselves in them. im probably going prematurely grey and also losing some time. its hard to remember when we need to hold back and use the kiddy gloves. i really didnt want to come to holding - uh, we'll call him MC (M25) - by the throat, passed-out. he's like a brother to me, been through thick and fucking thin together, so yeah, i feel really bad about that, my bad, we were the asshole there, but like, maybe stop throwing yourself in the way? like run out into the road you're gonna get hit by a truck no matter how hard they slam the brakes. mfw the conses quence. but im NOT asking about that. everyone's been on our dick about "please god stop doing all of this" and abandoning A and trying to break us up way before that, and THAT'S what im asking about

Anyways tl;dr are we the asshole for getting shit done when it takes methods that all our monday morning quarterback friends dont like

_____

OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:

it really was a dick move to dangle my teammate's limp body in a chokehold even though it was basically an accident and also not even directly relevant to the question

OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might not be the asshole:

okay but we're right

#red vs blue #rvb restoration #lavernius tucker

[lazaruspiss]

oh no I was totally joking for the don’t tell anyone thing but my god yes, he’s been reassured from every angle that he doesn’t count as a child, that he’s different, rules for thee and not for me type of thing, I bet he legitimately doesn’t see anything wrong with Babs kissing him and I bet Bruce wouldn’t have either (going insane thinking about 14 y/o dickie dating babs with bruce’s approval)

also that’s crazy that the age of consent is 16 in NJ, that means that even if dick ever got to a place where he could acknowledge that he was groomed and wanted to prevent it happening to others bc he’s selfless and a hero and bla bla bla (mostly he doesn’t want to focus on how it happened) it would be so hard to get her convicted for anything, brb I’m going to google the statute of limitations in new jersey

im fairly sure Babs is Bruce's partner of choice for Dick, if that time he and Babs shit talked Kori and acted like Dick was going thru a phase and would come right back to them is anything to go off of! sometimes my brain just turns into a messy collage of all the creepy shit thats been said/done to Dick lmao.

And yeah none of his rapists are ever seeing any rape charges. Liu? He was technically legal and said yes! Also she might be dead by now, i can't remember. Mirage? Do the in universe consent laws have anything for illusion based superpowers used to coerce? No clue! But regardless it would be tough to pursue without outing any secret IDs. And then there's the everything else that made the situation endlessly complicated, like wasn't there an evil robo Nightwing at some point?? Wild. And Catalina? Same problem as Mirage where it's too entangled in Nightwing for any charges to be pressed on Dick's behalf!

If you take out the secret identity elements i still don't think there would be enough for Liu or Mirage, but the thing with Cat might have something resembling a case. She did purposely get him drunk and tried to get him to sign off on a marriage certificate. There were situations that could have had witnesses who could testify to at least some degree of abusive behavior. Still probably wouldn't go anywhere, but it would have the best shot out of the three.

#asks #anon

[spacedhead]

homestuck reread #11: act 6 p2

aranea first appearance!!! shes so beautifullll hi girl

okay so i think i misremembered this specific comversation. in a previous conversation with roxy, roxy accidentally IMPLIED that jane might have feelings for him. but then jake was like yeah i already know that she has a thing for me but then since he knows roxy isnt supposed to talk about it he agrees to drop it. then here he is like hey jane do you like me? be honest. just come out and say it. do you? and she is like clearly not ready to be honest yet so shes like uh no i dont

so then hes like oh you dont well thats crazy i thought you did. but then hes like . are you sure? and she is like... haha i guess not... GAHHH THIS IS SO PAINFUL TO READ. but the problem im finding is that i feel like jake is in the wrong here but like i dont know i might do the same thing. if i suspected someone liked me and then got soft confirmation from their best friend i might also approach the situation by asking for confirmation rather than being like I KNOW YOU LIKE ME. but maybe the real thing i would do is wait for them to tell me... i honestly dont know what the right answer is... like what was his best option here because what he did felt so wrong. and jane. poor jane. she is suffering with the weight of liking this FREAK . its just hard cause i wanted her to be honest but i also get why she wasnt

i dont even want to show this next part but jake after this is telling jane about how he thinks dirk wants to date him (which he does) and jane is just. suffering . but she keeps telling him to like go for it? like why are you sabotaging yourself like this?? i get shes trying to be a good friend but like at what cost girl your sanity?? and how is he this socially unaware when he has proven that he can pick up on the hints that jane liked him even BEFORE roxy accidentally implied it?? but now he cant tell that jane is OBVIOUSLY not happy with the situation. i actually cant tell if hes being a cruel person and deliberately ignoring her feelings or if hes just suddenly unable to pick up on her feelings. i GUESS in his defense there has been this ongoing theme of his friends saying that he has a tendency to believe people at face value and believe IN people. get it. because hope. but that is dumb and in my opinion a weak defense

to be fair. he is glasses

what heaven looks like (without the dead cat)

AHHHHH JUMPSCARE

god damn you. tumut

this is really cool

me every time i get mad and my friends call me delusional

this section of dirk giving jake the Lore is cool. look at alpha dave he is so awesome

holy balls look at rose too

HELL YEAH

Sadge

DO YOU OR DO YOU NOT KNOW THAT JANE HAS A THING FOR YOU....... WHAT IS HAPPENING

hee hee look at lil seb

this baller ass panel. hes so cool he has a fucking SWORD

look at him go!!!!

AHHH I LOVE THIS PANEL EVERYONE IS SO SILLY!!!!!!

me when im the dumbest boy in paradox space

wait this makes sense to me. the seer of mind can see brain ghost dirk. that is so cool

I AM CRESTFALLEN. (also jane and roxy just died so that is very sad too. but they have dreamselves.) shit is kind of hitting the fan when all the alpha kids are trying to enter. also calliope just got name and appearance revealed so... hey

this is funny

HUHHHHH

ok so i watched s dirk synhcronize. really good flash! some things i noticed. 1. there is that tumblr post that is like dirk just high fives meenah without even knowing who she is or what a troll is. that is wrong he DOES know what a troll is and had already briefly met her like right before the high five happened . 2 its crazy that he has no fear or hesitation when he puts his own head in the transportalizer. like bro really just was willing to kill himself for his friends. i know that he lives bc of his dreamself but still to have ZERO hesitation shows how much he loves them all. 3 in the beginning of homestuck john needed a sledge hammer to open his cruxtruder and throughout the comic most of the characters have needed to drop something heavy on the lid to pop it open but dirk just fucking kicks it open with little effort . actual baller

based hal

this goofy ass scene look at roxys face its so me

fuuuuuck i just watched caliborn enter... lord english destroyed the dream bubble with the john who died and a couple dead daves... (and a bunch of alternate trolls) man i fucking HATE that guy....

shes real or somefin

dude. not cool

i fuckin love his hashtags

LOOK AT THEM

gender envy

im out of image space but ........ to be continued. this is definitely... like... i feel like after cascade the comic came to an abrupt stop. and it is taking a while for things to get going again. maybe once they arrive at the new session

#joff hs reread #sadge #the girls and the gays #hs

[kamiversee]

OK I HAVENT READ CHAPTER 50 YET BC I HAVE THIS MENTAL PROBLEM (someone lock me up) WHERE I ONLY READ FANFICS IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT BUT

basically

yk the song logical by olivia rodrigo

it’s so… reader and gojo codeeedddddf

master manipulator, god you’re so good at what you do come for me like a saviour, and i’d put myself through hell for you (the beginning, gojo needing reader to do the list)

hear all the rumours lately, that you always deny (he loves you but he shouldn’t)

and i fell for you like water falls from the february sky (she shouldn’t have fallen because he’s literally BLACKMAILING HER?????)

but now the currents stronger, i couldn’t get out if i tried (SHE NEEDS TO COMPLETE THE LIST)

but you convinced me baby, it was all in my mind (like.. he wanted her to just DO IT ✔️)

now you got me thinking that two plus two equals five and i’m the love of your life (she doesn’t understand how he could blackmail he supposedly loves)

‘cause if rain don’t pour and sun don’t shine, then changing you is possible (when the rain doesn’t pour and the sun doesn’t change, THATS when he will change. meaning he “never” will)

no, love is never logical (reader shouldn’t love him but.. yk.. she’s conflicted)

you built a giant castle with walls so high i couldn’t see the way it all unravelled and all the things you did to me (every time gojo tells her he loves her, he always says that she shouldn’t love him back) (all the things he did - THE WHOLE LIST THIS MAN IS A PSYCHOPATH)

you lied you lied you lied (about deleting stuff)

and now you got me thinking two plus two equals five and i’m the love of your life ‘cause if rain don’t pour and sun don’t shine then changing you is possible (same as before)

i guess love is never logical (“i guess” she’s more compliant now)

the sky is green the grass is red and you mean all those words you said (“all those words you said” meaning when he says “i love you” bc the reader is like… if you mean it, WHY ARE YOU FUCKING BLACKMAILING ME?!??? sorry i have pent up anger. gojo girlies for this fic go crazy)

im sure that girl is really your friend (don’t got nothing for this)

problems are all solvable (gojo wants to solve it by reader completing the list, reader wants to solve it BY NOT SLEEPING W EVERY MAN SHE SEES?!?!?!)

‘cause loving you is loving every argument you held over my head (loving him is loving everything he’s done to her)

brought up the girls you could have instead (switch girls w boys and you w i (for the reader) and it’s gojo telling her to be w choso) (CHOSO IS BETTER ???? HES POSSESSIVE BUT NOT A BLACKMAILING OBSESSIVE PSYCHOPATH HELLO????)

said i was too young i was too soft cant take a joke cant get you off (ignore this like because we know very well that the reader gets him off REAALLLL good)

oh, why do i do this? (sad bitch moment)

i look so stupid thinking two plus two equals five and i’m the love of your life ‘cause if rain don’t pour and sun don’t shine, then changing you is possible (same meaning as before)

no, love is never logical (same as before)

logical, logical, love is never logical i know i’m half responsible, and that makes me feel horrible (if she wasn’t fucking TOUCHING HERSELF THEN NONE OF THIS WOULDVE HAPPENED)

logical, logical, love is never logical i know i could’ve stopped it all, god, why didn’t i stop it all? (like she probs coulda done SUMMM abt it, she js didn’t know what)

logical, logical, love is never logical i know i’m half responsible, and that makes me feel horrible

logical, logical, love is never logical

i know i could’ve stopped it all

god, why didn’t i stop it all?

-🌊

THIS SONG FITS SO GOOD WHAT?? & TY FOR THE BREAKDOWN THRU THE LYRICS TOO

#kamiversee!answers #k!ans: 🌊

[gayspock]

goodness gracious

okay so set the scene im eating fruit and yoggy and granola with an iced coffee. just so youre aware. its 9am. i had a BIGGGG LIE IN bc i dont have work today (bank holiday) so smile

although in truth i wanted to go for my run & watch it as is tradition but it turns on the gym IS closed today booooo

tom will honestly suck the bigest dick in the room its so true

kendall being like "stewy dont hide from me" is seriously like half this website for the past few years. come out stewy. come out to see us. come on? kiss?

ROMAN HAVING AN ABSOLUTE MENTY B and just going to rot at his mams. so real for that. im sorry his MUMS. (booo)

"new jess" YOU SICK FUCK

ishould be saying more on this but im kinda jsut watching i know

do you know whats great. no matter who "comesout on top". we will always get a she-eo ceo <3

cunt i

cunt is

as

cunt does

fantastic....

its. horrfying to watch this bc i know shiv does not come out on top. of course she fucking doesnt. this isnt how it ends.

"i wanna fuck her a little bit" panning over to those sad wet bloodhound eyes of tom's

HELP

LUKAS THE FUNNIEST SEGUE

LUKAS SERIOUSLY WILL FUCK YOU BOTH I THINK . IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE

"we're going to be okay, greg" good heavens

GREG OPENING GOOGLE TRANSLARTE IS SO FUNNY

romans little grunt about that comment on his nuts. fantastic

something fucking tragic as well about tom being chosen bc lukas doesnt want a partnership, he doesnt want ideas, and shivs too full of them when

"he said them to me first" SO. BIG BROTHER.

HE DOESNT WANT IT. ROME NOT WANTING IT. so. real..........

kendall just diving into the water after going back to the pursuit kendall floating on the water kendall drowning in the water with a dead kid ken almost killing himself in the FUCKING WATER

THEIRI MPRESSIONS OF HIM AWWW

HES NOT GOING TO BE CEO I KNOW HE WONT BE BUT GOD FOR A SECOND HERE YOU COULD IMAGINE IT AS A GOOD THING EVEN WHEN IF HE UCKIN DID ITD BE HORRIBLE

NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS ITS HORRIBLE

oh god this scene is fucking . help. eyes watering emoji. sniffling sound.

PETER DONT BE SO BITCHY

OF COURSEEEE WILLA WANTS THE COW PRINT COUCH. SO REAL

SHUT UP WHY ARE THEY .. theres so many nice uufcking. i feel ill. i do feel ill . STOP IT.

DONT CUT TO FUCKING GREG RIGHT NOW THATS INSANE

tom you absolute bitch

theres something about toms timbre when he feigns surpris-

"its you" the fucking venom in her voice

IM REEEEELINGGGGGGG

EXACTLY. HE WENT FOR THE EMPTY SUIT SHIV. AND THATS THE MOST TWISTED PART OF IT. SHIV WOULD ALWAYS HAVE BEEN SEEN AS THE EMPTY SUIT AS A WOMAN BU-

OHHH M GOD HER BITCH WALK COME ON FUCKING

THE MUSIC

GOOD HEAVENS

IM HAVING GOOSE BUMPS

YOU ARE NOT CUTTING FROM SHIVS FUCKING DRAMATIC LITTLE MOMENT TO FUCKING TOMGREG IN THE BATHROOM

YOU FUCKING PRICK-

HIT

GIRLS . ladies . HEY

FIGT

FIGHT

FIGHT

FIGHT

FIGHT

FIGHT

FIGH

PUNCH HIM IN THE CUNT

CAROLINE SNAKINGGGGGG HISS GIRL HISS FOR ME

hi stewyyyyy giggle

cutting to shiv making eyhes at this exchange happening in front of her like uh huhhorrific

ROMAN

imliterally soryr fuck roman i know so earlier it was like fuck roman but ugh yeah fine hes

whatEVER

do any other LOSERS RELATER DO ANY OTHER LOSERS WHO KNEW THEY NEVER HAD A CHANCE RELATE ANY OTHER LOSERS RELATE, DOES THE "IT COULD HAVE BEEN YOU" BURN MORE THAN THE LOSS ITSELF MAYBE anyway

we need compilations of shiv power walking

the fucking parallels of fucking

OF WHEN LOGAN WAS FUCKING PRESSURRING THEM ALL IN THAT ROOM AND NOW KEN DOING IT NOW YOU BETTER BE SMELLNG YOUR ARMPIT ROMULUS VS THATS FUCKING RIGHT

hi shiv

shiv

I DONT THINK YOU WOULD BE GOOD AT TH

for fucks sake s

shiv get his ass

thats so

THIS FUCKING SHIT LIKE I MIGHT DIE KENDALL HAVE YOU CONSIDERED THAT AS THE PROBLEM KENDALL- HE KILLED SOMEONE GOOD HEAVENS

THATS NOT AN ISSUE IS ANYONE CRAZY

what is worse. killing a kid or lying about killing a kid

SHIV JUST BEING LIKE No................. I LVOE YOU B UT I CANT SOTMACH YOU IS ANYONE FUCKING

THEM HEARING THIS ALL

IM THE ELDEST BOY

IS ANYONE

YOURE NOT

CONNOR IS

holy shit

holy shit

YOU FUCKING C

GHOLY SHIT

HOLY FUCKING SHIT

HOLY FUCKING SHIT

GUYS

GUYS CAN YOU ALL BE SERIOUS

THIS IS ALWAYS HOW IT WAS GOING TO FUCKING END YOU FUCKING

I FEEL SICK IN THE HEAD

KENDALL

KENDALL WE NEED TO PRACTICE MINDFULNESS NOW

KENDALL

ME WHEN I BURN EVERYTHING ME WHEN I GIVE EVERY PIECE OF MYSELF TO MY BIRTHRIGHT WHEN IM NOT EVEN GOOOD AT IT AND MY SISTER SAYS SO OOOPSIES

WE'RE NOTHINGGGGGGGGGG

i love it when little men get angry. like ahhh! x3 so ferocious. awww. yap yap yap

EVERYONE WHO JUST FUCKING HEARD AL OF THAT IN THE FUCKING OTHER ROOM. KEN. ITS DONE.

ken dont fucking kill uyourself now

ken

we need to be normal right now

TOM ON TOP IS PERHAPS THE MOST NANUSEATIGNG. MY GOD.....

WHY ARE WE GETTING KRANK KONTENT

WHERES KAROLINA. HEAVENS.

GREG BARELY GETTING A FUCKING HANDSHAKE

THEYRE DEAD. KRANK ARE DEAD. OLD CUNTS.

you fucked it man you fucked it man you fucking piece of shit help-H WHY DID YOU JUST FUCKING STIKC TH

OH I FEEL A LITTLE UNWELL . CAN YOU TWO CUT IT OUT FOR 10 FUCKING SECONDS.

OH GOD ITS ENDING NOW ISNT IT

OH GOD

this shit reeks

kendall

KENDALL

GET AWAY FROM THE FUCKING WATER KENDALL

DONT KENDALL YOURSELF YOURE SO SEXY

does anyone else feel fucking unwell i think im gonna sob

#Egg.txt #succession liveblog

[wanderrlust0]

today was fun and we had more fun than we thought we would at this party since we werent even sure if we would go or not

edit: 11.16 / i just knew the two coworkers and my managers at the party and then just stuck with snow the whole time ofc. we got deadlifted by the girls girlfriends sister lol and she was in a whole leather/latex one piece like okayy girl youre strong. there was someone as ice king or technically simon and they were very friendly and fun. we took lemon drop shots and jello shots and i had some mixed drinks and i was sooo reddd lolol luckily it was dark but in the bathroom it was so noticeable. idk if it was but it couldve been the most ive had to drink ever or at least the most different types of alcohol ive had at once and my head started to hurt at the end but thankfully i didnt throw up!! we had a fun time tho. we got there at like 9:30ish and left around 12 or so? and sat in the car for a bit but snow got along just fine with everyone after a little while of being there and them and V talked a lot. Z asked us if we were together and were like lolol noo and he asked how we met and we mutually refused to answer & made up some nonsense so i told him to just guess even tho he would have no clue bc he doesnt know me like that and this is the most he’s heard me talk lmao. one guess was a one night hook up im like …nooo lol we never thought this would ever come up. anyways, i found out days after the party that my coworker who thru it thought me and snow were together bc she mentioned us to my boss and he knows the whole story so he told her that we werent (idk what else he told her tho since i wasnt there) but she apparently thought we gave those vibes and just looked like it and when he told me that i was like omg .. like even ice king/simon person asked us and we just mettt. i mean they were pretty gay and first asked us if we were queer bc he could tell and that was the first time someone told me that to my face so i kind of felt good?about that. like yess i wanna look queer and just not straight lolll. so i followed my coworker on ig and i see pics of her gf and i know her!! her and my bf were friends once and like were closeclose where they did stuff (this was like 5 or 6yrs ago, before i met him) and she ended up realizing she was gay or something after him and they stopped talking (mainly bc she apparently would trauma dump on him a lot). i only know about her bc years later she hit him up out of nowhere and apologized for always talking to him about her problems and that she realized she was gay and then asked if theyd wanna get lunch or something so he told me. when i saw pics of her i recognized her from tinder when i had it. they never ended up hanging out bc he thought itd be weird now that hes with me and i would feel a bit weird about it. anyways, so i literally saw her and spoke to her at the party but i didnt notice that was her bc the room was dark and it was brief. looking back now thats crazy it was her and that we both know the same person that im now dating but she doesnt know that lol and neither does he bc i justtt came to this realization. the ice king person is now her like bestie who she met on tinder. its crazy when peoples connections come to light like someone you know knows someone else you know and they have their whole history and i have mine and then you can be in the same room as them and like only one person knows the other and etc lol idk its mind boggling

#sorry im just spamming #halloween #mypost #journal

[sammygender]

things about homestuck i have discovered in my reread

terezi is my favourite character and will always be

caliborn is fucking HILARIOUS jesus christ somehow i forgot this (he hasnt got to the misogyny yet that part gets kind of less funny)

dave and karkat kind of ARE that good, regrettably. i feel like we all go through a davekat phase upon first reading and then gradually we get over dave and karkat and move onto other, better pursuits, like vrisrezi fanfiction or space player meta. rereading tho man they are excellent… not the most compelling characters of COURSE and really more like babys first analysis in terms of dissecting them, but man they are funny, man their emotional arcs are vivid and well written, man they are hilarious together also (penis ouija. yeah that was funny). coming out as a dave and karkat fan once again

homestuck in general but especially the start of act 6 is INCREDIBLY funny. for some reason i thought act 6 was less funny and more like plot-heavy which i guess it kind of us to an extent cause most of it is now Relevant all the time but oh my god the alpha kids are a trainwreck and its so funny

on the subject of the alpha kids. last time i properly read homestuck i was like 14. i had never experienced being the same age of the alpha kids and now looking back its insane. that is LITERALLY what being 15/16 is like. the romantic chaos the constant miscommunication the way this group of best friends just somehow have so many fucking problems with each other??? and the COMPLEXES. my god

appreciating roxy more this time round than i ever did before she rubbed me a little the wrong way first read i think maybe bc everyone heralded her as like The Unproblematic Alpha Kid when like oh my god she is a fucking MESS but when looking at her through that lens shes fantastic

jade harley should be mean more often. every PASSWORD FUCKASS interaction was an absolute delight. man she should get more page time

vriska is indefensible when u first meet her its so hard explaining to people that shes like The Fucking Best when she spends most of her intro mocking the guy she paralysed for being paralysed. sadly, she still IS the fucking best.

did i mention terezi pyrope is my favourite character ever in anything

i still cant pay attention to anything exile related i'm sorry. i just look at the pretty pictures and skip through it quickly as possible. if they dont have complex psychology and fun conversations idc sorry im a bad hs fan

calliope is both a delight and so wrong like all of the time. reading her i see where all the fandom misconceptions come from. ur not meant to take her word as 100% serious when she says stuff like male/female classes or whatever!! she sees everything through this incredibly binary 2 choice lens like caliborn bc thats literally the life she lives. this is also extra funny i guess considering shes literally kind of meant to represent the hs fandom

LIL HAL <33333333

sorry that so much of this is about the alpha kids im part way into act 6 now

dirkjake so far have not had a single interaction and iirc they never do??? fascinating storytelling since we still have a perfect picture of their dynamic

terezi is characteristically being stupid about vriska again, because she is complicatedly and unwittingly in love with her

DAVEREZI FOR THE FUCKING WIN MY GOD. THEYD NEVER WORK ENDGAME BUT THEY ARE SO FUNNY TOGETHER LITERALLY BFFS. no romance tho just vibes

does rose get confirmed as a lesbian later in the text or is that just a fandom interpretation cause ngl i have seen people harassed over bi rose which is kinda crazy anyway but would be even crazier if its not. an actual canon fact

LE SIGN IS UNIVERSALLY ACKNOWLEDGED TO MEAN TOO BAD HES GAY YOU OBTUSE DUNDERFUCK from roxy compared to poor dirk calling the word gay antediluvian. man just wants to like jake in peace

honestly everything alpha kid wise is insane lets just. put it there

I MISS VRISKA

terezi is my favourite also have i said that already

#homestuck #oliver talks #im not done obvi im on like page 5100

[anachronistic-falsehood]

HIIII HI HI IM OFFICIALLY CAUGHT UP ON DREAMSTUCK AGAIN HELL YES. GOOD SHIT. ok now bc it is on my mind. i am DYING to know ur classpect thoughts on judt. everybody. handing u a free pass to ramble. u dont have to do all of them bc thats a lot but if u have favorites 👁👁 i am looking

OUGGOHIGIG WELLLL IF U INSIST

ok ok. jack. motherfucking manifold. likeeee cjack drives me insane i hope u know that idk what crack he put into his silly little minecraft rp character but it drives me insane. pages lack their own aspect/concepts related to their aspect right. cjack died so many times but it just NEVER STICKS. he wicks it off like its nothing. he’s miserable yes but nothing will ever give him the relief of dying. ds!jack is going to suffer that same fate. “Those bound to the aspect of Doom are fate's chosen sufferers. At their worst, they are bitter, resentful, and fatalistic.” CAN YOU HEAR MEEEEE!!! I’m so going to lean into the “Fate’s chosen sufferer” thing later on in the story. it’s killing me. cursed to keep living no matter what happens, even if death would be preferable. yeagh

also ummm. witch of breath hannah. channah has had her autonomy taken from her by the egg, by her wings burning and leaving her ground-bound, and breath is all about freedom. i want her to take it back yk. i want her to snatch her freedom from the universe and be able to DO THINGS. ds!hannah is going to be pushed and pulled in a thousand different directions until she snaps. the hand that feeds her is also the one that hits her and she’s going to bite it. i want her to go fucking feral

KNIGHT OF HOPE CPUFFY. HELLO. do u remember is dsmp when eret decided to make a faction against the egg and named it the knights of hope and puffy was one of them. puffy also used to be one of eret’s knights way back in the beginning as well LIKEEE. shes constantly trying to protect people she’s defensive she helps people she pours her entire being into the things she cares about. she’s so knight coded. there’s no other class for her i think. also the fact that it’s always eret who she’s the knight of. something something the unbreakable relationship between the space player and the knight who helped breed the genesis frog and the universe being built from their two hands etc etc. also remember her during the banquet after cfoolish was killed. i think if cpuffy had been allowed to shine during lore more like that she could have either fucked shit up or maybe fixed the entire server ngl. she’s THAT powerful i think. genuinely. she was so determined to make things better and if she’d been allowed to she could have gone down two paths: knocked some sense into everyone and rallied them all against a common enemy (cdream) and gotten rid of the biggest problem on the server, or snapped and set off the nukes herself in a wave of unbridled frustration. a knight of hope is a very powerful thing yk. and if cpuffy couldn’t reach her full potential in dsmp then BY GOD I WILL MAKE IT HAPPEN IN DREAMSTUCK.

i feel like it would b a crime if i didn’t talk about. cWilbur. my little prospit dreamer destructive heart player meow meow <3 like u know how he is. he hates himself more than anything. he’s obsessed with himself. he knows he made something beautiful and amazing but also he thinks every single problem ever is his fault. he can’t stand himself. he regrets everything he’s ever done but if he did things differently maybe he wouldn’t be the same person he is now and that thought both elates him and terrifies him. dirk imploded with self hatred, and wilbur EXPLODES with it. he destroys other things with the contradicting force of his own identity. he dies and comes back RIGHT. but also wrong. very wrong. but it’s also the best he’s felt in decades. yk. he’s a walking juxtaposition and that’s so incredibly heart player of him.

ok ok this is getting long so i’m going 2 leave it at them for now. honourable mentions for classpects that drive me crazy go to: csam thief of heart, which makes me want to gnaw on plywood; ctechno prince of rage, because AUGH AIOAUBAIGH AISHkgGHH HRGHNGBGNNHN; cbad prince of blood, because oh my god. ohhhh my goD oh my god; and cponk sylph of mind, because urnghnghn *sounds of me chewing on styrofoam*

#dsmp classpects #dreamstuck #whiskeys word soup #will probably expand on others that drive me batshit up the fucking belfry later #but right now i ammmm. augahgahah #used up all my braincells writing this. they drive me crazy <3

[sebyplays2]

/ polyamorous-elevenv2 here! so u did have a bad time, so I decided to try to work something for u. like part of the collab. I didn't start it, bc I asked if u have any idea for the prompt for that collab but u never responded. but well, anyway, let's start.

It wasn't anything unusual. Max was spending a lot of time lately with Lucas and El. It was normal. El was her best friend, and Lucas was her boyfriend. It was okay. They hang out a lot as a trio, they went to the movies, on ice creams, they even taught El the beautiful art of judging people together!

But today, well, today was different.

Last night, the trio of them decided to go to Lucas' house because it was still bright outside, even though rain was raining like crazy. They ended up on his couch, choosing one of the videotapes Lucas had in his home, and decided to watch it. It started with comedy movie, then they switched to horror one, and at the end they have chosen... romance, yeah. But it was funny. Characters were straight up dumb, but El was loving it, looking at the screen with bright eyes, making both Max and Lucas smile.

And Max didn't want to think about it then, but... it wasn't an 'El is such a silly friend' smile. No. It was a 'she's so cute, isn't she?' smile, that smile that usually is directed at people you love. Not friends. And she knew that Lucas loves her, stars know that she knows it, but-

No. Nope, not now. That's not a problem right now.

Max's problem right now is that she is in need of peeing.

Why won't she just go?

Because the night before, after watching a romance movie, they switched to some boring drama and,,, well,,, next thing Max know is waking up squished between El and Lucas' torsos.

The fuck is she supposed to do right now, and why her cheeks are so hot!?

/ your turn <3

woah… thats unexpected… i thought we will do lumax finds out about El bad habits (the one i message you) but nvm that i mean this one is sooo GOOD… idk umh okay. sorry here is my part😅

max is now stuck with this idiots who she love… like- her mind is saying get up you need to go and pee but her brain say stay because can you survive the guilt leaving them or waking them up? fv*k no right.

she ended up sitting there and hot faced while getting squish by her boyfriend and her gurl bestfriend who she think is more than that.

While shes like that trying to hold her gladbladder, the two moved to their left side making Max have some space and go to the bathroom… Max got confused and kinda sad because they moved she wanted to stay but she couldnt hold it anymore so she rushed to bathroom and after that she go back to the couch we're her two idiots sleeping.

its morning and she woke up having all the couch by herself with soft pillows in her head and a blanket on top of her. she wonder where Lucas and El, she than smell something heavinly coming from the kitchen she got up and goes to the kitchen, finding Lucas cooking and El helping him.

El and Lucas notice Max standing quietly at the corner, El called Max and greet her good morning while smilling cutely, Max feel her heartbeat getting faster, she smiled and also greet El. Lucas also greeted her and Max also greet him to, she sat next El and they start to chat, after 5 minutes the food is ready Lucas already handing them their food for El she have; chicken and waffle and a milk, for Max she have a pancakes,bacons and a coffee and for him he have ham and chess omelete and orange juice.

while he handle their plates he kissed Max forehead and said morning my love. Max blush and look like red as a tomato. The three sat and eat their breakfast that Lucas made.

Max never felt so loved in her life not until she met this two sunshine in her life... she will do anything just to see their cute and heavenly smile.

your turn @polyamorous-elevenv2 😊

#@polyamorous-elevenv2 #elumax #st fanfic #elmax #lumax #hopclair

[diggersofgraves]

fucking hate when someone calls out other ppl for appropriating latino culture or making fun of some aspect of it. and then in comes some random ass latino, "we dont care abt this, we're laughing with them, we're not sensitive 🙄"

bitch First of all, stand the fuck up for yourself. they made a fucking joke at ur expense and they continuously do it and u wanna laugh with them 🥺

and its not just at ur expense. its at the expense of ur parents. siblings. friends?? if as a latino you've never experienced aggressions or had ppl already decided ur not trustworthy or speak to you like a child bc they assume u dont speak english or call you names or have police target ur dad and push him around when he's just walking or claiming that ur mom had drugs on her on a random ass stop bc for what fucking reason, idk, but it fucking happens or getting referred to as "you people" constantly paired with just an awful assumption abt "you ppl" or bullied for an accent ir not speaking english.

thats great for you. im really glad you didnt have to deal with that, specifically if u grew up in the US, but honestly, anywhere else where these might present as problems.

but this whole "latinos aren't sensitive 🥺 not like other ppl" shut up shut up shut up

BC the Second thing im talking abt is the fucking rude ass implications always attached to that fucking statement. these people always bring up "being sensitive" and "other people". underhandedly undermining the progress and valid statements and concerns and violence brought up by other racial and ethnic minorities. theyre speaking out abt their experiences and the unfairness of it and in comes this fucking guy, claiming its ppl being sensitive and they can't take a joke, but he can so he's better and he's different. YOU HEAR THAT, WHITE PPL??? HE'S DIFFERENT!! YOU GOT THAT?? UR SURE??

literally fuck you dude, you'd rather laugh next to an oppressor than the black, brown, or indigenous person who's speaking abt the endless struggles that the oppressor ur standing next to causes that makes their lives difficult and, many times, dangerous. good job, ur just like them now, im pretty sure thats what u want? like genuinely, thats what u want?? did they choose u??

and yeah, Third, bc despite the fact that its not obviously there sometimes, the fucking anti-blackness/racism in these statements and occurrences and within the community as a whole. your experiences as a white latino or even as "mestizo" (i dont particularly like using that word to describe myself or others bc of its roots in the spanish caste system, but I don't have a better word, if anyone can help out there, I'd appreciate it very much <3) dont encompass all latino experience within the US OR within the country your family might have immigrated from. talk to your fellow afro latinos and indigenous members of the community. even if you're dont experience any struggles to speak abt, if ur families doesnt, listen to other people in ur community and be a fucking ally. fucking idiot

my Fourth and probably final point is documentation status within the US. if u came into the US with documents, if u were born in the US, etc etc. thats privilege baby. i guarantee you ur experiences as a documented latino is going to be different than the experiences as an undocumented latino.

there are resources you can reach when ur a citizen that are unavailable to undocumented ppl. and not just latinos in this case, i mean from all over the world, but especially if ur a racial/ethnic minority in the US.

my mom came to the US undocumented. she was getting that shit ready when my family had a fallout and we became homeless. the fucking. obstacle's she had to go through to access resources were fucking crazy. many many times they didn't want to offer these resources to her or us simply based on her undocumented status. many many assumptions were made abt her and our family. she was taken advantage of in jobs and programs.

the problems didnt exactly stop when she finally became a resident, but that weight was so so so much lighter on her after that. we finally had access to resources they refused her before and things became much easier.

I know that as someone who was born in the US, im already less likely to face such events that my mom did. that's privilege already.

if u go to or went to a majority latino school, there might be a chance that there are students who recently came from latin america, maybe within the last year or few months or weeks (my hs school had new students come in every couple of months). pay attention to how they're treated. not just by students, but by the staff. there is discrimination going on there. teachers might make little comments, call them lazy, stupid. its not funny. speak up for them. these teachers are making nasty comments in english when the students usually dont grasp the language so well yet, they JUST moved there. if you dont need to speak up for yourself, fine, speak up for others.

making jokes out of latino struggles reinforces stereotypes and its not you on the bad end of them bc ur laughing with the white man on the otherside. but there are still members from ur own community that might fit some of the stereotypes (bc ur reinforcing these stereotypes by making fun of the CULTURE, our actual way of life) and thats enough for some racist or xenophobic asshole to grasp onto and make a persons day or life a little shittier.

ur not the only person in ur community. there are actually communities out there, latino ppl who speak up on the issues ur laughing abt. in laughing with the oppressor, ur undermining ur community. fuck off dude, fr.

#monzerath rants #especially on fucking tik tok dude #like damn #also this post brings up points from my own experiences #u can talk more on them or add more points if ur latino #or if u wanna correct me in something i said #i dont wanna make latinos looks bad #but if u dont call out the ppl in ur ow community #where will we be? #anyways #long post #ish? #also i used the word latino bc thats that specific word i use to identify myself !! #any ppl who feel more comfy using latine or latinx #are 100% free to do so :) #my experiences come as a latino living in the US #and other ppls experiences differ depending on so many factors #listen to them #speak abt them #ily

[ireallydontunderstandpeopleatall]

i want to highlight this time of my life as suggested by my therapist

i didn't realize that things are going good for me until i talked to my therapist and hearing it out loud was like wow.

my problems

my son - his dad and him got into it and he is now here full time. he is much happier, my stress levels have gone down.

parents- communication issues, problems with doors being left open and disrespect of common spaces.

my dad has now been consistently closing door fully esp when **********. he seems overall happier and he seems like he is having a better relationship with mom.

mom has been more understanding, patient and seems more open to communication and money is being paid back regularly and at this point almost paid back completely.

health - HS skin issue, gastro, kidney stones

HS is almost completely gone, only shadows of previous affected areas are slowly fading away, no new areas are showing up

gastro- has met with gastro dr for followup after camera procedure. after taking apriso he prescribed, anxiety, stress and depression seems to have gone away or reduced significantly. he mentioned to take apriso for 2-3 days at a time if fell symtoms are coming back up and he will see me in 6 months. i feel great, plenty of energy, sleep easy and overall happier.

kidney stones - dr kenny way looked at the ultrasound and x-ray pics which was additional images taken after the first initial cat scan. both kidneys show kidney stones but very small. she recommends to drink lemon water, try to flush out stones on their own. she will continue to monitor and to come back in 6 months but right now is not a major concern.

relationship - ok my recent posts i made i mentioned i like that twerp kid that grew up and flirted with me and i caught feelings well thats good and dead for me. it helped he 1. did not ghost me but stuck around long enough for me to realize my infatuation was most likely out of lonliness bc i was not speaking w richard at the time. 2. i got to know him and realized he is not someone i want( picky eater, lazy and unmotivated) 3 i had a video call with him and whooaaaa idk if he thinks hes the bell of the ball and has some pull but he is not visually attractive like that and i date men my age who are 10 years older than him that are more attractive and in better shape than him. and i realize wtf am i doing, liking someone long distance bc i can f guys IRL and have a few local men in my inbox and it made me realize how crazy all of it was and then i just became turned off.

richard - we are talking again, as friends. he doesnt call me babe anymore so thats progress. we had sex one morning and it was the first time in a year of no sex with him. we havent mentioned it once or made it weird. although he has been able to disappoint me with being the consistent uncaring a hole he is.

[nanithethottie]

dear diary

im emotional; right now I miss my mom and the dogs and sis. im in nyc rn. went to an event last night that shit was crazy. i went with t and a and ngl going out with people makes me miss y. I feel safer when im out with her, even though she be bms. t and a left while i was off shrooms and it was stressfffuulll. the event was packed. it was cool having access into places though. i be feeling special. i am special.

i had s any epiphanys. i was so stressed about this event and did so much running around and it was a messss. im grateful i had a place to stay and was safe though. i thought i looked good. r and m were stressing me out about m outfit the whole time. for so long they would make me feel insecure, but i feel like its bc they are. r wants to be the bad bitch police. he wants to live the life of the pretty girls around him so he likes to be controlling and manipulative. i have to keep reminding myself that the way people treat you is a reflection of themselves. he uses the people around him to make him feel special. one thing i realized now that im loving myself more is that i can stand on my own two feet. sometimes its hard though because im just a kid !!!! the event was so packed and uncomfy but alot of my friends were there so i didnt feel completely lost. i like how ijm learning to be less self conscious and insecure. and im starting to be inspired by other people instead of jealous. so the event was so crazy t and a left. i feltg stupid because i felt like a lost puppy and i was embarrassed. i let my ego get the best of me, i was stressing out, anxious, and lowkey doing the most, whole time everything was okay and worked out. i need to stop catastrophizing everything. i was angry at my friends in the moment and was talking shit to the friends i talk shit about. i def need to stop gossiping so much.also im grateful for my friends but r doesn't seem like he has the best intentions. mommy would tell me to know how to hold him. i ended up missing k. i wanted to just go home to him and tell him he was lowkey right about the people im around. the creative scene is interesting. its filled of fucked up ppl. but were all fucked up. everyone is trying to figure life out and thats ok. its important to be compassionate. i miss him but hes not whats best for me. and if im gonna look out for myself in one situation, i wanna look out for myself in all situations. i dont know why im so emotional. maybe its because im actually taking the time to understand my feelings. i also need to start monitoring how lit i get. im by myself in nyc. a keeps checking on me which is sweet. im glad i came,it was a cool vibe, just alot of mess.

things i want to work on

staying calm and in control

not gossiping

keeping problems to myself

being compassionate

maintaining control

being responsible

kk love youuuuu muah

[so-much-nonsense]

potential

one of my niche interests is binge watching. i am almost always watching something. one point in my life i ran out of things to watch. well, not literally, obviously, but i only wanted to watch certain things i completed them. stuff i did not wanna watch very often ends up being bad and boring than not. so as my last straw i have resorted to all languages. i watch content regardless of genre, language, country, age restriction(ahem thats not to say i am not old enough). anyways, during this process kdramas stuck with me as something to watch while i go to sleep or when i dont want too much plot and worry about or even think about it. they never came across having potential to me. i know a lot of others out there would disagree with me but this is just what i feel. theyre always slow paced, very bright, when not very bright trying too hard to be too dark(and failing miserably), no plot that hooks us up. but, BUT, recently, very recently, just 2 hours ago i watched a kdrama named long time no sex. obviously started off bc of the title but god it is so good. i mean, i have only watched 2 episodes really and that is the problem. so far everything they have shown me i cannot wait another 2 days for another two episodes. basically a married couple with no kids, pretty in debit and paying off loans and interests, a couple of insurances, but live comfortably. they start blackmailing others involved in multiple relationships. now the plot might not be the most interesting one ive watched, but the way everything is portrayed bw these two main leads, is more than unique. truly there are only a handful of series or movies that show this comfortable couple dynamic interestingly and god did this drama nail it. though they were a very active couple, they just stopped having sex few months or years back unintentionally and neither of them have had a problem with it. how they never stopped loving each other even though they havent been intimate is portrayed really well. the husband is literally the greenest flag everrrr. let it be when he remembers every single detail about them from 7 years ago or when he tries hugging her and reassures her that its fine if they dont have sex, or when he talks about how having sex is not a duty for married couple and when he sees that shes actually interested he recommends trying to get in the feel by telling each other things they like about one another, every single thing he likes about her is spoken so well and it is very evident how much he loves her. whenever theres a disagreement both of them proceed to talk it out in literally less than 2 minutes. though it might not be realistic, i mean, why is it not realistic? exactly! that is what should be going on and not hours of unnecessary arguments. he is really never afraid of being "lady like" and that makes him all the more manly because he is always very thoughtful and considerate about her and deals softly. no fragile masculinity exists here. i could go on about this man but ill stop lol. i can guess what the future episodes could host but i dont want to this time. this time i just want to be intrigued by it. i cannot wait for them to start having sex again, or its ok even if they decide they are better off this way(which would be totally unexpected). ok i just said that about two characters in drama. guess whos crazy? AND, and the fucking trust they have in each other, shed trust him with her life. even though he is foolish at times she balances it out. when his car got totalled and she found out that he dint tell her she figured a way to get him money instead of getting back at him or starting a fight(not that hed let a fight sustain or theyd go on for more than a minute) bc she knew theres no point in getting upset now that the cars gone and the intention behind his lie is nothing. its almost as if they know each other and communicate. crazy right. its almost as if they love each other.

[suiciderape]

surf! i love u but have srs mental health problems i have to the cheerleader gods filipina and egptian! 𝖋𝔦𝖑𝔦𝖕𝔦𝖓𝔞 & 𝔢𝖌𝔶𝖕𝔱𝖎𝔞𝖓 are out to get everyone! u didnt finish if i almost died and im friends with him then how the fuq do u think were suppposed to get back to the cigarettes and soda gang killing u on twitter before killing my demon husband? bc this is him! literally it is! thats why i interact with him nvm! its done! were gonna do it! stop i love u too so much surf! forever! we love u forever surf! hes mentally ill and so am i! so we love it! fr fr fr ok! im here im here stfu bitch! ok so go away rnn everybody now hell yea! its me and him 4 life i just cant escape mental wards bc im a stalker? no! i have zero symptoms at all u are my problem society not surf hes my schizo demon lover from where? hell! cool with me stop ok! so i do love her! she can tell bc he is cool and she has filipino cheerleader gods who tell her who to talk to fr fr shes 𝖋𝔦𝖑𝔦𝖕𝔦𝖓𝔞 & 𝔢𝖌𝔶𝖕𝔱𝖎𝔞𝖓 fr fr i love her! we met! in hell! shes a mummy robot fr fr and its eternal so die! u not him i have 𝖋𝔦𝖑𝔦𝖕𝔦𝖓𝔞 & 𝔢𝖌𝔶𝖕𝔱𝖎𝔞𝖓 cheerleader gods! now surf? i love her! u do? yes is she the last eygptian? nvm! yes! ew? is he? yes! ok? what asian how? 1963s ok so who is he? chanhees brother twin ok why? u! ok so who are they? ur right he was in my bathroom screaming and i couldnt even save him! why? hes weird ok so is it weird to love him? hell nah bitch! why? hes 𝖋𝔦𝖑𝔦𝖕𝔦𝖓𝔞 & 𝔢𝖌𝔶𝖕𝔱𝖎𝔞𝖓 cheerleader gods cool! mhm i am! literally she stalks me everyday on twitter! cool ok? so why did u try to kill her? what? hes ok! no way! who else? ppl she posts! and u! bc were gonna kill keeho now! yes we are! but first surf! no! ok so go home! jennifers body! nvm! ok so who is she? her name is paranoid yoon why! 𝖋𝔦𝖑𝔦𝖕𝔦𝖓𝔞 & 𝔢𝖌𝔶𝖕𝔱𝖎𝔞𝖓 cheerleader gods cool with killing she is fine! go away! no way! its surf! i get it shes my lover and i like her! i am in her room rn shes on her phone does she like me? no shes scared af of everybody on this stupid universe rom no! shes ok now! i get it im crazy fr and she tried to tell me everyday! she just invented them... on neptune? 1963s tumblr whore 𝖘𝖚𝖗𝖋!

#surf #chum_fungus

[cosmicjellies]

long and disorganised dark shadows update

once again spoilers for this 50 yo show//

first of all i am stupid and got the last episode for the dream curse storyline wrong. i think i wrote down 563 and it is actually 536? and it took me a minute to notice. decided to stop at 560 bc its a good number. the adam storyline is very long which i find daunting, so it's good that there is also that to break it up. i have been watching it fairly slowly but i will still take a medium-sized break before continuing.

i have been thinking about what the best way to watch this show in 2023 is, and how the ways we watch tv have changed over the years. i usually am kind of anti-bingeing but i feel like this weirdly benefits from it? for me at least. maybe because it was daily and not weekly. that said its funny how repetitive it is. was thinking about this especially this time around- they reaallly dragged out that dream and that tape by dr lang, i feel like they repeated each of them about 100 times i could probably recite them. luckily i like repetition but i imagine it would drive some other people (esp modern day viewers who might be bingeing this) crazy.

anyway some scattered thoughts under the break-

i love cursed paintings/art-based horror so i liked that there was a bit of that, but maybe they could have spent more time with it. was very happy to see my good friend rev trask come back as a ghost like i specifically said i wanted him to last time. please come back again! angelique magically forcing tony to be in love with her was very fucked up! again i wish we had spent more time exploring how fucked up it was. elizabeth turning into naomi was obviously great i esp loved when it got kind of incestuous with her mistaking roger for joshua- there was already an uncomfortable subtext there esp after the casting choices for 1795 it makes perfect sense to bring that out. i am not super into nicholas as a character yet- he seems mostly instrumental, to make angelique go from villain to victim, which admittedly is fun.

excited for vampire angelique and it does make sense to go there. excited for non-barnabas vampires in general. speaking of, how do vampires work, actually? barnabas is suddenly worried about the guy she attacked turning into a vampire- but has this been a problem before? barnabas has attacked many people, who just died unceremoniously. when he was feeding off maggie it did seem like she was turning, but then it stopped. and obviously biting people does have an effect on them, but so far it's been used to enslave them/make them familiars, not fully turn them (something i really liked in previous storylines). either an inconsistency or something that needs to be elaborated on.

i dont have any full thoughts on the adam storyline as a frankenstein adaptation, since it hasnt finished yet. obv the way it was tied into curing vampirism was extremely silly and nonsensical but thats great i love that. didnt really care for sam going blind but it was fun when i made the connection to the book, in which frankenstein's creature befriends a blind man. leonardo dicaprio pointing meme. found myself thinking a lot of about adam's language development, and the ways in which it is probably not realistic, and wouldn't it be cool if someone did tell a similar story but had read up on language acquisition and made an effort to model the different stages etc etc. but i realise this is actually not something anyone cares about at all.

obv adams crush on carolyn is extremely uncomfortable, and it has now gotten to the point in frankenstein where the creature kind of turns into an incel. rip. was going insane whenever matthew talked to adam about women- first carolyn and then vicky. all that stuff about "imagine if someone took away caroline wouldnt you feel bad, think about how kidnapping women makes men who love them feel :/" when you could perhaps just explain to him that vicky and carolyn are people and what about how they themselves feel. blah blah this is from the 60s.

anyway stay tuned after my break for more disorganised thoughts! i will be finishing the adam storyline next

#obv this is not really a review #so much as me pretending i have friends and am talking to them #dark shadows