#andrew thinks it's hilarious and unsurprising

[grooviestguru]

neil josten texts like a 65 year old man, and this is a fact

#full punctuation and spelling #he shades dan at one point for not using punctuation in trk #nicky is devastated #andrew thinks it's hilarious and unsurprising #is neil mad or just following grammar rules? no one knows #neil josten #aftg #all for the game #andrew minyard #andreil #nicky hemmick #dan wilds #palmetto foxes #the foxhole court

[nekropsii]

I would like to take a moment to acknowledge how fucking hilarious it is that people will decide and then assert that I’m white whenever I point out that there is racism in Homestuck. Especially the Anti-Blackness.

I would also like to point out that it is kind of disgusting to assume that scrutinizing the writings of a white author who is known to have been racist both before and during the writing of a particular body of work is somehow indicative of whiteness on behalf of the analyst.

It is frankly horrendous, considering this fandoms long, sordid history of silencing critical Black voices within its community. A big reason a lot of Black creators + analysts aren’t saying anything about the racial aspects of anymore is because so many other Black people got brutally harassed off their platform if they dared to breathe even one criticism in the direction of Their Lord And Savior, Andrew Hussie. People still get sent torrents of hate and threats if they speak their mind, especially if they approach it with any level of emotion… Even though Anti-Blackness would be something that affects them directly.

Which is… Both tragic and unsurprising. Black people are hardly ever afforded the right to their emotions when speaking about the racism that affects them every day. They’re often not allowed to be passionate, not allowed to get heated. They have to be calm, professional, and, most of all, palatable. Non-threatening. Words can’t express how much this sucks.

Here’s the thing. I know if I was an openly Black creator, I’d be getting a lot more shit for saying the things I do. People will reject what I’m saying based on the false assumption that I’m white, sure… But I can’t help but think that there’s also a lot of people who are only accepting what I’m saying… based on that same false assumption that I’m white. When people see criticism of Anti-Blackness in media by someone who is openly Black, they take that as them painting a target on their back. Racist people take Black people speaking their mind as an opportunity to pull the trigger on a gun that they were already aiming.

There’s absolutely plenty of normal people in between, but I’ve been in this community long enough- hell, I’ve been on the internet in general long enough. People just fucking hate listening to Black people about their concerns.

So I can’t help but think there’s some kind of… Ulterior motive to dismissing my criticism with the assumption that I’m white. I don’t have my race in my bio, so I haven’t painted the appropriate target on my back. If I haven’t said I’m Black- someone easy to harass into silence- then I must be white- something easy to label as ignorant to the struggles of any and all People of Color. I am neither white nor Black. You guys need to realize that other races exist.

And you need to stop being so fucking protective of a racist white guy that you don’t even know.

Seriously, just how often do people have to point out the sheer volume of times this guy has said the whole ass N-word and utilized Black caricatures in his work for people to accept that maybe Hussie was just actually racist, and that this has a tangible impact on what he writes?

Fucking hell, this isn’t rocket science, people.

#deranged behavior #homestuck #homestuck meta #homestuck analyis #andrew hussie #cw racism #homestuck.pdf #nekro.pdf #nekro.txt

[bladekindeyewear]

Boots reads Homestuck Epilogue part... one..??

Alright, let’s do this.  As I’ve said, the page after this one is all I’ve seen, I’m diving in unspoiled.  Also I gather from some of the non-spoilery chatter I’ve heard from my friends -- one of which warned me this sort of thing was coming a couple weeks ago, and I believed them (but didn’t want to) -- that this first epilogue-upd8 may not be the only epilogue-upd8, which isn’t surprising either given how Andrew works.

Alright, let’s go.  Hope my stomach can take it!

So, Page 1, the mock-AO3 page that’s the only thing I’ve seen before posting this.  The content warning is EXCELLENT, and gives me hope that this will be the usual Hussie-caliber and more humorous than heartwrenching.  :)

It also makes some serious sense that there would be multiple epilogues; from the sound of the summary, this one might focus more on John and then leave ample opportunity to discuss the others.

Let’s click page 2 -- oh, or contents: “Prologue”, this being a chapter list for this is another way to do it.  Clicking Prologue.......

Okay wow, this is novel format for the moment.  Good chance it won’t stay that way.

These first two paragraphs are well-written and ominous, sure -- describing stuff we pretty much already knew was happening, in different words -- but even though the writing isn’t really pretentious, there’s still a good chance Andrew *views* it as pretentious enough to find cutting away to art-style instead hilarious.  Onto the third paragraph...

Music and Calliopes the other Calliope is conducting, yeah... Oh, there’s a garbage disposal reference.  In regards to a black hole.  Like the one I kind of pointed to during Dave’s intro sequence in the Third Scratch theory and stuff in all those big theories.  The ones I was, er, wrong about... ahem.  Moving on.

“Your name is John Egbert, and you have just had a terrible, deeply pretentious nightmare.”

Pfffffffff  :D

I love you Andrew Hussie.  Reading on...

YES I see chat colors. Chat colors!!! I need chat colors.  Reading reading reading let me get down to them let me

Absolutely nothing of note has ever happened here in the entire history of the planet, which you would know, because you created it.

Baahahahahah.  :D

Okay yes I’m at the phone-sterlog.

Uh oh.

I am reading elevated levels of angst compared to usual pesterlogs in this log.  Which is to say, virtually any at all, really.  THAT doesn’t bode well for the outcome/overall tone of this epilogue.  :X  --Not to say it isn’t *appropriate*, given they still haven’t fixed/resewn Paradox Space together, but... yeah, *future feels* are popping up on the radar, that’s what I’m worried about.  I loved the tone of the snapchats and the feeling that everything was going to be fine, especially given how the ending “not being what I expected” shook me a fair bit, but to look forward to when that may end... D:

Yeah, Rose having some serious visions about some unfinished business they need to get around to instead of just fucking around and living their lives makes sense.  :X  --or at least some timeline version of them.  I’m imagining they’re living varied, excellent lives in a whole TON of timelines of promise that commit our imaginings of their potential futures to virtual canon, really, with the main thread that ties off Caliborn’s stage play almost irrelevant in comparison... that was kind of the whole point of the Ending of homestuck earlier, of that final anime flash, the fact that the victory and planet and *lives* they won meant a whole lot more than whatever Lord English’s irrelevant machinations were.

So... returning to the tail end of that main thread and seeing how *serious* it might be....... yeah. Kinda mildly panic-inducing. :XXX

You move the phone away from your ear and assume an expression you haven’t practiced in years. It is the look of a man who actually has something to do.

Okay that was good.

Ah, he’s twenty-three now!

Let’s click the next link. ==>

Fuck let’s not recount Rose’s substance abuse.

Oh, cool. Er, “cool”. Rose is getting some of Rosejaspersprite^2′s awareness of all her alternate-timeline doomed selves and their lives.  No wonder she’s worried about the substance abuse she technically mostly *avoided* in this timeline.

Light explicitly relating to knowledge, good.  That’s a nice aspect tidbit to have reiterated.

ROSE: There’s a different scale I’ve come to understand. Another dichotomy that’s less... emotional, I guess? ROSE: Consider, instead of the word “good,” using the word “essential.” ROSE: And what exists at the opposite polarity from essential is... ROSE: Something that is best not to contemplate.

ooh.  oooooh. holy shit.

okay NO, BOOTS/BKEW.  DON’T GET FUCKING EXCITED.

DON’T get excited.

It only SOUNDS like she’s learned to recontextualize the whole adventure in the rich context of the classpect system, that’s just your wild fanfic-y theoryimagination talking.  Shoosh.  (Even though she IS very, very, *very* clearly referencing the Light/Void dichotomy with the above quote.)  Just... tamp down your hopes, Boots.  Leave it at MILD hope.  Like cool porridge.

Reading on.

Alright, yeah, this universe exists beyond the timespan of the Green Sun’s influence.  Unsurprising, since it was heavily implied.  And she doesn’t have access to her expanded Green Sun powerset while *in* such a universe, which was also heavily implied by alt!Calliope or her denizen or I forget the exact conversation where it said she’d have to make the final journey without Green Sun powers or whatever.  That’s cool.  (Though having it spelled out more explicitly than usual does make it more awkward to have her use her powers for humorous purposes on MXRP in the future.)

OOOH DAVE KARKAT AND JADE ARE IN A PERPLEXING SOCIAL ARRANGEMENT YESSSSS  :D

Best news.  Okay reading on.

ROSE: You will need to travel back into canon and defeat Lord English.

Yeah I guess.

Again, the way the ending sort of put it was that..... our heroes did have to defeat Lord English eventually?  Or set right some prior stuff like doing the stage play?  But that part of the point of this whole story -- the Ultimate Reward -- was that it didn’t really matter, because they had earned nigh-infinite branching timelines of promise in a brand new universe where they could go YEARS AND YEARS living their lives in many of the ways they wished, richly enjoying themselves and starting civilizations that would last billions of years, loving and living and experiencing, only “needing” to go finally check off these other responsibilities in a single timeline of promise at the end of an extended period of vacation they chose with no particular urgency.  Branching years-and-years of essentially heaven as long as they EVENTUALLY fulfilled that particular endpoint, and they knew it.  More or less.

Rose phrases it pretty explicitly, though.  John’s powers are the only thing that can warp people through canon like that without restriction, so he was always to be involved, but... *he* needs to defeat him?  Does that mean alone?

JOHN: yeah, i had a feeling that was going to come up again someday. ROSE: I’m sure we all did. That is, even those of us without visions. JOHN: i was doing my best not to think about it. i guess we can’t put it off any longer then? ROSE: Now is the time. We are rapidly approaching a point of no return. If the decision isn’t made soon, it will be too late. The issue will no longer matter. JOHN: when exactly is the point of no return? ROSE: Today. JOHN: wow. JOHN: ok then.

Ouch.

That’s slightly more abrupt than the picture of branching bliss I just painted.

JOHN: fine? ROSE: Of course everything is fine here. ROSE: We’re outside of canon now. JOHN: yeah, i know. what does that actually MEAN though? JOHN: are you saying this isn’t really happening? ROSE: Of course it’s happening. ROSE: Just because certain events take place outside of canon, it doesn’t mean those events are non-canon. JOHN: oh. ROSE: In other words, there is an important distinction between events which can be considered to occur inside canon, outside canon, and those which are not canon at all. ROSE: The day we went through that door and claimed our reward, we passed a threshold between continua marked by differing degrees of relevance, truth, and essentiality.

Well okay then.  I was wondering why she used the word “canon”.  They literally DID escape the narrative literally as *well* as figuratively with that Juju, then, Neverending Story style.

Also, Light being highly tied to canon and Rose having spent so much time outside of it... yeah, I can understand the headaches more, too.

Alright, reading on, it seems Andrew is using Rose to more explicitly explain how he intends all the non-canon stuff he’s presented to us to “matter”, for those who didn’t quite get or fully believe the implied explanation from context towards the end of the story.

Heh, so the idea is that the urgency comes from “it’s been too fucking long since the story ended, and this epilogue needs to come out when an epilogue would still matter to anyone”.  That’s kind of brilliant.

ROSE: As long as we live outside canon, everything that happens will technically be “real,” but only conditionally. ROSE: There are certain crucial events inside canon which must happen in order to continue to prop up the legitimacy of events here on Earth C. ROSE: And you specifically, John, have a responsibility to make sure those events take place.

Closing threads closing threads CLOSING THREADS :D !!!!!!

FUCK is this epilogue going to be mostly devoted to TYING UP LOOSE ENDS and clarifying stuff??? :D  Like the HUNDREDS OF LOOSE ENDS that were left unanswered because the ending tried to paint it all as sidelined/irrelevant regardless of the fact that they hadn’t been answered/fulfilled, which had previously pretty much traumatized me around Homestuck’s end because I was (1) so used to Andrew expertly tying up almost every loose end eventually and (2) was a theorycrafter with explicit investment in the idea that Classes, Aspects, and most of these loose ends actually DID matter???  :D

Sign me the fuck up!!!  :DDDD

...I know it’s doubtfully going to be anything close to all I hoped for, but still.  Answers, contextualization, and John tying up loose threads.  Like that final frog warped in front of Jade as a child.  That’s good, that’s VERY good.  I’m excited instead of nauseous.  :D

--and yeah, reading on, Rose makes more explicit what I said earlier that the justification Andrew’s painting for this is “we have to wrap up all these loose ends before everyone forgets about Homestuck.”  That is hilarious.

Okay, so the juju is a big plothole. Heheh.  We’ve heard it called that earlier.

...Oh.  Oh huh.

Rose is pretty much explicitly talking about the stage play consisting of a bunch of non-canon ALTERNATE VERSIONS of themselves that mean the original versions of them living happily in the new universe won’t actually die.  Holy shit.  I mean we theorized that for a TIME with some of them but THOSE loose ends (like Roxy still having her mask on) were closed up toward the end...  So instead, having it put THIS way (preserving our ideas of them living full lives post-victory), and not only that but having John DO all this stuff RIGHT NOW to fix things retroactively with some really well-written contextual clarification we’re bound to get to help with the closure... god DAMN.  This is really good.  This is going to make a LOT of people feel a whole lot better about Homestuck.  Like me.  :D

...Pff, some other girl is getting punched by John in the face again.  :D  Don’t worry, Rose isn’t saying that this is the Vriska punch at the beginning of the whole Retcon arc and that this epilogue somehow happened in the middle.  (I hope.)

...Yeah Rose implies heavily that John is gonna die his heroic death if he does this?  Or it’s meant to make us THINK she’s implying that.  Yeah.  And she feels pretty fucking horrible about what she’s asking John to go through regardless, so.  (Yeah, everyone looked pretty genuinely dead but a few at the end of the stage play, but it was pretty uncertain.)  Either way, she’s acting like John isn’t going to “come back”, even if he lives through this.

Stupid feels.

Clicking the next link.  ==>

Hiiii roxy and callie!!! :D

Yes how polite of them.

“Ultimate self”?  Yeah, a sort of synthesizing of all the offshoots of her Heart and Mind, pulling it all together and realizing the full person she is and sum of her whole experience across all timelines, pasts and futures.  Yeesh.  Pretty uncomfortable for someone who ain’t a hypersprite.

...Roxy and Rose aren’t as close?  Is it because of the substance abuse, because of the Light/Void dichotomy literally-or-metaphorically distancing them (with how disparaging Rose just was about anything that isn’t relevant), or something else?

Ah, Kanaya hogged her until she got “sick”, that explains some of it too.

A bell tower? (DOOONNNNGGG)

Fffff interpersonal relationship mildangst.  Fuck

You and all your friends have dispositions affected by your classes and aspects. You think you know what that means in your case. But what about her? You can only speculate. Void is a place where things sink and disappear. Where they linger forever, but cease to exist. You aren’t actually sure if your feelings for Roxy ever really faded, or if they just grew numb with time and distance. Is it the same for her?

Holy fucking shit.  What a big middle finger to everyone who told me aspects didn’t matter to their personalities.  :D

...Though, I think he has it kind of backwards, since he still doesn’t totally understand all this business.  It’s easy for those in canon, introduced to this subject, to think that the classes and aspects affect their dispositions, to an extent where the reality (at least I contend) is that it was their natural dispositions in the first place that the classes and aspects were actually describing.  The power that was latent in their very personalities and tendencies to action all along.

Reading... Ah, yeah, a choice.  Was pretty sure this terminology would be important earlier.  It depends on what SORT of choice this is though... see, so far, Rose hasn’t given John a lot of really EXPLICIT motivation to go through with this, other than some mumbo-jumbo that would supposedly be “bad”.  And it doesn’t even address the black hole in his nightmares.  And here, we have Roxy and others explicitly encouraging him with regard to the fact that he can choose NOT to do this if he wants to.

The main question it brings up (to the future of this epilogue, how it’s going to be considered afterward, etc) is if this is the sort of Choice that John would always say yes to -- in which case it’s more canon than anything else -- or if he will end up being on the fence enough for a Terezi-style Mind-split.  Because this would be the PERFECT out to have him “die” in canon.  See, if he’s on the fence ENOUGH about going, then he creates two timelines that even both potentially have promise within the confines of this universe (since universes hold more than one timeline of promise, according to one of the Calliopes I think)--  One where he lives here, happily ever after with everyone, and another where he completes his Heroic death in canon to fix everything.  It would let Andrew kill John in this epilogue while still letting him live out eternity with everyone else outside “canon”.

He’d get to have his John-death and keep him too!  Seems plausible enough.

Anyway. Reading... it looks like they know more about this decision that Rose has told them, including the consequences Rose might have been dreading.  And likely know that IF John might die doing this, that it won’t be in a way that he regrets.

Oh wow, that whole Meat or Candy sequence is GREAT.  Silly to the core, and yet perfectly emphasizing the debate that... well, I mean, think about what Andrew’s been telling us all along.

He keeps TRYING to tell us that non-canon stuff is fine.  Trying to use that huge ending sequence of Homestuck to try and tell us that the fact that everyone is FREE from this story and its confines, free for everyone to imagine COUNTLESS ways things played out afterward for ALL these lovable characters in carefree futures, is almost MORE important than any of these stupid loose ends.  But some of us were really cut by that ending, the insistence that the actual final battle “didn’t matter” and that this escaped-from-canon existence was the true victory.  But if Andrew just upped and drew a bunch of bonus pages to start explaining more story, THAT would cheapen the escape-from-canon ending he wanted even as it satisfied those of us who wanted ends tied up, who wanted questions answered.  He had to find a very careful, very well done way to give us BOTH.  To write out the real “ending” of “canon” for those of us who needed it, without compromising the ESCAPE from the very necessity of it that was the essential point he WANTED to make with Homestuck’s story from the very beginning.  To carefully keep the endless branches of post-victory possibility and play intact while still, separately and with explicit hedging and qualifications, give us the potential results of one last canon thread to tie up the lingering questions that he so dearly wants us to recognize still “don’t matter” as much in the vast scheme of things.

And he’s doing it.  And it’s WORKING.

Holy SHIT.

I am excited for Homestuck.  I am excited for Homestuck for the first time in years, and my nausea is gone.

I’m not going to start theorizing again; that’s over.  But I’m definitely going to keep reading as the new Epilogue chapters come out, and do so with a spring in my step.

To Be Continued.  :D

#Homestuck #Homestuck Epilogue #Homestuck Liveblog #bladekindeyewear #blastyoboots

[jacademia]

Film Allusions in Crimson Peak

Hi, all! So because I am deep in my horror movie feels at present and, as horror is a genre that some of you are new to/unfamiliar with, want you all to have some more context for Crimson Peak as an intertextual Gothic pastiche, I thought make a little list of films (mostly horror) that CP references, alludes to, or visually echoes (other than Jane Eyre or any iteration of “Bluebeard,” that is). This list is certainly not exhaustive, but I hope will give you a starting place at understanding the scale of the intertextual web this movie is weaving (also maybe give you some movie recs if you’re into horror/classic cinema. I’ll try to include links to films in the public domain).

Nosferatu (1922) and other early 20th century cinema

Del Toro makes use of a lot of the aesthetics and techniques of film from the late Victorian period/early 20th century (appropriate since Crimson Peak is set in the 1890s - incidentally one of the peaks of Gothic literature). One of these is iris shots/iris transitions (shown above in this screenshot from Nosferatu). Iris transitions are when a circular black mask over the shot shrinks, closing the picture to a black screen (very common in early horror film and 1920s cartoons, ie Betty Boop). If you’d like some very iconic, silent vampire cinema, you can watch Nosferatu here at archive.org for free.

The Old Dark House (1932) | Watch free on Archive.org

Seeking shelter from a storm, five travelers are in for a bizarre and terrifying night when they stumble upon the Femm family estate.

A trope codifier for the haunted house movie, complete with oodles of Gothic weirdness, including those ooky spooky, co-dependent Femm siblings.

Rebecca (1940) | Watch free on Archive.org

A self-conscious bride is tormented by the memory of her husband's dead first wife.

Based on Daphne Du Maurier’s novel of the same name (itself heavily based on Jane Eyre), this Gothic variation on “Bluebeard” was Alfred Hitchcock’s first American film, won two Academy Awards, and is still considered one of the best psychological thrillers of all time. Features an overbearing female figure who directly interferes with our protagonist’s marriage to her, er, Prince Charming in the form of a Sapphic housekeeper obsessed with keeping the memory of the first Mrs. De Winter alive.

Notorious (1946) | Watch free on Youtube

A woman is asked to spy on a group of Nazi friends in South America. How far will she have to go to ingratiate herself with them?

Don’t drink the tea! Also, butterfly-backed chairs. Allll the butterfly-backed chairs.

The Fall of the House of Usher (1960)

Upon entering his fiancée's family mansion, a man discovers a savage family curse and fears that his future brother-in-law has entombed his bride-to-be prematurely.

Two prongs here: Crimson Peak is very much playing with Edgar Allan Poe’s short story (incest siblings! Gothic manors sinking into the earth!) and evoking a particular aesthetic associated with a number of 1960s/70s “schlock” Gothic horror films like those made by Roger Corman who applied his use of vivid color and psychedelic surrealism to a number of Poe’s works. 

AESTHETIC!!!!! Speaking of aesthetic excess...

The Brides of Dracula (1960) and other Hammer Horror films

Vampire hunter Van Helsing returns to Transylvania to destroy handsome bloodsucker Baron Meinster, who has designs on beautiful young schoolteacher Marianne.

Known for a series of Gothic horror films made during the 1950s - 1970s featuring well-known characters like Count Dracula, Baron Frankenstein, and The Mummy, Hammer film productions hooked audiences with its use of vivid color, gore, sexy damsels in nightgowns, sexy women with fangs, sexy mummy girls, sexy... you get the idea. It left an indelible aesthetic mark on horror cinema since (including Crimson Peak). Also famous for catapulting the careers of Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing or, as you might know them, Count Dooku and Grand Admiral Tarkin from Star Wars.

The Innocents (1961)

A young governess for two children becomes convinced that the house and grounds are haunted.

Frequently listed as one of the best horror films of all time, The Innocents (one of Del Toro’s direct inspirations -- clock the nightgown in the screencap) is a loose adaptation of Henry James’ seminal Gothic novella The Turn of the Screw.

So many more under the cut...

The Leopard (1963) 

The Prince of Salina, a noble aristocrat of impeccable integrity, tries to preserve his family and class amid the tumultuous social upheavals of 1860's Sicily.

Another of Del Toro’s direct intertexts, which influenced Crimson Peak’s party scenes.

Suspiria (1977), the films of Mario Bava, and giallo cinema

An American newcomer to a prestigious German ballet academy comes to realize that the school is a front for something sinister amid a series of grisly murders.

A cult horror classic, Italian director Dario Argento’s Suspiria plays fast and loose with Gothic horror and fairy tale tropes, making for a slasher film quite unlike any other. Notable for its dreamlike surrealism, use of highly-stylized colorization, and sheer amounts of gore, Suspiria remains one of the most aesthetically influential horror films of all time and, looking at screenshots, you can maybe see its visual influence on films like Crimson Peak:

Guillermo Del Toro has also cited Mario Bava, another of the key figures in the golden age of Italian horror, as inspiration for his use of color and set design in Crimson Peak.

From Bava’s Black Sabbath (1963):

From Blood and Black Lace (1964):

Bava’s film, Blood and Black Lace, belongs to the giallo genre, which refers (at least, in English-speaking countries) to (largely 1970s) Italian horror thrillers/slashers notorious for their combination of intense, stylized violence and eroticism. Very much a precursor to the American slasher film.

The Shining (1980) 

A family heads to an isolated hotel for the winter where an evil spiritual presence influences the father into violence, while his psychic son sees horrific forebodings from both past and future.

As film that also loosely adapts “Bluebeard,” it’s perhaps unsurprising that there are so many allusions to Stanley Kubrick’s adaptation of Stephen King’s novel of the same name in Crimson Peak. 

And, man, does it have it all! Snowed in, Gothic entrapment! Threats of domestic abuse! Secrets locked away in forbidden rooms! Ghosts! So many ghosts!

Ghosts in the bathtub! 

Ludicrously enormous amounts of blood! Innocent waifs with the ability to commune with the dead! Intrepid third parties who heroically make an attempt to reach the isolated Gothic hellscape to help our damsel in distress only to get immediately merc’d! It’s all here, y’all.... except the incest, of course.

Flowers in the Attic (1987) 

Children are hidden away in the attic by their conspiring mother and grandmother.

Ok, this is something of a cheat, as Crimson Peak is alluding more to V.C. Andrews’ infamous novel of the same name, not the 1987 film (which is an abysmally terribly adaptation and hilariously bad flick). Anyway, abused siblings are locked away in an attic... and... well... things get all... Sharpe family values, if you know what I mean.

Bram Stoker’s Dracula (1992) 

The centuries old vampire Count Dracula comes to England to seduce his barrister Jonathan Harker's fiancée Mina Murray and inflict havoc in the foreign land.

If you liked Crimson Peak, I think you’ll enjoy this too, as, like CP, this movie is a sincere horror film, but also a pastiche/celebration of the Gothic and vampire cinema. It’s visually sumptuous and very high-energy (if you didn’t like CP or Moulin Rouge!, this one is probably not for you).

Sleepy Hollow (1999)

Ichabod Crane is sent to Sleepy Hollow to investigate the decapitations of three people, with the culprit being the legendary apparition, The Headless Horseman.

This is another one that, if you liked CP, you might enjoy. Based on Washington Irving’s "The Legend of Sleepy Hollow,” Tim Burton’s film evokes a number of genres and horror aesthetics, most notably the Gothic horror flicks of the 1950s/60s, to create a kind of Hammer Horror film for American Gothic.

The Devil’s Backbone (2001) and Del Toro’s other films

After Carlos -- a 12-year-old whose father has died in the Spanish Civil War -- arrives at an ominous boys' orphanage, he discovers the school is haunted and has many dark secrets that he must uncover.

Crimson Peak is not Guillermo Del Toro’s first foray into Gothic horror, as ghost stories and dark fairy tales are very much his specialty (as we shall see again in Shape of Water later this semester). I highly recommend his ghosts-as-a-reflection-on-the-trauma-of-war film The Devil’s Backbone and his take on portal fantasy, Pan’s Labyrinth (2006), as they’re both excellent and you can see echoes between them and the effects/visuals of Crimson Peak.

#crimson peak #horror #a long post no one asked for

[jemej3m]

dance with me

FROM THE SHADOWS SHE EMERGES

hi

heres a dance au for andreil because i dance and i love andreil and i thought it was fitting

“Point your goddamned fucking toes Minyard, before I lose my shit.”

Neil flinched every time Wymack yelled, but they were doing frappés, so it just looked like he awkwardly jerked his leg instead. He could almost feel Kevin glaring at him, right at the back of his head. That wasn’t good. He needed to re-dye his roots.

The Minyard in question was Andrew, who had rolled his eyes at Wymack’s request and given up on the exercise entirely, leaning against the barre instead, rolling his head around. He was still wearing an almost mid-thigh length shirt, sleeveless and cut down under the arms, those black woolen armbands, and his tights rolled up to the ankle instead of wearing shoes.

Neil wondered if he would get away with wearing a shirt: His leotard was thick enough that he knew you couldn’t see the scars through it, but he was still so conscious of it that dance still couldn’t take his mind off it.

“Rest.” Wymack huffed two exercises later. “Minyard.”

“Mm?” His head lolled in Wymack’s direction.

“Outside. Drink break!”

Kevin grabbed Neil by the arm and he flinched away. The iron grip meant he didn’t move, but Kevin felt the tug.

“You’re physically weak. You’re unfocused. You were improving over the summer: What’s so different now that the rest of the troupe is back?”

“Nothing.” Neil was defensive. “Didn’t sleep well last night, is all.”

Kevin narrowed his gaze.

He knows, he knows, he knows, he knows --

“Whatever.”

Neil let himself sigh with relief the moment Kevin stalked off. Matt brushed by his shoulder with a concerned look before pairing off with Seth. Aaron was just a mere distance away, unconcerned with the whole lot of them.

The girls were in a separate room with Abby, doing pointe work. He thought it was ridiculously uncommon to find such an unbalanced studio, where male dancers were so much more prevalent than females, but it didn’t seem too rare of an occurrence anymore. Palmetto Sports had only recently opened up its’ dance regime for broken and battered ballerinas and ballerinos in the past few years. Neil had never seen Palmetto Dance on a leaderboard before.

Neil hadn’t meant to let himself sign up. He’d never had someone express interest in him before. He didn’t know how these selective studios worked, except for that they strived for as much attention as possible to try and put their dancers into professional companies.

What am I doing here.

Neil spits at Andrew but it misses because he’s so wobbly on his feet. Distantly, he hears Andrew laugh: It’s more like a cackle than anything else. He can’t breathe without a stabbing pain in his lungs, thousands of needles digging into his ribcage. He keels over: He’s pretty sure he’s vomiting.

Being high is one massive risk: Being in Andrew’s presence is another. He can’t leave, though, because Andrew has him backed into a corner.

“What good is a dancer who can’t even stand upright, Neil?” Andrew laughs again. Neil’s disgraced state is amusing to him. Neil can’t see anything but flickering lights. “You’d better run, runaway.”

Neil doesn’t understand how Andrew guessed, unless Kevin had told him. Which meant Kevin knew. Because he’d put piece and piece together. And if Kevin could work it out, then it would be so easy for his father to figure it out, and he’d find him, and he’d be dead, dead, dead, dead--

Neil took Andrew’s advice. He ran.

Neil Josten stood in the wings of stage left, and he remembered how he ran from Eden’s Twilight, those few months ago. He remembered how he came back.

He remembered seeing Palmetto Studio’s stage for the first time all the way back in May: The black wing curtains, the tarquette laid down, the lights and the hundreds and hundreds of seats panning back.

He remembered the first night practise with Kevin, Andrew lying back on a yoga ball with his feet up on the big front mirror.

He remembered Kevin and RIko’s reunion on live television, and how he hadn’t held his tongue.

He looked at Kevin, who stood in front of him in the wings, waiting calmly for the music to begin. They’re performing a routine, the two of them, that they had never performed before. It won’t be enough to out-score Riko and the Ravens, but it might be enough to get them through into the Spring National Eisteddfod.

Neil knows that once he steps onto this stage that there is no turning back.

In truth, there was no turning back after he’d arrived here at Palmetto. He’d just been using this performance as the benchmark, to make himself more comfortable, an excuse to keep his mind happy so he could freely dance without all his shit weighing down his shoulders.

He turned around. Andrew stood behind him, a blank look on his face. Neil furrowed his eyebrows.

“Eyes on the stage, Josten.”

“Are you performing with us?”

“Neil.” Kevin hissed. “Shut up.”

Andrew did not look amused. Unsurprising: He never went on his meds for performance nights. “In Kevin’s wildest dreams.”

The music started. Neil took a deep breath.

“Up!” Riko snapped.

Neil dragged himself up off the floor, hands bloodied and blood dripping off his chin.

“Again.”

Neil looked at Jean as if to say you’re kidding me. Jean was not a funny person: He did not kid. He simply stared back, already positioned to start the duo again.

Neil looked back to Riko. He’d had enough for one day: He had another 13 to go. Surely there was time for this tomorrow. “I’m done with this. You sick fuck.”

Jean visibly winced.

Riko wasn’t so much taller than him, but the way he walked made him the tallest, most haughty, arrogant asshole in the room. And Neil was standing in a massive dance hall, Ravens lining the walls. The gentlest finger lifted Neil’s chin up.

“If you can still talk, you’re not done.” Riko grabbed Neil’s hair and tugged his head back. “I heard you’re flexible.” He kept pulling down. Neil’s vision spotted with dizziness, but he complied, reaching over to the floor in a backbend. “Hands to feet.”

Neil held his breath and walked his hands to his feet. His entire body pulsated with a pain so dizzying that he nearly collapsed on his head.

“Hold.”

Neil closed his eyes. Riko had a hand under his side, but removed it after ten seconds. Neil wobbled and slipped.

“Move, and I’ll kick your spine so it snaps in half.”

“Empty threats.” Neil managed, with so much blood rushing to his head that it sounded like he was wheezing. Maybe he was.

“Empty?” A new voice sounded across the hall. Neil closed his eyes again, staying still.

Tetsuji Moriyama put his cane under Neil’s back and pulled upwards: Neil was forced to put his hands back to where they had been before. The guttural scream he let out was involuntary at the thin wooden rod forcing him almost in two.

“Pathetic.” Tetsuji decided, and removed the cane. Neil dropped onto his back and sucked in the deepest breath his lungs would allow. “Jean.”

Neil was dragged to his feet. They made him dance until he could no longer scream, let alone speak, until the soles of his feet were bleeding.

And the next day they did it again.

“So who looked after Kevin?”

“Himself, mostly. Matt. Aaron. Nicky. It was a team effort.”

“And yet, I asked you.”

“My methods of protecting someone are not the same as yours. He’s still well and whole, isn’t he?” Neil crossed his arms. “I was protecting someone actually at risk.” Neil turned away from the cityscape to look at Andrew. Andrew still hadn’t looked at him.

“I do not need your protection.”

“You still have it.”

“It was pointless. Riko doesn’t keep promises.”

The last thing Neil wanted to hear. “I couldn’t not go. I couldn’t not try to alleviate some of it.”

“So you became a human punching bag in the hopes to salvage your fragile morality.”

“What it looked like to you is up to you. Maybe there was more I could have done, or someway to have done it differently, but what’s done is done now.”

Andrew finally looked at him. “Go.”

Neil did.

Kevin fell out of his 12th fouette turn with a scream of frustration.

“Don’t push it.” Neil warned him, eyeing the angrily red scarring on his left ankle.

Kevin only glared at him before preparing to spin again.

Neil rolled his eyes, easing himself down into his left-hand splits.

“Dance with me.” Andrew said, suddenly.

Neil looked up. “What?”

“Are you deaf? Dance with me.”

Neil wasn’t deaf, but he was baffled. “Why the sudden change of heart?”

“Definitely no sudden change, Josten.” Andrew was already standing, with his arms crossed and his customary nonchalance angling his hips, radiating through every part of him, all the way to the toe drawing lazy rond de jambes on the floor.

Neil stood up. “I don’t know any dances with you but the troupe ones.”

“Improvisation, Josten. Heard of it?”

Neil swallowed. “My least favourite aspect of dance. Yes, I have.”

“You’re hilarious.” Andrew offered his hand. “Yes or no?”

Neil hoped that Andrew couldn’t feel his heart thudding through his fingertips where their fingers were interlaced.

Kevin had been too drunk to practise. Andrew had still--unwillingly, but still-- accompanied Neil here instead. And yet here they were standing in the middle of the room

Andrew turned on a song and slid his phone across the floor, where neither of them would step on it.

Outro - M38

“Do you really hate improv’?” Andrew asked, head tilted. It made Neil think he seemed interested in whatever Neil’s response was.

Neil merely nodded.

“Close your eyes.”

He complied.

“Bend backwards.”

Neil swallowed. Every time, he thought of Riko, Tetsuji, Jean, the Ravens, the sleepless nights, the red, the black, the blood--

Andrew’s voice brought him back. “Hands on waist, yes or no.”

“Sure.”

“Yes or no, junkie. Sure wasn’t an option.”

Neil smiled a little. “Yes.”

The music vanished briefly: A low rushing of wind replaced it, and Andrew was holding onto him: He spread his arms wide and took a deep breath, eyes still closed.

Neil had never been poetic with words or smooth with unchoreographed dance, but he didn’t need to figure out what he was doing: Andrew moved his hips and his torso just swayed with wherever he was going, his arms stretching out. He couldn’t tell the difference between when he and Andrew were standing toe-to-toe, chest-to-chest and when they were facing away from each other on opposite ends of the room. His eyes were closed. It didn’t even matter.

You’re going to die soon.

None of that mattered.

So soon.

“Neil.”

Neil opened his eyes, breathing heavily. Andrew’s cheeks were flushed, a bead of sweat stagnant on his temple. He was standing right there: He’d been dancing, freely dancing, without being forced or bribed to. And Neil had kept his eyes closed the entire time.

“Yes or no?”

“Yes.”

Andrew offered his hand. Neil took it and went up into an arabesque. Andrew picked him off the ground easily. For a moment he was flying: the next he was laughing, breathily laughing, and Andrew dropped him back down to the ground.

“What?” He didn’t seem upset by Neil fooling around.

“You’re just,” Neil stood up straight again, recovering. “A better height to be my partner than Kevin is.”

“You really are a bit of an awkward pair. At least girls have pointe to make up for height difference.”

He smiled slightly. “Again? He liked it. Andrew was strong.

“Don’t make me do any more ballet than necessary, junkie.” Twice, he’d called Neil that now. He obliged anyway, and Neil didn’t laugh this time, not even when Andrew flipped him down and caught him instead of letting him extend and stepping down. Andrew dropped the arm around Neil’s waist.

“Thanks.” Neil huffed.

“For lifting?” Andrew rose a solitary eyebrow. “Or for not letting you fall?”

“Both.”

Andrew shrugged. “So long as it doesn’t become habit.”

Neil grinned.

It did become habit.

It all became habit.

Neil was enjoying one of their new additions to routine, smoking on the roof, when Andrew continued their secrets game: “My turn. Why do you like lifts so much?”

“You didn’t need to use your turn for that.”

“For a careful answer, then.”

Neil thought about it. “Flying insinuates freedom.”

Andrew hummed, looking out again. It didn’t matter if it was the stark stage lighting or the soft sunset: Both caught the hollows of his cheekbones and the blonde eyelashes.

“Why don’t you?”

Andrew tilted his head the other way. “Scared of heights.”

Neil choked on a laugh. “Oh, really.”

Andrew offered his wrist. Neil had no idea what he was asking Neil to do for a moment, but understood and took his pulse eventually. It was racing.

“Why do you like it here, then?” Neil’s voice quietened with peaked interest.

Andrew tsked. “One question too many.” Neil slanted him a flat look. “Don’t grate on my nerves this early in the day, Josten.”

Neil understood being dismissed when he saw it. He took Andrew’s cigarette and went inside.

“Dance with me.”

The room was pitch black: It didn’t matter. They knew where they were going, and where the other would be.

Neil wondered if Andrew would let Kevin see this: If Kevin would think it’s worthy. He thought about it before and after: In the middle of it he was completed consumed by it, by every brush of their fingertips and grip on each other’s arms, legs, shoulders. Neil never wanted it to end: He wanted it to loop in circles for long enough that he collapsed with exhaustion and forgot about the countdown, the Birmingham Heat coming up, the Ravens, Riko, his father, Kevin, the Moriyamas, his mother.  

The music finished, and they were standing toe-to-toe, chest-to-chest.

“Yes or no?”

“Yes.”

The kiss was long overdue.

“I watched my girlfriend strangle someone in a riot with pointe shoe ribbons.” Matt reminisced. “That was a solid moment of the weekend.”

“Did you forget that we obliterated Birmingham in their performance scores?” Kevin pointed out.

“And jelly donuts when we got back to Palmetto.” Nicky added.

And my father’s dead. Neil thought. He didn’t say that aloud. He merely looked at Andrew, and knew that he was thinking the exact same thing.

“We finished here?” Allison demanded. “You all eat so slowly. Remember we have a holiday to go to?”

“You have four more years with Palmetto.” Ichirou said, after a long moment’s silence. “If you don’t get into a professional company before or by that point in time, then you’ll be dead or gone. Don’t assume you’ll manage the second option.”

Neil decided that sounded tolerable. He knew he didn’t have much of a choice but he wouldn’t rather be doing anything else. He lived to dance, and now he’d be dancing to live: Fitting, really.

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

The Ravens weren’t prepared.

They weren’t prepared for the trio of girls to bring such fierceness and raw desperation.

Dan, Allison and Renee walked on stage with one stiletto, one pointe shoe. It remained to be one of the fiercest dances Neil had ever witnessed, and having witnessed how much the choreography had changed and improved since they’d started it, he felt a simmering in his stomach, an assured ferocity and pride.

The Ravens weren’t prepared for the synchrony of the troupe dance.

All of them filed on stage, stood in their respective positions, and told their story, individually and together.

Dance was never just movement and music. Neil didn’t have to look around to know that everyone was in the right place, or worry that what he was doing wasn’t good enough. He was fighting for every still, every arm, every jerk of his head.

Then it was done: They filed off stage, and Neil let Nicky hug him so tightly that it almost hurt.

“Neil, Andrew.” Wymack jerked his head. The others let him go. Andrew eyed Kevin, who just nodded. He was still eerily calm, the queen tattoo under his eye still a little swollen.

“Have you got this?” Their coach asked.

Neil held up his chin.

Wymack seemed satisfied. “You’ve got five minutes till you need to be side stage.”

Neil was already ready: He waited for Andrew in the wings, who was just speaking to Bee for a brief moment. The rest of the troupe were waiting patiently side stage.

Distantly, Neil remembered none of them had seen this dance before.

“Look at me, Neil.”

Neil looked at him. Andrew’s gaze was secure, his apathy only barely covering the determination that Neil could feel even from the briefest of fingertips brushed over his cheekbone.

They walked on stage together. Across the other side he could see Riko in the wings, the new pairing having caught his interest.

Neil took a deep breath and held on.

It was over in a moment. Systematically, Neil knew each step, every movement, every lift where Andrew threw him, threw him, into the air and caught him again. He knew every desperate emotion that would flit across his face at the crest and fall in the music.

It was a blur of lights and sounds and Andrew, Andrew, Andrew --

This was the moment we kissed, was Neil’s first thought when the music cut off at the end. Toe-to-toe, chest-to-chest. Andrew’s lips had the slightest of curls at the corners, like he was remembering the same thing.

Distantly, he heard the ecstatic screaming, the applause, the thudding of his heartbeat in his ears.

They hadn’t won yet, but it almost felt like he was already there.

im a sap for neil living a good life with zero complications

#andreil #dance au #aftg #the foxhole court #neil josten #andrew minyard #THE BALLERINO #i cry #david wymack #the foxes #jem writes

[catherinepenelopecooper]

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Meghan Markle and Prince Harry's Wedding Celebrity Guest List

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's wedding is fast approaching, with the date set on May 19. And now that Markle has allegedly had her bridal shower, it's time to focus on one of the most important aspects of the royal wedding—the guest list.

Prince Harry and Markle are scheduled to have two wedding receptions following the ceremony at St. George's Chapel at Windsor Castle. While the first ceremony will take place during the day, Prince Charles is said to be hosting a private celebration in the evening, and Mel B has already stoked rumors that the Spice Girls will be performing at the royal wedding.

Unfortunately the Obamas were confirmed to not be on the guest list—along with other political leaders like Donald Trump and Theresa May—but here are just some of the other famous faces rumored to be invited to Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's big day.

Serena Williams Williams and Markle apparently hit it off when they met in 2014 at a celebrity charity football event, according to the Daily Mail. The two have been close friends for several years, and it's been widely speculated that the tennis legend will be getting an invite.

Originally, Williams was slated to play matches in Madrid and Rome at the Madrid and Italian Opens during the time of the royal wedding, but she recently withdrew from the tournaments, following the advice of her coach, Patrick Mouratoglu, Page Six reports.

Markle wrote about becoming friends with Williams for her now-defunct blog The Tig, and said, "She quickly became a confidante I would text when I was traveling, the friend I would rally around for her tennis matches, and the down-to-earth chick I was able to grab lunch with a couple of weeks ago in Toronto."

Originally Williams wasn't sure if her plans to compete would interfere with her attendance at Meghan and Harry's wedding. "We'll see if I can make it," Williams said during a Good Morning America interview, according to ABC producer Carolyn Durand. According to Reuters, when Williams arrived to train with him in France in late April, she wasn't quite ready; as a result, she withdrew from playing in Spain and Italy.

The champion took a 14-month absence for maternity leave after the birth of her daughter, Alexis Olympia, and Mouratoglu noted that she was not yet in the shape she needed to be to play her best. "Serena had to rebuild her body. When she arrived at the Mouratoglou Tennis Academy, around April 30, we realized that she was not ready yet," Reuters reported. Said her coach, "The time she lost after the delivery, with all the medical issues she had to go through, was missing.”

While we're sure Serena is disappointed that she'll have to wait for the French Open to compete (the tournament begins right after the royal wedding, on the 21st of May), she's likely also elated that she'll get to be at Windsor Castle to celebrate with Meghan and Harry. Given the recent opening in her schedule, expect to see the athlete, newlywed and new mom in the pews.

Alyssia and Catherine Cooper Valmont

The Vogue Fashion Editors and activist arrived in London today .Cooper 's ties to the Royal Family may seem scarce, the Namibian government had asked Angelina on behalf of the Queen to participate in the QCC, or the Queen's Conservation Canopy, aimed at educating and funding the need for global forest conservation. Jolie and her six children visited Namibia recently (where Harry and Meghan will honeymoon in a few weeks) in collaboration with the QCC, and Jolie was granted the title of honorary dame by the Queen for her human rights work in October 2017.

While she could just be in London for work or leisure, odds are Jolie made it on to the Queen's short list for the royal wedding, given her connection to the philanthropic efforts Harry, Meghan and Queen Elizabeth II are so passionate about.

The Bradshaws A source recently confirmed to People that the Bradshaws will be attending the royal wedding ceremony and the evening's Frogmore House reception, due to Bradshaw boys and Harry's close friendship over the years. The source shared that they apparently hit it off when they past in the years at a celebrity philantropic sailing race with his royal highnesses prince William and prince Felipe De Borbone. Conveniently, Bradshaw's English countryside home resides just a thirty minutes drive from Windsor. ( Thōmas, Kyle, Landon, Bruce G.)

Misha Nonoo

According to the Daily Mail, fashion designer Misha Nonoo is Markle's close friend. The designer was credited early on with potentially being the matchmaker that introduced Harry to Meghan, although reports surfaced that Violet von Westenholz—a PR director for Ralph Lauren, who likely will also be at the wedding–was responsible for their set-up.

Nonoo's ex-husband reportedly attended Eton College with Prince Harry and Prince William, so she'll definitely be on the guest list.

The cast of Suits An insider confirmed to Hello! that the "cast and key executives" of the hit legal drama are on the guest list. "The cast has been contacted in regards to invites from Kensington Palace," the source said. Abigail Spencer is one of the co-stars rumored to attend.

Markle's onscreen love interest on the show, Patrick J. Adams, posted the sweetest tribute to his former co-star on Instagram. He wrote, "Playing Meghan’s television partner for the better part of a decade uniquely qualifies me to say this: Your Royal Highness, you are a lucky man and I know your long life together will be joyful, productive and hilarious."

After seven seasons of Suits, it seems likely that Markle is still in touch with her co-stars, and that many of them will be invited to the royal wedding. But, Us Weekly recently reported that they will not be invited to the intimate, 200-person evening reception hosted by Prince Charles.

The staff at Windsor Chapel was reportedly ordered to watch the show to become familiar with Harry and Meghan's wedding guests. "I’ve told the Stewards to get Netflix and watch Suits, so they know who everyone is at the wedding," Hugo Vickers, the Captain of the Lay Stewards at the chapel, told the Daily Mail.

Sir Elton John

It has already been reported that Elton John has cancelled two concerts because the dates clash with the royal wedding. While the singer's official statement calls it a "scheduling conflict," it seems highly likely that the singer canceled his May 18 and 19 world tour dates because he got a better offer.

Elton John was a good friend of Prince Harry's mother, Princess Diana, and famously sang his song "Candle in the Wind" at her funeral in 1997. Yesterday, it was confirmed that Sir Elton John will indeed perform at the couple's wedding. And, like the Clooney's, his house conveniently sits a stone's throw from Windsor Castle.

Priyanka Chopra

Quantico star Priyanka Chopra and Markle met at ELLE's Women in Television dinner in 2016. Chopra famously corrected Wendy Williams for describing Markle as "Prince Harry's girlfriend." She fiercely replied, "Meghan Markle, actress. Suits. Her achievements... just saying."

Chopra recently confirmed to Us Weekly that's attending the nuptials. Now, she's considering what dress she'll wear day-of. “I sort of may have an idea, but no, I haven’t picked one out yet," she told the site.

Nacho Figueras

In addition to the other celebrities and VIP's in attendance, the famous Argentinian polo player made the cut for the royal wedding guest list, CBS News reports.

This morning, Figueras told Good Morning America that he could not be happier for his dear friend, Prince Harry. Said the athlete, who has a loving marriage and four children of his own, "He's going to be an amazing husband, he hopefully will be a great father. I can't wait for him to go into this stage of his life... I'm so happy that he has found Meghan."

Sarah Ferguson, Duchess of York and his cousin Gabriel York

She's said to have a terrible relationship with her ex-father-in-law, Prince Philip (she was married to Prince Andrew for 10 years), but as she is Princess Beatrice and Princess Eugenie's mom, it was expected that she would get an invite. Recently, reports surfaced that while she was invited to the ceremony and general reception, she was snubbed from the evening's affairs. Expect to see the Duchess sitting with her children, Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie of York, during the ceremony–but Fergie was reportedly freaking out over not receiving an invitation to the dinner at Frogmore House, hosted by Prince Charles.

Millie Mackintosh

Markle has allegedly been friends with British reality TV star Millie Mackintosh since 2016. As Mackintosh has royal connections—her co-star on Made in Chelsea, Spencer Matthews, is now Pippa Middleton's brother-in-law—it's unsurprising that she's now friends with Markle. It's likely that Mackintosh will be in attendance.

The Spice Girls While on chat show The Real, when asked whether she'd received an invitation to the royal wedding, Mel B said, "Well, it was [the] five Spice Girls. Why am I so honest?" When pressed for details, she revealed, "Yes... It was proper. I’m not saying anymore! I’ve said enough... I need to go. I’m gonna be fired!" However, Mel C responded to the news, saying her fellow bandmate probably wasn't serious. "I think [Mel B] was joking. I think the media ran with it a little bit," she told E! News. Recently, it was reported that contrary to previous announcements, the Spice Girls "were never going to perform" at the royal wedding, an insider told Page Six. However, a few members of the girl group are expected to attend the big event: Victoria Beckham, Geri Halliwell, and Emma Bunton. According to the insider, Mel B and Mel C aren't on the guest list. 2,640 members of the public Harry and Meghan haven't forgotten about us normals for their big day. They're also inviting 1,200 members of the public "from every corner of the United Kingdom" (who will be nominated by nine regional Lord Lieutenant offices), 200 people from charities they're associated with, 100 students from local schools with close ties to Windsor Castle (The Royal School in Great Park and St. George's School), 610 Windsor residents and members of St. George's Chapel, and 530 members of the Royal Households and Crown Estate.

Daniella Timperley Who is Daniella Timperley? She's a high school student from Ireland lucky enough to score an invite to the royal wedding. CBS News reports that Timperley's grammar school announced on Twitter that she received an invitation as an ode of gratitude from the couple for her extraordinary charity work. Timperley was invited to sit in St. George's Chapel for the ceremony, and attend the luncheon hosted by the Queen at St. George's Hall.

Treviṣ L. Grey

Prince Harry reportedly invited guests from Malawi, with whom he worked on a conservation project, along with Prince Seeiso of Lesotho, who co-founded Sentebale with Prince Harry, a charity focused on providing aid to children diagnosed with HIV.

The survivors of the Grenfell fire Last June, a public housing fire at Grenfell Tower in west London killed at least 80 people. In support of those who survived the horrific tragedy, Harry and Meghan have invited the survivors of the fire to be with them in St. George's Chapel as they exchange their vows.

#tagged by

[heidimju4248-blog]

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Rather than getting revenge and also losing your man forever, why certainly not make use of these feelings making him regret he discarded you and ask you to have him back. Hey Belle- You need to read the scientific research instead of merely post it and also make assumptions. If you want to enjoy, you are going to absolutely enjoy and also you have to comprehend that there is no way to contentment which happiness is the means. We are happy when our team possess family members, we more than happy when our team have good friends and also mostly all the various other things we assume make our team satisfied are actually merely ways from obtaining extra family and friends. There's a variation, as well as you can change every one of your self-talk to be a lot more favorable, much more caring and also a lot more satisfied. But anyhow, they created me tremendously super pleased, which made me want to cease as well as reflect on all the other things that are making me happy in today times. Merely, if your near loved ones and also pals were happy folks, there's a superb opportunity that you are going to be actually as well. Mindfulness can help you to become happy with just what you possess by enabling you to actually cherish what you possess. If therefore, you're most likely looking for suggestions to celebrate this delighted occasion in a huge means. Photo a child that is simply happy to be (when they are not bursting into tears, that is!) Attempt switching your concentration to become, as well as think of an individual or something that you enjoy. I do not mind when our talks obtain a bit boring & our company lose traits to claim, only having you sufficients to make me satisfied. If you liked this article and you would such as to obtain even more details regarding yellow pages advert 1997 (http://bueno-en-salud22.info/eco-slim-2) kindly check out the web site. For additional l ove quotes, browse through the well-liked, a site that provides services for 'Leading 10' lists of quotations in dozens of categories.

[leroycamarena1-blog]

You Make Me Pleased In Spanish

They must be actually little points that I don't value usually adequate or take for granted in everyday lifestyle. Currently unless you want the partnerships to finish, you have to perform something to make amends for your actions that disturb your friend (or man or girl). I decided to check out things that create me pleased, and after that searched for methods to make cash by doing all of them. I hope you discovered one thing useful in this particular brief post as well as desire you all the best and pleased efficiencies. Perform something new once in a while to create every conflict impressive as well as memorable.

Make up a trivia test for your attendees, using unknown simple facts or celebrations coming from the birthday man or even woman's life. That could be your trouble, you are aiming to make him return instead of producing him intend to come back. Laughter absolutely is the most effective medicine and to be a pleased individual you must laugh. There are actually still a bunch of points to fret about, and also tons of decisions to make as each decision will certainly find out just how your Compact discs will certainly offer. Deliver invitations to an event; commemorate your nation and even more with individualized stationery produced the celebration. I am Arrozal Bernadette through name a resident of U.S.A that resided in so much depression, stress as well as complication just before i came in-contact through this incantation wheel that aided me handle my problem and created me pleased once more. Any individual that has developed their own food items or even florals recognizes the satisfied feeling from gathering their plants. And while opting for, be sure you are opting for the one that uses you the center from dining at the best prominent restaurants. Pleased folks often tend to be more beneficial, innovative, philanthropic, selfless as well as healthier. Simply see to it you classify each, so the various other parents know exactly what their kids are hearing! Should you have just about any concerns concerning where and the way to make use of yellow pages uk wiki (click the next website), you'll be able to email us at our web site. Probably you find yourself during that type-- effective but unfinished, certainly not pleased yet prosperous. While there are actually obviously points that happen in your life that produce you feel either satisfied or unhappy, the truth is that these take ins come and also they go. The much better furnished you end up being at dealing with the events that create you emphasize the a lot less impact that will have on your health and wellness and also happiness. Coming to grips along with finding mugs and saucers for the house style, trying out new plans for dining table tops and mats along with office chair seatings; substantial sufficient to get you an average rating of producing yourself delighted. Create a statement aloud to each various other preparing your intention to find more quiet as well as unified techniques of engaging to make sure that you connect much better, possess a lot less disagreements, and also extra positive discussions. You possess a willingness to stand up again and also make an effort - that are going to make you an absolutely happy individual. I go to a cross-roads in lifestyle and I should learn that I am as well as what in fact creates me delighted. I wish you enjoy these hilarious companionship quotes as high as I as if discussing them with you! The fact that our company usually perform this two times a day, 5 times a week, makes this unsurprising that its impact would accumulate gradually as well as make our team less and also much less delighted. He may concur certainly not to perform this any kind of longer, but that does not imply he'll be actually delighted and content along with his brand new sex lifestyle. Everything that we are for ... love, trust fund, peace, compassion, contentment, enables our company, as well as every little thing that we are against ... hate, rage, hesitation, fear, weakens our company. Right now choose: HAPPY or even UNHAPPY. Over my lifestyle, 53, I satisfied people that were very prosperous, however they were no therefore pleased as my Associates, Designers, Employees and also Organisation Partners, who made their success as well as joy continuously and developing gradually. You can easily use individualized stationery as invites to a get together enjoy this, or even to a yard sale or party. In fact, these projects commonly make individuals awful (unless your heart resides in exactly what you do). For instance, if you are waiting for a partner to follow in to your lifestyle to more than happy then you are perhaps focused on exactly what the feeling will certainly be like when you meet your partner and also just how your life are going to be different at that point that is right currently. This may appear a little bit of bizarre, yet deal with this momentarily ... you desire even more cash due to the fact that you think this will make you satisfied. Exactly what happened to me is not exactly what i can easily maintain just to on my own but to also say to the globe to make sure that those that were as soon as like me will certainly get there love ones back as well as mored than happy once again. You will definitely begin to view the world in adverse conditions as well as you will in fact often tend to attract additional factors making you dissatisfied. Prior to rumbling the seaweed and also the rice, ensure that the algae is actually put on a timber floor covering used to rumble the sushi (All these might be delivered at the nearby Oriental corner store). To obtain started you have to choose to create joy and happiness a concern in your lifestyle. We were actually with each other for greater than 8 years and also our experts were actually regularly happy along with our connection, i like him a great deal and he adore me.later he said to act in a different way he stop contacting me and also he informed me that he carry out certainly not like me once again. Considering that you manage your plan online, our company don't ask for any kind of administration charges if you make improvements (omits termination charges). Still, that doesn't indicate you should permit your feelings transmit everything you state or perform. That doesn't create any sort of sense to decided not to head to a party with him tonite due to the fact that he overlooked you acquired your hairstyle previously today. That's all-natural to rejoice when you experience definitely impressive traits in your relationship, your lifestyle, or your profession. If you make a decision seriously and then take action and do not give up, you will definitely manage to end up being an effective stay at property mama who not merely takes pleasure in being with her loved ones and also youngsters - as well as certainly her children enjoy her visibility in your home - but could clear up quantity from amount of money. Andrew was actually up next, when he got out of bed to the mic he pointed out, Therefore, I determined to perform this since I like a really good tune concerning daddy concerns." He introduced right into the song, and there was something concerning it that appeared fitting, although the tune was extremely various from Andrew's own account. I discovered through food preparation video games that to earn an excellent sushi, are sure that the fish is really fresh (as it is eaten raw). It goes without saying, he or she is the just one that recognizes which folks need to be there to earn this celebration specifically relevant. Considering that you never ever make him feel surrounded and he understands you are actually certainly not merely covered around his hands, he'll chase you.

[sammygirardin33-blog]

12 Love Estimates To Commemorate Sweetest Time

If you would like to produce your love life more beautiful as well as powerful, after that you must recognize the true meaning of passion and also nothing at all can take you true definition from love pretty like these wonderful affection quotes. You need to have to versed in several skill-sets such as investigation, persuasive writing, as well as editing and enhancing if you prefer to make your profession in essay composing solution. Just I haven't made a decision about the twinkle however, due to the fact that maybe that will create this obvious that I had actually heard their talk. As opposed to repaying and shedding your boyfriend forever, why not use these feelings to earn him lament he dumped you and beg you to have him back. It is actually for that reason crucial that our experts recognize what makes The lord delighted and also keep doing them in order to entice his good things. 2 Swiss financial experts who examined the result of travelling on joy located that such factors could certainly not counterbalance the agony developed by a lengthy commute. Considering that serotonin plays a role in understanding, researchers assumed that exposure to Mycobacterium will make their mice smarter. The words that create you become aware that you are actually not the exception, that there are others around who have actually been actually hurt as well as are actually experiencing as you are. The 11 tune cd just takes 31 moments in order to get through, and its encouraging, medium-paced tracks are terrific for whatever kind of state of mind you've located your own self in this particular week. If you have any concerns pertaining to in which and how to use yellow pages residential search uk (http://apeleclaraecorpo.info/soma-pro/), you can contact us at the webpage. Then they told me that they need to direct an incantation on him that will certainly create him come back to me and also the kids, they casted the spell and also after 1 week my husband phoned me and he told me that i ought to forgive him, he began to apologize on phone and also mentioned that he still live me that he performed unknown just what occur to him that he left me. that was actually the spell that he traditionalspellhospital directed on him that make him comeback to me today, me and also my household are right now happy again today. Dr.Zabaza is the wonderful man that managed to revive my aficionado within 48hours as well as since all of them my aficionado has actually been actually managing me along with a lot affection and also i have actually certainly never been actually so delighted as i am today. Yet, if you like to create precious jewelry, or even to compose, finding techniques making funds with your enthusiasm might be a little bit harder. Participation on this internet site by a party performs certainly not indicate endorsement from every other gathering's content, products, or even companies. I want to claim that I certainly never anticipated my partner to earn me pleased then, however I would certainly be existing. Thus, yes, Commenter, I can easily prefer to more than happy or believe moments of contentment as well as inner love, despite the only thing that's taking place. I feel that is actually not only my duty yet my role in order to help store a much more loving resonance on this world-- especially today. If you enjoy like me I will encourage you to simply get in touch with Dr. Lee by means of: Ancientfathersandmothers @ and also I promise you will not regret that by any means. Andrew was actually always therefore delighted that this experienced specifically rough when he got into among his dark moods. As well as if you intend to create your guy satisfied in the genuine sense, then you will definitely need to ensure adjustments in you. Vigilance should be actually taken, nonetheless, when trying to overcome a curse, as unskilled casters might in fact magnify this and also create it worse. Individuals throw colours on each other as well as dream Pleased Holi." People additionally create unique recipes at their property and eat along with their good friends. I'm at a cross-roads in lifestyle and also I need to discover who I am and also just what in fact creates me delighted. I hope you delight in these hilarious friendship prices quote as long as I as if discussing all of them with you! Because our team often perform this two times a time, 5 times a full week, creates it unsurprising that its result would accumulate eventually and make our team less and also a lot less satisfied. He could agree not to carry out that any longer, but that doesn't mean he'll be actually happy and content along with his brand-new sexual activity life. Yet if those memories create him open up to you and receive him curious at that point, raise additional from them and also enhance that your marriage is just what he needs, until you are particular how you can gain your partner back. Tell on your own that your feeling good is essential - the better you believe, the much more you can easily offer, as well as the greater influence you can easily create worldwide. My soul remained ever before confident that I will discover a pleased ending, yet due to some unsatisfactory options, I kept throwing myself on the rocks of dating dissatisfaction. To everybody on the market, I am going to be ordinary as well as quite sincere to you the only thing that Dr Shakes Harpoon has helped me revive Matthew back to my life as well as i am so pleased concerning this as i am actually mading this statement online to let all those that possesses this sort of love concern to talk to Dr Shakes to avoid consulting with those fraudsters that ripped me off my hard earned money without service before i was presented to Shakes Bayonet. She definitely understandinged of me and also had me to a shut restaurant near our working area and also explain her own love issues along with me and also how she acquired an incantation wheel that delivered her guy, her goals and also desire back to her and also create him like her like certainly never before. It takes a great deal of enthusiasm as well as love in the lifestyles from an individual to make certain that the couple is compatible with each other. Make certain That He Really isn't Merely Hearing Your Criticize Him: As an individual who has performed the opposite of this particular discussion, I can inform you that when you listen to these words, this could seem like an assault as well as that could believe as if you should defend on your own. When you value just how your other half thinks, he is actually goinged to be more pleased in the marriage, which in turn will certainly produce him delighted. Seeing you manage the break up so well will certainly make your ex-boyfriend recognize he overlooks you fast. If you want to follow their top and learn how you can make a person love you, right here are some perform's as well as perform n'ts to bear in mind. Those wild emotional states that you believe as a result of your fears need certainly not determine you. Image an infant which is just pleased to become (when they are actually certainly not crying, that is!) Try switching your emphasis to become, and also consider somebody or even one thing that you adore. I do not mind when our conversations obtain a little bit uninteresting & our team lose points to mention, only possessing you is enough making me satisfied. For even more l ove quotes, have a look at the preferred, a website that concentrates on 'Leading 10' listings from quotations in dozens from classifications. the great Dr i am actually satisfied as well as extremely happy wherefore you have actually done for me. I will certainly advise you my good friends out there that have mental problems or even wellness to call him right now through email oshogumspelltemple @ given that he has actually done wonders in my life as well as i believe he may aid you out in any sort of trouble.

[bladekindeyewear]

Boots Reads Homestuck Epilogue(s) Part 14 - Candy Page 27

==>

Alright, back from a brief excursion.  I really, REALLY wanna fucking finish this.  I want to see ROXY UNZOMBIFIED goddamnit, or at least get a REASON for her zombification, even if it’s just some Dirk-like villain who just cliffhangers himself away like a fucking asshole.

Also, comment on John’s whole rant... I guess John DID kind of want to be important.  Or... well, not “important” per se, but rather at least impactful in his friends’ lives.  It feels like they’re all walking dead through their own unsolved problems, trying to put on a pretty face, and nothing he tries to do matters, even attempted kidnapping.  He feels as useless as Dirk THINKS he is, but he never really was.  Gosh, I wish he’d pulled off that absurd kidnapping.  Freeing people from this sort of thing is supposed to kind of be his jam?

Okay, reading the new page.

FUCK.  TEN YEARS???????

Pff, John’s kid and sorta!Vriska.  Yeah I can buy that.

Also I love how they type out “Harry Anderson” every single time as his full first goddamn name.

--God damnit, how is Gamzee still fucking things up ten years later?  Hasn’t someone considered killing him?

Karkat and Meenah, also unsurprising.  Too bad Dave has to die unsatisfied.  >:(

Hm... this sorta!Vriska also has a weird Capitalization Quirk for Important Words, huh?  --Oh right, Kanaya raised her.  That might do it.

Hm, eyepatch?

Alright, the world’s falling into chaos.  Did the world HAVE to fucking fall into chaos in BOTH TIMELINES where these supposedly-went-through-a-successful-journey heroes managed to eek out victory despite opposing reality’s greatest tyrant?  Pfuh.

--and right.  Alt!Callie reinforces the idea that even though this possibility “wasn’t canon” -- which... means Meat is?? D: -- that the lives within still matter when looked at within their own bubble.

JADE: while abstracted heavily, and fully freed from all forces of narrative gravity, these events still represent possibilities that slept within the hearts of all who reside here.

Mhmm, part of an extension of themselves, their uniqueness, their hopes and dreams and... whatever WHOEVER did to fuck Roxy over.  Jesus DICK what’s happened to her I need to know you’d better fix this.

And somewhere within that mess, John Egbert is the best man at Jade and Dave’s wedding. He lasts nearly two hours before he gets a ruinous case of the sniffles.

Maybe they worked it out into ALMOST full mutual love?  Even if Dave’s 70% gayness goes totally unsatisfied?  I mean, I can hope, right?  :(

Dammit, Jade, couldn’t you have done this properly?  :C

and everyone knows that John has lost his family to Jane Crocker.

What the shit?!???

What drove Roxy away was him being depressed and just an all-around huge wet blanket who was impossible to live with. John is totally ready to own the fact that he was a bad husband, but maybe not the fact that he was a bad enough husband to drive his wife to passively support a brewing genocidal dictatorship. She looks happier, though, whenever he’s caught sight of her behind Jane—Calliope faithfully at her side—in any of the propaganda broadcasts that Jane passes off as business press conferences. By the time Roxy finally cut things off between them, he hadn’t personally seen her smile in years.

WHAT.  THE.  SHIT.

WHY DID ROXY DO ALL THIS THEN.  WHY DID SHE OF ALL PEOPLE, ONE OF THE MOST FORCEFUL AND SMART AND COOL--- GUHHH SHE JUST VOIDED HER WILL JUST OUT OF OBLIGATION TO JOHN OR SOMETHING?????????? WHAT THE FUCK WHYYYYYYY

Characters choke.  Characters make bad decisions.  That’s fair.  Andrew’s said that before.  But John was VISIBLY RECOGNIZING HOW OUT OF CHARACTER ROXY WAS ACTING.  WHYYYYYYYYY DID IT HAPPEN, WHY SUDDENLY DECADES OF MISHANDLED RELATIONSHIP WITH ABSOLUTELY NOBODY POINTING OUT THE OBVIOUS WHAT THE FUCK.  AND ROXY WAS THE ONE WHO STARTED IT AND PUSHED INTO JOHN UNTIL HE ACCEPTED.  WHY.

WHY.

Read.  Calm down.  Read.  There had better be.  A FUCKING.  ANSWER.

Hi military rebellion leader Karkat.

KARKAT: OH MY GOD JOHN, STOP BEING SO FUCKING PATHETIC FOR JUST A MINUTE. COULD YOU DO THAT FOR ME? JOHN: i don’t know. that’s a pretty big favor you’re asking me there, karkat.

heheh

JOHN: i dunno. it doesn’t seem responsible, really... to dedicate my life to something so important when i’m in a place where i can’t even find the energy to think that getting out of bed in the morning is “important.”

Depression stuff, yeah.

John really needs a psychologist who isn’t just Rose.

pff, yifftrain.

That’s how the years pass. Faster and faster the longer it goes. 

What.  The.  Fuck.

We’re not going to get any answers are we.  Roxy just acted out of character for no reason, didn’t she.  This is-- no, Andrew’s too GOOD at this for that to-- I mean--  is there a big answer he’s just not telling us-- FUCK!!!!  D:

AAAAAAAA

This sucks.  This sucks this sucks this SUCKS.  But I’ll keep reading.  I have to know.  If I’m ever going to be able to stand, like, i dunno... homestuck rp i guess? i should probably keep reading.  and hope i recover.  eventually.

But that’s only part of it. Above this Earth, the dead cherub is still meditating, waiting for the day when she can have her own heroic apotheosis. Waiting for the day when she can confront the one she calls the Prince. And on this Earth, John is just waiting for the day that feeling finally stops. That feeling that he’s still waiting for something, and the even worse feeling that years ago, he missed his only chance to put an end to it. If you stand on a very high hill at dawn, you can watch your shadow move in an arc around you.

Yeah, reinforcing that John would be happier in the timeline where he did something and -- at least temporarily, since there’s hope of future revival -- “died” because of it, even if he wasn’t clear on why what he was trying to do even really mattered in the whole scheme of things.

...which is pretty weird when you consider the ending of Homestuck didn’t try to express that messa-- no, wait.  I guess it did?

Yes, everyone went to the post-victory planet to live out indefinite lives, but there WAS still the stage play.  Proving that John, at least, WOULD eventually step outside the happy ending to instead risk his life doing something important.  They earned both possibilities, really, to choose from at their will.

...Aren’t there another dozen pages or so left in this Candy segment, though??  Are we gonna follow their kids or something?

==>

...Okay so stuff still needs to happen here, plotways.  Good.  I think.

A flash above the clouds catches John’s attention: another ghost, falling down from wherever it is they come from. John follows after the light with an exhausted sigh. The novelty of dead trolls falling from the sky has really worn off over the years. But he might as well go warn the new arrival that they’ve landed in the middle of an imminent warzone. He sets down at the edge of the crater and peers through the smoke.

He recognizes the ghost immediately, because he sees a younger version of her almost every day.

JOHN: vriska?

Vriska’s face snaps up, eyes blazing. Eyes. Actual eyes, with expression, color, pupils, and everything.

JOHN: wait. you’re... JOHN: alive??

PFFFFFFhahahahah!

That’s pretty hilarious.  Vriska fell into the singularity and popped out here.

...Yeah, you can’t stand having missed the most “important” bit, can you.  Too bad.  You didn’t have the spotlight in the end.

==>

JADE: it is the one i have been waiting for all these years. JADE: we have run along parallel lines for what may as well be eternity, but my gravitational well has finally ensnared him. JADE: and now he is due to fall into this world.

Uhh, who?  Davebot or something, from the postscript?  Couldn’t be Gamzee, unless it’s, like... a different Gamzee.

“Chaos war”?  That’s a dramatic title.

==>

Hmm, reading reading...

Will Dad’s passing knock any sense into you?  Probably not.

...yeah, it wasn’t going to be that easy, was it?

Of course.  Of course Dad died saving the President.

Although, she’s going to assign fault to Karkat and then want to start a full bloody war over it, so, the opposite of having sense knocked into her then.

JANE: UGH! JANE: That... that fool!! JANE: I can’t believe that he would do this! JANE: How could he do this to me!?! JAKE: Janey... JANE: The human president could be anyone! JANE: My dad can’t be anyone but him!

Jane, you’ve become a real asshole. ��:(

...Fuck you Gamzee.

GAMZEE: hEy. GAMZEE: Do YoU tHiNk ThAt MiGhT bE a BiT mOtHeRfUcKinG xEnOpHoBiC?

PFFFFHAHAHAHAHAAHAHhhh oh my GOD :’D

JANE: What? You think appealing to me with your disgusting little addiction is going to sway me?

Oh Jesus Christ that’s horrifying.  THAT’s what’s been going on.  I don’t want to visualize it, dear lord.

==>

Hahahah, catching Vriska up.  She’s practically curling up in a ball like Squidward in future shock.

PFFF PUTTING PARENS AROUND HER NAME SHE CAN’T STAND BEING IRRELEVANTIZED LIKE THAT

JOHN: i was supposed to go fight lord english, but i didn’t. so now we’ve gone beyond, like, the event horizon of canon. (VRISKA): What the fuck does that even MEAN????????

Wait, shouldn’t YOU know exactly what that means, Vriska?  Like, better than most people at least?

JOHN: all i know is that all of this is my fault.

:(

JOHN: it’s been turning around in my head like this for a while. i thought... JOHN: why does everything here fucking SUCK so much? JOHN: how the hell did we even make it from point A to point festering clusterfuck? JOHN: it doesn’t follow any kind of logic i understand, or any sort of basic sense i have about who we are as people... JOHN: and why? why have we all ended up so unhappy and... twisted up?

Yeah, a BUNCH of people have acted really goddamn out of character and it’s unclear why.

JOHN: i got everything i wanted. everyone got what they— JOHN: what i thought they wanted. JOHN: and that’s just it, isn’t it? JOHN: the more i think about it, i’m the only factor that matters to anything.

--What?!?  No!!!  You could SEE that this wasn’t what you thought they wanted right from the get-go.  It couldn’t have been YOUR imagination that this realm of alternative possibility was drawn from, could it?  D:

JOHN: whatever i did, or didn’t do, just... destroyed reality’s ability to, like, substantiate itself, or whatever. JOHN: like there’s a bug in the operating system of whatever force in this world that regulates cause and effect. JOHN: everything’s been unraveling. nothing that happens makes sense anymore. JOHN: and now i’m the only person out here who’s even real at all! JOHN: hahahaha.

That’s certainly an idea at least, that people started acting out of character as we went further from “canon”.  In fact, it’s kind of a slam at fanfics, maybe?  Acknowledging that they distort the characters by understanding them in different ways, sometimes, and.. hm.

(VRISKA): Hahahahahahahaha... Wow, I’ve never seen a guy get his 8ulge all the way down his own swallow chute 8efore! JOHN: wait, what? (VRISKA): Good fuck. Do you actually think reality gives that much of a shit a8out you? (VRISKA): Get real, Eg8ert. (VRISKA): It’s not like you’re me. JOHN: ok, well. JOHN: that’s fair i guess.

Heheheh.  ...Yeah, Vriska might pep talk him out of this self-deprecating theory of his.  Besides, I mean... is that the ONLY cause for this whole fucking situation?  That Roxy’s will got eroded to nothing arbitrarily either at random in a glitching non-canon timeline or because John kind of maybe thought something was going to happen and reality decided to run with it??

...heheh, “batterpanzers”.

I’m pretty sure caring what “c8non” is supposed to be is EXACTLY the thing you’re freaking out about, Vriska, whether you realize it or not.

Oooh, Gamzee.  Do we get to see Vriska kill him?

Yeaaah... redemption ain’t for THIS sp8der.  The ghost version of Vriska got the closest thing to redemption she’ll ever get; THIS version never learned any damn lessons and is not going to accept that she ever NEEDS to.  Also, you said her name in relevance-reducing parentheses.  Bad move.

==>

Yaaaay here’s the bunch of indigo blood we were promised!! :D

Where’s the nudity though? Maybe that’s coming.

He yowls as if he had actual testicles to be mauled, and for all anyone knows, maybe he really does.

It’s reassuring to see that while Andrew is more than willing to give us WAY too much genital detail in some cases throughout this epilogue, he still knows how to deftly exploit the parts of anatomy that still AREN’T explicitly characterized and remain intentionally vague for their impactful resulting humor.  :)

She lunges at Gamzee’s catastrophic face lips-first, and practically dives into his mouth, ramming her tongue into his

NOOO FUCK HE WAS ABOUT TO DIE AAAAAA D’:

FUCK  :(

Okay, back on to anything but this.

==>

Oh shit, double Vriska.  This might be bad.

...Phew.  Nice save, John.

JOHN: ha ha. yeah, right. because this is real life, right? JOHN: i guess reading narrative relevance into a bunch of dumb and totally random events is kind of lame and childish. ROSE: No, that isn’t what I meant at all. ROSE: By all means, apply a narrative to our lives. Up until a certain point, it would have been perfectly accurate to do so. ROSE: But not anymore. JOHN: because... it’s not canon, right? ROSE: Do you remember what I told you years ago? About the three pillars of canon?

Wuh-oh.

ROSE: As I explained to you on that morning sixteen years ago, there are three critical features of canon: essentiality, relevance, and truth. JOHN: yeah. ROSE: We have been untethered from the mooring of “truth” for some time now. ROSE: So while we, in our subjective experiences of conscious perception, feel in this moment that we have known each other for a very long time, technically it’s not true at all.

...Okay.  Okay.

So.  Were, like.

Roxy and Calliope affected by the, like... “untruth wave” of his choice not to go the hardest, because he made it in their vicinity?  And that turned Roxy into a hypnozombie with minimal apparent free will? :C

...Oh wow.  She’s thanking John that she got a chance to be happy in this side timeline, even if so many other people suffered.  Because of the fucking hell Dirk was about to unleash on her in the Meat timeline.  Fuck.

ROSE: In the silly wizard story I wrote when I was a child, ROSE: The realm most comparable to heaven existed in a state of subliminal conditionality, dependent on the inscience of the individual experiencing it. ROSE: Which is to say that it would cease to exist the moment you realized what it was. ROSE: And so, those with knowledge could never truly be happy.

Oh wow, huh.  Yeah, knowing you’re just in a fanfic kind of screws your appreciation for life around you, huh.  So John got fucked over a bit by his metatextual awareness.  :(

And... Rose was, like, cut off by his choice from her own metatextual awakening, maybe?  Hence her ability to appreciate a life somewhere disconnected from anything “canon”?

ROSE: But that isn’t me anymore. ROSE: I am blind against the veil of this world. ROSE: It’s all ambrosia to me. ROSE: I don’t care if it’s not true. I care even less if it’s not canon. ROSE: I have a beautiful wife who I love more than I thought possible, and a daughter who I am immeasurably proud of. ROSE: It can all be senseless, ephemeral noise that dissolves in the void. A whisper swept up by the wind before it’s uttered. ROSE: I’m still grateful to have felt this way.

:’)

Alright, this might be a pretty good way of accepting their potential happiness in different timelines as a potential substitute for Dirk’s mess.  I’m not sure HOW well I’ll be able to internalize it to stop the stomach cramps, but we’ll see.

We still have a little bit more left, though.  Next post.

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